Beyond the Chamber of Terror (2021) Movie Script
(gentle harpsichord music)
(engine roars) (heavy metal music)
[Narrator] It's been
said that within all of us,
there is a hero prepared
to rise against the odds,
regardless of how
insurmountable they may appear.
Just so happens at this particular moment,
a hero, unbeknownst to himself,
is entombed within the
trunk of this moving vehicle.
But... (chuckles)
I'm getting ahead of myself.
Let me take you back a bit.
And yes, this tale of the
macabre is in fact 99% factual.
(Tyler groans)
(Tyler groans and whimpers)
(Tyler pants and grunts)
(plastic tears)
(Tyler yelps)
(Tyler pants) (ominous music)
Thank you. Oh, thank God.
Oh, my God. Thank you.
Oh, for a second there.
I thought I was a goner.
Oh. (Pants)
Oh, thanks a mil, Mister, uh...
It's cool.
Yeah, we got plenty of time
to get acquainted. (Pants)
As soon as you get me outta this pickle.
For the life of me, I can't
figure out how I got here,
or where here is, for that matter.
(feet stomp rhythmically)
A wooden box.
(hands slap)
Coffin!
Awesome.
You know, the sooner you get me outta here,
the better it's gonna
be for the both of us,
'cause you just hit the
jackpot, 'cause my name's-
Tyler Ackerman.
Son of mobster scum-fuck Russell Ackerman.
Look, whatever my father likely did
has got nothing to fucking do with me.
This has nothing to do with your father,
per se.
9.9 times out of 10, he
would be the sole guilty party.
I did drop a "per se",
and for a high school
dropout, such as yourself,
the definition being...
(Nash sighs) (phone keypad clicks)
[Phone] By or in itself,
or oneself, or themselves.
So, you see, your father's on my...
Along with you and your crony.
(ominous music continues)
(ominous music continues)
Now you know why you're in this pickle?
I don't, I, I...
My friends call me "N.C.".
Since we're in no God damn way that,
you will call me
Mr. Fucking Caruthers!
Mr. Caruthers.
Mr. Fucking Caruthers!
Okay, okay, okay, okay!
Mr. Fucking Caruthers.
Whoever told you what you think I did
is a liar.
(leather creaks)
(screaming and clattering from phone)
That was a wrong place,
wrong time type of thing.
You gotta understand, it's just business.
I mean...
Hey, stop. What're you doing?
Stop. Don't you, don't you fucking dare!
Fuck you! You fucking loser.
You fuck! (Hammer thudding)
Oh, you're a dead man!
You're so fucking dead!
(Tyler grunts) (hammer thudding)
Come on, you little fuck!
Come back, come back!
Please, please, just come back.
Just, come on! I, I...
(door slams) (Tyler pants)
(door thuds) (Tyler pants)
(ominous music continues)
(wood snaps)
(Tyler pants)
(ominous music continues)
(ominous music continues)
(Tyler screams)
(dark synth music)
(dark synth music continues)
(dark synth music continues)
(dark synth music continues)
(dark synth music continues)
(dark synth music continues)
(dark synth music continues)
(dark synth music continues)
(dark synth music continues)
(dark synth music continues)
(crowd yelling)
(muffled yelling)
(door clicks open)
(door thuds) (keys clinking)
(refrigerator hums)
(Nash sighs)
(refrigerator door slams)
(muffled footsteps clacking)
(door creaks)
(bottles clinking)
(door creaks)
(keys clinking)
(refrigerator hums) (bottles clinking)
(refrigerator door slams)
(refrigerator hums) (bottles clinking)
(refrigerator door slams)
(bottles clinking)
(onion crunches)
(refrigerator door slams)
(footsteps clacking)
(bottle hisses)
(Nash spits) (cap clatters)
(muffled gunfire)
(distant civilian screams)
(moody synth music)
[Video Game Announcer] Suburban Fighter.
(gunfire from TV)
Gnarly.
Wicked.
(gunfire from TV)
Dope move.
(knocks on door)
(lively video game music)
(ominous music)
(Nash sighs)
(brick thuds) (Lennox groans)
(fist thuds)
(door creaks)
(door slams)
(Lennox spits)
[Lennox] Motherfucker broke my tooth!
Teeth.
Plural.
[Lennox] Oh, you.
I foresee dentures in your
immediate fucking future!
Lennox! Cool the fuck out, man!
No, we need this guy alive!
No, if he croaks, our employer's
gonna fuck us to the max
before ever lets us live!
Clear enough picture for you?
Oh, for fuck sakes, man!
Oh, fuck. You really did this time.
Fuck.
What? He's, uh...
He's dead?
Yeah, shit for brains.
I mean, this is basic cause and effect.
You repeatedly stomp on a man's skull,
chances of him expiring
are pretty colossal!
Oh, fuck!
I mean, this dude isn't young either.
If the blunt force trauma
doesn't do him in, then I mean,
his bad ticker's gonna.
Uh...
I didn't mean to. He just...
Yeah. You feel like shit?
Yeah. You ought a.
Fuck! To think I vouched
for you for this gig!
You, you just dug my own
grave, alongside your fuckin' own!
Oh, Casey, I'm sorry!
I just have this temper.
And I just wanna fucking
punch things and... (grunts)
Oh, my God, chill out!
Are you nuts?
(chuckles) It's a joke.
This is a fucking joke.
(Lennox pants)
(Casey chuckles)
Why would you do that? I
could've concussed myself.
Oh, my God. I mean, it must hurt.
- Yeah?
- Yeah, I mean...
- A little bit, yeah.
- Yeah, okay.
Too bad. Pick up the piece of shit.
(Lennox sighs) (door creaks)
You son of a bitch!
(birds chirping) (ominous music)
(ominous music continues)
(ominous music continues)
(ominous music continues)
(ominous music continues)
(ominous music continues)
(moody electronic dance music)
(moody electronic dance music continues)
(moody electronic dance music continues)
(moody electronic dance music continues)
Look into my eyes
Gonna find it hard to leave
Look into my eyes
Gonna see what you can't see
When you take my hand
Show you the way.
(tarp rustles)
(muffled dance music from earphones)
Seriously, B?
Don't at me, Ava.
I'm working as hard as
I can, as fast as I can.
Yeah, that's not what I meant.
However, since you mentioned
it, this floor doesn't look
any less vomit-inducing
than when you started.
Yeah, well, no amount
of hard work is gonna
make this place not look
like the bowels of hell.
And what did I do to
deserve this: Seriously, B
comment?
Oh, yeah. That.
Well, as you know, I'm tough as an ox,
but weak when it comes to certain scents.
Brain matter being one of them.
Now, buckets of blood I can handle,
but when it comes to this shit,
instant projectile. I just-
Okay, so where's your trusty face mask
to deal with this sort of dilemma?
(Benny chuckles)
Two words. Casey fuckin' Flanagan.
Ugh. That's three words.
And also, say no more.
Bitch gloated that she
flushed it, alongside her turd.
(Ava sighs)
Who does that?
Anyway, my savior of
two years, gone forever.
You know you're like
twice her size, right? So how?
And, sorry, why do you
let her push you around?
Because my mate since elementary school
decided to promote that
jabroni to her number one lap dog,
and seniority is a bitch.
Mm.
You know that I had absolutely
nothing to do with that.
Besides, even if I did,
your emesis problem would
be a very tough sell, Benny.
- I'm sorry.
- Bane of my existence.
Yeah. But we'll always be BFFs.
Yeah, well, if it doesn't
get me out of custodial duties,
it amounts to dick-all.
Okay. Benny, my sweet?
- Yes?
- Hurry the fuck up.
I wanna go home.
Yeah, yeah. (Scoffs)
(doorbell rings)
(moody electronic dance music)
Yeah. Yes?
(Ava clears throat)
Yes?
[Killian] A, B, C. One, two, three.
(door creaks)
Dr. Killian?
You brought us dinner.
How very out of character.
I am never out of character.
(footsteps clacking)
Okay.
I just... Could you be so kind?
(bag rustles)
(footsteps clacking)
I, um, I'm confused.
What are you doing back again so soon?
Did your father not notify you?
No. That's a pattern, I'm afraid.
It's just, you usually only
do one house call a day.
Tonight is that million-dollar exception.
Oh, and your father is en route.
Oh.
Who could it be?
I think you may know.
(bag rustles)
(gentle harpsichord music)
Shit.
(engine roars) (muffled heavy metal music)
(heavy metal music)
(footsteps clacking)
What is the meaning of this?
What do you mean?
Clean as a whistle, Cochise.
(hurried footsteps clacking)
Who told you to clean up?
It's my job, man. That's
what I do around here.
A grotesque aftermath does half the job!
Put it back as it was!
(Killian yells in foreign language)
Come on. Come on!
- Come on.
- Fuck, Benny!
(hurried footsteps clacking) (Benny sighs)
Fuckin' horse shit!
(muffled heavy metal music)
(muffled heavy metal music)
(birds chirping)
(car door clicks open)
(car door slams)
(trunk door squeaks)
Final destination, asshole.
(Casey chuckles)
(fist thuds)
(tarp rustles) (Lennox pants)
Loving the Hammer Horror
meets torture porn crossover.
Don't mind my com padre.
He's a huge horror junkie.
Where do you want him?
The, uh, (chuckles) chair of doom.
Oh, this place is
getting better and better!
(body thumps)
(footsteps clacking)
The deadbeat of the day is
ready for maximum displeasure.
How often did you barge into the office,
when my brother was running things?
He wouldn't have minded.
That's not what I asked.
Dressed to impress tonight, Casey?
Do you have any word on Tyler?
(clears throat) No.
But apparently that fellow you
picked up may know something.
Really?
Yeah, my father's so certain,
he had the doc come back again tonight.
Ooh! Twice within 24 hours?
Now, that's unprecedented.
Mm-hm.
Appears to be the theme
of the evening, I'm afraid.
Yeah. You don't have
to tell me that twice.
(both chuckle)
(footsteps clacking)
(tarp rustles)
(knife clacks)
(Lennox chuckles)
Mm!
No one told me there'd be
eye candy up in this hellhole.
Dressed to impress.
[Lennox] And passed with flyin' colors!
(Benny groans)
Yeah.
You. (Benny sighs)
Me.
(gun thuds) (Lennox groans)
Your batting average
is for shit thus far.
A word of advice, shut the
fuck up until I say otherwise,
and we might just live
to see beyond tonight.
To the uninitiated.
Ouch.
My name is Ava.
Ava Ackerman.
And as of today,
I will be taking over
the role of Underboss.
I know, I know.
A woman (chuckles)
in an authoritarian role,
in this line of work.
Well, you're just going
to have to get used to it
for the time being.
This isn't a "fuck the patriarchy" moment.
It's a case of my
presently missing brother.
(Nash laughs)
Like I was saying.
I will be filling in for my
brother, for the time being.
And if I were you, I would save my energy
until my father arrives.
You're gonna wish that you did.
(Nash mumbles)
(Ava scoffs)
Okay, fine. Sure.
I guess a sneak preview wouldn't hurt.
(bag rustles)
You guys put that on really fuckin' tight.
What's with the shades?
Okay.
I'll chalk it up to a
last request. (Chuckles)
Oh, yeah.
I can see Dr. Killian getting
a real kick working on you.
[Nash] Fuck you.
Oh, fuck me? (Chuckles) Fuck me?
I gather he's not on your radar, right?
'Cause if he was, you would've
surely shit yourself by now.
(Nash chuckles)
You have something really
important to say, don't you?
And it just can't wait.
Whoa. I don't think
that's such a hot idea, Ava.
- I say do it.
- You would.
What's that supposed to mean?
Well, maybe I'm implying that
you wouldn't mind seeing
Ava fuck up on day one.
Yeah? And what would I gain from that?
Well, you're hoping
and thinking, everything.
- You're way off, lap dog.
- Man, sit and spin, bitch!
What the fuck did you say?
(hand thuds)
(Casey blows)
(Benny sighs)
How about it?
Mister...
Casey, Mister?
Uh, Nash Caruthers.
(chuckles) Caruthers.
How about it, Mr. Caruthers?
Would I be making a grave mistake,
removing the tape from your mouth?
(Nash grunts)
Do you have something to
say concerning my brother
that just cannot wait a couple hours more?
(tape tears)
Well, the floor is yours.
For your sake, don't waste it.
Can we rewind things a little bit?
Rewind things?
I was finishing your sentence,
but it was muted by the tape.
If you could go back a couple of lines,
I'd gladly repeat what I said.
Mm.
You like games. Don't you, Mr. Caruthers?
I don't.
I just think without the setup,
what I'm gonna say is
gonna lose the desired effect.
I'm not fucking around,
stalling, 'cause like you said,
Big Daddy Ackerman is
still a couple of hours away.
Now, if what I say doesn't get a reaction,
which I know it will,
all you have to do is gag me up again.
Your only worry
will be that little fuckin'
retarded, worthless
fucktard who totally screams snitch.
Hm.
But that's a you problem.
I know what my problem is.
No two ways around that.
Okay.
(Ava chuckles)
Okay, fine. I'll, uh,
I'll go along with it.
So, what would you like
me to say, Mr. Director?
Just repeat what you said,
before I rudely interrupted.
Well, I talk a lot, so you're
gonna have to remind me.
(Ava chuckles)
You said...
"Yada, yada, yada."
I am woman. Hear me roar.
"It's a case of my
presently missing brother."
That's a decent memory that you have.
I wish it wasn't the case.
Okay, sure. Fuck, fuck it.
For all intent and purposes,
I will stick to your script,
because honestly, I, I don't recall, so...
- Action.
- Thanks.
(Ava clears throat)
Yada, yada, yada.
Fuck the patriarchy thing.
A case of my presently missing-
Deceased brother!
(ominous music)
How do you know that?
Take a wild guess, honey bitch.
Listen. He's full of shit, Ava.
Don't listen to him.
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
Then why did these stooges
put in all the effort to nab me?
Ask 'em!
All I know is this idiot left behind
a mile-wide red herring.
It's almost like he was trying to get-
Caught!
(ominous music continues)
Listen here, little miss.
I did your little mafia a world of good
by removing big brother from the equation.
Definitely not leadership material.
He was a no good,
worthless ass piece of...
(scalpel scrapes)
- Ava!
(blood splutters) Jesus Christ!
Casey, get the doc!
He's here?
He's in the cafeteria! Get him!
If this guy bleeds out, we're dead!
Go, now!
Give me your shirt,
what's-his-name! Give me your shirt!
- This is new!
- Give it to me!
- Ah fuck!
- Do it!
Yeah.
Oh, fuck!
Fuck!
(Ava whimpers)
(approaching footsteps shuffling)
Oh.
God. Thank you.
(Ava sighs)
Thought you'd wanna know that, uh,
Killian's hard at work on that perp.
(Ava sighs) (somber music)
B, I really fucked up back there.
I don't know what came over me.
I think you released a lot of tension
in the worst time and way possible.
(Ava sighs)
Between you and me,
you know, I'm just the temp Underboss.
The moment my father found out
that his golden boy slash
my kid brother was missing,
he didn't know what to do.
It was never in the cards for me
to permanently take
over the family business.
So, if Caruthers flat lines,
accept my sincerest apologies.
Hey.
You'll never have to apologize to me.
Not ever.
(Benny sighs)
Look on the bright side.
At least you achieved catharsis, huh?
(both giggling)
Fuck! (Sighs)
Yeah, fuck.
(flesh squelches)
(tarp rustles)
(scissors snip)
Doc?
Never in my wildest dreams
did I think I would be saving a life again.
Sorry.
I think some extra
zeros to my fee will suffice.
Yeah. Yeah, of course.
And if everybody else
could keep this incident,
this small, tiny, tiny little
incident to yourselves,
that would be greatly appreciated.
That goes doubly for you, Casey.
Like the doc said, some extra dough.
Fine, okay. Fuck, fine.
I will wire all of you money
by Monday morning, if he lives.
(Ava sighs)
So, boss, how you gonna spin this one?
Just, um, um...
You know, just that...
Oh, okay. I know.
Just that I took the initiative
to secure the guest myself,
and in, in the, the
process, he took the scalpel
and, and attempted suicide.
Luckily, he is one tough curv.
No quit in him.
Yet.
Thank God for that.
So...
So, when, when can we
expect him to wake up?
Hard to tell.
(Nash coughs) (ominous music)
(Nash grunts)
(chair scrapes)
(Ava sighs)
Who are you?
Okay, here's the dilemma.
On one hand, it was
extremely unprofessional of me
to do what I did to you.
Admittedly, that...
It was actually my first
act of physical violence.
On the other hand, (chuckles)
My father seems to think
that you have something to do
with the disappearance of my brother.
So, naturally, you can
understand why I did what I did.
So, I am sorry, but
actually, no, I'm not sorry.
I know
his whereabouts.
(ominous music)
No. (Chuckles)
No, no, no. Uh...
I'll wait for my father this time.
Okay.
Can we play a game?
You don't like games.
Something to pass the time.
No, no, no, no. (Chuckles)
You are an ace at pushing my buttons.
So, I think that I will go
ahead and just sit this one out.
You ever play hot and cold?
Mm.
Well, yeah. (Chuckles)
If you win,
you gain some much needed
brownie points with Daddy.
I get the impression he doesn't
have the utmost confidence
his little girl is up to the task.
This guy's trouble.
(ominous music continues)
Cold.
Extreme cold.
(chair scrapes)
Gettin' warmer.
You're gettin' warmer.
(tarp rustles)
Okay, but this isn't gonna
work from this point on.
Why don't you try your phone?
Her phone.
(footsteps clacking)
Warmish. (Suspenseful music)
Warmer, but less so.
Is it just me or is it getting toasty?
Hot!
(sucks teeth)
(suspenseful music continues)
(door creaks)
(door creaks)
All right, little miss. Take a
look and see what you've won.
(suspenseful music continues)
(door shuts)
(suspenseful music continues)
(tarp rustles)
(no audio)
("Dance of the Sugar
Plum Fairy" from earphones)
(ominous music)
Have at it, lug wrench.
(crowbar clunks)
(suspenseful music)
Nah.
(crowbar clunks)
(scoffs) Great. Perfect. Perfect.
(scoffs) Thanks a lot.
(wood creaks and cracks)
(wood creaks and cracks)
(Benny retches) (vomit splashes)
Oh, God.
I guess it's not just brain
matter that makes me queasy.
Oh.
Okay. Do, do I even wanna look?
It's bad, but it's not your brother.
Oh.
[Lennox] Yeah, but we still
got another one to go, so...
Real smooth, Mr. Tact.
I think that's Gino D'Amico.
Yeah.
Oh, it's Gino D'Amico.
Who's Gino D'Amico?
Brother's bestie.
Well... (sighs)
Onto the next.
Shall we?
Yeah?
(Benny scoffs)
(hand thuds) (Benny groans)
Oh, fuck!
Oh, fuck!
(blood drips) (Benny groans)
(Benny screams) (ominous music)
(Gino snarls) (Benny screams)
Oh, fuck!
Yeah, no.
(Ava grunts)
Lennox!
(ominous music continues)
(Killian yells in foreign language)
(Ava grunts)
(blood splatters)
(Ava gasps)
(ominous music continues)
(ominous music continues)
Where are the keys?
Hey! Hey, the keys!
Uh, they're on my desk!
Help me close this door.
Hurry!
(door thuds)
(Lennox grunts)
(Gino grunts)
(keys clinking)
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Where do you think you're going?
Away from here!
No, no! What about the
guy that we, no, no, no!
Listen. I am an independent contractor.
Whatever this is, is not
in my job description!
This is an Ackerman problem!
They must sort it out, for themselves!
Where are my fucking keys?
(footsteps clacking)
(lock clicks) (Gino groans)
Oh, dude.
That sounded odious.
May I suggest we
make like the good doctor
and blow this joint?
- Killian left?
- Without hesitation.
Fuck me!
Did you lock the door behind him?
Yeah, I think so!
Unconvinced, Casey.
Okay, what are you waiting for?
I don't know.
[Casey] Check the door.
Go!
All right. So, what do we do now, boss?
- We can't leave.
- And why not?
Because my father, our
boss, will be here any minute.
Okay, but in the meantime?
(Ava sighs)
We get some answers.
(dark music)
(tarp rustles)
(Ava pants)
(hand slaps)
What the fuck is going on?
Karma.
No.
No. Benny did not deserve such a fate.
What the hell are you talking about?
You don't remember Benny?
You should. He just
saved your fucking life.
The reason I buried those fucks
was to give this cesspool
of evil some bad mojo.
Just not to this extent.
More importantly, not
with me in the thick of it.
This wasn't your doin'?
I guess you could say inadvertently.
But look.
If I had those kind of abilities,
I sure wouldn't waste them on
reanimating any of you dildos.
So, how did you find out about our place?
The night I captured your
brother, he and his goon
brought a trio of chicks here for what was
some sex type shindig.
Hm.
That's not out of character.
However, I didn't think
that he'd be stupid enough
to fuck around in Dad's safe house.
Kids get off defying their parents.
Oh, yeah?
Do you have a kid, Mr. Caruthers?
(dark music continues)
Had. Past tense.
Sorry.
Your brother wasn't!
Hence his fate!
Tyler murdered your kid?
My 19-year-old girl,
and my wife!
How can you be certain?
Because that sick fuck recorded it,
on my daughter's cell,
and then sent it to me!
Why?
How does he even know who you are?
(Gino yells)
(wife whimpers) (furniture clattering)
(wife scream) (Gino grunts wildly)
(Nash breathes heavily)
Hey. He's here.
- Hm, what was that?
- He's here.
[Ava] Oh, it's about
fuckin' time. Let's go.
No. Go get yourself cleaned up.
- Why?
- He can't see you like this.
Oh.
Change of clothes in the front closet.
Oh.
Two of everything, always.
- Right.
- Yeah.
- Thanks.
- What are number twos for?
Okay. Yeah you're not so bad, Casey.
Mm-hm.
(footsteps clacking)
(Casey gasps) (ominous music)
Lennox?
[Ava] Stay put.
Sure thing, boss.
(suspenseful music)
(suspenseful music continues)
(suspenseful music continues)
Tyler?
Leave it off!
Sorry.
Being boxed up for Satan knows how long,
it's obviously scrambled some things.
No. No apology necessary.
What happened?
I remember being
out with Gino at Diesel's.
We're drinking.
Having fun.
It's like the usual shit. Uh...
Things are obviously a little
hazy, by the end of the night.
On this occasion, I
remember waking up in a box.
Unable to move.
This man.
This horrible man.
Nash Caruthers?
(ominous music)
We have him in the chamber.
It's ironic that we
can thank your captor,
now our captee, for finding you.
(Casey chuckles)
What'd he tell you?
An entirely different story.
How did you get out, man?
My best friend saved me.
He murdered mine.
Yeah. (Chuckles)
Gino thought Benny was Caruthers.
Solitary confinement
obviously fucked him up.
Obviously.
If it's any consolation,
he feels really bad about it.
Well, it explains why
he looked so off-kiltered.
I mean, but where is he?
- Around.
- Talk about a miracle.
Thanks be to Lenora Gimble.
- Who's Lenora Gimble?
- Pops here?
No. Any minute.
I need to see Caruthers.
No, no, no, no. Dad wants him alive.
Now.
I'm not so sure that
that's a great idea, Tyler.
- You're still in shock.
- Fuck you, Ava!
This is my birthright!
Even in my current capacity,
pops would still pick me.
And you know it.
Hey! Easy, man.
How about it, sis?
Yeah. (Sighs) Like you said.
Good girl.
(door handle rattles)
Lennox, open up! Come on, Lennox!
Where are my keys?
Lennox, open up!
This isn't the time to
be fuckin' around, man!
The boss just arrived!
Lennox, open up!
[Ava] Lennox? Stay put.
Sure thing, boss.
(ominous music)
You wanna have a little
fun?
Thought you'd never ask, buttercup.
(Lennox giggles)
(door clicks shut)
(suspenseful music continues)
How you doing there, buddy?
Does that hurt?
Ooh!
Ouch.
Don't pass out on me.
(fingers clicking)
(fist thuds) (Nash groans)
(Lennox laughs)
This is gonna be fun.
(Lennox breathes deeply)
Money aside,
the main reason I wanted
in on this particular job
was so that I could witness
an underground legend
like Dr. Titus fucking
Killian do his thang!
Yeah.
I wanted to be smack in the middle of
one of those twisted tales
I've heard so much about!
Yeah, see, uh, in my youth, I'd, uh,
I'd seek out the most gruesome,
depraved, disturbing fucking horror movies
I could get my grimey
little fuckin' paws on!
And I just, oh, I watched
the shit outta them.
Ah, back in the good old
glorious days of VHS. (Sighs)
Cannon fucking Films.
Yes!
Yeah, right.
You get it.
They were cool.
They were cool, but uh, my main jam
were the movies the Italians
were making in the 70s and 80s.
Yeah. Those fuckers know gore.
Like the fucking slashing
and the fucking stabbing!
And fuck this! (Groans)
Fuck! I love that shit.
Um...
Movies like, uh...
(sighs) "Burial Ground".
And, uh...
"Zombie".
That's a good one.
And, um...
"Anthropophagus"!
I mean, what does that even fucking mean?
It's like cannibals and
there's blood, and they...
(grunts) Fuckin' blood and like... (grunts)
Fuck, I love that shit. I love the blood!
I love the blood. (Pants)
Anyway, uh...
Long-ass story short... (pants)
I was thinking this might
be my opportunity to finally
see Mondo in the flesh.
Sadly, Dr. Killian is no longer with us.
And that leaves me
feeling a little deprived.
And that really bums me out, man.
Like...
But...
I think to myself.
Here I am,
in that torture porn capital of Chasden
with all of the doctor's
dastardly gear at my disposal.
And I think to myself...
I think...
(Lennox chuckles)
"Why don't I make my very own snuff movie?"
(ominous music continues)
You got issues, boy.
Yeah.
I do. I fucking do.
I do, but this whole operation's
going up in flames anyway,
so why not make the most of it?
Ah.
When your world is crashed, set it on fire.
Exactly.
Now, where do we start?
Hey. Can I have one last request?
Why not?
I'm really feelin' that
mean machete down there.
Where?
Down there. Take a look.
Look under the hood.
(machete scrapes) (Lennox giggles)
Fondness for Voorhees, huh?
Nah.
"Commando".
Commando.
(Lennox chuckles)
You know...
You're all right, Nash!
Call me Mr. Caruthers.
Kick out the jams, motherfucker!
Oh, ho-ho-ho-ho-ho!
(Nash grunts) (flesh squelches)
Holy shit!
Holy fuck! (Nash grunts)
(Nash grunts)
(Barbwire snaps)
Ooh!
(Lennox laughs)
Oh, yes!
Yeah!
Yeah!
Oh, fuckin' A!
(Nash laughs)
(fist thuds) (machete clatters)
(body thumps)
(Nash groans)
Fuck!
(Nash groans)
(Nash pants)
Ah, fuck!
Cock fuck!
(Nash grunts)
(Nash pants)
Fuck!
(flesh squelches)
(Nash groans)
(flesh squelches) (Nash groans)
God damn it.
Fuck!
Bitch!
(Nash pants)
Lennox, open up! (Knocks on door)
Come on, Lennox!
(knocks on door) Lennox!
Open the door!
Screw it. I say we leave
Out of the question.
Tyler, we have two of our
own people, okay? Probably more.
They knew the risks.
Fuck this place!
This place has served only
two functions for our family!
One, being to extract
information from helpless captives,
and the other being ruthless retribution
towards helpless captives, okay?
The point is that the deck is
always stacked in our favor,
with absolutely zero risk.
This is that 0.01% chance
where it swings the other way.
(tarp rustles)
It is what it is.
(chop thuds)
Oh, God!
Oh, my God, Lennox! What happened?
(flesh squelches) (blood splatters)
(explosion thumps) (ominous music)
(hurried footsteps clacking)
(body thumps)
[Ava] Daddy?
Hello, pumpkin.
My boy.
I thought I lost you.
What the fuck?
You look like shit, son.
We need to get some
food inside you, and fast.
Ava, order us some
Burgers, Burgers, Burgers.
Everyone good with
Burgers, Burgers, Burgers?
- I'm good, Pops.
- Nonsense.
Yeah, I said I'm good!
Suit yourself.
Daddy!
That wasn't a family, was it?
Good.
No harm, no foul.
Father! What the fuck is that?
Whoops. (Chuckles)
My bad. (Chuckles)
Flashback, shall we?
(upbeat surf rock music)
You were just gonna bail the scene, Titus.
I'm shocked..
Not to mention disappointed.
I was...
I'm aware this particular situation
is out of the ordinary.
But
the status quo,
my status quo,
can never,
will never be disrupted.
The walking dead.
Ah, the devil himself
is not above me!
I was afraid!
Oh, the kicker.
You fear someone,
something,
more than you do
Russell Ackerman?
That's what hurts the most.
Oh!
A little secret.
I've been taking Muay
Thai lessons for some time.
My kicks are a work in progress, but...
My elbows.
Good luck replacing me!
Like, you gonna get Ketomaki?
He's a fucking hack!
There is no room on
one mountain for two tigers!
(tiger growls)
(flesh squelches) Voila.
[Tyler] Where's Gino?
(aggressive heavy metal
music) (head thumps)
(head thumps) (blood squelches)
[Russell] You know me and loose ends.
(head thumps)
He was far gone, son.
(sighs) I put him out of his misery.
And done you a world of good.
(sighs) Plus, Gino was a lousy friend.
What're you waiting for, princess?
The least you can do is
bring these boys some drinks!
(sighs)
In my car, you'll find the
good stuff in the trunk.
Bring it in.
This is going to be a
very special occasion.
(dark music)
(dark music continues)
(dark music continues)
[Tyler] Thanks be to Lenora Gimble.
(dark music continues)
The town of Chasden
is known for its affable,
peaceful nature.
This is a place that's been
voted, on several occasions,
the most tranquil in the country.
This is a place that
people come to escape to,
to get away from this chaos of city life,
perhaps to start a family.
This is something this
reporter can attest to.
There's no more closer-knit community
than the one you'll find here in Chasden.
Crime?
We're talking zero murder rate.
That was, until that fateful
night on August 12th, 1986.
An incident so shocking
that its ripple effect would
change this beautiful town
and its good, decent inhabitants forever.
("Moonlight Sonata")
(locks click) (ominous music)
(ominous music continues)
("Moonlight Sonata" continues)
("Moonlight Sonata" continues)
Mr. Nash Caruthers.
We finally meet.
(Russell chuckles)
We've mistreated
a great deal of individuals in the
very spot
you now find yourself in.
Decades worth of pain,
suffering,
reside in the DNA of this room.
Can ya feel it?
Despite your worst intentions,
the Ackermans stand as strong as ever!
Don't you wanna know
what your little shit did
to deserve being on the
receiving end of my warpath?
Let me guess.
Uh...
He took advantage of your daughter?
Or, uh, perhaps...
Judging by, uh, this photo... (chuckles)
Your lovely wife.
He murdered them both!
Is this true?
O Tyler.
Did you indeed slay the women in his life?
Definitely.
Was it avoidable?
Definitely.
Oh-oh, do you have any other children?
Or, uh,
perhaps a mistress
to live for?
Yeah.
You know, as a fellow dad,
I would like to do the unprecedented thing
and spare your life.
Now, there's been no real harm done,
except, well, perhaps
on the psychological side,
which, which can be mended with therapy.
Regrettably, I...
I am opposed to loose ends.
Call it a compulsion. A...
It is... (chuckles)
What it is.
Oh, FYI. (Gasps)
On the drive over here, I
loathed you to the umpth degree.
I was fully prepared to rain
down unspeakable rage on your
body, mind and soul!
(Russel sighs)
But... (Nash groans)
But...
The man standing
before you at this juncture
is the very model of, uh, impassive.
Now, whether that means you
suffer more or, uh,
less than you would've in my, uh,
previous state, is another
question altogether.
(Nash groans)
Do tell me... (nail gun buzzes)
Which way
your experience goes
during these
your final moments...
You're boring me, fuck-face.
If all that hot air is supposed
to give me the willies,
that's a huge fail.
I got nothin' to lose.
So, your worst, at the very
best, might just piss me off!
(nail gun buzzes)
Stop!
This better be fucking important, Ava!
We need to leave, now.
Reason being? (Nash groans)
Lenora Gimble.
(Russell sighs)
Patience...
dissipating.
What about that cunt?
Were you aware that she
was murdered and buried
on this property, 30 years ago?
Yeah!
Did you have a hand in her death?
But of course!
Lenora was the Chamber
of Terror's very first patron.
Why?
Because I was asked,
by a few concerned citizens,
if I could talk some sense into Lenora.
They believed she was a bonafide witch
that would curse the town.
Needless to say, I chalked
Lenora up as the local loon
with knowledge of Chasden's seedier side,
prepared to expose the
town for what it really is.
You know how important Chasden's
goodie-two-shoes persona is to them!
(Russell sighs)
In a nutshell, I came to the
conclusion that the best manner
of dealing with meddlers
is to paint a vivid picture
that would ripple down
through generations to come!
Actually...
This painting is a snapshot
of that joyous occasion.
Those are my hands on that nail gun.
This trusty nail gun.
And why have you never
told us this story before?
Because it didn't
concern any of you. (Scoffs)
Lenora was my very first masterpiece!
She served no purpose, six feet under.
What are you talking about?
I went back and dug
her up, a few months ago,
and brought, well, what
remained of her, here...
right where she belongs!
[Lenora] Why?!
Why are you doing this, mister?!
I didn't do anything wrong! (Sobs)
Please! Please don't hurt me. (Sobs)
God. Lenora?
[Lenora's voice] Which you then replied:
[Russell's voice] The Lord giveth.
[Russell's voice] The Chamber taketh away.
(generator shuts down)
(Tyler screams)
(flesh squelches and tears)
(Tyler splutters and chokes)
(generator turns on)
[Russell] Oh, fuck!
What the fuck?
It's jammed! It's jammed!
- [Russell] Shut the fuck up!
- [Casey] Fuck off, man!
[Russell] Ava, what the
fuck do you think you're doing?
Fuck you, Russell! We need help!
We can trust you, right?
- For the time being.
- That'll do.
(Casey and Russell yell indistinctly)
My son! Why? (Casey screams)
(Russell screams) (intense music)
(flesh tears) (blood splatters)
(door slams)
That should hold
it for a bit. Let's split.
We can't leave.
(suspenseful music)
(Casey pants)
(Casey screams)
(supernatural scream)
(leather creaks)
You see? This is Lucifer's pad now.
Best we stay out of his affairs.
Don't you feel the least bit responsible?
My scheme to exact revenge
tanked somewhere along the way,
yet, somehow, retribution
was served nonetheless,
which goes to show your family's fate
was doomed to end
tonight, one way or another.
Uh, yeah. You didn't answer my question.
Look here, little miss.
I haven't decided what
I should do with you yet.
You saving my ass has complicated shit.
So, for your sake, don't uncomplicate it!
We can't leave.
Not after unwittingly unleashing a plague!
You heard your father.
This town was in on that poor girl's death!
The town of Chasden
deserves what's coming to it.
Including the innocent?
All right.
How do you propose we go
about killing what's already dead?
I don't know.
How'd you find out all
that stuff about Lenora?
YouTube.
Okay. For starters, we gotta
find out where she's buried.
Where do you guys traditionally
dispose of your victims?
I also don't know that. Um...
It's a long story, but this
is my first day on the job.
My father kept me away
from the unsavory cases,
such as yourself, until today, so...
No whiff of a stale fart? A rumor?
No. They definitely knew better.
I wish you would've guilted me
into saving this shithole town sooner.
If I knew we needed that
piece of shit father of yours
in one piece a little while longer,
I would've put in some
effort to save the prick.
Ah, forget it.
It's a lost cause. We tried.
No, no, no. Well, I, uh...
The maintenance room. Oh! Ah!
You know, if we, um, find her remains...
Okay, so, hear me out.
If we find her remains,
which has got to be hidden here somewhere
and give her, I don't
know, like a proper funeral,
then this nightmare will have to end.
Right? (Chuckles)
If we're gonna do this,
we gotta go balls-deep.
Oh.
No turning back.
Are you ready for that?
Um, (stutters) I don't
know about "balls-deep".
(leather creaks) Oh.
Balls.
Deep.
Okay.
Yeah, sure. Deep, deep, deep it is.
(suspenseful music continues)
(suspenseful music continues)
(car door clicks open)
(car door slams)
(car starts) (brooding synth rock music)
(brooding synth rock music continues)
(brooding synth rock music continues)
(trap clinks)
(car door clicks open)
(car door slams)
Okay.
So, this is, this is
your van. I got that part.
You are a human Swiss Army knife. Check.
There's just one thing I can't grasp.
After you dumped my brother and his crew
in the maintenance room,
you hid this van in the woods?
Yep.
You're not from around here.
Nope.
So, how the fuck did you get back home?
(gravel crunches under tires)
(phone rings)
(phone rings)
(phone rings)
Hello?
[Ava] Hi, um, is this the
priest of the household?
I am he. To whom am I speaking?
[Ava] Ava Ackerdoe. (Clears throat)
Ava Doe.
How may I be of assistance?
[Ava] Firstly, I do
apologize for the late call,
but unfortunately, it couldn't be helped.
Is there any way that we can
speak in person like right now?
(sighs) Ms. Doe, it is awfully late.
[Ava] Please, Father. This
is of the utmost importance.
I assure you.
What's this concerning?
[Ava] It's just, it's just if
I tell you over the phone,
you'll hang up.
I know I would.
You don't know that, my child.
Please. I'm all ears.
(garbled chatter from phone)
(Montoya chuckles)
(phone clacks)
(Montoya sighs)
(switch clicks)
(Montoya sniffs)
(ominous tones)
(whoosh)
(Montoya screams)
(head thumps)
(body thumps)
(upbeat surf rock music)
(upbeat surf rock music continues)
We are sorry for inconveniencing you.
Okay but this really, really
is a matter of life or death,
for the citizens of Chasden.
There is, like, this entity.
We need you to perform
a way-past-due funeral!
Yeah.
It's kind of like an exorcism,
just without all of the
vomiting and insults,
objects flying around.
Hopefully.
(chuckles) Easy peasy.
As soon as private mass is
done, we will take you back home,
along with an extremely
generous donation to the church.
Don't do anything fuckin' stupid!
Language, Caruthers!
(Ava chuckles)
(Ava sighs)
(tape tears) (Montoya groans)
You can both understand
how all this sounds on my end?
Yes. Okay, yes, totally.
And, and I apologize that we
have to dispense with the usual
you know, like, "What up,
who are you, who am I?"
(chuckles) Formalities.
Unfortunately, time is not on our side.
So, you're gonna have to just get by
with the whole faith angle, you know,
that the Church swears by.
Who is the soul we're laying to rest?
She's been dead as a
doornail for quite some time.
What's her name?
Lenora... You'll find out in due time!
For me to perform a
funeral, there are certain things
I would need, in order for it to be valid.
You can't just fake through it,
or it won't have the
effect you're looking for.
Yes. Okay, so way ahead of you.
I took the liberty of packing
your wardrobe, rosary,
cross, and the Good Book.
There's one more thing. Without it-
- Covered!
- Not alcohol.
Though, to be frank, I wouldn't mind some.
This is the hardest liquor
on God's semi-green earth, God damn it.
And that would be?
(crickets chirp) (somber organ music)
(flask rattles) (alcohol trickles)
(water sizzles)
(water trickles)
(whoosh)
Okay, so, are we missing anything else?
(Montoya sighs)
(engine hums) (surf rock music)
(brakes squeak)
(surf rock continues)
Well, it hasn't tripped
yet, so that's a good sign.
It's what's inside that counts.
(Door locked) - Okay, so
considering that poor girl
was this place's first
victim, my gut tells me
that my father would
keep her remains here for
sentimental reasons.
And where would that be?
I've got a hunch.
You got a lot of hunches.
That's true.
I'm gonna give the vicar here a tour.
An unmotivated priest isn't
gonna do us a lick of good.
Parson?
Don't do anything stupid.
I might've been raised
Catholic, but that doesn't mean
I'm gonna hesitate putting a
giant manhole in your chest!
Okay, so, what he means to say
is that you are the only clergyman in town.
So, if we fail, well, you'd be failing God.
(eerie music)
(eerie music continues)
(eerie music continues)
(eerie music continues)
[Nash] I got you covered.
(eerie music continues)
Miss, um, Doe.
Actually, her name's Ava.
And you call me Mr. Caruthers.
All right, Mr. Caruthers.
If I heard correctly, did
Ava mention a Lenora?
She wouldn't be referring to Lenora Gimble?
Bingo.
(Montoya chuckles)
But she's been missing for-
More like dead for 25 years.
How do you know this?
I'll tell you the whole
story, if we get outta this.
(suspenseful music)
(suspenseful music continues)
(tarp rustles)
Fuck!
[Nash] Anti-Heaven, in the flesh.
(ominous ghostly voice)
Crap. She's out.
(ominous ghostly voice)
(Lenora wheezes)
(suspenseful music continues)
(suspenseful music continues)
(suspenseful music continues)
(Lenora wheezes)
[Lenora] Father
Montoya.
Do I know you?
Lenora, you've got your revenge.
Lenora Gimble?
[Lenora] I've only
just begun.
Who's left?
[Lenora] The town of Chasden.
The spawns of the people that wronged you
had nothing to do with your murder!
[Lenora] Guilty by association. (Wheezes)
You of all should know.
(gun fires) (ominous music)
What have you done?
Tranquilized the ghost chick.
"Tranquilized"?
You just murdered a troubled woman
in need of professional help!
You can't kill what's already dead.
(ominous music continues)
(Nash groans)
(Lenora screams) (flesh squelches)
(Montoya gasps)
(footsteps clacking)
(leather creaks)
The fuck away from me.
(Nash grunts)
(hurried footsteps clacking)
Found it! (Montoya gasps)
Oh, sorry.
(Ava chuckles)
What, what, what's up?
You guys look like you just seen a ghost.
(Ava gasps)
Really?
You're tellin' me you
didn't hear all that racket?
Come to think of it, it
was unusually stilly in there.
Ah, fuck this shit.
Oh, pardon his French.
Again.
(Montoya sighs)
(Montoya gasps)
(Montoya retches)
I see you've met my family.
(flesh squelches)
(ominous music)
(tarp rustles)
(bones clatter)
(Montoya coughs)
How do you know that's her?
Because that there is the
Succubus Death Ecstasy logo.
Cut and dried, eh?
The shoe fits.
Yeah, I'll take your word for it.
Are you sure that I'll be of use to you?
(ominous electric guitar drones)
(suspenseful music)
(Nash mumbles)
All right.
Let's see what we can do with this.
Ah, this is gonna be one hell of a party.
Oh.
Where's the ugly beige suit?
Oh, I mean, it didn't
work. Yeah, lots of blood.
What're you up to?
This witch is likely to put
up a fight. I need some fuel!
Fuel?
You nearly killed me,
and when I say nearly,
I mean not even fuckin' close.
I was kinda like a little bit close.
Where did you get this?
You people are drug dealers, aren't you?
Yes. It's one of the
operations my father runs.
Ran. Past tense.
Oh, that's so right.
You're planning on seducing
the dead with cocaine?
No!
Uh...
No, thank you.
Suit yourself.
Okay, how do I do this?
How the fuck do you do this shit?
Do you snort, increments, what?
I don't know! It's not
my area of expertise!
What kind of mobster are you?
Like the very recently retired kind!
Wait a minute. You've
never done this before?
Of course not!
Then why the fuck are
you starting right now?
Because this Congo line
is gonna Popeye me up!
That's what it's gonna do!
- Who the fuck is Popeye?!
[Nash] Fuckin' Millennials!
[Ava] Seriously, who's he
And what the fuck does
he have to do with this?
He's a cartoon sailor who-
Focus!
(Montoya chuckles)
Popeye himself isn't
really that important.
But once he gets his hands on
some spinach and gulps it down
he gets these like superpowers
and he can kick anyone's
fucking butt for a limited amount of time!
(leather creaks)
Okay.
Not only is that concept asinine,
but that you correlate eating
spinach to snorting cocaine!
Got any better ideas?
No.
Mass!
Now!
(suspenseful music continues)
Our father in heaven,
we thank you that through Jesus Christ,
you have given us the gift of eternal life.
All right, if the drugs don't kill me,
whatever the hell we're dealing with, will.
Either way, you win. Unless
you bite the bullet, too.
You've got a death wish, Caruthers.
Where would be the fun in that?
(Nash sighs)
Let's party!
(ominous rock music)
Fuck yeah!
(body thumps)
Um...
Uh...
(Montoya speaks Latin)
- Nash, Nash.
Shit.
Nash.
(Montoya speaks Latin)
- Shit.
(Montoya speaks Latin)
Amen.
When the time has come,
let us depart in peace
and see you face to face.
For you are the Lord of our salvation.
Congregation. Amen.
Congregation!
Yeah! Uh, Amen!
Is that it?
Father?
(suspenseful music)
(Lenora screams)
Rest in peace, Lenora.
(eerie tones)
Shit.
Caruthers. (Foot thuds)
Caruthers! (Foot thuds)
Ava! (Ava gasps)
Who's out there?
[Tyler] It's me. Tyler.
[Russell] And Daddy.
(gun cocks)
(Ava sighs)
Fuck that.
[Russell] Our memory's a little hazy.
All I know is we've
been given another shot,
and I'm not gonna squander it.
I apologize.
Honey, I bought you ice cream
when you were a little kid!
I bought you... (gun fires)
How could you?
Obviously, you never met Russell.
Because if you did, you know
that there's not a traumatic
situation in hell that
could unblacken his heart.
(Ava pants)
Father?
Are you sure that you
completed the ceremony?
(Lenora wheezes) (flesh squelches)
(body thumps) (ominous music)
(flesh squelches) (blood splatters)
(Lenora wheezes)
(Ava gasps)
(flesh squelches)
(body thumps) (Ava grunts)
(ominous music continues)
(ominous music continues)
[Lenora] It's
futile,
Ava!
The Ackerman
bloodline
ends
here.
Oh. (Gasps)
(bones crack) (ominous music continues)
(ominous music continues)
Lenora.
What my father did to you was unforgivable.
I understand why you want my family dead.
Why you want me dead. (Lenora wheezes)
Okay, I turned a blind
eye on this place for years.
Naively, I just thought that
everybody here had it coming.
But I now know that I was wrong.
You showed me that.
Okay? So, so please.
You can kill me.
Okay? But please just
let that be the end of it.
(Lenora wheezes)
(Lenora wheezes) (ominous music continues)
The acceptance
of your
fate
is
Appreciated.
It
Does not
absolve
the town
of
Chasden.
It
Must
and
will
be
Eradicated.
Right behind ya, pizza face.
(Nash grunts) (flesh squelches)
(flesh squelches) (bloody splatters)
(fist thuds) (Nash grunts)
(fist thuds)
(door clicks open)
(Nash grunts)
(head thumps)
(Nash grunts)
(footsteps clacking)
(flesh squelches)
(moody synth music)
Crap.
Does this mean I'm gonna be
on a strict blood sucker diet?
If so, stake me, pronto.
No.
Well...
No, no, no, no.
I've, I've never heard of a ghost vamp,
and her being the host, now being dead,
I think that puts you in the clear.
Beautiful.
(tooth squelches)
Don't beat yourself up, kiddo.
She was consumed by hate.
Yeah.
This was the inevitable
conclusion to her story.
[Ava] Mr. Caruthers?
Call me N.C.
Oh.
Okay. (Chuckles)
N.C.
Have you finally made a decision
concerning the remaining Ackerman?
I'll let you live to tell the tale.
- Need a ride home?
- Oh. (Chuckles)
No, thanks. I think I ought a
stay and clean up the mess.
Yeah, about that. I got a
90-second solution for ya.
Okay.
(gasps) Oh.
What's this?
If I were you, I'd have my car started,
out front, door wide open.
Then burn rubber, baby, and I mean it.
Who are you?
(Nash scoffs)
(van starts)
[Narrator] Like I said at the start,
this tale is 99% factual.
We don't actually know
if the C4 was the catalyst
for the destruction of
this cesspool of evil.
And what about Ava
Ackerman and Nash Caruthers,
the unlikely duo of heroes
who had to trek to hell and back
to discover their place
in this topsy-turvy world we live in?
Ava's whereabouts are unknown at this time,
but I'd like to think that
she's doing just fine.
And as for Mr. (clears throat) Caruthers,
he is about to enter
the once tranquil site,
unceremoniously known
as Camp Gore.
Here, he will face, again,
unbeknownst to himself,
the greatest adversity imaginable.
(machete scrapes)
But that, my friends,
is another tale entirely.
(eerie whispering tones)
(moody synth rock music)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(engine roars) (heavy metal music)
[Narrator] It's been
said that within all of us,
there is a hero prepared
to rise against the odds,
regardless of how
insurmountable they may appear.
Just so happens at this particular moment,
a hero, unbeknownst to himself,
is entombed within the
trunk of this moving vehicle.
But... (chuckles)
I'm getting ahead of myself.
Let me take you back a bit.
And yes, this tale of the
macabre is in fact 99% factual.
(Tyler groans)
(Tyler groans and whimpers)
(Tyler pants and grunts)
(plastic tears)
(Tyler yelps)
(Tyler pants) (ominous music)
Thank you. Oh, thank God.
Oh, my God. Thank you.
Oh, for a second there.
I thought I was a goner.
Oh. (Pants)
Oh, thanks a mil, Mister, uh...
It's cool.
Yeah, we got plenty of time
to get acquainted. (Pants)
As soon as you get me outta this pickle.
For the life of me, I can't
figure out how I got here,
or where here is, for that matter.
(feet stomp rhythmically)
A wooden box.
(hands slap)
Coffin!
Awesome.
You know, the sooner you get me outta here,
the better it's gonna
be for the both of us,
'cause you just hit the
jackpot, 'cause my name's-
Tyler Ackerman.
Son of mobster scum-fuck Russell Ackerman.
Look, whatever my father likely did
has got nothing to fucking do with me.
This has nothing to do with your father,
per se.
9.9 times out of 10, he
would be the sole guilty party.
I did drop a "per se",
and for a high school
dropout, such as yourself,
the definition being...
(Nash sighs) (phone keypad clicks)
[Phone] By or in itself,
or oneself, or themselves.
So, you see, your father's on my...
Along with you and your crony.
(ominous music continues)
(ominous music continues)
Now you know why you're in this pickle?
I don't, I, I...
My friends call me "N.C.".
Since we're in no God damn way that,
you will call me
Mr. Fucking Caruthers!
Mr. Caruthers.
Mr. Fucking Caruthers!
Okay, okay, okay, okay!
Mr. Fucking Caruthers.
Whoever told you what you think I did
is a liar.
(leather creaks)
(screaming and clattering from phone)
That was a wrong place,
wrong time type of thing.
You gotta understand, it's just business.
I mean...
Hey, stop. What're you doing?
Stop. Don't you, don't you fucking dare!
Fuck you! You fucking loser.
You fuck! (Hammer thudding)
Oh, you're a dead man!
You're so fucking dead!
(Tyler grunts) (hammer thudding)
Come on, you little fuck!
Come back, come back!
Please, please, just come back.
Just, come on! I, I...
(door slams) (Tyler pants)
(door thuds) (Tyler pants)
(ominous music continues)
(wood snaps)
(Tyler pants)
(ominous music continues)
(ominous music continues)
(Tyler screams)
(dark synth music)
(dark synth music continues)
(dark synth music continues)
(dark synth music continues)
(dark synth music continues)
(dark synth music continues)
(dark synth music continues)
(dark synth music continues)
(dark synth music continues)
(dark synth music continues)
(crowd yelling)
(muffled yelling)
(door clicks open)
(door thuds) (keys clinking)
(refrigerator hums)
(Nash sighs)
(refrigerator door slams)
(muffled footsteps clacking)
(door creaks)
(bottles clinking)
(door creaks)
(keys clinking)
(refrigerator hums) (bottles clinking)
(refrigerator door slams)
(refrigerator hums) (bottles clinking)
(refrigerator door slams)
(bottles clinking)
(onion crunches)
(refrigerator door slams)
(footsteps clacking)
(bottle hisses)
(Nash spits) (cap clatters)
(muffled gunfire)
(distant civilian screams)
(moody synth music)
[Video Game Announcer] Suburban Fighter.
(gunfire from TV)
Gnarly.
Wicked.
(gunfire from TV)
Dope move.
(knocks on door)
(lively video game music)
(ominous music)
(Nash sighs)
(brick thuds) (Lennox groans)
(fist thuds)
(door creaks)
(door slams)
(Lennox spits)
[Lennox] Motherfucker broke my tooth!
Teeth.
Plural.
[Lennox] Oh, you.
I foresee dentures in your
immediate fucking future!
Lennox! Cool the fuck out, man!
No, we need this guy alive!
No, if he croaks, our employer's
gonna fuck us to the max
before ever lets us live!
Clear enough picture for you?
Oh, for fuck sakes, man!
Oh, fuck. You really did this time.
Fuck.
What? He's, uh...
He's dead?
Yeah, shit for brains.
I mean, this is basic cause and effect.
You repeatedly stomp on a man's skull,
chances of him expiring
are pretty colossal!
Oh, fuck!
I mean, this dude isn't young either.
If the blunt force trauma
doesn't do him in, then I mean,
his bad ticker's gonna.
Uh...
I didn't mean to. He just...
Yeah. You feel like shit?
Yeah. You ought a.
Fuck! To think I vouched
for you for this gig!
You, you just dug my own
grave, alongside your fuckin' own!
Oh, Casey, I'm sorry!
I just have this temper.
And I just wanna fucking
punch things and... (grunts)
Oh, my God, chill out!
Are you nuts?
(chuckles) It's a joke.
This is a fucking joke.
(Lennox pants)
(Casey chuckles)
Why would you do that? I
could've concussed myself.
Oh, my God. I mean, it must hurt.
- Yeah?
- Yeah, I mean...
- A little bit, yeah.
- Yeah, okay.
Too bad. Pick up the piece of shit.
(Lennox sighs) (door creaks)
You son of a bitch!
(birds chirping) (ominous music)
(ominous music continues)
(ominous music continues)
(ominous music continues)
(ominous music continues)
(ominous music continues)
(moody electronic dance music)
(moody electronic dance music continues)
(moody electronic dance music continues)
(moody electronic dance music continues)
Look into my eyes
Gonna find it hard to leave
Look into my eyes
Gonna see what you can't see
When you take my hand
Show you the way.
(tarp rustles)
(muffled dance music from earphones)
Seriously, B?
Don't at me, Ava.
I'm working as hard as
I can, as fast as I can.
Yeah, that's not what I meant.
However, since you mentioned
it, this floor doesn't look
any less vomit-inducing
than when you started.
Yeah, well, no amount
of hard work is gonna
make this place not look
like the bowels of hell.
And what did I do to
deserve this: Seriously, B
comment?
Oh, yeah. That.
Well, as you know, I'm tough as an ox,
but weak when it comes to certain scents.
Brain matter being one of them.
Now, buckets of blood I can handle,
but when it comes to this shit,
instant projectile. I just-
Okay, so where's your trusty face mask
to deal with this sort of dilemma?
(Benny chuckles)
Two words. Casey fuckin' Flanagan.
Ugh. That's three words.
And also, say no more.
Bitch gloated that she
flushed it, alongside her turd.
(Ava sighs)
Who does that?
Anyway, my savior of
two years, gone forever.
You know you're like
twice her size, right? So how?
And, sorry, why do you
let her push you around?
Because my mate since elementary school
decided to promote that
jabroni to her number one lap dog,
and seniority is a bitch.
Mm.
You know that I had absolutely
nothing to do with that.
Besides, even if I did,
your emesis problem would
be a very tough sell, Benny.
- I'm sorry.
- Bane of my existence.
Yeah. But we'll always be BFFs.
Yeah, well, if it doesn't
get me out of custodial duties,
it amounts to dick-all.
Okay. Benny, my sweet?
- Yes?
- Hurry the fuck up.
I wanna go home.
Yeah, yeah. (Scoffs)
(doorbell rings)
(moody electronic dance music)
Yeah. Yes?
(Ava clears throat)
Yes?
[Killian] A, B, C. One, two, three.
(door creaks)
Dr. Killian?
You brought us dinner.
How very out of character.
I am never out of character.
(footsteps clacking)
Okay.
I just... Could you be so kind?
(bag rustles)
(footsteps clacking)
I, um, I'm confused.
What are you doing back again so soon?
Did your father not notify you?
No. That's a pattern, I'm afraid.
It's just, you usually only
do one house call a day.
Tonight is that million-dollar exception.
Oh, and your father is en route.
Oh.
Who could it be?
I think you may know.
(bag rustles)
(gentle harpsichord music)
Shit.
(engine roars) (muffled heavy metal music)
(heavy metal music)
(footsteps clacking)
What is the meaning of this?
What do you mean?
Clean as a whistle, Cochise.
(hurried footsteps clacking)
Who told you to clean up?
It's my job, man. That's
what I do around here.
A grotesque aftermath does half the job!
Put it back as it was!
(Killian yells in foreign language)
Come on. Come on!
- Come on.
- Fuck, Benny!
(hurried footsteps clacking) (Benny sighs)
Fuckin' horse shit!
(muffled heavy metal music)
(muffled heavy metal music)
(birds chirping)
(car door clicks open)
(car door slams)
(trunk door squeaks)
Final destination, asshole.
(Casey chuckles)
(fist thuds)
(tarp rustles) (Lennox pants)
Loving the Hammer Horror
meets torture porn crossover.
Don't mind my com padre.
He's a huge horror junkie.
Where do you want him?
The, uh, (chuckles) chair of doom.
Oh, this place is
getting better and better!
(body thumps)
(footsteps clacking)
The deadbeat of the day is
ready for maximum displeasure.
How often did you barge into the office,
when my brother was running things?
He wouldn't have minded.
That's not what I asked.
Dressed to impress tonight, Casey?
Do you have any word on Tyler?
(clears throat) No.
But apparently that fellow you
picked up may know something.
Really?
Yeah, my father's so certain,
he had the doc come back again tonight.
Ooh! Twice within 24 hours?
Now, that's unprecedented.
Mm-hm.
Appears to be the theme
of the evening, I'm afraid.
Yeah. You don't have
to tell me that twice.
(both chuckle)
(footsteps clacking)
(tarp rustles)
(knife clacks)
(Lennox chuckles)
Mm!
No one told me there'd be
eye candy up in this hellhole.
Dressed to impress.
[Lennox] And passed with flyin' colors!
(Benny groans)
Yeah.
You. (Benny sighs)
Me.
(gun thuds) (Lennox groans)
Your batting average
is for shit thus far.
A word of advice, shut the
fuck up until I say otherwise,
and we might just live
to see beyond tonight.
To the uninitiated.
Ouch.
My name is Ava.
Ava Ackerman.
And as of today,
I will be taking over
the role of Underboss.
I know, I know.
A woman (chuckles)
in an authoritarian role,
in this line of work.
Well, you're just going
to have to get used to it
for the time being.
This isn't a "fuck the patriarchy" moment.
It's a case of my
presently missing brother.
(Nash laughs)
Like I was saying.
I will be filling in for my
brother, for the time being.
And if I were you, I would save my energy
until my father arrives.
You're gonna wish that you did.
(Nash mumbles)
(Ava scoffs)
Okay, fine. Sure.
I guess a sneak preview wouldn't hurt.
(bag rustles)
You guys put that on really fuckin' tight.
What's with the shades?
Okay.
I'll chalk it up to a
last request. (Chuckles)
Oh, yeah.
I can see Dr. Killian getting
a real kick working on you.
[Nash] Fuck you.
Oh, fuck me? (Chuckles) Fuck me?
I gather he's not on your radar, right?
'Cause if he was, you would've
surely shit yourself by now.
(Nash chuckles)
You have something really
important to say, don't you?
And it just can't wait.
Whoa. I don't think
that's such a hot idea, Ava.
- I say do it.
- You would.
What's that supposed to mean?
Well, maybe I'm implying that
you wouldn't mind seeing
Ava fuck up on day one.
Yeah? And what would I gain from that?
Well, you're hoping
and thinking, everything.
- You're way off, lap dog.
- Man, sit and spin, bitch!
What the fuck did you say?
(hand thuds)
(Casey blows)
(Benny sighs)
How about it?
Mister...
Casey, Mister?
Uh, Nash Caruthers.
(chuckles) Caruthers.
How about it, Mr. Caruthers?
Would I be making a grave mistake,
removing the tape from your mouth?
(Nash grunts)
Do you have something to
say concerning my brother
that just cannot wait a couple hours more?
(tape tears)
Well, the floor is yours.
For your sake, don't waste it.
Can we rewind things a little bit?
Rewind things?
I was finishing your sentence,
but it was muted by the tape.
If you could go back a couple of lines,
I'd gladly repeat what I said.
Mm.
You like games. Don't you, Mr. Caruthers?
I don't.
I just think without the setup,
what I'm gonna say is
gonna lose the desired effect.
I'm not fucking around,
stalling, 'cause like you said,
Big Daddy Ackerman is
still a couple of hours away.
Now, if what I say doesn't get a reaction,
which I know it will,
all you have to do is gag me up again.
Your only worry
will be that little fuckin'
retarded, worthless
fucktard who totally screams snitch.
Hm.
But that's a you problem.
I know what my problem is.
No two ways around that.
Okay.
(Ava chuckles)
Okay, fine. I'll, uh,
I'll go along with it.
So, what would you like
me to say, Mr. Director?
Just repeat what you said,
before I rudely interrupted.
Well, I talk a lot, so you're
gonna have to remind me.
(Ava chuckles)
You said...
"Yada, yada, yada."
I am woman. Hear me roar.
"It's a case of my
presently missing brother."
That's a decent memory that you have.
I wish it wasn't the case.
Okay, sure. Fuck, fuck it.
For all intent and purposes,
I will stick to your script,
because honestly, I, I don't recall, so...
- Action.
- Thanks.
(Ava clears throat)
Yada, yada, yada.
Fuck the patriarchy thing.
A case of my presently missing-
Deceased brother!
(ominous music)
How do you know that?
Take a wild guess, honey bitch.
Listen. He's full of shit, Ava.
Don't listen to him.
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah.
Then why did these stooges
put in all the effort to nab me?
Ask 'em!
All I know is this idiot left behind
a mile-wide red herring.
It's almost like he was trying to get-
Caught!
(ominous music continues)
Listen here, little miss.
I did your little mafia a world of good
by removing big brother from the equation.
Definitely not leadership material.
He was a no good,
worthless ass piece of...
(scalpel scrapes)
- Ava!
(blood splutters) Jesus Christ!
Casey, get the doc!
He's here?
He's in the cafeteria! Get him!
If this guy bleeds out, we're dead!
Go, now!
Give me your shirt,
what's-his-name! Give me your shirt!
- This is new!
- Give it to me!
- Ah fuck!
- Do it!
Yeah.
Oh, fuck!
Fuck!
(Ava whimpers)
(approaching footsteps shuffling)
Oh.
God. Thank you.
(Ava sighs)
Thought you'd wanna know that, uh,
Killian's hard at work on that perp.
(Ava sighs) (somber music)
B, I really fucked up back there.
I don't know what came over me.
I think you released a lot of tension
in the worst time and way possible.
(Ava sighs)
Between you and me,
you know, I'm just the temp Underboss.
The moment my father found out
that his golden boy slash
my kid brother was missing,
he didn't know what to do.
It was never in the cards for me
to permanently take
over the family business.
So, if Caruthers flat lines,
accept my sincerest apologies.
Hey.
You'll never have to apologize to me.
Not ever.
(Benny sighs)
Look on the bright side.
At least you achieved catharsis, huh?
(both giggling)
Fuck! (Sighs)
Yeah, fuck.
(flesh squelches)
(tarp rustles)
(scissors snip)
Doc?
Never in my wildest dreams
did I think I would be saving a life again.
Sorry.
I think some extra
zeros to my fee will suffice.
Yeah. Yeah, of course.
And if everybody else
could keep this incident,
this small, tiny, tiny little
incident to yourselves,
that would be greatly appreciated.
That goes doubly for you, Casey.
Like the doc said, some extra dough.
Fine, okay. Fuck, fine.
I will wire all of you money
by Monday morning, if he lives.
(Ava sighs)
So, boss, how you gonna spin this one?
Just, um, um...
You know, just that...
Oh, okay. I know.
Just that I took the initiative
to secure the guest myself,
and in, in the, the
process, he took the scalpel
and, and attempted suicide.
Luckily, he is one tough curv.
No quit in him.
Yet.
Thank God for that.
So...
So, when, when can we
expect him to wake up?
Hard to tell.
(Nash coughs) (ominous music)
(Nash grunts)
(chair scrapes)
(Ava sighs)
Who are you?
Okay, here's the dilemma.
On one hand, it was
extremely unprofessional of me
to do what I did to you.
Admittedly, that...
It was actually my first
act of physical violence.
On the other hand, (chuckles)
My father seems to think
that you have something to do
with the disappearance of my brother.
So, naturally, you can
understand why I did what I did.
So, I am sorry, but
actually, no, I'm not sorry.
I know
his whereabouts.
(ominous music)
No. (Chuckles)
No, no, no. Uh...
I'll wait for my father this time.
Okay.
Can we play a game?
You don't like games.
Something to pass the time.
No, no, no, no. (Chuckles)
You are an ace at pushing my buttons.
So, I think that I will go
ahead and just sit this one out.
You ever play hot and cold?
Mm.
Well, yeah. (Chuckles)
If you win,
you gain some much needed
brownie points with Daddy.
I get the impression he doesn't
have the utmost confidence
his little girl is up to the task.
This guy's trouble.
(ominous music continues)
Cold.
Extreme cold.
(chair scrapes)
Gettin' warmer.
You're gettin' warmer.
(tarp rustles)
Okay, but this isn't gonna
work from this point on.
Why don't you try your phone?
Her phone.
(footsteps clacking)
Warmish. (Suspenseful music)
Warmer, but less so.
Is it just me or is it getting toasty?
Hot!
(sucks teeth)
(suspenseful music continues)
(door creaks)
(door creaks)
All right, little miss. Take a
look and see what you've won.
(suspenseful music continues)
(door shuts)
(suspenseful music continues)
(tarp rustles)
(no audio)
("Dance of the Sugar
Plum Fairy" from earphones)
(ominous music)
Have at it, lug wrench.
(crowbar clunks)
(suspenseful music)
Nah.
(crowbar clunks)
(scoffs) Great. Perfect. Perfect.
(scoffs) Thanks a lot.
(wood creaks and cracks)
(wood creaks and cracks)
(Benny retches) (vomit splashes)
Oh, God.
I guess it's not just brain
matter that makes me queasy.
Oh.
Okay. Do, do I even wanna look?
It's bad, but it's not your brother.
Oh.
[Lennox] Yeah, but we still
got another one to go, so...
Real smooth, Mr. Tact.
I think that's Gino D'Amico.
Yeah.
Oh, it's Gino D'Amico.
Who's Gino D'Amico?
Brother's bestie.
Well... (sighs)
Onto the next.
Shall we?
Yeah?
(Benny scoffs)
(hand thuds) (Benny groans)
Oh, fuck!
Oh, fuck!
(blood drips) (Benny groans)
(Benny screams) (ominous music)
(Gino snarls) (Benny screams)
Oh, fuck!
Yeah, no.
(Ava grunts)
Lennox!
(ominous music continues)
(Killian yells in foreign language)
(Ava grunts)
(blood splatters)
(Ava gasps)
(ominous music continues)
(ominous music continues)
Where are the keys?
Hey! Hey, the keys!
Uh, they're on my desk!
Help me close this door.
Hurry!
(door thuds)
(Lennox grunts)
(Gino grunts)
(keys clinking)
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Where do you think you're going?
Away from here!
No, no! What about the
guy that we, no, no, no!
Listen. I am an independent contractor.
Whatever this is, is not
in my job description!
This is an Ackerman problem!
They must sort it out, for themselves!
Where are my fucking keys?
(footsteps clacking)
(lock clicks) (Gino groans)
Oh, dude.
That sounded odious.
May I suggest we
make like the good doctor
and blow this joint?
- Killian left?
- Without hesitation.
Fuck me!
Did you lock the door behind him?
Yeah, I think so!
Unconvinced, Casey.
Okay, what are you waiting for?
I don't know.
[Casey] Check the door.
Go!
All right. So, what do we do now, boss?
- We can't leave.
- And why not?
Because my father, our
boss, will be here any minute.
Okay, but in the meantime?
(Ava sighs)
We get some answers.
(dark music)
(tarp rustles)
(Ava pants)
(hand slaps)
What the fuck is going on?
Karma.
No.
No. Benny did not deserve such a fate.
What the hell are you talking about?
You don't remember Benny?
You should. He just
saved your fucking life.
The reason I buried those fucks
was to give this cesspool
of evil some bad mojo.
Just not to this extent.
More importantly, not
with me in the thick of it.
This wasn't your doin'?
I guess you could say inadvertently.
But look.
If I had those kind of abilities,
I sure wouldn't waste them on
reanimating any of you dildos.
So, how did you find out about our place?
The night I captured your
brother, he and his goon
brought a trio of chicks here for what was
some sex type shindig.
Hm.
That's not out of character.
However, I didn't think
that he'd be stupid enough
to fuck around in Dad's safe house.
Kids get off defying their parents.
Oh, yeah?
Do you have a kid, Mr. Caruthers?
(dark music continues)
Had. Past tense.
Sorry.
Your brother wasn't!
Hence his fate!
Tyler murdered your kid?
My 19-year-old girl,
and my wife!
How can you be certain?
Because that sick fuck recorded it,
on my daughter's cell,
and then sent it to me!
Why?
How does he even know who you are?
(Gino yells)
(wife whimpers) (furniture clattering)
(wife scream) (Gino grunts wildly)
(Nash breathes heavily)
Hey. He's here.
- Hm, what was that?
- He's here.
[Ava] Oh, it's about
fuckin' time. Let's go.
No. Go get yourself cleaned up.
- Why?
- He can't see you like this.
Oh.
Change of clothes in the front closet.
Oh.
Two of everything, always.
- Right.
- Yeah.
- Thanks.
- What are number twos for?
Okay. Yeah you're not so bad, Casey.
Mm-hm.
(footsteps clacking)
(Casey gasps) (ominous music)
Lennox?
[Ava] Stay put.
Sure thing, boss.
(suspenseful music)
(suspenseful music continues)
(suspenseful music continues)
Tyler?
Leave it off!
Sorry.
Being boxed up for Satan knows how long,
it's obviously scrambled some things.
No. No apology necessary.
What happened?
I remember being
out with Gino at Diesel's.
We're drinking.
Having fun.
It's like the usual shit. Uh...
Things are obviously a little
hazy, by the end of the night.
On this occasion, I
remember waking up in a box.
Unable to move.
This man.
This horrible man.
Nash Caruthers?
(ominous music)
We have him in the chamber.
It's ironic that we
can thank your captor,
now our captee, for finding you.
(Casey chuckles)
What'd he tell you?
An entirely different story.
How did you get out, man?
My best friend saved me.
He murdered mine.
Yeah. (Chuckles)
Gino thought Benny was Caruthers.
Solitary confinement
obviously fucked him up.
Obviously.
If it's any consolation,
he feels really bad about it.
Well, it explains why
he looked so off-kiltered.
I mean, but where is he?
- Around.
- Talk about a miracle.
Thanks be to Lenora Gimble.
- Who's Lenora Gimble?
- Pops here?
No. Any minute.
I need to see Caruthers.
No, no, no, no. Dad wants him alive.
Now.
I'm not so sure that
that's a great idea, Tyler.
- You're still in shock.
- Fuck you, Ava!
This is my birthright!
Even in my current capacity,
pops would still pick me.
And you know it.
Hey! Easy, man.
How about it, sis?
Yeah. (Sighs) Like you said.
Good girl.
(door handle rattles)
Lennox, open up! Come on, Lennox!
Where are my keys?
Lennox, open up!
This isn't the time to
be fuckin' around, man!
The boss just arrived!
Lennox, open up!
[Ava] Lennox? Stay put.
Sure thing, boss.
(ominous music)
You wanna have a little
fun?
Thought you'd never ask, buttercup.
(Lennox giggles)
(door clicks shut)
(suspenseful music continues)
How you doing there, buddy?
Does that hurt?
Ooh!
Ouch.
Don't pass out on me.
(fingers clicking)
(fist thuds) (Nash groans)
(Lennox laughs)
This is gonna be fun.
(Lennox breathes deeply)
Money aside,
the main reason I wanted
in on this particular job
was so that I could witness
an underground legend
like Dr. Titus fucking
Killian do his thang!
Yeah.
I wanted to be smack in the middle of
one of those twisted tales
I've heard so much about!
Yeah, see, uh, in my youth, I'd, uh,
I'd seek out the most gruesome,
depraved, disturbing fucking horror movies
I could get my grimey
little fuckin' paws on!
And I just, oh, I watched
the shit outta them.
Ah, back in the good old
glorious days of VHS. (Sighs)
Cannon fucking Films.
Yes!
Yeah, right.
You get it.
They were cool.
They were cool, but uh, my main jam
were the movies the Italians
were making in the 70s and 80s.
Yeah. Those fuckers know gore.
Like the fucking slashing
and the fucking stabbing!
And fuck this! (Groans)
Fuck! I love that shit.
Um...
Movies like, uh...
(sighs) "Burial Ground".
And, uh...
"Zombie".
That's a good one.
And, um...
"Anthropophagus"!
I mean, what does that even fucking mean?
It's like cannibals and
there's blood, and they...
(grunts) Fuckin' blood and like... (grunts)
Fuck, I love that shit. I love the blood!
I love the blood. (Pants)
Anyway, uh...
Long-ass story short... (pants)
I was thinking this might
be my opportunity to finally
see Mondo in the flesh.
Sadly, Dr. Killian is no longer with us.
And that leaves me
feeling a little deprived.
And that really bums me out, man.
Like...
But...
I think to myself.
Here I am,
in that torture porn capital of Chasden
with all of the doctor's
dastardly gear at my disposal.
And I think to myself...
I think...
(Lennox chuckles)
"Why don't I make my very own snuff movie?"
(ominous music continues)
You got issues, boy.
Yeah.
I do. I fucking do.
I do, but this whole operation's
going up in flames anyway,
so why not make the most of it?
Ah.
When your world is crashed, set it on fire.
Exactly.
Now, where do we start?
Hey. Can I have one last request?
Why not?
I'm really feelin' that
mean machete down there.
Where?
Down there. Take a look.
Look under the hood.
(machete scrapes) (Lennox giggles)
Fondness for Voorhees, huh?
Nah.
"Commando".
Commando.
(Lennox chuckles)
You know...
You're all right, Nash!
Call me Mr. Caruthers.
Kick out the jams, motherfucker!
Oh, ho-ho-ho-ho-ho!
(Nash grunts) (flesh squelches)
Holy shit!
Holy fuck! (Nash grunts)
(Nash grunts)
(Barbwire snaps)
Ooh!
(Lennox laughs)
Oh, yes!
Yeah!
Yeah!
Oh, fuckin' A!
(Nash laughs)
(fist thuds) (machete clatters)
(body thumps)
(Nash groans)
Fuck!
(Nash groans)
(Nash pants)
Ah, fuck!
Cock fuck!
(Nash grunts)
(Nash pants)
Fuck!
(flesh squelches)
(Nash groans)
(flesh squelches) (Nash groans)
God damn it.
Fuck!
Bitch!
(Nash pants)
Lennox, open up! (Knocks on door)
Come on, Lennox!
(knocks on door) Lennox!
Open the door!
Screw it. I say we leave
Out of the question.
Tyler, we have two of our
own people, okay? Probably more.
They knew the risks.
Fuck this place!
This place has served only
two functions for our family!
One, being to extract
information from helpless captives,
and the other being ruthless retribution
towards helpless captives, okay?
The point is that the deck is
always stacked in our favor,
with absolutely zero risk.
This is that 0.01% chance
where it swings the other way.
(tarp rustles)
It is what it is.
(chop thuds)
Oh, God!
Oh, my God, Lennox! What happened?
(flesh squelches) (blood splatters)
(explosion thumps) (ominous music)
(hurried footsteps clacking)
(body thumps)
[Ava] Daddy?
Hello, pumpkin.
My boy.
I thought I lost you.
What the fuck?
You look like shit, son.
We need to get some
food inside you, and fast.
Ava, order us some
Burgers, Burgers, Burgers.
Everyone good with
Burgers, Burgers, Burgers?
- I'm good, Pops.
- Nonsense.
Yeah, I said I'm good!
Suit yourself.
Daddy!
That wasn't a family, was it?
Good.
No harm, no foul.
Father! What the fuck is that?
Whoops. (Chuckles)
My bad. (Chuckles)
Flashback, shall we?
(upbeat surf rock music)
You were just gonna bail the scene, Titus.
I'm shocked..
Not to mention disappointed.
I was...
I'm aware this particular situation
is out of the ordinary.
But
the status quo,
my status quo,
can never,
will never be disrupted.
The walking dead.
Ah, the devil himself
is not above me!
I was afraid!
Oh, the kicker.
You fear someone,
something,
more than you do
Russell Ackerman?
That's what hurts the most.
Oh!
A little secret.
I've been taking Muay
Thai lessons for some time.
My kicks are a work in progress, but...
My elbows.
Good luck replacing me!
Like, you gonna get Ketomaki?
He's a fucking hack!
There is no room on
one mountain for two tigers!
(tiger growls)
(flesh squelches) Voila.
[Tyler] Where's Gino?
(aggressive heavy metal
music) (head thumps)
(head thumps) (blood squelches)
[Russell] You know me and loose ends.
(head thumps)
He was far gone, son.
(sighs) I put him out of his misery.
And done you a world of good.
(sighs) Plus, Gino was a lousy friend.
What're you waiting for, princess?
The least you can do is
bring these boys some drinks!
(sighs)
In my car, you'll find the
good stuff in the trunk.
Bring it in.
This is going to be a
very special occasion.
(dark music)
(dark music continues)
(dark music continues)
[Tyler] Thanks be to Lenora Gimble.
(dark music continues)
The town of Chasden
is known for its affable,
peaceful nature.
This is a place that's been
voted, on several occasions,
the most tranquil in the country.
This is a place that
people come to escape to,
to get away from this chaos of city life,
perhaps to start a family.
This is something this
reporter can attest to.
There's no more closer-knit community
than the one you'll find here in Chasden.
Crime?
We're talking zero murder rate.
That was, until that fateful
night on August 12th, 1986.
An incident so shocking
that its ripple effect would
change this beautiful town
and its good, decent inhabitants forever.
("Moonlight Sonata")
(locks click) (ominous music)
(ominous music continues)
("Moonlight Sonata" continues)
("Moonlight Sonata" continues)
Mr. Nash Caruthers.
We finally meet.
(Russell chuckles)
We've mistreated
a great deal of individuals in the
very spot
you now find yourself in.
Decades worth of pain,
suffering,
reside in the DNA of this room.
Can ya feel it?
Despite your worst intentions,
the Ackermans stand as strong as ever!
Don't you wanna know
what your little shit did
to deserve being on the
receiving end of my warpath?
Let me guess.
Uh...
He took advantage of your daughter?
Or, uh, perhaps...
Judging by, uh, this photo... (chuckles)
Your lovely wife.
He murdered them both!
Is this true?
O Tyler.
Did you indeed slay the women in his life?
Definitely.
Was it avoidable?
Definitely.
Oh-oh, do you have any other children?
Or, uh,
perhaps a mistress
to live for?
Yeah.
You know, as a fellow dad,
I would like to do the unprecedented thing
and spare your life.
Now, there's been no real harm done,
except, well, perhaps
on the psychological side,
which, which can be mended with therapy.
Regrettably, I...
I am opposed to loose ends.
Call it a compulsion. A...
It is... (chuckles)
What it is.
Oh, FYI. (Gasps)
On the drive over here, I
loathed you to the umpth degree.
I was fully prepared to rain
down unspeakable rage on your
body, mind and soul!
(Russel sighs)
But... (Nash groans)
But...
The man standing
before you at this juncture
is the very model of, uh, impassive.
Now, whether that means you
suffer more or, uh,
less than you would've in my, uh,
previous state, is another
question altogether.
(Nash groans)
Do tell me... (nail gun buzzes)
Which way
your experience goes
during these
your final moments...
You're boring me, fuck-face.
If all that hot air is supposed
to give me the willies,
that's a huge fail.
I got nothin' to lose.
So, your worst, at the very
best, might just piss me off!
(nail gun buzzes)
Stop!
This better be fucking important, Ava!
We need to leave, now.
Reason being? (Nash groans)
Lenora Gimble.
(Russell sighs)
Patience...
dissipating.
What about that cunt?
Were you aware that she
was murdered and buried
on this property, 30 years ago?
Yeah!
Did you have a hand in her death?
But of course!
Lenora was the Chamber
of Terror's very first patron.
Why?
Because I was asked,
by a few concerned citizens,
if I could talk some sense into Lenora.
They believed she was a bonafide witch
that would curse the town.
Needless to say, I chalked
Lenora up as the local loon
with knowledge of Chasden's seedier side,
prepared to expose the
town for what it really is.
You know how important Chasden's
goodie-two-shoes persona is to them!
(Russell sighs)
In a nutshell, I came to the
conclusion that the best manner
of dealing with meddlers
is to paint a vivid picture
that would ripple down
through generations to come!
Actually...
This painting is a snapshot
of that joyous occasion.
Those are my hands on that nail gun.
This trusty nail gun.
And why have you never
told us this story before?
Because it didn't
concern any of you. (Scoffs)
Lenora was my very first masterpiece!
She served no purpose, six feet under.
What are you talking about?
I went back and dug
her up, a few months ago,
and brought, well, what
remained of her, here...
right where she belongs!
[Lenora] Why?!
Why are you doing this, mister?!
I didn't do anything wrong! (Sobs)
Please! Please don't hurt me. (Sobs)
God. Lenora?
[Lenora's voice] Which you then replied:
[Russell's voice] The Lord giveth.
[Russell's voice] The Chamber taketh away.
(generator shuts down)
(Tyler screams)
(flesh squelches and tears)
(Tyler splutters and chokes)
(generator turns on)
[Russell] Oh, fuck!
What the fuck?
It's jammed! It's jammed!
- [Russell] Shut the fuck up!
- [Casey] Fuck off, man!
[Russell] Ava, what the
fuck do you think you're doing?
Fuck you, Russell! We need help!
We can trust you, right?
- For the time being.
- That'll do.
(Casey and Russell yell indistinctly)
My son! Why? (Casey screams)
(Russell screams) (intense music)
(flesh tears) (blood splatters)
(door slams)
That should hold
it for a bit. Let's split.
We can't leave.
(suspenseful music)
(Casey pants)
(Casey screams)
(supernatural scream)
(leather creaks)
You see? This is Lucifer's pad now.
Best we stay out of his affairs.
Don't you feel the least bit responsible?
My scheme to exact revenge
tanked somewhere along the way,
yet, somehow, retribution
was served nonetheless,
which goes to show your family's fate
was doomed to end
tonight, one way or another.
Uh, yeah. You didn't answer my question.
Look here, little miss.
I haven't decided what
I should do with you yet.
You saving my ass has complicated shit.
So, for your sake, don't uncomplicate it!
We can't leave.
Not after unwittingly unleashing a plague!
You heard your father.
This town was in on that poor girl's death!
The town of Chasden
deserves what's coming to it.
Including the innocent?
All right.
How do you propose we go
about killing what's already dead?
I don't know.
How'd you find out all
that stuff about Lenora?
YouTube.
Okay. For starters, we gotta
find out where she's buried.
Where do you guys traditionally
dispose of your victims?
I also don't know that. Um...
It's a long story, but this
is my first day on the job.
My father kept me away
from the unsavory cases,
such as yourself, until today, so...
No whiff of a stale fart? A rumor?
No. They definitely knew better.
I wish you would've guilted me
into saving this shithole town sooner.
If I knew we needed that
piece of shit father of yours
in one piece a little while longer,
I would've put in some
effort to save the prick.
Ah, forget it.
It's a lost cause. We tried.
No, no, no. Well, I, uh...
The maintenance room. Oh! Ah!
You know, if we, um, find her remains...
Okay, so, hear me out.
If we find her remains,
which has got to be hidden here somewhere
and give her, I don't
know, like a proper funeral,
then this nightmare will have to end.
Right? (Chuckles)
If we're gonna do this,
we gotta go balls-deep.
Oh.
No turning back.
Are you ready for that?
Um, (stutters) I don't
know about "balls-deep".
(leather creaks) Oh.
Balls.
Deep.
Okay.
Yeah, sure. Deep, deep, deep it is.
(suspenseful music continues)
(suspenseful music continues)
(car door clicks open)
(car door slams)
(car starts) (brooding synth rock music)
(brooding synth rock music continues)
(brooding synth rock music continues)
(trap clinks)
(car door clicks open)
(car door slams)
Okay.
So, this is, this is
your van. I got that part.
You are a human Swiss Army knife. Check.
There's just one thing I can't grasp.
After you dumped my brother and his crew
in the maintenance room,
you hid this van in the woods?
Yep.
You're not from around here.
Nope.
So, how the fuck did you get back home?
(gravel crunches under tires)
(phone rings)
(phone rings)
(phone rings)
Hello?
[Ava] Hi, um, is this the
priest of the household?
I am he. To whom am I speaking?
[Ava] Ava Ackerdoe. (Clears throat)
Ava Doe.
How may I be of assistance?
[Ava] Firstly, I do
apologize for the late call,
but unfortunately, it couldn't be helped.
Is there any way that we can
speak in person like right now?
(sighs) Ms. Doe, it is awfully late.
[Ava] Please, Father. This
is of the utmost importance.
I assure you.
What's this concerning?
[Ava] It's just, it's just if
I tell you over the phone,
you'll hang up.
I know I would.
You don't know that, my child.
Please. I'm all ears.
(garbled chatter from phone)
(Montoya chuckles)
(phone clacks)
(Montoya sighs)
(switch clicks)
(Montoya sniffs)
(ominous tones)
(whoosh)
(Montoya screams)
(head thumps)
(body thumps)
(upbeat surf rock music)
(upbeat surf rock music continues)
We are sorry for inconveniencing you.
Okay but this really, really
is a matter of life or death,
for the citizens of Chasden.
There is, like, this entity.
We need you to perform
a way-past-due funeral!
Yeah.
It's kind of like an exorcism,
just without all of the
vomiting and insults,
objects flying around.
Hopefully.
(chuckles) Easy peasy.
As soon as private mass is
done, we will take you back home,
along with an extremely
generous donation to the church.
Don't do anything fuckin' stupid!
Language, Caruthers!
(Ava chuckles)
(Ava sighs)
(tape tears) (Montoya groans)
You can both understand
how all this sounds on my end?
Yes. Okay, yes, totally.
And, and I apologize that we
have to dispense with the usual
you know, like, "What up,
who are you, who am I?"
(chuckles) Formalities.
Unfortunately, time is not on our side.
So, you're gonna have to just get by
with the whole faith angle, you know,
that the Church swears by.
Who is the soul we're laying to rest?
She's been dead as a
doornail for quite some time.
What's her name?
Lenora... You'll find out in due time!
For me to perform a
funeral, there are certain things
I would need, in order for it to be valid.
You can't just fake through it,
or it won't have the
effect you're looking for.
Yes. Okay, so way ahead of you.
I took the liberty of packing
your wardrobe, rosary,
cross, and the Good Book.
There's one more thing. Without it-
- Covered!
- Not alcohol.
Though, to be frank, I wouldn't mind some.
This is the hardest liquor
on God's semi-green earth, God damn it.
And that would be?
(crickets chirp) (somber organ music)
(flask rattles) (alcohol trickles)
(water sizzles)
(water trickles)
(whoosh)
Okay, so, are we missing anything else?
(Montoya sighs)
(engine hums) (surf rock music)
(brakes squeak)
(surf rock continues)
Well, it hasn't tripped
yet, so that's a good sign.
It's what's inside that counts.
(Door locked) - Okay, so
considering that poor girl
was this place's first
victim, my gut tells me
that my father would
keep her remains here for
sentimental reasons.
And where would that be?
I've got a hunch.
You got a lot of hunches.
That's true.
I'm gonna give the vicar here a tour.
An unmotivated priest isn't
gonna do us a lick of good.
Parson?
Don't do anything stupid.
I might've been raised
Catholic, but that doesn't mean
I'm gonna hesitate putting a
giant manhole in your chest!
Okay, so, what he means to say
is that you are the only clergyman in town.
So, if we fail, well, you'd be failing God.
(eerie music)
(eerie music continues)
(eerie music continues)
(eerie music continues)
[Nash] I got you covered.
(eerie music continues)
Miss, um, Doe.
Actually, her name's Ava.
And you call me Mr. Caruthers.
All right, Mr. Caruthers.
If I heard correctly, did
Ava mention a Lenora?
She wouldn't be referring to Lenora Gimble?
Bingo.
(Montoya chuckles)
But she's been missing for-
More like dead for 25 years.
How do you know this?
I'll tell you the whole
story, if we get outta this.
(suspenseful music)
(suspenseful music continues)
(tarp rustles)
Fuck!
[Nash] Anti-Heaven, in the flesh.
(ominous ghostly voice)
Crap. She's out.
(ominous ghostly voice)
(Lenora wheezes)
(suspenseful music continues)
(suspenseful music continues)
(suspenseful music continues)
(Lenora wheezes)
[Lenora] Father
Montoya.
Do I know you?
Lenora, you've got your revenge.
Lenora Gimble?
[Lenora] I've only
just begun.
Who's left?
[Lenora] The town of Chasden.
The spawns of the people that wronged you
had nothing to do with your murder!
[Lenora] Guilty by association. (Wheezes)
You of all should know.
(gun fires) (ominous music)
What have you done?
Tranquilized the ghost chick.
"Tranquilized"?
You just murdered a troubled woman
in need of professional help!
You can't kill what's already dead.
(ominous music continues)
(Nash groans)
(Lenora screams) (flesh squelches)
(Montoya gasps)
(footsteps clacking)
(leather creaks)
The fuck away from me.
(Nash grunts)
(hurried footsteps clacking)
Found it! (Montoya gasps)
Oh, sorry.
(Ava chuckles)
What, what, what's up?
You guys look like you just seen a ghost.
(Ava gasps)
Really?
You're tellin' me you
didn't hear all that racket?
Come to think of it, it
was unusually stilly in there.
Ah, fuck this shit.
Oh, pardon his French.
Again.
(Montoya sighs)
(Montoya gasps)
(Montoya retches)
I see you've met my family.
(flesh squelches)
(ominous music)
(tarp rustles)
(bones clatter)
(Montoya coughs)
How do you know that's her?
Because that there is the
Succubus Death Ecstasy logo.
Cut and dried, eh?
The shoe fits.
Yeah, I'll take your word for it.
Are you sure that I'll be of use to you?
(ominous electric guitar drones)
(suspenseful music)
(Nash mumbles)
All right.
Let's see what we can do with this.
Ah, this is gonna be one hell of a party.
Oh.
Where's the ugly beige suit?
Oh, I mean, it didn't
work. Yeah, lots of blood.
What're you up to?
This witch is likely to put
up a fight. I need some fuel!
Fuel?
You nearly killed me,
and when I say nearly,
I mean not even fuckin' close.
I was kinda like a little bit close.
Where did you get this?
You people are drug dealers, aren't you?
Yes. It's one of the
operations my father runs.
Ran. Past tense.
Oh, that's so right.
You're planning on seducing
the dead with cocaine?
No!
Uh...
No, thank you.
Suit yourself.
Okay, how do I do this?
How the fuck do you do this shit?
Do you snort, increments, what?
I don't know! It's not
my area of expertise!
What kind of mobster are you?
Like the very recently retired kind!
Wait a minute. You've
never done this before?
Of course not!
Then why the fuck are
you starting right now?
Because this Congo line
is gonna Popeye me up!
That's what it's gonna do!
- Who the fuck is Popeye?!
[Nash] Fuckin' Millennials!
[Ava] Seriously, who's he
And what the fuck does
he have to do with this?
He's a cartoon sailor who-
Focus!
(Montoya chuckles)
Popeye himself isn't
really that important.
But once he gets his hands on
some spinach and gulps it down
he gets these like superpowers
and he can kick anyone's
fucking butt for a limited amount of time!
(leather creaks)
Okay.
Not only is that concept asinine,
but that you correlate eating
spinach to snorting cocaine!
Got any better ideas?
No.
Mass!
Now!
(suspenseful music continues)
Our father in heaven,
we thank you that through Jesus Christ,
you have given us the gift of eternal life.
All right, if the drugs don't kill me,
whatever the hell we're dealing with, will.
Either way, you win. Unless
you bite the bullet, too.
You've got a death wish, Caruthers.
Where would be the fun in that?
(Nash sighs)
Let's party!
(ominous rock music)
Fuck yeah!
(body thumps)
Um...
Uh...
(Montoya speaks Latin)
- Nash, Nash.
Shit.
Nash.
(Montoya speaks Latin)
- Shit.
(Montoya speaks Latin)
Amen.
When the time has come,
let us depart in peace
and see you face to face.
For you are the Lord of our salvation.
Congregation. Amen.
Congregation!
Yeah! Uh, Amen!
Is that it?
Father?
(suspenseful music)
(Lenora screams)
Rest in peace, Lenora.
(eerie tones)
Shit.
Caruthers. (Foot thuds)
Caruthers! (Foot thuds)
Ava! (Ava gasps)
Who's out there?
[Tyler] It's me. Tyler.
[Russell] And Daddy.
(gun cocks)
(Ava sighs)
Fuck that.
[Russell] Our memory's a little hazy.
All I know is we've
been given another shot,
and I'm not gonna squander it.
I apologize.
Honey, I bought you ice cream
when you were a little kid!
I bought you... (gun fires)
How could you?
Obviously, you never met Russell.
Because if you did, you know
that there's not a traumatic
situation in hell that
could unblacken his heart.
(Ava pants)
Father?
Are you sure that you
completed the ceremony?
(Lenora wheezes) (flesh squelches)
(body thumps) (ominous music)
(flesh squelches) (blood splatters)
(Lenora wheezes)
(Ava gasps)
(flesh squelches)
(body thumps) (Ava grunts)
(ominous music continues)
(ominous music continues)
[Lenora] It's
futile,
Ava!
The Ackerman
bloodline
ends
here.
Oh. (Gasps)
(bones crack) (ominous music continues)
(ominous music continues)
Lenora.
What my father did to you was unforgivable.
I understand why you want my family dead.
Why you want me dead. (Lenora wheezes)
Okay, I turned a blind
eye on this place for years.
Naively, I just thought that
everybody here had it coming.
But I now know that I was wrong.
You showed me that.
Okay? So, so please.
You can kill me.
Okay? But please just
let that be the end of it.
(Lenora wheezes)
(Lenora wheezes) (ominous music continues)
The acceptance
of your
fate
is
Appreciated.
It
Does not
absolve
the town
of
Chasden.
It
Must
and
will
be
Eradicated.
Right behind ya, pizza face.
(Nash grunts) (flesh squelches)
(flesh squelches) (bloody splatters)
(fist thuds) (Nash grunts)
(fist thuds)
(door clicks open)
(Nash grunts)
(head thumps)
(Nash grunts)
(footsteps clacking)
(flesh squelches)
(moody synth music)
Crap.
Does this mean I'm gonna be
on a strict blood sucker diet?
If so, stake me, pronto.
No.
Well...
No, no, no, no.
I've, I've never heard of a ghost vamp,
and her being the host, now being dead,
I think that puts you in the clear.
Beautiful.
(tooth squelches)
Don't beat yourself up, kiddo.
She was consumed by hate.
Yeah.
This was the inevitable
conclusion to her story.
[Ava] Mr. Caruthers?
Call me N.C.
Oh.
Okay. (Chuckles)
N.C.
Have you finally made a decision
concerning the remaining Ackerman?
I'll let you live to tell the tale.
- Need a ride home?
- Oh. (Chuckles)
No, thanks. I think I ought a
stay and clean up the mess.
Yeah, about that. I got a
90-second solution for ya.
Okay.
(gasps) Oh.
What's this?
If I were you, I'd have my car started,
out front, door wide open.
Then burn rubber, baby, and I mean it.
Who are you?
(Nash scoffs)
(van starts)
[Narrator] Like I said at the start,
this tale is 99% factual.
We don't actually know
if the C4 was the catalyst
for the destruction of
this cesspool of evil.
And what about Ava
Ackerman and Nash Caruthers,
the unlikely duo of heroes
who had to trek to hell and back
to discover their place
in this topsy-turvy world we live in?
Ava's whereabouts are unknown at this time,
but I'd like to think that
she's doing just fine.
And as for Mr. (clears throat) Caruthers,
he is about to enter
the once tranquil site,
unceremoniously known
as Camp Gore.
Here, he will face, again,
unbeknownst to himself,
the greatest adversity imaginable.
(machete scrapes)
But that, my friends,
is another tale entirely.
(eerie whispering tones)
(moody synth rock music)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)
(moody synth rock music continues)