Best F(r)iends Volume 1 (2017) Movie Script

[music playing throughout]
[birds cawing]
[hearse engine revs]
[gate rattles]
[door whines]
[tray screeches]
Are you going
to stand out there,
like a Statue of Liberty?
Come on, I need your help.
I need a hand.
[gate rattles]
[gate slams shut]
Not too close, okay?
He may bite you.
to my paradise, huh?
Yes, oh, your... [chuckles]
I'm so sorry
about your family.
I cannot help you
with ninjas or karate.
But guess what?
You know what?
I can give you a job.
Come on, help me with this.
Come on.
Slowly, slowly,
slowly. Slowly!
[water dripping]
Don't worry, ninja man,
you are safe here.
You will now meet my friend,
Mr. Lester Green,
a victim of robbery
in grocery store.
He took bullet for his wife.
He saved his wife.
And I have to give him
beautiful face.
I cannot send him
to paradise as a monster. No!
I have to change this. I have
to give him beautiful face.
Yeah, I will do that.
The face of Cary Grant
or James Dean.
That's what he needs.
What do you think?
- Yes?
- Mm-hmm.
Don't be scared, ninja man.
I need your help.
Pass me the-the middle one.
Yes. Come on.
Come on.
Pass me this little dish
there. Come on.
Yes. Right here.
[tooth clatters]
Please put this back.
We love you, Mr. Lester.
When you arrive in paradise,
please send us
a little message.
A little message.
[teeth rattling]
You like the gold?
Yeah, it's beautiful, is it?
It's real pure gold.
I collect all
these human pieces.
And then, guess what?
Every six months,
company show up, pick up,
and-and it's a tragedy,
because they throw away.
But guess what?
I have a little secret.
Yeah, I do.
I have some stashed
too as well, so...
Yeah. But anyway, put this away.
Come on.
We have to go back to work.
Come on.
[tooth clatters]
[vocalizing eerily]
Close your eyes.
It doesn't work when you
don't close your eyes.
[vocalizing resumes]
Mind, body, spirit.
I give you face of Jesus,
King of Man.
What do you think
about that?
Looks good, huh?
Here you go. Wow.
I see you every day on the
bridge, and with big sign,
and then I-I...
You know, to be honest
with you, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry for you. It makes
me so sad, you know?
Guess what?
I give you work today.
What about
a little work tonight?
I pay you, and you have
a little money
for a little cocoa
or something hot.
Yes? Okay,
I know you're mute.
It's okay,
don't worry about it.
We have to move
three more bodies, okay?
The next one
is very brutal.
Oh, man! Somebody
push him from tree.
He's a... he's a midget,
tiny little thing.
We have to do something special
for him for funeral, okay?
He can be Marlon Brando
or Tupac Shakur.
Or something different.
We'll see. Okay?
See, I have to create
something here. Yes?
I know tomorrow
you'll be talking.
I know that already.
[zipping bag close]
Hey. You have bloody t-shirt.
Take this one.
I brought you also a beanie and jacket.
Here you go.
Clean up yourself, you
look like homeless person.
Come on.
Let me give you pay here.
You earn it.
Do you need a ride home?
Do you have a place to stay?
How is your family? Huh?
Okay, have a nice one.
[Nice Legs' "Holy Night"
I've made a few mistakes
This year
Meet me, please
Where the lights are bright
I'll make things right
I've been bad
I've got a good excuse
I don't think
You think of me at all
But Christmas I'll be there
I've been bad
I've got a good excuse
Meet me there
Underneath the tree
We'll find
our memories there
We'll find
our memories there.
Gold? I heard it's going up.
I sold mine!
[continues laughing]
[papers rustle]
[clears throat, coughs]
Hello... hello.
Hey, hey, it's me from the...
from the other night.
I... I forgot...
I forgot my-my bag. Um...
My black... my little bag.
It's a black thing.
And, uh...
and then maybe I can...
Can I... I can...
can I help you? I...
Can you help...
Can you give me a job?
I'm not dangerous.
I-I'm just... I...
I'm just hopeless
at this-at this time.
If you just let me help you, I'll
work for an hour. I'll work for free.
And if you don't like
what I do,
I'll get the hell out
and I'll fucking split.
But if you do like it, maybe
you can give me a little job.
Like you say, right?
Oh, Marisa...
It's all in the past.
We got this.
[inhales deeply]
[dog barking]
- Whoa!
- [trash clatters]
You cannot break me. You
cannot break me. Okay?
- Who are you?!
- It's me, from the other night.
From the other night.
The... the...
- Ninja. Ninja man.
- Yeah. Yeah.
You can talk.
You can talk.
So where is your beard?
What happened to your beard?
You don't have it. You shave it.
You look better.
So what brings you
here to my office?
Well, I forgot
my-my bag.
- What color?
- It's black. Small bag.
- Black? Are you sure it's black?
- Yeah, it's black.
Yeah, it's black.
You know what?
Maybe it was this one?
- No, that's not it.
- No. No.
- Is this it?
- Yeah.
Here you go.
Um, I-I-I need help.
- What kind of help?
- Can you help me? Can I work for you?
What kind of qualification
skills do you have?
- Well, I do...
- Communication, I meant.
I worked as a janitor. I can...
I can clean. You know?
- I can stack stuff for you.
- Everybody can clean.
- I see these coffins.
- I don't think so.
- No, I can help you.
- I don't think so.
- I can bring the trash out.
- You know what? I give you advice.
- Go back to school.
- I don't... I don't need school.
School is not what I'm looking for.
I need a job. I need help.
Let me help you.
I'll work for free.
You help me or you want
me to help you?
I can help you clean. I can
help you organize your office.
- So you need my help?
- I need a job.
- Yes or no?
- I need a job.
- Do you need my help, yes or no?
- Yes. I need a job.
So why you hesitate?
I need your help.
Just give me an hour
and I'll work for free.
Okay, follow me.
[spraying noises]
[contents rattle]
Ninja man?
Come on, where are you?
Hey! Ninja man!
- [gasps in disbelief]
- [bag thuds]
[muffled] I made it last night.
Just for fun.
Can I have it?
Sure you can have it.
[chuckles] It's you!
Here you go.
You are a guest here.
You have special access.
You can have it,
it's a gift for you.
I can't believe it, this is...
you're an incredible artist.
But you know,
I'm sad tonight.
Mr. Lee is gone to paradise.
You know what we should do? We should
have Chinese food in his honor.
He was very kind, kind,
you know, Chinese man,
Can you imagine?
Chinese usually are
very selfish, you know?
But who cares?
He was special.
Very special guy.
Very special Chinese person.
Let's have Chinese food.
Cheers to Mr. Lee
And my new friend,
Ninja Man.
Ninja Man
Cheers to Mr. Lee
Cheers, hey!
- Cheers. Yeah.
- Yeah, Mr. Lee.
Yeah. Sorry.
- [paper rustles]
- [Ninja Man] Ahem.
So tell me, what-what-
what is your real name?
Is it big secret
or something?
- You cannot tell me?
- Oh, Jon.
- Jon!
- Jon is my real name.
Jon! [laughs]
This is ordinary name.
Pretty nice. Pretty nice.
What are you...
You're a doctor?
No, I hate doctors.
I'm a specialist.
I help people. My goal
is to make people happy,
especially when they die.
I give them new faces.
I'm still in business.
Who is this woman?
She's beautiful.
Long, long time ago,
they find her in the park.
Two different pieces.
And... it was a tragedy.
She used to want to be
a big star.
She won a beauty pageant.
They never find
the killer.
Elizabeth was a big tragedy.
You know what?
I want to cry.
Each time I think about it,
I want to cry about it.
Where did this happen?
It was a tragedy
in Los Angeles.
- Why are you asking this question?
- [sighs]
- It was a long time ago.
- So is this...
Is this what inspired
all this? The face masks?
No, no, not at all.
I inspire myself.
I make people happy.
That's my goal in life.
You know, corporate
try to close me down,
but people understand that
I do something good here.
So, hey, Jon,
what's your real job?
I mean, look at you. I see always your bag.
Is your bag there?
Oh, yeah, it's right there,
next to you.
Are you working
in a parking lot?
Or selling drugs?
Or maybe a little prostitution
on the street, huh? Mm?
- What do you do?
- Oh, I'm... I'm kinda new in town.
- Just feeling it out.
- Oh, you are a drifter?
- Wow! A drifter?
- Yeah, well...
In and out. In and out, huh?
Yeah, well,
I worked in the Army.
Well, how was it?
Army? I don't know. I was
hoping to find some direction,
- and make friends, but it didn't work out.
- And what happened?
It just didn't work out.
So what do you
want to be? Hm?
What do you want
to be, Jon?
- Mm?
- Um, I... I...
I guess I hope to be me.
I see your eyes.
Your eyes so sad, Jon.
What do you worry about? We have
Chinese food. We celebrate. We live.
Why don't you live,
Jon?! Live!
Live, live, live, live!
I'm not pushing you, but you can
stay here if you like. You know?
- [stammers] I... um...
- Oh, do you...
I know some people on the east side.
I have a place.
[stammering] Do you... Do you
need a ride or something?
I'm-I'm okay.
[printer whirring]
[train rattling]
[music playing over speakers]
[woman] Jon?
Dr Surtain.
You look
pretty banged up.
What can I
help you with?
[music playing]
Can you lift harder?
I mean, all my weight
is right here, not there.
Just go straight.
Straight, straight, straight.
Watch what you are doing.
What are you...?
- [coffin thuds]
- Shit, damn it!
Sammy Jr.,
I'm so sorry!
Baby, I'm sorry!
I'm sorry.
What did you do to him?
- [train crossing bell ringing]
- Now he cannot sleep.
Just get your side.
Get the other side.
- Don't talk to me like that, man.
- Hold on, just balance it.
[both grunting]
Up... Up!
Go straight. Straight.
[grunting with effort]
Oh! I cannot do this
Ah, man.
Come on.
Do you have a girl
or something?
Nah, I'm just...
just doing my own thing.
But how about you?
Do you have a family?
Not at this time.
You know...
is hard sometimes,
but it's easier
than losing someone.
Do you understand?
You know, I was thinking...
maybe we could hang out
You know, outside
of this place.
Right? Like friends.
Well, I have news
for you.[chuckles]
Once a year,
I go to Vegas.
Open road.
Golden Nugget.
Forget the world, man.
Have groovy time.
- Spend some moolah. You want to go?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah!
- When are you thinking?
- Um... tonight!
- Tonight?
- Yeah!
- All right, yeah, let's do it.
- Let's do it, man.
- How are we going to get there?
- By car, what do you think?
- All right.
- You don't have to pay for anything.
- [chuckles] Yeah. Let's go. I'm ready.
- Okay, let's go.
[Jon chuckling]
[music playing]
[crickets chirping]
[Jon] Oh, I love the book
Of Mice and Men.
Have you read
that book?
- Yeah, friendship.
- Yeah?
I always...
I don't know,
I always saw myself in Lenny
and George, you know,
these two people just...
wanting to live
off the fat of the land
and have a place
to call home.
- The feeling is friendship, huh?
- Mm. Yeah.
You know, this is the... this is
the first time I've felt alive
in a long time, and...
you know, I almost forgot
what it felt like.
- It's all thanks to you.
- Mm.
Guess what?
Do you want to be
my partner? Business partner?
- What? Business partner?
- Yeah, business partner.
I can give you keys
and you can go in and out.
I-I would love that.
- Mm.
- Yeah.
- Yes? Give me five.
- Yeah! Yeah.
[grunting with effort]
- Do it again.
- Yeah. [groans]
You're a little clumsy today.
Yeah. Oh, it's cold.
- [Harvey] Oh.
- It's cold.
- Look at the stars.
- Being out here
just reminds me of my mom,
you know, before...
- before she died. She would...
- She died?!
- When?
- Oh, years ago.
Well, you say
like it's recent.
- No, it was years ago, but...
- Sorry about that.
Yeah, just when I look up,
I think about, like,
she would take me...
she'd take me
to the Observatory,
and... I don't know...
Like, she would always want
to get me involved in nature.
[exhales sharply]
I promised her
that I wouldn't end up
- like my father.
- Promise what?
She wanted me
to finish college,
and I... I totally
dropped the ball.
- Yeah.
- I haven't made good on anything, and...
you know, my dad, he was a
bum, you know? And he...
he lost our house
and he disappeared.
And I've just been... I've just
been bouncing around ever since.
Hey, don't wo...
Don't worry about it.
She's up there, look!
In the sky!
Hello! Hello!
Your son is here
Hello! Hello!
She's very proud of you.
She's out there.
You see?
She's very proud
of you, Jon.
Very proud of you.
Hello? Your son is right here, yes.
You see?
You don't want to say hey?
Hello. Hi, hi, hi.
She's proud of you, yes.
She's proud of you.
- You think?
- Yes.
- How would you know?
- I can feel.
[fuse crackling]
Are we ready to go?
[Jon] Yeah, I think I'm
finally ready to go back.
"Harvey, I want to tell you
about something that I did.
The week before Vegas,
I stole two bags of gold teeth
from your storage room
and I sold them for money.
I feel awful about it and I
didn't know how to tell you."
"But the good news is,
I think I found something,
something that can help
both of us
and I want to bring you
in on it."
"Your friend, Jon."
So, I hate to be the one
to break it to you,
but we are closing up.
Where are you from?
Arizona. You?
Um, complicated question,
but I'd go with, uh,
Central-Central Cali.
What's your name?
Uh... Jon.
Jon. Traci.
Nice to...
nice to meet you.
So what are you doing
in L.A.?
Um, I'm kind of in the...
in the gold business.
"The gold business."
Okay, that's a new one.
- [laughs]
- I never heard that before.
It's kind of going well.
- Good.
- Yeah. Um...
Keep it.
my shift's up,
so if you want to tell me
that long story, I got time.
- Do you want to take a walk?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Sure. Yeah.
Well, thanks
for walking me home.
It was fun.
I had a nice time.
You're interesting.
- You want to get coffee?
- Right now?
No, it's midnight!
I meant another time.
I'd love that, yeah.
[giggles] Okay.
[door squeaks]
- Good night.
- Night.
Jon, is everything okay?
Well, you didn't show up
last night.
Yeah, I was out late.
Yeah, but the office
was not ready.
And this morning... I
had to clean up today.
Sorry, I... I just...
met a girl.
A girl?
Um, she's...
yeah, she's awesome.
- Do you see the stars? Mm?
- Yeah.
I'm happy for you.
But look.
I rely on you.
Okay? You have to show up
for work here, you know?
I cannot do you work.
It's not right,
is it? Huh?
I apologize, it won't...
it won't happen again.
Well, we have new order.
A clown family. I need your
assistance right here.
So the guy kill
himself. Okay?
And by the way, they request
that you don't touch anything.
Just let it go
until-until funeral, okay?
You understand?
Don't touch anything.
[sighs] Poor guy.
If you look at the X-ray...
look it.
- You see the candle?
- Mm-hmm.
- He swallowed candle. He kill himself.
- How sad.
And the second candle, put in his ass.
What about that?
- [Jon] What? Oh, man!
- Yeah!
[Harvey] This entire
family so weird.
- Clown family? Wow!
- Clown family?
- [Jon] All of them clowns?
- Yeah, they're weird like hell.
You know,
we should celebrate.
Like, eat, uh, cake,
- Okay.
- Like, uh... sorbet, or...
I'm going to finish
cleaning the coffins,
and then let's do something
for clown man tomorrow night.
Okay, clown man
tomorrow night.
But guess what? I have
something for you.
- Keys for entire place.
- Oh. Thank you!
Okay, go to work!
College was good, I mean...
Something was just
kind of missing, so...
I originally wanted to be in
Colorado, but I ended up here.
What's in Colorado?
Colorado? What's not in Colorado?
Are you kidding me?
They have the most
majestic mountains
you'll ever see.
Freshest air
you'll ever breathe.
The waterfalls
are incredible.
- [chuckles] - And, like,
the whitest Christmases.
Oh, my gosh!
Have you ever had
a white Christmas?
Well, no. I never have.
[coin clatters]
[line ringing]
Andrei, hey,
this is Jon.
Dr. Surtain gave me
your number.
Yeah, I sold him
some dental scrap
and he thought you might be
interested in, uh, in what I have.
I have... I have tons.
I have bags...
bags of, uh,
bags of stuff.
A whole storage unit full.
Well, my partner,
uh, he runs a morgue, so...
Yeah, um...
Yeah, I can do tonight.
It's over, uh,
it's over on the east side.
It's, uh,
6200 Valley Boulevard.
How much?
Yeah, yeah,
I'll be there.
I'll be there. All right, I'll see you...
see you a little bit later.
Yeah, no problem,
thank you.
You can profit from it too, so I
didn't really steal from you.
Uh... Oh, just say
the truth. [mumbles]
Um, you know, I think...
I think this could be something that
could help both of us, you know?
Hey, Harvey, I want
to tell you something.
This fucking sounds...
Harvey, yeah, I want
to tell you something.
Yeah, the week
before Vegas, um,
you know, I kind of... I kind
of took something from you.
Uh, yeah, I was going through
your-your storage and I fell down,
and I saw these...
Just be honest.
Just tell him the truth.
[hearse door opens]
Jon, I give you keys so you can
work like a partner, right?
What are you doing here?
You look like
a homeless person.
Read this.
- You became writer now?
- It'll explain everything.
Is this real?
I was desperate and I...
I made a mistake.
Jon, you steal from me.
You steal from my friends.
You sell body parts
on the black market.
- Why you doing this? Why?
- Come on.
Come on.
It's not like that.
I found something, all right? It's
a legit industry. This thing...
- It can help us.
- Legit, not legit.
Yu know, I want you to just leave now.
Give me the keys back.
Okay? I don't want
to work with you.
Come on, I-I have
nowhere to go.
Whose problem is it?
It's my problem?
This can really help you.
All right? You have a ton of dental
scrap sitting in your storage.
And it's just
collecting dust.
I've been wanting to tell you
since we got back from Vegas,
and I...
I haven't had a chance.
You met the girl.
That's okay with me.
Okay? But look
at yourself now.
You look like a zombie.
Your eyes pop out.
Okay? Mark my words.
It will not end up
well for you, okay?
[mocking laugh]
It doesn't look real, anyhow,
you know, for your information.
But what to do with you?
You tell me.
I have a contact, all right?
His name is Andrei.
Now you invite criminals
to my office.
No, he's not a criminal. He
runs the refinery. All right?
He wants to come here and he
wants to look at your scrap.
And if he likes it,
he'll buy everything
and give you maybe
a lot of cash.
How much?
I don't know until he comes
here and looks at it.
Today is not my day.
You can make money off of this.
You can benefit.
All right? Just, please.
All I'm asking you...
just give it an hour.
Let him come here.
Oh, Jon.
You know what? All right,
all right, all right.
We will have, uh, meeting,
okay? We see what happens.
But Jon, when you
end up in jail,
I will not
rescue you, okay?
The only thing
what I can do,
I can send you
few oranges.
Tu comprends la vie?
- You got that?
- I got it.
- Here. Keep it.
- Thank you. Sorry.
[doorbell buzzing]
Who are you?
Who are you?
Are you Jon?
No, I'm not Jon.
Wait a minute. Before you
enter into my paradise,
I have to... I have to
check for little stuff.
- Okay?
- Okay.
Okay, let me see
what you have...
Do you have a gun
or something on you?
- No.
- Okay. What is in the bag?
- Okay, green stuff. Great.
- Uh-huh.
Okay, we talk
about this later.
Ladies, I'm sorry, but I
have to check you too, okay?
Does it look like I can
hide a gun in this dress?
Look, you look innocent,
you look very innocent,
but you may hide a gun
or something in your ass.
- You never know. You never know.
- [scoffs] What?
- Who is this guy?
- Okay, okay. You okay. Okay.
- How are you?
- Are you serious? Me too?
- Yeah, hold on a minute.
- [Andrei] Sorry.
- Is this some type of joke?
- Yeah, you okay.
You guys go forward.
Welcome to my paradise.
After you, please.
- You Jon, the guy I spoke to on the phone?
- Yeah.
- Nice meeting you.
- Nice to meet you.
So how do you know Surtain
and the boys?
We sold them some stuff
and they really liked it.
Phone? Since when
did you get a phone?
You never told me.
Are you lying to me, man?
- This is some place...
- Why you do that?
- I'm sorry... Very sorry to interrupt.
- Huh?
Oh, no problem.
I was gonna say,
this is some place
you guys got here.
Can we look around?
Yeah, please do.
You told me
one person will show up,
then three people show up
that we don't know.
Why you lie to me?
Look, he's got
a bag of money.
You invite strangers
to this facility,
- you cannot do that.
- I just invited him.
Oh, my God.
- So what? So what?
- He's got the money.
I didn't know three people
were gonna show up. Look...
You lied to me,
and what next?
- You know?
- [Jon] He's a pro,
he's one of the best
in the business.
- How do you know this?
- Because that's what the guys told me.
You're so naive,
I'm sorry to tell you.
You have to learn.
You have to learn.
- Go up to him.
- Before you buy a new phone, you have to learn about life.
- Because you don't know.
- [Jon] Okay.
They're gonna abuse you,
use you.
I'm not focused
on the girls, I...
Yes, you are,
you look at her like stupid.
Just focus
on his bag of money.
- [girls squeal] - [Harvey] What money?
He maybe don't have...
I invited him
because he has money,
I didn't know he would
bring two girls.
- Come on, just pick it up.
- I can't.
You can do it. Come on.
Look at what
she's doing.
When are we ever
in a place like this?
I don't want to be
in a place like this!
- Do it!
- Oh, my God.
What are you doing?
Look at what she's doing.
- It kind of looks like my dad.
- What do you mean, who cares?
Hey, bitch,
what are you doing?
Stop! Stop,
what are you doing?
Don't touch my stuff, okay?
- Hey! Excuse me, don't touch me.
- What are you doing?
[Andrei] Not cool with you
touching my girl.
Any more shit out of you two, I'm gonna
punch you both in your livers, okay?
- [Harvey] Huh.
- Who the fuck is this goblin?
Goblin doesn't like corporate
crooks in his house, okay?
Jon, he works for corporate.
Yeah, you're a spy.
- [scoffs] - You work
for them, right?
- [Jon] No, he...
- You try to come here to test me,
- I bet you. That's what you're gonna do.
- Harvey, he's not a spy.
He just wants
the gold teeth.
- What the fuck are you on?
- I am on anything.
What do you mean "on"?
- Drugs. I don't know.
- I mean...
You come here to my office
and start fight, right?
It's a blackmail, man.
I'm getting real tired
looking at this dude's
so we doing this or not?
I got reservations at Ago.
- Actually we want to go to Nobu.
- In Malibu.
- Nobu, Malibu.
- [Harvey chuckles]
[bags rustle]
[contents rattle]
- You happy?
- Whoa.
You mind if I use
your counter over there?
How the hell did you get
210 ounces of gold teeth here?
Hard work.
You got any more bags
of this stuff?
Yes, we do.
[light switch clicks]
All these boxes
are full of scrap?
What are you, D.B. Cooper
or something?
[Harvey] I work in Chinatown
for many decades
before I start my business.
Normally morgues
throw away teeth,
but I collect as souvenir.
I have all these boxes.
What about that?
- You know what we're gonna do?
- What?
I think that we can agree
that I'll use this
as a down payment for all
the rest of this shit.
Agree nothing.
How much is in it?
- $125,000.
- Wait a minute, I have to check, okay?
- Go right ahead.
- I don't trust you.
- [zipper opening]
- I don't. Oh.
- Looks like the real thing.
- Mm-hmm.
Oh, yeah, it is.
Okay, cool.
[zipper closes]
You give me a couple months, I
can sell all this scrap for you.
All right? With the
quality you got here,
I am going to make us
a ton of money. A ton.
But I get half
of what we sell,
and I would ask
that you don't tell
any of the other refineries
about what your stash here.
Look, there will be always
competition in business, my friend.
And you don't know that?
And you are not the only
salesperson in the entire world.
You think you own
the world? Huh?
But anyway, you know what?
I suspect you are
a spy, corporate spy.
Let's just start it tonight,
like little arrangement here,
and we'll see what happen,
where it goes.
Can we do that?
Jon, I don't know
where you dug this guy up,
but let's just make sure this is
profitable for you and I, okay?
Hey, dude, I'm here.
Why you even talk to him?
He's not in charge.
I am in charge.
Okay? I'm watching you!
- [latches close]
- I have to go now.
I'm tired. Come on,
let's go. Let's go.
Come on, watch your head.
[light switch clicks]
Well, I did not expect this.
- I give you a little credit.
- I told you.
I wouldn't have brought you
into this if it wasn't legit.
Yeah, but I need
my keys back anyhow.
I need the keys,
come on.
I'm just going to take a little
bit of money, we'll figure out...
No, you cannot take this money.
We have...
First of all, was it a test?
Maybe it was the FBI,
or this guy
maybe was undercover,
guy from the cremation
foundation, okay?
- You cannot just take it.
- That doesn't make any sense.
I need a place to live.
Traci's already asking me
what I'm doing.
I don't have money,
I have nothing.
Traci will love you
without money,
that will be great test
for you guys.
- Okay, help me with this, come on.
- Well...
Let me tell you, I take
good care of this, okay?
You cannot spend it.
- Okay? So help me with this, come on.
- Where are we gonna...
- Hold this bag.
- Where are we gonna hide it?
In my place.
I know where we hide it.
- Very special place.
- [zipper closes]
Help me.
Come on, let's go.
- Okay, we are here.
- [bag thuds]
Hold it.
Okay, open it.
Follow me.
- Okay, hold this.
- Yeah.
This is great place to store
money, you don't think?
Hey, dude, nobody
will expect it.
Where the hell did you
get an ATM machine?
I have resources, okay?
This is antique,
this is collector's item.
Beautiful, huh?
Okay, now listen, we cannot do
business right here. Attend business.
- You know why?
- Why?
Because this is our club.
That's why, okay?
- And nobody comes here except us.
- Okay.
- No-no spending, okay?
- Yeah.
Trust me, friendship
before money.
Can you say this?
- Yeah.
- What?
- Trust me, friendship before money. Yeah.
- Right!
[keypad beeping]
[door groans]
because they seem
new, sudden.
But most are not new
to the signs of the ages.
Wow, what an ending.
You know, I never thought
I would enjoy watching these
black and white movies so much.
See? I told you
you'd like it.
It's my favorite thing to do on my days
off, watch black and white movies.
And I don't know who came
up with these plots,
but it's as if the last
10 minutes
are all about
trusting no one.
How about we have a date
night at your place?
We can order a big thing
of pizza, some wine,
- and Double Indemnity?
- Yeah, yeah.
- Sounds-sounds perfect.
- Yeah?
My-my place won't be ready
for a few weeks, though, so...
What, you got a condo in the
Palisades or something?
Uh... working on it.
Well, you're more than welcome
to stay here until then.
Cool, yeah.
- [door squeaks] - All
right, boys, all right.
- [Harvey] Hey.
- How we doin'? How you doin'?
Okay, this map right here
details all the drop points.
Okay? All the deals
go down after 8:00,
you're gonna tally
all your deals in this.
No problem,
I'm good organizer.
[Andrei] Excellent.
Tomorrow night, your first drop is
gonna be the San Marino location.
I want you to wait
for a guy named Twigs.
He's like... he's a funny
looking dude in a hat, okay?
- Who?
- Twigs.
Jon, we need bodyguard.
- Yeah, if we dealing with gangsters?
- [Andrei] Listen.
My guys are, like, tech
nerds and dentists.
Worse that's gonna happen is, they're
gonna throw some dental floss on you.
Are you kidding me?
Listen to me,
I don't want you
messing with my dudes,
all right?
Wait a minute, we are here
to make money, all right?
And I am businessman.
You understand that?
- Yeah.
- We have to be on the same page, right?
We're on the same page.
Now we're talkin'.
Now we're talkin',
all right. Very good.
I'll see you jokesters
in a couple weeks.
Hopefully by then we're
gonna be making some dough.
We'll see.
- Happy scrapping, boys.
- All right.
[door whines]
- Morning.
- Hey.
You wanna get up?
I have a really
awesome place
I wanna take you
for breakfast.
Yeah, let's do it.
But you gotta get up.
- 10 more minutes?
- [chuckles]
All right, I'm gonna
go get ready.
By the time I get back,
you better be up.
Okay. Promise.
- What the hell's this?
- Oh, shit.
Um, yeah, uh...
I-I can explain, um...
I-I-I-I work with a friend
of mine, he runs a morgue,
and I help out there,
so we...
- Wait, a morgue?
- Yeah, a morgue, um...
Part of his gig
is putting masks
on, um, disfigured people's
faces for funerals.
I know it's-it's weird.
Um, and-and he made a mask
of my face for some reason,
and it... honestly, it's
harmless, there's nothing to it.
Well, you said you were...
No, no, no, you said you were
in the gold business.
Yeah. I am, yeah, exactly.
I am in the gold business,
and Harvey,
that's my friend's name,
he's got boxes of gold teeth,
and we're setting up
this business,
and I just didn't know
how to tell you, I...
Do you even
have your own place?
We can't spend the money
right now,
and I was supposed to get
a place a couple weeks ago.
I'm working on it.
I know it's weird,
we've just been
getting along so well...
So I-i-is it illegal?
No, no, no, no, not at all.
It's not illegal. Look, I...
Okay, why don't you come
see where I work?
Why don't you meet my friend
and it'll make sense?
I know it's weird to see
a mask and teeth and shit,
but it's... it...
it all adds up.
Trust me, it's harmless.
Why am I just hearing
about this friend now?
You know since we first met,
you have been so secretive.
Please just give me
a second chance.
I got nothing to hide,
I'll take you to him.
Whatever you want to know,
I'll show you.
[stammers] Is that cool?
- Just give me a chance. It's...
- Whatever.
[Harvey's voice]
You are late.
We have big issue!
Meet me at car dealership
by 3 PM!
Hey, what's the rush?
What are we doing here?
Let me show you
I have a surprise for you.
Come on.
[door whines]
Follow me.
[car engine starts]
Wait, how did you
just start that?
It's automatic.
You know, it's
a new technology.
I could start it
100 miles from here.
- Is this your car?
- Yes, it's mine, it's mine.
This is my dream car.
I love this car.
I treat myself,
this is my little baby.
But guess what?
You see this one here?
It's crooked.
It's crooked.
But guess what?
I got a discount.
You know,
I told the salesman,
"What's happen here?"
He say,
"Hey, you know what?
It's a one of a kind."
And I say, "Yeah, I'm a one
of a million too, right?
I'm special, I'm unique."
So I say, "Give me a discount."
He give me the discount.
You know?
I pay only $80,000.
Instead of $95,000.
You spent $80,000
on this car?
Yes, it's beautiful.
Mm, my little baby, ahh!
I can lick it, ahh.
Come on.
Let's go for spin!
[Harvey chuckles]
We reach mountain of money,
my friend, okay?
And now we should
take it easy.
Lay low, as they say.
You haven't touched
any of our money, right?
No, no, no.
No, I did not!
Everything is secret.
Okay. All right,
at this point
there's plenty of money
for both of us.
All right?
You take your share,
you redo your morgue.
I take my share and I get a
place with Traci, we're good.
Traci? You should take it
easy with her, okay?
If she loves you,
she will accept
your little
tiny apartment, okay?
- The studio, they call it.
- No.
That's totally
unrealistic, all right?
We're happy, we can't
live in a little shithole.
You know what?
You cannot buy your relationship
by using money, okay?
Look, it does not
work that way.
No, I appreciate
your advice,
but I worked hard
for my money
I'll be responsible for it.
You're not responsible, you
don't know anything, okay?
And anyway, I cannot release
money of this kind of condition.
Okay, if you just met Traci, you'd
understand what I'm talking about.
Look, I don't be mediated
between Traci and you
- and all of your drama!
- I'm not saying that!
- She wants to meet you.
- Serious?
- I'm serious.
- How and when?
Let's go to her work,
right now.
Let's go meet her.
- Hey. Listen.
- Hey. How you doing?
It was great
doing business with you.
- I wanna give you something.
- Okay.
- My card.
- Oh, wow, business card. Thank you.
- All right.
- [scoffs] What else do you want?
You sold me a crooked car,
you know, what else you want?
It's over. It's finished.
It's done. Okay?
Anything else?
All salespeople
are the same.
car salesperson.
[engine rumbles]
- Oh... Hi.
- Hi.
You didn't tell me
she's so beautiful.
She's beautiful.
- Nice to meet you, Terri.
- Traci.
- Oh, Traci, okay.
- Nice to meet you.
I've heard
a lot about you.
Like what?
Well, Jon told me
about how you work with dead
people and you make masks.
Yeah, you mean
special skills, okay?
And I collect
their holy work, okay?
Holy work?
But don't you think
about sex, okay?
Don't even think
about it, okay?
It's not sex, it has
nothing to do with sex.
I didn't say anything
about sex.
- I saw the mask you made of him.
- Uh-huh.
Don't you think
that's a little...
a little too real?
A little weird?
What do you use it for?
It was fun!
It was fun,
he's so cool guy.
What's your story?
What is your story,
Well, I work here...
I'm just a simple guy.
Working hard.
- You're working here? Ah, okay.
- I'm working here,
and Jon's my boyfriend.
- Oh, he is?
- Where are you from?
Planet Earth.
- "Planet Earth."
- [laughs]
Okay, very cool!
Yeah, it is cool,
isn't it?
You know about gold
and the money?
Money, gold?
Let me show you
something. Okay.
This is... this is...
this is gold, right?
And this is what?
Money, right?
Which one you like?
This or this?
[laughs] This or...
[hums circus song]
Yeah, I don't know
what all this is,
but you want
to know my story?
- Yeah. What's your story?
- I work here.
- Uh-huh.
- And that's my boyfriend.
That's all
you need to know.
[laughs] You know what?
Some day he will support you.
You don't have to work
at this lousy restaurant.
[continues laughing]
Okay, I don't need him
to support me, okay?
I'm very independent,
thank you.
Oh... [chuckles]
You know, I just say
that just for fun.
I have to go now, okay?
So... It's cold here.
I have to go to car.
Okay? Okay.
You see, Jon, the way
she say independent girl?
[scoffs] She's so condescending.
Can you see that?
And she's
too negative, Jon.
Wait, how is
that negative?
She's just trying
to get to know you.
You know, you shouldn't... shouldn't
talk to her about money, okay?
In fact, she's...
she's gold digger.
Gold digger?
That's ridiculous.
You can get a girl
without money.
I'm not using money.
She knows I have nothing.
The way I see it,
I have to keep
our money little longer.
No, no, no, that's ridiculous.
We had a deal.
- We made a certain amount, we split it up,
- Wait a minute.
- And now you're changing it.
- Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
I have a right
for judgment.
No, and you never
cleared it with me.
You got a new car
without even telling me.
[scoffs] The car? This
car's business expense.
- Business expense? You had a hearse! A Bel-Air!
- Wait a minute!
The other car blow up, okay?
What do you expect me to do,
walk wherever I'm going?
Just walk?
Look, I am in charge
here, okay?
I know, okay?
And maybe you should be
me for one day, okay?
That'd be... that'd be
good, though, all right?
I'm in charge here.
I know what to do,
all right?
And you should listen
to me, okay?
End of story.
Please stop.
[cell phone beeping]
Yes, can I speak
to Malmo please?
Hi, Malmo.
How you doing?
Yeah, I see the paperwork
right here,
and, um, yeah, that's fine.
Yeah. Yeah, look, don't argue
with me, please, okay?
I will have money for you, okay?
Yeah, you can send your guy,
if you like.
Around like 7:00.
7:00 PM is too late?
It doesn't matter...
[man] I'm a nice guy,
I want to help you,
I want to make this
work for you,
but you gotta help me
back here.
I understand
you're nice guy, Malmo.
I love you for it.
I really do.
Then you gotta help me,
all right?
Don't make me chase you around,
return my phone calls.
All right?
You want this or not?
What do you
need from me?
How many times
do I have to tell you?
I need the first installment
tomorrow night in cash.
- Three hundred thousand dollars.
- Look, I cannot do...
You changed
the entire agreement.
You wanna fuck around,
you fuck around
with somebody else, okay?
You wanted it done right,
you'd do with me, okay?
I'll give you till Tuesday,
that's it.
Tuesday's my birthday.
And I don't work.
Jesus Christ, look.
I don't know what you
want me to do here, okay?
My guy's waiting,
you pay him.
Take it or leave it.
You need tomorrow?
I'm done.
I'm done with you.
Okay, wait a minute,
wait a minute.
Okay, tomorrow.
You get it tomorrow.
But you're such a brutal,
you know?
You're such a jerk,
all right?
- [groans]
- [Jon] Hey.
Oh, hi, Jon. This is Mr. Shurten.
Shelton, right?
And you'll be our
new janitor, right?
- Maybe.
- Oh, yeah. I'll be the, uh, the janitor here.
- Okay, well, have a nice day,
- Yeah, well, get back to me.
- And we may call you.
- Tomorrow.
- Okay.
- Tomorrow night.
Happy birthday.
Thank you.
- Oh, Jon.
- What's going on?
Look, poor guy
looking for the job.
He wanted a job.
He may replace you
because you always late.
You know? How many times
you been late?
Anyway, clean up here,
do something.
I'm not doing your job.
Just clean up
little bit.
[keypad beeping]
- It's Harvey, right?
- Yeah.
What the hell is this?
[scoffs] Why do you ask
this stupid question?
Who are you?
Why are you here?
- I work for Malmo.
- Oh, yeah.
He was very disrespectful
towards me,
I don't know
if you know that.
- I'm his assistant. Jesus!
- So what?
- Why you here?
- Money.
Money, how much?
- Three hundred.
- I got your 300,000.
Be patient, for God's sake.
You guys all the same.
- [scoffs]
- [keys jingle]
[safe unlocks]
Three hundred thousand,
here you go.
[Harvey] It's all there.
You know this isn't how we
normally do these things.
Cash is cash,
what do you expect?
What are you going to do?
Do you ever hear
of a cashier's check?
Who cares about
cashier's check?
What a dick!
What a idiot.
[distant siren wailing]
- Hey. What's wrong?
- [sighs] You called it.
All right, I saw him
with my own eyes.
He's exchanging hundreds
of thousands of dollars
with some dude
named Malmo, all right?
They're gonna burn through
everything I worked for.
[Traci sighs]
Is this drugs?
Are you in trouble?
- No. It's not drugs.
- Is he gonna hurt you?
We sold pounds
of gold teeth, all right?
We made almost
- Two million dollars?
- Yeah, $2,000,000,
and he's storing it
in some fucking storage shed,
and I haven't seen
a penny of it.
Wait, whose idea
was this?
It was my idea!
All right?
Son of a bitch
stole my idea.
Wait, who is
this Malmo guy?
I don't know.
Harvey's probably
using this money
to pay off his debts,
all right?
He's got a lawsuit
against him.
He's so full of shit! I mean,
they're-they're coming after him,
they're suing him
for necrophilia and I...
Oh, God, Jon, you need to get
your shit together, okay?
And you need to go
get your damn money.
When do you
see him next?
All right. Let's go get
your money.
Let's do it.
[children playing]
- Where are you taking me?
- All right, just straight ahead.
Just a little bit further.
- Where?
- I got a nice surprise for you.
- Oh, man.
- Just a little bit further.
- You all right? We're almost there.
- Yeah.
It's pitch black,
I cannot see anything.
I know, I got you.
I got you.
I've got it.
What's his favorite band?
His favorite kind of music?
I don't know,
Rolling Stones.
[Traci] Rolling Stones.
So what if, for his birthday
surprise, we got him tickets
to go see the Rolling Stones,
somewhere far away?
[Jon] But what if
there's no concert?
Then we make one up.
Happy birthday, my friend.
We got you tickets
to the Rolling Stones.
Oh! That's my favorite!
- How did you know?
- In Vegas, remember?
You kept singing
You said
it's your favorite band.
- I did?
- Yeah.
I don't remember.
I mean, I...
[scoffs] It's great.
I'm-I'm speechless.
We just need to get him
far away from the safe,
get him shitface drunk,
and you somehow
get those keys.
[exhales sharply]
You stop at a gas station
and meet me at the bathroom.
I go back to the safe.
You keep driving up the coast,
and once he blacks out,
ditch the creep.
From there,
we go to Colorado.
It's been long time 'til someone
actually say happy birthday to me.
You know what? I will
make my wish right now.
By the time
that creep wakes up,
we'll be in our own home
in Colorado with 2 mil...
living in paradise.
This is finally our shot
to get out of L.A.
Oh, yeah,
it will come true.
- You think?
- I think so.
Anyway, look, so why
are we friends?
You know, I... I think
we needed each other.
To find out
who we really are.
Who are we?
Pull over.
I have to pee like hell.
Come on, pull over.
It's beautiful here.
I think I will take a walk,
think about life.
[cell phone buzzes]
[message tone chimes]
[cell phone beeping]
[message tone chimes]
Jon, last night
I had bad dream about you.
Bad vibration.
It's sad that you have
no respect for me.
What are you
talking about?
Nobody, no one will spoil
my birthday. No one.
Take picture of me,
come on. Here.
You clumsy.
[shutter clicking]
- All right.
- Come on, one more.
Happy birthday to me,
happy birthday to me
Happy birthday to me!
- Whoa!
- Harvey, Harvey, Harvey!
Be careful.
Come on. Let's...
We gotta get going, we only
have a few hours to get there.
- Going where?
- The concert, we gotta go.
- What concert, where?
- I parked the car illegally.
Where's the concert?
Where's the concert?
- You're drunk.
- Look at this edge.
- You're not making any sense.
- Come over here.
- We gotta go.
- Come over here, for God's sake!
You see this edge?
Maybe someday
you find out the truth.
You're such a liar, man.
- Where is concert, Jon?
- Candlestick Park!
- It's on the ticket.
- It was demolished two years ago.
[Harvey laughing]
- Have it!
- Hey, what the hell are you doing?
Come on, let's go!
- Let's go.
- There's no place to go.
It's a fake ticket!
It's not real, Jon. I already
told you over and over.
Jon, you stole my key,
didn't you?
- I didn't steal anything.
- Yes, you did!
These my keys
in your pocket?
Or are you just happy
to see me?
You know, there's something
wrong with you.
You know, your mother,
your story,
and you, you're like
a homeless person,
with no soul
and with no friends.
- Fuck you!
- Yeah, fuck you too.
[Harvey laughs]
So I'm the liar, right?
You don't... you don't have...
Yes, you're a liar!
You're a super liar!
You don't have
any secrets, right?
I know your game.
- [Harvey] What game?
- Stop bullshitting me.
- Bullshitting what?
- I know everything.
- Like what?
- I know everything.
- You don't know shit.
- Let's start with this.
- Who's Malmo?
- [laughs]
I work really hard
for my money, asshole.
You're such a prick,
is what you are.
Where's the money
in the safe?
- You're just like a prick!
- You bought the car,
- you spent all the money.
- What money?
- And I don't have anything.
- You don't need anything,
'cause you already have
everything, that's why!
So who's Malmo? You still
haven't answered me.
You're an ungrateful spy,
that's what you are.
I give you everything!
Job, friendship, advice!
You didn't give me nothing!
I kill you, man!
What the fuck
are you doing, man?
What's your problem?
[typewriter clacking]
[Harvey] I believe the deceased
should be protected
and we should give them
a voice.
What did I teach you?
Friendship before money, Jon.
You never learn.
I warn you to listen,
they are coming after you now.
You went down
like Elizabeth did,
in tragedy,
but in two different pieces.
Soon everybody in the world
will know what you did.
Do you feel evil,
Do you?
You drive me crazy, Jon!
[hysterical crying]
Evil man!
Burn in hell!