Wizards of Waverly Place s03e27 Episode Script

OK, now while your mother and I are out of town on our anniversary weekend I want you guys to take care of the Sub Station's new mascot, Teddy Bear Cam per.
It's it's a bear that can camp.
Well, don't all bears camp? 'Cause they live in the woods.
Well, what's that sticking out of her belly button? - Is that a camera? - No, it's nothing! And don't block it.
It looks a lot like a camera.
Harper, come here! How's my make up? Oh! Good.
Is my face shiny? 'Cause sometimes in videos I look like a glazed donut.
Look, it's just a little old and has some stuffing sticking out.
Isn't that what Mom said about you at the beach last summer? [Justin laughs heartily.]
Dad, look, I know the last time you left us in charge of the sub shop we had a little Shakira/Uncle Kelbo problem, with the But, I'm here to promise you that nothing bad will happen this time while you're gone.
OK, honey.
I'm ready to go.
Happy anniversary, honey.
Get ready for a romantic weekend in Connecticut.
I'll get us a cab.
Bye, kids.
And remember, Teddy Bear Camper needs to greet all the customers and watch the cash register.
Mama, I thought your anniversary was, like, next month? Oh It is.
Your father forgot.
This way I'll get another trip next month when I remind him.
It's all good.
OK, bye, guys! And don't try to pull anything on me, like I'm pulling on him.
Alex, come on, get to work.
We're not gonna let Dad down this time.
Well, then maybe Dad shouldn't see anything - that would let him down.
- [gasps.]
- You can't do that.
- Oh, sure I can.
Max will take the heat.
Watch.
Max! - Yeah? - Why did you throw Dad's teddy bear into the trash? I don't know.
I just do stuff, all right? Get off my back.
That'll work.
Invite.
Invite.
Invite for you.
Hey, guys, guess what? The crossing guard accepted my friend request.
I finally have enough friends to throw a party.
- Hey! - Congratulations, Zeke.
Oh, thanks! Justin, can I start planning some party hors d'oeuvres in your kitchen? Yes, Zeke, but we're dudes.
We don't say "hors d'oeuvres.
" Munchie-wunchies? - Just say "hors d'oeuvres.
" - OK.
This is great.
I've always wanted to crash a party.
Max, you can't crash a party if you're already invited to it.
Well, then maybe I'm not invited.
So, Alex, what are you gonna wear to the party? I'm thinking my slippers, my gray sweats with holes in them, and my dad's old concert T-shirt from the band called Oingo Boingo.
That name cracks me up.
I don't - Oh, my gosh! - [woman reporter.]
The owners of this unbelievably talented dog say that he's been painting unusual pieces ever since they found him here in the Pocono Mountains That's him.
That's Mason.
He loved to paint.
I don't think so, Alex.
Every time you see a dog in a human interest story you think it's Mason.
Remember the skateboarding bulldog? Yeah, you probably just miss him so much you want to believe it's him.
- Mm-hm.
- [woman.]
Most puzzling is the picture of this girl he paints over and over.
Some would say she's a backwoods Mona Lisa.
* Well, you know everything's gonna be a breeze * * That the end will no doubt justify the means * * You can fix any problem with the slightest of ease * * Yes, please * But you might find out it'll go to your head * * When you write a report on a book you never read * * With the snap of your fingers you can make your bed * * That's what I said * Everything is not what it seems * * When you can get all you wanted in your wildest dreams * * You might run into trouble if you go to extremes * * Because everything is not what it seems * * Everything is not what it seems * * When you can have what you want by the simplest of means * * Be careful not to mess with the balance of things * * Because everything is not * What it seems * Alex, you don't even know that's Mason.
That's why I have to go.
To find out.
The last time you saw him he was running off into the Transylvania woods.
He's a wolf now.
You can't change that.
Justin, if you had a chance to be with Juliet for just one more minute, even though she's old now, would you take it? [sighs.]
Look, I'll be fine.
But all you know is that he's somewhere in the Pocono Mountains.
Max, how's your howling? [howls.]
- Never better.
- Let's go.
[Justin.]
Max! Come Are you?! [sighs.]
If Mom and Dad find out that Alex and Max got eaten by a wolf, Guess who's grounded? Me! Well, then go help her.
Zeke and I will watch the shop.
Besides, it'll give me a chance to be alone with him for our first kiss.
You're not gonna wait till the party? [scoffs.]
There's gonna be enough awkwardness at the party just with Zeke dancing, I don't wanna add a first kiss to that.
[Zeke.]
Hey, guys! I figured it out.
We're having 14-layer bean dip at my party! [moaning with delight.]
Mmm! So good! Well [clears throat.]
- Good luck with that kiss, Harper.
- Yep.
[groans.]
We've looked everywhere in these woods.
Maybe we'll have luck here.
Do it again, Max.
[howling.]
[animal returns howl.]
Knock on the door and see if they know anything.
Come on in, it's open.
I'm so sorry.
Oh, don't you mind that.
Pa is gonna fix it as soon as it's our turn for the town screwdriver.
Well, just don't stand there collecting dust.
Come on in.
Pa, put your knittin' down.
Junior we got company.
Put your shoe on.
I'm sorry, we don't mean to bother you, we just wanted to come by and talk to you about your wolf - [grunts.]
- Dog! Painting dog.
Why? We don't need no city folk looky-loos, gawking at Doug.
Uh, sir, we're not looky-loos.
We are We are from the museum.
- Mm-hm.
- Museum? Which museum? - The - The famous museum - famous - of art and statues - Statues.
Mm-hm.
- and stuff.
I heard of that.
You have? You callin' me a liar? Of course not.
We would like to have an exhibit of Doug's artwork for the museum.
Why sure, Mr.
Museum Feller.
Junior, go fetch Doug.
Pa, why don't you heat up some of your squirrel stew for these nice folks? - All right.
- Excuse me, I can't eat that.
I hate stew.
Can you put the squirrel in something else, possibly? [stammers.]
A squirrel kabob? Keep 'em coming! That dog looks just like Mason.
I need to know for sure.
Keep them busy.
Junior, can can I have a better look at Doug, over here by the by the corn? So, you guys, this is a a lovely home you have.
Can you show me around a little bit? Can you Ho-ho! Can you tell me a little bit about this here chair? Oh! That's Junior's time out chair.
Sometimes I'm bad.
- Mason, is that you? - [Justin.]
This piece of artwork over here you mind explaining it to me? There's only one way to find out.
[Ma.]
We need them to stuff a mattress for Junior.
He's gonna sleep inside soon.
[Junior chuckling.]
Oh, yeah! I've missed you so much.
Wow.
How much did you splurge on this, Jerry? [car horn honks.]
How much did you save on this, Jerry? Enough to get us a free night.
Or a hot fudge sundae.
This room costs the same as a hot fudge sundae? Yeah, but if you get nuts, then it's more than the room.
Hey, look, my spy bear's hooked up.
Let's see what's going on.
What?! They threw my teddy bear cam in the trash? I'm gonna call and find out what's happening.
- [dial tone.]
- A dollar a minute?! * [rapping.]
Hey, Zeke, why you smart? * * I don't know, I'm just good I know it [grunts.]
* Hi.
Uh Zeke, I just wanted to thank you for staying here with me while our friends are out looking for their dog.
I would have been here all alone.
And now it's just you and I here.
All alone.
Yeah, I hate being alone.
But, I'm probably alone a lot because I'm not a very good listener.
I mean, I didn't even know Justin had a dog.
Well, since it's just you and me here alone, maybe we should talk about taking the next step in our relationship.
Is your arm OK? You keep doing this with it? It's it's fine, Zeke.
Well, I definitely agree.
As long as that next step in our relationship involves better listening.
Because Justin probably told me he had a dog and it just went blah-blah-blah in this ear, and blah-blah-blah out that ear.
Just forget about the dog, OK? [telephone rings.]
We're busy! So, where were we? I was cleaning that table.
Mm-mm! Now that is some yummy-licious squirrel, Pa.
You sure you don't want some, Museum Lady? Well, why don't I fix some possum pie after we do some music entertainin'? Squirrel kabobs and a show? I love me the country life.
Am I holding this thing upside down, or should I 'Cause It doesn't matter.
All right, boys, follow along now.
A one and a two, and a one, two [bluegrass music.]
- Alex? - Mason! You changed me back.
Thank you.
I didn't do it.
[chuckles.]
You was right, Ma.
That news story snagged us some wiz-ards.
They're just like us.
Who changed you back? - We did.
- How? Who cares? I've got Mason back.
Yep, Junior.
They's wizards like us.
No, they ain't.
We're country wizards.
Oh my gosh, country wizard wands.
Hey, what's going on? And how did you get Mason? Hold your horses, Alex.
They got hairpin triggers.
Don't get them riled up.
Sorry, I guess some of their quaint country colloquialisms have rubbed off on me.
We went through our portal to check the squirrel traps in the Transylvania woods.
Yep.
We found Mason, took him in, had ourselves a new huntin' dog, so Junior here don't have to fetch the game in his mouth no more.
Nope.
When we weren't huntin', we kept Mason in the shed where he commenced to paintin' pictures of a pretty girl.
Since we found him in the Transylvania woods, we figured she was a wizard girl.
Ah-ha! Then you convinced the people from the television program to do a piece on an "artistic dog" to attract another wizard family to you.
No.
We got the folks in the TV box to do a movin' picture show on a fancy drawin' dog to lure another wizard clan to us.
OK So we're here.
Now what? - We want your portal.
- What?! You see that? To the world, it's an outhouse.
To us, it's our Lair with our portal inside.
By the way, I stitched that.
The dang county lawman told us we had to build an indoor bathroom, and then they bulldozed our Outhouse Lair.
Dad would have really liked sitting in an Outhouse Lair.
Every wizard family only gets one portal.
So you guys have no way back into the wizard world.
Here's what I'm proposin': You give us your portal and we let wolf-boy here go home with Missy.
- Deal.
- No deal! You country wizards is e-vil.
See, now you got me gesticulatin' and figgerin' like yous do.
That's e-vil.
Look, I know how much you and Mason care for each other, but I'm sorry.
There's no way we can give up our portal.
I hope you can understand one day.
Ma, Pa, please let Mason go with me.
I love him.
It's not like he's any use to you.
If you ain't gonna make a deal, you best get.
Now! Move it! Not you.
Justin! We can't leave Mason.
There's nothing we can do, Alex.
We've got to get out of here.
These guys mean business.
- You still here? - Get off our land! - Come on! - Wait.
I have to say goodbye to Mason.
Oh they changed you back.
I'll trade you our portal for Mason.
Wait for me to flash you into our Lair.
Hey.
Hi.
Excuse me.
Before I go, you think I can have a squirrel doggie bag? Perhaps wrapped in foil, in the shape of a crab? Son, you make less than no sense.
- You just made yourself an enemy - Come on! I'm Zeke, I'll be your server.
Zeke, what color are my eyes when you look real close? Oh, The distance has no effect on the eye color.
If it's hazel from here, it's hazel from there.
[sighs.]
I knew dating a younger woman would have its challenges.
So, how'd it go? Pretty good.
I ate squirrel, made some new enemies It was a regular day.
So, how'd it go? How'd it go? - Was it Mason? - Yes.
It was him, but he's being held by some country wizards who grow corn by their beds, and have a son with one shoe.
Oh, good.
I thought you were gonna say something crazy.
[coughing.]
I was on my ninth layer of the bean dip and I got a jalapeño seed stuck in my throat.
Get cough [imitates coughing.]
- Ah! It's stuck in my nose! - [both shouting.]
Now it's in my eye! It's a traveling jalapeno seed! I'll go get the eye wash.
[high-pitched screaming.]
Zeke, this party has you all stressed out, man.
It's not the party, man.
It's Harper.
I think she's trying to get me alone so she can kiss me.
It's my first time.
I know.
- I really think you should do it.
- [Zeke.]
Yeah? Take it from someone who has had a ton of experience in amour.
Alex! We are pleased as punch you decided to make the swap, Missy.
I'd swap anything for Mason.
Giving up your portal is an enormous sacrifice, Alex.
Are you sure you won't ever regret this? [scoffs.]
Regret is for the weak.
That's my Alex, lovely and scary.
Well, let's get this show on the road.
[Justin.]
Get what show on the road? Alex, what are you doing?! What are they doing here? Who cares? I've been waiting for this opportunity.
Ahh hello.
Welcome to my home.
Are you hungry? Can I get you something to eat? You get nothing.
[laughs.]
Revenge is sweet, isn't it? Alex, I will not let you give away our portal.
Oh, I am so sorry, my dear brother, but you are too late to stop me from trading our portal for Mason's return.
You Look at the door! You see? Our portal will soon be removed by their mighty lumberjack saw.
- [chuckles.]
Yep.
That's me.
- [saw hums.]
Oh, well then, we should show them the door.
Which is right behind me.
Purple.
Yes, yes.
Now, you guys go check it out, because once we trade, there's not any un-trades.
Sure is dark.
It's the energy-saver model.
Oh, they're goin' green, Ma.
Uh, the light switch is there over to the left.
Further.
Further.
A little bit further.
Little bit yeah.
- [Pa.]
Hey! - [Ma.]
You tricked us! We got no powers in here! - It's locked.
- [pounding on door.]
Knock knock.
Who's there? Disappear.
Disappear who? Dis appears to be a door eaten by termites.
That was amazing! Instantly picked up on Alex's game.
Yep, my skills are sharp.
Razor sharp.
- Where did you send them? - I don't know.
They're just floating in some magical limbo somewhere.
But who cares? The important thing is that we're back together.
[whines.]
No! What happened? Well, maybe you broke your deal with them, so they broke their deal with you.
What am I gonna do, Justin? I don't know.
[dog whines.]
I can't believe it.
My true love is a wolf again.
The fact that I have to say "again" at the end of that sentence just shows how messed up our lives really are.
It's fine.
All right, we just gotta find a way to turn him human again.
Does anyone have any ideas on how we can do that? Does anyone else have any ideas on how we can do that? [howling.]
He's trying to tell us something.
Wait, oh my gosh, I love him so much, I'll probably know what he's saying.
[howling.]
Yes, Mason.
I do look good right now.
Is that really what he said? I'm assuming.
OK, there's gotta be a better way for us to do this.
Maybe Maybe there's a wand app.
[clears throat.]
Restaurant locator spell calculator [gasps.]
Here's an application to turn my wand into a light saber.
- How fun! - [wand hums.]
[raspy voice.]
Max I am your brother.
Look, there's an animal translator app.
It translates animal sounds into human voices.
Oh, that thing doesn't work.
I tried it on my pet frog once and all it kept saying was: "Keep this guy away from me.
Keep this guy away from me.
" It made no sense.
- All right, Mason.
Say something.
- [howling.]
[Mason.]
I am in love with you, Alex Russo.
Aw, look at that.
Even as a wolf with a weird, robotic translator voice, he's still charming.
- Charming.
- [Mason.]
If we can go back to the country wizards' trailer, I believe their charmed jug band instruments had something to do with turning me human.
Did you hear that? There's hope after all.
This is incredible.
It looks like we're going back to that old trailer in the middle of nowhere to find some magical instruments that'll turn your boyfriend human again.
You're right.
Our lives are messed up.
OK, now I just need to let it set.
Honey, I'm gonna take you out to an expensive anniversary dinner, then we're gonna have a long conversation about our feelings, and maybe afterwards I'll do that really romantic thing where the man puts the jacket over a puddle so the woman can walk across it.
Really? Jerry, you'd ruin your good jean jacket for me? Of course I would, honey.
Oh, Jerry, thank you.
This is shaping up to be the best - [computer chimes.]
- Hey look, the teddy bear cam's back on.
Quick, throw me my jean jacket! You know I love to wear it when I'm sleuthing! Um Zeke? Could you come here for a second? Harper, you're not going to believe this.
I was bussing tables and I found some sort of a high-tech toy.
I think it's got half a binocular in it.
Oh! Oh, you got me a little something.
'Cause we're boyfriend and girlfriend and that's what they do, give each other gifts.
No.
I got it out of the garbage.
But you can still have it.
I'm gonna warn you though, it's reeks of tuna.
Oh.
Which is unfortunate Bears prefer salmon.
Oh! Well, a gift is still a gift.
So let me just say "thank you.
" [coughing.]
Hey, what's going on in here? Nothing.
What's going on with you? Nothing.
Really? Because it looks like the three of you just walked out of the vegetable cooler with a dog that I never knew you had.
Well, um - Justin? - Yes! Yes, we did.
And I have an answer for that.
This is a This right here - Sled dog.
- That's right.
That's right.
- That is right.
It is a sled dog.
- Sled dog.
We actually got him from an animal shelter over in - over in Greenland.
- [Alex.]
Mm-hm.
Which is why we brought him back, he wants to go back in.
Because it's cooler in there.
- Yeah.
- Much more like Greenland - Like home.
Yes.
- where he's from.
- Snow.
- [Alex.]
Home.
Also, when he howls, we can understand what it means.
What? I didn't want you guys to do all the explaining.
OK, Alex.
I'm so glad you found your sled dog.
But he has no business being in a food preparation area.
So you guys just need to go.
Right now.
Yes, yes, good.
Because we have so many more important things to take care of.
- So we're gonna - Yeah, and let's just say that they have nothing to do with us understanding the thoughts of a magical wolf.
Are you serious? Right now.
Oh, and Zeke.
Why didn't I get an invite to your party? - I did invite you to my party.
- No, you didn't.
Just keep that in mind.
You didn't.
All right.
[chuckles.]
Good luck on all that important stuff you guys have to do.
Yeah.
I'm sure Zeke and I will be fine.
Just the two of us.
Alone.
With no one else around.
Actually, Harper, I got a bunch of stuff to do.
I gotta plan this party Forget it then! Just forget it! I give up! I'm never going to get you to kiss me, Zeke Beakerman! I knew she wanted to kiss me.
I am so good at reading women.
"Good at reading women.
" I taught that kid everything he knows.
Jerry, I think you missed the point.
Harper and Zeke are in charge of our restaurant and our kids just came out of the Lair with a wolf.
You're right.
We gotta get out of here.
Let's go.
I'll pack the hotel towels.
You get the soaps and the sewing kit.
OK, quick.
Everybody look around.
Great.
I say we get the last of the squirrel kabobs then get out of here.
No, we have to find those magical jug band instruments.
Spread out and look.
- Clear over here.
- Nothing here.
Oh, I found one! Max, that's not an instrument.
That's a wooden bucket with spit in it.
[groans.]
[howls.]
What is it, boy? What are you trying to tell us? Is there trouble at the old mill? Justin, what are you doing? We have a translator app.
I thought it would be more dramatic this way.
Which is fun for all of us because All right, I'm doing it.
[Mason.]
The charmed jug band instruments are in this chest.
He must have used his keen sense of wolf smell to track them down.
Good job.
Or it says "Magic Musicalizin' Doodads" on the top.
Instruments are in here.
So if we just play these, maybe it'll turn Mason into human again.
OK.
I'll play the banjo.
Alex, you blow into this jug.
Max, washboard's all yours, buddy.
Mason, you're on the spoons, buddy.
- All right.
- Really? You're gonna give an instrument that requires thumbs to a wolf? - I figured he had a better chance than Max.
- Hey! You're probably right.
Right there.
All right, let's do this.
All right, OK.
A-one, a-two, a-one, two, three.
[off-key music.]
Why isn't this working? Because we don't sound good.
Do you even know how to play the banjo? Excuse me, your wolf boyfriend is terrible at the washboard.
- [dog whimpers.]
- [engine starts.]
What's going on? [groans.]
Trailer's being towed! Their trailer! Grab an instrument! Everyone grab an instrument and run! - Wait! I've got a better idea.
- Is magic really a better idea? Probably not.
But it involves a lot less running than your plan.
Harper I've been thinking about our relationship, and I think it's time we took things to the next level.
Oh, let me guess.
You want to see if we can keep our eyes open while we sneeze.
- I'll get the pepper.
- No, no, no.
I was aiming for something a little lower on the face.
Like the mouth area.
The mouth area? Well, that means It sure does.
- [crashing.]
- [Zeke.]
What was that?! Oh, come on! Nice.
[gasps.]
It's! There's! [groans.]
This was your bright idea? To replace the sub car with the trailer? Well, hey, it got us out of carrying all these instruments back home, didn't it? What's going on? How did this old trailer get in here? Oh, my gosh.
He's relentless.
I have to tell him.
Ah! Nope, nope! Zeke, this trailer has been here for like a few days, man.
I mean, isn't that right, Harper? Please skip me.
No, it hasn't.
It's always the subway car, for sub sandwiches.
This is a trailer.
What do you sell now? Trail mix?! Um Actually, it's um it's a new hillbilly theme that we're testing out for the restaurant.
We play jug band music and everything.
All right.
Come on everybody, let's play him something to show him how true this story that I am telling him is.
[twangy music.]
Hey, that's a classic clogging tune.
A Mule in the Hen House.
I think it's missing an instrument or two, but I could probably still dance to it.
Oh, yeah! Yeah, I can still dance to this! Shoulda brought my clogs! [whines.]
- That was close.
- Mmm.
[screams.]
Mason, you're back! Sort of.
Hello, love.
[laughs.]
Hang on! Wait a second! Did you guys see that? Did you see that?! He was all, "Hello, love".
[making grunting sounds.]
What is going on?! [stammers.]
Well.
.
Zeke, I totally understand [mimics grunting sounds.]
the confusion with But, I got Max? Oh, now you want my help? Would someone please tell me what's going on? Because I just saw your pet sled dog from Greenland, who lives in your veggie cooler, turn into a half-human, half-bear-hairy-creature-thing! What is going on?! I deserve some answers! [Justin.]
Zeke, you all right? [grunts, gasps.]
Where am I? What happened? You passed out after your kiss with Harper.
I kissed Harper? No wonder I feel so manly and confident.
I dreamt I was this dog that turned into this powerful man-dog.
I don't even care that all of you saw me faint.
I can handle anything now.
I've kissed a person! Yes, you have, honey.
Now let's go brag to people we don't even know.
[Zeke.]
OK! - Hey! I've kissed a person! - I was that person.
All right, we saw the teddy bear camera, and we know you're guilty of something.
Great, Theresa.
Now they know about the teddy bear cam.
And we don't have [shouts.]
There's a! It's! [groans.]
What did you do to the sub car? Yeah! What did you do to the sub car? Please tell me it's permanently gone? You better have a good explanation for this, young lady.
Actually, I do.
Would you like the long version or the short version? I don't care.
Either way, you're gonna end up grounded.
So, go ahead.
OK, it's OK for you to come in now, Mason.
Well, when Mason was a wolf, he was living in this trailer, with a family who tried to take our portal, but then, but then, I tricked those country wizards Yeah! And their wands were sticks with leaves All right, all right, I do care.
Gimme the short version.
Oh.
All right.
Well, the short version is, I did all this because I love Mason and I wanted to get him back.
I don't know if I'm just swept up by the romance of our anniversary weekend, but I'm getting the sense that Alex loves Mason and wanted to get him back.
That's because she just said that, Mr.
Russo.
No.
I don't think so.
I think I'm coming to that realization on my own, in the moment.
Oh, boy.
This is more romantic than the time you guys were kissing in the rain.
What? I love a happy ending.
Alex, I'm so glad your feelings for me haven't changed, even though I may look like this for the rest of my life.
What? No, no.
You're not gonna look like this for the rest of your life, right? Tell him, Justin.
- Justin? - Well I mean, obviously, the instruments didn't work.
And until I can figure out why, I believe that Mason will be stuck in this "in-between stage," we'll call it.
[Jerry.]
It's OK.
No one's gonna suspect a thing.
Lots of kids have beards these days.
Not on their eyelids, Dad.
Oh.
At least we're together.
And Alex still loves me.
Mm-hm.
Yes, I do.
Zeke! Zeke! Zeke! Zeke, look, all I'm saying is that I need your help.
You said that our song was missing an instrument.
Did you figure out what instrument that was? I'm sorry, Justin.
Now that I've had my first kiss, I'm totally different.
I can't be bothered with trivial stuff like that.
I only do awesome stuff now.
Well, that's good, because jug band music is awesome.
- You think so? - I know so.
Well, in that case, you're missing a mouth harp.
[imitates instrument.]
Yes! Ah, the siren sound of backwoods America.
Find that, my friend, and you have your song! - Ah.
- [sighs.]
I'm not really that different, am I? Yeah.
No, not really.
OK, keep going! Keep up, keep up, come on! Alex, stop.
[panting.]
We spent all afternoon in a dark theater.
It's beautiful outside.
Why are we running home? [panting.]
Because you know what a physical fitness nut I am.
All right.
Let's get inside.
Physical fitness nut? Darling, you turn the TV on it's side so you can watch it laying down.
I'd like to sit outside for a while.
That's what happens when you stay in a tanning bed too long.
Be careful.
That's right, be careful.
Great.
Yes.
Outside.
All right.
Well OK.
Look! Let's read newspapers and sit outside.
Come on.
OK.
OK.
OK, isn't this great? OK, hurry up and read yours.
OK.
You know, I'm really looking forward to going to Zeke's party with you tonight.
Oh, was that tonight? I I thought it already happened and we missed it.
Oh, well.
We'll catch the next one.
- No, it's tonight.
- Mmm.
Mm-hmm.
Well, these newspapers could do the trick.
Bet you if we cut some eyeholes it could work.
I don't understand.
Is this a game? Oh, my goodness! You guys won't believe what just happened! OK.
Zeke kissed me hello and then he fainted again! What if he kisses me at the party and faints there? We're gonna be the second most embarrassing couple at the party.
Well, who's first? I don't know.
Well, it sounds like it would be best if you didn't go to the party, either.
Wait, you're not going to the party? But you two have to go to the party.
- Why? - I don't know.
You know, it would be fun to go to a party, Alex.
I mean, I'd love to meet your friends, mingle, get to know Oh, I don't have any friends.
Well, I'm your friend and I want you to go.
You see? Your only friend wants you to go.
Now I'm beginning to understand why Justin has robot friends.
[loud rock music.]
Excuse me! Everyone! Can I have everyone's attention, please? Hi.
Has anyone seen my best friend, Justin? He was supposed to come relieve me as DJ so I could mingle.
No? [loud music resumes.]
Wow.
Look at this place.
Zeke's a Zeke's apartment's amazing.
This elevator goes right up into it.
I know.
I thought I was gonna have a little bit of time in a hallway to come up with a plan.
A plan for what? A plan for how to get to Pittsburgh from Philadelphia.
Mm-hmm.
Now keep your map up and stick to the shadowy area.
All right! Yeah! Good-looking guy! Good-looking girl! All right.
Harper.
Where've you been? I haven't seen you since our big smooch sesh.
Let's dance! Let's let's slow dance, instead.
OK, sure.
[slow music.]
* When all is said and all is done * * Everything will change but what's insane * * Winter, spring, summer, fall * Hello, party, that I was not invited to.
Consider yourself crashed.
Hey, Zeke, thanks for not inviting me, buddy.
Good night, everybody! How about we fold the maps up and go mingle? How about we keep the maps up and mingle, OK? - Hey, how's it going? - Pretty good.
I heard there's this crazy, hairy kid at the party.
I came as soon as I got the text.
Where? I've gotta see this.
He's talking about you.
Why'd you put your map down? I get it, Alex.
You're worried about what other people think of the way I look.
Well, I - [grunts.]
- [camera clicks.]
What? No! Who? You mean them? Oh, my gosh.
Everybody sees us.
You're ashamed of me, aren't you? No.
I don't know.
Maybe.
It's just that you have hair on your forehead.
And you walk in a circle like ten times before you sit.
[elevator dings.]
I'm sorry you feel that way.
I guess I'll leave you alone so I won't have to embarrass you anymore.
Alex, what are you doing? I don't know.
I couldn't help it.
People were pointing and laughing.
Alex, what I've always loved about you is that you don't care what other people think.
I can't even do that.
My boyfriend was embarrassing me so I kissed him so he'd pass out.
But you're better than that.
That's why we're such good friends.
I mean, it doesn't matter how over-the-top I am, you've never made me feel weird about it once.
Even when I had that cupcake hat.
I mean, it was a cupcake on my head.
How could you not comment on that? Harper, I put up with that, because you put up with me.
I think it's a fair trade.
Well, it seems like Mason is having to put up with something right now.
You already lost him once.
Don't let a little thing like you have to brush his face make you lose him again.
- Thank you, Harper.
- You're welcome.
I don't have my wand, but I want to keep this dramatic moment, - so I'm just gonna use my hand.
- OK.
- Mason, I need to talk to you.
- Oh? Are you sure? - The doorman might see us together.
- Please, I'm sorry.
I was completely wrong to act that way.
What we have is so much stronger than any of that superficial stuff.
The most important thing to me is that you're back and we're together.
I love you, no matter what.
I don't know if I can believe you.
- Then let me prove it.
- How? The same way people have been doing it for centuries now, by slow dancing to a romantic pop song.
[elevator dings.]
[* Year Without Rain.]
* Ooh ooh ooh Ooh ooh ooh * * Ooh ooh ooh * Ooh ooh ooh * Ooh ooh ooh * Can you feel me * When I think about you? * With every breath I take * Every minute no matter what I do * * My world is an empty place * Like I've been wandering the desert * * For a thousand days * Ooh * Don't know if its a mirage * But I always see your face * Baby I'm missing you so much * * Can't help it I'm in love * * A day without you is like a year without rain * * I need you by my side Don't know how else to find * * A day without you is like * You know, under normal circumstances I'd kiss you right now.
Yeah, I'm still kind of working on that.
- [Harper laughs.]
- How 'bout a hi-five with a loving gaze? - Wanna do the dance? OK.
- Let's do it.
* The stars are burning * I hear your voice in my mind * Alex! Alex, I found it! The last piece to complete Mason's transformation, the mouth harp! Oh, Justin, thank you.
But I don't really need you to do that anymore, it kind of undermines the whole speech I gave about being superficial.
Mason and I are kind of above all that now.
All right, I You know, just figured you'd need it because [soft roar.]
over here with [clears throat.]
Well Who are we kidding? Justin! Do it, man.
I'm hideous.
[clears throat.]
Did it work? Do I look handsome? [laughs.]
Yes, it worked.
But you always look handsome.
Thank you, Justin.