A Very Merry Toy Store (2017) Movie Script

- Candles and carols
And Christmas with you
I'll bring the chocolate
Won't you bring some too?
We'll have sleigh rides
and yuletides
And Christmases white
With candles
And carols tonight
When it's snowing
and blowing
And freezing outside
Bundle up, my darling
Let's go for a ride
There'll be shopping
and stopping
Till nighttime,
and then
It's candles
And carols again
Oh, the fire
Burns brighter each year
Let the love light shine
Hang some mistletoe
And move closer, dear
Christmas kisses
so delicious
Think I'll have another
With my reindeer
and good cheer
And Christmases white
Candles and carols tonight
- Hi. Hi.
- Hey, guys.
It's cold, come on in...
Thank you for coming. Hi.
- How many at DiNova's?
- Two. Including Mr. Finch.
- Al Finch?
- Mm-hmm.
- Huh, he was at the poker game
the other night.
- Oh, yeah? How much did he
take you for?
- What makes you think
I lost?
- Uh, because you played,
Come on, how much?
Eighty bucks?
- Ha! Shows all you know.
Eighty-five, yeah.
So next time,
don't be so smug.
[phone rings]
- Forrester Toys,
where you can pre-order
the all new Princess Alicia
doll and snow castle.
This is Connie speaking.
How may I help you?
No, ma'am.
We won't have the Alicia dolls
until the 12th.
Yes, I'm pretty sure DiNova's
will tell you the same thing.
No, I don't have
their number.
Yes, I believe it's spelled
V, as in "Victory."
Okay. Bye-bye.
Good luck.
Paula, let me get you
that chess set.
[phone rings]
- DiNova Toys,
where you can pre-order
the all new Princess Alicia
doll and snow castle.
This is Will speaking.
How may I help you?
No, ma'am.
Not until the 12th.
Uh-huh. Thank you.
- It's a quad copter.
Great for the indoors,
but I would definitely keep
my Ming vases out of the way.
They're right there
on the shelf.
- Connie, you've got
to help me.
I need a toy
for my boss's daughter.
- What age?
- 7 1/2.
- My Little Pony
Magical Princess.
Twilight Sparkle.
Aisle 2.
- You sure she'll like it?
- You might just make partner.
Oh, hi.
What's your name?
- Eleanor.
- Hi, Eleanor.
You look like a seasoned pilot.
You want to take the controls?
There you go.
Ah, you're doing great.
Just don't lose
the luggage.
- Hi.
- Hey.
- My son's looking for
a skateboard for Christmas,
and I heard about this one
brand, called the Hurricane.
- We carry the Thrasher.
You know it?
Oh, it's a great board.
- Um...
would Forrester's
have the Hurricane?
- They might.
Let's find out.
Just make you get
a top-of-the-line helmet
to go with it,
then your boy should be fine.
- Why would I need
a top-of-the-line helmet?
- Min, where do we keep
that number for Forrester's?
- Why would I need
a top-of-the-line helmet?
- Well, I'm sure you heard
about the recall.
I got it, Min.
We're good.
- What recall?
- Hmm?
- What recall?
- Oh, sometimes the wheels
fly off at high speed.
No big deal.
Hello, Forrester's...?
- Uh, hold it.
Tell me more
about the Thrasher.
- Pie Face.
Is this a game I could play
with my family?
- I've never met
your family, ma'am.
- Randy, I'll take this.
Actually, Pie Face
is a great family game,
and the more people
that play it, the better.
- But are the rules
- No, ma'am not at all.
Very simple.
Just don't forget to pick up
whipped cream on your way home.
- She was asking
good questions, huh?
- Greg, if you're
thinking about
getting that
for your grandson,
you already got him the same
truck for his birthday.
- I did?
- Same color and everything.
- Any other ideas?
- Three words:
LED hand spinner.
Aisle 5.
- He will not be bored.
- Thanks.
- [chuckles]
Hey, sweetie.
How was school?
- Okay.
- Not very convincing, kiddo.
Can you hand me
that penguin, please?
- What's up?
- Marshall Booter.
He says he's sure his bobsled's
going to win this year.
- And what do you say?
- That he's right.
It wins every year.
- Do I have to remind you
that the Cubs won
the World Series last year?
So anything can happen.
- Greetings and salutations.
- Hi, Nana.
- Hi, honey.
- Hey, Mom.
How was the crowd
over at DiNova's?
- No comment.
- Mom!
- Connie, I refuse to feed
this ridiculous obsession
of yours.
- You're not feeding it.
You're just snacking
between meals.
Come on,
talk to me.
- Maybe half this size.
- Yes!
Can I get an amen?
- That is not very neighborly.
Don't encourage her.
- Hey, listen, I have been
swamped with the store.
I don't think I'll be able
to cook dinner tonight.
- I can't either.
Takeout from Joe's?
- Perfect.
- Roast beef and mash?
- With extra gravy.
And pecan pie.
- Forget the pie, kiddo.
We've got ice cream.
And remember,
we are on a budget.
- Okay, I'm on it.
- You want to throw your stuff
in the back and help me?
- Four letters.
A watery conveyance.
Ends with a K.
- Bark.
- [chuckles]
That's what my dog said.
- It's also a boat.
Hath not their bark
been very slow in sail.
- Game of Thrones?
- [laughs]
A Comedy of Errors.
Mr. Shakespeare.
- Hey, it fits.
- Yeah.
- You go to Harvard
or something?
- Morristown High.
You don't need Harvard, Ed.
You just need a library card.
- I am late.
I will see you later, Joe.
- Okay, pal.
- Oh, hey, Pam.
- Hi, Ed.
- Have a good night.
- Have a nice evening.
- Good evening, Pam.
- Hello, Joe.
- My, what do we have here?
Three turkey specials,
one roast beef and gravy.
Sounds good to me.
Francine, we're going to need
four slices of pecan pie.
- Coming right up.
- Oh, Joe, we didn't
order the pie.
- Compliments of the chef, me.
- Oh, you don't
have to do that.
- I changed the recipe.
I want to hear what you think.
Unless, of course,
you hate it.
Then don't tell me.
- That's not likely.
Thank you very much.
- Let me ask you a question.
Are you still giving those
piano lessons
out of your house?
- Every day. Why?
- You got room for
another student?
- Grandchild?
- Not quite.
This one is 68 years old,
but he's very eager
to learn.
What do you think?
Am I too late?
- Well, it's never too late.
But why the sudden interest?
- Uh, it's my niece.
- Your niece.
- Yeah, my niece Tilly,
She's getting married
in six weeks down in Baltimore.
I'd like to be able to play the
Wedding March at her ceremony.
- Six weeks?
Doesn't leave us
much time, does it?
- Is it impossible?
- Not if you work hard.
- So that means
it's impossible.
- [laughs]
- I was afraid of that.
When do we start?
- Call me.
Thanks, Francine.
- Say hi to Randy for me.
- All right, darling.
- Bye.
- Good night, you two.
- Bye-bye.
- I will call you.
- Okay.
- Hello, house.
- Mm, smells good.
- Well, let's hope
it tastes good too,
because this will be our last
takeout for a while.
- Listen, sis,
if money's a problem,
I just got invited to a poker
game at Lou Gallano's place.
- No, Randy. No more poker,
please. I beg you.
- How come?
- Um, because...
I forgot the most delicate way
to say this. You stink at it.
- Connie, if I am
so bad at poker,
how come everybody in town
wants to play it with me?
- Here we go.
- Pecan pie? Mom!
- He didn't
charge us for it.
- Small mercies.
- Still worried
about your loan payment?
- Oh, no more than Dorothy was
worried about the Wicked Witch.
- Connie, level with me.
- Well, if business
stays brisk
and the bank extends
my loan deadline,
then we'll be okay.
But it wouldn't hurt
if DiNova's would
pull up stakes and move
to Alaska this month.
But I'm not
counting on that.
Teej, dinner.
Turn of the TV
and go wash your hands.
- Hey, kids, what store
has all your favorite toys
for Christmas this year?
- Roy's!
- I can't hear you.
- Roy's!
- Still can't hear you.
- Honey, what...?
- Roy's!
- Why are you whispering?
- You have your earmuffs on.
- Oh. I knew that.
- [all laugh]
male announcer:
Roy's Toys.
Largest selection
in New England.
And pre-order the new
Princess Alicia doll
from the hit movi e Moonglow,
on sale December 12th.
- Nervous, Mom?
- The nearest Roy's
is in Hartford.
You know that, honey.
Go wash your hands.
- How many times am I going
to have to buy this house, Ben?
- So, what made you sell it
in the first place?
- Equal distribution
of assets.
I didn't have a choice.
But now I want it back.
I need it back.
I miss it.
- What about Laura?
Do you miss her too?
Ha! What am I saying?
Of course you miss her too.
She's as beautiful
as she was brilliant.
She's as funny as she was--
- Yeah, I get it, Ben.
But this was my family home.
I grew up here.
- That's right.
Well, even for a part-time
that was very impolitic
of me to say.
I'm sorry, Will.
- So, how much to move in?
- Well, I would wave
my commission fee, of course,
but the bank's going to want
at least $80,000 upfront.
- $80,000?
- Yeah.
- All right, well...
that just means I'm gonna have
to have an awesome December.
That's all.
- Oh, my daughter
loves this song.
It's from a movie.
- Moonglow.
- Moonglow. Yes.
- Do you carry the doll?
- Oh, not until next week.
But if you pre-order
the doll,
we will guarantee it
by next Tuesday.
- Great.
- Ho, ho, ho.
What would you like
for Christmas this year?
A what?
A mermaid? All right.
Well, I'll see if I can
talk to your mom
about a little fishy then.
Just ring your bell
on Christmas Eve,
and I'll come visit you.
All right, come over here
and see Santa.
Now, what is your name?
- Angelica.
- Angelica,
what a beautiful name.
What would you like
for Christmas this year, huh?
A kitten?
I think we can probably
do a kitten,
if I put in a good word
with your mom.
We'll see, all right?
So here's a bell.
And ring it on Christmas Eve,
and I'll see what I can do.
Okay. All right, buddy,
hop aboard.
Oh! Now, what would you
like for Christmas this year?
A recorder?
Oh, you're a music man, huh?
Well, here's a little bell.
And on Christmas Eve,
I want you to ring that.
And I'm going to try
to bring a recorder your way.
Now you be real good.
All right.
Oh. Hey, Francine.
What are you doing here?
- Randy, you asked me that
last week
when you bumped into me
at the movies,
and the week before that
at the bowling alley.
- Oh, well, I guess I'm just
a curious guy.
Well, here.
Merry Christmas.
- Oh.
- All right.
All right there.
Hey, what's your name?
- Okay, well,
we will see you on the 12th.
Can I help you find
anything else?
- Thanks. I think I'm just
going to keep browsing.
- Okay.
- Hey, how's DiNova's
up the street?
- I cannot say enough
about it.
- [laughs]
- Thanks.
- Because it drives me crazy.
- And the...
itsy-bitsy spider
Climbed up the spout again
- Hey.
- Okay, that was better, Joe.
But remember,
G-flat is here.
- Yeah, sorry, I got
a little distracted there.
I was worried
about the spider.
- Yes, he certainly was in
a bit of a pickle, wasn't he?
- Yeah, but then sun comes out,
dries everything all...
Everything's normal again.
Yeah, it's pretty convenient
if you ask me.
- Lazy, you mean.
- Yeah.
Like they'd rather just want
to wrap everything up
and get out of there,
you know?
- Well, maybe he had
to go to the bathroom.
- Maybe. I'm sure all that talk
about the rainfall
probably didn't help, huh?
- [both laugh]
- Don't make me laugh
when I'm drinking, Joe.
Pianos are expensive.
- I promise.
- By the way,
what kind of piano
are you practicing on at home?
- I bought this...
this little Brite.
You know, it's cheap.
On Craigslist.
I don't know
what it was called.
It was 60 bucks.
- Just remember, you need
to practice two hours a day
if you want to be ready
for your niece Tilly's wedding.
- Yeah.
- Okay?
- Sure.
- All right, from the top.
- From the top.
From the top.
- The itsy-bitsy spider
Went up the garden spout
- You got to buy this too?
- Why do I have to buy that?
- Because it's open
and I'm drinking it.
- Speaking of theft, Randy,
I noticed some
missing inventory again.
I think I have a shoplifter
on my hands.
- Okay, here's what you do.
Four guys, undercover.
- Four?
- Yeah.
Like one for each corner
of the store.
- Preferably ex-Navy SEALs.
- Navy SEALs, got it.
- Shoplifter comes in for the
five-finger discount, and boom.
You take them out
like the A-Team.
- Okay, you're proposing
I spend
tens of thousands
of dollars
to catch a Play-Doh thief.
- Okay, two guys, ex-FBI.
Now the thing here is--
- Randy, how about we just get
some security cameras, okay?
They're 30 bucks,
over there.
- We can do that.
- Yeah.
- Oh, dude,
business is booming, Jake!
I had to hire
three more people
just to keep up
with traffic this week.
I can't--
Oh, hey, Forrester.
How's it going?
Hey, Jake, listen, man,
I got to go.
But let's have dinner soon,
On me this time.
Merry Christmas.
My buddy Jake.
- So sounds like things
are going good for you, huh?
- What? Oh, man, don't tell me
you just overheard that.
Okay, now I'm embarrassed.
- [laughs]
Well, you should be,
because there is no
cell service in here.
- I'm sorry?
- Yeah, this whole block
is a dead zone.
- Oh, really?
Well, then who was I
just talking to?
- Uh, the only person who finds
you faintly amusing.
- I know plenty of people
who find me amusing.
- Oh, yeah?
How is skid row these days?
- Okay, that was
kind of clever.
- And, of course,
we are pleased as punch
to be bringing our high
quality superior selection
to this part of the state.
- Your grand opening
is on Saturday.
How did you manage
to keep it quiet for so long?
- It wasn't easy,
believe me.
- Back to you, David.
- How could this
have happened, Ben?
- A heads-up would have
been nice, Ben.
- I was blindsided too.
- How'd he build a huge story
in town without anyone
knowing about it?
- He didn't.
He was crafty.
He went through
a second party.
He bought the old Tower Records
just off the highway.
It's been standing empty
for nine years.
- Well, serves us all right
for not buying more records.
- Ben, what are you going
to do about this?
- Well, naturally, Will,
I'm going to wave
my enchanted mayor's wand
seven times
and turn Barnes's
new store into
a big pile
of goose feathers.
- How would that be?
- Sounds good, Mayor.
But I'd keep that wand under
lock and key, because if--
- Joking.
- Unsuccessfully.
But maybe there is
a magic wand we can use.
Come with me.
- You want to tell me
where you're going?
- Less than anything else
in the world.
- She does not mince words.
- County library? Whoa.
Don't get in here much.
What are we looking for?
- Municipal document.
I know I saw it
down here once,
but they have moved
everything around
since I worked here
back in college.
- Oh, I remember
when you took that job.
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
Dad was scared stiff
you'd wind up a librarian
instead of going
into business with him.
Sis, you know I'm not
bitter, right?
About Dad leaving
the store to you
instead of the both
of us?
- Well, I hope not,
I mean, I was there when you
told him you'd rather spend
50 years in the Sahara than
one hour in the toy business.
- Boy, sure took that
literally, didn't he?
- [laughs]
- But, well, I guess
it makes sense.
I mean, you love the store
as much as he did,
and I love crewing
on fishing boats
and giving you a hand
in the off-season, but...
- But?
- [sighs]
Well, it's just
I wanted Dad to be proud of me,
that's all.
- Oh, Randy,
he adored you.
- Well, yeah, but it's not
the same as being proud.
- Ah-ha.
- What?
- Come on down to Roy's Toys.
Roy's got everything you need
for Christmas this year.
- How about
a driver's license?
- Almost everything.
- [all laugh]
- And...cut.
That was great.
Let's go tighter.
Five minutes, everybody.
- Listen, Max,
the kid in the black shirt
over there is walleyed.
It's creeping me out.
- Walleyed?
- Yeah.
I'm afraid you're going
to have to replace him.
- Get a normal kid in there.
- Okay, Roy.
- And do it quietly,
under some sort of pretext.
- I'll think of something.
- Good. Miss Halifax,
what's the good word?
- Problems.
- That's a bad word.
- You need to see this, Roy.
It's from the New Britain
- Are they ready
for the grand opening?
- There may not be
any grand opening, Roy.
- What am I looking at?
- County ordnance someone
dug up from 1948.
Forbids the operation
of any retail establishment
over a certain size.
- Well, what about
Tower Records?
- It was never
enforced before.
- Well, why pick on me?
Why does Tower
get all the breaks?
- Roy, they're bankrupt.
You're worth $2 billion.
Who got the break?
- They did.
- Okay, Roy,
you're getting hysterical.
- You're right.
I'm in a tizzy.
These things throw me
into a tizzy.
I need a field estimate
of my chances.
- Of not being shut down
if you ignore this thing?
25 to 1.
- Get my lawyer
on the phone.
- Which one?
- All of them.
- Okay, your little brother's
going to love this.
- Merry Christmas, Brady.
- Thank you.
- Paper just came.
- Oh, good.
Let me check out
the new coupon.
- Oh, no.
- What's wrong?
Did they forget
the little dotted line
that shows you
where to cut?
Oh, no.
- I know.
I know.
- What happened
to the ordnance?
- Connie, it's like I told
Will DiNova just now.
Barnes's attorney filed
a motion for a waiver.
- Filed a motion with who?
- The Board of Selectmen.
We're voting on it
this month.
But it has to be a simple
That's the good news.
And the board is only me
and two other people.
Shirley Laverson who, granted,
might vote in Barnes's favor.
And my brother-in-law Pete,
who I just gave
my kidney to last year,
who I guarantee you will not.
And I'm certainly
not going to.
- What was--
What's the bad news?
- I beg your pardon?
- Well, you said there was--
That was the good news,
like there was also
some bad news.
What's the bad news?
The vote is on Christmas Eve.
Until then...
- What?
Until then, what?
- Barnes gets to remain open.
- No!
No, that is two weeks away.
That could seriously
damage my business.
- I know. Will DiNova has a lot
to lose too.
- Stop trying
to cheer me up.
[phone rings]
Forrester Toys,
where you can pre-order
the all new Princess Ali--
- Well, good morning, Connie.
Do you need a menu?
- Oh, no, thanks, Joe.
I'm not staying.
- Well, how about
a referee then?
- Toll House cookies.
Help yourself.
What is a toll house
anyway, huh?
- Is that why you asked me
to come down here?
To ask me that?
- No. You going to sit?
Got a proposal for you.
- You're not my type.
- Forrester, my deal will go
a whole lot better
if I don't have
to fight with you.
- Mine won't.
- All right, look,
I know we have a little
history together.
Your dad resented my uncle
for buying his own store
up the street,
and you resented me for
taking it over. I get it.
- Is this going to be
a long story?
- No, I'll cut right
to the end.
- We're drowning.
- I'm not.
- Give me a break.
We're in the same leaky boat,
and you know it.
- Oh, a second ago
we were drowning.
- So I mixed my metaphors
a little. Sue me.
The point is, there's trouble
in River City,
and his name is Roy Barnes.
- I am well aware
of Roy Barnes.
What is it you want exactly?
- An alliance.
You and me.
- I'm sorry?
- Strictly of convenience,
and only for two weeks.
- You mean like working
- Why not? I feel like
Bugs and Daffy
teaming up to fight
Elmer Fudd.
It happened
all the time.
- Bugs never teamed up
with Daffy.
- What? You're cra--
You want a list?
"Rabbit Fire," 1951.
"Rabbit Seasoning," 1952.
- "Rabbit--"
- You know what, DiNova?
I don't care.
- All I'm saying is
we pool our resources.
All we got to do
is keep ourselves alive
until the board votes
to reject Barnes's waiver
on Christmas Eve.
Then we're home free.
- And if they don't
reject it?
- Well, then we're sunk anyway.
But Ben assured me
they will reject it.
I'm sure he told you
the same thing.
So, what do you say?
Temporary partners?
- I'm going to have
to think about it.
- What?
- Have a nice day.
- Are you going
to let me know
before his big grand opening
on Saturday?
Man, she loves
these dramatic exits.
- I know I do.
[phone rings]
- Hello?
Oh, hi, honey.
You coming home?
- Yeah, in a bit.
the sign on the store,
Dad copied the design
from the caf he took you
on your first date,
didn't he?
- Mm-hmm. Brewed Awakenings.
Up in Grandville.
We sat sipping coffee
for more than three hours.
Your dad was so nervous
that half the sugar
ended up in his lap.
- He was crazy
about you, Mom.
- Yes.
He loved me, and you,
and Randy, and TJ,
and that store.
That was his world.
- Pretty great world.
- You want to tell me
what's going on?
- Oh, nothing, Mom.
It's just...
I have this friend.
She lost her dad
four years ago,
and her husband
a year later.
And now she's close
to losing her business.
So she gets to wondering,
what does luck have in store
for me next year?
- Well, Connie,
you tell your friend
that luck can change.
Especially if you make
your own.
- Did you get that
from a fortune cookie?
- Doesn't mean
it's not true.
- I love you, Mom.
I'll be home soon.
- I love you too,
[phone rings]
- Hello?
- DiNova?
I'm in.
- Yes!
Oh, by the way,
I'm Bugs
in this scenario, okay?
You're Daffy.
I'm just kidding.
You can be Bugs
if you want to.
You've already hung up,
haven't you?
All right, then. I...yeah,
I'm going to hang up too.
You might be wondering
what it is I'm doing here,
and what it is
you're doing here,
employees of Forrester Toys
and DiNova Toys.
Well, as of today,
we few, we happy few,
we band of brothers...
- And sisters.
- And sisters...
are co-workers.
Each of our stores
is remaining open,
but we're going to be pooling
our profits, our inventory,
and our marketing plan.
- Which means we're going
to ask all of you to put aside
that burning feeling
of disgust and resentment
that's been haunting
your thoughts
and fueling
your nightmares
for the last several years,
and see if you can work
together as a team.
Do you think
you can do that?
- Yeah. No problem. Easy.
- Sure.
- You can?
- We already get along great.
- You do?
- Connie, I think you might
be projecting here.
I mean, all of us
really like each other.
- We actually hang out
after work.
- Maureen and I have been going
out for almost a year now.
- And Kenny and I are thinking
of eloping next month.
- Oh.
- Congratulations.
- Well, that was awkward.
- If you laugh,
I'll kill you.
[piano being played]
- Okay.
That was, um...
that sounded...
you have been practicing
two hours a day, right?
- Yes, I've been practicing
two hours a day.
three hours a day.
- Oh. Hmm.
- Let me ask you
a question.
I've been looking at this
photograph for weeks now.
One of those guys up there,
he was your husband, wasn't he?
- Yeah. That's Alex
on the right there.
- Ah. A fine-looking man.
- Hmm.
- Grand opening. Nice.
Who's the other fellas?
- Oh, that's Roger DiNova.
- They were partners?
- Yeah, didn't you know?
- I only hit town
a couple of years ago.
What happened?
- Well, Alex and Roger
were best friends in college.
And about five years
after they graduated,
they decided to open
a toy store.
- It was all Dad's idea.
- Connie, do you mind?
I'm giving a piano lesson.
- Actually, you're giving
a history lesson,
and I'd like for it
to be accurate.
- Anyway, since Alex
was the primary investor,
he felt that it should be
his name on the front window.
- Dad sunk every last nickel
he had into that place.
- Roger was okay with that
at first,
but as time went by
and he was working
every bit as hard
as Alex was--
- Ha!
- He decided that his name
should be there too.
- And Alex refused.
- They fell out over it.
And then Roger took out a loan
and opened his own toy store
one block down the road,
mainly out of spite.
- Mainly?
- Connie, do you want to finish
telling the story?
- Oh, I wouldn't dream
of it, Mom.
I love science fiction.
- And they never
made up, huh?
- Funny you should ask, Joe.
Hi, Pam.
TJ let me in.
Uh, sorry.
Probably should have
called first.
For what it's worth, Pam,
my uncle wanted
to visit Alex
every day he was in
the hospital.
But he refused.
- I know.
I'm sorry, Will.
- Okay, let me just say this
for the record.
I hate this story.
- Yeah, me too.
- So, what brings you by,
- Joe, actually.
Francine said
you might be here.
Pancake recipe for tomorrow.
The best you ever tasted.
- It's yours?
- The ex-wife's.
I'm sure she's whipping up a
batch every morning these days
- for Carl.
- Carl?
- The ex-friend.
- I hate all these stories.
- TJ, did you remember
to close the garage?
- No.
- I saw a bobsled
in there.
That yours, TJ?
- Yeah.
- Nice.
Getting ready for the big race
next weekend?
- Oh, you mean the one
I'm going to lose?
- He's been reading
The Power
of Positive Thinking.
- You know, I was supposed to
lose to Mark and Frankie's sled
back in 1987,
but I didn't.
I actually took
first prize.
Maybe later I could
show you how.
- Cool.
- Grand opening.
This isn't even a good opening.
In two hours I've sold exactly
one Mr. Potato Head
and one game of Monopoly.
- Actually, the Mr. Potato Head
just got returned, Roy.
But they took
store credit.
- Where is everybody?
- You're not going
to believe it.
- Oh.
- The princess will be here
Tuesday, Mel.
Hey, I am so sorry.
We are out of the Chase & Go
ball popper,
but I bet DiNova's
up the street will have one.
If I were you
I'd hurry.
how's it going?
- Connie, if I served these
at church, we'd fill every pew.
That heavenly, huh?
Ben, looks like you could use
some more coffee.
- Oh, thank you, Connie.
Hey, you know why
they call coffee "mud"?
- Uh, because it was ground
a few minutes ago?
Old joke, Ben.
- I'm not that old.
- Hey, Eleanor,
you having fun?
- Sorry. I know I'm always
playing with this toy.
- Oh, what do I look like,
the FAA?
Knock yourself out.
- I really wish we could
afford to buy it.
My dad says there's no money
for extras right now.
- Yeah, a lot of that
going around.
- Not bad. Not bad.
- Yeah, I counted 85
just now.
- Yeah, it was almost 70
over at my place.
Well, you were right.
Americans will do
just about anything
for free pancakes.
- I think this guy's
ready to propose.
- Oh.
- What is he doing here?
- So, this is where
all my customers got to.
I wondered.
Connie Forrester, right?
- That's me.
- Roy Barnes.
My associate, Miss Halifax.
Nice to meet you finally.
And nice little shop
you've got here.
- Be it ever so humble.
- We were just in DiNova Toys.
Wall to wall.
Tell him congratulations.
Pancake breakfast.
Hat's off, guys.
Very inspired.
- Mr. Barnes--
- Roy, please.
- Roy.
I have to say, you're being
surprisingly gracious
considering, well...
- I'm the competition?
Why the heck not?
I mean, you two seem
to get along okay, right?
- Peas in a pod.
- See what I mean?
I just figured that's how
things are done around here.
It's kind of refreshing,
right, Miss Halifax?
- Like a mug
of hot cocoa.
- Or a stack of buttermilk
Speaking of which,
do you mind if we...?
- Yeah, follow me.
- The Eliminator?
So tell me, what's
the Eliminator, exactly?
- Sled.
- Bobsled, Mr. H.
Best one in the county.
Tell him how fast
it goes, Boots.
- 42.
- 42 miles an hour, Mr. H.
- Oh, that's not going fast.
That's flying low.
- Right. Hey, Boots,
where should we go to celebrate
after you win
next weekend?
- [laughs]
You guys are feeling
pretty confident, aren't you?
- Well, who's going
to beat him?
- Anything's possible.
Cubs won the World Series
last year.
- [laughs]
- Cubs weren't facing
the Eliminator.
- Hey, pal, listen,
I really want to see you
win next weekend, huh?
- Me too.
- How would you like
a one-man crew chief?
- You're hired.
[drill whirring]
- Hey.
- You hear the latest
about Roy Barnes?
- No. Do we want to?
- Well, apparently now
he's a patron of the sport.
- What?
"Toy mogul Roy Barnes
has thrown his hat
"into the winter sports arena
"by sponsoring Marshall
Booter's bobsled,
which will be competing in the
winter carnival race Saturday."
- Yeah, like it's NASCAR or
Can you believe this?
- No.
- Why is he doing it?
- "Well, just my way of giving
back to the community,"
"Barnes explained, as he stood
in front of his recently opened
New Britain store."
- What a pack of lies.
He's doing it to get to me.
- To get to us.
It'll just be that much sweeter
to watch them lose next week.
Hand me that screw
right there, please.
- I'm installing it now, sis.
You'd never even know
it's a camera.
Heck, you even fooled me.
- Hard to believe.
- Right? This dude's
shoplifting days are numbered.
- Oh, that's great.
Thanks, bro.
Hold on, I got to take this,
All right.
Talk soon. Bye, Randy.
This is huge.
Thanks, Tess.
I owe you one.
Tess Howard, I helped her ace
third period algebra,
and now she gives me intel
on Roy Barnes.
- What's up?
- Well, Tess works
at the warehouse
where they're shipping
the Alicias from.
- And?
- And...
she said there is limited
on the dolls
this year.
Anyone who placed their order
after October 15th
won't be getting their dolls
in time for Christmas.
- Like Roy Barnes's
new store?
- Like Roy Barnes's
new store.
- Does that mean Roy
is out of luck?
- Up a creek
without a princess.
[all laugh]
- Hey, Roy!
Neil Armstrong, Roy!
Neil Armstrong!
- What? Neil Armstrong?
Buddy, you're the one
in outer space.
- Randy, I noticed some more
missing inventory.
I think our shoplifter
has struck again.
- Don't worry, sis.
The gnome is in the home
and on the job 24/7.
Let's take a bite
out of crime.
Okay, never mind
about last night.
Just go to when you first
opened up this morning.
- Gas station, Randy.
Gas station.
- No! I had the gnome
facing the wrong way.
At the window.
- You know what?
It's my fault, Randy.
When I said to monitor
the store,
I really should have specified
this store.
- Hey, hey, don't beat
yourself up, sis.
I'm partly to blame
here too.
[phone rings]
- Hey, Tess. What's up?
What bad news?
Will, we've got a problem.
- How big?
- Think Armageddon.
- Uh, Sam will finish
ringing you up, ma'am.
Sam, please.
- What's up?
- Money changed hands.
The dolls that were supposed
to be coming to us tonight,
they're being delivered
to Roy's.
- But isn't that,
oh, what's the word that
means opposite of legal?
- Well, if Barnes
forged the papers,
it's just his word
against ours.
- We could sue.
- And we would definitely win.
But I just talked to a lawyer.
He said it could take
up to three years.
- Those are our dolls,
Forrester. We paid for them.
- I know. The question is,
how are we going
to get them back?
- [sighs]
- How are your
acting skills?
- Let's find out.
- Is this Big Al Larkin?
This is Sue Dodie
calling from corporate.
Yeah, listen, I just heard
from New Britain.
Uh, what's going on out there?
I mean, you lost or something?
- What are you
talking about, lost?
I'm on Route 7 now.
- Oh, no, you did not
just say that, Al.
Uh, please hold. Ned, Ned,
he says he's on Route 7.
I think he's going
to the wrong address.
- What? I want that man fired!
- Oh, whoa, whoa, Ned.
Okay, look, look,
cool your jets, okay?
I know that Roy
is your brother-in-law,
but let's give the man
a chance, okay?
Al, Al, listen,
are you with me?
Listen, you're going
to the wrong address, okay?
You want to go to
870 Juniper Road, you got that?
- 870 Juniper. Got it.
Am I in trouble?
- Not if you get there
in the next 10 minutes.
Good luck, Al.
- Nice. Yes.
Oh, 10 minutes. Come on.
- Okay.
- We got to go.
- Where are my keys?
- Tell Sue Dodie that was
9 minutes and 58 seconds.
- What happened?
- I was running late.
I had to cross the river
at Marineaux Road.
- They got a bridge there now?
- No.
They really could
use one, though.
This looks like
a high school.
- Yeah, you know,
Roy decided
Tower wasn't big
enough for him,
went out and bought himself
a high school.
- Pretty nifty, huh?
- I guess so.
It doesn't look
like a store, though.
- Thank you, Al.
That's exactly the look
we were looking for.
- Yeah. Latest thing
in kids' marketing, Al.
You make them think they're
in school, and then bam!
- Yeah, yeah,
our new slogan is,
"It's always recess
at Roy's Toys."
- Ah. Not bad.
- Yeah.
- Hey, want me
to pull around back?
- We're already unloading, Al.
Thank you, though.
- Gotcha.
- Do you think Barnes
will report us?
- For taking back
our own stuff?
Not likely.
- That's it.
- We did it. Ah!
- Nice, partner. Nice.
Got it.
- Moonglow
The moon will always shine
Shining all around
I may be a terrible singer,
but I still love this song.
- Yeah, me too.
Oh, this is me
right here.
Up and to the left.
Thanks for the lift.
You know, the last thing
I expected
was to have fun tonight.
- Me too.
- But you did?
- Overall, I'd say it was
better than a head cold
or filing a tax return.
- You know, when you gush like
that, it just embarrasses me.
- Good night, DiNova.
- By the way,
would it kill us
if we started using
first names?
- Why take chances?
- Come on. Just try saying,
"Good night, Will."
- Good night, Will.
- There you go.
Was that so bad?
- Sort of.
- Good night, Connie.
- Good night.
- And listen, now that we
have the dolls and Roy doesn't,
tomorrow's going to be
a mob scene.
Get some sleep.
[car door closes]
- Some mob scene.
Where is everybody?
- I don't know. Is there
something great showing on TV,
like The Godfather,
or John Wick 2?
I doubt it, Randy.
- No, John Wick 2.
- I heard you.
Maybe they're all
at DiNova's.
- We're back here.
Our customers.
- Shoppers at the Roy's Toys
in New Britain
got the Christmas surprise
of their life today
when Stephanie Desmore,
the pop sensation
whose theme from Moonglow
is now the number one hit
in the country,
took to the stage as part
of an all-day holiday concert
sponsored by toy magnate
Roy Barnes.
Word spread fast,
thanks to social media.
And now the star-studded event
has attracted an audience
of thousands.
- Barnes had her
flown in today?
- Yup. We got the dolls,
but he got the diva.
- The moon will
always shine
- I hate this song.
- Shine on...
- Mike.
Hey. Listen, business took
a major hit on Tuesday.
It picked back up again
but that balloon payment
I have coming up,
I'm going to be
a little short.
- How short?
- Uh...
- That's pretty short.
- I know, I know.
I have to ask for an extension.
I can give you $30,000 now,
but the other $40,000
maybe in three months.
- Fine.
- Before you shoot me down,
I just want to say that--
Wait, what?
- I'll have to run it
by Mr. Harris, of course,
but I'm confident
he'll be agreeable.
- Really?
You're not joking?
- Connie, have you ever
met a banker
that had you rolling
in the aisles?
- Good point.
Thanks, Mike.
Merry Christmas.
- Merry Christmas.
- [laughs]
- Plus a little cooking oil
for added viscosity.
And then you just stir.
And voil.
- Then it just sits here
- That's it, buddy.
You just got to leave
these garage doors open,
and by the morning these
runners will be pure ice.
Grease lightning.
- Not bad.
- Hmm.
- Will this really work?
- Well, it worked against
Mark and Frankie.
- Mom, I think Will might be
almost as smart as you.
- Not quite.
But I have my moments.
- Dinner's ready,
Will, why don't you
join us.
- Come on.
- No, you cannot
see that movie.
You're not allowed.
Not for another 10 years.
- Mm.
- Mom, do you think Roy Barnes
will be at the race
- Oh, I'm sure of it, kiddo.
- Doesn't he live down
in Stanford?
- Yeah, but he'll be there.
- Oh, I burned him but good
the other night when I drove
past the gas station.
You guys should have
been there.
It was the night
that I installed
the Gnome in the Home.
- Remember?
- Oh, yeah, I remember.
- Yeah. So he's over
by the station pumps,
just yakking with some dude.
And I cruise up and start
going, "Hey, Neil Armstrong.
Neil Armstrong."
I rocked him to the core.
- Neil Armstrong? Like--
Like the first man
to walk on the moon?
- Yeah. Yeah, like,
"one small step for man,
one giant leap
for mankind."
I was calling him
a space cadet.
I was telling him to moonwalk
back where he came from.
Neil Armstrong.
Come on.
Don't tell me you never
heard of that before.
- I never heard that before.
- Ah, well,
I guess it's just not
hip enough for you then.
Kids all know
what it means, right?
- I never heard it before
either, no.
- Well, I mean,
the young kids.
- Yeah, sure. Yeah.
- Yeah.
- Thanks for dinner.
- Oh, thank you.
It was nice to get my mind
off Roy Barnes for a few hours.
Do you think he even enjoys
what makes him rich?
You know, toys,
children, all of that?
- Not the way you do.
You really love it,
don't you?
Why do you love it
so much?
- Well, what do you remember
about growing up?
I mean, before the age of 10.
- Not much.
- Most people don't.
But I bet there's a special toy
you remember.
- Hot Wheels
Spiral Speedway.
Got it for
my 8th birthday.
- See what I mean?
Ah, Spiral Speedway.
Mattel introduced that
in 1983,
discontinued in '91.
Awesome track.
- Whoa.
- Well, when I help a child
find the perfect toy,
it doesn't just
make them happy.
It creates a memory...
And when I do that, well,
it's not solving
world peace,
but it's not nothing either,
- Far from it.
Hey, uh, do you mind
if I ask you
a somewhat
personal question?
- I guess I'd have
to hear it first.
- Have you been out
with anybody since...
- Since I lost my husband?
The answer is yes.
- Yes?
- Yes, I do mind the somewhat
personal question.
- For what?
All right, well, I guess
I'll see you tomorrow.
Top of the hill.
- Top of the hill.
[engine starts]
- [exhales]
- All right, here we go.
- Okay.
- This is it right here.
- Careful, TJ. Slippery.
- He's all right.
- All right.
- Okay, buddy,
let's go get ready.
Get away from your mom.
- Forrester,
how's it going?
- Roy.
- I heard you had
a little confusion
with the delivery of your dolls
the other day.
I'm very sorry.
- These things happen.
Here looking after
your investment?
Oh, that? Come on,
that's just local advertising.
I don't have a horse
in this race.
I just came out to support
my new neighbors.
- Like the one you hope beats
the pants off my little boy.
- Not true. I'm only sorry
that there can't be more
than one winner today.
But there never is,
is there?
- You're a real piece of work,
you know that?
- Okay, bobsledders,
take your places
on the starting line.
- Mom, where's Uncle Randy?
- He's down by the finish line.
You want Boots to give him
a message for you?
- You're going
to do great, bud.
- Oh...
Okay, do you see him?
- [gasps]
- Oh!
- TJ!
- Whoo-hoo!
- Come on, buddy!
- The first thing I want to do
is go over the rules.
When I say go,
you slide down this hill.
Any questions?
Because that would
concern me.
- Ready?
- All right, listen,
it's just like
the practice runs.
Tilt the wheel,
don't jerk it.
- Got it.
- And remember,
you own this hill.
These other kids,
what are they doing here?
- Visiting.
- Exactly.
Let's do it.
- Hey, listen,
I want you to win,
but I'm also your mom,
so be careful, okay?
All right, go get them.
- You're all strapped in?
Because we have
no insurance.
On your marks...
get set...
- Come on, sweetheart. Come on.
- All right.
- Oh, my God!
- What? What's happening?
- Barnes has better binoculars
than I do.
- Ugh!
- Come on, come on!
- Aah!
- No!
- Go, go, go, go, go, go!
[all cheer]
- Yes!
- Yes! All right.
[both laughing]
- Sorry, I got caught up
in the moment.
- Bravo.
No kidding,
that was magnificent.
- Miss Halifax.
- A thing of beauty.
- And a joy forever.
- You should really be on
Broadway, you know that, Roy?
- What are you
talking about?
I told you, I have no horse
in this race.
- That you did.
See you around.
[music playing]
[no audio]
- You know the penalty
for failure.
Nice of you to drop in.
- Hey. Want to dance,
- Yeah, sure.
- The answer is no.
- Hmm?
- No, I haven't been out with
anyone since Sam passed away.
You know, at first
you're just afraid
of what your kid
might think,
but then when he starts asking
why you're not seeing anyone,
you know it's a little more
complicated than that.
- I don't think
it's complicated.
- No?
- You've been through
the ringer the last few years.
Twice, in fact.
Who wouldn't be scared
to get close again?
- TJ likes you.
- Of course he does.
I'm adorable.
- Sometimes.
Oh, did I really
just say that?
- Yeah, surprised me too.
- Feel like going
for a walk?
- Sure.
- Randy, wait.
Are you going home?
- Oh, hey, Francine.
Yeah, my Blu-ray copy
of The War for the Planet of
the Ap es came in today, so...
- I love Planet of the Apes.
- Wait, you do?
- Yes, I love it so much.
- Wow, so cool.
- I know, right?
- Yeah.
Definitely going to have to
lend it to you sometime then.
Remind me, okay?
- Okay.
[slow music playing]
- Well, you're quite
the dancer.
I...I took a couple
of lessons
while I was stationed
in Madrid.
It seemed safer
than studying bullfighting.
- [laughs]
So you were in the service?
- Marine Corps,
23 years.
- Wow. That's very
- [laughs]
Well, I don't know
about that.
A lot of guys were in
the Marine Corps.
Better than me.
Let's try it again.
- Whoo!
- Whoo!
[mellow music plays]
- Listen, I know I can be
a little sarcastic sometimes...
- Oh, stop the presses!
Hold the headline.
- Speaking of sarcasm.
But, no, this is from
the heart.
I can't thank you
enough, Will.
- Well, TJ did most
of the work.
- No, I don't mean
just about the race today.
I mean about everything.
You know,
the whole partnership.
It was a good idea.
You were right.
And if business keeps going
the way it's been...
- Why wouldn't it?
- And the board rejects
Barnes's waiver on the 24th...
- How could they not?
- Well, then everything will go
back to the way it was before.
- Not a minute too soon.
- So...dissolving our new
that's good news, right?
- The best ever.
- I hate it too.
[tender music plays]
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
See you later.
Hi. Did you find
everything you need?
I'll just curl this
for you real quick.
Make it nice and...
There we go.
- [sighs]
I don't know about this.
I never liked
the chandelier, really.
- Does Liberace live here?
- I was also thinking about
putting in a porch light
right here.
- Oh, nice.
That's very
Pepperidge Farm.
You think Connie
will like it?
- What do you mean?
- Come on, Will.
Am I blind?
You think handsome and sexy
equals blind?
Everybody in town knows what's
going on between you two.
She's a great girl.
You're a very lucky guy.
- That I am.
It's my family home.
- There is one piece
of bad luck, I'm afraid.
This couple down in Philly,
they're interested in making
an offer on the place.
I can stall them for a while,
but not indefinitely.
So do you think you're close
to raising the 80 grand?
- Well, I got 37 so far.
Forty if I cash in
my bonds.
- That's not enough.
- How much time do I have?
- Two, three weeks, maybe.
- Oh, that's not enough.
- Will...
I know you were
happy here with Laura.
- For a while.
- And I know you think
buying back this house
will somehow make you
whole again.
But maybe there's an argument
for not buying it back
and moving on
with your life.
- Get a hold
of yourself, Ben.
- The forecast: cloudy,
windy and cold this morning...
- By the way, what was your
favorite toy growing up?
- Dizzy Doll.
- Dizzy Doll.
What is that?
Like a baby doll?
- Mm-hmm. Yeah.
His eyes would sort of
light up when he speaks.
- I know a girl
just like that.
- Come on down to Roy's Toys,
where everything at my
New Britain store is 80% off.
Nope, there's nothing wrong
with your television,
and you don't need
a hearing aid.
But if toys
are what you're after,
at Roy's they're 80% off.
No, no, no.
Go on back home, Santa.
Roy's got it covered this year
with this 80% off sale.
That's spelled 8-O-M-G.
It's 80% off, only at Roy's.
See you soon.
80% off.
- New Britain only.
He's doing this to sink us.
- Man, we're dead.
- Over my dead body.
[dramatic music]
[indistinct chatter]
- Oh, my gosh.
Whose puppy is this?
- What's going on?
- What's your name,
little fella?
- Oh, is it a doggy?
Is he okay?
Miss Forrester...
- I love these figures, Rick.
You guys are going to love
your bonuses this year.
Speaking of lovely figures.
- Sorry, Roy.
She stormed right past me.
- Oh, that's no problem.
Guys, you want to give us
a minute?
So, Miss Forrester,
how are you?
Let me guess.
- No, I passed seething
back on Route 15, Roy.
You're looking
at full-on rage.
I want you out
of New Britain.
- I don't blame you.
- This is just another drop in
the corporate bucket for you.
You know, you don't have
to be here, but we do.
- Look, it's nothing personal.
My team did a field study
last year,
and realized that a store
in your part of the state
would optimize market share.
So we opened one.
- To optimize market share?
- Exactly.
- For what does it profit a man
to gain the world
but forfeit his soul?
- He gains the world.
- You really are hopeless,
you know that?
- Everybody should be
so hopeless.
But, hey, I need a manager
for my New Britain store.
Somebody local, somebody smart.
You know,
knows all the parents' names,
sold toys to all the kids.
What do you think?
I'll give you a great salary.
I'd even buy your store.
How about it?
- I think you know what you can
do with your offer, Roy.
Neil Armstrong!
- What is with
the Neil Armstrong thing?
Field estimate.
Forrester's chances
of staying in business
if I take no further action
from here?
- Three to one.
- Here you go.
[phone rings]
Here you go, boys.
Merry Christmas.
- Merry Christmas.
- Merry Christmas.
- Sis, telephone.
- Hello?
Yeah. Mike.
- Connie, I just had a call
from Mr. Harris.
I'm afraid he's rescinding
your extension.
- What do you mean
he's rescinding it?
- You need to have the rest
of your loan
repaid by the 24th.
- Mike, today's the 22nd.
- It's out
of my hands, Connie.
- Did Roy Barnes
put him up to this?
It's nothing official,
you understand.
- Then tell me
Barnes is a VIP customer
at the bank.
He threatened to take
his money elsewhere
if we didn't play ball.
I'm very sorry, Connie.
- Hey, sorry I'm late.
I didn't know Joe
had a liquor license.
- He got it two weeks ago.
Just in time.
- I'll have a beer,
please, Francine.
- You got it.
- Thanks.
I'm really sorry.
- Got room for another clerk?
Experienced, hardworking,
and she'll even
go on dates with you.
- Oh, I'd hire you
in a flat second,
but it turns out
my doors are closing too.
- Hmm?
- Um...
Connie, I don't know
how to tell you this, but...
I just took a job
with Roy Barnes.
It's the same one
he offered you.
Even if the board votes
to get him out on the 24th,
he still wants to hire me.
He promised to buy
my shop.
- No.
- I want that house,
I need that house.
- No, you can't do this.
- I'm so sorry--
- No, you can't be doing this.
- Connie, please listen.
You have to tell me
you understand.
You have to, Connie,
otherwise the guilt's
just going to eat me alive.
- Well, you know, they have
cures for everything now.
[dramatic music]
- Eleanor. You got here
just in time.
- What do you mean?
- Well, we're having
a special today.
Everything in the store
is marked down
for customers named
after famous first ladies.
- Marked down?
- 100%.
- My gosh.
- Better hurry,
because there was a Mary Todd
in here looking at that
- Thank you.
- Merry Christmas.
And Roy Barnes would put an end
to that sense of community.
I mean, not overnight,
of course.
But it only starts
with toys.
And before you know it,
your dress shop that
you've owned for 17 years
would be wiped out by
a 30,000-square-foot box store.
And Jim, your hardware store
would go head-to-head
with a Home World.
I mean, sure, it's got a bigger
but lower quality.
And terrible service.
And that kind of attitude
seeps into the groundwater.
Abby, by the time little Wendy
graduates high school,
this will hardly
be a town anymore.
You know, it'll just be
another giant retail wasteland
with a few houses
in between.
I mean, sure,
the maps and signs
will still say New Britain,
but it'll be a lie.
And we'll be the ones
telling it.
Thank you.
- Thank you, Connie.
Now the board
will take its vote.
Yay to approve Mr. Barnes'
motion to remain in town.
And nay to reject it.
Thank you, Shirley.
It's only three votes,
so it won't take too long
to tabulate.
The first vote is...
And the second vote is...
And the third
and final vote is...
Roy's gets to remain
in town.
Mr. Barnes.
You ingrate.
I gave you a kidney.
- I support
the free market, Ben.
I had to vote
my conscience.
- Sis, the guy over there...
- Pete Griffin.
What about him?
- He's the one
that I saw with Barnes
at the gas station
the other night.
Neil Armstrong, remember?
- Are you sure?
- Yeah, I'm positive.
- Well, why would Barnes drive
all the way from Stanford
at that time of night
to meet with a councilman?
Ben, that vote
was tampered with.
- Tampered with?
By who?
- By you. You were spotted
a few nights back
at the gas station
with Pete Griffin.
- Filling my tank.
- That's when the money
changed hands.
- That's a serious charge
you're making, Connie.
- Randy will testify to it.
- Oh, I'm sure he will.
Doesn't mean it happened.
Besides, I just met
that man today.
- Pete?
- He's telling you
the truth, Ben.
- He said, she said.
What's the point in even
talking about it?
- I feel sorry for you.
- So do I.
You know why
I feel sorry for you, Roy?
Because you're nothing
but a no-good, two-face liar.
- What did you call me?
- You heard me.
- I guess you don't want
to be working for me then, huh?
- Yeah.
You got that right, Roy.
Guess I'll stick with humans
from now on.
Excuse me.
[somber music]
- Remember this guy?
- Dizzy.
- Yeah, his eyes glow
when he speaks.
- I know a boy like that.
I wanted to come over
and say thank you.
You didn't have
to do that.
- It was a lousy job
Should have seen
the break room.
- Was it worth it?
- Almost.
Okay, now it was
worth it.
- Why is it so dark
in here?
- Yeah, they shut
my power off today.
I was going to pay
the bill, but...
- Why didn't you?
- Can't afford it.
- But you have $40,000.
- Had. Not anymore.
I spent it right before
I went to City Hall.
- Spent it on what?
Your house, of course.
- Not on the house.
On your store,
It's all yours again,
Free and clear.
You deserve it.
A lot more than
I deserve you.
- But Barnes will just put me
out of business in a year.
- Then we'll just have
to fight him somehow.
- Where have you been
all this time?
- Just up the street.
- Hey.
- Hi, Joe.
- Is this a bad time?
- No, no, no.
Come on in, come on in.
Well, how about
some coffee?
- Oh, no, thanks.
- I was just getting
ready for church.
I guess I probably shouldn't
wear a tie with this shirt,
should I?
- No, you don't need it.
Listen, I just came by
to return this check.
It's too much money.
- Well, uh...
Christmas bonus.
- Well, that's very
generous of you,
but I don't think
I deserve it.
You're not making
much progress.
You're not making any progress.
Have you been practicing
two hours a day like I asked?
Because your niece Tilly's
is right around the corner.
- [sighs]
- Joe, where's your piano?
- [chuckles]
- You don't have a piano,
do you?
- I don't have
a niece Tilly either.
- But I've been
giving you lessons
every day for three weeks.
- And they were worth
every penny.
- Oh. Hey, Francine.
Connie's not here.
- Uh, no, I'm not
here for her.
Randy, do you have a minute?
There's something
I need you to see.
- Yeah.
- [sighs]
- You caught the shoplifter?
- Um, no, Randy.
I am the shoplifter.
But I'm returning
And I'll turn myself in,
if you like.
- But why did you...?
- I wanted you to notice me.
- What for?
- I'll set fire
to the sign tomorrow.
- Oh, careful there, kid.
Arson's a serious crime.
- [chuckles]
- Don't forget,
the gnome sees all.
- The Gnome in the Home.
It was facing
the wrong way.
- Your faces, your cars,
your license plates.
You're toast.
- Yeah. Just met this guy
today, huh, Roy?
- I gave you my kidney,
for crying out loud.
What did he ever give you?
- Eight grand.
- Eight gra--!
That's it.
I want my kidney back.
I want it now.
Hand it over!
Wait, you know what?
I'm just going to take it
from you!
Get over here!
- Field estimate.
What are my chances of winning
if that goes to trial?
I hate that number.
- [laughs]
- Hey!
- Good work.
- Thank you,
Pam and Joe Haggarty,
for that lovely
Many of you were present at
their wedding this past spring.
Although tonight,
we are all gathered here
to celebrate the union
between Connie and Will.