Superman (1996) s02e18 Episode Script
World's Finest (3)
Previously on Superman: You owe me an explanation.
Look, I've still got half the Kryptonite.
I still can finish the job.
Keep in mind, this is your last chance.
Does this mean you and Bruce? We haven't made a formal commitment or anything, but yeah, it's that serious.
This could be a fair fight after all, and who wants to see that? Evening, Ms.
Lane.
Where's Mr.
Kent? -Probably out husking some corn.
-Miss Lane? Yeah, I'm still here.
Superman's towing the ship to harbor? Can you find out how close he is? Yeah, I'll hold.
Let me guess.
You're the only one here.
Is there something I should know? -How do I contact Superman? -He's out at sea.
Never around when you need him.
Stay here.
I'm the one it's after.
Bruce? So when were you gonna tell me? The honeymoon? Stay back.
Did I miss anything? Reports indicate target acquisition negative, Mr.
Luthor, sorry.
He survived.
He lasted long enough for Superman to save him.
-Then they have the robot.
-I know.
-But, Lex, they'll trace it back to you-- -I know! Call the clown.
I need one last meeting.
How could you have lied to me like that? Now, I never actually said I wasn't Batman.
You wanna know what really galls me? I mean, beside the fact that the new man in my life is really two men? It's that I'm sitting on the hottest story of the year, "Batman Unmasked" and there's not a blessed thing I can do about it.
Then you really do love me.
I'll get some iodine for that scrape.
Burning, stinging iodine.
I see she's taking it well.
It's ironic, you know.
She likes Bruce Wayne and she likes Superman.
It's the other two guys she's not crazy about.
Too bad we can't mix-and-match.
I'm not used to being rescued.
-Thanks.
-I owed you one.
That robot tonight, it came from Lexcorp.
I can prove it.
That's why I'm here.
I figured you might want to help me bring Luthor in.
A partnership? You're joking.
I'm having trouble finding Luthor and I thought -you might have some ideas.
-I might.
She's not gonna like this, me leaving so soon -for another fight.
-Tell me about it.
That cut on your shoulder looked pretty nasty, Bruce.
I know a good doctor who.
Oh, no.
Has to be done.
I don't suppose a stern lecture on unnecessary risk-taking is going to sway you.
-Sorry.
-I didn't think so.
Just be.
Careful.
Look at all the toys.
Santa's been good to you, Lex.
Joker, we've got serious problems.
A flying wing! Twenty times bigger than Batman's and, knowing you, a hundred times as lethal.
Joker! Did you bring the rest of the Kryptonite? Right here, chrome-dome.
What's the plan? Payback.
What's so funny? Don't you get it, Harl? We're being set up to take the fall.
He can't do that.
Oh, no? How does this sound? When I heard that one of my robots had been commandeered to kill Batman I personally came here to investigate, and much to my surprise I found you two.
It'll be your word against pudding's.
I mean, Mr.
J's.
Somehow, Pooh, I don't think we're gonna get the chance to say much.
You mean he's gonna kill us? No, she is.
I abhor violence.
Now, this is funny, Mr.
J, except we're never gonna collect our billion bucks now.
True, but I see a delightful consolation prize.
Nothing like a nice big smile.
-All done.
-I love to personalize all my stuff.
Very amusing.
So how much is it going to cost me to get out of this? I'm not a material guy, Lexy.
No, what I want now is for you to know what it feels like to lose everything you have.
Everything you've ever built.
Like I lost everything to old Batboy.
We have incoming.
Bats and flyboy.
I'll be right in.
Bye-bye.
-See anything? -Luthor's been lining his buildings with lead.
It blocks my x-ray vision.
Well, there's always the direct approach.
You're learning.
A little distraction would be useful right now wouldn't you say, Lexy? I think your toys can handle this by themselves.
Besides, I'd hate to spoil my new paint job.
Now, let's see here.
Ignition.
Couldn't have done it better myself.
Helps if you're prepared.
Where's Luthor? Joker took him in the Lexwing.
He said he'd make him lose everything he ever built.
Luthor's built half of Metropolis.
Go after The Joker.
I shouldn't be long.
How's it feel, Lexy boy? Everything with your name on it is going to be rubble.
Batman.
It's always Batman.
What do you got in the way of air-to-air missiles, Lex? You're asking me for help? If I go down, you go down.
It's a red switch.
Which red--? Oh, the heck with it.
Lead-lined door.
I'll have to thank Luthor.
Who's flying this thing? Do something, for God's sake! Eenie, meenie, minie, mo.
It's gonna blow! I'll get Quinn, you take Luthor.
-Pudding.
-At this point, he probably is.
Hello, this is Angela Chen.
Though the search for Joker's body continues the Coast Guard reports it is extremely unlikely that Gotham 's most notorious criminal survived the crash.
In related news, billionaire Lex Luthor was again rigorously grilled by the DA 's office over his alleged connection to The Joker's rampage.
His statements have been questioned both by local law officials and industrialist, Bruce Wayne who announced immediate termination of his partnership with Lexcorp.
And on a lighter note Joker accomplice Harley Quinn was returned to Arkham Asylum for another round of rehabilitation.
I want a lawyer.
I want a doctor.
I want a cheese sandwich! Now that's funny.
I still wish you'd change your mind about Gotham.
I adore you, Bruce, but now there's a lot about you I don't know and I'm not sure I wanna know.
I understand.
Take care of yourself.
Come to make sure I'm leaving? Actually, I thought we worked well together.
Not that I wanna make it a regular event.
She's all yours now, if you can handle that.
But you'd better be good to her because I know where you live.
[ENGLlSH.]
Look, I've still got half the Kryptonite.
I still can finish the job.
Keep in mind, this is your last chance.
Does this mean you and Bruce? We haven't made a formal commitment or anything, but yeah, it's that serious.
This could be a fair fight after all, and who wants to see that? Evening, Ms.
Lane.
Where's Mr.
Kent? -Probably out husking some corn.
-Miss Lane? Yeah, I'm still here.
Superman's towing the ship to harbor? Can you find out how close he is? Yeah, I'll hold.
Let me guess.
You're the only one here.
Is there something I should know? -How do I contact Superman? -He's out at sea.
Never around when you need him.
Stay here.
I'm the one it's after.
Bruce? So when were you gonna tell me? The honeymoon? Stay back.
Did I miss anything? Reports indicate target acquisition negative, Mr.
Luthor, sorry.
He survived.
He lasted long enough for Superman to save him.
-Then they have the robot.
-I know.
-But, Lex, they'll trace it back to you-- -I know! Call the clown.
I need one last meeting.
How could you have lied to me like that? Now, I never actually said I wasn't Batman.
You wanna know what really galls me? I mean, beside the fact that the new man in my life is really two men? It's that I'm sitting on the hottest story of the year, "Batman Unmasked" and there's not a blessed thing I can do about it.
Then you really do love me.
I'll get some iodine for that scrape.
Burning, stinging iodine.
I see she's taking it well.
It's ironic, you know.
She likes Bruce Wayne and she likes Superman.
It's the other two guys she's not crazy about.
Too bad we can't mix-and-match.
I'm not used to being rescued.
-Thanks.
-I owed you one.
That robot tonight, it came from Lexcorp.
I can prove it.
That's why I'm here.
I figured you might want to help me bring Luthor in.
A partnership? You're joking.
I'm having trouble finding Luthor and I thought -you might have some ideas.
-I might.
She's not gonna like this, me leaving so soon -for another fight.
-Tell me about it.
That cut on your shoulder looked pretty nasty, Bruce.
I know a good doctor who.
Oh, no.
Has to be done.
I don't suppose a stern lecture on unnecessary risk-taking is going to sway you.
-Sorry.
-I didn't think so.
Just be.
Careful.
Look at all the toys.
Santa's been good to you, Lex.
Joker, we've got serious problems.
A flying wing! Twenty times bigger than Batman's and, knowing you, a hundred times as lethal.
Joker! Did you bring the rest of the Kryptonite? Right here, chrome-dome.
What's the plan? Payback.
What's so funny? Don't you get it, Harl? We're being set up to take the fall.
He can't do that.
Oh, no? How does this sound? When I heard that one of my robots had been commandeered to kill Batman I personally came here to investigate, and much to my surprise I found you two.
It'll be your word against pudding's.
I mean, Mr.
J's.
Somehow, Pooh, I don't think we're gonna get the chance to say much.
You mean he's gonna kill us? No, she is.
I abhor violence.
Now, this is funny, Mr.
J, except we're never gonna collect our billion bucks now.
True, but I see a delightful consolation prize.
Nothing like a nice big smile.
-All done.
-I love to personalize all my stuff.
Very amusing.
So how much is it going to cost me to get out of this? I'm not a material guy, Lexy.
No, what I want now is for you to know what it feels like to lose everything you have.
Everything you've ever built.
Like I lost everything to old Batboy.
We have incoming.
Bats and flyboy.
I'll be right in.
Bye-bye.
-See anything? -Luthor's been lining his buildings with lead.
It blocks my x-ray vision.
Well, there's always the direct approach.
You're learning.
A little distraction would be useful right now wouldn't you say, Lexy? I think your toys can handle this by themselves.
Besides, I'd hate to spoil my new paint job.
Now, let's see here.
Ignition.
Couldn't have done it better myself.
Helps if you're prepared.
Where's Luthor? Joker took him in the Lexwing.
He said he'd make him lose everything he ever built.
Luthor's built half of Metropolis.
Go after The Joker.
I shouldn't be long.
How's it feel, Lexy boy? Everything with your name on it is going to be rubble.
Batman.
It's always Batman.
What do you got in the way of air-to-air missiles, Lex? You're asking me for help? If I go down, you go down.
It's a red switch.
Which red--? Oh, the heck with it.
Lead-lined door.
I'll have to thank Luthor.
Who's flying this thing? Do something, for God's sake! Eenie, meenie, minie, mo.
It's gonna blow! I'll get Quinn, you take Luthor.
-Pudding.
-At this point, he probably is.
Hello, this is Angela Chen.
Though the search for Joker's body continues the Coast Guard reports it is extremely unlikely that Gotham 's most notorious criminal survived the crash.
In related news, billionaire Lex Luthor was again rigorously grilled by the DA 's office over his alleged connection to The Joker's rampage.
His statements have been questioned both by local law officials and industrialist, Bruce Wayne who announced immediate termination of his partnership with Lexcorp.
And on a lighter note Joker accomplice Harley Quinn was returned to Arkham Asylum for another round of rehabilitation.
I want a lawyer.
I want a doctor.
I want a cheese sandwich! Now that's funny.
I still wish you'd change your mind about Gotham.
I adore you, Bruce, but now there's a lot about you I don't know and I'm not sure I wanna know.
I understand.
Take care of yourself.
Come to make sure I'm leaving? Actually, I thought we worked well together.
Not that I wanna make it a regular event.
She's all yours now, if you can handle that.
But you'd better be good to her because I know where you live.
[ENGLlSH.]