Ben and Suzanne: A Reunion in 4 Parts (2024) Movie Script
1
Phew!
- Very hot.
- Yeah.
Yeah, wow.
- Very hot.
- Uh-huh.
Uh, where-- where
is she with the car?
This is the
blue one, the BMW.
Oh, okay, all right.
Uh...
- Hello, Ben.
- Oh, hi!
- Hi, I'm Priyanthi.
- Hi!
I'm
Suzanne's manager.
I have to send her now
to finish up some business
for me.
I'm really very
sorry, you know,
that she
couldn't be here today,
but don't worry!
She'll be here tomorrow.
Um, would you like some tea?
Uh, no, thank you, I'm fine.
Oh.
Uh...
He's asking
if you can speak Sinhala.
Oh.
Uh, no, uh, I can
understand Tamil.
Ah!
Ah, a little bit.
You look India.
Uh...I am Indian.
Hello!
Hi, baybo!
How's the
balance sheet looking?
It's...getting there.
There's still a little
more work to be done.
Yes, yes.
As long as it's not below
the reconciliation target.
We might
be a little below target.
Oh...
Okay, I'll have a
look at it tomorrow,
and then, we'll
take it on from there.
Okay, thank you.
Is Ben there?
Yes, he is!
He's here.
He claims he not
hungry, but I don't trust it.
Would you like to
speak with him?
Yes.
Okay! Ben?
Here!
Yrrrt!
Oh
my God, I'm so sorry!
No, no, no, no!
It's totally fine!
No,
I should have been there!
It's-- it's fine.
You know, Priyanthi
explained everything,
so what's
another day, you know?
I tried calling you.
Yeah, my phone's
been stuck on roaming.
Oh!
We'll get you a
local SIM card.
Uh, yeah!
Maybe.
How was the flight?
Um...
I drank some
complimentary wine
and caught up
on my rom coms.
But honestly, I couldn't
really do much of anything;
I just kept...
thinking about the moment
that I get to
see you and, uh...
I'm
so sorry that I couldn't
-be there.
-No, it's--
I feel terrible.
It's fine!
It's fine.
I just keep thinking about...
I don't know,
seeing you and...
kissing you and...
holding you and...
ugh!
There's so much...
pent-up tenderness and...
Uh, we should--
we should
probably get to sleep.
I can't wait to see you!
Yeah, same!
Um...
Get some good sleep.
I will see you in a few hours.
I can't wait...
though I suppose I'll have to!
Um...
Love you.
Love you too.
Are you done?
Hello?
Hello?
Hello?
Hello, sir?
Hello?
Sir, Pettah bus stand.
Pettah bus stand, this one.
Okay, thank you.
Okay...
I-- oh!
I come bearing gifts, okay?
Um...
from America...
I bring you Takis.
- Mm-hm.
- Um...
And from Sri
Lanka, duty free...
- Toblerone.
- My God!
It's a Toblerone.
- Is this a bit?
- It's a bit.
This is
highly impractical.
So do you, like...
always wear a mask now or...?
Oh!
I didn't even notice.
I...
That's a lot of
vacation reading.
Uh...
yeah!
Never know what'll
strike your fancy!
You're not
gonna read all of these.
It's okay if I don't
ready any of them.
I brought them;
that's the point.
I think the
point is you reading them.
Oh, hey, lemme
show you something.
Note the
condition of this book.
How would you
describe its condition?
- Like new?
- Practically mint.
"December 1996,
- uria cara, Suzanna..."
- Oh...
"Suzanna," "Suzanne," right?
"...The woman with
the serious eyes,
,
for
conversations past, present,
and future, and difficulties
yet to be faced and overcome,
here -- here -- another
companion to take with us
along the way.
I am most
grateful we met,
and glad, too, for the
incidental torments.
With appreciation,
,"
and then there's a name
here that I can't recognize
or make out.
That's nice!
I bought this book used, okay?
There's not a
crease in the spine,
none of the
pages are marked...
Mm-hm.
She didn't take her
companion along with her,
she didn't even read the book!
She sold it to The Strand for
30 percent off the list price!
Maybe she prefers Elaine May!
Even if you don't read
it, you gotta keep it.
Why?
Because it's meaningful.
It comes from the heart.
We don't
know their relationship.
Why do you automatically
take the side of this guy?
Okay, true, true.
I mean, it's way less romantic
to think about it like that.
What is romantic
about a textbook on a
known misogynist?
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
I don't...know about all that.
Dhamika has
got your room ready,
and lunch is also ready.
Ready when you guys are.
Um...
We're not staying together?
It's not really
okay for us to stay in the
same room.
But we're a couple.
But it's not proper.
Thank you.
- Ah...
- It looks great.
Papers? Here.
- Yes.
- Okay.
- This is just rice?
- This is just rice.
Yeah, this is
just rice with a little bit of
- fried onions and stuff.
- Oop!
It's
okay, no worries,
no worries, don't
worry about it.
Okay.
This was made very
specially for you, Suzanne.
Aw, thank you, Priyanthi.
Am I, uh...
am I-- am I doing this right?
You really have to
just mix it all in.
Oh!
So you take a little
bit of rice first...
Mm-hm.
And then keep adding
the curries one by one...
Okay.
And then just mix it
together the way she's doing.
So, what are you plans?
What are you guys
going to do now?
Uh, we really haven't had much
chance to chat about it yet.
Didn't you look at
the doc I sent you?
Oh, yeah!
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Definitely did.
Um...
There was
something about a cave...
We're gonna travel
mostly by train...
Okay.
We're gonna go through the
cultural Triangle Area...
Mm-hm.
Up to Jaffna, down to Ella,
and then end up at
Hikkaduwa for the beach.
Oh, that sounds
like a great plan!
- Yeah!
- Yeah.
Yeah, I just didn't
remember all the particulars.
I'm definitely down for
some beach hangs, though.
But maybe...
not for the whole time.
What's wrong with the beach?
I don't really swim.
You can swim.
I mean, I'm more
of a pool swimmer.
Well, if you had
looked at the doc,
we could have
done something else.
No, no, no, I'm good!
I'm-- I'm down for
whatever -- walking around,
checking out
some cool bars
and finding a
bookstore maybe...
All the books are gonna
be in Sinhala and Tamil.
Oh, but I can
understand Tamil.
You can't read Tamil.
Okay...
I'm sorry, Priyanthi, does
the brinjal have Maldives fish
in it?
It should not, but let me see.
I think there is.
Dhamika!
Dhamika!
Vegetarian!
Vegan!
V-E-G-A-N!
Vegan!
Oh--
No, no, it's...
totally fine.
No worries at all.
I'm sure he can turn up
something else for you.
Wait, wait, since
when were you vegan?
I don't know,
three months maybe?
You didn't-- you
didn't tell me that.
I'm really
good with the pol sambol.
I'm sure I did!
I'm pretty sure I'd
remember you telling me that.
I'm sure I told you.
-Is it an allergy?
-No.
-Is it a moral choice?
-Kind of?
So do you, like, love tea now?
Are you a tea drinker?
Black tea actually kind
of hurts my stomach so--
You know what?
You should try milk with it.
Oh, wait!
You're a vegan.
How come you
never told me that?
I didn't not tell you.
Well, you never mentioned it.
I just don't understand why
everyone makes such a big deal
about people's
dietary choices.
No, no, no, no, no.
It's not just about
a dietary choice.
It's a life decision.
Okay, look, I fully
support it, but...
it is significant.
I just didn't wanna eat
animal byproducts anymore.
I thought you quit!
I did!
These are just
vacation cigarettes.
Uh-huh.
-What?!
-Mm.
-After this carton, I'm done!
-Carton?!
Yeah, you can't just
buy a box at duty free!
Oh my God, that's a lot
of fucking cigarettes.
Mm...
But they're not
just any cigarettes...
they're Korean.
Yeah, what does that mean?
I don't know, they're
really fuckin' cool.
Come on...
I mean, yeah, it
looks like a cigarette.
- I'm really not addicted.
- Mm...
How's your cat?
You mean our
cat, once you're back?
That
is what I meant.
How's Ernst?
Lubitsch.
But his first name
is Ernst, right?
Yeah, I call
him "Lubitsch" now.
Mm...
I missed you.
I missed you too.
This is good.
10 days, just you and
me, quality time...
And then you'll be
back in February.
March.
Okay, for real this time?
For real.
What's the bug
situation like out here?
- There are bugs!
- Yeah?
Okay, but, like,
what are we talking?
We're talking, like,
Starship Trooper-level shit?
I don't know what that is.
Starship Troopers?
Verhoeven?
Caspar Van Dien?
Denise Richards?
"The only good
bug is a dead...?"
We watched it at
that hotel in Maine!
I've never seen that movie.
Oh my God, you have
a terrible memory!
I don't have a
terrible memory,
I've just never
seen that movie.
Okay, well, now...
We have a mission.
Oh, I think it is highly
unlikely that you will find
Starship
Troopers in Sri Lanka.
Well, I believe in miracles.
Suzanne?
Aah!
- Oh my God, h-- uh--
- Sorry.
You okay?
I'm fine.
Okay, I'm gonna...
Wait for you out there.
Sorry, yeah, okay.
Okay.
Dhamika?
Dhamika?
Prianthi?
-Oh, hi, baybo!
-Hi!
Um...
Would it be all
right with you...
Mm-hm?
If Suzanne stayed in my room,
or I could stay in her room,
if you don't mind?
I don't care!
It's perfectly
all right by me!
Okay.
-Dhamika?
-Okay.
Great.
Hey!
Ready?
Yeah.
Hey, check it out.
Books in English.
What'd you find?
Oh.
Is this us?
- Hello
- Hello!
What can I get you?
Uh, Americano.
Yes.
Uh, can I have a
espresso martini?
Vegan, please?
So you can try some.
I'm kind of doing a
dry thing right now.
Seriously?!
What?
I don't know, couldn't that
have waited until January?
Can't I be merry
without drinking?
I don't think so.
- Hello!
- Hi!
Uh,.
- Ah...
- Um...
Uh, do you have...
Starship Troopers movie?
English movie?
Yeah, this way.
Let me check.
- Whoa...
- This is great.
Cool.
Wow.
What?
-You would find that one.
-What is this?
What is that?
Karaoke?
-Excuse me.
-Oh!
Whoa!
Thank you.
You're welcome, sir.
- Wow.
- Oh my gosh!
It's a miracle!
- Crazy coincidence.
- No, no, no!
We talked about it yesterday,
and we found it today.
We went to a video
store and you asked if they
- had it.
- Yeah, and they did!
So...
Hey, do you
think that, uh...
the karaoke disc
is actually porn?
No, I do not think it's porn.
You know what I miss?
Well, what I regret, really?
What do you regret?
I don't know, that we didn't
really try sexting and stuff.
I did!
You rejected me.
What?!
I sent you a photo
and your response was:
-"Awesome," period.
-No, no, no, no!
That is the wrong tone!
It was actually like...
"Awesome!!"
Fuck!
Anyway, being alone is
not very conducive to sexy
feelings, so...
I don't know about you,
but I felt it on the regs.
How often did you do it?
Uh...
frequently?
What's "frequently?"
One to...several...
Several?!
Is that even enjoyable?!
After a while, it
just kinda hurts.
Wait, so if I called,
there would be a
very strong chance...
-Yeah.
-That you would
be jacking off?
If you called.
- Hey, I called!
I'm kidding, I'm kidding.
Okay, so...
what about you?
It's probably less than...
-several...
-Oh, definitely.
But, like, how often
were you jackin' it off?
Less than several.
Okay, but how much?
- Since being here?
- Yeah, obviously.
Zero.
-Never?
-Never.
Wait, wait, wait, so-- so
the last time that you...
-Yes.
-Was with me...
Yes!
I said yes!
- Back in the States, wow!
- You're smirking!
Wow!
Oh...
Well, look...
our long national
nightmare is over,
because...
I spoke to
Prianthi about the rooms,
and she's cool with it!
Ben,
you spoke to her?
Yeah!
And she doesn't care!
I never said that
she cared, I care.
Wait, do you...
do you not wanna stay with me?
No, Ben...
She's my boss,
I'm her employee,
you're my partner,
we're in her house.
-Oh, okay.
-Come on...
Well, I guess I
didn't really...
think about it like that.
But
look, I'll be good!
You cannot be
trusted, Mister Several.
I can be trusted, okay?!
I swear!
We won't...
do anything, I...
I just wanna be close to you.
Fine.
But no funny business!
Well, no...intentional
funny business.
What do you mean
"intentional?"
Well, look, if our business
just so happens to turn
funny...
Well, that's the
natural flow of things.
I-- I-- you know,
it can't be stopped.
It can be stopped!
Any funny business in the
house of my employer will be
brought to a swift
and orderly halt!
That was a fun day.
Yeah.
It was pretty fun.
I can't believe we
found Starship Troopers.
How's your jet lag?
All right.
Yeah.
I feel pretty awake.
I hope you can sleep.
I'm pretty beat.
Goodnight.
Are you hard?
It's
purely physiological.
Can you stop?
Sorry, I...
I just-- I can't force
it; I have to feel it.
Well, that's unfortunate...
that you don't feel it.
We've been alone a long time.
Yeah, well...
we're not alone anymore.
- Hey, guys!
- Hi!
So, what's on
the agenda today?
Oh, uh, well, Suzanne
got us tickets --
uh, train tickets --
to Kandy...
Oh...
And so we're gonna
settle in tonight,
and I think tomorrow morning,
we're gonna go to the...
Tooth Temple?
Temple of the Tooth.
Temple of the Tooth.
That's very lovely!
Kandy is a
beautiful place to be.
Um, so...
I took a look at these
accounts last night.
We are below our target.
Those targets
were set before the economy
collapsed.
Our clients'
circumstances have changed.
I know, but unfortunately,
we can't bend things here.
The bank is very
firm on their request.
We've got to
recoup 80 percent.
But we have a trip planned.
Perfect!
I have a driver here.
He's got his new van.
So while Ben is getting
his Sri Lankan experience,
and you all are
zipping this way, that way,
up and down
-- it's a small place,
you know, this country --
you could go have
a look at this.
Okay.
Hey, Mohommed.
Do you mind if I
play some music?
- Yeah.
- Okay.
Hey!
I made us a mixtape!
Suzanne!
-Suzanne!
-What?
Are you wearing headphones?!
Sorry, I...
thought I had
noise cancelling off.
Okay, this is very bad!
You're in-- you
have work brain!
Work brain is very
different from vacation brain!
Why can't my brain do both?
Well,
multitasking isn't a thing!
Look, the brain has very
different neural pathways
between work mode
and vacation mode,
so you have to decide
what you want to prioritize:
work brain or vacation brain!
Not everything is this
binary that you decide exists.
What are you even
listening to anyway?
Podcast.
A podcast?!
What's wrong with podcasts?
I don't know,
it's just, like...
information!
In 17th-century Germany,
10 percent of women were
astronomers.
I learned that in a podcast.
Okay, I guess that's
kinda cool, but...
like, what is it
doing for your soul?!
I don't know what
it's doing for my soul,
but it's interesting.
Can I just play us some music?
Mm-hm.
- Yeah?
- Sure.
Okay.
I like song "Low Low."
By Flo Rida?
Yup!
Uh, I-- I
don't think I have it.
Oh...
I'll just be a minute.
Hi.
I'm Suzanne Hopper, I'm
with Economic Integrity.
-Come in.
-Thank you.
Oh, geez!
Throw, throw, throw, throw!
Oh, shit!
Ow!
I'm sorry.
How'd it go?
Hilarious.
Can I read you something?
Mm.
"Optimism is not only a
false but also a pernicious
doctrine, for it presents
life as a desirable state
and a man's happiness
as its aim and object.
Starting from this, everyone
then believes he has the most
legitimate claim to
happiness and enjoyment.
If these do not
fall to his lot,
he believes that he
suffers an injustice.
In fact, he misses the
whole point of his existence,
whereas it is far more
correct to regard work,
privation,
misery, and suffering,
crowned by death, as the
aim and object of our life."
Isn't that interesting?
Yeah!
I mean, it's pretty bleak.
It's reality.
Reality is bleak.
Well, it doesn't
really inspire me to...
wake up and take on the day.
Don't you think if we
accepted our reality,
we would maybe be happier?
Uh...
Is work stressing you out?
Yes...
Okay, I have kind
of a weird question.
Scratch that; it
is pretty weird.
Um...
What...exactly...do you do?
-What?
-No, no, no.
I mean, obviously, I
know...what you do.
It's like...
NGO stuff.
Is that what you
tell people at parties?
Well, you don't talk about it.
I manage a series
of microcredit loans
for small female-owned
businesses.
It's onboarding,
basic training,
financial literacy
classes, though mostly,
I work out of the office doing
bookkeeping and digitizing
the ledgers.
Yeah, that's
basically what I thought.
But now, I am responsible for
recouping the loan payments.
So you're a debt collector?
Essentially.
Why don't you just quit?
I can't quit!
Why not?
I have a duty to my clients!
Well, uh...
okay, not to sound flippant,
but it sounds like your
clients would be okay
if you weren't performing
your duties.
Okay, but they didn't know
what they were signing up for.
They didn't sign
up forthis!
It's what the lenders prey on.
And if I quit, it just gets
kicked up to some bureaucrat
at the bank who doesn't
give a fuck about any of this.
Do you think I'm a monster?
No!
No, I swear, I don't.
It's just a shitty
situation for everybody,
and you're just
doing your job.
That's what the Nazis said.
Good morning!
Good morning.
You're up early.
Yeah, well, couldn't
sleep, it's Christmas Eve,
I'm going to my
partner's house,
I'm very excited.
Don't get your hopes up.
It's just a place.
Made you some coffee.
Thank
you, thank you.
You're the best.
-Ben.
-Yeah.
Come here.
Did you smoke?
No.
You smell like smoke.
Um...
I...maybe...had a quick puff?
Why did you lie?
Well, if I had
gotten away with it,
it really wouldn't have
made a difference so...
-That's not cool!
-Oh my God.
It's really
quite a harmless lie.
Okay...
I know these are your
vacation cigarettes...
But if smoking is your norm,
then maybe you can take a
vacation from that.
Hm?
Okay, yeah.
Yeah.
Aiyo!
Ayy!
Aiyo!
"Aiyo" mean "Oh
my God, very sad!"
Aiyo!
Oh, shit.
Oh, wow!
Okay!
We're doin' it!
- Okay!
- Wow!
-This is it!
-Ho-ly cow!
Wow!
Oh, you don't have to
take your shoes off.
Okay.
Uh...
And you don't have
to close the door.
Okay.
This is not the United States.
I'm just gonna
put on some water.
Wow...
Well, welcome to Sri Lanka.
Hey, thanks, man!
This is the bedroom.
Okay!
Sparkling clean,
spic and span.
Whoa, it's a fuckin' mess!
Jesus!
Okay, well, I would've
cleaned if I had known we were
stopping here.
Come on.
Is that a machete?!
Mohommed, do you
want tea, Samahan...?
Tea, please.
Thank you, madame.
Oh,
Ben, what about you?
Do you want tea or Samahan?
What-- what's the second one?
It's Samahan!
-It's...
-Uh...
Oh!
"Good for difficulties
in day-to-day work!"
Yeah!
I'll have, like, a
million of these.
Hey, come on!
I wanna go see that rock!
Let's go!
Let's go, let's go!
Cigarette?
May I have cigarette?
Oh!
Yeah.
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
-Thank you.
-Okay, okay, yep, yep, yep.
- Hey.
- Hey!
Okay, cave then rock?
Rock then cave?
I think rock then
cave is the preferred order.
Perfect, let's do it.
Um, I actually
would really like to just bust
through this bookkeeping...
And then I'll be totally done!
And then, it's just
vacation brain for the rest
-of the time.
-Okay.
- I'm sorry.
- Fine.
You really
shouldn't be working!
Okay, it's Christmas
Eve, it's a bank holiday,
right?
It's not
a holiday for me.
All right.
Fine.
Finish your work.
- Miss you.
- You guys have fun.
Okay!
Mohommed!
Just the two of us!
Let's go!
Bye, Mohommed!
Ben?
Guys!
-Merry Christmas!
-Merry Christmas.
Oh...
Okay, Mohommed,
this is for you.
- Merry Christmas!
- Merry Christmas!
Thank you so much.
No problem!
- Rip it, man!
- Get in there!
Rip it open!
- Yeah!
- Yes!
Wow, cigarette!
My goodness!
Wow, I love this one.
- Thank you so much, sir.
- No, thank you.
-Thank you.
-Thank you so much.
Okay, who's next?
Who's next?
You!
You, you!
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
- Oh, God!
- Heavy?
-Yeah!
-Jesus!
Uh, should I read the card?
-Yes.
-Okay.
Thank you.
Merry Christmas.
Ugh, okay, uh, I'm
gonna open this up!
Okay...
What is it?
- Don't shake it!
- Okay, okay.
Open, open, quick!
Oh...my...God!
It's a DVD player!
Starship Troopers, baby.
Yeah!
Oh my gosh!
This is amazing!
Where did you find this?!
Mm, I have my ways.
So cool!
Oh...
Sick!
Thank you.
Thank you.
-Oh, God...
-All right, my turn.
Uh, n...
-What?
-No, it's really stupid.
-Ben, come on!
-No, no, no, no!
-I wanna open my gift!
-No, it's not really that--
I'm sure it's fine!
I'm sure it's great.
Okay...
Um...
What the hell is this?
It's a...
bluetooth-enabled,
synchronized...
vibrator and
Fleshlight combo pack.
What?
Uh, it's a bluetooth-enabled,
synchronized vibrator
and Fleshlight
combo pack.
God, why is it open?
It-- I had to
charge it, that's why!
-I told you it was stupid.
-Uh-huh.
-It's really stupid.
-Yeah.
-Thank you.
-Wow, shit, man!
Jesus!
Hi, Suzanne, ma'am.
Thank you for a bed.
See you, Mister Ben...
Goodnight.
See you tomorrow. Bye!
- Bye, Mohommed!
- Bye, Mohommed!
- Sleep well!
- Sleep well!
Thanks.
-Okay...
-Now's the time.
-Here we go.
-This is the moment.
-1997...
-Mm-hm.
-Classic film...
-Mm-hm.
Starship Troopers
-- are you ready?
-This better be as good
as you say it is--
-I'm so excited!
'Cause it took me a long
time to track that thing down.
What the...?!
Shh!
Mohommed is sleeping.
Nooo!
"Region one?!"
Nooo!
Shh!
I'm so sorry.
Oh my God!
What the hell?!
We came all this way!
I don't think the
universe wants me to see
-Starship Troopers!
-Stoooop!
-I'm so disappointed!
-Shh!
Be sad quietly.
This fuckin' sucks.
I can't.
-Do you have a condom?
-Uh...
Wait, aren't you
on birth control?
It's
okay, just pull out.
Oh...
Fuck.
Fuck.
Just ask him.
Okay, but you
know Sinhala better,
-so maybe you should--
-You guys are buddies now.
Ugh, okay, um...
- Hey, Mohommed!
- Yeah?
Um, is there any way that
we could get to a pharmacy
nearby?
Are you sick?
Okay.
Uh, no, no, I'm not
feeling sick, but, um...
uh...
we just need some
medicine that, in the States,
we can get pretty easily,
but here, um, I'm not
certain we can get it.
Okay.
Um...
Okay, so in the States,
it's called the--
"the morning after pill."
It's basically when people...
have sex and then
there's an accident,
they can...
take it.
Um...
Mohommed!
Sorry, Mohommed, um,
we were having sex,
and Ben finished inside of me,
and now we need your help to
find someone who can
help us find drugs...
no baby.
Whoa, shit!
Where are you from?
Uh, New York.
The States.
- The States, yeah.
- Aha!
How do you feel in Sri Lanka?
Uh, it's beautiful!
- Nice, yeah!
- Love it here.
Okay.
What is your favorite movie?
Oh my gosh, uh,
I haven't seen a
movie in a long time.
Do you know Magic Mike?
Magic Mike?
Magic Mike?
That's
your favorite movie?
XXL, probably.
Okay,
guys, you stay here.
- Okay.
- Okay.
What is this place?
I don't know,
I've never been here.
- Oh, God...
- I'm sure it's fine.
Oh, God...
- Okay, you can go.
- Okay.
Um, hey, thanks, man,
for the, uh, help.
Why not 5,000?
Uh, yeah, why not?
-Yeah, thank you.
-Thanks, buddy.
Thanks.
Hey.
Hi.
Hi, good morning!
-Hi.
-Hi.
How are you two?
-Good.
-Doin' okay.
We've had a...bit
of a morning, but...
Okay!
All right, okay, so
where are you from?
Uh, we're from the
States originally.
-New York.
-But I-- I live here now.
-Oh, right!
-A New Yorker!
- Yeah.
- All right!
-New Jersey, actually.
-Ah, okay.
And, um, you're
on holiday or...?
I-- I work here
and he's--
Yeah, I'm visiting.
-Fantastic.
-Yeah.
Okay, so...
what can we help you with?
We're looking for the
morning after pill.
- Oh, right, Plan B?
- Plan B.
That's it, okay.
Do you think you
have something?
- I have a little bit.
- Oh, good.
I think it's Levitron,
something like that.
By the way, the one we've got
is really-- it's a legitimate
thing; it's from Germany.
It's the good stuff.
So, um, you guys
interested in anything else?
Um...
Molly, acid...
cocaine, maybe hash?
Um...
I think we're...good.
Yeah, yeah,
we're-- we're good.
-Okay.
-Oh, okay.
So, that will be,
um, 25,000, please.
-Rupees.
-Oh!
Yeah.
Okay, um...
I was like, "Oh, that's a
lot of money!"
-Do you have cash?
-Yeah, do you?
- I have some.
- We need cash.
- Okay, I mean...
- Cash is best!
Yeah.
Do you wanna split it or...?
Um...
Or you can Venmo me
and I can just get it.
-Uh...
-Yeah.
-Sure, yeah.
-Or I-- I'll get it.
Hey, thanks, yeah,
that's not enough.
Is that...?
Yeah,
that's-- okay, thank you.
- Ohhh...
- Thanks very much.
Thousand, not hundred.
Zeros.
Yes.
25,000, yeah.
Thank you, that's great.
Thank you, thank you.
We were both kind of
on the fence about it.
Uh, I was-- I was more into
it and she was less into it,
so...
And we decided we could still
lead a fulfilling life if we
did not have kids, so...
Are you fulfilled?
No.
But I don't think I would be
more fulfilled if I had a kid.
Okay.
And the world is going
to shit right now, so...
-I don't wanna...
-Yeah, I mean...
Bring somebody into it.
Sure, I mean, things are...
you know, they're
pretty bad, but...
they're not more fucked up
than for previous generations,
so...
I'm sorry, the Earth
is 100 percent dying!
They have proven the amount
of time that we have left.
- The economy is
totally fucked.
Only rich people
can afford childcare.
It's-- it's completely insane!
Yeah, okay, but people
are still having kids,
and they've always had kids.
I mean, every decade has had
something fucked up happening
in it, it's just a
different kind of fucked up.
I mean, if we lived
in the Middle Ages,
you know, everybody would
have the plague and be covered
in mud.
Okay, we do not live
in the Middle Ages,
and don't you wanna bring
your kid into a world that is
comfortable and warm and...
-Oh my God...
-Safe?
Yeah, I think we tend to
put too much stock into
safety and comfort.
And besides, you're the one
that said that the point of
life was suffering and pain.
Okay, I'm sorry, yeah, I
don't wanna wish that on
somebody else!
Do you wanna have kids now?
No!
No, I'm perfectly happy
with the decision we made.
I'm just saying,
in the modern age,
we tend to
overthink, like, everything.
I...
just don't really wanna have
this conversation right now.
Okay!
Fine!
Hm.
Tastes like mint.
Mm.
It's that good German shit.
Lemme in.
Ahh!
- Oh...
- Oh, no!
My turn.
Your turn, your
turn. You can get this.
Where are you goin'?
Right here.
Ooh, nice!
No-- uh, uh, uh, uh!
Hey, girl!
Hey!
You're looking so beautiful!
Aw, thank you!
It's 'cause I'm winning.
Go a little lower.
-A little lower?
-Yeah.
Okay.
- Here we go!
- Ohh!
Beautiful!
Beautiful, beautiful.
Shit.
Sorry...
Yeah!
-That's what I'm
talkin' about.
-Get in there.
That's what I'm talkin' about.
Yes!
Ooh, thank you!
'Scuse me.
-Whoo!
-Oh, yes!
I just took the pill, so we
should play it safe for a
couple days.
Okay, yeah, I got it.
Wait.
Hold, please.
-Bum-bum badum-bum
-Ohh, shit!
Um...
Do you have any lube?
I have Ayurvedic shampoo.
Let's gooo!
-Ooh.
-Oh!
Is it good?
Uh, I-- I don't hate it.
Oh!
Okay, so now would be
a good time to start, like,
-dirty talk or...
-Oh, okay, um...
-Whatever.
-Yeah.
Stick it in.
-I...did that.
-Right.
Um...fuck it.
Yeah.
Like that.
Okay, so, um, not
to be pedantic,
but you really gotta give me
something else to work with
-here.
-Don't tell me what to do!
Oh, mama!
Rrraow!
You think this is a bit?
It's not a bit.
Close your eyes.
Open your mouth.
Close your mouth.
Good.
You're listening.
Okay, um...
Tell me what you most desire.
Tenderness.
Tenderness?
That's pathetic.
You pathetic
little simp-ass bitch!
You can't even last more
than a minute inside of me.
Whoa, hey, hey, hey!
That's because you were
shaming me 'cause--
'cause I was jerking
off so much, all right?
-That's not--
-Shut the fuck up.
You think you're so
cool, with your hot music,
and your...
philosophical bullshit, but
it's all just a disguise for
how useless and
insecure you are.
Okay, gettin' a
little mean now,
so maybe cool it.
Um...
count to 10 and
then you can finish.
-One...
-In Sinhala.
Uh...
That's wrong.
Incorrect!
Start again.
Ahh, f--...
No, start again!
Ahh!
-One, two...
-That's English!
-Three...
-No, no, no! Sinhala!
Ah, fuck!
Uh...
Sinhala, Sinhala,
Sinhala, Sinhala.
No!
No, no, no, wrong
language, wrong language!
-Ahh!
-Sinhala, Sinhala, Sinhala.
Mm-hm.
No!
-Ahh...
-That's not even a word!
Uh...yeah!
It's beautiful, I love it!
From what I can tell.
The
nature and the...
- Yeah.
- The hikes...
Yeah, I mean, it kind of
reminds me of India in some
-ways.
-Mm.
Um, it's just a
really beautiful place to be.
-It's gorgeous.
-And the trees...
- Yeah.
- And the rocks...
The
trees and the rocks...
The jackfruit.
And the jackfruit.
There's so much of it
that reminds me of India,
but then it all, uh,
feels very different also.
The food is different,
the language is different.
I mean, they
speak Tamil but...
Not quite, though.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
And I also feel like people
know that-- I just thought I
would come here and
people would just sort of...
assume that I was
Sri Lankan or...
that I was an Indian
from India but, like...
everybody kinda knows
that I'm not--
that I'm just an American.
Or they know that
I'm not Sri Lankan.
You thought you'd
blend in a little more?
Yeah! When I'm in India,
they think I'm an American
anyways.
I don't know, I
guess it's like...
everywhere I go in the world,
I sort of stick out in some
way -- at least
in, like, Europe.
Hm.
And here, I
thought maybe I would...
fit in, or at least be
able to speak for Tamil,
even though I can't
really speak it that well.
Yeah.
Maybe when we go to-- if
we were to go to Jaffna or
- something, I would feel...
- Feel different?
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
What about you?
I mean, I-- not
the same, but...
I'm a white lady, obviously,
so no matter how at home
I feel here or how much I
know about the country or
how comfortable I am,
I'm never gonna be fully...
-an insider.
-Mm.
Yeah.
Must be very strange.
The dogs
are cute, though.
Yeah.
The dogs are everywhere.
- Lots of cute dogs.
- The dogs are the same.
Do they have as many
street dogs in India?
Yeah!
Oh, yeah!
They do.
- I'm gonna adopt a few.
- Okay.
I'm gonna come back to
the United States with six
- stray dogs.
- Great.
Watch out, Ernst.
I'm sure
Lubitsch will love that.
- Hello, Ben, sir.
- Mm.
- Suzanne, madame.
- Hm.
It's
good, very nice.
Are you married?
Oh, are we marr-- uh,
no, we're not married.
It's, uh-- we're-- we're
in a domestic partnership.
Mm-hm.
So, yeah.
Why
you not married?
Um...
it's...
There are so many people
in the world that, like,
aren't able to get
married, you know?
And it's like a-- sort of
an outdated patriarchal
institution that we
don't really feel like
subscribing to.
It's just-- it's
very political.
Wow.
Sir love,
madame love.
Why are you not married?
I mean, yeah, that's...
that's a good point, I guess.
I need your help.
I'm very sorry, but we're
in final delinquency on your
account.
According to the
terms of the contract,
you owe us 7,824 rupees.
We're no longer able to apply
a forbearance to the account.
What?
That...
I can't translate all that.
Can you...simplify it?
No, that's really complex!
Okay, what about, um...
"You're late on your payment?"
Uh...
Okay, s-- uh, she's
saying it's been, uh,
a really hard time
right now and that,
if you give her a little
more time and a little more
patience, she'll be
able to save and...
and get-- get it to you.
But the-- the
bank needs it now.
Um...
Okay, so...
what she's basically saying
is she'd like to give you the
money if she had
it, but she doesn't.
But also, what
don't you understand?
Seems like you're more
interested in the bank
than her interests,
and she only went to
the bank because of you,
so...
Hey.
Hi.
It's gonna be okay.
How is it gonna be okay, Ben?
I don't know,
you'll figure it out!
You're.
I'm just trying to meet with
this bank manager now that
we're going to Galle.
Hopefully he checks
his email on a Saturday.
Well...
Fuck!
What?
My phone just died.
Your phone just died.
Mohommed.
Enjoy!
Shorty got
low, low, low, low
Low,
low, low, low
Low, low, low, low...
Shorty got
them AppleBottom jeans
The boots with the fur
With the fur!
The whole club
was lookin' at her
She hit the flo'
Next thing ya know
Shorty got
low, low, low, low
Low, low, low, low
The baggy
sweatpants with the...
Shit!
Oh...
Is that...?
Shit.
All right.
Oh my
God, I'm sorry.
So sorry.
Thank
you for everything.
I wish we---.
Oh, thank you.
Uh...-.
- Sorry.
- The bus station is that way.
- All right.
- Okay.
All right,
thank you.
Yeah.
Would you be
opposed to a hotel day?
Not at all.
Thank you very much.
Wooowww!
Look at you!
That is a good fit, wow!
-Cool!
-You clean up nice!
Thank you very much.
I like that shirt.
Fun fact about this shirt:
this is made from vintage
-tablecloth...
-Ooh...
-So...
-Very fun fact!
-There's that.
-I love the embroidery.
Oh, thank you!
What'll you have?
Uh, probably a club soda.
-Club soda?!
-What are you drinking?
Uh, this is
Johnnie Walker,
red label.
Pew!
It's a bit...pedestrian,
don't you think?
You're dumb.
Uh, club soda, my good man.
-Thank you.
-Thank you!
Ahh...
- Yesss!
- Ah!
Wendy!
- Why are you running, Wendy?
- No!
Here's Johnny!
Come, Danny!
- Catch!
- Whoa, hey!
Hey!
I'll huff, and I'll puff,
and I'll blow your house down!
Is the bit done?
Uh, yeah, it's over.
It was pretty fun, huh?
That was pretty fun.
Sorry.
Oh my God!
What?
I got a meeting with the
head of Global Bank tomorrow!
Oh, hey, that's great!
Maybe you should...
we should celebrate, hm?
Mm, I have to brief this case.
Mm, or we could
just keep doing this.
Can we...
circle back to this?
Or we could
just stay in the moment.
Mm.
I would love to -- I really,
really would -- but this is a
big deal, and I just have a
responsibility to my clients,
you know?
You know, this
really isn't fair.
What?
Uh, you've sort of been...
prioritizing work
this whole trip.
That's not true.
Uh...
I went to Sigiriya
and Dambulla Cave...
with the driver.
Yeah, I finished up work so
that we could go have a nice
beach day the next day.
Ooh, yeah!
One day of great hangs, and
then it was back to work and
walking...
through the night.
I mean...
I don't know, it feels
like this trip actually isn't
quality time well spent.
Okay, I'm sorry that quality
time well spent is feeling
really great being
guilted into having sex.
Oh my God, this
is not about sex!
No, it's not.
I guess it's just about
making me feel guilty.
I'm not trying to
make you feel guilty,
I'm trying to
express my desire for you,
-sorry!
-You're so fucking selfish!
Yeah, right, I'm selfish.
I'm the one that left to
follow some misguided notion
of goodness,
and sacrificed everything
else in the process!
Oh, yeah, really
great work you're doing,
-by the way!
-Yeah.
Look, I'm sorry, I...
Look, I'm really sorry.
I was out of line.
Can you please just
get away from me?
Would you get off your
phone and fucking talk to me?
Okay, Ben, you just swing into
Sri Lanka and enjoy all of the
hospitality and the fun times,
but I am trying to do some
actual good, and I don't
know what you don't understand
-about that!
-Yeah, yeah, yeah,
where would these poor
people be without their
fucking neoliberal
white savior?!
Fucking colonizer!
Do you smell something?
Yeah.
Can you check to see
if the window's open?
Yeah.
Okay.
Oh, God!
Oh, God!
Thank you.
You already
found another room?
Yup.
Off to your meeting?
Yup.
- Good luck.
- Thanks.
Is there
anything you can do to fix it?
Okay, ma'am, give me one
second and I'll check it.
Sorry, ma'am, we can't
do anything for this.
We don't have the parts.
Okay, um, you can't
fix the screen or anything
like that?
At the moment, we don't
have anything for this.
Okay, um...
can I buy new one, then?
Okay, I'll give you.
-How about this one?
-Thank you.
That's good.
Can we transfer the contacts?
Sorry,
ma'am, we can't do.
- No?
- No.
Okay.
Um...
How much for this?
- You give me 4,000.
- Okay.
I got you some
things from the pharmacy.
Don't be mad at me!
I'm just vacation smoking!
Ha ha ha!
If you need me,
I'm in room 202.
Thank you.
I feel like this is the first
time I'm seeing you without a
phone in your hand
this entire trip.
Dude!
You know what I say:
if something's
already bad,
might as well
make it worse.
Scorched earth approach.
Yeah, well, you've
scorched it quite well.
I completely lost
my shit last night.
My behavior was
totally uncool,
and-- and...
unacceptable!
I am very sorry.
You said some of the most
horrible things I have ever
heard about myself.
And I know some of
that might be true,
but it really hurts
that you believe that.
How was your meeting?
Fine.
Maybe you should just,
like, delete everything.
Helpful
suggestion, Ben, thank you.
Okay...
Okay, uh...
Yeah, good night.
Oh, okay, okay, okay,
okay, okay, okay.
Last night...
were you...?
N-- no!
I thought maybe...you were.
No!
No.
Oh.
Glad we solved that.
How are you feeling?
I'm just tired.
How are you feeling?
Shitty.
Uh, look...
I've been thinking, um...
maybe it's-- it's time we...
Yeah.
I think we're done.
Um...
We can h-- handle the
logistical stuff when you
get back.
Maybe we could still
do New Year's together?
Since we're here.
Yeah.
That-- that could nice.
'Kay.
Bye.
Bye.
I'm Suzanne Hopper.
It's so nice to meet you.
Thank you-- thank
you, thank you,
thank you so much
for taking the time.
I know you're very busy.
Um...
Hello, hi-- oh,
sorry, can you hear me?
Uh, yes!
Uh, what's your name again?
Um, hi, I'm Suzanne Hopper,
I'm one of the loan officers
for Economic Integrity.
You are Suzanna, okay.
Really...
really nice to
meet you, Shehan.
Thank you again
for meeting with me.
It's so last minute.
I know that this
is a busy time.
I'm actually
currently away.
I'm just getting
ready for...something.
So, how can I help you?
I wanted to talk to you about
our end-of-quarter recoupment.
Given the economy right
now, everyone is struggling.
The total amount of debt
to be recouped is only
1,643,727 rupees,
which is about the
equivalent of 5,000
US dollars.
So...
I wanted to propose
a debt forgiveness.
This would give our clients a
change to get back on their
feet, get things together,
and really be able to pull
themselves out of this debt.
See, the problem is...
I'm a bank.
I'm a bank manager.
-Do you know what banks do?
-Yes.
We are not a
charity organization!
Explain to me
what you think I do.
Explain!
Well...
you're giving loans to
people, so you also have to
- understand--
- Mm.
I understand you...
Let me forget, Suzette...
Suzanne.
Let me tell you: the
problem is the economy is bad.
- Right.
- We can't just hand out money.
The best thing I can do
is give you a two-month
extension.
This is a favor that
I'm doing for you.
I have something to
worry about as well,
not just you!
Okay.
Excuse me.
Oh!
Sorry.
Thank you.
Madame, happy New Year.
Happy New Year.
- Thank you.
- Yeah.
Tonight
at eight o'clock,
Starship Troopers.
Only on Derana LK.
Suzanne?!
Uh, if you're in there, um...
Starship
Troopers is on tonight!
Thought you'd wanna know.
We now return
to our New Year's Eve movie,
Starship Troopers.
Johnny Rico...
Ben?
Ben!
Ben!
Beeeeen!
Hello?!
- Hello, madame.
- Hello!
-Hello.
-Hi, hi.
Hi.
Uh, I am looking
for my friend...
Yes.
-Ben Santhanaraj?
-Yes.
He's not, um...
He's in room 4-- 420.
Yes.
Ma'am, Mister Ben has
been taken to the hospital.
-What?!
-Yes, I'm sorry.
Is he dead?!
I don't think so.
Oh, God...
-What hospital?
-In Galle Cooperative
Hospital.
- In this way.
- That way?
-Yeah.
-Okay.
Jesus.
Hi.
I'm looking for
Ben Santhanaraj.
He checked in earlier today.
Visiting time
is over, madame.
Only family members.
But I'm his wife!
Okay,
all are good, okay?
Thank you.
Thank you.
-Hey!
-Oh my God!
Oh my God!
Oh!
Oh...
What happened to you?
I'm fine, I'm fine.
I'm gonna have a wicked scar.
-Are you drunk?
-No.
What happened to your face?
I was drunk, I'm
not drunk anymore.
Okay, have you been running?
Yeah, I looked
everywhere for you.
Aw, I'm so sorry.
-Is it--
-Oh! Don't.
-No, don't touch it.
-Does it hurt?
Yeah, a little bit.
I thought you were dead.
So did I.
Wait, I was gonna
tell you something.
What?
I saw Starship Troopers!
No!
It was on the TV in the hotel!
-Yes!
-Yes!
What'd you think?!
What'd you think?!
Okay, okay, okay.
It was actually this
very amazing satire of
-Neofascism...
-That's what I'm saying!
And the military
industrial complex!
-That's what I'm saying!
-It's so fucking good!
-It's so good!
-It's so good!
-And!
-And?
The guy gets his brain
sucked out by a bug!
Ohh, it was so gross!
Unbelievable!
It was so gross!
Verhoeven!
-Verhoeven!
-Incredible.
- Announces himself!
- I know.
It's unbelievable!
It's so good!
Also, I'm sorry, Johnny Rico?
-Well...
-Johnny Rico...
I know.
-Denise Richards?
-Oh my gosh...
-Come on.
-The casting's incredible.
Nobody shoots actors' eyes...
Like Verhoeven.
You love Verhoeven.
-It's sensual
yet bloodthirsty.
-Oh, it's so good.
- "Sensual
yet bloodthirsty."
- Yeah!
Okay, well, that's kind of
the entire movie, though!
I know!
But it's also, like--
it's such a beautiful
-human drama...
-Mm-hm.
-In the middle of all of that.
-Yeah!
It's an
incredible action film!
-Ugh!
-And, ugh! Ugh!
All of the action sequences
were just so fucking good.
Are you sure you
haven't seen it before?
-No, I promise!
-So weird!
I would have
remembered if I had seen it.
Huh!
We definitely didn't
watch it in Maine.
-I'm so glad you watched it.
-Me too.
Oh my God!
This is great, thank you.
Thank you!
Thank you.
Okay, take care.
Bye bye.
- Have a good one.
- Bye, thanks.
Wait, I thought they only
allowed immediate family
to visit.
I told
them I was your sister!
Wait, what?
They bought that?!
No.
Then I told them
I was your dad.
Daaamn, Daddy!
-You've got your passport?
-Yup.
Boarding pass?
Printed it off at
the business center.
I'm sad you have to go.
Me too.
You really
coming back in March?
-Mm-hm.
-You mean that?
Yeah, I mean that.
I have to tell you something.
Starship Troopers?
No, I took your advice.
I deleted the spreadsheet.
What?
I adjusted my
clients' repayment records;
I didn't really delete it.
Uh, when did I
tell you to do that?
At dinner the other night!
That was clearly a joke!
What if you get caught?!
It's a really
small amount to them,
and I don't think
they'll notice.
Wow!
That is some Robin Hood shit.
Do you really
think I'll get caught?
I mean...
you were...
doing what you
were supposed to do.
It means you're
really good at your job.
Fuck.
I'm sure it'll be fine.
If I were you, I'd...
maybe get a new job.
Yeah.
Happy New Year, Mohommed!
Happy New Year!
Hi!
Happy New Year!
Oh!
- Happy New Year.
- Happy New Year, brother.
Good to see you.
-What happened?
-Nothing, let's just...
- He's fine.
- Come on.
- Okay, give.
- Okay, okay, okay.
Oh, God...
How
was Galle, ma'am?
Uh...
It was, uh...
Action packed.
Oh, you gotta leave all
your reviews on Trip Advisor.
That's a lot of work!
Yeah, but it really
helps their business.
Okay, if you had to
rate this trip...
Mm...
How many stars
would you give it?
What's the rubric?
Just overall experience.
Okay.
Um...
eight?
8.5.
You're using a 10-point scale?
A five-point scale is
not inherently better!
Whoa, whoa, anything below a
five on a 10-point scale is
completely worthless!
Okay.
Look at all the issues we
would have to look forward to
in the long run.
Yeah.
-We dodged a bullet.
-Mm.
Oh,
thank you, Mohommed.
Thank you
so much, Mohommed.
I really appreciate it.
Come back to Sri Lanka, man.
Will do.
Thank you so much.
- Happy journey.
- Thank you.
-Okay.
-I'll be right back.
-It's that.
-There.
Yeah.
Okay.
So...
I guess this is it?
I guess so.
We had a
beginning, and an end.
-Nothin' in the middle.
-Mm-mm.
We were good travel
partners, though.
We were okay.
I think that's the
best you could ask for.
Is this goodbye forever?
-Yes, let's say it is.
-Okay.
Because that means when we
see each other on the street,
we can be really excited.
Oh, and we can think fondly of
each other from time to time.
Yeah!
If you ever
remember any of this.
I have an excellent memory!
-Bye.
-Bye.
Phew!
- Very hot.
- Yeah.
Yeah, wow.
- Very hot.
- Uh-huh.
Uh, where-- where
is she with the car?
This is the
blue one, the BMW.
Oh, okay, all right.
Uh...
- Hello, Ben.
- Oh, hi!
- Hi, I'm Priyanthi.
- Hi!
I'm
Suzanne's manager.
I have to send her now
to finish up some business
for me.
I'm really very
sorry, you know,
that she
couldn't be here today,
but don't worry!
She'll be here tomorrow.
Um, would you like some tea?
Uh, no, thank you, I'm fine.
Oh.
Uh...
He's asking
if you can speak Sinhala.
Oh.
Uh, no, uh, I can
understand Tamil.
Ah!
Ah, a little bit.
You look India.
Uh...I am Indian.
Hello!
Hi, baybo!
How's the
balance sheet looking?
It's...getting there.
There's still a little
more work to be done.
Yes, yes.
As long as it's not below
the reconciliation target.
We might
be a little below target.
Oh...
Okay, I'll have a
look at it tomorrow,
and then, we'll
take it on from there.
Okay, thank you.
Is Ben there?
Yes, he is!
He's here.
He claims he not
hungry, but I don't trust it.
Would you like to
speak with him?
Yes.
Okay! Ben?
Here!
Yrrrt!
Oh
my God, I'm so sorry!
No, no, no, no!
It's totally fine!
No,
I should have been there!
It's-- it's fine.
You know, Priyanthi
explained everything,
so what's
another day, you know?
I tried calling you.
Yeah, my phone's
been stuck on roaming.
Oh!
We'll get you a
local SIM card.
Uh, yeah!
Maybe.
How was the flight?
Um...
I drank some
complimentary wine
and caught up
on my rom coms.
But honestly, I couldn't
really do much of anything;
I just kept...
thinking about the moment
that I get to
see you and, uh...
I'm
so sorry that I couldn't
-be there.
-No, it's--
I feel terrible.
It's fine!
It's fine.
I just keep thinking about...
I don't know,
seeing you and...
kissing you and...
holding you and...
ugh!
There's so much...
pent-up tenderness and...
Uh, we should--
we should
probably get to sleep.
I can't wait to see you!
Yeah, same!
Um...
Get some good sleep.
I will see you in a few hours.
I can't wait...
though I suppose I'll have to!
Um...
Love you.
Love you too.
Are you done?
Hello?
Hello?
Hello?
Hello, sir?
Hello?
Sir, Pettah bus stand.
Pettah bus stand, this one.
Okay, thank you.
Okay...
I-- oh!
I come bearing gifts, okay?
Um...
from America...
I bring you Takis.
- Mm-hm.
- Um...
And from Sri
Lanka, duty free...
- Toblerone.
- My God!
It's a Toblerone.
- Is this a bit?
- It's a bit.
This is
highly impractical.
So do you, like...
always wear a mask now or...?
Oh!
I didn't even notice.
I...
That's a lot of
vacation reading.
Uh...
yeah!
Never know what'll
strike your fancy!
You're not
gonna read all of these.
It's okay if I don't
ready any of them.
I brought them;
that's the point.
I think the
point is you reading them.
Oh, hey, lemme
show you something.
Note the
condition of this book.
How would you
describe its condition?
- Like new?
- Practically mint.
"December 1996,
- uria cara, Suzanna..."
- Oh...
"Suzanna," "Suzanne," right?
"...The woman with
the serious eyes,
,
for
conversations past, present,
and future, and difficulties
yet to be faced and overcome,
here -- here -- another
companion to take with us
along the way.
I am most
grateful we met,
and glad, too, for the
incidental torments.
With appreciation,
,"
and then there's a name
here that I can't recognize
or make out.
That's nice!
I bought this book used, okay?
There's not a
crease in the spine,
none of the
pages are marked...
Mm-hm.
She didn't take her
companion along with her,
she didn't even read the book!
She sold it to The Strand for
30 percent off the list price!
Maybe she prefers Elaine May!
Even if you don't read
it, you gotta keep it.
Why?
Because it's meaningful.
It comes from the heart.
We don't
know their relationship.
Why do you automatically
take the side of this guy?
Okay, true, true.
I mean, it's way less romantic
to think about it like that.
What is romantic
about a textbook on a
known misogynist?
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
I don't...know about all that.
Dhamika has
got your room ready,
and lunch is also ready.
Ready when you guys are.
Um...
We're not staying together?
It's not really
okay for us to stay in the
same room.
But we're a couple.
But it's not proper.
Thank you.
- Ah...
- It looks great.
Papers? Here.
- Yes.
- Okay.
- This is just rice?
- This is just rice.
Yeah, this is
just rice with a little bit of
- fried onions and stuff.
- Oop!
It's
okay, no worries,
no worries, don't
worry about it.
Okay.
This was made very
specially for you, Suzanne.
Aw, thank you, Priyanthi.
Am I, uh...
am I-- am I doing this right?
You really have to
just mix it all in.
Oh!
So you take a little
bit of rice first...
Mm-hm.
And then keep adding
the curries one by one...
Okay.
And then just mix it
together the way she's doing.
So, what are you plans?
What are you guys
going to do now?
Uh, we really haven't had much
chance to chat about it yet.
Didn't you look at
the doc I sent you?
Oh, yeah!
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Definitely did.
Um...
There was
something about a cave...
We're gonna travel
mostly by train...
Okay.
We're gonna go through the
cultural Triangle Area...
Mm-hm.
Up to Jaffna, down to Ella,
and then end up at
Hikkaduwa for the beach.
Oh, that sounds
like a great plan!
- Yeah!
- Yeah.
Yeah, I just didn't
remember all the particulars.
I'm definitely down for
some beach hangs, though.
But maybe...
not for the whole time.
What's wrong with the beach?
I don't really swim.
You can swim.
I mean, I'm more
of a pool swimmer.
Well, if you had
looked at the doc,
we could have
done something else.
No, no, no, I'm good!
I'm-- I'm down for
whatever -- walking around,
checking out
some cool bars
and finding a
bookstore maybe...
All the books are gonna
be in Sinhala and Tamil.
Oh, but I can
understand Tamil.
You can't read Tamil.
Okay...
I'm sorry, Priyanthi, does
the brinjal have Maldives fish
in it?
It should not, but let me see.
I think there is.
Dhamika!
Dhamika!
Vegetarian!
Vegan!
V-E-G-A-N!
Vegan!
Oh--
No, no, it's...
totally fine.
No worries at all.
I'm sure he can turn up
something else for you.
Wait, wait, since
when were you vegan?
I don't know,
three months maybe?
You didn't-- you
didn't tell me that.
I'm really
good with the pol sambol.
I'm sure I did!
I'm pretty sure I'd
remember you telling me that.
I'm sure I told you.
-Is it an allergy?
-No.
-Is it a moral choice?
-Kind of?
So do you, like, love tea now?
Are you a tea drinker?
Black tea actually kind
of hurts my stomach so--
You know what?
You should try milk with it.
Oh, wait!
You're a vegan.
How come you
never told me that?
I didn't not tell you.
Well, you never mentioned it.
I just don't understand why
everyone makes such a big deal
about people's
dietary choices.
No, no, no, no, no.
It's not just about
a dietary choice.
It's a life decision.
Okay, look, I fully
support it, but...
it is significant.
I just didn't wanna eat
animal byproducts anymore.
I thought you quit!
I did!
These are just
vacation cigarettes.
Uh-huh.
-What?!
-Mm.
-After this carton, I'm done!
-Carton?!
Yeah, you can't just
buy a box at duty free!
Oh my God, that's a lot
of fucking cigarettes.
Mm...
But they're not
just any cigarettes...
they're Korean.
Yeah, what does that mean?
I don't know, they're
really fuckin' cool.
Come on...
I mean, yeah, it
looks like a cigarette.
- I'm really not addicted.
- Mm...
How's your cat?
You mean our
cat, once you're back?
That
is what I meant.
How's Ernst?
Lubitsch.
But his first name
is Ernst, right?
Yeah, I call
him "Lubitsch" now.
Mm...
I missed you.
I missed you too.
This is good.
10 days, just you and
me, quality time...
And then you'll be
back in February.
March.
Okay, for real this time?
For real.
What's the bug
situation like out here?
- There are bugs!
- Yeah?
Okay, but, like,
what are we talking?
We're talking, like,
Starship Trooper-level shit?
I don't know what that is.
Starship Troopers?
Verhoeven?
Caspar Van Dien?
Denise Richards?
"The only good
bug is a dead...?"
We watched it at
that hotel in Maine!
I've never seen that movie.
Oh my God, you have
a terrible memory!
I don't have a
terrible memory,
I've just never
seen that movie.
Okay, well, now...
We have a mission.
Oh, I think it is highly
unlikely that you will find
Starship
Troopers in Sri Lanka.
Well, I believe in miracles.
Suzanne?
Aah!
- Oh my God, h-- uh--
- Sorry.
You okay?
I'm fine.
Okay, I'm gonna...
Wait for you out there.
Sorry, yeah, okay.
Okay.
Dhamika?
Dhamika?
Prianthi?
-Oh, hi, baybo!
-Hi!
Um...
Would it be all
right with you...
Mm-hm?
If Suzanne stayed in my room,
or I could stay in her room,
if you don't mind?
I don't care!
It's perfectly
all right by me!
Okay.
-Dhamika?
-Okay.
Great.
Hey!
Ready?
Yeah.
Hey, check it out.
Books in English.
What'd you find?
Oh.
Is this us?
- Hello
- Hello!
What can I get you?
Uh, Americano.
Yes.
Uh, can I have a
espresso martini?
Vegan, please?
So you can try some.
I'm kind of doing a
dry thing right now.
Seriously?!
What?
I don't know, couldn't that
have waited until January?
Can't I be merry
without drinking?
I don't think so.
- Hello!
- Hi!
Uh,.
- Ah...
- Um...
Uh, do you have...
Starship Troopers movie?
English movie?
Yeah, this way.
Let me check.
- Whoa...
- This is great.
Cool.
Wow.
What?
-You would find that one.
-What is this?
What is that?
Karaoke?
-Excuse me.
-Oh!
Whoa!
Thank you.
You're welcome, sir.
- Wow.
- Oh my gosh!
It's a miracle!
- Crazy coincidence.
- No, no, no!
We talked about it yesterday,
and we found it today.
We went to a video
store and you asked if they
- had it.
- Yeah, and they did!
So...
Hey, do you
think that, uh...
the karaoke disc
is actually porn?
No, I do not think it's porn.
You know what I miss?
Well, what I regret, really?
What do you regret?
I don't know, that we didn't
really try sexting and stuff.
I did!
You rejected me.
What?!
I sent you a photo
and your response was:
-"Awesome," period.
-No, no, no, no!
That is the wrong tone!
It was actually like...
"Awesome!!"
Fuck!
Anyway, being alone is
not very conducive to sexy
feelings, so...
I don't know about you,
but I felt it on the regs.
How often did you do it?
Uh...
frequently?
What's "frequently?"
One to...several...
Several?!
Is that even enjoyable?!
After a while, it
just kinda hurts.
Wait, so if I called,
there would be a
very strong chance...
-Yeah.
-That you would
be jacking off?
If you called.
- Hey, I called!
I'm kidding, I'm kidding.
Okay, so...
what about you?
It's probably less than...
-several...
-Oh, definitely.
But, like, how often
were you jackin' it off?
Less than several.
Okay, but how much?
- Since being here?
- Yeah, obviously.
Zero.
-Never?
-Never.
Wait, wait, wait, so-- so
the last time that you...
-Yes.
-Was with me...
Yes!
I said yes!
- Back in the States, wow!
- You're smirking!
Wow!
Oh...
Well, look...
our long national
nightmare is over,
because...
I spoke to
Prianthi about the rooms,
and she's cool with it!
Ben,
you spoke to her?
Yeah!
And she doesn't care!
I never said that
she cared, I care.
Wait, do you...
do you not wanna stay with me?
No, Ben...
She's my boss,
I'm her employee,
you're my partner,
we're in her house.
-Oh, okay.
-Come on...
Well, I guess I
didn't really...
think about it like that.
But
look, I'll be good!
You cannot be
trusted, Mister Several.
I can be trusted, okay?!
I swear!
We won't...
do anything, I...
I just wanna be close to you.
Fine.
But no funny business!
Well, no...intentional
funny business.
What do you mean
"intentional?"
Well, look, if our business
just so happens to turn
funny...
Well, that's the
natural flow of things.
I-- I-- you know,
it can't be stopped.
It can be stopped!
Any funny business in the
house of my employer will be
brought to a swift
and orderly halt!
That was a fun day.
Yeah.
It was pretty fun.
I can't believe we
found Starship Troopers.
How's your jet lag?
All right.
Yeah.
I feel pretty awake.
I hope you can sleep.
I'm pretty beat.
Goodnight.
Are you hard?
It's
purely physiological.
Can you stop?
Sorry, I...
I just-- I can't force
it; I have to feel it.
Well, that's unfortunate...
that you don't feel it.
We've been alone a long time.
Yeah, well...
we're not alone anymore.
- Hey, guys!
- Hi!
So, what's on
the agenda today?
Oh, uh, well, Suzanne
got us tickets --
uh, train tickets --
to Kandy...
Oh...
And so we're gonna
settle in tonight,
and I think tomorrow morning,
we're gonna go to the...
Tooth Temple?
Temple of the Tooth.
Temple of the Tooth.
That's very lovely!
Kandy is a
beautiful place to be.
Um, so...
I took a look at these
accounts last night.
We are below our target.
Those targets
were set before the economy
collapsed.
Our clients'
circumstances have changed.
I know, but unfortunately,
we can't bend things here.
The bank is very
firm on their request.
We've got to
recoup 80 percent.
But we have a trip planned.
Perfect!
I have a driver here.
He's got his new van.
So while Ben is getting
his Sri Lankan experience,
and you all are
zipping this way, that way,
up and down
-- it's a small place,
you know, this country --
you could go have
a look at this.
Okay.
Hey, Mohommed.
Do you mind if I
play some music?
- Yeah.
- Okay.
Hey!
I made us a mixtape!
Suzanne!
-Suzanne!
-What?
Are you wearing headphones?!
Sorry, I...
thought I had
noise cancelling off.
Okay, this is very bad!
You're in-- you
have work brain!
Work brain is very
different from vacation brain!
Why can't my brain do both?
Well,
multitasking isn't a thing!
Look, the brain has very
different neural pathways
between work mode
and vacation mode,
so you have to decide
what you want to prioritize:
work brain or vacation brain!
Not everything is this
binary that you decide exists.
What are you even
listening to anyway?
Podcast.
A podcast?!
What's wrong with podcasts?
I don't know,
it's just, like...
information!
In 17th-century Germany,
10 percent of women were
astronomers.
I learned that in a podcast.
Okay, I guess that's
kinda cool, but...
like, what is it
doing for your soul?!
I don't know what
it's doing for my soul,
but it's interesting.
Can I just play us some music?
Mm-hm.
- Yeah?
- Sure.
Okay.
I like song "Low Low."
By Flo Rida?
Yup!
Uh, I-- I
don't think I have it.
Oh...
I'll just be a minute.
Hi.
I'm Suzanne Hopper, I'm
with Economic Integrity.
-Come in.
-Thank you.
Oh, geez!
Throw, throw, throw, throw!
Oh, shit!
Ow!
I'm sorry.
How'd it go?
Hilarious.
Can I read you something?
Mm.
"Optimism is not only a
false but also a pernicious
doctrine, for it presents
life as a desirable state
and a man's happiness
as its aim and object.
Starting from this, everyone
then believes he has the most
legitimate claim to
happiness and enjoyment.
If these do not
fall to his lot,
he believes that he
suffers an injustice.
In fact, he misses the
whole point of his existence,
whereas it is far more
correct to regard work,
privation,
misery, and suffering,
crowned by death, as the
aim and object of our life."
Isn't that interesting?
Yeah!
I mean, it's pretty bleak.
It's reality.
Reality is bleak.
Well, it doesn't
really inspire me to...
wake up and take on the day.
Don't you think if we
accepted our reality,
we would maybe be happier?
Uh...
Is work stressing you out?
Yes...
Okay, I have kind
of a weird question.
Scratch that; it
is pretty weird.
Um...
What...exactly...do you do?
-What?
-No, no, no.
I mean, obviously, I
know...what you do.
It's like...
NGO stuff.
Is that what you
tell people at parties?
Well, you don't talk about it.
I manage a series
of microcredit loans
for small female-owned
businesses.
It's onboarding,
basic training,
financial literacy
classes, though mostly,
I work out of the office doing
bookkeeping and digitizing
the ledgers.
Yeah, that's
basically what I thought.
But now, I am responsible for
recouping the loan payments.
So you're a debt collector?
Essentially.
Why don't you just quit?
I can't quit!
Why not?
I have a duty to my clients!
Well, uh...
okay, not to sound flippant,
but it sounds like your
clients would be okay
if you weren't performing
your duties.
Okay, but they didn't know
what they were signing up for.
They didn't sign
up forthis!
It's what the lenders prey on.
And if I quit, it just gets
kicked up to some bureaucrat
at the bank who doesn't
give a fuck about any of this.
Do you think I'm a monster?
No!
No, I swear, I don't.
It's just a shitty
situation for everybody,
and you're just
doing your job.
That's what the Nazis said.
Good morning!
Good morning.
You're up early.
Yeah, well, couldn't
sleep, it's Christmas Eve,
I'm going to my
partner's house,
I'm very excited.
Don't get your hopes up.
It's just a place.
Made you some coffee.
Thank
you, thank you.
You're the best.
-Ben.
-Yeah.
Come here.
Did you smoke?
No.
You smell like smoke.
Um...
I...maybe...had a quick puff?
Why did you lie?
Well, if I had
gotten away with it,
it really wouldn't have
made a difference so...
-That's not cool!
-Oh my God.
It's really
quite a harmless lie.
Okay...
I know these are your
vacation cigarettes...
But if smoking is your norm,
then maybe you can take a
vacation from that.
Hm?
Okay, yeah.
Yeah.
Aiyo!
Ayy!
Aiyo!
"Aiyo" mean "Oh
my God, very sad!"
Aiyo!
Oh, shit.
Oh, wow!
Okay!
We're doin' it!
- Okay!
- Wow!
-This is it!
-Ho-ly cow!
Wow!
Oh, you don't have to
take your shoes off.
Okay.
Uh...
And you don't have
to close the door.
Okay.
This is not the United States.
I'm just gonna
put on some water.
Wow...
Well, welcome to Sri Lanka.
Hey, thanks, man!
This is the bedroom.
Okay!
Sparkling clean,
spic and span.
Whoa, it's a fuckin' mess!
Jesus!
Okay, well, I would've
cleaned if I had known we were
stopping here.
Come on.
Is that a machete?!
Mohommed, do you
want tea, Samahan...?
Tea, please.
Thank you, madame.
Oh,
Ben, what about you?
Do you want tea or Samahan?
What-- what's the second one?
It's Samahan!
-It's...
-Uh...
Oh!
"Good for difficulties
in day-to-day work!"
Yeah!
I'll have, like, a
million of these.
Hey, come on!
I wanna go see that rock!
Let's go!
Let's go, let's go!
Cigarette?
May I have cigarette?
Oh!
Yeah.
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
-Thank you.
-Okay, okay, yep, yep, yep.
- Hey.
- Hey!
Okay, cave then rock?
Rock then cave?
I think rock then
cave is the preferred order.
Perfect, let's do it.
Um, I actually
would really like to just bust
through this bookkeeping...
And then I'll be totally done!
And then, it's just
vacation brain for the rest
-of the time.
-Okay.
- I'm sorry.
- Fine.
You really
shouldn't be working!
Okay, it's Christmas
Eve, it's a bank holiday,
right?
It's not
a holiday for me.
All right.
Fine.
Finish your work.
- Miss you.
- You guys have fun.
Okay!
Mohommed!
Just the two of us!
Let's go!
Bye, Mohommed!
Ben?
Guys!
-Merry Christmas!
-Merry Christmas.
Oh...
Okay, Mohommed,
this is for you.
- Merry Christmas!
- Merry Christmas!
Thank you so much.
No problem!
- Rip it, man!
- Get in there!
Rip it open!
- Yeah!
- Yes!
Wow, cigarette!
My goodness!
Wow, I love this one.
- Thank you so much, sir.
- No, thank you.
-Thank you.
-Thank you so much.
Okay, who's next?
Who's next?
You!
You, you!
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
- Oh, God!
- Heavy?
-Yeah!
-Jesus!
Uh, should I read the card?
-Yes.
-Okay.
Thank you.
Merry Christmas.
Ugh, okay, uh, I'm
gonna open this up!
Okay...
What is it?
- Don't shake it!
- Okay, okay.
Open, open, quick!
Oh...my...God!
It's a DVD player!
Starship Troopers, baby.
Yeah!
Oh my gosh!
This is amazing!
Where did you find this?!
Mm, I have my ways.
So cool!
Oh...
Sick!
Thank you.
Thank you.
-Oh, God...
-All right, my turn.
Uh, n...
-What?
-No, it's really stupid.
-Ben, come on!
-No, no, no, no!
-I wanna open my gift!
-No, it's not really that--
I'm sure it's fine!
I'm sure it's great.
Okay...
Um...
What the hell is this?
It's a...
bluetooth-enabled,
synchronized...
vibrator and
Fleshlight combo pack.
What?
Uh, it's a bluetooth-enabled,
synchronized vibrator
and Fleshlight
combo pack.
God, why is it open?
It-- I had to
charge it, that's why!
-I told you it was stupid.
-Uh-huh.
-It's really stupid.
-Yeah.
-Thank you.
-Wow, shit, man!
Jesus!
Hi, Suzanne, ma'am.
Thank you for a bed.
See you, Mister Ben...
Goodnight.
See you tomorrow. Bye!
- Bye, Mohommed!
- Bye, Mohommed!
- Sleep well!
- Sleep well!
Thanks.
-Okay...
-Now's the time.
-Here we go.
-This is the moment.
-1997...
-Mm-hm.
-Classic film...
-Mm-hm.
Starship Troopers
-- are you ready?
-This better be as good
as you say it is--
-I'm so excited!
'Cause it took me a long
time to track that thing down.
What the...?!
Shh!
Mohommed is sleeping.
Nooo!
"Region one?!"
Nooo!
Shh!
I'm so sorry.
Oh my God!
What the hell?!
We came all this way!
I don't think the
universe wants me to see
-Starship Troopers!
-Stoooop!
-I'm so disappointed!
-Shh!
Be sad quietly.
This fuckin' sucks.
I can't.
-Do you have a condom?
-Uh...
Wait, aren't you
on birth control?
It's
okay, just pull out.
Oh...
Fuck.
Fuck.
Just ask him.
Okay, but you
know Sinhala better,
-so maybe you should--
-You guys are buddies now.
Ugh, okay, um...
- Hey, Mohommed!
- Yeah?
Um, is there any way that
we could get to a pharmacy
nearby?
Are you sick?
Okay.
Uh, no, no, I'm not
feeling sick, but, um...
uh...
we just need some
medicine that, in the States,
we can get pretty easily,
but here, um, I'm not
certain we can get it.
Okay.
Um...
Okay, so in the States,
it's called the--
"the morning after pill."
It's basically when people...
have sex and then
there's an accident,
they can...
take it.
Um...
Mohommed!
Sorry, Mohommed, um,
we were having sex,
and Ben finished inside of me,
and now we need your help to
find someone who can
help us find drugs...
no baby.
Whoa, shit!
Where are you from?
Uh, New York.
The States.
- The States, yeah.
- Aha!
How do you feel in Sri Lanka?
Uh, it's beautiful!
- Nice, yeah!
- Love it here.
Okay.
What is your favorite movie?
Oh my gosh, uh,
I haven't seen a
movie in a long time.
Do you know Magic Mike?
Magic Mike?
Magic Mike?
That's
your favorite movie?
XXL, probably.
Okay,
guys, you stay here.
- Okay.
- Okay.
What is this place?
I don't know,
I've never been here.
- Oh, God...
- I'm sure it's fine.
Oh, God...
- Okay, you can go.
- Okay.
Um, hey, thanks, man,
for the, uh, help.
Why not 5,000?
Uh, yeah, why not?
-Yeah, thank you.
-Thanks, buddy.
Thanks.
Hey.
Hi.
Hi, good morning!
-Hi.
-Hi.
How are you two?
-Good.
-Doin' okay.
We've had a...bit
of a morning, but...
Okay!
All right, okay, so
where are you from?
Uh, we're from the
States originally.
-New York.
-But I-- I live here now.
-Oh, right!
-A New Yorker!
- Yeah.
- All right!
-New Jersey, actually.
-Ah, okay.
And, um, you're
on holiday or...?
I-- I work here
and he's--
Yeah, I'm visiting.
-Fantastic.
-Yeah.
Okay, so...
what can we help you with?
We're looking for the
morning after pill.
- Oh, right, Plan B?
- Plan B.
That's it, okay.
Do you think you
have something?
- I have a little bit.
- Oh, good.
I think it's Levitron,
something like that.
By the way, the one we've got
is really-- it's a legitimate
thing; it's from Germany.
It's the good stuff.
So, um, you guys
interested in anything else?
Um...
Molly, acid...
cocaine, maybe hash?
Um...
I think we're...good.
Yeah, yeah,
we're-- we're good.
-Okay.
-Oh, okay.
So, that will be,
um, 25,000, please.
-Rupees.
-Oh!
Yeah.
Okay, um...
I was like, "Oh, that's a
lot of money!"
-Do you have cash?
-Yeah, do you?
- I have some.
- We need cash.
- Okay, I mean...
- Cash is best!
Yeah.
Do you wanna split it or...?
Um...
Or you can Venmo me
and I can just get it.
-Uh...
-Yeah.
-Sure, yeah.
-Or I-- I'll get it.
Hey, thanks, yeah,
that's not enough.
Is that...?
Yeah,
that's-- okay, thank you.
- Ohhh...
- Thanks very much.
Thousand, not hundred.
Zeros.
Yes.
25,000, yeah.
Thank you, that's great.
Thank you, thank you.
We were both kind of
on the fence about it.
Uh, I was-- I was more into
it and she was less into it,
so...
And we decided we could still
lead a fulfilling life if we
did not have kids, so...
Are you fulfilled?
No.
But I don't think I would be
more fulfilled if I had a kid.
Okay.
And the world is going
to shit right now, so...
-I don't wanna...
-Yeah, I mean...
Bring somebody into it.
Sure, I mean, things are...
you know, they're
pretty bad, but...
they're not more fucked up
than for previous generations,
so...
I'm sorry, the Earth
is 100 percent dying!
They have proven the amount
of time that we have left.
- The economy is
totally fucked.
Only rich people
can afford childcare.
It's-- it's completely insane!
Yeah, okay, but people
are still having kids,
and they've always had kids.
I mean, every decade has had
something fucked up happening
in it, it's just a
different kind of fucked up.
I mean, if we lived
in the Middle Ages,
you know, everybody would
have the plague and be covered
in mud.
Okay, we do not live
in the Middle Ages,
and don't you wanna bring
your kid into a world that is
comfortable and warm and...
-Oh my God...
-Safe?
Yeah, I think we tend to
put too much stock into
safety and comfort.
And besides, you're the one
that said that the point of
life was suffering and pain.
Okay, I'm sorry, yeah, I
don't wanna wish that on
somebody else!
Do you wanna have kids now?
No!
No, I'm perfectly happy
with the decision we made.
I'm just saying,
in the modern age,
we tend to
overthink, like, everything.
I...
just don't really wanna have
this conversation right now.
Okay!
Fine!
Hm.
Tastes like mint.
Mm.
It's that good German shit.
Lemme in.
Ahh!
- Oh...
- Oh, no!
My turn.
Your turn, your
turn. You can get this.
Where are you goin'?
Right here.
Ooh, nice!
No-- uh, uh, uh, uh!
Hey, girl!
Hey!
You're looking so beautiful!
Aw, thank you!
It's 'cause I'm winning.
Go a little lower.
-A little lower?
-Yeah.
Okay.
- Here we go!
- Ohh!
Beautiful!
Beautiful, beautiful.
Shit.
Sorry...
Yeah!
-That's what I'm
talkin' about.
-Get in there.
That's what I'm talkin' about.
Yes!
Ooh, thank you!
'Scuse me.
-Whoo!
-Oh, yes!
I just took the pill, so we
should play it safe for a
couple days.
Okay, yeah, I got it.
Wait.
Hold, please.
-Bum-bum badum-bum
-Ohh, shit!
Um...
Do you have any lube?
I have Ayurvedic shampoo.
Let's gooo!
-Ooh.
-Oh!
Is it good?
Uh, I-- I don't hate it.
Oh!
Okay, so now would be
a good time to start, like,
-dirty talk or...
-Oh, okay, um...
-Whatever.
-Yeah.
Stick it in.
-I...did that.
-Right.
Um...fuck it.
Yeah.
Like that.
Okay, so, um, not
to be pedantic,
but you really gotta give me
something else to work with
-here.
-Don't tell me what to do!
Oh, mama!
Rrraow!
You think this is a bit?
It's not a bit.
Close your eyes.
Open your mouth.
Close your mouth.
Good.
You're listening.
Okay, um...
Tell me what you most desire.
Tenderness.
Tenderness?
That's pathetic.
You pathetic
little simp-ass bitch!
You can't even last more
than a minute inside of me.
Whoa, hey, hey, hey!
That's because you were
shaming me 'cause--
'cause I was jerking
off so much, all right?
-That's not--
-Shut the fuck up.
You think you're so
cool, with your hot music,
and your...
philosophical bullshit, but
it's all just a disguise for
how useless and
insecure you are.
Okay, gettin' a
little mean now,
so maybe cool it.
Um...
count to 10 and
then you can finish.
-One...
-In Sinhala.
Uh...
That's wrong.
Incorrect!
Start again.
Ahh, f--...
No, start again!
Ahh!
-One, two...
-That's English!
-Three...
-No, no, no! Sinhala!
Ah, fuck!
Uh...
Sinhala, Sinhala,
Sinhala, Sinhala.
No!
No, no, no, wrong
language, wrong language!
-Ahh!
-Sinhala, Sinhala, Sinhala.
Mm-hm.
No!
-Ahh...
-That's not even a word!
Uh...yeah!
It's beautiful, I love it!
From what I can tell.
The
nature and the...
- Yeah.
- The hikes...
Yeah, I mean, it kind of
reminds me of India in some
-ways.
-Mm.
Um, it's just a
really beautiful place to be.
-It's gorgeous.
-And the trees...
- Yeah.
- And the rocks...
The
trees and the rocks...
The jackfruit.
And the jackfruit.
There's so much of it
that reminds me of India,
but then it all, uh,
feels very different also.
The food is different,
the language is different.
I mean, they
speak Tamil but...
Not quite, though.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
And I also feel like people
know that-- I just thought I
would come here and
people would just sort of...
assume that I was
Sri Lankan or...
that I was an Indian
from India but, like...
everybody kinda knows
that I'm not--
that I'm just an American.
Or they know that
I'm not Sri Lankan.
You thought you'd
blend in a little more?
Yeah! When I'm in India,
they think I'm an American
anyways.
I don't know, I
guess it's like...
everywhere I go in the world,
I sort of stick out in some
way -- at least
in, like, Europe.
Hm.
And here, I
thought maybe I would...
fit in, or at least be
able to speak for Tamil,
even though I can't
really speak it that well.
Yeah.
Maybe when we go to-- if
we were to go to Jaffna or
- something, I would feel...
- Feel different?
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
What about you?
I mean, I-- not
the same, but...
I'm a white lady, obviously,
so no matter how at home
I feel here or how much I
know about the country or
how comfortable I am,
I'm never gonna be fully...
-an insider.
-Mm.
Yeah.
Must be very strange.
The dogs
are cute, though.
Yeah.
The dogs are everywhere.
- Lots of cute dogs.
- The dogs are the same.
Do they have as many
street dogs in India?
Yeah!
Oh, yeah!
They do.
- I'm gonna adopt a few.
- Okay.
I'm gonna come back to
the United States with six
- stray dogs.
- Great.
Watch out, Ernst.
I'm sure
Lubitsch will love that.
- Hello, Ben, sir.
- Mm.
- Suzanne, madame.
- Hm.
It's
good, very nice.
Are you married?
Oh, are we marr-- uh,
no, we're not married.
It's, uh-- we're-- we're
in a domestic partnership.
Mm-hm.
So, yeah.
Why
you not married?
Um...
it's...
There are so many people
in the world that, like,
aren't able to get
married, you know?
And it's like a-- sort of
an outdated patriarchal
institution that we
don't really feel like
subscribing to.
It's just-- it's
very political.
Wow.
Sir love,
madame love.
Why are you not married?
I mean, yeah, that's...
that's a good point, I guess.
I need your help.
I'm very sorry, but we're
in final delinquency on your
account.
According to the
terms of the contract,
you owe us 7,824 rupees.
We're no longer able to apply
a forbearance to the account.
What?
That...
I can't translate all that.
Can you...simplify it?
No, that's really complex!
Okay, what about, um...
"You're late on your payment?"
Uh...
Okay, s-- uh, she's
saying it's been, uh,
a really hard time
right now and that,
if you give her a little
more time and a little more
patience, she'll be
able to save and...
and get-- get it to you.
But the-- the
bank needs it now.
Um...
Okay, so...
what she's basically saying
is she'd like to give you the
money if she had
it, but she doesn't.
But also, what
don't you understand?
Seems like you're more
interested in the bank
than her interests,
and she only went to
the bank because of you,
so...
Hey.
Hi.
It's gonna be okay.
How is it gonna be okay, Ben?
I don't know,
you'll figure it out!
You're.
I'm just trying to meet with
this bank manager now that
we're going to Galle.
Hopefully he checks
his email on a Saturday.
Well...
Fuck!
What?
My phone just died.
Your phone just died.
Mohommed.
Enjoy!
Shorty got
low, low, low, low
Low,
low, low, low
Low, low, low, low...
Shorty got
them AppleBottom jeans
The boots with the fur
With the fur!
The whole club
was lookin' at her
She hit the flo'
Next thing ya know
Shorty got
low, low, low, low
Low, low, low, low
The baggy
sweatpants with the...
Shit!
Oh...
Is that...?
Shit.
All right.
Oh my
God, I'm sorry.
So sorry.
Thank
you for everything.
I wish we---.
Oh, thank you.
Uh...-.
- Sorry.
- The bus station is that way.
- All right.
- Okay.
All right,
thank you.
Yeah.
Would you be
opposed to a hotel day?
Not at all.
Thank you very much.
Wooowww!
Look at you!
That is a good fit, wow!
-Cool!
-You clean up nice!
Thank you very much.
I like that shirt.
Fun fact about this shirt:
this is made from vintage
-tablecloth...
-Ooh...
-So...
-Very fun fact!
-There's that.
-I love the embroidery.
Oh, thank you!
What'll you have?
Uh, probably a club soda.
-Club soda?!
-What are you drinking?
Uh, this is
Johnnie Walker,
red label.
Pew!
It's a bit...pedestrian,
don't you think?
You're dumb.
Uh, club soda, my good man.
-Thank you.
-Thank you!
Ahh...
- Yesss!
- Ah!
Wendy!
- Why are you running, Wendy?
- No!
Here's Johnny!
Come, Danny!
- Catch!
- Whoa, hey!
Hey!
I'll huff, and I'll puff,
and I'll blow your house down!
Is the bit done?
Uh, yeah, it's over.
It was pretty fun, huh?
That was pretty fun.
Sorry.
Oh my God!
What?
I got a meeting with the
head of Global Bank tomorrow!
Oh, hey, that's great!
Maybe you should...
we should celebrate, hm?
Mm, I have to brief this case.
Mm, or we could
just keep doing this.
Can we...
circle back to this?
Or we could
just stay in the moment.
Mm.
I would love to -- I really,
really would -- but this is a
big deal, and I just have a
responsibility to my clients,
you know?
You know, this
really isn't fair.
What?
Uh, you've sort of been...
prioritizing work
this whole trip.
That's not true.
Uh...
I went to Sigiriya
and Dambulla Cave...
with the driver.
Yeah, I finished up work so
that we could go have a nice
beach day the next day.
Ooh, yeah!
One day of great hangs, and
then it was back to work and
walking...
through the night.
I mean...
I don't know, it feels
like this trip actually isn't
quality time well spent.
Okay, I'm sorry that quality
time well spent is feeling
really great being
guilted into having sex.
Oh my God, this
is not about sex!
No, it's not.
I guess it's just about
making me feel guilty.
I'm not trying to
make you feel guilty,
I'm trying to
express my desire for you,
-sorry!
-You're so fucking selfish!
Yeah, right, I'm selfish.
I'm the one that left to
follow some misguided notion
of goodness,
and sacrificed everything
else in the process!
Oh, yeah, really
great work you're doing,
-by the way!
-Yeah.
Look, I'm sorry, I...
Look, I'm really sorry.
I was out of line.
Can you please just
get away from me?
Would you get off your
phone and fucking talk to me?
Okay, Ben, you just swing into
Sri Lanka and enjoy all of the
hospitality and the fun times,
but I am trying to do some
actual good, and I don't
know what you don't understand
-about that!
-Yeah, yeah, yeah,
where would these poor
people be without their
fucking neoliberal
white savior?!
Fucking colonizer!
Do you smell something?
Yeah.
Can you check to see
if the window's open?
Yeah.
Okay.
Oh, God!
Oh, God!
Thank you.
You already
found another room?
Yup.
Off to your meeting?
Yup.
- Good luck.
- Thanks.
Is there
anything you can do to fix it?
Okay, ma'am, give me one
second and I'll check it.
Sorry, ma'am, we can't
do anything for this.
We don't have the parts.
Okay, um, you can't
fix the screen or anything
like that?
At the moment, we don't
have anything for this.
Okay, um...
can I buy new one, then?
Okay, I'll give you.
-How about this one?
-Thank you.
That's good.
Can we transfer the contacts?
Sorry,
ma'am, we can't do.
- No?
- No.
Okay.
Um...
How much for this?
- You give me 4,000.
- Okay.
I got you some
things from the pharmacy.
Don't be mad at me!
I'm just vacation smoking!
Ha ha ha!
If you need me,
I'm in room 202.
Thank you.
I feel like this is the first
time I'm seeing you without a
phone in your hand
this entire trip.
Dude!
You know what I say:
if something's
already bad,
might as well
make it worse.
Scorched earth approach.
Yeah, well, you've
scorched it quite well.
I completely lost
my shit last night.
My behavior was
totally uncool,
and-- and...
unacceptable!
I am very sorry.
You said some of the most
horrible things I have ever
heard about myself.
And I know some of
that might be true,
but it really hurts
that you believe that.
How was your meeting?
Fine.
Maybe you should just,
like, delete everything.
Helpful
suggestion, Ben, thank you.
Okay...
Okay, uh...
Yeah, good night.
Oh, okay, okay, okay,
okay, okay, okay.
Last night...
were you...?
N-- no!
I thought maybe...you were.
No!
No.
Oh.
Glad we solved that.
How are you feeling?
I'm just tired.
How are you feeling?
Shitty.
Uh, look...
I've been thinking, um...
maybe it's-- it's time we...
Yeah.
I think we're done.
Um...
We can h-- handle the
logistical stuff when you
get back.
Maybe we could still
do New Year's together?
Since we're here.
Yeah.
That-- that could nice.
'Kay.
Bye.
Bye.
I'm Suzanne Hopper.
It's so nice to meet you.
Thank you-- thank
you, thank you,
thank you so much
for taking the time.
I know you're very busy.
Um...
Hello, hi-- oh,
sorry, can you hear me?
Uh, yes!
Uh, what's your name again?
Um, hi, I'm Suzanne Hopper,
I'm one of the loan officers
for Economic Integrity.
You are Suzanna, okay.
Really...
really nice to
meet you, Shehan.
Thank you again
for meeting with me.
It's so last minute.
I know that this
is a busy time.
I'm actually
currently away.
I'm just getting
ready for...something.
So, how can I help you?
I wanted to talk to you about
our end-of-quarter recoupment.
Given the economy right
now, everyone is struggling.
The total amount of debt
to be recouped is only
1,643,727 rupees,
which is about the
equivalent of 5,000
US dollars.
So...
I wanted to propose
a debt forgiveness.
This would give our clients a
change to get back on their
feet, get things together,
and really be able to pull
themselves out of this debt.
See, the problem is...
I'm a bank.
I'm a bank manager.
-Do you know what banks do?
-Yes.
We are not a
charity organization!
Explain to me
what you think I do.
Explain!
Well...
you're giving loans to
people, so you also have to
- understand--
- Mm.
I understand you...
Let me forget, Suzette...
Suzanne.
Let me tell you: the
problem is the economy is bad.
- Right.
- We can't just hand out money.
The best thing I can do
is give you a two-month
extension.
This is a favor that
I'm doing for you.
I have something to
worry about as well,
not just you!
Okay.
Excuse me.
Oh!
Sorry.
Thank you.
Madame, happy New Year.
Happy New Year.
- Thank you.
- Yeah.
Tonight
at eight o'clock,
Starship Troopers.
Only on Derana LK.
Suzanne?!
Uh, if you're in there, um...
Starship
Troopers is on tonight!
Thought you'd wanna know.
We now return
to our New Year's Eve movie,
Starship Troopers.
Johnny Rico...
Ben?
Ben!
Ben!
Beeeeen!
Hello?!
- Hello, madame.
- Hello!
-Hello.
-Hi, hi.
Hi.
Uh, I am looking
for my friend...
Yes.
-Ben Santhanaraj?
-Yes.
He's not, um...
He's in room 4-- 420.
Yes.
Ma'am, Mister Ben has
been taken to the hospital.
-What?!
-Yes, I'm sorry.
Is he dead?!
I don't think so.
Oh, God...
-What hospital?
-In Galle Cooperative
Hospital.
- In this way.
- That way?
-Yeah.
-Okay.
Jesus.
Hi.
I'm looking for
Ben Santhanaraj.
He checked in earlier today.
Visiting time
is over, madame.
Only family members.
But I'm his wife!
Okay,
all are good, okay?
Thank you.
Thank you.
-Hey!
-Oh my God!
Oh my God!
Oh!
Oh...
What happened to you?
I'm fine, I'm fine.
I'm gonna have a wicked scar.
-Are you drunk?
-No.
What happened to your face?
I was drunk, I'm
not drunk anymore.
Okay, have you been running?
Yeah, I looked
everywhere for you.
Aw, I'm so sorry.
-Is it--
-Oh! Don't.
-No, don't touch it.
-Does it hurt?
Yeah, a little bit.
I thought you were dead.
So did I.
Wait, I was gonna
tell you something.
What?
I saw Starship Troopers!
No!
It was on the TV in the hotel!
-Yes!
-Yes!
What'd you think?!
What'd you think?!
Okay, okay, okay.
It was actually this
very amazing satire of
-Neofascism...
-That's what I'm saying!
And the military
industrial complex!
-That's what I'm saying!
-It's so fucking good!
-It's so good!
-It's so good!
-And!
-And?
The guy gets his brain
sucked out by a bug!
Ohh, it was so gross!
Unbelievable!
It was so gross!
Verhoeven!
-Verhoeven!
-Incredible.
- Announces himself!
- I know.
It's unbelievable!
It's so good!
Also, I'm sorry, Johnny Rico?
-Well...
-Johnny Rico...
I know.
-Denise Richards?
-Oh my gosh...
-Come on.
-The casting's incredible.
Nobody shoots actors' eyes...
Like Verhoeven.
You love Verhoeven.
-It's sensual
yet bloodthirsty.
-Oh, it's so good.
- "Sensual
yet bloodthirsty."
- Yeah!
Okay, well, that's kind of
the entire movie, though!
I know!
But it's also, like--
it's such a beautiful
-human drama...
-Mm-hm.
-In the middle of all of that.
-Yeah!
It's an
incredible action film!
-Ugh!
-And, ugh! Ugh!
All of the action sequences
were just so fucking good.
Are you sure you
haven't seen it before?
-No, I promise!
-So weird!
I would have
remembered if I had seen it.
Huh!
We definitely didn't
watch it in Maine.
-I'm so glad you watched it.
-Me too.
Oh my God!
This is great, thank you.
Thank you!
Thank you.
Okay, take care.
Bye bye.
- Have a good one.
- Bye, thanks.
Wait, I thought they only
allowed immediate family
to visit.
I told
them I was your sister!
Wait, what?
They bought that?!
No.
Then I told them
I was your dad.
Daaamn, Daddy!
-You've got your passport?
-Yup.
Boarding pass?
Printed it off at
the business center.
I'm sad you have to go.
Me too.
You really
coming back in March?
-Mm-hm.
-You mean that?
Yeah, I mean that.
I have to tell you something.
Starship Troopers?
No, I took your advice.
I deleted the spreadsheet.
What?
I adjusted my
clients' repayment records;
I didn't really delete it.
Uh, when did I
tell you to do that?
At dinner the other night!
That was clearly a joke!
What if you get caught?!
It's a really
small amount to them,
and I don't think
they'll notice.
Wow!
That is some Robin Hood shit.
Do you really
think I'll get caught?
I mean...
you were...
doing what you
were supposed to do.
It means you're
really good at your job.
Fuck.
I'm sure it'll be fine.
If I were you, I'd...
maybe get a new job.
Yeah.
Happy New Year, Mohommed!
Happy New Year!
Hi!
Happy New Year!
Oh!
- Happy New Year.
- Happy New Year, brother.
Good to see you.
-What happened?
-Nothing, let's just...
- He's fine.
- Come on.
- Okay, give.
- Okay, okay, okay.
Oh, God...
How
was Galle, ma'am?
Uh...
It was, uh...
Action packed.
Oh, you gotta leave all
your reviews on Trip Advisor.
That's a lot of work!
Yeah, but it really
helps their business.
Okay, if you had to
rate this trip...
Mm...
How many stars
would you give it?
What's the rubric?
Just overall experience.
Okay.
Um...
eight?
8.5.
You're using a 10-point scale?
A five-point scale is
not inherently better!
Whoa, whoa, anything below a
five on a 10-point scale is
completely worthless!
Okay.
Look at all the issues we
would have to look forward to
in the long run.
Yeah.
-We dodged a bullet.
-Mm.
Oh,
thank you, Mohommed.
Thank you
so much, Mohommed.
I really appreciate it.
Come back to Sri Lanka, man.
Will do.
Thank you so much.
- Happy journey.
- Thank you.
-Okay.
-I'll be right back.
-It's that.
-There.
Yeah.
Okay.
So...
I guess this is it?
I guess so.
We had a
beginning, and an end.
-Nothin' in the middle.
-Mm-mm.
We were good travel
partners, though.
We were okay.
I think that's the
best you could ask for.
Is this goodbye forever?
-Yes, let's say it is.
-Okay.
Because that means when we
see each other on the street,
we can be really excited.
Oh, and we can think fondly of
each other from time to time.
Yeah!
If you ever
remember any of this.
I have an excellent memory!
-Bye.
-Bye.