Darkwing Duck (1991) s01e45 Episode Script

The Incredible Bulk

# Daring duck of mystery Champion of right # Swoops out of the shadows Darkwing owns the night # Somewhere some villain schemes But his number's up # Darkwing Duck When there's trouble you call DW # Darkwing Duck # Let's get dangerous # Darkwing Duck # Darkwing, Darkwing Duck # Cloud of smoke and he appears # Master of surprise # Who's that cunning mind behind that shadowy disguise? # Nobody knows for sure But bad guys are out of luck # 'Cause here comes - # Darkwing Duck - # Look out! # When there's trouble you call DW # Darkwing Duck # Let's get dangerous # Darkwing Duck # Better watch out, you bad boys # Darkwing Duck # [Gosalyn.]
Oh, what a drag.
Who wants to analyze stupid plants for a stupid science project? This is boring.
I could be out ridding St.
Canard of evildoers.
What's wrong with my idea for the science project? Mr.
Avery said giant squids and plutonium don't mix.
Yeah, but at least they'd be fun at parties.
Plants are major-league boring.
This looks like a job for Darkwing Dad.
Gosalyn, Gosalyn, Gosalyn.
You don't hear me complaining about being bored.
That's because you're a parent.
No, it's just that I know the value of education.
Remember, the power of Darkwing Duck is his intellect, his amazing powers of deduction.
Name: Reginald Bushroot.
Occupation: plant manager.
[laughs.]
Get it, Spike? Plant man Spike! [panting.]
[Bushroot.]
Oh, poor Spike.
I never dreamt that my fertilizer would shrink you like this.
[sniffs.]
Ah! But with this new experimental fertilizer, Spike, I can restore you to your full size! Hmm.
"Warning.
This untested, incredibly powerful fertilizer will cause plants to grow like crazy, or kill them instantly.
" [growls.]
- Come on! Open up.
- [whimpering.]
Oh, don't be such a baby.
Whoa! Oof! Oh! Fine.
I'll prove it won't hurt you.
Here you grow, my little friend.
Well! I've created a regular Arnold Oleander.
[barking.]
Now, now.
Come on, come on.
Cut it out.
Don't fight.
Ooh, isn't he marvelous, Spike? That's a truly awesome blossom.
[growls.]
[Bushroot.]
This fertilizer is the greatest! Why, I'd know that insipid voice anywhere.
It's that weed wimp, Bushroot.
[Darkwing.]
I am the terror that flaps in the night.
I am the weed whacker in the garden of evil.
I am Darkwing Duck! You'd better get tough in a hurry, Bushroot.
Hey, I don't have to get tough.
My daisy already is.
Huh? [stammering.]
It's a good thing flowers are so gentle and harmless.
What's going on? Ah! Way to grow, Daisy! That's showing them flower power! [whimpering.]
Gosalyn, over there.
Weed killer.
Got it, Honk.
[straining.]
I did it, guys.
- Whoa! - [sputtering.]
- Fighting dirty! - Come on, Honk.
Let's do some gardening.
We'd better make like a tree and leave! So was that an example of your stunning intellect or your dynamic deduction? Hmm.
Maybe I have been favoring brains over brawn a little bit.
Not that I'm not in great shape.
We'll see about that.
OK, you puny trainees.
Fall in! You're gonna work and sweat and feel the burn.
You're gonna beg me to quit.
Hey! No pain, no gain.
I can take anything you can dish out.
Ooh, how about chocolate ice cream? Hey, hey, hey! Why does Launchpad here get to chow down and not me? Gee, DW, how would you hold the spoon? You know the routine.
Now get started! [grumbling.]
One, two, three! You're doing great, DW.
[slurping.]
- OK, time to build up your stomach.
- But That comes later.
A hundred sit-ups, let's go! Uh! Oh! Ah! Like you said, DW, no pain, no gain.
Very nice! Now, Dad Sorry, DW.
This isn't so hard.
Whoa, you really got into great shape, DW.
I'm a new duck, Launchpad.
I'll teach that rotten root a thing or two about conditioning.
Looking good, Dad.
That's because I exercise and eat right.
Ugh! Unlike some people around here.
Now, why don't you get some raw nuts and tofu from the kitchen.
Ew! I'll stick with Chocolate Yip-Yaps.
Snack time, Honk.
Honk man, you spend too much time indoors.
Um, yes, sir.
But I was just examining the fertilizer.
It's unusually strong.
Well, plug your nose and forget about it.
You kids should get outside, run around, breathe some fresh air.
[Honker.]
But it's dark out, sir.
- Honker's trying to help, Dad.
- I don't need help.
I'll take on Bushroot and his aromatic associate, just as soon as I can find them.
If he wants more fertilizer, sir, he'll have to go back to the arboretum.
Hmm, I wonder if he might go back to the arboretum.
With this fertilizer, I'll make a whole bombastic bouquet to do my dirty work.
It's harvest time, you lowlife legume.
You've soiled this town long enough, Bushroot.
Hi-ya! - [grunting.]
- My flower is floundering! [laughs.]
Had enough, petal head? Hey, no fair! [gasps.]
Now that's what I call a pistol-packing petal head.
[scoffs.]
No matter.
The bigger they are, the harder they pound me into the ground.
Whoa! And the final score: plants, one, Darkwing Duck, a basket case! Whoa! He's really stuck.
I hate to pry, but [straining.]
Flattened by a flower.
How humiliating.
- What you got, Honk? - This fertilizer is very unstable.
But it does promote incredible growth in living cells, - drastically increasing their strength.
- Sounds good to me.
[stammers.]
There's no telling how it'll act on a duck! Nonsense, Honker.
There's nothing to worry about.
I feel I feel I feel nothing.
I guess it only works on [muttering.]
They say that when you look good, you feel good.
And I look great! - I'm invincible! - Whoa! [Gosalyn.]
Dad! Be careful! [Darkwing.]
Don't worry.
It's time for action.
But your condition is highly unstable.
Yeah, and what about your deduction and analytical thinking? Ha! That stuff's for eggheads.
No offense, Honker.
- None taken, sir.
- Well, I'm off.
A manly duck takes direct action.
Yeah, but you got no transportation, DW.
Please.
Vehicles are for wimps.
And Darkwing Duck is no wimp! Don't worry.
He's still falling.
Dad! It's time to clip that hedge-head, Bushroot.
I'm gonna market video tapes of my workout program.
You better take a look at this before you get too excited.
I gave these rats some of Bushroot's fertilizer.
That's what gave them muscles, just like the daisy and your dad.
So forget the workout program.
We'll sell the fertilizer.
[sighs.]
How are you gonna find Bushroot, DW? Easy.
I'll just go door to door.
[screams.]
Whoa! I mean, oops! Sorry.
I'll find that shrewish shrub if I have to lift every building in the city.
[chewing.]
Now, don't worry.
We're just gonna take a few cuttings.
This is gonna hurt me more than it hurts you.
- [belches.]
- Ew.
Plants nowadays.
You can't teach them any manners.
[slurping.]
There.
Now that wasn't so bad, was it? At last, I've got a family and someone to do my dirty work.
- Isn't this wonderful, Spike? - [growls.]
- [tires screeching.]
- [flowers squeaking.]
OK, OK.
Fun is fun.
But we can't cruise around all day, can we? [groaning, belches.]
[Bushroot howls.]
[slurping.]
[whistle blows.]
I so love tea, don't you? Oh, yes.
Quite.
First the flowers are crushed into little tea leaves.
Oh, I just adore the way the tea leaves are then cramped forcefully into convenient little bags.
I'm quite certain we have the most peaceful job on Earth.
Don't you agree? I'm afraid I'm in no position to concur, old boy.
Oh, my! It's a good thing flowers are so gentle and harmless.
Hey, DW.
What clever, sneaky trick are you gonna use on Bushroot? How about this entrance line? I am the snail that wastes all your leaves.
Huh? [laughs.]
Pretty good, huh? Oh! Psychological tricks are for wimps.
Time to do a little old-fashioned weed pulling.
Uh-oh, this doesn't look good.
Gee, I didn't realize the mixture was this unstable.
This is horrible.
You said it.
We can't sell this stuff now.
Everybody'll want their money back.
There is a bigger problem, Gosalyn.
Your dad used this fertilizer.
Just imagine what'll happen to him! [clanging.]
No, no! Not the limes! Well, at least they didn't call us limeys.
Oh, come on now, guys.
You can't blame them because tea is made from plants.
Uh, guys? Trouble's brewing, leaf-lips.
She loves me, she loves me not! She loves me! [growling.]
It's just you and me, petal head.
- [flower laughs.]
- [straining.]
Oh, no! My physique's becoming weak.
- And I'm up the creek.
- [flowers laughing.]
Hang on, DW! Whoa! I wouldn't call those athlete's feet.
[snickering.]
You wouldn't leave me alone, would you? Now you'll see.
When that kettle whistles, boiling water will fill this cup.
Then we can all enjoy some nice fresh duck tea! [Darkwing.]
This bag won't budge.
[laughs.]
I guess a watched kettle never boils, right, guys? [laughs.]
Now where's everybody going? Aw, come on, guys! I wanna watch! I never get to have any fun.
[Darkwing.]
As soon as I get out, I'm gonna tear those three flowers - leaf from stem.
- [Bushroot.]
Spike! Come, Spike! Spike! Relax, Launchpad.
I'll save you way before that kettle whistles.
[kettle whistling.]
[Darkwing.]
Probably.
[both.]
Uh-oh.
Whoa! Whoa! I like a hot bath, but not steam cleaning! Come on, Launchpad.
We've got to stop Bushroot and his pals before they turn the city to mulch.
Are you sure this fertilizer is gonna work, Honk? Um, no.
They went this way! Come on, Honk, we've gotta find Dad.
We'll turn this whole park into a plants-only paradise.
What's the plan, DW? The plan? That's right, I make plans.
I outwit opponents.
I am the shrewd terror that outsmarts in the night.
I am Darkwing [stammering.]
Duck! - See? - I'm not sure I got that plan.
Never mind.
Just follow me.
[flowers squeaking.]
[whimpering.]
Help me! Why don't you leave some for the fishes.
- [crying.]
- My three sons! [Darkwing.]
Prepare to be julienned, potato head.
Wow.
And I thought you had a big mouth before.
[growling.]
No! This guy would make some boutonniere.
- [screeches.]
- [crying.]
[growls.]
Looks like you need a pick-me-up, Darkwing.
Yeah, but it was one heck of a throw.
Ha! Take that, petal head! [growling.]
[Gosalyn.]
Run, Darkwing! [screeches.]
Hey, your roots are showing.
Go, my daisy dynamo, and pluck that duck! DW! Up here! Pour it on, Launchpad! Yikes! Whoops! Don't shoot! Tell your flower to leave Darkwing alone, or you'll be sucking weed killer.
Hey! Thanks, Spike.
Let's go see Daisy finish off Dirtwing.
[growls.]
[buzzing.]
Stupid bee.
Get It's coming! Here's more fertilizer.
[Gosalyn.]
What are you doing? Brain not brawn, remember? [laughs.]
This should be good.
[buzzing.]
[screams.]
Looks like your flowers have wilted, hedge head.
[Launchpad.]
Hang on, DW.
[both.]
No! Launchpad, the daisy already ran away.
Oh! [laughs.]
Whoops! Well, I'll bet the view is great up there.
Come on, Spike.
Let's go.
[gasps.]
What a disaster.
Oh, well.
At least I can depend on you, Spike, old boy.
[pants.]
[scoffs.]
This stuff better wear off in a hurry.
That's all I gotta say.
Yes, sir.
In the crime fighting game, brawn helps.
But it's brains that make the real difference.
[Gosalyn.]
Calling Darkwing Duck! Lower, paying customers! OK, fine.
Wow, Gosalyn.
You've got the most popular science project in school.
Yep, yep, yep, yep.
[sighs.]
And this skateboard idea turns a cool profit.
[Gosalyn.]
Just think.
Next year, we could do ice skating.
It's a living.
# Darkwing Duck # Darkwing Duck # Darkwing Duck # Darkwing Duck
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