Regency House Party (2004) s01e03 Episode Script

Episode 3 & 4

1 What can you expect? Bottoms up.
A storm is brewing as a wealthy heiress joins the party I am a bit flirtatious, but, hey, rules are made to be broken.
A handsome rival returns I think Mr.
Carrington will break my heart.
The men conduct a secret fight This is highly illegal.
And one lady breaks all the rules.
Breast, anyone? At the Regency House Party.
I'm watching.
WNET/THIRTEEN NEW YORK This program was made possible by contributions to your PBS station from: This week in the Regency House, the gentlemen are sneaking off for a secret meeting in the woods.
They've got an appointment with their personal trainer, Professor Radford, and local boxing champion Tim Dean, otherwise known as the Kentchurch Bruiser.
And then suddenly Right.
Have you clapped yet? Notice the power of the blow Professor Radford is an expert in Regency sport and has a proposition for the gentlemen that they cannot disclose to the other guests.
Jesus, Mr.
Dean This is man's territory, and we're going to talk about the "fancy.
" The fancy are the center of sporting excitement, sporting risk and daring.
If we are able to get, um, two distinguished fighters We have two fighters.
I know of another fighter who might be willing to take on our own local champion.
The prizefight, with its celebration of blood and violence, had fascinated men of all classes throughout the 18th century.
But women didn't like it and nor, increasingly, did the law.
were to come with their law enforcement officers and take you into custody, the ladies would not be pleased.
So the ladies do not know but nobody knows they're essentially illegal.
One two For the ladies in the house, life is one long round of trimming bonnets and dance lessons.
Although they've come to find a husband, Regency routine deprives them of the gentlemen's company for most of the day.
This is making it hard for the chaperones to matchmake.
Well, you said you thought the countess and Mr.
Gorell Barnes were a foregone conclusion.
The whole point of a Regency house party of this sort, then, was to get a husband and the best possible husband you could get.
One, two, three The girls would all be in competition with each other trying to secure the best marriage they possibly can.
The chaperones would be in competition with each other.
The lack of romance means loss of money.
Some chaperones were paid to secure the most advantageous marriage for their charge.
No match meant no fee.
A letter for Mrs.
Rogers.
To make matters worse, news has arrived of some serious competition: good news for the gentlemen, bad news for the ladies, and disastrous for the chaperones.
"Dearest Mrs.
Rogers, I hope you will forgive my boldness, "but the presence of Miss Tanya Samuel "is sure to be a welcome addition to your proceedings.
"Her beauty, confidence and honesty "make her invigorating company.
She remains, however, unattached.
" I'm making no plans to be agreeable to this young lady.
With your charge's interest paramount, I know I'm not going to like her.
I shall make sure I don't like her.
My name's Tanya Samuel, and I am a modern-day girl who lives a modern-day life.
I've got this theory that if you can't wear denim to a job, then it's not worth doing it.
"Rules of behavior for ladies: "You must conform to the wishes of your hostess.
" That depends, doesn't it? That really depends.
In the modern world, Miss Samuel runs a successful fashion business.
She has a strong sense of her own worth, especially when it comes to men.
I'm the type of woman that believes that a man, if they want to take you out, they should take you out.
If I go out on a date with anybody and on that first date I'm expected to pay half the bill, then I would never see that person ever again.
"Her beauty, confidence and honesty make her invigorating company.
" She's been the toast of the capital What does she want to come here for then? Miss Samuel's luggage is sent on ahead.
A wealthy heiress and a beauty as well, she enters the house at the top of the pecking order, a prize catch for any of the gentlemen.
The master of the house, Mr.
Gorell Barnes, wants his new guest to be warmly received.
I think that we should all try and welcome her After all, with her fortune and looks, she could make him the perfect wife.
Sensing their hostility, he's meeting with the chaperones in their inner sanctum.
Where are you going to put her, Mrs.
Rogers? Um who could double up? The countess has stacks of room.
We can all move in with the countess.
But well, I've got I've got the biggest room, but you can't all move in with me.
I've got the biggest bed as well.
I presume that she she would have her own room, being of her wealth and status.
Yeah, that's what I would have said.
What would you think if we made this into a bedroom? I mean, I don't know how often you use it.
About as often as you use the billiard room.
It's quite nice to have this room.
Yeah.
One option is just not having her.
It absolutely stinks that somebody walks in and everybody has to shuffle around like crabs.
There are eight other summer parties going on; you'd be honored that she'd chosen ours.
You'd go, "Brilliant, wonderful, let's make every effort we can to ensure that she has a nice time.
" I'll leave it in your capable hands.
Yeah.
Okay? Okay.
She's got birds in there.
A bit strange, isn't it? No one else brought pets with them.
We could let the cat out.
Right, everyone, um, just to officially announce that Miss Samuel will be joining us, um, to stay for the remainder of our stay.
And there's been some, um, accommodation rearranging.
And what we've we're in the process of organizing is for Miss Hopkins and Miss Francesca to move into the countess's bedroom and the countess to move into Miss Hopkins' bedroom.
And then Miss Samuel will have Miss Francesca's bedroom.
The biggest loser in the reshuffle is real-life Countess Griaznov.
her title has secured her the grandest room in the house.
Well, I think maybe we should keep our own chamber pot.
I'll carry that then, shall I? I mean, I'm not happy, because my room is beautiful, and it's one of the big joys of being here is waking up in it every morning.
Just it is gorgeous.
Um, but, yeah The new guest is a potential rival for the heart of Mr.
Gorell Barnes, a gentleman whom the countess rightly regards as her natural partner.
I get on very well with Mr.
Gorell Barnes.
Feel like we're head girl and head boy in a strange sort of way, and Mrs.
Rogers is headmistress.
And to cap it all, Miss Samuel's lovebirds have no respect for the countess's rank.
And my new room is just above the new, evil, screechy birds.
I wasn't feeling particularly well disposed to her My philosophy on the birds is it's cruel to keep them caged; we should just eat them instead on toast.
Of all the chaperones, Mrs.
Enright has the most cause to feel threatened by the new girl.
Her charge, Miss Conick, is at the bottom of the pile.
Now her prospects of marriage seem remoter than ever.
She was a bit upset when she heard that there's another girl arriving.
I said, "Why are you upset?" "Well," she said, "I don't quite know why.
" "Why is that?" "I don't know, dear.
I'm honestly just upset for you.
" And I went, "I'm not upset.
" Intelligent, beautiful, and wealthy right up my street.
The master comes to inspect the room the chaperones have arranged for Miss Samuel.
He is not impressed.
I think it's pretty horrible, and I think it would be unfair if she was put in here, so my suggestion is to change which I'm going to obviously run by with Mrs.
Rogers, but it's to change Mrs.
Rogers' boudoir into her bedroom, and then I think, the countess will go back to her room, Miss Hopkins will have her room again, and Miss Francesca will be back here.
So, I think it was a mistake, which will cause a big flare-up again, I'm sure.
People are being difficult about her, I think.
what she's going to let herself in for, does she? Once again it's all change.
At the master's insistence, the hostess gives up her bedroom and moves into the boudoir.
I should feel the bed.
Yes, very important the bounce.
I mean, my other room was quite a lot bigger, but I suppose it's quite odd that I've the one who's changed, which you wouldn't do in real life, would you? You wouldn't give up your own bedroom.
I was going to say "Welcome to the asylum," but maybe I shouldn't; maybe that'll frighten her too much.
After days of unrest, sparked by news of her visit, West Indian heiress Miss Samuel finally arrives at the Regency House.
Oh, they're throwing rose petals, red rose petals as she walked up the drive.
So I've decided for the next four weeks, I am going to throw rose petals at her feet wherever she walks, I've decided.
And she is funny.
Well, I'd hardly regard this as good news.
Thank you.
Afternoon.
My first impression of the house very grand and very very, very strange.
Everything is done for you and you're literally waited on hand and foot, which is something that I could get used to.
And I don't know quite how I'm going to be received by the other guests because I'm very, very privileged, just under the countess.
I have taken upon myself for the next four weeks to go and gather rose petals and throw them at her feet.
My God, how unfair is that? That's the kind of romance that's lacking from my life.
She doesn't need deportment lessons, that's for sure.
No, she doesn't; she could teach us a thing or two.
Just hope she has the personality to match.
I think my game's gone off slightly.
It's a great opportunity to really experience living the life of a black heiress.
It's just nice to be able to actually enter into a house of affluence, and not being a maid or a slave for that matter.
Although much of Britain's wealth came from the slave economy, there were prominent black people in Regency society.
Queen Charlotte herself was rumored to come from black descent.
Because I'm the sort of, if you like, new kid on the block with all this luxury and privilege, I'm feeling a bit disadvantaged, funnily enough, with all my advantages.
That's kind of a bit daunting, really.
Regency Britain hardly embraced racial equality.
But it had a healthy respect for money, and wealthy plantation owners and their nonwhite children were admitted into society and often considered a great social catch.
This is the countess.
Hello, nice to meet you.
And Miss Braund.
Nice to meet you.
Then we've got Mr.
Foxsmith.
Hello, nice to meet you.
Mr.
Everett.
Hi.
And Captain Glover naval captain, so that's quite smart, much smarter than an army captain.
I'm distressed at your immediate lack of concern for your interest in my charge.
My immediate lack of interest You're instantly attracted, I saw.
I don't know, would you like a drink or cup of tea or something? Provincial life in Regency England could be dull, predictable and very isolating.
Any new guest of rank was inevitably the source of much speculation and excitement.
The gentlemen are going to leave you to get to know each other, so, um, hope you feel welcome.
And do you like your bedroom? It's gorgeous, thanks.
Good.
Lovely.
Okay, see you later.
As the guests proceed to dinner, there's a new order of precedence.
The host takes Miss Samuel on his arm in place of the countess.
In front of our host, we have a turtle soup, and in front of our hostess we have a callaloo soup, which is pork, crabmeat and spicy vegetables.
This is our Caribbean-dinner evening in, uh, Miss Samuel's honor to welcome her to Kentchurch.
We will be eating sort of sweet Caribbean foods.
Dinner during the Regency was served à la française.
Rather than a series of courses, sweet and savory dishes were laid out on the table and eaten together.
Emphasis was placed on the decorative, by the Prince Regent's French chef, Antoine Carême, large and elaborate sugar sculptures adorn the table as centerpieces.
It's a very controversial scene.
It's a a slave plantation, yes.
The sugar? Yes, sugar that employed slaves Although the trade in slaves was abolished in 1807, many of Britain's great country estates were built up on the income from slave-produced sugar, including this one.
Now with an abolitionist in the house, the guests must confront the truth behind their lavish lifestyle.
You know, once the slaves were captured, the, uh, masters used to try to dehumanize the the slaves in order to ensure that they became subservient.
So they'd be stripped of their names.
They'd be Sometimes the males would be killed Sometimes the babies were thrown overboard and lots of horrific things.
I just can't feel guilt or shame or anything for something that I'd never done and ever wanted to do.
I can't be guilty for our history.
Of course slavery was wrong, but who discusses it as much as we English, Who said it was rude to talk politics at the table? It is rude.
Did you enjoy the sugar? You prefer honey, though.
Um, I do prefer honey, absolutely, as Mr.
Gorell Barnes knows.
How much do you have there? Fifty.
Okay, so if I give you, um Early the next morning, preparations for the bareknuckle prizefight get under way.
I'm sure you understand the motivation Captain Glover has put up the purse money for the Kentchurch Bruiser.
I'm going to put you through your paces this morning.
You're fighting tomorrow, so I take it that what we do today shouldn't be too strenuous.
There's been a challenge from another part of the land laid down, so it's a matter of pride and honor.
You know, you want your local guy to win, so we're investing time and money in his training to make sure he's in peak condition to ensure victory.
Stand still.
Since the beginning, Tim Dean has been a gentlemen's personal trainer.
He has subjected them to a punishing regime.
Now Captain Glover is funding the Kentchurch Bruiser, he's turning the tables on his instructor.
I want you to run across there, pick up a shovelful of horse manure and deposit it here.
Knees up, knees up.
Stand in front of you.
Deposit.
Good.
Knees up, knees up, knees up.
Excellent, excellent.
30 stones, 30 yards, in the barrel as quickly as you can.
Go! This is good for your wind, Mr.
Dean.
How are you feeling, Mr.
Dean? Is that what I think it is, sir? One aspect of their training is particularly grueling.
What are you trying to do, make us sick or something? Purging the body with an emetic to induce vomiting.
Now Tim Dean gets a taste of his own medicine.
How do you feel? Do you mind if we stand back? And maybe tell you what was in the drink.
Just orange juice.
Do you think I'd make you feel sick before a match? Breakfast.
The issue of sugar crops up again.
During the Regency, the campaign to abolish slavery gave rise to a new form of political pressure.
The public was urged to boycott plantation products until slaves were free.
There's an address to the people about suggestion of boycotting sugar and tobacco.
"The family that uses five pounds of sugar per week "will be abstaining from the consumption 21 months "to prevent the slavery or murder of one fellow creature.
" Perhaps we'll do it for 24 hours sugar.
24 hours? Make it a Okay, well, I'm willing to make that token.
I think we'd all very well do without four puddings a day, except Mrs.
Rogers, who likes them.
We'll all abstain from sugar for 24 hours.
I was going to say that.
I think that if we are supposed to be a fashionable house, well, I don't think it's actually going to kill anybody to to to make a gesture.
It doesn't bother me, because I like neither sugar nor tobacco.
People have to decide for themselves.
That's what I'd like done in this house.
I would like people to abstain from sugar and tobacco.
I think it should be to people's discretion and most people will do it, given a choice.
I'm going to say that there will be no sugar.
Was there anyone who didn't want to do it? It wasn't an issue of they didn't want to do it.
It was more they thought they should have a personal choice.
So Miss Hammond, I think, had a problem with the fact that somebody made a decision for her.
But then, you're in a household, so you would be kicked out if you didn't do it.
As much as it is a really good debate, there was something far more important.
Let me read on, okay.
"News has reached the capital "that Mr.
Austin Howard "is said to be back in England after a stint in Europe.
" Yeah, basically there's a really fit bloke "His reputation precedes him.
"He's been in and out of the scandal sheets.
" "His attention to style has been noted.
" Something of a dandy.
In the Regency House, the ladies are all aflutter.
Musician and dandy Mr.
Austin Howard has arrived.
Well, well.
Famed for their wit, dandies were invited to house parties to charm and amuse the ladies.
How wonderful a greeting.
Regency pinups, they were feted like pop stars.
Such gaiety.
Everyone's very excited about your arrival.
Without money or status, there were few opportunities for black people to enter society.
Musical talent offered a rare way in.
There's a definite lack of musical talent in the house.
Is there indeed? Do you play the piano? Uh, no, but I'm going to have My quartet will be arriving shortly.
Well, I'd like to introduce you to everybody.
So, what did you think of Mr.
Austin Howard, then? Um Marks out of ten? An 11.
Really? G.
B.
's only an eight.
I was going to say 12, actually.
Twelve? There you go.
Miss Victoria, 12.
Twelve? A 12! Well, I would like the opportunity to get to know him better, but at the moment he's an 8½.
Hi.
The arrival of an attractive gentleman is a sharp reminder the main objective of a house party bagging a husband.
How are you? That was some welcome you got.
Kind of romance issue is not being addressed.
We don't really have that much opportunity Firstly, I think we kind of girls came in here and said, "You know, if it doesn't happen naturally, And the chaperones are saying, "How on earth can we control, "you know, kind of strong, independent, successful women? They're not going do as we tell them to do.
" Then we'll have a jolly good time.
We are going to have a very good time, actually.
We're having a good time; we'll have an even better time now.
The chaperones should really be encouraged to do a lot more chaperoning and a lot more orchestrating meetings with their charges and and the gentlemen.
Do you Can I just ask, do you mean do you mean orchestrating chaperoned time or orchestrating unchaperoned time? Well, I think I think what should happen is that we can go out with the chaperone with the man and the chaperone could, um yeah, exactly, like, "sprain the ankle.
" It's from the ladies.
Oh, yes? "The dandy will be entertaining the chaperones from 3:00 p.
m.
, "therefore leaving the ladies unsupervised.
"Fancy meeting up for a few cheeky lemonades? "Please reply ASAP to Miss Hopkins "should you choose to accept our invitation.
Fondest regards, the girls.
" Hmm.
Before they can rendezvous with the ladies, the gentlemen are off on manly business.
They're inspecting a secret location for the fight.
Walk on.
Why is it such a secret event? It's something that the gentlemen get up to It wasn't considered a very gentlemanly thing to do Um, so they had to go in secret and dress down If you borrow some of Foxsmith's clothes Foxsmith might lend you some clothes.
The professor was telling us that sometimes up to 20,000 people will turn up at these sort events.
It's word of mouth, because it's highly illegal.
Bareknuckle boxing is against the law not because of its brutality, but because after the French Revolution, the authorities feared the mob.
It's almost like a 21st-century illegal rave, where all these people come and gather and they have a fight and they gamble and they drink and they do everything, but no one knows the location till the last minute.
To foil local magistrates, fights were staged on county boundaries.
If they intervened, the event simply continued across the border and out of their jurisdiction.
This is a far too ruffian event for the ladies to even consider or think about it.
It's much better it's kept out of their delicate eyes.
As the ladies set out to meet the gentlemen, Mr.
Howard has been asked to distract the chaperones.
"The charmed ocean's pausing" "and the waves lie still and gleaming, "and the lulled winds seem dreaming whose breasts are gently heaving" Isn't that charming? How nice it was to meet Mr.
Howard, who appears to be a charming, urbane, sophisticated and talented young man with marvelous manners.
"With a full but soft emotion.
" He's black there's no other way of saying that very handsomely black and with very, very charming manners, um, and a most alluring personality.
Are we being stood up here? If we have been stood up I will not be happy.
Ah-ha-ha, here we go.
Afternoon.
Afternoon, sirs.
Are we well? We are very well.
What do you think of Mr.
Howard? All right.
A bit freaked by our welcoming committee.
I thought it was quite funny.
We were thinking that we would at one point organize and this is where you come in, G.
B.
organize, like, a dinner for the chaperones, like, somewhere really far away.
Like London? That's about four days away.
Can we send them shopping for the day? Miss Samuel's initiative to encourage romance is going to plan, but unchaperoned, Regency decorum is soon abandoned.
We should all, like, squash the arms of the men I mean, something that you're not allowed to do.
Oh, my God, we've actually touched hands.
I like that you've taken off your jackets.
Miss Samuel had this idea: "We're going to go up "for an unchaperoned picnic with the boys.
"Don't tell the chaperones.
We're going to have gin and lemonade.
" And I was, like, "That's nice, but it's not really bad, is it?" I've got to do something much more extreme.
We've got to kind of lead this to another level of badness, because if the worst thing you can do is go without your bonnet or something, you know, that's not really kind of going for it.
During the Regency, black musicians performed throughout Europe's concert halls and opera houses.
Mr.
Howard's quartet is performing a Beethoven sonata.
Dawn.
Today, the gentlemen of the house will host the fancy, a sporting fraternity drawn to a remote corner of the Kentchurch estate by the promise of a prizefight.
Good morning, Professor.
Good morning, gentlemen, good morning.
Good to see you again.
Good to see you indeed.
The big day has now arrived.
In the Kentchurch Bruiser's camp, Captain Glover is leaving nothing to chance.
What's the good diet for this morning before the fight? With blows to the stomach and the solar plexus, the stomach might rebel, so I think a light breakfast.
There are bets within the bets that might be, within a round, who goes down first.
And who draws first blood who might lose a tooth.
The cook put some special formula into that breakfast, so there's no way you're going to be able to lose.
It's magic stuff.
Squeeze.
No, don't.
Can you crush an egg? I definitely have the advantage on the looks front, Oh, my God, it must be terrible.
For the time being, so The master has come to meet the fighter he's backing, Matt "Killer" Skelton.
It's almost like that, but they're all they're like that for the simple fact that obviously you you can grab as well, whereas in modern-day boxing, there's no holding.
In the modern world, the Killer is the heavyweight champion of all England a title that dates back to Regency times.
How's the how's the fights been recently? I've had seven bouts and seven wins, seven by K.
O.
They used to call me the, um the Grizzly Bear.
How much do you weigh? At the minute, I'm 18 stone.
And do you know how much Dean weighs? I think he's slightly under.
I think fitness, really, is on my side.
So, for the sake of our wagers, when do you think you're going to get him? Hopefully, I would have exhausted him Why not just go for the kill in the beginning, just knock him out, first round? The fancy embraced sporting enthusiasts from all classes of society.
The Regent himself was a devotee, but so were servants and even highwaymen.
Fantastic.
Bruiser! Bruiser! The Regency was an age of gambling mania.
Gentlemen risked vast fortunes and dismissed their losses with an attitude bordering on the cavalier.
Five five I'll take the first blood.
That's it, I'm closing this book.
Gentlemen of the fancy, the first fighter to make his appearance Bruiser! Bruiser! Will be your local hero and champion Bruiser! Bruiser! The Kentchurch Bruiser! Bruiser! Bruiser! And now, gentlemen, the challenger will arrive from across a boundary.
Give him a Kentchurch welcome, gentlemen.
Like music, boxing was another area of Regency life in which black men flourished, and some of the most famous fighters of the age former slaves became household names.
Bruiser! Bruiser! Bruiser! The favorite tonight, despite what you all think about your local lad, is the Killer Matthew "Killer" Skelton from Virginia in the United States.
Now, many of us many of us still regard it as "the colonies.
" They will come back into the empire.
It's only a matter of time before they realize the error of their ways.
Jeez! Oh, Bruiser! Bruiser! Fighters set to.
Regency boxing predated today's Queensberry rules.
Come on, Mr.
Dean! Come on, Bruiser! It combined punching with wrestling and was always bareknuckle.
Who wants to back the favorite? Who's going to show first blood? First blood! First blood! Time! Rounds continued until one man hit the ground.
Bruiser! Bruiser! Here they come.
Bruiser! Bruiser! Round 16.
Come on! Come on! Fights could last for hours and only ended when one of the pugilists was unable to walk up to the chalk square, hence the expression "squaring up.
" "The Kentchurch fancy, 22nd of July, 1811.
" Bruiser! Bruiser! Bruiser! "There's more at stake in this fancy "than the considerable purse of 200 guineas that of national pride.
" "To tumultuous applause from a strong loop of pride, the combatants set to.
" Foul! "A foul was called "after Skelton was seen smashing Dean's head against the ring's post.
" We'll need the second umpire.
Yes or no? Yes or no? Foul! Yeah! As the Bruiser and the Killer slug it out, the gloves are also coming off back at the house.
Hi, Mrs.
Rogers.
Determined to attract the master's attention, the countess approaches her chaperone with an immodest proposal.
And I know you'll appreciate this because, as we've discussed before, we're both very good girls at school.
The thing with very good girls is that when they're bad They are very, very bad.
Yes, absolutely.
with this very Regency Regency idea, but only one that can be played by a lady of very, very high status.
So, the precedent for it is that very naughty lady, Lady Caroline Lamb, who, over dinner apparently, either at Lord Melbourne's or at some other country house, served herself up as one of the courses.
Yes, I'm feeling faint, I'm feeling faint! But My first thought is, "What was she wearing?" Well, "Not very much" is the answer, because she was meant to be eaten.
So she will be covered I'm delighted to hear that.
But by fruits, vines, etc.
And apparently she came in on a silver platter, but I don't know if we could quite manage that.
But you must be decent.
I mean, she presumably must have been married when she did it.
Mmm, so I will have I will be covered.
So you've got to be relatively careful that you are not so shocking that you become unmarriageable.
Yes, that's true.
Come on, Yankee! Come on! Leave your man down.
He's going to get up.
Leave your man down.
The Kentchurch Bruiser did not come to scratch on time.
Gentlemen, I authorize the purse holder to hand over his 200 guineas to today's victor, Matt Skelton.
Killer well done, sir.
Fantastic fight.
Fantastic fight.
Fantastic fight.
Mr.
Gorell Barnes is is a very attractive man.
And he looks fantastic in his Mr.
Darcy outfit, I have to say very decorative and elegant.
is very against the idea of men and women just being friends and and talking to each other a lot.
And I think, yeah, we're still kind of quite playful, because you need a bit of excitement in the house, because otherwise, it is a bit boring.
You need someone to dress for dinner for.
How wonderful.
Definitely some people didn't even know it was me.
And then some were, like, "Is that the countess?" Oh, my God! Is that your real bust, then? I couldn't see people's reactions; I could just hear.
I just don't think they knew what to do with themselves.
Welcome to Disney, Princess.
I'm hoping the chaperone reaction isn't too extreme, because of course, it is very bad behavior.
Very seductive.
Very seductive, isn't she? Ladies and gents, shall we raise our glasses to the countess to drink to, uh rude food? Rude food.
I think everyone thinks the Regency is a very Jane Austen kind of time and everyone being prim and in bonnets, but then there were certain people who had a lot more fun.
Oi, oi, I'm watching.
The latest technology arrives at the Regency House.
The Regency was an age distinguished for applying scientific theory to practical use.
It saw the building of the first proper roads, railways and the high-pressure steam engine.
Even on the domestic level, there were very important breakthroughs.
This newfangled invention called a shower has arrived at Kentchurch Court.
It is literally the first time that I feel properly, properly clean in 6½ weeks.
For people who had only known the light of the sun and the flicker of candles and oil lamps, gaslights were awesome, even frightening.
By 1814, London's Piccadilly was lit up with gas, but only the more progressive houses had the new lights indoors.
"The gas not only burns with a lighted taper "it is brought into contact with, but it explodes with all the violence of gunpowder.
" And now I'm sitting in a house with one of these contraptions.
because these things are going to go poof and kill us all.
Sorry to bother you, sir.
A package has arrived.
Oh.
Thank you very much.
it's a fantastic white light comes out of that.
I think we could get up to some mischief with this, you know.
Scientists were becoming celebrities And scientific experiments became popular in the home.
Mr.
Gorell Barnes, I'd like to propose this gentleman Mr.
Foxsmith wants his Regency host to devote a week "Scientific experimentation gives a unique opportunity "for young men and women to cooperate unchaperoned.
"I'm sure this fact as well as your keenness for information Foxsmith has already been using science as a pretext to woo one lady in particular Chaperone Lady Devonport.
I do find other people's enthusiasms and passions very attractive.
That will help doing the experiments so we don't go blind, because that He's here because he is a scientist and he is interested in the sort of dawn of science as it was then.
Right, I feel some experiments coming on shortly.
Some explosive experiments, I hope.
Just fantastic rants they're very, very funny, they're absolutely marvelous.
But they might think they were slightly mad if you were someone who didn't appreciate just how colorful and delicious somebody being that kind of interested in something is.
What's the state of play with Lady Devonport? Eh, quite an old married couple by now.
Married couple by now, are they? I'm sure it'll be a long-standing affair.
Well, I mean, I know that comments were made about how public their affection for each other was becoming, um, but unfortunately, I'm not sure that I've noticed much curtailing of that public display.
They said they weren't going to curtail any public display.
Oh, dear, I think I've got a thorn.
Ordinarily, Lady Devonport and Mr.
Foxsmith should not be seen exchanging intimacies.
But the pursuit of science lends their growing relationship the veneer of respectability.
I can't breathe in this waistcoat.
Are they falling in love? I mean, I did I did think about this.
I think there would be a possibility that perhaps they would, yeah.
I think it would be rather sweet, because he's a bit bonkers and she's a bit bonkers, The logic was that the sun was always there; no matter which side of the Earth the sun was.
But in order to get darkness, a veil was drawn across it and there was tiny rips in that imperfect veil.
In those tiny rips the sun shone through, which is why you've got the stars.
"Imperfect veil.
" I love the idea of a ripped, imperfect veil.
To use that somehow, that you could peer through the veil and find find the things and, um, jewels of the sky Jewels in the sky, something like that.
Lady Devonport and Foxsmith are writing a tribute to their Regency counterparts, whose passion was to make sense of their world.
There's the Pleiades, and there's the Where knowledge was scarce, Regency scientists were not afraid to reach into the realms of the imagination.
"An aerial ballet every night, the theater of the skies "on an indigo velvet backdrop, its dance before our eyes, "Eternal light and loveliness, motion that won't fail, Looking up to heaven through the tears in the imperfect veil.
" Oh! All I've got to say is: Are you having a laugh? Regency menstruation is so not a good look.
It is disgusting, damp and unbearable.
I don't know how on earth they put up with it.
This is just not going to work because it does that and, um I'm sorry, but this it's just going to that it's going to last two minutes.
I was dreading this, and now I know why.
First of all I thought it'd be okay, but it is ridiculous.
I couldn't even put the thing on properly.
You've got to tie it, for crying out loud.
How on earth do they expect anybody Women often retreated to their rooms throughout menstruation, the excuse being given that they were "indisposed.
" Because we are both married ladies and very experienced married ladies, we'd like to tell you this evening about the birds and the bees.
the chaperones are giving their ladies a Regency biology lesson.
But before you even consider birds or bees, you must get a title.
It is the only thing that matters.
Where you get them from, it doesn't matter, but the older, the crummier, the nearer death the titleholder is, the more fun you will have.
I kind of have become kind of quite giggly and girlie It's like I have regressed into a childhood thing, and the idea of kind of being a sexually attractive woman to somebody, um it kind of doesn't sit right, it doesn't feel right, and, you know, I kind of find it quite disturbing that somebody may perceive me in that way.
Someone who certainly does see heiress Miss Hopkins in that way In Regency terms, they're a perfect match.
Well, it just happens that the first few days, me and Miss Hopkins sort of felt a connection, and, uh and it's really difficult talking with the guys, because I probably shouldn't be saying this, but, well, I'm a bit pissed, but you know, blatantly, me and Miss Hopkins have had a bit of a bit of a snog on a couple of occasions.
Now, we have here some little pieces of equipment you might think are little mini-reticules.
You'd be right, because they are.
They're handy for odd guinea Condoms were called "French letters," because they arrived flat in the post and were a defense against syphilis, the "French disease.
" They were only ever used with prostitutes.
Thankfully, no men in this house Oh, don't you believe it, Miss Hopkins.
Regency men were encouraged to be sexually active.
Their prospective wives, however, were not.
The more I learn about men, the more I just think, "You know what? I can't be bothered with you.
" Like, why does anyone ever get married? Goodness knows why they did in the Regency times, because you know, they'd be forced to have loads of children, so Well, not that they had much contraceptive choice anyway, but you know, the men would be desperately trying to produce No, thank you, I'll steer well clear of that.
The constraints placed on the women are felt all the more keenly because of their lack of physical activity something that was never a problem for Regency men.
Master of the house Mr.
Gorell Barnes has challenged his footmen to a game of Regency football.
Oh, we're going to slaughter them.
Very simple we'll just tell them to get out of the way.
If they have the ball, we'll tell them to stop.
We'll just take the ball and kick them in the goal.
It wasn't all plain sailing for the men.
The pressure was on to play hard and rough.
Excuse me! Wig off, that's a foul.
Are any of you bruised from your exertions? I've got a torn calf muscle, and I nearly fell off the horse this morning.
The first port of call in the event of injury would be the local bonesetter, or surgeon.
This is the amputation saw.
This is only for the bone.
Surgeons came in three classes: the educated elite, the doctor surgeon and the old-fashioned traveling surgeon, who might also be a barber or blacksmith.
Gallstones.
Indeed, sir, so you are you are well informed.
What are they for? Gallstones.
It is inserted until it reaches the bladder, and then upon reaching the bladder it is flipped over To lie against the base of the bladder, and we then take a suitable knife and cut you.
The best practitioners could have a stone out in a minute.
You have to operate quickly.
Because of the pain? That's right.
I have some gallstones.
Have you indeed? Yeah, I mean, if you want to Would any of you be bled? Bad blood was believed to be the root of all ills, so bloodletting became a common remedy.
The leeches will attend to any bruises.
Leeches were applied for everything fever or a hangover or even to freshen the body for spring.
Now we'll see whether he wants to play.
Oh, something's happening.
Do you feel a bite? Mmm, it's sort of a tickling bite.
Feeling it a bit? Fluffy.
Oh, that's it, yeah, he's engaged.
Has he bitten? Yeah, no, I feel that, definitely.
Is he heading for the kill? Can someone hold this? It does make you more attractive.
Definitely makes you a man with a leech on his arm is, you know, irresistible.
I thought it would be nice if, um, we could all see each other properly.
God, I can see you all for the first time.
You're all rather beautiful, aren't you? Gas.
Joining the party is Regency House physician Dr.
Kevin Ilsley.
Physicians were gentlemen.
They were educated and expensive, but with limited practical ability, they often did their patients more harm than good.
Women would write gloomily about being pregnant again and the dangers that were inherent in it.
So they were really entering a sort of vale of death, really.
Yeah, well, yes, they were, and there was there was that threat, and of course, it was it was no respecter of persons.
I mean in in 1817 we had Princess Charlotte at the age of 21 she had a long and lingering death as a result of childbirth.
The other thing that is so different from today is the number of children that women had an average of six or seven, and of course, the the havoc that that wreaked with their anatomy in scarring and so on, which must have made Oh! intercourse, lovemaking quite Painful and unpleasant as time went on.
One in three women died in childbirth.
I had no idea it was as desperate as that.
That is so terrifying, to imagine that Oh, dear, I can hardly put my head around that.
I'm Mr.
Foxsmith.
Very pleased to meet you.
In 1816 Mary Shelley wrote Frankenstein, the story of a scientist who made a monster out of body parts and brought it to life with electric shocks.
Mercury to work the electric motor.
This is a battery here? Copper, zinc and this with acid on it? That's right.
Right, this is all excellent-looking stuff.
Foxsmith is taking delivery of some early electrical apparatus.
Um oh, come over here and have a look at this.
You might be well impressed, actually, if you want to make electricity.
You might be quite good at this.
You can hold it, hold there, and I can hold this, and I thrust To Regency men and women, these were fashionable toys.
They also experimented with electric shocks to treat ague, blindness and hysteria.
Do we get to electrocute anybody? We've got plenty of footmen that are willing to volunteer for that.
Good, good that's what I like, willing footmen.
Bend over.
"Oh, they're so naughty!" Early scientists also used kites in an attempt to harness electricity from lightning.
Foxsmith is preparing a tribute to these brave men.
He's also hoping to generate a spark among the group.
So, are you going to go for Everett then or what, Miss Hopkins? No.
No? No.
Why is my love life the topic of today's discussion? - Really.
- I'm sorry.
I just I mean, I'm quite happy being single, thanks.
I think Mr.
Everett's great.
He has a heart of gold.
He's just an all-around great guy.
This place is like living in a fairy tale and I could see myself being swept up in it all and it scares me it really, really scares me.
Kite makers Sorry, I was on my way to my bath and a letter's arrived which I thought we'd all like to hear.
It's rather good news.
Um, it's from our friend Mr.
Carrington.
Who is coming back to join us.
He enjoyed his time so much at Kentchurch over the weekend that "I can't wait to get back there and be amongst such illustrious company.
" So isn't that good news? Very good news.
Everyone happy? You know, it'll be nice to have some music back in the house.
And that's the only reason? And a nice, happy, smiling face.
On his earlier weekend visit, musician Mr.
Carrington touched a chord with Miss Hopkins.
When Mr.
Carrington came for the weekend, it was like a breath of fresh air walking into this house.
Something just kind of clicked inside me, and, um and, uh The hostess's companion, Miss Martin, is helping Miss Hopkins make a love token to greet Mr.
Carrington.
This looks wicked great.
Chaperone Mrs.
Hammond is so thrilled at the prospect of having an attractive musician back at the house, she's hired a grand piano.
This is just what we needed.
Perfect.
Music has ever been a conduit for amour.
But a Regency musician only had the social advantages of a senior servant hardly a suitable candidate for Miss Hopkins.
I've just spilt yellow paint everywhere.
Does it hide it? Ah, that's really, really nice.
Nice.
Ladies, gentlemen.
Oh! Well, that's a proper piano.
Oh, that's so good.
Anyway, come on, come and have a drink and then sort of settle in.
Thank you so much.
That's so amazing.
I can't believe it.
"Here's a little something from me to you "to welcome you back to Kentchurch Court.
"It's good to have you back, mate.
Fondest regards, Miss Hopkins.
" Look at this tambourine she's done.
That is so amazing.
"Follow the beat of your heart.
" God, I'm really getting blown away today.
I want to go home.
I want to go home.
Foxsmith's scientific kite-flying initiative has had the desired effect.
He's finally got the women out of the house and away from the chaperones except, of course, Lady Devonport.
Okay, you ready? You ready? Come on, fly! Yeah! Oh, no! I'm really, really pleased that he's back.
He just breathes a ray of sunshine.
The atmosphere is just electric.
It never works Go, go! You're looking very beautiful, Lady Devonport.
This isn't only the search for faster, higher, keener, better, better-looking; this is the search for truth.
Come on, you two! They're getting better with kites.
They're understanding forces better.
By understanding forces better, they're understanding the planets better.
By understanding the planets better, they're understanding their own universe better.
By understanding their own universe better, they're understanding their own world better.
By understanding their own world, they're understanding themselves better.
It's not just about flying a kite here.
Ready, go! Yes! Oh, go! Oh! Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to introduce you to a scientific and proven method of this Regency period.
A certain Mr.
Fowler states that "Is it not the duty of young persons, "before entering a proper marriage state, "to know the characteristics and dispossession of those who are their partners?" Phrenology, an early 19th century attempt to read a person's character by plotting the bumps on their head a must for those looking to find the perfect husband.
Nicely.
Sorry.
Couldn't you try to be nice? What, like that? Yeah.
This is science; it's not meant to be a head massage.
Thanks to Mr.
Foxsmith's unfailing efforts to use science to inspire passion, Miss Hopkins gets to make a move on Mr.
Carrington.
You have clean hair, which is great.
Honestly, you don't have very many lumps on your head.
Did you not have any bumps when you were a child? I'm kind of perfect, you know? And I just sat there; no one came up to touch my head, so after about a couple of minutes I thought, "I'm not going sit here and wait for someone or go and ask somebody if they wanted to feel my head.
" I'd rather just, um, come and breathe some night air and, uh, hopefully that'll that nonsense and, you know we'll do something else for the evening.
Mr.
Everett would be the more sincere, truer, genuine kind of guy, and I think Mr.
Carrington will break my heart.
The countess has invited anatomist Gunther von Hagens The Regency was, after all, the age that invented the autopsy.
"Liebe Comtesse, I am very pleased "that you have taken the time to send me correspondence "from your Kentchurch house party.
the detail and functioning of our bodies.
" "My work with plastinates is as unique as the first steps taken by earlier anatomists.
" "I look forward to meeting you.
Professor Gunther von Hagens.
" Ladies, I've taken the liberty of inviting a special guest who's an anatomist called Professor von Hagens, to Kentchurch.
He's going to come here? The one that strips the muscles and I presume that his demonstration will take place after dinner.
He's so controversial.
Demonstration of what? I would very much like him to do a dissection of some description.
It'll be absolutely fascinating to see what he brings with him.
Professor von Hagens arrives.
The many medical breakthroughs that were made at this time were made by men like him men who looked inside corpses to identify the causes of disease.
He could be a bit of a disturbing dinner guest.
Definitely don't think he should be sitting next to Mrs.
Rogers, actually.
God, this is going to be much more yes, worrying than I'd thought.
Medical advance led to a growing demand for bodies.
But the law restricted supply, opening the way for grave robbers.
When new legislation allowed for paupers to be anatomized, there was a public outcry against all who meddled with the dead.
The fear that people have against dead bodies Something that's rotting and something that's decaying, there is a huge instinctive urge to just keep away from it.
How soon after death has occurred do you start working? Well, in the summertime In the wintertime, even five, six weeks, as long at the body is kept cool, when there is some green coloration, I still can fix it with chemicals.
Professor von Hagens' speciality is plastination the use of chemical resins to preserve bodies in dramatic poses.
And do you have plans to have yourself plastinated? Certainly.
I dissected a good friend of mine.
He died with the age of 48.
He never thought of becoming plastinated until he got carcinoma of the kidney.
And then he said, "Well, I'm too young to go to the cemetery.
So I tried to do it, because I felt obliged.
But I must say, in terms of mourning work to come over his death, to digest his death it was very successful.
he stretches across the barrier of death.
Bodies were expensive, and anatomists had to pay for their research.
They raised money by entertaining wealthy patrons with demonstrations of their work.
I just take the people apart in my mind before I even take the scalpel in my hand.
In this way I'm an artist.
In this way I'm a sculptor.
As you say, you can look at somebody, you can see the different layers, you know.
And we're not used to looking at a person and seeing them in that way.
I know what is inside, you know.
Look, when I take a lady's shoulder I know exactly what is now between my finger and my thumb.
You mentioned you might look at somebody you see a muscle move and you know what's adjacent to that.
Have you had the experience with anybody tonight? Oh, yes.
Did you see here the muscle how it comes up? Please swallow again.
When this comes up, it's very Exciting? I was kind of sat opposite the professor.
He was eating a blackberry fool at the time, and he just kind of looked directly at me.
He looked me straight in the eye, and he raised his eyebrow.
And, um, you know when you kind of see somebody looking at you and you think, "They're looking at me," and they're thinking, "I want you for your body"? Well, he was thinking that, but for all the wrong reasons.
The body is so complex, and there is so much unknown.
The more I learn anatomy, the more anatomical questions are generated.
So, for me the body is more of a secret than for you.
Yes.
The professor has invited the guests to make close inspection of his plastinates.
Von Hagens' inspiration was the French artist Honoré Fragonard.
Fragonard plastinated a complete horse and rider using liquid metals in the 1790s.
I'd like to bring you back into the Regency time of Frankenstein.
With the electricity just invented at this time, just discovered, that there was in the mind of the people it could perhaps bring to life kind of newly put-together body out of parts out of body parts.
In this way, I am more than Frankenstein.
I don't need the kind of electric blunder.
I animate the body not by electricity but by putting them in lifelike pose.
The most significant advance of Regency anatomy was in understanding the female body.
Until then, a woman's body was seen simply as an inferior version of a man's.
I wonder who she was.
Oh, don't start thinking things like that.
because that's the thing he was saying, that Funny enough it looks like a model, do you know what I mean? It doesn't look real.
Do you get that feeling? It doesn't look like a real human being.
Wow.
I feel compelled to look and look and look and look and look.
Apparently the eye is a third real, a third glass, and all the eyelashes are two-thirds real.
every single other thing is completely real.
Lady Devonport takes the lead! Don't push me! The seat needs to be about here.
Well, these were built by dangerous people As the Regency House science event gathers momentum, Mr.
Foxsmith introduces another innovation to the party the velocipede.
It was the custom of men of fashion to show off by strutting about on contraptions like these.
Right, who's going to win this race? I don't know Actually, I think Mr.
Everett.
I pick Carrington to win.
Do you? Well, I think Everett to win.
My money's on Everett on this one.
Do you reckon? both contenders have a history of dislike for each other.
Rivals for the affections of Miss Hopkins, Everett and Carrington are set to battle it out It's a two-horse race anything could happen.
Come on, pedal.
Oh, no, run, I mean.
What are we supposed to do here? Oh, no! Everett, you have to pick that up.
Come on, Everett.
Keep up.
Oh, he's missed the footman.
Nice action with the steering.
Oh! Brilliant.
No, they're going through it anyway.
Excellent race.
Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner.
Mr.
Everett and I wouldn't kind of go anywhere, and one of the reasons why I am so sure about that is because I've had the chance to meet Mr.
Carrington.
Being a 21st-century girl, I'm also frightened of being hurt So all I can do is be myself and try and spend time with him.
Um, maybe, kind of using the purpose of the game, try to get my chaperone to engineer some time so we can genuinely spend time to getting to know each other, because at the end of the day we haven't spent that much time together.
On your marks get ready Hypnotherapist Tom Fortes-Mayer arrives at the Regency House.
Mesmerists, as they were then called, were doctors of the heart and mind.
Many were fashionable quacks; others were motivated by genuine scientific inquiry.
Now you may soon find your mind begins to wander.
My words as a melody may move through your system.
Leaving romance aside, Mr.
Carrington returns to his first love, music.
He's reliving an historic hypnotic experiment.
And I want you imagine that whilst you play, actually you can see the energy, that magnetism, that movement moving from your soul through that instrument.
Mozart wrote the opera Così fan tutte while being hypnotized by the famous Anton Mesmer.
Mr.
Fortes-Mayer will have equal success with him.
and create some power, some change you could make Yes, a piece of music, but the fact that it went to changing some aspect of this world, something that you could be proud in doing, to which your music could stand as a testament to your position.
Mr.
Carrington and I ended up in a clinch last night and I quickly scurried off to bed to prevent any further um, misdemeanors.
seven, eight, open your eyes, nine, ten, wide awake, wide awake.
Whoa.
that Mr.
Carrington blabbed about it to all the boys and Mr.
Everett took great umbrage, which is not surprising at all.
While waiting for his own hypnotically inspired music Carrington plays Così fan tutte to the ladies.
Turn.
I saw him as a threat to what I was trying to achieve here, as far as certainly one lady is concerned.
Anyway, it was clear there was an encounter between Carrington and Hopkins last night.
That's cool.
because I can finally stop thinking about this woman.
And now the ballpark is open again for me.
She's a really, really lovely person, and she's got a heart of gold.
I'm not reciprocating something that she wants.
I can't do it in here and I To any deep extent, it's just not possible.
And you know, um, the more I'm pushed, you know, by someone or something, then probably the quicker I'll recoil.
I would like to be there as a protector and also to note down anything that I see.
I can't wait.
Foxsmith is making preparation for an intimate ghost watch for two.
No stay.
I need a large cruet of wine and two glasses next to the bed.
Because Lady Devonport is so much older, she certainly has a lot more instincts and she can see things and understand people.
She's a perfect person.
And we just connected to each other completely, I think, the first time we met.
And I do love Lady Devonport.
The party gather to celebrate the culmination of their week of science.
they were completely aware that the sun had spots and the spots were going across the face of the sun.
Foxsmith has contrived a human orrery.
It proved to them that the sun in fact wasn't stationary but turning round and round and round and that Earth turns around once a day turn around once a day.
Orreries were mechanical models used to demonstrate the rotating orbits of the planets.
The next planet we get is Can we have Venus over here Venus, the goddess of love? Ladies and gentlemen, look far with science, look more clearly with science.
A round of applause to all of our volunteers who were planets.
There we are.
It was a very nice note saying she was definitely one of the reasons for coming back, because she's just a great laugh but that I just didn't feel comfortable pursuing anything.
There's kind of not really that much chemistry between Mr.
Carrington and I.
I think maybe it was just the kind of excitement and I know that he's certainly not giving me any indication that it's reciprocated on his side.
You know, we've got this really bizarre situation where Everett likes me and I don't like him, and I like Mr.
Carrington and he doesn't like me.
I've always said, you know, I know, when I meet somebody, I know.
But actually, I've been wrong, and it's and it's kind of quite hard to admit that to yourself, that that kind of gut instinct isn't always right, and sometimes I've really missed.
And maybe in my past life, you know, in my past I've missed opportunities that maybe I should have taken advantage of.
It's not all about that chemistry, that spark, because that doesn't last forever.
For Miss Hopkins' chaperone, Lady Devonport, She's preparing for her secret rendezvous with Mr.
Foxsmith.
I've spent the last ten years of my life trying very hard not to get attached to people.
And it has made me think, I actually can open up and be passionate and I think it's not going to kill me; it is all right, and I'm really grateful for that.
And if anybody sees you, you can say you're going midnight riding.
I would say I do love him.
I think he's a really lovely person and I really do mind about him.
Lady Devonport.
Foxy.
So soon.
Glass of wine.
Thank you.
Would you join me? Here's to scientific research.
Absolutely.
Next time, take your battle stations.
Oops, sorry.
It's war.
How dare she despise me? Who does she think she is? Time at the house party is almost up, but many are still lost in the maze of love.
Well, I wish it could be me, but it isn't.
I love every part of her.
Will this storybook tale of dating and mating have a happy ending? He actually proposed to me.
It's the spectacular grand finale, next time at the Regency House Party.
Would you like breakfast for two, sir? This program was made possible by contributions to your PBS station from: When ten single men and women go back 200 years in time to look for romance, what can you expect? Battle stations, everyone Oops, sorry.
How dare she despise me; who does she think she is? Perhaps you could have a duel.
But once the peace returns, will our storybook tale have a happy ending? He actually proposed to me.
Find out on the spectacular grand finale at the Regency House Party.
Would you like breakfast for two, sir? WNET/THIRTEEN NEW YORK This program was made possible by contributions to your PBS station from: Week seven: the gentlemen strut their military prowess to the delight of the eligible women and their chaperones.
Our party is reliving the year 1815.
Britain has been at war with France for 23 years.
A whole generation has grown up against a background of military conflict.
The hostilities have exacted a terrible price.
A higher percentage of the population has died than in the First World War.
Fire.
We're aiming at Napoleon.
He's our number-one public enemy.
He's dead.
I've never shot with these before.
Be quite interesting, I think.
The flintlock musket that Mr.
Carrington is loading was fired at the Battle of Waterloo.
When you're ready.
Just fire the trigger? Yeah.
Ooh! Ooh Phew! Man, I've got the shakes.
That's scary stuff there.
That was a lot of fun.
Bearing in mind they'd fire off three rounds a minute, in the line he'd be all over the place, wouldn't he? Yeah.
With his recoil.
That's probably not very good.
standing still next to me than flopping around the place.
Yeah, that would be sensible.
In 1815, Napoleon met his Waterloo.
But victory in Europe did not bring peace at home.
300,000 servicemen, destitute and hungry, returned to a homeland bankrupt after the long campaign.
Mobs roamed the countryside, stealing from the large estates.
As there was no police force, local militia were used to protect property.
One of these volunteer armies, made up of farmers and local laborers, has come to drill with the gentlemen, ready to confront the growing civil unrest.
Charge bayonets.
Huzzah! Straighten those bayonets.
Militia and volunteers, shoulder arms.
Prepare to advance in ordinary time.
Forward march.
Left, right.
Left, right.
Left, right.
Look to your dressage, gentlemen.
Chaperone Mrs.
Enright, once an army officer herself, casts a critical eye over the troops.
Well, it was the first day on the parade square but I thought Mr.
Foxsmith yawning on parade was something I'd have had him marched to the guard room for.
And as for Mr.
Gorell Barnes, five minutes behind everyone else, ten minutes, 15.
They need to smarten up very considerably.
March.
Left, right.
Left, right.
Left, right.
Left, right.
And halt.
Halt.
Apart from the pace and step, it was perfect.
Oops, sorry.
Right and halt.
Halt.
Master of the house, Mr.
Gorell Barnes, invites his guests to celebrate Napoleon's downfall.
Joining them is historian Andrew Roberts, an expert on the wars.
I'd just like everyone to know this is a dinner in celebration of the fine victory at Waterloo.
And also I'd like to welcome Mr.
Roberts to Kentchurch.
I hope you enjoy dinner and your stay.
So, um enjoy your dinner.
Ma'am, this evening we have soupe la reine, escargot bourgogne Despite the conflict, it remained fashionable to pepper conversation with French words and serve French food.
So what do you make of the spread? After dinner, the table is transformed into the battlefield of Waterloo.
almost as much is psychology as is military strategy.
These action replays of the Duke of Wellington's finest hour were popular.
Andrew Roberts describes the moment when, after ten hours, the tide of battle turned.
imperial guard marched straight through the center Emperor Napoleon was certain that by deploying his crack troops, the Imperial Guard, he would annihilate the allied forces.
However, what he didn't appreciate was Wellington's brilliant ploy which was that on the reverse slopes were, hidden behind them, large forces of British infantry.
Gentlemen.
And they were asked to stand up and suddenly present their many thousands of muskets to pour a withering fire into the front ranks.
I just don't believe we have any concept of it in our time.
I was thinking about World War I And we think that's a long time.
23 years.
It was just the weirdest idea.
which was a massive central thrust through the enemy center.
And it wasn't just the men who went to war.
I didn't realize the actual sort of girlfriends of soldiers would literally follow behind their brigade and go in and save their loved one in a moment of sort of desperation.
I mean, these were just fields of complete kind of bloodshed, and just bodies and limbs and things everywhere.
And how they actually worked out how close they were, I don't really understand, but it must have been terrifying.
The women also went onto the battlefield to rob and murder the enemy wounded.
Andrew Roberts has brought back their gruesome spoil.
And here, a selection of human teeth.
These were actually, all of them, taken from the battlefield at Waterloo.
They were ripped out of the faces of the and then they were taken back to London and sold to dentists.
I found the teeth particularly kind of moving and extraordinary and the horribleness of actually taking them out and making use of them, is really not something that 21st-century people really can probably deal with very well.
Here is a cavalry saber.
You did not use it to point as you charge so much as to try to slash as you went by.
There is something about a perfectly balanced killing tool, which is actually rather thrilling, like it or not.
Nonetheless, he would have understood as he visited those those blighted fields The Battle of Waterloo brought the Napoleonic Wars to an end.
After the years of conflict, soldiers and sailors like Captain Glover, tried to reestablish their life at home.
actually to be found on the battlefield.
For many, finding a wife was a priority.
For Glover, his hopes and desires have fallen on Miss Lisa Braund.
There were quite a few times in the first week or so that I did find it very difficult And vice-versa, when she was finding things difficult, and I've been there for her as well.
So the relationship has come out of just people caring for each other.
There's an old saying, isn't there, that if you love somebody they'll love you back.
This is really, really sweet.
It just made me laugh.
Captain Glover is hoping to entertain the house party, and in particular Miss Braund, by restaging the Battle of Trafalgar.
He has a personal connection with Nelson's famous victory over the French.
As a child, I was told of by a distant relative of ours Captain Blackwood, who was a captain and served with Nelson at the Battle of Trafalgar.
And he was actually captain of the ship Aureleus, while not one of the ships involved in the battle itself, it was the flagship that gave, sort of, the important messages to tell the fleet where to go and where not to go.
So that's sort of family connection, and I got more and more interested in what actually happened and what went on.
A naval officer could make large amounts of money by capturing enemy ships.
It was one of the few ways in which a gentleman could dramatically improve both his financial standing and his rank in Regency society.
"Dear Captain Glover, we are writing to inform you that your prize of £50,000 has now matured.
" "This is a reward for your gallantry in war.
" Some news from London.
I've had a letter from my solicitor informing me that my prize money has come, has matured For capturing a ship during the war.
Marvelous.
And, uh so there's a sum of £50,000 Bloody hell.
sitting for me in London.
Under the Cruises and Convoys Act of 1708, the captain who captures a ship the captain and the crew get two-thirds of the value, so it would be the cargo and also the ship itself would be worth a lot of money.
And it's been suggested that, um seeing as I've been so faithful and such a patron for the Tory Party that I should buy myself a title with it.
A baronetcy.
Excellent.
So I've already instructed my solicitors to proceed.
Have a look at that.
Obviously, the status in the house Just wondering what your thoughts are on that, and how it should be announced to the rest of your guests.
I don't know, I'll have to check it out.
I think I think that, um So that makes it you're the second-most important person in the house now, doesn't it? Does that mean I get wine slightly quicker or I can go horse riding whenever I want or I'm not sure.
Perhaps we could redecorate your bedroom in honor I like it the way it is.
Perhaps you could give me yours.
No chance.
So we'll just keep that under our hats until Wait till you get it and then, uh Yeah.
Glover's fortune of £50,000 would be the equivalent You can buy me a bottle of champagne, dear boy.
Yeah.
Well done.
After the defeat of Napoleon, the arrival of the daily newspaper always a big event in a country house brought home the terrible carnage of the war.
Look, here's the wounded.
"Lieutenant General, the Earl of Uxbridge, severely wounded, Major General Cookson, severely, left arm amputated.
" Fancy being at home and reading that.
You know, being a member of the family or something and just getting that.
Amazing losses, yes.
In the upper section of society there would be in the next generation Also pathetically concerned about the horses.
Oh, terrible.
Terrible carnage.
And the regimental farrier would cut off the right foreleg of every horse, the hoof, which was marked with its army number, so they could tot up what your equine casualties were your regiment was entitled to the remounts.
And some people kept their hooves and you have them for inkwells Yes, inkwells, yes, yes.
You get them in antique shops.
They're very moving, I find.
Very moving.
Very sad.
Master of the House, Mr.
Gorell Barnes, is setting out on his regular patrol of his country estate.
his property would have swallowed up smaller farms leaving most local people totally dependent on him.
He would even tell them how to vote.
he would give his tenants and servants a well-earned holiday.
Morning.
I've got good news.
We're going to have a fair on Saturday, and all the servants are having the day off.
So, um, from 12:00 on Saturday until basically you wake up on Sunday morning.
So there's to be no protocol from them.
They will be as, you know, as we are to each other, if you like.
We'll be naked; we won't be able to get dressed.
You'll have to help each other.
Oh, good plan.
undoing each other's corsets before then.
Apart from Christmas, this was the only official holiday a servant had in the whole year.
And we're all really, really excited, and we don't have to wear our hats, and we don't have to wear our aprons anymore because they're our marks of service.
This is very exciting.
The summer fair was the highlight of the year, and for the men and women of the house party, this is a rare occasion to spend the day together.
With everybody off to the fair, the house is an open invitation to burglars, risky with so many desperate ex-servicemen roaming the land.
These deterrents may not look that effective close up, but from afar they did give some impression there were people in the house.
Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the fair.
lots of fun games, drinking, lots of fine food.
So I just hope you all enjoy yourselves.
Charge your glasses and have fun.
Go! Go on, girls! She's storming ahead.
She wants that dress.
Every fair had a smock race.
Well done.
For the poorer women, this is more than a game.
It would cost a maid three weeks' wages to buy enough material to make this simple dress.
Miss Lisa Braund has personally embroidered it.
Go on, Jack! Go on, Jackson! Let me take your blind, poor thing.
Yes, in your own time.
Another traditional game was climbing a pole covered in duck grease to win a flitch of bacon.
Come on, Zack! Come on, Zack! For the workers, living on vegetables with the occasional broth made from bones, a juicy cut of meat would have been a rare treat.
Come on, Geoff.
Well-done, Geoffrey.
For a few hours, master and servant are equal.
Head down, Carrington.
And here for the first time, maid and mistress are allowed to mix socially.
I mean, you're still sort of smiling at us all.
You sort of you must work so hard.
It's been a really lovely day because it's been a chance to just to speak to the maids sort of as people which is very nice, and they've let their hair down, literally.
But, yeah, you can't ever ignore them because you actually do feel slightly because we're all these big helpless children without them.
They dress us in the morning and send us off and then at night they undress us I have my maids often leaning out the window going, Come inside immediately and put your bonnet on.
" So it's that kind of relationship.
Come on, Carrington! Come on! Carrington, go, go, go! Captain Glover takes advantage of the relaxation of protocol.
That's not very Regency, Miss Braund.
It's not the first time the captain has kissed Miss Lisa Braund.
Uh uh Who who who told you that? Uh, yes, he did try and kiss me.
Stop it.
But, you know, he's a very tactile person, anyway.
So this whole hands-off stuff doesn't seem to work with Captain Glover.
No, he's, um, yes, twice, actually.
At one point Mrs.
Hammond did turn round and went, "Are you kissing Captain Glover?" And I was like, "No, he's trying to kiss me.
" Captain Glover has paid special attention to Miss Braund, a lady of modest means.
With his prize money, of which she is unaware, he would be an excellent catch for her, but Miss Braund's affections have lain elsewhere.
I really used to like Mr.
Everett and I know that he really liked Victoria, and there was a whole kind of triangle thing going on and Victoria was trying to get me and Mr.
Everett together.
I really had a crush on him.
I thought, "My God, this guy is amazing.
" Now I just think, no, he's a really nice bloke.
But there's nothing more.
Although it's really quite funny because, uh, me and Captain Glover had an argument just after the Mr.
Everett thing.
He did actually turn around to me and went, "Why can't you just get over Everett? Why can't you just get over him, and fancy me?" I went, "That would make it so much simpler, Captain Glover.
The life would be much simpler if I could just fancy you.
" We parted, and we weren't speaking very much the next day, and I think he winked across the table at me, and I thought, "Okay, we're back to being friends again.
" I think he's absolutely lovely and we're really, really good friends.
So part of me just thinks, oh, why don't you fancy him? He's so nice to me.
Come on, Geoff.
So is Miss Braund reconsidering her feelings for the tenacious Glover? The day after the fair, as the ladies are eating luncheon, the atmosphere is tense.
For some weeks, there has been growing hostility between the hostess, Mrs.
Rogers, and chaperone Mrs.
Enright.
Mrs.
Enright, with her charge, Miss Conick, form the lowest ranking pair in the house.
She is the least important lady here.
Her charge is the least important one, and she would be bending over backwards not to cause offense to me because she wants to stay here.
Because she just pisses me off.
I mean, for God's sake, you know, she can she certainly lets everybody know how clever she is.
Mrs.
Rogers made a very big thing of the status issue right at the beginning, um, and endeavored, as I saw it and her voice, her tone and body language convinced me that this is what she meant to do to humiliate me We're all doing the best we possibly can.
From the start, Mrs.
Rogers and Mrs.
Enright Weeks ago, they clashed over their respective charges.
You have tried to cast aspersions on her.
I have not done that on your charge.
I have been asked what I thought about her, and I said.
I haven't meant to be rude to you.
I've meant to be clear about my feelings.
It's all in the perception, I believe, mm-hmm.
I have a particular character to deal with whose behavior is irreproachable.
Do stop saying that.
It's getting terribly boring, madam.
Yes, and I'm getting tired of the generalizations which suggest that her behavior is less than satisfactory.
I have forgiven, forborne, and I have reached the end of my capability there now.
For goodness sake, we've got 12 days or ten days left here.
Why can't everybody just really enjoy those last ten days without having something as pathetic as somebody's little vendetta, you know, ruining everything? I have now got the very, very contemporary feeling make no mistake, this has nothing to do with 1811 how dare she despise me? Independently she's a complete nobody and I am somebody, and I am getting very close to telling her that.
The tensions between Mrs.
Rogers and Mrs.
Enright finally explode.
Of course.
Um, Jesus, did you hear that? What's happened? Are you okay? No, I mean, that was awful.
Come and sit down.
What's been broken? A plate.
Mrs.
Enright then said that she'd had enough of Mrs.
Rogers, that she was going to pursue her to an early grave, that she was a foolish old woman, a crashing snob and something else and she threw her plate up the room, and walked out of the room.
And Mrs.
Rogers is very naturally, very shaken.
I have never broken any crockery over an argument before in my entire life.
But if you put a prick in an animal's backside long enough, it'll eventually kick, won't it? A little bit shaken, because I don't think anybody has ever behaved like that to me before.
This has been ongoing.
This has been an onslaught going on and on and on every day.
And it's horrible to watch and it's horrible to witness.
I don't know what I've done wrong.
I've tried to avoid an uproar, tried to avoid losing my own dignity, which matters a good deal to me, but if you don't deal with these things, this is what happens.
At the first attack a bully has to be identified and warned immediately not to do it.
This all along has smacked in some way of bullying and I can't bear it.
And I can't bear unkindness of this level, either.
I have a horrible feeling you might be asked to apologize to her.
I have a horrible feeling I might be asked to apologize to her.
And what will happen? I have a horrible feeling we both might be asked to leave.
Well, I'm sorry if I've done that to you, Hayley.
Well, no, you had to do what you had to do.
It's just something that just occurred to me just afterwards.
It's within the power of the hostess to ask Mrs.
Enright to leave.
She could stop goading me.
And if she does, then her charge, Miss Conick, will have to leave, too.
Mrs.
Rogers is comforted by her charge, the countess.
It feels like being someone's second, doesn't it? Like she's my chaperone.
and it is kind of like you're the backup, It should be, but it's kind of looking the other way around.
I never, ever expected to chaperone my chaperone.
We all chaperone our chaperones.
Mr.
Gorell Barnes has been forced to mediate, even though no Regency man would expect to involve himself in women's affairs.
The fact of the matter is what is concerning me here is there is 14 people in the house here and the biggest problem seems to be coming Mrs.
Hammond and Mrs.
Rogers seem to be one side, and you and Lady Devonport seem to be another side.
Not willingly.
Well, not willingly, but this is how I see it.
What I would like to do is if you two can sort out your differences between you in a I'm not going to be spoken to like that in public, I'm afraid.
Okay, well, fair enough.
I'm not taking sides with anybody here because I just would like you to sort it out, okay? And I think that if you can't both It is not my job.
Can I finish, can I finish? If you can't both be adult about this if you don't get on with each other, avoid each other.
I'm willing to do that, absolutely.
I am willing to avoid Mrs.
Rogers 100%.
But if you are going to avoid Mrs.
Rogers 100%, Mrs.
Enright, then you may as well not be here.
Would you like me to volunteer to leave? Is that what you'd like? That's not what I'm saying.
It's not a question of volunteering.
But it's a question of whether or not we can just try and get on with each other and perhaps work out the differences.
But we can only do that if Mrs.
Rogers and I talk together.
Well, that's what I'd like you to do.
I'm willing to make that attempt.
I'll go for a walk now with Mrs.
Rogers to put our cards on the table and sort it out.
Well, I'd quite like an apology, I'm afraid.
I've never been spoken to like that in my life and I think I deserve an apology.
Do you feel that you were outspoken to Mrs.
Rogers and perhaps slightly too harsh? I feel I need time to consider that and I feel that apologies may be due on both sides.
Okay.
The chaperones were here to do a job, to get their charges married, yeah, that's what they've come here for.
If they're not going to do their job properly then I might as well ask them to leave.
They've given up on what they're here to do.
So, quite frankly, , they're useless.
Perhaps we could have a duel.
That's a good idea, I think.
If Mrs.
Rogers and Mrs.
Enright have a duel, one of them dies sorted.
Mrs.
Rogers takes to her bed.
She's waiting for an apology.
Underneath the trees Captain Glover has planned an afternoon to commemorate the Battle of Trafalgar with a nautical picnic of salt pork washed down with rum and fresh lime.
I'm going to introduce you to a distant relative of mine, Captain Blackwood and there's the gentleman himself.
He looks like you, actually.
You see the curly hair there.
I can really see the resemblance.
Look to your left.
Yes Needs a shave.
My hair isn't quite that gray yet, but I'm working on it.
I have a letter here from Admiral Nelson to Captain Blackwood giving instructions to keep an eye on the fleet.
So, as I pass that round, I'll read out actually That's the genuine letter.
No way.
So I'll pass this round.
That's the real thing.
It goes, "To Captain, the Honorable Henry Blackwood, "HM Ship Aureleus.
"From the Victory, October 9, 1805, AM "Cadiz due east, 19 leagues.
"My dear sir, many thanks for your letter of yesterday.
Let us have them out.
" "In short, watch all points and all winds and weathers, Be assured I am ever and always yours, Nelson and Bronte.
" Wow! At the house, Mrs.
Rogers finally receives an apology from Mrs.
Enright.
We have had an éclaircissement, and all kissed and made up and become friends.
Far better understanding of each other.
And everything's better? Yes.
Yeah, absolutely.
I'm really pleased.
Yeah, so am I.
It's time for the Battle of Trafalgar to commence.
Fought off the coast of Spain in 1805, it was Britain's most decisive sea victory.
Can we have the British team on this side? British, British British.
And the French give us all a laugh.
The battle is drawn.
Say you're there, you can do that and then you get a shot.
Okay, now we're going for the kill.
The French have a shot.
Higher.
further, further back.
Down, a little down What, there? Down, like that.
Left higher, right arm down.
"Left higher, right arm down.
" Excellent.
Wicked.
Good work! Vive la France! The English have lost two ships.
They've lost two ships.
So, um, it looks like we're going to win, which is a problem, as we didn't Damn Frenchies.
"Damn Frenchies," sir? It may look like the French are winning, but on the day, Admiral Lord Nelson had a brilliant plan.
Going for the big one.
Traditionally, ships would draw alongside.
But in an unprecedented move, Nelson's fleet attacked the enemy at right angles.
The French and Spanish forces were unable to regroup.
Despite being heavily outnumbered, the English shattered the enemy's fleet of 33 men of war.
Oh, wow, guys, guys Make it spectacular.
The victory cost Nelson his life.
But it secured Britain's supremacy at sea for the next hundred years.
Rule, Britannia, Britannia rules the waves Britain never, never, never shall be slave.
After the battle, Miss Hopkins breaks Regency protocol to speak alone with Mr.
Everett.
At one time they were close.
It would have been a good match her new wealth and his old family connections but when musician Mr.
Carrington came along, everything changed.
He had neither status nor fortune, but Miss Hopkins was smitten.
This caused a serious rift between her and Mr.
Everett and they haven't spoken till now.
I had a wonderful chat with Miss Hopkins, The two of us sort of had these storm clouds above our heads, and it was as if it rained and suddenly the sun had come out and there was this sort of a nice feeling.
I mean, we found our friendship again and we just talked really pleasant to each other.
We had a nice we just giggled and laughed, and the cloud that has been sort of hanging over me the whole sort of thing just sort of lifted, you know.
We had a fantastic conversation on the lawn and, uh I don't know how much he told, but he, um he actually proposed to me uh, with a um And I declined him.
And I'm sure he won't have told you that, but I do think it's important that you know that.
I just couldn't I couldn't do it.
I do like Mr.
Carrington an awful lot, but I know the feeling is not reciprocated.
Is it my fault that I've gone for the wrong man, that I've kind of turned the really, really nice guys down in favor of having somebody who's maybe wrong for me? So it has been kind of quite a confusing time because I've not maybe allowed myself to explore any relationship with Mr.
Everett.
And if I have hurt him, I am so sorry.
And maybe I have been wrong.
You know, maybe this is the lesson that I needed to learn in my life: Don't always listen to your heart, sometimes listen to your head.
Time has arrived to announce Captain Glover's entry into the aristocracy.
A highly respected peer of the realm is invited to witness the event.
make two announcements: Firstly, welcome Lord Temple Morris here.
It's a great honor for you to come.
Thank you very much for coming.
And some rather good news is Captain Glover has, for his fantastic performances at sea and his capture of an enemy boat, has been awarded a large amount of money and a baronet.
So Captain Glover is departing and Sir Jeremy is arriving.
Lord Temple Morris explains the finer points of Captain Glover's new rank.
a very nice honor to have actually because you're free to go in the House of Commons.
You don't have to go to the Lords, but you are a titled commoner, you know.
Sir Jeremy, perhaps you'd like to read your letter out? Yes, it's quite interesting, it's £50,000 has now matured.
I haven't spent all of it.
I put money towards a lighthouse fund.
I put some money into researching electricity.
I've put some money into sailors' widows and kept a considerable sum for myself should you be interested in marrying now someone with not only title but a massive fortune.
My position in the house is now most senior gentleman.
I shall be sitting at the top of the table from now on.
No, I won't, I won't, no, sir.
How would your wife be known as? "Lady," of course.
So I might get married in the next few days which might elevate one of the ladies.
This is music to the ears of Braund's chaperone, Mrs.
Hammond.
Once Miss Braund did favor Mr.
Everett, um, in her heart She has grown increasingly fond of Captain Glover over the weeks that we've been here and we think that it's only right and natural, Miss Braund and I, that because he has proved himself, even when he was a poor man, that he, um I can't say "have the hots for Miss Braund," can I? That he favored Miss Braund and she should now reciprocate by agreeing.
Now that his ship has come in, Sir Jeremy could have his pick of the women round the table.
But he remains steadfast.
And for the penniless Miss Braund, this is, indeed, good news.
I find him more and more endearing just because he's being himself and he's just being so sweet, yeah, I think if you persevere you can get what you want.
I think there is something to maybe marrying your best friend, someone you can completely rely on, who will be there for you no matter what, who's not going to disappear at the first sign of trouble, who is going to be genuinely concerned about you.
So, um and I think Captain Glover has all of those qualities.
Ask you all to raise your glasses and toast Sir Jeremy.
Sir Jeremy.
Thank you.
Alias Captain Glover.
Indeed, mate.
It's the last week of the Regency house party.
Two months ago, our modern-day guests arrived hoping to find love, Regency style.
This is their last chance to form an attachment.
In Regency terms, the glamorous but hard-up Mr.
Carrington needs a wealthy wife to secure his place in society.
Sneaking into the lady's quarters, he's risking expulsion to make his move.
Thought I'd do a warm gesture for a very special girl.
I think this might be something that would really make her day.
It's kind of cool, isn't it? Bit of a path.
I've said, "You are "a truly special person.
" The lady in Mr.
Carrington's sights is industrial heiress Miss Hopkins.
Her money would have made her a prize catch for any Regency gentlemen.
As far as my feelings towards Miss Hopkins goes, I don't think they've changed at all.
I'm still very attracted to her, I still feel the same way as I did the first day I first met her.
I think she's an amazing woman.
His parting gift to the house, Mr.
Everett is designing a maze of love.
It's arranged in the shape of a fan, that essential prop of Regency courtship.
It's a nice sort of metaphor for being in here with the complications of not only being here but the whole marriage game and stuff trying to find your right route through life.
The maze will be more than just an amusement.
First one in another 500 or so to go.
In a very public acknowledgment of intimacy, it would be navigated in couples.
Final partnerships will be declared, and Mr.
Everett is hoping to escort Miss Hopkins.
I think the whole idea is that the couples as as the young ladies and the young gents Of course, the chaperones no doubt will be watching, but you can go into the center and be away from their eyes.
So what goes on in there is anybody's guess, I think.
The only cloud on the horizon is Mr.
Carrington.
Oh, as far as my friendship, let's call it, we just became friends very, very quickly and, of course, that sort of quickly developed into something a bit more serious.
But, of course, the arrival of Carrington didn't exactly help the situation, put slightly the cat amongst the pigeons I don't know exactly what their relationship is now, I don't want to pry into that.
I don't think anything's going on.
Sleep But a successful serenade early on has given Mr.
Carrington a distinct advantage And may your dreams would be the more sincere, truer, genuine kind of guy.
And I think Mr.
Carrington would break my heart.
But aren't girls always attracted to the wrong men? Happens every time.
Mr.
Carrington is confident his charm will outweigh his meager prospects.
We've had a great friendship, and they can see that, and we're close.
is that Hopkins is wealthy here, and I'm not, and whether she wants to part with her her income is a choice that her and her chaperone will have to make.
if they chose someone else for me, I think probably it will be because they thought that Miss Hopkins should be with a person of higher status.
I think that would be the only reason that would sway it.
Now tell me, Victoria, it's been a busy, busy few weeks for you, has it not? With time running out for Miss Hopkins, her chaperone, Lady Devonport, presses her to choose between her two suitors.
And I've thought long and hard about it, and I've come to a decision.
Go on then.
And that is Mr.
Everett.
I knew you were going to say that.
Why? Because you are so contrary.
Right, well, it's your life, and I like the man.
He's grand.
Because they are both great gentlemen, and there's nobody truer, more sincere, genuine, caring, sensitive than Mr.
Everett in the house.
Well, I think that's entirely true.
And I know I'm very lucky to, you know, have him want me, really.
He's been consistent in his feelings for you from the very beginning.
And gorgeous though Mr.
Carrington is, but if you change your mind again I'll let you know.
I can't be doing all this travel agent stuff.
He'll be a very happy boy, Mr.
Everett will.
And anyway, he knows the way round the maze.
Away from the romantic merry-go-round, the estate's hermit has more basic concerns.
Everything's wet, and there's a conspiracy afoot to completely starve me.
And I must have lost about two stone.
Really hungry all the time.
And they're like, "He's a hermit," like he doesn't need food, he can just eat grass or something.
I'm not a deer; I do need food.
But the hermit has found love.
Miss Francesca, the lowest- ranking lady in the house, is fast losing her tenuous grip on gentility.
It is very romantic, you know, being a sort of filthy vagabond hermit, being visited by this exotic creature in petticoats about dinner parties, target practice, angry chaperones.
Yeah, it's like being in a wonderful story.
It has had its romantic moments.
It has had its romantic moments.
I mean, inevitably, if you're sort of thrown together in a in a sort of cold, wet, windy day, if you have to sort of huddle together to stay warm, from a practical point of view, yeah, it's been Thanks, Hermit.
Bit of romance, yeah.
There would be no going back for a Regency lady's companion who chose love over security.
As a hermit's wife, she could expect a life of harsh practicality.
What's all the juice in there? Did I say juice it as well as zest it? It's like the first time she came up here and she was she repaired my sugar bag, which had a simple burn in it, and she was there sewing away for about three hours, and she finished it eventually.
With a huge grin, she passes, says, "I've finished," And I was like, "Ah, that's very good.
" Tried to open it, and she'd sewn it right through both sides of the bag.
Didn't even check before she handed it over So she had to cut it all out and start again.
But now you're good at sewing, aren't you? Bit of a learning curve up here.
As the guests set out for a final picnic, the issue of marriage is never far from mind.
One step above Miss Francesca in status, Miss Conick's future security would also depend on finding a good husband.
I've seen all kinds of practice.
For her, that's a problem.
I just don't think I could bear to be a married woman to a man who was legally allowed to beat me and rape and whom I couldn't divorce um and then obliged to have children when one in three women died in childbirth.
Score.
Being a mistress might have been all right.
You had more control of your money; you had more control over what you did, who you spent your time with.
A career as a mistress was a high-risk business.
Success could bring independence and wealth.
But disease and destitution lay in wait for those who failed.
A letter for you, ma'am.
"Dear Mrs.
Enright, with regard to my daughter Hayley, "I'm writing to ask whether or not "a suitable match has now been found for her.
I shall write back to Mrs.
Conick that Hayley rather shockingly proposed to me that she might go to London and become a courtesan to fund her ambition to have a literary or political salon perhaps a combination of both.
quite how I was going to explain this to her parents, because I thought Hayley's particularly well-equipped both physically and intellectually for these tasks.
Not everyone has turned their back on the prospect of marriage.
Miss Braund has made a classic Regency compromise.
She may not have fallen head over heels in love, but she is able to see the benefits of a life spent with her wealthy best friend, Sir Jeremy Glover.
I really like the guy.
I really, really like him.
He's a massive flirt.
He's a huge, huge flirt as am I, so we just kind of hit it off on that level.
And if I had the choice of all the gentlemen in the house, the gentleman I would choose would be, yes, Sir Jeremy.
Sir Jeremy, in Regency times, would be looking for a wife that could bear him children.
You would have been good friends and there to support each other, and that's what this is.
I think I tried to explain to Lisa that, you know, a knight in shining armor does need a damsel in distress.
Otherwise, he's just running around in his armor looking like a like an idiot.
The question facing Miss Hopkins is not how to love, but who.
Oh, no.
Oh Mr.
Carrington.
Do you think? And to think somebody's gone to all this effort and has, you know, picked up on, you know, something that you've said in passing to make you happy is just completely overwhelming.
With his bold move, Mr.
Carrington draws ahead of Mr.
Everett in the race for Miss Hopkins' heart.
How the hell did you know that? To be honest, I kind of probed.
Oh, really? It is a complete and utter fantasy my bed strewn with rose petals.
For the last eight weeks, the guests in the Regency House have been waited on hand and foot by their dedicated servants.
Now the master wants to reward them.
As far as the footmen are concerned, there's two key rules to remember.
One is that you have to be as elegant as possible The second thing is that a footman, if at all possible, should be seen and not heard in the dining room.
Mr.
Gorell Barnes has decided to revive the tradition of turning the social order on its head a custom dating back to Roman times.
Trading places with their servants, the gentlemen will serve dinner to the footmen and maids.
The footmen have made it a lot less lonely for me.
I have a very good relationship with them.
They respect me, and they've been incredibly supportive.
Right, serving.
Mr.
Foxsmith, would you like to, uh Right, and I've worked this one out.
Could you attract my attention please? Red wine, please.
Certainly.
Red wine.
Sir, you haven't actually taken his glass yet, sir.
Oh, Christ.
And as I was saying, blah, blah, blah.
Sir, you have just shaken the water all over the table there, sir.
There's a certain elegance required to shake water back into the cooler.
Yes, yeah, I'm getting there.
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Oh, thank you.
Mrs.
Rogers takes the countess aside.
As her chaperone and the master's guardian, she would be handsomely rewarded if she could bring them together.
What I was hoping to organize was to get Mr.
Gorell Barnes to take you round the maze.
to go through the maze with Mr.
Gorell Barnes.
Fine.
Well, that's what I imagined.
And it works out quite nicely, because you kind of fall into like if there are guests or something like that.
I think one of the guests once said to me, "Well, you and your husband" And I went "No, no, no, he's not my husband.
" two, three, one, two, three, one, two, three, one, two, three, one, two The end of the house party marks the climax of the guests' romantic hopes for the season.
one, two, three, join hands and one Miss Hopkins is playing a dangerous game.
Having opted for Mr.
Everett, she's switched her allegiance overnight to Mr.
Carrington, to the dismay of her chaperone.
But Lady Devonport has a problem of her own.
And walk.
Over the summer, she's conducted a dangerous liaison with Mr.
Foxsmith.
You are very, very, very handsome.
Fashionable Regency society turned a blind eye to relationships between young men and older, married women so long as they were discreet.
Ah, Lady Devonport.
Marriage, however, was out of the question.
Now that Lady Devonport and Mr.
Foxsmith are about to leave the Regency, they must face the future.
Just who will go through the maze in couples has yet to be agreed.
Mr.
Everett has asked the chaperones to settle the competing claims of head and heart and help resolve the final partnerships.
They will interview each of the men.
Right, let's give them hell, girls.
Absolutely.
First up, the most eligible man in the house, Is there a lady in the house who you like more than the others? Yes.
Uh one of the maids.
Well, right, which maid is it, sir? Forgive us, but we have collected the impression that you and the countess were on warmly affectionate terms.
Perhaps.
Perhaps.
"Perhaps.
" You're sitting on the fence.
What does "perhaps" mean? Whatever you'd like it to mean.
Now, what do I do with this? I'm going through this one Time for Mr.
Carrington to unleash his charm offensive.
Why, hello, ladies.
Good morning, sir.
Mr.
Carrington, is there anybody here that you are particularly fond of or have a preference for? Yeah, there is very much somebody I'm specifically very close to and feel an enormous attachment to and that's Miss Hopkins.
As Miss Hopkins' chaperone, it's Lady Devonport's job to keep impoverished playboys at arm's length.
But having experienced the pitfalls of Regency propriety herself, she's in two minds.
And as you know, I support your interest in her completely.
So next! No.
How do you propose to support Miss Hopkins? Um, with my massive amounts of charm and talent and no money.
And so modest.
As the chaperones debate the charms of Mr.
Carrington, Mr.
Everett soldiers on with his maze, helped by old friend Miss Braund.
And then this one here So what's this rounded one here? When Mr.
Everett comes in, I know that he's going to Yeah, I agree.
In fact, either of them are perfectly wonderful.
Morning.
Morning.
Morning, morning.
Do sit down.
Thank you so much.
The first question is, is there a particular lady here that you like? I like Miss Hopkins.
And I like them all.
But you feel the warmest affection for Miss Hopkins? Yeah.
Well, I think you need to tell us Um, it's mattered a great deal, and so when we had our when we sort of had a bit of a frosty period, it was quite sort of it was quite, you know it was quite painful, really.
Um, but we've managed to sort of find our friendship again Would you be able to keep your friendship with her if she was with someone else, do you think? I would think so, yeah.
There's no reason why not.
Yeah, absolutely.
I'm not going to hold grudges or anything.
She's a cracking lass, you know, and if she's if she wants someone else, then, you know, then I'd go, "hey ho," and just, um, carry on being friends.
And the other day at dinner she was sort of sitting there, she kind of gave me a gave me a wink across the table and it was like, oh, that sort of giddy schoolkid again.
Sad.
Oh, have it washed and sent round to my tent.
He's absolutely sweet, isn't he? I just feel really sorry for him.
He's such a lovely bloke, and he can't have Miss Hopkins, can he? Mr.
Foxsmith.
Do come and join us.
Sit in the electric chair.
What we're trying to find out here, from everybody, not just you, is if there's somebody here that you really would like us if we possibly can, to sort of push in your direction? Well, yes yourself.
Oh, that's so sweet, but what can we do? It's not practical.
Then it seems that, uh um, the conversation is really over.
As I would like to get out of here with my integrity, there's very little else to say.
Are there any of the girls that you think would make your life bearable? I wouldn't consider that because I wouldn't do a second best.
All of the ladies here are very attractive in their own right.
There's nothing wrong with any of them.
Well, we can't do anything about it.
And I don't think that would help you, but we can Then, uh jump over the Then I'll continue my search for somebody who I can get married to and have children.
In the meantime, I'll continue my bachelor monk-like existence.
Thank you very much.
Thank you very much.
I don't know what to say.
Don't say anything.
Just keep it safe.
And you will use it.
Ladies, thank you very much.
Thank you, Mr.
Foxsmith.
All right? Next.
It's her grandmother's wedding ring for a great number of years while she was happily married, so there's a huge amount of sentiment in this ring.
I think it must be the most precious thing I own.
Oh, there she goes.
All right, Lady D.
? We're very, very passionate friends and there has been a sexual tension between us.
Practically, we can't go to the next step and so what we've done is we've sort of sacrificed all of that for each other's long-term happiness.
Um, it would otherwise be a May-to-September, doomed-to-failure relationship.
Final preparations for the servants' dinner are underway.
The gentlemen are catching on fast.
Sir, if you do get to serve the soup you have to be quite careful about how much to offer the guests because it can run out.
So if it looks like everybody wants some of the soup, then it's usually just a ladle and a bit.
Like a swan, Everett.
Like a swan? Upstairs, the ladies are dressing their maids for dinner.
When serving drinks, is it to the right or the left shoulder? Drinks are to the left, food is to the right.
No, failed; drinks are to the right.
But I wanted to give you a tiara.
Don't know if that's quite allowed.
Who's going to have giggles first? Everett.
You're all very symmetrical at the moment.
Tonight's soup is asparagus soup.
Zachary.
Seem to have miscalculated somewhat.
Is there any more soup? Ah.
I'm afraid cook didn't make enough soup.
Tonight was quite strange, almost seeing them as, like, normal people.
We've always looked up at them and I found it almost quite unbearable and uncomfortable to be served by them and I mean constantly I felt myself, like, wanting to help them.
I'm terribly sorry, Mrs.
Mason.
Yes.
Oh, dear.
Perhaps a glass of wine, Mrs.
Mason? Red or white? It was delicious soup.
So, a footman's role is to look impressive and elegant whenever he's on or off duty, sir, and I think you should stand up as straight as possible, sir.
Much better.
spending nine weeks keeping your mouth shut pretty much and just sort of, um, agreeing with what most people say, even though half the time they're talking rubbish For one footman, it's payback time.
After eight weeks emptying chamber pots, it's his turn to enjoy a Regency dining facility something never attempted in mixed company by the gentlemen.
Perhaps this might help, sir.
do it with a certain style and it looks fine.
would you mind removing the chamber pot, please, sir? More wine, anyone? It's the morning after the servants' party.
Can you let Mrs.
Rogers that I shan't be down after dinner? Mr.
Everett is putting the finishing touches to his maze.
To be honest with you, I know the route through it, so whoever I get chosen to go through it with since I since I know my way through.
He's ever hopeful that his creation will impress Miss Hopkins and finally bring them together.
There's a couple of girls would be quite nice.
Miss Hopkins, for example, would be quite nice.
But after Mr.
Carrington's rose petal gesture, Miss Hopkins can think of no one else.
nobody's ever, ever done anything like that for me.
He was so completely up for it.
Ladies and gentlemen, I think a round of applause for Mr.
Everett and his construction here.
Well done, well done.
Welcome to my maze.
There are three places where you've got to get to, and they represent, that one to the left, wealth; that one over there, children; In order to finish the maze, you must have three flowers, one of each color.
Enjoy yourselves.
It's the moment Mr.
Everett has been waiting for.
The hostess announces which guests will enter the maze as couples.
So we'll start with our host, Mr.
Gorell Barnes and the countess.
Pleasure.
Then next, Sir Jeremy with Miss Braund.
Then we have oh, yes, Mr.
Carrington with Miss Hopkins.
What a lovely position for a lady to be in and, well, it's not a lovely position, you know, to have kind of two admirers, that I have to choose between the two.
And I am really, really bothered about how Mr.
Everett will feel about it.
Do you just go, and you go No, no, no, I'm going to place people.
It's my right.
Miss Hopkins.
Would you like to start through this entrance here? This way first.
Thank you.
All right, so This couple could start here.
Everyone, this way, please.
Oh, yes, go across to the left.
How did you manage that? "Alas, though my heart is warm and true, no wealth can I command.
" Oh, dear.
It's quite appropriate.
Ah, Miss Hopkins.
What a pleasant surprise.
Have you lost your partner? I give you a baby son, an heir to my fortune.
I actually wanted a daughter.
Sup up and let's go.
Sup up.
Ah, it's a really sickly child.
Oh, no, that's quite sad.
Let's have it adopted.
That's a good idea; we'll sell it to the butcher.
The single guests are left to ponder their fate.
Oh, look at the bachelor.
Women had at most five summers to find a husband or face the dismal prospect of spinsterhood.
But one of them, heiress Miss Samuel, remains undaunted.
I swear, coming into the Regency House, I mean, I was thinking, "Look, at least there've got to be some half-decent-looking guys.
Eye candy that's all I ask for.
Got some serious flowers happening on every level here.
"And next, no rival must I view.
I scorn divided love.
" It was just horrible.
It was absolutely awful.
You know, I had Mr.
Everett, he kept looking at me and shaking his head, and Mr.
Carrington who kept arguing with me.
Yeah, but the way to do it I know, is that And all I could do was think, "Oh, my God, have I made the right decision?" And it was just absolutely awful, and when Mr.
Everett walked off.
I was a bit surprised that, um, that I wasn't chosen to go through the maze, 'cause again, I was hoping it would be nice if I could have gone with Miss Hopkins.
Got a bit kind of weepy and a bit, uh, you know, just all sort of came crashing in.
and had to sort of go off into the woods and breathe a bit.
It'll be you tomorrow.
The matchmaking is over, the chaperones' job is done.
Well, it's been a triumph for good temper, hasn't it? It has, it has, absolutely.
And for organization.
And no more sharing a washbowl.
And no more sharing a washbowl Let alone a pot, because I mean, really.
It's quite funny that we actually managed that with such kind of dignity.
I'm going to go away from here with the most amazing memories.
I think we all think that.
And it's been nice.
There's a kind of bond between us all to have, you know? Yeah, definitely.
Support, Mrs.
Rogers.
And you're very warm, even when you're being grumpy.
Ultimately, you've always done it with the best intentions.
I think that says a lot for you as an individual, and that's something I'm going to take back about you, Mrs.
Rogers.
No, really, you should be proud of yourself because we have come out of this with the best match for me.
Mmm.
It might not have been the one I wanted in the beginning, but it's definitely the one I want now.
It's the best match for you.
And the only girl to get a man with a title.
Thank you, Mrs.
Mason, for putting up with my antics.
You've been incredibly patient and nice.
The party's been a triumph.
No scandal and several matches.
Look after her on the way out.
But the hostess is planning a final coup.
Her first move is to persuade the other chaperones to leave early.
Safe journey.
Thank you very much.
Good-bye.
Time to say good-bye.
Thank you very much for getting me through this.
Thank you for the help.
Everything I've said to you is true.
I'll get my parents to fix you up with somebody.
That'll be grand, thank you.
Come on.
When I said good-bye to Lady Devonport, it was very difficult not to walk up the path.
It was like losing a limb.
She's been my counsel, she's been my best friend, she's been everything to me.
I love Lady Devonport.
Left behind to act as moral guardian to the young ladies, Mrs.
Rogers is hoping to guide her charge into the arms of Mr.
Gorell Barnes.
I think one of my main reasons for coming was the kind of idea of stepping into a storybook, and here it is like a storybook every day.
You know, the shutters open on this storybook scene, looking romantic and gorgeous the whole time.
Mr.
Gorell Barnes is a very attractive man and he looks fantastic in his Mr.
Darcy outfit, I have to say, just walking around, very decorative and elegant.
I always think there will be the perfect person and she's a very smart girl and she's intelligent, and she's been very distant from everything here, and I've been quite distant from people and I think we just get on with each other.
We've got to know each other very well through sitting next to each other at dinner And we're still quite playful and we do flirt with each other.
Certain things you think about when you're younger become less important than finding somebody that you actually want to spend the rest of your life with, someone that you get on like a best friend as well as a lover.
And tonight, the hostess has arranged one final bid for romance a masked ball.
Masked balls allowed for a relaxation of the rules.
Unmarried men and women grabbed at the opportunity to indulge in licentious behavior.
If we get the chance to be naughty tonight, What sort of naughtiness do you mean? I don't know.
It could lead anywhere.
As long as the hostess remains in the house, propriety is observed.
But in the interest of her charge, she's keeping a discreet distance.
It's a beautiful setting that we've got tonight, and I think it is that farewell to this strange little Regency magical world.
And I think everyone will think whatever happens tonight doesn't really, you know, matter in a way, or we'll you know, is part of this strange world So I think probably some mischievousness will occur.
Once this is finished, perhaps people might misbehave themselves, yeah.
They all let their hair down and have fun.
In the highly charged atmosphere, emotions run high.
I love Lady Devonport.
I love her so much.
I love every second of her body.
I love every part of her.
And Miss Hopkins' romantic dilemma returns to haunt to her.
I'm just a sort of plain and average girl, and Mr.
Everett has asked me to leave with him and so has Mr.
Carrington.
And I've had to make a choice tonight between the two.
And it's broke my heart.
It's the morning after the masked ball.
Today, the guests all leave the Regency house.
The hostess has had a quiet night unlike some.
Corridor creeping was perhaps inevitable at some house parties, but there was one absolute rule: Because the countess and Mr.
Gorell Barnes are both so very discreet, you have to watch very carefully.
Mr.
Gorell Barnes made a wonderful remark when he first came in here, something on the lines of "It would be very easy to fall in love with somebody's mind here.
" I did actually ask him last night whether that had happened, and I think there are indications that there could possibly be romance.
Ah Fantastic.
Thank you very much.
Breakfast, Mr.
Gorell Barnes? Would you like breakfast for two, sir? Hmm.
I'm going back to my room.
Countess.
Mr.
Gorell Barnes.
Very pleasant surprise being woken up by a beautiful woman.
Sir.
Better than you, Darren.
I'll just get you some clean clothes, sir.
Safe in the knowledge that society would now have forced the countess and the master down the aisle, the hostess faces a comfortable retirement.
Hip-hip Hooray! Hip-hip Hooray! Hip-hip the young guests spend the last few hours in the house Go! This week has been really hard for me because I've had to kind of lots of choices to make between two really fantastic people, and I wanted to leave with somebody who I knew could carry me through it and who had made the whole experience so special.
Mr.
Everett was my choice.
So, it was very difficult.
And here we are, leaving together.
Thank you.
No, thank you.
I'm going to miss your little smiling face at breakfast.
To his surprise, Mr.
Carrington leaves empty-handed.
Ah, the hills.
gone to the river.
Right on the tippity-top of that hill.
Is that where we're going to live? That's where we're going to open a gift shop.
Do you see a lot of customers up there? Rock climbers, picnickers, general touristicos.
Very nice views from up there Very strange as you walk around now and, I don't know it's just so weird because it's been so full, and crying and shouting and screaming and now everyone's gone and it just feels But it feels very nice and quiet and calm.
Everyone's gone.
You can hear the clock ticking, you can hear footmen walking on the gravel, you can hear the birds and the wind, and you could never hear that before.
Good bed.
There's been times where it's been really difficult dealing with the most ridiculous situations ever, like a footman coming to me and saying that a lady had come down without her corset, what do I think about that? And dealing with rows, which all seem so petty, probably, on the outside, but in this pressure cooker these are such big issues.
But, yeah, and I think I've, uh yeah, I've pulled it off.
Bless you, sir.
Good-bye, Rob.
Keeping Foxsmith's jacket on occasionally.
Occasionally, sir.
Tom cheers.
Well done for looking after Mr.
Everett so well.
Darren, my faithful valet.
Well done, mate.
Thank you, everyone.
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