My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic s04e22 Episode Script

Trade Ya

Yes! Best day ever! We all going to the Rainbow Falls Traders Exchange! And not just going! We're accompanying a princess on a official royal duty! Please, it's not that big of the deal.
There always has to be a princess at the Exchange.
Last year was Princess Cadance, this year it's me.
It's just a formality.
I'm sure no other pony will even notice I'm here.
Look over there, a princess! This is amazing! Could be wrong, but I think they might have noticed.
Oh my goodness! You said it! The Rainbow Falls Traders Exchange is simply divine.
You can get anything you want here.
If'n you got the goods to trade for it.
No! Thanks, Twilight.
One ding, nick or dent, and this Power Ponies comic book wouldn't be in perfect mint condition anymore.
And, if you want to trade for a mint comic, you gotta have a mint comic.
I guess a pony who's here for a official princess business, has to expect a little fussin'.
But all I'm supposed to do is settle disagreements over whether a trade is fair or not.
And since the rule is that a trade is fair as long as both ponies get what they want, there's never been a disagreement.
So there's really no need for anypony to treat me as anything special.
Hi! Can I help you? There's a pony here who's got a signed, first edition of Daring Do and the Quest for the Sapphire Statue, and I'm gonna get it! I've been able to get first editions of all of the Daring Do books, except this one! Nopony's ever put together a whole set, and I'm gonna be the first! If it hasn't been traded yet It's the only one in all of Equestria! Oh no! I'd really hate to see you disappointed.
I did want to trade this bear call I've got for a bird whistle but getting that book seems so important to you, so if you need me to help you first Normally I'd say I don't need any help but you're right.
This is really important.
I've gotta get that book! Well, I'm off to take a gander at some of the vintage stalls.
Did you say vintage? Why, old and rare items are so in style right now! I'm hoping to get a vintage item as well.
I just hope I brought enough to trade.
I know what you mean, Rarity.
Hey! Why don't we pool our trade stashes? Pool? That way, if one of us finds somethin' real valuable she can't live without She'll definitely be able to get it! Who could say no to exchanging a single object for such a huge assortment of items? Oh, yes! That is absolutely brilliant! I'm so glad I have a friend like you, Applejack.
I feel the same way.
Then let's go shopping! Shouldn't your princessness be heading to the royal box seats? I may be the princess on a duty, but I don't think that means I have to sit up there all alone doing nothing.
Ever since I became a princess, Celestia has been sending me more books to read than ever.
The library is overflowing.
So, I figured while we're here, I might as well trade away some books I don't need anymore.
There it is! The first edition of the Daring Do and the Sapphire Statue! It han't been traded yet! Lucky for you! Because I've brought my most valuable possession to trade for it.
My lucky horseshoe.
I don't want it.
What? It's just a rusty old horseshoe.
That's not worth anything to me.
But But how is Rainbow Dash gonna get that book she really wants? She's not.
Unless, she can get me that! Oh, an Orthros.
How cute! The pony running the ancient beasts stall doesn't want anything I've got.
But if you can get me the Orthros, I'll trade you the book for it.
You got it! I don't know how, but somehow, we're gonna get that Orthros.
Oh, Applejack, I am so glad I found you.
Me too, you're not gonna believe it! I found a super-valuable vintage item that I just have to have and all it's gonna cost is all our stuff! So, where is this valuable vintage item that you want to trade everything we have for? There! Where? Right there! But that's a dented old pie tin.
A dented vintage pie tin.
The metal they used to fashion this one helps cook the pies up to five seconds faster! They don't make 'em like this anymore.
I'm so glad you showed that to me, darling.
Because once you see what I've found, you won't want to waste our trade goods on that.
Just look at this gorgeous vintage brooch.
It's one of a kind! It looks exactly like the one you're already wearin'.
Why, yes, they may look the same, but I know it's older, and that's what makes it so much more divine! But that doesn't make a lick of sense! Why, I'd wager if I switched them up, you wouldn't even know the difference! Oh, don't be silly, of course I would! So which is the vintage one? That one, of course.
Ha! You're bluffing! Am I? How can you tell? Well, because… Duh! I can't! Cause the one you want to waste our whole stash on is exactly the same as the one you already got.
There's no way anypony would notice the difference.
I'd say it's a lot more likely they'd notice that then some dented tin that cooked a pie a whole two seconds faster! It's five seconds faster! Yes, such a good two-headed boy! Yes you are! Stop that! C'mon! Don't you start now, too! Okay, I can see you're busy, so I'll give it to you straight.
I need to trade this horseshoe for that.
Nope.
Down, boy! Watch out for the lamp! Well, I could use another lamp.
A whole stand filled with Discord-shaped lamps? Seriously?! They really do have everything at the Traders Exchange.
Would you trade a lamp for my horseshoe so I can trade it for an Orthros and get my book? No.
But I'd trade it for an antique chicken.
Great! What's an antique chicken? Oh, I got all kinds of antique chicken statues.
I got your blue hens, speckled grays, your- Okay, cool! So will you trade one for a horseshoe so I can trade it for a lamp and then trade it for an Orthros so I can get my book? Well, lemme think No.
But I'd gladly trade one of my chickens for a crystal chalice.
Hold on a sec.
We need a crystal chalice to trade for a chicken to trade for a lamp to trade for an Orthros.
So what are you willing to trade for it? I'm guessing it's gonna be some crazing thing way across the Exchange.
Actually, I could use a slightly rusty old horseshoe.
Yeah, like where am I gonna find- Wait, I've got one of those! Now that we've got the chalice, this is gonna be a cinch! Do you really think so? All we gotta do is bring this thing to the chicken stand and we are- You want me to trade all my books for a broken pen? Alright, fine.
You got yourself a- Stop! What are you doing?! I was trying to get rid of all the old books that I don't need anymore For that? Do you rea-a-a-a-ally want that? Well, not really, but I'm running out of library space, so- Ohmygosh, ohmygosh, ohmygosh! I can't believe that almost happened! But luckily, it didn't happen, thanks to me.
What are you talking about? According to the rules of the Exchange, a trade is only fair if both ponies end up with something they want.
You can't break the rules! Did anypony see you do it? I don't think anypony saw! But you're not gonna say anything, are you?! Haha, I'm just kidding! Or am I?! Sometimes I can't even tell! Y'know, if you want to go check out the rest of the Exchange and trade whatever you brought Nope, I just came to pony-watch! I'm not going anywhere.
I won't let you make a mistake like that again! Hey, everypony, step right up! Do not walk! Gallop look over here for your chance to trade for this one-of-a-kind official princess merchandise! Well, that took forever.
I just hope it looks okay! This is perfect! Perfect for the broken chalice mosaic I'm making! Alright, so what kind of antique chicken do you want? I got speckled, brown, gray Oh no! The pony we're supposed to trade the chicken statue to didn't tell us what kind he wanted! Okay, look.
I'm fast.
I'll fly over to the lamp stand and find out what kind of chicken he wants.
Just don't let anypony trade for any chicken while I'm gone, okay? Well, okay! I can do that, I think.
Um, well, maybe you shouldn't get one of those? You know unless you really want to Beat it! You go.
I'll stay here.
Well, since we can't both get what we want, I will be the better friend.
You take our trade goods and get what you want.
I'm an amazin' friend! So even though it's for somethin' that don't seem valuable at all, you take our stash.
How dare you let me get what I want.
What kind of friend do you think I am? You are going to get what you want! No, you are! Hello! We got the kind of chicken you asked for! Hello? Where's the pony running this joint? 'On break'?! These books made Twilight the princess she is.
Before that, she was nothing – a big, fat zero! Hey! Then she read these books, and voila! Princess! So who wants to start the bidding? Just a moment, please! Pinkie, I appreciate your help and all, but I'm not sure I'm comfortable with this.
Nopony should trade for my books just because I'm a princess.
I'm not better than anypony else! I know you're not better than everypony! Just leave this to me! Did I mention that Princess Twilight got these books from Princess Celestia? Whoa, wait, you don't mean- Oh, that's right! Double princess! There he is! Look, I know it's your break and all, but you gotta open your stand so we can trade you for a lamp! Sorry, girls.
Been trading all day.
My belly's tellin' me it's time to eat an oatburger.
Oh come on, please? Pretty pretty please? Sorry, belly says 'no'.
But the Exchange ends at sundown! No! I've got an idea.
Next! Next! Next! Next! Next! We're home free! As long as this thing doesn't drown us in slobber.
Oh, he's just an affectionate two-headed fellow, aren't you, little boy? No, I insist.
You go fetch what you want, 'cause that's the kind of tried and true friend I am.
I am way too generous to let you out-friend me like that! We gotta hurry! We're never gonna get to the Daring Do stand through this crowd in time! Come on! My bear call… We gotta go! Of course.
It's just a bear call.
There's nothing I could've traded it for that's more valuable to me than you.
Okay.
The Exchange is almost over.
We did it.
We traded a crystal chalice for an antique chicken.
And the chicken for a lamp.
And a lamp for an Orthros.
Just like you asked.
So here you go.
Now, where's my book? Yeah You know, the thing is I don't want an Orthros anymore.
But… What do we do now? Oh goodness.
Argh! Good boys.
Hey! You said you wanted an Orthros.
I've been watching that thing over at the ancient beast booth, it's crazy! I don't want one in my house! There, there.
That's a good Orthros.
You just have to know how to treat them.
With a little patience training, and a big slobber mop, they can be a wonderful household pet.
Alright, alright.
I'll trade you.
Yes! If she comes and stays with us in Manehattan until it's trained.
Gosh.
Training an Orthros takes a long time.
I'll probably be gone from Ponyville for… I don't even know how many moons! But if that is what you really want… So, we got a fair deal? Of course it's a deal! Yeah-eah, whoo! I did it, I did it! Fluttershy, can you believe it? Oh no! What did I do?! Who's got something valuable enough to trade for Princess Twilight's princess books that she got from Princess Celestia? Did I say "princess"? Over here! Over here! Oh come on! These are the books that Princess would sit up with all night with nothing to read by but the light of her own horn.
Ooh, now that looks fun.
But not fun enough! These are the books that make Twilight the Princess she is! So who's got what it takes to trade for them? When you put it like that… Wait! Stop! Come back! These books aren't that great.
Oh yes they are.
But I thought you wanted to get rid of them! None of those ponies had anything valuable enough to trade for my books.
Not because these books belong to a princess, but because they help make me who I am, Just like you said.
This is the one I was so absorbed in the day Spike decided he owed Applejack a life debt.
And this one reminds me of the day I got it, which was the day I met you.
I may not ever need to read them again.
But that doesn't mean they don't have value.
I realize that now.
Thanks to you, Pinkie.
I told you I'd take care of everything! Twilight! I need your to say a trade wasn't fair.
Fast! I've heard what you both had to say, and I'm sorry, Rainbow Dash, but my hooves are tied.
You said it was a fair trade.
Yeah, I said it.
But I was wrong! I did want that book.
A lot.
I said I wanted it more than anything in all of Equestria.
But there's no thing that's worth as much to me as a friend.
I might've forgotten that for a little bit.
But it's true.
Which means there's no way this trade can be fair! Oh come on, that's… The sweetest thing I've ever heard! Okay.
The trade's off.
And with that I declare this trial and this year's Rainbow Falls Traders Exchange over! I know it's not the pie tin you were after.
But I hope you like it.
I's the rustiest piece of junk I could get.
Well, I took my half of our stash and got you this.
And I know you gonna love it.
Cause you already have a bunch of those that look exactly the same sitting in the drawer, doing nothing.
So, that should settle it once and for all which of us is the better friend.
Oh, come on! You both gave up what you wanted to do something for each other.
That's the coolest thing a friend can do.
Trust me.
I know.
Hey! Where is your double doggie? I traded it for something way better.
Well, what do you know.
My copy of Daring-Do and a Sapphire Statue.
It's just a beat-up old paperback.
Not a one-of-a-kind first edition.
Even better! Because I can read this one with all my friends.
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