B for Busy (2021) Movie Script

1
After all these years,
I didn't let myself fall apart.
I dared not to.
I never looked back.
Not that I needed to.
There was nothing I can't bear to part.
For the best is yet to come.
And today I found out
that it never will come.
Everything I think I know
about myself is wrong.
To me, life is but an illusion.
From now on, things will never get better.
Never ever.
All my life, like everyone else,
I've been waiting in line
for my share of honey.
It was a long line and my turn never came.
All my life, like everyone else,
I've been waiting in line
for my share of honey.
It was a long line and my turn never came.
Are you hungry?
Wanna go grab a bite somewhere?
I could use a few drinks.
Then let's go find a bar.
At your place.
My place is that way.
Can we go this way, though?
That'll do, too.
Alex, turn the volume down.
You've been playing this
song the whole morning.
Alexander.
Alex.
"All night long", come down for brunch.
Mr. B, Mr. B. Can I have a few more days?
Eat first.
Next week. I'll definitely
pay the rent next week.
I'll give you one month.
Come down and have breakfast.
Okey dokey.
[Why did you leave without saying goodbye?]
For me?
- Together? No?
- No.
[Just one night?]
What happened, Mr. B?
One night stand?
It means...
I know what it means. What one night stand?
[Off to work?]
Enjoy painting today.
I'll pick you up when I'm off work.
Xiao Zhang, Xiao Zhang.
Your dad is in no shape to paint.
Uncle, don't you patronize him.
My dad loves art. He
practices at home every day.
- Really? He does?
- Morning, Mr. B.
- There you are.
- How are you doing? Better?
I'll never do that again.
- I'll never do that again.
- See, he's delusional.
So are all great artists.
Mr. B's class is not a nursing home.
A nursing home would
be much more expensive.
Mr. B, make sure he takes
his medication at 11:00. Thank you.
Come back here.
Let him go. Xiao Zhang
is having a rough time.
- It's bad luck running into people like that.
- It's okay.
Come over here, enjoy your sunbath.
Alex.
- You're up early.
- I haven't slept, Lao Wu.
Good for you.
I see your taste has changed.
Into them cougars now, are we?
What?
Just like me when I was young.
She's Shanghainese, right? I can tell.
What are you talking about?
I saw it through the window.
She ran out early in the morning
in such a hurry.
Then she tripped and snapped
one of her high-heels.
Hey, Lao Wu, stop sticking your nose
where it doesn't belong.
Alex, take the plate and go eat upstairs.
Alex and I are like best buds.
We young people tell each other everything.
Best buds?
You pay his rent then.
These are some slutty shorts.
Except your legs are too skinny.
I'm telling you.
I'm telling you. Work out
your body but not your legs.
Sooner or later you'll regret it.
Go up there.
Time to work.
It's great.
Hey,
have you made a decision about
what we discussed the other day?
No way.
Your paintings are way
too fine and sophisticated
to be exhibited in
the Senior Citizens' Activity Center,
alongside tablecloths, slippers, and
TV covers woven by some old ladies.
It'd be humiliating.
I think it's cool.
It's like presenting your art to
the people, where it came from.
I actually found you a
place for an exhibition.
You're such an artist,
yet you don't hang out with your peers
or participate in exhibitions.
Working here as an art teacher,
don't you feel ashamed?
Not ashamed! Not ashamed!
Sit back down.
Listen to me. This is painting.
This is cooking.
This is drumming.
This is writing poetry.
And this is teaching.
Separated, they are meaningless.
Together, it's wholesome.
Every side represents
a different part of me.
I told you this a long time ago.
I'm versatile.
Artist or not,
this is your charisma.
Gloria, sure has that
gothic vibe going on today.
Go? Go what?
[Danse Macabre]
[HONEY: I've been waiting in line
for my share of honey.]
[It's finally my turn.]
[Then I find out they
don't sell honey here.]
Mr. B.
Gloria, what on earth are you painting?
Can't you tell?
It's too three-dimensional.
Paint another one.
Mr. B, are you nervous?
Why would I be nervous?
Where's that Taiwanese husband of yours?
I told you last time, he went missing.
Can't find him.
For a month? Did the
kidnappers call you for ransom?
Well, if they do then I'll
tell them to kill him.
Tear him into pieces.
Isn't your husband having an affair?
Even better. Then I can
have someone else too.
No one's getting any younger, am I right?
I see things clearly now.
This is my time to shine.
I'm rich and free, with my husband missing.
You can't ask for a better life.
That's true.
Why did you stop painting
and start chitchatting?
Lao Wu went to change his clothes.
Yes, Lao Wu's changing.
There he is.
Looking good.
Looking good.
Come on, sit down already.
Hurry.
[Slept well last night?]
[Uh huh.]
Nice muscles.
Great, huh?
You should lose those jeans.
Hey, A'de.
Mr. B, welcome back.
These are your size.
These too.
And I got one for your mom.
Thanks bro.
This isn't even your style.
Huh.
How much in total?
These fit foreigners better.
These fit me, too.
Don't you always wear polo shirts
like this? These are so comfortable.
This one sure is, 100% cotton.
It's a cheap knockoff for foreign tourists.
Give me a discount then.
Wait. You...
You're not taking the shorts?
I stocked those for you.
- You can wear them as summer outfits, too.
- I wear these now.
I'll take a pair of these,
and this.
You've started wearing sexy shorts?
Let me scan it.
Take all these shorts with you.
All of them?
They're all your size.
I can't sell them to anyone else.
This is too many.
- Hey, beautiful.
- Hi there, Mr. B.
Say, Mr. B, that tangerine peel bone broth
I had at your place,
I tried to cook it at home,
but it didn't taste right.
After the tangerine peel is boiled, you need
to scratch that white stuff off its surface.
And, before serving, add some vanilla
to bring out the flavor.
Got it, thanks.
Pro.
My love, all the discount
stuff is here, right?
All here.
I think this one expires in a week.
Well, they're just cooking ingredients
and you taught me this.
Add beer instead of water
when cooking pork stew.
So it comes out more fragrant.
This will make your hair extra smooth.
See how shiny it is?
Water your plants with the leftover beer
and the leaves will be super green.
Works like a charm.
I'm having someone over for a drink and you
guys turned it into a tip-sharing session.
Who are you having over? Is it a woman?
Women love fine wine.
Who says my guest is a woman?
I need something less strong.
It's so overpriced.
Hey, Yangyang.
How could you let a young
lady do such heavy labor?
Dad, leave it. It's her job.
Yangyang, I brought you some food.
Oh, thanks.
What is it?
This is for you.
Unpack it back home.
I got plenty of cleaning cloth here.
What cleaning cloth?
You can wear them as summer outfits.
Feel the summer breeze.
- No, thank you.
- 100% cotton. International brands.
Thank you, sir.
Americano?
Yeah, as usual.
Okay.
Hey, Yangyang,
have you seen this play?
My friend's in it. I can
get you some tickets.
I think I'll pass. You've seen it?
It's excruciatingly boring.
Wouldn't recommend it to anyone.
But one of my friends said it made her cry.
I think she needs a psychiatrist.
Don't say that.
The book is quite good, actually.
It's the adaptation that sucks.
Three people wandering about on stage
talking nonsense.
It's based on a book?
Not a lot of people know that.
Like many Chinese movies nowadays,
they never mention it's a remake
while promoting it, so you wouldn't know.
Which one are you talking about?
- The one we saw yesterday.
- Yesterday?
You don't remember?
Ouch.
Who are you talking about?
Some dumb-ass.
Did you get your eyebrows done?
They've always looked like this.
You don't think I know what
your eyebrows look like?
I just had some wild ones plucked.
Wild ones? As opposed to domestic eyebrows?
What kind of guy plucks his eyebrows?
I don't like them, so I plucked them.
Oh, you don't like them?
Even a young lady like her
doesn't pluck her eyebrows.
She's no lady. She's sloppier than you are.
How am I sloppy?
Don't tell me you also wear makeup.
I'm not.
Ew, what are you applying on your hands?
I wash hundreds of glasses every day,
so my skin cracks.
I've washed my hands for over 40 years
and I've never applied anything to them.
- You can have this.
- I don't want it.
I'm out of here.
Uncle.
Uncle.
- Okay, thanks.
- Pay up.
You already have all the shorts.
Yongkang Road, Apartment 185.
Apartment 185?
Got it, got it.
I never told you this.
- Of course.
- See you.
Thanks, Xiaoyun.
Great, you're home.
What are you doing here?
I'm just dropping by to give you something.
I saw you enjoyed that play.
This is the original novel.
It's better than the play.
Hey,
how did you know where I live?
Xiaoyun told me.
What else did she tell you?
That you're divorced and single.
Kid studying abroad.
And what did you tell her?
I said you're a wonderful woman.
Pretty, gentle, and fascinating.
- That's it?
- That's it.
It's signed by the author.
I forged it. Just scratch
it off if you don't like it.
Who is that? You hired an electrician?
He also brought you something.
Is he a friend?
Let's talk inside, come on up.
- Have you had dinner?
- Not yet.
Haven't cooked yet.
Here.
This is the one.
Careful.
Where's the pork stew I put in the fridge?
I threw it away.
Why did you do that?
I don't get it.
You're way too charitable
for someone who's not rich.
I'm telling you. Don't ever throw away food
that I put in the fridge.
You don't have to eat it.
I just made that pork stew the other day.
What a waste.
I've told you a million times.
Don't cook more than you can eat.
People get cancer from eating
too much leftover food.
It's not like I forced you to eat it.
As for getting cancer, our generation
ate leftover food all the time.
I've never heard of anyone
getting cancer from it.
You live under my roof and eat my food.
How can you be so ungrateful?
What do you mean I eat your food?
Did I not buy all the household stuff?
Did I not give you money? So picky.
Your money's nothing to brag about.
Wu Xiaoyun's husband bought a house
for his mother-in-law in Pudong.
And you?
Married that white trash,
then lost your two houses.
What have I done to deserve
a spoiled bastard like you?
It's the wire. I'll run out and get one.
Forget it. Leave it be. Let's talk inside.
Come on in.
Such a bitch. And you just
bring him in like that?
Why are you standing? Sit.
I think I'll just leave.
This seems like a bad time.
What's that supposed to mean?
You're gonna walk away after seeing a show?
That wasn't much of a show.
My mom called me worse.
It's not a competition.
Have a seat.
Why aren't you moving out of this house?
It's closer to my kid's school.
I thought your kid is abroad.
Here she is.
- Hey, sweetie, come over here.
- Not yet.
Have some chocolate.
Say hi to Mr. B.
- Hi, Mr. B.
- Hi.
What does he teach?
Art.
What grade?
Actually, he teaches grandpas,
grandmas, and aunties.
What grade are they in?
I'm going to hold an exhibition.
Really? I thought you
told me it's just for fun.
An exhibition is fun, too.
Don't just eat chocolate.
Have you studied English,
or done your homework?
Maya, you're a foreigner.
It'd be embarrassing
if you flunked English.
Go get your book, I'll
help you with dictation.
And no sleep until we're done.
- So, what's her non-Chinese half?
- British.
Doesn't her dad talk to her in English?
Don't even get me started on that scumbag.
How many words are we dictating today?
Your call.
Ten.
Get your pencil out.
You ready?
Calm.
As in "calm down".
Distance.
As in "keep distance".
Regret.
As in "I regret something."
You think I own a power plant or something?
Electricity costs money.
And you're flushing my
money down the toilet.
You wanna be my mom's boyfriend?
Your mom's my friend. Good friends.
Girlfriend, then.
How come you don't speak English?
I do.
Then why did you fail the exam?
I can speak, but not write.
The exam was too hard.
The exam was too hard?
It is kind of hard.
Are you done? Let me see.
All wrong.
They're all wrong, Maya.
Did you not use your brain?
I think I'll just leave.
Sure, you take care.
Maya, say goodbye to Mr. B.
Bye.
When is your exhibition and where?
The exhibition...
Soon. I'll text and let you know.
Great.
You know what?
When Xiaoyun was decorating her home,
she sent me all these pictures of
paintings, asking me to pick two for her.
And I picked yours in the blink of an eye.
Why?
I think your style fits her home perfectly.
What style is her home?
I'll help you put these away.
Sure, thank you.
Thank you so much.
Are these the high-heels
you had on last time?
I'll help you fix it.
- I can do it myself. Put it down.
- It's okay.
You... You're not taking the other one?
This one's not broken.
That's okay. I'll use it as a reference.
See ya.
This is the exhibition
place you got for me?
How am I going to hold an exhibition here?
This is the new trend.
It used to be a bubble tea place.
So, it's quite popular.
That was a long time ago.
Now it's just a pop-up store.
How many people can fit
in this shallow space?
Not many. That's why they
have to wait in line.
The bubble tea shop would
pay people to wait in line.
It's called "hunger marketing".
Wait in line? A very long line.
But when they find out it's an art
exhibition instead of bubble tea,
won't they get mad?
What are you talking about?
Size 37.
Beibei's?
We've been divorced for years.
Why would she want me to fix her shoes?
Whoever it is, Mr. B,
she's not right for you.
How do you figure?
Jimmy Choo.
Authentic. They cost over 10,000.
Think you can afford to date their owner?
These shoes cost 10,000?
Are you familiar with that famous quote?
I assumed it's from your dad again.
Not this time it isn't.
It's about Jimmy Choo.
What is the quote?
She's not that kind of woman.
She has been wearing these
for years to save money.
"Every woman should at least have
one pair of Jimmy Choo in their life time."
Every woman should at least have
one pair of Jimmy Choo in their life time.
What about men?
What could men possibly want?
We are not that gullible.
Nonsense. Men want more. We're dumber.
Alright, stop drinking coffee.
Fix the shoes already.
What time is it now? It's my coffee time.
- You do know that, don't you?
- Will your coffee taste like shoes?
- Wu Xiaoyun.
- Oh, Sister Yun.
- Hey sister, you have a visitor.
- Mr. B.
You're here.
I have it here.
Sorry for bothering you.
The artist hand-double we
hired couldn't make it.
So, I figured, you're an artist.
And you don't have much to do.
That's true. I don't.
Who's in charge of this?
Now you're apologizing to me?
How am I gonna tell the director?
What are we going to tell the client?
- How much longer?
- 35 minutes.
- 35 minutes.
- 35 minutes?
Sooner!
Mr. B, what brings you here?
He's the hand-double now.
I told you to get a student from the art
school. Why would you go and bother Mr. B?
- He doesn't have much to do.
- It's okay. I'm free.
Only my hands will be in the shot, right?
Do I need to change?
- Really? You can help us with it?
- Of course.
Let me double check with the director then.
Are you sure you're not filming my face?
The actor who plays the
artist looks too good.
He doesn't seem like an artist.
Nor do you look like a poet.
I'm not a poet. I just
like to talk in segments.
Mr. B, sorry for today.
Here's something to eat.
You're being too kind.
You should buy Mr. B a
fancy dinner next time.
I give you my word.
I ate boxed meals every day
when I worked at that TV network.
Did you?
- Now if you'll excuse me.
- Thank you.
You used to have a job?
I thought you just collected
rent for the houses.
You even know how many houses I have?
Xiaoyun told me.
I used to teach art at
an elementary school.
In '98, I became a stage
designer for this TV network.
That was the year I started college.
What college?
A crappy one.
I almost made it into Tongji University,
just three points below the line.
Then I wanted to study abroad.
Again, almost got myself into NYU.
Where did you end up then?
Nowhere. I stayed in Shanghai
and worked in advertising.
I decided to take a different path
since I couldn't have the best.
And is that new path a smooth ride?
Well, going downhill is
always a smooth ride.
Maybe we can go mountain climbing some day.
I fixed your high-heels.
So when should I bring them over?
That'd be great.
Okay then. When and where?
4:00.
Taiyuan Road, what number?
Cool, got it.
Mr. B.
Mr. B.
Since when did you have a kid?
He didn't.
Let's go inside and do your homework.
Maya, where's your dad?
How often do you see each other?
You are not close with my mom.
How am I not close with your mom?
Why else would she let me look after you?
Then tell me, how old is she?
Alright. Here's something
I'd like to teach you.
It'll be useful when you grow up.
A real gentleman would
never guess a lady's age.
And if the lady asked him to guess,
he'd say a younger age.
That's why I say your
mom is only 40 years old.
She's 38.
When will your mom send you to Britain?
"Back", because I'm British,
so it'd be "send me back to Britain."
Will your mom go back with you?
Not "back" for her, "to".
Because she's Chinese.
Use this attention to detail on your English
and you wouldn't have failed the exam.
Forget the exam. My English will get better
once I'm back home.
And I'll be a British girl
who speaks the most fluent Mandarin.
Do you want to go back?
Why not?
I don't like Britain.
You don't like your dad?
What else do you want to eat?
No? How about we do some homework then?
Carry on.
Jesus, Maya, keep doing
this and you'll go blind.
I can't do it while you're watching.
Fine, I'll make myself disappear.
- Lao Wu.
- Lao Wu's here.
Peter, Lagavulin.
You can't park your bike here. Move it.
I always park it here.
I'll be here too. Just one coffee.
Still no. Get it out of here.
The owner told me to park here. I've been
coming to this coffee house for ten years.
And I always parked here.
Who's in charge here? The owner or me?
I say you can't and you can't. Move it.
- I'll call for backup if you don't.
- Don't waste your time with him.
I will be back soon.
We're doomed.
This place gets more boring every day.
Less and less humane.
Nitpickers like him run everything.
He's just doing his job.
It's like they're the
master and we're the guests.
What master?
Two or three generations earlier,
everyone from out of town were guests.
Anyway, I don't feel welcomed here anymore.
You'll feel welcomed in Europe.
Your lady Sophia Loren
will welcome you, too.
Mark my words. I'll go back once I'm done
with my business here. Back to Europe.
How old is Sophia Loren now? 90 something?
She's 85.
Even made a film last year.
Directed by her son.
It's called "La Vita Davanti a S."
She played Madame Rosa.
It's based on a novel
by the French writer, Romain Rolland.
There was a French film
before, so it's a remake.
And it got an Oscar for
Best Foreign Language Film.
She told you all this?
I read it on the internet.
Does she still remember you?
Nonsense. She can never forget me.
You'd better believe that.
Whatever makes you happy.
I'm trying to help and you won't let me.
The place you found just won't do.
I found you another one.
This time it's the real deal.
My German girlfriend owns it.
No more hesitation.
Who said you can park your bike there?
- You can't. Move it.
- Fine, I'm leaving.
Can't stay here any longer.
Not for another minute.
It's okay. I'll pay.
Maya, do your homework.
Maya.
Thank you, Mr. B.
She has done her homework.
She got to Reading Comprehension on her
paper, but hasn't written the essay yet.
And I've checked the parts
she's finished so far.
Sorry for the trouble.
You are so considerate for a man.
- Don't mention it.
- Maya, come, let's go home.
I forgot your heels.
That's fine.
I'll go pick them up at your place tonight.
Maya, hurry, we're leaving.
Say goodbye to Mr. B.
Give Mr. B his phone.
Let's go. Say goodbye to Mr. B.
- Bye.
- Bye.
Check, please.
What are you doing here?
- Have you had dinner yet?
- Nope, dinner's ready at home.
I'll walk you out then.
What's in your hand?
Mom.
Alex, where's the detergent?
Mr. B, where is the toilet paper?
Mr. B.
Where's the shampoo?
For me?
Thank you.
I'm coming.
Mr. B, Mr. B.
Mr. B, Mr. B.
Easy, easy.
I'll close the door.
It's killing me.
I see you've brought your silvers.
Didn't eat, did you?
I had no appetite.
Mr. B, it's all your fault actually.
You had to make that stupid
joke and now it came true.
What joke?
I don't know who to talk to
about such an embarrassing family thing,
so I'm telling you.
But, Mr. B, you can't tell anyone else.
What family thing?
That loser husband of mine
has been missing for over a month, right?
You know me. I couldn't care less.
A while ago he called me,
using a burner phone that can't be traced.
He said he had this big plan
and that I shouldn't look down upon him.
And I was like, "Please."
You didn't know, Mr. B, but he's been
unemployed ever since we got married.
Any business he got into, big or small,
only lost money.
I gave up on him a long time ago.
To be honest, he was kind of cute
and two years younger than me.
But now he's 40, right?
Can't we just live a normal life?
Eh, Gloria...
Two months ago,
this guy he went to high school with
asked him to go back to Taiwan.
Something huge, he said.
Supposedly they'd go to Turkey, driving
trucks for this company to eastern Europe.
What company I did not know.
He was all mysterious about it.
I didn't care to ask anyway.
Just now he called me.
Again, using a burner phone.
I picked up and he
yelled, "Honey, save me!"
And I said, "Why should I even bother
to save your pathetic life?"
He was like, "Honey, save me please."
And Mr. B, guess what?
Before he could finish,
someone took his phone.
A man with a Taiwanese accent, talking
slowly, said that he had my husband.
Coming.
Oops, Mr. B,
you're expecting someone?
This is Gloria, my student.
I'm her art teacher.
- This is Ms. Li.
- Ms. Li, is it?
Come on in, don't stand there.
Come in, make yourself at home.
I'll go make you some tea.
Do you prefer black or green?
Come on now, you're my guest too.
I can't let you serve tea.
Mr. B, please, you and
I are closer than this.
I'll go wash the fruits then.
Sit down. Make yourself at home.
Sit, please.
Is Maya asleep?
What else would she be doing at this hour?
- I didn't know she'd be here.
- Mr. B, here. Fruits are ready.
Excuse me, let me put the fruits down.
Make yourself at home.
Look at that, you've
already reset the table.
I'm sorry about before.
Were you crying?
It has nothing to do with me.
Her...
Can I tell her?
Her husband was kidnapped.
You should call the police.
How come I didn't think of that?
We can call the police.
No police. He kept telling me that.
Also, he's in Turkey now.
You know, Mr. B?
The country's located
between Europe and Asia.
Plus, my husband is Taiwanese.
What could the Shanghai police possibly do?
Contact the embassy then.
The Turkish embassy is on West
Zhongshan Road, not far from here.
Informing the embassy is basically the same as
calling the police. What if they killed him?
I stopped loving my husband,
or caring for him, a long time ago.
However, he's still a human being.
I can't just let him die
in a foreign country.
That's too harsh.
How much money did they ask for?
25,000
Euros?
RMB.
Well, that's not much.
A flight to Turkey from
Shanghai costs about 10,000.
You should make the transfer.
I don't think so. What if they take
the money then ask me for more?
It could go on forever, Mr. B.
That's why you should call the police.
Oh really!
- Where did you meet him?
- Somewhere in...
Hi, gorgeous.
Hi, Alex.
Let's go upstairs, yeah?
- Are they all your roommates?
- Just the old guy.
Interesting.
- And this is...?
- That's Alex. From Italy.
He's a tenant here, and claims to
be a talking head on this show.
I don't know what that means.
Does he live in the penthouse
or the flat on the second floor?
You've been here before?
All the old houses are like this.
What are you doing here?
Tell your mom to stop bringing me things.
She did it again?
And all the stuff she gives me
is hand-me-downs from you.
What, does she think I'm a beggar?
No wonder I can't find anything.
I've talked to her about
it a thousand times.
You don't have to come all the way.
Just go home and have a good rest.
You have some dark
circles around your eyes.
I've been saying this for 20 years.
Those are my lying silkworms.
You must be Beibei. Come sit down
and I'll make you some tea.
- Are you hosting a women's conference here?
- Discussing some serious matters.
Jesus Christ... How boisterous!
I can smell the heat from a mile away.
What, are you having a party?
Beibei.
Haven't seen you in a while.
Come on, take this.
Gloria, you look gorgeous today.
- As always.
- Stunning. Gorgeous.
And who is this young lady I've never met?
Ms. Li. She's Wu Xiaoyun's colleague.
- I see. Hi.
- Hello.
Hey, why don't you introduce me?
Lao Wu.
China-EU trade representative.
Also general agent for a French company.
I work for a French company, too.
Commercial producer.
This beautiful lady looks familiar.
Every beautiful lady looks familiar to you.
Wow, you understood that?
I'm just a divorced woman from the past.
I have no business here.
- I'm leaving.
- Don't go. Why do you have to leave?
Everyone here is divorced.
This is a party for divorced people.
- That's enough.
- Come on, she has things to do.
Well, since Lao Wu asked,
I might as well stay.
It's not like I have anything better to do.
Yeah. Stay and drink with us.
Come sit down.
Lao Wu talks about you all the time.
Beibei, the ex-wife. What a knockout.
Why would Lao Wu talk about me?
I'm not his ex-wife.
I wish that were true. Too
bad I'm not that lucky.
Ex-wife's already past tense,
but you can make her your fianc.
Why are you guys making fun of me?
You're too old to be smoking this.
- How so?
- Let her relax, right?
- Yeah.
- What's wrong with that?
Come on, let's drink.
I heard you're having an exhibition?
Even elementary school art teachers can hold
exhibitions now. I see they have no standards.
Beibei, you're obviously biased.
You don't know what you're talking about.
Yeah. Mr. B is way more talented than those
old crooks in the Artists' Association.
He just doesn't know how to market himself.
Otherwise he'd be selling paintings in
Europe, instead of drinking with us here.
If you're going to have this exhibition,
please don't show the ones you did of me.
Don't flatter yourself.
I got rid of those a long time ago.
B, I see you're dressed differently today.
Trying to look virginal, are we?
Trying to look virginal at this age?
Have you no shame?
Mr. B is in such good shape.
About as fit as Alex.
What shape? I'm all chubby.
- Mr. B, do you work out?
- At best, I cook.
To be honest, he was busy
cooking for me all these years.
I appreciate that.
Hence the nickname, Mr. Busy for Nothing.
Not anymore. I'm Mr. Busy
for Something now.
These sweet lotus roots are amazing.
And this sweet fermented
rice soup looks great, too.
The sweet lotus roots
aren't even his expertise.
It's crucian and tofu soup.
Some people use soy milk to make the
soup creamy, but he added nothing.
Just fish, tofu, and some side ingredients.
And the soup came out super creamy.
Fish soup is so nutritious. That's why
everyone always tells me I have great skin.
I have fish soup all the time, too.
It's too nutritious, to the extent
that I almost produced breast milk.
That's gross. Stop talking, you.
That's it, I'm not making another soup.
I'm done.
Like a footballer retiring his boots,
I'm retiring my wok.
No, you can't. I haven't tried it yet.
That's right, Mr. B.
I haven't tried the soup, either.
And even Lao Wu has.
During the ten years or so when we
were married, nobody ever wanted Mr. B.
Now that we're not together, he's a catch.
No way. It's the cooking
that's popular, not the cook.
That's not true. Only a
good chef matters to me.
However, I thought this was going to be
a private dinner. And now it's a banquet.
That's right. First come, first served.
People should take a number and wait in line.
Someone cut in, you mean?
Only street cats would fight
over some leftover food.
- Who are you calling street cats?
- Who are you calling leftover food?
Whatever it is, we're here to eat.
Customer is God and Gods
don't fight over food.
Leftover food.
- I never fight people for food.
- It tastes better if you fought for it.
That's enough out of you.
I wouldn't mind being a street cat.
I can go wherever I want and do whatever
I like, without a care in the world.
I've had my share of fancy dinners, so
what's wrong with trying some leftover food?
After I'm done, I'll just wipe my mouth,
take off, and never look back.
- Gloria, do you have children?
- Nope.
A woman's life isn't complete
until she has children.
Bullshit. I can make up
quotes like that in a second.
A woman's life isn't complete
until she has dumped a hundred men.
A woman's life isn't complete
until she has made a million bucks.
No woman is complete
without living her life for herself.
A woman's life isn't complete
until she has traveled the world.
That's right! Cheers!
That's outrageous. They
are rebelling against us.
A woman's life isn't complete
until she has rebelled.
I say let's indulge ourselves.
- I'll go get the chopsticks.
- Hurry.
Any other hot dish?
Maybe we can have a crucian soup.
Can we or can we not?
Lao Wu has crucian at his place.
No crucian, no crucian.
It took me quite some time and effort
to get all this stuff here.
Let's try some prosciutto and salami first.
B's so lightheaded today.
Tell him to fish one in the river.
- Yeah, let him.
- Where is the river?
Mr. B, come down, breakfast is ready.
B.
Come have some breakfast.
Hurry, it's getting cold.
Morning, stranger.
Yum yum.
Morning, Mr. B. Wonderful night.
Mr. B, I get it. Never use another
person's kitchen without their permission.
So, I ran out early and bought all this.
Come here.
- Where are the others?
- You don't remember anything at all?
Lao Wu called cabs for everyone.
And you?
Well, I'm here, ain't I?
Alex, go have your breakfast upstairs.
Go. Do you hear me?
I'm gonna need you to pay your rent today.
Hurry.
Yum yum.
Mr. B, it's getting cold. Eat already.
Ouch.
What? Did your arm go numb from cuddling?
Last night...
Don't worry.
I'm not gonna tell anyone.
Easy.
Last night, the two of us...
- did nothing, right?
- You don't remember a thing?
I wouldn't have...
Please, Mr. B.
You know me. I never make the first move.
Say, Mr. B, what's the
price for your paintings?
From hundreds to thousands.
You are that cheap?
Uh huh.
- All of them are for sale?
- Uh huh.
I'll take this one with the glass.
The three plates are exquisite.
I'll have this. Let me pay you.
- You can have it if you want.
- No way.
I may not respect the artist,
but I do respect the art.
Just take it.
Plus, last night, I...
What happened last night
is exactly why I'm paying.
Transferred.
I'll take this with me then.
No rush. Let me have it mounted first.
That's right.
Somethings you just can't rush.
I have some errands to
run, so I'll take off now.
Yeah, sure.
And I won't be coming to art class today.
Of course.
Don't forget to collect your money.
That won't be necessary, really.
Holy... this is too much.
You're worth every penny.
- I'm not worth it.
- You definitely do.
Just take a look.
Look at Mr. B,
then look at yourself.
What's the use of working out, huh?
- If you don't take advantage of that.
- Absolutely.
I felt like I was bought.
No. Not really.
The money is for the painting.
That's another way to look at it.
This money really is for the painting.
Who would pay me for sex?
Hey, don't look down on yourself.
Yeah, Mr. B. You're just like me.
They may call us players,
but what they don't get is
that we also enjoy being played.
There's no "we". It's just you.
You don't have to make a
beautiful friendship dirty.
Good lord. You call this friendship?
You two slept together, then the next
day you act like nothing happened.
What kind of friendship is that?
She called herself a street cat
who wipes her mouth after finishing a meal
then takes off. She said so herself.
You know nothing about women.
They say one thing,
but are actually thinking the opposite.
Yeah.
Should I take this money then?
If I were you, I wouldn't take it.
You know how many women
spent money on me back in the day?
Bought me houses and cars.
I couldn't take it, I'm telling you.
I've got a bit of machismo.
I don't want my women to behave like that.
Women can get addicted
spending money on men.
You know how many women in the world
went broke spending money on men?
Not Shanghai women.
Wrong.
Even if they don't spend money on you,
they'd do it with another man.
If women release their power,
even the three of us combined
wouldn't stand a chance.
Alex, have you seen a pair
of high-heels around here?
No.
Why did you pick this place?
You asked me where I was and I said here.
Why? Should I find another place for you?
Since when did you learn to tango?
A woman's life isn't complete
until she has tangoed.
You're a fast learner
when it comes to this.
Why don't you go square dancing?
It'd be easier to find a partner.
You never get me.
How?
You always love this pretentious stuff.
That's a little uncalled for.
See that girl there?
The one in the yellow dress?
You think she's pretty enough for our son?
No way.
Did my mom give you a pair of high-heels?
I threw them away.
Why should I keep
something that's not mine?
For appreciation?
I gave the shampoo back
because you can still use it.
As for the high-heels,
I don't suppose you have any use for them.
How could you throw other people's
stuff away without even asking?
She gave them to me, so they are my stuff.
And I can do whatever I want with them.
How could you?
What?
Go talk to your mom.
What's the use of talking to me?
I can't reason with my mom.
That poor woman just can't seem
to let me go. What can I do?
I never told my mom why we got divorced.
Why didn't you say that a woman's life isn't
complete until she has done something wrong?
What's wrong with having an affair?
How many times do you have to repeat it?
I just did something that
every man in the world could have done.
So a man can be forgiven for cheating,
but I did it once and you divorced me?
How could you be so heartless?
I'm a woman of principle.
I may play games, but
family always comes first.
Name one thing that disproved my words.
You did cook for me.
But you enjoyed doing that.
And it's not like I haven't done things
to make you happy.
Don't you remember any of it?
I do and I'm not saying I wasn't happy.
I'll go talk to your mom,
ask her to stop bringing me stuff.
Thank you.
Now what? You can only buy a new pair.
The real ones cost over 10,000.
Close to 20.
You can get a pair of cheap knockoffs.
Most people can't tell the difference.
- How much would those cost?
- It depends.
The good ones are 5 to 6,000.
And the bad ones, 5 to 600.
That's a huge difference.
Profitable business.
It goes for all things women love.
It's not an issue of whether I can
afford it, but whether it's worth it.
Mr. B, what we have here is
a profound philosophical argument.
In this world, it's never about
whether we think something's worth it.
The only question is
whether we like it or not.
You can't run away from the truth.
It makes too much sense.
Gloria, I've had your painting mounted.
Where are you now? I'll bring it to you.
[Shanghai to Istanbul]
[Gloria: I'm at Nanjing Road
580, Room 888, hurry up.]
Life is long
There's only so much
I can give
I want just one night of your life
Believe in me if you
don't believe in love
Never said you love me
even if you can't get enough of me
Do you think I'm that fragile
I want just one night of your life
My head is confused
and my vows are blunt
The long night may end
and another day may come
I only want so much from you
Come on.
Have some drinks.
Why haven't you taken the money?
It's a gift.
I'll give you more.
Please don't.
Actually, I came to ask you
if there's anything I can do for you.
What do you mean?
I'm thinking, maybe I can get a flight
to Turkey and bring your husband back.
What are you talking about?
I did have too much to drink the other night,
but I can't just pretend like nothing happened.
I still want to be your friend.
Mr. B, you're scaring me. What do you want?
Nothing.
You're overreacting, Mr. B.
Does it need to be this serious?
If you don't want me to go
to Turkey, then forget it.
Jeez, don't even mention my husband.
Compared to you, he's a total loser.
Sitting around doing nothing.
Can't even keep a job driving trucks.
And he works for this illegal organization
that deals arms.
Even those warmongers won't have him.
All the money they asked for
is to make up what he's spent.
What kidnapping? That company
can't afford to keep him anymore.
Good to know that he's alive.
Come on, let's sing and drink some more.
I'm done singing and drinking.
I think I'll just go.
Say goodbye to Mr. B.
Goodbye, Mr. B.
Let me walk you out.
Mr. B,
you are truly a nice guy.
But women never love a
man because he's nice.
I'm not.
Mr. B, I'm dangerous.
Don't fall in love with me.
I know. I know.
- Maya, are you hungry?
- Yeah.
- Want to eat something?
- Yeah.
- Sweet or salty?
- Sweet.
Sweet, eh?
What sweet things should we eat?
How about I make you a rice cake with ribs?
Hey, Yangyang.
Uncle.
You're selling juice instead of coffee now?
My friend owns this place. I'm just
watching it for him for a few days.
She's my friend's daughter.
I'm just babysitting her for the day.
Not any friend. He wants to be with my mom.
Then your mom must be a real beauty.
A lot of guys are aftering her.
Hi, can I have a strawberry matcha?
Who's been chasing your mom?
There's this guy on her
WeChat called Bigshot Lawyer.
And another one called The Great Beyond.
Have you been peeking at your mom's phone?
Nah, I saw it by accident
while playing games.
- Have you seen those guys then?
- Nope.
You're the only one delivering yourself
to our door, so I've only seen you.
I wasn't delivering myself.
Then what is it?
It's called visiting. I visited your house.
How do you even know they're pursuing
your mom? They could be her friends.
What are you drinking?
Coconut.
Yangyang, get the kid a coconut.
Mr. B, I'll let you in on a secret,
but you can't tell my mom.
What secret?
My mom is actually 44.
Then why did you say she's 38?
She told me to say that to everyone.
Go play.
Sir, what flavor would you like?
Oh, me?
Starry Oatmeal Blueberry.
Are you going back to Bai Ge's?
No. I unfriended him.
Did he bully you or something?
He's too weak to bully anyone.
He's just such a mama's boy.
He does everything his mom tells him to.
That I can understand. He takes after me.
He never cares enough to fight back,
so people just push him around.
It's not that he doesn't care.
He's a coward.
A wimp. He's just so weak.
His mom still tries to
set him up with girls.
He didn't even have the guts
to tell her that we're together.
What do you see in him then?
If I were a woman,
I wouldn't even look at him twice.
You don't get it. He's
quite charming, actually.
But he said that his mom doesn't like me.
How could his mom not like you?
She said you Shanghainese
can't have Northern food.
Lying. She used to cheat
on a Northerner herself.
So, it was you who filed for divorce?
It's all in the past. We
are still friends now.
In fact, his mom is a good person.
She just doesn't know you that well.
Once she gets to know you,
I'm sure she'll like you.
Mr. B.
I'm sorry.
She fell asleep.
Sweetie, wake up. Put on your shoes.
She's done her homework.
Just let her sleep some more.
It's okay. It's late.
Sweetheart.
Let's go upstairs and smoke
a cigarette on the balcony.
Oh.
When I saw this painting the other night,
it made me sad.
Why?
When I was young, I
liked this kind of stuff.
And now?
What do you think?
You can still like them now.
Alex is leaving.
Going back to Yiwu.
Isn't he Italian?
He is an Italian citizen,
but his family runs a business in Yiwu.
And now he's going back to
inherit the family business.
He has a family business?
Selling fridge magnets.
So, now his room is vacant.
There's another one on the second floor,
with a bathroom.
I'm thinking maybe you guys can take it.
My house is also close to Maya's school.
You don't have to stay
with your mom anymore.
And don't worry about the rent.
I didn't take any money from Alex, either.
It's no rush, just think about it.
Miss, I'm gonna tell you something,
but you can't tell my mom.
Actually, I don't like girls.
Really. My mom doesn't know.
I don't want to upset her with
something like this. That's why I came.
Yeah. I can prove it.
Hey, check this out.
Boys don't put on makeup like he does,
with brow pencil, eyeliner, and shades.
He's even wearing lip balm.
But please don't tell his mom.
She'll go crazy if she finds out.
You two are making fun of me.
What is this?
What are you doing here?
Uncle Lao Wu invited me.
You don't have to come if
you hate arranged dates.
Tell that to your ex-wife.
What am I supposed to do?
You can pay for it.
Already did.
Thanks, Uncle. You're the best.
- I'm out of here.
- Sure.
Bai Ge is like me when I was his age,
changing girlfriends so fast.
Like lightning.
You remember the "United
Nations" of my girlfriends?
A Russian girl, a German
one, and one from Croatia.
This girl is better than Yangyang.
She's dreamy.
What's wrong with Yangyang?
She's not bad, except she looks like a boy.
You dumb-ass. That's the latest trend.
Now, look around.
Is this place fantastic or what?
It belongs to my German girlfriend.
If we are to have the exhibition here,
the chairs would need to be put away.
- How will people eat then?
- People will eat?
Of course. This is a restaurant.
How are they supposed to do business
without tables and chairs?
Forget it, this won't work.
This is an authentic art party. Right?
Invite all your friends.
We can drink while appreciating art.
Let me think.
I have to go take care of something.
Don't you walk out on me.
You are a pain in the ass.
Watch it.
- Maya.
- Bye, Miss.
Maya.
- Maya.
- Who is that? Why are you ignoring him?
That's Adam. My best friend.
You guys had a fight?
No.
What is this?
Mr. B, if I have Adam,
but I like Dannis from the class next door,
what do you call that in Chinese?
I think it's called betrayal.
Then I think I betrayed a friend.
Oh, no, I was wrong.
This is nothing.
- See ya, Uncle.
- See ya.
- Alex, noodles are ready.
- Alright.
Nice.
Mr. B.
I'm here.
What the hell are you doing?
Are you trying to piss me off?
What have you done to yourself?
You look like a wild animal.
Put it down.
It's okay.
Come here, let's wash it off.
I told you, when buying clothes,
you should pick a dark color.
So when you get it dirty it won't show.
And you had to pick a white one.
Now I can't get it off. It's a mess.
It will be fine.
Let me turn it into something beautiful.
Go take a seat inside. I'll cook.
Don't bother, Mr. B.
Picking up the kid is enough trouble
for you. We're not having dinner here.
Wait. It'll just be a simple meal.
I cook every day.
And it's not like Maya can eat that much.
She has this English class
and we're running late.
Class is more important.
- I'll pack up some snacks for you then.
- You don't need to. Mr. B.
We're leaving now.
Sorry. Things are crazy at home lately
and I couldn't find your shoes.
- I'll buy you a new pair.
- I'm glad you couldn't find them.
I've worn those for years and
was thinking about getting rid of them.
- Please, I have to make it up to you.
- Listen, Mr. B.
You should learn to just let things go.
Like the Buddhist idea of giving up
one's earthly possessions. Right, Mr. B?
We're leaving.
Let's go, Maya.
Her backpack.
Maya, go play in the yard.
Mommy will be with you in a minute.
Go.
Give up your earthly possessions. Why?
'Cause they won't work.
What do you mean?
A pair of shoes is only supposed to
be worn for a certain period of time.
The place I'm going,
these shoes won't work.
Where are you going? Don't
go if it's too challenging.
I'm not getting any younger and retracing
one's steps might not be a good idea.
I think you're still young. And you
shouldn't fill your head with crazy ideas.
These are Jimmy Choo shoes.
It's a luxury brand.
I must pay for your loss.
No, Mr. B.
I bought them on Taobao, only cost me 200.
I couldn't care less.
Goodbye. We have to leave.
Let's go, Maya. Say goodbye to Mr. B.
- About you guys moving in here...
- We don't have time.
Hurry, Maya. We'll be late.
Let's get going.
Come on. Hurry up, we're running late.
Have you eaten?
I just cooked some pork stew.
And stir-fried bamboo shoots.
I put the vegetables and
shrimp in the fridge.
Keep those for yourself. Don't bring
them to me or come here taking my stuff.
Especially when I'm not home.
Don't come over and take my things.
You hear me? Beibei doesn't need them.
Who said I gave her anything?
I wanted them for myself, okay?
Then what did you do with the high-heels?
I thought she left those.
We have been divorced for years.
You can still get back together.
Impossible. Don't even think about it.
It is absolutely out of the question.
Take this card. You can
buy whatever you want.
Just don't come here and take my stuff.
Are you seeing another woman?
It's none of your business. Leave me alone.
Raising someone else's child.
She is still so little. You don't
have the energy or the money for it.
Enough with the crazy talk.
I saw it. You put clothes on her.
Does your boy know? Does Beibei?
Raising another person's kid
while your own son is still a child.
So what? I got plenty of energy.
You really are Mr. Busy for Nothing.
You know that?
Take it all away.
Wait.
Take this, too.
- It's new, right?
- Yeah, you can give it to whoever you want.
Idiot.
Ma'am, will you stop taking my shampoo?
The one with English words on it is mine.
Who took your shampoo?
Keep your stuff in your own room.
My shoemaker pal.
- My shoemaker pal.
- Who is it? What?
You know something?
You're getting old and your vision is
compromised. You were wrong about those shoes.
The Jimmy Choo ones I showed you last time,
you said they were authentic
and worth over 10,000,
while in fact they are fake.
Cost about 200 on Taobao.
What are you talking about?
Breathe slowly. Come on, sit down.
Do you remember those high-heels?
Who told you they cost 200?
The lady herself.
What's the matter with her?
Who do you think I am?
I'm from a family of show makers.
- Family of show makers.
- You crack me up.
I'm from a family of shoemakers.
Three generations, and this
is about our reputation.
Listen to me, I'm not even shitting you.
Even if I were blind, I could still
tell real shoes from fake ones.
- 200, what a joke.
- It's over now.
Your family's reputation
is effectively ruined.
Fine, I won't trust you
on anything ever again.
Don't leave just yet. Come sit down.
It's not that simple.
So, did she know that you lost her shoes?
She did.
And she told you they were from Taobao
and only cost 200.
Mr. B.
Finally, you're right about something.
And I was wrong.
- What do you mean?
- Not about the shoes,
but the woman.
She's a good one. A keeper.
Think about it.
Why would she say they're
fake if they're real?
Maybe she doesn't want
to get real with you.
Impossible. I can tell
when someone's faking it.
She was just sending you a signal.
She doesn't want to owe you anything.
You must have been pressuring her.
I was just offering her a room rent-free.
- What was that?
- Offering her a room rent-free.
You're doomed then.
What were you thinking?
Like what Neil Armstrong said.
That was one small step for you,
but a giant leap in relationships.
I would've been terrified
too if I were a woman.
I didn't even think of that. She is
living with her mother and life is a mess.
That's the problem with men.
We think too little,
whereas women think too much.
Why didn't you find yourself a woman
if you're such an expert.
Because I know them too well.
That's why I chose to be alone.
Have you heard that famous saying?
I have and I know.
Way to be modest, man.
Alright.
I made a deal. Everything's taken care of.
This time you'll definitely be satisfied.
Walk around. Have a look.
This place, this is where
all the paintings would be.
Here and here.
And also there.
You can put the paintings on this wall.
Come on, I'm telling
you it's not gonna work.
Why won't it work?
You're out of your mind.
I think those two women screwed you up bad.
It was you who picked the wrong place.
How is it their fault?
It is their fault.
What's the deal with that Gloria?
A lonely old hag. Now you can't
get rid of her even if you try.
And that Ms. Li? She has seen the world.
And you know what?
Even if she ripped off all your money, it still
wouldn't be enough to get her daughter to Britain.
Yet you keep dreaming. I have no idea
what's going on in that dumb head of yours.
And what's the matter with Shanghai women?
They're simply not worth it.
Will you shut up? You know nothing about
them. What the hell are you talking about?
How many women have you been with?
You're not like me. You're too gullible.
I just didn't want to burst your bubble.
That makes two of us.
Bragging all day about how many dates you
got. Like I didn't know you made that up.
Russian chicks, German, Croatian.
Was any of that real?
You've gone insane. I'm not talking to you.
You even lied about Sophia Loren for years.
Who are you trying to fool?
You think people are idiots?
Nobody knows who you are in Italy.
You could be sued for slander
and thrown into an Italian jail.
Always pretending to know about art.
Do you know women? Or art?
Look at this stupid place you found.
Stupid place? It fits your
stupid paintings well.
You're blaming me because
no gallery would take your art?
- I never wanted to do the exhibition.
- Never wanted or never dared?
You can fool others, but not me.
So I'm not an artist.
Nor are you a curator.
You listen to me. From now on,
I'm not helping you with anything.
Like I need your help.
Take your paintings and hang them
in the Senior Citizens' Activity Center.
- I can hang them in any place I want.
- It's no longer my business.
Just wait and see.
Mr. B, come to Bund 18 now.
I'll pass. I'm in the middle of something.
I'm gonna kill you if you don't come.
You have to be here, I'll wait.
I'm sorry.
Mr. B?
Come.
How did you two wind up together?
What are you afraid of?
We just went to see this play.
What play? Was it good?
Nah, it's boring.
It's one of those vulgar love stories.
And they just went on and
on about the same thing.
That's the problem with male writers.
To them, there are only two kinds of women.
Sluts and virgins.
One broke his heart.
The other treats him like his mom does.
Then she doesn't want anything.
And either one of these women
will end up with an average guy.
Like a woman would drop dead
if she didn't get married.
And this director guy must think of himself
as some kind of expert on women.
Oh, that's how you ladies think.
Well, your comment makes me
ashamed for all the male Chinese directors.
I should apologize to you on their behalf.
We are sorry.
Mr. B, if you're going to apologize,
you'll be a traitor to all men.
They'll say you're not a real man.
A man's manhood is not something
he shows off in front of women.
Boy, Mr. B, are you not the confident type.
Well, I'm not that confident.
It's just that women have taught me a lot.
I can see that.
Mr. B, you must have been with
plenty of women in your lifetime.
Given my age, I'd be lying if I said no.
In fact, I just learned
something the other day.
Well, one is never too old to learn.
Although there is still so much I don't
understand, I'll take it in bit by bit.
Mr. B, what do you think of this gallery?
Ms. Li secured it for you.
Really?
They'll charge me for this place, right?
Nonsense.
It is a privilege for them
to host your exhibition.
Just cut them a slice of commission
for each painting sold.
The owner will discuss
the terms with you later.
And I'll take care of the grand opening.
I went to many business schools, remember?
An average guy would not
agree to this arrangement.
For it hurts his self-esteem.
Have you been to the Louvre?
Indeed.
Let me think about it.
What is there to think about?
It's a freebie.
Why did you ask me to come
in the middle of the night?
I have a date at this disco
place on Donghu Street.
I need your help selecting the paintings.
For what? Your memorial service?
Don't you think it's too early?
I've found the place
and the exhibition opens next week.
Who found it?
The two women you bashed.
What place? Now you know
fooling around pays off, huh?
Fooling around is not bad.
So, what place exactly?
The Bund.
In the park? An outdoor exhibition?
I asked you to help me pick paintings.
What's with all these questions?
I need to know where it's at.
I'm a professional curator.
Different locations, lighting, or crowds
call for different exhibits.
Indoor and outdoor are
two completely different styles.
It's a gallery. Bund 18.
So, it is... a legitimate gallery.
We're gonna do some serious selecting then.
For example, this is not
right for the occasion.
When are you going to the disco place?
In about 15 minutes.
I'll do a preliminary
selection for you today.
Tomorrow I'll go check out this gallery
then come back for the final selecting.
This is huge. Can't mess around with it.
Tomorrow night I'll have both of them
over for dinner. As a thank you.
Are you coming?
I have a date.
We'll see.
And also,
do you have a name for the exhibition?
Nope. I'm thinking, something simple.
It has to be badass.
Something ambiguous and ethereal.
Mr. Busy for Nothing.
No. That's not badass.
Get me some water.
Okay, good, get it out.
This wasn't even cool 20 years ago.
Why are they still displaying it?
Who the heck are you?
I'm just passing by.
- What do you know?
- What the heck do you know?
- How much art have you seen?
- What?
Have you been to the Louvre? Or the MET?
How about the Guggenheim?
There's a barrier to entry
for art, you know that?
- Not just anyone is qualified to be a critic.
- Why are you so angry?
Did you go to college?
- I'm a graduate of North Film Academy.
- And then?
- Then I wrote a book.
- And then?
- Then I sold vapes for a while.
- And now?
Now I teach at an art school.
See?
- It is the likes of you...
- Don't get so worked up.
That mislead the youth.
Chinese kids today have poor taste
all because of people like you.
And you have the nerve to come here talking crazy.
Just leave. Or I'll ask you to buy a ticket.
You got it?
- Who was that?
- Nobody. Just an asshole.
He looks like that chef guy on YouTube.
What are you doing here?
My mom told me to.
- What?
- You got a smudge here.
It's my eyeliner, bro.
So, you admit you're wearing eyeliner?
Nobody can tell unless
they're looking closely.
Then what's the point of wearing it?
My eyes are swollen from crying.
I had to cover them.
Please, so she unfriended you.
A man shouldn't cry over
something like that.
- Son.
- What are you doing here?
I have guests tonight.
So what? You don't have
to tell me everything.
- Mr. B.
- Hey, you guys are here.
- Come have a few drinks tonight.
- Not today. I'm no match for you.
- Bai Ge's here.
- Hi, Ms. Li.
Allow me to introduce...
This is Mr. B's son, Bai Ge.
What a fine-looking young man.
He takes after his mother. Thank God.
You guys have a seat.
Bai Ge, go bring the ladies water.
Show some hospitality to our guests.
- There's something I need to tell you.
- We can talk here.
You should know that this was never
my decision. It was your mother's.
What?
She wants you to transfer
ownership of this house to your son.
- What house?
- This house.
That's crazy. I'm still alive.
And I'm single.
Exactly. What if you got married?
Bullshit.
Your mom told me that
you're planning to get married.
She was so worried that she went
to the notary office several times.
That's insanity! What's wrong with her?
Bai Ge, come help me.
What does this contain?
Amidogen and soap base. Quiet.
Cut it out.
Sister, you have sensitive skin,
so amino acid will do.
As for makeup remover,
nothing with alcohol.
But how would I know?
Just shake it. If there's foam,
then there's no alcohol.
You know better than
that cosmetics streamer.
Take a look at my face for me.
- Sister, you have a combination skin type.
- Combination skin?
So you should use a soap-based face wash.
And then use makeup remover
with a strong emulsifier.
What emulsifier? Stop talking crazy.
- Quiet.
- What oily skin?
Jeez, just stop talking. Your boy's
teaching us about beauty products.
What could he possibly teach you?
- One is never too old to learn. You said it.
- That's right.
He puts on makeup every day,
I can't even tell if he's a man.
He doesn't look like a man, you know?
Why are you so square?
In this day and age,
what's wrong with men wearing makeup?
So women can use it, but men can't?
You're being sexist.
I'm not sexist. I respect
women more than anything.
I just think a stupid kid like him doesn't
deserve to use women's beauty products.
Well, he's not using any.
No eye shadow or lipstick.
- That's right.
- So what if I put on makeup?
Don't you groom yourself, too?
Buying those sexy shorts.
Uncle A'de told me all about it.
You even gave me underwear you didn't like
and fooled me they're regular shorts.
You didn't think I'd know?
I'm an expert on beauty products.
I'm taking heat from the sissy.
You little brat.
Save your old man some face, would ya?
Say, Mr. B, we're starving.
Would you go cook now?
Don't be mad.
It's alright. Calm down.
Why are you being so mean to our son?
He's not the one asking for the house.
I know, I know. It's not him I'm mad at.
Rest assured.
I'll go see your mother
and talk her out of it.
It's not like you're getting married
any day now, right?
- What are you doing here?
- You told me to come inside.
Bring this dish outside to
the yard, Makeup Expert.
It's true? Sophia Loren herself?
Don't buy any of that. He's been
telling the same story for over ten years.
Why don't you just tell people that Elizabeth
Taylor also had an affair with you?
Lao Wu is the best liar I know.
For the record,
Elizabeth Taylor, the Hollywood legend,
had no romantic relationship with me.
It has always been Sophia Loren.
- The Casablanca Crossing.
- The Cassandra Crossing.
What about Sophia Loren?
You mean that news that she just passed
away? I read it on social media yesterday.
Stop spreading fake news.
You guys don't know?
Sophia fainted on a film set yesterday.
Then she was rushed to a hospital,
but they couldn't save her.
I'm not sure if it was real.
Where did you read that?
Stop spreading fake news.
Look for yourself.
Around 1989, I was in my 20s...
when I studied in France
at cole Polytechnique.
During spring break sophomore year, I visited
Rome and at some point I lost my way.
So, I just followed this path in Piazza
Venezia, which led me to an alleyway.
And that's where I saw her,
sitting there sipping coffee.
Just a small coffee house by the street.
The kind with canopies.
She looked 40-something.
I didn't know who she was back then,
but I got this feeling that she was lonely.
So, I walked up to her and I said...
"Do you know how to get to the fountain
from that Fellini film, La Dolce Vita?"
She pulled her sunglasses down
and said she'd take me there.
I said okay.
We meandered through the streets,
chatting all the way.
She said she was in a bad mood.
I asked her why.
She mumbled a bunch of things in Italian,
I didn't understand a word of it.
By the time we got to the
fountain, it was dark.
She said she hated La Dolce
Vita, and Marcello, too.
She preferred Satyricon,
another film by Fellini.
I said I never saw it.
And she was like, "Do you
want to see it?" I said yes.
So, she took me to this small hotel,
but we didn't see Satyricon.
He lost his virginity to her.
And she gave him all of Rome.
She never told me who
she was and I didn't ask.
I thought she was just some married woman.
You don't go around and
ask people that, right?
The next day, she took me to the Vatican.
On the third day, she told me that
she had to go to the States for work.
So, I said, "When will we meet again?"
She said, "You want to see me again?"
I said, "Yeah."
And she said,
"It's best that we don't see each other
again, so that you'll always remember me."
I said, "No, I won't. I'm a playboy
who dates tons of women."
And she said, "You're the first Chinese man
I've ever been with."
I said, "Then you will always remember me."
And she said, "Let's wait and see."
After she left, it felt like
Rome had collapsed on me.
I returned to Paris and told
my girlfriend everything.
She was a Russian girl named Natasha.
I said I made a mistake,
then she got angry and we had a fight.
She even called me a traitor to Socialism,
and she hit me.
I didn't want to fight her or
argue with her, so we broke up.
What about Sophia? When did
you find out who she was?
After I broke up with Natasha, I lost it.
I couldn't study.
Just wandering the streets,
sleeping in movie theaters.
Once I woke up in the middle of the night
and saw that...
it was her on the screen.
I still remember that movie.
Saturday, Sunday and Monday.
It was her.
It was definitely her.
Later I asked my classmates who she was.
And they told me she was this superstar.
An European treasure.
To this day, I still
haven't seen Satyricon.
I don't know why.
Do you like the story?
I made it up.
Are you okay?
Are you okay?
Don't drink anymore.
I'm fine.
It's fake.
What?
Keep eating. Don't stare at me.
Once I had a sweetheart
A sweetheart brave and true
His hair was dark and straight
His loving eyes were black
He told me that he loved me
And he often proved it so
And he often came to see me
When the evening sun was low
Lao Wu.
You died too soon.
It turns out that Sophia Loren
made a narrow escape from the grave
and you headed straight into it.
I know you never missed anything.
I just didn't expect that to include death.
Brother, have one last drink.
[Dearest Friend, Lao Wu]
Who knew Uncle Wu was really childless?
He had no one.
Without us, he'd be pretty lonely.
Yeah.
Why did Lao Wu pick this
place a long time ago?
He always liked to be different.
What do you think?
Was that Sophia Loren story real?
No way.
He wore thick glasses
from a very young age.
I think it's true.
Reality is not a Fellini film.
Alex.
I asked Beibei. You never
gave her the high-heels.
I told Bai Ge to sell them online.
Why would you give her a new pair of shoes?
Come on now.
Just get the paperwork done for the house.
Don't you give it to another woman.
You must leave it to Bai Ge.
Relax. I'm not marrying anyone.
But if Bai Ge wants a house,
he should buy it with his own money.
You didn't buy that house with your
own money. Your grandpa left it to you.
And the properties you did buy for
yourself, the two flats by the stairs...
- Bai Ge will get all of them when I die.
- Come on now.
It's bad luck talking about those things
in such a place.
Are you an idiot?
[Curator - Lao Wu]
Mr. B?
You were good friends with Lao Wu, right?
Here's the thing. I represent a
real estate company in Europe.
Lao Wu's house here was permanently
lent to him free of charge, until he dies.
So, now we're taking it back.
When did this happen?
Since 1990.
Who hired you?
You can't say, right?
Yeah.
Look,
this was Lao Wu's favorite whisky.
You should keep it.
And we have some papers to sign. Thank you.
Yeah, sure.
You dropped your backpack. Too heavy?
Mr. B.
You're wearing the new dress. Like it?
I'm gonna paint another one.
How about I paint you a new hat?
I'm planning to have a memorial service
tomorrow night. To remember Lao Wu.
- Are you coming?
- Sure, I'll be there.
I'm sorry about Lao Wu.
I know.
But I never believed his story,
it's too good to be true.
I thought the story
through and I don't buy it.
The woman wasn't Sofia. I always knew it.
I just didn't want to burst his bubble.
You were just being a friend.
Well, I always found him annoying.
Now, I'm finally at peace.
And I don't think I'll ever meet
someone like him again.
Who disagrees with everything and everyone.
Gossiping about people all day.
We used to have lots of mutual friends
and then they all just cut him off,
not hanging with or talking to him.
I was the only one left.
Because you're his best friend.
He was my best friend.
Try not to be too sad.
It happened suddenly,
but I don't think he suffered.
And I've been thinking these past two days.
I think Lao Wu lived a fantastic life.
I can't compete with him.
His life is like a legend
and mine is like a joke.
What?
That's a good one.
Why are you always like this?
- I'm not talking to you.
- Go home to your mommy, then.
- I'm leaving now.
- Go ahead.
Bai Ge.
[Myth of Love]
Not too much.
Thank you.
It actually smells good.
You want some?
Mr. B.
You guys hungry? I'll go
fetch you some snacks.
That'd be great.
- What's this movie about?
- I don't get it.
It makes me dizzy.
- I expected it to be a lot more fun.
- Kind of scary.
What does it have to do with love?
See the wrinkles underneath my eyes?
Do you understand the movie?
Me, neither.
Ancient Roman history is
not exactly my strong suit.
It's about ancient Roman history?
[Let's go for some coffee
tomorrow afternoon.]
Here, have some snacks.
Mr. B, these are peanuts from Lao Da Chang.
Wow, you can taste that?
These butterfly cookies are fantastic.
I made a special run for the cookies.
A small bakery on Tian Yue Qiao Street
makes them exclusively, and job well done.
- How do you know?
- I thought it was Park Hotel.
I grew up eating butterfly cookies,
so now I'm sick of them.
I also like Tang Gao (deep fried donut).
So, none of you are watching the movie.
Should we fast forward?
Good idea.
Man, I can't stand this film.
Can't stand it.
[Mr. B's Moment] [Gloria: Satyricon is so
bad, what nonsense. I feel sorry for Lao Wu.]
[Beibei: I don't quite get the ending.
Did the man and the woman end up together?]
[Yangyang: Which ones are
you talking about? (Dizzy)]
[Bai Ge: No wonder Lao Wu didn't watch the
film. He might go nuts if he did. (Broken)]
[Ms. Li: This movie I just saw was such a head-scratcher,
but I enjoyed it. Does that make me a masochist?]
[Gloria: Yes.]
[Beibei: Yeah.]
[Liked by Mr. B.]
[Message to Ms. Li]
[Ms. Li: Let's go grab
a cup of coffee tomorrow afternoon.]
[Mr. B: You like that?]
[Ms. Li: Yes.]
[Mr. B: Me? Or the film?]
[Ms. Li: I've always liked it, but am ready for a new
one. I'm afraid it might be another disappointment.]
[Mr. B: So you left halfway through.]
[Ms. Li: It was too
fast-paced in the beginning.]
[Mr. B: It's the film's fault.]
[Ms. Li: No, it's mine.
I'm just a bad movie fan.]
[Mr. B: It's slowing down now.]
[Ms. Li: I was drawn to the story
and found it fascinating.]
[Ms. Li: It doesn't matter how it ends.]
[Mr. B: We can rewrite the story together,
so it'd end the way you like.]
[Ms. Li: Sure! But I like tragedies, LOL.]
[Mr. B: You are horrible...]
[Mr. B: You are adorable.]
[Ms. Li: Maya asked me
whether we had a fight.]
[Mr. B: What did you tell her?]
[Ms. Li: I told her to go write her homework,
then she told me to control my temper.]
[Mr. B: Maya (Thumbs up)]
[Mr. B: See you tomorrow.]
[Ms. Li: See you.]