I Dream of Jeannie (1965) s02e18 Episode Script
My Master, the Spy
[.]
You did not eat your breakfast, master.
Oh, no, I didn't have time, Jeannie.
Oh.
Will you be home for lunch? No, I can't make that either.
I have a conference this morning with General Peterson and Dr.
Bellows, and then there's some NASA officials coming down from Washington.
Oh, that is a shame.
I thought we might have lunch at a marvelous little restaurant I know of on the Left Bank.
I wish I could, but There's no, uh There's no Left Bank in Cocoa Beach.
Well, there is in Paris.
It is called Chez Moustache.
It is in a quaint little part of town, with a cobblestone street in front and people Some other day, huh? Sorry.
Ooh.
They make a marvelous cheese soufflé there.
Why don't you go there? Oh, I could not do that.
It would not be any fun without you, master.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Master? Mm-hm? Do you read French? Yeah, a little.
I I studied it in school.
Can you read this? Hm? Oh, sure.
TONY: Uh, "Je desire être a Paris".
Oh, that's easy.
Um, "I wish I were in Paris.
" [SQUEALING.]
Oh, master! [.]
I'm sorry.
I-I, uh Monsieur.
Welcome to Paris, master.
[.]
[.]
Yeah, I-I'm terribly sorry.
Jeannie, I told you, I'm supposed to be at a meeting.
Oh, please, do not be angry, master.
You must eat lunch and this was right on the way.
Right on the way to where? The Eiffel Tower? I'm due to be walking into the conference room at NASA headquarters right this minute.
Oh, that is no problem, master.
You are at NASA.
Mm.
Huh? Now, shall we order the cheese soufflé? Where's Major Nelson? Oh, he's always on time, general.
He should be here any minute, sir.
I'm sorry I'm late, sir.
Oh, Tony.
You know everybody.
Yes.
All right, let's all sit down.
Excuse me.
Got a long day ahead of us.
Are? Are you telling me that I'm at the meeting at Cape Kennedy right now? Have I ever deceived you? Well, let's not go into that.
But I don't understa How can I be here and there at the same time? Oh, that is child's play.
If you like, we could also be having lunch in Rome right now.
Oh, no.
Believe me, I'm nervous enough as it is.
Y-you're sure nothing can go wrong? Oh, believe me, master.
All that can happen is that you will have a marvelous lunch and then you can go back to work.
I'll remember everything that happens at Kennedy? Well, of course.
You are there.
I am there.
Oh, let me explain it to you.
You see, you concentrate on a polliwog No, please, please.
I might understand, don't tell me.
Really, don't.
Monsieur.
Hm? Could I help you? Oh, yes Uh, oui.
I would, um [CLEARS THROAT.]
Je desire um, um, soufflé adieu.
Adieu? Adieu.
Oh, pour deux.
Por deux.
Bon.
I-I tout suite.
[LAUGHING.]
That was very good, master.
[CHUCKLING.]
Well, I haven't used it since high school.
The primary reason I came down here myself is to let you know how excited Washington is about the potential of Operation: Galaxy.
Gentlemen, for the first time, we have a really big jump on every other country.
And we intend to keep it that way.
That's right.
Washington wants to be certain that we maintain absolute security.
Well, you can reassure Washington on that score.
Oh, yes, gentlemen.
Our security here is foolproof.
Yeah.
Once I forgot my pass and I had to spend the whole day at the beach with a blond.
[.]
Do you like it, master? Jeannie, it's the best thing I've eaten in my life, really.
Oh, did I not tell you? Yeah.
I wonder how I'm doing at the meeting.
Mm.
Brilliantly, master.
[CHUCKLING.]
Oh, good.
Look.
Isn't that the American astronaut, Major Nelson? Yes.
But what is he doing in Paris? I don't know why we were not informed of his arrival.
Maybe they sneaked him in.
It is a deliberate insult to the French air force.
De Gaulle will be furious.
Perhaps he only looks like Major Nelson.
For his sake, I hope so.
I know.
I will call my good friend, Dr.
Bellows, at NASA, and find out what marches.
Allons.
So phase three will only go off if phase two and phase one go off perfectly.
Dr.
Bellows.
Excuse me, sir, but I have a call for you from Paris.
From Paris? For me? Yes, sir.
They say it's urgent.
On line one.
Thank you.
TONY: Before we commit ourselves to any final steps.
TONY: Here's the next plan.
So phase three will take place only if phase one and phase two Dr.
Bellows here.
Dr.
Bellows, this is General Rafael.
We were wondering why we were not notified that Major Nelson was coming to Paris.
We would have been happy to have given him a reception.
Major Nelson? He's not going to Paris.
Heh, I did not say he was going to Paris, Dr.
Bellows.
He is in Paris.
But that's impossible.
He's right here.
I'm looking at him.
So am I.
Well, I don't know who you're looking at, but I can assure you that it's not Major Nelson.
Well, it's probably someone who resembles him.
Of course.
One who is wearing an American Air Force uniform, a NASA insignia and an astronaut wings? And he's in Paris now? Dans le devant my very eyes.
BELLOWS: What's he doing? He's eating a cheese soufflé.
It looks delicious.
General Rafael, I wonder if you could do something for me.
Uh, could you, uh, take a picture of the man you have there and wire me a telephoto? A picture? But? But why? Because obviously one of us is looking at an impostor.
[.]
TONY: And, uh, this system is the responsibility of Houston control.
Would you like another soufflé, master? Oh, no Jeannie.
I couldn't eat another bite.
It was just marvelous.
Why, I knew you would enjoy this.
And believe me, you will not get into any trouble.
[CHUCKLING.]
Yeah, well, that'll be a change, won't it? Uh, no, merci.
Master, if you are through, I think perhaps we should leave.
Maybe you're right.
I hate to rush, but I really have to get back and do some kind of work, don't I? [LAUGHS.]
Uh, garçon.
Monsieur.
L'addition, si vous plais.
Ah, tout suite, monsieur.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
Here it is, sir.
It's just come over the wire.
Let me see it, please.
It is Major Nelson or his double.
Operation: Galaxy.
[.]
Spies are after information on Operation: Galaxy? Yes, sir, and they're diabolically clever.
And you think that someone at Cape Kennedy is involved.
I know it.
Who is it? That's just it, sir.
I'm not sure.
Because it's either him or his double.
I can't believe it's he, so it must be his double.
And if it is his double, it would explain everything, and I mean everything.
Oh, yes, of course it would.
Is this the first time that you've come across spies, doctor? Uh, yes, sir.
Well, don't you think we need a little proof? Oh, don't worry.
I'll get all the proof I need.
[CHUCKLES.]
As, uh Soon as I find out who's who.
Yes, you do that.
Uh, thank you, sir.
[.]
Master? Yes, Jeannie.
Master, did you like that cheese soufflé? I told you I did.
It was wonderful.
Then let us move to Paris.
Move to Paris? Yes, now.
You will love living in Paris.
What are you talking about? What I? What would I possibly do in Paris? Escape.
Escape from what? Oh, master, how do you get yourself into these situations? What are you talking about? BELLOWS: In my office, please.
Hello, sir.
I'd like to, uh, talk to you a minute, Major Nelson.
It is Major Nelson, isn't it? Yes, sir.
I'm after a piece of information.
Now, we're gonna play a little game.
I'm going to ask you some questions, and you are going to answer them.
What sort of questions, sir? Oh, you'll see.
I, uh I want you to answer quickly and without thinking.
Ready? Yes, sir.
Who did Sandy Koufax pitch for? Sandy Koufax? Quickly, major.
Oh, uh, the Dodgers.
Oh.
What, uh, goes on hot dogs? Mustard, uh, relish, uh, sauerkraut What was the name of your first flight instructor? Dick Olson.
Dick Olson.
Mm.
Where was President Lincoln shot? Uh, the Ford Theater, sir.
What was the name of the first grammar school you ever attended? [STAMMERING.]
Horace Mann.
Oh.
I'll have some more questions for you later.
Uh Did you, uh, get the information you wanted to? Don't worry, major.
I'm getting it.
I'm getting it.
[.]
I think I've got a bigger one back there.
Come this way please, I'll show you.
[DOOR CLOSES.]
LOU: You look around back there.
Whatever you find, bring it in.
I think I can help you.
Well, if it isn't Shh.
No names, please.
I'm sorry.
I'm here on a very confidential mission.
What can I do for you, doc? I want to buy a listening device.
A bug.
Yes.
Uh, something that can't be detected.
You came to the right place.
I think I've got just what the doctor ordered.
See this? This little beauty? This is perfect for you.
It's so tiny.
Yeah, but that That's the beauty of it.
See, this is a magnetic microphone.
Stick it on a piece of metal, and Boom, it stays right there.
Uh, where are the wires? No wires.
You are living in the horse-and-buggy days.
See, this mic is tuned to the same frequency as this receiver, and you can listen in on a range of up to a mile.
Perfect.
I'll take it.
I sure hope you catch her.
Catch her? Yeah.
That's the way I caught my wife.
I'll wrap it up for you.
[.]
[.]
Good.
Oh.
Whoop, whoop, careful, careful.
[CHUCKLING.]
I'm sorry.
[GASPS.]
ROGER: You want to finish up those charts this afternoon? TONY: No, I'd better get home.
I have a feeling something's wrong.
You mean, uh Yeah, she popped in here with some wild story.
TONY: About me escaping to Paris.
ROGER: That is wild.
TONY: You have no idea how nervous this whole thing is making me.
I haven't had a moment's peace since I-I first got involved.
ROGER: You know what you should do? Sit down and have a nice long talk with Dr.
Bellows.
TONY [LAUGHING.]
: Yeah.
Oh, yeah, that's ROGER: I'm not kidding.
You're so nervous lately.
You need a long vacation.
No, there isn't any place I could go without being found.
Well, as long as Dr.
Bellows doesn't find out, I guess you'll be all right.
ROGER: Hey, look at that, will ya? [.]
Do you know what that looks like? That just looks like it might A beautiful day.
Uh, let's take a walk, huh? You kidding? Who wants to walk? I just discovered That exercise is the best thing in the world for you.
ROGER: I don't want to exercise.
I want A breath of fresh air.
Hi.
Hi.
That was a microphone.
You mean you knew? That's right.
Oh, I get it.
You don't want whoever's listening to know that you're on to him.
That's the idea.
Give me a dime.
That's quick thinking.
You could be a secret agent.
Do you have any idea what this means? No.
Spies on the base.
Spies? That's right.
They're probably after information on Operation: Galaxy.
And we gotta track 'em down.
Someone planted a microphone in your office? Yes, sir.
Yes, sir.
And it was about this big, sir.
It was, uh I-I know it sounds incredible that anything like this should happen on this base, sir.
It doesn't sound as incredible as you think.
This is the second espionage report I've had.
It is? Yes, Dr.
Bellows is on the trail of a spy ring.
Sir, why don't we all get together and track 'em down? Wait, I think I know how to trap whoever planted that microphone in my office.
All right.
I'll leave it to you.
There's only one thing I'll ask.
Yes, sir.
I want to be in on the kill.
[.]
Now, you remember what you're supposed to do? I don't like this.
This could be dangerous.
It's our chance to crack an espionage ring.
Just Just be natural.
Yeah, I'm going to be natural.
I'm going bowling.
Well, it's been a very successful day.
Yes, it has been a very successful day.
TONY: We have the information.
All we have to do is pass it on.
ROGER: Yes, we have the information.
Now, all we have Have to do is pass it on.
[WHISPERING INDISTINCTLY.]
[WHISPERING.]
Where are we going to meet? ROGER: Where? Where are we going to meet? TONY: You know the old warehouse near the beach? Yes, I know the old warehouse! It is near the beach.
Well, uh, we're going to meet there tonight and pass on the information to the chief.
Yes, that is a good place to pass on the information to the chief.
Uh, 3:15.
Perhaps you'd like to know what time? Oh, yes, what time? What time? [QUIETLY.]
Midnight.
Midnight.
The old warehouse.
Midnight.
[SQUEALS NERVOUSLY.]
I'll get some flashlights, we'll be on our way.
Oh, master, I must talk to you.
Not right now, Jeannie.
We have something to do.
Yeah, we got some spies to catch.
Boy, I feel just like James Bond.
Oh, please do not go out tonight, master.
It's all right.
General Peterson and his men will be there.
Do you know who they are after, master? No, no, but after tonight, whoever they are will be in jail.
Oh, dear.
Jeannie? Yeah, it will serve them right.
Oh.
And I cannot talk you out of going, master? Not a chance in the world.
Would you mind moving? I need some lights.
Then I must go with you.
That's not exactly the kind of light I had in mind.
Please let me go, master.
No, I'm afraid You must not go alone.
This is men's work, you'll stay here, no arguments.
Please! Ooh! Great.
You take that.
Please let me go, master.
No, Jeannie.
You must not go alone.
I need to be adamant, I must insist.
Please? No.
[SIGHS.]
Very well, master.
Good luck.
ROGER: Boy, you sure know how to handle her.
TONY: You just have to be firm.
[.]
[FOGHORN SOUNDING.]
Hey, there's nothing down there.
Look, dresses.
These look pretty good.
Good enough.
Let's grab 'em and get out of here.
[DOOR CREAKS.]
[WHISPERING.]
Somebody.
I'll take care of him.
[FOGHORN SOUNDING.]
THUG: Psst.
Somebody else is coming.
Let's get out of here.
It's like Grand Central Station.
It's midnight.
They should be there now.
Yeah, but what are your plans? I'll go in alone and give 'em a chance to jump me.
Good thinking.
If you want me, I'll be in the bowling alley.
Now, wait two minutes, and then come in after me.
Are you kidding? There might be a whole mob of guys in there.
Roger, don't worry.
General Peterson and his men will be here soon.
They'll be covering the place.
Hey, what time you got? I have 12:02.
I've got 12:03.
[FOGHORN SOUNDING.]
Two minutes, remember.
Yeah.
Get out of sight.
BELLOWS: Hold it, major.
Turn around.
[CROWBAR CLANGS.]
Who are you? TONY: All right, buddy, hold it.
I got you covered.
Dr.
Bellows? What are you doing here? Watch it, major! [.]
Ugh! All right, that's enough.
PETERSON: Get your hands up! Take those two men out! ROGER: Hi, fellas.
Hey! I'm not late, am I? No, it's all over, Roge.
Not quite.
I'm arresting you for espionage.
You're arresting Major Nelson for espionage? No, general.
I am not arresting Major Nelson.
I am arresting this man.
Who do you think I am? I know who you are.
You're Major Nelson's double.
Major Nelson is being held prisoner somewhere in Paris.
Why, you dirty rat! What have you done with my best friend? Roger, it's me! Oh, it's him.
Dr.
Bellows, you better explain what this is all about and fast.
I shall be very happy to, general.
I planted a microphone in Major Nelson's office.
You're the one that planted He planted the microphone Yes! You see, I know the real Major Nelson as well as I know myself.
He would never be involved in anything like this.
So I heard you making plans to pass on the secret information to your chief tonight, I knew that you were the double.
What makes you think there's a double? I don't think, general, I know.
I have the proof right here.
This picture was taken at a sidewalk café in Paris, yesterday.
Who do you think it is? PETERSON: It looks like General de Gaulle.
No, it's uh General de Gaulle.
Yes, it's a very good likeness of General de Gaulle.
PETERSON: Is there anything that you would like to say? Yes, sir.
He's done it to me again.
[.]
[.]
You did not eat your breakfast, master.
Oh, no, I didn't have time, Jeannie.
Oh.
Will you be home for lunch? No, I can't make that either.
I have a conference this morning with General Peterson and Dr.
Bellows, and then there's some NASA officials coming down from Washington.
Oh, that is a shame.
I thought we might have lunch at a marvelous little restaurant I know of on the Left Bank.
I wish I could, but There's no, uh There's no Left Bank in Cocoa Beach.
Well, there is in Paris.
It is called Chez Moustache.
It is in a quaint little part of town, with a cobblestone street in front and people Some other day, huh? Sorry.
Ooh.
They make a marvelous cheese soufflé there.
Why don't you go there? Oh, I could not do that.
It would not be any fun without you, master.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Master? Mm-hm? Do you read French? Yeah, a little.
I I studied it in school.
Can you read this? Hm? Oh, sure.
TONY: Uh, "Je desire être a Paris".
Oh, that's easy.
Um, "I wish I were in Paris.
" [SQUEALING.]
Oh, master! [.]
I'm sorry.
I-I, uh Monsieur.
Welcome to Paris, master.
[.]
[.]
Yeah, I-I'm terribly sorry.
Jeannie, I told you, I'm supposed to be at a meeting.
Oh, please, do not be angry, master.
You must eat lunch and this was right on the way.
Right on the way to where? The Eiffel Tower? I'm due to be walking into the conference room at NASA headquarters right this minute.
Oh, that is no problem, master.
You are at NASA.
Mm.
Huh? Now, shall we order the cheese soufflé? Where's Major Nelson? Oh, he's always on time, general.
He should be here any minute, sir.
I'm sorry I'm late, sir.
Oh, Tony.
You know everybody.
Yes.
All right, let's all sit down.
Excuse me.
Got a long day ahead of us.
Are? Are you telling me that I'm at the meeting at Cape Kennedy right now? Have I ever deceived you? Well, let's not go into that.
But I don't understa How can I be here and there at the same time? Oh, that is child's play.
If you like, we could also be having lunch in Rome right now.
Oh, no.
Believe me, I'm nervous enough as it is.
Y-you're sure nothing can go wrong? Oh, believe me, master.
All that can happen is that you will have a marvelous lunch and then you can go back to work.
I'll remember everything that happens at Kennedy? Well, of course.
You are there.
I am there.
Oh, let me explain it to you.
You see, you concentrate on a polliwog No, please, please.
I might understand, don't tell me.
Really, don't.
Monsieur.
Hm? Could I help you? Oh, yes Uh, oui.
I would, um [CLEARS THROAT.]
Je desire um, um, soufflé adieu.
Adieu? Adieu.
Oh, pour deux.
Por deux.
Bon.
I-I tout suite.
[LAUGHING.]
That was very good, master.
[CHUCKLING.]
Well, I haven't used it since high school.
The primary reason I came down here myself is to let you know how excited Washington is about the potential of Operation: Galaxy.
Gentlemen, for the first time, we have a really big jump on every other country.
And we intend to keep it that way.
That's right.
Washington wants to be certain that we maintain absolute security.
Well, you can reassure Washington on that score.
Oh, yes, gentlemen.
Our security here is foolproof.
Yeah.
Once I forgot my pass and I had to spend the whole day at the beach with a blond.
[.]
Do you like it, master? Jeannie, it's the best thing I've eaten in my life, really.
Oh, did I not tell you? Yeah.
I wonder how I'm doing at the meeting.
Mm.
Brilliantly, master.
[CHUCKLING.]
Oh, good.
Look.
Isn't that the American astronaut, Major Nelson? Yes.
But what is he doing in Paris? I don't know why we were not informed of his arrival.
Maybe they sneaked him in.
It is a deliberate insult to the French air force.
De Gaulle will be furious.
Perhaps he only looks like Major Nelson.
For his sake, I hope so.
I know.
I will call my good friend, Dr.
Bellows, at NASA, and find out what marches.
Allons.
So phase three will only go off if phase two and phase one go off perfectly.
Dr.
Bellows.
Excuse me, sir, but I have a call for you from Paris.
From Paris? For me? Yes, sir.
They say it's urgent.
On line one.
Thank you.
TONY: Before we commit ourselves to any final steps.
TONY: Here's the next plan.
So phase three will take place only if phase one and phase two Dr.
Bellows here.
Dr.
Bellows, this is General Rafael.
We were wondering why we were not notified that Major Nelson was coming to Paris.
We would have been happy to have given him a reception.
Major Nelson? He's not going to Paris.
Heh, I did not say he was going to Paris, Dr.
Bellows.
He is in Paris.
But that's impossible.
He's right here.
I'm looking at him.
So am I.
Well, I don't know who you're looking at, but I can assure you that it's not Major Nelson.
Well, it's probably someone who resembles him.
Of course.
One who is wearing an American Air Force uniform, a NASA insignia and an astronaut wings? And he's in Paris now? Dans le devant my very eyes.
BELLOWS: What's he doing? He's eating a cheese soufflé.
It looks delicious.
General Rafael, I wonder if you could do something for me.
Uh, could you, uh, take a picture of the man you have there and wire me a telephoto? A picture? But? But why? Because obviously one of us is looking at an impostor.
[.]
TONY: And, uh, this system is the responsibility of Houston control.
Would you like another soufflé, master? Oh, no Jeannie.
I couldn't eat another bite.
It was just marvelous.
Why, I knew you would enjoy this.
And believe me, you will not get into any trouble.
[CHUCKLING.]
Yeah, well, that'll be a change, won't it? Uh, no, merci.
Master, if you are through, I think perhaps we should leave.
Maybe you're right.
I hate to rush, but I really have to get back and do some kind of work, don't I? [LAUGHS.]
Uh, garçon.
Monsieur.
L'addition, si vous plais.
Ah, tout suite, monsieur.
[CLEARS THROAT.]
Here it is, sir.
It's just come over the wire.
Let me see it, please.
It is Major Nelson or his double.
Operation: Galaxy.
[.]
Spies are after information on Operation: Galaxy? Yes, sir, and they're diabolically clever.
And you think that someone at Cape Kennedy is involved.
I know it.
Who is it? That's just it, sir.
I'm not sure.
Because it's either him or his double.
I can't believe it's he, so it must be his double.
And if it is his double, it would explain everything, and I mean everything.
Oh, yes, of course it would.
Is this the first time that you've come across spies, doctor? Uh, yes, sir.
Well, don't you think we need a little proof? Oh, don't worry.
I'll get all the proof I need.
[CHUCKLES.]
As, uh Soon as I find out who's who.
Yes, you do that.
Uh, thank you, sir.
[.]
Master? Yes, Jeannie.
Master, did you like that cheese soufflé? I told you I did.
It was wonderful.
Then let us move to Paris.
Move to Paris? Yes, now.
You will love living in Paris.
What are you talking about? What I? What would I possibly do in Paris? Escape.
Escape from what? Oh, master, how do you get yourself into these situations? What are you talking about? BELLOWS: In my office, please.
Hello, sir.
I'd like to, uh, talk to you a minute, Major Nelson.
It is Major Nelson, isn't it? Yes, sir.
I'm after a piece of information.
Now, we're gonna play a little game.
I'm going to ask you some questions, and you are going to answer them.
What sort of questions, sir? Oh, you'll see.
I, uh I want you to answer quickly and without thinking.
Ready? Yes, sir.
Who did Sandy Koufax pitch for? Sandy Koufax? Quickly, major.
Oh, uh, the Dodgers.
Oh.
What, uh, goes on hot dogs? Mustard, uh, relish, uh, sauerkraut What was the name of your first flight instructor? Dick Olson.
Dick Olson.
Mm.
Where was President Lincoln shot? Uh, the Ford Theater, sir.
What was the name of the first grammar school you ever attended? [STAMMERING.]
Horace Mann.
Oh.
I'll have some more questions for you later.
Uh Did you, uh, get the information you wanted to? Don't worry, major.
I'm getting it.
I'm getting it.
[.]
I think I've got a bigger one back there.
Come this way please, I'll show you.
[DOOR CLOSES.]
LOU: You look around back there.
Whatever you find, bring it in.
I think I can help you.
Well, if it isn't Shh.
No names, please.
I'm sorry.
I'm here on a very confidential mission.
What can I do for you, doc? I want to buy a listening device.
A bug.
Yes.
Uh, something that can't be detected.
You came to the right place.
I think I've got just what the doctor ordered.
See this? This little beauty? This is perfect for you.
It's so tiny.
Yeah, but that That's the beauty of it.
See, this is a magnetic microphone.
Stick it on a piece of metal, and Boom, it stays right there.
Uh, where are the wires? No wires.
You are living in the horse-and-buggy days.
See, this mic is tuned to the same frequency as this receiver, and you can listen in on a range of up to a mile.
Perfect.
I'll take it.
I sure hope you catch her.
Catch her? Yeah.
That's the way I caught my wife.
I'll wrap it up for you.
[.]
[.]
Good.
Oh.
Whoop, whoop, careful, careful.
[CHUCKLING.]
I'm sorry.
[GASPS.]
ROGER: You want to finish up those charts this afternoon? TONY: No, I'd better get home.
I have a feeling something's wrong.
You mean, uh Yeah, she popped in here with some wild story.
TONY: About me escaping to Paris.
ROGER: That is wild.
TONY: You have no idea how nervous this whole thing is making me.
I haven't had a moment's peace since I-I first got involved.
ROGER: You know what you should do? Sit down and have a nice long talk with Dr.
Bellows.
TONY [LAUGHING.]
: Yeah.
Oh, yeah, that's ROGER: I'm not kidding.
You're so nervous lately.
You need a long vacation.
No, there isn't any place I could go without being found.
Well, as long as Dr.
Bellows doesn't find out, I guess you'll be all right.
ROGER: Hey, look at that, will ya? [.]
Do you know what that looks like? That just looks like it might A beautiful day.
Uh, let's take a walk, huh? You kidding? Who wants to walk? I just discovered That exercise is the best thing in the world for you.
ROGER: I don't want to exercise.
I want A breath of fresh air.
Hi.
Hi.
That was a microphone.
You mean you knew? That's right.
Oh, I get it.
You don't want whoever's listening to know that you're on to him.
That's the idea.
Give me a dime.
That's quick thinking.
You could be a secret agent.
Do you have any idea what this means? No.
Spies on the base.
Spies? That's right.
They're probably after information on Operation: Galaxy.
And we gotta track 'em down.
Someone planted a microphone in your office? Yes, sir.
Yes, sir.
And it was about this big, sir.
It was, uh I-I know it sounds incredible that anything like this should happen on this base, sir.
It doesn't sound as incredible as you think.
This is the second espionage report I've had.
It is? Yes, Dr.
Bellows is on the trail of a spy ring.
Sir, why don't we all get together and track 'em down? Wait, I think I know how to trap whoever planted that microphone in my office.
All right.
I'll leave it to you.
There's only one thing I'll ask.
Yes, sir.
I want to be in on the kill.
[.]
Now, you remember what you're supposed to do? I don't like this.
This could be dangerous.
It's our chance to crack an espionage ring.
Just Just be natural.
Yeah, I'm going to be natural.
I'm going bowling.
Well, it's been a very successful day.
Yes, it has been a very successful day.
TONY: We have the information.
All we have to do is pass it on.
ROGER: Yes, we have the information.
Now, all we have Have to do is pass it on.
[WHISPERING INDISTINCTLY.]
[WHISPERING.]
Where are we going to meet? ROGER: Where? Where are we going to meet? TONY: You know the old warehouse near the beach? Yes, I know the old warehouse! It is near the beach.
Well, uh, we're going to meet there tonight and pass on the information to the chief.
Yes, that is a good place to pass on the information to the chief.
Uh, 3:15.
Perhaps you'd like to know what time? Oh, yes, what time? What time? [QUIETLY.]
Midnight.
Midnight.
The old warehouse.
Midnight.
[SQUEALS NERVOUSLY.]
I'll get some flashlights, we'll be on our way.
Oh, master, I must talk to you.
Not right now, Jeannie.
We have something to do.
Yeah, we got some spies to catch.
Boy, I feel just like James Bond.
Oh, please do not go out tonight, master.
It's all right.
General Peterson and his men will be there.
Do you know who they are after, master? No, no, but after tonight, whoever they are will be in jail.
Oh, dear.
Jeannie? Yeah, it will serve them right.
Oh.
And I cannot talk you out of going, master? Not a chance in the world.
Would you mind moving? I need some lights.
Then I must go with you.
That's not exactly the kind of light I had in mind.
Please let me go, master.
No, I'm afraid You must not go alone.
This is men's work, you'll stay here, no arguments.
Please! Ooh! Great.
You take that.
Please let me go, master.
No, Jeannie.
You must not go alone.
I need to be adamant, I must insist.
Please? No.
[SIGHS.]
Very well, master.
Good luck.
ROGER: Boy, you sure know how to handle her.
TONY: You just have to be firm.
[.]
[FOGHORN SOUNDING.]
Hey, there's nothing down there.
Look, dresses.
These look pretty good.
Good enough.
Let's grab 'em and get out of here.
[DOOR CREAKS.]
[WHISPERING.]
Somebody.
I'll take care of him.
[FOGHORN SOUNDING.]
THUG: Psst.
Somebody else is coming.
Let's get out of here.
It's like Grand Central Station.
It's midnight.
They should be there now.
Yeah, but what are your plans? I'll go in alone and give 'em a chance to jump me.
Good thinking.
If you want me, I'll be in the bowling alley.
Now, wait two minutes, and then come in after me.
Are you kidding? There might be a whole mob of guys in there.
Roger, don't worry.
General Peterson and his men will be here soon.
They'll be covering the place.
Hey, what time you got? I have 12:02.
I've got 12:03.
[FOGHORN SOUNDING.]
Two minutes, remember.
Yeah.
Get out of sight.
BELLOWS: Hold it, major.
Turn around.
[CROWBAR CLANGS.]
Who are you? TONY: All right, buddy, hold it.
I got you covered.
Dr.
Bellows? What are you doing here? Watch it, major! [.]
Ugh! All right, that's enough.
PETERSON: Get your hands up! Take those two men out! ROGER: Hi, fellas.
Hey! I'm not late, am I? No, it's all over, Roge.
Not quite.
I'm arresting you for espionage.
You're arresting Major Nelson for espionage? No, general.
I am not arresting Major Nelson.
I am arresting this man.
Who do you think I am? I know who you are.
You're Major Nelson's double.
Major Nelson is being held prisoner somewhere in Paris.
Why, you dirty rat! What have you done with my best friend? Roger, it's me! Oh, it's him.
Dr.
Bellows, you better explain what this is all about and fast.
I shall be very happy to, general.
I planted a microphone in Major Nelson's office.
You're the one that planted He planted the microphone Yes! You see, I know the real Major Nelson as well as I know myself.
He would never be involved in anything like this.
So I heard you making plans to pass on the secret information to your chief tonight, I knew that you were the double.
What makes you think there's a double? I don't think, general, I know.
I have the proof right here.
This picture was taken at a sidewalk café in Paris, yesterday.
Who do you think it is? PETERSON: It looks like General de Gaulle.
No, it's uh General de Gaulle.
Yes, it's a very good likeness of General de Gaulle.
PETERSON: Is there anything that you would like to say? Yes, sir.
He's done it to me again.
[.]
[.]