A Light Beneath Their Feet (2015) Movie Script
[music playing]
[LIGHTNING DUST, "DIAMOND"]
MUSIC: Claim to me that
this city's so tired.
Then you fall over laughing
from the late night.
So nothing's promised or
ever guaranteed to last.
Held my breath, but
you're fading fast.
Say it slowly.
You still shine like a diamond.
I felt it through me.
Whisper to me that
you've had enough.
Apologize that
you're not in love.
If it's just the
chemicals in our brains.
Slow, stay.
Everybody seems to
say the same thing.
I was in too deep.
I was over my head.
[sound of pills dropping]
No, no, no, no.
[kettle whistling]
Mom!
Mom!
Mom!
I'm right here.
I thought you
wanted a normal job.
What?
Why be normal when
you can be fabulous?
You might even like this job
better than one at the bakery.
I don't know about that.
Oh, Northwestern,
would you look at that.
So you think Northwestern
can handle a Gerringson girl?
Untamed, uncivilized?
So glad you're staying
close next year.
It's going to be so great.
Yeah.
So you're going to run out
of those little blue pills
next Wednesday when I
go to Dad's, so you're
going to have to get more.
OK?
OK.
Yes, sir.
You know, I can
take care of myself.
I know.
I love you.
I love you.
[music playing]
MUSIC: From another road
you looked in my soul,
lying out the doorway.
Feeling that I would be
writing on the sorrow
when you go to drive away.
[tapping on window]
Hey.
Thank you.
Have the best, OK?
OK I hope you get a
really good job, Mom.
Me, too.
Bye.
[engine starts]
Bye, drive safe.
Careful you might
lose your virginity.
One week before the AP
exam and everyone's reading.
"His needs are from
a place of pain.
Mine from an even darker place.
There is only one position--"
Homemade smut, how retro.
Put it away.
Beth Gerringson, care
to give this one a try?
Less than one.
You're right actually.
Can I go to the bathroom
or-- or somewhere.
The bathroom or
somewhere pass is taken.
You'll have to wait
for Amy to get back.
All right, so if you will
come this way, Gloria.
Hi, Amy.
This is Gloria, one of
our student specialist.
Right here.
Obviously, if you see this is,
of course, our steaming area.
Very dangerous.
Awfully hot.
So be very careful.
All right, so we
step this way please.
Maria and Cindy, this is Gloria.
Hi.
She starts today.
All right, now before I leave
you to your own devices here.
I have just one more
thing I want to explain.
Fourth and fifth periods,
that's our rush time,
so for those two
hours, you can't take
any breaks or what have you.
Now, what is or what have you?
What?
Exactly.
What?
Have you?
What?
Have you.
No.
It's a joke.
Oh Look, they
don't really tell me
much about why you're
in the program.
OK, now I only ask you
this because the last one
we got from your agency, up and
urinated on the floor one day,
so I just need to know,
are you good for this job?
Yes.
Yeah.
OK.
OK.
Good.
Oh, one more thing, health
regs, so no jewelry.
OK.
Got it.
Good.
Make yourself at home.
OK.
I--
[music playing]
I can't hold it.
Thank you for
bringing back the pass.
Don't wet your pants, Beth.
Beth, hi.
Hey, Beth, can you give me
a ride from school today?
OK.
You know I didn't have
a choice, Beth, OK?
I mean, I wanted something
completely different.
But if I turn down jobs, then
you start losing the benefits.
It's all connected.
They check your email.
And that's not paranoia, because
I read that in the Tribune.
So it's like I had to
take what they gave me.
I'm glad you have a job, Mom.
Good news is that there's only
three weeks left of school.
Thank god.
You know I did my
last week of school.
Please, don't gross me out.
Oh, it's so not gross.
Your conception was beautiful.
I was nuts about Paul.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Go, go.
I want to get off my meds.
Why do you want to
go off your meds?
Why do I want to go
off my meds, Gloria?
Hm, so I can feel like myself.
Because I'm really tired of
being down and moving slow.
What would happen if
you went off your meds?
Let's think this through.
I hate when you ask me that.
Well, think it through.
I risk losing Beth again.
Can I read what you wrote
about me in your book, please?
Sure.
Taking care of yourself, hm.
Taking medicine
consistently, yep, check.
Why are you smiling?
You love it when I read out
of this book, don't you?
Hey, it is classic behavior,
which I do find interesting.
Cause you love the crazies.
DR RUTTER: Beth going to college
next door is a catastrophe.
GLORIA: Yeah.
Beth going away will
be a catastrophe.
She won't be doing my meds.
And will she need new clothes.
And she won't be
yelling down the stairs.
She's moving next door.
I know, but then what if
she gets a job after college
far away?
What if she gets married?
GLORIA: Why do I
have to be on my meds
if she's just going to be gone.
Happy 3rd Birthday Elleven?
That can't be right.
That's the name.
11 with two Ls?
It's pronounced Elleven.
Stop making that cake.
Elleven's parents
have to be stopped.
No, no, no--
Hi.
Hey.
Hello, do you want something?
Yeah, just a soda or something.
So just out
roaming the streets?
Just thirsty, man.
Oh, um-- um-- I'm so sorry.
I must have shaken it up.
That's cool.
See ya.
What?
What is that?
Stop that.
What?
It's not how you look.
He's a socio and a weird.
He's just different.
Different?
Beth, he had sex with a teacher.
He was a victim.
It's going to be short.
Why?
Chadworthy, he didn't pay.
Turns out he's also a thief.
We're going to get
fired over a $1.89.
I'm not getting fired.
You're not paying for that.
Yes, I am.
You just bought Jeremy
Chadworthy a drink?
That's great.
Good yellow tail nothing?
Yes.
It tastes like a scrotum.
The word of the day is filicide.
It's the act of killing
one's own parents.
Filicide.
Well, remarkably
patient complaints
of emotional
flatlining on lithium
has led to an increase
in the use of off label
anti-convulsants for
bipolar disorder.
Yes.
Indeed.
There's an argument to be
made that bipolar disorder,
schizophrenia, and
chronic depression
should be treated as
neurological disorders and not
psychiatric ones.
Well, Daschulla, to give these
people to the neurologists
would be to ignore the emotional
toll that these illnesses reap
on the patient.
What about Alzheimer's disease?
I mean, that has huge emotional
components for the patient.
But it's classified as
a neurological disorder.
Those folks really suffer.
And that's just the disease.
Then they have to deal
with the neurologist?
Oh, stop it.
You're terrible.
Hey, my brother
is a neurologist.
And look at the emotional
toll that's had on you.
[music playing]
Sorry, I must
have shaken it up.
[kiss]
I do not like this uniform.
It's going to feel
normal in a few days.
This-- this is going to
feel normal in a few days?
No, it's never going to feel
normal, Beth, because I'm not
supposed to be a lunch lady.
OK?
Just-- just give
it a chance, OK?
Just try-- for me, please?
Hey, listen, I-- I'm not going
to tell any of the students
that I'm you're mom, OK?
OK, but it's not a secret.
But thanks.
Oh.
You look good.
Stop fussing with it.
OK.
All right, bye.
Bye.
Have a good day.
You, too.
Come on, Mom.
Stop.
OK, love you.
I love you.
Drive safely, OK?
OK.
[bell rings]
Any update, Gerringson?
Still deciding.
Will you at least let
me know if you got in?
I got in.
So you're staying local.
Northwestern, very good school.
Yeah, OK, bye.
My bullshit meter is going off.
Dr. Krolly, no offense,
but the only reason
I asked you to write my
rec letter to Northwestern
is because I never
talk in your class,
so I thought you would
write me a bad letter
and I wouldn't get it.
You don't want to
go to Northwestern?
Where do you want to go?
I want to go to UCLA.
California, why?
The weather here
is always changing
and you just never
know what to expect.
But in California it's
always the same except
for very predictable weather
patterns, which you can easily
prepare for.
And that's where I want to live.
Did you get in?
Who doesn't want
you to go to UCLA?
Mom or dad?
Or step mom?
Or two dads or whomever?
They don't even know I applied.
Promise me something.
So I know I made a
little difference today.
What?
When you really want
something, go for it,
even if it only
makes sense to you.
Two tickets to prom.
I want to go to prom.
Usually the guy
buys the ticket.
Like a guy who likes you.
And don't say you're
a lesbian, because we
know who all the lesbians are.
Just give me the
tickets, please.
Who's your date?
We could guess, but we can't--
Because you don't
have a boyfriend.
And we know everyone
who has a boyfriend.
And you don't, so--
Jeremy Chadworthy.
Don't you know about him?
He's damaged.
He slept with his junior
high homeroom teacher.
It was on the news.
And now she's incarcerated
for a long time.
He put his first
girlfriend in jail
He doesn't even
live in Evanston.
He only goes here
because legally he
can't go to the same schools as
her messed up kids since that
would be distracting.
I'm going to prom
with Jeremy Chadworthy.
Get your fresh fruit, out of
the can, right here, right now.
We have cherries,
pineapples, melons.
Hey, bud, how are you today?
I'm OK, I guess.
Just OK, you guess?
Yeah.
Why are you great?
Greatness.
All right, bye.
Ahem.
Are you having an off day?
Am I?
Uh, huh.
I'm fine today.
Yeah?
Yeah.
OK, well, then let's
keep the line moving, OK?
Oh, yeah, absolutely.
Joe, will you help me out here?
Oh, yeah, gotcha.
OK.
[music playing]
MUSIC: You are the
cause and I will run.
Deliver me from fruit cocktail!
It's going to rain.
I can-- I can feel it.
I can feel in my fingertips.
It's going to rain.
It's cloudy and humid, that
means it's going to rain.
No, no, it's not that.
It's-- it's-- oh, it's that
edge of your seat feeling.
You know?
You're like.
You know, like when you know
something is going to happen.
But that's even better
than when it does happen,
because-- what I would
really love right now
would be a storm, a
huge storm with thunder
and just lightning.
Oh, that would be so great.
Wouldn't that be great?
Beth.
Hello?
RESTAURANT WORKER (OVER
INTERCOM): Just a minute.
Damn.
I want to hear song.
It's got to be on this station.
Nope.
You know, I was thinking maybe
I could go just a little bit
further away for school.
No, no, no.
What do you mean no?
I take medication so
I can take care of you.
That's my favorite thing to do.
I don't want to be-- I don't I
don't want to be on medication.
That's like-- that's-- not
being on medication is my other
favorite thing to do besides,
well, after taking care of you.
So what's the point?
You like to do other things.
I do you like to
do other things.
That's right.
You like to do other things
other than take care of me.
I like to sing.
I like to paint.
I-- I-- I'm always happy
when you're around.
But I half the time I'm
so funny from the lithium
that-- I don't know-- I
can't even do any of that.
RESTAURANT WORKER
(OVER INTERCOM):
Sorry about the wait.
What can I get for you?
Can I get a--
Hi.
Can you hear me?
Um-- a super dog.
Hey, why don't we go inside?
I don't want to go inside.
Why would I go inside
when you're here?
OK, come on.
Come on, let's go inside.
No.
Yeah.
No, no, no.
Look how many
people are in there.
We don't need to go inside.
We always in the car.
Why-- why would you want to
go inside when we've always
eaten in the care together?
Why are you changing
everything when
I'm about to have the biggest
change in my life with you--
you leaving to Northwestern.
I mean, you're kidding right?
Right?
See I have a feeling
you're not kidding.
It was just an idea.
So you're staying?
I'm not going to swallow
another pill just knowing
that you're going to leave.
[sighing]
[music playing]
Mom?
[tv in background]
What is it?
Do you approve
an online payment
to Northwestern admissions?
Didn't I send the
payment to UCLA?
That was last week.
This week she's going
to Northwestern.
You said that I could
go wherever I wanted.
You said that I could
make the choice myself.
The choice to go to one school.
Not put deposits in everywhere.
You don't understand,
this is your chance.
You have to create
your own life.
Or she'll-- she'll
take all of it.
Dad, stop.
I'm sorry, it's just
that a few days ago I
thought you were going to UCLA,
even though you didn't tell me,
you were applying.
I know, I'm sorry.
Hey, I like that
you didn't tell me.
Look, I want you to
do what you want.
Leaving her is not the
worst thing you can do.
Leave both deposits.
It's against the rules.
Break the rules
for me, OK, kiddo?
But that's it.
No more-- just
break that one rule.
And then we're good, right.
That's quite a bit of--
OK, but what shape?
What shape?
Tell me?
A heart.
A bigger one.
So much love.
Oops
MUSIC: The whistle blowing,
the command is on the phone.
Oh, my god, Mom, you
got to try a strawberry.
Mm, so good.
I thought of something.
You want to go to
our favorite place?
Maybe.
Maybe?
Maybe.
Please, don't you
need something.
I have no needs.
Come on, Bethie sunshine.
I don't have any needs.
You do actually,
because what's this?
What?
Me, me, me, me.
Stop.
[laughing screams]
Darling.
Yes?
Shoes.
The teal heel.
I will take a right
heel and a left gold.
We can only sell shoes
in pairs, of course.
What?
Well, then we'll take
one of everything.
And you can charge
that to Paul Hutchins.
My one true love who
left me for another.
She's just kidding.
Sort of.
Plus, this.
Thank you.
When you go to
Northwestern, you
can come here in the
afternoons and get
our faces made up like whores.
Mom, you can't say that.
MUSIC: You're my
hand me down Jane.
I'm your warranty.
My mouth on yours too.
Good night.
What's wrong?
I just-- I don't feel good.
You don't?
I know.
It's OK.
It's the lights.
It's just the lights, kid.
They make everybody crazy.
Let's go.
Wouldn't it be easier to
pour the new ones on top?
Yes, but that wouldn't
be proper stock rotation.
Yeah, but I'd be
so much easier.
Shut up, OK.
I'm going to Northwestern.
And that's a good school.
So get off my back.
OK.
Um-- thank you for sharing.
But you'll be around.
That's good.
Um-- I will also be
around seeing as I go
to a school in my living room.
And perhaps I don't
know that many girls,
but I know enough to think
you're one of quality.
And so am I. There's like
all this stuff inside me
that you can't even
imagine and-- I'm not
being-- I'm not being gross.
It's cool stuff.
Like I have a
collection of bottle
caps that tells the history
of the American West.
Hey, can you boil this
down to like one thing?
Um, yeah.
Beth, do you want to see
my bottle cap collection
some time?
That's a real thing?
Yeah.
[bell rings]
Oh, gosh, this guy.
Thirsty?
Don't drink that.
Yeah, but do you
forget to pay for it.
Oh.
Ooh, he's got a lot of
stops on the tambourine tour.
Yeah, but he came back.
That's a sign.
Yeah, a sign that
says, stay away, Beth.
He forgot his change.
Something for the tip jar.
What?
Can you close up?
Me?
In charge?
Yes, you can do it.
[music playing]
Hey!
Hey, wait!
[music playing]
[door squeaks]
[floor squeaking]
MUSIC: I walk in with
my hands on my hips
and a home-made whiskey twist.
I am just what you want, but
I can't tell you what that is.
And I don't plan on nothing'
that you can't fit in bottles.
And that changes how
this all works out.
Hi.
Hey.
Do you want to go
to prom with me?
What?
You and I, we're just-- I
think we're both different.
I mean, we're different
than everyone else.
And-- and I know that
you're complicated
because I'm-- I'm
complicated too.
It's just no one at
this school knows that.
And I already
bought the tickets,
so you don't even have
to pay for anything,
because I already
bought the tickets.
So do you want to go with me?
I don't really go
to school stuff.
But uh-- see you around?
[music playing]
[school bell rings]
[traffic sounds]
Very nice.
Blech.
I--
Here you go.
Leave me alone, bitch.
Hi, I am-- have a prescription.
Gerringson.
Gerringson.
Gerring-- might
still be in the box.
[muttering]
You tried to steal my shampoo.
I saw you try to
take it three times.
I did.
I'm not going to pay for it.
Here they are.
Miss Gerringson.
[phone ringing]
We want to thank you
for this time with Beth.
She has been such a blessing.
And we want to thank you
for this bounty that we are
so excited to share with--
[knocking] so excited to share
with one another and that we
are and each other's lives--
Should I get the door,
or is God going to do it?
Honey.
Is that baby world?
Yeah.
I waited all day.
And they show up at 7:30.
Wow, that's rough.
Hi.
Hello.
Yes, can you just take
that right upstairs.
You can assemble it
in the first bedroom
at the top of the stairs.
Sure thing.
Why is the crib
going in my room?
That's going to
be the baby's room.
But-- why can't it just
go in the guest room?
Because the baby's not a guest.
Plus, Julie's mom is going to
stay with us for a few weeks
when the baby comes.
Right.
So when is this baby coming?
September 1st.
That will be when
you're starting school.
Oh, have you decided between
Northwestern and UCLA?
You told Julie?
I-- uh-- didn't
know it was a secret.
You don't have to
tell her everything.
And no, Julie, I'm not
going to California.
I'm going to stay
right here in Evanston,
where I've been my whole life,
and where I'm going to die.
Well before you die, I think
you owe Julie here an apology.
Sorry.
How is she?
You know how she is?
Yeah, well she's got a
lot going on in her head.
What was she like before?
Before when?
Before she was diagnosed?
OK, just forget it.
Why?
It's just the way you say it.
What?
Diagnosed, it sounds so mean.
She-- she was very excited.
She had all these
ideas and stories.
And then she just started
like doing things.
Her plans-- I didn't
know what was going on.
And then she took you
with her on that trip.
Yeah, but she didn't hurt me.
She just didn't tell
you what she was doing.
So I never understood
what the big deal was.
Well, she got the
help she needs.
So.
Do you think you would still be
with her if she wasn't bipolar.
It would have turned out a lot
easier if it had been the flu.
I think if you
decide to love someone
you can see who they really
are, even if they have problems.
Maybe we've just been looking
at this for way too long.
No, it's good.
It's good.
[cell phone ringing]
Oh, one second, Dad.
Yep.
I totally forgot it's
your night away from home.
But do you think you
could come home tonight?
Maybe go there another night?
Yeah, sure.
GLORIA: Oh, god, it's so good.
I feel so much better.
I went to the pharmacy
tonight and this old lady,
she growled at me,
Beth, like literally.
And then I'm thinking I
want to wear more make up.
I just do.
I want to wear more make up, and
not just on special occasions.
So next time we go to the
mall, can we pick some up?
BETH: OK, so did you
actually get your meds?
No, uh, uh, nope, I
had to get out of there.
BETH: So you went, but you
didn't actually get your meds?
No but I'll.
I'll go next time in the
day, when it's not so scary.
BETH: Go right after your
appointment with Dr. Rutter.
OK,
GLORIA: I will.
What time will you be home?
You know, I really want
to stay here tonight,
like I'm supposed to OK?
OK.
That's fine.
OK.
All right, well, I'll just
go home and make some soup,
and I'll do the laundry.
And yeah, I'll just read a book.
I heard Beth Gerringson thinks
you're taking her to prom.
Really?
Are you?
I don't go to school stuff.
OK.
Well, I'm just saying
it because she only
wants to take you because
it's controversial.
Yeah, you're probably right.
I know some stuff about Beth.
When she was five,
her mom kidnapped her.
What?
She took her to the Grand
Canyon via Greyhound.
Didn't bother telling
anyone about her big idea,
because she thought that
no one would understand.
The police had to pick
them up in Colorado.
And then they dropped her
off in the state hospital
for a long time.
What's wrong with her?
She is bipolar type 1 with a
history of psychosis, paranoia,
and an anxiety
disorder for a chaser.
That's a lot of stuff.
Yeah, she was like my dad's
favorite little project.
He rescued her
from the loony bin.
She even got custody
back when Beth was 12.
My dad's testimony at her
trial is what sealed the deal.
The irony of him judging
her fit for parenthood.
[door squeaks open]
Hey.
You know, you fuck
like a man, but you
giggle like a little boy.
What?
I got to go.
What?
Why?
Why are you leaving?
[music playing]
Is that why you didn't
want to go to prom?
Because of Daschulla?
It's more like the people at
school don't really like me,
because of some
stuff that happened.
That stuff with your teacher.
I-- I'm sorry.
It wasn't your fault.
And it shouldn't
define the rest of your life.
Let's swing.
[music playing]
Want to jump?
Yeah.
Ready?
One.
Two.
Three.
Three.
[laughter]
[music playing]
What do you see
after Evanston High?
I can't believe I'm going to
be older than I am right now.
It's blank.
A house?
Kids?
Anything?
You want kids?
I take care of my mom.
That's enough.
Yeah.
Close your eyes.
This is what I want.
This is what I think about.
I wish that the sun
was inside of the Earth
so that the sun would come
from within the ground.
And it would be
warm all the time.
And there would never be night.
There'd be no darkness.
Our feet would always be warm.
[music playing]
[laughter]
Well, I got to go.
Yeah.
[music playing]
Mom.
Mom.
Mom.
Hey.
I think-- I think
I might be in love.
I'm so going to
get my meds today,
because I got a feeling--
I feel like I need my meds,
because I have that excited
feeling where I feel
like something's
going to happen,
but then it happens, but then
you're there experiencing it.
OK, great.
Did you here me?
I think I might like a guy.
You have a boyfriend?
Well, I mean maybe.
Really?
Maybe.
Who?
Jeremy Chadworthy.
Jeremy Chadworthy.
Mm.
You missed your blue pill
last night and this morning.
You go to go to the
pharmacy before work.
Oh, there's no time.
There's no time for that.
OK, fine, but i you start
to feel weird, call me.
Or even just leave work
and go to the pharmacy.
OK.
Good plan.
That's solid.
Solid, solid, solid plan.
[music playing]
Ahem, let's stick to the
recommended allowance.
All right?
Oh, OK.
I'll be more sparing
with my cream.
MUSIC: The song may swoon when
the spring brings the sound.
I'll finally sleep.
I'll finally feel better
when the winter's come,
feel better when the
winter's come I feel
better when the winter's come.
Jeremy!
Jeremy!
GLORIA: You guys know that
I have a daughter that
goes to this school?
Oh, you have a daughter here.
.
Yes.
And she's going to be going
to Northwestern next year.
That is a very good school.
Yeah, I know.
That's what I tell here.
Do you guys have kids?
Two boys.
Yeah, I'm just
going to miss when
she-- uh-- she has this
thing when she gets tired
and she pulls on her ear.
She's done it ever since
she was a little girl.
And I remember because--
well, I lost her at one time.
But I got her back.
Hey.
Man, yeah, I'm going
to miss her a lot.
It's very hard.
You think so?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Hey, were you talking
to your boyfriend?
So, Beth, so I'm thinking
after my therapy,
I'm going to walk
to the pharmacy.
Because that's the best plan.
What do you think?
Were you talking
to your boyfriend?
Get in the car, please.
Can you just watch your
feet a little bit for me.
Yes.
And I'm thinking it would be
better to sit right like that.
That looks so good.
This is-- yep.
Looking at you, the brain.
And I'm thinking,
so that way you
can see your patients' better
when we talk, more light.
Yeah.
How do I look?
Now you can see me.
This is just what I needed.
I'm concerned you may be
experiencing some breakthrough
mania.
Trade seats with me.
Let's talk about increasing
your olanzapine and clonazepam
and lithium.
Yes, let's.
Because when you're on lithium
you can't have any more kid,
so when one grows up
and they leave you,
you're shit outta of luck.
Lithium, it's great.
Our priority is to
contain the mania.
I know because I'm
just a lunch lady
and you're the boss, applesauce.
Gloria.
Yes.
Trade seats with me.
Gloria.
Trade seats with me.
[humming]
Hey, you're not watching.
I'm watching.
Pharmacy.
Doctor.
Patient is Gerringson, Gloria.
Rutter.
DA number is 6552502.
Increase by 300 mg per day.
900 in the morning.
GLORIA: I think a
storm is coming.
I really do.
Do you feel it?
Yeah.
What-- whoa.
Come feel it.
So you'll take
the higher doses.
And we'll see how you
feel in a few days.
Do I have to?
Because I'm right on the edge.
And I feel perfect.
Perfect.
We agreed to stay away
from the edge, right?
We aim for a stable.
Stable?
Yeah, stable.
Well, I better be
getting to the drugstore.
Now that you ruined everything.
All right.
I'll see you every day.
[door buzzes]
Hi.
Mark will take care of you.
Hi.
Hi can I get your
last name, please?
Yes, it's Gerringson.
I was going to get married,
but I got sick instead.
Now, he's having a
baby with his new wife.
And I know about it.
And that's the word,
words, words, words.
So Gerringson then?
Yes.
New meds.
New everything.
[phone ringing]
Pharmacist.
WOMAN (ON PHONE): Patient
is Gloria Gerringson.
Gerringson?
Yeah, I have her right here.
X55 35GLH.
So you're canceling
the previous--
WOMAN (ON PHONE): Yes,
and replace it with--
Look, at these.
You're a pill.
Hey, hey, hey,
you're a pill too.
Has the patient been
counseled about this?
Yes, she's been informed.
[laughter]
What is this?
This is great.
Miss Gerringson,
your new medications
were just called in.
Have you taken them
before, because it's best
to take them with food.
Yeah, yeah, I
know all about it.
Everything's changing.
It's changing.
But it's all for my own good.
So I know.
I know.
OK, well, it's going
to be a few minutes.
You're welcome to wait
over there if you like.
OK.
You guys have those chairs
that spin around really fast?
[music playing]
Mark.
Sh-- sorry about that?
Are they ready?
They're ready.
Hey, you're
criminal acquaintance
is loitering outside
the door of this family
friendly establishment.
If you want to
take care of that.
All right, we'll finish
this later I guess.
Hey.
Sorry, I blew you
off at school today.
Oh, it's OK, really.
Do you want to
like go somewhere?
Drive some place?
Did you tell some people that
we're going to prom together?
It was more like a wish.
I just told the two Amys when
I was getting the tickets.
Was that totally lame?
It feels like everyone
at school is talking.
It's like before,
that whole thing.
I don't like it.
I think we should just
be cool for a while.
So cool.
[music playing]
MUSIC: I won't fall asleep for
fear of a creeping nightmare
a recurring dream where
I'm no longer a child.
I want a life to call
my own, no more learning
through palindromes I'd take
the stars, if they only shone.
I'll meet my makeshift
family beneath the shade
of that willow tree.
And kick my sorrows
as they leave.
In dreaming I see the dust
pile up on unused toys,
while my skeleton
grows and my thoughts
run cohesive and poised.
But wandering calls, and my
eyes will steadily darken.
The chattering walls
will keep me company.
Mom, what are you
doing on the floor?
Look, stars.
I'm so tired.
Not me.
Did you go to the
pharmacy today?
Oh, that silly place
Just please tell me you went.
Please.
Come here with me.
OK.
MUSIC: Of all the
lies to call my own.
I don't see any stars, Mom.
It's just the ceiling.
No, they're stars.
Just see them in your mind.
I don't see any stars, Mom.
There are stars.
MUSIC: It keeps my
child away from me.
Wake me up so that I can leave.
[hallway chatter]
That's girl.
[music playing]
How many kids go
to the school here?
Um-- 3,000.
3,000 that is a lot.
Gloria, you have to
pace yourself sweetie.
3,000 3,000, huh?
[whispering]
[rapid breathing]
Beth.
Beth.
Everyone know.
I just wanted to
take you to prom.
I just thought that if
I bought the tickets
it would just come true.
And I just want to be
normal for one night.
Let's-- uh-- let's go to prom.
Yes, fruit cocktail.
Here you go.
Why?
You know I'm actually
really pretty under here.
It's just my uniform.
You know it's not me, right?
The gals know, right, gals?
It isn't-- this isn't me.
You guys know.
You guys all know.
Yeah, go ahead take one.
Gloria.
Hey.
Hey what seems to
be the trouble here?
Fruit cocktail is so
colorful far right.
So what I tried to do
is I-- I-- took it.
And I wanted to put it
right in the center.
So it just-- it just stood
out like a star, you know.
And be seen.
So it's not taken for
granted any more, you know.
Like do you-- do you
know what I mean?
Yes.
Truly?
Yes.
Yes.
Gloria, are you OK?
I'm trying to be OK?
Why don't you go home.
And do whatever you need
to do come back tomorrow.
And we'll put you on meats.
Meats?
Meats, yeah.
[hallway chatter]
Hi.
How are you?
I think I have mail for you.
Ooh, the mail's
so pretty today.
I never really thought about
it like that, but I guess it is.
Sometimes you have
to look at things.
Do you know what I mean?
Do ya?
Ma'am, I got a lot of
mail I've got to deliver.
Maybe you should
go inside and rest?
I'll wait out.
Come in with me.
Come on.
I'm a great lay.
We can do it standing
up to our favorite song.
What is out favorite song?
No, no, ma'am.
Come on.
[music playing]
[traffic sounds]
Mom?
[mutters]
BETH: What are you doing?
GLORIA: Organizing mail.
[muttering]
[phone ringing]
No.
It's not cooked yet.
Hello, Dad.
FATHER (ON PHONE): Hey, Beth.
I-- I found but she's
acting weird right now.
You can't trust
anybody right now.
Give me back my
phone, Mom, please.
No, you can't anybody.
They're all out there.
You don't let them get me.
Because the last time
I trusted somebody,
they took you away from me.
Don't trust people.
I know they're out there.
But the pretend not to be.
They're all out there
trying to pull me away.
But-- but-- but-- nope.
These are not your meds, Mom.
You didn't get your meds.
Beth.
There's no locked doors
around here, Beth.
What are you doing in there.
[phone ringing]
Dad?
Hello.
Mom's off her meds.
Beth, stop!
Hello?
[pounding on door]
[music playing]
[tires screech]
Stop!
[music playing]
Let's go.
Don't do that.
Where we going to go?
Dad, we have to look for her?
We have to find her.
Somebody could
hurt her out there.
You have it all mixed up.
She's dangerous like this.
You don't get to
tell me about her.
I live with her.
I take care of her.
My life is her.
That is not what I wanted.
I wanted you to stay with me.
So you can make sure that I
wouldn't turn out like her.
No, no, that is not true.
It is true.
Dad, people don't
have all these choices
that you think everyone has.
You have a choice.
If I stay, I stay for her.
If I go, it's so that you
feel better about leaving her.
[music playing]
If you do see her, just--
[music playing]
MUSIC: That I'll
work for your future
where I want to live in again.
I think we should try
again by Dr. Rutter's.
He things that she's going
to go there again eventually.
What would you be doing today
if you weren't looking for her?
What?
What would your day be like
if it wasn't all about her.
What would you be doing?
I don't know.
Think about it.
I guess I sort of
have a date tonight.
Like a date date?
It's prom.
Prom?
Well, let's-- let's go.
Dad, I-- I can't go.
Well, I think you should go.
With mom still out there.
Beth, you haven't
seen it at it's worse.
I loved her.
I did.
But I needed to leave her.
OK, one, two.
We're going to get it.
Right there.
Chin up.
OK.
Since my mom is sort
of AWOL right now,
would it be all right if we
left the prom a little early?
Sure, I can leave as
soon as we get there.
Can I just try something?
Just one little thing.
You can take it down
if you don't like it.
But I think you're
going to like it a lot.
And, yes, you look beautiful.
Thank you for everything.
Any time.
[dance music playing]
Close your eyes.
What are you doing?
Uh, uh, keep them closed.
Imagine that the sun
is under the floor.
[slow dance song playing]
MUSIC: Singing songs
until the morning.
[dance music playing]
Mom?
[distant laughter]
Mom?
GLORIA: Little
guys, little guys.
Hello, soldiers.
Mom.
Where did you sleep last night?
There's no time for sleep.
Me and Paul.
Mom, you're not on your
medication right now.
They switched it up.
This isn't you right now.
The storm's here.
The storm is here.
Knives.
Just-- just stop, please.
Please stop acting crazy.
Just act like yourself please.
Everything must
remain the same.
There she goes again.
Hiding.
And hiding is lying.
And that's the easy way out.
Everything remains
in it's place.
So I get to die.
What?
The plan.
It's my plan.
Have you always the question.
Have you-- stop.
I can't do this any more.
I can't do this any more.
Just look at me.
I can't take care of you.
I can't do.
I can't do it.
I just can't.
Please look at me.
I'm sorry.
I'm not going to
lie to you any more.
I'm not going to
lie to you any more.
And I know that you're
sick and I hate it.
And I know some day, I
might end up sick too.
But right now, I have
to take of myself.
I'm going to go to California.
OK?
OK?
No, no, no, no, stop.
You--
Help!
Help, we're in the kitchen.
Please.
[music playing]
Do you have any idea
what you did to her?
You did this.
Yeah, OK, I did this.
Right?
My fault. I did nothing.
You made me.
What are you talking about?
Made you run away.
Made you say you
had to live in here
because nobody understood you?
Huh?
Made you look like this?
What was I supposed to do?
You didn't do anything.
[distant siren]
Hey.
Hey.
I don't have to
wear these for long.
It's just regulation.
GLORIA: How are you?
Beth, talk to me.
Want to come in?
Let me look at you.
What are you doing?
Taking these stupid
things off of you.
Stop it.
You're going to get in trouble.
Thank you.
I'm really sorry, Beth.
I'm really sorry that I made you
sit in the car all those times.
That wasn't right.
I just tried to keep
you all to myself.
I know you did, Mom.
[music playing]
Mom.
What?
Look at me.
You are my favorite person.
You're my favorite person, too.
[music playing]
I love you.
And I love you.
[music playing]
MUSIC: Raise up my voice.
Into the night.
It is surely not yours.
Yet somehow not mine.
We are alive with
our Lazarus lives.
For our souls to find with
no hope in sight Maybe, baby,
you come back to life.
Would you walk with me?
Walk with me through
the shadow of death.
Would you love me?
You're all I have left.
Find my heart buried
deep in my chest.
And come back to life.
Come back, come back.
Maybe baby, you
come back to life.
Maybe baby, you
come back to life.
Maybe, baby, maybe baby, maybe
baby, you come back to life.
[LIGHTNING DUST, "DIAMOND"]
MUSIC: Claim to me that
this city's so tired.
Then you fall over laughing
from the late night.
So nothing's promised or
ever guaranteed to last.
Held my breath, but
you're fading fast.
Say it slowly.
You still shine like a diamond.
I felt it through me.
Whisper to me that
you've had enough.
Apologize that
you're not in love.
If it's just the
chemicals in our brains.
Slow, stay.
Everybody seems to
say the same thing.
I was in too deep.
I was over my head.
[sound of pills dropping]
No, no, no, no.
[kettle whistling]
Mom!
Mom!
Mom!
I'm right here.
I thought you
wanted a normal job.
What?
Why be normal when
you can be fabulous?
You might even like this job
better than one at the bakery.
I don't know about that.
Oh, Northwestern,
would you look at that.
So you think Northwestern
can handle a Gerringson girl?
Untamed, uncivilized?
So glad you're staying
close next year.
It's going to be so great.
Yeah.
So you're going to run out
of those little blue pills
next Wednesday when I
go to Dad's, so you're
going to have to get more.
OK?
OK.
Yes, sir.
You know, I can
take care of myself.
I know.
I love you.
I love you.
[music playing]
MUSIC: From another road
you looked in my soul,
lying out the doorway.
Feeling that I would be
writing on the sorrow
when you go to drive away.
[tapping on window]
Hey.
Thank you.
Have the best, OK?
OK I hope you get a
really good job, Mom.
Me, too.
Bye.
[engine starts]
Bye, drive safe.
Careful you might
lose your virginity.
One week before the AP
exam and everyone's reading.
"His needs are from
a place of pain.
Mine from an even darker place.
There is only one position--"
Homemade smut, how retro.
Put it away.
Beth Gerringson, care
to give this one a try?
Less than one.
You're right actually.
Can I go to the bathroom
or-- or somewhere.
The bathroom or
somewhere pass is taken.
You'll have to wait
for Amy to get back.
All right, so if you will
come this way, Gloria.
Hi, Amy.
This is Gloria, one of
our student specialist.
Right here.
Obviously, if you see this is,
of course, our steaming area.
Very dangerous.
Awfully hot.
So be very careful.
All right, so we
step this way please.
Maria and Cindy, this is Gloria.
Hi.
She starts today.
All right, now before I leave
you to your own devices here.
I have just one more
thing I want to explain.
Fourth and fifth periods,
that's our rush time,
so for those two
hours, you can't take
any breaks or what have you.
Now, what is or what have you?
What?
Exactly.
What?
Have you?
What?
Have you.
No.
It's a joke.
Oh Look, they
don't really tell me
much about why you're
in the program.
OK, now I only ask you
this because the last one
we got from your agency, up and
urinated on the floor one day,
so I just need to know,
are you good for this job?
Yes.
Yeah.
OK.
OK.
Good.
Oh, one more thing, health
regs, so no jewelry.
OK.
Got it.
Good.
Make yourself at home.
OK.
I--
[music playing]
I can't hold it.
Thank you for
bringing back the pass.
Don't wet your pants, Beth.
Beth, hi.
Hey, Beth, can you give me
a ride from school today?
OK.
You know I didn't have
a choice, Beth, OK?
I mean, I wanted something
completely different.
But if I turn down jobs, then
you start losing the benefits.
It's all connected.
They check your email.
And that's not paranoia, because
I read that in the Tribune.
So it's like I had to
take what they gave me.
I'm glad you have a job, Mom.
Good news is that there's only
three weeks left of school.
Thank god.
You know I did my
last week of school.
Please, don't gross me out.
Oh, it's so not gross.
Your conception was beautiful.
I was nuts about Paul.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Go, go.
I want to get off my meds.
Why do you want to
go off your meds?
Why do I want to go
off my meds, Gloria?
Hm, so I can feel like myself.
Because I'm really tired of
being down and moving slow.
What would happen if
you went off your meds?
Let's think this through.
I hate when you ask me that.
Well, think it through.
I risk losing Beth again.
Can I read what you wrote
about me in your book, please?
Sure.
Taking care of yourself, hm.
Taking medicine
consistently, yep, check.
Why are you smiling?
You love it when I read out
of this book, don't you?
Hey, it is classic behavior,
which I do find interesting.
Cause you love the crazies.
DR RUTTER: Beth going to college
next door is a catastrophe.
GLORIA: Yeah.
Beth going away will
be a catastrophe.
She won't be doing my meds.
And will she need new clothes.
And she won't be
yelling down the stairs.
She's moving next door.
I know, but then what if
she gets a job after college
far away?
What if she gets married?
GLORIA: Why do I
have to be on my meds
if she's just going to be gone.
Happy 3rd Birthday Elleven?
That can't be right.
That's the name.
11 with two Ls?
It's pronounced Elleven.
Stop making that cake.
Elleven's parents
have to be stopped.
No, no, no--
Hi.
Hey.
Hello, do you want something?
Yeah, just a soda or something.
So just out
roaming the streets?
Just thirsty, man.
Oh, um-- um-- I'm so sorry.
I must have shaken it up.
That's cool.
See ya.
What?
What is that?
Stop that.
What?
It's not how you look.
He's a socio and a weird.
He's just different.
Different?
Beth, he had sex with a teacher.
He was a victim.
It's going to be short.
Why?
Chadworthy, he didn't pay.
Turns out he's also a thief.
We're going to get
fired over a $1.89.
I'm not getting fired.
You're not paying for that.
Yes, I am.
You just bought Jeremy
Chadworthy a drink?
That's great.
Good yellow tail nothing?
Yes.
It tastes like a scrotum.
The word of the day is filicide.
It's the act of killing
one's own parents.
Filicide.
Well, remarkably
patient complaints
of emotional
flatlining on lithium
has led to an increase
in the use of off label
anti-convulsants for
bipolar disorder.
Yes.
Indeed.
There's an argument to be
made that bipolar disorder,
schizophrenia, and
chronic depression
should be treated as
neurological disorders and not
psychiatric ones.
Well, Daschulla, to give these
people to the neurologists
would be to ignore the emotional
toll that these illnesses reap
on the patient.
What about Alzheimer's disease?
I mean, that has huge emotional
components for the patient.
But it's classified as
a neurological disorder.
Those folks really suffer.
And that's just the disease.
Then they have to deal
with the neurologist?
Oh, stop it.
You're terrible.
Hey, my brother
is a neurologist.
And look at the emotional
toll that's had on you.
[music playing]
Sorry, I must
have shaken it up.
[kiss]
I do not like this uniform.
It's going to feel
normal in a few days.
This-- this is going to
feel normal in a few days?
No, it's never going to feel
normal, Beth, because I'm not
supposed to be a lunch lady.
OK?
Just-- just give
it a chance, OK?
Just try-- for me, please?
Hey, listen, I-- I'm not going
to tell any of the students
that I'm you're mom, OK?
OK, but it's not a secret.
But thanks.
Oh.
You look good.
Stop fussing with it.
OK.
All right, bye.
Bye.
Have a good day.
You, too.
Come on, Mom.
Stop.
OK, love you.
I love you.
Drive safely, OK?
OK.
[bell rings]
Any update, Gerringson?
Still deciding.
Will you at least let
me know if you got in?
I got in.
So you're staying local.
Northwestern, very good school.
Yeah, OK, bye.
My bullshit meter is going off.
Dr. Krolly, no offense,
but the only reason
I asked you to write my
rec letter to Northwestern
is because I never
talk in your class,
so I thought you would
write me a bad letter
and I wouldn't get it.
You don't want to
go to Northwestern?
Where do you want to go?
I want to go to UCLA.
California, why?
The weather here
is always changing
and you just never
know what to expect.
But in California it's
always the same except
for very predictable weather
patterns, which you can easily
prepare for.
And that's where I want to live.
Did you get in?
Who doesn't want
you to go to UCLA?
Mom or dad?
Or step mom?
Or two dads or whomever?
They don't even know I applied.
Promise me something.
So I know I made a
little difference today.
What?
When you really want
something, go for it,
even if it only
makes sense to you.
Two tickets to prom.
I want to go to prom.
Usually the guy
buys the ticket.
Like a guy who likes you.
And don't say you're
a lesbian, because we
know who all the lesbians are.
Just give me the
tickets, please.
Who's your date?
We could guess, but we can't--
Because you don't
have a boyfriend.
And we know everyone
who has a boyfriend.
And you don't, so--
Jeremy Chadworthy.
Don't you know about him?
He's damaged.
He slept with his junior
high homeroom teacher.
It was on the news.
And now she's incarcerated
for a long time.
He put his first
girlfriend in jail
He doesn't even
live in Evanston.
He only goes here
because legally he
can't go to the same schools as
her messed up kids since that
would be distracting.
I'm going to prom
with Jeremy Chadworthy.
Get your fresh fruit, out of
the can, right here, right now.
We have cherries,
pineapples, melons.
Hey, bud, how are you today?
I'm OK, I guess.
Just OK, you guess?
Yeah.
Why are you great?
Greatness.
All right, bye.
Ahem.
Are you having an off day?
Am I?
Uh, huh.
I'm fine today.
Yeah?
Yeah.
OK, well, then let's
keep the line moving, OK?
Oh, yeah, absolutely.
Joe, will you help me out here?
Oh, yeah, gotcha.
OK.
[music playing]
MUSIC: You are the
cause and I will run.
Deliver me from fruit cocktail!
It's going to rain.
I can-- I can feel it.
I can feel in my fingertips.
It's going to rain.
It's cloudy and humid, that
means it's going to rain.
No, no, it's not that.
It's-- it's-- oh, it's that
edge of your seat feeling.
You know?
You're like.
You know, like when you know
something is going to happen.
But that's even better
than when it does happen,
because-- what I would
really love right now
would be a storm, a
huge storm with thunder
and just lightning.
Oh, that would be so great.
Wouldn't that be great?
Beth.
Hello?
RESTAURANT WORKER (OVER
INTERCOM): Just a minute.
Damn.
I want to hear song.
It's got to be on this station.
Nope.
You know, I was thinking maybe
I could go just a little bit
further away for school.
No, no, no.
What do you mean no?
I take medication so
I can take care of you.
That's my favorite thing to do.
I don't want to be-- I don't I
don't want to be on medication.
That's like-- that's-- not
being on medication is my other
favorite thing to do besides,
well, after taking care of you.
So what's the point?
You like to do other things.
I do you like to
do other things.
That's right.
You like to do other things
other than take care of me.
I like to sing.
I like to paint.
I-- I-- I'm always happy
when you're around.
But I half the time I'm
so funny from the lithium
that-- I don't know-- I
can't even do any of that.
RESTAURANT WORKER
(OVER INTERCOM):
Sorry about the wait.
What can I get for you?
Can I get a--
Hi.
Can you hear me?
Um-- a super dog.
Hey, why don't we go inside?
I don't want to go inside.
Why would I go inside
when you're here?
OK, come on.
Come on, let's go inside.
No.
Yeah.
No, no, no.
Look how many
people are in there.
We don't need to go inside.
We always in the car.
Why-- why would you want to
go inside when we've always
eaten in the care together?
Why are you changing
everything when
I'm about to have the biggest
change in my life with you--
you leaving to Northwestern.
I mean, you're kidding right?
Right?
See I have a feeling
you're not kidding.
It was just an idea.
So you're staying?
I'm not going to swallow
another pill just knowing
that you're going to leave.
[sighing]
[music playing]
Mom?
[tv in background]
What is it?
Do you approve
an online payment
to Northwestern admissions?
Didn't I send the
payment to UCLA?
That was last week.
This week she's going
to Northwestern.
You said that I could
go wherever I wanted.
You said that I could
make the choice myself.
The choice to go to one school.
Not put deposits in everywhere.
You don't understand,
this is your chance.
You have to create
your own life.
Or she'll-- she'll
take all of it.
Dad, stop.
I'm sorry, it's just
that a few days ago I
thought you were going to UCLA,
even though you didn't tell me,
you were applying.
I know, I'm sorry.
Hey, I like that
you didn't tell me.
Look, I want you to
do what you want.
Leaving her is not the
worst thing you can do.
Leave both deposits.
It's against the rules.
Break the rules
for me, OK, kiddo?
But that's it.
No more-- just
break that one rule.
And then we're good, right.
That's quite a bit of--
OK, but what shape?
What shape?
Tell me?
A heart.
A bigger one.
So much love.
Oops
MUSIC: The whistle blowing,
the command is on the phone.
Oh, my god, Mom, you
got to try a strawberry.
Mm, so good.
I thought of something.
You want to go to
our favorite place?
Maybe.
Maybe?
Maybe.
Please, don't you
need something.
I have no needs.
Come on, Bethie sunshine.
I don't have any needs.
You do actually,
because what's this?
What?
Me, me, me, me.
Stop.
[laughing screams]
Darling.
Yes?
Shoes.
The teal heel.
I will take a right
heel and a left gold.
We can only sell shoes
in pairs, of course.
What?
Well, then we'll take
one of everything.
And you can charge
that to Paul Hutchins.
My one true love who
left me for another.
She's just kidding.
Sort of.
Plus, this.
Thank you.
When you go to
Northwestern, you
can come here in the
afternoons and get
our faces made up like whores.
Mom, you can't say that.
MUSIC: You're my
hand me down Jane.
I'm your warranty.
My mouth on yours too.
Good night.
What's wrong?
I just-- I don't feel good.
You don't?
I know.
It's OK.
It's the lights.
It's just the lights, kid.
They make everybody crazy.
Let's go.
Wouldn't it be easier to
pour the new ones on top?
Yes, but that wouldn't
be proper stock rotation.
Yeah, but I'd be
so much easier.
Shut up, OK.
I'm going to Northwestern.
And that's a good school.
So get off my back.
OK.
Um-- thank you for sharing.
But you'll be around.
That's good.
Um-- I will also be
around seeing as I go
to a school in my living room.
And perhaps I don't
know that many girls,
but I know enough to think
you're one of quality.
And so am I. There's like
all this stuff inside me
that you can't even
imagine and-- I'm not
being-- I'm not being gross.
It's cool stuff.
Like I have a
collection of bottle
caps that tells the history
of the American West.
Hey, can you boil this
down to like one thing?
Um, yeah.
Beth, do you want to see
my bottle cap collection
some time?
That's a real thing?
Yeah.
[bell rings]
Oh, gosh, this guy.
Thirsty?
Don't drink that.
Yeah, but do you
forget to pay for it.
Oh.
Ooh, he's got a lot of
stops on the tambourine tour.
Yeah, but he came back.
That's a sign.
Yeah, a sign that
says, stay away, Beth.
He forgot his change.
Something for the tip jar.
What?
Can you close up?
Me?
In charge?
Yes, you can do it.
[music playing]
Hey!
Hey, wait!
[music playing]
[door squeaks]
[floor squeaking]
MUSIC: I walk in with
my hands on my hips
and a home-made whiskey twist.
I am just what you want, but
I can't tell you what that is.
And I don't plan on nothing'
that you can't fit in bottles.
And that changes how
this all works out.
Hi.
Hey.
Do you want to go
to prom with me?
What?
You and I, we're just-- I
think we're both different.
I mean, we're different
than everyone else.
And-- and I know that
you're complicated
because I'm-- I'm
complicated too.
It's just no one at
this school knows that.
And I already
bought the tickets,
so you don't even have
to pay for anything,
because I already
bought the tickets.
So do you want to go with me?
I don't really go
to school stuff.
But uh-- see you around?
[music playing]
[school bell rings]
[traffic sounds]
Very nice.
Blech.
I--
Here you go.
Leave me alone, bitch.
Hi, I am-- have a prescription.
Gerringson.
Gerringson.
Gerring-- might
still be in the box.
[muttering]
You tried to steal my shampoo.
I saw you try to
take it three times.
I did.
I'm not going to pay for it.
Here they are.
Miss Gerringson.
[phone ringing]
We want to thank you
for this time with Beth.
She has been such a blessing.
And we want to thank you
for this bounty that we are
so excited to share with--
[knocking] so excited to share
with one another and that we
are and each other's lives--
Should I get the door,
or is God going to do it?
Honey.
Is that baby world?
Yeah.
I waited all day.
And they show up at 7:30.
Wow, that's rough.
Hi.
Hello.
Yes, can you just take
that right upstairs.
You can assemble it
in the first bedroom
at the top of the stairs.
Sure thing.
Why is the crib
going in my room?
That's going to
be the baby's room.
But-- why can't it just
go in the guest room?
Because the baby's not a guest.
Plus, Julie's mom is going to
stay with us for a few weeks
when the baby comes.
Right.
So when is this baby coming?
September 1st.
That will be when
you're starting school.
Oh, have you decided between
Northwestern and UCLA?
You told Julie?
I-- uh-- didn't
know it was a secret.
You don't have to
tell her everything.
And no, Julie, I'm not
going to California.
I'm going to stay
right here in Evanston,
where I've been my whole life,
and where I'm going to die.
Well before you die, I think
you owe Julie here an apology.
Sorry.
How is she?
You know how she is?
Yeah, well she's got a
lot going on in her head.
What was she like before?
Before when?
Before she was diagnosed?
OK, just forget it.
Why?
It's just the way you say it.
What?
Diagnosed, it sounds so mean.
She-- she was very excited.
She had all these
ideas and stories.
And then she just started
like doing things.
Her plans-- I didn't
know what was going on.
And then she took you
with her on that trip.
Yeah, but she didn't hurt me.
She just didn't tell
you what she was doing.
So I never understood
what the big deal was.
Well, she got the
help she needs.
So.
Do you think you would still be
with her if she wasn't bipolar.
It would have turned out a lot
easier if it had been the flu.
I think if you
decide to love someone
you can see who they really
are, even if they have problems.
Maybe we've just been looking
at this for way too long.
No, it's good.
It's good.
[cell phone ringing]
Oh, one second, Dad.
Yep.
I totally forgot it's
your night away from home.
But do you think you
could come home tonight?
Maybe go there another night?
Yeah, sure.
GLORIA: Oh, god, it's so good.
I feel so much better.
I went to the pharmacy
tonight and this old lady,
she growled at me,
Beth, like literally.
And then I'm thinking I
want to wear more make up.
I just do.
I want to wear more make up, and
not just on special occasions.
So next time we go to the
mall, can we pick some up?
BETH: OK, so did you
actually get your meds?
No, uh, uh, nope, I
had to get out of there.
BETH: So you went, but you
didn't actually get your meds?
No but I'll.
I'll go next time in the
day, when it's not so scary.
BETH: Go right after your
appointment with Dr. Rutter.
OK,
GLORIA: I will.
What time will you be home?
You know, I really want
to stay here tonight,
like I'm supposed to OK?
OK.
That's fine.
OK.
All right, well, I'll just
go home and make some soup,
and I'll do the laundry.
And yeah, I'll just read a book.
I heard Beth Gerringson thinks
you're taking her to prom.
Really?
Are you?
I don't go to school stuff.
OK.
Well, I'm just saying
it because she only
wants to take you because
it's controversial.
Yeah, you're probably right.
I know some stuff about Beth.
When she was five,
her mom kidnapped her.
What?
She took her to the Grand
Canyon via Greyhound.
Didn't bother telling
anyone about her big idea,
because she thought that
no one would understand.
The police had to pick
them up in Colorado.
And then they dropped her
off in the state hospital
for a long time.
What's wrong with her?
She is bipolar type 1 with a
history of psychosis, paranoia,
and an anxiety
disorder for a chaser.
That's a lot of stuff.
Yeah, she was like my dad's
favorite little project.
He rescued her
from the loony bin.
She even got custody
back when Beth was 12.
My dad's testimony at her
trial is what sealed the deal.
The irony of him judging
her fit for parenthood.
[door squeaks open]
Hey.
You know, you fuck
like a man, but you
giggle like a little boy.
What?
I got to go.
What?
Why?
Why are you leaving?
[music playing]
Is that why you didn't
want to go to prom?
Because of Daschulla?
It's more like the people at
school don't really like me,
because of some
stuff that happened.
That stuff with your teacher.
I-- I'm sorry.
It wasn't your fault.
And it shouldn't
define the rest of your life.
Let's swing.
[music playing]
Want to jump?
Yeah.
Ready?
One.
Two.
Three.
Three.
[laughter]
[music playing]
What do you see
after Evanston High?
I can't believe I'm going to
be older than I am right now.
It's blank.
A house?
Kids?
Anything?
You want kids?
I take care of my mom.
That's enough.
Yeah.
Close your eyes.
This is what I want.
This is what I think about.
I wish that the sun
was inside of the Earth
so that the sun would come
from within the ground.
And it would be
warm all the time.
And there would never be night.
There'd be no darkness.
Our feet would always be warm.
[music playing]
[laughter]
Well, I got to go.
Yeah.
[music playing]
Mom.
Mom.
Mom.
Hey.
I think-- I think
I might be in love.
I'm so going to
get my meds today,
because I got a feeling--
I feel like I need my meds,
because I have that excited
feeling where I feel
like something's
going to happen,
but then it happens, but then
you're there experiencing it.
OK, great.
Did you here me?
I think I might like a guy.
You have a boyfriend?
Well, I mean maybe.
Really?
Maybe.
Who?
Jeremy Chadworthy.
Jeremy Chadworthy.
Mm.
You missed your blue pill
last night and this morning.
You go to go to the
pharmacy before work.
Oh, there's no time.
There's no time for that.
OK, fine, but i you start
to feel weird, call me.
Or even just leave work
and go to the pharmacy.
OK.
Good plan.
That's solid.
Solid, solid, solid plan.
[music playing]
Ahem, let's stick to the
recommended allowance.
All right?
Oh, OK.
I'll be more sparing
with my cream.
MUSIC: The song may swoon when
the spring brings the sound.
I'll finally sleep.
I'll finally feel better
when the winter's come,
feel better when the
winter's come I feel
better when the winter's come.
Jeremy!
Jeremy!
GLORIA: You guys know that
I have a daughter that
goes to this school?
Oh, you have a daughter here.
.
Yes.
And she's going to be going
to Northwestern next year.
That is a very good school.
Yeah, I know.
That's what I tell here.
Do you guys have kids?
Two boys.
Yeah, I'm just
going to miss when
she-- uh-- she has this
thing when she gets tired
and she pulls on her ear.
She's done it ever since
she was a little girl.
And I remember because--
well, I lost her at one time.
But I got her back.
Hey.
Man, yeah, I'm going
to miss her a lot.
It's very hard.
You think so?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Hey, were you talking
to your boyfriend?
So, Beth, so I'm thinking
after my therapy,
I'm going to walk
to the pharmacy.
Because that's the best plan.
What do you think?
Were you talking
to your boyfriend?
Get in the car, please.
Can you just watch your
feet a little bit for me.
Yes.
And I'm thinking it would be
better to sit right like that.
That looks so good.
This is-- yep.
Looking at you, the brain.
And I'm thinking,
so that way you
can see your patients' better
when we talk, more light.
Yeah.
How do I look?
Now you can see me.
This is just what I needed.
I'm concerned you may be
experiencing some breakthrough
mania.
Trade seats with me.
Let's talk about increasing
your olanzapine and clonazepam
and lithium.
Yes, let's.
Because when you're on lithium
you can't have any more kid,
so when one grows up
and they leave you,
you're shit outta of luck.
Lithium, it's great.
Our priority is to
contain the mania.
I know because I'm
just a lunch lady
and you're the boss, applesauce.
Gloria.
Yes.
Trade seats with me.
Gloria.
Trade seats with me.
[humming]
Hey, you're not watching.
I'm watching.
Pharmacy.
Doctor.
Patient is Gerringson, Gloria.
Rutter.
DA number is 6552502.
Increase by 300 mg per day.
900 in the morning.
GLORIA: I think a
storm is coming.
I really do.
Do you feel it?
Yeah.
What-- whoa.
Come feel it.
So you'll take
the higher doses.
And we'll see how you
feel in a few days.
Do I have to?
Because I'm right on the edge.
And I feel perfect.
Perfect.
We agreed to stay away
from the edge, right?
We aim for a stable.
Stable?
Yeah, stable.
Well, I better be
getting to the drugstore.
Now that you ruined everything.
All right.
I'll see you every day.
[door buzzes]
Hi.
Mark will take care of you.
Hi.
Hi can I get your
last name, please?
Yes, it's Gerringson.
I was going to get married,
but I got sick instead.
Now, he's having a
baby with his new wife.
And I know about it.
And that's the word,
words, words, words.
So Gerringson then?
Yes.
New meds.
New everything.
[phone ringing]
Pharmacist.
WOMAN (ON PHONE): Patient
is Gloria Gerringson.
Gerringson?
Yeah, I have her right here.
X55 35GLH.
So you're canceling
the previous--
WOMAN (ON PHONE): Yes,
and replace it with--
Look, at these.
You're a pill.
Hey, hey, hey,
you're a pill too.
Has the patient been
counseled about this?
Yes, she's been informed.
[laughter]
What is this?
This is great.
Miss Gerringson,
your new medications
were just called in.
Have you taken them
before, because it's best
to take them with food.
Yeah, yeah, I
know all about it.
Everything's changing.
It's changing.
But it's all for my own good.
So I know.
I know.
OK, well, it's going
to be a few minutes.
You're welcome to wait
over there if you like.
OK.
You guys have those chairs
that spin around really fast?
[music playing]
Mark.
Sh-- sorry about that?
Are they ready?
They're ready.
Hey, you're
criminal acquaintance
is loitering outside
the door of this family
friendly establishment.
If you want to
take care of that.
All right, we'll finish
this later I guess.
Hey.
Sorry, I blew you
off at school today.
Oh, it's OK, really.
Do you want to
like go somewhere?
Drive some place?
Did you tell some people that
we're going to prom together?
It was more like a wish.
I just told the two Amys when
I was getting the tickets.
Was that totally lame?
It feels like everyone
at school is talking.
It's like before,
that whole thing.
I don't like it.
I think we should just
be cool for a while.
So cool.
[music playing]
MUSIC: I won't fall asleep for
fear of a creeping nightmare
a recurring dream where
I'm no longer a child.
I want a life to call
my own, no more learning
through palindromes I'd take
the stars, if they only shone.
I'll meet my makeshift
family beneath the shade
of that willow tree.
And kick my sorrows
as they leave.
In dreaming I see the dust
pile up on unused toys,
while my skeleton
grows and my thoughts
run cohesive and poised.
But wandering calls, and my
eyes will steadily darken.
The chattering walls
will keep me company.
Mom, what are you
doing on the floor?
Look, stars.
I'm so tired.
Not me.
Did you go to the
pharmacy today?
Oh, that silly place
Just please tell me you went.
Please.
Come here with me.
OK.
MUSIC: Of all the
lies to call my own.
I don't see any stars, Mom.
It's just the ceiling.
No, they're stars.
Just see them in your mind.
I don't see any stars, Mom.
There are stars.
MUSIC: It keeps my
child away from me.
Wake me up so that I can leave.
[hallway chatter]
That's girl.
[music playing]
How many kids go
to the school here?
Um-- 3,000.
3,000 that is a lot.
Gloria, you have to
pace yourself sweetie.
3,000 3,000, huh?
[whispering]
[rapid breathing]
Beth.
Beth.
Everyone know.
I just wanted to
take you to prom.
I just thought that if
I bought the tickets
it would just come true.
And I just want to be
normal for one night.
Let's-- uh-- let's go to prom.
Yes, fruit cocktail.
Here you go.
Why?
You know I'm actually
really pretty under here.
It's just my uniform.
You know it's not me, right?
The gals know, right, gals?
It isn't-- this isn't me.
You guys know.
You guys all know.
Yeah, go ahead take one.
Gloria.
Hey.
Hey what seems to
be the trouble here?
Fruit cocktail is so
colorful far right.
So what I tried to do
is I-- I-- took it.
And I wanted to put it
right in the center.
So it just-- it just stood
out like a star, you know.
And be seen.
So it's not taken for
granted any more, you know.
Like do you-- do you
know what I mean?
Yes.
Truly?
Yes.
Yes.
Gloria, are you OK?
I'm trying to be OK?
Why don't you go home.
And do whatever you need
to do come back tomorrow.
And we'll put you on meats.
Meats?
Meats, yeah.
[hallway chatter]
Hi.
How are you?
I think I have mail for you.
Ooh, the mail's
so pretty today.
I never really thought about
it like that, but I guess it is.
Sometimes you have
to look at things.
Do you know what I mean?
Do ya?
Ma'am, I got a lot of
mail I've got to deliver.
Maybe you should
go inside and rest?
I'll wait out.
Come in with me.
Come on.
I'm a great lay.
We can do it standing
up to our favorite song.
What is out favorite song?
No, no, ma'am.
Come on.
[music playing]
[traffic sounds]
Mom?
[mutters]
BETH: What are you doing?
GLORIA: Organizing mail.
[muttering]
[phone ringing]
No.
It's not cooked yet.
Hello, Dad.
FATHER (ON PHONE): Hey, Beth.
I-- I found but she's
acting weird right now.
You can't trust
anybody right now.
Give me back my
phone, Mom, please.
No, you can't anybody.
They're all out there.
You don't let them get me.
Because the last time
I trusted somebody,
they took you away from me.
Don't trust people.
I know they're out there.
But the pretend not to be.
They're all out there
trying to pull me away.
But-- but-- but-- nope.
These are not your meds, Mom.
You didn't get your meds.
Beth.
There's no locked doors
around here, Beth.
What are you doing in there.
[phone ringing]
Dad?
Hello.
Mom's off her meds.
Beth, stop!
Hello?
[pounding on door]
[music playing]
[tires screech]
Stop!
[music playing]
Let's go.
Don't do that.
Where we going to go?
Dad, we have to look for her?
We have to find her.
Somebody could
hurt her out there.
You have it all mixed up.
She's dangerous like this.
You don't get to
tell me about her.
I live with her.
I take care of her.
My life is her.
That is not what I wanted.
I wanted you to stay with me.
So you can make sure that I
wouldn't turn out like her.
No, no, that is not true.
It is true.
Dad, people don't
have all these choices
that you think everyone has.
You have a choice.
If I stay, I stay for her.
If I go, it's so that you
feel better about leaving her.
[music playing]
If you do see her, just--
[music playing]
MUSIC: That I'll
work for your future
where I want to live in again.
I think we should try
again by Dr. Rutter's.
He things that she's going
to go there again eventually.
What would you be doing today
if you weren't looking for her?
What?
What would your day be like
if it wasn't all about her.
What would you be doing?
I don't know.
Think about it.
I guess I sort of
have a date tonight.
Like a date date?
It's prom.
Prom?
Well, let's-- let's go.
Dad, I-- I can't go.
Well, I think you should go.
With mom still out there.
Beth, you haven't
seen it at it's worse.
I loved her.
I did.
But I needed to leave her.
OK, one, two.
We're going to get it.
Right there.
Chin up.
OK.
Since my mom is sort
of AWOL right now,
would it be all right if we
left the prom a little early?
Sure, I can leave as
soon as we get there.
Can I just try something?
Just one little thing.
You can take it down
if you don't like it.
But I think you're
going to like it a lot.
And, yes, you look beautiful.
Thank you for everything.
Any time.
[dance music playing]
Close your eyes.
What are you doing?
Uh, uh, keep them closed.
Imagine that the sun
is under the floor.
[slow dance song playing]
MUSIC: Singing songs
until the morning.
[dance music playing]
Mom?
[distant laughter]
Mom?
GLORIA: Little
guys, little guys.
Hello, soldiers.
Mom.
Where did you sleep last night?
There's no time for sleep.
Me and Paul.
Mom, you're not on your
medication right now.
They switched it up.
This isn't you right now.
The storm's here.
The storm is here.
Knives.
Just-- just stop, please.
Please stop acting crazy.
Just act like yourself please.
Everything must
remain the same.
There she goes again.
Hiding.
And hiding is lying.
And that's the easy way out.
Everything remains
in it's place.
So I get to die.
What?
The plan.
It's my plan.
Have you always the question.
Have you-- stop.
I can't do this any more.
I can't do this any more.
Just look at me.
I can't take care of you.
I can't do.
I can't do it.
I just can't.
Please look at me.
I'm sorry.
I'm not going to
lie to you any more.
I'm not going to
lie to you any more.
And I know that you're
sick and I hate it.
And I know some day, I
might end up sick too.
But right now, I have
to take of myself.
I'm going to go to California.
OK?
OK?
No, no, no, no, stop.
You--
Help!
Help, we're in the kitchen.
Please.
[music playing]
Do you have any idea
what you did to her?
You did this.
Yeah, OK, I did this.
Right?
My fault. I did nothing.
You made me.
What are you talking about?
Made you run away.
Made you say you
had to live in here
because nobody understood you?
Huh?
Made you look like this?
What was I supposed to do?
You didn't do anything.
[distant siren]
Hey.
Hey.
I don't have to
wear these for long.
It's just regulation.
GLORIA: How are you?
Beth, talk to me.
Want to come in?
Let me look at you.
What are you doing?
Taking these stupid
things off of you.
Stop it.
You're going to get in trouble.
Thank you.
I'm really sorry, Beth.
I'm really sorry that I made you
sit in the car all those times.
That wasn't right.
I just tried to keep
you all to myself.
I know you did, Mom.
[music playing]
Mom.
What?
Look at me.
You are my favorite person.
You're my favorite person, too.
[music playing]
I love you.
And I love you.
[music playing]
MUSIC: Raise up my voice.
Into the night.
It is surely not yours.
Yet somehow not mine.
We are alive with
our Lazarus lives.
For our souls to find with
no hope in sight Maybe, baby,
you come back to life.
Would you walk with me?
Walk with me through
the shadow of death.
Would you love me?
You're all I have left.
Find my heart buried
deep in my chest.
And come back to life.
Come back, come back.
Maybe baby, you
come back to life.
Maybe baby, you
come back to life.
Maybe, baby, maybe baby, maybe
baby, you come back to life.