American Trash (2024) Movie Script
(soft dramatic music)
Is it that you recall
Being in harmony
Is there someone in you
(dramatic music continues)
Melissa?
(dramatic music)
Well, when company comes,
you always stick the dirt in the back.
If you're outside and you
live a life on the outside,
outside world programs people
into education and knowledge.
The mind that you live in,
the thought that you live in,
the inside unprogrammed people
to wisdom and understanding.
His eyes reach in the conscious
mind, in the foreground.
He's lost sight of his children.
He doesn't see in the back.
He doesn't see in the shadows.
He doesn't see on the roadside.
He doesn't see in the back of the cells.
He doesn't see in the
yard, in the penitentiary.
(people grunting)
He doesn't see the bottom,
the bottom of the world.
People in here are just your reflection.
They're your mistakes.
They weren't born rebelling.
They weren't born with anger
and frustration that they have.
That had to be put on them by somebody.
Somebody created them.
Aren't we all born to die?
(dramatic music)
(birds chirping)
(wind rustling)
[Charlie] It is like
a guy come up to me once
and he was freaking out
on acid and he said,
"Oh, man, I'm going crazy.
He said, everything is all fucked up, man.
The world is all miserable."
And I said, "No, it ain't, brother."
"Man," I said, "Everything's all right.
Everything's in harmony, man."
I said, "Everything's perfect."
I said, "Can't you see perfection?"
Look at it in yourself.
He said it is, I said yeah.
I said, "It's a nice day, man.
Look, the sun's out and
everybody's having a good day."
I said, "It's a wonderful day."
I said, "Can't you appreciate that?"
And he said, "Sure."
I said, "Well, then relax your mind, man.
Get all that negative vibration out of you
and go on down the road
and have a good day, man."
So he came back two or three
hours later and he said,
"I killed somebody."
I know who that is.
Do you?
Yeah.
And that's the Berkeley interview,
February 25th, 1985.
Wow, you do know.
It's kind of bizarre that you
know that, don't you think?
Yeah, but I'm not the one
carrying the tape recorder.
But for what it's worth, I
think that was probably the most
truthful interview he's ever given.
It was brilliant.
And no media bullshit.
So you just come here and pick up trash?
Well, the ranch is gone.
They burnt it down years ago.
This cave is all that's left.
Most people see it as some
evil relic from the past,
but to me, it's sacred.
So I look after it.
(soft dramatic music)
I think he'd really appreciate
what you're doing here.
(dramatic music continues)
I know I do.
- I'm Milles.
- Melissa.
That's a nice bracelet
that you have there.
(soft dramatic music)
Let me help you.
I don't wanna break it.
You're welcome.
There you go.
Thank you.
You're so sweet.
It's like a little cell phone thing.
Oh, my God, let's kill it.
Kill it.
Kill all the cell phones.
(soft dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
(helicopter whirring)
(dramatic music)
[Charlie] And then
when I got out of prison,
I went out in the mountains
and I looked around
and I sat down and I seen
the water all polluted.
I've seen the trees being cut down.
I've seen this concrete
maze that man has made,
and it's like I had
come from another place
that's not the same as the place
that you guys or that world lives in.
And I thought, "Well,
who's responsible for this?"
Whose job is this to make sure
that we got air here to breathe,
because I'm gonna run
out of air here, man,
"or this whole planet's
gonna run out of air."
And I say, "Man, the life
they're killing is mine."
And then I go out and they're cutting
the big old tree down.
And I say, "Oh, I feel that.
I feel what are you're doing."
You're cutting me down here.
So I tell them, "Don't cut
me down or I'll shoot you.
If you keep cutting the trees
down, I'm gonna cut you down."
And he said, "Well, look,
I got a wife and kids
and I need the money.
I have two jobs and I
don't know anything else."
And I said, "Well, I can't blame you.
Who's your boss?"
Seriously, the Charlie
Manson that you've created,
that's not me.
That's only an illusion in your minds.
"It hasn't got anything to do with me."
(soft gentle music)
(engine revving in background)
(soft music continues)
What are you thinking about?
Sometimes, I stare at the ocean.
I can feel how vast it is.
Like it's enveloping me.
Mm.
And I forget where I am.
Where do you think you are?
I try not to think
about that one, Melissa.
I do.
I can't help it.
I've always felt this way until recently.
What way?
This weight, pressing
down on me my entire life,
pushing me closer to the ground,
having to constantly fight to stand up
and look at a world that can
be so beautiful one minute,
terrifying the next.
Everything we've been taught
about our existence is a lie.
But the day I looked in
the mirror and I realized
what was staring back at
me was just an illusion,
I felt this freedom connected me to life
beyond this physical body,
and that I could exist in
other worlds without limits.
I want so much for you
to know that freedom too.
Knowing you is that freedom.
(dramatic music)
(birds chirping)
(dramatic music continues)
Hey guys, how's it going? (Chuckles)
It's said you're a young girl
And you don't know right from wrong
It's said by people
Who cannot sing your song
You let them watch the magic
But remain within yourself strong
(faint music playing in background)
Oh shit.
(faint music playing in background)
Hey, babe.
Hey, babe.
What time is it?
It's 10:00.
Oh, shit, okay.
Yeah.
Oh, look at you.
Oh, shit.
You see anything you like?
- Yes.
- Yeah.
Oh, I do see something I like.
- Always.
- You gonna see
Tai again today?
Um, yeah.
I'm really glad you're
comfortable with him.
Me too.
Don't tell him I said those.
(Melissa chuckles)
I got a man crush.
I feel like we'd be
kind of become friends.
I knew you'd like him.
Yeah, you're right.
Yeah.
You know, some of these
physical therapists, I feel like
they lose interest in their
clients after a while.
You know, it's like they
don't take the time,
just the money.
There's so many people like that.
I don't get why they choose
jobs that help people
when they don't really give a fuck
about the people they're treating.
It's just sad.
Yeah.
Greed, greed.
- Yeah.
It's really sad that
money is the only thing
that motivates them.
You know what's cool though?
- What?
- Tai likes to hike.
[Melissa] I know, see? (Chuckles)
And there's a couple of
trails up in Topanga Canyon.
- Oh.
- Oh, yeah.
[Melissa] Baby, that's great.
We're gonna plan a hike soon.
- Yes.
- Yes.
- I'm so happy, babe.
- Me too.
Well, my love, I better
take off before I'm late.
Okay.
Hey, remember that
restaurant in Hollywood?
I think it was The Key.
- Yes.
- Right?
Yeah, I knew that'd get your attention.
Let me take you there tonight.
- Okay.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
- Cool.
Let's do that.
I'll meet you here after work.
We can grab an Uber.
Well, you know what?
I'll just take the bus.
I'll meet you there like around seven.
- Okay.
- Is that cool?
All right, well, I'll
see you then, babe.
Give me a kiss.
Be safe, okay?
- I will.
- I love you.
- Love you too.
Your appointment's at 11:00.
(Milles chuckles)
(sighs) Thank you God for Melissa.
(soft dramatic music)
(loud thudding)
- Fucking shit!
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
(dramatic music continues)
Fuck you, man, just fucking do this.
Fucking face.
Fucking cunt.
Fucking God.
(suspenseful music)
(car engine starting)
(suspenseful music continues)
Fuck, fuck.
(suspenseful music)
(suspenseful music continues)
(suspenseful music continues)
How are you?
You know what?
I actually woke up
feeling well rested today.
Well, that's good.
Let's get you comfortable.
So you're sleeping better?
Oh.
Woo.
Yeah, I think so.
I feel like Melissa's influence
has something to do with it.
I wake up to this whisper
that is her voice,
and there she is, just sitting next to me.
I don't know.
It's called love, brother.
And I'm pretty sure
she feels the same way.
Don't tell her I said that.
Deal.
(suspenseful music)
Tell me about the nightmare
since our last session.
Occasionally.
But it's not like it used to be.
I can pull myself out now.
It's like being awake in a dream,
knowing you're dreaming.
So it's not as scary.
Before, it used to feel so real, you know?
Like I was dying or in hell
and all these dead people.
I'm sorry, man.
I know that's some heavy shit.
- No.
I'm here to help you, I'm
not here to judge you.
Thanks, Tai, I appreciate that.
Can I get you to lay down?
Let's put this under here.
Oh.
Do that, yeah.
So when I apply gentle pressure right here
to the base of your skull, what I'm doing
is I'm releasing cerebral spinal fluid.
Sometimes, it gets blocked due to like
physical or emotional trauma.
Okay.
In other words, I'm
treating you for PTSD.
Oh, okay, I know what that is.
(suspenseful music)
Take it.
Just take it.
(Melissa screaming)
(Melissa sobbing)
Save me, someone!
Tai, you okay?
(Melissa screaming)
Did you say you saw
Melissa this morning?
Yeah.
I was with her man.
I'm staying with her now.
(man grunting)
Where's she at?
She's at work.
(soft dramatic music)
(phone ringing)
[Jared] Hello, Cabin Creek Crystal.
Yeah, hi, is this Jared?
- Speaking.
- Yeah, hi, Jared.
This is Milles, Melissa's boyfriend.
Can you please put her on the phone?
I really need to talk
to her, it's important.
[Jared] Oh, man, hey.
I am so glad you called.
She was supposed to open this morning,
and I got a call that no one showed up.
Is everything okay?
Do you know where she is?
No, I don't know where she
is. I'll call her cell, thanks.
(phone ringing)
[Melissa] Hey, it's Melissa.
Leave a message, please.
Yeah, hi baby, it's me.
Can you please call me?
I just called your job and
they said you're not there.
I'm worried.
Call me as soon as you
get this message, okay?
I love you.
Bye.
Hey, I'm Milles, Melissa's boyfriend.
Are you Jared?
- Yeah, Milles.
I called you earlier, you remember?
Melissa didn't come in this morning.
Something wrong?
Is she missing?
- Yeah.
Yeah, we think so.
Everything okay, dad?
Everything's fine, sweetheart.
This is Milles, Melissa's boyfriend.
Hi Milles, I'm Mary.
Hey, Mary.
We've been worried too.
It's not like her to be late
or not show up for no reason.
She always calls if there's a problem.
Sorry, we couldn't be more help.
Wait a minute, have you tried calling
Melissa's sister, Mandy?
I've never even met Mandy.
I don't think Melissa and
Mandy speak too often.
I'll tell you what, if you don't mind,
leave me your phone number,
and I'll try to reach her.
- Sure.
Thanks, Jared.
I'm sorry about this one.
It's okay, man.
No problem, no worries.
If you hear from her, let me know.
- I will.
- Okay.
Listen, I'm gonna head
back to the apartment.
Maybe she should have got sick
or something and went home.
Okay, alright.
Hey, you need a ride?
- No, I'm gonna walk.
It's not that far, the traffic's
just gonna slow me down.
Okay, well, what about your bike?
I chained my bike to your fence, man.
If they steal, they steal.
I don't care, I just gotta go, okay?
- Milles.
- I'll be okay.
(suspenseful music)
(children laughing)
Melissa.
(dramatic music)
Melissa.
(soft dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
(suspenseful music)
(suspenseful music continues)
(Milles gasps)
(dramatic music)
Your dress book.
Okay.
(suspenseful music)
Come on, pick up, man.
Pick up, Jared, pick up.
Somebody pick up their phone, please.
Jared, this is-
Jared, can you hear me?
I don't need a text message.
I need a human being to talk to me.
Where's my fucking girlfriend?
I can't do it.
I can't fuck this in.
I can't do it, man.
No, no, no, no, no, listen to me.
(stuttering) I'm her boyfriend.
(Milles screaming)
It's combat, bro.
It's combat, it's combat.
It's combat.
[Mandy] Hi, Milles.
This is Mandy, I'm Melissa's sister.
Jared gave me your number, but
you and I, we've never met.
But I know who you are.
Melissa's told me about you.
I'm gonna text you an address.
Can you please just meet me there?
Like just like as soon as you can.
Okay?
(suspenseful music)
I am sorry, this is really hard.
I know.
I do know.
I understand.
I'm right here.
(dramatic music)
(Mandy gasps and sobs)
No!
That's her. (Sobbing)
It's okay, it's okay.
It's okay, it's okay.
Okay?
You're okay, you're okay, okay?
I'm Detective Kelly.
I really need this.
What is your relationship to the deceased?
She's my sister.
And you are Mandy Maddox, correct?
Yes.
Thank you.
Thanks.
Here are your sister's possessions.
They were discovered on
the body at the site.
(Mandy sobbing)
Can someone please just tell me
what happened to my sister?
We have a statement from a woman
who discovered your sister,
but it was after the fact.
And we don't have any witnesses yet
to help us determine the cause,
although there's an ongoing
investigation in the area
to see if anyone saw your sister prior.
Prior to what?
What did they do to her?
She was abducted.
We have an anonymous witness
who's come forward and
said they saw a young woman
fitting the description of your sister
being carried into a van.
Where?
On the corner of Speedway
and South Venice Boulevard.
That's it?
For now.
We have to perform an
official autopsy to be certain,
but from what I've observed
in my initial examination
is that your sister
experienced severe head trauma,
more than likely from a blunt object.
And there's some indication
at the base of her neck.
Miss Maddox, I'm sorry, but
I also should inform you
that there was some signs of rape.
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
(soft dramatic music)
I'm gonna need a name if
you're here for the service.
Milles Carpis.
(soft dramatic music)
Are you Alvin and Kathleen Maddox?
[Alvin] Yes.
I recognize you from pictures
that Melissa showed me.
I'm Milles Carpis.
I just wanted to tell you
about how much I love your daughter,
and that she changed my life
in the short time that I was with her.
She was my world,
my angel here on earth.
And I don't understand why
something like this could happen
to someone with such an innocent soul.
Are you saying you dated our daughter?
No, I was her boyfriend
and was living with her.
Really?
Because she never mentioned anything about
being intimate with a man twice her age.
There's a lot of things
she didn't tell you,
and I'm not sure why.
I just wanted to finally meet you both
and maybe share a moment
for Melissa's sake.
But it isn't necessary.
What do you plan to do now?
I'm gonna have a
conversation with the police
and find out what's going
on with their investigation.
I mean, with the apartment.
You say you live there with Melissa.
Is your name on the lease?
No.
Well, you should know
we'll be collecting
all of her possessions from
the apartment this week.
Do you plan on staying at the apartment?
I don't know.
Okay, maybe you should
get your things and leave.
Do you understand?
Yeah, he understands.
He'll get his stuff this week.
You okay with that?
Sure, no problem.
Listen, I wanna tell you both something.
You may not know me or even
like me, and that's okay.
Well, Melissa talked a
lot about the both of you
and how alone and ignored
she felt living with you.
That's why she left.
Don't blame me for that.
Hey, where you going?
I just need to walk, okay?
Okay, hey, I'll find you later.
I'll call you.
- Okay, yeah.
- I'll handle this.
- Okay.
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
Thanks, Charles.
I know you knew her.
We're all connected, every one of us.
Then why doesn't anybody care?
All is not lost, Milles.
Hang in there.
You know where to find
me if you need to talk.
(dramatic music)
[Mandy] Hi Milles, it's Mandy.
Will you please call me?
I'm so sorry about the funeral.
I just found out what
happened with my parents.
I didn't even know that you were outside.
I was in the church.
I would've never let
them talk to you that way
had I been there.
I know how much you loved my sister.
Will you please call me
just to let me know that you're okay?
I'm gonna text you an address.
It's a restaurant in Venice.
Me, Jared, Abby, and his daughter Mary
are gonna meet up there
tonight around seven.
I spoke to your friend Tai after you left
and he said he'd call you.
Please come meet us there.
I promise my parents won't be there.
But either way, please just let
me know you're okay, please?
Okay, bye.
(dramatic music)
So this is apparently what happened.
So Milles goes to the funeral, obviously,
and my parents wouldn't let him in.
They kicked him out.
- That's wrong.
I know.
Does he realize that he's a combat guy?
He was in Desert Storm just like we were.
- No way.
- Yes.
- Wow.
- You know,
I didn't even know that.
That just makes me feel fucking worse.
Are you kidding me?
I mean, that's ridiculous
that they wouldn't let him in.
(phone ringing)
You have a reservation?
(ringing continues)
You don't remember me?
I used to come here all the
time with my girlfriend Melissa.
We get a lot of people
in here every day.
I don't remember every face.
I remember you.
Your name's Vincent.
I remember how nice you were to us.
Melissa really loved this place.
Look, I can't help you
if you don't have a reservation, buddy.
I mean, you're not even properly dressed.
I'm not your fucking buddy.
You're not even human.
You're a fucking zombie,
going through life on autopilot
like all the other
zombies with your phone.
Tap, tap, tap, tap.
Sir, you need to calm down.
I'm gonna call the cops.
I'm calm, call 'em.
Maybe they can tell me
who killed my girlfriend
and why they dumped her
body in a fucking trash bin.
Look, I'm sorry.
We've just come from a funeral.
He's obviously very upset.
It was his girlfriend.
(phone ringing)
It's okay.
Go ahead.
I'm sorry for your loss.
Drinks are on me.
I'm sorry about that.
No, don't.
It's okay, we all understand.
We already ordered some dishes to share.
We can order you something
else if you don't like it.
That's fine, Abby, I'm not picky.
Well, at least we're
gonna get free drinks.
- I know.
- Like you need more now.
This is our favorite restaurant.
I think, right?
- Yeah.
Well, yeah, she has much
better taste than you.
I'm sorry-
(conversation drowns)
(suspenseful music)
(people laughing)
I'm sorry.
- Well.
- All together, yes.
[Abby] We need to like exchange,
we need to like make this a thing.
Yeah, a thing.
Melissa's magnificent.
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
What's wrong, babe?
Nothing.
No, don't do that.
- Do what?
- Pretend.
It's not who you are and
it's not what I want.
Talk to me.
I don't wanna ruin it.
Ruin what?
This moment.
I know why you brought me here.
It's beautiful.
And I don't wanna taint the memory of it.
Hey, you love me?
Everything I am, yeah.
And I love you.
Now, be honest.
What's bothering you?
You know, Melissa,
most people think of hell
as some fucking dungeon under the earth
with fire and demons and shit.
And God sends you there.
From what I've seen, God
has nothing to do with it.
Hell is a place where there is nothing
but the worst things
that man is capable of.
I was not ashamed of the
hatred that I had to bear.
I shared it with them.
They just didn't know.
In their point of view, I was
just some savage crusader,
a devil sent by a country
of devils to kill.
And that's what I did.
Followed the mission.
Find weapons of mass destruction.
(loud explosion)
We had weapons.
We used them.
Bodies dropped, people died.
Grave sites, mass grave
sites with women and children
were stacked on top of
each other, birth to death.
And destruction.
We left the wake of that
with each step that we took over there.
We found what we were looking for.
We found ourselves.
(dramatic music)
Hello?
[Mandy] Hey, Milles.
Oh, hey, Mandy.
How are you?
[Mandy] I am actually
feeling better today.
I'm glad.
What's going on, what are you up to?
[Mandy] Well, I was supposed to show
a property this morning,
but my client bailed on me.
So I'm actually in Venice.
Isn't that your neck of the woods?
Yeah, I'm staying with Tai.
He lives in Venice.
[Mandy] Oh, well, if you'd
like, I could swing by.
Maybe some fresh air
would be good for you.
Well, yeah, no, I'd like that.
[Mandy] Cool, just text me your address.
Okay, I will.
Okay, bye.
[Mandy] See ya.
(dramatic music)
Are you okay?
It's okay.
Come on.
(birds chirping)
(soft dramatic music)
[Charles] Paper and all that.
All this paper comes from trees.
Shame to waste all the
trees right in this trash
for your children to be raised up in.
Do you want your children to live
according to the gospel of Helter Skelter?
Who is that speaking?
[Charles] I've seen this
concrete maze that man has made,
and it's like I had
come from another place.
Charles Manson.
Do you mind turning it off?
Sure.
(dramatic music)
It was your sister's.
The tape or the recorder?
Both.
She used to play it for me all the time.
We'd listen to it together.
He talked a lot about
people's lack of concern
and their ignorance
toward the environment.
Well, what do you think of this place?
I think it's beautiful.
Appreciate you taking me here.
I wanna show you something.
Hey, old friend.
(dramatic music)
I want you to do something for me.
Close your eyes.
Trust me.
Do you feel that?
I feel my hand against the tree.
Okay.
We're gonna take a deep breath.
Breathe in slow,
and let it out.
How does that make you feel?
It makes me feel calm.
You can open your eyes.
(dramatic music)
Look at me.
(dramatic music continues)
It doesn't have to be about darkness.
I know that you loved my sister,
and I know that you're hurting,
but you are not alone.
And the light?
It's all around us.
Can you at least try?
Yeah.
I'll try.
- Hey.
- Hi.
Oh.
How are you holding up?
Takes time.
I'm glad you both could make it.
Linda said she called you.
Yeah, yeah, she did.
I wanted to see you guys.
It's been too long.
The funeral made me realize that.
Jared, I'm sure you know Milles.
Of course.
Good to see you again, brother.
You know, I know you and
I haven't spoke much.
Melissa always spoke
extremely highly of you.
I actually used to work here
before I got my broker's license.
So I introduced Melissa to Jared
when she told me she needed a job.
Oh, okay.
Finally.
Oh, my God.
I'm so glad you're here.
I was really worried
about you, my sunshine.
You okay?
- Okay, honey.
Hey, so I wanna introduce you to Milles.
He was Melissa's boyfriend.
I'm Linda.
Nice to meet you.
I'm Milles, pleasure to meet you.
- Have a seat, guys.
- Nice to meet you.
I fucking miss you so much, seriously.
I miss you more.
Do you see that garbage on
social media the other day?
Some asshole was filming a rape.
What the fuck is wrong with people?
And all the social media posturing?
That's not life, okay?
The fake sentiment.
And then when something
really bad happens,
nobody lifts a fucking finger to help.
They just post some ego-based bullshit
to glorify their status.
Sorry.
It's fine, and I
actually agree with you.
I like him.
But seriously, this shit has got to stop.
These fucking low-life drug
dealers selling shit to kids?
I see them pushing all over Venice
like we're not supposed to notice,
like it's cool or fly or
whatever they call it.
It makes me sick.
Come on, Jay.
You hate it too.
These maladjusted creatures
invading our lives on a daily basis?
It's like nobody does shit, nobody.
They're fucking cowards,
the cops and the bullshit paperwork.
Oh, I sign this, and I'm like (mumbling).
That's not gonna save me
from a bullet, you dumb fuck.
I know it's a tough decision,
but have you guys ever
thought about moving?
Yeah, we have.
And I think it'd be super healthy.
Then they win.
Jared, do you have anything
that's like under proof stashed away?
I think I can find something.
Be right back.
I totally understand where
you're coming from, Linda.
And I admire both of your courage
to stand up for what you believe in.
But to be honest, I worry about you, guys.
Sometimes, when Jay
and I are up on our roof,
I look out to the ocean
where it meets the sun,
and it's so beautiful.
And then I forget about
what's living below us.
And I remember why we
struggled all these years
to preserve the peace.
Defend it now, I guess.
It's our home.
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
Look.
Listen.
Try to absorb the fear.
I learned, I learned, I
learned my lesson now.
My words, I live and die by my words.
I don't exist.
I'm only what is.
(indistinct chatter)
(Milles knocking)
Yeah?
Yeah, excuse me, officer.
My name is Milles Carpis.
I'd like to know what's
happening with the investigation
concerning Melissa Maddox.
Melissa Maddox.
She was murdered recently
and found in a fucking
dumpster near Venice Beach.
And your involvement is?
She was my girlfriend.
Means you fill out a statement.
I already filled out
on the police report.
You have it in the system.
My name is Milles Carpis.
The deceased is Melissa Maddox.
Got it.
Take a seat and see if there's anyone
available to talk to you.
(indistinct chatter)
Come here, please.
Please take a seat.
I'll stand.
How can I help you?
I'm here about the
murder of Melissa Maddox.
She was found dead the
other day in a trash bin.
The investigation is
ongoing at the moment.
I saw at least four
cameras on the street.
They say she was kidnapped.
Have you even checked them?
We checked.
Three weren't working.
The one that was working, it was so bad.
Can't be of any use.
So you've got nothing.
We're waiting for
witnesses to come forward,
but we have a community
involvement problem around here.
What about that protest
march a few weeks ago?
I was hoping that would
be the turning point.
But you'd be surprised
how who people forget.
So what if nobody comes forward?
We keep pursuing it.
Not good enough.
Milles, I'm sorry for your loss.
I truly am.
But there's only so much we can do.
There's only so much you can do.
I would hate to hear
that you stepped outside
the law with this.
(dramatic music)
Don't worry.
You won't hear about it.
Hey.
Where did you serve?
How do you know that?
Just a hunch.
Kuwait.
I want you to know,
I appreciate your service.
I'll check back with you.
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
Don't breathe too deep, my man.
This stuff will cause you to see things
you might not be ready to face.
What does it show you?
Everything you see.
But as it truly is,
the seasoning, brother,
the earth's pulse vibrating through me,
like a heartbeat connected to all things.
That's what Melissa
used to try to show me.
Now she's dead.
You have to get past
the physical rubbing.
Feel her love.
It's here, holding you.
Don't get wrapped up in the hate, my man.
It will blind you and
complicate your journey.
(dramatic music)
How's it going?
Hey, man.
Honestly don't know at this point.
That's okay, man.
It's gonna take a while.
Hey, got a stack of
bills you got there, bro.
Yeah.
I got enough to keep my phone on,
but I'm gonna have to take
out a mortgage on the rest.
What about the shop?
I had to close it.
The landlord was really cool though.
He didn't even trip that I
was in breach of my lease.
He took what I gave him
and he let me stay open.
Melissa was helping me
cover the utilities,
so we were good for a while.
You still got all your
equipment and your machines?
Right there.
Yeah.
Cool, man, that's great.
Why don't you start tattooing out here?
Really?
Yeah.
Might have to hit you up for
a little bit of ink though.
Um, deal.
- Sweet, it's awesome.
- Cool.
Oh, shit, Mandy.
Hey, Mandy.
- Hey.
What are you doing right now?
I'm just at the
apartment hanging with Tai.
What's going on?
[Mandy] I bought some trash bags.
I'm actually getting
ready to go do a cleanup
along the Pacific Coast Highway.
Do you wanna come with me?
I could use the help.
Um.
Yeah, under one condition.
[Mandy] Okay, what is it?
Hang on.
You wanna go me with and Mandy?
Yeah, it'd be cool.
Um, can use an extra
hand, Tai wants to help.
[Mandy] Of course.
Yeah, that would be great.
Okay.
You remember the address, right?
- Yeah.
- Okay, so just text me
when you're close.
[Mandy] Sounds like a plan.
Okay, bye.
[Mandy] Bye.
I'll be damned.
What is it?
It's nothing.
Melissa and I used to go up
the coast on the weekends
and pick up trash together too.
You'll be okay?
Yeah, I'm good.
(dramatic music)
Hey, man, I can't keep up with you now.
Come on, have pity on
the old man, alright?
- Whoa.
- Oh.
Holy shit, man, you trying
to give us a heart attack?
[Tai] Wow, man, that's quite a haul.
- No joke.
- Man, I can't believe
how much crap is on this coastline, bro.
- Well.
- Maybe, I can.
I really appreciate
you guys for helping.
- It's nothing.
- No, it's not nothing.
Can you imagine if everyone did this?
Shoot, you're preaching
to the choir, Mandy.
I'm running around my neighborhood,
and everybody thinks I'm nuts, man,
'cause I'm over there
with my little trash bag
picking up trash, and it's like nobody
freaking cares anymore, you know?
Well, I think it's
awesome that you do that.
So what inspired you to do this?
My sister.
She used to come up here on weekends
and just spend hours picking up trash.
How did you know that?
She always invited me.
She never told me that.
No.
Well, I never came.
I guess I was just too
self-absorbed at the time
to realize what she was trying to do.
She cared about life on so many levels,
and you know, so I wanna do this for her.
And because now, I see what's possible.
And she taught me that.
I just wish that I could tell her.
(indistinct chatter)
What?
I hate that shit.
Yeah, me too.
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
We'll go with you.
No, no, it's okay, I got it.
Are you sure?
I'm sure.
Okay, go.
(indistinct chatter)
You know, be a series regular.
- Hey, guys.
- Hi.
I'm sorry to bother you,
but can I ask you something?
Oh, sorry, we don't have spare change.
That's not what I was gonna ask you.
Okay, what is it?
Well, would you mind
picking up your trash
and taking it with you?
Excuse me?
Well, I couldn't help but notice
that you were wiping
the sand from your feet
with those tissues and then
just threw them on the ground
and also left your drinks in the sand.
Yeah. (Laughs)
Yeah?
So?
Well, it's nothing personal really,
but if you could just pick up
your trash and throw it away,
I'd really appreciate
it because it's just,
this is a really beautiful place,
and I'd hate to see it ruined.
Is this your property?
What do you mean?
I mean, this beach, those
houses, you own any of it?
Well, that's not the point.
We all share this planet.
We all breathe the same air.
The earth is our mother, not a trash can.
And she deserves our love and support
for the miracles that she gives us.
(both chuckling)
God.
Sir, please don't ignore me.
Listen, crazy girl.
I am not interested in
your opinions, okay?
So why don't you go back to Berkeley
or wherever it is that you picked up
those goddamn hippie cult
fucking woo-woo ideas
and mind your own goddamn business?
This is my business.
(gasps)
Yeah?
Take a fucking shower
and get a fucking job.
Don't play with ignorance,
it won't save you.
You know the truth like most people,
you just won't admit it.
You're a hypocrite.
But I bet you can hear the ticking sound.
I don't have time
for this bullshit, man.
- That's right. You don't.
Can you hear it now?
Can you hear it now?
Yes, sir.
The ticking in your chest.
Do you have time now to
witness my sister's conviction
with love and understanding?
Yes, sir, I'm very sorry.
Tell her that.
I'm very sorry if I offended you.
I don't believe you.
Tell her that, again.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
You see, life is precious, isn't it?
Isn't it?
Right?
I believe you.
I want you to do something for me.
Yeah?
Pick up your trash,
get in that thing you drive, and leave.
And don't come back.
Yeah.
And if you call the fucking cops,
I'm gonna find you and I'm
gonna take this pistol,
and I'm gonna shove it
fucking way up that big ass.
Okay?
- Okay.
Okay, go have a nice day.
Go ahead.
Get in the fucking car.
Get in the fucking car.
I guess she's pissed.
Yeah.
Have a nice day.
Hey, Mandy, you okay?
You son of a bitch!
Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
It's okay, brother, it's okay.
What the fuck was that all about?
What are you talking about?
Oh, come off it, tough guy.
You know what the hell I mean.
Mandy, chill out.
Everything here is happening
in harmony with what we believe.
You think my sister would support
or respect what you just did?
What's happening to you?
[Abby] Honey, when you get this,
I need you to come by the
condo as soon as possible.
It's really important.
I'll be here all day.
Love you.
Oh, what is it?
It's Jay and Linda.
- What happened?
- I got a call
from Linda's dad.
They were attacked.
[Mandy] Oh, my god.
Where?
Earlier today in brought daylight,
right in front of the condo.
Did anyone see who did it?
Did they catch them?
No, ho one saw anything.
Her dad said that Linda was screaming
when the cops showed up.
Jay was unconscious.
[Mandy] Oh, my God.
I feel horrible.
I know that she's a good friend of yours.
I feel responsible for this.
What?
Why?
I showed them the property,
and I feel like I could
have been more honest
about certain elements
of the neighborhood.
I didn't know it was gonna be a war zone,
and I feel like they
really love the place.
Abby, they did.
Linda loves the place and Venice,
and believe me, she was not
leaving without a fight.
(dramatic music)
Okay.
(dramatic music continues)
[Charles] Maybe I haven't done enough.
I might be ashamed of
that, for not doing enough.
For not giving enough.
For not being more perceptive.
For not being aware enough.
For not understanding.
For being stupid.
Maybe I should have killed 400-500 people,
then I would have felt better.
Then when I felt like I've
really offered society something.
You know, if I wanted to kill somebody,
I'd take this book and
beat you to death with it,
and I wouldn't feel a thing.
It'd be just like
walking to the drugstore.
I've learned to reflect.
I just reflect back.
I know I don't know.
I know I'm stupid.
I admit, I'm a pity, whatever.
I never been a success at anything.
I even got to the point
where I didn't want-
(dramatic music)
I remember what we
talked about in the van.
Our mission is one of non-violence.
And it makes me nervous
when you listen to that Manson interview.
I just feel like it affects
you in a negative way.
And I feel like a fucking coward
sitting in this corner doing nothing.
And I can't understand why
you don't feel the same way.
They were your friends.
Of course, I'm upset about
it just as much as you are.
But what are you gonna do about it?
It seems like nonviolence
only does so much,
and then you need somebody
like me to stand behind you.
I'm not gonna let hate
influence my thinking.
I'll be going to the hospital
just as soon as they say I can visit.
Love is the cure.
And I know that in your
heart, you know that.
(dramatic music)
Can you please give your knife?
(dramatic music)
Please?
And promise me that you'll
get rid of that gun.
You gotta promise me.
I promise you.
Do you guys want something to drink?
- Yes, please.
- Water?
Okay.
- Oh, actually, Tai,
can I talk to you for a second?
Sure.
I'm really worried he's
gonna try and do something
in retaliation because of Jay and Linda.
Can you just do me a favor
and like keep an eye out on him for me?
Listen, don't worry about it.
I'll talk to him.
He just needs a little time to breathe.
Hey, brother.
- Hey.
- Can I talk to you for a sec?
- Sure.
What's up?
Hey, listen.
I think tomorrow we should go
on a hike in Topanga Canyon.
I think it's good medicine for us,
and it gives us a chance
to clear our heads.
I don't know.
Mandy may want me to go with
her to the hospital tomorrow.
That's not a problem.
We'll go early,
and then we'll meet the
girls at the hospital.
Is that okay?
Yes.
- Sure, why not?
- Sweet.
- All right, you okay?
- Yeah, I'm okay.
(dramatic music)
Hey, Tai, you know what?
You were right.
This is what I needed.
It feels good to be outside today.
Yeah, I forgot how peaceful
life could seem in a place like this.
Always works for me.
Even here, they have to
leave proof of what they are.
I know it's frustrating, man.
But that's why I brought extra bags.
That way, we can have a great hike today.
With respect, brother,
do you think it'll make any difference
what we do at this point?
Los Angeles is gonna burn.
And I think it's a blessing.
Look, man, I know you've lost faith,
and I understand why.
But I battle the same demons that you do.
And how do you cope with
all the shit around this time?
Sometimes, I can't.
Sometimes, I'm like, "Fuck it, I'm done."
I just wanna go home and
eat a fucking bullet.
But here we are, one foot in
paradise, the other in hell.
It's kind of like when we
were in the war, Milles.
We had to fight then, you gotta fight now.
It doesn't have to make
fucking sense, all right?
You just gotta keep moving forward
and hope for something better.
I never considered that you
might have the same thoughts
running through your mind as me.
Yeah, I do.
So why don't we just keep walking,
and maybe we'll have better thoughts?
Okay.
(birds chirping)
I got this.
You sure?
Yeah.
Yeah, I got it.
Hey, man.
Do y'all mind doing that somewhere else?
There's a place down in Venice.
There's a wall.
A lot of graffiti artists go down there
and paint some murals.
There's a lot of great art down there.
Do I look like a graffiti artist to you?
What makes you think
I'm a graffiti artist?
- My bad, I just-
- What?
- I just-
- You just what?
I just thought, man.
Get the fuck out of here bro.
Come right here?
- Yeah.
Fuck you want, dog?
You think you can just touch me or what?
Yeah, go ahead.
Touch me again.
- Hey, I apologize.
- What?
I apologize.
I had no right to touch you, man.
Change your mind?
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
We'll just go, man.
- Yeah.
- Milles, let's go.
- Get the fuck out of here.
Milles, let's go.
Yeah, Milles, go.
Please give me a reason to shoot you dead.
No, not feeling it?
Did mortality suddenly
reveal something to you?
God, man, I was just
fucking around, bro.
Take his gun.
What's your name?
Jesus.
Jesus, I want you to
do something for me.
I want you to lay down on the
ground face first behind me,
with your arms stretched
out, kind of like Jesus.
Come on.
It's okay.
No?
Would you rather I just
shoot you in the face?
- No.
- Then get on the ground.
Come on.
Slow.
Bend your knees.
Let him go.
Keep your gun on this guy.
You believe in God?
Yeah.
Let's wait and see if God saves you.
Your friend isn't going
to, he just ran away.
Hey, loco, I'm sure
you're smart enough to know
that if you kill me,
you kill yourself too.
That's the plan, my brother.
So don't take this personal,
it's not about you.
You see the man pointing the gun at you?
Yeah.
Do you know how many people
him and I killed in Iraq?
No.
Too many.
(dramatic music)
(Jesus grunting)
[Melissa] We are afraid to choose love.
Don't let the chaos blind you.
It doesn't have to be about darkness.
[Mandy] Our mission
is one of nonviolence.
I would hate to hear
that you stepped outside
the law about this.
Don't get wrapped up in the hate, man.
But I battle the same
demons that you do.
One foot in paradise, the other in hell.
(Milles grunting)
(dramatic music)
(birds chirping)
Hey, man, snap out of it.
We gotta go, we gotta get
the fuck out of here, man.
Let's go.
Let's go, come on.
(dramatic music)
(sirens wailing)
(monitor beeping)
Hey, sunshine.
Hey little fireball.
Are you cold, you need a blanket?
Oh, easy, honey.
Don't fight it, just, here take my hand.
I killed him.
[Mandy] What?
No, no, please don't say that.
It wasn't your fault.
Yes, it is.
At least Jay is in a better place now.
No longer in this hell.
You have to leave this place.
It's a lie.
Don't let the lights deceive you.
It's a prison.
Oh, Milles.
Poor soul.
Help him.
Don't let him fall.
I won't.
I won't.
(indistinct chatter)
(dramatic music)
Help me, help me.
Milles.
No.
Fuck.
(dramatic music)
Yeah, hey Mandy, it's me.
I'm with Tai.
Can you please tell Abby to open the gate?
We're here.
You guys take the scenic route?
There was a crash on the freeway.
Got held up.
You know, I've been calling you.
I'm sorry, man, I didn't get the call.
You wanna tell me what happened?
We got jumped by some damn
thugs on the trail, okay?
I didn't ask you, Tai.
Is that what happened?
What happened?
Yeah, Tai, why don't you
tell them what happened?
A guy pulled a gun on us.
[Mandy] Where, on the trail?
Yeah, we were picking up trash.
And I look up, these guys are throwing
little gang signs on rocks
and spraying 'em up there
and he grabs the guy with the gun,
and all of a sudden, that guy fell.
This is crazy.
It's not your fault.
Really.
We love you unconditionally.
You know what I think?
I think you guys are
beautiful, all of you.
And if I could invent
a fantasy to live in,
it would be this one, with all of you.
But I don't deserve it.
Sorry.
Don't.
Listen to me.
I strangled that guy and watched him die.
He had a gun but he didn't pull it.
Tai would.
I'm no hero, Mandy.
I'm a murderer.
I made a promise to you, right?
And I broke it.
I don't deserve you, or any of this.
Let me go.
It doesn't matter.
Love is secure, remember?
And I love you.
You're coming with us.
I can't.
Don't you understand?
You guys would all end up
in prison because of me,
and I couldn't live with it.
I'm done.
What about Manson?
What about him?
What would he do?
I don't know what he would do.
But I know what he said.
When you take a life, you owe a life.
I gotta go.
Hey, man.
Don't leave without saying goodbye.
I'm sorry, man.
I just thought it'd be easier this way.
I appreciate what you said.
You almost made me believe it.
It's my circle, remember?
You saw what I did.
I know.
I know, man.
I love you, bro.
In this life or the next.
We'll find you.
I'm sorry.
Hey.
It's a long walk to Venice.
Thanks.
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
(birds chirping)
(helicopter whirring)
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
(dramatic music)
[Melissa] My darling man.
I thought you might like this book.
I know it's hard for you
to read this type of stuff.
I offer it not to change who you are,
because to me, you're perfect.
Only that you might see what
is possible without fear.
I love you and want so
much for you to find peace.
Always.
Melissa.
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
(Mandy screaming)
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
(indistinct chatter on radio)
You know they're coming for you, right?
Yeah.
I figured they would.
What now?
Well, did you notice the sun today,
shining down, nice and warm?
Cold breeze?
Yeah, I did.
Start with that.
Can't argue with perfection.
I'm gonna miss you, man.
I'll always be here for you.
When you're ready.
(knocking on door)
Milles.
It's Detective Anderson.
Face down, spread your
legs, arms, palms up.
I know you're in there, Milles.
I need you to do what I'm saying.
I'm asking you.
(loud thud)
You are not listening to me.
It's okay.
Milles, do not get up.
Get back down on the ground.
I need you to stay on
the ground, face down.
Please don't make this
hard on both of us, bro.
Milles, stand back.
You're not listening.
Stand the fuck back, I'm warning you.
Do not do what you're doing.
Baby!
(dramatic music)
(gunshots firing)
(dramatic music)
Is it that you recall
Being in harmony
Is there someone in you
That yearns to see
Or do you remember a
time when you were free
Could it be the real you
wants just to see
Did you ever wonder
what you're living for
Is it that you recall
Being in harmony
Is there someone in you
(dramatic music continues)
Melissa?
(dramatic music)
Well, when company comes,
you always stick the dirt in the back.
If you're outside and you
live a life on the outside,
outside world programs people
into education and knowledge.
The mind that you live in,
the thought that you live in,
the inside unprogrammed people
to wisdom and understanding.
His eyes reach in the conscious
mind, in the foreground.
He's lost sight of his children.
He doesn't see in the back.
He doesn't see in the shadows.
He doesn't see on the roadside.
He doesn't see in the back of the cells.
He doesn't see in the
yard, in the penitentiary.
(people grunting)
He doesn't see the bottom,
the bottom of the world.
People in here are just your reflection.
They're your mistakes.
They weren't born rebelling.
They weren't born with anger
and frustration that they have.
That had to be put on them by somebody.
Somebody created them.
Aren't we all born to die?
(dramatic music)
(birds chirping)
(wind rustling)
[Charlie] It is like
a guy come up to me once
and he was freaking out
on acid and he said,
"Oh, man, I'm going crazy.
He said, everything is all fucked up, man.
The world is all miserable."
And I said, "No, it ain't, brother."
"Man," I said, "Everything's all right.
Everything's in harmony, man."
I said, "Everything's perfect."
I said, "Can't you see perfection?"
Look at it in yourself.
He said it is, I said yeah.
I said, "It's a nice day, man.
Look, the sun's out and
everybody's having a good day."
I said, "It's a wonderful day."
I said, "Can't you appreciate that?"
And he said, "Sure."
I said, "Well, then relax your mind, man.
Get all that negative vibration out of you
and go on down the road
and have a good day, man."
So he came back two or three
hours later and he said,
"I killed somebody."
I know who that is.
Do you?
Yeah.
And that's the Berkeley interview,
February 25th, 1985.
Wow, you do know.
It's kind of bizarre that you
know that, don't you think?
Yeah, but I'm not the one
carrying the tape recorder.
But for what it's worth, I
think that was probably the most
truthful interview he's ever given.
It was brilliant.
And no media bullshit.
So you just come here and pick up trash?
Well, the ranch is gone.
They burnt it down years ago.
This cave is all that's left.
Most people see it as some
evil relic from the past,
but to me, it's sacred.
So I look after it.
(soft dramatic music)
I think he'd really appreciate
what you're doing here.
(dramatic music continues)
I know I do.
- I'm Milles.
- Melissa.
That's a nice bracelet
that you have there.
(soft dramatic music)
Let me help you.
I don't wanna break it.
You're welcome.
There you go.
Thank you.
You're so sweet.
It's like a little cell phone thing.
Oh, my God, let's kill it.
Kill it.
Kill all the cell phones.
(soft dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
(helicopter whirring)
(dramatic music)
[Charlie] And then
when I got out of prison,
I went out in the mountains
and I looked around
and I sat down and I seen
the water all polluted.
I've seen the trees being cut down.
I've seen this concrete
maze that man has made,
and it's like I had
come from another place
that's not the same as the place
that you guys or that world lives in.
And I thought, "Well,
who's responsible for this?"
Whose job is this to make sure
that we got air here to breathe,
because I'm gonna run
out of air here, man,
"or this whole planet's
gonna run out of air."
And I say, "Man, the life
they're killing is mine."
And then I go out and they're cutting
the big old tree down.
And I say, "Oh, I feel that.
I feel what are you're doing."
You're cutting me down here.
So I tell them, "Don't cut
me down or I'll shoot you.
If you keep cutting the trees
down, I'm gonna cut you down."
And he said, "Well, look,
I got a wife and kids
and I need the money.
I have two jobs and I
don't know anything else."
And I said, "Well, I can't blame you.
Who's your boss?"
Seriously, the Charlie
Manson that you've created,
that's not me.
That's only an illusion in your minds.
"It hasn't got anything to do with me."
(soft gentle music)
(engine revving in background)
(soft music continues)
What are you thinking about?
Sometimes, I stare at the ocean.
I can feel how vast it is.
Like it's enveloping me.
Mm.
And I forget where I am.
Where do you think you are?
I try not to think
about that one, Melissa.
I do.
I can't help it.
I've always felt this way until recently.
What way?
This weight, pressing
down on me my entire life,
pushing me closer to the ground,
having to constantly fight to stand up
and look at a world that can
be so beautiful one minute,
terrifying the next.
Everything we've been taught
about our existence is a lie.
But the day I looked in
the mirror and I realized
what was staring back at
me was just an illusion,
I felt this freedom connected me to life
beyond this physical body,
and that I could exist in
other worlds without limits.
I want so much for you
to know that freedom too.
Knowing you is that freedom.
(dramatic music)
(birds chirping)
(dramatic music continues)
Hey guys, how's it going? (Chuckles)
It's said you're a young girl
And you don't know right from wrong
It's said by people
Who cannot sing your song
You let them watch the magic
But remain within yourself strong
(faint music playing in background)
Oh shit.
(faint music playing in background)
Hey, babe.
Hey, babe.
What time is it?
It's 10:00.
Oh, shit, okay.
Yeah.
Oh, look at you.
Oh, shit.
You see anything you like?
- Yes.
- Yeah.
Oh, I do see something I like.
- Always.
- You gonna see
Tai again today?
Um, yeah.
I'm really glad you're
comfortable with him.
Me too.
Don't tell him I said those.
(Melissa chuckles)
I got a man crush.
I feel like we'd be
kind of become friends.
I knew you'd like him.
Yeah, you're right.
Yeah.
You know, some of these
physical therapists, I feel like
they lose interest in their
clients after a while.
You know, it's like they
don't take the time,
just the money.
There's so many people like that.
I don't get why they choose
jobs that help people
when they don't really give a fuck
about the people they're treating.
It's just sad.
Yeah.
Greed, greed.
- Yeah.
It's really sad that
money is the only thing
that motivates them.
You know what's cool though?
- What?
- Tai likes to hike.
[Melissa] I know, see? (Chuckles)
And there's a couple of
trails up in Topanga Canyon.
- Oh.
- Oh, yeah.
[Melissa] Baby, that's great.
We're gonna plan a hike soon.
- Yes.
- Yes.
- I'm so happy, babe.
- Me too.
Well, my love, I better
take off before I'm late.
Okay.
Hey, remember that
restaurant in Hollywood?
I think it was The Key.
- Yes.
- Right?
Yeah, I knew that'd get your attention.
Let me take you there tonight.
- Okay.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
- Cool.
Let's do that.
I'll meet you here after work.
We can grab an Uber.
Well, you know what?
I'll just take the bus.
I'll meet you there like around seven.
- Okay.
- Is that cool?
All right, well, I'll
see you then, babe.
Give me a kiss.
Be safe, okay?
- I will.
- I love you.
- Love you too.
Your appointment's at 11:00.
(Milles chuckles)
(sighs) Thank you God for Melissa.
(soft dramatic music)
(loud thudding)
- Fucking shit!
Fuck, fuck, fuck.
(dramatic music continues)
Fuck you, man, just fucking do this.
Fucking face.
Fucking cunt.
Fucking God.
(suspenseful music)
(car engine starting)
(suspenseful music continues)
Fuck, fuck.
(suspenseful music)
(suspenseful music continues)
(suspenseful music continues)
How are you?
You know what?
I actually woke up
feeling well rested today.
Well, that's good.
Let's get you comfortable.
So you're sleeping better?
Oh.
Woo.
Yeah, I think so.
I feel like Melissa's influence
has something to do with it.
I wake up to this whisper
that is her voice,
and there she is, just sitting next to me.
I don't know.
It's called love, brother.
And I'm pretty sure
she feels the same way.
Don't tell her I said that.
Deal.
(suspenseful music)
Tell me about the nightmare
since our last session.
Occasionally.
But it's not like it used to be.
I can pull myself out now.
It's like being awake in a dream,
knowing you're dreaming.
So it's not as scary.
Before, it used to feel so real, you know?
Like I was dying or in hell
and all these dead people.
I'm sorry, man.
I know that's some heavy shit.
- No.
I'm here to help you, I'm
not here to judge you.
Thanks, Tai, I appreciate that.
Can I get you to lay down?
Let's put this under here.
Oh.
Do that, yeah.
So when I apply gentle pressure right here
to the base of your skull, what I'm doing
is I'm releasing cerebral spinal fluid.
Sometimes, it gets blocked due to like
physical or emotional trauma.
Okay.
In other words, I'm
treating you for PTSD.
Oh, okay, I know what that is.
(suspenseful music)
Take it.
Just take it.
(Melissa screaming)
(Melissa sobbing)
Save me, someone!
Tai, you okay?
(Melissa screaming)
Did you say you saw
Melissa this morning?
Yeah.
I was with her man.
I'm staying with her now.
(man grunting)
Where's she at?
She's at work.
(soft dramatic music)
(phone ringing)
[Jared] Hello, Cabin Creek Crystal.
Yeah, hi, is this Jared?
- Speaking.
- Yeah, hi, Jared.
This is Milles, Melissa's boyfriend.
Can you please put her on the phone?
I really need to talk
to her, it's important.
[Jared] Oh, man, hey.
I am so glad you called.
She was supposed to open this morning,
and I got a call that no one showed up.
Is everything okay?
Do you know where she is?
No, I don't know where she
is. I'll call her cell, thanks.
(phone ringing)
[Melissa] Hey, it's Melissa.
Leave a message, please.
Yeah, hi baby, it's me.
Can you please call me?
I just called your job and
they said you're not there.
I'm worried.
Call me as soon as you
get this message, okay?
I love you.
Bye.
Hey, I'm Milles, Melissa's boyfriend.
Are you Jared?
- Yeah, Milles.
I called you earlier, you remember?
Melissa didn't come in this morning.
Something wrong?
Is she missing?
- Yeah.
Yeah, we think so.
Everything okay, dad?
Everything's fine, sweetheart.
This is Milles, Melissa's boyfriend.
Hi Milles, I'm Mary.
Hey, Mary.
We've been worried too.
It's not like her to be late
or not show up for no reason.
She always calls if there's a problem.
Sorry, we couldn't be more help.
Wait a minute, have you tried calling
Melissa's sister, Mandy?
I've never even met Mandy.
I don't think Melissa and
Mandy speak too often.
I'll tell you what, if you don't mind,
leave me your phone number,
and I'll try to reach her.
- Sure.
Thanks, Jared.
I'm sorry about this one.
It's okay, man.
No problem, no worries.
If you hear from her, let me know.
- I will.
- Okay.
Listen, I'm gonna head
back to the apartment.
Maybe she should have got sick
or something and went home.
Okay, alright.
Hey, you need a ride?
- No, I'm gonna walk.
It's not that far, the traffic's
just gonna slow me down.
Okay, well, what about your bike?
I chained my bike to your fence, man.
If they steal, they steal.
I don't care, I just gotta go, okay?
- Milles.
- I'll be okay.
(suspenseful music)
(children laughing)
Melissa.
(dramatic music)
Melissa.
(soft dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
(suspenseful music)
(suspenseful music continues)
(Milles gasps)
(dramatic music)
Your dress book.
Okay.
(suspenseful music)
Come on, pick up, man.
Pick up, Jared, pick up.
Somebody pick up their phone, please.
Jared, this is-
Jared, can you hear me?
I don't need a text message.
I need a human being to talk to me.
Where's my fucking girlfriend?
I can't do it.
I can't fuck this in.
I can't do it, man.
No, no, no, no, no, listen to me.
(stuttering) I'm her boyfriend.
(Milles screaming)
It's combat, bro.
It's combat, it's combat.
It's combat.
[Mandy] Hi, Milles.
This is Mandy, I'm Melissa's sister.
Jared gave me your number, but
you and I, we've never met.
But I know who you are.
Melissa's told me about you.
I'm gonna text you an address.
Can you please just meet me there?
Like just like as soon as you can.
Okay?
(suspenseful music)
I am sorry, this is really hard.
I know.
I do know.
I understand.
I'm right here.
(dramatic music)
(Mandy gasps and sobs)
No!
That's her. (Sobbing)
It's okay, it's okay.
It's okay, it's okay.
Okay?
You're okay, you're okay, okay?
I'm Detective Kelly.
I really need this.
What is your relationship to the deceased?
She's my sister.
And you are Mandy Maddox, correct?
Yes.
Thank you.
Thanks.
Here are your sister's possessions.
They were discovered on
the body at the site.
(Mandy sobbing)
Can someone please just tell me
what happened to my sister?
We have a statement from a woman
who discovered your sister,
but it was after the fact.
And we don't have any witnesses yet
to help us determine the cause,
although there's an ongoing
investigation in the area
to see if anyone saw your sister prior.
Prior to what?
What did they do to her?
She was abducted.
We have an anonymous witness
who's come forward and
said they saw a young woman
fitting the description of your sister
being carried into a van.
Where?
On the corner of Speedway
and South Venice Boulevard.
That's it?
For now.
We have to perform an
official autopsy to be certain,
but from what I've observed
in my initial examination
is that your sister
experienced severe head trauma,
more than likely from a blunt object.
And there's some indication
at the base of her neck.
Miss Maddox, I'm sorry, but
I also should inform you
that there was some signs of rape.
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
(soft dramatic music)
I'm gonna need a name if
you're here for the service.
Milles Carpis.
(soft dramatic music)
Are you Alvin and Kathleen Maddox?
[Alvin] Yes.
I recognize you from pictures
that Melissa showed me.
I'm Milles Carpis.
I just wanted to tell you
about how much I love your daughter,
and that she changed my life
in the short time that I was with her.
She was my world,
my angel here on earth.
And I don't understand why
something like this could happen
to someone with such an innocent soul.
Are you saying you dated our daughter?
No, I was her boyfriend
and was living with her.
Really?
Because she never mentioned anything about
being intimate with a man twice her age.
There's a lot of things
she didn't tell you,
and I'm not sure why.
I just wanted to finally meet you both
and maybe share a moment
for Melissa's sake.
But it isn't necessary.
What do you plan to do now?
I'm gonna have a
conversation with the police
and find out what's going
on with their investigation.
I mean, with the apartment.
You say you live there with Melissa.
Is your name on the lease?
No.
Well, you should know
we'll be collecting
all of her possessions from
the apartment this week.
Do you plan on staying at the apartment?
I don't know.
Okay, maybe you should
get your things and leave.
Do you understand?
Yeah, he understands.
He'll get his stuff this week.
You okay with that?
Sure, no problem.
Listen, I wanna tell you both something.
You may not know me or even
like me, and that's okay.
Well, Melissa talked a
lot about the both of you
and how alone and ignored
she felt living with you.
That's why she left.
Don't blame me for that.
Hey, where you going?
I just need to walk, okay?
Okay, hey, I'll find you later.
I'll call you.
- Okay, yeah.
- I'll handle this.
- Okay.
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
Thanks, Charles.
I know you knew her.
We're all connected, every one of us.
Then why doesn't anybody care?
All is not lost, Milles.
Hang in there.
You know where to find
me if you need to talk.
(dramatic music)
[Mandy] Hi Milles, it's Mandy.
Will you please call me?
I'm so sorry about the funeral.
I just found out what
happened with my parents.
I didn't even know that you were outside.
I was in the church.
I would've never let
them talk to you that way
had I been there.
I know how much you loved my sister.
Will you please call me
just to let me know that you're okay?
I'm gonna text you an address.
It's a restaurant in Venice.
Me, Jared, Abby, and his daughter Mary
are gonna meet up there
tonight around seven.
I spoke to your friend Tai after you left
and he said he'd call you.
Please come meet us there.
I promise my parents won't be there.
But either way, please just let
me know you're okay, please?
Okay, bye.
(dramatic music)
So this is apparently what happened.
So Milles goes to the funeral, obviously,
and my parents wouldn't let him in.
They kicked him out.
- That's wrong.
I know.
Does he realize that he's a combat guy?
He was in Desert Storm just like we were.
- No way.
- Yes.
- Wow.
- You know,
I didn't even know that.
That just makes me feel fucking worse.
Are you kidding me?
I mean, that's ridiculous
that they wouldn't let him in.
(phone ringing)
You have a reservation?
(ringing continues)
You don't remember me?
I used to come here all the
time with my girlfriend Melissa.
We get a lot of people
in here every day.
I don't remember every face.
I remember you.
Your name's Vincent.
I remember how nice you were to us.
Melissa really loved this place.
Look, I can't help you
if you don't have a reservation, buddy.
I mean, you're not even properly dressed.
I'm not your fucking buddy.
You're not even human.
You're a fucking zombie,
going through life on autopilot
like all the other
zombies with your phone.
Tap, tap, tap, tap.
Sir, you need to calm down.
I'm gonna call the cops.
I'm calm, call 'em.
Maybe they can tell me
who killed my girlfriend
and why they dumped her
body in a fucking trash bin.
Look, I'm sorry.
We've just come from a funeral.
He's obviously very upset.
It was his girlfriend.
(phone ringing)
It's okay.
Go ahead.
I'm sorry for your loss.
Drinks are on me.
I'm sorry about that.
No, don't.
It's okay, we all understand.
We already ordered some dishes to share.
We can order you something
else if you don't like it.
That's fine, Abby, I'm not picky.
Well, at least we're
gonna get free drinks.
- I know.
- Like you need more now.
This is our favorite restaurant.
I think, right?
- Yeah.
Well, yeah, she has much
better taste than you.
I'm sorry-
(conversation drowns)
(suspenseful music)
(people laughing)
I'm sorry.
- Well.
- All together, yes.
[Abby] We need to like exchange,
we need to like make this a thing.
Yeah, a thing.
Melissa's magnificent.
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
What's wrong, babe?
Nothing.
No, don't do that.
- Do what?
- Pretend.
It's not who you are and
it's not what I want.
Talk to me.
I don't wanna ruin it.
Ruin what?
This moment.
I know why you brought me here.
It's beautiful.
And I don't wanna taint the memory of it.
Hey, you love me?
Everything I am, yeah.
And I love you.
Now, be honest.
What's bothering you?
You know, Melissa,
most people think of hell
as some fucking dungeon under the earth
with fire and demons and shit.
And God sends you there.
From what I've seen, God
has nothing to do with it.
Hell is a place where there is nothing
but the worst things
that man is capable of.
I was not ashamed of the
hatred that I had to bear.
I shared it with them.
They just didn't know.
In their point of view, I was
just some savage crusader,
a devil sent by a country
of devils to kill.
And that's what I did.
Followed the mission.
Find weapons of mass destruction.
(loud explosion)
We had weapons.
We used them.
Bodies dropped, people died.
Grave sites, mass grave
sites with women and children
were stacked on top of
each other, birth to death.
And destruction.
We left the wake of that
with each step that we took over there.
We found what we were looking for.
We found ourselves.
(dramatic music)
Hello?
[Mandy] Hey, Milles.
Oh, hey, Mandy.
How are you?
[Mandy] I am actually
feeling better today.
I'm glad.
What's going on, what are you up to?
[Mandy] Well, I was supposed to show
a property this morning,
but my client bailed on me.
So I'm actually in Venice.
Isn't that your neck of the woods?
Yeah, I'm staying with Tai.
He lives in Venice.
[Mandy] Oh, well, if you'd
like, I could swing by.
Maybe some fresh air
would be good for you.
Well, yeah, no, I'd like that.
[Mandy] Cool, just text me your address.
Okay, I will.
Okay, bye.
[Mandy] See ya.
(dramatic music)
Are you okay?
It's okay.
Come on.
(birds chirping)
(soft dramatic music)
[Charles] Paper and all that.
All this paper comes from trees.
Shame to waste all the
trees right in this trash
for your children to be raised up in.
Do you want your children to live
according to the gospel of Helter Skelter?
Who is that speaking?
[Charles] I've seen this
concrete maze that man has made,
and it's like I had
come from another place.
Charles Manson.
Do you mind turning it off?
Sure.
(dramatic music)
It was your sister's.
The tape or the recorder?
Both.
She used to play it for me all the time.
We'd listen to it together.
He talked a lot about
people's lack of concern
and their ignorance
toward the environment.
Well, what do you think of this place?
I think it's beautiful.
Appreciate you taking me here.
I wanna show you something.
Hey, old friend.
(dramatic music)
I want you to do something for me.
Close your eyes.
Trust me.
Do you feel that?
I feel my hand against the tree.
Okay.
We're gonna take a deep breath.
Breathe in slow,
and let it out.
How does that make you feel?
It makes me feel calm.
You can open your eyes.
(dramatic music)
Look at me.
(dramatic music continues)
It doesn't have to be about darkness.
I know that you loved my sister,
and I know that you're hurting,
but you are not alone.
And the light?
It's all around us.
Can you at least try?
Yeah.
I'll try.
- Hey.
- Hi.
Oh.
How are you holding up?
Takes time.
I'm glad you both could make it.
Linda said she called you.
Yeah, yeah, she did.
I wanted to see you guys.
It's been too long.
The funeral made me realize that.
Jared, I'm sure you know Milles.
Of course.
Good to see you again, brother.
You know, I know you and
I haven't spoke much.
Melissa always spoke
extremely highly of you.
I actually used to work here
before I got my broker's license.
So I introduced Melissa to Jared
when she told me she needed a job.
Oh, okay.
Finally.
Oh, my God.
I'm so glad you're here.
I was really worried
about you, my sunshine.
You okay?
- Okay, honey.
Hey, so I wanna introduce you to Milles.
He was Melissa's boyfriend.
I'm Linda.
Nice to meet you.
I'm Milles, pleasure to meet you.
- Have a seat, guys.
- Nice to meet you.
I fucking miss you so much, seriously.
I miss you more.
Do you see that garbage on
social media the other day?
Some asshole was filming a rape.
What the fuck is wrong with people?
And all the social media posturing?
That's not life, okay?
The fake sentiment.
And then when something
really bad happens,
nobody lifts a fucking finger to help.
They just post some ego-based bullshit
to glorify their status.
Sorry.
It's fine, and I
actually agree with you.
I like him.
But seriously, this shit has got to stop.
These fucking low-life drug
dealers selling shit to kids?
I see them pushing all over Venice
like we're not supposed to notice,
like it's cool or fly or
whatever they call it.
It makes me sick.
Come on, Jay.
You hate it too.
These maladjusted creatures
invading our lives on a daily basis?
It's like nobody does shit, nobody.
They're fucking cowards,
the cops and the bullshit paperwork.
Oh, I sign this, and I'm like (mumbling).
That's not gonna save me
from a bullet, you dumb fuck.
I know it's a tough decision,
but have you guys ever
thought about moving?
Yeah, we have.
And I think it'd be super healthy.
Then they win.
Jared, do you have anything
that's like under proof stashed away?
I think I can find something.
Be right back.
I totally understand where
you're coming from, Linda.
And I admire both of your courage
to stand up for what you believe in.
But to be honest, I worry about you, guys.
Sometimes, when Jay
and I are up on our roof,
I look out to the ocean
where it meets the sun,
and it's so beautiful.
And then I forget about
what's living below us.
And I remember why we
struggled all these years
to preserve the peace.
Defend it now, I guess.
It's our home.
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
Look.
Listen.
Try to absorb the fear.
I learned, I learned, I
learned my lesson now.
My words, I live and die by my words.
I don't exist.
I'm only what is.
(indistinct chatter)
(Milles knocking)
Yeah?
Yeah, excuse me, officer.
My name is Milles Carpis.
I'd like to know what's
happening with the investigation
concerning Melissa Maddox.
Melissa Maddox.
She was murdered recently
and found in a fucking
dumpster near Venice Beach.
And your involvement is?
She was my girlfriend.
Means you fill out a statement.
I already filled out
on the police report.
You have it in the system.
My name is Milles Carpis.
The deceased is Melissa Maddox.
Got it.
Take a seat and see if there's anyone
available to talk to you.
(indistinct chatter)
Come here, please.
Please take a seat.
I'll stand.
How can I help you?
I'm here about the
murder of Melissa Maddox.
She was found dead the
other day in a trash bin.
The investigation is
ongoing at the moment.
I saw at least four
cameras on the street.
They say she was kidnapped.
Have you even checked them?
We checked.
Three weren't working.
The one that was working, it was so bad.
Can't be of any use.
So you've got nothing.
We're waiting for
witnesses to come forward,
but we have a community
involvement problem around here.
What about that protest
march a few weeks ago?
I was hoping that would
be the turning point.
But you'd be surprised
how who people forget.
So what if nobody comes forward?
We keep pursuing it.
Not good enough.
Milles, I'm sorry for your loss.
I truly am.
But there's only so much we can do.
There's only so much you can do.
I would hate to hear
that you stepped outside
the law with this.
(dramatic music)
Don't worry.
You won't hear about it.
Hey.
Where did you serve?
How do you know that?
Just a hunch.
Kuwait.
I want you to know,
I appreciate your service.
I'll check back with you.
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
Don't breathe too deep, my man.
This stuff will cause you to see things
you might not be ready to face.
What does it show you?
Everything you see.
But as it truly is,
the seasoning, brother,
the earth's pulse vibrating through me,
like a heartbeat connected to all things.
That's what Melissa
used to try to show me.
Now she's dead.
You have to get past
the physical rubbing.
Feel her love.
It's here, holding you.
Don't get wrapped up in the hate, my man.
It will blind you and
complicate your journey.
(dramatic music)
How's it going?
Hey, man.
Honestly don't know at this point.
That's okay, man.
It's gonna take a while.
Hey, got a stack of
bills you got there, bro.
Yeah.
I got enough to keep my phone on,
but I'm gonna have to take
out a mortgage on the rest.
What about the shop?
I had to close it.
The landlord was really cool though.
He didn't even trip that I
was in breach of my lease.
He took what I gave him
and he let me stay open.
Melissa was helping me
cover the utilities,
so we were good for a while.
You still got all your
equipment and your machines?
Right there.
Yeah.
Cool, man, that's great.
Why don't you start tattooing out here?
Really?
Yeah.
Might have to hit you up for
a little bit of ink though.
Um, deal.
- Sweet, it's awesome.
- Cool.
Oh, shit, Mandy.
Hey, Mandy.
- Hey.
What are you doing right now?
I'm just at the
apartment hanging with Tai.
What's going on?
[Mandy] I bought some trash bags.
I'm actually getting
ready to go do a cleanup
along the Pacific Coast Highway.
Do you wanna come with me?
I could use the help.
Um.
Yeah, under one condition.
[Mandy] Okay, what is it?
Hang on.
You wanna go me with and Mandy?
Yeah, it'd be cool.
Um, can use an extra
hand, Tai wants to help.
[Mandy] Of course.
Yeah, that would be great.
Okay.
You remember the address, right?
- Yeah.
- Okay, so just text me
when you're close.
[Mandy] Sounds like a plan.
Okay, bye.
[Mandy] Bye.
I'll be damned.
What is it?
It's nothing.
Melissa and I used to go up
the coast on the weekends
and pick up trash together too.
You'll be okay?
Yeah, I'm good.
(dramatic music)
Hey, man, I can't keep up with you now.
Come on, have pity on
the old man, alright?
- Whoa.
- Oh.
Holy shit, man, you trying
to give us a heart attack?
[Tai] Wow, man, that's quite a haul.
- No joke.
- Man, I can't believe
how much crap is on this coastline, bro.
- Well.
- Maybe, I can.
I really appreciate
you guys for helping.
- It's nothing.
- No, it's not nothing.
Can you imagine if everyone did this?
Shoot, you're preaching
to the choir, Mandy.
I'm running around my neighborhood,
and everybody thinks I'm nuts, man,
'cause I'm over there
with my little trash bag
picking up trash, and it's like nobody
freaking cares anymore, you know?
Well, I think it's
awesome that you do that.
So what inspired you to do this?
My sister.
She used to come up here on weekends
and just spend hours picking up trash.
How did you know that?
She always invited me.
She never told me that.
No.
Well, I never came.
I guess I was just too
self-absorbed at the time
to realize what she was trying to do.
She cared about life on so many levels,
and you know, so I wanna do this for her.
And because now, I see what's possible.
And she taught me that.
I just wish that I could tell her.
(indistinct chatter)
What?
I hate that shit.
Yeah, me too.
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
We'll go with you.
No, no, it's okay, I got it.
Are you sure?
I'm sure.
Okay, go.
(indistinct chatter)
You know, be a series regular.
- Hey, guys.
- Hi.
I'm sorry to bother you,
but can I ask you something?
Oh, sorry, we don't have spare change.
That's not what I was gonna ask you.
Okay, what is it?
Well, would you mind
picking up your trash
and taking it with you?
Excuse me?
Well, I couldn't help but notice
that you were wiping
the sand from your feet
with those tissues and then
just threw them on the ground
and also left your drinks in the sand.
Yeah. (Laughs)
Yeah?
So?
Well, it's nothing personal really,
but if you could just pick up
your trash and throw it away,
I'd really appreciate
it because it's just,
this is a really beautiful place,
and I'd hate to see it ruined.
Is this your property?
What do you mean?
I mean, this beach, those
houses, you own any of it?
Well, that's not the point.
We all share this planet.
We all breathe the same air.
The earth is our mother, not a trash can.
And she deserves our love and support
for the miracles that she gives us.
(both chuckling)
God.
Sir, please don't ignore me.
Listen, crazy girl.
I am not interested in
your opinions, okay?
So why don't you go back to Berkeley
or wherever it is that you picked up
those goddamn hippie cult
fucking woo-woo ideas
and mind your own goddamn business?
This is my business.
(gasps)
Yeah?
Take a fucking shower
and get a fucking job.
Don't play with ignorance,
it won't save you.
You know the truth like most people,
you just won't admit it.
You're a hypocrite.
But I bet you can hear the ticking sound.
I don't have time
for this bullshit, man.
- That's right. You don't.
Can you hear it now?
Can you hear it now?
Yes, sir.
The ticking in your chest.
Do you have time now to
witness my sister's conviction
with love and understanding?
Yes, sir, I'm very sorry.
Tell her that.
I'm very sorry if I offended you.
I don't believe you.
Tell her that, again.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
You see, life is precious, isn't it?
Isn't it?
Right?
I believe you.
I want you to do something for me.
Yeah?
Pick up your trash,
get in that thing you drive, and leave.
And don't come back.
Yeah.
And if you call the fucking cops,
I'm gonna find you and I'm
gonna take this pistol,
and I'm gonna shove it
fucking way up that big ass.
Okay?
- Okay.
Okay, go have a nice day.
Go ahead.
Get in the fucking car.
Get in the fucking car.
I guess she's pissed.
Yeah.
Have a nice day.
Hey, Mandy, you okay?
You son of a bitch!
Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
It's okay, brother, it's okay.
What the fuck was that all about?
What are you talking about?
Oh, come off it, tough guy.
You know what the hell I mean.
Mandy, chill out.
Everything here is happening
in harmony with what we believe.
You think my sister would support
or respect what you just did?
What's happening to you?
[Abby] Honey, when you get this,
I need you to come by the
condo as soon as possible.
It's really important.
I'll be here all day.
Love you.
Oh, what is it?
It's Jay and Linda.
- What happened?
- I got a call
from Linda's dad.
They were attacked.
[Mandy] Oh, my god.
Where?
Earlier today in brought daylight,
right in front of the condo.
Did anyone see who did it?
Did they catch them?
No, ho one saw anything.
Her dad said that Linda was screaming
when the cops showed up.
Jay was unconscious.
[Mandy] Oh, my God.
I feel horrible.
I know that she's a good friend of yours.
I feel responsible for this.
What?
Why?
I showed them the property,
and I feel like I could
have been more honest
about certain elements
of the neighborhood.
I didn't know it was gonna be a war zone,
and I feel like they
really love the place.
Abby, they did.
Linda loves the place and Venice,
and believe me, she was not
leaving without a fight.
(dramatic music)
Okay.
(dramatic music continues)
[Charles] Maybe I haven't done enough.
I might be ashamed of
that, for not doing enough.
For not giving enough.
For not being more perceptive.
For not being aware enough.
For not understanding.
For being stupid.
Maybe I should have killed 400-500 people,
then I would have felt better.
Then when I felt like I've
really offered society something.
You know, if I wanted to kill somebody,
I'd take this book and
beat you to death with it,
and I wouldn't feel a thing.
It'd be just like
walking to the drugstore.
I've learned to reflect.
I just reflect back.
I know I don't know.
I know I'm stupid.
I admit, I'm a pity, whatever.
I never been a success at anything.
I even got to the point
where I didn't want-
(dramatic music)
I remember what we
talked about in the van.
Our mission is one of non-violence.
And it makes me nervous
when you listen to that Manson interview.
I just feel like it affects
you in a negative way.
And I feel like a fucking coward
sitting in this corner doing nothing.
And I can't understand why
you don't feel the same way.
They were your friends.
Of course, I'm upset about
it just as much as you are.
But what are you gonna do about it?
It seems like nonviolence
only does so much,
and then you need somebody
like me to stand behind you.
I'm not gonna let hate
influence my thinking.
I'll be going to the hospital
just as soon as they say I can visit.
Love is the cure.
And I know that in your
heart, you know that.
(dramatic music)
Can you please give your knife?
(dramatic music)
Please?
And promise me that you'll
get rid of that gun.
You gotta promise me.
I promise you.
Do you guys want something to drink?
- Yes, please.
- Water?
Okay.
- Oh, actually, Tai,
can I talk to you for a second?
Sure.
I'm really worried he's
gonna try and do something
in retaliation because of Jay and Linda.
Can you just do me a favor
and like keep an eye out on him for me?
Listen, don't worry about it.
I'll talk to him.
He just needs a little time to breathe.
Hey, brother.
- Hey.
- Can I talk to you for a sec?
- Sure.
What's up?
Hey, listen.
I think tomorrow we should go
on a hike in Topanga Canyon.
I think it's good medicine for us,
and it gives us a chance
to clear our heads.
I don't know.
Mandy may want me to go with
her to the hospital tomorrow.
That's not a problem.
We'll go early,
and then we'll meet the
girls at the hospital.
Is that okay?
Yes.
- Sure, why not?
- Sweet.
- All right, you okay?
- Yeah, I'm okay.
(dramatic music)
Hey, Tai, you know what?
You were right.
This is what I needed.
It feels good to be outside today.
Yeah, I forgot how peaceful
life could seem in a place like this.
Always works for me.
Even here, they have to
leave proof of what they are.
I know it's frustrating, man.
But that's why I brought extra bags.
That way, we can have a great hike today.
With respect, brother,
do you think it'll make any difference
what we do at this point?
Los Angeles is gonna burn.
And I think it's a blessing.
Look, man, I know you've lost faith,
and I understand why.
But I battle the same demons that you do.
And how do you cope with
all the shit around this time?
Sometimes, I can't.
Sometimes, I'm like, "Fuck it, I'm done."
I just wanna go home and
eat a fucking bullet.
But here we are, one foot in
paradise, the other in hell.
It's kind of like when we
were in the war, Milles.
We had to fight then, you gotta fight now.
It doesn't have to make
fucking sense, all right?
You just gotta keep moving forward
and hope for something better.
I never considered that you
might have the same thoughts
running through your mind as me.
Yeah, I do.
So why don't we just keep walking,
and maybe we'll have better thoughts?
Okay.
(birds chirping)
I got this.
You sure?
Yeah.
Yeah, I got it.
Hey, man.
Do y'all mind doing that somewhere else?
There's a place down in Venice.
There's a wall.
A lot of graffiti artists go down there
and paint some murals.
There's a lot of great art down there.
Do I look like a graffiti artist to you?
What makes you think
I'm a graffiti artist?
- My bad, I just-
- What?
- I just-
- You just what?
I just thought, man.
Get the fuck out of here bro.
Come right here?
- Yeah.
Fuck you want, dog?
You think you can just touch me or what?
Yeah, go ahead.
Touch me again.
- Hey, I apologize.
- What?
I apologize.
I had no right to touch you, man.
Change your mind?
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
We'll just go, man.
- Yeah.
- Milles, let's go.
- Get the fuck out of here.
Milles, let's go.
Yeah, Milles, go.
Please give me a reason to shoot you dead.
No, not feeling it?
Did mortality suddenly
reveal something to you?
God, man, I was just
fucking around, bro.
Take his gun.
What's your name?
Jesus.
Jesus, I want you to
do something for me.
I want you to lay down on the
ground face first behind me,
with your arms stretched
out, kind of like Jesus.
Come on.
It's okay.
No?
Would you rather I just
shoot you in the face?
- No.
- Then get on the ground.
Come on.
Slow.
Bend your knees.
Let him go.
Keep your gun on this guy.
You believe in God?
Yeah.
Let's wait and see if God saves you.
Your friend isn't going
to, he just ran away.
Hey, loco, I'm sure
you're smart enough to know
that if you kill me,
you kill yourself too.
That's the plan, my brother.
So don't take this personal,
it's not about you.
You see the man pointing the gun at you?
Yeah.
Do you know how many people
him and I killed in Iraq?
No.
Too many.
(dramatic music)
(Jesus grunting)
[Melissa] We are afraid to choose love.
Don't let the chaos blind you.
It doesn't have to be about darkness.
[Mandy] Our mission
is one of nonviolence.
I would hate to hear
that you stepped outside
the law about this.
Don't get wrapped up in the hate, man.
But I battle the same
demons that you do.
One foot in paradise, the other in hell.
(Milles grunting)
(dramatic music)
(birds chirping)
Hey, man, snap out of it.
We gotta go, we gotta get
the fuck out of here, man.
Let's go.
Let's go, come on.
(dramatic music)
(sirens wailing)
(monitor beeping)
Hey, sunshine.
Hey little fireball.
Are you cold, you need a blanket?
Oh, easy, honey.
Don't fight it, just, here take my hand.
I killed him.
[Mandy] What?
No, no, please don't say that.
It wasn't your fault.
Yes, it is.
At least Jay is in a better place now.
No longer in this hell.
You have to leave this place.
It's a lie.
Don't let the lights deceive you.
It's a prison.
Oh, Milles.
Poor soul.
Help him.
Don't let him fall.
I won't.
I won't.
(indistinct chatter)
(dramatic music)
Help me, help me.
Milles.
No.
Fuck.
(dramatic music)
Yeah, hey Mandy, it's me.
I'm with Tai.
Can you please tell Abby to open the gate?
We're here.
You guys take the scenic route?
There was a crash on the freeway.
Got held up.
You know, I've been calling you.
I'm sorry, man, I didn't get the call.
You wanna tell me what happened?
We got jumped by some damn
thugs on the trail, okay?
I didn't ask you, Tai.
Is that what happened?
What happened?
Yeah, Tai, why don't you
tell them what happened?
A guy pulled a gun on us.
[Mandy] Where, on the trail?
Yeah, we were picking up trash.
And I look up, these guys are throwing
little gang signs on rocks
and spraying 'em up there
and he grabs the guy with the gun,
and all of a sudden, that guy fell.
This is crazy.
It's not your fault.
Really.
We love you unconditionally.
You know what I think?
I think you guys are
beautiful, all of you.
And if I could invent
a fantasy to live in,
it would be this one, with all of you.
But I don't deserve it.
Sorry.
Don't.
Listen to me.
I strangled that guy and watched him die.
He had a gun but he didn't pull it.
Tai would.
I'm no hero, Mandy.
I'm a murderer.
I made a promise to you, right?
And I broke it.
I don't deserve you, or any of this.
Let me go.
It doesn't matter.
Love is secure, remember?
And I love you.
You're coming with us.
I can't.
Don't you understand?
You guys would all end up
in prison because of me,
and I couldn't live with it.
I'm done.
What about Manson?
What about him?
What would he do?
I don't know what he would do.
But I know what he said.
When you take a life, you owe a life.
I gotta go.
Hey, man.
Don't leave without saying goodbye.
I'm sorry, man.
I just thought it'd be easier this way.
I appreciate what you said.
You almost made me believe it.
It's my circle, remember?
You saw what I did.
I know.
I know, man.
I love you, bro.
In this life or the next.
We'll find you.
I'm sorry.
Hey.
It's a long walk to Venice.
Thanks.
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
(birds chirping)
(helicopter whirring)
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
(dramatic music)
[Melissa] My darling man.
I thought you might like this book.
I know it's hard for you
to read this type of stuff.
I offer it not to change who you are,
because to me, you're perfect.
Only that you might see what
is possible without fear.
I love you and want so
much for you to find peace.
Always.
Melissa.
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
(Mandy screaming)
(dramatic music)
(dramatic music continues)
(indistinct chatter on radio)
You know they're coming for you, right?
Yeah.
I figured they would.
What now?
Well, did you notice the sun today,
shining down, nice and warm?
Cold breeze?
Yeah, I did.
Start with that.
Can't argue with perfection.
I'm gonna miss you, man.
I'll always be here for you.
When you're ready.
(knocking on door)
Milles.
It's Detective Anderson.
Face down, spread your
legs, arms, palms up.
I know you're in there, Milles.
I need you to do what I'm saying.
I'm asking you.
(loud thud)
You are not listening to me.
It's okay.
Milles, do not get up.
Get back down on the ground.
I need you to stay on
the ground, face down.
Please don't make this
hard on both of us, bro.
Milles, stand back.
You're not listening.
Stand the fuck back, I'm warning you.
Do not do what you're doing.
Baby!
(dramatic music)
(gunshots firing)
(dramatic music)
Is it that you recall
Being in harmony
Is there someone in you
That yearns to see
Or do you remember a
time when you were free
Could it be the real you
wants just to see
Did you ever wonder
what you're living for