Bombay Talkies (2013) Movie Script

"Here I come."
"I'm a showman."
"I've brought a series
of motion pictures with me."
"Each story is a new one,
a sweet one."
"Each tale is a piece
of magic of cinema."
"Here I come."
"I'm a showman."
"I've brought a bouquet of narrations,
some sweet and some not sweet."
"How did this magic come
to rule everyone's life?"
"Each tale is a piece
of magic of cinema."
"Take 10,
take 20 and then some more."
"Till you make 100,
a perfect score."
"100 is how old it is."
"This player hasn't aged."
"Take 10,
take 20 and then some more."
"Till you make 100,
a perfect score."
"100 is how old it is."
"This player hasn't aged."
"These tales are..."
"Pretty Awesome."
"There's happiness and sadness..."
"In different proportions."
"In different proportions."
"Take 10,
take 20 and then some more."
"Till you make 100,
a perfect score."
"100 is how old it is."
"This player hasn't aged."
Avi! What are you doing here?
What happened?!
Avi, wait! Your dad's asleep.
Get up!
I'm not a eunuch!
I'm a homosexual!
You do know the difference, right?
You are a professor!
It's neither wrong to be a eunuch,
nor to be homosexual!
The only thing 'wrong
is a person like you!
Did you hear me! Someone like you!
Get up!
"It's a strange tale.."
"Where does it begin,
where does it end?"
"Where do these destinations lie?"
"Neither could he understand,
nor could I."
"It's a strange tale.."
"Where does it begin,
where does it end?"
"Where do these destinations lie?"
"Neither could he understand,
nor could I."
"My best wishes are with you."
"For you are now an
apple of someone's eye."
"My best wishes are with you."
"For you are now an
apple of someone's eye."
"You have come so
close to someone..."
"That you've distanced
yourself from everyone else."
"It's a strange tale.."
See you later?
"Where does it begin,
where does it end?"
"Where do these destinations lie?"
"Neither could he understand,
nor could I."
"It's a strange tale.."
Good morning, ma'am. - Morning.
Good morning, ma'am.
I needed to discuss
some papers with you.
Just give me 2 minutes.
A wedding necklace around the neck
.and a hint of lust in the eyes.
Excuse me?
Who are you?
A new intern.
Temporary. For 3 months.
But I'll get a permanent
job if you recommend me.
Let's see if you last that long.
Trust me, I last very long.
By the way,
aren't you an associate editor?
Don't you have a
cabin or something here?
I feel suffocated
behind closed doors.
Do you have a problem with that?
- Not at all.
And the view from
here is great as 'well.
Quite hot, huh?
I, mo,
like Gold-Gym trained types.
Rough, tough, puff.
I'm gay, by the way.
What is this, madam?!
Such a at reaction?
I deserve an overreaction
over this statement.
Why? You are just a gay,
not a terrorist.
You should tell that to my dad.
He would've spared
me if I was Kasab.
He wants to hang me as I am gay.
I don't blame him.
I, mo, want to do the same.
Sorry. I want to impress you.
111at's why I am going
a little overboard.
I don't get impressed so quickly.
No stress. I've got 3 months.
What's your name?
Avinash what?
What's lies in this "What", ma'am?
It's this "What"
that has screwed me up.
Just plain and simple Avinash.
Can 'we 'work now'? - Yeah, sure.
Hurry up, guys.
We've to meet the deadline.
Amrita, c'mon.
Hurry up. We have to lock in 5.
Gayatri. - Yes? -What is this?
Stars first spread
the rumours then deny it.
We, mo, publish a
lie and then we write...
"Remained unavailable for comment."
It takes two to tango.
Nowlet me work. - Okay.
You want some... breadsticks?
You know...
I always wanted to know...
How do you come to
know if someone is gay?
Go and ask, "Are you a
Shridevi fan or a Madhuri fan?"
If he's a Shridevi fan
then he is definitely gay.
She's high cam, dude.
All gay men love her.
Wow. What analysis!
111ere's always an answer
for everything in Bollywood.
If the canvas looks lovely,
I'm going for it.
Have you met Rahul?
He's from our marketing team.
Hi. - Hey, dude.
By the way, big Shridevi fan.
I love the "Wild Winds" song.
Excuse me.
Shridevi, huh?
Love her.
Black with two sugars.
Okay, no sugar.
Go! Please!
Hey. - I think we'll do this.
Hmm? - Hello.
Present? Fifty shades of grey.
I've been avoiding it.
It's just cheap porn literature.
Means you'll read it for sure.
Of course.
Why are you in such a hurry?
I'm going to catch a movie.
MAMI festival.
I'm giving myself a treat.
It's my birthday.
It's your birthday!
Why didn't you tell me?!
What's there to tell?
It's like any other day.
Who are you going with?
Me and my loneliness.
I've bought a ticket
for it as well.
Nonsense. You're coming
over to my place for dinner.
No, Gayatri.
Why be formal? It's not a big deal.
It's a very big deal.
You're coming to my house, tonight.
No excuses. This is final.
Gayatri, listen to me.
- Otherwise, I'll reject it.
You'll be ready by 9?
Move. - Wow.
Smells good.
Thank God, I made a little extra.
For your surprise guest.
By the way what's her name?
His name is Avinash.
You invited a guy for dinner?
Why? Jealous?
You have this emotion
in you as well?
I thought you buried
it in your childhood.
Seriously. Who is he?
He's works with me in my office.
He's mad. He's gay.
He's 911V?
Okay. So this is the overreaction
he was talking about.
Thank you.
So you 'work for ON 'TV'?
Who do you do?
He works as a... - I'm a
political analyst and a newsreader.
I always wanted to meet one.
To ask what's the challenge
in telling about someone's death?
And it must be very
challenging to write about...
...the meaningless life
of Bollywood stars, right?
By the way, you are
talking about my profession.
I'm offended.
We've already talked about it,
Two years ago. - Oh wow.
I think you guys
are going to fight.
That's good.
It's said that the
make-up sex is the best.
Make-up sex!
Today is his birthday!
Happy birthday!
Happy birthday.
Thank you.
But Why aren't you making at me?
I am. - You still aren't.
I'm gay, but I don't bite.
Unless, someone wants me to.
Over familiarity.
It's not just his but
the problem of his generation.
Over familiarity.
I don't belong to my generation.
What do you mean?
I like everything big.
Big people. Big talks.
Old memories. Old songs.
Old songs?
Dev loves old Hindi film music.
Me mo.
What music, man!
"Come to me."
My all time favorite.
"Come to me." Madan Mohan, 1964.
Yeah, Madan Mohan, man.
What great music he used to create.
He was the most
underrated composer.
The more you praise
him the less it is.
Dev, why don't you take
him to your special room?
Why just special,
I'm ready to go into any room.
Just shut up!
He's my husband. - True.
"Come to me."
"For we might never get such
a night again." - Oh, my God.
Wow! What a room, Boss!
It's even better than sex!
You've got used to
crossing the limits.
It's now my profession.
You spend a lot
of time in this room.
Yes. Me and my loneliness.
To listen to music in solitude?
What's the story behind it?
Music changes the way you think.
And sometimes doesn't
even give you time to think.
May I? Jagjit Singh.
"Come closer..."
"Furl might not
come to you again."
You are smiling a lot.
What's the sorrow
that you're hiding?
"Embrace me..."
By the way, this was a question.
"For there might never be
such affection in the eyes again."
Gayatri. - Yes?
I wanted to talk to you in private.
Just keep trying.
I'll be back in 5. Hmm?
Yeah, tell me.
How often do you have
sex with your husband?
What? Are you mad?
I'm not going to discuss my sex
life with you in front of everyone.
Tell me.
It's very important for me.
Tell me, please.
What pleasure will
you gain from it?
Oh, God. - Now don't be a prude.
You come here everyday
dressed to kill.
Now why you are
acting like a virgin.
And yes, if you don't give me
the numbers, I'll ask for details.
Once or twice.
- In a week? Not bad!
In a month.
Sometimes, even longer.
- That's all?
Look, sex is over..
Sex is overrated, okay?
Many years after marriage,
it happens only sometimes.
And love?
Yes, Dev?
Yeah, I'm going
to be late from work.
Yeah, I'm going to mom's house.
Yeah, I'll see you.
Love you. Bye.
I'll have to see you later. - Yeah.
Gayatri isn't at home. -I know.
I came hereto give you this CD.
Raft's rare recordings.
You'll like them.
Thank you.
You want to come in or... - Oh no.
You want to come out?
You want to come out?
Just come with me.
Trust me, you'll not regret it.
But where?
Where are you taking us?
Just come with me.
Hurry up. - No, let's go back.
Come. Come. Come.
Come. Hurry up.
Hurry up now.
Just come.
Hey, where's Savitri?
I don't know. Try there.
Savitri !
Here you are.
Look, I've brought
a big shot with me.
Will you sing for us?
Get lost! I won't.
Please. - She doesn't want to sing.
Let's go.
Dev, please. One second.
Please. - I'll charge.
Yes, of course.
He has a lot of money. He'll pay.
Start on the count of four.
"Come to me."
"For we might never
get such a night again."
"For we might never meet again."
"Come to me."
"For we might never
get such a night again."
"For we might never meet again."
"Come to me."
"To me."
Pay UP-
Don't encourage this.
What will you do with the money?
I'll feed my siblings.
Are you lying?
No, sir.
I don't lie. It's bad to lie.
"We are fortunate
to get this moment."
"Look at me all you want
by getting close to me."
"For you might never
have this pleasure again."
"For we might never meet again."
"Come to me."
"To me."
I don't know what happened
to Dev last night.
He was in such a great mood.
He was very happy-
He didn't tell you why?
And, then
You guys had sex last night?
Yeah. And it was great!
What happened?
Nothing. Just not feeling well.
I'll see you later.
Are you okay? - Yeah.
So, we are going to telecast...
- Someone is hereto meet you.
There's someone 'waiting.
I'll get back to you later.
All okay? - Yeah.
What are you doing here?
Nothing. Was just in the area.
So I thought...
Your office is an hour away.
What do you mean, "In the area?"
Yeah, you got me.
I'm hereto meet you.
Just. I felt like it.
I'm recording.
- Yeah, but it's lunch time.
Subway's right around the corner.
Quick bite, maybe?
No! I'm working!
Recording can take
place after half an hour.
Are you crazy?!
I'm working! You'll have to go!
Place the mike.
Can't you give me half an hour?
Just leave!
I'll say bye and leave. - Bye.
Place the mike.
You want to hit me? - Just leave!
Hit me, I find it sexy.
Just leave.
Come on, Dev.
Just leave me! - You...
Someone stop them! Security!
Sir! Sir! Sir!
- Call the security!
Sir! Please control, sir! Sir!
Security is coming.
Sir! Let it be, sir!
Throw him out!
This man should never
enter this building again!
Please calm dovm sir!
Sir. Please, sir!
Please, sir! Relax.
'You are a eunuch!
A bloody eunuch!'
'I wonder if you are my child!'
'Look at me! I'm a man! A man!'
'I'm a man! I can never
give birth to a eunuch like you!'
'Listen, if you want to do
such a dirty deed then get out!'
'Get out of my house!
Get out! Get out!!'
'Don't show me your
face again! Out!'
I'm sorry.
Just go.
I'm really sorry.
I got your address
you're your office.
I just wanted to
come and apologise.
Just... Just go! Just go!
Hey, you are hurt, man.
Can you just go? Please! Just go!
I'll apply something unit.
Please. Do you have something?
Can you just go?
- Can I help you...
I'm sorry.
Are you okay?
I'm... I'm sad.
Get the hell out of here,
you bloody lunaticl!
Get the hell out of here!!!
We have to take this
up with the management.
This is serious.
They are just not listening...
- Gayatri...
What happened to your face?
Are you okay?
I'm just coming, okay?
Just give me a minute.
Oh, God.
Sol... - Your husband
kissed me last night.
You are mad!
Just give me a minute. I'm coming.
So, what was I saying?
Yes. So, who is going
to meet the management?
Gayatri, listen to me!
I heard you.
How was your day?
I always thought...
That I am doing something 'wrong.
111at something is wrong with me.
And hence
The problem laid in you.
All these years...
All I did was... live a lie.
I just hate lies.
I feel happy now.
I feel free.
"My best wishes are with you."
It's over.
"For you are now an
apple of someone's eye."
"For you are now an
apple of someone's eye."
"For you are now an
apple of someone's eye."
"You have come so
close to someone..."
"That you've distanced
yourself from everyone else."
"It's a strange tale.."
"Where does it begin,
where does it end?"
"Where do these destinations lie?"
"Neither could he understand,
nor could I."
"It's a strange tale.."
Pay up, sir.
I don't have any money.
You are lying.
It's bad to lie, right?
"It's a strange tale.."
111s neighbour yelled at me again
Anjali ate up the
batter for her son's fries
Her son slept hungry
Stop treating her like a film star,
she said
Walks in anywhere,
eats everything!
And her?
Fever's still running
My babykins likes fries?
See you mom
Don't call it a chicken.
Mia! No, an Amy!
Emu. Anjali
make me an omelette off her egg
You should know...
By rights you need two for that
Two? You bought ten!
Two hundred bucks profit
an egg! Four grand a day!
How did they all die?
Business has its ups and downs
How come your
business never looks up?
Hurry up now
Think 'we have time to kill?
Wasn't that tomorrovV?
Tomorrows today
Don't be late. They'll expect you
Who cares?
It's all fixed from before
Of course. I've fixed it
They'll never say no to you
Just like me
Tonight I'll tell you
a Hrithik story! Promise
Heard that
What about the Shahrukh one?
Heard that too
Need to see a film
to tell a new story!
It's not the story.
You don't like me anymore
Purandar, coming for the program tonight?
- Yeah, yeah
You want the Jobs page?
I am a businessman!
Why do I need a job?
Is there a Story page?
Something fresh?
Aren't you behind?
Aren't you late?
They said they needed
a security guard
They did
They 'waited
Then took someone
What do I look like to you?
It's a good job
A bit boring, but it suits you
Gotta stand like a zombie all day.
But it's good
Well done
How much?
It's mine
Not for sale
They're shooting a film
With Ranbir Kapoor
Go stare
Don't you want to?
He's too subtle for me
Get out of my sun
Ranbir's just tall that's all!
What's so star-like about that?
You think you're better?
I would be if I had
his family and connections
You don't have a
role in there, right?
Just hereto keep us off?
Everyone has a role here
The collision guy is not 'working!
We need a new one now!
You're from Satara, right?
Get me someone from the crowd!
My wife's from Sangli
I can tell where you come from
by the way you speak
Not the Extras!
From the real onlookers!
What's the title?
- Bad Attitude 2. Worth a billion
Natasha get the collision guy
from the onlookers!
Expensive film to make
Expensive to watch too
What's the story?
It's a big story
No. The little one. Move!
Will you act?
Can you act?
Please act!
Your name?
It's a small scene.
Over in minutes
With the Hero. Up for it?
What do I have to do?
I'll explain
Don't let him go. Call Costumes
You stay!
You ready?
- Of course he is!
You're the one!
Don't forget to sign my fanbook
Step over
No one bothers the artiste
this side of the rope
So, you 'walk this 'way.
The Hero 'walks this 'way
On my mark, you bump into him
Then you 'walk on
Is it right to bump the Hero?
Right is what I tell you to do
Artist ready! Call Ranbir!
Don't encourage him
MY lines?
If I get my lines
I could practice them well and...
Ma'm, Ranbir will take ten minutes
Right, your lines...
English? Hindi? Marathi?
Ok for you?
There you go
Practice away
You 'want a trailer now'?
It's quiet near the costume truck
"All the world is
a stage my friend!"
"And we're but puppets..."
"Go get a confession
from the man..."
"...who carved THIS on my arm!"
"I have..."
an appointment with death!"
"And my name..."
"My name..."
Villagers! Fellowlovers!"
"I'm only doing
what Shirin did for Farhaad..."
what Romeo did for Juliet!
Line too short for you?
Speechless in a speaking part?
"Fs a lie that I love life
more than your love...
...but your lie belies me
the love I love more than life!
Wanted something like that?
Aren't you dead?
Look who's talking
Show me the line
It's nothing. Waste of time
Know your problem?
If the line were longer
you'd complain it's too long
Why do you always taunt me?
Go. This is not for you
What's wrong with me?
This needs 'work
Not your cup of tea
This is
Why Can't I?
I was your understudy
for three years
Stood in for you in Sangli
when you had the Stroke
Did King of the Stage
for a whole week!
"A shelter! A roof!"
A roof! A shelter!
For the King of the Stage!
That 'was ME not you!
Everyone sawthat
broken old actor was me!
A young ingenue
111s applause wouldn't stop
Why can't I do this two bit part?
Because you love gifts
Happy new year!
Here's the State Award!
Merry Christmas!
Here's the lead part!
Teacher's had a stroke,
here's King of the Stage!
You don't like earning it.
You love getting gifts
What did I get?
I asked for the lead after Sangli
Did you give that?
Will you gift me
your father's pension?
Will you?
Your Social Security?
You play it safe
A job here. A business there.
111eatre when it suits you
And those who jumped
in blindfolded, risking all
Why should I gift you
what's theirs by right?
You wouldn't preach so if your
father was laid off by the mill
The mill closed domm
for all their fathers too!
They're 'waiting
Go and tell them "No"
By the way,
why's your character saying "Heyl"?
I bump in to the Hero and"
Frig the bump!
What happened before the bump?
What after it?
Are you saying it with your eyes?
Your gut? Your heart?
Which "Hey" is it?
I forgot, you're not doing it
I live here these days
She asked for you twice.
Shot's ready
You gave us a scare. Come
What's up? Stage fright?
The bump won't 'work
I can see the Hero from miles away
Why should we collide?
Natasha where's
the collision man?
You have a newspaper?
I read and walk. We bump.
I say my line and...
Think this is a joke?
Ma'am he wants a newspaper!
Good idea!
The Trumpet or The Front.
Not The Times
The glasses were a nice touch
Ever acted before?
Say something.
- What?
Where's the hero?
On his 'way. There he is!
Ranbir's on set!
That's him?
Straight that way. After action.
Not before it
Break a leg
Ranbir you wanna lose that cap?
You started really well!
We'll try it again
Cut! Focus!
Get that down out at there
Are we done?
Got to do it again
Who did he call a clovm?
He thinks he's funny. Never mind
Why did you stop?
You should have walked on!
Got it. Perfect. Moving on
It was good! You were good!
Even the big guys need seven takes
to get it right
You nailed it the first time!
Your number.
If there's something again...
Stay here. I'll get your money
Know what your father did today?
Because I'm beautiful,
I'll be Miss India.
And I'll send
every single child to school.
When I grow up I'll be ajockey...
because I like horses
and I like speed.
I want to be a veterinarian...
and build a big home
for all the street clogs.
I'll be an astronaut...
because there is no gravity
in outer space and I want to y.
I want to be a tennis player...
I want to represent India...
and appear on TV.
I can climb anywhere
and jump from anywhere.
And nothing will happen to me.
I'll be a lawyer...
I like helping people.
Moreover, I never lose an argument.
I'll become a cop.
I'll catch the thieves
and I'll get a bike.
I want to run my dad's factory.
And make lots of money.
I want to play football...
I don't know...
I don't like anything else.
Let's go!
Sir, not Haider, please!
Sir, we need him.
This one will score
for the other team.
See... Ronaldo.
Forget this game, we've lost.
Pass here...
Don't crowd around Sid.
Spread out and play.
Pass the ball.
Focus Vicky, don't be scared.
Come on... pass...
Come on, Vicky, win that ball.
Come on... move...
Sid... move!
Who are you passing to?
Make room.
Vicky, go for the ball.
Come on, Vicky.
Come on... run...
Vicky, move!
Tomorrow you start training.
Three times a 'week...
I don't want to learn football.
what you want doesn't matter.
What matters is
what's good for you.
Football will make you tough.
Dad, my class is going on
a field trip to Badami Caves.
We need to pay Rs 2000 for it.
Kavya, I just paid Rs 3000
for Vicky's coaching.
You go next year.
But my classmates are going now!
Forget your class,
I will take you to Badami Caves.
But they are so ancient.
What if they fall by next year?
All boys play football...
you will also have fun.
But I don't want to play.
Enough now.
If your dad wants
you to learn football...
that's what you will do.
After all,
he's asking you to play...
not scale a mountain!
But I hate it.
Goal, goal, goal!
I don't want to shoot a goal.
You want to see the movie?
You want to eat in a restaurant?
Then stop this drama.
If your father gets upset...
no movie and no dinner!
If you want to come, get dressed...
and allow me to get ready.
Come on!
Gaurav's here.
They are going to play cricket.
Tell him I'm not coming.
Can we get his bat?
They 'want your bat.
It's under the couch!
What are you doing?
What are you wearing?
Look at this crazy boy!
Is this a joke?
You find this funny?
He is only a child.
That's your lipstick he's rearing.
What are you'll turning him into?
- You shut up!
Isn't he in your clothes?
Did you make him wear this?
Do you have any sense?
He is your brother.
And you...
what are you?
What are you turning into?
What is your plan?
What will you be when you grow up?
Do you have an answer?
If I ever see you
like this again...
I'll break every bone in your body.
Stop this music.
You have turned this
house into a multiplex.
Heads are stuffed with filmy crap.
Hurry now, go change.
Do you know why dad was so angry'?
Vicky, please talk.
I shouldn't have
touched mom's things.
I think he was angry because...
you were dressed like a girl.
So means?
What's wrong in being a girl?
But, honestly I think destiny
has a lot to do with it.
And... I really feel
I've been very blessed...
that I've had such amazing support
from the audience and from my fans.
Fans and audience came much later.
But technically,
you're a miracle story.
Think about it, on paper...
you're a failure.
You should've failed.
Think about it...
a girl from England who doesn't
know anyone in the film industry...
and can't speak a word of Hindi...
and 'what, 5-6 years later...
you've done 30 films and
26-27 are superhits.
I mean, how...
what's the secret?
I just followed my dream.
There you have it people...
follow your dreams.
Katrina's simple
formula to success.
Nothing is that simple.
But if you have the will...
you will only do
what your heart says.
Yeah, but the world
is not a kind place.
I mean, how did you get people
to take you seriously?
Didn't people discourage you,
mock you?
That's why...
sometimes you have
to hide your dream.
What do you mean?
I mean, people don't
always understand you.
So they will discourage you.
But you know what your dream is.
So you have to keep it alive.
You have to nurture it.
You have to protect it.
And anyway, you don't have to
share everything with the world?
There's a right
time for everything.
You know...
you can do anything you want!
You can be who ever you want to be.
Follow your heart...
for there is magic in your dreams.
If you believe them...
they will come true.
Just believe it will happen...
and no one can stop you.
What are you doing?
Get off.
What were you doing?
I know what I want to be
when I grow up.
What's that?
Like Sheila.
I love dance.
She herself spoke to me last night.
Katrina Kaif?
You'll be late...
What's this?
I put that up.
I love Katrina Kaif.
You people...
Take that off.
Don't tell dad about
this dance stuff.
Only four days are left to pay
for the trip, I really want to go.
- How much is it?
- Rs. 2000
The society payment is due,
Rs 1500.
I suggest you bring
your classmates here.
Our building is also ancient.
It too may collapse by next year.
I've decided what I want to be
when I grow up.
Stop this nonsense,
or you'll get late.
I want to become a pilot.
To be a pilot
you have to be physically fit.
111at's why sports is good for you,
focus on sports.
Then you can be a pilot.
Vicky, give that packet to Kavya.
What is this?
It's for Kavya.
But my birthday is next month.
This is a surprise.
I thought you might like it.
And what about me?
Only for Kavya.
She isn't going on the trip.
I promise you can go next year.
This is your favourite...
Katrina Kaif!
Thank you!
Everything is for you.
Even my gift is
something that you want.
I don't want a bat.
I don't want football
coaching either.
But there is money for football
and not for my history trip.
You are so lucky,
it will be really boring.
Shut up, Vicky...
you are an idiot.
all yours.
Rs. 1750.
How much are we short by?
Rs. 250.
I need Rs. 2000 for my trip.
What's your dream?
Only if you let me sleep,
can I dream.
I mean...
howl want to be
a dancer like Sheila...
what do you want to be?
But I want to see the world.
I want to put up
a map on this wall...
and every country or city I visit,
I want to come back and put a tick unit.
Oh, so you want to
become an airhostess?
I want to be a passenger.
You know, there's magic in dreams.
Katrina said.
If you believe your dream...
it can be true.
Even hers came true.
You mean, if I believe...
I will go on the trip?
Dear Katrina...
please help my sister
to go on her trip.
You can go on the trip.
Dad said so?
No, I'm saying so.
But I need you to
promise me one thing.
Actually two.
You have to tell dad you got
all the money from the piggy bank.
And the other?
Whatever Katrina says,
you have to believe.
Don't you remember...
that I'm still Rs. 250 short?
Come with me...
We'll be back by 8:30 pm...
no TV!
Ladies and gentlemen...
thank you for coming here
on a Sunday afternoon.
For your viewing
pleasure we have...
all the way from A-vving,
apartment 14...
the one and only...
Sheila Sharma!
Come on, Vicky!
Come on!
All praise Lord Shiva!
My Guru is 116 years old...
he's fit as a Mestler...!
Brother jay!
What's up?
- Your father is unwell!
I'm working now!
I'll come home later.
My Guru lives in the Himalayas...
...he's come to the gathering for darshan...
- Brother Vijay...!
- Your father's calling you!
Buzz off... I'm working.
So I was saying...
- Brother...?
Your father is puking and pooping!
He's on his deathbed!
Sir, I must attend to my father!
Come on, boy...!
I'll come back later, sir.
- Brother, I want to pee!
Don't, this bridge can't handle
your tsunami-piss!
I must pee now!
- Boy, you're destroying this city piss by piss.
Mother! What happened?
Where were you, son?
I was at the holy gathering!
- Go in... he's calling you!
Shut the door, please!
What happened, father?
What were you doing?
Taking devotees for holy darshan
at the gathering.
Father, why did you call for me?
You knowwhen I was your age,
all I did was watch movies!
Then one day, your grandfather
fell very ill.
He'd had a stroke, you see!
111s local doctor
said he's a gunner!
So father called me and said
just one thing to me...
"I realized the true essence of life
after watching the film 'Two Rivers'..."
"And since then I've followed every
twitch of my idol Sir Dilip Kumar."
"Right from the film 'Two Rivers'
to 'Simple Gopi' to 'This World'..."
So then he gave me this
bottle of honey and said...
"Here...! Take this and
go to Mumbai and meet Sir Dilip."
"Request him to dip his finger
in the honey and lick it."
So I reached Mumbai...
...found Sir Dilip's abode
and waited in front of it.
For 3 'whole days!
Finally, I got his darshan!
I said, "Sir, my father
warships you."
"It would give him much joy if you dipped
your esteemed finger in this and licked it."
So the great man obliged me.
He dipped... and licked!
Your grandfather had a spoon
of that honey daily!
And lived for 6 years more than
the silly doc's 6 months prediction...!
He died only after
seeing 'The Merchant'...!
And on his deathbed, he finally
sang in his wife's ears...
So son, now it's time for...
Amitabh Bachchanm! I want
to be blessed by him like father!
I thought a lot about what would not rot and
last this journey you're about to take.
And so...
where's this... 'murabba'!
Ask him to please bite into it
and leave the rest for me.
The brightest star in the sky...
The Angry Young Man of cinema...
How he reeled into our hearts...!
...he came... we saw...
he conquered!
I'm going to Mumbai to meet
Amitabh Bachchan!
You see, he loves my
mother's murabba!
Every summer he calls her
and requests a fresh one.
I've been taking it to him
for 5 years.
So fondly he calls her
by her name... Malati!
But... just one murabba?
A single umbilical cord is enough
to bind the love of two people, man!!
Brother, you've reached Mumbai!
Every kid's favorite,
daughter or son...
You guessed it, it's Bachchanm!
His name seals a Super Hit.
He carved his fate with
his ovm True Grit.
A word to the heroes,
studs and laddies...
"Guess who's your daddy...!"
Give it up for Bachchan!
Brother, you said
I'll be there in a ash...
...but we're going
round in circles...!
Voila! The Bachchan house!
What's the fare?
- 2100 rupees.
Isn't that a lot?
Reaching Bachchan's house
is not cheap!
Any other actor's house
would've cost you just 500.
You must be from Allahbad.
I'm hereto meet
Amitabh Bachchan!
Amitabh Bachchanm?
You can't meet him now.
Tell him I'm from his hometown Allahbad
and my name is also 'Vijay'!
That won't 'work.
Back home, my home is only a kilometer
away from where he grew up.
Also, he uses my name on screen...
Please tell him all this... I'll
wait in the living room till then.
Ok, but this is not
the way to meet sir.
Then how'?
- If you 'want to meet him...
go to his other bungalow 'where
sir gives darshan to his devotees!
Hey, I don't want a darshan,
I want a meeting.
For darshan people usually
come to me back home!
See, he is a very busy man.
He can't meet anyone like this...
Yes, but my business with him
will take just 2 minutes.
Besides, we're practically cousins.
Why don't you write
him a letter...
stating your name and address...
- A letter?
And then...?
Then just post it!
Oh, that'll take too long!
Then courier it.
- I'm sure he has a phone, call him!
Now howwill we have
his phone number?
Then just call
someone 'who does.
How'? Today is Sunday...
our office is shut!
You're misunderstanding me...
I'm not hereto become an actor.
I've a small matter with him.
With your help I'll be done and
will gladly go back home!
But it doesn't work like this.
But you won't even call him!
- Just write a letter...
Are you from Allahbad?
- No, I'm from Kanpur!
Ah! That explains the gap
in our communication!
You see, 'when you tell him that
his namesake from his hometown...
a brother from another mother
has arrived, he won't say no!
This may all be true...
but 'what proof do 'we have?
You'll have proof when
you tell him, right?!
But he isn't in the city!
111at's why we suggest you write...
And that's why I suggest
calling him...!
We've explained the protocol
to you. Now please leave!
Don't touch, please...!
We've heard you out...!
- Plenty like you... Leave!
Don't get physical, please!
You guys are not making sense!
- Leave, man!
Ok, one last thing...!
At least tell me who has
sir's phone number?
In a 100 years there's been
no other...
God broke the mould 'when he
made The One!
Hey...! Bachchan!
His style gave the silver screen...
its glamour and gleam!
Hey... Bachchan!
His magic has such fury...
That temperatures go tandoori!
So to the Pitts, Clooneys
and Bradleys...
"You know who's your Daddy!"
Give it up for Bachchan!
Murabba, brother...!
What do you do?
I'm a huge Bachchan fan and I'm going
all over to tell people about him!
You know, "howwe love each other"
and "You gotta do the Bhangra...!"
Hey, egg-man...?
- Yeah!
Can I get a job here?
Work? Why not...?
You could start by putting
your bag dovm...!
Yeah, right here...
I'll keep an eye unit.
Serve this.
STo 'whom?
- The tall, dark one there..
So you're also hereto
become an actor?
I'm hereto meet
Amitabh Bachchan.
Wants to meet the Bachchan!
A meeting had brought
me here too!
- Sui Kumar'.!
The hero of 'My Foreign Lover'?
- Yup!
I sawa fair and slim maiden...
...her eyes were like such
piercing arrows...
...that my dear heart
instantly departed!
Fasten your bag with a chain.
And don't leave any
valuables inside!
What's so precious in this?
It's murabba!
- Yes!
So why's it so precious?
I'll tell you later!
Let me taste some, man?
But there's only one!
- So let's split it!
Actually, this murabba contains
everything my father ever cherished.
0k... let's sleep!
Just don't wake up anyone!
Remove your slippers, man!
Sleep now, I'll speak with
the landlord tomorrow
Here, cuddle your murabbam!
And don't disturb me at night!
- Yes, good night!
Where from?!
Allahbad. ls your name
also Amitabh Bachchan?
Oh, no... my name is jay!
Are you also Vijay?
- Yup.
So am I...!
What are you saying, brother?
Shake my hand, man!
Want a photograph with me?
Just 100 bucks for a snap.
- No, thanks...!
I'm hereto meet
Amitabh Bachchanm!
Consider it done.
- Just click a snap with me first!
Hey, run along!
How many times will I tell you
to not come here?
That poor soul has come from
Allahbad to meet him!
Bugger off. man!
I don't even know him!
I'm really not with him!
- So what? Leave!
Shaped by time... like old wine...
mmurabba has vintage...
go on, taste it!
With every passing season,
its avor defies reason...
It embodies every emotion...
go on, soak in it!
Oh my god, Murabbam!
It's gist is... the heart!
Its journey is
an astonishing story!
Hey, if you're going to come at
any time, you're fired.
You're my only hope, my home.
Oh God! I won't pay you any money,
I'll only give you food.
- Fine...!
Now come and go as you wish.
And please don't get
So, brother...!
Did you meet
Amitabh Bachchan?
How do you know
I've come to meet him?
I know, brother...!
How'? Who are you'?
Didn't recognize me?
"Don't recognize me, fucker?
111e city's given you amnesia?"
Oh, the other Vijay...?
- Amazing, isn't it...?
Where's your beard?
See, that's worn in the morning
and removed at night.
It's just a job!
Hey... move, fucker!
Which one oi you is jay?
I am...
- I am, sir...!
I'm Vijay Kumar.
Which Vijay do you mean?
- 111s one from Allahbad!
I am...
- I'm Vijay...
Ok, you come!
Hey, I've been waiting
for long too.
Look, you can go in
only once sir selects you.
But I simply want to
feed him this murabbam!
How can he eat this
moldy stuff?
What if gets an upset tummy?
Will you host 'Who wants to be a Millionaire'?
Sir, its my father's dying wish.
I'll go as soon as he bites into it.
Ok, let me see!
You wait here...
I'll deliver the jar inside.
Brother, did my work happen?
I've delivered your murabba inside.
Can you find out if
sir has eaten it?
Your murabba has gone to the lab
for analysis, to see if it can be eaten.
Amitabh Bachchan can't
eat just anything.
Please ask him to eat it. 'Cos
I don't have money to eat anymore.
I have to leave in 2 days.
I have a return ticket.
I can't bear it anymore... Aren't
Kanpur and Allahbad neighbours?
I've told you all I know.
I'm just a security guard!
If you don't help me, who will?
Please don't make me run around in circles.
Look, if I hear anything by 6 pm
I'll tell you, 0k?
But after the shift changes
please ask the next watchman.
What are you doing, man?
Don't crowd the drive way...!
Go, man!
Who is it?
What the...!
Just give me a minute,
please, brother!
Not even for a nano second!
- Please listen to me...
I can hear you well
from here!
How much will you take?
- Take what?
How much money will you charge to
feed Amitabh Bachchan the murabba?
- Sit dovm!
You should've just said earlier.
We could've saved time...
Nowadays everyone takes
a little money under the table...
Hey- why're you hitting me?
Bribing me...?
You'll bribe me?
My father served there.
Nnwl serve there.
You want to tarnish all these years
of loyalty with money?
I'm here for my
father's last wish...
I thought I'll fulfill it
in 2 minutes and leave...
...but this has turned into
a holy crusadem!
Please don't touch my feet...
I'm not a thief, brother. I want
to give him murabba, not poison.
Please understandmmy condition
is unbearable now.
I don't have money for food,
I've been thrown out of 'where I 'was staying.
They charge 2 bucks to take a shit
in this city! This is my plight.
Please don't touch my feet.
- Help me...
Enough... enough...
- Please, brother...
Tell you 'what...
come tomorrovw'?
You'll get it done?
- Yes.
Promise me... give me your word...
- I dn...!
I swear, man!
Just come tomorrow
You've promised me with
Gods as our witness.
My murabba is now your
solemn duty!
Yes, it is.
Just don't touch my feet.
This is not a temple, man!
- You're my saviour!
I'll get it done tomorrow.
I don't even have any place
to go to now...
But never mind that...
I'll come tomorrow
I'm in your hands now.
Brother, did you meet
Did you meet the Bachchan?
Did you meet him?
Did you meet the man, man?
Hey... wake up!
Here's your murabba!
Did Amitabh Bachchan eat it?
- Yup.
You sure it was him?
- Yes, he ate it.
What proof do you have?
Anyone could've eaten it, right?
One minute...!
Please show me your teeth.
I've seen his teeth in movies and
on TV. I'll know if it wasn't him.
He's eaten it, man.
- But...?
If he's eaten it why can't
he just say it himself?
Howwill that hurt him?
I've come all the way for this...
Hold on...!
Let him in!
(Amitabh Bachchan's
famous dialogues)
Let him in, please!
That's ok...!
Sir, I'm Vijay.
I'm from Allahbad!
My father is on his death bed, sir.
He has sent my mother's hand-made
murabba... please eat some!
Yes, I just did... wasn't it this one?
- Yes, sir!
But I didn't see it with my ovm eyes.
What will I say to father, sir?
I'd like to confirm...
so could you please... re-bite?
Alright... open it...!
It is imprisoned in shops...
Imprisoned in shops,
jailed in glass jars...
But it is born in our homes,
and raised from the seeds of hope.
Only by tasting it does one
know the meaning of sweet pain!
It reveals the truth...
and the heart of the matter!
With every passing season,
its avor defies reason...
I said, "...just tell him I'm
from his hometown..."
but they refused!
I said, "I've a tiny bit
of business with him"... but no!
Once they even said that
my sweet little murabba...
...sitting quietly above me...
needs to be tested in a labl!
So I said when my dear mother makes
her famous murabba at home...
...the 'whole colony comes over
to gorge on it.
But they made me dance between
bungalows... like a dog chasing its tail.
In fact, I actually
befriended a dog!
I said, "just tell him I'm from
his hometovm, he'll meet me..."
But no!
- Then 'what?
Finally, truth always wins!
News spread like fire and they
were forced to open the gate!
All of them with their tails
between their bum-less behinds.
So I entered, and
one took my bag...
looking sheepish as hell!
Starched uniforms
surrounded me in stunned silence.
Like frozen parrots.
But the [Mhhhadan
in me stayed in repose'.!
An Allahbad street vendor
is also an intellectual.
It's in our soil...
we can't help being great!
We drip intellect...
and integrity!
Such great men are from here.
Sir Bachchan being one of them.
Now those fools couldn't
see my inner Allahbad-ian...
Marinated in the sweet
juice of patience...
this jar preserves history!
Here... taste this murabbam!
Let it trickle into your heart!
Born from Life...
The longer it lives...
the richer it is.
The many seasons its savored...
resonate in its avor.
Always tastes better
than it did yesterday...
and tomorrows sweetness
will outshine today.
So here... taste this murabba!
Harnessed from the maker's love...
Here... taste this murabba!
It's enriched by
the maker's generosity... let this murabba
trickle into your heart!
Why have you lost so
much weight, son?
Weren't you eating?
- Where's father?
May you live long!
So Amitabh Bachchan met you?
- Yes... very nicely.
He ate it in front of
my ovm eyes.
And where did the jar break?
It... didn't.
It's the same one.
Where did it breakm?
Before you boarded the train,
or on it, or after you got off?
On the train.
And the murabba?
- It got squished under someone's shoe.
When your grandfather sent
me with the honey...
...ants had invaded
the 'whole bottle.
Sir Dilip refused to lick it!
He said...
"I would've...
but not this infested jar...!"
So I decided to dip my
ovm finger and licked it!
God knows if father lived due to the
proteins in the ants or the honey!
But I'll tell you this, my son...
don't ever put murabba
in a bottle of pickle!
Did you really meet
Amitabh bachchan?
Father asked me to,
so I did.
So what did he say?
Oh my God,
Amitabh Bachchan??
He just blessed me...
and I left!
And father?
"Don't ever put murabba
in a bottle of pickle!"