Psych Episode Scripts

N/A - No Country for Two Old Men

Oh, Carlton.
What a great housewarming gift.
We could really use these, um steak knives? Those are ninja kunai throwing blades.
For use in case of a home invasion.
I suppose you could also use them to carve animal flesh, especially if said animal is invading your home.
- Ah-ha.
- Mm.
- What's this? Oh.
- Oh! Giant clown gloves.
Finally, a housewarming gift we can use.
Shawn, these are oven mitts.
Thank you, mom, thank you, Lloyd.
You're so welcome, sweetie.
Well, I-I believe a person can't be too careful when baking.
Which reminds me of a very interesting story about a client of mine.
And he owned a doughnut shop, I believe, that was in receivership.
- And-- - Lloyd.
I'm sorry, it's not the time for one of my accounting anecdotes.
Honestly, sweetie, it never is.
Besides, I didn't marry you for your jokes.
I married you because you're honest, and dependable, and not to mention incredibly sexy.
Oh.
Well, I think that's it for the gifts, everybody.
Help yourselves to an authentic Mexican buffet, compliments of my dear father, and the ladies from Ole Mole! That's what I'm talking about.
Fan of Baja, California, huh, Lloyd? Oh, uh, yes, well, um, I'm a bit of a geography nut.
With this new phone, I can dial up maps from all over the world.
Uh, would you like to see Swedish Lapland? - Boy, would I? - Just hold on a second.
See if I can get it.
Go ahead, I dare you.
Nothing gets past me.
Uh! Don't worry.
I'll go and fix us a plate.
You know, babe, you're a much better tennis player than me.
True.
It's amazing how fast our lives change, huh? You moved in with Jules, I found the woman of my dreams.
Who neglected to tell you she had a seven year old.
I gotta give it to you, buddy.
You sure are acting calm, all things considered.
That's because I'm not acting, Shawn.
I'm cool with it.
I'm a family man now.
Gus, don't be the remake of Yours, Mine, and Ours.
For that matter, don't be the original either.
It's okay to admit that you're freaking out on the inside.
Maybe you don't understand because you don't have any children yet.
Don't worry, buddy.
It'll happen for you someday.
They grow up so fast, don't they? You met him a week ago.
I'll tell you, Julia, I really expected your stepdad to be a little different.
I thought Lloyd would be a little more like-- Awesome? Like Frank.
Frank was a lowlife con man.
No offense, sweetie.
None taken.
- I think he was talking to me.
- Right.
I'm gonna go check on Lloyd.
See where those drinks are.
You know, Jules, first of all, there is no longer a "you.
" It's just "us.
" We live as one now.
Matter of fact, we should start thinking of a singular name that covers both of us.
Juli-hawn, Shawn-iet, there's also Shules, if you're a fan of brevity.
Yeah, we're not doing that.
When Maryanne and I first met, I was counseling her in her accounting, and I found oh, so many discrepancies.
But the one thing that I said to Maryanne You got to admit it'd be fun if the two of them became friends, though.
Come on, my dad could use a new buddy.
Look, if a friendship evolves, great, but I think we should stay out of it, and let it happen naturally.
- You're right.
- Yeah.
Hello, this, uh-- this is Luther's, right? I'd like to make a lunch reservation for two.
My father, and soon-to-be new best friend.
Wait-- Sorry, man, I'm not a fan of nature, all right? It's slow, it's overrated.
Hello.
Hey, Henry, it's Lloyd.
Listen, I'm gonna be a little late to the restaurant.
I have to pick up a package at a mailbox place over on Presidio.
Oh, I know that place.
It's right around the corner from where I live.
Why don't I just pick it up on the way over? Oh, no, I couldn't ask you to do that.
Hey, it's no problem.
- You sure? - No trouble at all.
You promise? Lloyd, I could've already gotten it by now.
Okay, the number is 227.
It's easier if you just give 'em the number, and not my name, all right? - Got it.
- You want to write that down? Lloyd, I said I got it.
I'm not senile, you know.
No, I only say that because I sometimes have trouble remembering things.
It's 227.
Did I say that? Lloyd, I'm hanging up now.
Okay, did I say 227? Hello? Hi, there.
I need to pick up a package.
Box number? What is that third number? Six? You're asking me? I can't believe I forgot the damn number.
Maybe I am going senile.
Anyway, it's under "Lloyd French.
" - Yeah.
- Thank you.
Get in! Damn, they're gone! - What the hell's happening? - Buckle up, Henry! Uno, dos, tres, cuatro! You forgot the number, didn't you? You're seriously gonna blame me for what just happened? Don't worry, they won't come after us.
- How do you know? - This is their car.
All right, Lloyd, you wanna tell me what the hell's going on? Well, as far as I can make out, those Mexican gentlemen want what's in this package.
No crap.
What's in there? What is it, drugs? Oh, no, no.
The contents are nothing illegal.
No, you have my word on that.
Well, your word means diddley-squat to me right now, Lloyd.
I'll bet you're not even an accountant.
I most certainly am.
In fact, if you ever need your taxes done In fact, I have a-- Hands on the wheel, Lloyd! All right, Lloyd.
What's going on, really? I'm delivering this package to an old friend in exchange for forgiveness of a somewhat sizeable gambling debt.
How sizeable? Oh, somewhere between $1 million and $10 million.
Who are you calling? Lassiter.
Gotta report all this.
Could you do me a big favor and hold off on that? I'm asking you as a friend.
Friends don't lie to friends and then get them shot at, Lloyd.
You know, I just had major surgery.
I'm sure this is not good for my healing process.
- Yeah, can you--excuse me.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa! That was wrong of me.
Gimme one good reason I shouldn't punch you in the face.
Glass jaw, winning smile.
Please don't.
All right.
Hear me out.
Then we can go to the cops, I promise.
You got one minute.
This is my last debt.
All I have to do is deliver this package, and my slate is clean.
And you expect me to believe what's in this box is not illegal.
I swear on Juliet's life.
Maryanne, Juliet, the boys.
They all think that I'm this boring accountant.
Finding out I'm just another Frank is gonna kill them.
Please.
And afterward, we drive straight to the police station.
Absolutely.
I was thinking a pinkberry on the way back-- Lloyd, don't push it.
I smell cumin.
I specifically asked for no cumin.
Mm, what smells so good? It smells like cumin.
Help yourself.
- Sweet.
- What're you doing here, man? I thought you were spending the day with Rachel and Maximus.
Oh, I'm on a break while she takes him to the eye doctor.
Gotta give him credit, man.
The way you're handling this whole thing, if it was me, I'd be freaking out that she has a kid.
I'm the exact opposite.
In fact, I wish Rachel had more kids.
I wish we were the black Von Trapps.
- O'Hara, we just got a call.
- What is it? Shots fired outside a mailbox place on Presidio.
I know that place.
It's near my dad's.
Really? Well, that's interesting-- the witness described a middle-aged bald guy in a Costco Hawaiian shirt fleeing the scene, getting into a Cadillac SUV being driven by another middle-aged bald guy in a yellow tie.
You set up a lunch for them, didn't you? I thought we agreed to let things happen naturally.
Okay, first of all, why is everyone so high on nature? And what's the harm in the two of them sitting down to a nice gentlemen's lunch? Because Lloyd is a former gambling addict, and I'm pretty sure he's up to his old tricks.
Wait a minute.
"One Can Never Be Too Careful While Baking" Lloyd? Yes, I did a background check on him when he started dating my mom.
He'd been clean, so I didn't want to tell her.
Is it weird that I like Lloyd a little bit more now? That is weird.
Put an APB on the caddy.
I'm heading over to the mailbox place now.
I am coming with you.
Dude, you don't have to come.
Oh, no, it's cool.
Seriously, you should go be with your family.
Ugh, I'm suffocating, Shawn.
Last week I was my own man.
Now, every time I turn around, there they are.
I don't want to be the black Von Trapps, I want to be I Am Legend, that's the truth of the matter.
You want to be the only man left in a post-apocalyptic world.
Just take me with you.
Go, Henry.
Lloyd, what're we doing here? Where is your friend? Close by.
Whoa, whoa, hey, Lloyd.
Lloyd, you never said anything about taking an airplane.
Fairly certain I did.
- No, you said "One stop.
" - Yes, exactly.
We get in the plane, and then we make one stop.
That's not what you said.
Okay, fine.
Agree to disagree.
You lied to me.
My friend lives just a short way from here.
We'll get back before you know it.
Out of the plane, Lloyd.
We really should be going.
We're not going anywhere.
You're under arrest.
Henry, we're practically family.
And need I remind you, you're not even a cop anymore.
Let's go, Henry! Whoa! Lloyd! Lloyd! Wait! Wait! Damn it! It's just about four pounds.
- Maybe 3, 3.
7.
- All right.
Detective Lassiter, SBPD.
I'm gonna need the tapes from your store's security cameras.
Pronto.
Let's go, squirrel-face.
Tapes.
Crime is money.
Lassiter.
Lloyd is still not picking up.
Yeah, I'm just getting my dad's voicemail again.
Are you getting anything to help us figure out who might be shooting at them? Uh-hmm unfortunately, Indian food impairs my gift.
Especially curried crab.
I'm crab blocked.
Hey, why didn't you tell me about Lloyd's shady past earlier? I was embarrassed for my mom.
He has the worst track record when choosing men, and not just Lloyd and my dad.
First, there was Joe the embezzler.
Then Al the drunken pickpocket.
And then Steve, who sold defective above-ground pools.
- Above-ground pools? - Yeah.
That is quite a streak.
All I know is that relationships are tough.
And sometimes, a man just needs his space.
Dude, you were with Rachel and Maximus for what, half a day? Shawn, time is relative.
It's semantics.
- I don't think it's semantics.
- You don't know.
All right, call came in from an employee at a private airfield out on Route 7.
Apparently a single-engine plane just took off with two men matching Henry and Lloyd's description.
They were also being shot at by a bunch of guys matching the description from our shooters here.
Oh, my God, this is just getting worse.
Did they say where they were headed? They didn't file a flight plan.
- Can we track them with radar? - Transponder's been turned off.
But it took off to the south, and they've only got enough fuel for about 300 miles.
Big fan of Baja, California, huh, Lloyd? I'm a bit of a geography nut.
I'm no longer crab blocked.
I know where they're going.
What? Don't worry, Henry.
Things are gonna go much smoother from here on in.
Oh, you look tired.
Why don't you grab a nap? You stole this airplane, you stole the Cadillac.
Those are felonies.
You are in big trouble.
Oh, relax.
No one stole anything.
I rented this plane, and I'm fairly certain those Hispanic gentlemen stole that Cadillac from someone else.
That should make you feel better.
- It doesn't.
Not one bit.
- Well, then this will.
After we deliver the package, lunch is on me.
Because I know a place down here.
It makes a delicious chicken sandwich.
Is that the border fence? Did we just cross the border? Well, if you ask me, we should get rid of that fence.
You know? This is America.
It's the land of equal opportunity.
Let everybody in! Am I wrong, here? You didn't say anything about going to Mexico.
I did too.
I said, "My friend lives to the south.
" That's it.
Turn the plane around.
No, no, I can't do that.
We're practically there.
And Uh-oh, good thing, too, because we are almost out of fuel.
What? What-- I survived a bullet to the chest only to go down in a fiery plane crash? No one is going to crash.
I've done this so many times on the simulator.
Simulator? Are you telling me that you've never actually landed a plane? Not that many times.
Not ever.
This look even to you? Oh This is pretty even, right? Okay, here we go Whoops, that's too much.
Ah, that's too little.
And they say to breathe.
And how you doing? You all right? All right.
That wasn't so bad, was it? Smooth sailing from here on in.
Hello, Lloyd.
Welcome to Mexico.
Easy, easy, easy.
Oh, that hurts.
Oh, come on.
I'm surprised to see you, Lloyd.
You're not a very popular person down here.
Your friend used to bet on every bull fight and card game from here to Cabo San Jose.
He was also known for leaving town without paying his debts.
First of all, he's not my friend.
That's a bit harsh, don't you think? Lamas, maybe you haven't heard I don't gamble anymore, I haven't for years, and I paid back everything I owe.
Really? Then what are you doing here, Lloyd? I could not be more innocent.
You see, Henry and I came down here to pick up some of your excellent Coca-Cola.
I don't know why, but yours tastes better.
It's because we use real sugar.
Oh.
But I know that is not why you are here.
Word has it you're here to deliver a very important package to Pablo Nunez.
That Pablo Nunez? I happen to know you still owe him mucho dinero.
And I think in this package are the engraving plates recently stolen from the U.
S.
Mint.
The same plates Pablo has been trying to get his hands on.
Well, this is worse than I thought, Lloyd.
I've involved me in a serious federal crime, here.
Henry, I admit I haven't always been up front with you, but I swear to you on Julia's life-- Stop swearing on her life! The plates are not in that box.
And I'm supposed to believe that.
Yes.
Believe I've earned that.
- After all, I've saved your life.
- What? No, I'm gonna go a step further.
I've improved your life.
How the hell have you made my life better? Well, for starters, you're on vacation.
And you're already getting the basis of a really nice tan.
There's only one way to find out the truth.
Cuff links? That's what's in the box? You are lucky that I got to you first, amigos.
Because if you were to try to pass this off to Pablo, when he thought he was getting the engraving plates, you would have a serious problem.
Well, as I said, we're just down here for pop.
Can we go now? Yes.
But forget about your delicious soda, straighten out your flight plan, and leave before something muy malo happens to you guys.
That's exactly what we're going to do, Lloyd.
Thank you, Lamas.
May I? Thank you for your time.
Shawn, I can't believe you made me stop and pick up these chickens.
Look, Jules, you can't find prices like this in the states.
We actually would've lost money by not buying them.
Chickens, son.
My God, my mom is gonna be so devastated when she learns the truth about Lloyd.
People aren't always as they seem.
I mean, look at me.
I seem like this great dad and whatnot.
The truth is I abandoned my family.
- I'm a black stereotype.
- Wow.
So many things wrong with that statement, I don't even know where to begin.
Actually, that's not true at all.
You're no one's father.
Shawn, it's semantics.
- No, it's not semantics.
- Yes, it is, Shawn, it's se-- Would you two stop jabbering and start looking for Henry and Lloyd? Look, Lassiter did me a solid, and he's holding off the chief for 24 hours, so we have to find them.
You already told us that in the car, Jules.
Well, I need to cover my bases, guys.
For who? Think we need to go this way.
Yes, sir.
- Uh-huh.
Thank you.
- De nada.
Oh, Henry, you gotta try one of these.
San Carlos is known for its sopapillas.
I'm not hungry, Lloyd.
Mm, your taste buds will thank you.
See, what you do is you take a little honey, and you put it right in the middle, and bam! You are in Mexican pastry heaven.
I don't want any damn sopapillas, Lloyd.
What I want to know is how the hell we're gonna get outta here.
We have no car, no money no shoelaces.
I still don't understand why Lamas had to confiscate mine.
Oh, yeah, well, that's standard Mexican police procedure.
That's why whenever I'm down here, I make sure to wear loafers.
Well, that's a lot of help to me now.
- Thank you.
- Come on.
Come on.
Have a sopapilla.
Hi, I'm Mr.
Sopapilla.
I would like you to eat me.
Come on, eat me.
Eat me.
I smell something.
Battered fried sweet.
Sopapillas! Oh, my God.
Mm, one more.
- Come on, you know you want it.
- No.
And why are you still wearing that stupid jacket in this heat? It's like a steam bath down here.
Take it off.
Call me old-fashioned, but I believe a man should look well-dressed wherever he happens to be.
Whatever.
Don't worry, Henry.
We're gonna get out of this.
Something will happen.
It always does.
You see? - Dos, por favor.
- No mas.
Hombre! - That's - Man! In Spanish.
What? Was your last customer American? - Amer--Americano? - Si, compre seis.
Ah.
I have no idea what he's saying.
What did he look like? Muy elegante.
- That's Lloyd.
- Uh-huh.
And was he with another man? El baldo? Wearing a, uh, camiseta Costco? Si.
Donde? Yeah, yeah.
Gra--gracias.
Gracias.
Are you thinking what I'm thinking? Do they observe the 10-second rule down here? - Oh, no.
- Yeah.
Stop it.
Lloyd.
- Pablo.
- Nunez.
It is so good to see you, my friend.
You too.
- Is that what I think it is? - Yes, sir.
Is that the package have been searching so intently for? Yes.
And by "yes," he means it's "a package," not necessarily "the package.
" Lloyd I ask you to bring me something really important.
Something other men have died trying to get their hands on.
And you totally delivered! Yeah! Wait-- All you really ever wanted was a pair of crappy cufflinks? Crappy? Uh, please, Pablo.
My friend Henry doesn't understand how valuable those are to you.
These cufflinks belonged to my father, a poor, hard-working man who always taught me to do the honest thing.
It's not his fault I never listened.
I crack them up.
Anyway his dying wish was to be buried wearing these cufflinks.
He believed a man should look his best, wherever he may be.
Couldn't agree more.
At the funeral, some lowdown dog stole them off my father's body.
Probably my cousin Pedro.
Or my other cousin Pedro.
Or his daughter, Pedrita.
They have been missing for years.
When Lloyd told me he could track them down, I say, "This is impossible.
" Well, here they are.
Tell me, who did you have to kill to get these? Oh, no, no.
It mostly involved googling, trolling around on eBay.
But the point is you have them back, and my debt to you is forgiven, yes? Consider it paid in full, amigo.
Oh, that is wonderful news.
Do you hear that, Henry? My--my slate has finally been wiped clean.
That's great.
Uh, Lloyd, could we go now? Go? No, no, we must celebrate.
I have a feast prepared.
I just installed a discotheque in my basement.
No, you are staying the night as my guests.
Well, that sounds really tempting, but my truck is parked at a meter, and I-- You refusing my hospitality? What Henry meant was, uh, we would love to stay, wouldn't we, Henry? I never say no to disco.
Vamonos.
- What does that mean? - Payaso.
- What's a payaso? - I have no idea.
Detective Lamas.
Juliet O'Hara, Santa Barbara P.
D.
We would like to report a kidnapping.
Really? Of who? - Our fathers.
Our padres.
- Did you see this happen? No, but we have strong reason to believe they were taken.
We would really appreciate it if you would run a check on all late-model Range Rovers in the area.
I am sorry.
There is no evidence to warrant such a search, and my staff is overworked as it is.
Ah.
Enjoy that age.
It's a great one.
What grade is your son in? - Second? - He does not go to school.
He is too busy making those sneakers you're wearing.
I kid you.
- He's a doctor.
- Oh.
I kid you again.
You're so gullible.
Detective Lamas, I did see it happen.
But not with these eyes.
With this one.
Shawn Spencer, psychic.
El psychico? I do not believe in such things.
Contrary to your stereotype of Mejicanos, we are not all superstitious idiots who stand at the window looking out for the Chupacabra.
Hey, who does he remind you of? - Eric Estrada? - No.
The Mexican version of Lassiter.
Eh.
I gotta figure out a way to get him to help us.
I'm getting some very powerful psychic vibrations about the people in this room.
For starters, Detective Ortiz is about to go into a diabetic coma.
- You ate sugar? - I only had one bite.
- Guzman is back on caffeine.
- Can't help it.
Get sleepy.
And there is not one, but dos inter-office romances happening here.
And both of them involve Detective Lamas.
A married man.
Diablo.
Si.
Nice to meet you.
Giant clown gloves.
Finally, a housewarming gift we can use.
They're oven mitts.
I am also sensing that Detective Lamas has not been truthful with us.
Our fathers, our padres were here, weren't they? Your skills are very impressive.
Okay, I admit it.
They were here earlier, and if they were kidnapped, it was probably by Pablo Nunez.
It is widely known Pablo has been seeking the engraving plates stolen from the U.
S.
Mint.
And I believe that Lloyd and um, the bald one were trying to fool Pablo into believing they have the plates.
Do you have an address for this "Pabla" Nunez? Pablo lives in a compound guarded by his own personal army.
We could really use your help in getting our fathers out of there.
That I cannot do.
I cannot risk the lives of my men, however, if you were to find out that the plates were on the premises, I could call in reinforcements.
I see.
And I take it this Pablo Nunez's compound is located at this "Las Gravedas"? - Gravedas.
- Grav--grav-daz? - Gravedas.
- Gramedes.
- Gravedas.
- Gravedas.
Yes.
"Jess"? - Yes.
- I believe it's a soft "J.
" - Yes.
- And it's located there.
- No.
- Mm.
That is where Pablo's men shoot his enemies and bury them.
Usually first thing in the morning.
While the Chupacabra sleeps.
Well, that's great.
Thank you for the hospitality.
It was wonderful.
I gotta say I had a really great time.
That lobster thermador-- oh, it practically melted in my mouth.
Are you sure you don't want to stay any longer? - Well - We could play tennis, have a swim, and it's Tuesday, which is the night we play celebrity.
Oh, I love that game.
Yeah, well, we really have to get back.
Let's go, Henry.
All right.
It's been a pleasure.
- Amigo.
- Come back anytime.
- You.
- Yes.
- Stay out of trouble, huh? - I'll--I'll try.
- Thank you again.
- Adios.
Jeez, what's the rush? - Is that-- - Shh, shh.
The stolen engraving plates.
I came across them when I was looking for the bathroom.
Lamas didn't know that Pablo already had them.
Wait, wait, you stole the engraving plates from Pablo Nunez? Are you out of your mind? At first I was afraid to take them, but then I said, "What would Henry do in this situation?" So, I did it, I took them.
I knew you'd be proud.
Run! Hey! Hey! Serpico, Henry! - Serpentine, you idiot! - Oh.
Figure eight! Let's get to the truck, the truck! Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa! What're you waiting for? Let's go, let's go! Ah--I never learned a stick.
What, you can fly a plane, but you can't handle a stick? No.
Move over.
- Careful, I have-- - Okay, okay.
- I got it.
I got it.
- Ow, ow.
Whoa.
Oh, hey, Nacho.
Oh! I should make you dig yours and mine for getting us into this mess.
I don't know if this is the appropriate time to be pointing fingers, Henry.
When exactly would be the appropriate time, Lloyd? We're about to die.
I usually don't come out for the killings, which shows you how special you are to me, Lloyd.
And Henry, I was only starting to get to know you, but I was impressed with the dance moves last night on the dance floor.
- What was that dance? - Cabbage patch.
Yes, cabbage patch.
Chico and Nacho can't stop.
All right, so what are we gonna do? - What's your plan? - What? What's the plan? There's no plan.
But I'm open to suggestions.
What are your thoughts? Me? You're the expert in this situation.
All right.
I'll come up with something.
Well? I've got nothing.
Total blank.
- What do you see? - Uh Lloyd and my father are digging their own graves.
It's grim.
But Pablo's henchmen appear to be doing the cabbage patch.
Okay, we don't have a lot of time, what's the plan? Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold up.
Pablo has the engraving plates.
Oh, gosh.
Uh, Juliet, I know this looks bad.
So, I'm gonna just tell you the truth.
I was down here doing this gentleman's taxes.
Oh, save it, Lloyd.
I know about your gambling.
You told her? When did I have time to do that, Lloyd? Uh, palo, I noticed that there are two graves dug here, and yet there are five of us.
Obviously, you will have to share.
Yes, but I think I speak for the group when I say who shares with who? - I am not going with Lloyd.
- Why do you hurt me? Considering that Juliet and I are the lone couple in the group, I think it's only fair - that we have our own grave.
- Excuse me.
After all we've been through, I've earned the right to rest beside you just as much as Jules.
All right, look, if nobody wants to take Gus, I'll take him, Lloyd, why don't you go with those two? Man, I'm nobody's charity case.
I demand to dig my own grave.
Enough! No more stalling.
I've been out here too long already.
Fine.
Give this to my son.
Tell him I was brave.
Okay.
You come with us, buddy.
We'll probably go three across.
Get in the graves! Seems like aI don't know if this is a jump, or-- Mexican Lassie! Mexican Lassie.
Way better than American Lassie, by the way.
- Not unlike Coca-Cola.
- That's why you were stalling.
How did you know Lamas would show up? - Shawn texted me.
- When? We've been held at gunpoint the whole time.
I managed to do it while Pablo and his henchmen were doing the cabbage patch.
Uh, can I get my watch back? Because of you, Pablo left his compound and gave us the opportunity to arrest him and recover the engraving plates.
I've contacted your embassy, and they are sending officials to get the plates as we speak.
Well, it looks like our work here is done.
Now, if you don't mind, I have a family to get back to.
Via tostitos, Mexican Lassie.
Stop calling me that.
Can I talk to you for one second? Lloyd, no, you lied to my mom.
You're no better than Frank.
Okay, look, I know you're upset with me.
And I--I don't blame you.
But all I ever wanted to do was be the man you thought I was, the man I tried to become after meeting your mother.
Um, would you-- would you mind if we didn't tell your mom about any of this? She's the best thing that ever happened to me.
Well, you did recover the plates.
I guess that does count for something.
All right, I will keep this to myself.
For now.
But, Lloyd, I'm watching you, and I promise, if you ever-- Done.
No more.
No more.
No, I swear.
I will try to convince the judge in Santa Barbara to waive the charges for stealing the Cadillac and crossing the border illegally, but you have to take that plane back to where it belongs.
- Okay, that's--I promise.
- O-okay.
That is terrific.
Okay, I need a copilot.
Who wants to go with me? No way in hell.
Sensitive guy.
I'm gonna file a flight plan.
Be right back.
You all right? You know, when we get back to the United States of America, I'm gonna set up a little lunch for those two.
Or we'll just--we'll let nature take its course.
Thank God you're okay.
I'm fine, I'm fine.
Well, when you didn't meet us at the eye doctor, we came looking for you.
Detective Lassiter explained everything.
We've been so worried about you.
What I did, leaving like that without calling you, that was wrong.
I'm sorry I left, buddy.
- I'll never do it again.
- Whatever.
Why don't we go home, and spend a quiet night together? Just the three of us.
Great.
Good.
All right, all right, gracias.
Wow.
I didn't know you spoke Portuguese.
It's the police in San Carlos.
It's Lloyd.
Oh, my God, what happened? Did his plane crash? He didn't make it onto the plane.
He stole the engraving plates from the cops and disappeared.
I cannot believe that he lied to me.
He lied to all of us.
He looked me in the eye and told me that he had changed.
- What kind of a man does that? - Whoa, hold on, hold on.
Let's think about this for a second.
Lloyd's a free man, right? He cheats debt, so he turns around and steals evidence from the police? That doesn't make any sense.
Hell, even Frank wouldn't do something like that.
The shooter at the mailbox place worked for Lamas.
Man! That means Mexican Lassiter's corrupt.
Mexican me? The hell are you blabbering about, Spencer? Call the airport.
Tell 'em to get a plane ready.
What? - Don't tell me what to do.
- Lloyd's being framed! We're going back to old Mexico! - Dude, you don't have to come.
- Yes, I do.
Man, you have a serious problem.
I know.
Tell me what you know, Mr.
Spencer.
Lamas has been looking for the plates the whole time.
He sent his deputies to Santa Barbara to intercept them from Lloyd.
But what Lamas didn't know was that Pablo already had them.
And thanks to us, Lamas ended up with-- - Lamas.
- That's what I said, Shawn.
- Lamas-- - Lamas.
- Will you stop it? - Focus.
Lamas ended up with them.
But he still needed a patsy to pin the theft of the plates on.
And who better than Lloyd? A U.
S.
citizen with a gambling problem.
We've been investigating Lamas for crimes on both sides of the border-- robbery, extortion, and murder.
He's a ruthless killer.
It's been two hours since we got the call that Lloyd stole the plates.
You need to prepare yourself that your stepfather may already be dead.
I don't know about that.
Lloyd has a way of getting out of tight places.
Could I ask you guys a question? Are you two guys happy in your work? I mean, is this-- is this where you thought you'd be two years ago? You know, same old rut, and making people dig their own graves, and then shooting them? I mean, I'm sure Lamas has promised you some of that money he's gonna print with the engraving plates.
Oh, come on, guys.
I mean, look who's out here doing the dirty work.
You two deserve your fair share.
Am I wrong here? I see Lloyd.
He's alive.
Here.
Oh, no.
Lloyd! There they go! Stay inside! Go, go, go! Through here.
Oh, no.
Aw, damn you, Lloyd.
Even though you put me through hell the last two days, they were some of the best I've had in years.
I felt alive.
It's not easy for me to make friends, but that's what you were to me.
A friend.
A damn good one.
Gonna miss you, buddy.
Uh, Lloyd? Yeah, Shawn? What the hell-- What you just said about me, I feel the same way about you.
Uh--you--I What is that? A bulletproof vest? How long have you had that on? Oh, this? Oh, I've had this the whole time.
You don't think I would come down to such a dangerous place without protection, do you? I did.
If it makes you feel better, I was gonna pick you up one, but I just-- I don't know your size.
Absolutely unbelievable.
I thought about giving you mine, but I-- well, I figured you'd be okay.
You're absolutely unbelievable.
Hey.
Hey, excuse me.
You took a shot at point blank.
You recovered.
I don't have your healing powers! Are you mad? Are you mad? Are you? Sensitive guy, eh? I'm just glad this whole thing is over, and you're okay.
I need to tell you something.
I haven't been completely honest.
The truth is, I was pretty freaked out about this whole instant family thing.
- Oh, Gus-- - Let me finish.
I wasn't ready to be a father.
I was afraid that I might be a colossal failure.
But after watching Henry and Lloyd over these past few days, and seeing how well Shawn and Juliet-- well, Juliet turned out, in spite of who raised her, I realized there's a huge margin for error.
What I'm saying is I'm fully onboard now.
I'm ready to get up in there.
Let's do this.
Whoa, Gus, slow down.
Maximus isn't even close to being ready for you to be his dad.
As far as he's concerned, you're just a friend building a shelving unit in my house.
Really? Yeah.
Wait a second.
Does that mean I really have to build that shelving unit? - Yeah.
- Oh - And clean out the garage.
- Man! Okay, shower caddy from McNab, keep or return? Well, we could use it to store the his and hers exfoliating bath gloves in pink and baby blue that Gus gave us.
I say keep.
You said anything to your mom about all the stuff that went down in Mexico? I think Lloyd meant it when he said he really loves her.
Just gonna keep my mouth shut.
For now.
You know, in spite of everything, I still think it would've been cool if my dad and Lloyd had become BFFs.
- Ain't gonna happen.
- Yeah.
Nature wins again.
I can't believe I'm saying this, but I'm glad we're gonna be family one day, Lloyd.
Oh, what a nice-- I feel the same way, Henry.
Is this a bulletproof vest? You think I'd ever hang out with you again without one? Heh.
That's good thinking.
Which reminds me, I have one small favor to ask-- Lloyd.
Could you pass me a Coke Zero? Thank you.
Which reminds me, Henry, um, have you ever been to a cock fight? I know this guy down in Encinata-- - Lloyd.
- Okay.