40 Dates and 40 Nights (2026) Movie Script
1
[upbeat dramatic music]
I'm kinda waiting for the one
Who keeps my heart beating
More of the one
I'm feeling right now
Keeps repeating
Never know
If I don't let go
I gotta know
There is a list of what
Is right and what is wrong
I wanna do it all
Make on this on my own
I gotta know
I gotta go
[upbeat dramatic
music quiets down]
[water runs]
-[phone rings]
-Wow.
Welcome to Bing Bop Toys,
home of the talking Teddy Bears.
This is Leah.
All right, cut the crap.
You're off the clock.
[chuckles]
Whoa, what?
What are you doing working
on a weekend, you psycho?
My Manolos don't
pay for themselves.
Where are you?
-I'm at... I'm at Buzz's.
-Oh.
The part-time
bubble soccer instructor?
He's athletic.
Is that what we're
calling it these days?
He's hot.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
-Oh.
-[Buzz singing]
-Show me the room.
-I'm not showing you the room.
-Show me the room.
-Fine.
Ew.
Ugh. Who are you dating again?
His name is Ben.
At least I think it is.
There's been a couple this
month, so it's been confusing.
Yeah, I know,
you have a menagerie of Bens.
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
Anyway, ew, oh,
okay, I'm hanging up.
-Bye.
-[phone chimes]
[Bianca clears throat]
Hey.
Hey, uh...
You're on the pill, right?
Why?
Uh, you know, it's actually,
it's probably fine. [laughs]
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Uh, what's...
what's probably fine?
Okay, word.
Um...
It snapped.
It snapped?
Yeah, like... pfft.
Snapped.
No, I know what that means.
In half.
-Phew. Okay, okay.
-Cool.
We can go to the store.
We'll go to the store,
and that's cute.
We can go
to the pharmacy together.
No, I can't.
You can't?
No.
I'm getting ready
for my callback, babe.
It's like a possible
callback, so...
That's not how callbacks work,
I'm pretty sure.
Look, you're really, really hot.
Thank you.
Like I really would like
to just...
Again.
You're awesome.
Like, a solid six outta 10.
Here. It's not
a bad place to be.
But my career's kinda like
taking off right now, you know?
And I can't have anybody
getting in the way of that, so.
I mean, it wouldn't
be fair, you know?
To the fans.
To your fans?
The fans from
the background modeling job
that you did for Home Goods?
Those fans.
I got like 250 followers
outta that gig. [laughs]
I'm crushing it.
Right.
So, if you would excuse me.
I got a callback
to prep for. [grunts]
[Exhales]
[soft ethereal music]
Running a little
low over here, Tilda.
How long has it been
since we lost Buddy?
It'd be five years
this Saturday.
Sweet man.
Lord rest his soul.
He gave you
a wonderful life, Georgia.
Don't give him all the credit.
We built that saddle
company together.
-He was lovely.
-He was a prince.
Unlike my scoundrel of an ex.
Screw him and the horse
he rode in on.
I'm ashamed to say it might have
been on one of our saddles.
[all laugh]
I just love our
little gatherings.
[all laugh]
So, Marly is getting
ready for her first baby?
And you got one marching
down the aisle soon, Edith.
June 7.
Don't you forget it.
What?
What?
-Well?
-Well, what?
Come on, Georgia, how's Leah?
How's my drink, Tilda?
[Tilda exhales deeply]
[spoon clinking]
[languid guitar music]
[door chimes]
Of course.
[clears throat]
Excuse me.
Hi.
You, yeah.
Um hi, could I get a Baby Free.
Hmm?
Could...
Could I get a Baby Free?
A what?
A Baby Free.
What is that?
Could I get
into this box, please?
[chuckles]
I see you.
-Nice.
-Okay.
-Do you have the key?
-No, I don't. Uh...
I gotta get my
manager for that.
Great, that'd be great.
Scarlett?
Scarlett?
What do you need Scarlett for?
Oh, she needs the Baby Free.
Oh.
That's me.
Yeah, I don't
know where she's at.
No, me neither.
Well,
could you call her, please.
-Oh, yeah.
-Totally.
[Voice amplified on P.A.]
Hey, Scarlett,
got a customer
that needs a Baby Free.
Can you bring up the safe sex
keys for the Baby Free?
Scarlett?
It'll just be
a couple of minutes.
Yeah.
Scarlett, she's in a hurry.
We gotta get the Baby Free out.
Hey, baby!
-Hi.
-What's the brand you prefer?
Um I don't know if
I heard correctly,
but I think she might
need the Baby Free.
And I'll do the box of extra-
long Platinum Ultra-Guards.
Certainly. [laughs]
[keys jingling]
You can't wield a sword
without a shield, now, can we?
-Uh, no.
-Straight facts.
Scarlett, please.
-Oh.
-Hi.
So, do you like, party, or...?
Oh my God.
Mm-hmm.
So helpful.
Congrats.
Thank you.
I'm single if you wanna hang.
I bet he's got weak swimmers.
I'll bet he doesn't.
I took Baby Free once.
Felt like I shot a cannonball
from my lady bottom.
Oh, God.
God, you know, the things
men will never understand.
Let's egg Buzz's car and then
get you back out there.
Okay, yeah, no.
Let's just wait until after
my ovaries are done arguing
like my parents used to.
-Okay.
-Okay.
Babe, you should
really come out tonight.
I'm meeting Ben Number 3 at that
place with the sticky floors.
The sticky floors?
-Yeah.
-Wow.
No, I won't be there.
He has friends.
Good for Ben Number 3.
I mean, when was
the last time you went out?
Like, actually out, out?
I was just out
with you the other day.
No, it's been
like four months.
Okay, okay, you know what?
Maybe I'll come tonight.
-Liar.
-Yeah.
Margaret, can you
leave the rent check
on the counter in
the morning, please?
Margaret?
-[Leah knocks]
-Margret?
-Oh, no.
-[footsteps tapping]
I'm not moving in with you.
Did she get deported?
Is she from Canada?
I don't know, I literally
never talk to her.
I don't speak
to her either, clearly.
She misspelled opportunity.
And then she just left?
Yeah, she just left.
And our rent is
due on Thursday, so...
How about her
security deposit?
No, Mr. Smith already let
us dip into that last month.
Also, he keeps asking when
you'll be back, by the way.
[Gigi laughs]
Just get a new
roommate, that's easy.
Easy? Do you know how
much effort it takes
to find a sane roommate?
How about that
Craigslist thingie?
Oh, that's so depressing.
What?
What's the matter with you?
Let's see, Buzz dumped me.
After he admitted
that the condom broke, so.
Well, you're on
the pill, aren't you?
No.
No, I haven't been on the pill.
Not since I gained 30
pounds of water weight
and Veronica Summers told me
I looked like a bean bag chair.
-That's incredibly stupid.
-Okay.
Besides,
the right guy is gonna like you
no matter what shape you are.
News flash,
love, it's extinct.
It is, it's like dial-up
and the dodo bird, okay?
Do you know how marriage began?
I can tell you, marriage
began by fathers trading
their daughters for the
fattest pig in the county fair.
That was marriage back then.
Now, now, it is just,
it is a freaking desert,
I'm telling you.
You know
who survived the desert.
Jesus Christ.
Yeah, Him.
I mean, after it was over,
He went home for a minute,
but then He went
right back out into the world.
Mm-hm. And, Gigi, did you
read the rest of the story?
Because I hate to
break it to you,
things didn't work out too
well for Him in the end.
Well, he had a big following.
Mm-hmm.
You know,
I think 40's a good number.
What, 40?
-What's happening?
-[Gigi laughs]
I'll tell you what--
I have an idea.
-Oh, God.
-Okay.
You go on 40 dates
outside your apartment.
And if, after that,
you have found a guy
who's totally a keeper,
I will pay your rent for a year.
Okay, or you could
just loan me the money,
and I'll pay you back
in interest.
[Laughs] No,
we're not gonna do that.
You're gonna have
to earn it this time.
I'm not baling you out again.
And no doubling up
on these guys.
And no hanky-panky.
No hanky-panky?
-That's right.
-No...?
And I guarantee you
that at the end of 40 days
and 40 nights,
you will have found
somebody so special
that he will have you running
every red light in town
just to get a kiss.
Mm. Wow.
Okay, and then what
happens, you know,
if I find my true
love by date one?
Why go on 39 more?
Because it's not the deal.
You realize I'm only
gonna be proving to you
that men suck?
[Gigi laughs]
Is it a yes?
Wow.
[clears throat]
You can sleep on it.
No, yeah,
I-I should sleep on it.
Mm-hmm.
Otherwise,
there's the county fair.
Okay.
Your grandma's literally
trying to pimp you out.
Yeah, she thinks I'm a hermit.
Well, you're on your way there.
I mean, at least
I can pay for rent with that.
I mean, all you gotta do
is swipe right on 40 randos,
be nice, and then boom.
You're pimped.
Do you wanna know
the real kicker?
What?
I have to abstain.
-Ugh. Ew.
-I know.
And, like,
what if I meet a sociopath?
I dated a sociopath once.
Oh my God, that's right.
-Crazy Pete.
-Crazy Pete.
Oh, he was sweet.
Hey, when's the last time
you really put yourself
into something?
I put myself in the car every
morning when I go to work.
I do.
Okay, hey, don't
take this the wrong way,
but you don't really
have a thing right now.
Yeah, I know.
We get it, I'm single.
Even I'm trying a new thing.
-What? You have a thing?
-Yeah.
Why didn't you tell me
that you had a new thing?
I go again tonight.
You wanna come?
Prove to Geege
you're not living under a rock.
White wine or tequila?
Girl.
-Water.
-[Leah laughs]
-Yeah, okay.
-Okay.
[Mavis] Straight legs,
straight legs, gorgeous.
Anna, not like that.
No.
Clench ladies, clench.
-Turn, spin.
-[Leah] I'm gonna kill her.
B?
I thought you were joking.
You should chug that.
Welcome back, Bianca!
And who's your friend?
Oh, Leah, yes, very new.
Aerial virgin. Welcome.
I am Mavis.
[both inhale and exhale deeply]
Okay, let's pop that cherry.
-Let's pop that cherry.
-Yeah, marvelous!
Oh.
Do you not remember?
I literally had to take
a special gym class
because my upper body
strength was so bad.
Veronica Summers used
to throw kickballs at me
and make me fall off
the climbing rope.
Love, we should really unpack
this with a professional.
Okay, ladies, once
you are done stretching,
we'll get to climbing.
If either of you are on
a juice cleanse or a detox,
please use the bathroom
first before you...
We just got the mats cleaned.
-Oh my God.
-Okay.
-Yeah.
-Thank you.
No problem.
Hey, you're stronger than
you were in high school!
You got it.
-Like that?
-Yeah.
Just see yourself
at the top of it.
You visualize.
-I'm just gonna run.
-No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
[Bianca] At least you
left the house yesterday.
[Leah] I leave the house.
Yeah, for morning-after pills.
You know, her terms
are completely insane.
It's like, no sex?
You can't even buy a car
without driving it
around the block first.
[both laugh]
I don't know,
maybe I'll do it with you.
No, really, I'll swear off
sex if you do it too.
It'll be a good
test for the Bens.
Wait, you would,
you would really wait for me?
Not for you, with you.
Why can't we just
be in love together?
Because my lower half
doesn't want your lower half.
Okay.
-Scratch it.
-Okay, okay.
[telephone ringing]
[soft pensive music]
You don't really have
a thing right now.
[cup taps]
[phone chimes]
Oh, God.
[Edith] My eyes don't
allow for this game.
But your liver spots
are glowing.
Oh.
When do these dates start?
Tonight.
You're not worried
about her going out
with all these strangers?
Ooh, what if she
meets a murderer?
Well, then I'm coming
off the hook for the rent.
Have a little faith, girls.
[Edith and Gigi laugh]
[all] Cheers.
This is great.
I'm so glad we're doing this.
I'm so glad you said yes
to this.
Me too.
Have you been here before?
I've never been
here before, have you?
I have, it's really,
the bruschetta, actually.
That's amazing,
we should get that.
-Yeah?
-Yeah, yeah.
I always say
if I could suffocate on that,
it would be
a very painless death.
[chuckles]
-That was a joke.
-No, I know, you're very funny.
-Oh, okay.
-[Curt chuckles]
-Thank you.
-Yeah, let's just, uh.
See what we're working...
-Ooh. Oh my God.
-Okay.
Uh, bruschetta, right?
Bruschetta, yeah.
Or "broo-sketta."
-Yeah.
-What?
-Nothing.
-Oh, okay.
-You look beautiful.
-Should we-- Thank you.
Should we do the bruschetta
and then--
I just wanna like, I just
wanna look at you for a second.
Okay.
I'm sorry, are you cool
if we go Dutch?
Dutch, as
in the pancakes or split?
Split it.
-Just 'cause I...
-Right.
Is that bad?
-Is that, that's bad,
-No.
-That's bad, I'm sorry.
-Mm-mm, mm-mm.
It's just the apps
are, like, 12 bucks.
And I didn't even look
at the entrees yet.
-And, uh...
-Yeah, let's split it.
-Would you like another?
-Yes, please.
Just give that to me.
Thank you so much.
Are you gonna drink like that?
We should get a bottle
if that's the case.
-I'd love a bottle.
-Cheaper.
You know what else I'd love?
Let's take a photo.
[chuckles]
Oh?
Yeah, great.
That's amazing.
Stirred, not shaken.
-[phone chimes]
-Why was I shaken, just...
Well, bless your heart, honey.
[phone slams]
That's not gonna do.
-What happened?
-Refill?
Oh, yes.
You know,
Italian food's the best.
It sure is.
Do you know what
else is the best?
Wine. [laughs]
It pairs great with more wine.
You're back?
I am back, yes.
Oh...
Thank you.
Hoo.
Okay, so, how do you know Ben?
Well, we were actually
roommates for a while.
And then he wanted to get a dog.
I love dogs.
And I'm just not
an animal person.
Oh, yeah, right.
Allergies, yeah.
You know, I get allergies too.
Yeah, I'm not allergic,
I don't like animals.
You don't like any animals?
Are you a psychopath
or something?
[laughs]
I'm working on my business,
that's my focus.
Your business--
what is your business?
It's actually
edible arrangements,
but it's got a twist.
Okay, so,
a twist with fruit or...?
No, they have that, it's
various assortments of potatoes.
-Wow.
-Right?
It just hit me.
Yeah.
-Of course.
-They have the fruit.
Yeah, they have that.
-Right.
-Not the potatoes.
-No.
-No. Could we take a photo?
-I guess.
-Mm-hmm.
That's great.
That's all I need.
Can I take another?
-You...
-I think I messed it up.
No, you, okay,
I don't really care.
Just say tater tot on three.
[together] Tater tot.
[upbeat music]
[munches and slurps]
And this is Lyle
during Halloween.
He's a little dragon.
I love it he's gonna
keep me safe forever.
First birthday,
had a seven-layer dip.
Finished it like that.
-Wow.
-Okay, he's a unicorn.
-Yes.
-He identifies as a unicorn.
And you can't call
him anything else
-'cause he doesn't like that.
-Got it.
It's Lyle,
look at that tongue.
And then, St. Patty's,
we were just knocking
them back like that.
Like, he couldn't hold
his liquor, though.
He threw up a little bit.
This is Valentine's Day.
It's my sexy little beast.
I'm surrounded
by pussy, you know.
-Get it?
-Oh, I get it, get it.
Cats, pussy, surrounded?
Oh, Count Catula?
Get it?
-[Leah hisses]
-Because he's...
-Yes, [hisses]
-[Leah chuckles]
He's beautiful.
[Man] Then there's
my bro Jonathan.
He thought it'd be a good
idea to have a meeting
that could have
just been an email,
just to distract Timothy from
making his second-quarter quota.
You know what second
quarter is, right?
[upbeat music]
[Leah sighs]
I've gotta go.
I'm so tired, I'm so tired
So tired of trying
No, you need
to listen to me, okay?
Here's my problem.
I feel like everybody...
-What?
-Okay.
[laughter]
Cheers.
Cheers.
Wow, that's fast.
You know, you remind
me of my ex-wife,
except she had, you know,
smaller boobies.
So, what made you
swipe right, huh?
I just felt like
your personality
is gonna be great.
Oh, boy.
[both laugh]
Can I get another one, please?
I have to go.
-You used to make me shine
-[camera shutter snaps]
You know my vibrator
overheated last night.
I had to stick it in the fridge.
Wait, are we allowed
to be using those?
-I am.
-Shit.
You know, you should
just take 20 pictures
with some random guys here
and send them to Geege.
No, mm-mm, mm-mm, no.
I might be horny but I do
not, I do not play dirty.
-[Bianca sighs]
-Okay.
Date number 20,
what's his name?
[both laugh]
-Who cares, doesn't matter.
-I don't care.
-Doesn't matter.
-I don't care.
[sighs]
Do you wanna climb tonight?
You can take out all this
frustration on your forearms.
Yeah.
-Okay.
-Yeah.
Listen, it kind of feels
like leaved being tied up.
Oh God.
-Okay, we have a meeting.
-That needs to stop, okay.
-All right.
-Love you, bye.
[low-key music]
-[all cheer]
-Oh.
[traffic rushes]
Hey, so sorry I'm late.
How'd you know I'm your date?
Funny thing happened,
I walked in, and the waiter
pointed right at you.
Do I know you from somewhere?
No.
-Are you sure?
-Positive.
-Huh.
-Weird.
-I think I do.
-You don't.
-Leah.
-Steven.
Oh, but you two definitely
know each other.
Yeah, no, we go way back.
About 20 dates.
[clears throat]
-Starters?
-That would be great.
Could we
please get the "broo-sketta"?
Yes.
You've been here before?
Yes, it's very good.
And the little numbers
on the side of the dishes,
they don't,
they don't scare you?
The prices?
No, prices don't scare me.
What about clowns?
They're only allowed
in the bedroom.
[Leah chuckles]
[Mason] There she is.
Aw, I didn't know
you could smile.
Wine, please, Steven.
-Got it.
-Thank you, Steven.
Yes.
So, what's wrong with you?
You go on dates with men
just to figure
out what's wrong with them?
No.
That sounded like a yes.
Well, it came out as a no.
Who hurt you as a child?
God, physically
or emotionally?
Pick one.
Hands down, Veronica Summers.
Well, screw Veronica Summers.
-Yes.
-Right?
Finally, somebody
agrees with me.
Totally, yes.
-She's the worst.
-The worst.
-You hate her?
-Yeah, already.
-Okay, that's good.
-Yeah.
What do you do?
Um...
I own a marketing company.
We specialize
in 3D animation models.
So, that's your thing?
My thing?
Yeah, you know,
your passion, your... thing.
No, no, I wouldn't
say it's my passion.
It's just what I do.
So, you don't
have a thing either?
I've got lots of things.
It's just marketing
is not one of them.
Cool.
So, what about family?
What about them?
First date question,
I don't know.
Okay, weird.
My mom's a workaholic.
I see her sometimes.
Not really,
I don't see her at all.
My Dad moved to
Florida years ago,
with his, like, third wife.
And it's pretty much just me
and my grandma here, Gigi.
Gigi?
Gigi.
Do you have any friends?
Excuse me?
I just...
Sorry, you just
seem kind of lonely.
Lonely? Wow.
Okay, says the single
28-year-old man.
What does my age have
to do with anything?
No, no, nothing, nothing.
Just that most men
your age are taken by now.
They're not going
on blind dating apps
and stockpiling condoms.
Baby Free Girl.
Oh my God,
you're Baby Free Girl.
Okay, you can piss off now!
-Wow, aren't you a peach.
-I am.
[Mason] That's very nice.
-[Leah] You're very nice.
-Are we ready?
No, no, Steven,
I'm sorry, we're not ready.
-Well, dessert?
-No, Steven.
Um, I think I hit a nerve.
-You think?
-Yeah, I do.
So, I'm gonna get out of here.
Got an early workday anyway.
'Cause he has a thing.
Enjoy the "broo-sketta,"
and I hope you find
your thing one day.
-Thank you.
-Have a good night.
Geez, I mean, what a dick.
Did you hear what he said?
Bruschetta, "broo-sketta."
[Imitating]
"Broo-sketta."
-Love?
-Yeah.
What are you getting
out of all this?
Is free rent
a good enough answer?
In this economy,
my inclination is yes.
[Leah chuckles]
What are you really
getting out of it?
Steven, do you have a thing?
Last time I checked, yes.
But it doesn't swing
in your direction.
Shame, but not what I meant.
Listen, everybody has a thing.
[Leah sighs]
[Leah sighs]
[line rings]
Hey, date 20 was a bust.
Where are you?
[Man] Coming up at Jawbone,
we have some new faces,
along with folks
we know and love.
-What's up, bro?
-Dude, thought you had a date.
I did, she was a trip.
Do not ask.
I need a drink.
Yeah, hey, can we
get two drinks, please?
[man chatters indistinctly]
-Hey.
-Hey.
-That's for you.
-Ooh, love you.
Thank you.
Thank you, thank you,
thank you.
Those are for you.
All right, I gotta catch up.
-You know I'm gonna ask.
-Mm-mm.
It was so bad, don't ask.
Okay, what are we doing here?
Okay, well, you
followed me here.
Right.
I'm here supporting
Ben Number 2's poetry project.
[Man] Oh, and Ben
is gonna be with us tonight.
-Oh my God, is that him?
-Yeah.
-[Man] Stick around.
-Hi, Ben.
Hi.
So, what's the event tonight?
Um, my coworker said
that it's open mic.
A scattered wind
drifts across.
Autumn prepped to sing her song.
Such a strong song.
Have you heard this stuff
before, or first time?
-First time.
-Right. Got it.
[Ben] ...for Eve's bite.
She takes a bite.
Haummm...!
Juicy.
-[Ben] Eve is just as juicy...
-Mm-mm.
Yeah, I thought he
meant, um,
stand-up.
-Mm-mm.
[Ben] Adam's got beef.
-Shh.
-[Ben]God's got beef.
-You can't laugh.
-Sorry.
-[Ben] 'Cause you're in trouble.
I thought it was
supposed to be funny.
[indistinct crosstalk]
The girls are mad.
The boys are mad.
God, wow, it's terrible.
[Ben] And it's Eve's fault
that we learned to sew.
-[Ben] Now, it's winter.
-Oh my God.
-She's here.
-Oh my God.
-What?
-The guy from my date.
-The guy.
-[Ben] Thanks for nothing, Eve.
Don't look.
We're not looking.
-Who's here?
-My date is here.
-How is that possible?
-Where?
She's right down the bar.
That's insane.
Bro, she's hot.
Doesn't matter, she's crazy.
-Was it really that bad?
-Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, yeah.
-It was bad. A douche.
-Ugh.
-Okay.
-What's happening?
Okay, I'm gonna go over there.
-Oh.
-Yeah.
I don't think
that's a good idea.
No, I'm gonna go over there.
Don't worry, watch this.
Oh, she's coming.
Ah, crap.
-Hey.
-Hi.
Is this your bedtime routine?
Bad poetry and bar nuts?
How did you find me?
Oh, please, I didn't find you.
Don't flatter yourself.
Do you have a vendetta
against happiness?
No, actually, I love happiness.
I breathe happiness.
[Mason]
Careful, bro, this one bites.
-Hi.
-Hello.
You know who you remind me of?
You remind me of the kind of guy
that small little kids run from,
-screaming.
-No, no, no, no, no.
See, they run to me
because you stole their candy
-and made them cry.
-Funny.
By the way, you have some
self-tanner left on your hands.
I don't use self-tanner.
Then why did you just look?
-You're childish.
-You're childish.
-Oh my God.
-Oh my God.
Oh my God. [laughs]
Hi, hello, would you like
an autograph or something?
Um... I'm Matt.
Mm. And I'm mad.
-Okay.
-Okay.
You've got your
hands full, buddy.
That right there is why I left.
Oh my God,
don't even listen to him.
I just wanna hang
out with my friend.
Yeah, okay, so, do I.
See-- see her over there?
Yeah, hi.
That's my bestie.
Oh, so you do have friends?
Yeah, I have plenty of friends,
and I actually don't
really know why you care.
Hundreds, thousands, could
fit them all in a yearbook.
I bet two people
signed your yearbook:
one of them was your mom,
and one of them was your
school guidance counselor.
What is wrong with you?
I don't know,
plenty, apparently.
-Bye, Matt.
-Bye.
That went well.
Unbelievable.
I like her.
So, number 20
was that bad, huh?
Mm-hmm,
I owe that guy a new shirt.
Mm.
You got 21 lined up?
Uh-huh, I'm cleansing
so I'm ready, you know?
Mm.
What about you?
You have any hot
dates coming up?
As a matter of fact, I do.
His name is Frank,
and I met him at swim class.
Okay, Frank, tell me more.
Well, he's deaf in one eye
and blind in the other.
But other than that,
he's fit as a fiddle.
Okay, changing my mind
about Frank.
he sounds like a stray cat.
[Gigi laughs]
-Where are you going?
-Well, I have to meet B.
Oh, how is the fire queen?
Okay, can you stop that.
I'm just saying,
y'all out there on the porch
smoking a joint
and almost burnt it down.
I know, and I've
apologized many times.
-Just saying.
-It was the joint. It wasn't me.
Okay, where are you going?
-Silks class.
-Oh, oh!
Oh, that curtainy thing?
Yeah, yeah,
you flip and stuff.
No kidding, can you flip?
No, no, I can't flip.
I'm just trying to get
my feet off the mat.
That's, like, hard,
but I'm doing it, you know?
It's a thing,
and it's good, and I like it.
-Well, it's a goal.
-It's a goal, it's a thing.
-Flipping.
-Flipping.
[Gigi laughs]
I'm getting more flexible.
-Yeah, look at you.
-Ow.
-I'm really sore.
-God, you need help.
-Okay, I love you.
-Bye, honey.
I'll see you.
Leah, remember,
grip, step, step.
Like an inchworm
ascending her destiny.
Right.
Hey, Leah, maybe you'll
find love at the top.
[Leah laughs]
Okay, I got this.
Veronica Summers
can suck my dick.
[upbeat vocal music plays]
It's okay.
[Leah shrieks]
[Leah laughs]
[Bianca] Keep going,
keep going.
Fudge it, oh shit.
Oh, oh, oh.
[body thuds]
-Ow.
-Are you okay?
Yeah, she's fine here.
Hey, Leah, wanna
go to drag brunch?
Mimosas?
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
I don't like being
fed like a baby.
Okay, no.
That's okay.
-But my mother likes it.
-Good for her.
Oh, oh.
Oh God, oh.
Oh, okay, okay.
Okay.
That was weird.
So, that's unfortunate.
Okay.
Oh, oh, I don't...
Holy shit!
-Oh.
-Oh.
-Sorry, I'm so sorry.
-I'm so...
-[Mason chuckles] Great.
-You again.
Wow, I'm really happy to see you
getting the help that you need.
Are you lost? The children's
section's that way.
Very funny.
You know I actually had to
get that shirt dry cleaned,
so that'll be 40 bucks if
you wanted to make it up to me.
I will, when you apologize.
Me apologize?
No, no, no, no.
It wasn't me that was making
us both miserable that night.
Look, Mason, I...
[beat-driven music]
[whistle blows]
[bonk]
Veronica Summers.
Is that like your alter ego?
No, it's mine.
Leah Jones,
as I live and breathe.
[unamused chuckle]
And look,
you finally filled out
your training bra. Cute.
-Thank you.
-Oh, Ronnie, Ronnie...
Veronica Summers?
In another life.
When Leah and I went
to high school together.
Oh.
Oh, sure.
Well, at least it's not
those weird comic books
you read backwards.
It's manga. You're--
you're referring to manga,
but... you knew that.
Hey, I like manga.
You know, Leah used to get
in trouble all the time
for drawing her goofy
little characters
instead of paying
attention in class.
Well, I mean--
You know.
You totally broke
the stereotypes.
Because most nerds,
they make good grades.
Except my brother always said
he always used to see you
in summer school.
Yeah, well, you know,
your brother and I
had a lot in common, Ronnie.
-Did you?
-Mm-hmm.
See, I don't recall my
brother catching our daddy
in bed with his secretary.
-Whoa.
-Oh, wow.
-Okay.
-That's a bit much.
Oh, I'm just playing.
She and I banter like this
all the time, don't we?
Yeah, yes, I've missed it.
Don't worry.
By the way, you two
make a perfect couple,
so just best of luck.
Yes, and namaste.
-Oh.
-[books thud]
They should move that.
-She's so cute, isn't she?
-[footsteps recede]
Hm.
I thought Veronica Summers
moved to like
Australia or something?
Oh, yeah, well, she
moved back, apparently.
-Ugh.
-Yeah, I know.
Well, as much as I love
to trash Veronica Summers...
Me too.
...I sort of came here
for some trash reality TV.
Whoa.
-Okay, blast from the past.
-I know.
-What is this?
-I'm on one today.
-[Leah chuckles]
-Ohh.
Wow.
I don't know why
you ever stopped.
These are good.
I don't know, I think it was
after my mom left, you know?
I just sort of started
freezing in class.
I hate she did that to you.
I hate it too.
[soft melancholic music]
-Leah...
-I know.
You don't have to say it.
It's not high school anymore.
Yeah.
I need a really good
dress for tonight.
-Yeah?
-Yeah.
Like a really good one.
That's my girl.
I'm thinking like
a little side boob.
-I love side boobs.
-Not too much.
-Just a little...
-A tasteful side boob.
-Tasteful side boob.
-Yeah.
-Classy, slutty side boob.
-Hot.
Thank you.
-Hey.
-Yes.
This is good.
Thank you.
-Lucky number 26?
-[Leah chuckles]
You've been
counting too. [laughs]
She's an artist, I see.
She is a doodler.
When I was a kid, I used
to steal my sister's crop tops
and sing show tunes
in the basement.
And when my dad caught
me, you know what he did?
He bought me a pink
karaoke machine for Christmas,
complete
with a rhinestone microphone.
Hell yeah.
He never missed one recital.
It's okay
to let people know you.
[upbeat dramatic music]
Holy shit.
Girl, even my panties
are in a bind right now.
-Goodbye.
-Welcome!
Hi, I'm Jackson,
Frank's grandson.
Leah, Gigi's granddaughter.
Can we have two glasses
of Veuve to start.
Hope that's okay.
I like to kick dinner off
with a little champagne.
Oh, no, that's more than okay.
I actually happen
to be a huge advocate
for alcoholic appetizers, so.
Oh, I can already tell
you're a load of fun.
Mm.
Oh, you have no idea.
Let's hope you can keep up.
Oh, challenge accepted.
Okay.
Where have you been
all this time, Leah?
I think the question is more...
where have you
been all this time?
Let's get some
oysters goin', huh?
Absolutely.
[upbeat dramatic
music continues]
Welcome to Bing Bop Toys.
Home of the talking teddy
bears, how may I help...
[sighs] You.
Hi.
I'm here to see Bailey Wakemore.
Who I just realized
is your boss.
Yeah?
Yeah, wow.
Why are you here?
I'm just pitching
a few ideas for our subsidiary.
Hm.
Nice tie.
-Thank you.
-Yeah.
You can have a sit,
uh, in that one.
Over there, not that one,
the one that's farthest from me.
-Oh, the furthest one, right.
-Yeah.
Bailey know that
you are so hospitable?
Look, all complaints
are actually dropped
in the empty tampon box, which
is right by the water fountain.
If you need an extra pen,
let me know.
Nice.
-Might take you up on that.
-Perfect.
-Psst.
-Oh God.
Psst?
Psst?
-Leah?
-Yeah.
Oh, you did hear, okay. Um.
I just wanted to say, the,
that thing Ronnie said to you,
at the bookstore the other day.
That was not cool.
In fact, beyond not cool.
It was extremely mean.
So, I'm sorry that
she said that to you.
I appreciate that. Thanks.
Yeah.
I didn't. Haven't
thought about it since.
-But thank you.
-Yeah.
[Bianca]
You can send him
to the conference
room now, Leah.
Well, well, that is your cue.
That's my cue.
Wait.
What?
Oh, God, okay.
Take off your tie.
-What?
-Your tie, take it off.
Uh, why?
Because.
Because Bailey hates ties.
Like, hates ties.
This isn't a prank?
Her dad was a funeral director,
so ties make her think
about dead bodies.
-Dead bodies?
-So, you--
That is so dark.
I know, well, look,
I didn't choose her childhood.
Wow, okay.
-That's her life, so.
-Feels like a prank, but okay.
-It's not a prank.
-I'll go with it, yeah.
You want the job,
or you don't want the job.
-Sure.
-Okay, that's good.
-Choosing to trust you.
-Yeah.
All right. Better?
Oh, no, oh God, okay.
Oh, thank you.
-Appreciate that.
-Why would you button this too?
-Can you breathe in them?
-Not while you're choking me.
-Okay.
-Thank you.
[Leah sighs]
-It's like you can breathe now.
-Yeah.
Better?
No, yeah, no,
it's better, it's good.
You look good, you look worthy.
Worthy?
Worthy for the job.
Why are you suddenly
being so nice to me?
You know, who knows?
Mercury just fell
out of retrograde.
-Really?
-It came back.
The Saturn returned,
I don't know. Go.
-Thank you.
-Yeah.
[soft guitar music]
[door opens]
-[keyboard clacking]
-[Leah sighs]
-Hey.
-Hey.
Celebratory drink?
You sold the design?
I did.
What? Wait.
Wait, that means
I sold the design.
How did you possibly
sell the design?
Because if you had
worn the tie, then you--
Oh, then I would have
looked like a dead body.
-Yes.
-Gotcha, yeah.
-Oh, this is really exciting.
-This is great for us.
We should go
get a celebratory drink.
What? Oh.
Yeah, no, I'm okay, thank you.
I don't really feel like being
run over by your girlfriend.
-Girlfriend?
-Yeah, Veronica.
Uh, no, she's old colleague.
I was getting a second opinion
over coffee, that's all.
Oh, yeah.
She looked
a little hot for a coffee.
Trust me, not a date.
Did she know that?
I would say that her wife
was plenty aware of it.
Yeah.
Plot twist
Wait, so, do you
think she was mean to me
because she thought
I was pretty?
Definitely.
Holy shit.
-Yeah.
-That changes everything.
It's wild, huh?
-Yeah.
-Yeah, mind blown.
-So, a drink?
-Oh.
-Not a date.
-Not a date, just a whiskey.
Okay, good, yeah,
'cause I can't,
I can't go on another
date with you.
That's fine,
I can't date you either.
-What?
-What?
Boheme at 5:15.
See you there.
[phone taps, phone chimes]
[phone dings]
-[phone chimes]
-[Bianca chuckles]
[phone chimes]
[phone chimes]
[phone chimes]
[soft guitar music]
So, why can't you go on
another date with me?
If we wanna call it that.
Mm.
Come on, tell me.
Come on.
Okay, okay, screw it.
My grandmother, Gigi,
made a bet, if you will.
She bet me
a large amount of money
that I could find love
in 40 consecutive dates.
-No way.
-Mm-hmm.
I'm one of your 40 dates!
Ha! Yeah. I mean,
if you wanna call it that.
I do wanna call it that.
Wow.
What number was I?
-20? What are we on?
-Damn!
-Mm-hmm.
Whoa. Are you sleeping
with any of these guys?
Wow, that is none
of your business.
Valid, sorry about that.
[glasses tapping]
Another round?
Um... yes, but...
Hm. 27's waiting.
-Shame.
-Yeah.
Before you go, open that up.
Why?
Humor me.
I case you need
an emergency call
in any of your terrible dates.
Feel free to hit me up.
I took drama in high school,
so my fake crying
is actually pretty on point.
Oh. But boys don't cry.
Oh, they do, it's
just, it's in the shower
where no one can see it.
Got it. How much?
No, no, no, don't worry
about it, I got this.
-You sure?
-Yeah.
-Not a date.
-Not a date.
-Not a date.
-Not a date.
-Okay.
-[Mason laughs]
[footsteps tapping]
Oh, shit.
Ah, yes, thank you.
Aw.
27 is in good hands.
-[Mason laughs]
-[footsteps tapping]
[soft beat music]
How was lucky 27?
Oh, he was lucky all right.
[Mason] Oh, he was lucky?
Yeah, he was,
he was a photographer.
Mm-hmm.
Photographer.
-Question for you, though.
-Yeah.
Would you take photos
of used underwear?
Absolutely I would.
And I'll tell you all
about it over lunch.
Oh, yay.
Did you draw that?
No, no, Mason, no.
The little office elves
that run around here, they
actually broke in last night,
they drew this.
Leah, that's really good.
Okay, thank you.
Lunch?
As in a date?
Aww. That's cute.
It was a good try.
So, pictures of underwear,
like Fruit of the Loom?
Yeah, like who's even
into that, you know?
-No idea.
-I wear the cute kind.
Lots of cheek, lots of lace.
Leah Jones?
-Jackson, hi!
-Hey.
Oh my God.
God, you look amazing.
Oh, no, I mean,
I just, like, threw this on, so.
What's up, I'm Mason.
Oh, hey, yeah, Jackson.
Look, I had a really
amazing time the other night.
I'm sorry I haven't texted.
I've just been
slammed volunteering
with Frank's underprivileged
children's reading program
and teaching night
courses for first gen
non-English speakers
with disabilities.
Oh, yeah, no, I mean,
I, like, love languages, so.
Let's get together soon.
Sounds amazing.
-Amazing.
-Amazing.
-I'll text you.
-Okay.
Big dog.
Ohh.
Did you know that
you have two voices?
Huh?
You have two voices--
normal voice, secretary voice.
You totally just used
your secretary voice on him.
I did not.
-You 100% did.
-No, I didn't.
-Yeah, you did.
-Whatever.
-Besides, you can't date him.
-And why not?
-He's not your guy.
-Who says?
Let's just say that
your chemistry is amazing.
Shut up.
-Amazing.
-Stop.
He makes me flustered.
He gives me butterflies.
He does.
-Just saying.
-Come on.
How many people
have you been in love with?
-It's been a few.
-Great.
And?
It didn't work out, obviously.
-Obviously.
-Yeah.
-Look at you.
-[Mason laughs]
It just wasn't right.
What?
What?
No.
-What?
-No.
You were about to give me the
whole "she wasn't the one" talk.
-No, no, no, no, no.
-Yes.
See, I don't believe
in the one.
I believe that love is part
nature and part decision.
And it doesn't happen overnight.
It happens over
long stretches of time.
Thank you.
God, I could kiss you right now.
No one ever agrees with me.
Oh, shoot, I gotta go,
lunch is up.
All right, yeah.
Um...
Do I, like, really
have a secretary voice?
Yeah, you sure do,
and it doesn't fit you.
It's entirely too pleasant.
-God.
-[both laugh]
What up, bitch, I got fries.
[Bianca sniffles]
Oh, wow, what's...
Okay.
I'm getting fired.
What?
Yeah, no,
I'm getting fired today.
No, no, no, no.
Whose laptop is that?
Bailey's.
That's fine.
It's not fine.
Because I had all of the new
Bing Bop designs on there.
-Right.
-And I didn't,
I didn't back it up.
-Okay.
And, so, now,
they're gonna be gone.
-And we present on Monday.
-Oh.
-So.
-Monday?
-It's just like...
-Yeah.
Well, that's--
it's not Monday yet.
Okay, well, here's no, no,
no, no, here's the good
news, you want the good news?
I'm gonna fix it.
I'm gonna fix it.
-No, you're not.
-Yes, I am.
-No, you're not.
-I remember
what they look like
really good, by the way.
Really cute.
I can do it, this is easy.
I could--
Let me do this for you.
You don't remember
what they look like.
Yeah.
Come on, when have
I ever lied to you?
You lie to me, like,
all the time. [sobbing]
What?
Oh, not on the fries,
it's so bad for your skin.
[Bianca sobbing]
Hey, hey,
look at me, look at me.
[hand slaps]
You need to pull
yourself together.
[hand slaps]
Okay?
-Okay.
-Okay.
-Okay. That was crazy.
-Yeah, that was wild.
That was crazy. Thank you.
I'm gonna fix it, though.
I'm sorry for lying in the past.
It's okay.
[soft piano music]
[keyboard clacking]
[upbeat piano music]
B?
Is that right?
Yeah.
Yeah, it looks great.
-Yeah?
-Yeah.
-Okay, you're a lifesaver.
-You're good,
you can breathe now.
[soft piano music ends]
Ah, crap!
[phone dings, phone chimes]
[phone chimes]
[Leah chuckles]
Mason's coming over.
You owe that guy a shirt.
[Mason knocks]
[door opens]
Thank you, you're my hero.
You are welcome.
-Hi, Bianca, good to see you.
-Hi.
So, what, no date tonight?
No, already handled.
-[rackets tapping]
-[man groans and grunts]
-[racket tapping]
-[man grunts]
[man screams]
-Yikes.
-Yeah, he was a real keeper.
Oof, that's a lot.
Yeah, what are you doing,
where are you going?
I have to finish this proposal.
We were gonna watch a movie.
And I have errands to run.
-So, you're in charge.
-Nice.
Before you go, I emailed
you some ideas that I had
when I was working on
the other Bing Bops.
So, I was just wondering
if you could, like--
Okay.
I can show Bailey tomorrow.
-Thank you.
-Mm-hmm.
Okay.
-You two have fun.
-[Mason chuckles]
-Don't die.
-[Mason chuckles]
Love you so much.
-Love you, bye.
-It's good to see you.
[door closes]
What was that all about?
-It is Ouija board time.
-No, it's not.
-Yes, it is.
-No, it's not.
-No.
-Stay at my house...
I make the rules.
-I was put in charge.
-So...
No, you weren't.
[soft ethereal music]
[Leah sighs]
Yep.
-That's a lot to take in.
-Mm-hmm.
[soft ethereal music continues]
[Mason] That's an odd visual.
-Are we done?
-Nope, can't stop staring.
Okay.
Ah, there's my little spy.
I need a full report.
[Bianca sighs]
Well, there is a boy.
Oh.
I think it could
really be something.
So, there's reason for hope?
She seems... different.
Well, I'm optimistic.
How are you doing?
Me?
No, the other best friend.
Yes, you.
I'm fine.
You two are like
peas in a pod.
[Bianca laughs]
How about dinner?
I just happen to have
lasagna in the oven,
and I can't eat it by myself.
Yeah, yeah, I could eat.
Yeah.
[Angus]
Oh, Honeysuckle!
I could never live
another day without you!
Every second of
every minute of every day,
I think of
your rose petal lips.
[Honeysuckle] Oh, Angus,
how you've swept me off my feet
like a one-bedroom farmhouse
in a Kansas tornado!
-[Honeysuckle] Kiss me!
-So stupid.
Stupid? Are you mocking
their love?
-Absolutely.
-Why?
Because.
Come on, stuff like that
doesn't happen in real life.
Yes, it does.
Wait, wait, wait, are you saying
that with all these guys,
you've... what, you haven't got,
like, a text back?
Oh, no,
I've received texts back.
-You've gotten texts?
-Plenty of texts.
We both know
why I am dating so hard.
-So.
-Thank you.
Pass it on to you.
Why are you?
I'm really not.
-Oh, come on.
-I'm not.
Mr. Midday Condom Retrieval.
No, no, no, no, no, see,
those were not for me.
Those were for my buddy, Matt.
Matt?
Matt's real,
you met him at the bar.
Matt's not old enough
to buy his own condoms?
[sighs]
They were a gag gift.
It's for his birthday.
But I think your ex needed one.
Oh, no.
No, no, my ex had,
he had plenty.
He actually kept them,
he kept them in a fishbowl
of sorts by his bed.
This is a true story,
I'm not messing with you.
This is terrible.
-I know.
-That's terrible.
-Yeah, it's embarrassing.
-Oh, wow.
Wow, he sounds great.
Real genius, that one.
Yeah, yeah, your ex was--
she was a brain surgeon?
[Mason laughs]
No.
And?
Just... just happened.
Oh, no, come on,
there's always a moment.
What was it?
-Okay, funny story.
-Oh.
I came home from work one day,
and she'd moved
everything around.
In the kitchen,
the pots, the pans,
plates, silverware, everything.
It was just like, I couldn't
find any of my stuff.
No.
The plates were,
like, on the top shelf.
Totally out of reach.
And it didn't bother me at
the time, it really didn't.
But right after that,
we had started
just having, like,
problem after problem.
I just, I don't know, I just,
it's the beginning of the end.
Anyway, like, three weeks later,
she was gone, we had broken up.
And I put everything
back the way that it was,
the way it was supposed to be.
Of course.
I guess, my question
that I'm still kinda like
playing with my head is what,
like if she needed
like a change,
why didn't she just talk
to me about it, you know?
-Why not just ask me?
-Yeah.
You wanna know something
a little shitty, though?
I love shitty.
-Oh, you're in luck.
-Okay, hit me.
I...
[chuckles]
It only took me
about three weeks...
to forget that she had
ever lived with me.
-Oh, God.
-God.
-That's really bad.
-Terrible.
It's even worse
when I said it out loud.
But she rearranged
the pots, so.
-She was asking for it.
-She did?
-She did.
-She was asking for it.
-Yeah, she did do that.
-Yeah.
You gotta tell me something.
-What?
-Tell me something...
-Tell me something real.
-Okay, okay, okay.
-Okay.
-Come on.
For me, I just feel like
it's been a series of people
letting me down.
Not just guys,
like, my mom and my dad
and just people in general.
Yeah.
And so, I feel like
I sort of just...
retreated.
Yeah.
But the last few weeks,
although insane,
I feel like I've
caught my breath again.
Or at least I'm...
[exhales deeply]
...breathing again.
Well, that's good.
-It's good to breathe.
-You have to breathe.
I do.
I mean, I'd die without it, so.
Yes, you would.
[soft pensive music]
I don't know if that just
made any sense. [laughs]
Totally does.
I don't know, I, okay.
I guess what I'm trying
to say...
is I get it.
You know, in terms of us...
putting ourselves
back out there.
Thanks for the ear.
Any time.
[birds chirping]
[soft piano music]
Whatcha doing?
-Don't move.
-Okay.
Okay, if you move,
then I can't play my game.
Okay.
[Leah] How'd you sleep?
I slept really, really good.
Good.
Do not move.
Okay.
I'm gonna be so...
-[Leah laughs]
-[blocks clattering]
I'm so sorry.
-That was so close.
-I got so excited.
[both laugh]
Do you need coffee?
I would love some coffee.
Okay.
-Get up, then.
-Okay. [grunts]
Let me run to the bathroom.
Toothbrushes are
under the sink.
-Is that a hint?
-Yeah, you're disgusting.
[Mason laughs]
[hand taps]
A fruit so forbidden
A mask to be hidden
But we share the moon
As if we were free
Well, if I knew then
What I know now
These shackles here
Would be unbound
'Cause
[Mason] Any, uh,
big plans for the day?
-Here's your coffee.
-Oh, thank you.
Uh, yeah, actually,
I am gonna over to Gigi's.
Mm.
Gigi, yeah.
-Do you want cream cheese?
-Cream cheese would be great.
-Am I in the way?
-Mm-hmm.
Um... I'll take you.
No, you're fine, it's like
all the way across town.
I'm just gonna Uber.
-Are you sure?
-Yeah.
-No, it's fine, I can take you.
-You don't have to take me.
You don't have a car?
I-I do have a car.
Where's your car?
Um, it's in the shop.
-In the shop?
-Yeah.
What happened to your car?
Um...
-Mm, that's good.
-I know.
-There was a squirrel.
-There was a squirrel?
So, I swerved.
-Oh, no.
-Don't judge me.
I'm not judging you,
I'm waiting for you to share.
And then I hit a lamp,
but it's fine.
It's a squirrel, lamp, cool.
All righty, well, I'll take you.
Okay.
You'll like her.
-I'm excited to meet her.
-She's kind of crazy.
-Who's not?
-That's true.
-Hey, I got that.
-What?
-Yeah.
-I'm strong.
No, it's nothing, really.
-Okay.
-No problem.
-Thank you.
-Yeah.
-It's beautiful.
-I know.
I don't know
why I can't move in.
Oh, good, I just made cookies!
Oh, since when do you bake?
Since you've been
a very good girl.
So, last week?
Around then.
Who is this?
Mason Davis, ma'am.
Date number 20.
Oh, oh, so, you know
about our little agreement?
I do,
and I find it very refreshing.
Well, that means you have
a good sense of humor. [laughs]
Okay, this is nice.
Mason, thank you.
You can leave now,
you don't have to stay.
-That's okay.
-Actually,
it would be great if he could.
I have a very long
list of to-dos,
and I could use a little muscle.
She's joking.
You're joking.
-I'm not.
-Just tell me what to do, Gigi.
I would love to
tell you what to do.
This one's helpful,
but she's a little slow.
-Slow?
-I'm not slow.
-You coming?
-Yeah, I'm coming.
[hammer taps]
How's that, right there?
Yeah, um...
No, that's crooked.
It's not crooked,
it's perfect.
No, it's crooked.
It's not crooked,
you're crooked.
Step back.
Look, just a little bit crooked.
Yeah, you're right,
it's crooked.
[Leah laughs]
What'd you say?
I think I said something along
the lines of you were right,
and it was crooked.
There we go.
How's that?
-It's much better.
-What? I said you were right.
-I know.
-[toolbox clatters]
-[body thuds]
[Leah grunts]
[Mason laughs]
You okay?
-Yeah, are you okay?
-Yeah, I'm good.
I'm so sorry.
That's okay.
[Leah laughs, Leah sighs]
-I did try to get you up.
-Yeah, you did try.
You're clumsy, though.
Oh, I am a bit clumsy.
Mm.
[soft piano music]
Mason, I have more dates.
Yeah, right.
-That's right.
-It's just the dates.
No, it's okay, yeah.
I understand, you gotta
do what you gotta do.
Please, I don't, I don't
want you to be mad, okay?
I'm not, no, I'm not.
I'm not.
I'm really not.
-It's okay.
-Please, I'm...
I'm really just trying to get
through these dates, and, uh,
I'm trying to figure it out.
-I know.
-Trying to commit to it.
Yeah.
It's good. No, you should.
-Right.
-It's okay.
It's okay.
Okay.
I should get going.
-It's all good.
-Okay.
So, you're on the floor
Shook to the core
'Cause I know you care
'Cause I was there
What am I doing?
I saw your eyes
[envelopes rustling]
Hey, it was really great
to meet you, I'm headed out.
Oh, Mason,
before you get away,
I have a little something
for ya.
Oh, um, Gigi, I--
Listen...
Leah's wasted a lot of time
on a lot of jackasses.
And you, my dear,
are not a jackass.
[chuckles]
Thank you. [chuckles]
And thank you for this.
I hope you come.
Hope so too.
[footsteps receding]
[door opens]
A handsome man has just
stepped out the door.
Yeah, yeah, no, I know.
Plenty of fish in the sea,
as mom would say, right?
I thought we weren't
talking about her anymore.
Yeah, but I really don't
wanna be like my mom, Gigi.
I think I might have screwed
up with her a little bit.
I don't know.
Maybe I was too harsh, or...
little of this, little of that.
But you know,
all any of us can do is
just to try as best we can.
[soft melancholic music]
But I think
I got it right with you.
You think?
[Leah sniffles]
Even though I almost burnt
the porch down that one time?
Baby, you could've
burnt the whole house down,
and I'd still love you.
Thank you.
[keyboard clacking]
-Hey.
-Hey.
Hi, sorry, wait.
[Leah clears throat]
I, uh, I got you something.
It's a bomb!
-Whoa.
-Surprise!
-Thank you.
-Yeah.
I also wanted to say that
I am sorry for the other day.
You could have just texted.
Yeah, no, no, I could have,
I could have just texted,
but a bomb is way more fun.
So much more fun.
-Yeah.
-Yeah, entirely.
I'm also really sorry
for not wrapping it.
It is wrapped, it's in a box.
-Sure, yeah.
-It's perfect.
-Okay.
-Thank you.
Well, you should go work.
-Gotta go work.
-Yeah.
-[camera mechanism whirs]
-[soft beat music]
-You got this.
-Grip, step, step.
Grip, step, step.
Grip, step, step.
Grip, step, step.
Yes.
[Leah shrieks]
-Okay, okay.
-Grip, step, step.
Yeah.
-Let's go, let's go, yeah!
-[all applaud]
-[Leah laughs]
-[all cheer and applaud]
[Bianca laughs]
Oh my gosh.
[all cheer and applaud]
Oh, wow, I'm so high.
I'm so high.
-Oh my God!
-Holy shit, how do I get down?
What do I, wait, what do I do?
-Slide down.
-Okay, okay.
Just slide down.
-Okay.
-Yeah.
-Yes.
-Just what?
Fall down?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
No, no, no, hold on, hold on.
-I'm coming down.
-Like a waterfall.
Okay.
-You need to slide.
-Slide, slide down.
-Slide down, okay?
-Okay.
-Yes.
-Okay.
-Okay.
-Yeah.
-Yes.
-You got it.
Yes.
Okay.
[all cheer and applaud]
Oh my God.
Oh, oh.
You don't look so good.
Oh, no. Oh.
Oh God, oh.
I'm totally fine.
No, no, no, no,
she's not, she's not okay.
Oh.
[Leah heaving]
Oh.
I'm not gonna scream.
I'm gonna walk away slowly
and cry in my car.
Okay, okay.
[soft beat music]
[soft melancholic music]
-Hey, Mason.
-Uh, hey, um...
Have you seen Leah?
Oh.
I'm sorry I have
to tell you this.
What happened?
It was a long
night for all of us.
Bianca, please,
just tell me what happened.
She's at Gigi's.
She's at Gigi's?
Yeah, she got some really
gnarly food poisoning.
You made that sound
so much worse than it was.
I know.
-Oh, you did that on purpose?
-Mm-hmm.
-You're funny.
-Yeah.
Wow, you got me. Um...
Why aren't you with her?
Because I don't
do well with vomit.
Okay.
But she's accepting visitors
if you wanna cheer her up.
Good to know.
-Okay, I'll see you later.
-Thank you.
Mm-hmm.
[birds chirping]
[Mason knocks]
[soft percussive music]
Ah, crap! [chuckles]
-Hi, there.
-Hey.
How can I help you?
I heard there's
a sick girl here.
Yeah, yeah, she and Gigi
have seen better days.
My grandpa's here
helping out as well.
Very kind. Um...
If you could just
give this to her.
That'd be great.
It's an inside joke, kind of...
It's really sweet.
Yeah.
And if you could let her know
I came by, that'd be great.
Mason.
-Big dog.
-Yeah, that's me.
-All right.
-Yeah.
-Later.
-Later.
-[percussive music continues]
-[door closes]
[footsteps receding]
Hey, how's the patient?
The patient is dead.
Some guy just
brought this over.
Mark or something.
-Mason?
-Yeah, him.
He a coworker?
Um...
No, no, he's number 20.
-Ow.
-Number what?
[Leah laughs]
Gigi and I made a deal,
that I would go on
40 consecutive dates
and prove to her
that love is a sham.
This was a long time ago?
No, this was like a month ago.
So, I was one of your dates?
Mm-hmm.
You were going out
with 39 other guys?
What?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
It was more like in a row.
-In a row?
-Yeah.
And trust me, it was not
as easy as it sounds.
No, no, no,
it takes a lot of stamina.
Stamina?
What were you doing
with these guys?
Oh God, what weren't we doing?
I mean it was like
nonstop, you know,
it was like all over the city.
This one guy,
he took me to a church.
I-I-I can't hear any more.
What?
No, don't worry,
we didn't make it inside.
You did it outside of a church?
No, I ran away
once he took the blindfold off.
How else am I
supposed to make rent?
You have a very messed-up
relationship with your family.
Okay, I was just having fun.
With 40 other guys?
Geez, ow, yeah, and?
It's been nice knowing you.
[footsteps receding]
[Leah grunts]
-[plastic crunches]
-[Leah heaving]
[soft guitar music]
[line ringing]
Oh God, Leah.
Hey.
Hi.
You feeling better?
No, but I have a question.
-[Mason] Okay.
-Um...
What was in the bag?
Why?
It suffered a casualty.
Would you just tell me?
I'm curious,
but it was just
bath bombs and stuff.
All the girl stuff
the store could offer.
A bomb for a bomb.
Yeah.
It's funny.
I'm glad you
think so, I did too.
Get some rest.
Text me later.
Okay.
Okay.
Bye.
Okay.
Okay, thank you,
I'll be right there.
What's going on, it's good?
Uh...
Bailey wants to see me.
Okay.
-In her office.
-Good.
-Right now.
-Good, yeah, this is good.
-Yeah.
-[both] That is good, right?
-Yeah, I think it's good.
-Yeah, yeah, good news.
Yeah, no, I don't,
I haven't done anything bad.
-You haven't done anything.
-I don't think I have, I mean...
-No.
-No.
-There, no.
-No?
-No, it's fine.
-You're fine.
Yeah, you're fine, no, no, no.
don't get worried about it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't
freak out, don't freak out.
-I don't even know.
-Confidence. Yeah, you're good.
-Okay, stay there.
-Yeah, I'm not going anywhere.
-I'll be right back.
-Good.
-Good vibes, good vibes.
-I'm fine.
Yeah, yeah,
yeah, chill, chill.
[Bianca] I'm easy.
[phone dings]
She loved my designs.
She wants to see
more of my designs.
That's awesome.
Congrats.
-[footsteps receding]
-[soft guitar music]
Congrats, Leah.
Ooh.
[soft guitar music continues]
-[footsteps tapping]
-[indistinct chatter]
Well, what's up?
Look, I wanna give you
a second chance.
A second chance?
You know, I'll admit that
sleeping with 40 other men,
it throws me a little bit.
Jackson?
I've decided to look past that
'cause I see myself
as a very forgiving person.
Jackson, um...
Yeah, not that it's
any of your business,
but I wasn't sleeping
with any of them.
-But you said--
-If you could stop, just stop.
It's not what I said.
It's what you thought of me.
And...
yeah, you don't
really know me.
No, but I want
to get to know you.
You check so many of my boxes.
I'll see you later, Jackson.
So, no?
That's a hell no, baby.
What?
-Oh.
-Oh my God.
-Sorry.
-I'm so sorry.
Oh, hey.
You know, we really
gotta stop doing that.
We're gonna get hurt.
-Yeah, seriously.
[both chuckle]
Did you just crawl out
of the sewer or something?
No, this is-- this is my office.
Yeah, no, that
makes more sense.
-Mason, were things weird--
-Do you remember...
what you said on our first date?
About having a thing?
Oh, yeah, yeah,
yeah, that thing.
Have you found a thing?
I don't think that people
can find a thing in a month.
[chuckles]
So, Jackson is...?
Jackson?
-What?
-No, Mason.
Jackson's not...
in the picture.
-He's not?
-No.
Okay.
Okay.
Um...
Before I met you, I had, like,
a vague idea of what I wanted.
But, Leah, now,
I wake up in the morning,
and you are the first thing
that I think about.
Okay, um...
Mason, we can't.
We can't have this
talk right now.
The dates?
Okay.
I get it.
I get it.
[soft melancholic music]
-[indistinct chatter]
-[footsteps approaching]
He was supposed
to be here at 5:30.
-What time is it now?
-6:00.
Ah.
I think Mama got stood up.
I think you're right.
Tonight was date number 40,
Steven.
Ohh.
You wouldn't wanna?
-To, oh...?
-Yeah.
Well, I have been
waiting for this moment
for the past 39 dates.
-Best date yet.
-[both laugh]
Should we take a picture?
Oh, yes, and I came prepared.
-So, I'm just gonna, yep.
-Oh.
Where has this been?
Special occasions.
-Here we go, ready?
-Of course.
Men of a certain age.
And straight face for grandma.
There we go.
She's gonna want me to date you.
-I'm down.
-What do we do?
-We eat bruschetta.
-[Leah laughs]
And drink copious
amounts of wine.
[Leah laughs]
Deal.
[Host] We'll be right back to
Murders, Murders, Murders.
There she is, my little angel,
home from her 40 dates.
-Hey.
-How you feeling?
A month and a half older.
[Gigi laughs]
Did you cash your check?
No, I lost the bet.
What are you talking about?
You didn't lose the bet.
I didn't find anybody.
I think you might
have lost your mind,
but you didn't lose the bet.
I did, it's okay.
-Leah?
-What?
-Leah?
-What?
Are you blind?
No.
Mason...
-I don't wanna--
-Mason is crazy about you.
Do you not see
how he looks at you?
Do you not know what you look
like when you look at him?
What if you found out that
you could never see him again?
How would you feel then?
He's the keeper, honey.
He's the keeper.
Can I borrow your car?
Mm-hmm.
Sure.
-Okay, okay, okay.
-Yeah, hurry up.
Oh, shoot, I think I might
have forgotten to plug it in.
-What, again?
-I'm old, okay? I forgot.
Just make a run for it.
I love you, thank you.
I love you.
I look fine, right?
Go!
[door closes]
Don't want to have
To say goodbye for the night
This feeling is so heavy
And it takes a bite
At my heart that you're
Holding with your left hand
And I can't understand
If we are breakin' up
We go where no one
Knows where we go
[Leah panting and coughing]
God. [panting]
The anxiety is killin' you
Oh, sorry, sorry,
sorry, excuse me, sorry.
But we can't go deep
Hi, sorry.
In the in-between
We're holding on to
[Leah panting]
Oh God, oh God, oh God, okay.
Okay, I can do this.
[Leah knocks]
Mason?
[Leah knocks]
Come on, I know you're awake.
Please. [panting]
Okay, look, um...
God, if you could,
if you could just please
just let me in, okay?
I would really like to see you.
And talk to you.
And, uh...
I also totally get it
if you don't want that.
And that's so valid. But I...
Are you out of breath?
Yeah.
Why? [chuckles]
I can tell you about it
if you let me in.
[door opens]
Hi.
Hello.
-Come in.
-[footsteps approaching]
Okay, uh...
[panting]
I um, I lied.
I lied the other day,
and I shouldn't have.
I shouldn't have done that,
and I hate that I did.
And I know that I...
that I have screwed up.
A couple of times. Um...
[panting]
Do you have water?
-Water? Yeah, I have water.
-Yeah, yeah.
-That would be great.
-Yeah.
You kind of live far away.
-Here.
-Okay.
-Yeah.
-Mm-hmm. Mm.
-Mm.
-Mm-hmm.
Wow, it's really good.
-Really good, yeah.
-Really good water.
Okay, um.
Okay.
Okay.
Here's the deal. I, uh...
-I really liked our date.
-Yeah, okay.
No, don't laugh, I mean...
I'm being really
serious right now, okay?
I really liked it.
And then...
And then you come,
here you are, you know,
you're walking on in to...
to work,
and my stomach does like
this really weird thing
that I've like never,
like I've never felt before.
And, um,
you know what I've realized?
I've realized
that I don't think,
like, at all, when I'm with you.
I just... I kind of exist.
And oh, okay, yeah, I'm done.
And then I...
I just kind of melt.
And look, Mason,
I know that it's...
Um... I know that it
sounds like an excuse,
but I... I don't know,
I think I've just been so
terrified of this feeling,
the truth is I, I'm just
scared of it stopping.
And, um, God... um...
[soft pensive music]
So, I guess, I'm trying
to say that I wanna go on...
Oh, God, I wanna go
on a date with you
and have it not be for,
like, a bet.
That's, yeah, that's all.
That's why I've run here to you.
[soft piano music]
God, why didn't
you do that sooner?
-Oh, shut up.
-Well, you should have tried
-like to move me or something.
-I tried.
What do you think?
I mean, this is silly.
[laughs]
-This is like all mine?
-Yeah.
Like forever?
They're not gonna take it down?
Unless you get fired.
That won't happen.
Wait, do I have
to call you boss?
-No, ew, weird.
-Okay.
Look at me. Me.
Leah Jones, junior designer.
Promoted looks
really good on you.
Hey, I'm proud of you.
Thanks, B.
I'm proud of you.
Okay, you've got...
What's going on with you?
-Me?
-You've got some like--
I don't know,
I'm like totally normal.
Oh my God.
Did you?
I don't know, maybe.
Who knows?
I don't know, but...
Congratulations.
Yes, a pleasure, thank you
so much. Make an appointment.
-Anytime.
-Anytime.
In my office.
-See me in my office.
-I'll see you in my office.
Oh, okay.
Hi. [laughs]
[footsteps receding]
-Okay.
-This is the perfect cake.
[Leah] I know.
-Good choice.
-Kind of killed it.
Yeah.
-Can you fix my hair?
-Okay, oh, yeah.
-Wow, kind of sexy.
-You look great.
-I know, let's go in.
-Let's talk about that later.
Okay.
-Hey, now.
-What?
[indistinct chatter]
-[all cheer]
-Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday, dear Gigi
Happy birthday to you
[all cheer and applaud]
Make a wish, make a wish.
[all cheer and applaud]
[soft guitar music]
[soft guitar music ends]
Okay, um,
what is your purgatory?
What do you mean?
Well, you know, like
mine's being trapped in,
like, an elevator with, like,
endless Christmas music playing.
Okay, okay, I'm on board, um...
stuck upside down
on a roller coaster.
Yeah, no, that'd be terrible.
-Right?
-Yeah, really bad.
Awful.
Okay, your idea of heaven?
Endless tacos and no traffic.
Yeah, agreed.
You?
Thunderstorms.
But like, on command.
-Oh, nice, just like...
-Like I'm commanding them.
Yeah.
Just like heaven, nice, okay.
Okay, you should know this:
I have a fear of ants.
-Okay.
-I don't like 'em.
-It's good to know.
-Mm-hmm.
For me, it's clowns.
-What the hell?
-I lied to you.
-I knew it.
-[both laugh]
-I freaking knew that.
-I totally did.
I totally lied to you.
Sorry about that.
That's okay.
-Allergies?
-Douchebags.
-Naturally.
-Mm-hmm.
Dating apps?
Deleted.
Weeks ago.
-Nice. [laughs]
-[camera lens shutters]
You're contagious
Never seen nobody
Move so dangerous
And the fact is I ain't
Never gonna shake this
Oh no, no, oh no, no, no
I'm getting sick of like
A love temptations
So fair like the juice
I'm craving
And the fact is
You're a little contagious
Oh no, no, oh, no, no, no
Moving sweet and sultry
If I may
I'm moving in
I got the diagnosis
Doc says my heart
Is craving
A daily dose for saving
I just wanna be the one
Gotta be the one you call
Wanna be your front mind
Yeah, I need to be
The one you sleep with
The one you wanna be with
The one
You're getting tired
[upbeat dramatic music]
[upbeat dramatic music]
I'm kinda waiting for the one
Who keeps my heart beating
More of the one
I'm feeling right now
Keeps repeating
Never know
If I don't let go
I gotta know
There is a list of what
Is right and what is wrong
I wanna do it all
Make on this on my own
I gotta know
I gotta go
[upbeat dramatic
music quiets down]
[water runs]
-[phone rings]
-Wow.
Welcome to Bing Bop Toys,
home of the talking Teddy Bears.
This is Leah.
All right, cut the crap.
You're off the clock.
[chuckles]
Whoa, what?
What are you doing working
on a weekend, you psycho?
My Manolos don't
pay for themselves.
Where are you?
-I'm at... I'm at Buzz's.
-Oh.
The part-time
bubble soccer instructor?
He's athletic.
Is that what we're
calling it these days?
He's hot.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah.
-Oh.
-[Buzz singing]
-Show me the room.
-I'm not showing you the room.
-Show me the room.
-Fine.
Ew.
Ugh. Who are you dating again?
His name is Ben.
At least I think it is.
There's been a couple this
month, so it's been confusing.
Yeah, I know,
you have a menagerie of Bens.
-Yeah.
-Yeah.
Anyway, ew, oh,
okay, I'm hanging up.
-Bye.
-[phone chimes]
[Bianca clears throat]
Hey.
Hey, uh...
You're on the pill, right?
Why?
Uh, you know, it's actually,
it's probably fine. [laughs]
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
Uh, what's...
what's probably fine?
Okay, word.
Um...
It snapped.
It snapped?
Yeah, like... pfft.
Snapped.
No, I know what that means.
In half.
-Phew. Okay, okay.
-Cool.
We can go to the store.
We'll go to the store,
and that's cute.
We can go
to the pharmacy together.
No, I can't.
You can't?
No.
I'm getting ready
for my callback, babe.
It's like a possible
callback, so...
That's not how callbacks work,
I'm pretty sure.
Look, you're really, really hot.
Thank you.
Like I really would like
to just...
Again.
You're awesome.
Like, a solid six outta 10.
Here. It's not
a bad place to be.
But my career's kinda like
taking off right now, you know?
And I can't have anybody
getting in the way of that, so.
I mean, it wouldn't
be fair, you know?
To the fans.
To your fans?
The fans from
the background modeling job
that you did for Home Goods?
Those fans.
I got like 250 followers
outta that gig. [laughs]
I'm crushing it.
Right.
So, if you would excuse me.
I got a callback
to prep for. [grunts]
[Exhales]
[soft ethereal music]
Running a little
low over here, Tilda.
How long has it been
since we lost Buddy?
It'd be five years
this Saturday.
Sweet man.
Lord rest his soul.
He gave you
a wonderful life, Georgia.
Don't give him all the credit.
We built that saddle
company together.
-He was lovely.
-He was a prince.
Unlike my scoundrel of an ex.
Screw him and the horse
he rode in on.
I'm ashamed to say it might have
been on one of our saddles.
[all laugh]
I just love our
little gatherings.
[all laugh]
So, Marly is getting
ready for her first baby?
And you got one marching
down the aisle soon, Edith.
June 7.
Don't you forget it.
What?
What?
-Well?
-Well, what?
Come on, Georgia, how's Leah?
How's my drink, Tilda?
[Tilda exhales deeply]
[spoon clinking]
[languid guitar music]
[door chimes]
Of course.
[clears throat]
Excuse me.
Hi.
You, yeah.
Um hi, could I get a Baby Free.
Hmm?
Could...
Could I get a Baby Free?
A what?
A Baby Free.
What is that?
Could I get
into this box, please?
[chuckles]
I see you.
-Nice.
-Okay.
-Do you have the key?
-No, I don't. Uh...
I gotta get my
manager for that.
Great, that'd be great.
Scarlett?
Scarlett?
What do you need Scarlett for?
Oh, she needs the Baby Free.
Oh.
That's me.
Yeah, I don't
know where she's at.
No, me neither.
Well,
could you call her, please.
-Oh, yeah.
-Totally.
[Voice amplified on P.A.]
Hey, Scarlett,
got a customer
that needs a Baby Free.
Can you bring up the safe sex
keys for the Baby Free?
Scarlett?
It'll just be
a couple of minutes.
Yeah.
Scarlett, she's in a hurry.
We gotta get the Baby Free out.
Hey, baby!
-Hi.
-What's the brand you prefer?
Um I don't know if
I heard correctly,
but I think she might
need the Baby Free.
And I'll do the box of extra-
long Platinum Ultra-Guards.
Certainly. [laughs]
[keys jingling]
You can't wield a sword
without a shield, now, can we?
-Uh, no.
-Straight facts.
Scarlett, please.
-Oh.
-Hi.
So, do you like, party, or...?
Oh my God.
Mm-hmm.
So helpful.
Congrats.
Thank you.
I'm single if you wanna hang.
I bet he's got weak swimmers.
I'll bet he doesn't.
I took Baby Free once.
Felt like I shot a cannonball
from my lady bottom.
Oh, God.
God, you know, the things
men will never understand.
Let's egg Buzz's car and then
get you back out there.
Okay, yeah, no.
Let's just wait until after
my ovaries are done arguing
like my parents used to.
-Okay.
-Okay.
Babe, you should
really come out tonight.
I'm meeting Ben Number 3 at that
place with the sticky floors.
The sticky floors?
-Yeah.
-Wow.
No, I won't be there.
He has friends.
Good for Ben Number 3.
I mean, when was
the last time you went out?
Like, actually out, out?
I was just out
with you the other day.
No, it's been
like four months.
Okay, okay, you know what?
Maybe I'll come tonight.
-Liar.
-Yeah.
Margaret, can you
leave the rent check
on the counter in
the morning, please?
Margaret?
-[Leah knocks]
-Margret?
-Oh, no.
-[footsteps tapping]
I'm not moving in with you.
Did she get deported?
Is she from Canada?
I don't know, I literally
never talk to her.
I don't speak
to her either, clearly.
She misspelled opportunity.
And then she just left?
Yeah, she just left.
And our rent is
due on Thursday, so...
How about her
security deposit?
No, Mr. Smith already let
us dip into that last month.
Also, he keeps asking when
you'll be back, by the way.
[Gigi laughs]
Just get a new
roommate, that's easy.
Easy? Do you know how
much effort it takes
to find a sane roommate?
How about that
Craigslist thingie?
Oh, that's so depressing.
What?
What's the matter with you?
Let's see, Buzz dumped me.
After he admitted
that the condom broke, so.
Well, you're on
the pill, aren't you?
No.
No, I haven't been on the pill.
Not since I gained 30
pounds of water weight
and Veronica Summers told me
I looked like a bean bag chair.
-That's incredibly stupid.
-Okay.
Besides,
the right guy is gonna like you
no matter what shape you are.
News flash,
love, it's extinct.
It is, it's like dial-up
and the dodo bird, okay?
Do you know how marriage began?
I can tell you, marriage
began by fathers trading
their daughters for the
fattest pig in the county fair.
That was marriage back then.
Now, now, it is just,
it is a freaking desert,
I'm telling you.
You know
who survived the desert.
Jesus Christ.
Yeah, Him.
I mean, after it was over,
He went home for a minute,
but then He went
right back out into the world.
Mm-hm. And, Gigi, did you
read the rest of the story?
Because I hate to
break it to you,
things didn't work out too
well for Him in the end.
Well, he had a big following.
Mm-hmm.
You know,
I think 40's a good number.
What, 40?
-What's happening?
-[Gigi laughs]
I'll tell you what--
I have an idea.
-Oh, God.
-Okay.
You go on 40 dates
outside your apartment.
And if, after that,
you have found a guy
who's totally a keeper,
I will pay your rent for a year.
Okay, or you could
just loan me the money,
and I'll pay you back
in interest.
[Laughs] No,
we're not gonna do that.
You're gonna have
to earn it this time.
I'm not baling you out again.
And no doubling up
on these guys.
And no hanky-panky.
No hanky-panky?
-That's right.
-No...?
And I guarantee you
that at the end of 40 days
and 40 nights,
you will have found
somebody so special
that he will have you running
every red light in town
just to get a kiss.
Mm. Wow.
Okay, and then what
happens, you know,
if I find my true
love by date one?
Why go on 39 more?
Because it's not the deal.
You realize I'm only
gonna be proving to you
that men suck?
[Gigi laughs]
Is it a yes?
Wow.
[clears throat]
You can sleep on it.
No, yeah,
I-I should sleep on it.
Mm-hmm.
Otherwise,
there's the county fair.
Okay.
Your grandma's literally
trying to pimp you out.
Yeah, she thinks I'm a hermit.
Well, you're on your way there.
I mean, at least
I can pay for rent with that.
I mean, all you gotta do
is swipe right on 40 randos,
be nice, and then boom.
You're pimped.
Do you wanna know
the real kicker?
What?
I have to abstain.
-Ugh. Ew.
-I know.
And, like,
what if I meet a sociopath?
I dated a sociopath once.
Oh my God, that's right.
-Crazy Pete.
-Crazy Pete.
Oh, he was sweet.
Hey, when's the last time
you really put yourself
into something?
I put myself in the car every
morning when I go to work.
I do.
Okay, hey, don't
take this the wrong way,
but you don't really
have a thing right now.
Yeah, I know.
We get it, I'm single.
Even I'm trying a new thing.
-What? You have a thing?
-Yeah.
Why didn't you tell me
that you had a new thing?
I go again tonight.
You wanna come?
Prove to Geege
you're not living under a rock.
White wine or tequila?
Girl.
-Water.
-[Leah laughs]
-Yeah, okay.
-Okay.
[Mavis] Straight legs,
straight legs, gorgeous.
Anna, not like that.
No.
Clench ladies, clench.
-Turn, spin.
-[Leah] I'm gonna kill her.
B?
I thought you were joking.
You should chug that.
Welcome back, Bianca!
And who's your friend?
Oh, Leah, yes, very new.
Aerial virgin. Welcome.
I am Mavis.
[both inhale and exhale deeply]
Okay, let's pop that cherry.
-Let's pop that cherry.
-Yeah, marvelous!
Oh.
Do you not remember?
I literally had to take
a special gym class
because my upper body
strength was so bad.
Veronica Summers used
to throw kickballs at me
and make me fall off
the climbing rope.
Love, we should really unpack
this with a professional.
Okay, ladies, once
you are done stretching,
we'll get to climbing.
If either of you are on
a juice cleanse or a detox,
please use the bathroom
first before you...
We just got the mats cleaned.
-Oh my God.
-Okay.
-Yeah.
-Thank you.
No problem.
Hey, you're stronger than
you were in high school!
You got it.
-Like that?
-Yeah.
Just see yourself
at the top of it.
You visualize.
-I'm just gonna run.
-No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
[Bianca] At least you
left the house yesterday.
[Leah] I leave the house.
Yeah, for morning-after pills.
You know, her terms
are completely insane.
It's like, no sex?
You can't even buy a car
without driving it
around the block first.
[both laugh]
I don't know,
maybe I'll do it with you.
No, really, I'll swear off
sex if you do it too.
It'll be a good
test for the Bens.
Wait, you would,
you would really wait for me?
Not for you, with you.
Why can't we just
be in love together?
Because my lower half
doesn't want your lower half.
Okay.
-Scratch it.
-Okay, okay.
[telephone ringing]
[soft pensive music]
You don't really have
a thing right now.
[cup taps]
[phone chimes]
Oh, God.
[Edith] My eyes don't
allow for this game.
But your liver spots
are glowing.
Oh.
When do these dates start?
Tonight.
You're not worried
about her going out
with all these strangers?
Ooh, what if she
meets a murderer?
Well, then I'm coming
off the hook for the rent.
Have a little faith, girls.
[Edith and Gigi laugh]
[all] Cheers.
This is great.
I'm so glad we're doing this.
I'm so glad you said yes
to this.
Me too.
Have you been here before?
I've never been
here before, have you?
I have, it's really,
the bruschetta, actually.
That's amazing,
we should get that.
-Yeah?
-Yeah, yeah.
I always say
if I could suffocate on that,
it would be
a very painless death.
[chuckles]
-That was a joke.
-No, I know, you're very funny.
-Oh, okay.
-[Curt chuckles]
-Thank you.
-Yeah, let's just, uh.
See what we're working...
-Ooh. Oh my God.
-Okay.
Uh, bruschetta, right?
Bruschetta, yeah.
Or "broo-sketta."
-Yeah.
-What?
-Nothing.
-Oh, okay.
-You look beautiful.
-Should we-- Thank you.
Should we do the bruschetta
and then--
I just wanna like, I just
wanna look at you for a second.
Okay.
I'm sorry, are you cool
if we go Dutch?
Dutch, as
in the pancakes or split?
Split it.
-Just 'cause I...
-Right.
Is that bad?
-Is that, that's bad,
-No.
-That's bad, I'm sorry.
-Mm-mm, mm-mm.
It's just the apps
are, like, 12 bucks.
And I didn't even look
at the entrees yet.
-And, uh...
-Yeah, let's split it.
-Would you like another?
-Yes, please.
Just give that to me.
Thank you so much.
Are you gonna drink like that?
We should get a bottle
if that's the case.
-I'd love a bottle.
-Cheaper.
You know what else I'd love?
Let's take a photo.
[chuckles]
Oh?
Yeah, great.
That's amazing.
Stirred, not shaken.
-[phone chimes]
-Why was I shaken, just...
Well, bless your heart, honey.
[phone slams]
That's not gonna do.
-What happened?
-Refill?
Oh, yes.
You know,
Italian food's the best.
It sure is.
Do you know what
else is the best?
Wine. [laughs]
It pairs great with more wine.
You're back?
I am back, yes.
Oh...
Thank you.
Hoo.
Okay, so, how do you know Ben?
Well, we were actually
roommates for a while.
And then he wanted to get a dog.
I love dogs.
And I'm just not
an animal person.
Oh, yeah, right.
Allergies, yeah.
You know, I get allergies too.
Yeah, I'm not allergic,
I don't like animals.
You don't like any animals?
Are you a psychopath
or something?
[laughs]
I'm working on my business,
that's my focus.
Your business--
what is your business?
It's actually
edible arrangements,
but it's got a twist.
Okay, so,
a twist with fruit or...?
No, they have that, it's
various assortments of potatoes.
-Wow.
-Right?
It just hit me.
Yeah.
-Of course.
-They have the fruit.
Yeah, they have that.
-Right.
-Not the potatoes.
-No.
-No. Could we take a photo?
-I guess.
-Mm-hmm.
That's great.
That's all I need.
Can I take another?
-You...
-I think I messed it up.
No, you, okay,
I don't really care.
Just say tater tot on three.
[together] Tater tot.
[upbeat music]
[munches and slurps]
And this is Lyle
during Halloween.
He's a little dragon.
I love it he's gonna
keep me safe forever.
First birthday,
had a seven-layer dip.
Finished it like that.
-Wow.
-Okay, he's a unicorn.
-Yes.
-He identifies as a unicorn.
And you can't call
him anything else
-'cause he doesn't like that.
-Got it.
It's Lyle,
look at that tongue.
And then, St. Patty's,
we were just knocking
them back like that.
Like, he couldn't hold
his liquor, though.
He threw up a little bit.
This is Valentine's Day.
It's my sexy little beast.
I'm surrounded
by pussy, you know.
-Get it?
-Oh, I get it, get it.
Cats, pussy, surrounded?
Oh, Count Catula?
Get it?
-[Leah hisses]
-Because he's...
-Yes, [hisses]
-[Leah chuckles]
He's beautiful.
[Man] Then there's
my bro Jonathan.
He thought it'd be a good
idea to have a meeting
that could have
just been an email,
just to distract Timothy from
making his second-quarter quota.
You know what second
quarter is, right?
[upbeat music]
[Leah sighs]
I've gotta go.
I'm so tired, I'm so tired
So tired of trying
No, you need
to listen to me, okay?
Here's my problem.
I feel like everybody...
-What?
-Okay.
[laughter]
Cheers.
Cheers.
Wow, that's fast.
You know, you remind
me of my ex-wife,
except she had, you know,
smaller boobies.
So, what made you
swipe right, huh?
I just felt like
your personality
is gonna be great.
Oh, boy.
[both laugh]
Can I get another one, please?
I have to go.
-You used to make me shine
-[camera shutter snaps]
You know my vibrator
overheated last night.
I had to stick it in the fridge.
Wait, are we allowed
to be using those?
-I am.
-Shit.
You know, you should
just take 20 pictures
with some random guys here
and send them to Geege.
No, mm-mm, mm-mm, no.
I might be horny but I do
not, I do not play dirty.
-[Bianca sighs]
-Okay.
Date number 20,
what's his name?
[both laugh]
-Who cares, doesn't matter.
-I don't care.
-Doesn't matter.
-I don't care.
[sighs]
Do you wanna climb tonight?
You can take out all this
frustration on your forearms.
Yeah.
-Okay.
-Yeah.
Listen, it kind of feels
like leaved being tied up.
Oh God.
-Okay, we have a meeting.
-That needs to stop, okay.
-All right.
-Love you, bye.
[low-key music]
-[all cheer]
-Oh.
[traffic rushes]
Hey, so sorry I'm late.
How'd you know I'm your date?
Funny thing happened,
I walked in, and the waiter
pointed right at you.
Do I know you from somewhere?
No.
-Are you sure?
-Positive.
-Huh.
-Weird.
-I think I do.
-You don't.
-Leah.
-Steven.
Oh, but you two definitely
know each other.
Yeah, no, we go way back.
About 20 dates.
[clears throat]
-Starters?
-That would be great.
Could we
please get the "broo-sketta"?
Yes.
You've been here before?
Yes, it's very good.
And the little numbers
on the side of the dishes,
they don't,
they don't scare you?
The prices?
No, prices don't scare me.
What about clowns?
They're only allowed
in the bedroom.
[Leah chuckles]
[Mason] There she is.
Aw, I didn't know
you could smile.
Wine, please, Steven.
-Got it.
-Thank you, Steven.
Yes.
So, what's wrong with you?
You go on dates with men
just to figure
out what's wrong with them?
No.
That sounded like a yes.
Well, it came out as a no.
Who hurt you as a child?
God, physically
or emotionally?
Pick one.
Hands down, Veronica Summers.
Well, screw Veronica Summers.
-Yes.
-Right?
Finally, somebody
agrees with me.
Totally, yes.
-She's the worst.
-The worst.
-You hate her?
-Yeah, already.
-Okay, that's good.
-Yeah.
What do you do?
Um...
I own a marketing company.
We specialize
in 3D animation models.
So, that's your thing?
My thing?
Yeah, you know,
your passion, your... thing.
No, no, I wouldn't
say it's my passion.
It's just what I do.
So, you don't
have a thing either?
I've got lots of things.
It's just marketing
is not one of them.
Cool.
So, what about family?
What about them?
First date question,
I don't know.
Okay, weird.
My mom's a workaholic.
I see her sometimes.
Not really,
I don't see her at all.
My Dad moved to
Florida years ago,
with his, like, third wife.
And it's pretty much just me
and my grandma here, Gigi.
Gigi?
Gigi.
Do you have any friends?
Excuse me?
I just...
Sorry, you just
seem kind of lonely.
Lonely? Wow.
Okay, says the single
28-year-old man.
What does my age have
to do with anything?
No, no, nothing, nothing.
Just that most men
your age are taken by now.
They're not going
on blind dating apps
and stockpiling condoms.
Baby Free Girl.
Oh my God,
you're Baby Free Girl.
Okay, you can piss off now!
-Wow, aren't you a peach.
-I am.
[Mason] That's very nice.
-[Leah] You're very nice.
-Are we ready?
No, no, Steven,
I'm sorry, we're not ready.
-Well, dessert?
-No, Steven.
Um, I think I hit a nerve.
-You think?
-Yeah, I do.
So, I'm gonna get out of here.
Got an early workday anyway.
'Cause he has a thing.
Enjoy the "broo-sketta,"
and I hope you find
your thing one day.
-Thank you.
-Have a good night.
Geez, I mean, what a dick.
Did you hear what he said?
Bruschetta, "broo-sketta."
[Imitating]
"Broo-sketta."
-Love?
-Yeah.
What are you getting
out of all this?
Is free rent
a good enough answer?
In this economy,
my inclination is yes.
[Leah chuckles]
What are you really
getting out of it?
Steven, do you have a thing?
Last time I checked, yes.
But it doesn't swing
in your direction.
Shame, but not what I meant.
Listen, everybody has a thing.
[Leah sighs]
[Leah sighs]
[line rings]
Hey, date 20 was a bust.
Where are you?
[Man] Coming up at Jawbone,
we have some new faces,
along with folks
we know and love.
-What's up, bro?
-Dude, thought you had a date.
I did, she was a trip.
Do not ask.
I need a drink.
Yeah, hey, can we
get two drinks, please?
[man chatters indistinctly]
-Hey.
-Hey.
-That's for you.
-Ooh, love you.
Thank you.
Thank you, thank you,
thank you.
Those are for you.
All right, I gotta catch up.
-You know I'm gonna ask.
-Mm-mm.
It was so bad, don't ask.
Okay, what are we doing here?
Okay, well, you
followed me here.
Right.
I'm here supporting
Ben Number 2's poetry project.
[Man] Oh, and Ben
is gonna be with us tonight.
-Oh my God, is that him?
-Yeah.
-[Man] Stick around.
-Hi, Ben.
Hi.
So, what's the event tonight?
Um, my coworker said
that it's open mic.
A scattered wind
drifts across.
Autumn prepped to sing her song.
Such a strong song.
Have you heard this stuff
before, or first time?
-First time.
-Right. Got it.
[Ben] ...for Eve's bite.
She takes a bite.
Haummm...!
Juicy.
-[Ben] Eve is just as juicy...
-Mm-mm.
Yeah, I thought he
meant, um,
stand-up.
-Mm-mm.
[Ben] Adam's got beef.
-Shh.
-[Ben]God's got beef.
-You can't laugh.
-Sorry.
-[Ben] 'Cause you're in trouble.
I thought it was
supposed to be funny.
[indistinct crosstalk]
The girls are mad.
The boys are mad.
God, wow, it's terrible.
[Ben] And it's Eve's fault
that we learned to sew.
-[Ben] Now, it's winter.
-Oh my God.
-She's here.
-Oh my God.
-What?
-The guy from my date.
-The guy.
-[Ben] Thanks for nothing, Eve.
Don't look.
We're not looking.
-Who's here?
-My date is here.
-How is that possible?
-Where?
She's right down the bar.
That's insane.
Bro, she's hot.
Doesn't matter, she's crazy.
-Was it really that bad?
-Mm-hmm, mm-hmm, yeah.
-It was bad. A douche.
-Ugh.
-Okay.
-What's happening?
Okay, I'm gonna go over there.
-Oh.
-Yeah.
I don't think
that's a good idea.
No, I'm gonna go over there.
Don't worry, watch this.
Oh, she's coming.
Ah, crap.
-Hey.
-Hi.
Is this your bedtime routine?
Bad poetry and bar nuts?
How did you find me?
Oh, please, I didn't find you.
Don't flatter yourself.
Do you have a vendetta
against happiness?
No, actually, I love happiness.
I breathe happiness.
[Mason]
Careful, bro, this one bites.
-Hi.
-Hello.
You know who you remind me of?
You remind me of the kind of guy
that small little kids run from,
-screaming.
-No, no, no, no, no.
See, they run to me
because you stole their candy
-and made them cry.
-Funny.
By the way, you have some
self-tanner left on your hands.
I don't use self-tanner.
Then why did you just look?
-You're childish.
-You're childish.
-Oh my God.
-Oh my God.
Oh my God. [laughs]
Hi, hello, would you like
an autograph or something?
Um... I'm Matt.
Mm. And I'm mad.
-Okay.
-Okay.
You've got your
hands full, buddy.
That right there is why I left.
Oh my God,
don't even listen to him.
I just wanna hang
out with my friend.
Yeah, okay, so, do I.
See-- see her over there?
Yeah, hi.
That's my bestie.
Oh, so you do have friends?
Yeah, I have plenty of friends,
and I actually don't
really know why you care.
Hundreds, thousands, could
fit them all in a yearbook.
I bet two people
signed your yearbook:
one of them was your mom,
and one of them was your
school guidance counselor.
What is wrong with you?
I don't know,
plenty, apparently.
-Bye, Matt.
-Bye.
That went well.
Unbelievable.
I like her.
So, number 20
was that bad, huh?
Mm-hmm,
I owe that guy a new shirt.
Mm.
You got 21 lined up?
Uh-huh, I'm cleansing
so I'm ready, you know?
Mm.
What about you?
You have any hot
dates coming up?
As a matter of fact, I do.
His name is Frank,
and I met him at swim class.
Okay, Frank, tell me more.
Well, he's deaf in one eye
and blind in the other.
But other than that,
he's fit as a fiddle.
Okay, changing my mind
about Frank.
he sounds like a stray cat.
[Gigi laughs]
-Where are you going?
-Well, I have to meet B.
Oh, how is the fire queen?
Okay, can you stop that.
I'm just saying,
y'all out there on the porch
smoking a joint
and almost burnt it down.
I know, and I've
apologized many times.
-Just saying.
-It was the joint. It wasn't me.
Okay, where are you going?
-Silks class.
-Oh, oh!
Oh, that curtainy thing?
Yeah, yeah,
you flip and stuff.
No kidding, can you flip?
No, no, I can't flip.
I'm just trying to get
my feet off the mat.
That's, like, hard,
but I'm doing it, you know?
It's a thing,
and it's good, and I like it.
-Well, it's a goal.
-It's a goal, it's a thing.
-Flipping.
-Flipping.
[Gigi laughs]
I'm getting more flexible.
-Yeah, look at you.
-Ow.
-I'm really sore.
-God, you need help.
-Okay, I love you.
-Bye, honey.
I'll see you.
Leah, remember,
grip, step, step.
Like an inchworm
ascending her destiny.
Right.
Hey, Leah, maybe you'll
find love at the top.
[Leah laughs]
Okay, I got this.
Veronica Summers
can suck my dick.
[upbeat vocal music plays]
It's okay.
[Leah shrieks]
[Leah laughs]
[Bianca] Keep going,
keep going.
Fudge it, oh shit.
Oh, oh, oh.
[body thuds]
-Ow.
-Are you okay?
Yeah, she's fine here.
Hey, Leah, wanna
go to drag brunch?
Mimosas?
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
I don't like being
fed like a baby.
Okay, no.
That's okay.
-But my mother likes it.
-Good for her.
Oh, oh.
Oh God, oh.
Oh, okay, okay.
Okay.
That was weird.
So, that's unfortunate.
Okay.
Oh, oh, I don't...
Holy shit!
-Oh.
-Oh.
-Sorry, I'm so sorry.
-I'm so...
-[Mason chuckles] Great.
-You again.
Wow, I'm really happy to see you
getting the help that you need.
Are you lost? The children's
section's that way.
Very funny.
You know I actually had to
get that shirt dry cleaned,
so that'll be 40 bucks if
you wanted to make it up to me.
I will, when you apologize.
Me apologize?
No, no, no, no.
It wasn't me that was making
us both miserable that night.
Look, Mason, I...
[beat-driven music]
[whistle blows]
[bonk]
Veronica Summers.
Is that like your alter ego?
No, it's mine.
Leah Jones,
as I live and breathe.
[unamused chuckle]
And look,
you finally filled out
your training bra. Cute.
-Thank you.
-Oh, Ronnie, Ronnie...
Veronica Summers?
In another life.
When Leah and I went
to high school together.
Oh.
Oh, sure.
Well, at least it's not
those weird comic books
you read backwards.
It's manga. You're--
you're referring to manga,
but... you knew that.
Hey, I like manga.
You know, Leah used to get
in trouble all the time
for drawing her goofy
little characters
instead of paying
attention in class.
Well, I mean--
You know.
You totally broke
the stereotypes.
Because most nerds,
they make good grades.
Except my brother always said
he always used to see you
in summer school.
Yeah, well, you know,
your brother and I
had a lot in common, Ronnie.
-Did you?
-Mm-hmm.
See, I don't recall my
brother catching our daddy
in bed with his secretary.
-Whoa.
-Oh, wow.
-Okay.
-That's a bit much.
Oh, I'm just playing.
She and I banter like this
all the time, don't we?
Yeah, yes, I've missed it.
Don't worry.
By the way, you two
make a perfect couple,
so just best of luck.
Yes, and namaste.
-Oh.
-[books thud]
They should move that.
-She's so cute, isn't she?
-[footsteps recede]
Hm.
I thought Veronica Summers
moved to like
Australia or something?
Oh, yeah, well, she
moved back, apparently.
-Ugh.
-Yeah, I know.
Well, as much as I love
to trash Veronica Summers...
Me too.
...I sort of came here
for some trash reality TV.
Whoa.
-Okay, blast from the past.
-I know.
-What is this?
-I'm on one today.
-[Leah chuckles]
-Ohh.
Wow.
I don't know why
you ever stopped.
These are good.
I don't know, I think it was
after my mom left, you know?
I just sort of started
freezing in class.
I hate she did that to you.
I hate it too.
[soft melancholic music]
-Leah...
-I know.
You don't have to say it.
It's not high school anymore.
Yeah.
I need a really good
dress for tonight.
-Yeah?
-Yeah.
Like a really good one.
That's my girl.
I'm thinking like
a little side boob.
-I love side boobs.
-Not too much.
-Just a little...
-A tasteful side boob.
-Tasteful side boob.
-Yeah.
-Classy, slutty side boob.
-Hot.
Thank you.
-Hey.
-Yes.
This is good.
Thank you.
-Lucky number 26?
-[Leah chuckles]
You've been
counting too. [laughs]
She's an artist, I see.
She is a doodler.
When I was a kid, I used
to steal my sister's crop tops
and sing show tunes
in the basement.
And when my dad caught
me, you know what he did?
He bought me a pink
karaoke machine for Christmas,
complete
with a rhinestone microphone.
Hell yeah.
He never missed one recital.
It's okay
to let people know you.
[upbeat dramatic music]
Holy shit.
Girl, even my panties
are in a bind right now.
-Goodbye.
-Welcome!
Hi, I'm Jackson,
Frank's grandson.
Leah, Gigi's granddaughter.
Can we have two glasses
of Veuve to start.
Hope that's okay.
I like to kick dinner off
with a little champagne.
Oh, no, that's more than okay.
I actually happen
to be a huge advocate
for alcoholic appetizers, so.
Oh, I can already tell
you're a load of fun.
Mm.
Oh, you have no idea.
Let's hope you can keep up.
Oh, challenge accepted.
Okay.
Where have you been
all this time, Leah?
I think the question is more...
where have you
been all this time?
Let's get some
oysters goin', huh?
Absolutely.
[upbeat dramatic
music continues]
Welcome to Bing Bop Toys.
Home of the talking teddy
bears, how may I help...
[sighs] You.
Hi.
I'm here to see Bailey Wakemore.
Who I just realized
is your boss.
Yeah?
Yeah, wow.
Why are you here?
I'm just pitching
a few ideas for our subsidiary.
Hm.
Nice tie.
-Thank you.
-Yeah.
You can have a sit,
uh, in that one.
Over there, not that one,
the one that's farthest from me.
-Oh, the furthest one, right.
-Yeah.
Bailey know that
you are so hospitable?
Look, all complaints
are actually dropped
in the empty tampon box, which
is right by the water fountain.
If you need an extra pen,
let me know.
Nice.
-Might take you up on that.
-Perfect.
-Psst.
-Oh God.
Psst?
Psst?
-Leah?
-Yeah.
Oh, you did hear, okay. Um.
I just wanted to say, the,
that thing Ronnie said to you,
at the bookstore the other day.
That was not cool.
In fact, beyond not cool.
It was extremely mean.
So, I'm sorry that
she said that to you.
I appreciate that. Thanks.
Yeah.
I didn't. Haven't
thought about it since.
-But thank you.
-Yeah.
[Bianca]
You can send him
to the conference
room now, Leah.
Well, well, that is your cue.
That's my cue.
Wait.
What?
Oh, God, okay.
Take off your tie.
-What?
-Your tie, take it off.
Uh, why?
Because.
Because Bailey hates ties.
Like, hates ties.
This isn't a prank?
Her dad was a funeral director,
so ties make her think
about dead bodies.
-Dead bodies?
-So, you--
That is so dark.
I know, well, look,
I didn't choose her childhood.
Wow, okay.
-That's her life, so.
-Feels like a prank, but okay.
-It's not a prank.
-I'll go with it, yeah.
You want the job,
or you don't want the job.
-Sure.
-Okay, that's good.
-Choosing to trust you.
-Yeah.
All right. Better?
Oh, no, oh God, okay.
Oh, thank you.
-Appreciate that.
-Why would you button this too?
-Can you breathe in them?
-Not while you're choking me.
-Okay.
-Thank you.
[Leah sighs]
-It's like you can breathe now.
-Yeah.
Better?
No, yeah, no,
it's better, it's good.
You look good, you look worthy.
Worthy?
Worthy for the job.
Why are you suddenly
being so nice to me?
You know, who knows?
Mercury just fell
out of retrograde.
-Really?
-It came back.
The Saturn returned,
I don't know. Go.
-Thank you.
-Yeah.
[soft guitar music]
[door opens]
-[keyboard clacking]
-[Leah sighs]
-Hey.
-Hey.
Celebratory drink?
You sold the design?
I did.
What? Wait.
Wait, that means
I sold the design.
How did you possibly
sell the design?
Because if you had
worn the tie, then you--
Oh, then I would have
looked like a dead body.
-Yes.
-Gotcha, yeah.
-Oh, this is really exciting.
-This is great for us.
We should go
get a celebratory drink.
What? Oh.
Yeah, no, I'm okay, thank you.
I don't really feel like being
run over by your girlfriend.
-Girlfriend?
-Yeah, Veronica.
Uh, no, she's old colleague.
I was getting a second opinion
over coffee, that's all.
Oh, yeah.
She looked
a little hot for a coffee.
Trust me, not a date.
Did she know that?
I would say that her wife
was plenty aware of it.
Yeah.
Plot twist
Wait, so, do you
think she was mean to me
because she thought
I was pretty?
Definitely.
Holy shit.
-Yeah.
-That changes everything.
It's wild, huh?
-Yeah.
-Yeah, mind blown.
-So, a drink?
-Oh.
-Not a date.
-Not a date, just a whiskey.
Okay, good, yeah,
'cause I can't,
I can't go on another
date with you.
That's fine,
I can't date you either.
-What?
-What?
Boheme at 5:15.
See you there.
[phone taps, phone chimes]
[phone dings]
-[phone chimes]
-[Bianca chuckles]
[phone chimes]
[phone chimes]
[phone chimes]
[soft guitar music]
So, why can't you go on
another date with me?
If we wanna call it that.
Mm.
Come on, tell me.
Come on.
Okay, okay, screw it.
My grandmother, Gigi,
made a bet, if you will.
She bet me
a large amount of money
that I could find love
in 40 consecutive dates.
-No way.
-Mm-hmm.
I'm one of your 40 dates!
Ha! Yeah. I mean,
if you wanna call it that.
I do wanna call it that.
Wow.
What number was I?
-20? What are we on?
-Damn!
-Mm-hmm.
Whoa. Are you sleeping
with any of these guys?
Wow, that is none
of your business.
Valid, sorry about that.
[glasses tapping]
Another round?
Um... yes, but...
Hm. 27's waiting.
-Shame.
-Yeah.
Before you go, open that up.
Why?
Humor me.
I case you need
an emergency call
in any of your terrible dates.
Feel free to hit me up.
I took drama in high school,
so my fake crying
is actually pretty on point.
Oh. But boys don't cry.
Oh, they do, it's
just, it's in the shower
where no one can see it.
Got it. How much?
No, no, no, don't worry
about it, I got this.
-You sure?
-Yeah.
-Not a date.
-Not a date.
-Not a date.
-Not a date.
-Okay.
-[Mason laughs]
[footsteps tapping]
Oh, shit.
Ah, yes, thank you.
Aw.
27 is in good hands.
-[Mason laughs]
-[footsteps tapping]
[soft beat music]
How was lucky 27?
Oh, he was lucky all right.
[Mason] Oh, he was lucky?
Yeah, he was,
he was a photographer.
Mm-hmm.
Photographer.
-Question for you, though.
-Yeah.
Would you take photos
of used underwear?
Absolutely I would.
And I'll tell you all
about it over lunch.
Oh, yay.
Did you draw that?
No, no, Mason, no.
The little office elves
that run around here, they
actually broke in last night,
they drew this.
Leah, that's really good.
Okay, thank you.
Lunch?
As in a date?
Aww. That's cute.
It was a good try.
So, pictures of underwear,
like Fruit of the Loom?
Yeah, like who's even
into that, you know?
-No idea.
-I wear the cute kind.
Lots of cheek, lots of lace.
Leah Jones?
-Jackson, hi!
-Hey.
Oh my God.
God, you look amazing.
Oh, no, I mean,
I just, like, threw this on, so.
What's up, I'm Mason.
Oh, hey, yeah, Jackson.
Look, I had a really
amazing time the other night.
I'm sorry I haven't texted.
I've just been
slammed volunteering
with Frank's underprivileged
children's reading program
and teaching night
courses for first gen
non-English speakers
with disabilities.
Oh, yeah, no, I mean,
I, like, love languages, so.
Let's get together soon.
Sounds amazing.
-Amazing.
-Amazing.
-I'll text you.
-Okay.
Big dog.
Ohh.
Did you know that
you have two voices?
Huh?
You have two voices--
normal voice, secretary voice.
You totally just used
your secretary voice on him.
I did not.
-You 100% did.
-No, I didn't.
-Yeah, you did.
-Whatever.
-Besides, you can't date him.
-And why not?
-He's not your guy.
-Who says?
Let's just say that
your chemistry is amazing.
Shut up.
-Amazing.
-Stop.
He makes me flustered.
He gives me butterflies.
He does.
-Just saying.
-Come on.
How many people
have you been in love with?
-It's been a few.
-Great.
And?
It didn't work out, obviously.
-Obviously.
-Yeah.
-Look at you.
-[Mason laughs]
It just wasn't right.
What?
What?
No.
-What?
-No.
You were about to give me the
whole "she wasn't the one" talk.
-No, no, no, no, no.
-Yes.
See, I don't believe
in the one.
I believe that love is part
nature and part decision.
And it doesn't happen overnight.
It happens over
long stretches of time.
Thank you.
God, I could kiss you right now.
No one ever agrees with me.
Oh, shoot, I gotta go,
lunch is up.
All right, yeah.
Um...
Do I, like, really
have a secretary voice?
Yeah, you sure do,
and it doesn't fit you.
It's entirely too pleasant.
-God.
-[both laugh]
What up, bitch, I got fries.
[Bianca sniffles]
Oh, wow, what's...
Okay.
I'm getting fired.
What?
Yeah, no,
I'm getting fired today.
No, no, no, no.
Whose laptop is that?
Bailey's.
That's fine.
It's not fine.
Because I had all of the new
Bing Bop designs on there.
-Right.
-And I didn't,
I didn't back it up.
-Okay.
And, so, now,
they're gonna be gone.
-And we present on Monday.
-Oh.
-So.
-Monday?
-It's just like...
-Yeah.
Well, that's--
it's not Monday yet.
Okay, well, here's no, no,
no, no, here's the good
news, you want the good news?
I'm gonna fix it.
I'm gonna fix it.
-No, you're not.
-Yes, I am.
-No, you're not.
-I remember
what they look like
really good, by the way.
Really cute.
I can do it, this is easy.
I could--
Let me do this for you.
You don't remember
what they look like.
Yeah.
Come on, when have
I ever lied to you?
You lie to me, like,
all the time. [sobbing]
What?
Oh, not on the fries,
it's so bad for your skin.
[Bianca sobbing]
Hey, hey,
look at me, look at me.
[hand slaps]
You need to pull
yourself together.
[hand slaps]
Okay?
-Okay.
-Okay.
-Okay. That was crazy.
-Yeah, that was wild.
That was crazy. Thank you.
I'm gonna fix it, though.
I'm sorry for lying in the past.
It's okay.
[soft piano music]
[keyboard clacking]
[upbeat piano music]
B?
Is that right?
Yeah.
Yeah, it looks great.
-Yeah?
-Yeah.
-Okay, you're a lifesaver.
-You're good,
you can breathe now.
[soft piano music ends]
Ah, crap!
[phone dings, phone chimes]
[phone chimes]
[Leah chuckles]
Mason's coming over.
You owe that guy a shirt.
[Mason knocks]
[door opens]
Thank you, you're my hero.
You are welcome.
-Hi, Bianca, good to see you.
-Hi.
So, what, no date tonight?
No, already handled.
-[rackets tapping]
-[man groans and grunts]
-[racket tapping]
-[man grunts]
[man screams]
-Yikes.
-Yeah, he was a real keeper.
Oof, that's a lot.
Yeah, what are you doing,
where are you going?
I have to finish this proposal.
We were gonna watch a movie.
And I have errands to run.
-So, you're in charge.
-Nice.
Before you go, I emailed
you some ideas that I had
when I was working on
the other Bing Bops.
So, I was just wondering
if you could, like--
Okay.
I can show Bailey tomorrow.
-Thank you.
-Mm-hmm.
Okay.
-You two have fun.
-[Mason chuckles]
-Don't die.
-[Mason chuckles]
Love you so much.
-Love you, bye.
-It's good to see you.
[door closes]
What was that all about?
-It is Ouija board time.
-No, it's not.
-Yes, it is.
-No, it's not.
-No.
-Stay at my house...
I make the rules.
-I was put in charge.
-So...
No, you weren't.
[soft ethereal music]
[Leah sighs]
Yep.
-That's a lot to take in.
-Mm-hmm.
[soft ethereal music continues]
[Mason] That's an odd visual.
-Are we done?
-Nope, can't stop staring.
Okay.
Ah, there's my little spy.
I need a full report.
[Bianca sighs]
Well, there is a boy.
Oh.
I think it could
really be something.
So, there's reason for hope?
She seems... different.
Well, I'm optimistic.
How are you doing?
Me?
No, the other best friend.
Yes, you.
I'm fine.
You two are like
peas in a pod.
[Bianca laughs]
How about dinner?
I just happen to have
lasagna in the oven,
and I can't eat it by myself.
Yeah, yeah, I could eat.
Yeah.
[Angus]
Oh, Honeysuckle!
I could never live
another day without you!
Every second of
every minute of every day,
I think of
your rose petal lips.
[Honeysuckle] Oh, Angus,
how you've swept me off my feet
like a one-bedroom farmhouse
in a Kansas tornado!
-[Honeysuckle] Kiss me!
-So stupid.
Stupid? Are you mocking
their love?
-Absolutely.
-Why?
Because.
Come on, stuff like that
doesn't happen in real life.
Yes, it does.
Wait, wait, wait, are you saying
that with all these guys,
you've... what, you haven't got,
like, a text back?
Oh, no,
I've received texts back.
-You've gotten texts?
-Plenty of texts.
We both know
why I am dating so hard.
-So.
-Thank you.
Pass it on to you.
Why are you?
I'm really not.
-Oh, come on.
-I'm not.
Mr. Midday Condom Retrieval.
No, no, no, no, no, see,
those were not for me.
Those were for my buddy, Matt.
Matt?
Matt's real,
you met him at the bar.
Matt's not old enough
to buy his own condoms?
[sighs]
They were a gag gift.
It's for his birthday.
But I think your ex needed one.
Oh, no.
No, no, my ex had,
he had plenty.
He actually kept them,
he kept them in a fishbowl
of sorts by his bed.
This is a true story,
I'm not messing with you.
This is terrible.
-I know.
-That's terrible.
-Yeah, it's embarrassing.
-Oh, wow.
Wow, he sounds great.
Real genius, that one.
Yeah, yeah, your ex was--
she was a brain surgeon?
[Mason laughs]
No.
And?
Just... just happened.
Oh, no, come on,
there's always a moment.
What was it?
-Okay, funny story.
-Oh.
I came home from work one day,
and she'd moved
everything around.
In the kitchen,
the pots, the pans,
plates, silverware, everything.
It was just like, I couldn't
find any of my stuff.
No.
The plates were,
like, on the top shelf.
Totally out of reach.
And it didn't bother me at
the time, it really didn't.
But right after that,
we had started
just having, like,
problem after problem.
I just, I don't know, I just,
it's the beginning of the end.
Anyway, like, three weeks later,
she was gone, we had broken up.
And I put everything
back the way that it was,
the way it was supposed to be.
Of course.
I guess, my question
that I'm still kinda like
playing with my head is what,
like if she needed
like a change,
why didn't she just talk
to me about it, you know?
-Why not just ask me?
-Yeah.
You wanna know something
a little shitty, though?
I love shitty.
-Oh, you're in luck.
-Okay, hit me.
I...
[chuckles]
It only took me
about three weeks...
to forget that she had
ever lived with me.
-Oh, God.
-God.
-That's really bad.
-Terrible.
It's even worse
when I said it out loud.
But she rearranged
the pots, so.
-She was asking for it.
-She did?
-She did.
-She was asking for it.
-Yeah, she did do that.
-Yeah.
You gotta tell me something.
-What?
-Tell me something...
-Tell me something real.
-Okay, okay, okay.
-Okay.
-Come on.
For me, I just feel like
it's been a series of people
letting me down.
Not just guys,
like, my mom and my dad
and just people in general.
Yeah.
And so, I feel like
I sort of just...
retreated.
Yeah.
But the last few weeks,
although insane,
I feel like I've
caught my breath again.
Or at least I'm...
[exhales deeply]
...breathing again.
Well, that's good.
-It's good to breathe.
-You have to breathe.
I do.
I mean, I'd die without it, so.
Yes, you would.
[soft pensive music]
I don't know if that just
made any sense. [laughs]
Totally does.
I don't know, I, okay.
I guess what I'm trying
to say...
is I get it.
You know, in terms of us...
putting ourselves
back out there.
Thanks for the ear.
Any time.
[birds chirping]
[soft piano music]
Whatcha doing?
-Don't move.
-Okay.
Okay, if you move,
then I can't play my game.
Okay.
[Leah] How'd you sleep?
I slept really, really good.
Good.
Do not move.
Okay.
I'm gonna be so...
-[Leah laughs]
-[blocks clattering]
I'm so sorry.
-That was so close.
-I got so excited.
[both laugh]
Do you need coffee?
I would love some coffee.
Okay.
-Get up, then.
-Okay. [grunts]
Let me run to the bathroom.
Toothbrushes are
under the sink.
-Is that a hint?
-Yeah, you're disgusting.
[Mason laughs]
[hand taps]
A fruit so forbidden
A mask to be hidden
But we share the moon
As if we were free
Well, if I knew then
What I know now
These shackles here
Would be unbound
'Cause
[Mason] Any, uh,
big plans for the day?
-Here's your coffee.
-Oh, thank you.
Uh, yeah, actually,
I am gonna over to Gigi's.
Mm.
Gigi, yeah.
-Do you want cream cheese?
-Cream cheese would be great.
-Am I in the way?
-Mm-hmm.
Um... I'll take you.
No, you're fine, it's like
all the way across town.
I'm just gonna Uber.
-Are you sure?
-Yeah.
-No, it's fine, I can take you.
-You don't have to take me.
You don't have a car?
I-I do have a car.
Where's your car?
Um, it's in the shop.
-In the shop?
-Yeah.
What happened to your car?
Um...
-Mm, that's good.
-I know.
-There was a squirrel.
-There was a squirrel?
So, I swerved.
-Oh, no.
-Don't judge me.
I'm not judging you,
I'm waiting for you to share.
And then I hit a lamp,
but it's fine.
It's a squirrel, lamp, cool.
All righty, well, I'll take you.
Okay.
You'll like her.
-I'm excited to meet her.
-She's kind of crazy.
-Who's not?
-That's true.
-Hey, I got that.
-What?
-Yeah.
-I'm strong.
No, it's nothing, really.
-Okay.
-No problem.
-Thank you.
-Yeah.
-It's beautiful.
-I know.
I don't know
why I can't move in.
Oh, good, I just made cookies!
Oh, since when do you bake?
Since you've been
a very good girl.
So, last week?
Around then.
Who is this?
Mason Davis, ma'am.
Date number 20.
Oh, oh, so, you know
about our little agreement?
I do,
and I find it very refreshing.
Well, that means you have
a good sense of humor. [laughs]
Okay, this is nice.
Mason, thank you.
You can leave now,
you don't have to stay.
-That's okay.
-Actually,
it would be great if he could.
I have a very long
list of to-dos,
and I could use a little muscle.
She's joking.
You're joking.
-I'm not.
-Just tell me what to do, Gigi.
I would love to
tell you what to do.
This one's helpful,
but she's a little slow.
-Slow?
-I'm not slow.
-You coming?
-Yeah, I'm coming.
[hammer taps]
How's that, right there?
Yeah, um...
No, that's crooked.
It's not crooked,
it's perfect.
No, it's crooked.
It's not crooked,
you're crooked.
Step back.
Look, just a little bit crooked.
Yeah, you're right,
it's crooked.
[Leah laughs]
What'd you say?
I think I said something along
the lines of you were right,
and it was crooked.
There we go.
How's that?
-It's much better.
-What? I said you were right.
-I know.
-[toolbox clatters]
-[body thuds]
[Leah grunts]
[Mason laughs]
You okay?
-Yeah, are you okay?
-Yeah, I'm good.
I'm so sorry.
That's okay.
[Leah laughs, Leah sighs]
-I did try to get you up.
-Yeah, you did try.
You're clumsy, though.
Oh, I am a bit clumsy.
Mm.
[soft piano music]
Mason, I have more dates.
Yeah, right.
-That's right.
-It's just the dates.
No, it's okay, yeah.
I understand, you gotta
do what you gotta do.
Please, I don't, I don't
want you to be mad, okay?
I'm not, no, I'm not.
I'm not.
I'm really not.
-It's okay.
-Please, I'm...
I'm really just trying to get
through these dates, and, uh,
I'm trying to figure it out.
-I know.
-Trying to commit to it.
Yeah.
It's good. No, you should.
-Right.
-It's okay.
It's okay.
Okay.
I should get going.
-It's all good.
-Okay.
So, you're on the floor
Shook to the core
'Cause I know you care
'Cause I was there
What am I doing?
I saw your eyes
[envelopes rustling]
Hey, it was really great
to meet you, I'm headed out.
Oh, Mason,
before you get away,
I have a little something
for ya.
Oh, um, Gigi, I--
Listen...
Leah's wasted a lot of time
on a lot of jackasses.
And you, my dear,
are not a jackass.
[chuckles]
Thank you. [chuckles]
And thank you for this.
I hope you come.
Hope so too.
[footsteps receding]
[door opens]
A handsome man has just
stepped out the door.
Yeah, yeah, no, I know.
Plenty of fish in the sea,
as mom would say, right?
I thought we weren't
talking about her anymore.
Yeah, but I really don't
wanna be like my mom, Gigi.
I think I might have screwed
up with her a little bit.
I don't know.
Maybe I was too harsh, or...
little of this, little of that.
But you know,
all any of us can do is
just to try as best we can.
[soft melancholic music]
But I think
I got it right with you.
You think?
[Leah sniffles]
Even though I almost burnt
the porch down that one time?
Baby, you could've
burnt the whole house down,
and I'd still love you.
Thank you.
[keyboard clacking]
-Hey.
-Hey.
Hi, sorry, wait.
[Leah clears throat]
I, uh, I got you something.
It's a bomb!
-Whoa.
-Surprise!
-Thank you.
-Yeah.
I also wanted to say that
I am sorry for the other day.
You could have just texted.
Yeah, no, no, I could have,
I could have just texted,
but a bomb is way more fun.
So much more fun.
-Yeah.
-Yeah, entirely.
I'm also really sorry
for not wrapping it.
It is wrapped, it's in a box.
-Sure, yeah.
-It's perfect.
-Okay.
-Thank you.
Well, you should go work.
-Gotta go work.
-Yeah.
-[camera mechanism whirs]
-[soft beat music]
-You got this.
-Grip, step, step.
Grip, step, step.
Grip, step, step.
Grip, step, step.
Yes.
[Leah shrieks]
-Okay, okay.
-Grip, step, step.
Yeah.
-Let's go, let's go, yeah!
-[all applaud]
-[Leah laughs]
-[all cheer and applaud]
[Bianca laughs]
Oh my gosh.
[all cheer and applaud]
Oh, wow, I'm so high.
I'm so high.
-Oh my God!
-Holy shit, how do I get down?
What do I, wait, what do I do?
-Slide down.
-Okay, okay.
Just slide down.
-Okay.
-Yeah.
-Yes.
-Just what?
Fall down?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
No, no, no, hold on, hold on.
-I'm coming down.
-Like a waterfall.
Okay.
-You need to slide.
-Slide, slide down.
-Slide down, okay?
-Okay.
-Yes.
-Okay.
-Okay.
-Yeah.
-Yes.
-You got it.
Yes.
Okay.
[all cheer and applaud]
Oh my God.
Oh, oh.
You don't look so good.
Oh, no. Oh.
Oh God, oh.
I'm totally fine.
No, no, no, no,
she's not, she's not okay.
Oh.
[Leah heaving]
Oh.
I'm not gonna scream.
I'm gonna walk away slowly
and cry in my car.
Okay, okay.
[soft beat music]
[soft melancholic music]
-Hey, Mason.
-Uh, hey, um...
Have you seen Leah?
Oh.
I'm sorry I have
to tell you this.
What happened?
It was a long
night for all of us.
Bianca, please,
just tell me what happened.
She's at Gigi's.
She's at Gigi's?
Yeah, she got some really
gnarly food poisoning.
You made that sound
so much worse than it was.
I know.
-Oh, you did that on purpose?
-Mm-hmm.
-You're funny.
-Yeah.
Wow, you got me. Um...
Why aren't you with her?
Because I don't
do well with vomit.
Okay.
But she's accepting visitors
if you wanna cheer her up.
Good to know.
-Okay, I'll see you later.
-Thank you.
Mm-hmm.
[birds chirping]
[Mason knocks]
[soft percussive music]
Ah, crap! [chuckles]
-Hi, there.
-Hey.
How can I help you?
I heard there's
a sick girl here.
Yeah, yeah, she and Gigi
have seen better days.
My grandpa's here
helping out as well.
Very kind. Um...
If you could just
give this to her.
That'd be great.
It's an inside joke, kind of...
It's really sweet.
Yeah.
And if you could let her know
I came by, that'd be great.
Mason.
-Big dog.
-Yeah, that's me.
-All right.
-Yeah.
-Later.
-Later.
-[percussive music continues]
-[door closes]
[footsteps receding]
Hey, how's the patient?
The patient is dead.
Some guy just
brought this over.
Mark or something.
-Mason?
-Yeah, him.
He a coworker?
Um...
No, no, he's number 20.
-Ow.
-Number what?
[Leah laughs]
Gigi and I made a deal,
that I would go on
40 consecutive dates
and prove to her
that love is a sham.
This was a long time ago?
No, this was like a month ago.
So, I was one of your dates?
Mm-hmm.
You were going out
with 39 other guys?
What?
No, no, no, no, no, no, no.
It was more like in a row.
-In a row?
-Yeah.
And trust me, it was not
as easy as it sounds.
No, no, no,
it takes a lot of stamina.
Stamina?
What were you doing
with these guys?
Oh God, what weren't we doing?
I mean it was like
nonstop, you know,
it was like all over the city.
This one guy,
he took me to a church.
I-I-I can't hear any more.
What?
No, don't worry,
we didn't make it inside.
You did it outside of a church?
No, I ran away
once he took the blindfold off.
How else am I
supposed to make rent?
You have a very messed-up
relationship with your family.
Okay, I was just having fun.
With 40 other guys?
Geez, ow, yeah, and?
It's been nice knowing you.
[footsteps receding]
[Leah grunts]
-[plastic crunches]
-[Leah heaving]
[soft guitar music]
[line ringing]
Oh God, Leah.
Hey.
Hi.
You feeling better?
No, but I have a question.
-[Mason] Okay.
-Um...
What was in the bag?
Why?
It suffered a casualty.
Would you just tell me?
I'm curious,
but it was just
bath bombs and stuff.
All the girl stuff
the store could offer.
A bomb for a bomb.
Yeah.
It's funny.
I'm glad you
think so, I did too.
Get some rest.
Text me later.
Okay.
Okay.
Bye.
Okay.
Okay, thank you,
I'll be right there.
What's going on, it's good?
Uh...
Bailey wants to see me.
Okay.
-In her office.
-Good.
-Right now.
-Good, yeah, this is good.
-Yeah.
-[both] That is good, right?
-Yeah, I think it's good.
-Yeah, yeah, good news.
Yeah, no, I don't,
I haven't done anything bad.
-You haven't done anything.
-I don't think I have, I mean...
-No.
-No.
-There, no.
-No?
-No, it's fine.
-You're fine.
Yeah, you're fine, no, no, no.
don't get worried about it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Don't
freak out, don't freak out.
-I don't even know.
-Confidence. Yeah, you're good.
-Okay, stay there.
-Yeah, I'm not going anywhere.
-I'll be right back.
-Good.
-Good vibes, good vibes.
-I'm fine.
Yeah, yeah,
yeah, chill, chill.
[Bianca] I'm easy.
[phone dings]
She loved my designs.
She wants to see
more of my designs.
That's awesome.
Congrats.
-[footsteps receding]
-[soft guitar music]
Congrats, Leah.
Ooh.
[soft guitar music continues]
-[footsteps tapping]
-[indistinct chatter]
Well, what's up?
Look, I wanna give you
a second chance.
A second chance?
You know, I'll admit that
sleeping with 40 other men,
it throws me a little bit.
Jackson?
I've decided to look past that
'cause I see myself
as a very forgiving person.
Jackson, um...
Yeah, not that it's
any of your business,
but I wasn't sleeping
with any of them.
-But you said--
-If you could stop, just stop.
It's not what I said.
It's what you thought of me.
And...
yeah, you don't
really know me.
No, but I want
to get to know you.
You check so many of my boxes.
I'll see you later, Jackson.
So, no?
That's a hell no, baby.
What?
-Oh.
-Oh my God.
-Sorry.
-I'm so sorry.
Oh, hey.
You know, we really
gotta stop doing that.
We're gonna get hurt.
-Yeah, seriously.
[both chuckle]
Did you just crawl out
of the sewer or something?
No, this is-- this is my office.
Yeah, no, that
makes more sense.
-Mason, were things weird--
-Do you remember...
what you said on our first date?
About having a thing?
Oh, yeah, yeah,
yeah, that thing.
Have you found a thing?
I don't think that people
can find a thing in a month.
[chuckles]
So, Jackson is...?
Jackson?
-What?
-No, Mason.
Jackson's not...
in the picture.
-He's not?
-No.
Okay.
Okay.
Um...
Before I met you, I had, like,
a vague idea of what I wanted.
But, Leah, now,
I wake up in the morning,
and you are the first thing
that I think about.
Okay, um...
Mason, we can't.
We can't have this
talk right now.
The dates?
Okay.
I get it.
I get it.
[soft melancholic music]
-[indistinct chatter]
-[footsteps approaching]
He was supposed
to be here at 5:30.
-What time is it now?
-6:00.
Ah.
I think Mama got stood up.
I think you're right.
Tonight was date number 40,
Steven.
Ohh.
You wouldn't wanna?
-To, oh...?
-Yeah.
Well, I have been
waiting for this moment
for the past 39 dates.
-Best date yet.
-[both laugh]
Should we take a picture?
Oh, yes, and I came prepared.
-So, I'm just gonna, yep.
-Oh.
Where has this been?
Special occasions.
-Here we go, ready?
-Of course.
Men of a certain age.
And straight face for grandma.
There we go.
She's gonna want me to date you.
-I'm down.
-What do we do?
-We eat bruschetta.
-[Leah laughs]
And drink copious
amounts of wine.
[Leah laughs]
Deal.
[Host] We'll be right back to
Murders, Murders, Murders.
There she is, my little angel,
home from her 40 dates.
-Hey.
-How you feeling?
A month and a half older.
[Gigi laughs]
Did you cash your check?
No, I lost the bet.
What are you talking about?
You didn't lose the bet.
I didn't find anybody.
I think you might
have lost your mind,
but you didn't lose the bet.
I did, it's okay.
-Leah?
-What?
-Leah?
-What?
Are you blind?
No.
Mason...
-I don't wanna--
-Mason is crazy about you.
Do you not see
how he looks at you?
Do you not know what you look
like when you look at him?
What if you found out that
you could never see him again?
How would you feel then?
He's the keeper, honey.
He's the keeper.
Can I borrow your car?
Mm-hmm.
Sure.
-Okay, okay, okay.
-Yeah, hurry up.
Oh, shoot, I think I might
have forgotten to plug it in.
-What, again?
-I'm old, okay? I forgot.
Just make a run for it.
I love you, thank you.
I love you.
I look fine, right?
Go!
[door closes]
Don't want to have
To say goodbye for the night
This feeling is so heavy
And it takes a bite
At my heart that you're
Holding with your left hand
And I can't understand
If we are breakin' up
We go where no one
Knows where we go
[Leah panting and coughing]
God. [panting]
The anxiety is killin' you
Oh, sorry, sorry,
sorry, excuse me, sorry.
But we can't go deep
Hi, sorry.
In the in-between
We're holding on to
[Leah panting]
Oh God, oh God, oh God, okay.
Okay, I can do this.
[Leah knocks]
Mason?
[Leah knocks]
Come on, I know you're awake.
Please. [panting]
Okay, look, um...
God, if you could,
if you could just please
just let me in, okay?
I would really like to see you.
And talk to you.
And, uh...
I also totally get it
if you don't want that.
And that's so valid. But I...
Are you out of breath?
Yeah.
Why? [chuckles]
I can tell you about it
if you let me in.
[door opens]
Hi.
Hello.
-Come in.
-[footsteps approaching]
Okay, uh...
[panting]
I um, I lied.
I lied the other day,
and I shouldn't have.
I shouldn't have done that,
and I hate that I did.
And I know that I...
that I have screwed up.
A couple of times. Um...
[panting]
Do you have water?
-Water? Yeah, I have water.
-Yeah, yeah.
-That would be great.
-Yeah.
You kind of live far away.
-Here.
-Okay.
-Yeah.
-Mm-hmm. Mm.
-Mm.
-Mm-hmm.
Wow, it's really good.
-Really good, yeah.
-Really good water.
Okay, um.
Okay.
Okay.
Here's the deal. I, uh...
-I really liked our date.
-Yeah, okay.
No, don't laugh, I mean...
I'm being really
serious right now, okay?
I really liked it.
And then...
And then you come,
here you are, you know,
you're walking on in to...
to work,
and my stomach does like
this really weird thing
that I've like never,
like I've never felt before.
And, um,
you know what I've realized?
I've realized
that I don't think,
like, at all, when I'm with you.
I just... I kind of exist.
And oh, okay, yeah, I'm done.
And then I...
I just kind of melt.
And look, Mason,
I know that it's...
Um... I know that it
sounds like an excuse,
but I... I don't know,
I think I've just been so
terrified of this feeling,
the truth is I, I'm just
scared of it stopping.
And, um, God... um...
[soft pensive music]
So, I guess, I'm trying
to say that I wanna go on...
Oh, God, I wanna go
on a date with you
and have it not be for,
like, a bet.
That's, yeah, that's all.
That's why I've run here to you.
[soft piano music]
God, why didn't
you do that sooner?
-Oh, shut up.
-Well, you should have tried
-like to move me or something.
-I tried.
What do you think?
I mean, this is silly.
[laughs]
-This is like all mine?
-Yeah.
Like forever?
They're not gonna take it down?
Unless you get fired.
That won't happen.
Wait, do I have
to call you boss?
-No, ew, weird.
-Okay.
Look at me. Me.
Leah Jones, junior designer.
Promoted looks
really good on you.
Hey, I'm proud of you.
Thanks, B.
I'm proud of you.
Okay, you've got...
What's going on with you?
-Me?
-You've got some like--
I don't know,
I'm like totally normal.
Oh my God.
Did you?
I don't know, maybe.
Who knows?
I don't know, but...
Congratulations.
Yes, a pleasure, thank you
so much. Make an appointment.
-Anytime.
-Anytime.
In my office.
-See me in my office.
-I'll see you in my office.
Oh, okay.
Hi. [laughs]
[footsteps receding]
-Okay.
-This is the perfect cake.
[Leah] I know.
-Good choice.
-Kind of killed it.
Yeah.
-Can you fix my hair?
-Okay, oh, yeah.
-Wow, kind of sexy.
-You look great.
-I know, let's go in.
-Let's talk about that later.
Okay.
-Hey, now.
-What?
[indistinct chatter]
-[all cheer]
-Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday to you
Happy birthday, dear Gigi
Happy birthday to you
[all cheer and applaud]
Make a wish, make a wish.
[all cheer and applaud]
[soft guitar music]
[soft guitar music ends]
Okay, um,
what is your purgatory?
What do you mean?
Well, you know, like
mine's being trapped in,
like, an elevator with, like,
endless Christmas music playing.
Okay, okay, I'm on board, um...
stuck upside down
on a roller coaster.
Yeah, no, that'd be terrible.
-Right?
-Yeah, really bad.
Awful.
Okay, your idea of heaven?
Endless tacos and no traffic.
Yeah, agreed.
You?
Thunderstorms.
But like, on command.
-Oh, nice, just like...
-Like I'm commanding them.
Yeah.
Just like heaven, nice, okay.
Okay, you should know this:
I have a fear of ants.
-Okay.
-I don't like 'em.
-It's good to know.
-Mm-hmm.
For me, it's clowns.
-What the hell?
-I lied to you.
-I knew it.
-[both laugh]
-I freaking knew that.
-I totally did.
I totally lied to you.
Sorry about that.
That's okay.
-Allergies?
-Douchebags.
-Naturally.
-Mm-hmm.
Dating apps?
Deleted.
Weeks ago.
-Nice. [laughs]
-[camera lens shutters]
You're contagious
Never seen nobody
Move so dangerous
And the fact is I ain't
Never gonna shake this
Oh no, no, oh no, no, no
I'm getting sick of like
A love temptations
So fair like the juice
I'm craving
And the fact is
You're a little contagious
Oh no, no, oh, no, no, no
Moving sweet and sultry
If I may
I'm moving in
I got the diagnosis
Doc says my heart
Is craving
A daily dose for saving
I just wanna be the one
Gotta be the one you call
Wanna be your front mind
Yeah, I need to be
The one you sleep with
The one you wanna be with
The one
You're getting tired
[upbeat dramatic music]