Sick of It (2018) s01e04 Episode Script

1 Jesus, I thought this was gonna be a quick job.
You know the problem, don't you? Shelving.
Soon as, like, the human race invented shelving, clutter started, cos let's face it, you got a shelf, you got to buy shit to put on it.
If you don't have the shelf, you don't have the shit.
It's like a vicious circle.
- Norma? - What? - Get rid of this? - Oh, he whistles at me when I walk past him.
It's so flattering.
No one ever wolf whistles at me any more.
- Leave it.
- No, I'm not leaving it.
No, this area's got to be sorted.
You nearly broke your neck going out the side door the other day.
It's all breeding.
I mean, you've got stuff here that you've not even opened yet.
What is it? A fondue set.
Oh, it must have been a gift.
You can't throw away gifts.
- Who gave it you then? - What? This gift that's so important.
Who gave it to you? Erm I don't remember.
Just bin it.
Whoever gave her that, didn't want it.
That's what's happened there.
There's no way they went shopping, saw that on a shelf and thought, "Oh, Norma would love a fondue set.
" That definitely didn't happen.
They were given it, and they're passing it on.
Honestly, they're like chain letters, those things.
Right.
It's a start, isn't it? - You're chucking away my memories.
- Your memories? You didn't even know who got you that fondue set.
In fact, I don't even think you knew you had one.
It's all going, it's garbage.
- You all right? - Yeah.
Just feel a bit bad about chucking Norma's gear out.
- She wasn't happy, was she? - No, but it had to be done, didn't it? Let's face it, she's never going to go through it all, is she? Clearing it out.
People just don't like chucking away their belongings.
Look at the way you were with that sofa that you got with Zoe, you didn't want to bin that, did you? Yeah, true.
- Hello? - You haven't dropped the box off yet, have you? Yeah.
Yeah, why? What's up? I can't find the photo.
What photo? The one of your Uncle Vinnie.
It was in a frame.
There weren't any pictures, there was two frames in there.
There was one of, erm Er, like a painting of flowers, a drawing of flowers and then one of that old entertainer, erm - What's his name? - AI Jolson.
Yeah, Al Jolson.
That wasn't Al Jolson.
That was your Uncle Vinnie.
Well, what's he doing blacking up? He was a minstrel.
He gave me that photo on the night we met.
Just go and get it back, will you? Could I help you? Yeah, I dropped something off this morning by accident.
I just wondered if I could get it back.
Oh, well, anyone could come in and say that and take away stuff for free.
No, honestly, I dropped it off.
It had, like, er, a fondue thing in it.
It was a box, I left it outside the door earlier.
- Well, that was you? - Yeah.
There's a sign out there saying, "Do not leave bags outside.
" There's a sign on the door saying you're open at 9:00, and you weren't.
Right, sorry about that, but I thought the thing that I want was rubbish, and it's not.
- I just want it back.
- So you're leaving your rubbish out there, are you? So does everyone else, by the looks of things.
- Can I have it back? - Well, you'll have to buy it back.
- It was mine about half an hour ago.
- Well, it's ours now.
You'll need to pay for it.
- You don't even know what it is.
- What is it then? It's a photo frame.
Well, what's so special about the photo frame? It's got a photo in it of a family member.
It's got sentimental values.
- Look, can I have it back? - Okay, picture frame, tsk, let me think Four pounds.
Four pounds? You just pick that sum out the air, did you? - Are you going to buy it then? - Yeah, fine.
Yeah, yeah, four pounds.
Bargain.
Jesus.
Four pounds, five pence.
You just said four pounds? Yeah, and five pence for the carrier bag.
You're charging me for that bag? That bag was in the box of the stuff that I dropped off.
I tell you what, you keep that, you keep the bag, sell that again.
There's your four pounds.
Right, there was a photograph in it as well.
The photograph that I want was in there.
It's not in there now, so can I have the photo back? Oh, you mean the photo of the black and white minstrel? - Yeah.
- You want it back, do you? - Yeah.
- You find that sort of thing funny? No, it's a photograph of my uncle.
You want to take it away and have a good laugh? No.
Can I have it back? - No.
- Why? Well, I've ripped it up.
Oh, right, that's what you do, is it? When people bring stuff in to raise money for charity, you just go ripping it up? Well, only the racist stuff.
But paedo stuff's all right? What are the rules in here? I'm sick of this.
Did you get it? The shop assistant ripped it up.
- Why? - 'Cause she was offended by the blacked up face, wasn't she? Well, Kim Kardashian does it.
She's always brown.
Yeah, but that's on a sun bed, innit? She hasn't blacked up.
Jesus, can't you see the difference? Uncle Vinnie looked like Mr in that photo.
Haven't you got, like, some nicer ones of him you can look at? That's not the point.
Vinnie gave me that photo on the night we met.
It meant a lot to me.
I can't believe you didn't know it was Vinnie.
It's important that you know your family history.
Is it? Heck, I've only just found out about him being part of the black and white minstrels show, and I've already been branded a racist.
How are you gonna remember me when I'm gone? I can't believe it.
Come on.
Let's go.
Go where? To where my life with your uncle began.
What are you doing? Were you sat on that? You put a bloody big crack in it.
Four quid I had to pay to get that back, and it's knackered.
It was 46 years ago that I left Eastbourne.
Do you remember the name of the dance troupe I came over with? - Er - Come on.
I told you about them.
- The Rockets, isn't it? - Yes.
Yes, the Rocketeer Belle dance troop.
I was only supposed to be in England for a week, and then I met your Uncle Vinnie.
The Sands Hotel.
That's where Vinnie and I had our first night together, right after his show.
He didn't even bother to remove his black make-up.
Listen, I know this trip is about me learning a bit about your past, but keep that sort of stuff to yourself, will you? I don't I don't wanna know.
But why? Memories are for sharing.
You didn't think that this morning, though, did you, when I tried sharing some of your memories with the charity shop? Okay, tell me about one of your favourite memories.
One of my favourites? - Skating.
- Roller skating with Zoe.
Santa Monica Boulevard.
You never told me about that trip.
When did that happen? About About six months ago, in a dream.
No, no, no, dreams don't count.
It's still a memory, isn't it? It's a memory of a dream.
One of those, like, really vivid ones when you wake up and you feel like it really happened.
I'd say that was one of the best dates we had together.
Probably right.
Someday he'll come along The man I love #And he'll be big and strong The man I love #And when he comes my way I'll do my best to make him stay It's like having Darth Vader in the car.
I tell you, you can't trust them gulls.
- Really? - Yeah, if you had a bag of chips, 'cause they like fish, don't they? They dive for fish, and now they've got a taste for chips.
Honestly they'll nick them off you.
There's the Queen's Hotel.
It's still posh.
I always wanted to stay there, but Vinnie said we couldn't afford it.
Yeah, they're all right, places like that, - but they don't give you the essentials.
- What do you mean? Well, in the rooms, you don't get your, like, you know, own kettle and your own teabags and your own coffee, cos they want you to call room service.
You know, if you want any of that, then you've got to pay extra for it.
- And they don't give you a toilet brush.
- What? Well, it's a luxury hotel, isn't it? So they don't want you feeling like you've got to clean up after yourself.
Well, then that's just embarrassing, isn't? You've got to start calling for a cleaner if you got a blockage.
I don't like it.
I think if I just push the button earlier I can, I can grab one.
It's your fault now, this, you know? Since you've cleared that shelf, she's got more room for more shit, hasn't she? You know you had one of these, don't you? I took it to the charity shop this morning.
Well, that's a good reason for me to try to get another one.
It's a right con, this.
That claw hasn't got the strength to grab anything.
Has a go but it just lets go of it like that.
It's like a robot with arthritis.
See, the problem is there's too many fruits now.
There used to just be things like cherries, blackberries and melons.
But now there's, like, kumquats, lychees, kiwi fruit, so there's more fruit, so less chance of winning.
- Whoa! - There you go! - Look at that! - Yeah, about 12 pence.
Oh, let's get a photo.
It's tacky.
Bloody hell.
Was the weather as good as this back in the day as well? Stop complaining.
- It's bloody rotten.
- That's where I used to dance.
I went through those doors twice a day in the summer of '59.
Three o'clock and seven o'clock.
- It was popular then, was it? - Oh, yeah.
All the big names, when they came to Eastbourne, that's where they went.
- What, in here? - Yeah.
It's like your flat in here.
I wonder if they have pictures of Vinnie here.
I don't think the owners know what they've got in here.
Freaks of the World.
This is the sort of history I like, Norma.
Little hairy kid here, ninety percent covered in hair.
Oh, yeah, Herr Hagg the Indian rubber man.
Have you seen this, Norma? I've seen him before.
Look at that Indian fella.
He's got such stretchy skin that he can pull his skin up over his face.
Look.
That's the dance troop I was part of.
But they've cut me off.
That's my leg there.
That's good, innit? Are you going to buy it? No! You can't see my face.
Hmm.
You can't see his face but I still knew who it was.
Get it! It's a part of you past, innit? That's what you're into.
They've cut me out.
They've erased my history.
They haven't cut you out, that's the That's just the way the camera lens They can only get so much in.
It doesn't matter that your face isn't in it.
You're not using it for a passport photo, are you? Excuse me.
My husband was involved with the black and white minstrel shows in the '50s that played at the local theatre.
I wonder, would you have any photos of those shows? No.
There's not much call for those.
To be honest, most people round here are trying to forget that ever happened.
But why? They were very popular.
They may well have been, but the point is Yeah, but there are a lot of pictures around here in black and white, so what's the difference? Yeah, leave it, Norma, come on, - they haven't got any.
- They're black and white.
She said she hasn't got any.
Thanks anyway, cheers.
- I don't understand.
- They're not gonna have any photos of Vinnie in here, are they? You know more people die in the bath than in the seas.
More drownings.
- Really? - True that.
That juice went right through me.
I'm going to go to the toilet, and then let's go.
Go? We haven't even been here that long.
It isn't the same.
I prefer to remember things the way they were, not as they are.
You've got to stop doing this.
You've got to get some new memories in your head, so you're not going on about the past all the time.
Well, the past is important to me.
It's all I've got.
I mean, let's face it, there isn't much of a future ahead of me.
Oh, my God.
What? It's Ron.
- Do you know him? - Yeah.
Look at the state of him.
He's been doing that same act since when I was dancing here.
Do you want to go and see him then? - No.
- Why not? 'Cause he was a miserable guy.
Yeah, I know, but you've just been saying how everything's changed, - so maybe he has.
- No.
- No, no.
He was a terrible person.
- Come on, listen.
Norma, he might have a picture of Vinnie.
Excuse me, is the, er, "The Amazing Man," around? Oh, Ron, yeah, he's in his dressing room, just go through.
Right, cheers.
Fuck off! I'm not on for another hour.
Ron.
It's Norma.
Vinnie's Norma.
Fuck me.
I tried for years to get you into my dressing room, and you You turn up looking like that! What happened? Vinnie finally dumped you, did he? You come here running after me? Ron, Vinnie died five months ago.
And you're still a schmuck.
Karl, I told you this was not a good idea.
How was I to know? Oh.
Ron.
I'm Karl, Vinnie's nephew.
You haven't got any, like, photos of Vinnie doing his stuff on stage, have you? Why would I? All right, sorry to bother you.
Oh.
Hang on.
Hang on.
I know someone who might have a couple.
Her name's Celia.
I don't think she's dead yet.
I've got her address in here somewhere.
He's still a schmuck.
Karl, I want you to meet Izzy.
We used to dance together here.
Oh, hi, Izzy, how are you? All right? Do I have some time for catching up? Yeah, yeah.
I'll just go and top up the parking metre if you're doing that and stretch me legs.
I'll see you back here.
- Bye.
- See you later.
- Nice to see you.
- So we were in the Here we are.
Bound to have some pictures of Vinnie in here.
Oh, goodness, look at these.
Here I am.
I was up for Miss World there.
- Posing there.
- What else.
No - You keep, you keep going, I'll just - Some more This is the one This is the one I was after! - That one? - Yeah, that one.
The charity shop ripped it up because he's got all the make up on.
Well, why does she want that one? Oh, God knows, it's been nothing but trouble.
Oh! There's one of me and Vinnie.
- That's Vinnie? - Yeah.
- Oh! - So was that Was that before Vinnie was seeing Norma? Don't know.
Oh, here we are at the Queens Hotel.
- He took you to the Queens? - Oh, yeah.
Funny, innit? Norma brought me here so I could learn about her past.
I've ended up knowing more about it than she knows.
Well Have you thought about how you're gonna break the news to her yet or what? - Well, I'm not.
- Eh? Well, what's the point? Anyway, you heard what she said earlier about not having much of a future left.
If I tell her Vinnie was seeing other women, it'll be even shorter.
- Well, I'd tell her.
- Yeah, well, you're not the one who'd have to tell her though, are you? All right, Norma? You've done the fucking chains too tight! It's like a dying fly.
I suppose we should be heading out, huh? Yeah, yeah, if you're ready, yeah.
- Goodbye, it was great seeing you again.
- Yes, see you.
You know, it's funny, he could never get the chains off, but he had no problem getting his trousers off.
You didn't have it away with him, did you? No, I would never cheat on Vinnie.
Well, listen, rather than driving back tonight, I've got us a room in there.
The Queens! Really? Yeah, well, you said you'd never stayed there.
So, I thought I'd treat you.
Give you a new memory instead of reliving all these old ones.
It isn't cheap, you know.
You're not wrong.
Just leave me all your jewellery when you die, will you? I'm leaving you everything.
Best order a skip then.
Hurry up, Norma, what are you doing in there? It's all that juice.
I got through about eight cartons today.
Guess what? There is a toilet brush in here.
Did you hear what I said? "To Celia, the love of my life.
"Love, Vinnie.
"X-X-X.
"