Bigger Fatter Liar (2017) Movie Script

Kevin? Kevin!
I'm up! I'm up.
You're gonna be late for school.
I'm already dressed, Dad.
I'm practically out of the door.
Why don't I believe you?
Are you calling me a liar?
Well, let's just say that you and the
truth aren't always on speaking terms.
Well, that hurts.
To think that my father doesn't
even believe his first-born child.
It's not a question
of belief, Kevin,
it's a question of experience,
and in my experience...
Who are you going to believe?
Your experience?
Or your son?
Well, I stand corrected.
Honestly, Dad...
I wish you'd learn
to trust me once in a while.
Okay, I apologize.
And Dad, I need some cash
for the class trip.
I thought I gave you money
for a class trip last week.
It's for another class trip.
They must be running a travel
agency out of your school.
Finish your homework?
Of course I finished
my homework.
It's right in here.
I'll see you tonight, then.
See you tonight, Dad.
Okay. All right.
I will be collecting your social
studies assignment this morning.
You're late, Kevin.
Sorry. Sorry.
It's not my fault.
I was helping Principal Taggert
with a school safety issue.
And what safety issue
would that be?
I'm afraid I can't tell you, Miss Walker.
Top-level security.
Sworn to secrecy.
Take a seat, Kevin.
As you know, this assignment is
worth 30% of your final grade,
so I hope you all took it
very seriously.
Top-level security?
It's the best I could come
up with on short notice.
One of these days, you're
gonna get caught, you know.
Well, not today.
Thank you.
Kevin. Award'?
Is there a problem, Miss Walker?
I'm not sure.
You wrote this paper
all by yourself?
Stayed up all night,
but it was worth it.
I really think I learned
something important.
You know what?
I think I better
call your father
to confirm that you actually did
write this paper on your own.
Oh, I wouldn't do
that, Miss Walker.
My dad's very busy, you know.
You really shouldn't bother him.
Mmm. It won't
take a minute.
And I'm sure your father's interested
in your education, of course.
Of course.
Happy Friday, kids.
We are pleased to inform you that we
won't be serving plain, hot mush today.
It will be hot mush with
applesauce and cinnamon.
Bon apptit.
Thanks. Keep the change.
What if Miss Walker
wasn't kidding?
What if she really does
call your dad?
Becca, I'm hurt.
You, of all people, don't
believe I wrote that paper?
How long have we been friends?
Since third grade.
And what's our agreement?
We never lie to each other.
I know you didn't
write that paper.
Then you also know
I've got a plan.
You know we're stalling,
but they don't know that.
Don't worry about it.
It's just a little white lie.
Well, just tell
them we need some more time
to review the documents.
Hang on a sec. Another call.
Never mind.
It's a wrong number.
Wonder who this is.
Hello? This is Tom Shepard.
Hello, Mr. Shepard.
This is Karen Walker, Kevin's
social studies teacher.
Ah, yes.
Hello, Karen. Kevin has
told me a lot about you.
He has?
He says you're one of the
best teachers at the school.
Oh! Well,
I don't know about...
I am calling
to confirm something.
Did Kevin stay up all night working
on his social studies assignment?
No. No, he did not.
He retired around 3:00 a.m.
He's been working quite hard
on this paper for weeks.
I'd be very surprised if it
didn't earn him at least an A.
Well, I will certainly, um...
By the way, are you calling
all the parents today?
Uh. No, but...
ls there some reason you're
suspicious of my son in particular?
Well, no, it's just...
For crying out loud,
cut the kid some slack.
Now, if you'll excuse me, Miss Walker,
I've got work to do. Bye-bye.
Why did I ever doubt you?
The doctor said
it's a very rare condition...
And any kind of extreme physical
exertion could result in...
Excuse me!
Sorry to interrupt.
Kevin, I need to see you
in my classroom.
No. Um, actually, I'm in a meeting.
Can it wait?
It can't.
They have this wonderful
new program called iCompare
that correlates instances of selected texts
against known sources on the Internet.
It could've been a coincidence.
Forty-seven times?
I'm afraid the odds are
not in your favor, Kevin.
Okay, I'm sorry.
I just ran out of time.
I didn't know what else to do.
Usually, I would have to
report this to the principal,
but I think, in this case,
one-week suspension.
I can do better than that.
One month.
No Internet, no allowance, no
phone, no video games and no car.
And, of course, I will need you to redo
your assignment in your own words,
and in your own
handwriting this time.
No Internet?
Tomorrow's the last day
of the semester.
I want your new assignment on my desk
no later than 9:00 tomorrow morning.
Summer school?
Unless I come up with
a completely new project,
I'm gonna be spending the entire
summer stuck in some classroom
with Miss Walker and a
bunch of mouth-breathers.
Okay, well, let's think. Uh...
Just pick a topic.
New technologies.
Trends in new technologies.
How am I supposed to write
about new technologies
if I can't even use
my current technology?
They say you should write
about what you know.
Great. So what do I know?
Well, you know how to lie.
Just trying to help.
This isn't a game, Becca.
This is serious business.
A game.
I gotta go!
See you tomorrow.
I'm done!
Great. Just great.
Yeah, I'm coming home.
Nah, it was
a total waste of time.
No-talent hacks at that stupid game
expo couldn't come up with Ms. Pac-Man
if you gave' em
three ghosts on a plate.
Yeah, I'm on my way
to the airport now.
If the guy could
find the gas pedal!
I'll call you later.
So you're in the, uh,
video game business?
Oh, let me guess.
You got a great idea for a game?
Yeah, actually, I do.
It's called...
Nice guy-
Kevin Shepard, you're a genius.
Oh, no. Oh! Wow.
Oh, my gosh.
Oh, my gosh, kid.
I didn't even see you.
You okay?
I think you broke my tibia.
Your tibia's in your leg.
Phantom pains!
Phantom pains!
All right, kid.
Looks like you lived.
We gotta get to the airport!
Well, what about my bike?
Tough break.
Hope you have insurance.
How am I supposed
to get to school?
Isn't there a bus
for you people?
I need to get to school now!
Look, give me a ride and I'll forget all
about this clearly illegal hit-and-run.
Uh, we didn't run.
We stopped.
Forget it, kid!
Thanks to Miss Daisy here, I'm
already late for my flight.
Ow! My arm!
My leg!
We'd better get a police report.
Someone call 911.
All right!
He's kidding.
Shut up. Get in the car.
Come on!
Come on! Come on!
Hi. I'm Kevin Shepard.
Where's your school?
Fourth and Maple.
Give it some gas!
We haven't got all day.
Yes, Mr. Wolf.
So, what brings you to Columbus?
I came here for
the video game expo.
I was scouting for new talent
for Highcroft Electronics,
apparently wasting my time.
Did you say
Highcroft Electronics?
Have you heard of it?
Are you kidding?
Red Thunder? Army Call?
Space Zombie 2?
That place is legendary.
You work there?
Oh, Larry Wolf.
Head of Interactive.
You must be a genius.
I'll accept that.
You know, I wrote a game.
For my social studies
assignment. You want to see?
Oh. Sure, sure, I do,
but first, let me grab my ceremonial
knife and commit hari-Highcroft!
But it's really good.
Yeah, yeah, read my lips.
I'm not interested in
your stupid game here.
Here we are.
I guess we're here.
Yes, we are.
Hey, can I have my game back?
Sure, sure, of course. Here, let
me get the door for you here.
Hey, thanks for the ride.
We're even, right?
Yeah, sure.
Good. Out.
Hey, drive! Hey,
what are you doing?
But what about
the kid's assignment?
I said drive,
you idiot! Drive!
Hey. Come back!
You've got my assignment!
Come back!
You seriously expect me
to believe this?
But it's true! I did the
assignment, I swear.
Uh-huh. So, some guy hits you with his
limousine, then stole your homework?
Look, I know how it sounds...
Actually, Kevin,
I don't think you do.
But I'm telling you the truth.
Maybe I lied a few times
in the past... A few?
Okay, a lot!
But this time,
you have to believe me.
Enjoy summer school, Kevin.
The fundamentals of economics have
remained unchanged for centuries,
with the simple idea
that supply and demand
is the foundation of all commerce in
all fashions all around the world,
wherein, if supply equals "X"
and demand equals
But if we are to understand
that "Y" is greater than "X",
we can invert
the equation and reverse...
Yes to economic theory?
Thank you. I agree.
One with the floor.
Respect your center.
Do we have a problem, Mr.
Shepard? Yeah!
That jerk stole my game!
You really expect me
to believe this?
But it's true, Dad.
You can look him up.
His name is Larry Wolf, he's
from Highcroft Electronics,
and he took my social
studies assignment.
Are we back to that lie again?
I'm not lying! Oh, wait a second.
Let me see.
Are your lips moving? Yes.
That means you're lying.
That hurts, Dad.
How do you think I feel, Kev?
I can't even trust my own son.
Now, I'll be back from
New York in three days.
This should tide
you over till then.
And this is for
emergencies only.
You got that?
Got it.
Say it with me. For...
Emergencies only.
Emergencies only.
Your mom was always so proud
of you, Kevin.
I can't help but thinking how
disappointed she'd be with all of this.
I know I am.
But, Dad...
No more lies.
Highcroft Electronics.
How can I direct your call?
Yes, I'd like to speak to Mr. Larry
Wolf in your Interactive division.
Can I ask who's calling, please?
My name is Kevin Shepard.
And, Mr. Shepard,
what is this regarding?
It's regarding my game, Big Fat
Liar, which he stole from me and...
Please don't call back.
Kevin, you've called four times already.
Give it up.
No, not until I talk to Wolf.
Do you know how many crank phone
calls they must get there every day?
From people just like you,
who say they had their idea
for a game stolen?
You might as well forget it.
I won't call anymore.
I'm gonna go see him in person.
Think about it!
He can't hang up on me when
I'm standing in his office.
San Francisco is, like,
2,000 miles away.
My dad said for
emergencies only.
This is an emergency.
So wait, you're just
going to walk in there,
all by yourself and
try to meet this guy?
You're right.
I can't do this alone.
Me? No! I can't go
to San Francisco.
Give me one good reason why not.
I'll give you two.
My parents.
They'll never say yes to this.
So lie.
Mom? Dad?
There's something
I have to tell you.
I've decided I want
to go to Yoga Camp.
How's the new phone?
Perfect. Thanks, Dad.
Highcroft Electronics, please.
There he is.
Yo. Hansel and Gretel.
Where do you think you're going?
We're here to see Larry Wolf.
Got an appointment?
Not exactly, but he's going
to want to talk to me.
Oh, yeah.
I'm sure he's been dreaming
of this his whole life.
Look, Jimmy, we've come a very
long way for this meeting.
I would suggest you just call upstairs and
let him know that Kevin Shepard is here.
Hi, Mr. Wolf?
It's Jimmy in the lobby.
I was hoping to get fired
today for bothering you
about a couple of snotty kids
who don't have an appointment.
On second thought,
I'll keep my job.
Now what?
Be right back.
Go on up.
Mmm, go on up.
Yeah, go on up.
Bigger Fatter Liar.
Oh... It's not supposed
to do that, sir.
It's not supposed to freeze
in the middle of the game?
I had no idea...
You're such an idiot!
It's still got a few bugs, but
I'm sure once we get it up and running,
you won't be able
to put it down, Mr. Wolf.
No, no, I doubt that.
I do not play video games.
Video games are for losers
with nothing better to do.
Excuse me, Mr. Wolf?
If you don't like the games, why are
you running the Interactive division?
Well, let me ask
you something, Connie.
It's Kenny, sir.
Yeah, whatever.
Do you think that
I like microwave ovens?
No, I don't.
Microwave ovens cook like crap,
and they don't even get
the popcorn setting correct.
But I spent five years
in appliances.
Five long years.
I pioneered convection-roasting
I introduced the
FridgeMate TV system.
I tripled the revenue
for that department.
I was a shoo-in to be
president of this company.
Top-floor office.
Big pay raise.
A view.
You have a wonderful view, sir.
Oh, yeah? Really?
Look at this.
I've worked for this
company for 30 years.
I deserved to be president.
They owed it to me. But what
did Old Man Highcroft do?
He gave the job to his grandson.
His idiot grandson!
I meant to say that.
Now, you listen to me.
I'm going to work you morons
like rented monkeys
until I turn this turd of a
department into a winner.
Then I'm going to show them who
should be president of this company!
Wait here.
I'm sorry. Mr. Wolf is
in a meeting right now.
He's going to have
to call you back.
Delivery for Mr. Wolf.
Thank you. You can just
put that right there.
Sorry. This is
a special order.
Mr. Wolf asked for this
to be hand-delivered to him.
Well, I'm Mr. Wolf's
executive assistant.
I'm sure I can handle this.
My instructions were
very specific, Penny.
Oh, Penny.
Just give it to me!
Look, kid, it's just a pizza!
Mr. Wolf's office.
Hi, Penny, it's Mike.
I had a really good time
last night at, uh...
Olive Garden?
Oh! So did I, Mike. I didn't
expect to hear from you so soon.
L need to see you again.
Can you meet me right away?
Right now?
I know it sounds crazy,
but I have to see you.
I need to tell you how I feel.
Oh, Mike.
I think this could be the start
of something very special.
I'm in the lobby.
I'll be right down.
You're still here. Fine, yeah.
You can go. Fine.
Good luck.
Wait. What? Uh...
Don't worry, Mr. Wolf.
We'll do our best to see that
Big Fat Liar launches on time.
You'd better, because if
it doesn't, Candy... Kenny.
Yeah, whatever.
The point is, is that if
you don't fix this game,
I'm gonna see to it that you spend
the rest of your pathetic life
programming talking baby
dolls till your ears bleed!
Hi. Remember me?
She's on a date.
All right, everybody, get out.
So, let me guess. This is
about, um, Big Fat Liar, right?
So you do remember?
What do you want, kid?
What do you think he wants?
Uh, money, credit
and an apology.
Actually, no.
All I want is for you to call
my dad and tell him the truth.
Seriously? We came all
this way for that?
You want me to call your dad,
Daddy, and tell him that I,
um, stole your idea?
Let me think about that.
Yeah, I'm gonna say no.
Mr. Wolf.
Mr. Wolf.
Come on! Think about it.
I think we both know you want
to do the right thing.
Pretty much goes without saying that
if I'm going to steal somebody's idea,
which you have
absolutely no proof of,
I'm probably not going
to do the right thing.
Mr. Wolf?
You're making a big mistake.
Is that a threat?
Let me tell you something, kid.
I didn't get this far in the corporate
snake pit by being intimidated,
especially by some
smart-ass kid.
So why don't you and
Fly-Over Barbie here
go back to Hooterville,
where you belong?
I came up with Big Fat Liar, and I
am never going to admit otherwise.
Oh, Mr. Wolf,
I am so sorry.
Oh! So am I, because the unemployment
line is so long these days!
Steroids, get these two
out of my sight.
Yes, sir.
Nice try with the phone.
Beat it.
Zip it.
Well, it was worth a shot.
If it's any consolation,
I believed you all along.
Oh, this isn't over.
Well, what else can you do?
You heard Wolf.
You don't have any proof, and
he's not going to admit anything.
Not yet.
You bumped his phone?
Got all the data when
it was in my pocket.
Addresses, phone numbers,
schedules, emails...
ls that...
What kind of moron keeps his
credit card numbers in his phone?
He could have done this
the easy way.
But now, we're gonna
do things my way.
Of course, Mr. Wolf.
Your father has arranged a pre-paid
room, all expenses on his account.
Welcome to
the Fairmont Nob Hill.
This is beautiful.
Tell me they have a minibar.
$50 for a cheeseburger?
Yeah, that's crazy.
We need to spend more money.
Let's go out for dinner.
Um, Kevin, I didn't
exactly pack for going out.
Don't worry, we'll just put
it on Larry Wolf's tab.
You know what?
We'll take them all.
How much is this going to cost?
Uh... Who cares?
Don't you think it's a bit ironic,
trying to prove to your dad
that you're telling the truth by
lying, cheating, and stealing?
Wolf ripped me off.
I'm just paying him back.
Oh, look. Caviar!
Really expensive caviar.
I still feel bad about this.
I told you, Wolf deserves it.
Not that, this.
I really don't mind sleeping on
the couch if you want the bed.
You came all this way with me.
It's the least I could do.
True. Are you going to
the homecoming dance?
No. You?
Give me a break. It's
a stupid, outdated ceremony.
Designed to maintain
the status quo.
And feed the egos of
cool kids in school.
Well, you can't dance, anyway.
Well, you dance like a duck.
You move like you've
got explosive diarrhea.
I do not!
Dance, Kevin, dance!
You're going down!
Hi, Dad.
Hey, Kev.
I'm just checking in.
Is everything okay?
Just great. I'm learning
a lot at summer school.
I really think this is going
to be a life-changing event.
Well, I'm glad to hear that.
I'll be home in a couple days,
but if you need anything,
just let me, you know...
Gotta go, Dad! Don't want to be
late for civil disobedience class.
Hurry up.
Got it.
I think it's time we saw San Francisco.
Don't you?
Good morning, Mr. Wolf,
Miss... Wolf.
May I arrange a car for you?
Thank you, Elliot.
You may.
Figaro, Figaro, Figaro, Figaro
Figaro, Figaro,
Figaro, Figaro, Figaro
Hello, San Francisco!
You've got a call.
The bank.
Larry Wolf.
Yes, this is he.
Unusual charges?
No, those are all accounted for.
Just treating my little
lady to a day in the city,
if that's okay with you.
Yes, we might be making
a few more big purchases.
Very big-
Yes, you too.
Buh-bye now.
Are we in trouble?
Please. It's all
under control.
So, you really
Mr. Wolf's kids?
Hmm. Interesting.
Mr. Wolf has no kids.
Oh. Well, he doesn't
like to talk about us.
We're the black sheep
in the family.
Cut the crap. I work
for Highcroft Electronics.
The hotel, they called the
company to arrange the limo.
Yeah. Uh-oh.
I overheard you talking about
using his credit card.
What are you up to?
Nothing. It's all authorized.
Give me a break.
Let me tell you a little story.
Before I drive limo,
I used to work for Mr. Wolf.
You designed video games?
No, housewares.
I was the top engineer in
the whole appliance division.
Ever heard of the FridgeMate?
The TV set built
into the refrigerator?
That was me.
I've always wondered why
people wanted to watch TV
standing in front of the fridge.
I don't know.
They just do.
My point is,
it was my invention,
and then my boss,
the Mr. Larry Wolf,
he stole my idea
and pretended it was his own!
I know the feeling.
Why didn't you say something?
But what would I say?
Hmm? I had no proof, and it
was his word against mine.
And when I confronted him on it,
he reassigned me to
the transportation department,
and he said
if I ever complained,
he would blacklist
my name all over town!
Why are you telling us all this?
Because, I can tell that you
two are up to something,
and if it involves causing
any Hooterville to Mr. Wolf,
I'm in.
According to his schedule,
he's in meetings all day.
So, he won't be home.
The perfect time to drop by
his house for a little visit.
And then we kill him, hmm?
Uh, no.
Uh, no.
Suit yourself.
Tomorrow, you have your meeting with Mr.
Highcroft at 2:00...
Oh, that little twerp. Why do I
have to waste my time on him?
Because he is the company's president.
And then you're being interviewed
by the TV station at 3:00.
Those bozos better
have Big Fat Liar ready,
'cause if Highcroft finds
out, we're in trouble.
He'll pull the plug
on this whole thing.
I'm sure they're working as hard
as they can. Well, I'm not.
I want Dopey and his Short
Bus Team here all night.
I want that game checked
and double-checked
till it's good to go,
you got that?
All night, sir?
Oh, I want you to stick
around and supervise. Me?
What? Did I st-st-st-stutter?
This has gotta be your top priority.
Got it?
Yes, sir, Mr. Wolf.
Have a nice night.
You, too.
"Top priority."
How do we get in?
I've got this.
Those don't look like
refrigerator repair tools.
Mmm. Sometimes, the
refrigerator is in a place
that's hard to get to, you know.
Let me try.
Key code, 555-55-55.
What do we do?
Alarm code, 555-55-55.
At least he's consistent.
Wow. Nice place.
Yes. We should
torch it, no?
Let's just look around
a bit first, okay, Ivan?
Okay, whatever.
Anything interesting?
He's downloaded every
episode of My Little Pony.
Even the Christmas special?
What? It's a really good show.
I'll just take everything
and sort it out later.
Look at these.
These are for...
Yeah, they are.
We got him.
Oh, he's got mu-sh...
I've hidden the car.
Did you get the stuff?
You must never question Ivan.
Skin bleach.
And skin dye.
He's here.
Game on.
The alarm! We forgot to
turn the alarm back on.
Every day I'm getting
faster, stronger.
Every day I'm getting
faster, stronger.
Every day I'm getting
faster, stronger.
Every day I'm getting faster...
Do you think it's gonna work? Every
day I'm getting faster, stronger.
Every day I'm getting
faster, stronger.
Every day I'm...
Maybe we didn't use enough.
I think we used enough.
Let's get to work.
Oh! What did I do last night?
My head's killing me.
That kid!
It's that kid!
Mr. Wolf's office.
Hi, Penny. It's Melissa
from Mr. Highcroft's office.
It's about his meeting
today with Mr. Wolf.
Mr. Highcroft's office called. He
changed your appointment to noon.
He'd like to meet you
for lunch instead.
No, no, no. No! No!
I'm trying to find your day-planner
to see if that'll work...
Did you want me to tell him
you're unavailable?
No. He'll think
something's wrong.
Okay. I'm texting you
the address right now.
Are you sure you're up
for this meeting?
What is that supposed to mean?
You just sound a little odd.
You just... You just mind
your own business!
I'm fine.
Everything's fine!
Kevin Shepard,
I'm going to kill you!
Shut the hell up, you moron!
Sorry! It's not me!
It's the car.
Oh, really? Really?
Are you kidding me? This
is a $200,000 automobile!
Good for you, buddy!
Good for you!
I got your license plate,
So sue me!
Oh! Yeah!
Problem, sir? Whoa!
Officer, did you see that?
Please put your hands
where I can see them, sir.
No, no. That hillbilly! He
deliberately backed into my car!
Uh-huh. Can I see your license
and registration, please?
Oh, no, I got a meeting
I got to get...
Hey! No sudden
movements, sir.
Ah, it's in
the glove compartment.
Cirque do Soleil in town?
What? No, no. It's just... This is a prank.
It's a long story.
What's this?
What... What is this?
These are the blueprints for
the bank over on 17th Street.
No, this.
What is this?
What? No! It's rubber!
You see? It's a fake gun!
Come on! I mean, it's my first
day on the job. Just freeze.
What are you gonna do'? You gonna...
No, no, no, no...
Yeah. There might
be more of them there, so...
Better put out an APB for any
mimes carrying concealed weapons.
Got him.
Good. Now can we go home?
Why? I thought
we were having fun.
We are.
It's just, I feel bad
about lying to my parents.
Come on. A little lie here and
there doesn't hurt anybody.
Besides, it makes
life interesting.
It makes me interesting.
You don't need a lie to do that.
I guess, after my mom died,
it just seemed easier to make up stuff
than it was to have to face the truth.
I just sort of got used to it.
Well, I don't want
to get used to it.
Like you've never
lied to your parents before?
You remember that time we snuck out and
went to the Midnight Madness movies?
I got caught.
You never told me that.
I didn't want to make you feel
bad, but I got in big trouble.
I told them I snuck out alone.
You lied for me? Why?
Because, dummy, uh...
You're my best friend.
And that's the truth.
- What took you so long?
- I'm sorry.
But I had to explain to accounting
why I needed bail money!
Mr. Wolf, I don't understand why you had
bank blueprints, and a mask, and a gun!
It wasn't a real gun!
Mr. Wolf!
Well, you have been acting
very suspicious lately.
It's not me, it's...
Oh, never mind.
Yes, sir.
Does it have anything to
do with your face, sir?
Oh, shut up, Penny!
That's not how you found my car!
Oh, no. Oh, no.
That's how I found your car.
You'll be hearing
from my lawyer.
Go back to France, creep!
I'm not from France!
Would you open it?
Well, you're welcome!
You're kidding.
Go, Niners!
I'm looking for a man
named Highcroft.
I think you're in the
wrong place, freakshow.
Whoa! Whoa, whoa.
Are you threatening me
because I'm wearing makeup?
Because I look like a mime?
Because I'm just
a little bit different?
I thought this was America.
I thought...
I thought
we were supposed to accept people,
no matter what they look like.
Phew! Or smell like.
I mean, after all,
I don't get on your case
when you get a little drunk and
try to get romantic with a squid.
No, I do not.
I mean, in my book.
What you people do on the high
seas stays on the high seas!
Am I right?
Who's with me?
So, you give up yet?
It was you?
What'd you do to my face?
I can't... I can't get it off!
My face!
I... I'm gonna...
I'm gonna kill you!
Careful, Wolfie.
They don't care much for
mimes around these parts.
Oh! Doesn't matter.
I mean, fine.
I mean, you got me with your
little sophomoric prank, right?
But, big picture?
I'm the winner.
You're the loser!
We'll see.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
We'll see. We'll see.
Yeah! We'll see!
Where's my car?
Is he here yet?
Well, actually...
Good, good, good.
'Cause I don't want that little toad
running off to his grandpa, telling him...
No, no, no... I kept his
precious brat waiting.
Miss Wise, I don't have time
to sit around and waste...
Mr. Highcroft! What a
pleasure it is to see you!
Oh, would you please accept
my humblest apologies
for my being a little late?
It was car trouble.
Yeah, whatever. Wolf, what's
going on with your face?
What? Oh, my...
My face? Yes, my face.
My face...
It's a publicity stunt.
For that new carnival game
that we have in development.
You look completely stupid.
Oh. Thank you, sir.
Thank you.
All right, I'm here
to see Big Fat Liar.
What do you have to show me?
You! Showtime.
So, we're all set for the big
launch tomorrow, right, Kelly?
Gotcha. Here. Start it.
No, no, no. No, no, Mr. Wolf! No, no,
no, no? Oh! You want me to do it?
Okay, here we go. Ready?
Big Fat Liar!
Bigger Fatter Liar!
What is this crap?
What is this crap?
I tried to tell you!
Yeah, we're still beta-testing, sir.
It's all very technical.
I know what
beta-testing means, Wolf!
Look, I am sick of your excuses.
We have millions committed to
the marketing campaign on this.
Get out of my way!
I'm sure that we can...
I want to see this game up and
running by 9:00 a.m. tomorrow.
Otherwise, I pull the plug
on Big Fat Liar and you.
Well... I...
There's a problem with the buffer overflow.
It keeps crashing.
I don't even know
what that means!
Well, we worked on it all night.
You know they lock the
bathrooms after 6:00 p.m.?
I had to pee in the sink.
You know, I have to be
on television in one hour
to promote a game
that doesn't exist!
Would you like me
to call and cancel?
No. I don't want to give
him the satisfaction.
Never mind.
Now, you listen to me,
you little mud weasel.
I want you to go back
to work and fix that game,
because if it goes down,
I go down,
and if I go down,
I'm not going down alone.
Tell maintenance
to rip that sink out.
Did you get it?
Who knew it would be so hard to find
these in San Francisco? But I got it.
Why do they call it
a "ghost pepper"?
Maybe because nobody who eats one
lives long enough to warn you not to.
So Judy's going to ask you a
few questions about the game,
and then we'll show some screen
shots to tell the story.
That sound okay?
Sounds great.
What exactly happened
to your face, anyways?
I don't know.
What happened to yours?
More eyebrows.
The other one.
Excuse me?
Excuse me.
Excuse me? Hi. Are you
the producer? Yes.
I'm Jeff.
I'm an intern at Highcroft Electronics,
and I'm totally embarrassed,
but I forgot to give Mr. Wolf his
energy drink before he left the office.
No problem. He's just... Could
you give it to him? Please?
I don't think I could take him
yelling at me again today.
Sure. No problem.
Poor kid.
Almost forgot your energy drink.
But I... I didn't...
In five, four, three, two...
Welcome back, everyone.
We are here now with Larry
Wolf, VP of Interactive and...
President of Interactive.
President of Interactive
at Highcroft Electronics.
Well, ifs nice to be here.
Well, your company is...
Here we go.
About to release its highly anticipated
game, Big Fat Liar, tomorrow,
to what is sure to be
a media extravaganza.
We are very excited about it.
Yes, now, I have to admit,
we were all a little miffed here
that we didn't get a chance
to play the game ourselves.
We are keeping this game
under lock and key.
It's... It's that good.
Now, there were rumors about...
There have been
some development issues...
Come on, come on!
With the game.
Is that true?
No, we're just not releasing a review copy
of the game because it's too exciting.
We just want everybody
to be surprised by it.
Okay, well,
that sounds fantastic.
Surely, you can tell us a little
bit about the game, though.
I can't.
Is it first-person shooter?
Or more of a puzzle game?
It's a...
Uh, maybe...
Mr. Wolf?
Mr. Wolf? Mr. Wolf?
Wolf, are you okay?
Serves you right, Wolf.
We'll be right back.
Yes! High five!
Today, Highcroft Electronics
interactive Division President Larry Wolf
had an unexpected meltdown
today on live television.
His bizarre behavior has some wondering...
Oh. Turn it off.
His bizarre behavior has some wondering...
Oh. Turn it off.
Well, Mr. Highcroft called.
I tried to tell him it
was some sort of allergic reaction.
He wants you to see the company
psychiatrist as soon as you get out.
But the... The game,
did it get fixed?
I'm afraid not.
No one seems to be able to
make it stop freezing up.
Why am I not in a private room?
Your credit card was declined, sir.
Oh! That kid!
I'm ruined.
I'm completely ruined.
I wish there was something that I
could do to help, I really do.
I know. What could you do?
You can barely type a letter.
There's only one person
who can help me now.
So let me get this straight.
I help you fix the game, and then you'll
call my dad to explain everything?
That's right.
You have my word.
No way. Make the call first,
and then he'll help you.
Well, what's to prevent you from not
honoring your side of the bargain?
What's to prevent you
from doing the same?
I like her. Feisty.
Kevin... Kev.
I'm just asking for your help.
This baby was your brainchild.
I need you.
It needs you.
You have my word.
You can't do this.
One of us has to trust the other one.
It's the only way.
Do we have a deal?
Wake up, wake up. Hey.
Come on.
What do you think?
You made me lose.
Pretty cool, Wolf.
Pretty cool.
I'll see you at
the launch tomorrow.
You know, kid, I gotta admit,
you really saved my butt.
Yup. Now you're gonna
save mine, right?
You got it. Yes.
When you're right, you're right.
Am I right?
Security. Bullpen.
Thank you.
What? What are you doing?
But you gave me your word.
We shook on it.
Well, maybe next time, you should
get that handshake in writing, huh?
Oh! Steroids. I thought I told you to
get the riff-raff out of my office.
I knew it.
Sorry, Mr. Wolf. I won't
let it happen again.
You know, when I first met you,
I really thought
you were something.
Big success. A big man.
All you really are
is a big, fat liar.
That hurts.
I'll remember that when I'm moving
into my new office on the top floor.
Steroids, make sure that they
get on the plane this time.
Will do, Mr. Wolf.
Move it.
I don't believe this. This
is a new low, even for you.
Well, be sure to mention that while
you're filing for unemployment insurance.
Okay, so what's the plan now?
The plan is we go home.
But what about Wolf?
What about Big Fat Liar?
It's over, Becca. He won.
Yeah, but the only way
he did was by lying.
I don't want to be
that guy anymore, Becca.
I don't want to end up
some sad little man
in clown makeup who has to lie
and steal from a kid
just to get ahead.
I don't want to lie anymore.
I want my dad to be proud of me.
I want to be proud of myself.
Anyway, thanks
for coming with me.
It was fun, even if we
didn't get we what came for.
You know what?
Maybe we did.
What do you mean?
I'm proud of you, Kevin.
It'll just be a minute.
My, you two certainly
racked up the bill.
Hi, Jimmy.
Mr. Wolf called
and said that I should
take over from here.
But I thought... He said to
take the rest of the day off.
See you two later.
What are you doing here?
Well, I was thinking about
delivering some payback
to my soon-to-be
Do you know of anybody
who would like to help me?
It's too late for that.
Yeah, we're going home.
So, what, you're just gonna let Mr.
Wolf take advantage of you?
You're not gonna stand up for
yourself and do what's right?
I just don't
want to lie anymore.
I'm not talking about lying.
I'm talking about making
somebody finally tell the truth.
Hurry up, hurry up! The
door's not gonna open itself!
Hey, don't I know you
from somewhere?
Oh, no.
What are you, crazy?
No! You were crazy to steal
from Ivan Slobodovich!
Look, I'm sorry, okay?
Hey! Slow down, will ya?
You know,
we can talk about this!
No, too late for talking.
NO, no!
Call office!
Would you like to call ice?
Not ice! Why would I want ice?
I want the office!
Call office!
Larry Wolf's office.
Penny! Penny,
help me! Help me.
I'm in the back of a limousine.
Yeah. Call the cops. The
driver's trying to kill me.
Sure thing, Mr. Wolf.
I'll get right on that.
Phase one is in progress.
Bravo team, move into position.
Where are we?
What, you want money?
Name your price.
I don't want money.
What do you want?
I want credit for my invention.
I can make it happen.
Just let me out of here.
And my old job back.
You're on the payroll
as of this second. Boom, bang!
And full health
insurance and dental.
No problem.
Do you have vision?
You only get 10% off
of frames and lenses,
and nothing off of contacts.
You know, it's a huge rip...
You want it? You got it.
Well, 10% isn't too bad.
Yeah, I'll pay for the rest of
it myself, out of my own pocket.
We got a deal?
No deal.
Looks like you're going to
miss your big launch party.
Ivan? Ivan?
Get me out of here!
Oh, no! No! No, no,
no, no, no, no!
Help me! Help me!
Need some help?
Hey! Kid, kid!
Make a call!
Tell them I'm on the tracks.
Tell them to stop the train.
You ready to tell the truth?
All you have to do is
tell my dad the truth.
"The truth"? The truth!
Highly overrated, kid.
Just admit you stole my idea.
Yeah, fine! Fine, fine, fine.
Fine, yeah, fine, fine,
fine. Yes. I stole it,
I stole Big Fat Liar.
You gave me the paper
in the back of my car
and I stole it.
Okay? You happy now?
Yup. That's all I wanted.
I'm gonna die!
I'm gonna die.
You've got a good team
working for you, Wolf.
You really should
treat them better.
Hey! Kid! No!
Give me that phone!
You... No!
Kid! No! Wait! Just...
Hey, kid!
Hey, kid!
Where are you going?
Give me back that phone!
Hey! Stop! Stop that kid!
Stop that kid!
Get him! Get him!
Stop him!
Stop that kid!
You idiot!
Watch your blood pressure.
Get down there!
Stay down there!
You idiot!
You can't outrun the Wolf.
Oh, I'm sorry for
the interruption, folks.
Game's over.
Beat it, kid.
I'm sorry for the way I look.
It's been a very strange day.
Out of the way, toad.
But enough about me.
You're not here for that.
You're not here for that.
No, you're hereto witness the
evolution of mobile gaming.
An evolution,
may I say a revolution,
that I championed here
at Highcroft Electronics,
long before this
new regime ever took over.
So, ladies and gentlemen,
may I introduce
Big Fat Liar!
Every day I'm getting
faster, stronger.
Every day I'm getting
faster and stronger.
Every day I'm getting
faster, stronger.
I'm gonna work you morons
like rented monkeys
until I tum this turd of a
department into a winner.
I'm gonna see to it that you spend
the rest of your pathetic life
programming talking baby
dolls till your ears bleed!
Well, that explains
the underwear.
I doubt that.
I don't play video games.
Video games are for losers
with nothing else to do.
I didn't... Did I say that?
No, I didn't.
Turn it off!
Turn it off now, or you're
all fired, you idiots!
Kid, the truth
is overrated, all right?
Just admit you stole my idea.
Fine. Fine, fine,
fine, fine, fine, fine, fine.
I admit it.
{stole Big Fat Liar.
You gave me your
stupid little paper
in the backseat of my car,
and I stole it!
You happy now?
God, I'm gonna die!
How did you get that?
I just destroyed your phone.
There's this new thing
these days called "email."
I sent the video as
soon as I got it. Duh.
You know, for the head of
an interactive division,
you really don't know
too much about technology.
Mr. Highcroft,
I can explain.
This is all a big
misunderstanding. It's...
You have 15 minutes
to clear out your desk.
It's a trick.
It's just a big...
It's a trick!
Gee, Wolf...
Looks like nobody believes
anything you say anymore.
Et tu, Jimmy?
I'm sorry, sir, but I don't understand
Latin. Must be all the steroids.
See ya, Wolf.
So Big Fat Liar was your idea?
Yes, sir.
Well, then show them.
Ladies and gentlemen,
I'm proud to introduce my...
- Our new game.
- Yeah!
Big Fat Liar.
Congratulations, son.
Dad, what are you doing here?
How did you...
Becca called her parents,
and her parents called me,
and, well, here we are.
Dad, I'm so sorry.
For everything. I promise
to never lie again.
We can talk about that later,
but right now,
I think they want you.
Kevin, I'm so proud of you.
It was actually designed
by high-school student
Kevin Shepard,
who I'm proud to announce will
be interning for us next summer.
- In other news...
- Kevin?
Yeah, Dad?
Two tickets to San Francisco?
Do you have any idea
how much that cost?
Oh, right. Here.
You can take it
out of my royalty check.
Sales for the gaming industry are
up 12% this year based on...
If that's not enough,
there should be another one
next week.
New graphics chip set,
sales are expected
to climb well into Christmas.
Something very heavy
at the end of this rope!
It's a large rock!
Here, I'm gonna pick it up.
The wind!
The Wind's coming!
The wind! Wait a minute!
The wind...
Oh, lookit, there's money flying
around in the wind! In the hat!
That's where the money goes!
That's where the money goes!
I'm in a glass box.
You suck.
No! You suck!
I don't go to your job and show
you how to use the plunger, do I?
No, I don't!
I'm in a box, a glass box.
Is there a teddy
bear in the room?
You know, I wouldn't bother...
There it is.
Let's cut the cameras.
Cut! Good.
No, not good.
Uh-huh. One more.
It's for emergencies only.
You got that?
Yeah. I got it.
When I'm standing in his office.
Ah, 'Cause...
He's got a tail.
My thing is...
Don't worry about it.
It's just a little white lie.
Hold on. Hang on a second.
I got another call.
This turned into
a one-act play!
First of all,
this was unplugged.
A mark.
And cut!
Good morning!
Can I sit here?
Perfect. ls that
okay for you?
I can't! I can't
get it off! What?
I'm gonna...
I'm gonna...
I'm gonna kill you!
Kill you!
Cut, cut, cut!
A mark.
No, no, no.
Mark it, baby.
I know, I looked at her for a
second, and then I looked away.
Sorry. Sorry. Sorry "aboot" that.
Sorry, sorry...
- Still rolling.
- Rolling!
She can't wait to
be done with me.
Come back.
And cut.
So I can stay...
Cut! Good.
And that, my darlings,
is a wrap.