Bring Me the Head of the Machine Gun Woman (2012) Movie Script
1
PRICE FOR HIS HEAD:
PRICE FOR HER HEAD:
"BRING ME THE HEAD
OF THE MACHINE GUN WOMAN"
I got in through the back door...
I looked through the kitchen window...
and there were those assholes.
Twelve mother fuckers waiting for me.
Twelve guys?
Yes, twelve.
All of them aiming their guns
at the door and windows...
The bastards were armed to the teeth.
I had to go Clint Eastwood
on their asses...
How many bullets did you have left?
Only 8 bullets...
I didn't know then. I just made
my way shooting like a crazy person...
Everybody dropped dead on the floor...
I killed them all!
With only 8 bullets left?
With 8 bullets! That was it!
I don't know if they shot each other,
or bullets bounced...
I fucked them all up!
I won three stars!
Nice!
I knew you'd like it.
It's just like "GTA."
The game is awesome!
Thanks. I made a copy of it.
That's what I would like to do.
Invent a game, about anything.
But it allows you to play
any song you want.
Imagine having 40 thousand songs
to listen to while you play.
Very good, uh?
Would you stop it?
C'mon! Stop playing
those stupid things!
You spend the whole day
shooting and killing...
Why don't you go outside,
it's so nice out?
I want to be the best in the world!
There are people making
a living off this.
You have to stop doing this
and study, ok?
And get a decent job...
Without that nasty Argentinean
mobster!
Alright, man. I have to
go work next door.
You're leaving?
Yeah, I have a lot of
work to do yet.
Tell him about your salary.
Excuse me...
Can I speak to Don Che Sausage?
He's dancing.
But he told me he
can talk now.
He-is-dancing.
But he told me.
Well... I'll wait!
Piton!
Shut the door, don't let anybody in.
She is making you look bad...
That fucking bitch!
We were supposed to
hire professionals, Brancolli.
I sent her "El Chinchinero".
What? That bitch killed
the Chinchinero?
Yes, with no mercy.
Bring me the head of
the Machine Gun Woman...
Spread the word. The
reward is $300 million.
Put up posters in the
street like in the old west...
"Machine Gun Woman Wanted,
Dead Or Alive".
Preferably dead!
Ok...
What's that?
What's that smell?
It smells like shit...
CHE SAUSAGE
It's the DJ...
What?
The DJ.
What are you
still doing here?
I wanted to speak to.
Don Che Sausage...
Who wants to talk to me?
You or your ass?
Anything you want to discuss with him
you have to talk with me first.
Yes, I was going to do that but.
I think the kid is a little nervous...
Why don't you take him
to his place?
You know, to rest...
To rest.
in peace.
Tell Piton to join you.
Alright, kid! Wipe your
ass, we're leaving!
Wait, wait!
I can bring her.
What?
You, DJ? You can bring who?
The...
the Machine Gun Woman.
Who is Machine Gun Woman?
She is.
Don Che's ex girlfriend.
I met her when she
came over here.
I think I'm not getting it...
You mean. DJ...
A little brat who was scared shitless
by our little conversation...
You want to bring the
Machine Gun Woman over?
When Brancolli, my right hand.
A man that I've known
for over 9 years.
hired the best professionals,
isn't that right?
You spilt so much blood
in this fucking city.
To capture the woman
who wants to kill me.
And you couldn't do it,
could you?
This little bitch.
says that he can capture the most blood
thirsty woman on this continent?
This fucking dip shit...
To enjoy this, you have to suck hard...
You have 24 hours...
You're late, Chaguito.
Hi, mom.
Come here and give me a kiss.
I'm coming.
Hello? Israelito?
What was the name of that chick?
The one with a really weird name.
Blonde hair and wore a wig...
A friend of Che Sausage's ex girlfriend...
No, not that one...
Shadeline!
Shadeline Soto! Yeah, that one!
Do you know how I can reach her?
MISSION #01:
"GETTING A CLUE WITH SHADELINE SOTO"
Hello!
Hi, sweetie!
Two kisses...
How are you?
I'm fine.
What can I get you?
An Espresso.
Do you need it to wake up, daddy-o?
What's your name?
Margarita! And you are.?
Juan.
Juan Soto.
I'm Shadeline's cousin...
Really?
Yeah, I haven't seen her in a long while.
Shadeline!
Your cousin is here!
Hi, cousin...
Do I know you?
Well, I'm not your real cousin...
I need to reach The Machine Gun Woman.
You?
Yes. Me.
What for?
To take her to do what
she does best.
And what would that be?
I can't tell you here!
Are you a cop?
Do I look like a cop?
You're going to tip
me very well, ok?
Can I pay with a credit card?
Cash...
Five "orange" bills and
we talk later...
So?
I don't have "orange" bills but.
I have this.
I already have one of those.
It's not like this one! It contains
30 thousand songs...
I'm a DJ. Look, I'm giving you
years of downloaded music.
It has whatever song
you want!
Do you like Reggaeton?
I hate it.
What do you listen to?
I listen to...
Laura Pausini...
Got it!
Raffaella Carra...
Got it too!
New wave?
I got it all!
Lady Gaga?
I got everything!
Here! Take it!
Are you sure you want
to meet her?
A pretty boy like you
dealing with this.
You can lose your balls, sweetie.
Did you know that?
Are you sure?
Yes.
78, Lo Barnechea Street.
It's an auto repair shop...
You have to say this:
"I want my oil checked.
Very deeply"
Very deeply...
Are you shitting me?
It really seems like it, but it's true.
Please, I'm not an idiot.
I don't think you're
an idiot, sweetie...
Mekano came up with that code...
It's for filtering people. Alright?
How was it again?
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
MISSION #02
"OIL CHECKING"
Hello!
How can I help you?
Well.
I want my oil checked.
very deeply.
Ok! Go ahead.
Alright, that's good!
There you go!
I'll have to change the
air filter, I'll check inside...
First you have to change
the oil, stupid pig.
What the hell are you doing
with that wrench, you dumb fuck?
You're going to mess it up!
Hey!
Yeah?
I think you didn't understand me...
I don't want my oil changed...
I want my "oil checked".
"Very deeply".
Of course that fucker
didn't understand!
MEKANO
Hit Men Agent
Alright!
Go and buy some smokes!
Please, come in...
Go ahead...
Get in!
So, you want it very deeply, uh?
Yes.
You better drop your
pants, mother fucker!
You almost shat yourself, kiddo!
Yeah. You got me there!
Well, what do you need?
Hire The Machine Gun Woman.
The Machine Gun Woman...
Yeah.
What do you want her for?
I have many others.
She's the best.
She's the best and the
most expensive, man.
Yeah! But we can work
something out.
Are you shitting me?
Do you think this is a
grocery store or what?
Do you think I sell tomatoes?
Are you here to bargain?
No, man! Things are simple.
The fees are non-negotiable.
The guys who get all the way to here,
they know how we do things in here.
We have to make everybody happy.
Fifty-fifty.
Half up front and half
after the job is done.
Yeah.
Are you familiar with our website?
The Machine Gun Woman...
Damn, she's hot!
We got "El Tronador",
Mexican product...
for international jobs.
El Chinchinero was killed...
We have Magnum Gonzalez...
We also have "Mandrill",
this guy is very expensive.
How about "Panguinao"
AKA "Air Head"...
The call him that because
he doesn't have anything inside...
he just kills.
You're here because
you need to kill somebody, aren't you?
Yes. but she has to do it.
Why?
What?!
Pig! What happened?!
You, fucking pig!
Start talking, fucker!
Son of a bitch! What the fuck
do you think you're doing?
Alright, asshole!
You know why I'm here...
You're breaking the code, stupid!
You're going to pay for this.
Shut the fuck up!
Tell me where she is!
Do you want a bullet in
the head?
Tell me where she is!
Where, asshole!
In your mom's cunt!
Where is she?
I'm not going to talk,
mother fucker.
You won't talk, uh?
I'll make you talk!
How the fuck did you come up
with that damn cool secret code?
You're clever, asshole!
Ready to talk now?
No!
Or you want me to
check your oil very deeply?
Speak!
Last chance.
Alright! Alright!
You win!
Send a text message
from my cell phone.
Text the place and time. That's it!
Thank you, faggot! Thank you!
Did I hear something?
Anybody else want their oil checked?
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
Can I borrow a gun?
What an asshole!
What's wrong, kiddo?
If you want me to bring her,
you have to help me.
What are you thinking
asking us for a gun?
Machine Gun Woman.
Tarapaca Avenue and Zenteno,
that's where you get a gun.
They sell hand guns, shotguns,
grenades and Molotov Cocktails, anything!
You have to be careful...
Do you know what The Machine
Gun Woman did to Cowboy Ramon?
No.
He died.
No! She killed him.
And how did she kill him?
That chick is very dangerous, man!
She enetered in his brain...
And his brains
spread everywhere, man!
Cowboy Ramon!
God bless your soul!
He must be buried
like 10 feet under.
Alright, then...
Walk away, man! Walk away!
MISSION #03
"GETTING A GUN"
What do you need, pal?
A gun.
Model?
The easiest one to use.
Caliber?
I don't know. The easiest one.
What do you need the gun for?
To recommend a gun,
I need to know what you need it for.
Well the thing is. There is a sick horse mare
at my house and we don't want...
it to continue suffering, poor thing.
Do you have a license to carry a gun?
No, I don't have any.
How do you want me to sell you a gun,
when you don't even have a license?
No license, no gun.
Don't you have anything that you
can sell to me? Even without a license?
Sure! Starting guns,
replicas, air soft guns...
I don't think you can
kill a mare with it.
Which one is the most powerful?
Air soft gun.
May I see one?
You better take the
horse mare to a veterinarian...
you're going to hurt it but
you're not going to kill it.
What if, for instance, I accidentally
shoot a person with it?
What did the mare do to you
to make you so pissed?
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
MISSION #04
"HUNTING MACHINE GUN WOMAN DOWN"
I have a job for you...
I want you to.
I want you to kill Che Sausage.
Hey! Hands in air!
I'm going to shoot you.
What is this?
A toy gun?
It's an air soft gun...
Here.
So how much are they paying you
to kill me?
Who?!
Why are you with
Che Sausage's men?
They're following me.
Why?
I don't know.
They were going to kill me and I talked
them out of it saying that I'd find you.
And you found me.
Yes! I'm sorry!
Please, forgive me! I was just.
I'm a good boy, I'm the
DJ from the Tango Club.
Pussy!
Now!
Who is this?
This kid is the DJ from
the Tango Club.
Is it true that he was forced
to hunt me?
Yes.
Tell Che Sausage that...
... it was a nice try.
Go away.
I think you owe me one
reason to let you live.
Let's see.
I'll give you two options...
First, you tell me
something so powerful...
that it moves me or makes
me feel sorry for you.
Option two...
you tell me something so clever
that I end up liking you...
and I let you live.
I don't have anything to do with this!
I didn't know. I am a good boy...
I'm a DJ...
I live with my mom!
I'm going to cry!
Second option, then?
I can check your oil...
Very deeply.
Last chance...
I'll play a song. Yeah! That's it!
If you like it, you let me live...
If you don't like it. well, we'll see...
I'm waiting...
Turn it off!
Please.
I want you to leave...
They're going to kill you...
They're going to kill
you and your family...
Give me that tape.
Yes!
Take it.
Holy shit!
MISSION FAILED
MISSION #05
"ESCAPING THE CITY"
Hello, mom?
it's me...
We'll have to travel. Like right now!
Mom, don't ask me! It's just a trip!
A trip out of Chile. I need you
to pack your things...
I'll explain it to you
at home.
Please, don't ask me shit! Alright,
I'll talk to you when I get back.
What's up!
I can't open it, man!
Open it please!
Relax, man!
I'm in a hurry!
Easy, man!
What happened?
Some assholes were looking for you,
ugly bastards to say the least.
Is my Mom up there?
I don't see her down here...
Did you let those men go up?
Son of a.
How do you figure!
What do you think I do here?
You have keys, so you can
come and go as you please.
You live here, right?
Those ugly assholes
don't live here...
How are they going to come
and go as they please?
Let me in, please!
They even offered me money to
tell them where you were.
Did you say yes?
Yeah! $20 thousand pesos!
God damn it!
Did you tell them?
I didn't say anything, man!
I just gave them wrong information.
Thank God!
Relax, man! Don't rush me!
For fuck's sake.
Alright!
C'mon! Hurry up!
Mom?
Chago, I'm over here.
You didn't pack!
Why would I? Just because you
told me to over the phone?
Please, mom! Shit got real!
Pack your things! We need to go!
Explain everything to me first.
Let me explain it to you in the car!
Let's get out of here!
I bet you're involved with
that Argentinean gangster!
Pack your things!
Then I'll explain!
I'll stay right here until
you tell me everything!
C'mon! Just pack your things!
I'm in trouble! Please!
We're going to travel for some time,
maybe a week or more.
Is that gangster involved?
Yes! You're right!
Che Sausage is the
worst piece of shit ever.
But you are innocent!
I got into trouble by chance,
he is after me!
Let's call the cops!
If we call the cops we're fucked!
These guys kill people!
Who is it?
Silence! Don't make any sound!
It's them.
Don't call the cops!
I'll solve this!
Go to the kitchen, go now!
If they do something to you,
I'll kill them!
I'm coming, I'm coming!
Hey! What do you mean "Hey"?
Say: hello, boss!
Say hello!
Hello!
How are you, DJ?
You were supposed to be
after that bitch, weren't you?
Yes, I'm on it!
Are you packing?
It's a backpack.
I know it's a backpack!
I'm not stupid
I was told you met her. Where is she?
Damn, she's not here!
She went away!
Let's play a game...
I ask you questions and you answer me...
Is that clear?
Stay still, you're making me nervous!
Where is The Machine Gun Woman?
I don't know.
I was with her but she left...
She found out about the
two guys following me...
And she killed them!
She also found out that I
knew you and... she left.
She just left you there in peace?
Yes.
She didn't blow your head off...
She didn't stick a giant piece of wood
in your ass. None of that, right?
She didn't do anything...
You know what, boss?
Maybe this kid is right!
And The Machine Gun Woman
fell in love with him.
She found him cute and
she let him go...
A woman that can kill
any asshole that crosses her.
Love at first sight!
That might be it, boss!
Love at first sight!
You think so?
No, this is impossible. You invented
all of this. Nobody believes you!
Tell us the truth...
or I'll blow your face away...
I swear to God I was trying.
Let my son go!
No, Mom!
He has a gun, Chago!
They have guns!
Please, be quiet!
You had her hidden!
She is a real kitten...
Shut up!
Silence, silence.
Shut your mouth, kid!
We're not going to do anything...
If you don't want me to
hurt your mom...
you have to bring me that
other bitch, alright?
You have 3 hours left, kid...
3 hours. If you don't deliver,
I will have fun with this little bitch.
Please, don't hurt her! Please!
Hurt her?
3 hours, asshole!
MISSION FAILED
See you later!
Where is my cousin?
Say hi first!
Where is she?
She is talking to a guy
in the back.
Tell me, bitch!
Where is she!
Where?
Shadeline! Shadeline!
Help her...
Where is she now?
They're going to kill her.
Where?!
She is going to... .. .
Where?!
Shadeline!
Damn it!
MISSION #06
"HUNTING MACHINE GUN WOMAN DOWN"
Attempt 2
What?
The heads...
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
Help me to kill Sausage...
I'll do anything...
Anything you want...
If you don't remove that bullet
I'll die right here...
That would work for you, right?
It's easier to turn me in if I'm dead.
I would do that...
But you're not like me.
You are thankful because
I saved your life...
right?
Have you ever removed a bullet before?
No...
There is a medicine kit in the back...
There is rubbing alcohol, bandages
and a pin...
I'm trying, I'm trying...
I got it, I got it!
Do you want to check my oil?
I'm not going to untie you.
You don't have to do it...
I was the one who played
your song at the Tango Club...
My song?
"The Falling Star, No Time For Love"
I played it once and saw
that you liked it...
Then I played it every day.
To see you dance.
Help me.
Let's pretend you turn me in,
we go armed and then.
we trap them like rats.
Do you really believe you'll be
freed if you turn me in?
You know too much... Do you
really think he is going to let you go?
You know what's going to happen...
You are dead man walking...
even if you turn me in.
I'm going to untie the ropes...
when we arrive at the Tango Club...
That way, you'll be forced
to kill them all.
Sounds like a good deal to me.
MISSION #07
"KILL CHE SAUSAGE"
Is Don Che Sausage here?
Untie me!
Wait!
I can't believe you, DJ...
You brought that bitch
all the way here!
Be careful with my mom!
Give me the gun...
Tell her to put the gun down!
Tell her! Now!
You didn't tell me
they had your mom.
What are you waiting for, kiddo?
What part did you not
understand, asshole!
Tell her to put the gun down or do you
want me to blow her brains out?
Put the gun down, I said!
Drop the gun.
Drop the gun, please.
I don't have any other option!
Kill her, asshole!
Kill her now!
Drop it...
Well done... well done...
That's how I like it...
Let my mom go.
"Let my mom go"
What did this asshole say?
"Let my mom go"
Your mom likes Sausage,
did you know that?
Get over there!
Let's get out of here! Let's go!
MISSION FAILED
Look, mom! You'll be staying here
for a couple of days.
Be careful!
Hurry up!
They can see you!
Shit...
FINAL MISSION:
"KILL CHE SAUSAGE +
RESCUE MACHINE GUN WOMAN"
He is here!
Get out of here, bro!
You are fucking crazy, man!
What are you doing?!
What?
Don't tell me that this
little bitch moved its little tail...
And you fell in love.
Let her go, asshole!
Wow! How tough...
"Let her go", "Let her go"
There is a difference between
having balls...
and having the most idiotic asshole
that has entered my place!
This is suicidal for you...
Did you know that? A suicide?
In case I don't kill you,
she'll end up doing it.
I'd rather get killed by her.
Well, I'm not going to allow that...
Untie me...
Wait! Don't! Don't!
Let the cops get him and die in jail.
Why?
You're not like this...
I know you are not like this...
I'm seeing it right now...
Let's go away together...
I could go away with you.
With you and your Mommy.
But you'll have to accept my habits...
And get used to my temper.
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
Let's go!
PRICE FOR HIS HEAD:
PRICE FOR HER HEAD:
"BRING ME THE HEAD
OF THE MACHINE GUN WOMAN"
I got in through the back door...
I looked through the kitchen window...
and there were those assholes.
Twelve mother fuckers waiting for me.
Twelve guys?
Yes, twelve.
All of them aiming their guns
at the door and windows...
The bastards were armed to the teeth.
I had to go Clint Eastwood
on their asses...
How many bullets did you have left?
Only 8 bullets...
I didn't know then. I just made
my way shooting like a crazy person...
Everybody dropped dead on the floor...
I killed them all!
With only 8 bullets left?
With 8 bullets! That was it!
I don't know if they shot each other,
or bullets bounced...
I fucked them all up!
I won three stars!
Nice!
I knew you'd like it.
It's just like "GTA."
The game is awesome!
Thanks. I made a copy of it.
That's what I would like to do.
Invent a game, about anything.
But it allows you to play
any song you want.
Imagine having 40 thousand songs
to listen to while you play.
Very good, uh?
Would you stop it?
C'mon! Stop playing
those stupid things!
You spend the whole day
shooting and killing...
Why don't you go outside,
it's so nice out?
I want to be the best in the world!
There are people making
a living off this.
You have to stop doing this
and study, ok?
And get a decent job...
Without that nasty Argentinean
mobster!
Alright, man. I have to
go work next door.
You're leaving?
Yeah, I have a lot of
work to do yet.
Tell him about your salary.
Excuse me...
Can I speak to Don Che Sausage?
He's dancing.
But he told me he
can talk now.
He-is-dancing.
But he told me.
Well... I'll wait!
Piton!
Shut the door, don't let anybody in.
She is making you look bad...
That fucking bitch!
We were supposed to
hire professionals, Brancolli.
I sent her "El Chinchinero".
What? That bitch killed
the Chinchinero?
Yes, with no mercy.
Bring me the head of
the Machine Gun Woman...
Spread the word. The
reward is $300 million.
Put up posters in the
street like in the old west...
"Machine Gun Woman Wanted,
Dead Or Alive".
Preferably dead!
Ok...
What's that?
What's that smell?
It smells like shit...
CHE SAUSAGE
It's the DJ...
What?
The DJ.
What are you
still doing here?
I wanted to speak to.
Don Che Sausage...
Who wants to talk to me?
You or your ass?
Anything you want to discuss with him
you have to talk with me first.
Yes, I was going to do that but.
I think the kid is a little nervous...
Why don't you take him
to his place?
You know, to rest...
To rest.
in peace.
Tell Piton to join you.
Alright, kid! Wipe your
ass, we're leaving!
Wait, wait!
I can bring her.
What?
You, DJ? You can bring who?
The...
the Machine Gun Woman.
Who is Machine Gun Woman?
She is.
Don Che's ex girlfriend.
I met her when she
came over here.
I think I'm not getting it...
You mean. DJ...
A little brat who was scared shitless
by our little conversation...
You want to bring the
Machine Gun Woman over?
When Brancolli, my right hand.
A man that I've known
for over 9 years.
hired the best professionals,
isn't that right?
You spilt so much blood
in this fucking city.
To capture the woman
who wants to kill me.
And you couldn't do it,
could you?
This little bitch.
says that he can capture the most blood
thirsty woman on this continent?
This fucking dip shit...
To enjoy this, you have to suck hard...
You have 24 hours...
You're late, Chaguito.
Hi, mom.
Come here and give me a kiss.
I'm coming.
Hello? Israelito?
What was the name of that chick?
The one with a really weird name.
Blonde hair and wore a wig...
A friend of Che Sausage's ex girlfriend...
No, not that one...
Shadeline!
Shadeline Soto! Yeah, that one!
Do you know how I can reach her?
MISSION #01:
"GETTING A CLUE WITH SHADELINE SOTO"
Hello!
Hi, sweetie!
Two kisses...
How are you?
I'm fine.
What can I get you?
An Espresso.
Do you need it to wake up, daddy-o?
What's your name?
Margarita! And you are.?
Juan.
Juan Soto.
I'm Shadeline's cousin...
Really?
Yeah, I haven't seen her in a long while.
Shadeline!
Your cousin is here!
Hi, cousin...
Do I know you?
Well, I'm not your real cousin...
I need to reach The Machine Gun Woman.
You?
Yes. Me.
What for?
To take her to do what
she does best.
And what would that be?
I can't tell you here!
Are you a cop?
Do I look like a cop?
You're going to tip
me very well, ok?
Can I pay with a credit card?
Cash...
Five "orange" bills and
we talk later...
So?
I don't have "orange" bills but.
I have this.
I already have one of those.
It's not like this one! It contains
30 thousand songs...
I'm a DJ. Look, I'm giving you
years of downloaded music.
It has whatever song
you want!
Do you like Reggaeton?
I hate it.
What do you listen to?
I listen to...
Laura Pausini...
Got it!
Raffaella Carra...
Got it too!
New wave?
I got it all!
Lady Gaga?
I got everything!
Here! Take it!
Are you sure you want
to meet her?
A pretty boy like you
dealing with this.
You can lose your balls, sweetie.
Did you know that?
Are you sure?
Yes.
78, Lo Barnechea Street.
It's an auto repair shop...
You have to say this:
"I want my oil checked.
Very deeply"
Very deeply...
Are you shitting me?
It really seems like it, but it's true.
Please, I'm not an idiot.
I don't think you're
an idiot, sweetie...
Mekano came up with that code...
It's for filtering people. Alright?
How was it again?
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
MISSION #02
"OIL CHECKING"
Hello!
How can I help you?
Well.
I want my oil checked.
very deeply.
Ok! Go ahead.
Alright, that's good!
There you go!
I'll have to change the
air filter, I'll check inside...
First you have to change
the oil, stupid pig.
What the hell are you doing
with that wrench, you dumb fuck?
You're going to mess it up!
Hey!
Yeah?
I think you didn't understand me...
I don't want my oil changed...
I want my "oil checked".
"Very deeply".
Of course that fucker
didn't understand!
MEKANO
Hit Men Agent
Alright!
Go and buy some smokes!
Please, come in...
Go ahead...
Get in!
So, you want it very deeply, uh?
Yes.
You better drop your
pants, mother fucker!
You almost shat yourself, kiddo!
Yeah. You got me there!
Well, what do you need?
Hire The Machine Gun Woman.
The Machine Gun Woman...
Yeah.
What do you want her for?
I have many others.
She's the best.
She's the best and the
most expensive, man.
Yeah! But we can work
something out.
Are you shitting me?
Do you think this is a
grocery store or what?
Do you think I sell tomatoes?
Are you here to bargain?
No, man! Things are simple.
The fees are non-negotiable.
The guys who get all the way to here,
they know how we do things in here.
We have to make everybody happy.
Fifty-fifty.
Half up front and half
after the job is done.
Yeah.
Are you familiar with our website?
The Machine Gun Woman...
Damn, she's hot!
We got "El Tronador",
Mexican product...
for international jobs.
El Chinchinero was killed...
We have Magnum Gonzalez...
We also have "Mandrill",
this guy is very expensive.
How about "Panguinao"
AKA "Air Head"...
The call him that because
he doesn't have anything inside...
he just kills.
You're here because
you need to kill somebody, aren't you?
Yes. but she has to do it.
Why?
What?!
Pig! What happened?!
You, fucking pig!
Start talking, fucker!
Son of a bitch! What the fuck
do you think you're doing?
Alright, asshole!
You know why I'm here...
You're breaking the code, stupid!
You're going to pay for this.
Shut the fuck up!
Tell me where she is!
Do you want a bullet in
the head?
Tell me where she is!
Where, asshole!
In your mom's cunt!
Where is she?
I'm not going to talk,
mother fucker.
You won't talk, uh?
I'll make you talk!
How the fuck did you come up
with that damn cool secret code?
You're clever, asshole!
Ready to talk now?
No!
Or you want me to
check your oil very deeply?
Speak!
Last chance.
Alright! Alright!
You win!
Send a text message
from my cell phone.
Text the place and time. That's it!
Thank you, faggot! Thank you!
Did I hear something?
Anybody else want their oil checked?
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
Can I borrow a gun?
What an asshole!
What's wrong, kiddo?
If you want me to bring her,
you have to help me.
What are you thinking
asking us for a gun?
Machine Gun Woman.
Tarapaca Avenue and Zenteno,
that's where you get a gun.
They sell hand guns, shotguns,
grenades and Molotov Cocktails, anything!
You have to be careful...
Do you know what The Machine
Gun Woman did to Cowboy Ramon?
No.
He died.
No! She killed him.
And how did she kill him?
That chick is very dangerous, man!
She enetered in his brain...
And his brains
spread everywhere, man!
Cowboy Ramon!
God bless your soul!
He must be buried
like 10 feet under.
Alright, then...
Walk away, man! Walk away!
MISSION #03
"GETTING A GUN"
What do you need, pal?
A gun.
Model?
The easiest one to use.
Caliber?
I don't know. The easiest one.
What do you need the gun for?
To recommend a gun,
I need to know what you need it for.
Well the thing is. There is a sick horse mare
at my house and we don't want...
it to continue suffering, poor thing.
Do you have a license to carry a gun?
No, I don't have any.
How do you want me to sell you a gun,
when you don't even have a license?
No license, no gun.
Don't you have anything that you
can sell to me? Even without a license?
Sure! Starting guns,
replicas, air soft guns...
I don't think you can
kill a mare with it.
Which one is the most powerful?
Air soft gun.
May I see one?
You better take the
horse mare to a veterinarian...
you're going to hurt it but
you're not going to kill it.
What if, for instance, I accidentally
shoot a person with it?
What did the mare do to you
to make you so pissed?
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
MISSION #04
"HUNTING MACHINE GUN WOMAN DOWN"
I have a job for you...
I want you to.
I want you to kill Che Sausage.
Hey! Hands in air!
I'm going to shoot you.
What is this?
A toy gun?
It's an air soft gun...
Here.
So how much are they paying you
to kill me?
Who?!
Why are you with
Che Sausage's men?
They're following me.
Why?
I don't know.
They were going to kill me and I talked
them out of it saying that I'd find you.
And you found me.
Yes! I'm sorry!
Please, forgive me! I was just.
I'm a good boy, I'm the
DJ from the Tango Club.
Pussy!
Now!
Who is this?
This kid is the DJ from
the Tango Club.
Is it true that he was forced
to hunt me?
Yes.
Tell Che Sausage that...
... it was a nice try.
Go away.
I think you owe me one
reason to let you live.
Let's see.
I'll give you two options...
First, you tell me
something so powerful...
that it moves me or makes
me feel sorry for you.
Option two...
you tell me something so clever
that I end up liking you...
and I let you live.
I don't have anything to do with this!
I didn't know. I am a good boy...
I'm a DJ...
I live with my mom!
I'm going to cry!
Second option, then?
I can check your oil...
Very deeply.
Last chance...
I'll play a song. Yeah! That's it!
If you like it, you let me live...
If you don't like it. well, we'll see...
I'm waiting...
Turn it off!
Please.
I want you to leave...
They're going to kill you...
They're going to kill
you and your family...
Give me that tape.
Yes!
Take it.
Holy shit!
MISSION FAILED
MISSION #05
"ESCAPING THE CITY"
Hello, mom?
it's me...
We'll have to travel. Like right now!
Mom, don't ask me! It's just a trip!
A trip out of Chile. I need you
to pack your things...
I'll explain it to you
at home.
Please, don't ask me shit! Alright,
I'll talk to you when I get back.
What's up!
I can't open it, man!
Open it please!
Relax, man!
I'm in a hurry!
Easy, man!
What happened?
Some assholes were looking for you,
ugly bastards to say the least.
Is my Mom up there?
I don't see her down here...
Did you let those men go up?
Son of a.
How do you figure!
What do you think I do here?
You have keys, so you can
come and go as you please.
You live here, right?
Those ugly assholes
don't live here...
How are they going to come
and go as they please?
Let me in, please!
They even offered me money to
tell them where you were.
Did you say yes?
Yeah! $20 thousand pesos!
God damn it!
Did you tell them?
I didn't say anything, man!
I just gave them wrong information.
Thank God!
Relax, man! Don't rush me!
For fuck's sake.
Alright!
C'mon! Hurry up!
Mom?
Chago, I'm over here.
You didn't pack!
Why would I? Just because you
told me to over the phone?
Please, mom! Shit got real!
Pack your things! We need to go!
Explain everything to me first.
Let me explain it to you in the car!
Let's get out of here!
I bet you're involved with
that Argentinean gangster!
Pack your things!
Then I'll explain!
I'll stay right here until
you tell me everything!
C'mon! Just pack your things!
I'm in trouble! Please!
We're going to travel for some time,
maybe a week or more.
Is that gangster involved?
Yes! You're right!
Che Sausage is the
worst piece of shit ever.
But you are innocent!
I got into trouble by chance,
he is after me!
Let's call the cops!
If we call the cops we're fucked!
These guys kill people!
Who is it?
Silence! Don't make any sound!
It's them.
Don't call the cops!
I'll solve this!
Go to the kitchen, go now!
If they do something to you,
I'll kill them!
I'm coming, I'm coming!
Hey! What do you mean "Hey"?
Say: hello, boss!
Say hello!
Hello!
How are you, DJ?
You were supposed to be
after that bitch, weren't you?
Yes, I'm on it!
Are you packing?
It's a backpack.
I know it's a backpack!
I'm not stupid
I was told you met her. Where is she?
Damn, she's not here!
She went away!
Let's play a game...
I ask you questions and you answer me...
Is that clear?
Stay still, you're making me nervous!
Where is The Machine Gun Woman?
I don't know.
I was with her but she left...
She found out about the
two guys following me...
And she killed them!
She also found out that I
knew you and... she left.
She just left you there in peace?
Yes.
She didn't blow your head off...
She didn't stick a giant piece of wood
in your ass. None of that, right?
She didn't do anything...
You know what, boss?
Maybe this kid is right!
And The Machine Gun Woman
fell in love with him.
She found him cute and
she let him go...
A woman that can kill
any asshole that crosses her.
Love at first sight!
That might be it, boss!
Love at first sight!
You think so?
No, this is impossible. You invented
all of this. Nobody believes you!
Tell us the truth...
or I'll blow your face away...
I swear to God I was trying.
Let my son go!
No, Mom!
He has a gun, Chago!
They have guns!
Please, be quiet!
You had her hidden!
She is a real kitten...
Shut up!
Silence, silence.
Shut your mouth, kid!
We're not going to do anything...
If you don't want me to
hurt your mom...
you have to bring me that
other bitch, alright?
You have 3 hours left, kid...
3 hours. If you don't deliver,
I will have fun with this little bitch.
Please, don't hurt her! Please!
Hurt her?
3 hours, asshole!
MISSION FAILED
See you later!
Where is my cousin?
Say hi first!
Where is she?
She is talking to a guy
in the back.
Tell me, bitch!
Where is she!
Where?
Shadeline! Shadeline!
Help her...
Where is she now?
They're going to kill her.
Where?!
She is going to... .. .
Where?!
Shadeline!
Damn it!
MISSION #06
"HUNTING MACHINE GUN WOMAN DOWN"
Attempt 2
What?
The heads...
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
Help me to kill Sausage...
I'll do anything...
Anything you want...
If you don't remove that bullet
I'll die right here...
That would work for you, right?
It's easier to turn me in if I'm dead.
I would do that...
But you're not like me.
You are thankful because
I saved your life...
right?
Have you ever removed a bullet before?
No...
There is a medicine kit in the back...
There is rubbing alcohol, bandages
and a pin...
I'm trying, I'm trying...
I got it, I got it!
Do you want to check my oil?
I'm not going to untie you.
You don't have to do it...
I was the one who played
your song at the Tango Club...
My song?
"The Falling Star, No Time For Love"
I played it once and saw
that you liked it...
Then I played it every day.
To see you dance.
Help me.
Let's pretend you turn me in,
we go armed and then.
we trap them like rats.
Do you really believe you'll be
freed if you turn me in?
You know too much... Do you
really think he is going to let you go?
You know what's going to happen...
You are dead man walking...
even if you turn me in.
I'm going to untie the ropes...
when we arrive at the Tango Club...
That way, you'll be forced
to kill them all.
Sounds like a good deal to me.
MISSION #07
"KILL CHE SAUSAGE"
Is Don Che Sausage here?
Untie me!
Wait!
I can't believe you, DJ...
You brought that bitch
all the way here!
Be careful with my mom!
Give me the gun...
Tell her to put the gun down!
Tell her! Now!
You didn't tell me
they had your mom.
What are you waiting for, kiddo?
What part did you not
understand, asshole!
Tell her to put the gun down or do you
want me to blow her brains out?
Put the gun down, I said!
Drop the gun.
Drop the gun, please.
I don't have any other option!
Kill her, asshole!
Kill her now!
Drop it...
Well done... well done...
That's how I like it...
Let my mom go.
"Let my mom go"
What did this asshole say?
"Let my mom go"
Your mom likes Sausage,
did you know that?
Get over there!
Let's get out of here! Let's go!
MISSION FAILED
Look, mom! You'll be staying here
for a couple of days.
Be careful!
Hurry up!
They can see you!
Shit...
FINAL MISSION:
"KILL CHE SAUSAGE +
RESCUE MACHINE GUN WOMAN"
He is here!
Get out of here, bro!
You are fucking crazy, man!
What are you doing?!
What?
Don't tell me that this
little bitch moved its little tail...
And you fell in love.
Let her go, asshole!
Wow! How tough...
"Let her go", "Let her go"
There is a difference between
having balls...
and having the most idiotic asshole
that has entered my place!
This is suicidal for you...
Did you know that? A suicide?
In case I don't kill you,
she'll end up doing it.
I'd rather get killed by her.
Well, I'm not going to allow that...
Untie me...
Wait! Don't! Don't!
Let the cops get him and die in jail.
Why?
You're not like this...
I know you are not like this...
I'm seeing it right now...
Let's go away together...
I could go away with you.
With you and your Mommy.
But you'll have to accept my habits...
And get used to my temper.
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!
Let's go!