Monk s06e05 Episode Script

Mr. Monk and the Birds and the Bees

Hey.
What are you doing here? You said the place was gonna be empty.
Change of plans.
I decided to help out.
- You're the boss.
- That's right; I'm the boss.
Wait Did you wipe your feet? Yes, sir.
I wiped 'em outside like you said.
Good.
Then let's do it.
- Get started with these right here.
- So, um How's this work? I mean, when do you call the insurance company? I won't be calling the insurance company.
- What's that? - This? This is your gun, Dewey.
My gun? This one's mine.
This is the one I kill the intruder with.
Intruder? Rob? What was that? Are you all right? I'm fine, ann.
Everything's fine.
Better come down.
It sounded like a gun.
- It was.
- Oh, my God.
Rob, is he dead? What did you do? He had a gun this one.
No, wait.
This one.
Oh my God! You've got to help me.
It's my wife She's been shot.
It's eight fifteen.
That's it, I'm officially late for school.
Sweetie, I'm sorry.
I can't just leave.
This is my job.
Well, what about Tim? It's not fair to him.
Don't worry about me, ms.
Teeger.
I already finished all my homework And all of my classwork.
I told you he was a genius.
But what about me? This is my third tardy in two weeks.
Ugh, all right, all right, all right.
You're right.
okay.
One second.
I'll take care of it.
"Dear Mr.
Franklin, "please excuse my daughter Julie and her boyfriend " - Mom.
- Sorry "Friend, Tim Sussman.
They are late to school today because as I was driving them my boss was called in to the scene of a double homicide.
Thank you, natalie Teeger.
All right, so if he has any questions just have him call me.
I'm sure he will.
- You're not wearing that t-shirt.
- Why not? Because it's not appropriate honey.
You're in high school now.
I can't take it off.
And I promised him I'd wear it every day.
- For how long? - Til I die.
You're gonna wear that t-shirt until you die? That's the plan.
Did you know him? His name is Jordan.
Dewey Jordan.
Ring a bell? Did you ever kill anyone? Yes, I have.
It's not like in the movies, is it? - Sorry about this.
- About what? About calling you in on this one.
Obviously pretty open and shut.
Justifiable homicide.
is it? Isn't it? When did you buy the gun? Five months ago.
There were some break-ins down the street.
It's a lucky thing you did because he would've killed you too.
That's for sure.
I don't feel lucky.
All right, we id'd the bodies.
A kid A punk named Dewey Jordan.
He lives in Cole Valley.
About 4:00 am, parks in the driveway right out front.
Point of entry: side patio door.
He parked in the driveway? That's kind of risky.
- Probably figured he'd be in and out.
- Maybe.
The husband Robert Sherman and his wife pam, they're upstairs in bed.
She wakes up, says she's cold.
She comes downstairs to adjust the thermostat.
- Thermostat.
- Yeah, it's right over there.
She confronts the intruder.
He shoots her.
One shot,.
38 caliber.
Husband hears the shot he grabs his gun.
It's a 9-millimeter glock.
- It's registered we already checked.
- Where was the gun? Upstairs in a lockbox near the bed.
So he comes running downstairs.
The intruder fires, misses, hits the wall.
Husband returns fire.
Bang One shot.
End of story.
One shot.
Bang End of Story.
The soles of his shoes are clean.
- So? - He cut through the garden out back.
You think he wiped his feet? Well, it makes sense.
He did want to leave footprints.
But he did leave footprints on the patio.
I saw them when I came in.
Why would he wipe his feet? You wiped your feet.
But I'm me.
That doesn't count.
Why would a kid A burglar Stop and wipe his feet? That doesn't make any sense.
Hey, excuse me.
Hello? yeah, you.
Right, yeah.
Did you wipe your feet? Did I Wipe your feet? It's a $23,000 rug.
Yes, sir.
I wiped them when I came in.
.
Ten times.
I don't believe we've met.
Rob Sherman, this is Adrian Monk.
He's a consultant with us, and I can assure you that Mr.
Monk's feet are clean.
In fact, you could probably eat off them.
It's nothing personal.
It's just It was my wife's favorite rug.
I understand.
- Sorry for your loss.
- I guess it, uh - Hasn't completely sunk in.
- It will.
It'll sink in.
Completely.
Do you mind if I check upstairs? how's it going? Somebody unplugged the phone.
He kept the gun in here? yeah, Is this how you found it? Yeah, we locked the place down.
He heard his wife screaming.
- Opened the box, he grabbed the gun.
- Yeah, that's what the man said.
The box is closed, latched.
If I heard my wife screaming, I wouldn't stop and close the box.
Would you? Oh, I'm not married.
Her slippers.
According to the husband, she went downstairs because she was cold.
If she was cold, why didn't she put on her slippers? That's a good question.
Yeah You'll get the next one.
What are you doing? We're supposed to wait by the car.
It's the final dive.
It's all up to Sussman.
You line your feet up.
You visualize the dive.
And That was perfect.
Excuse me.
This is private property here, okay? Shouldn't you guys be in school? We're with my mom.
Natalie Teeger.
- She's here with Mr.
Monk.
- Yeah, she just went in to get him.
And you are? I'm I'm nobody.
His name is Tim.
He's my boyfriend.
Yeah, I can see that from the shirt.
So where were you guys Some amusement park? Um, yeah, the bay city pier.
He works there.
Guess there's no such thing as dress codes anymore, huh? Mr.
Sherman.
We appreciate your patience.
You can have your house back now.
Do you have any family? Is there somebody that you can call? I'll be fine.
Thank you.
So what happens now? Well, the d.
A.
Will file a report.
And I don't think have anything to worry about.
Kid broke into your house.
You had every right to defend yourself.
I'm not supposed to say this, but I would've done the same thing.
In fact, I would've emptied my gun into the creep.
Why didn't you? - Why didn't I what? - Empty your gun.
You only fired once.
I would think in the heat of the moment.
That's all I needed one shot.
That's all he need.
I guess that's it.
Thank you very much.
Mr.
Monk.
- What do you think? - I think he's the man.
I don't think he's the man.
I think he's the guy.
Okay, let's do it again from the top.
Husband, Robert Sherman.
Owns expensive rug.
Intruders shoes indicate that he wiped his feet.
why would a kid breaking and entering wipe his feet? Because he wasn't breaking and entering.
They knew each other.
It was a setup.
- Maybe - Maybe the kid The intruder Was planning on stealing the rug and he didn't want to scuff it up.
- Thank you.
- Any time.
Maybe he was planning on stealing the rug.
All right, how about this one? The phone in the bedroom was unplugged.
That doesn't mean anything.
I unplug my phone all the time If I want to sleep late or if I'm working.
She's right.
Doesn't mean anything.
Well, here's another one.
The wife's slippers.
The husband said she was cold.
That's why she went downstairs.
Why wouldn't she put on her slippers? She wasn't really cold.
She was just saying she was cold.
She went downstairs to get a bite of that chocolate cake in the refrigerator.
What chocolate cake? Who are you? This is rita depask, aka the lovely rita.
She's a material witness in a knife fight downtown.
Allegedknife fight.
Alleged.
I love that word.
The lovely rita has a point, amazingly enough.
Any hotshot lawyer could explain away that entire notebook.
That's true, that's true.
But if you add it all up, if you look at the big picture.
I mean, it's plain as day.
He's the guy.
- Was the wife insured? - No.
So where's your motive? Wake up! You got two people living under the same roof.
One of them wants the other one dead.
Believe me, I know.
Yeah, he didn't love her.
I was there when the m.
E.
Wheeled out the wife.
All he was thinking about was the rug.
You're cute.
- No, I'm not.
- You ever unbutton that top button? Nah, not No.
There is one problem with your theory.
They never met.
We checked their records.
The bank records, their phone records.
We talked to their friends.
There is no connection between Rob Sherman and Dewey Jordan.
I know I've seen them together.
- Where? - I don't know where! somewhere.
It's driving me crazy.
Well, they lived in different worlds.
Here's Dewey Jordan's rap sheet.
bad checks, drugs, couple of burglaries.
And in sharp contrast, here is Mr.
Sherman's jacket.
One arrest.
One in his entire life.
Driving with a suspended license.
Wait, wait, wait - There is a connection.
- Hey, we did it! You'll mention this to the D.
A.
, right? Fine, okay.
Oh, my God! It's Clay Bridges.
- Like he even knows who we are.
- Julie, he's so cute! Is he looking at us? Oh, my God.
- What's he doing? - He's coming over here.
You're Julie Teeger, right? I'm Lisa.
Hi.
I've seen you around.
- You have? - Yeah.
I'm Clay.
We know You had a great game last Saturday.
Thanks.
You're in honors spanish, right? I'm taking spanish one and I just I can't seem to get it.
You know, some sort of mental block or something.
I was thinking, um, maybe you could tutor me? Um, well, actually, I'm getting ab.
But I could recommend somebody Oh, no, I'm asking you.
Yes or no? Moment of truth.
- Okay.
Sure.
- Cool.
All right.
Hang on.
Who is that? My boyfriend Tim Sussman.
Yeah, I know him.
He's, he's in the band or something.
The swim team.
- I don't remember him.
- He's a diver.
Coach doesn't really use him very much.
Towel boy, huh? This doesn't feel right.
Meeting him here.
What choice did we have? He wouldn't see me at his office, and he's not returning my phone calls.
Yeah, I know, but this is his wife.
Who he killed in cold blood.
Don't forget that.
Gosh.
I remember when Mitch's father was cremated.
We went to carolina and spread his ashes on the beach.
I'm gonna be buried next to Trudy.
I can't wait.
I'm really missing Mitch lately.
You know? He would know what to do with Julie.
She started tutoring this older kid in spanish.
- This senior A big football star.
- Right.
Just yesterday she was crawling around in diapers.
And today I'm worried about some 17-year-old quarterback named Clay.
- Right.
- What did you do? Skinny, fat, skinny, fat.
Skinny believe me; this is the way they would've wanted it.
Yeah, but Mr.
Monk No, what are you doing? The name tags are all mixed up.
- Yeah, I know, but - No I know that this one - went over here.
- No, this is her.
- This one.
- All right, I got it.
No, I got it That's no good.
I got it.
- What are you doing? - Separating them.
- What, you could tell? - I can tell More or less.
Just don't sneeze.
Somebody's coming.
- What are you doing? - It's uneven.
Mr.
Monk, those are people! Maybe they weren't the same size.
Well, they are now.
Mr.
Monk.
- Hello! - Hello again.
- What are you doing here? - Are you family? No, we are, uh We're with the police.
Mr.
Sherman, I'm sorry about this.
I've been trying to call you all day.
Yeah, so I've heard.
You got a problem with me Mr.
Monk? No Just a couple of questions.
Part of the investigation.
What investigation? I spoke with the district attorney.
- He said the case was closed.
- What happened here? The wind.
- Just a draft.
- Like a tunnel.
Table's a little wobbly.
You might want to put a matchbook.
But we cleaned it up.
- A draft? - It's no problem.
You You told the police that you didn't know Dewey Jordan, the man - you killed you said you never met him.
- That's right.
But you were in traffic court four weeks ago, august 14th, 8:00 am, the vinton street courthouse.
And this is Dewey's rap sheet.
He was at a bail reduction hearing.
Same courthouse.
Same day, 8:00 am.
Is that where you met him? Mr.
Sherman.
Is there a problem? No No, there's no problem.
No problem at all.
This is my, secretary, allison clark.
Well, you're right, Mr.
Monk.
It appears that Mr.
Jordan and I were in the same building.
On the same day a few weeks before he was shot.
And I don't believe in coincidence.
No, neither do I.
Maybe that's where he saw me.
- Excuse me.
- Maybe he saw me pull up in my bmw.
Wearing this suit and this $5,000 rolex watch and that's where he decided to try and rob me.
Now, that's possible.
Isn't it? - I'm sorry; I couldn't hear you.
- Yes, it's possible.
Uh, we have to go.
Is that her? That's Mostly her.
Anything else, Mr.
Monk? I didn't think so.
Megu Me gusta mi hermano.
No,mi hermana, remember? Feminine words end in "a.
" it's easy.
No Screen passes are easy.
This is hard.
Okay, and masculine words end in "o.
" likemi amigo.
I hope so.
I was actually hoping we could be more thanamigos.
Honey, it's 10:30.
Didn't you say you wanted to get to bed early? No No, I didn't.
Well, it's probably a good idea.
You have a big day tomorrow.
Clay, see you maniana.
What? - Tomorrow.
- I guess that's my cue.
I'll see you around.
Hey, you've got study hall second period, right? Yeah, how'd you know that? Well, quarterback has to see the whole field.
- It's me.
I just left her.
- It's only 10:30.
Her mom kicked me out, but don't worry.
It's going fine.
She's hooked.
I can tell.
I just gotta reel her in.
Well, reel her in quick.
- Did he ask her out? - Not yet.
Maybe tomorrow.
Relax.
She likes him.
It's gonna happen.
Just like you planned.
I'm not saying no.
I'm just saying that I have to think about it.
When did he ask you? - Just now.
Like, ten minutes ago.
- I didn't hear the phone ring.
It's called a text message.
Welcome to the 21st century, mom.
It's just one party.
It's no big deal.
Okay, then how would you get there.
He would drive me.
Clay is, like, the most popular uy in school, and he really likes me.
And if you don't let me go, then I'm never gonna talk to you again.
Sweetie, what are you doing? This is stuff Tim gave me.
I'm getting rid of it.
You're breaking up? We already did.
When? - Just now! - I don't believe it.
You don't, huh? Well, keep watching.
Why? Tim was so great.
Of course you liked him.
Mothers love Tim.
He's He's safe and he's polite.
.
And smart, and he's cute, and he's on the swim team.
Great! Why don't you date him? Wait, what are you doing? Don't Don't do that.
Come on, let's just talk about this.
It's my life, mom.
Yeah, I know it is, honey.
Well, you don't act like it.
And just rember, in four and a half months, I'm gonna be 16! What does that mean? How long did he live here? Ten months.
I should've known he was gonna be trouble.
Always late with the rent.
Always coming and going.
I mean, is it true what they're saying? He broke in and killed the guy's wife? I don't know.
I don't think so.
She'll be 16.
Four and a half months.
Stop torturing yourself.
It doesn't mean anything.
- You think so? - Of course.
She's looking forward to her birthday.
It's no big deal.
- This is your daughter? - Yeah.
What is it? This air vent - It's rusty.
- So? The screws are brand new.
Do you have a screwdriver? Mr.
Monk, I just don't think you're getting it.
He's a senior.
He's like an adult.
He invited her to a party on Saturday night.
- There will be college kids there.
- She'll be fine.
There'll be a lot of other people around, right? No, I'm not worried about the party.
I'm worried about after the party.
Oh, God, Mitch.
I miss you.
Mr.
Monk? Will you talk to her? - Me? - Please, I don't know who else to ask.
There's no man in her life.
What about him? Who, Mr.
Morrissey? Kids respect landlords.
I think it's the keys.
What is it? It's a.
22.
Why didn't he bring this gun? So he had another gun.
But there's no ammo for a.
38 caliber.
It's all for this gun.
I don't think he had another gun.
Mr.
Monk, please.
This is important to me.
Julie loves you.
You're like family You know that.
Just I-can't I just can't.
Why don't you ask the Captain or anybody else.
When it comes to this particular issue, I'm probably the least qualified person in north america.
That's what makes you perfect.
You waited for Trudy.
You were faithful.
You respected her.
You're a wonderful role model.
In this particular case.
Why don't you just give it a few weeks? See how it goes.
I always find doing nothing and never mentioning it again is always the best policy.
Mr.
Monk, two weeks will be too late.
Please, please talk to her.
It's my daughter.
My little girl.
- Mr.
Monk, are you still here? - Yeah, I just Do you have a minute? Sure.
Um, Julie, your mother Is, uh, very worried about you.
What's going on? She wanted me to talk to you about Certain things about life.
And, uh And things She thought it might be helpful if you had someone you could talk to.
I'm supposed to be giving you the big talk.
Why? Because you're dating an older boy.
No, I mean why you? That's what I said.
See, Julie, the years between 14 and 32 are a very confusing time for a young girl.
I really appreciate this.
It'll just be a couple more minutes, okay? You know, you're body's changing.
You're gonna start feeling things New things.
And you're gonna wonder how to act and what to do.
It might be best just to wait Until you meet the right person.
Or you don't have to do anything, right? Until Until you're sure.
You have any questions? no? Great, well, I'm-I'm-I'm glad we had this little talk.
I can tell that it's been very helpful to you.
We certainly had a positive, very, very productive talk.
This is the end of the talk.
Wait, Mr.
Monk.
How do you know if What you're feeling is real? - What are you doing? - No, I'm serious.
When you met Trudy - How did you know? - Listen.
This is not real.
I'm not really here, okay? This is just for your mother.
Don't cry.
you can't cry.
I can't leave if you're crying.
What you're feeling is perfectly normal.
What you're feeling is probably normal.
It's just How did you know? Okay, look I used to wonder the same thing.
When I met Trudy, I said, "now I see.
- Now I see why I'm here.
" - was it wonderful? Yeah.
I loved falling in love with her.
Every day, every morning, I fell in love with her again.
I think what your mother has been trying to say is just don't worry.
All your dreams will come true.
They don't have to come true this weekend.
Right? You can take your time.
You can wait.
Until I find Trudy.
Just wait for Trudy.
Believe in Trudy.
Trudy will come.
Now stop crying And let me out of here.
Captain.
Make yourself at home, randy.
Door was open.
- What's going on? - I think Monk was right.
It looks like Rob Sherman and Dewey Jordan did meet at the courthouse.
This is the security camera from the main lobby, august 14th, 8:00 a.
M.
I can't see anything.
This is Rob Sherman; that's Dewey Jordan.
Where? Right there.
Here.
Here and there.
Randy, they're two blurs.
Even for blurs, they're blurry.
- Can you make it bigger? - It's already enhanced.
Well, that could be anybody.
That could be fred astaire and ginger rogers.
But they're both dead.
Ginger rogers is not dead.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure she is dead.
I'm sorry.
Even if she wasn't, what would fred and ginger be doing in the courthouse? I'm not saying it is fred and ginger, I'm just saying that you can't tell who or what they are.
Yeah, look Right There.
See? He comes in, they shake hands.
That is definitely Rob Sherman.
Is that a permanent marker? No, it'll come off.
I don't think so.
Have you seen the new screens? Pretty beautiful.
Flat.
You're worse than Monk.
Well, I just wanted to thank you again.
Oh, I'm glad I could help.
Be careful, I don't want them to get wrinkled.
Oh, sorry.
Well, Julie told me about how you talked about Trudy and how you met.
She just said it was really, really sweet.
So, thank you.
- What lesen? - That's Clay! Is that Julie? What did you say to her? Excuse me.
Ms.
Teeger.
Sorry Does Julie know about this? Who's Julie? This is not what you think.
Or what you think.
Somebody hired me to go out with her daughter.
- You said get a job! - Somebody hired you? Your sister, karen.
Aunt karen? She said she didn't like Julie's boyfriend so she paid me $500 to break them up.
- Clay, I don't have a sister.
- No, it's true.
I can prove it.
I still got the money.
Most of it.
Excuse me.
Can I see that? Careful.
This woman, this aunt karen What did she look like? Uh, pretty, long dark hair.
With glasses? How'd you know? Natalie I know what's going on.
Julie, the murder It's all connected.
- Is this it? - The bay city pier.
- Who are all these people? - I don't know, Mr.
Monk.
- Who's he? - I don't know, Mr.
Monk.
Is he bothering you? You want me to ask him to leave? You better not.
He might get mad.
The Captain will be here any minute.
Maybe we should just wait here.
Mrs.
Teeger! Mrs.
Teeger, what are you doing here? Hey, right here! Hey, you guys, what are you doing here? Is Julie here? No, we're here on a job.
You might want to give her a call though, because I'm pretty sure she's gonna break up with Clay.
- She is? Did she say that? - No, not yet.
- Can I tell him? - I don't think you should.
- I'm gonna tell him.
- Why do you bother asking? Clay Bridges never liked Julie.
Not really.
- Somebody paid him to go out with her.
- Somebody paid him? Who? He did.
Mr.
Sherman? What's he doing here? - He's not here to play skeeball.
- I better follow him.
Stay here and wait for the Captain.
Julie's t-shirt? That's what this whole thing has been about.
Her t-shirt? I don't understand.
Tim, I've been waiting a long time to say this.
Here's what happened.
We know Dewey Jordan has been here.
Mr.
Monk noticed some game coupons in his apartment.
Mr.
Sherman and Dewey Jordan met a couple weeks ago at the courthouse.
Sherman probably told Dewey he was pulling some kind of insurance scam but they had to meet again some place to work out the details.
They met here at the pier.
It was perfect Noisy, a big crowd, nobody would notice them.
I don't understand.
What does all this have to do with Julie? It was the same day you and Julie were here getting your picture taken.
That's where Mr.
Monk had seen them together.
On Julie's t-shirt.
They were in the background the whole time.
That's why he was acting so weird that day we met him.
When Mr.
Sherman saw that t-shirt he knew he was in trouble.
He saw Julie hanging out with Mr.
Monk, the Captain, and randy.
It was only a matter of time before somebody noticed it.
I know, but why didn't he just try to steal it? Much too risky.
Remember, he didn't have to destroy the shirt.
He just wanted Julie to stop wearing it.
So he had his girlfriend contact Clay.
- She pretended to be Julie's aunt.
- I get it.
Julie breaks up with me and she never wears the shirt again.
She's right, you are pretty smart.
That's why we're here.
The Captain's getting a search warrant.
The photo booth keeps backup copies of all the pictures.
Uh, copy Why do you need a copy? Where's the t-shirt? Julie burned it.
She what? sorry.
Guess you can't win them all, detective, huh? - Tim! - You okay? I got them.
That's Julie boyfriend.
He's on the swim team.
Thanks, Tim! Back up disc.
And I printed off a copy.
Well, you and your friend take a very nice, very incriminating picture.
I put it on a mug too.
What for? I figured the jury would appreciate it.
They're human, the get thirsty.
Exhibit a, thank you very much.
Mmm Guilty.
How are you guys doing? I think we're okay.
We were just listening to the news.
You're a hero.
I don't feel like a hero.
- Well, you are.
- Thanks, mrs.
Teeger.
Tim and I are gonna hang out here for a while.
I mean, if that's okay.
Sure, go ahead.
have fun.
Have fun.
What What's that for? Our little talk.
Wipe.
- No.
- Natalie.
No, that one stays on.
- For how long? - Maybe forever.
- I can feel it.
- Good.
Come on, I'm not gonna wipe it off.
I'm just gonna dab it.
You.

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