Metalocalypse (2006) s02e09 Episode Script
Dethcarraldo
The Yaneemango Indians.
live in the most remote parts of the Amazon jungle.
What are we watching here? Why are we watching this? I'm watching it! Change the channel! - Pickles, play it! - Yeah, I will.
TOKl: No, no, that's rewind! - That's too fars! - Play it! Looks at them.
They can't even skeak Spenglish.
You guys, shut up and get out of here.
You know? Get out! This is interesting to me, so leave it! I'm one-fourth Yaneemango.
use a hallucinogenic drug called Yopo.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! What did that guy say? Rewind.
Play.
Yaneemango use a hallucinogenic drug called Yopo.
Yopo? Am I saying that right Yopo? the nasal cavities by means of a long pipe.
Dude, that's awesome! I've never heard of that.
The Yaneemango achieve a trancelike state I got to try that stuff.
You really don't.
communicate with the spirit world with drumbeats.
We wondered how the Yaneemango would react to hearing.
the world's most popular art form, Dethklok.
# Do you folks like coffee? # Dude, there's so much information about this drug, Yopo.
Dude, it says in here that the people who take it.
turn into their ancient animal form.
Dude, that's that's pretty metal.
Oh, that's awesome.
Let me s Hey, Pickle, what would I turn into? Whoa, whoa, whoa.
What do you think I would turn into? Your breath smells.
Murderface: What? No, what would I turn into? Okay, just back off.
Stop breathing over my shoulder.
Just tell me what animal I would turn into and I'll leave you alone, but make it really cool.
Get out of here! - Snow beast.
- Go get out of here.
I can't stop breathing out of my nose.
Let's look at some other books.
Oh! Oh, this here says that the Paos Ferro's woods.
in the Brazilians forest.
is what's yous could totally makes guitars out of.
I'm totally goings to do that.
Oh, I'm totally goings to do thats, too.
Tokis, why's yous gots to copies me all the times? I don'ts copies yous all the times.
Oh, yes, you does.
Why can't not I have one thing that am mine's? Hey, bud, what do you got going on there? Nothing, just Hey, why don't you brush your teeth, man stop breathing in people's faces? I ain't brushing my teeth in the library.
That's ridiculous.
I'm just reading about my grandmother.
It's pretty brutal.
It's a diary of her trip to the Amazon.
We were shipwrecked late last night.
Most of our crew was crushed by the rocks.
The rest were speared and eaten by the Yaneemango.
My beloved Walter still, as far as I know, is alive.
Day 13 I have fallen in lust with Oto.
We are powerful together.
Day 24 After eating with the Yaneemango I notice Walter's pocket watch in my soup.
I realized I had eaten the soup of my beloved husband.
Ate her husband in a soup? Boy, that's totally cannibal corpse.
We're going to the Amazon.
# Do anything for Dethklok # # Do anything for Dethklok # # Do anything for Dethklok # # Do anything for Dethklok # # Dethklok! Dethklok! Dethklok! Dethklok! # He's here.
General Crozier, thank you for coming.
What's this all about? Like you, we are very concerned about this Amazon trip and we feel we need someone on the ground.
to take action in case something out of the ordinary occurs.
I can have my men mobilized in 24 hours.
We already have my best soldiers set to accompany you.
With all due respect, I would prefer to use mine.
Surely you understand the importance.
of keeping an eye on you, too, General Crozier.
Prepare to leave at once.
Gives to me this waterproofs guitars trunks.
and makes sures it can floats.
And gives to me waterproof guitars.
which shoots out bugs repellant.
Gives to me magic gloves whats can makes my hands fly.
Oh, gives to me opposites werewolves.
that turns to humans when the moons comes out.
Gives to me the swords that glows.
that shows me which way that is north.
Oh, gives to me a battle-axe which shows me which way south.
Stops copies me.
You stops copy me.
Stops copies me.
You stops copies me.
Stop copies me.
Oh, oh, wait, and get some bait.
You get pretty big fish down there.
Better get some big worms and get you know what? Get snakes.
Snakes are the biggest worms out there.
I'm sure there'll be plenty of snakes down there.
It's the Amazon.
There you go penny-pinching again.
Both: Stops copies me.
Stops copies me.
Stops copies me.
Oh, this is this is just awesome a choice assortment of jerky sweet-bean spice What the Close your mouth when you talk, please.
Fine, I'll starve! Then I'll be eating my crocodile I can't even understand you, you little jerk.
you! You understand that? Both: Stops copies me.
Stops copies me.
Stops copies me.
Maybe an entire expedition isn't worth it.
Couldn't we just send them some hoodies.
It's always hoodies with you.
Will you will you just pay the bill? Stops copies me.
Did you know there's an Amazonian catfish.
that can swim up your pee and lay eggs in your ding dong? Okay, that's it.
I'm done eating, all right? Just Ugh! It's gross! You can mock me, but watch out when you pee! Just back off a little, all right? This a horrible combination.
of beef-jerky breath and repulsive information, okay? I'm not interested.
Fine, but you've been warned.
You've been warned, Pickles! Deth One to Hell Hammer.
All clear? Hell Hammer to Deth One.
All clear.
That's not supposed to be there! Aah! Clear landing zone.
Cease fire! Cease fire! Check it out! Check out your left! Reload! Reload! Come on! Let's go! Fire! Release Deth boat.
That's it, just get some of the good jungle air.
Ahh, wind just whistling through.
Hey, I makes everyone sandwiches.
Pbht! Ohh, Murderface! What's going ohh, man! Murderface, what is wrong with you? Oh, my god.
You are so repressed! It's got nothing to do with repressed! Hey, how about this? I solve the problems.
Put your shirts backs on! Look at your wiener.
What? It's disgusting.
You know, it's all gnarled.
It looks like you stuck it in a hornet's nest or something.
I happen to play bass with it! It's callous buildup! What is this? It's like Amazon boat church or something! Can I please just take a leak before I pull my shorts up? Can I do that? Fine, go ahead, but just promise to never do that again.
Ahh! Oh, now I can see your ass! Disgusting! It looks like cottage cheese! Just let me do this.
Quick questions do you shave yours ass 'cause.
there's lots of stubbles goings on there.
Uh, quick answer you! Work out or something.
Look at your ass.
Ahh! It's a problem area.
Aah! I'm sorry, master but this river is too narrow to boat over.
I'm afraid we're going to have to abandon the gear and No, we're not gonna abandon the gear.
We'll pull the boat over that mountain.
You heard him! Get to work! All: Aah! My people.
Hey, what do you think they plan on doing with us? Hopefully they will rapes us with thems womens.
What if they kills us? Doesn't anyone want to know how I'm doing? Don't kill me! L- I'm pregnant with parasites! I have to live! They depend on me.
They can't kills me because.
there are little goofball dildos dependings on me.
to plays the billions more notes on the guitars.
And they can't kills me, neither 'cause I gots a millions little goofball dildos You know what? Go ahead and kills me.
Go aheads and kills me, too.
I says it first, and yous repeats it after me! Stops copies me! I says it first, and you repeats me! Both: Stops copies me! Stops copies me! Stops copies me! Get ready.
Something's about to happen.
Oh! Oh, dude! They're getting Yopo! Dude, if we're gonna die, we're gonna die high! Yopo! Yopo! # I track my history # # Bloody burned family tree # # Native blood runs in me # # Murderous tendencies # # Keep bloodlust away # # Keep violence at bay # # Can't deny genetics # # Cannibal DNA # # Go perpetuate # # Go procreate # # Ensure homicide # # Keep bloodlines alive # # Our children will regress # # And hunger for the flesh # # They can't be controlled # # They hunger for your soul tonight # Ravenwood: Beware.
General.
General Crozier you are dead.
live in the most remote parts of the Amazon jungle.
What are we watching here? Why are we watching this? I'm watching it! Change the channel! - Pickles, play it! - Yeah, I will.
TOKl: No, no, that's rewind! - That's too fars! - Play it! Looks at them.
They can't even skeak Spenglish.
You guys, shut up and get out of here.
You know? Get out! This is interesting to me, so leave it! I'm one-fourth Yaneemango.
use a hallucinogenic drug called Yopo.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! What did that guy say? Rewind.
Play.
Yaneemango use a hallucinogenic drug called Yopo.
Yopo? Am I saying that right Yopo? the nasal cavities by means of a long pipe.
Dude, that's awesome! I've never heard of that.
The Yaneemango achieve a trancelike state I got to try that stuff.
You really don't.
communicate with the spirit world with drumbeats.
We wondered how the Yaneemango would react to hearing.
the world's most popular art form, Dethklok.
# Do you folks like coffee? # Dude, there's so much information about this drug, Yopo.
Dude, it says in here that the people who take it.
turn into their ancient animal form.
Dude, that's that's pretty metal.
Oh, that's awesome.
Let me s Hey, Pickle, what would I turn into? Whoa, whoa, whoa.
What do you think I would turn into? Your breath smells.
Murderface: What? No, what would I turn into? Okay, just back off.
Stop breathing over my shoulder.
Just tell me what animal I would turn into and I'll leave you alone, but make it really cool.
Get out of here! - Snow beast.
- Go get out of here.
I can't stop breathing out of my nose.
Let's look at some other books.
Oh! Oh, this here says that the Paos Ferro's woods.
in the Brazilians forest.
is what's yous could totally makes guitars out of.
I'm totally goings to do that.
Oh, I'm totally goings to do thats, too.
Tokis, why's yous gots to copies me all the times? I don'ts copies yous all the times.
Oh, yes, you does.
Why can't not I have one thing that am mine's? Hey, bud, what do you got going on there? Nothing, just Hey, why don't you brush your teeth, man stop breathing in people's faces? I ain't brushing my teeth in the library.
That's ridiculous.
I'm just reading about my grandmother.
It's pretty brutal.
It's a diary of her trip to the Amazon.
We were shipwrecked late last night.
Most of our crew was crushed by the rocks.
The rest were speared and eaten by the Yaneemango.
My beloved Walter still, as far as I know, is alive.
Day 13 I have fallen in lust with Oto.
We are powerful together.
Day 24 After eating with the Yaneemango I notice Walter's pocket watch in my soup.
I realized I had eaten the soup of my beloved husband.
Ate her husband in a soup? Boy, that's totally cannibal corpse.
We're going to the Amazon.
# Do anything for Dethklok # # Do anything for Dethklok # # Do anything for Dethklok # # Do anything for Dethklok # # Dethklok! Dethklok! Dethklok! Dethklok! # He's here.
General Crozier, thank you for coming.
What's this all about? Like you, we are very concerned about this Amazon trip and we feel we need someone on the ground.
to take action in case something out of the ordinary occurs.
I can have my men mobilized in 24 hours.
We already have my best soldiers set to accompany you.
With all due respect, I would prefer to use mine.
Surely you understand the importance.
of keeping an eye on you, too, General Crozier.
Prepare to leave at once.
Gives to me this waterproofs guitars trunks.
and makes sures it can floats.
And gives to me waterproof guitars.
which shoots out bugs repellant.
Gives to me magic gloves whats can makes my hands fly.
Oh, gives to me opposites werewolves.
that turns to humans when the moons comes out.
Gives to me the swords that glows.
that shows me which way that is north.
Oh, gives to me a battle-axe which shows me which way south.
Stops copies me.
You stops copy me.
Stops copies me.
You stops copies me.
Stop copies me.
Oh, oh, wait, and get some bait.
You get pretty big fish down there.
Better get some big worms and get you know what? Get snakes.
Snakes are the biggest worms out there.
I'm sure there'll be plenty of snakes down there.
It's the Amazon.
There you go penny-pinching again.
Both: Stops copies me.
Stops copies me.
Stops copies me.
Oh, this is this is just awesome a choice assortment of jerky sweet-bean spice What the Close your mouth when you talk, please.
Fine, I'll starve! Then I'll be eating my crocodile I can't even understand you, you little jerk.
you! You understand that? Both: Stops copies me.
Stops copies me.
Stops copies me.
Maybe an entire expedition isn't worth it.
Couldn't we just send them some hoodies.
It's always hoodies with you.
Will you will you just pay the bill? Stops copies me.
Did you know there's an Amazonian catfish.
that can swim up your pee and lay eggs in your ding dong? Okay, that's it.
I'm done eating, all right? Just Ugh! It's gross! You can mock me, but watch out when you pee! Just back off a little, all right? This a horrible combination.
of beef-jerky breath and repulsive information, okay? I'm not interested.
Fine, but you've been warned.
You've been warned, Pickles! Deth One to Hell Hammer.
All clear? Hell Hammer to Deth One.
All clear.
That's not supposed to be there! Aah! Clear landing zone.
Cease fire! Cease fire! Check it out! Check out your left! Reload! Reload! Come on! Let's go! Fire! Release Deth boat.
That's it, just get some of the good jungle air.
Ahh, wind just whistling through.
Hey, I makes everyone sandwiches.
Pbht! Ohh, Murderface! What's going ohh, man! Murderface, what is wrong with you? Oh, my god.
You are so repressed! It's got nothing to do with repressed! Hey, how about this? I solve the problems.
Put your shirts backs on! Look at your wiener.
What? It's disgusting.
You know, it's all gnarled.
It looks like you stuck it in a hornet's nest or something.
I happen to play bass with it! It's callous buildup! What is this? It's like Amazon boat church or something! Can I please just take a leak before I pull my shorts up? Can I do that? Fine, go ahead, but just promise to never do that again.
Ahh! Oh, now I can see your ass! Disgusting! It looks like cottage cheese! Just let me do this.
Quick questions do you shave yours ass 'cause.
there's lots of stubbles goings on there.
Uh, quick answer you! Work out or something.
Look at your ass.
Ahh! It's a problem area.
Aah! I'm sorry, master but this river is too narrow to boat over.
I'm afraid we're going to have to abandon the gear and No, we're not gonna abandon the gear.
We'll pull the boat over that mountain.
You heard him! Get to work! All: Aah! My people.
Hey, what do you think they plan on doing with us? Hopefully they will rapes us with thems womens.
What if they kills us? Doesn't anyone want to know how I'm doing? Don't kill me! L- I'm pregnant with parasites! I have to live! They depend on me.
They can't kills me because.
there are little goofball dildos dependings on me.
to plays the billions more notes on the guitars.
And they can't kills me, neither 'cause I gots a millions little goofball dildos You know what? Go ahead and kills me.
Go aheads and kills me, too.
I says it first, and yous repeats it after me! Stops copies me! I says it first, and you repeats me! Both: Stops copies me! Stops copies me! Stops copies me! Get ready.
Something's about to happen.
Oh! Oh, dude! They're getting Yopo! Dude, if we're gonna die, we're gonna die high! Yopo! Yopo! # I track my history # # Bloody burned family tree # # Native blood runs in me # # Murderous tendencies # # Keep bloodlust away # # Keep violence at bay # # Can't deny genetics # # Cannibal DNA # # Go perpetuate # # Go procreate # # Ensure homicide # # Keep bloodlines alive # # Our children will regress # # And hunger for the flesh # # They can't be controlled # # They hunger for your soul tonight # Ravenwood: Beware.
General.
General Crozier you are dead.