Life with Boys (2011) s01e17 Episode Script

Fashion Faux Pas with Boys

Animals, I am surrounded by animals.
Would you at least stop grunting? Dad! What? Never mind.
Can you do that somewhere else, please? Okay, I need opinions.
Which outfit do you guys like better? Huh? I know I don't usually care what you think, but Jean-Luc DesChanel is speaking to the Fashion Design Club.
And I want to look good.
Oh.
You have no idea who he is.
No.
World-famous fashion designer and the inventor of the Gloodie.
The what? The glitter hoodie.
I am surrounded by animals.
Tell me about it.
Now just pick: the red and peach or the blue and black? Your opinions are really important to me.
Okay, boys, huddle up.
Okay.
The red and peach.
Are you sure? Totally.
Then the blue and black it is.
People across the world ask, "Jean-Luc, what was the inspiration for the Gloodie?" At first, I thought, "Big dots!" But then I thought, "Jean-Luc, you fool, that would make it a Big Doodie.
And who would buy that?" The rest is fashion history, or as I call it, Fishtory.
And I thank you, merci.
Oh, no, stop.
You're too kind.
Talk about a big head.
Stop it.
He's a genius.
Genius? Did someone say, "Genius"? I did.
Well, aren't you a little kiss-up.
I like that.
And I also like that.
That's because you designed it.
Of course I did.
It's a slipper! It's a wrap! It's a slap! Oh, I like them better than you now.
And to think, this genius, just foreign-exchange student in this very classroom, sitting at this very desk, a boy with a dream.
I was adorable! Anyway, my dream came true and I'm going to give one of you that same chance.
Anyone who thinks they have inside of them a little Jean-Luc magique has one week to design something unique, something that will knock my Shlox off.
That's my new line of sheep leather socks, coming this fall.
Ooh, sneak peek.
That's all you get.
And the winner will be allowed to observe me for one full month as my unpaid intern.
Let the games begin.
I am so totally gonna win this.
Girls, girls, that's enough.
You're getting spittle on the Slap.
Feels like I'm caught in the middle Drama comes with every new day So far to fall Walking the tightrope But I wouldn't have it any other way We're gonna put one foot in front of the other Get tripped up and step on one another We move ahead and try to keep it on track 'Cause we know we got each other's back Don't need to fight it No need to deny It's a crazy life, a random life A wonderful life This is perfect.
Jean-Luc is going to absolutely love it.
A button scarf, I like it.
But, uhh, wouldn't you have to call it a Barf? Easy for you to say.
You're not even entering the contest.
Hey, some people make designer clothes and some make them look good.
I think people are mature enough to get past the name.
"That is a nice Barf".
"Where'd you get that Barf?" "Who designed that beautiful Barf?" Now this one is definitely a winner.
It's fashion forward, totally unique, and won't make anyone feel like they're wearing vomit.
I can't wait to see the look on Jean-Luc's face when he sees it.
Which one of you Neanderthals left half a PB&J on the edge of the bathtub? Oh, sorry.
In case you missed it before: animals! Spencer, the coat rack is inches away.
What is the problem with just hanging it up? That's it.
I want all these coats upstairs now.
In a minute.
Oh, no, no, no.
I've seen your minutes.
They last for years.
Your Grandma shrunk a full inch during one of your minutes.
Fine.
Hey, my "Captain Awesome" jacket.
Wow, it's been a long time since I've had this baby on.
A very long time.
Well, I guess I can't expect a jacket you got in sixth grade to fit you forever.
Can I have it? I want it too.
I want to be Captain Awesome! Guys, it wasn't the jacket that made me awesome.
Yeah, yeah, you're the golden apple we all reach for.
Can I have it? Take my stuff upstairs and it's yours.
Sweet! Hey, babe, what's up? No, seriously? Hello? Olivia just dumped me.
Wow.
For somebody cooler.
Double wow! I know.
That hasn't happened to me since I was in the sixth grade.
Going to the mall to show off my new Captain Awesome jacket.
Of course, I'd never call it that because I'm way too cool, in my new jacket! Ciao, babies.
You don't think No, no.
Like I told you, Captain Awesome is in here.
It's not like the jacket was my good luck charm or anything.
Hey, guys, I just found This day just gets better and better.
Okay, that just blew my mind.
Like A shirt with pant legs.
I can't believe my favourite jeans had to die for this.
Well, that's the last time I come to check on you.
Maybe I should just face it.
I'm never going to be able to think like Jean-Luc.
Why do you want to think like him? Because then I would be able to design something he likes, something that makes him say, "Tess, I see in you a little Jean-Luc magique".
Why don't you come up with something you like? Then maybe he'd say, "Tess, I see in you a little Tess Foster magique".
That's sweet, Spence.
But it doesn't matter if I like it.
It only matters if he likes it.
That's just dumb.
It's not dumb.
It's life.
It's the way things work.
It's it is dumb.
Told you.
Hey, you're eight.
You're not supposed to be smarter than me.
Yeah, yeah.
If I had a dollar for every time someone in this family said that You obviously worked hard on this.
So sad.
Hmm.
There's three seconds of my life I'll never get back.
Where'd you get the inspiration for that litter box, some cat lady's closet? Oh, where'd you get yours? The bimbo department at Forever Bimbo? It doesn't really look like cat lady clothes, does it? Of course not! And the important thing is you made something you like, something you'd wear.
So, would you wear it? The important this is you made something you like, something you'd wear.
Oh, boy.
Now this, I don't hate.
But this I do! Aww.
And why? Because I didn't think of it.
It's brilliant! What? I mean, "Aww".
Speaking of brilliant, that's what you are.
We should have lunch sometime and just talk about how brilliant you are.
I like the way you think.
Never change.
Now scat.
This is young, sassy, inspired, like my new butt lift.
Sneak peek.
That's all you get.
Big announcement time.
You, blondie, you are my new intern.
Really? Yes.
You can start right now: grande mochaccino light, no whip, extra shot.
Chop, chop.
I thought you liked my design? I do! That is why I'm going to display your work this weekend in my New York show.
My design, in New York? Absolument! "A design by whatever your name is, inspired by Jean-Luc".
That is what it must say or the deal is off.
Take your time.
Okay.
Time is up! Yes! To our Tess, the next big thing in fashion design! Way to go! Aww, man, on my new vest.
Hey, I won an iPod! Hey, way To go, Sammy! Hey, Gabe! It's not the jacket.
Knock, knock.
Who's there? It's me.
Jean-Luc, what are you doing here? I have a surprise for you.
Oh, good, an audience, I love that.
You may stay.
And you may knock next time.
Oh, be nice, Jack.
Yes, I know your name.
I Googled you.
Et, maintenant Voila! Oh.
Wow.
I made a few Jean-Luc tweaks.
You may shower me with compliments now.
I love it! I hate it! Wow, that looks completely different from what you did.
It sure does! And it's stunning.
I'm stunned just looking at it.
Sorry, we just had root beer floats.
Root beer floats? Why is there not one in my mouth right now? Now look, Gene-Luck Whoa, Dad.
Uhh, would you like a root beer float? It's like we are the same person, except you are freakishly tall.
Seriously, you can see right up your nose.
B-T-dubs, you should trim those nose hairs.
It's, like, waving at me.
"Hello, Jean-Luc.
" Would it be rude if we hid in our rooms till the whack job was gone? It absolutely would be.
Out of my way.
This isn't my design anymore.
I can't let him take it to New York and put my name on it.
Jean-Luc? Oh, I almost forgot.
You're coming to New York with me.
On the other hand, he understands high fashion and I don't.
You want to take my daughter to New York? Of course! When I present her dress to the world, she should be by my side, or perhaps slightly behind, gazing up at me with silent admiration.
I'm sorry, I'm still on, "You want to take my daughter to New York?" Oh, and F.
Y.
I.
, your daughter really wants to go.
Tess, this is a big decision.
In this family, we don't rush big decisions.
We need time to talk about this.
But there is no time.
There is no time! I need to know now.
He needs to know now! Okay, everybody needs to know now? Then now, the answer is no.
You're not going to New York.
Enjoy your root beer float.
Dad, that is so unfair! Yeesh, tall guy is testy.
What are you getting so mad about? You want to talk? Let's talk.
I'll say, "I want to go.
" You say, "Yes.
" That's a nice talk, isn't it? Honey, I know this all sounds like some kind of dream come true.
But is this really the dream you want? I mean, you hate what he did to your dress.
Okay, I admit, at first, I did hate it.
But that's only because I have so much to learn.
Now, I only kind of hate it.
And in an hour, I'm optimistic that I will only dislike it.
That's called growth, Dad.
That is called maturity.
That's called something we put on the lawn twice a year.
Tessie, your dress was great the way it was.
You think everything I do is great, but you know me.
I'm always trying to improve in anything I do.
And this is an opportunity to learn from the best.
Are you sure about this? That's me giving in.
No, but if I don't try, I will always wonder.
That's me winning.
Thanks, Dad.
You got it.
What are we laughing about? Sorry about your yearbook picture.
What are you talking about? My class picture is awesome.
I'm talking about the one on page 93.
Ah! I was scratching! Sure you were.
Gabe, you're never going to believe it.
That cute girl from French class just asked me out! I said, "Oui!" Give me back my jacket.
My mojo is in there and I want it back.
What? Just give it! Stop it! It's mine, all mine! Just give me back my jacket! Judge Judy's going to be hearing about this one! Tess Foster, ten minutes.
Are you sure you're okay with all this, Tessie? Of course I'm okay.
I mean, why wouldn't I be okay? There are only 2,000 people out there, plus the press.
I'm only about to be judged and dissected by the elite of the fashion elite.
Why would I be nervous about that? Okay, maybe I'm a little nervous.
Well, that's understandable.
I mean, not only are you going out there in front of thousands of people, but you're showing off a dress that's not completely yours.
I mean, it's not even semi-completely yours.
I mean, there's barely anything left of the original Not working.
Excuse me, one of your genetic brood is sneezing caviar out of his nose into a napkin, saying, "Look, my brains are coming out!" And that's not funny at all.
Spencer! Okay.
I can do this.
I can do this.
Of course you can.
Just be yourself, you know, with a few Jean-Luc tweaks.
So, how do you feel? To be honest, I am not completely comfortable going out there like this.
You're just a little nervous.
Now, close your eyes and find that calm inner centre of peace and tranquility.
Okay, two minutes for final touches! Wow, honey, people are not going to believe you.
They're not? Why, did someone say something? No, I meant your story: brilliant young talent discovered by a big designer and all that.
Oh, right, that.
Yeah, I have a hard time believing it myself sometimes.
Sorry, it's my little girl.
Hey, pumpkin, Mommy's working.
Is it important? No, I haven't forgotten to get her autograph.
I forgot.
Can I get your autograph? She wants my autograph? She wants to be a designer and you're, like, her new hero.
Her hero? Can I talk to her, Mom? Please, please, please? Would you mind? Actually, I I'll put her on face time.
Would be delighted.
I can't believe I'm actually talking to you.
I mean, you're only four years older than me and you came up with a dress all on your own.
Well And now you're going to become famous for it: your very own dress.
Yeah, umm That you designed all by yourself, alone, with nobody else.
That's so awesome.
When you give me your autograph, could you write, "To Fiona, never give up on your dreams and always listen to your own heart.
" That's what my Mom says.
You had to say that, didn't you? So, is my little discovery ready to show her dress off to the world? I sure am.
But this isn't my dress.
And I can't take credit for something that I didn't do.
That wouldn't be listening to my heart.
And that's what all great designers do.
Right, Fiona? Right.
What am I supposed to do now? Think, Jean-Luc, think.
Ow.
Who better to model a Jean-Luc creation than Jean-Luc? And I thank you.
Merci.
Sorry, Jean-Luc, but that's one sneak peek this girl can live without.
Tess! Spencer! Dinner in ten! Dad, would you please ask Mr.
Give-Me-Back-The-Jacket, Wah-Wah-Wah" to move so I can get the plates? Dad, would you please tell the Mojo Stealer that I will move when I'm finished getting the glasses? This is ridiculous.
You two are going to start talking to each other again and that's it.
It's just a stupid jacket that is now a dog bed for Walter.
But it was No, no.
I'm telling you, there is no such thing as a lucky jacket.

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