Samurai Champloo (2004) s01e09 Episode Script

Beatbox Bandits

Mr.
Yamane.
So, this is where you've been? Wow, it's hard to believe that Yamane the Ogre is gonna be retiring today.
We'll miss you around here.
Starting tomorrow, I'll be just another old man.
I'll live out my years, waiting for death.
Still, it's pretty amazing I mean, you never let a single person get away with sneaking through the checkpoint in the 30 years that you've been here, right? How long are you going to keep slacking off? Get back to your post, or I'll-- Oops, there's that scary look See you later.
I've worked here at the Hakone checkpoint for thirty years, man and boy.
But even here, at this checkpoint that was said to be impregnable, there was one day that was an exception.
Even now, I remember as if it were yesterday That one day that isn 't recorded here in the checkpoint log book On that day alone, everyone was able to pass freely through here, even thieves and criminals.
Everyone embraced whoever was next to him, shouted at the top of their lungs, beat the drums, and danced, letting themselves go.
Yes, it's been thirty years now A travel permit? What's that? You really don't know? I'm amazed that you managed to get into Edo without knowing that.
If you don't have a travel permit, they won't let you through the checkpoint.
Don't you have one, Jin? I did, of course.
--But --But? I lost it.
You bozos Don't sweat it.
If they stop us at the checkpoint, we kill 'em, that's all.
Breaking through a checkpoint is punishable by death on the spot.
And Hakone's in particular is known for being extremely difficult to get through.
Especially for women who are leaving Edo.
What're we gonna do? Hey, there, buddies.
If it's travel permits you need, I have 'em.
I have 'em, and they can be yours for a song! Permits? You mean for the checkpoint? --You bet.
--Really? And if you act now, I'll even throw in these good luck charms for traffic safety.
It's a steal! " Hakone Checkpoint" Arrest them! What? What's going on? What's the problem?! We got permits, don't we?! These things are blatant forgeries.
Did you seriously think you could pass through the Hakone checkpoint with these things? That damn scalper is gonna pay Take 'em away! That was the first time that I saw them.
That was back when I was still a footman.
I had just started as a government official.
Yes, those were the flashing eyes of a stray dog " Beatbox Bandits (Evil Mountain Spirits) " Come on, take off everything, even your kimono.
It's bad enough that you caught us, so why do I have to do this, too? Because you might be hiding some kind of contraband.
That doesn't mean you can-- If you want, we could also do a cavity search instead of just having you strip down.
Take a good look! You'll be joining those guys soon enough! This is Kinugusa, the top official here at the checkpoint.
He's a stereotypical government lapdog.
A man who's rotten to the core.
But because his father has a lot of clout in Edo, no one complains about him.
Watch it, that's cold With an attitude like that, I won't be able to be nice and pretend I didn't see you.
What? Are you serious? How could that have happened? So which one has the bounty on his head? Which one? Who is it? This happens every once in a while.
When we catch someone trying to sneak through who has a criminal record, if it was a violent crime, we have to escort him to the place that issued the warrant instead of executing him at the checkpoint.
That's why we 're supposed to do a thorough check before they're publicly crucified.
But this man enjoyed killing people too much to bother to do that.
Bingo! Damn, we already killed him What am I gonna do? This is seriously bad news I gotta think of a way to smooth this over by the end of the day --Excuse me, sir --What is it? I'm in a bad mood right now, so ask me later.
I have an idea.
Oh, okay That would work.
Bring me those two men and the girl who was with them! As I understand it, someone gave you those forgeries, and you unwittingly tried to pass through here with them.
Public crucifixion would be too harsh a sentence for that.
That being the case, I'm willing to spare you.
But only on one condition.
I want you to deliver this head before the day is out.
Understand? These two are hostages.
If you complete your task and return by sunset, I'll let the three of you through the checkpoint.
But if you don't, these two are as good as dead.
You understand that, right? Make absolutely sure you come back in time, okay? No problem, it's a piece of cake! Just leave it to me.
Before the sun goes down, okay? So, what's this I hear about Tengu roaming these mountains? They are said to be a grotesque people that are terrifying to look upon.
They attack with the speed of the wind, and not a single man has seen them and lived to tell the tale.
No one dares to go near that mountain these days, not postmen, and not footmen.
--See ya! --We can trust you on this, right? Hey, what are you waiting for? Go keep an eye on him to make sure he doesn't run away! You don't think he'd abandon us and run away, do you? Hmm One's on my tail, huh? Who are you? Who, me? I'm out jogging for my health.
Is there a problem? Son of a Don't confuse me like that, damn it! Being assigned to watch over him wasn't part of the plan I guess even stupid officials are smart enough to cover their own asses Oops! This time, I know they're following me There you are, you Tengu bastards Think you can keep up with me?! Huh? Where am I? You don't think he got lost or something, do you? Hmm What the hell is this? Ow You don't think he got captured by the Tengu or something, do you? Hmm Where did he go? Tengu? No They're warrior priests! So that's what the Tengu really are! These are peaceful times, where the famines of the past are long gone, along with the uprisings that went with them.
Warrior priests were thought to have disappeared into the shadows of history.
I can 't believe that they've survived in this form There are only two kinds of dogs in this world, do you hear me? And those are stray dogs and pet dogs.
Stray dogs, which, in exchange for freedom, wander in the rain and eat the food of uncertainty.
Or pet dogs, which wear a collar and do nothing but eat the food of subjugation.
So tell me, which kind of dog are you?! That's right.
The ones who run this country now are stupid samurai who indulge in indolence and are interested in nothing but maintaining their power! Them, and their pet dogs who never question those samurai and simply do as they're told! And so, we do not recognize the legitimacy of their rule! We will take back this country from those people who are good for nothing but waving their swords around and killing people! But our battle is one which will make fighting itself a thing of the past.
And that grass which erases all hatred, the grass we are creating in our fields, has grown plentiful.
But there are those who would try to stop our revolution! And to those people, we will show no mercy! If they want to crush us, they'd better be prepared to pay with their lives! And today, another such interloper has appeared and has been captured.
You don't look like one of the Shogunate's dogs, though.
Who are you? What's the matter? Are you a coward who's too scared to say anything if his sword is taken away from him? That stuff you said just now, I didn't understand a damn word of it.
I see you at least have some spunk.
But there's one thing that I do understand.
It don't matter how many dogs you got here if they don't have enough courage to bark when they're by themselves.
That's a good boy You're an interesting doggie, aren't you? Perhaps I'll show you a shortcut on the path to the Amida Buddha's Western Paradise.
Listen up! We're gonna execute this guy in grand style tomorrow! We'll bury you with that head tomorrow.
Do your best to rest in peace, all right? Everything in me says that I should run away.
But I don't know what it was I couldn't stop thinking about him.
About that stray dog.
Hey, are you alive? Hello? You don't think he was caught a long time ago and is tied up in a straw mat now, do you? Hmm We'll execute both of you tomorrow.
So try to get along until then, all right? I could swear I've seen you before You have.
I'm an official from the Hakone checkpoint.
What the hell are you doing here, then? I've been following you ever since you left to make sure that you didn't escape.
Keep up the good work.
Yeah, tell me about it.
Who the hell are these guys? A bunch of warrior priests that time left behind.
--Warrior priests? --Yes.
There was a time when the priests of a temple would take up arms and fight for the people.
But with the country at peace like it is now, nobody wants people like that anymore.
But in spite of that, they still think they can change the country all by themselves.
What a bunch of morons That's for sure Agile little guy, ain't ya? It's a little trick I can do.
Let me borrow this.
Hey, what're you doing? Hey! Sorry, friend, but we need your help.
Nanmaida Fire! There's a fire! We're gonna burn alive! Oh, no! What's going on? There a fire in the storehouse! It'll spread if we don't act fast! There's a what?! Fire! There's a fire! I see that you can't bring yourself to wait until tomorrow.
That's all right, we'll make a change in plans for you.
We'll reschedule your execution and kill you right now.
Hey.
Get down.
What the--? --Damn it, where are they?! --Where'd they go?! --Find them! --Where are they?! --T-The field! --The field is catching fire! Our crop! Our revolution! You bastards, do you have any idea what you've just done?! You've destroyed our holy grass with your Well, it's almost time.
He ran away, huh? He wouldn't! Please, wait a little longer! Come on, he might be right over the horizon as we speak! Right? Well, I guess it's about time you started saying your prayers.
Look! Someone's coming! Mugen I knew it I knew you'd come! Who are you? Who, me? I'm just out jogging for my health.
Is there a problem? And without further ado Time for your execution.
You gotta be kidding me! If you're gonna come back and haunt someone, haunt your friend.
"Weak spot here" " Poop " Yes On that night, everyone loved one another.
The gates of the checkpoint were thrown open, and everyone became equals, be they government officials, thieves, or even animals.
Everyone went on dancing until morning came.
Yes, a revolution happened there, all right.
For just one night.
What do you suppose happened back there, anyway? We should just be grateful that we were able to cross the checkpoint in the confusion.
I can't believe that Mugen Not only didn't he come back by sundown, it's morning and he still hasn't shown up.
Wow, that was fun! Yeah, but it's all gone up in smoke! Don't sweat it, buddy! Yay! You jerk! Everyone went on dancing, as if in a dream.
And then, the whole incident vanished like the morning mist and was forgotten.
You proud stray dog, do you still remember? Do you remember that summer of love, in which you ran and danced and fought in the purple haze? Just kidding! Mata yo ga akereba owakare Yume wa tooki maboroshi ni Anata o oikakete ita hikari no naka de dakareru tabi Atatakai kaze o tayori As I was bathed in the light that followed on your heels Haru o tsuge odoridasu sansai Natsu o miru Uji nohara karakusa kawaku wa Aki no tsuki nobotta manmarusa o-iwai The autumn moon rises, let's celebrate its fullness Fuyu o sugi mata tsukihi o kazoeru Mada mabuta no oku ni aru itsuka no natsu toosugita aozora (Atatakakatta) Te o tsunagu hana tsukamiutau itsuya omoide Ima yobisamasu, kioku no naka de Iza arukidasu, anata no moto e I'm setting out to find my way back to you Haru o tsuge odotte sanba Natsu o miru Uji nohara karakusa kawaku wa Aki no tsuki nobotta manmarusa o-iwai The autumn moon rises, let's celebrate its fullness Fuyu o sugi, mata tsukihi o kazoeru Mata yo ga akereba owakare Yume wa tooki maboroshi ni Anata o oikakete ita hikari no naka de dakareru tabi Atatakai kaze o tayori
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