I Dream of Jeannie (1965) s01e30 Episode Script
I'll Never Forget What's Her Name
Jeannie.
Jeannie.
Oh, Jeannie, you can come out now.
Coming, master.
-Good morning, master.
-Good morning.
-l must have overslept.
-Oh, that's all right.
Jeannie, do you remember l asked you--? To go out to lunch with me this afternoon? l remember.
Well, l'm afraid l'm not gonna be able to take you to lunch.
You do not like the way l look? Jeannie, every girl in the world should be sort of lucky to look like that.
-Do you mean that, master? -Of course l do.
But that's beside the point.
l got a letter from my Aunt Pauline in Denver this morning and some friend of hers, a Miss Gordon is arriving at Cocoa Beach this morning.
She wants me to show her around.
Would you like me to help you, master? No, l think l can take care of this myself.
Did you hurt yourself? No, no, no.
Hello.
l'm Tony Nelson.
Who are you? Oh, you must be Miss Gordon.
-l've been expecting you.
-You have been expecting me? My aunt wrote me you were coming.
Sorry l didn't hear you come in.
-Would you like some coffee? -You do not recognize me? Well, not from Aunt Pauline's description, l don't recognize you.
l was expecting someone more.
More mature.
-But-- But-- -Just call me Tony.
-What's your first name? -Jeannie.
Jeannie.
Well, l'm certainly glad to meet you, Jeannie.
How do you feel now? l never felt better in my life.
l owe Aunt Pauline a big favour.
Excuse me, please.
-Don't go away.
-Oh, no.
l will not.
-Hi.
-Hi.
Good morning, Roge.
Boy, you seem awfully happy for a Monday morning.
Yeah, l am.
Do you believe in love at first sight? Well, it happens to me almost every day.
No, l'm serious.
l really think l'm in love.
You, old Two-Feet-on-the-Ground Nelson? That's hard to believe.
l know.
lt's hard for me to believe too.
My Aunt Pauline in Denver asked me to take out a friend of hers and this friend turns out to be the most beautiful girl -l've ever seen.
-Really? -Yeah.
l can't wait for you to meet her.
-ls she here? Hi.
Well, where's the--? Where's the girl? Jeannie, this is a very good friend of mine Major Roger Healey.
Jeannie Gordon.
You are in a playful mood, aren't you? We better be getting over to the base.
Aren't you at least gonna say, '' How do you do?'' What-- What for? lt's customary when you meet someone, especially a lady.
-You have to get used to Roger.
-She is used to me.
Hey, what's going on here? l told you.
My Aunt Pauline asked me to take out Miss Gordon while she's in Cocoa Beach.
-Will you tell me what's going on? -Major Nelson explained it.
-l'm a friend of his aunt.
-Yeah, Roger-- Could l trouble you for a cup of coffee, please? Certainly.
You can trouble me for anything you want.
-l must be in the wrong house.
-Major Healey something terrible has happened.
Major Nelson hit his head and now he does not remember me.
You mean he has amnesia? Wait a minute.
He can't have amnesia.
He remembers me.
l do not understand it.
He thinks l am a complete stranger.
That's it.
His subconscious mind has blocked you out.
Oh, why would it want to do that? l suppose because it had trouble accepting you.
-You gotta blink him out of it right away.
-l tried.
-What happened? -He just blinked back at me.
Did you tell him you were the genie he found in the bottle? -No.
-Well, that's it.
Just tell him and everything will be fine.
l do not think l can do that.
-Well, why not? -Because he-- He seems to like me the way l am and l would not be surprised if he wanted to marry me.
You can't do that.
-Why not? -Because l'm not gonna let you.
l'm going out there and tell him the truth.
Jeannie! Jeannie! Jeannie! -Where's Roger? -He had to leave.
He's always in a hurry.
-How do you like your coffee? -Oh, any way that you like it.
Oh, let me do it for you.
A little bit of sugar and a little bit of cream.
How did you know? Oh, well, l-- l sensed it.
Jeannie, l hope you don't think l'm being fresh or anything but l feel as though l've known you forever.
-l feel the same way.
-Do you? How long are you planning to stay in Cocoa Beach? Oh, as long as you want me to.
Then l have a feeling you're gonna be staying here for a long, long time.
Tony? Major Healey.
Dr.
Bellows, have you seen Tony? He finished the experiment and went home.
l believe he had an engagement.
Did he say he had an engagement or was being engaged? -What? -Oh, nothing serious.
-What happened to your fingers? -Oh, it's just a little frostbite, sir.
Frostbite? ln July? -How was the South Pole? -Great if you don't mind being bitten by a lovesick penguin.
-Where's Tony? -Major Nelson is upstairs.
-Well, have you told him yet? -Oh, l could not.
l have never seen him so happy.
Besides, you know l will make him a wonderful wife.
He can't marry a genie! But he will not know that l am a genie! Yes, he will, because l'm gonna tell him.
Jeannie! Jeannie! Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
Jeannie! -Did l hear the door? -Oh, it was nothing.
Someone made a mistake.
Where would you like to go to dinner tonight? Why do we not have dinner here? l can cook for you.
-You mean you can cook too? -Oh, well, you love my cook-- Well, you will love my cooking.
l can cook all of your favourite dishes.
Oh, how would you know what my favourite dishes are? Oh, l know many things about you.
You know, l can't get over this feeling that-- That l've known you all my life.
lt seems so natural to be with you.
Oh, l am glad that you feel that way.
-l will go start dinner.
-Okay.
Tony? Oh, sir, have you seen Tony? -He just left.
l believe he went home.
-Thank you, sir.
Major what happened to your arm? Oh, nothing, sir.
l was attacked by a tribe of pygmies.
Pygmies.
ln Cocoa Beach? You're a marvellous dancer, Jeannie.
Anyone could dance with you.
l could hold you in my arms forever, Jeannie.
Jeannie.
-Do not say it.
-No, l'm gonna say it.
l love you, Jeannie.
l want to marry you.
Oh, but you do not know anything about me.
l know all l need to know about you.
l must tell you what l really am.
No, l know what you really are.
You're the only girl l've ever fallen in love with.
-Are you sure? -Positive.
Well, then-- Then it would be wrong for me not to marry you -would it not? -You mean you will? lf you wish it.
May l have a cup of coffee, please? You want a cup of coffee at a time like this? Please.
l guess l do have a few things to learn about you, don't l? -A few.
-Sure.
Hello.
l'm Francine Gordon.
l think Major Nelson's expecting me.
He was expecting you, but l do not think he's expecting you anymore because he's busy getting ready to be married.
Married? His aunt didn't tell me.
Oh, well, it was a big surprise to everyone.
l see.
Well, tell him l hope he'll be very happy.
Oh, he will be.
Very happy.
Jeannie.
-Here's your coffee.
-Coffee at a time like this? Jeannie! Jeannie! Good morning, Major Healey.
Good morning, Dr.
Bellows.
l trust you've recovered from your frostbite.
Yes, sir.
Fine-- And your wounds from the pygmy attack.
-Oh, yes, sir.
-Why are you limping? Oh, it's nothing, sir.
lt's just a slight touch of the bends, that's all.
The bends? On dry land? -Tony.
-Hi.
-Are you alone? -Yeah.
Where have you been? l've been looking for you.
Are you kidding? Where haven't l been? l've been to the South Pole, the Amazon jungle 20,000 leagues under the sea.
-What are you talking about? -Ask your friend, Jeannie.
-What's Jeannie got to do with this? -She's the one that put me there.
-Are you feeling all right? -Yeah, l guess l'm okay.
Outside of a slight case of the bends.
Oh, boy, are you in trouble.
Trouble? l haven't got a trouble in the world.
l got great news for you.
What a wonderful girl.
l feel like l've known her forever.
You could have known her for 2000 years.
Roger -we're getting married.
-Mar-- Married? -l want you to be my best man.
-l'm sorry, l can't.
-Why--? Why not? -l'll probably be in orbit by then.
-Listen.
You can't marry Jeannie.
-Why not? Because she spells her name with a G.
She is a genie.
Roger, maybe you better lie down, huh? There's no point in my lying down.
l'm gonna be taking-- l'm gonna be taking a trip here any minute.
You've gotta listen to me.
Jeannie is a genie.
-You found her on a beach in a bottle.
-l did? Yeah.
Don't you remember? The time your capsule went out of orbit and you made the crash landing.
Crash landing.
And when l landed, l-- l-- l-- -l found her in the bottle on the beach? -That's it! Since then, she's been doing crazy things to you.
Like an elephant in the bedroom, lions in the living room, floating in the air.
How could l forget something like that? -See why you can't marry Jeannie? -Of course, of course-- Astronauts can't go around marrying genies, can they? Good boy.
You don't know what a relief this is to me.
l didn't think l'd get to you in time.
She kept blinking me, sending me to far-off places.
Roger, l'll have a long talk with her -so she doesn't do that to you again.
-Thanks, Tony.
Look, l've-- l've got all this paperwork to get out.
l've gotta get it to-- To Captain Freed.
-You wait here for me.
-l'll wait here.
Major Healey thinks you're going to marry a genie in a bottle? That's right, sir.
-And are you? -Well, of course not.
There's no such thing as a genie.
You've gotta help him.
He's had some kind of a nervous breakdown.
You say he thinks this genie sent him off to the South Pole the Amazon jungles and under the sea? Yes, yes.
-lt all begins to tie in.
-Tie in with what, sir? Oh, with Major Healey's peculiar behaviour.
Oh, Major Nelson, l owe you an apology.
-What? Me, sir? -Well, l've done you an injustice.
l've been blaming all the peculiar things that have been going on around here on you and all the time it was Major Healey.
-Can you help him, sir? -Well, l'm certainly gonna try, major.
-Thank you for coming in.
-He's my best friend.
We'll do everything we can.
Thank you.
-Hi, Roge.
-Well, l'm still here.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, so l see.
How you feeling? Great.
l thought l'd be in Timbuktu by now.
Would you like to go to Timbuktu? Well, why would l wanna go to Timbuktu? Oh, l don't know.
You brought it up.
That's right.
-Can l get you something? -No, l -better be getting back to my office.
-l wouldn't leave yet.
-l have work-- -l'll take care of it.
l have a feeling Dr.
Bellows wants you to wait for him here.
Why would Dr.
Bellows want me to wait for him here? Roger, you're not a well man.
Wait a minute.
You didn't tell Dr.
Bellows what l told you, did you? l did it for your own good.
You need help.
l need help? l need-- l need-- You know what you've just done? You just got yourself thrown out of the space program -and me along with you.
-Don't get excited.
Oh, why get excited? You just tossed my whole life away.
-How could you do this to me? Me? -l did it for your own good.
You don't really believe there's a genie in a bottle? Look who's asking.
lt's your genie.
My genie? Roger, my Jeannie is a wonderful, lovely girl.
Yeah, if you don't mind getting bitten by penguins.
Roger, you're in terrible shape.
You've got to pull yourself together.
Thank heavens you're here, doctor.
l don't think we got a moment to lose.
Major Nelson tells me that you think he's getting married.
Did he say that, sir? To a genie who lives in a bottle.
ls that true? l'd rather not answer that, sir on the grounds it might incriminate me and some friends of mine.
You've gotta tell him everything.
Major Healey, this isn't a legal hearing, yet.
lt's just a preliminary psychiatric examination.
Do you think that Major Nelson is going to marry a genie? Sir, l'd rather not answer that.
He's only trying to help you.
Now answer his questions.
Okay.
Okay.
But you're gonna be in for a big surprise.
l'm waiting, Major Healey.
-Yes, sir.
-Yes, sir, what? Yes, sir, Major Nelson is going to marry a genie in the bottle.
And it serves him right! l told him not to marry a genie, but he wouldn't listen.
What will it look like, you married to a genie? -Don't get excited.
Just-- -Oh, boy.
Don't get excited.
Yeah.
-l'll handle it now, major.
-You're gonna be all right.
You're gonna be just fine.
What a best friend l picked for my best friend.
Now just lie down there on the couch.
-Lie down? -Right here.
That's it.
Here we go.
Yeah.
Here we go.
l want you to breathe deeply.
l'll be right back.
Breathe deeply.
General Peterson.
-Yes, doctor? -This is it.
-This is what? -When l tell you what's happened.
Doctor, is this about Major Nelson again? Yes, sir, and Major Healey.
Then let me warn you before you open your mouth.
lf you're wrong again, you're in trouble.
Now, what did you want to tell me? Could you wait just one moment, sir? Major Healey, l wanna be very sure.
You did say that Major Nelson is going to marry a genie in a bottle? -Yes, sir.
-That's all l want to know.
Breathe deeply.
Major Nelson is marrying a genie in a bottle? Oh, of course he's not, general.
We know there's no such thing, but Major Healey doesn't know it.
-He really believes it.
-Why, he can't believe it.
There's no doubt about it.
He admitted it.
This time l think we've gotten to the bottom of everything.
Let's go see Major Healey.
He's gone.
Oh, but don't worry, general.
We'll catch him at the wedding.
Yes, thank you, Judge Harris.
l certainly appreciate it.
No, no, we'll just have a simple wedding.
Just a moment.
Unless you'd like a more elaborate ceremony.
Oh, no, no.
A simple ceremony will be just fine.
Okay.
A simple ceremony it is.
Yes.
We'll be there in about an hour.
Right.
Thank you.
Well, that's it.
Oh, Jeannie, l have to get you a ring.
What kind would you like? What's the matter, Jeannie? l wish l could be sure that l'm doing the right thing.
-Well, you love me, don't you? -Oh, you do not know how much.
And l love you.
So of course you're doing the right thing.
-Could l have a cup of coffee? --cup of coffee? -Now? -Please.
Sure.
Sure.
Major.
-What are you doing, Major Healey? -l was just waving to a friend.
-Let's go inside.
-Well, l better be running along.
lnside, major.
Well, l should be really running along now.
l want you to tell General Peterson about the genie that Major Nelson is going to marry.
Did you really say that, major? General Peterson, l love being an astronaut.
Major Nelson is not marrying any genie in any bottle.
-Well, doctor? -Don't worry, general.
This time l have a witness.
Major Nelson will tell you what Major Healey said.
Where is he? He said something about a flight to Alaska.
Sorry to interrupt your wedding day, major.
l'm sorry.
My wedding day? What are you talking about? l want you to tell General Peterson what you told me.
-About what, sir? -Did Major Healey say you were -going to marry a genie in a bottle? -l hope not.
Did you say that, Roger? -Well, l-- -Of course he said it.
You told me so yourself.
You-- You came to my office this morning and told me that he needed help.
Sir, l haven't seen you since yesterday.
You haven't seen him since yesterday? No, sir.
lt's happening to me again.
l warned you, doctor.
But, general.
Major Healey came in with frostbite.
Then he.
He was attacked by that pygmy tribe, and.
And then he-- He got a case of the bends, and then.
-lsn't that true, Major Healey? -Well, sir, l-- Never mind.
l'm going to my couch and lie down.
Well, l'm sorry to have bothered you two gentlemen.
-l hope Dr.
Bellows will be all right.
-He may be all right now but he won't be when l get through with him.
That was the narrowest escape l ever had in my life.
How can you tell Dr.
Bellows about Jeannie? How could you do that to me? Me going around? You're the one who-- -l am ready.
-Ready for what? To get married.
The judge is waiting.
Married? We've been through all this before.
l can't marry you, Jeannie.
You're a genie.
-Well, he's his old self again.
-l want his new self.
Forget about that wedding, huh? Just forget about it.
-You are sure? -Yeah, positive.
Very well.
-Jeannie! -Jeannie! -Jeannie! -Jeannie! -Jeannie! -Jeannie!
Jeannie.
Oh, Jeannie, you can come out now.
Coming, master.
-Good morning, master.
-Good morning.
-l must have overslept.
-Oh, that's all right.
Jeannie, do you remember l asked you--? To go out to lunch with me this afternoon? l remember.
Well, l'm afraid l'm not gonna be able to take you to lunch.
You do not like the way l look? Jeannie, every girl in the world should be sort of lucky to look like that.
-Do you mean that, master? -Of course l do.
But that's beside the point.
l got a letter from my Aunt Pauline in Denver this morning and some friend of hers, a Miss Gordon is arriving at Cocoa Beach this morning.
She wants me to show her around.
Would you like me to help you, master? No, l think l can take care of this myself.
Did you hurt yourself? No, no, no.
Hello.
l'm Tony Nelson.
Who are you? Oh, you must be Miss Gordon.
-l've been expecting you.
-You have been expecting me? My aunt wrote me you were coming.
Sorry l didn't hear you come in.
-Would you like some coffee? -You do not recognize me? Well, not from Aunt Pauline's description, l don't recognize you.
l was expecting someone more.
More mature.
-But-- But-- -Just call me Tony.
-What's your first name? -Jeannie.
Jeannie.
Well, l'm certainly glad to meet you, Jeannie.
How do you feel now? l never felt better in my life.
l owe Aunt Pauline a big favour.
Excuse me, please.
-Don't go away.
-Oh, no.
l will not.
-Hi.
-Hi.
Good morning, Roge.
Boy, you seem awfully happy for a Monday morning.
Yeah, l am.
Do you believe in love at first sight? Well, it happens to me almost every day.
No, l'm serious.
l really think l'm in love.
You, old Two-Feet-on-the-Ground Nelson? That's hard to believe.
l know.
lt's hard for me to believe too.
My Aunt Pauline in Denver asked me to take out a friend of hers and this friend turns out to be the most beautiful girl -l've ever seen.
-Really? -Yeah.
l can't wait for you to meet her.
-ls she here? Hi.
Well, where's the--? Where's the girl? Jeannie, this is a very good friend of mine Major Roger Healey.
Jeannie Gordon.
You are in a playful mood, aren't you? We better be getting over to the base.
Aren't you at least gonna say, '' How do you do?'' What-- What for? lt's customary when you meet someone, especially a lady.
-You have to get used to Roger.
-She is used to me.
Hey, what's going on here? l told you.
My Aunt Pauline asked me to take out Miss Gordon while she's in Cocoa Beach.
-Will you tell me what's going on? -Major Nelson explained it.
-l'm a friend of his aunt.
-Yeah, Roger-- Could l trouble you for a cup of coffee, please? Certainly.
You can trouble me for anything you want.
-l must be in the wrong house.
-Major Healey something terrible has happened.
Major Nelson hit his head and now he does not remember me.
You mean he has amnesia? Wait a minute.
He can't have amnesia.
He remembers me.
l do not understand it.
He thinks l am a complete stranger.
That's it.
His subconscious mind has blocked you out.
Oh, why would it want to do that? l suppose because it had trouble accepting you.
-You gotta blink him out of it right away.
-l tried.
-What happened? -He just blinked back at me.
Did you tell him you were the genie he found in the bottle? -No.
-Well, that's it.
Just tell him and everything will be fine.
l do not think l can do that.
-Well, why not? -Because he-- He seems to like me the way l am and l would not be surprised if he wanted to marry me.
You can't do that.
-Why not? -Because l'm not gonna let you.
l'm going out there and tell him the truth.
Jeannie! Jeannie! Jeannie! -Where's Roger? -He had to leave.
He's always in a hurry.
-How do you like your coffee? -Oh, any way that you like it.
Oh, let me do it for you.
A little bit of sugar and a little bit of cream.
How did you know? Oh, well, l-- l sensed it.
Jeannie, l hope you don't think l'm being fresh or anything but l feel as though l've known you forever.
-l feel the same way.
-Do you? How long are you planning to stay in Cocoa Beach? Oh, as long as you want me to.
Then l have a feeling you're gonna be staying here for a long, long time.
Tony? Major Healey.
Dr.
Bellows, have you seen Tony? He finished the experiment and went home.
l believe he had an engagement.
Did he say he had an engagement or was being engaged? -What? -Oh, nothing serious.
-What happened to your fingers? -Oh, it's just a little frostbite, sir.
Frostbite? ln July? -How was the South Pole? -Great if you don't mind being bitten by a lovesick penguin.
-Where's Tony? -Major Nelson is upstairs.
-Well, have you told him yet? -Oh, l could not.
l have never seen him so happy.
Besides, you know l will make him a wonderful wife.
He can't marry a genie! But he will not know that l am a genie! Yes, he will, because l'm gonna tell him.
Jeannie! Jeannie! Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
Jeannie! -Did l hear the door? -Oh, it was nothing.
Someone made a mistake.
Where would you like to go to dinner tonight? Why do we not have dinner here? l can cook for you.
-You mean you can cook too? -Oh, well, you love my cook-- Well, you will love my cooking.
l can cook all of your favourite dishes.
Oh, how would you know what my favourite dishes are? Oh, l know many things about you.
You know, l can't get over this feeling that-- That l've known you all my life.
lt seems so natural to be with you.
Oh, l am glad that you feel that way.
-l will go start dinner.
-Okay.
Tony? Oh, sir, have you seen Tony? -He just left.
l believe he went home.
-Thank you, sir.
Major what happened to your arm? Oh, nothing, sir.
l was attacked by a tribe of pygmies.
Pygmies.
ln Cocoa Beach? You're a marvellous dancer, Jeannie.
Anyone could dance with you.
l could hold you in my arms forever, Jeannie.
Jeannie.
-Do not say it.
-No, l'm gonna say it.
l love you, Jeannie.
l want to marry you.
Oh, but you do not know anything about me.
l know all l need to know about you.
l must tell you what l really am.
No, l know what you really are.
You're the only girl l've ever fallen in love with.
-Are you sure? -Positive.
Well, then-- Then it would be wrong for me not to marry you -would it not? -You mean you will? lf you wish it.
May l have a cup of coffee, please? You want a cup of coffee at a time like this? Please.
l guess l do have a few things to learn about you, don't l? -A few.
-Sure.
Hello.
l'm Francine Gordon.
l think Major Nelson's expecting me.
He was expecting you, but l do not think he's expecting you anymore because he's busy getting ready to be married.
Married? His aunt didn't tell me.
Oh, well, it was a big surprise to everyone.
l see.
Well, tell him l hope he'll be very happy.
Oh, he will be.
Very happy.
Jeannie.
-Here's your coffee.
-Coffee at a time like this? Jeannie! Jeannie! Good morning, Major Healey.
Good morning, Dr.
Bellows.
l trust you've recovered from your frostbite.
Yes, sir.
Fine-- And your wounds from the pygmy attack.
-Oh, yes, sir.
-Why are you limping? Oh, it's nothing, sir.
lt's just a slight touch of the bends, that's all.
The bends? On dry land? -Tony.
-Hi.
-Are you alone? -Yeah.
Where have you been? l've been looking for you.
Are you kidding? Where haven't l been? l've been to the South Pole, the Amazon jungle 20,000 leagues under the sea.
-What are you talking about? -Ask your friend, Jeannie.
-What's Jeannie got to do with this? -She's the one that put me there.
-Are you feeling all right? -Yeah, l guess l'm okay.
Outside of a slight case of the bends.
Oh, boy, are you in trouble.
Trouble? l haven't got a trouble in the world.
l got great news for you.
What a wonderful girl.
l feel like l've known her forever.
You could have known her for 2000 years.
Roger -we're getting married.
-Mar-- Married? -l want you to be my best man.
-l'm sorry, l can't.
-Why--? Why not? -l'll probably be in orbit by then.
-Listen.
You can't marry Jeannie.
-Why not? Because she spells her name with a G.
She is a genie.
Roger, maybe you better lie down, huh? There's no point in my lying down.
l'm gonna be taking-- l'm gonna be taking a trip here any minute.
You've gotta listen to me.
Jeannie is a genie.
-You found her on a beach in a bottle.
-l did? Yeah.
Don't you remember? The time your capsule went out of orbit and you made the crash landing.
Crash landing.
And when l landed, l-- l-- l-- -l found her in the bottle on the beach? -That's it! Since then, she's been doing crazy things to you.
Like an elephant in the bedroom, lions in the living room, floating in the air.
How could l forget something like that? -See why you can't marry Jeannie? -Of course, of course-- Astronauts can't go around marrying genies, can they? Good boy.
You don't know what a relief this is to me.
l didn't think l'd get to you in time.
She kept blinking me, sending me to far-off places.
Roger, l'll have a long talk with her -so she doesn't do that to you again.
-Thanks, Tony.
Look, l've-- l've got all this paperwork to get out.
l've gotta get it to-- To Captain Freed.
-You wait here for me.
-l'll wait here.
Major Healey thinks you're going to marry a genie in a bottle? That's right, sir.
-And are you? -Well, of course not.
There's no such thing as a genie.
You've gotta help him.
He's had some kind of a nervous breakdown.
You say he thinks this genie sent him off to the South Pole the Amazon jungles and under the sea? Yes, yes.
-lt all begins to tie in.
-Tie in with what, sir? Oh, with Major Healey's peculiar behaviour.
Oh, Major Nelson, l owe you an apology.
-What? Me, sir? -Well, l've done you an injustice.
l've been blaming all the peculiar things that have been going on around here on you and all the time it was Major Healey.
-Can you help him, sir? -Well, l'm certainly gonna try, major.
-Thank you for coming in.
-He's my best friend.
We'll do everything we can.
Thank you.
-Hi, Roge.
-Well, l'm still here.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, so l see.
How you feeling? Great.
l thought l'd be in Timbuktu by now.
Would you like to go to Timbuktu? Well, why would l wanna go to Timbuktu? Oh, l don't know.
You brought it up.
That's right.
-Can l get you something? -No, l -better be getting back to my office.
-l wouldn't leave yet.
-l have work-- -l'll take care of it.
l have a feeling Dr.
Bellows wants you to wait for him here.
Why would Dr.
Bellows want me to wait for him here? Roger, you're not a well man.
Wait a minute.
You didn't tell Dr.
Bellows what l told you, did you? l did it for your own good.
You need help.
l need help? l need-- l need-- You know what you've just done? You just got yourself thrown out of the space program -and me along with you.
-Don't get excited.
Oh, why get excited? You just tossed my whole life away.
-How could you do this to me? Me? -l did it for your own good.
You don't really believe there's a genie in a bottle? Look who's asking.
lt's your genie.
My genie? Roger, my Jeannie is a wonderful, lovely girl.
Yeah, if you don't mind getting bitten by penguins.
Roger, you're in terrible shape.
You've got to pull yourself together.
Thank heavens you're here, doctor.
l don't think we got a moment to lose.
Major Nelson tells me that you think he's getting married.
Did he say that, sir? To a genie who lives in a bottle.
ls that true? l'd rather not answer that, sir on the grounds it might incriminate me and some friends of mine.
You've gotta tell him everything.
Major Healey, this isn't a legal hearing, yet.
lt's just a preliminary psychiatric examination.
Do you think that Major Nelson is going to marry a genie? Sir, l'd rather not answer that.
He's only trying to help you.
Now answer his questions.
Okay.
Okay.
But you're gonna be in for a big surprise.
l'm waiting, Major Healey.
-Yes, sir.
-Yes, sir, what? Yes, sir, Major Nelson is going to marry a genie in the bottle.
And it serves him right! l told him not to marry a genie, but he wouldn't listen.
What will it look like, you married to a genie? -Don't get excited.
Just-- -Oh, boy.
Don't get excited.
Yeah.
-l'll handle it now, major.
-You're gonna be all right.
You're gonna be just fine.
What a best friend l picked for my best friend.
Now just lie down there on the couch.
-Lie down? -Right here.
That's it.
Here we go.
Yeah.
Here we go.
l want you to breathe deeply.
l'll be right back.
Breathe deeply.
General Peterson.
-Yes, doctor? -This is it.
-This is what? -When l tell you what's happened.
Doctor, is this about Major Nelson again? Yes, sir, and Major Healey.
Then let me warn you before you open your mouth.
lf you're wrong again, you're in trouble.
Now, what did you want to tell me? Could you wait just one moment, sir? Major Healey, l wanna be very sure.
You did say that Major Nelson is going to marry a genie in a bottle? -Yes, sir.
-That's all l want to know.
Breathe deeply.
Major Nelson is marrying a genie in a bottle? Oh, of course he's not, general.
We know there's no such thing, but Major Healey doesn't know it.
-He really believes it.
-Why, he can't believe it.
There's no doubt about it.
He admitted it.
This time l think we've gotten to the bottom of everything.
Let's go see Major Healey.
He's gone.
Oh, but don't worry, general.
We'll catch him at the wedding.
Yes, thank you, Judge Harris.
l certainly appreciate it.
No, no, we'll just have a simple wedding.
Just a moment.
Unless you'd like a more elaborate ceremony.
Oh, no, no.
A simple ceremony will be just fine.
Okay.
A simple ceremony it is.
Yes.
We'll be there in about an hour.
Right.
Thank you.
Well, that's it.
Oh, Jeannie, l have to get you a ring.
What kind would you like? What's the matter, Jeannie? l wish l could be sure that l'm doing the right thing.
-Well, you love me, don't you? -Oh, you do not know how much.
And l love you.
So of course you're doing the right thing.
-Could l have a cup of coffee? --cup of coffee? -Now? -Please.
Sure.
Sure.
Major.
-What are you doing, Major Healey? -l was just waving to a friend.
-Let's go inside.
-Well, l better be running along.
lnside, major.
Well, l should be really running along now.
l want you to tell General Peterson about the genie that Major Nelson is going to marry.
Did you really say that, major? General Peterson, l love being an astronaut.
Major Nelson is not marrying any genie in any bottle.
-Well, doctor? -Don't worry, general.
This time l have a witness.
Major Nelson will tell you what Major Healey said.
Where is he? He said something about a flight to Alaska.
Sorry to interrupt your wedding day, major.
l'm sorry.
My wedding day? What are you talking about? l want you to tell General Peterson what you told me.
-About what, sir? -Did Major Healey say you were -going to marry a genie in a bottle? -l hope not.
Did you say that, Roger? -Well, l-- -Of course he said it.
You told me so yourself.
You-- You came to my office this morning and told me that he needed help.
Sir, l haven't seen you since yesterday.
You haven't seen him since yesterday? No, sir.
lt's happening to me again.
l warned you, doctor.
But, general.
Major Healey came in with frostbite.
Then he.
He was attacked by that pygmy tribe, and.
And then he-- He got a case of the bends, and then.
-lsn't that true, Major Healey? -Well, sir, l-- Never mind.
l'm going to my couch and lie down.
Well, l'm sorry to have bothered you two gentlemen.
-l hope Dr.
Bellows will be all right.
-He may be all right now but he won't be when l get through with him.
That was the narrowest escape l ever had in my life.
How can you tell Dr.
Bellows about Jeannie? How could you do that to me? Me going around? You're the one who-- -l am ready.
-Ready for what? To get married.
The judge is waiting.
Married? We've been through all this before.
l can't marry you, Jeannie.
You're a genie.
-Well, he's his old self again.
-l want his new self.
Forget about that wedding, huh? Just forget about it.
-You are sure? -Yeah, positive.
Very well.
-Jeannie! -Jeannie! -Jeannie! -Jeannie! -Jeannie! -Jeannie!