Almost Pyaar with DJ Mohabbat (2023) Movie Script
Love.
Love has many sides, my friend.
Love doesn't ask for permission.
It just strikes without warning.
And at the worst possible time.
And the problems of love
evolve with society.
Society defines the boundaries of love.
And when love is boundless
we mistake our vulnerability for weakness.
And then we try to suppress it.
We hide our vulnerability.
Why?
Because society shames us for it.
And if a guy acts vulnerable
then he's simply not man enough.
After all
we gotta prove our manliness, bro!
Vulnerability is for pussies.
That's what they say, right?
But you know what?
If you have that vulnerability within you
it's the most beautiful thing.
Mohabbat!
Its power is humble,
just like the winter sun.
It may seem feeble at first
But when night falls
That's when you realize
It was the sun's gentle warmth
that kept you alive all day!
It's so nice and sunny today!
-Lovely.
-I hope it doesn't rain.
So this Holi, DJ Mohabbat is coming
with his "Almost Love" concert
from beachy Goa,
straight to the mountains
At a secret location near Manali.
Why secret, you ask?
Because like every year
We do not have police permission, fellas!
One week to go.
Find out and get there.
48 hours, non-stop music.
Come, feel the love.
See you there.
There's a bloke
There's a girl
They're deep in love
But flat-out broke
Instant noodle is all they eat
This friendship is oh, so sweet
Two vagabond hearts fall in love and swoon
They're doomed
Two vagabond hearts fall in love and swoon
Two vagabond hearts fall in love and swoon
They're doomed
Two vagabond hearts fall in love and swoon
About the world, no fucks given
Chilling is their religion
Marching to the beat of their own drum
They call themselves the crazy ones
Two vagabond hearts fall in love and swoon
They're doomed
Two vagabond hearts fall in love and swoon
They're doomed
Two vagabond hearts fall in love and swoon
They're doomed
Two vagabond hearts fall in love and swoon
LONDON
Harmeet!
Yes, sir.
That was sick!
-Thank you.
-Very good indeed. Well done!
Thank you, sir.
See you tomorrow.
See you, sir.
Lentils and rice?
-Goodnight, sir.
-Goodnight.
Harmeet!
Come here.
I want to introduce you to someone.
-This is my friend, Ayesha.
-Hi!
Ayesha
-Nice to meet you.
-Namaste, miss.
-"Miss"! So cute.
-Sorry?
We're having an after-party at my place.
That's great.
Will you come?
No, I need to get home.
I have work in the morning, so
Just one drink. It won't kill you.
I don't really drink.
Can I take a selfie?
Yeah?
I don't have my phone.
Do you have your phone?
You left your phone, right?
I did, yes.
Can I use your phone, please?
I'll take the picture
and send it to myself.
Yes.
Okay.
Actually, I prefer the other angle.
Can I take it from there?
No, that's no good.
Sorry, I'll just take a few more.
Let me take it! Come on.
Thanks.
Is that good? Be careful of my nose.
And we're done!
Yeah, this is good. Can I
-I'll send it to my number.
-Okay?
I've saved my number. Ayesha.
Ayesha Salim Phgura.
-Okay. Bye, Harmeet.
-Thank you.
DALHOUSIE
Love!
Love!
Love!
Love!
Love!
Love!
Greetings to all you
TingTongians out there
from your beloved Saloni Ammi!
Not by breaths
Not by steps
The world moves because of love
Not by breaths
Not by steps
The world moves because of love
Not because of wealth
Not because of strength
The world moves because of love!
Love!
Love!
Brother!
Love!
Love!
Granny.
Greetings to all you
TingTongians out there
from your beloved Saloni Ammi!
Tell me something, who is this "Mohabbat"?
And where the hell is he?
I even got a divorce because of him!
What is he?
He says, life's all about love.
He raises your hopes.
Then he says, meet me on Holi!
At least give us an address, mister!
What's this rubbish you keep watching?!
Phones have ruined this generation!
This is what they do all day.
That's why we didn't give her a phone.
It must be okay in "their" community
Begging for a guy's number
In front of the whole world!
Amrita!
You're running late!
Mom, I'm coming!
-Sanju. Drop your sister at the bus stop.
-Yes.
Salaam alaikum.
Walaikum salaam.
Dad, how much worth of DVDs
do you think I'll sell today?
Four thousand.
Five.
I'll hand you the money by evening.
Junior! Fancy a lollipop?
I'll get DJ Mohabbat's number by evening.
Tell me if you want to go.
We can catch the bus from here.
Find an excuse to leave home
for two days, and that too on Holi.
Hey!
What's up with him?
Must've gone to call my brother.
Why?
Because you're talking to me.
Is talking to you a crime?
Only my brother can tell you that.
Will he beat me up?
I don't know.
When a guy talks to a girl,
what does her brother usually do?
Depends on who the brother is.
All brothers aren't the same, right?
My brother would thrash
any guy who talks to me.
How come he hasn't thrashed me?
Because he doesn't know yet.
Lollipop?
-He definitely looks pissed.
-Best of luck!
I'll see you on Holi, outside the school.
Holi's still a week away!
-Okay then, bye!
-Catch him!
Stop, you rascal!
Catch him!
Get the scoundrel! Get him!
Do not let him get away! Catch him!
Climb up!
How do I catch him,
he's like a goddamn monkey!
Over there!
Stop!
Climb up!
-There he goes.
-Let's get him!
Stop!
How far will you run?!
-You'll come down sooner or later.
-Stop, fucker!
Catch him!
-Stop!
-Come down!
Catch him!
Catch.
Come down!
Where's your son?
-What happened, my boy?
-Where's your son Yakub?
-You used to call me "Uncle," right?
-Those days are long gone!
-Where is he?
-But what happened?
-Wait here, I'll check ahead.
-What's the matter, my child?
You people better stay within your limits.
Be grateful that we let you live here!
It started as a crush
Then we fell in love
Like a sign from above
Show me your Kardashian style
Kardashian!
Sir, think about "Kardashian style."
Like, Kim Kardashian!
Huge, sir. Huge!
Sir, take it from me.
This song will be a millennial anthem.
Of the millennials, by a millennial!
Do you have any idea
what a music producer's credit
is worth in the market?
Huge!
Don't think of India.
They may not understand.
But here, everyone gets it.
Look. I'll be the music composer.
And you? The music producer!
I'll be the horse
And you, the jockey!
You'll play derby on my back
in the Indian Music Industry!
Plus, I'll give you 10,000 pounds.
I'm offering you a great deal!
Get it?
I'll mention you in every interview.
Trust me.
"If it wasn't for this boy,
this song wouldn't exist!"
I'll make you a sensation!
Everyone will want to know,
"Who is Harmeet?"
"Who is Harmeet?"
Look, sell me the song.
You'll be set for life.
If you don't give me the song,
it won't feature in the film.
It won't become an anthem.
No one will know who you are.
She screams, what-the-hell
She's always raising hell
This girl's crazy
She's always spinning lies
Her ego's epic-sized
This girl's crazy
-She stings at random
-She stings!
-And laughs with abandon
-She laughs!
She reveals new colors
Her many crazy colors
She'll make you dance
To her whims and fancies
So let go, let go!
Thats like a Woman Desi!
Thats like a Woman Desi!
Rosy!
Life's a celebration
Let the party go on
It's the biggest high
If it must, let it rise
Dreaming with open eyes
Oh yeah, that's life
Throwing colors at you
Each day a fresh hue
Oh yeah, that's life
She'll give you life lessons
Her swag leaves an impression
Stare you down bit by bit
She'll give you tons of shit
Her temper's always rising
And she ain't apologizing
So let go, let go!
Thats like a Woman Desi!
Thats like a Woman Desi!
Did you record him?
No, I was recording you.
Don't lie!
-Dude, you're such a freak!
-He frigging ignores me!
He didn't even look at me. Not once.
-Babe, he--
-Not once!
-Babe, he ignores everybody.
-I straightened my hair for him.
I perform with him and he doesn't even
No one has ever rejected me. Not once.
I think he's gay.
Shut up. Just shut up.
Everybody hits on me, okay?
-DJs. Musicians, singers
-He didn't even reply with "Miss."
Nothing!
He didn't even hit on me.
Next time, I'll get you some pickles.
-Mom makes this amazing mango pickle
-Hi!
You didn't reply to me? I'd texted you.
Mind if I eat with you?
I haven't had Indian food in ages.
My mom made this, especially for him.
Cool. May I?
Sure.
I am 18, you know?
Should I speak in Hindi?
My name's Ayesha.
I am 18 years old.
I can do whatever I want.
And you can reply to me freely.
So now, can I buy you a drink?
Please.
I don't drink, miss.
Then what do you do?
You're not a saint, right?
Do you think I'm pretty?
You can say it aloud.
Why is he like this?
Why are you like this?
Why is he like this?
I had frigging lentils and rice with him!
Oh, baby
How can a guy who eats bland lentils
and rice digest spicy butter chicken?
He says he's from Germany, but
When he talks, he sounds
like a village bumpkin.
Oh, so first he was gay,
and now he's a bumpkin?
Of course!
He's gay or he's a bumpkin!
In fact, I think he might have
a wife back in his village.
Maybe kids too.
I'm telling you.
I've dated a lot of Punjabi guys
in my time.
Botti is the word. It means wife.
Maybe he has a Botti.
But what's his deal?
He's not exactly Ranveer Singh, you know!
He's definitely not Ranveer Singh.
Exactly. I have to frigging decode him.
No, nope.
No. Come on.
We're going to find you a nice,
straight boy
who loves butter chicken.
We love by choice, not by chance.
But by the time we understand this
Our entire lives have swept past.
Hey, quickly move.
Salaam alaikum, sir.
What's going on?
Nothing!
Just admiring the park. It's so beautiful.
-What's up?
-Hand over your scooter keys.
-What's going on?
-Your scooter keys!
Get inside the car.
-Where are you taking me, sir?
-Get inside!
Get inside!
That which you want to
own like property
That's not love.
That is self-validation.
This is the root cause of all problems.
Initially, you like someone
Whether they know it or not.
And they, our object of affection,
are happy on their own trip.
Because suddenly it's sunny days
after years of stormy seas.
Little does he know
that this gentle breeze
is really a deadly shitstorm
of gross self-validation.
And he only sees it
when he's in the eye of the storm.
So what does he do?
He rejects it because he gets scared.
He was never ready
for this emotional cyclone.
What did he want? Simple, easy love.
And what did he get?
A complicated math equation.
Where RHS is yes, and LHS is no.
My grandpa used to say,
Son, if you can't take her "no,"
you're not worthy of her "yes."
Such is the tragedy of love.
It's often unrequited
and only unrequited love is romantic.
After all, what fun is love
if it doesn't make for a great story?
So bringing you stories of romance
is DJ Mohabbat playing live tonight
exclusively for the Desis
of Sunrise Radio.
Thank you. Cheers! Thank you.
Thank you.
Hello, sir!
Big fan.
I've heard all your podcasts on Notify.
I love your music, sir.
And I also love the way
you talk about love.
What do you do?
Sir, I'm a DJ too.
I play music just like you.
Want me to listen to your music?
Yes, sir. If you have the time.
What's your name?
I'm Harmeet.
Have we met before?
No, sir.
Sure?
Yes, sir.
Your face looks really familiar.
Where
Ting Tong!
That viral Ting Tong video, right?
What was it you were saying
"I couldn't unite my love with hers.
I couldn't make it past the queue."
It was you, of course!
Really?
I'm not even on Ting Tong!
Not here, in India. Somewhere in Himachal.
I'm dying to go to India!
Turn that way.
Now this side.
Of course, it's you!
What's your name again?
-Harmeet?
-Yaqub!
Yaqub! I remember
Hold on. I might have the video too.
Here it is.
Put these on.
Watch.
Greetings from Yaqub
to all you TingTongians.
My father says, love as you please
and whoever you please.
But to express that love or grasp it,
isn't in everyone's destiny.
It is you, right?
Please, sir! At least tell me
why you're hitting me?
Unless you tell me what I'm accused of,
how will you know if I'm guilty or not?
-Did you harass Mr. Suri's daughter today?
-No, sir!
We received a complaint.
It is utterly false, sir!
Yaqub never troubles women.
Ask anyone in the hood.
In fact, girls feel safe in the area
only because Yaqub lives there.
So, Suri's sons made a false complaint?
Sir, Mr. Suri's daughter loves movies.
I sell DVDs-
I only show their daughter movies
And because she's cute,
I don't charge her money-
What's "cute"?
-It's a word.
-What does it mean?
I don't exactly know. But I can tell you
what's cute and what's not.
I'm cute because
I'm telling you what cute is.
This gentleman is cute because he
didn't know for how long he had to hit me.
Stay away from Mr. Suri's daughter
from now on.
We plan to attend a music concert
on Holi.
No. Forget about it.
Sir, she wants to come.
If I see you within half a kilometer
of Mr. Suri's house
But my house falls within that radius!
-Should I not even go home?
-Now scoot!
Yes.
What?
Get your act together.
And I'll personally drop your scooter
at your house within a month.
Understood?
Now get going.
Abrar?
Yes, salaam.
You know of Mr. Suri's son, right?
Yeah, the one who organized
the temple ceremony.
Yes. Just beware of him.
Both you and Yaqub.
Since when have you been talking to him?
Ever since he's been talking to me.
And what do you talk about?
He just talks nonsense. I listen.
His nonsense is fun.
Brother, he's taking her to see Mohammed.
Mohammed?
Not Mohammed, stupid. Mohabbat.
That lowlife wants to take you out?
That is "their" modus operandi.
Seduce you with fairy tales,
then lock you in a veil!
Mom, stop being paranoid!
Mohabbat is a DJ. He makes music.
All the kids listen to his songs.
DJ Mohabbat?
Yes.
Listening to all these songs
has corrupted you.
Brother! Mom!
Don't talk to me!
And let go of the curtain!
Do as your brother says.
Have I committed a sin?
He spoke to me, and I responded.
What's the big deal?
What did you say?
To what?
When he asked you
to come and see Mohabbat with him?
-Nothing.
-What did you say?
I said, "Holi is still a week away."
As in?
As in, DJ Mohabbat's concert is on Holi.
So you didn't say no?
I challenged him.
If under your watch,
he can whisk me off to the concert
he must be worth something, right?
Get inside.
Leave the curtain and get inside.
Come on. Inside.
Quickly. Sit here.
No school for you till Holi.
You will stay at home.
Stay here and listen
to whatever songs you want.
Brother.
At least give me your phone
so that I can play songs.
Nice beats.
Thank you, sir!
The kids must be tripping
on this music, right?
Yes, sir. They dance--
It sounds cool.
But it's missing one thing, you.
As in, sir?
Like love is all about the other.
Music must be all about the self.
Harmeet's music should embody him, right?
Where he came from,
where he is, and where he's headed
Harmeet Who is he?
The Harmeet I find here is hanging
between his childhood and youth.
He's gonna get screwed, dude!
Headphone.
-Where's Amrita?
-No clue!
Granny, where's Amrita?
-Who are you, son?
-I'm Yaqub.
Yaqub.
Are you Muslim?
Yes, Granny.
Are you Hindu?
Well, I've been one since I was born.
Wow, I've been a Muslim
ever since I was born too!
It would be so cool
if after we grew up,
we could go to a shop,
and buy the religion of our choice.
If you had the choice, would you
I'd probably never visit the shop.
By the way, where's Amrita?
Are you Amrita's friend?
I don't know yet.
I'll ask her and tell you.
She's upstairs.
Hello, miss!
Amrita.
You?
What are you doing here?
The school van left without you,
so I figured something was wrong.
This is our chance.
Everyone's asleep right now.
-So?
-So
So many people dream of
running from home
But not everyone gets the chance.
We'll return after Holi. What do you say?
Check the right side.
The keys must be there.
Is it there?
Hey! Noodles!
Forget the old school
These are the new rules
Smartphones get bills paid
And get you laid
Hey, yo!
One shot of tequila, please.
The vibe's sick and grungy
It gives me thrills like PUBG
Come on, come over
Come on, come over
Leave the crowd and wait for me until
Netflix and chill!
Baby!
Netflix and chill!
Baby!
Netflix and chill!
Baby!
Netflix and chill!
Baby!
One more.
On either side or all around
She sits, lies down, or stretches out
Like bright sunlight or dark as night
Come on
Put a status on WhatsApp
Where are you?
Everyone stop bothering me!
I've told you so many times
not to park here!
Mr. Happy, you please go home.
And take the car with you.
I don't want the car
to be seen here. Please.
I'll get home, don't worry about me.
The Love-mobile drives on
Often wonky or straight on
It runs on its own will
Let the beer foam rise up
Let your touch fire me up
The night is getting better still
Go on, why don't you order?
Go on, why don't you order?
Some momos and munchies
Via the app, pay the bill
Netflix and chill!
Baby!
Netflix and chill!
Baby!
Netflix and chill!
Baby!
Netflix and chill!
Netflix! Netflix! Netflix and chill!
Sorry guys, excuse me. Coming through.
Excuse me, ladies.
-Is she okay?
-I don't think so.
-Can someone call Sapna, please?
-Sir, I'm trying to reach her.
Maybe her phone died.
-Did you text her?
-Yes, it's undelivered.
She saw her throwing up, right?
-Yes, sir.
-And still, she's disappeared?
Harmeet
Yes, sir?
Is something on between the two of you?
I mean, you can tell me if there is.
No, sir. There's nothing like that.
Just focus on your music right now.
Okay?
-These spoilt girls with rich daddies
-What's your problem?
Do you have an issue with me?
Just because I threw up
and passed out in your car,
do you think you can say anything?
You're manipulating him.
Whatever we have between us,
that's none of your business.
Hey, that's my brother's wallet!
Yeah, I mean the motorcycle's his too.
He carries my photo with him.
Well, brothers are meant
to protect their sisters, right?
Here, take this.
Come.
How's it going, citizens of Ting Tong?
All good?
Greetings from your beloved Saloni Ammi!
Tell me something, TingTongians
What's your scene?
Do you have any spirit
of adventure in you?
While you all sat talking
and twiddling your thumbs
This boy here pulled off
what none of you could.
Come here, boy!
Love!
Love!
Love!
Love!
-Tell me something
-Isn't she the same girl?
-What's your scene?
-The one I keep seeing everywhere.
-Do you have any spirit of adventure
-Totally shameless. Disgusting.
This burkha-clad girl
you're calling shameless
-It's Amrita.
-twiddling your thumbs.
-See?
-This boy here pulled off
-We didn't give her a phone.
-what none of you could.
So she's making Ting Tong videos
with that boy's phone.
-What?
-Look!
I don't need a girlfriend.
As it is, I don't fit in.
I don't know how to perform
when I play music.
I'm still so self-conscious.
Find a woman and see
how she changes your confidence.
I don't need a girl to change my life.
Hey
-Get the stand out.
-What's a stand?
Move.
Oh.
Make it a full tank, please.
-Want some cola?
-Yeah.
Two colas, please.
-Here you go.
-How much?
50 rupees.
-Hold on, I'll get my wallet.
-Alright.
What happened?
Why do you look so shaken?
The wallet's missing.
What do you mean?
I mean your brother's wallet
isn't in my pocket!
-What about yours?
-I never have any cash.
Whatever I earn,
I hand it over to my father.
Now?
Sir, I seem to have lost my wallet
Can we make some arrangements?
-Can I take these colas?
-Yeah, sure.
What happened?
I mortgaged the bike.
Hey! Take the motorcycle inside.
We'll get it back when we have money.
But how will we reach now?
There's still a week left for Holi.
Even if we go crawling,
we'll make it well in time.
Come on. Take this.
Hey, look. Looks like a hotel.
Sir, can we get a room?
-Do you have your ID card?
-Yes.
And hers?
She doesn't have one.
-How old is she?
We have a kid.
She just looks like a teenager.
So you left your kid with her mom or what?
Let's go.
My followers have shot up like crazy!
Yaqub is famous!
But not more than Ammi!
Hey, the sun is out.
Wake up.
Wake up, it's morning!
Mom, I don't want to
go to school, please!
I'm not your mom.
Now get up!
You?
What are you doing here?
Mom!
Come on. Let's leave. Pick up your stuff.
But where are we going?
Well, there's a road,
it must lead somewhere.
Shit!
I have a headache.
I need to go to work.
Who got me here?
We didn't do anything, right?
Can I sleep here a bit longer, please?
Please call your driver.
We couldn't find him last night.
Shut the door on your way out.
To enter the house of love,
or to break into it
are two very different things.
The first is legitimized with a ceremony.
Your love has a stamp of approval.
Then it depends on the couple
if they want to spend their lives
looking into each other's eyes
or into the distance.
Now the second option, of breaking in
requires you to brush up on the law.
Since what you're trying to steal
isn't yours.
If it were, you wouldn't have to steal it.
Even if we assume you're a master thief.
Love is your weakness
and breaking in, is your compulsion.
If you're getting restless
and are unable to accept
the indifference of your beloved,
then be warned
Those who start with breaking locks
end up breaking entire walls.
And then that broken-down ruin
becomes your home
And even if you're okay with it,
take a glance
at your passport and check
If age were a ladder,
which step are you on?
Do you have the time
to scale these solid walls?
Because, my friends
love's a lot of work,
and it comes at a price.
Because love takes
a whole lot of maintenance!
-Hi!
-Hello!
-I'm Ayesha.
-Hi.
-Harmeet's girlfriend.
-Okay.
Her Highness' whims cannot be stopped
A million hearts have been robbed
They've all been denied
So many victimized
Fellas who tried to make an impression
Long queues everywhere, all around
Their demands of love give me tension
I'm a big city girl
Small towns won't cut it
Take me to Vegas or forget it
Lunch in Shanghai
And dinner in Dubai
I keep flying high chasing action
I go to LA for shopping
My nightlife is rocking
I go to LA for shopping
My nightlife is rocking
Go boy, go on, buzz off!
Maintenance, my maintenance
-My super grand hi-fi maintenance
-Rosy!
Maintenance, my maintenance
My super grand hi-fi maintenance
Take my gold, take all my money
Take a flight to the stars, my honey
Take a lifetime's worth of maintenance
Mr. Happy, get all this stuff
into the house.
I'll pay it in dollars, your maintenance!
Harmeet!
Harmeet!
Yes, sir.
How are you?
I'm fine.
And your friend, Ayesha?
She's fine, she's sleeping.
-She's still at your home?
-She had a headache.
Oh.
A headache, I see.
Yes.
Can I get you a drink?
When Chamba used to fall under Punjab,
people from the plains would build
summer homes up here.
And leave them open in the winter
for people here to take shelter in.
Chamba used to fall under Punjab?
-Well, even India fell under England once!
-Shut up!
Talking such nonsense all the time.
There's a big lock.
What are you doing?
Do you want a house
to stay in till Holi or not?
You turned out to be quite the crook!
I don't have Amrita Shergil's talent,
but I have her rebellious spirit!
Meaning?
Meaning Mr. Yaqub,
Raziya commands you to get in!
Are you hungry?
Extremely! I'm starving.
Noodles?
Yeah.
Hey "Shergill," come here.
I'll show you some magic.
Look here! A remote without a TV!
And look there!
A TV without a remote!
Why?
Why, oh why?
Because there's a lock in between!
Noodles.
Look, my followers have increased so much!
I'm sure no one else gets this many likes!
10,000,000!
-One crore?
-Yeah, it says 1K.
K-A-R-O-D, crore!
1K means one thousand, silly.
It might be a thousand to you,
but to me, it's one crore!
We were all sleeping at home.
When we woke up in the morning,
my son's motorcycle was missing.
Then we realized our daughter
wasn't home either.
Is this your wallet?
It's mine.
They dropped it here.
From here, they could only go
towards Chamba or Pathankot.
So, Mr. Abrar?
Brother Abrar, salaam!
Walaikum salaam.
How are you?
I'm fine.
-You tell me.
-Where's Yaqub?
Yaqub?
He's nowhere to be seen.
What did he do now?
Harmeet, what is it you want?
As in?
As in, what do you want in life?
-Music.
-Then you should focus only on music!
-I am, sir.
-Then why
Thank you.
Can you excuse us, please?
Then why this girl?
This
Ayesha.
I don't know.
She is Sapna's friend.
She's been fired.
-What?
-Sapna.
Why?
She asked for too much money.
That doesn't matter.
Harmeet
you're my star.
Not Sapna.
Do you ever think of
what you want, what you don't want?
It's been six months
since you're playing music here.
Look, you can pay your rent.
That's fantastic.
But do you have any ambitions?
Or do you want to stay at
an artist residency your whole life?
I want to play music in India.
For Desis.
-But I feel like
-What?
That they won't accept me.
Why?
People call me a fake Desi.
That's just here.
That won't happen there!
I'll take you to India.
But I can't go there now.
Why?
There's a family issue.
Once someone picks up my songs
and they become hits
Going to India will become easier.
What's the issue?
I just created a song
for a music composer.
But no one wants to give credit.
You'll get credit.
Sooner or later, you will.
What's the issue?
Harmeet.
You can talk to me about anything.
Anything.
You can share it with me.
You just concentrate on your music.
And come stay at my place.
My mother will be so happy. She'll make
lentils and rice for you every day.
And you won't even have to pay rent.
How can we tolerate this?
She's our only daughter. She's our life!
He's taken her away from us.
But did she go of her own accord?
Or has she been abducted?
What do you mean, of her own accord?
Do you think you know our daughter
better than us?
I'm her father, after all.
We never stopped her from doing anything.
She always takes our permission.
Amrita Suri is a student at a school
in Dalhousie, and is still a minor.
Is everything okay?
-Yakub Siddiqui, a local resident
-Yeah.
is a 21-year-old man
-Want to go back?
-and has abducted this girl.
-No.
-Has "Love Jihad" struck again?
-Or is it something else?
-We'll only go back after Holi now.
Text us on the number below.
With cameraman Inderjeet,
this is Apoorva Mahajan reporting.
What do we do for five days now?
No one drinks in our house.
It's considered a sin in ours.
But outside the house, my brother drinks
every day along with his friends.
My father also drinks occasionally,
and prays for repentance the next day.
-Well, even Ghalib used to drink!
-Who's that?
What kind of Muslim are you?
You don't know Ghalib!
So what, will you crucify me now?
"Let me drink in the mosque," says Ghalib
"Or tell me the place
where there is no God."
Oh! That's a WhatsApp forward!
Then what does it mean?
How does one open it?
This is why girls shouldn't drink.
How do people drink this stuff?
Forget how! Why do they drink it?
-Want more?
-No.
Your eyes tell me secrets uninhibited
Your love has given me glory unlimited
Since you came into my life
My status updates have everyone psyched
My Instagram gets millions of likes
Since you came into my life
World
My world!
You've become my whole world
A rainbow-colored dream world
It's all thanks to you
Yes, it's true
My world!
This world of eternal springs
Of infinite stars and galaxies
Is this real life or just a fantasy?
A fantasy
my whole world
A rainbow-colored dream world
It's all thanks to you
Yes, it's true
My world!
This world of eternal springs
Brother.
They mortgaged the bike
for five thousand rupees.
And left your name too.
Said you'll come and pick it up.
They're in Chamba.
Hey, Harmeet.
Hey, Zito.
Did you put the curtains?
Your girlfriend.
-My girlfriend?
-Your girlfriend.
What did you do to my room?
And where's my mom's quilt?
My hand's bleeding.
I was making a sandwich.
I can't make anything else.
I was hungry.
Haven't eaten anything all day.
You didn't like what I did?
Now take your stuff, and leave.
Need help?
I'm sorry.
I just thought, who lives like this?
Just wanted to make you feel like home.
Ready, madam?
-Just go!
-And all this stuff?
Give it to your wife.
What do you want?
You.
How do you know?
What?
How do you know you want me?
I I just know.
I've known for a while.
What do you want?
Why are you so mad at me?
I feel scared of you.
Why?
It's the way you look at me.
I'm sorry.
I'm just stupid.
I don't know what to do.
I don't know what this is!
I just know
I haven't felt this way before.
I've been with many boys,
but it's never been like this.
I don't know what kind
of connection this is
You tell me, what should I do?
How do I deal with this feeling,
or should I just ignore it?
I'll do whatever you say.
I just wanna be close to you.
Please.
These people are corrupting our sisters.
They should be sent back to their country.
Don't you think this is their country too?
How? You were given a place,
go stay there.
What are you doing here?
Your father's calling.
Hello.
Dad, salaam alaikum.
Dad, no
I just made a Ting Tong video,
See how much my followers have increased.
Dad, no.
We're just going
to attend a music concert.
We'll both come back after that.
Son, where are you?
Son?
He's lying.
These days you can trace a person's
location through their phone, right?
See where he is.
Come on, find out quickly.
-Hello.
-Hello, Mom. Amrita.
Where are you?
You've brought us such shame.
Your father, brother
Everyone's worried.
People are saying all kinds of things
Hello?
Hello?
If you shout, I'll hang up again.
Where are you?
Let me talk to Dad.
If you want to speak to him,
call on his phone.
He's not home.
Did she say anything?
Where is she?
Come on, there must be
something you found out?
Did you hear any sounds in the background?
Whether she was calling
from a highway with traffic,
or from near a river or canal,
or in the mountains?
Didn't you hear anything?
Don't you think your family's
making too big a deal of this?
Maybe it really has become
a very big deal.
As in?
I mean, my family's reputation
is getting tainted
because I ran away from home,
that too with a Muslim boy.
We're committing "Love Jihad"
and bringing "dishonor" to my family
Come on. Let's get a drink.
Open up your heart and say something
Your silences are killing me
Come closer a little
With a smile or a giggle
Don't hold back, let yourself go
Bit by bit
Step by step
You know what our problem is?
We approach love like a blind man
in a dark room
chasing after a black cat
that isn't even there.
Mr. Gulzar has said this about love,
"It's like a delicate, elusive scent
don't try to grab it with your hands
or taint it with labels."
But the jean-jacket, love-locket,
comb-in-the-back-pocket greasers
aren't gonna get it!
There once lived an old woman
She used to stitch and mend torn clothes.
One day, she was looking
for something outside her house.
People asked her,
"Lady, what are you looking for?"
She said, "I seem to have lost my needle."
"Where did you drop it?", they asked.
"Inside the house," said she.
People were surprised. They asked,
"If the needle has fallen inside,
why are you looking for it outside?"
The old woman faced the crowd and said,
"You rascals!
You're also just searching outside.
No one takes a look inside.
That's why you bring
your tattered selves for me to mend."
So coming back to Mr. Gulzar,
"Love is just a feeling,
feel it in your soul.
Don't label it, let love be love alone."
Finally! You do something
that normal people do.
You don't need to be so perfect, you know.
One beer won't kill you.
What language were you talking
in on that day, on Skype?
You heard?
German.
You know, I thought you were
from an Indian village.
The way you speak in Hindi
Sapna thinks you're a bumpkin.
That's how we speak Hindi
in our native place.
You should hear my dad speak.
Your ears will bleed.
What does your dad do?
You don't want to know.
Why?
He works
He just works all the time.
He bangs his secretary, he bangs CFOs.
He bangs supermodels,
he bangs actresses, wannabe actresses!
My mother bangs her gym trainer.
And my mother used to be his gym trainer
While he was married to his first wife.
And we're just the
Great English Banging Family!
So, cheers to that!
Wake up.
It's morning.
Will you have tea?
Shall I make some?
In a while.
Son, are you up?
Want breakfast?
Aunty, I can barely boil water!
My father makes amazing mince parathas.
He adds ginger, green chilies,
and egg to it. It's delicious!
I bet you've never had parathas like that.
Oh, you don't eat meat.
Oh, she's here.
Sweetheart, will you have breakfast?
The noodles we had that day were expired!
Come, sit.
Sorry, we mistook this to be our house.
Brush your teeth, child.
Have some piping hot aloo parathas.
I told them all about DJ Mohabbat!
Have some parathas.
Don't you think we should leave?
Where will we go?
There are still four days until Holi,
and besides, what are our options?
Why did we have to run away
so much in advance?
I wasn't thinking then.
What if they call my father?
They are very cute.
You know, they have a son in Germany.
A grandson too.
Aunty says he looks just like me.
Do you have anything
other than lentils and rice?
Yeah, doner kebab.
I love Turkish food.
Doner kebab is German.
In fact, it was first made in Berlin.
Before that,
in Germany, you'd only get sausages,
curried sausages, and sauerkraut.
Nothing other than cabbage grew there.
When I was a kid there, my father went
home to Punjab only once in two years.
And I loved
to eat there whenever I visited.
Lentils and rice, roti, sabzi,
flatbread with chickpeas.
Then he came out
and his family disowned him.
Now if he goes back
to Punjab his own family might kill him.
When did he come out?
I was eight then.
Must've been so hard for your mom.
How did she--
He's a very cool dad.
-And your mom?
-She's cool too.
Do they still talk?
They love each other.
Very hot, yeah.
Hello, my love, you seem happy!
Yeah, Mom.
Have you met someone?
Son, he looks just like you.
Must be as old as you.
We had big paddy fields
and the kids were fond of studies.
We sent Harminder
to Germany, to study engineering.
He was fond of building cars.
Then God knows what happened to him.
Son, he married a Nazi!
She poisoned his mind so badly
He never returned.
He left his home.
Even his child!
And went and married a man!
Ever heard of such a thing?
How can a man marry a man?
And his wife
was very clever.
She spoke Punjabi. She learned it.
She even spoke Hindi.
But she was a Nazi, after all.
It made no difference to her
that our son was marrying another man.
All she cares about is money.
We were humiliated. The kids fell out.
They fought amongst themselves.
The land and property all got divided.
Then what would we oldies do there?
So we came here.
Our grandkids visit sometimes.
But
Harmeet never comes.
He never came.
Child.
When I saw you sleeping in bed
I was reminded of him.
Look, his nose is exactly like yours.
All we wish for now
is to meet Harmeet once.
What What do you think two men
do with each other?
Love.
My father must be really worried.
I don't care what he thinks.
He doesn't know the truth
But he must be missing me.
He loves me, after all.
Should we go back?
Just because I'm thinking out loud,
doesn't mean I want to go back.
Sorry.
Look at them.
They're upset because their son
didn't turn out the way they wanted.
But at least he's happy.
Wherever he is,
even if he's married a guy.
What matters is that he's happy.
I also wonder what
two men do with each other.
Who cares?
Whether they hang upside-down
like bats or eat lying down.
-Yes.
-At least they're happy.
What are you trying to say?
I don't know anymore.
I just feel like crying.
Lend me your shoulder.
I'm not asking you to lift a corpse.
Your shoulder.
Why is this world like this?
Why?
Why can't people just be happy?
And why are people offended
and insulted so easily?
What's this big deal about "honor"?
And why is honor destroyed
only when people fall in love?
Love ain't a knife
that can rip apart
a family's honor, is it?
Why are people so ashamed
when their children fall in love
with someone?
Tell me, TingTongians
If we cannot make our own decisions
and every choice we make requires
a familial stamp of approval
then how are we humans anymore?
We're computer-programmed robots!
Tell me TingTongians,
am I wrong about this?
I'm really sad today.
In a world
where people are dying of hunger,
folks don't have money to survive.
Where Antarctica is turning
hot like Delhi
and it's snowing in Baghdad.
Where there's no guarantee
that the Earth will survive or not.
There the people's biggest problems
are love and music.
Love and music!
And that goddamn DJ Mohabbat's music.
That DJ Mohabbat ruined my life.
I set out to hear his songs,
and what a shitstorm it caused!
Ammi's veil came off.
Now do what you want to.
-Are you Harmeet Singh?
-Yes.
Turn around, please.
Put your hands behind your back.
Come on, let's go.
Where's Harmeet?
Why are the cops here?
When I was ten, they gave me
Amrita Pritam's books to read.
They made me like this.
If they gave her books to you,
then what did she read?
Idiot!
Amrita Pritam was a writer.
Like you're a clown!
But then I don't know what happened.
Suddenly, everything changed.
They took my phone away.
The books were all gone,
and everyone turned vegetarian.
And I, who was vegetarian
since I was a child,
was told that I'd gotten out of hand.
People don't get wiser with age.
In fact, they become stupider.
I don't understand anything you say.
But I know that
whatever you say is always awesome.
No matter what I say, I do miss my dad.
Then call him from the market.
Even if they see the number, so what?
ABDUCTION.
FORMER MLA BALDEV SURI'S
MINOR DAUGHTER, AMRITA SURI IS MISSING.
THIS IS A CASE OF LOVE JIHAD.
What happened?
They've put up our posters everywhere.
-What do you mean?
-Look around.
Come on, Amrita! Let's go!
Booked for raping a minor,
daughter of a Pakistani billionaire.
You're famous.
You're on every front page.
I just feel very scared.
-That man won't die, right?
-He'll be fine. Come on.
Please come back, my child! Please.
BOY ON THE RUN AFTER ABDUCTING A GIRL.
THE CONSPIRACY BEHIND LOVE AND MUHAMMAD.
Please come back, sweetheart!
Watch this helpless father,
crying tears of blood.
Yet another victim of "Love Jihad."
Look at him begging
for his daughter's safe return.
Look at him and tell me,
is our religion not under threat?!
The clothes have dried,
and I've picked them up.
Aunty
Son, you shouldn't have lied to us.
-Aunty, I didn't lie to you.
-Shut up! Get outside.
I know everything.
It's been on the TV since morning.
It's on my WhatsApp as well.
Aunty, he didn't lie about anything.
What did you say?
My child
My child, this is that Nazi poison
that you're unaware of.
The poison that took
my son away from me.
What nonsense is this?
You were okay a minute ago,
and now you've turned into a zombie.
We are leaving.
Now you can sit at home
and stare at TV news and WhatsApp.
Let's go!
Think about it carefully, my child.
Otherwise, your family too
will be humiliated like us.
He's a Muslim.
He's allowed four marriages!
-Four marriages
-Let's go!
Come on!
We will kill you!
Hey, motherfucker, you'll die.
You'll die so soon!
-You gonna die!
-You gonna die!
-No please, no!
-Welcome to our club.
Turn around so that
I can see your ass, sweetie!
You lie still like that. Youre gonna die.
I am gonna torture you!
I don't know why she filed a case
Mom, please tell Dad.
I didn't do anything!
I just met her at the club.
I don't even know who she is,
or whose daughter she is.
Mom!
Dad, please get me out of here!
Isn't this all becoming a bit much?
Maybe I should just go
to the police station instead?
My family will calm down
and we won't have to keep running anymore.
What about Mohabbat?
I'll go another time!
I'm sure there will be more concerts.
So you'll go back on your words?
What do you mean?
You made grand declarations
on Ting Tong, ran from home
and now you'll give up on everything?
Ammi said those things.
I don't think Ammi will be
back on Ting Tong again.
What are you saying?
This isn't you!
Man, I'm exhausted.
What are we doing?
We're just waiting for Holi to arrive.
We have no plan,
no money, and no purpose.
You said people get stupider
as they get older.
But you've lost it overnight!
I can't see my father crying like this!
He's shedding crocodile tears!
Is there no one in your life
who you really love?
Is there?
No matter how my father is
Right, he's still your father!
He really loves you!
He only loves his reputation!
His family's reputation.
There's this "Ammi" on Ting Tong.
Do you follow her?
She posted a video today. Will you see it?
You won't understand. Let it be!
You'll go back, but what about me?
So come with me!
I may not be as smart as you,
or educated
But I know something
that you'll never understand.
What, man?!
That my name is
Yaqub!
Nothing's going to happen to you.
My father will listen to me.
You carry on.
We can't just land up there suddenly.
I'll see you later.
Trust me.
Goodbye.
There's nothing to fear.
Hey.
Smoke?
Take it.
You need to toughen yourself up a bit.
You're gonna carry on catching a good
hiding in here if you carry on like this.
You want some coffee?
Drink some coffee.
You're gonna have
to face them all again in the morning.
Dad, sorry!
I just went to see a concert.
But when I saw you crying, I came back.
Dad, sorry.
Sorry.
A plate of noodles, please.
Salaam to all you TingTongians from Yaqub!
My father says, love as you please
and whoever you please.
But to express that love or grasp it,
isn't in everyone's destiny.
I couldn't unite my love with hers.
I never stood a chance.
I was too far back in the queue.
-Madam?
-Yes?
-Is there a bus leaving for Chandigarh?
-Yes.
-What time?
-In 30 minutes to an hour.
Look behind the buses.
Check inside and around the buses.
What are you waiting for? Go!
Check the stands!
I want him caught in five minutes!
Hey! Stop, stop!
Stop!
Catch him! Now!
Stop!
Since you came into my life
World
My world!
You've become my whole world
A rainbow-colored dream world
It's all thanks to you
Yes, it's true
My world!
This world of eternal springs
Of infinite stars and galaxies
Got me wrecked
This love got me wrecked
It had me deceived
This love's a disease
Got me wrecked
This love got me wrecked
It had me deceived
THREE YEARS LATER
This love's a disease
This love's a scorpion
It dug its claws in me
Had me ensnared
Stung me without mercy
Thumped its chest, then ran away
This nasty, nasty bug
Slyly bit and slinked away
It hid under the rug
My pain has seen this mourning come
What to do?
No prayer can make it come undone
What to do?
I cut them off, I broke away
From all my bonds and ties
I broke away
Left behind this rotten world
Of false dreams and lies
I broke away
Got me wrecked
This love got me wrecked
It had me deceived
This love's a disease
You want it? You gotta earn it!
There is no sleep
The pain goes deep
There is no sleep
Tears have run dry
Smiles have gone awry
Step back.
Tears have run dry
Lightning has struck
My world is stuck
I'm unafraid of fear itself
It trails me like a shadow
What to do?
I'm drenched in darkness
This stain will never go
What to do?
I cut them off, I broke away
From all my bonds and ties
I broke away
Left behind this rotten world
Of false dreams and lies
Some good news.
That girl.
She's an adult now.
She's actually put out a statement
to say that you were innocent.
She was drunk, and you
-The pain goes deep
-It had me deceived
Love got me messed
Tears have run dry
Got me wrecked
Dad, you carry on.
I'll come back in a few days.
Why do you want to stay here?
Not here.
I want to go somewhere. Alone.
Harmeet!
Harmeet!
Harmeet!
Harmeet?
Harmeet!
Sorry.
-I've come to explain!
-Get out!
-Please let me explain!
-I don't need it.
Just once, please!
Just hear me once. Please, let me talk!
Harmeet, my dad called the cops.
I didn't know anything.
My driver told them where I was.
And he just assumed things.
Harmeet, I never lied to you.
Nothing I said or did was a lie.
You were underage!
You lied the moment you entered the club
with your fake ID card.
Do not screw with my head!
I've come to apologize.
I did whatever I could!
Hired my own lawyer.
Withdrew the case and told the truth.
I did it.
They even forced me to sign the documents.
I couldn't do anything about it.
Do you have any idea what
I've gone through in the last three years?
I just wanted to play my music.
And now, I can't even hear it.
You snatched my whole life away from me!
I didn't mean to!
You didn't mean to?
Then what did you mean,
you privileged brat?!
I wasn't your toy!
No matter who did it,
the damage is done now!
Now get lost from here,
before I kill and bury you.
If you think it'll make you feel better,
then just do it!
-Just leave!
-I won't!
Just leave!
Not until I make this right, I won't go!
You wanna make things right?
Cool, come. Let's make them right!
Now it feels right. Get out!
Just like my father!
Who do you think you are?
I'm saying sorry, am I not?
-You think I can't hit you back?
-Come, hit me.
Please, I'm saying sorry.
I can't hear it.
Should I just kill myself?
Will that satisfy you?
-I think that would be a blessing!
-Please.
-You should do that!
-No, please!
Take your expensive car
and go bang it up somewhere!
So hard that your fancy airbags
worth millions can't save you.
You'll do your father
and me a really big favor.
Such is my situation
I follow you in every direction
It's too goddamn intense
Our crazy star-crossed connection
You started by laying conditions
I saw you and gave into emotion
It's so damn sick
Our crazy star-crossed connection
Connection
Listen to me now
You gotta hear me out
The heart wants a solution
This heart demands a solution
To our crazy star-crossed connection
Connection
It started as a crush
Then we fell in love
Like a sign from above
Show me your Kardashian style
And all that cool stuff
How long do I clear the debris
Of the tsunami you unleashed
My road to love grew toxic
Chasing your elusive blue tick
I altered the whole constitution
To attain you
I got rid of two sections
It is a lot more than I bargained for
Our crazy star-crossed connection
Connection
I was in my car,
I saw her coming very fast and
She got very badly injured.
I came to help
What were you doing
when the accident took place?
-I was sleeping in my car.
-Sleeping in your car?
She was going really fast
and she got really badly
Did you get any injuries?
Oh my, so much love!
Well, your "love" reminds me of a story.
Want to hear it?
-Yes!
-Yes, please!
Once upon a time,
a Lover stood on Love's door.
-Who was at Love's door?
-A Lover!
A Lover!
He stood knocking on the door,
ringing the bell.
A voice rang out,
"Who is it?"
The Lover said, "It's me."
But Love didn't answer.
The Lover stood, persistent.
The door didn't open,
no voice beckoned
Bereft of hope,
he walked out of the alley of Love.
And reached the bazaar.
It was chock-a-block with lovers
till his eyes could see.
And each of them was drunk in love.
But love eluded them.
The bazaar offers all forms of relief.
Balms, and medicine for all grief.
Distraction to your heart's desire!
But the Lover was seeking something else.
He was a true lover.
So he treads up that door again
knocking gently.
And a voice said,
-Who is it?
-Who is it?
Who is it?
-This time he said, "It is you."
-It is you!
"Just you."
Because friends
love starts with "you".
What am I?
Because "I" is the dead-end of every road,
where everything comes to a halt.
So it is only love when
It is you!
You can't control it with religion
Nor at gunpoint will it transition
Love shall bring the revolution
Love shall bring the revolution
As long as the heart beats out loud
Freedom's flame won't be put out
Love shall bring the revolution
Love shall bring the revolution
Love has many sides, my friend.
Love doesn't ask for permission.
It just strikes without warning.
And at the worst possible time.
And the problems of love
evolve with society.
Society defines the boundaries of love.
And when love is boundless
we mistake our vulnerability for weakness.
And then we try to suppress it.
We hide our vulnerability.
Why?
Because society shames us for it.
And if a guy acts vulnerable
then he's simply not man enough.
After all
we gotta prove our manliness, bro!
Vulnerability is for pussies.
That's what they say, right?
But you know what?
If you have that vulnerability within you
it's the most beautiful thing.
Mohabbat!
Its power is humble,
just like the winter sun.
It may seem feeble at first
But when night falls
That's when you realize
It was the sun's gentle warmth
that kept you alive all day!
It's so nice and sunny today!
-Lovely.
-I hope it doesn't rain.
So this Holi, DJ Mohabbat is coming
with his "Almost Love" concert
from beachy Goa,
straight to the mountains
At a secret location near Manali.
Why secret, you ask?
Because like every year
We do not have police permission, fellas!
One week to go.
Find out and get there.
48 hours, non-stop music.
Come, feel the love.
See you there.
There's a bloke
There's a girl
They're deep in love
But flat-out broke
Instant noodle is all they eat
This friendship is oh, so sweet
Two vagabond hearts fall in love and swoon
They're doomed
Two vagabond hearts fall in love and swoon
Two vagabond hearts fall in love and swoon
They're doomed
Two vagabond hearts fall in love and swoon
About the world, no fucks given
Chilling is their religion
Marching to the beat of their own drum
They call themselves the crazy ones
Two vagabond hearts fall in love and swoon
They're doomed
Two vagabond hearts fall in love and swoon
They're doomed
Two vagabond hearts fall in love and swoon
They're doomed
Two vagabond hearts fall in love and swoon
LONDON
Harmeet!
Yes, sir.
That was sick!
-Thank you.
-Very good indeed. Well done!
Thank you, sir.
See you tomorrow.
See you, sir.
Lentils and rice?
-Goodnight, sir.
-Goodnight.
Harmeet!
Come here.
I want to introduce you to someone.
-This is my friend, Ayesha.
-Hi!
Ayesha
-Nice to meet you.
-Namaste, miss.
-"Miss"! So cute.
-Sorry?
We're having an after-party at my place.
That's great.
Will you come?
No, I need to get home.
I have work in the morning, so
Just one drink. It won't kill you.
I don't really drink.
Can I take a selfie?
Yeah?
I don't have my phone.
Do you have your phone?
You left your phone, right?
I did, yes.
Can I use your phone, please?
I'll take the picture
and send it to myself.
Yes.
Okay.
Actually, I prefer the other angle.
Can I take it from there?
No, that's no good.
Sorry, I'll just take a few more.
Let me take it! Come on.
Thanks.
Is that good? Be careful of my nose.
And we're done!
Yeah, this is good. Can I
-I'll send it to my number.
-Okay?
I've saved my number. Ayesha.
Ayesha Salim Phgura.
-Okay. Bye, Harmeet.
-Thank you.
DALHOUSIE
Love!
Love!
Love!
Love!
Love!
Love!
Greetings to all you
TingTongians out there
from your beloved Saloni Ammi!
Not by breaths
Not by steps
The world moves because of love
Not by breaths
Not by steps
The world moves because of love
Not because of wealth
Not because of strength
The world moves because of love!
Love!
Love!
Brother!
Love!
Love!
Granny.
Greetings to all you
TingTongians out there
from your beloved Saloni Ammi!
Tell me something, who is this "Mohabbat"?
And where the hell is he?
I even got a divorce because of him!
What is he?
He says, life's all about love.
He raises your hopes.
Then he says, meet me on Holi!
At least give us an address, mister!
What's this rubbish you keep watching?!
Phones have ruined this generation!
This is what they do all day.
That's why we didn't give her a phone.
It must be okay in "their" community
Begging for a guy's number
In front of the whole world!
Amrita!
You're running late!
Mom, I'm coming!
-Sanju. Drop your sister at the bus stop.
-Yes.
Salaam alaikum.
Walaikum salaam.
Dad, how much worth of DVDs
do you think I'll sell today?
Four thousand.
Five.
I'll hand you the money by evening.
Junior! Fancy a lollipop?
I'll get DJ Mohabbat's number by evening.
Tell me if you want to go.
We can catch the bus from here.
Find an excuse to leave home
for two days, and that too on Holi.
Hey!
What's up with him?
Must've gone to call my brother.
Why?
Because you're talking to me.
Is talking to you a crime?
Only my brother can tell you that.
Will he beat me up?
I don't know.
When a guy talks to a girl,
what does her brother usually do?
Depends on who the brother is.
All brothers aren't the same, right?
My brother would thrash
any guy who talks to me.
How come he hasn't thrashed me?
Because he doesn't know yet.
Lollipop?
-He definitely looks pissed.
-Best of luck!
I'll see you on Holi, outside the school.
Holi's still a week away!
-Okay then, bye!
-Catch him!
Stop, you rascal!
Catch him!
Get the scoundrel! Get him!
Do not let him get away! Catch him!
Climb up!
How do I catch him,
he's like a goddamn monkey!
Over there!
Stop!
Climb up!
-There he goes.
-Let's get him!
Stop!
How far will you run?!
-You'll come down sooner or later.
-Stop, fucker!
Catch him!
-Stop!
-Come down!
Catch him!
Catch.
Come down!
Where's your son?
-What happened, my boy?
-Where's your son Yakub?
-You used to call me "Uncle," right?
-Those days are long gone!
-Where is he?
-But what happened?
-Wait here, I'll check ahead.
-What's the matter, my child?
You people better stay within your limits.
Be grateful that we let you live here!
It started as a crush
Then we fell in love
Like a sign from above
Show me your Kardashian style
Kardashian!
Sir, think about "Kardashian style."
Like, Kim Kardashian!
Huge, sir. Huge!
Sir, take it from me.
This song will be a millennial anthem.
Of the millennials, by a millennial!
Do you have any idea
what a music producer's credit
is worth in the market?
Huge!
Don't think of India.
They may not understand.
But here, everyone gets it.
Look. I'll be the music composer.
And you? The music producer!
I'll be the horse
And you, the jockey!
You'll play derby on my back
in the Indian Music Industry!
Plus, I'll give you 10,000 pounds.
I'm offering you a great deal!
Get it?
I'll mention you in every interview.
Trust me.
"If it wasn't for this boy,
this song wouldn't exist!"
I'll make you a sensation!
Everyone will want to know,
"Who is Harmeet?"
"Who is Harmeet?"
Look, sell me the song.
You'll be set for life.
If you don't give me the song,
it won't feature in the film.
It won't become an anthem.
No one will know who you are.
She screams, what-the-hell
She's always raising hell
This girl's crazy
She's always spinning lies
Her ego's epic-sized
This girl's crazy
-She stings at random
-She stings!
-And laughs with abandon
-She laughs!
She reveals new colors
Her many crazy colors
She'll make you dance
To her whims and fancies
So let go, let go!
Thats like a Woman Desi!
Thats like a Woman Desi!
Rosy!
Life's a celebration
Let the party go on
It's the biggest high
If it must, let it rise
Dreaming with open eyes
Oh yeah, that's life
Throwing colors at you
Each day a fresh hue
Oh yeah, that's life
She'll give you life lessons
Her swag leaves an impression
Stare you down bit by bit
She'll give you tons of shit
Her temper's always rising
And she ain't apologizing
So let go, let go!
Thats like a Woman Desi!
Thats like a Woman Desi!
Did you record him?
No, I was recording you.
Don't lie!
-Dude, you're such a freak!
-He frigging ignores me!
He didn't even look at me. Not once.
-Babe, he--
-Not once!
-Babe, he ignores everybody.
-I straightened my hair for him.
I perform with him and he doesn't even
No one has ever rejected me. Not once.
I think he's gay.
Shut up. Just shut up.
Everybody hits on me, okay?
-DJs. Musicians, singers
-He didn't even reply with "Miss."
Nothing!
He didn't even hit on me.
Next time, I'll get you some pickles.
-Mom makes this amazing mango pickle
-Hi!
You didn't reply to me? I'd texted you.
Mind if I eat with you?
I haven't had Indian food in ages.
My mom made this, especially for him.
Cool. May I?
Sure.
I am 18, you know?
Should I speak in Hindi?
My name's Ayesha.
I am 18 years old.
I can do whatever I want.
And you can reply to me freely.
So now, can I buy you a drink?
Please.
I don't drink, miss.
Then what do you do?
You're not a saint, right?
Do you think I'm pretty?
You can say it aloud.
Why is he like this?
Why are you like this?
Why is he like this?
I had frigging lentils and rice with him!
Oh, baby
How can a guy who eats bland lentils
and rice digest spicy butter chicken?
He says he's from Germany, but
When he talks, he sounds
like a village bumpkin.
Oh, so first he was gay,
and now he's a bumpkin?
Of course!
He's gay or he's a bumpkin!
In fact, I think he might have
a wife back in his village.
Maybe kids too.
I'm telling you.
I've dated a lot of Punjabi guys
in my time.
Botti is the word. It means wife.
Maybe he has a Botti.
But what's his deal?
He's not exactly Ranveer Singh, you know!
He's definitely not Ranveer Singh.
Exactly. I have to frigging decode him.
No, nope.
No. Come on.
We're going to find you a nice,
straight boy
who loves butter chicken.
We love by choice, not by chance.
But by the time we understand this
Our entire lives have swept past.
Hey, quickly move.
Salaam alaikum, sir.
What's going on?
Nothing!
Just admiring the park. It's so beautiful.
-What's up?
-Hand over your scooter keys.
-What's going on?
-Your scooter keys!
Get inside the car.
-Where are you taking me, sir?
-Get inside!
Get inside!
That which you want to
own like property
That's not love.
That is self-validation.
This is the root cause of all problems.
Initially, you like someone
Whether they know it or not.
And they, our object of affection,
are happy on their own trip.
Because suddenly it's sunny days
after years of stormy seas.
Little does he know
that this gentle breeze
is really a deadly shitstorm
of gross self-validation.
And he only sees it
when he's in the eye of the storm.
So what does he do?
He rejects it because he gets scared.
He was never ready
for this emotional cyclone.
What did he want? Simple, easy love.
And what did he get?
A complicated math equation.
Where RHS is yes, and LHS is no.
My grandpa used to say,
Son, if you can't take her "no,"
you're not worthy of her "yes."
Such is the tragedy of love.
It's often unrequited
and only unrequited love is romantic.
After all, what fun is love
if it doesn't make for a great story?
So bringing you stories of romance
is DJ Mohabbat playing live tonight
exclusively for the Desis
of Sunrise Radio.
Thank you. Cheers! Thank you.
Thank you.
Hello, sir!
Big fan.
I've heard all your podcasts on Notify.
I love your music, sir.
And I also love the way
you talk about love.
What do you do?
Sir, I'm a DJ too.
I play music just like you.
Want me to listen to your music?
Yes, sir. If you have the time.
What's your name?
I'm Harmeet.
Have we met before?
No, sir.
Sure?
Yes, sir.
Your face looks really familiar.
Where
Ting Tong!
That viral Ting Tong video, right?
What was it you were saying
"I couldn't unite my love with hers.
I couldn't make it past the queue."
It was you, of course!
Really?
I'm not even on Ting Tong!
Not here, in India. Somewhere in Himachal.
I'm dying to go to India!
Turn that way.
Now this side.
Of course, it's you!
What's your name again?
-Harmeet?
-Yaqub!
Yaqub! I remember
Hold on. I might have the video too.
Here it is.
Put these on.
Watch.
Greetings from Yaqub
to all you TingTongians.
My father says, love as you please
and whoever you please.
But to express that love or grasp it,
isn't in everyone's destiny.
It is you, right?
Please, sir! At least tell me
why you're hitting me?
Unless you tell me what I'm accused of,
how will you know if I'm guilty or not?
-Did you harass Mr. Suri's daughter today?
-No, sir!
We received a complaint.
It is utterly false, sir!
Yaqub never troubles women.
Ask anyone in the hood.
In fact, girls feel safe in the area
only because Yaqub lives there.
So, Suri's sons made a false complaint?
Sir, Mr. Suri's daughter loves movies.
I sell DVDs-
I only show their daughter movies
And because she's cute,
I don't charge her money-
What's "cute"?
-It's a word.
-What does it mean?
I don't exactly know. But I can tell you
what's cute and what's not.
I'm cute because
I'm telling you what cute is.
This gentleman is cute because he
didn't know for how long he had to hit me.
Stay away from Mr. Suri's daughter
from now on.
We plan to attend a music concert
on Holi.
No. Forget about it.
Sir, she wants to come.
If I see you within half a kilometer
of Mr. Suri's house
But my house falls within that radius!
-Should I not even go home?
-Now scoot!
Yes.
What?
Get your act together.
And I'll personally drop your scooter
at your house within a month.
Understood?
Now get going.
Abrar?
Yes, salaam.
You know of Mr. Suri's son, right?
Yeah, the one who organized
the temple ceremony.
Yes. Just beware of him.
Both you and Yaqub.
Since when have you been talking to him?
Ever since he's been talking to me.
And what do you talk about?
He just talks nonsense. I listen.
His nonsense is fun.
Brother, he's taking her to see Mohammed.
Mohammed?
Not Mohammed, stupid. Mohabbat.
That lowlife wants to take you out?
That is "their" modus operandi.
Seduce you with fairy tales,
then lock you in a veil!
Mom, stop being paranoid!
Mohabbat is a DJ. He makes music.
All the kids listen to his songs.
DJ Mohabbat?
Yes.
Listening to all these songs
has corrupted you.
Brother! Mom!
Don't talk to me!
And let go of the curtain!
Do as your brother says.
Have I committed a sin?
He spoke to me, and I responded.
What's the big deal?
What did you say?
To what?
When he asked you
to come and see Mohabbat with him?
-Nothing.
-What did you say?
I said, "Holi is still a week away."
As in?
As in, DJ Mohabbat's concert is on Holi.
So you didn't say no?
I challenged him.
If under your watch,
he can whisk me off to the concert
he must be worth something, right?
Get inside.
Leave the curtain and get inside.
Come on. Inside.
Quickly. Sit here.
No school for you till Holi.
You will stay at home.
Stay here and listen
to whatever songs you want.
Brother.
At least give me your phone
so that I can play songs.
Nice beats.
Thank you, sir!
The kids must be tripping
on this music, right?
Yes, sir. They dance--
It sounds cool.
But it's missing one thing, you.
As in, sir?
Like love is all about the other.
Music must be all about the self.
Harmeet's music should embody him, right?
Where he came from,
where he is, and where he's headed
Harmeet Who is he?
The Harmeet I find here is hanging
between his childhood and youth.
He's gonna get screwed, dude!
Headphone.
-Where's Amrita?
-No clue!
Granny, where's Amrita?
-Who are you, son?
-I'm Yaqub.
Yaqub.
Are you Muslim?
Yes, Granny.
Are you Hindu?
Well, I've been one since I was born.
Wow, I've been a Muslim
ever since I was born too!
It would be so cool
if after we grew up,
we could go to a shop,
and buy the religion of our choice.
If you had the choice, would you
I'd probably never visit the shop.
By the way, where's Amrita?
Are you Amrita's friend?
I don't know yet.
I'll ask her and tell you.
She's upstairs.
Hello, miss!
Amrita.
You?
What are you doing here?
The school van left without you,
so I figured something was wrong.
This is our chance.
Everyone's asleep right now.
-So?
-So
So many people dream of
running from home
But not everyone gets the chance.
We'll return after Holi. What do you say?
Check the right side.
The keys must be there.
Is it there?
Hey! Noodles!
Forget the old school
These are the new rules
Smartphones get bills paid
And get you laid
Hey, yo!
One shot of tequila, please.
The vibe's sick and grungy
It gives me thrills like PUBG
Come on, come over
Come on, come over
Leave the crowd and wait for me until
Netflix and chill!
Baby!
Netflix and chill!
Baby!
Netflix and chill!
Baby!
Netflix and chill!
Baby!
One more.
On either side or all around
She sits, lies down, or stretches out
Like bright sunlight or dark as night
Come on
Put a status on WhatsApp
Where are you?
Everyone stop bothering me!
I've told you so many times
not to park here!
Mr. Happy, you please go home.
And take the car with you.
I don't want the car
to be seen here. Please.
I'll get home, don't worry about me.
The Love-mobile drives on
Often wonky or straight on
It runs on its own will
Let the beer foam rise up
Let your touch fire me up
The night is getting better still
Go on, why don't you order?
Go on, why don't you order?
Some momos and munchies
Via the app, pay the bill
Netflix and chill!
Baby!
Netflix and chill!
Baby!
Netflix and chill!
Baby!
Netflix and chill!
Netflix! Netflix! Netflix and chill!
Sorry guys, excuse me. Coming through.
Excuse me, ladies.
-Is she okay?
-I don't think so.
-Can someone call Sapna, please?
-Sir, I'm trying to reach her.
Maybe her phone died.
-Did you text her?
-Yes, it's undelivered.
She saw her throwing up, right?
-Yes, sir.
-And still, she's disappeared?
Harmeet
Yes, sir?
Is something on between the two of you?
I mean, you can tell me if there is.
No, sir. There's nothing like that.
Just focus on your music right now.
Okay?
-These spoilt girls with rich daddies
-What's your problem?
Do you have an issue with me?
Just because I threw up
and passed out in your car,
do you think you can say anything?
You're manipulating him.
Whatever we have between us,
that's none of your business.
Hey, that's my brother's wallet!
Yeah, I mean the motorcycle's his too.
He carries my photo with him.
Well, brothers are meant
to protect their sisters, right?
Here, take this.
Come.
How's it going, citizens of Ting Tong?
All good?
Greetings from your beloved Saloni Ammi!
Tell me something, TingTongians
What's your scene?
Do you have any spirit
of adventure in you?
While you all sat talking
and twiddling your thumbs
This boy here pulled off
what none of you could.
Come here, boy!
Love!
Love!
Love!
Love!
-Tell me something
-Isn't she the same girl?
-What's your scene?
-The one I keep seeing everywhere.
-Do you have any spirit of adventure
-Totally shameless. Disgusting.
This burkha-clad girl
you're calling shameless
-It's Amrita.
-twiddling your thumbs.
-See?
-This boy here pulled off
-We didn't give her a phone.
-what none of you could.
So she's making Ting Tong videos
with that boy's phone.
-What?
-Look!
I don't need a girlfriend.
As it is, I don't fit in.
I don't know how to perform
when I play music.
I'm still so self-conscious.
Find a woman and see
how she changes your confidence.
I don't need a girl to change my life.
Hey
-Get the stand out.
-What's a stand?
Move.
Oh.
Make it a full tank, please.
-Want some cola?
-Yeah.
Two colas, please.
-Here you go.
-How much?
50 rupees.
-Hold on, I'll get my wallet.
-Alright.
What happened?
Why do you look so shaken?
The wallet's missing.
What do you mean?
I mean your brother's wallet
isn't in my pocket!
-What about yours?
-I never have any cash.
Whatever I earn,
I hand it over to my father.
Now?
Sir, I seem to have lost my wallet
Can we make some arrangements?
-Can I take these colas?
-Yeah, sure.
What happened?
I mortgaged the bike.
Hey! Take the motorcycle inside.
We'll get it back when we have money.
But how will we reach now?
There's still a week left for Holi.
Even if we go crawling,
we'll make it well in time.
Come on. Take this.
Hey, look. Looks like a hotel.
Sir, can we get a room?
-Do you have your ID card?
-Yes.
And hers?
She doesn't have one.
-How old is she?
We have a kid.
She just looks like a teenager.
So you left your kid with her mom or what?
Let's go.
My followers have shot up like crazy!
Yaqub is famous!
But not more than Ammi!
Hey, the sun is out.
Wake up.
Wake up, it's morning!
Mom, I don't want to
go to school, please!
I'm not your mom.
Now get up!
You?
What are you doing here?
Mom!
Come on. Let's leave. Pick up your stuff.
But where are we going?
Well, there's a road,
it must lead somewhere.
Shit!
I have a headache.
I need to go to work.
Who got me here?
We didn't do anything, right?
Can I sleep here a bit longer, please?
Please call your driver.
We couldn't find him last night.
Shut the door on your way out.
To enter the house of love,
or to break into it
are two very different things.
The first is legitimized with a ceremony.
Your love has a stamp of approval.
Then it depends on the couple
if they want to spend their lives
looking into each other's eyes
or into the distance.
Now the second option, of breaking in
requires you to brush up on the law.
Since what you're trying to steal
isn't yours.
If it were, you wouldn't have to steal it.
Even if we assume you're a master thief.
Love is your weakness
and breaking in, is your compulsion.
If you're getting restless
and are unable to accept
the indifference of your beloved,
then be warned
Those who start with breaking locks
end up breaking entire walls.
And then that broken-down ruin
becomes your home
And even if you're okay with it,
take a glance
at your passport and check
If age were a ladder,
which step are you on?
Do you have the time
to scale these solid walls?
Because, my friends
love's a lot of work,
and it comes at a price.
Because love takes
a whole lot of maintenance!
-Hi!
-Hello!
-I'm Ayesha.
-Hi.
-Harmeet's girlfriend.
-Okay.
Her Highness' whims cannot be stopped
A million hearts have been robbed
They've all been denied
So many victimized
Fellas who tried to make an impression
Long queues everywhere, all around
Their demands of love give me tension
I'm a big city girl
Small towns won't cut it
Take me to Vegas or forget it
Lunch in Shanghai
And dinner in Dubai
I keep flying high chasing action
I go to LA for shopping
My nightlife is rocking
I go to LA for shopping
My nightlife is rocking
Go boy, go on, buzz off!
Maintenance, my maintenance
-My super grand hi-fi maintenance
-Rosy!
Maintenance, my maintenance
My super grand hi-fi maintenance
Take my gold, take all my money
Take a flight to the stars, my honey
Take a lifetime's worth of maintenance
Mr. Happy, get all this stuff
into the house.
I'll pay it in dollars, your maintenance!
Harmeet!
Harmeet!
Yes, sir.
How are you?
I'm fine.
And your friend, Ayesha?
She's fine, she's sleeping.
-She's still at your home?
-She had a headache.
Oh.
A headache, I see.
Yes.
Can I get you a drink?
When Chamba used to fall under Punjab,
people from the plains would build
summer homes up here.
And leave them open in the winter
for people here to take shelter in.
Chamba used to fall under Punjab?
-Well, even India fell under England once!
-Shut up!
Talking such nonsense all the time.
There's a big lock.
What are you doing?
Do you want a house
to stay in till Holi or not?
You turned out to be quite the crook!
I don't have Amrita Shergil's talent,
but I have her rebellious spirit!
Meaning?
Meaning Mr. Yaqub,
Raziya commands you to get in!
Are you hungry?
Extremely! I'm starving.
Noodles?
Yeah.
Hey "Shergill," come here.
I'll show you some magic.
Look here! A remote without a TV!
And look there!
A TV without a remote!
Why?
Why, oh why?
Because there's a lock in between!
Noodles.
Look, my followers have increased so much!
I'm sure no one else gets this many likes!
10,000,000!
-One crore?
-Yeah, it says 1K.
K-A-R-O-D, crore!
1K means one thousand, silly.
It might be a thousand to you,
but to me, it's one crore!
We were all sleeping at home.
When we woke up in the morning,
my son's motorcycle was missing.
Then we realized our daughter
wasn't home either.
Is this your wallet?
It's mine.
They dropped it here.
From here, they could only go
towards Chamba or Pathankot.
So, Mr. Abrar?
Brother Abrar, salaam!
Walaikum salaam.
How are you?
I'm fine.
-You tell me.
-Where's Yaqub?
Yaqub?
He's nowhere to be seen.
What did he do now?
Harmeet, what is it you want?
As in?
As in, what do you want in life?
-Music.
-Then you should focus only on music!
-I am, sir.
-Then why
Thank you.
Can you excuse us, please?
Then why this girl?
This
Ayesha.
I don't know.
She is Sapna's friend.
She's been fired.
-What?
-Sapna.
Why?
She asked for too much money.
That doesn't matter.
Harmeet
you're my star.
Not Sapna.
Do you ever think of
what you want, what you don't want?
It's been six months
since you're playing music here.
Look, you can pay your rent.
That's fantastic.
But do you have any ambitions?
Or do you want to stay at
an artist residency your whole life?
I want to play music in India.
For Desis.
-But I feel like
-What?
That they won't accept me.
Why?
People call me a fake Desi.
That's just here.
That won't happen there!
I'll take you to India.
But I can't go there now.
Why?
There's a family issue.
Once someone picks up my songs
and they become hits
Going to India will become easier.
What's the issue?
I just created a song
for a music composer.
But no one wants to give credit.
You'll get credit.
Sooner or later, you will.
What's the issue?
Harmeet.
You can talk to me about anything.
Anything.
You can share it with me.
You just concentrate on your music.
And come stay at my place.
My mother will be so happy. She'll make
lentils and rice for you every day.
And you won't even have to pay rent.
How can we tolerate this?
She's our only daughter. She's our life!
He's taken her away from us.
But did she go of her own accord?
Or has she been abducted?
What do you mean, of her own accord?
Do you think you know our daughter
better than us?
I'm her father, after all.
We never stopped her from doing anything.
She always takes our permission.
Amrita Suri is a student at a school
in Dalhousie, and is still a minor.
Is everything okay?
-Yakub Siddiqui, a local resident
-Yeah.
is a 21-year-old man
-Want to go back?
-and has abducted this girl.
-No.
-Has "Love Jihad" struck again?
-Or is it something else?
-We'll only go back after Holi now.
Text us on the number below.
With cameraman Inderjeet,
this is Apoorva Mahajan reporting.
What do we do for five days now?
No one drinks in our house.
It's considered a sin in ours.
But outside the house, my brother drinks
every day along with his friends.
My father also drinks occasionally,
and prays for repentance the next day.
-Well, even Ghalib used to drink!
-Who's that?
What kind of Muslim are you?
You don't know Ghalib!
So what, will you crucify me now?
"Let me drink in the mosque," says Ghalib
"Or tell me the place
where there is no God."
Oh! That's a WhatsApp forward!
Then what does it mean?
How does one open it?
This is why girls shouldn't drink.
How do people drink this stuff?
Forget how! Why do they drink it?
-Want more?
-No.
Your eyes tell me secrets uninhibited
Your love has given me glory unlimited
Since you came into my life
My status updates have everyone psyched
My Instagram gets millions of likes
Since you came into my life
World
My world!
You've become my whole world
A rainbow-colored dream world
It's all thanks to you
Yes, it's true
My world!
This world of eternal springs
Of infinite stars and galaxies
Is this real life or just a fantasy?
A fantasy
my whole world
A rainbow-colored dream world
It's all thanks to you
Yes, it's true
My world!
This world of eternal springs
Brother.
They mortgaged the bike
for five thousand rupees.
And left your name too.
Said you'll come and pick it up.
They're in Chamba.
Hey, Harmeet.
Hey, Zito.
Did you put the curtains?
Your girlfriend.
-My girlfriend?
-Your girlfriend.
What did you do to my room?
And where's my mom's quilt?
My hand's bleeding.
I was making a sandwich.
I can't make anything else.
I was hungry.
Haven't eaten anything all day.
You didn't like what I did?
Now take your stuff, and leave.
Need help?
I'm sorry.
I just thought, who lives like this?
Just wanted to make you feel like home.
Ready, madam?
-Just go!
-And all this stuff?
Give it to your wife.
What do you want?
You.
How do you know?
What?
How do you know you want me?
I I just know.
I've known for a while.
What do you want?
Why are you so mad at me?
I feel scared of you.
Why?
It's the way you look at me.
I'm sorry.
I'm just stupid.
I don't know what to do.
I don't know what this is!
I just know
I haven't felt this way before.
I've been with many boys,
but it's never been like this.
I don't know what kind
of connection this is
You tell me, what should I do?
How do I deal with this feeling,
or should I just ignore it?
I'll do whatever you say.
I just wanna be close to you.
Please.
These people are corrupting our sisters.
They should be sent back to their country.
Don't you think this is their country too?
How? You were given a place,
go stay there.
What are you doing here?
Your father's calling.
Hello.
Dad, salaam alaikum.
Dad, no
I just made a Ting Tong video,
See how much my followers have increased.
Dad, no.
We're just going
to attend a music concert.
We'll both come back after that.
Son, where are you?
Son?
He's lying.
These days you can trace a person's
location through their phone, right?
See where he is.
Come on, find out quickly.
-Hello.
-Hello, Mom. Amrita.
Where are you?
You've brought us such shame.
Your father, brother
Everyone's worried.
People are saying all kinds of things
Hello?
Hello?
If you shout, I'll hang up again.
Where are you?
Let me talk to Dad.
If you want to speak to him,
call on his phone.
He's not home.
Did she say anything?
Where is she?
Come on, there must be
something you found out?
Did you hear any sounds in the background?
Whether she was calling
from a highway with traffic,
or from near a river or canal,
or in the mountains?
Didn't you hear anything?
Don't you think your family's
making too big a deal of this?
Maybe it really has become
a very big deal.
As in?
I mean, my family's reputation
is getting tainted
because I ran away from home,
that too with a Muslim boy.
We're committing "Love Jihad"
and bringing "dishonor" to my family
Come on. Let's get a drink.
Open up your heart and say something
Your silences are killing me
Come closer a little
With a smile or a giggle
Don't hold back, let yourself go
Bit by bit
Step by step
You know what our problem is?
We approach love like a blind man
in a dark room
chasing after a black cat
that isn't even there.
Mr. Gulzar has said this about love,
"It's like a delicate, elusive scent
don't try to grab it with your hands
or taint it with labels."
But the jean-jacket, love-locket,
comb-in-the-back-pocket greasers
aren't gonna get it!
There once lived an old woman
She used to stitch and mend torn clothes.
One day, she was looking
for something outside her house.
People asked her,
"Lady, what are you looking for?"
She said, "I seem to have lost my needle."
"Where did you drop it?", they asked.
"Inside the house," said she.
People were surprised. They asked,
"If the needle has fallen inside,
why are you looking for it outside?"
The old woman faced the crowd and said,
"You rascals!
You're also just searching outside.
No one takes a look inside.
That's why you bring
your tattered selves for me to mend."
So coming back to Mr. Gulzar,
"Love is just a feeling,
feel it in your soul.
Don't label it, let love be love alone."
Finally! You do something
that normal people do.
You don't need to be so perfect, you know.
One beer won't kill you.
What language were you talking
in on that day, on Skype?
You heard?
German.
You know, I thought you were
from an Indian village.
The way you speak in Hindi
Sapna thinks you're a bumpkin.
That's how we speak Hindi
in our native place.
You should hear my dad speak.
Your ears will bleed.
What does your dad do?
You don't want to know.
Why?
He works
He just works all the time.
He bangs his secretary, he bangs CFOs.
He bangs supermodels,
he bangs actresses, wannabe actresses!
My mother bangs her gym trainer.
And my mother used to be his gym trainer
While he was married to his first wife.
And we're just the
Great English Banging Family!
So, cheers to that!
Wake up.
It's morning.
Will you have tea?
Shall I make some?
In a while.
Son, are you up?
Want breakfast?
Aunty, I can barely boil water!
My father makes amazing mince parathas.
He adds ginger, green chilies,
and egg to it. It's delicious!
I bet you've never had parathas like that.
Oh, you don't eat meat.
Oh, she's here.
Sweetheart, will you have breakfast?
The noodles we had that day were expired!
Come, sit.
Sorry, we mistook this to be our house.
Brush your teeth, child.
Have some piping hot aloo parathas.
I told them all about DJ Mohabbat!
Have some parathas.
Don't you think we should leave?
Where will we go?
There are still four days until Holi,
and besides, what are our options?
Why did we have to run away
so much in advance?
I wasn't thinking then.
What if they call my father?
They are very cute.
You know, they have a son in Germany.
A grandson too.
Aunty says he looks just like me.
Do you have anything
other than lentils and rice?
Yeah, doner kebab.
I love Turkish food.
Doner kebab is German.
In fact, it was first made in Berlin.
Before that,
in Germany, you'd only get sausages,
curried sausages, and sauerkraut.
Nothing other than cabbage grew there.
When I was a kid there, my father went
home to Punjab only once in two years.
And I loved
to eat there whenever I visited.
Lentils and rice, roti, sabzi,
flatbread with chickpeas.
Then he came out
and his family disowned him.
Now if he goes back
to Punjab his own family might kill him.
When did he come out?
I was eight then.
Must've been so hard for your mom.
How did she--
He's a very cool dad.
-And your mom?
-She's cool too.
Do they still talk?
They love each other.
Very hot, yeah.
Hello, my love, you seem happy!
Yeah, Mom.
Have you met someone?
Son, he looks just like you.
Must be as old as you.
We had big paddy fields
and the kids were fond of studies.
We sent Harminder
to Germany, to study engineering.
He was fond of building cars.
Then God knows what happened to him.
Son, he married a Nazi!
She poisoned his mind so badly
He never returned.
He left his home.
Even his child!
And went and married a man!
Ever heard of such a thing?
How can a man marry a man?
And his wife
was very clever.
She spoke Punjabi. She learned it.
She even spoke Hindi.
But she was a Nazi, after all.
It made no difference to her
that our son was marrying another man.
All she cares about is money.
We were humiliated. The kids fell out.
They fought amongst themselves.
The land and property all got divided.
Then what would we oldies do there?
So we came here.
Our grandkids visit sometimes.
But
Harmeet never comes.
He never came.
Child.
When I saw you sleeping in bed
I was reminded of him.
Look, his nose is exactly like yours.
All we wish for now
is to meet Harmeet once.
What What do you think two men
do with each other?
Love.
My father must be really worried.
I don't care what he thinks.
He doesn't know the truth
But he must be missing me.
He loves me, after all.
Should we go back?
Just because I'm thinking out loud,
doesn't mean I want to go back.
Sorry.
Look at them.
They're upset because their son
didn't turn out the way they wanted.
But at least he's happy.
Wherever he is,
even if he's married a guy.
What matters is that he's happy.
I also wonder what
two men do with each other.
Who cares?
Whether they hang upside-down
like bats or eat lying down.
-Yes.
-At least they're happy.
What are you trying to say?
I don't know anymore.
I just feel like crying.
Lend me your shoulder.
I'm not asking you to lift a corpse.
Your shoulder.
Why is this world like this?
Why?
Why can't people just be happy?
And why are people offended
and insulted so easily?
What's this big deal about "honor"?
And why is honor destroyed
only when people fall in love?
Love ain't a knife
that can rip apart
a family's honor, is it?
Why are people so ashamed
when their children fall in love
with someone?
Tell me, TingTongians
If we cannot make our own decisions
and every choice we make requires
a familial stamp of approval
then how are we humans anymore?
We're computer-programmed robots!
Tell me TingTongians,
am I wrong about this?
I'm really sad today.
In a world
where people are dying of hunger,
folks don't have money to survive.
Where Antarctica is turning
hot like Delhi
and it's snowing in Baghdad.
Where there's no guarantee
that the Earth will survive or not.
There the people's biggest problems
are love and music.
Love and music!
And that goddamn DJ Mohabbat's music.
That DJ Mohabbat ruined my life.
I set out to hear his songs,
and what a shitstorm it caused!
Ammi's veil came off.
Now do what you want to.
-Are you Harmeet Singh?
-Yes.
Turn around, please.
Put your hands behind your back.
Come on, let's go.
Where's Harmeet?
Why are the cops here?
When I was ten, they gave me
Amrita Pritam's books to read.
They made me like this.
If they gave her books to you,
then what did she read?
Idiot!
Amrita Pritam was a writer.
Like you're a clown!
But then I don't know what happened.
Suddenly, everything changed.
They took my phone away.
The books were all gone,
and everyone turned vegetarian.
And I, who was vegetarian
since I was a child,
was told that I'd gotten out of hand.
People don't get wiser with age.
In fact, they become stupider.
I don't understand anything you say.
But I know that
whatever you say is always awesome.
No matter what I say, I do miss my dad.
Then call him from the market.
Even if they see the number, so what?
ABDUCTION.
FORMER MLA BALDEV SURI'S
MINOR DAUGHTER, AMRITA SURI IS MISSING.
THIS IS A CASE OF LOVE JIHAD.
What happened?
They've put up our posters everywhere.
-What do you mean?
-Look around.
Come on, Amrita! Let's go!
Booked for raping a minor,
daughter of a Pakistani billionaire.
You're famous.
You're on every front page.
I just feel very scared.
-That man won't die, right?
-He'll be fine. Come on.
Please come back, my child! Please.
BOY ON THE RUN AFTER ABDUCTING A GIRL.
THE CONSPIRACY BEHIND LOVE AND MUHAMMAD.
Please come back, sweetheart!
Watch this helpless father,
crying tears of blood.
Yet another victim of "Love Jihad."
Look at him begging
for his daughter's safe return.
Look at him and tell me,
is our religion not under threat?!
The clothes have dried,
and I've picked them up.
Aunty
Son, you shouldn't have lied to us.
-Aunty, I didn't lie to you.
-Shut up! Get outside.
I know everything.
It's been on the TV since morning.
It's on my WhatsApp as well.
Aunty, he didn't lie about anything.
What did you say?
My child
My child, this is that Nazi poison
that you're unaware of.
The poison that took
my son away from me.
What nonsense is this?
You were okay a minute ago,
and now you've turned into a zombie.
We are leaving.
Now you can sit at home
and stare at TV news and WhatsApp.
Let's go!
Think about it carefully, my child.
Otherwise, your family too
will be humiliated like us.
He's a Muslim.
He's allowed four marriages!
-Four marriages
-Let's go!
Come on!
We will kill you!
Hey, motherfucker, you'll die.
You'll die so soon!
-You gonna die!
-You gonna die!
-No please, no!
-Welcome to our club.
Turn around so that
I can see your ass, sweetie!
You lie still like that. Youre gonna die.
I am gonna torture you!
I don't know why she filed a case
Mom, please tell Dad.
I didn't do anything!
I just met her at the club.
I don't even know who she is,
or whose daughter she is.
Mom!
Dad, please get me out of here!
Isn't this all becoming a bit much?
Maybe I should just go
to the police station instead?
My family will calm down
and we won't have to keep running anymore.
What about Mohabbat?
I'll go another time!
I'm sure there will be more concerts.
So you'll go back on your words?
What do you mean?
You made grand declarations
on Ting Tong, ran from home
and now you'll give up on everything?
Ammi said those things.
I don't think Ammi will be
back on Ting Tong again.
What are you saying?
This isn't you!
Man, I'm exhausted.
What are we doing?
We're just waiting for Holi to arrive.
We have no plan,
no money, and no purpose.
You said people get stupider
as they get older.
But you've lost it overnight!
I can't see my father crying like this!
He's shedding crocodile tears!
Is there no one in your life
who you really love?
Is there?
No matter how my father is
Right, he's still your father!
He really loves you!
He only loves his reputation!
His family's reputation.
There's this "Ammi" on Ting Tong.
Do you follow her?
She posted a video today. Will you see it?
You won't understand. Let it be!
You'll go back, but what about me?
So come with me!
I may not be as smart as you,
or educated
But I know something
that you'll never understand.
What, man?!
That my name is
Yaqub!
Nothing's going to happen to you.
My father will listen to me.
You carry on.
We can't just land up there suddenly.
I'll see you later.
Trust me.
Goodbye.
There's nothing to fear.
Hey.
Smoke?
Take it.
You need to toughen yourself up a bit.
You're gonna carry on catching a good
hiding in here if you carry on like this.
You want some coffee?
Drink some coffee.
You're gonna have
to face them all again in the morning.
Dad, sorry!
I just went to see a concert.
But when I saw you crying, I came back.
Dad, sorry.
Sorry.
A plate of noodles, please.
Salaam to all you TingTongians from Yaqub!
My father says, love as you please
and whoever you please.
But to express that love or grasp it,
isn't in everyone's destiny.
I couldn't unite my love with hers.
I never stood a chance.
I was too far back in the queue.
-Madam?
-Yes?
-Is there a bus leaving for Chandigarh?
-Yes.
-What time?
-In 30 minutes to an hour.
Look behind the buses.
Check inside and around the buses.
What are you waiting for? Go!
Check the stands!
I want him caught in five minutes!
Hey! Stop, stop!
Stop!
Catch him! Now!
Stop!
Since you came into my life
World
My world!
You've become my whole world
A rainbow-colored dream world
It's all thanks to you
Yes, it's true
My world!
This world of eternal springs
Of infinite stars and galaxies
Got me wrecked
This love got me wrecked
It had me deceived
This love's a disease
Got me wrecked
This love got me wrecked
It had me deceived
THREE YEARS LATER
This love's a disease
This love's a scorpion
It dug its claws in me
Had me ensnared
Stung me without mercy
Thumped its chest, then ran away
This nasty, nasty bug
Slyly bit and slinked away
It hid under the rug
My pain has seen this mourning come
What to do?
No prayer can make it come undone
What to do?
I cut them off, I broke away
From all my bonds and ties
I broke away
Left behind this rotten world
Of false dreams and lies
I broke away
Got me wrecked
This love got me wrecked
It had me deceived
This love's a disease
You want it? You gotta earn it!
There is no sleep
The pain goes deep
There is no sleep
Tears have run dry
Smiles have gone awry
Step back.
Tears have run dry
Lightning has struck
My world is stuck
I'm unafraid of fear itself
It trails me like a shadow
What to do?
I'm drenched in darkness
This stain will never go
What to do?
I cut them off, I broke away
From all my bonds and ties
I broke away
Left behind this rotten world
Of false dreams and lies
Some good news.
That girl.
She's an adult now.
She's actually put out a statement
to say that you were innocent.
She was drunk, and you
-The pain goes deep
-It had me deceived
Love got me messed
Tears have run dry
Got me wrecked
Dad, you carry on.
I'll come back in a few days.
Why do you want to stay here?
Not here.
I want to go somewhere. Alone.
Harmeet!
Harmeet!
Harmeet!
Harmeet?
Harmeet!
Sorry.
-I've come to explain!
-Get out!
-Please let me explain!
-I don't need it.
Just once, please!
Just hear me once. Please, let me talk!
Harmeet, my dad called the cops.
I didn't know anything.
My driver told them where I was.
And he just assumed things.
Harmeet, I never lied to you.
Nothing I said or did was a lie.
You were underage!
You lied the moment you entered the club
with your fake ID card.
Do not screw with my head!
I've come to apologize.
I did whatever I could!
Hired my own lawyer.
Withdrew the case and told the truth.
I did it.
They even forced me to sign the documents.
I couldn't do anything about it.
Do you have any idea what
I've gone through in the last three years?
I just wanted to play my music.
And now, I can't even hear it.
You snatched my whole life away from me!
I didn't mean to!
You didn't mean to?
Then what did you mean,
you privileged brat?!
I wasn't your toy!
No matter who did it,
the damage is done now!
Now get lost from here,
before I kill and bury you.
If you think it'll make you feel better,
then just do it!
-Just leave!
-I won't!
Just leave!
Not until I make this right, I won't go!
You wanna make things right?
Cool, come. Let's make them right!
Now it feels right. Get out!
Just like my father!
Who do you think you are?
I'm saying sorry, am I not?
-You think I can't hit you back?
-Come, hit me.
Please, I'm saying sorry.
I can't hear it.
Should I just kill myself?
Will that satisfy you?
-I think that would be a blessing!
-Please.
-You should do that!
-No, please!
Take your expensive car
and go bang it up somewhere!
So hard that your fancy airbags
worth millions can't save you.
You'll do your father
and me a really big favor.
Such is my situation
I follow you in every direction
It's too goddamn intense
Our crazy star-crossed connection
You started by laying conditions
I saw you and gave into emotion
It's so damn sick
Our crazy star-crossed connection
Connection
Listen to me now
You gotta hear me out
The heart wants a solution
This heart demands a solution
To our crazy star-crossed connection
Connection
It started as a crush
Then we fell in love
Like a sign from above
Show me your Kardashian style
And all that cool stuff
How long do I clear the debris
Of the tsunami you unleashed
My road to love grew toxic
Chasing your elusive blue tick
I altered the whole constitution
To attain you
I got rid of two sections
It is a lot more than I bargained for
Our crazy star-crossed connection
Connection
I was in my car,
I saw her coming very fast and
She got very badly injured.
I came to help
What were you doing
when the accident took place?
-I was sleeping in my car.
-Sleeping in your car?
She was going really fast
and she got really badly
Did you get any injuries?
Oh my, so much love!
Well, your "love" reminds me of a story.
Want to hear it?
-Yes!
-Yes, please!
Once upon a time,
a Lover stood on Love's door.
-Who was at Love's door?
-A Lover!
A Lover!
He stood knocking on the door,
ringing the bell.
A voice rang out,
"Who is it?"
The Lover said, "It's me."
But Love didn't answer.
The Lover stood, persistent.
The door didn't open,
no voice beckoned
Bereft of hope,
he walked out of the alley of Love.
And reached the bazaar.
It was chock-a-block with lovers
till his eyes could see.
And each of them was drunk in love.
But love eluded them.
The bazaar offers all forms of relief.
Balms, and medicine for all grief.
Distraction to your heart's desire!
But the Lover was seeking something else.
He was a true lover.
So he treads up that door again
knocking gently.
And a voice said,
-Who is it?
-Who is it?
Who is it?
-This time he said, "It is you."
-It is you!
"Just you."
Because friends
love starts with "you".
What am I?
Because "I" is the dead-end of every road,
where everything comes to a halt.
So it is only love when
It is you!
You can't control it with religion
Nor at gunpoint will it transition
Love shall bring the revolution
Love shall bring the revolution
As long as the heart beats out loud
Freedom's flame won't be put out
Love shall bring the revolution
Love shall bring the revolution