Milo Murphy's Law (2016) s01e16 Episode Script
Time Out
1 [TITLE MUSIC.]
# Look at that sun Look at that sky # # Look at my sweater vest I look so fly # # Look at that mailbox Look at that tree # # It's about as beautiful as it can be # # Whoa # Today is gonna be exceptional Never boring even for a minute # It's my world and we're all livin' in it # # Whoa, whoa # Never boring even for a minute # It's my world and we're all livin' in it # MARCUS: Thanks again for inviting us, Martin.
It's good getting to know people in town.
- Glad you came along.
Should be fun.
- I hope so.
I'm a little nervous about heading out in a sinkable vessel - with both Milo and Milo's dad.
- [CHUCKLES.]
Oh, son.
Every time he comes home with a rip in his jeans or covered in "Pterodactyl blood," he credits it to some Murphy family curse.
[CHUCKLING.]
- Yeah.
- Mr.
Underwood, I can assure you that Murphy's Law is real.
But I'm sure everything will work out okay.
Then why do we have 11 life jackets for the four of us? Mathematically, it gives three of us two-and-a-half second chances.
ZACK: Well, that's quasi-comforting, I guess.
Hey, I'll catch up.
I'm gonna get some snacks.
Four bags of pistachios please.
Hey, it's you again.
The kid from the opera.
Oh, yeah, and at the Doctor Zone premiere too, right? I'm Milo.
Milo Murphy.
Vinnie Dakota.
Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you.
What a coincidence.
And thanks for the pistachios.
Yeah, a coincidence [EXCLAIMS.]
A swordfish in fresh water? This is it! From headquarters.
[EXCLAIMS.]
Where is the cart? - Well, there was this swordfish - In freshwater? I know, right? Never mind that.
Our new assignment.
- Every time I see that kid - "Wait for the container ship from Tunisia" Ooh, Tunisia.
Sounds exotic.
"And protect the pistachios.
" You know, I was aware that this was not the most glamorous of assignments, but dagnabit! I didn't study time travel for 20 cycles to end up as a blasted nut cart operator.
I joined up to save the world.
I joined up to prevent the Mississippi Purchase.
- You, you mean the Louisiana Purchase? - You're welcome.
This will not stand.
Prepare yourself, Dakota.
It's time to call the future.
Let's see.
What was that number? Ah, yes.
It was four.
Mmm-hmm.
- Battery is dead.
- I may know somebody with an inter-temporal communicator.
Come on.
Whoops! [SQUAWKING.]
- See? - Oh, that's not a curse.
That's just inexperienced casting.
Lemme show you.
Nice and easy.
You see? - Isn't this freshwater? - And so it begins [MUSIC.]
- DAKOTA: Here we are.
- So, you're telling me that there is an inter-temporal communicator here? - Yeah.
- At this party? Hey, look, piggies in a blanket.
There.
Over there.
CAVENDISH: Brick and Savannah.
Of course! Fellow time travelers.
They'll have one.
Ugh, what are they doing here? Brick, Savannah, normally I wouldn't ask this of you but it seems that the batteries on my - Wait a moment.
You get tuxedos? - Yes.
And you get high school theater costumes? Hey, it's all the past.
We decided to go with the '70s.
Yes, but one of you is from the 1970s and one from the 1870s.
Really? Which one am I? Look, we're kind of in a pinch here.
See, there was this swordfish, and when we tried to use the battery it was dead.
The battery, not the swordfish.
So we're just wondering if it would be possible for us to use your - They're on the move.
- Copy that.
Hey! Why don't we get earpieces? We're standing right next to each other.
- Yeah, so were they! - Oh, come on.
But be sure to add a little margarine to the butter.
- That way it won't burn.
- Yeah? [GRUNTS.]
Wait! So when do I add the flour? [BOTH GRUNTING.]
[CHUCKLES SMUGLY.]
[GROANS.]
Well, you got to admit this is a much cooler mission than we have.
DAKOTA: Oh, look at that.
It's like a pen key.
[BEEPING.]
DAKOTA: Spiffy.
Oh, now he's an art lover.
Ooh, secret panel for hidden safes.
Oh, come on! They get all the good stuff.
Look, if it's not too much trouble, we would like to borrow your inter-temporal communicator.
It's extremely important.
[IMITATING.]
"Oh, extremely important.
" Important is saving the world, preserving the future, stopping World War 5.
What happened to World War 3 and 4? - You're welcome.
- Nice.
Say, you think it's possible that a guy like me and a girl like you [GROANS.]
You know, all this does is make me like you more.
- Got it.
- Lars, bring the car around.
CAVENDISH: Your time vehicle is a limousine? Of course.
What do you have? [STAMMERS.]
Well, you know.
It's just It's just different.
[CHITTERING.]
BRICK: Next stop, Dr.
Grueber's lab, October 1983.
Finally, a bite! Hey! [GRUNTS.]
Whoa! [GRUMBLES.]
Yeah, okay.
Murphy's Law, real thing.
Maybe we should try another spot.
Oh, the humanity! [SCREAMS.]
So, how was your fishing, Dolores? [MOTOR WHIRS.]
Good girl.
Don't worry.
We've always got a backup plan.
MARTIN: There.
You see? ZACK: Whatever can go wrong MILO: Will go wrong.
You know, you really shouldn't mix your South American and your African cichlids.
I made that mistake once.
Cost me $34.
I don't see why you lot get all the good stuff.
Where's my limo? Where's my fish tank? - Where's my attractive partner? - Hey! I'm sitting right here.
Look, Cavendish, you're barely even agents.
You are the lowest of low-level government employees, paired together because no one else will have you.
You were given the most inconsequential mission possible, to save the pistachio, a green nut, only because our boss liked them when he was a kid, before they became extinct.
So, if you don't want to lose your jobs altogether, you better get back to work and make darn sure the pistachio survives until 2085! Now hold on just one minute! [EXCLAIMING.]
Please tell me it didn't just go into the water system.
It went into the water system.
Do you have any idea what you've just done?! [RUMBLING.]
[ROARING.]
CAVENDISH: Your time vehicle is a limousine? Of course.
What do you have? [STAMMERS.]
Well, you know.
It's just It's just different.
You know what? - Let's just get in the car.
- SAVANNAH: Oh no, you don't.
- You're not getting in that car again.
- Why? What? You already went back in time with us once and screwed everything up.
Don't worry.
We went back and fixed it.
But there's no way we're letting you go muck it up again.
You look great in that dress, by the way.
- You've been working out.
- You know I have.
Wait.
We're time travel agents just like you.
- Why do we not get - We don't have time to explain this again.
Talk to the boss.
[BEEPING.]
Cavendish? What do you want? Mr.
Block, sir! We were hoping to get a different assignment.
One more saving-the-world based and less nut related.
Well, I'm looking at this can of mixed nuts and, hmm, I don't see any pistachios.
You two were given the most inconsequential assignment we could find and you still always manage to muck that up.
So, until I see some green nuts in this can, you're on pistachio duty.
Now, get back to work! Their limo smells like peppermint.
MILO: We can use these scuba tanks to propel the ship.
One on starboard, one on port, - so that way we can steer.
- Knock on wood.
[WHOOSHING.]
- You gotta be kidding me! - See? See? [ALL SCREAM.]
- Well, at least we're moving now.
- Now you believe me? We're heading straight for that container ship from Tunisia! And the steering wheel's broken.
Hang on, Dad.
I've got an idea.
Look on the bright side.
My entire career has been one big inconsequential joke.
Where is the bright side? The pistachio shipment is here and unharmed.
Here, Dad.
Wrap this around the steering column.
Come on, guys.
Everybody, lean! [CREAKING.]
Come on, Dad.
[BOTH GRUNTING.]
Milo, it's working.
Comin' in hot.
Everyone hold on! Hey, at least it can't get any worse.
[SCREAMING.]
[ALL SCREAMING.]
- May I take your order? - Who's hungry? Yeah, I could eat.
That's that Milo Murphy I was telling you about.
Every time our pistachios get ruined, he's there.
- Every time.
- No.
And he almost took out the shipment just then.
That's preposterous.
Whoa! - See? - But that would mean [GASPS.]
He's trying to stop us.
He's trying to ruin our mission! Dakota, what we are doing here is not inconsequential.
If it's important enough to send a counter-agent, it must be vital.
Hey, now, you're getting a little We are not just nut-guarding nobodies.
We are secret-spy somebodies with our very own counter agent.
Well, I guess things are looking up.
Just look at him over there, plotting our demise.
I sure love cheese fries.
Oh, this is not over, Milo Murphy.
Not by a long shot.
They're fries with cheese! [CHOMPS.]
# It's my world and we're all livin' in it # The school needs these for the clothing donation drive by tomorrow.
So, we've got to make some tough decisions.
- Hey, where's Melissa today? - She said she had to study.
Out, boy! Those are all clean.
- Well, not anymore.
- Hmm.
Remind me.
What happened to these platypus pajamas? [SCREAMS.]
Hot chocolate.
No, I mean, why are they teal? Aren't platypuses brown? Someone's idea of "artsy.
" Diogee, out! [DOG WHIMPERS.]
I better store them someplace safe until tomorrow.
- Away from Diogee.
- Oh, yeah.
It's Diogee that causes all the problems around here.
Mom, I'm storing the giveaways in your closet to keep them away from Diogee.
BRIGETTE: Tuna casserole.
But not until six! [PANTING.]
Did you know that "donation" comes from the Latin word "donare" meaning "to give"? Nobody cares, Jim.
Here you go, sir.
Sorry, clothes only.
Suitcase donations are on Tuesdays.
- [SCREAMS.]
You didn't! - Didn't what? Give away Mom's collection of rock concert T-shirts! Uh-oh.
Her shirts must've fallen in by mistake.
We got to get them back now, guys! - Those T-shirts are important to Mom.
- How do you know that? These T-shirts are so important to me.
I don't believe that was a real conversation.
Oh, right.
You're guys.
You don't talk about your feelings.
Well, not our feelings about clothes.
Well, we've got to get them back, because Mom and Dad are going to an '80s party and she's planning on wearing her vintage swag, tonight! - In one hour! - She hasn't worn them in years, and we lost them one hour before she needs them? - What are the odds? - Even money.
Yep, even money.
[DOORBELL TINKLES.]
- Mr.
Drako, what are you doing here? - I volunteer on weekends.
You can find the coolest stuff.
Look, a black cape, like I'm a superhero that's evil.
[LAUGHS EVILLY.]
Um, Mr.
Drako, I accidentally donated some of my mom's favorite T-shirts.
- Do you think we could get them back? - Hmm Flea infested underwear, flea infested socks, flea infested mattress.
Oh, here we go! T-shirts! Oh, I'm sorry, Milo.
We ran out of space for the vintage T-shirts.
So, I sent them on to the mulching center.
[YELLING.]
Mulching center?! Yes, they're mulched and shredded, and the material is used to make replicas of vintage T-shirts.
You look like you're about to scream.
Well, if you do, please take it outside.
[DOORBELL TINKLES.]
[ALL SCREAM.]
Yeah, they were about to scream.
- Dakota, enter the password.
- All right.
[BEEPING.]
P-A-S-S-W-O-R-D.
The password is "password"? No, it's "drowssap" backwards.
- "Drowssap"? - Drowssap.
- It's my mother's maiden name.
- Ah.
And it's backwards, so, you know, no one will guess it.
- No one will guess that.
- Yeah, security.
Well done [BEEPING.]
Dakota, Cavendish.
Here are today's pistachio protecting coordinates.
[MACHINE PRINTING.]
I have complete confidence in your abilities.
Don't bungle this assignment like every other one.
Best of luck.
Yes! The zoo! We get to see actual live animals and - Dreadfully happy for you.
- Happy for "us"! We're going to the zoo We're going to the zoo And then we're gonna see some animals Come on.
Join in.
You know you want it.
# We're going to the zoo We're going to the zoo # # And then we're gonna see some animals # - It's going to be a very long day.
- Yeah, hopefully.
[ALL PANTING.]
It's the donation trailer! [AIR HISSING.]
Oh, the back tire? That's my favorite tire! Stash your bike.
Here comes the bus! No problem.
We follow the truck to the mulching center, grab the shirts and we're gold! - [SCOFFS.]
Piece of cake.
- Easy-peasy.
- No sweat.
- In the bag.
- Done deal.
- The crow flies in square circles.
What? I thought we were just saying things.
[TIRES SCREECHING.]
Stop the bus! [TIRES SCREECHING.]
MILO: No time to lose! [WHIRRING.]
Too low.
A little higher, please.
[ALL PANTING.]
ZACK: I'm not used to running after things.
I'm used to things running after us! Yeah, see? See, like that.
[ALL SCREAM.]
Come on! Jump on.
We've got to stop it before it hits the river.
SARA: Wait.
How are we supposed to stop it now? MILO: In retrospect, I hadn't thought this through.
They've got to be in here somewhere.
MILO: The wheel! If we hit the water, grab the swag and swim for shore.
I'm too mesmerized by the thought of my own senseless demise! - That's the spirit! - Hold on! [ALL SCREAMING.]
Ah [ALL SCREAMING.]
Oh, thank goodness.
We landed on this much larger ski jump! [ALL SCREAMING.]
SARA: Whoa! [MILO AND ZACK GRUNT.]
[MONKEYS SCREECHING.]
How did this get worse? Wow.
Those monkeys really know their vintage T-shirts.
After them, guys! [MONKEYS CONTINUE SCREECHING.]
Too slow.
Too slow.
[ALL GASP.]
Well, when in Rome If we were in Rome, we would not be riding on the back of an ostrich! Unless we were at a zoo in Rome that had a flightless birds collection.
[SCREAMS.]
I'll get my net.
- Whoa! - Milo! I'm okay.
Reach into my backpack.
There's a knockout gas gun from the llama incident.
# We're going to the zoo We're going to the zoo # [ROARS.]
# And then we're gonna see some animals # # We're going to the zoo We're going to the zoo # # And then we're gonna see some animals # And they have some animals Hey, when's it my turn with the telescope? - I want to see some animals - I'm not looking at animals you dolty snack-hound.
I'm looking for the boy who's been thwarting our mission time and time again.
The enemy agent.
Er, you know, that was just a theory.
- I don't know that he's an actual agent.
- Of course he is! Who else could undermine our every effort with such precision? A soccer mom, a slight wind, - a potted plant maybe - Oh, yes, go ahead.
- Mock me.
- I am.
But when I figure out how to thwart the boy who's been sent to thwart us, I am going to double reverse thwart him back.
I bet we don't even see him this time.
- Five American dollars says we do.
- Forget that.
If I win, you'll stuff your pants full of pistachios and dance to the zoo song.
I will accompany.
And in the reverse, if I win? Sure.
As if I wouldn't do that anyway.
Yeah, that's true.
Giraffe stampede! [PEOPLE SCREAMING.]
What the deuce is going on? [SCREAMING.]
Dakota, save the pistachios! Thanks, everybody, for coming.
To be sure we stay together, please remember to wear your red sash.
[PEOPLE SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY.]
[SCREAMS.]
I'm okay.
[GRUNTS.]
[MONKEYS SCREECHING.]
[STRAINING.]
They're getting away! Diogee, get out of that otter pen! He just loves otters.
- # We're going to the zoo # - What can we do? # We're going to the zoo # # And then we're gonna see some animals # # We're going to the zoo We're going to the zoo # # And then we're gonna see some animals # [SCREAMS.]
[MONKEYS SCREECHING.]
Wow.
Who knew that giraffes like pistachios? How do we get the T-shirts from the monkeys? I think I got it covered.
[MONKEYS SCREECHING.]
Banana cologne! Let's get these back to Mom.
We have 10 minutes left! The pistachios! They're gone! It was him! - I didn't see - Where is he? Where is he? [CHOKING.]
Strangled at the zoo Strangled at the zoo CAVENDISH: It's him! The pistachio spoiler! Oh, my gosh! You're right! Well, looks like you won the bet.
Mom, Mom, we're home! Mom, we got your T-shirts.
I was looking everywhere for these.
I was gonna give them to you guys to donate.
But I thought you loved these shirts.
Yeah, but I'm not 22 anymore.
Besides, I just got this replica of a vintage T-shirt for the party tonight.
Made from recycled old shirts, except it's new.
We're going to the zoo We're going to the zoo And then we're gonna see some animals Oh, oh.
Oh, hey, hey.
There's squirrels in my pants.
There's squirrels in my pants.
And pistachios.
Obviously, there's also pistachios in there.
Probably what attracted the squirrels.
Squirrels in my pants [TITLE MUSIC.]
# We're all livin' in it # CHORUS: # Go, Milo Go, Milo, go # MILO: Oh, thanks, everybody.
That is so motivational! # Go, Milo Go, Milo, go # # Whoa # # I'm not sitting here watching the world turn # You know I'd rather spin it # Go, Milo Go, Milo, go # # It's my world and we're all livin' in it #
# Look at that sun Look at that sky # # Look at my sweater vest I look so fly # # Look at that mailbox Look at that tree # # It's about as beautiful as it can be # # Whoa # Today is gonna be exceptional Never boring even for a minute # It's my world and we're all livin' in it # # Whoa, whoa # Never boring even for a minute # It's my world and we're all livin' in it # MARCUS: Thanks again for inviting us, Martin.
It's good getting to know people in town.
- Glad you came along.
Should be fun.
- I hope so.
I'm a little nervous about heading out in a sinkable vessel - with both Milo and Milo's dad.
- [CHUCKLES.]
Oh, son.
Every time he comes home with a rip in his jeans or covered in "Pterodactyl blood," he credits it to some Murphy family curse.
[CHUCKLING.]
- Yeah.
- Mr.
Underwood, I can assure you that Murphy's Law is real.
But I'm sure everything will work out okay.
Then why do we have 11 life jackets for the four of us? Mathematically, it gives three of us two-and-a-half second chances.
ZACK: Well, that's quasi-comforting, I guess.
Hey, I'll catch up.
I'm gonna get some snacks.
Four bags of pistachios please.
Hey, it's you again.
The kid from the opera.
Oh, yeah, and at the Doctor Zone premiere too, right? I'm Milo.
Milo Murphy.
Vinnie Dakota.
Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you.
What a coincidence.
And thanks for the pistachios.
Yeah, a coincidence [EXCLAIMS.]
A swordfish in fresh water? This is it! From headquarters.
[EXCLAIMS.]
Where is the cart? - Well, there was this swordfish - In freshwater? I know, right? Never mind that.
Our new assignment.
- Every time I see that kid - "Wait for the container ship from Tunisia" Ooh, Tunisia.
Sounds exotic.
"And protect the pistachios.
" You know, I was aware that this was not the most glamorous of assignments, but dagnabit! I didn't study time travel for 20 cycles to end up as a blasted nut cart operator.
I joined up to save the world.
I joined up to prevent the Mississippi Purchase.
- You, you mean the Louisiana Purchase? - You're welcome.
This will not stand.
Prepare yourself, Dakota.
It's time to call the future.
Let's see.
What was that number? Ah, yes.
It was four.
Mmm-hmm.
- Battery is dead.
- I may know somebody with an inter-temporal communicator.
Come on.
Whoops! [SQUAWKING.]
- See? - Oh, that's not a curse.
That's just inexperienced casting.
Lemme show you.
Nice and easy.
You see? - Isn't this freshwater? - And so it begins [MUSIC.]
- DAKOTA: Here we are.
- So, you're telling me that there is an inter-temporal communicator here? - Yeah.
- At this party? Hey, look, piggies in a blanket.
There.
Over there.
CAVENDISH: Brick and Savannah.
Of course! Fellow time travelers.
They'll have one.
Ugh, what are they doing here? Brick, Savannah, normally I wouldn't ask this of you but it seems that the batteries on my - Wait a moment.
You get tuxedos? - Yes.
And you get high school theater costumes? Hey, it's all the past.
We decided to go with the '70s.
Yes, but one of you is from the 1970s and one from the 1870s.
Really? Which one am I? Look, we're kind of in a pinch here.
See, there was this swordfish, and when we tried to use the battery it was dead.
The battery, not the swordfish.
So we're just wondering if it would be possible for us to use your - They're on the move.
- Copy that.
Hey! Why don't we get earpieces? We're standing right next to each other.
- Yeah, so were they! - Oh, come on.
But be sure to add a little margarine to the butter.
- That way it won't burn.
- Yeah? [GRUNTS.]
Wait! So when do I add the flour? [BOTH GRUNTING.]
[CHUCKLES SMUGLY.]
[GROANS.]
Well, you got to admit this is a much cooler mission than we have.
DAKOTA: Oh, look at that.
It's like a pen key.
[BEEPING.]
DAKOTA: Spiffy.
Oh, now he's an art lover.
Ooh, secret panel for hidden safes.
Oh, come on! They get all the good stuff.
Look, if it's not too much trouble, we would like to borrow your inter-temporal communicator.
It's extremely important.
[IMITATING.]
"Oh, extremely important.
" Important is saving the world, preserving the future, stopping World War 5.
What happened to World War 3 and 4? - You're welcome.
- Nice.
Say, you think it's possible that a guy like me and a girl like you [GROANS.]
You know, all this does is make me like you more.
- Got it.
- Lars, bring the car around.
CAVENDISH: Your time vehicle is a limousine? Of course.
What do you have? [STAMMERS.]
Well, you know.
It's just It's just different.
[CHITTERING.]
BRICK: Next stop, Dr.
Grueber's lab, October 1983.
Finally, a bite! Hey! [GRUNTS.]
Whoa! [GRUMBLES.]
Yeah, okay.
Murphy's Law, real thing.
Maybe we should try another spot.
Oh, the humanity! [SCREAMS.]
So, how was your fishing, Dolores? [MOTOR WHIRS.]
Good girl.
Don't worry.
We've always got a backup plan.
MARTIN: There.
You see? ZACK: Whatever can go wrong MILO: Will go wrong.
You know, you really shouldn't mix your South American and your African cichlids.
I made that mistake once.
Cost me $34.
I don't see why you lot get all the good stuff.
Where's my limo? Where's my fish tank? - Where's my attractive partner? - Hey! I'm sitting right here.
Look, Cavendish, you're barely even agents.
You are the lowest of low-level government employees, paired together because no one else will have you.
You were given the most inconsequential mission possible, to save the pistachio, a green nut, only because our boss liked them when he was a kid, before they became extinct.
So, if you don't want to lose your jobs altogether, you better get back to work and make darn sure the pistachio survives until 2085! Now hold on just one minute! [EXCLAIMING.]
Please tell me it didn't just go into the water system.
It went into the water system.
Do you have any idea what you've just done?! [RUMBLING.]
[ROARING.]
CAVENDISH: Your time vehicle is a limousine? Of course.
What do you have? [STAMMERS.]
Well, you know.
It's just It's just different.
You know what? - Let's just get in the car.
- SAVANNAH: Oh no, you don't.
- You're not getting in that car again.
- Why? What? You already went back in time with us once and screwed everything up.
Don't worry.
We went back and fixed it.
But there's no way we're letting you go muck it up again.
You look great in that dress, by the way.
- You've been working out.
- You know I have.
Wait.
We're time travel agents just like you.
- Why do we not get - We don't have time to explain this again.
Talk to the boss.
[BEEPING.]
Cavendish? What do you want? Mr.
Block, sir! We were hoping to get a different assignment.
One more saving-the-world based and less nut related.
Well, I'm looking at this can of mixed nuts and, hmm, I don't see any pistachios.
You two were given the most inconsequential assignment we could find and you still always manage to muck that up.
So, until I see some green nuts in this can, you're on pistachio duty.
Now, get back to work! Their limo smells like peppermint.
MILO: We can use these scuba tanks to propel the ship.
One on starboard, one on port, - so that way we can steer.
- Knock on wood.
[WHOOSHING.]
- You gotta be kidding me! - See? See? [ALL SCREAM.]
- Well, at least we're moving now.
- Now you believe me? We're heading straight for that container ship from Tunisia! And the steering wheel's broken.
Hang on, Dad.
I've got an idea.
Look on the bright side.
My entire career has been one big inconsequential joke.
Where is the bright side? The pistachio shipment is here and unharmed.
Here, Dad.
Wrap this around the steering column.
Come on, guys.
Everybody, lean! [CREAKING.]
Come on, Dad.
[BOTH GRUNTING.]
Milo, it's working.
Comin' in hot.
Everyone hold on! Hey, at least it can't get any worse.
[SCREAMING.]
[ALL SCREAMING.]
- May I take your order? - Who's hungry? Yeah, I could eat.
That's that Milo Murphy I was telling you about.
Every time our pistachios get ruined, he's there.
- Every time.
- No.
And he almost took out the shipment just then.
That's preposterous.
Whoa! - See? - But that would mean [GASPS.]
He's trying to stop us.
He's trying to ruin our mission! Dakota, what we are doing here is not inconsequential.
If it's important enough to send a counter-agent, it must be vital.
Hey, now, you're getting a little We are not just nut-guarding nobodies.
We are secret-spy somebodies with our very own counter agent.
Well, I guess things are looking up.
Just look at him over there, plotting our demise.
I sure love cheese fries.
Oh, this is not over, Milo Murphy.
Not by a long shot.
They're fries with cheese! [CHOMPS.]
# It's my world and we're all livin' in it # The school needs these for the clothing donation drive by tomorrow.
So, we've got to make some tough decisions.
- Hey, where's Melissa today? - She said she had to study.
Out, boy! Those are all clean.
- Well, not anymore.
- Hmm.
Remind me.
What happened to these platypus pajamas? [SCREAMS.]
Hot chocolate.
No, I mean, why are they teal? Aren't platypuses brown? Someone's idea of "artsy.
" Diogee, out! [DOG WHIMPERS.]
I better store them someplace safe until tomorrow.
- Away from Diogee.
- Oh, yeah.
It's Diogee that causes all the problems around here.
Mom, I'm storing the giveaways in your closet to keep them away from Diogee.
BRIGETTE: Tuna casserole.
But not until six! [PANTING.]
Did you know that "donation" comes from the Latin word "donare" meaning "to give"? Nobody cares, Jim.
Here you go, sir.
Sorry, clothes only.
Suitcase donations are on Tuesdays.
- [SCREAMS.]
You didn't! - Didn't what? Give away Mom's collection of rock concert T-shirts! Uh-oh.
Her shirts must've fallen in by mistake.
We got to get them back now, guys! - Those T-shirts are important to Mom.
- How do you know that? These T-shirts are so important to me.
I don't believe that was a real conversation.
Oh, right.
You're guys.
You don't talk about your feelings.
Well, not our feelings about clothes.
Well, we've got to get them back, because Mom and Dad are going to an '80s party and she's planning on wearing her vintage swag, tonight! - In one hour! - She hasn't worn them in years, and we lost them one hour before she needs them? - What are the odds? - Even money.
Yep, even money.
[DOORBELL TINKLES.]
- Mr.
Drako, what are you doing here? - I volunteer on weekends.
You can find the coolest stuff.
Look, a black cape, like I'm a superhero that's evil.
[LAUGHS EVILLY.]
Um, Mr.
Drako, I accidentally donated some of my mom's favorite T-shirts.
- Do you think we could get them back? - Hmm Flea infested underwear, flea infested socks, flea infested mattress.
Oh, here we go! T-shirts! Oh, I'm sorry, Milo.
We ran out of space for the vintage T-shirts.
So, I sent them on to the mulching center.
[YELLING.]
Mulching center?! Yes, they're mulched and shredded, and the material is used to make replicas of vintage T-shirts.
You look like you're about to scream.
Well, if you do, please take it outside.
[DOORBELL TINKLES.]
[ALL SCREAM.]
Yeah, they were about to scream.
- Dakota, enter the password.
- All right.
[BEEPING.]
P-A-S-S-W-O-R-D.
The password is "password"? No, it's "drowssap" backwards.
- "Drowssap"? - Drowssap.
- It's my mother's maiden name.
- Ah.
And it's backwards, so, you know, no one will guess it.
- No one will guess that.
- Yeah, security.
Well done [BEEPING.]
Dakota, Cavendish.
Here are today's pistachio protecting coordinates.
[MACHINE PRINTING.]
I have complete confidence in your abilities.
Don't bungle this assignment like every other one.
Best of luck.
Yes! The zoo! We get to see actual live animals and - Dreadfully happy for you.
- Happy for "us"! We're going to the zoo We're going to the zoo And then we're gonna see some animals Come on.
Join in.
You know you want it.
# We're going to the zoo We're going to the zoo # # And then we're gonna see some animals # - It's going to be a very long day.
- Yeah, hopefully.
[ALL PANTING.]
It's the donation trailer! [AIR HISSING.]
Oh, the back tire? That's my favorite tire! Stash your bike.
Here comes the bus! No problem.
We follow the truck to the mulching center, grab the shirts and we're gold! - [SCOFFS.]
Piece of cake.
- Easy-peasy.
- No sweat.
- In the bag.
- Done deal.
- The crow flies in square circles.
What? I thought we were just saying things.
[TIRES SCREECHING.]
Stop the bus! [TIRES SCREECHING.]
MILO: No time to lose! [WHIRRING.]
Too low.
A little higher, please.
[ALL PANTING.]
ZACK: I'm not used to running after things.
I'm used to things running after us! Yeah, see? See, like that.
[ALL SCREAM.]
Come on! Jump on.
We've got to stop it before it hits the river.
SARA: Wait.
How are we supposed to stop it now? MILO: In retrospect, I hadn't thought this through.
They've got to be in here somewhere.
MILO: The wheel! If we hit the water, grab the swag and swim for shore.
I'm too mesmerized by the thought of my own senseless demise! - That's the spirit! - Hold on! [ALL SCREAMING.]
Ah [ALL SCREAMING.]
Oh, thank goodness.
We landed on this much larger ski jump! [ALL SCREAMING.]
SARA: Whoa! [MILO AND ZACK GRUNT.]
[MONKEYS SCREECHING.]
How did this get worse? Wow.
Those monkeys really know their vintage T-shirts.
After them, guys! [MONKEYS CONTINUE SCREECHING.]
Too slow.
Too slow.
[ALL GASP.]
Well, when in Rome If we were in Rome, we would not be riding on the back of an ostrich! Unless we were at a zoo in Rome that had a flightless birds collection.
[SCREAMS.]
I'll get my net.
- Whoa! - Milo! I'm okay.
Reach into my backpack.
There's a knockout gas gun from the llama incident.
# We're going to the zoo We're going to the zoo # [ROARS.]
# And then we're gonna see some animals # # We're going to the zoo We're going to the zoo # # And then we're gonna see some animals # And they have some animals Hey, when's it my turn with the telescope? - I want to see some animals - I'm not looking at animals you dolty snack-hound.
I'm looking for the boy who's been thwarting our mission time and time again.
The enemy agent.
Er, you know, that was just a theory.
- I don't know that he's an actual agent.
- Of course he is! Who else could undermine our every effort with such precision? A soccer mom, a slight wind, - a potted plant maybe - Oh, yes, go ahead.
- Mock me.
- I am.
But when I figure out how to thwart the boy who's been sent to thwart us, I am going to double reverse thwart him back.
I bet we don't even see him this time.
- Five American dollars says we do.
- Forget that.
If I win, you'll stuff your pants full of pistachios and dance to the zoo song.
I will accompany.
And in the reverse, if I win? Sure.
As if I wouldn't do that anyway.
Yeah, that's true.
Giraffe stampede! [PEOPLE SCREAMING.]
What the deuce is going on? [SCREAMING.]
Dakota, save the pistachios! Thanks, everybody, for coming.
To be sure we stay together, please remember to wear your red sash.
[PEOPLE SHOUTING INDISTINCTLY.]
[SCREAMS.]
I'm okay.
[GRUNTS.]
[MONKEYS SCREECHING.]
[STRAINING.]
They're getting away! Diogee, get out of that otter pen! He just loves otters.
- # We're going to the zoo # - What can we do? # We're going to the zoo # # And then we're gonna see some animals # # We're going to the zoo We're going to the zoo # # And then we're gonna see some animals # [SCREAMS.]
[MONKEYS SCREECHING.]
Wow.
Who knew that giraffes like pistachios? How do we get the T-shirts from the monkeys? I think I got it covered.
[MONKEYS SCREECHING.]
Banana cologne! Let's get these back to Mom.
We have 10 minutes left! The pistachios! They're gone! It was him! - I didn't see - Where is he? Where is he? [CHOKING.]
Strangled at the zoo Strangled at the zoo CAVENDISH: It's him! The pistachio spoiler! Oh, my gosh! You're right! Well, looks like you won the bet.
Mom, Mom, we're home! Mom, we got your T-shirts.
I was looking everywhere for these.
I was gonna give them to you guys to donate.
But I thought you loved these shirts.
Yeah, but I'm not 22 anymore.
Besides, I just got this replica of a vintage T-shirt for the party tonight.
Made from recycled old shirts, except it's new.
We're going to the zoo We're going to the zoo And then we're gonna see some animals Oh, oh.
Oh, hey, hey.
There's squirrels in my pants.
There's squirrels in my pants.
And pistachios.
Obviously, there's also pistachios in there.
Probably what attracted the squirrels.
Squirrels in my pants [TITLE MUSIC.]
# We're all livin' in it # CHORUS: # Go, Milo Go, Milo, go # MILO: Oh, thanks, everybody.
That is so motivational! # Go, Milo Go, Milo, go # # Whoa # # I'm not sitting here watching the world turn # You know I'd rather spin it # Go, Milo Go, Milo, go # # It's my world and we're all livin' in it #