Bump: A Christmas Film (2025) Movie Script
1
(CHURCH ORGAN PLAYS
'HARK! THE HERALD ANGELS SING')
(CRACK!)
ANGIE: I know exactly
how you feel about Christmas.
It's work.
It's stressful.
There's so much plastic
and so much waste.
The kids get too much junk.
The music's terrible.
The expectations are crushing.
The forced cheer
is self-defeating.
And the family is exhausted,
which is exactly why, this year,
I think we should do
something different.
(CHURCH ORGAN SLOWS
AND DISTORTS)
(BELLS RING DISCORDANTLY)
(SANTI SPEAKS SPANISH)
OLY: Don't even know
if we need all of this stuff.
But it's the Jelly stuff and...
(WHISPERS)
...it's the Santa stuff.
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
I packed for several
climate zones
because it's tropical but
it gets cold in the mountains.
I don't even wanna
do the Santa thing.
-We're gaslighting J.
-(DUOLINGO CHIMES)
The imperative to consume
is insane
and the whole concept erases
mothers who do all of the work.
And gives all the credit
to Santa.
Mum! Mum!
Why does Angelo have to come?
Darling, if 16-year-old me
can go straight back to school
with a newborn,
I'm pretty sure I can handle
a holiday with a baby.
SANTI:
Ay, boys! Hurry up!
(PLANE ROARS OVERHEAD)
(CAR DOOR SLAMS)
Tough life chose me.
A big holiday in Colombia!
GABE: We went
when I was little, Mum.
It was kind of lame.
Food sucked
and I got sick, so...
ROSA: Oh, my God.
Well, this time you're
gonna love Colombia.
And everything's gonna
be perfect. Now let's go.
(GLASS SMASHES)
(GABE AND SEB CHATTER)
-HECTOR: No.
-(GASPS)
-(UNSETTLING MUSIC)
-(ROSA GASPS)
No, this is really, really bad.
A broken mirror.
It's fine. It's nothing.
-Baby...
-Huh?
...it'll be fine.
You have a plane to catch.
Let's go.
ROSA: OK. Ciao.
HECTOR: Love you.
Bury it, OK?
-(HECTOR LAUGHS) OK.
-OK.
Just getting the family together
is a ritual
that's worth something.
Why are you talking like that?
I'm trying to sell you
on the Christmas cruise!
Oh! Cruise ships are
the worst kinds of boats.
Christmas is the worst
kind of cruise.
Edie!
"Travel is ethically
unjustifiable"
"until fully decarbonised."
That was you,
what, two years ago.
Yeah. Yes, I know.
And then I nearly died.
-And now I want...
-Jet lag?
Adventure!
(VIBRANT LATIN MUSIC)
Oh! (GIGGLES) Hola.
I didn't see you there.
I'm here to tell you about
the best country in the world.
Colombia!
In Colombia, we have
the best people, the best food,
the best coffee,
the best wildlife.
And we have the best
Christmas...
...when the most important thing
is time with family.
So I'm taking the whole family
on a Christmas cruise
in Colombia! (LAUGHS)
Bienvenidos.
(HISSES)
(PLAYFUL MUSIC)
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)
Gonna be great.
I am so excited!
Oh, whoa! What have you come as?
(AMERICAN ACCENT) If you can't
spot the sucker at the table,
then you are the sucker.
(REGULAR VOICE) Up for a role
in the new 'Ocean's Eleven'
spin-off.
Going method.
Oh!
Oh, thank God.
It's my baby Jesus.
He brings good luck.
ANGIE: Oh, cute.
No, be careful, he's fragile.
P.A. ANNOUNCEMENT:
Dominic Sam Chalmers,
this is your final
boarding call.
Dominic Sam Chalmers, please
proceed immediately to gate 47.
DOM: Excuse me.
SONG: Ooh-ah, ooh-ah
Ooh-ah-ooh
Here we go!
('TROPICAL SNOW'
BY MISS COLOMBIA)
(ANGELO CRIES)
Tropical snow
You've got the flow
Tropical snow
Ready to blow
Tropical snow
Is where I got off
I'm ready to party
I'm ready to glow
The sound of this jungle
The heat of the snow
The sweat of the colour
The vibe of the show
Tropical snow
You got the flow
Tropical snow
Hi, Ita.
Are you in Colombia now?
We're in Chile,
but at the airport.
We're going, we're on
our way to Colombia.
Colombia is full,
full of criminals.
Argentina has tango.
You should be going
to Argentina!
We're going to Colombia.
You know this.
Ready to blow
(ANGELO CRIES)
Ready to blow
No, I'm telling you, man
Colombia is far out, man
You go to the jungle
And it's snowing
Oh, man
Come on, hurry!
Latin American countries
are like a family.
Argentina.
Argentina is that cousin
that used to be rich
and then travelled
six months to Europe
and then came back
with a different accent
and thinks she's
better than everyone.
Ha!
(VIBRANT MUSIC)
Colombia is
the super-hot party girl
that used to be ugly as a kid
and everyone said mean things
but now she had a glow-up
and everyone wishes
they could marry her.
OK.
Colombia.
52 million people.
Two coastlines -
the Pacific and the Caribbean.
And also the Andes.
The most bio diverse country
in the world.
-(RECORD SCRATCHES)
-After Brazil.
That is an overrated country
just nearby.
There are no proper mountains.
So we are famous for...
REPORTER: Pablo Escobar,
criminal del cartel...
-(RECORD SCRATCHES)
-No, no, no, no, no, no.
No. That doesn't happen anymore.
(VIBRANT MUSIC)
And we're finally here! Ah!
-(BALL THUDS)
-Sorry.
(ROSA SPEAKS SPANISH)
Ah, yeah, well, they say
they're gonna keep looking.
SANTI: Guys, we're gonna
make our way to the boat.
ROSA: But no guarantee.
-DOM: Great.
-EDITH: Awesome.
ANGIE: Edie, you can borrow
my clothes.
EDITH: I'm not gonna fit
into your clothes, babe.
Why does this always happen
to me and Dom?
DOM: What am I supposed to wear?
Whose clothes am I
supposed to wear?
(QUIRKY MUSIC)
(BOTTLES CLINK)
Wait up!
(GASPS) Rosa!
(BOTH SQUEAL)
Everyone, everyone,
this is Ximena.
-Hola, Ximena!
-Hola!
-OK, Mira. Angie. Jacinda.
-Hola!
-Bowie, Oly, baby Angelo.
-Hola.
Wow!
You're so brave to travel
with a tiny baby.
(OLY LAUGHS) Yeah.
OK, my boys.
Gabe, Seb and Santi.
(XIMENA LAUGHS)
Ay, Santi. We can speak
in English. It's OK.
Oh.
Uh, hi, I'm Edith.
I'm Angie's partner.
-Oh. Hi.
-Yes, Edith.
And Dom.
Dom, Ximena. Ximena, Dom.
He's divorced like you.
Ah! Rosa.
Hi, Katrina.
Uh... Ximena.
Oh. You can't take that in.
Well, it's... the only
luggage I've got.
(CREW MEMBER
CLEARS THROAT LOUDLY)
What did she say?
Yeah, she just said,
"Don't fall overboard."
(CREW MEMBER
CONTINUES IN SPANISH)
I think she was... sobre la...
Dad, she's saying
follow the instructions...
(CREW MEMBER
CONTINUES IN SPANISH)
...and something about safety.
About alcohol?
(YAWNS) I don't know, Dad.
How'd you know that?
I've been listening
to your Duolingo for weeks.
It's actually not that
dissimilar to English.
Don't you think?
SANTI: Huh.
-Hurry up, bro.
-DOM: Wait, wait, wait.
-CREW MEMBER: Gracias.
-(BOTTLES CLINK)
Oh, wow.
CREW MEMBER:
(LAUGHS) Hi!
Hmm?
Yes, it's very hot.
I just had to take it off.
No, no, no.
No, but it's not...
I need to confiscate this,
please, seor.
Have to drink alcohol!
(PLAYFUL MUSIC)
(PLAYFUL MUSIC CONTINUES)
('SILENT NIGHT'
PLAYS OVER TANNOY)
BOWIE: Ooh, ooh, ooh.
(DOM SIGHS)
DOM: 10 days?
('SILENT NIGHT'
IN SPANISH PLAYS)
Look, we're VIPs.
Hey?
(MUTTERS) Tell that
to the cabin.
(STATIC CRACKLES AND HISSES)
(MUTTERS) 10 fucking days.
(TURNS VOLUME DOWN)
(ANGELO GURGLES)
JJ: Mum.
(SANTI SIGHS)
-Mum.
-OLY: Mmm?
Mum. Mum!
Can I sleep out on the top deck?
I wanna watch the ocean.
No, you can't sleep
on the deck, J.
Take your shoes off
and have a shower, please.
JJ: No way.
We've been in transit
for 40 hours.
Don't care.
You'll feel better.
JJ: No, I won't.
Um, hello? Little help?
SANTI:
Jay, have a shower, please.
OK, Papi.
SANTI: Thank you.
Ol, I don't think she's
forgiven you for having Jelly.
Hey! VIP drinks
with the captain.
(MUTTERS) I am so tired.
I feel amazing.
(SHOWER RUNS)
Do you know the amount
of energy it takes
to breastfeed a baby for one day
is like running 11 kilometres?
How would anyone measure that?
And being pregnant?
It's like having two rockmelons
and a watermelon
strapped to your torso.
I saw that challenge on TikTok.
While literally
all of your energy
is being diverted
to feeding a baby.
What's your point?
My point is if you wanna have
a 'who's the most exhausted'
competition,
you have no idea
who you're dealing with.
(PLAYFUL MUSIC)
Where are you going?
SANTI: I need some air.
Well, are you gonna
come to the drinks?
SANTI: Yep.
JJ: Mum, can I play Wordle
on your phone?
(DOOR BEEPS)
Oh, look at this! It's so sweet!
Ha-ha!
(SALSA-INFLECTED CHRISTMAS MUSIC
PLAYS OVER TANNOY)
(SIGHS)
Do you think they're
gonna turn that thing off?
ANGIE: The shower's cute.
Ooh! Tiny little Colombian soap!
-Oh!
-(LAUGHS)
Oh, the carpet! So fun!
(ANGIE LAUGHS)
Do you know where
I packed the Kwells?
ANGIE: Rosa said there were
over three weeks of
daily traditional gatherings
and beautiful rituals
here in Colombia at Christmas.
Jesus. How many?
(ANGIE LAUGHS)
It's so exuberant here.
The colour and the energy
and the music.
It's like they're grabbing life
by two hands. I love it!
(EDITH LAUGHS) Well...
...lucky I didn't pack this
in my suitcase.
-(ANGIE LAUGHS)
-(ZIPPER BUZZES)
What's so funny?
Oh. Oh, wow.
(BOTH LAUGH)
We're a lesbian trope.
No!
-(ROSA SQUEAKS)
-Mmm!
Ooh, very fancy, Rosa!
Oh!
ROSA: S.
Oy!
Oh, s.
-Ay, Rosa.
-(CHUCKLES)
You're going to have
a good time!
S, verdad?
('BAKANOA' BY BAKANOA PLAYS)
(PASSENGERS CHEER)
Yeah!
(BOTH CHEER)
Whoo!
Hey, hey, hey, hey,
hey, hey, hey, hey!
-BOTH: Bakanoa!
-(SONG ENDS)
(BOTH SQUEAL)
(BOTH SPEAK SPANISH)
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
-Buenas noches.
-Hola.
Ay! (LAUGHS)
We welcome you and your
many Australians on board.
ROSA: Yeah.
Thank you, um...
Thank you.
(SALSA MUSIC PLAYS)
(SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY)
Oh, hey, is this a bit of
a lesbian merge
that's happening here, perhaps?
OK.
ROSA: Hello, hello.
I made a family itinerary
for everyone.
-Oh, you made it.
-Oh, wow!
Wow, Colombian cooking classes!
ROSA: S!
Compulsory fun.
There's quite a lot of it.
A champeta class.
BOWIE: Yes, morning yoga.
I love that.
Expert lectures in
Colombian ecology.
Oh, my God! I'm gonna barely
have time to write.
Oh, is this your memoir?
Uh, yeah, it's, you know,
sort of memoir,
sort of autofiction.
30,000 words so far.
Oh, wow!
Could I read it?
Uh, well, really?
You've got Jacinda and Jelly
and surely you want
a break, don't you?
Oh, Mum, this will be my break.
Um, oh, well, it's...
It's, um...
-It's warts and all.
-Well, I love editing.
I edit at work all the time.
It's literally my job
and I'm really missing it.
Jelly's eight weeks old
and my brain is literally
turning to mush.
OK, well, yeah,
I'd appreciate some feedback.
OLY: Thank you.
Only good things.
Sure.
You know what
she's just been through.
And she's getting joy
out of this.
Says the woman complaining
about coming on this cruise.
Only good things.
Of course!
I said I would do that.
(ANGIE LAUGHS)
Ay!
(CALLS) Dom!
Dom.
-You look amazing.
-(LAUGHS) Thank you.
-Remember Ximena?
-I do.
Great to see you, Haa...
How are you?
It's Ximena.
Ximena.
-S.
-Yes.
I was telling her all about you.
Mmm! All good things, I hope.
Yes.
Um, do you like the boat?
DOM: Tried these?
$15, that is.
$15 a pop for
watered-down drinks -
which wouldn't
have been a problem
if I could have brought my own
duty-free alcohol on board.
XIMENA: Sure.
(ROSA CHUCKLES AWKWARDLY)
-Very funny.
-Here, try it.
-Yeah.
-I'm not wrong, am I?
ROSA: Hm.
It's fine. (LAUGHS)
Can you try it?
-I'm good. Thank you.
-Do you think I'm lying?
Um...
Here. Just drink from there.
Um... It's OK. It's OK.
-(LAUGHS) OK.
-DOM: Excuse me...
No, he's...
Let me try yours.
(CHUCKLES) 'Cause he's funny.
He's funny.
(XIMENA LAUGHS AWKWARDLY) Yeah.
That is rank.
(UPTEMPO MUSIC PLAYS)
Linea. Thank you.
Por favor, stay in your line.
Yeah. Thank you.
-Por favor...
-ANGIE: Is this normal?
(MUSIC ENDS)
(APPLAUSE)
(SUAVE MUSIC)
EDITH: So funny.
OLY: Wow!
Bienvenido. Bienvenido.
Bienvenido.
Bienvenido a bordo.
Bienvenido a bordo.
Bienvenido a bordo.
Bienvenido.
Bienvenidos. Bienvenidos.
Seorita!
(GIGGLES)
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
-Poker.
-Poker?
(CAPTAIN SPEAKS SPANISH)
(AMERICAN ACCENT)
You're good, kid.
But as long as I'm around,
you're second best.
Steve McQueen.
'Cincinnati Kid'.
Edward G. Robinson.
Oh, yeah. Charlie. I'm an actor.
Ay! Movies?
Oh, yeah. So many.
Uh, I recently... 'Star Wars'.
-(WHISPERS) 'Star Wars'.
-CAPTAIN: Oh!
For you, sir.
El Capitn would
like to invite you
to play poker this evening
in the officers' lounge.
BOWIE: Oh, I... OK, yeah.
I'm so touched.
Thank you. I appreciate it.
Thank you.
Well, I'm my son's usual
poker partner, so...
...might I join you also this
evening, captain, my captain?
(WHISPERS)
(WHISPERS IN SPANISH)
-No.
-No.
(SUAVE MUSIC ENDS)
(INSECTS CHIRP)
In Colombia, Christmas
starts on December 7th
with La Noche de las Velitas,
the night of the little candles.
And then, from nine days before,
we get together every night
to pray.
(RECITES IN SPANISH)
Well, I mean,
it's actually a party.
(PEOPLE SING IN SPANISH)
ROSA: Because we sing
and eat and drink
for nine nights, every night,
around the nativity scene.
Because the nativity scene
is a very big deal because...
Everybody does one.
And you can use
all the little figurines
that you have at the house,
like the little zoo animals
and dolls
and Marvel characters
and just anything.
This one...
...is a very special one.
From my abuela.
Amen
We don't believe in Santa.
He was invented by Coca-Cola.
See, you're telling me
a creepy old man in
the North Pole is watching you?
(CHILD SCREAMS)
Seeing if you're being
naughty or nice?
(CHILD SCREAMS)
No.
Baby Jesus from heaven.
He's the one watching you.
Alleluia!
And he brings the presents.
(PRAYS IN SPANISH)
(ALL PRAY IN SPANISH)
Amn.
Hola, seor.
-Perfecto.
-(DOM WHISTLES 'JINGLE BELLS')
Excuse me, sir.
(STOPS WHISTLING)
It's very bad luck
to whistle on a boat.
(PEOPLE SING IN SPANISH)
(RESUMES WHISTLING)
(PEOPLE SING IN SPANISH)
(SMOOTH MUSIC PLAYS)
(OLY LAUGHS)
(SANTI LAUGHS)
Ah! S, s.
To empathise. To empathise?
SANTI: OK.
(BOWIE IN AMERICAN ACCENT)
These guys.
(CAPTAIN ASKS QUESTION)
Eh? Oh, no. I don't drink.
Just...
(ALL CHATTER INDISTINCTLY)
(SUAVE MUSIC)
(BOWIE SPEAKS INAUDIBLY)
BOWIE: This is... this is
the real stuff.
Excuse me.
Is that my confiscated alcohol
you're drinking?
No, I think that's my alcohol.
-He's taken it.
-No passengers.
No passengers?
Well, he's a passenger.
No. Gracias.
DOM: Bowie!
-Hey. Fans. (LAUGHS)
-Ah!
Bowie!
(RELAXED MUSIC)
(SHIP'S HORN BLOWS)
(TANNOY CRACKLES)
(SIGHS)
(CRACKLING INTENSIFIES)
(PLAYFUL MUSIC)
Hey, Ha-he-ha...
XIMENA: Hey, Dom.
Ximena.
Are you going to Bar today?
Uh, I don't know. Maybe.
I mean, I haven't got
actually any clothes or...
Oh! Uh...
(SOFTLY) Could you translate
something for him, please?
He's got my alcoholic gin,
and I would like it back,
and also the speaker
in my room, above the bunk,
it's really loud,
so I think it's broken,
so if he could please fix that.
Thank you.
(SIGHS) No. He can't fix it.
Uh...
(VIBRANT MUSIC)
Come on! Hey!
Hey!
(ALL CONVERSE INDISTINCTLY)
(MUSIC ENDS)
(PASSIONATE GUITAR MUSIC)
Cover me in beso
Beso, beso, besitos
I want you to take me
Take me, take me to Mexico
With every kiss
You've got me tongue-tied
Every caress
You've got me upside down
Cover me in beso
Beso, beso, besitos
Excuse me, ma'am.
May I practise
my English with you?
Um... um... lessons.
How do you like Colombia?
Learning?
It's great.
And the beautiful baby?
His name?
Angelo.
-Angelo. It's a good name.
-Oh.
How age?
How old?
Um, eight weeks.
Almost nine.
See? You can teach me.
(BOTH LAUGH)
We are going to
serve lunch soon.
Is there anything you need?
Because I'd be very pleased
to help you with anything.
You seem good.
Your English, I mean.
(CHUCKLES) It's sounding...
-SANTI: Hi.
-Hey!
Uh...
No.
-Yes.
-SANTI: No.
We would like lunch.
-SANTI: Oh.
-Thank you.
SANTI: Oh.
Didn't love how that guy
was talking to my wife.
"My wife"?
Yeah!
Also known as me.
(HOLIDAY-MAKERS
SING AND CHATTER)
I got this for you.
(WAVES CRASH)
-Thanks.
-You're welcome.
Is there alcohol in this?
(LIGHT MUSIC)
(ROSA AND XIMENA LAUGH)
They're too small.
We were supposed to be in
Mr Alvarez's math class.
But we snuck out
to go to the shops.
(GASPS) We had to go
through the cemetery
to take a bus to the city
so we didn't get caught.
And when we got on the bus...
BOTH: There is Mr Perez!
(BOTH LAUGH)
No!
Oh. Yeah, that... that's cool.
-That's great.
-That's really cool.
-S? Cool?
-Yeah. Yeah, cool.
You know what? We were watching
the World Cup together.
Do you know what
these kids were doing?
Going for Australia?
-Exactly. Going for Australia.
-No!
So I asked them why.
And they said, "No, Mama,
it's because Colombia is lame."
-GABE: Mm-hm. Mm-hm.
-Uh-huh.
So I asked
the rest of the family,
"What do you know
about Colombia?"
And they say, "Colombia is poor,
Colombia is dangerous."
El cartel, las drogas...
(CONTINUES IN SPANISH)
So I bring them here
to show them, look!
Look how beautiful it is.
No, just...
ANGIE: My marriage was already
in a state of disintegration,
my career ambitions stagnating.
And then, without any warning,
a baby crashes into our lives.
Oh.
ANGIE: Thrust back into
the merciless servitude
and broken nights of early
parenthood, I was reeling,
doing everything I could to
ease the transition for Oly.
But the intractability
and the savagery
of teenage girls...
What?
...should never be
underestimated.
(ANGIE CALLS OUT) Hey!
Oh, hi.
ANGIE: How you going?
OLY: Good.
Oh, um, it's... it's great.
I didn't know it was
about me having J.
Well, it's taken me
a long time to acknowledge
what a fulcrum point
in my life that was.
OLY: Oh.
-I mean, yours, obviously...
-Obviously.
...but mine so much more
than I'd actually realised.
OLY: Mmm.
You don't have to read it.
I know it's gonna be hard
because sometimes,
'cause I have to be
really honest -
but that's just what I have to
do with this, to be honest.
Mum, I think it's great
that you're doing this.
Aw, thanks!
'Cause I've always wanted
to write a book.
(BOTH LAUGH)
But life just got
in the way and...
...you know, teaching
and kids and...
OLY: Grandkids.
Um, I just have
just one small note.
(UNEASY MUSIC)
Um, well, you know, I think
in memoir,
with the first-person
point of view
being so central
to the narrative, uh...
...and I know this is... this is
totally not your intention,
but it can be easy to sort of
inadvertently de-centre or...
or completely erase
the experiences of
other people around you.
I know, I know.
Yeah, I've been thinking
about that a lot,
especially being on this trip.
-Oh, you have? Oh, great.
-Mmm. Yeah.
I mean, you mean Rosa.
I contributed to
the break-up of her marriage,
and she's been so generous.
I assumed you dealt with that
a long time ago.
No! No, we just buried it
and just pretend
it never happened.
EDITH: Always works.
ANGIE: Yeah.
No time like the present.
I'm gonna talk to her.
Oh, Mum, are you sure
that's a good idea?
Yes.
-Yeah. It's time.
-(INSECT BUZZES)
Ow!
Is anyone else getting bitten
by these midgy things?
Everywhere!
Mm-mm.
-Itchy.
-Are you? No.
They're... in the sand
or something.
OLY: No.
(EDITH SIGHS) Oh, God.
Whoo!
(XIMENA LAUGHS)
You know I've been working on
a book since I had the cancer.
Oh, the cancer book, yes.
No, a big market for that.
No, seriously, because
everyone has cancer.
I don't know why someone
would like to read about it,
but, you know, people
seem to be interested in it.
-Can we... I just wanted to...
-What?
What is it?
I, um...
So I've been thinking a lot
about what I did.
With Matias.
When you were married to him.
ROSA: Uh-huh.
Facing mortality, it just
makes you weigh up your life,
and I just want to say that I am
terribly, terribly sorry.
Um, I know it happened
10 years ago,
and we've just never
really spoken about it,
and I just wanna say that
I really, really regret it.
Well...
...I just feel like you will
go to hell for that, Angie.
(LAUGHS) No!
You don't even believe in hell!
What do you care?
(BOTH LAUGH)
You know what?
Ay, in life, we have to move on,
and the two best decisions
I have ever made in my life
was moving to Australia
and leaving Matias.
-(SEB YELLS) Mum!
-(GABE YELLS) Mum!
Mum, I thought you said
you wanted to go snorkelling!
Or some shit!
What about having your kids?
No, I'm still wondering
about that one.
(BOTH LAUGH)
(LIGHT GUITAR MUSIC)
-ROSA: Ohh!
-ANGIE: Oh, my God.
(ROSA LAUGHS)
G'day.
How are ya?
GABE: Yeah.
Ah! I know that one.
-I know that. You like.
-S?
(BOTH LAUGH)
(SALSA MUSIC PLAYS FAINTLY)
(SALSA MUSIC CONTINUES)
(BOTH LAUGH)
ANGIE: Ahhh!
Whoo!
(BOTH WHOOP)
-Cheers.
-Salud.
DOM: Ugh!
Look at him, huh?
Sitting there like
a great big, corrupt,
kleptocratic dictator, huh?
(SUCKS LIME)
Been a few of them
in South America, right?
Maybe it's part of the culture.
Yes.
That's probably true, you know?
Just like in Australia
it's part of the culture
that everyone rides kangaroos
and is full of self-pity, no?
Gracias.
Edie, are you sure that
we should be encouraging
Mum's writing?
-Why not?
-Because it's not very good.
That's a matter of opinion.
Uh, no, it's...
That's fact in this case.
She's just beat cancer
for the second time.
I don't know if having cancer
makes anyone a better writer.
Only good things.
No, you're right.
(LAUGHS)
Enjoy the night.
(ANGIE SIGHS)
Ximena said that I am
"espiritualmente Colombiana".
-Yay!
-Wow.
I'm so glad you pushed me
to speaking to Rosa, darling.
-Oh, that's good.
-Mmm.
And it has made me realise that
facing the hard things in life
is actually the only way
to let them go.
Wow.
You face those hard things, Mum.
Go deep.
I know you're being sarcastic,
but it's true.
Hey, Angie, think
you're ready for bed?
(ROSA LAUGHS)
Bed? (LAUGHS)
No, no-one is going to bed.
It's 10:30.
Don't be silly. (LAUGHS) Vamos!
(DOM SIGHS)
(MUTTERS) Shit.
Ay! (CONTINUES IN SPANISH)
I don't know what that means.
(MYSTERIOUS MUSIC)
It's very bad luck.
(SNAPS FINGERS)
(SALSA MUSIC ENDS)
('EL PODER DE MIS PECADOS'
BY ANTONIO SAVIA)
(USNAVY WHISPERS SENSUOUSLY)
('EL PODER DE MIS PECADOS'
BY ANTONIO SAVIA CONTINUES)
(SONG FADES)
JJ: Mum.
-Jesus.
-I feel seasick.
-Oh, OK, do you want...
-(VOMITS)
SANTI: What?
God.
(OLY WHISPERS)
Where's the Hydralyte?
(WHISPERS) It's in
the toiletry bag.
(OLY WHISPERS) It's not.
You said you packed it.
-I did pack it.
-Well, it's not in here.
OK, well, how about
you have a look?
(ANGELO CRIES)
(SIGHS) For fuck's sake.
JJ: Mum, you're supposed
to be helping me. I need you.
Remind me, which part of
this trip was the good idea?
(ANGELO CONTINUES CRYING)
What do you mean?
I don't know why you pushed
for this so hard, Oly.
It is insane to come overseas
with an 8-week-old baby.
-I did this for you!
-OK.
Well, don't do me
any favours, Ol.
Oh.
The Hydralyte's right here.
(ANGELO CRIES)
(SHIP'S HORN BLOWS)
(TREADMILL BEEPS)
(TREADMILL BEEPS REPEATEDLY)
(TREADMILL BEEPS ONCE)
(TREADMILL BEEPS REPEATEDLY)
('THE BREATH' BY FLORENT SABATON
AND SEBASTIEN LUNGHI)
(TREADMILL BEEPS REPEATEDLY)
(TREADMILL BEEPS REPEATEDLY)
(SANTI GRUNTS)
(USNAVY GROANS)
You win, amigo!
(THUD!)
(TANNOY CHIMES)
(CAPTAIN SPEAKS SPANISH)
Ah!
(TANNOY CRACKLES)
(DOM GROANS)
BOWIE: Why don't... Why don't
you just baffle it, Dad?
Yeah?
(LIVELY LATIN MUSIC)
Cartagena is one of the oldest
and most important ports
of the Caribbean.
It's famous for architecture
from the 16th, 17th
and 18th centuries,
and inspired Gabo's novel
'Love in the Time of Cholera'.
And the palenqueras
are icons of the city.
They are descendants from
the Afro-Colombians
that escaped Spanish
slavery in the 1600s.
And it is very, very beautiful.
Ay, you're gonna love it.
(RECORD SCRATCHES)
(GLASS SMASHES)
(BOTH LAUGH)
(LIVELY LATIN MUSIC CONTINUES)
ANGIE: Oh, mamacita!
(LAUGHS)
Ah!
(LIVELY LATIN MUSIC CONTINUES)
-(SPEAKS SPANISH)
-Yeah!
(LIVELY LATIN MUSIC CONTINUES)
(PEOPLE TRILL AND WHOOP)
(LIVELY LATIN MUSIC CONTINUES)
(BOTH SPEAK INAUDIBLY)
ANGIE: Sex with him was
frantic, addictive, chaotic.
The double betrayal
heightened it.
Yet it was with her
that I finally came home.
I found
the five-dimensional domain
of everything
that I'd been missing,
everything I needed.
Transcendence,
the softness of her skin,
the taste of her...
Ooh!
My God!
(INDISTINCT CHATTER NEARBY)
-(ANGIE LAUGHS)
-ROSA: Remember that?
-Yes.
-ROSA: That was so funny.
-Hey, darling.
-Hello, hello!
ROSA: Hola, hola.
ANGIE: Ah!
Oh, wow.
-Oh, Edie! Where have you been?
-Hey!
-What happened?
-EDIE: I got lost.
ANGIE: Ohh!
-I found her in Getsemani.
-Oh.
-It was a dodgy cab driver.
-Oh.
Oh, God, I need a drink.
OK. Drinks.
ANGIE: Oh.
(SIGHS)
Well?
ROSA: Gracias.
ANGIE: Oh!
(OLY GULPS)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Don't be such a prude!
You're my editor.
Oh, no. Not... not for this one.
Why not?
Mum! (CHUCKLES)
Are you trolling me? (CHUCKLES)
The... the sex stuff.
With... Santi's Dad.
And Edie.
Well, you inspired it.
-OLY: What?
-"Go deep. Face the hard thing."
Mum, we established
that I was being sarcastic.
Look, I... I...
I didn't realise
how much self-loathing
I was carrying around
about Matias.
And Rosa's forgiveness
has helped me,
just made me want to face it
full-frontal.
Well, it's that.
Oh, my God.
Oly, I am just trying
to be, honestly, to...
Just trying to speak your truth.
Yeah, I mean, that sounds
a little bit clichd,
but, like, yeah, I am.
I'm trying to bridge the gap
between expression
and, uh, experience.
Well, it's...
It's, uh... it's vibrant.
Yes. Yeah.
Life, sex, desire,
the whole mess.
I'm just trying to convey
how it feels to be alive.
God, I could be the next
Helen-Garner-cum-Erica-Jong.
Oh, Mum, please don't say 'cum'.
Hey, where's Santi?
Oh, he, um,
wanted to keep going,
but I was tired, so we split.
-Oh, is everything alright?
-It's fine.
ANGIE: Hmm.
-Gracias.
-ANGIE: To Rosa!
For bringing us to
this beautiful,
magical dream of a country.
Salud!
-(ANGIE SPEAKS SPANISH)
-ROSA: Gracias.
ROSA: Oh, stop it!
-(ANGIE SPEAKS SPANISH)
-Keep going.
(BOTH LAUGH)
EDIE: Just gonna go
and get a beer.
-ANGIE: Oh, have mine.
-No, no, I'll get my own one.
-Oh, Edie!
-Oh, you wanted one?
-No, no, it's good.
-It's so cold and delicious.
-I'm sorry.
-Mm!
(ANIMATED REED FLUTE
AND PERCUSSION MUSIC)
Yeah, that's amazing.
What I really need is,
um, sticky tape, uh...
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
No, like, um, electrical tape?
-MAN: Uh...
-(IMITATES RIPPING)
Oh, my God, Dum-Dum.
Give me your phone.
DOM: Uh, glue.
Some sort of adhesive?
(SPANISH TRANSLATION
ON PHONE APP)
DOM: Gracias.
Well done.
(ANIMATED REED FLUTE
AND PERCUSSION MUSIC)
(CAPTAIN SPEAKS SPANISH
OVER TANNOY)
(CAPTAIN CONTINUES OVER TANNOY)
(TANNOY SPEECH BECOMES MUFFLED)
(SIGHS)
(ANGIE RECITES IN SPANISH
OVER TANNOY)
More novenas.
It's only the sixth night.
How many are there again?
Nine.
Fuck me, it's never gonna end.
(RECITES IN SPANISH)
And what the hell's Angie doing?
When in Colombia...
How's that?
(CHUCKLES) It's great.
This one's about how I was
an ungrateful sociopath
of a teenager
who ruined my mother's life.
This is the best bit.
It says I came out of
the womb bossy.
I'm sure it doesn't say that.
(PASSENGERS SING IN SPANISH)
(LIVELY SPANISH MUSIC PLAYS)
Yeah.
(PASSENGERS SING ALONG)
(SANTI SIGHS)
OLY: What happened?
I hurt my shoulder.
Doing what?
(USNAVY SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY)
Oh, come on.
What?
Mama, I'm talking to Lilliana.
I don't want to do
this dumb lame shit, Mum.
(CRUNCHY GUITAR ROCK)
Sometimes nothing
is a cool card.
-(CAPTAIN LAUGHS)
-(WHISPERS) Oh, fuck.
(CHIPS CLINK)
(QUIRKY MUSIC)
(QUIRKY MUSIC FADES)
(SOFTLY) You're a dead man.
(SURF ROCK MUSIC)
(SURF ROCK MUSIC CONTINUES)
(SURF ROCK MUSIC CONTINUES)
(MOUTHS WORDS)
(SURF ROCK MUSIC FADES)
(SHIP'S HORN BLOWS)
(ROSA LAUGHS)
Mm. Mm.
(XIMENA GASPS)
ROSA: S!
-(XIMENA LAUGHS)
-(GASPS)
(MYSTICAL FLUTE MUSIC)
(GABE AND SEB
CHATTER INDISTINCTLY)
-No way, bro.
-No way.
What are you guys laughing at?
(LASER BEAMS ZAP)
In my day, it was all
'Call of Duty' and Skrillex.
-'CoD' still slaps. Yeah.
-Hey!
I told you, three things.
The first one, it was
the breaking of the mirror,
and I couldn't bury it.
And then Dom spilling the salt.
Second one.
Third one, the baby Jesus gone.
Bad things come in three.
That's... that's three.
So that means the bad thing's
already happened, yeah?
No, no. It means...
Oh, Angie, It means that
a bad thing is going to happen.
That's what it means.
It's going to happen.
ANGIE: Mm. Oh, I'm sure
he'll turn up.
And then... then the bad luck
will be reversed.
ROSA: No, I don't think
it works that way.
ANGIE: OK.
Are the boys gonna come tonight?
No.
Gabe is having girl problems
and...
I just...
(SIGHS) I just thought
they would love it here.
-Yeah, teenagers. Arggh!
-Yeah, but I...
I wanted to show
the whole family, you know,
where I was born
and... and where I grew up.
You know, what I miss.
And my boys cannot even...
They cannot even try
to have fun with me.
I don't...
Why they can't just love
what I love?
Very simple.
Hmm, it seems like Gabe's
having a good time.
Yeah, he's having a great time.
Going to get an STI
if he hasn't already.
And now we have a...
Well, we have a cursed cruise.
ANGIE: Hmm.
A cursed...
A cursed cruise!
Yeah.
(EDIE VOMITS)
ANGIE: Mm.
(EDIE COUGHS)
Ohh.
Ugh.
(ANGIE EXHALES)
Probably that crab at Bar.
Mm, but I had that too.
The ice in the drinks
at the old town.
Mm, no, Rosa only took us
to the best places.
I don't think it would be that.
Oh, fucking yay for Rosa.
What's that supposed to mean?
Oh, you just...
You're just talking about her
all the time.
And having so much fun with her
and praying with her.
What the fuck was that?
I mean, we're atheists.
(LAUGHS) When in Colombia...
Edie, I know you're not jealous
of Rosa.
EDIE: Of course I am.
I'm jealous of sharing you
with anyone.
-What?!
-With everyone. I...
I just want whatever time
we have left to be ours.
ANGIE: Mm.
We're gonna have the rest
of our lives together.
What if we don't?
Oh, don't be ridiculous.
Do you want me to stay on board
with you tonight?
No, no, no, no. No.
It's the Christmas lights, which
is a huge deal, apparently.
(SCOFFS)
-(MOANS)
-OK.
-Oh, I'm gonna be sick again.
-Ohhh!
-(EDIE VOMITS)
-(ANGIE MOANS SYMPATHETICALLY)
(SPANISH GUITAR MUSIC)
-Drugs are a fun time.
-Drugs are a really fun...
-So there's 50,000.
I actually got a second baggie
if that's of any interest.
That's so great. I have 6,000.
I'll take it. Have the drugs,
have a fun time.
You know,
I'm not full of self-pity.
-At all.
-Sure.
Well, you don't know me, so...
Most people I know
think that I'm, um...
Maybe it's the language barrier.
But you speak perfect...
Very funny.
(BOTH LAUGH)
Isn't this weird?
Your wife left you
for your sister,
and you're just fine with it.
You go on holidays with them
and your kids.
Well, she didn't leave me
for her, so...
Why would I indulge my anger...
...if it means I lose
two people I love?
(AIRY GUITAR MUSIC)
(AIRY GUITAR MUSIC CONTINUES)
(CAMERA CLICKS)
Ah!
(CAMERA CLICKS)
Oh, look! Oh!
(BOWIE SPEAKS SPANISH)
XIMENA: Take Legui,
Forajida, Los Maricas...
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
-I don't speak...
-(SPEAKS SPANISH)
Uh, Los...
You know, I will make you
a playlist.
Oh, that is awesome!
Um, should we go to
the Christmas lights?
-Yeah.
-Yeah!
BOWIE: Yeah,
that's a great idea.
You know, I'm going to
go back to the ship
to look for Nio Jesus.
-ANGIE: Oh, really?
-Yeah, I'm a little bit worried.
But you guys go. Have fun.
-ANGIE: Cool.
-ROSA: Go.
I'm gonna go off on my own.
Um, we might actually stay
and keep chatting, if that's...
Yeah, sure.
I would like another drink.
(DOM LAUGHS)
You'd probably like to hear
about some Australian music?
Sure!
Well, um, in 1996, uh,
a band by the name of
Magic Dirt, uh, left Geelong...
(LANGUID PERCUSSIVE MUSIC)
(LANGUID PERCUSSIVE MUSIC
CONTINUES)
(LANGUID PERCUSSIVE MUSIC
CONTINUES)
(MUSIC FADES)
-(GUITAR MUSIC PLAYS NEARBY)
-It's, like, really painful.
I have torn ligaments.
Well, maybe don't do dumb stuff.
Maybe don't flirt
with sailor boy.
(OLY SIGHS)
-I was feeding Jelly.
-And?
What do you want me to do,
run away?
Oly, you were enjoying it.
You've been enjoying it.
Yeah!
Yeah.
Maybe.
I had a baby eight weeks ago.
(SANTI EXHALES)
Santi, his accent
is like a magic spell.
Oly...
Can you not see that it's, like,
it's weird for me being here?
I'm from Chile.
My parents are Chilean.
You and Bowie speak
better Spanish than I do,
and then you're swooning
over Usnavy.
Yeah, I didn't think about that.
I remember my mum speaking
Spanish to me when I was little.
I wish I could
understand it better.
I think what's gonna happen
is that one day it'll just...
it'll just click into place
and you'll just be
speaking fluently.
And the more you practise,
the sooner that will be.
-That's classic Oly advice.
-It's true.
Hey, I'm really sorry.
I'm sorry
that I didn't understand
what this trip meant for you.
(BELL TOLLS)
('AVE MARIA' BY BACH/GOUNOD)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
CHOIR: Gratia plena
Dominus
Tecum
Benedicta
Tu
In mulieribus
Et benedictus
Fructus
Ventris
Tui, Jesus
Sancta Maria
-Sancta...
-(INTENSE ORGAN CHORDS)
Maria...
(TING!)
Maria...
No, no, no, it's just...
It's just the shrooms.
It's just the shrooms.
(SIGHS)
Amen
Amen
Yes? Mm.
(LAIDBACK SPANISH MUSIC)
(LAIDBACK SPANISH MUSIC
CONTINUES)
(LAIDBACK SPANISH MUSIC
CONTINUES)
(TANNOY CHIMES)
(OFFICER SPEAKS SPANISH)
(ANGIE LAUGHS AND CHATTERS)
(FESTIVE SPANISH MUSIC
PLAYS SOFTLY)
(CLEARS THROAT)
Morning.
OLY: Hi.
(SIGHS)
All OK?
Yeah.
Which bit are you up to?
You know it wasn't easy. For me.
And this is reading like
I was some sort of spoilt kid
having a tantrum
because I didn't get
what I wanted for Christmas.
And now I'm reading that Bowie
was your easy child...
...and that
"His perfect birth augured"
"his joyfully offbeat
childhood."
And you call yourself
a feminist.
You weren't worried about
de-centring Rosa?
Not especially.
OK. Well, you should read
what I've written this week.
It's gonna be my final chapter.
You know what, Mum?
I think I've read enough.
Oly, this is...
Hello!
-JJ: It's Navidad!
-It is Navidad!
-Oly, it's...
-It's Navidad.
-ANGIE: Mm-hm.
-Should we get some brekkie?
-Hi, darling. Good morning.
-OLY: Get a plate.
Wow.
-SANTI: All good?
-Yeah. Just fantastic.
(WHISPERS)
(FESTIVE SPANISH MUSIC
PLAYS FAINTLY)
(CAPTAIN MUTTERS INDISTINCTLY)
(SIGHS)
Just...
(CLEARS THROAT)
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
This is your captain
speaking here from the bridge.
(CONTINUES IN SPANISH)
(MUFFLED ANNOUNCEMENCONTINUES OVER TANNOY)
-Buenos das.
-Buenos das.
(CHUCKLES) It sounds a lot
better when you say it.
(BOTH LAUGH)
(MUFFLED ANNOUNCEMENCONTINUES OVER TANNOY)
(ADHESIVE TAPE RIPS)
ANGUS: Oh!
XIMENA: Oh!
(ANNOUNCEMENT CONTINUES LOUDLY
OVER TANNOY)
Oh!
-You alright?
-Uh-uh.
I'm so sorry.
XIMENA: Oh!
DOM: The hell?
You made that to stop
the captain's voice?
-DOM: S.
-Ohh.
That is it. I have had enough!
Bien? Contenta?
Perfecto.
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
(ROSA SPEAKS SPANISH)
Bowie?
Um...
DIEGO: De nada.
(DOOR OPENS)
(DOOR CLOSES)
Bowie!
(DETERMINED MUSIC)
Rosa!
Hey, guys, this, uh,
is my Australian friend.
Seorita.
-Buenas.
-Buenas.
ROSA: Hmm.
Thank you for the
beautiful earrings, Bowie.
-Oh, hey, hey, it's no problem.
-ROSA: Mm.
Very expensive?
S, esmeraldas Colombiana.
ROSA: Oh!
Why are you winning
so much money, Bowie?
-(WHISPERS) I'm lucky, OK?
-Oh.
I was blessed
by the Nio Jesus in Cartagena.
Hm. How lucky!
-I know.
-Yes! (GIGGLES)
-What do you have in your hand?
-Nothing.
-Let me see.
-Nothing!
Which 'Star Wars' movie
did you say you were in?
-BOWIE: Uh, uh...
-Bowie!
One of the newer ones, actually.
It was a deleted scene.
-I-I might, uh...
-Bowie.
BOWIE: I'm gonna head out.
-(ROSA SPEAKS SPANISH)
-S.
Bowie!
Where's Captain Fuckface?
DIEGO: No lo s, seor.
ROSA: Bowie? Bowie!
-What?
-Bowie! Bowie!
BOWIE: What?!
Well, well, well,
El Capi-wanker.
You stole my gin.
You won't let me play poker.
I have not been able to sleep
in the world's smallest cabin
because you will not shut up
on a tinny tannoy
that you refuse to fix.
And now you have hurt my Ximena.
Oh, stupido Australiano, huh?
I think I know what that means.
Well, I don't know
what you're saying.
I'm saying go back.
-You go back.
-No, you go back.
ROSA: Bowie! Bowie.
-Bowie.
-What?
-What's in your hand?
-This hand?
No, the other hand.
Give me my glass!
Give it to me, you...
Bowie!
Ohh!
I swear I was gonna
give it back.
I was just doing really well.
(FIGURINE CLINKS)
Oh! No, no, no!
(CRIES)
(SHIP CREAKS AND RUMBLES)
(SHIP CREAKS AND THUDS)
-(GLASS BREAKS)
-Oh!
-That can't be good.
-(ALARM BLARES)
CREW MEMBER:
CAPTAIN: Ah!
(CAPTAIN SPEAKS SPANISH
OVER TANNOY)
I'll call you back, Sharon.
CAPTAIN:
Oh, we are fucked.
(YELLS INDISTINCTLY)
(SCREAMS)
(CAPTAIN SIGHS)
(GASPS)
You!
-Rosa...
-You!
You cursed us!
(AIR HISSES)
1350
(SANTI CHUCKLES AWKWARDLY)
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
S, s, s.
I was going to...
-About your... your drawing.
-Ah, yeah, Mira, Mira.
ANGIE: So much money!
SANTI: We could do another trip
to Colombia with this money.
-ANGIE: Merry Christmas!
-(BOYS EXCLAIM)
Edie, this one's for you.
Sorry, I asked him
to engrave a heart on it,
but he put it on Dom's. (LAUGHS)
Bowie. Where's Bowie?
Oh, he's sulking.
He didn't get the role.
-Aw!
-DOM: Ho, ho, ho!
-JJ: Dum-Dum!
-(SANTI LAUGHS)
Merry Christmas!
Ay, Dom... How many times?
We don't do Santa, Dom.
I bought it in Carta-henya.
No, Cartagena.
And then the ones
that bring the presents
is El Nio Dios in Navidad.
-But he's gone.
-DOM: Sorry.
I was trying to lighten
the bloody mood.
ANGIE: Oh, there's a present
for you, Dom.
You know, I asked Usnavy,
El Capitn,
almost everyone on the crew.
Who knows how long
it'll take to fix?
About the ship?
Oh, I'm sorry, Rosa.
Maybe they'll get it fixed
in time and we can keep going.
Are we moving? We're not moving.
(DOM YAWNS)
(RHYTHMIC CLICKING)
OK, come on!
It's Navidad.
Let's play a game.
No.
A Christmas game?
OLY: It's a team-building
workshop I did at council.
(QUIRKY MUSIC)
What skill would you bring
to the apocalypse?
-SANTI: Oh!
-Ay, no.
-It's a bit depressing.
-OLY: It's fun. It's fun.
'Cause we all have to work
together to survive.
So how are we gonna do that?
Because there's no internet.
Who's gonna grow our food
or who's gonna handle
the weapons or repair machinery?
I could ferment.
I can make pickles.
Oh, and I did read
a really good article
about how to build
a root cellar.
So I could do that.
-Mum's in the bunker.
-ANGIE: Yay, I'm safe.
DOM: I could make home brew
and, um... and bathtub gin.
We could do that together.
-Dad's in the bunker.
-(DOM LAUGHS)
-We'll all be drunk.
-SANTI: I know what I can do.
-OLY: Yes?
-I can make fires.
-And run security.
-Yes, you can.
OK, I can do first aid.
Actually, I'm really good
at, um, offline navigation.
ROSA: Great!
And then Bowie can bring
stealing and gambling
and blasphemy
to the apocalipsis.
Uh, I've just spoken to
the captain.
Uh, ship's fucked.
We're not going to San Andres.
(SOBS)
Make-up!
Can I have make-up?
(WHIMPERS)
(PERCUSSIVE MUSIC)
ANGIE: I found that
much-anticipated events
often collapse under the weight
of their own expectation,
which is why I've always
preferred surprises
in which, lucky me,
my life has been rich.
(GENTLE GUITAR MUSIC)
I love you.
Aw.
-Oh.
-Yes.
-Hello.
-(MURMURS TEASINGLY)
(LAUGHS)
-(PAGES FLUTTER)
-(BOTH CHUCKLE)
(CAPRICIOUS MUSIC)
Angie.
Angie, the paper!
-Oh.
-Look!
Oh!
Oh, no! I just dropped
the ones I'm picking up!
EDITH: I can't believe this.
(CAPRICIOUS MUSIC)
ANGIE: Arggh!
You're joking!
BOTH: Oh!
(PENSIVE MUSIC)
EDITH: Here.
-I'm so...
-How?
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
-Yeah.
-In a dream.
(SHIP RUMBLES)
(SHIP'S HORN BLOWS)
-What?
-(TANNOY CHIMES)
CAPTAIN:
-(SANTI GASPS)
-(ROSA SQUEALS)
No way!
-It's good, right?
-Yeah, sure.
(UPBEAT LATIN MUSIC)
(ANNOUNCEMENT IN SPANISH
OVER TANNOY)
(UPBEAT LATIN MUSIC CONTINUES)
(ANGIE CRIES)
It's all gone!
I know. I'm so sorry.
All that effort.
Just wasted.
It's not wasted!
Mum, you wrote a beautiful,
brutally honest account
of your life.
Maybe it's for the best.
(MYSTICAL PERCUSSION)
You're happy it's gone.
I'm not happy it's gone.
You didn't want an honest,
unfiltered version
of how hard it was,
and how hard you were
out in the world.
Well, maybe I'm not devastated.
But what I mean is
a lot of great authors
talk about how they make a few
attempts before they nail it.
You just have to
pick yourself up
and you have to write
another book.
(SOBS) Pick myself up again?
I can't keep picking myself up.
(SOBS DRAMATICALLY)
I don't think I will.
(SOBS DRAMATICALLY)
TANNOY: Flight number 575
to Sydney via Santiago
boarding at gate 25.
OK. Well, Mum, maybe next time
just get a laptop.
(AIRY GUITAR MUSIC)
(AIRY GUITAR MUSIC CONTINUES)
(AIRY GUITAR MUSIC CONTINUES)
(AIRY GUITAR MUSIC CONTINUES)
(AIRY GUITAR MUSIC CONTINUES)
(AIRY GUITAR MUSIC CONTINUES)
(AIRY GUITAR MUSIC FADES)
(DISTANT SIREN WAILS)
(DOG BARKS)
Come on, amor.
Why don't we just get
a bottle of champagne,
celebrate together?
It's New Year's Eve.
No, no, no, thank you.
I... I just want
to go early to bed
and then wake up in a new year.
-Shh! Shh!
-(ANGIE CHUCKLES)
And what about
all the traditions?
No, no, it doesn't matter.
I don't want to do anything.
-Nothing?
-No!
-Anything?
-No.
Nothing, not even this?
-Surprise!
-(ALL CHEER)
(LAUGHS)
You did this for me?
SEB: Yeah, Mama.
-(ANGIE LAUGHS)
-OK, todos.
Ao nuevo,
Colombiano,
aqui vamos!
(ALL CHEER)
I'm in love in the city
I'm in love
In the city of sound
I'm in love
It's kind of pretty
I'm in love
In the city of sound
In the sound, in the sound
In the sound...
Ao nuevo, New Year's Eve,
you have to run around your
neighbourhood with a suitcase,
with all the people
that you love,
so you can travel a lot
next year.
I'm in love in the city
I'm in love
In the city of sound...
(ALL WHOOP AND LAUGH)
I'm in love
It's kind of pretty
I'm in love
In the city of sound
In the sound, in the sound
In the sound
In the sound, in the sound
The city of sound
In the sound, in the sound
In the sound
In the sound, in the sound
(ALL LAUGH AND CHEER)
Ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh
Ooh-ooh-ooh
Ooh-ooh-ooh...
-Vamos!
-Ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh
Ooh-ooh-ooh
Ooh-ooh-oooh
And when the clock
hits midnight,
you have to eat 12 grapes,
one for every month of the year,
and then you have to make
12 wishes.
(ANGELO BURBLES)
(QUIET CHATTER NEARBY)
Grangie, can I take Jelly?
Yes, of course you can. (LAUGHS)
JACINDA: Oh, hello.
ANGIE: Aw!
(CRICKETS CHIRP)
What did your final chapter say?
What?
The whole thing?
OK, I think I remember
the best bits.
It said...
...I learned that parenthood
is never finished.
I learned that families
can survive
astonishing ruptures.
I learned that love
is all that counts.
I learned that my daughter...
...is the strongest person
I know,
and she gave me something
as beautiful and as miraculous
as another childhood.
-OK, weirdo.
-(LAUGHS)
(ANGIE CHUCKLES)
Yeah, I'm much better now. Much.
Que es? (GASPS)
And then we burn
a big ao viejo doll
that is full of fireworks
so we can say goodbye
to all the bad things
that happened that year
and make way
for a beautiful new beginning.
('COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS'
BY MATTIEL)
Cheers.
Ahhh!
Everybody,
it's close to midnight!
-SANTI: Oh, whoa, whoa!
-OK, here we go! Here we go!
ALL: 10, 9, 8, 7...
(SANTI COUNTS IN SPANISH)
...tres, dos, uno!
Your shoes keep turning
Different shades of blue
The colours
Of the other fools before you
And skin keeps turning
Different shades of red
The colours
Of the other voice
That's swimming in your head
Make yourself at home again
Count your blessings
One to 10
Your body will be
Whole again
Your body
Will be whole again
Make yourself at home again
Count your blessings
One to 10
La-la-la-la-la
La-la, la-la-la-la-la
And make yourself
At home again
Count your blessings
One to 10
La-la-la-la-la...
Whoo!
La-la-la-la-la
La-la, la-la-la-la-la
(MYSTICAL PERCUSSION)
(WHIMSICAL MUSIC)
(CHURCH ORGAN PLAYS
'HARK! THE HERALD ANGELS SING')
(CRACK!)
ANGIE: I know exactly
how you feel about Christmas.
It's work.
It's stressful.
There's so much plastic
and so much waste.
The kids get too much junk.
The music's terrible.
The expectations are crushing.
The forced cheer
is self-defeating.
And the family is exhausted,
which is exactly why, this year,
I think we should do
something different.
(CHURCH ORGAN SLOWS
AND DISTORTS)
(BELLS RING DISCORDANTLY)
(SANTI SPEAKS SPANISH)
OLY: Don't even know
if we need all of this stuff.
But it's the Jelly stuff and...
(WHISPERS)
...it's the Santa stuff.
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
I packed for several
climate zones
because it's tropical but
it gets cold in the mountains.
I don't even wanna
do the Santa thing.
-We're gaslighting J.
-(DUOLINGO CHIMES)
The imperative to consume
is insane
and the whole concept erases
mothers who do all of the work.
And gives all the credit
to Santa.
Mum! Mum!
Why does Angelo have to come?
Darling, if 16-year-old me
can go straight back to school
with a newborn,
I'm pretty sure I can handle
a holiday with a baby.
SANTI:
Ay, boys! Hurry up!
(PLANE ROARS OVERHEAD)
(CAR DOOR SLAMS)
Tough life chose me.
A big holiday in Colombia!
GABE: We went
when I was little, Mum.
It was kind of lame.
Food sucked
and I got sick, so...
ROSA: Oh, my God.
Well, this time you're
gonna love Colombia.
And everything's gonna
be perfect. Now let's go.
(GLASS SMASHES)
(GABE AND SEB CHATTER)
-HECTOR: No.
-(GASPS)
-(UNSETTLING MUSIC)
-(ROSA GASPS)
No, this is really, really bad.
A broken mirror.
It's fine. It's nothing.
-Baby...
-Huh?
...it'll be fine.
You have a plane to catch.
Let's go.
ROSA: OK. Ciao.
HECTOR: Love you.
Bury it, OK?
-(HECTOR LAUGHS) OK.
-OK.
Just getting the family together
is a ritual
that's worth something.
Why are you talking like that?
I'm trying to sell you
on the Christmas cruise!
Oh! Cruise ships are
the worst kinds of boats.
Christmas is the worst
kind of cruise.
Edie!
"Travel is ethically
unjustifiable"
"until fully decarbonised."
That was you,
what, two years ago.
Yeah. Yes, I know.
And then I nearly died.
-And now I want...
-Jet lag?
Adventure!
(VIBRANT LATIN MUSIC)
Oh! (GIGGLES) Hola.
I didn't see you there.
I'm here to tell you about
the best country in the world.
Colombia!
In Colombia, we have
the best people, the best food,
the best coffee,
the best wildlife.
And we have the best
Christmas...
...when the most important thing
is time with family.
So I'm taking the whole family
on a Christmas cruise
in Colombia! (LAUGHS)
Bienvenidos.
(HISSES)
(PLAYFUL MUSIC)
(INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS)
Gonna be great.
I am so excited!
Oh, whoa! What have you come as?
(AMERICAN ACCENT) If you can't
spot the sucker at the table,
then you are the sucker.
(REGULAR VOICE) Up for a role
in the new 'Ocean's Eleven'
spin-off.
Going method.
Oh!
Oh, thank God.
It's my baby Jesus.
He brings good luck.
ANGIE: Oh, cute.
No, be careful, he's fragile.
P.A. ANNOUNCEMENT:
Dominic Sam Chalmers,
this is your final
boarding call.
Dominic Sam Chalmers, please
proceed immediately to gate 47.
DOM: Excuse me.
SONG: Ooh-ah, ooh-ah
Ooh-ah-ooh
Here we go!
('TROPICAL SNOW'
BY MISS COLOMBIA)
(ANGELO CRIES)
Tropical snow
You've got the flow
Tropical snow
Ready to blow
Tropical snow
Is where I got off
I'm ready to party
I'm ready to glow
The sound of this jungle
The heat of the snow
The sweat of the colour
The vibe of the show
Tropical snow
You got the flow
Tropical snow
Hi, Ita.
Are you in Colombia now?
We're in Chile,
but at the airport.
We're going, we're on
our way to Colombia.
Colombia is full,
full of criminals.
Argentina has tango.
You should be going
to Argentina!
We're going to Colombia.
You know this.
Ready to blow
(ANGELO CRIES)
Ready to blow
No, I'm telling you, man
Colombia is far out, man
You go to the jungle
And it's snowing
Oh, man
Come on, hurry!
Latin American countries
are like a family.
Argentina.
Argentina is that cousin
that used to be rich
and then travelled
six months to Europe
and then came back
with a different accent
and thinks she's
better than everyone.
Ha!
(VIBRANT MUSIC)
Colombia is
the super-hot party girl
that used to be ugly as a kid
and everyone said mean things
but now she had a glow-up
and everyone wishes
they could marry her.
OK.
Colombia.
52 million people.
Two coastlines -
the Pacific and the Caribbean.
And also the Andes.
The most bio diverse country
in the world.
-(RECORD SCRATCHES)
-After Brazil.
That is an overrated country
just nearby.
There are no proper mountains.
So we are famous for...
REPORTER: Pablo Escobar,
criminal del cartel...
-(RECORD SCRATCHES)
-No, no, no, no, no, no.
No. That doesn't happen anymore.
(VIBRANT MUSIC)
And we're finally here! Ah!
-(BALL THUDS)
-Sorry.
(ROSA SPEAKS SPANISH)
Ah, yeah, well, they say
they're gonna keep looking.
SANTI: Guys, we're gonna
make our way to the boat.
ROSA: But no guarantee.
-DOM: Great.
-EDITH: Awesome.
ANGIE: Edie, you can borrow
my clothes.
EDITH: I'm not gonna fit
into your clothes, babe.
Why does this always happen
to me and Dom?
DOM: What am I supposed to wear?
Whose clothes am I
supposed to wear?
(QUIRKY MUSIC)
(BOTTLES CLINK)
Wait up!
(GASPS) Rosa!
(BOTH SQUEAL)
Everyone, everyone,
this is Ximena.
-Hola, Ximena!
-Hola!
-OK, Mira. Angie. Jacinda.
-Hola!
-Bowie, Oly, baby Angelo.
-Hola.
Wow!
You're so brave to travel
with a tiny baby.
(OLY LAUGHS) Yeah.
OK, my boys.
Gabe, Seb and Santi.
(XIMENA LAUGHS)
Ay, Santi. We can speak
in English. It's OK.
Oh.
Uh, hi, I'm Edith.
I'm Angie's partner.
-Oh. Hi.
-Yes, Edith.
And Dom.
Dom, Ximena. Ximena, Dom.
He's divorced like you.
Ah! Rosa.
Hi, Katrina.
Uh... Ximena.
Oh. You can't take that in.
Well, it's... the only
luggage I've got.
(CREW MEMBER
CLEARS THROAT LOUDLY)
What did she say?
Yeah, she just said,
"Don't fall overboard."
(CREW MEMBER
CONTINUES IN SPANISH)
I think she was... sobre la...
Dad, she's saying
follow the instructions...
(CREW MEMBER
CONTINUES IN SPANISH)
...and something about safety.
About alcohol?
(YAWNS) I don't know, Dad.
How'd you know that?
I've been listening
to your Duolingo for weeks.
It's actually not that
dissimilar to English.
Don't you think?
SANTI: Huh.
-Hurry up, bro.
-DOM: Wait, wait, wait.
-CREW MEMBER: Gracias.
-(BOTTLES CLINK)
Oh, wow.
CREW MEMBER:
(LAUGHS) Hi!
Hmm?
Yes, it's very hot.
I just had to take it off.
No, no, no.
No, but it's not...
I need to confiscate this,
please, seor.
Have to drink alcohol!
(PLAYFUL MUSIC)
(PLAYFUL MUSIC CONTINUES)
('SILENT NIGHT'
PLAYS OVER TANNOY)
BOWIE: Ooh, ooh, ooh.
(DOM SIGHS)
DOM: 10 days?
('SILENT NIGHT'
IN SPANISH PLAYS)
Look, we're VIPs.
Hey?
(MUTTERS) Tell that
to the cabin.
(STATIC CRACKLES AND HISSES)
(MUTTERS) 10 fucking days.
(TURNS VOLUME DOWN)
(ANGELO GURGLES)
JJ: Mum.
(SANTI SIGHS)
-Mum.
-OLY: Mmm?
Mum. Mum!
Can I sleep out on the top deck?
I wanna watch the ocean.
No, you can't sleep
on the deck, J.
Take your shoes off
and have a shower, please.
JJ: No way.
We've been in transit
for 40 hours.
Don't care.
You'll feel better.
JJ: No, I won't.
Um, hello? Little help?
SANTI:
Jay, have a shower, please.
OK, Papi.
SANTI: Thank you.
Ol, I don't think she's
forgiven you for having Jelly.
Hey! VIP drinks
with the captain.
(MUTTERS) I am so tired.
I feel amazing.
(SHOWER RUNS)
Do you know the amount
of energy it takes
to breastfeed a baby for one day
is like running 11 kilometres?
How would anyone measure that?
And being pregnant?
It's like having two rockmelons
and a watermelon
strapped to your torso.
I saw that challenge on TikTok.
While literally
all of your energy
is being diverted
to feeding a baby.
What's your point?
My point is if you wanna have
a 'who's the most exhausted'
competition,
you have no idea
who you're dealing with.
(PLAYFUL MUSIC)
Where are you going?
SANTI: I need some air.
Well, are you gonna
come to the drinks?
SANTI: Yep.
JJ: Mum, can I play Wordle
on your phone?
(DOOR BEEPS)
Oh, look at this! It's so sweet!
Ha-ha!
(SALSA-INFLECTED CHRISTMAS MUSIC
PLAYS OVER TANNOY)
(SIGHS)
Do you think they're
gonna turn that thing off?
ANGIE: The shower's cute.
Ooh! Tiny little Colombian soap!
-Oh!
-(LAUGHS)
Oh, the carpet! So fun!
(ANGIE LAUGHS)
Do you know where
I packed the Kwells?
ANGIE: Rosa said there were
over three weeks of
daily traditional gatherings
and beautiful rituals
here in Colombia at Christmas.
Jesus. How many?
(ANGIE LAUGHS)
It's so exuberant here.
The colour and the energy
and the music.
It's like they're grabbing life
by two hands. I love it!
(EDITH LAUGHS) Well...
...lucky I didn't pack this
in my suitcase.
-(ANGIE LAUGHS)
-(ZIPPER BUZZES)
What's so funny?
Oh. Oh, wow.
(BOTH LAUGH)
We're a lesbian trope.
No!
-(ROSA SQUEAKS)
-Mmm!
Ooh, very fancy, Rosa!
Oh!
ROSA: S.
Oy!
Oh, s.
-Ay, Rosa.
-(CHUCKLES)
You're going to have
a good time!
S, verdad?
('BAKANOA' BY BAKANOA PLAYS)
(PASSENGERS CHEER)
Yeah!
(BOTH CHEER)
Whoo!
Hey, hey, hey, hey,
hey, hey, hey, hey!
-BOTH: Bakanoa!
-(SONG ENDS)
(BOTH SQUEAL)
(BOTH SPEAK SPANISH)
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
-Buenas noches.
-Hola.
Ay! (LAUGHS)
We welcome you and your
many Australians on board.
ROSA: Yeah.
Thank you, um...
Thank you.
(SALSA MUSIC PLAYS)
(SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY)
Oh, hey, is this a bit of
a lesbian merge
that's happening here, perhaps?
OK.
ROSA: Hello, hello.
I made a family itinerary
for everyone.
-Oh, you made it.
-Oh, wow!
Wow, Colombian cooking classes!
ROSA: S!
Compulsory fun.
There's quite a lot of it.
A champeta class.
BOWIE: Yes, morning yoga.
I love that.
Expert lectures in
Colombian ecology.
Oh, my God! I'm gonna barely
have time to write.
Oh, is this your memoir?
Uh, yeah, it's, you know,
sort of memoir,
sort of autofiction.
30,000 words so far.
Oh, wow!
Could I read it?
Uh, well, really?
You've got Jacinda and Jelly
and surely you want
a break, don't you?
Oh, Mum, this will be my break.
Um, oh, well, it's...
It's, um...
-It's warts and all.
-Well, I love editing.
I edit at work all the time.
It's literally my job
and I'm really missing it.
Jelly's eight weeks old
and my brain is literally
turning to mush.
OK, well, yeah,
I'd appreciate some feedback.
OLY: Thank you.
Only good things.
Sure.
You know what
she's just been through.
And she's getting joy
out of this.
Says the woman complaining
about coming on this cruise.
Only good things.
Of course!
I said I would do that.
(ANGIE LAUGHS)
Ay!
(CALLS) Dom!
Dom.
-You look amazing.
-(LAUGHS) Thank you.
-Remember Ximena?
-I do.
Great to see you, Haa...
How are you?
It's Ximena.
Ximena.
-S.
-Yes.
I was telling her all about you.
Mmm! All good things, I hope.
Yes.
Um, do you like the boat?
DOM: Tried these?
$15, that is.
$15 a pop for
watered-down drinks -
which wouldn't
have been a problem
if I could have brought my own
duty-free alcohol on board.
XIMENA: Sure.
(ROSA CHUCKLES AWKWARDLY)
-Very funny.
-Here, try it.
-Yeah.
-I'm not wrong, am I?
ROSA: Hm.
It's fine. (LAUGHS)
Can you try it?
-I'm good. Thank you.
-Do you think I'm lying?
Um...
Here. Just drink from there.
Um... It's OK. It's OK.
-(LAUGHS) OK.
-DOM: Excuse me...
No, he's...
Let me try yours.
(CHUCKLES) 'Cause he's funny.
He's funny.
(XIMENA LAUGHS AWKWARDLY) Yeah.
That is rank.
(UPTEMPO MUSIC PLAYS)
Linea. Thank you.
Por favor, stay in your line.
Yeah. Thank you.
-Por favor...
-ANGIE: Is this normal?
(MUSIC ENDS)
(APPLAUSE)
(SUAVE MUSIC)
EDITH: So funny.
OLY: Wow!
Bienvenido. Bienvenido.
Bienvenido.
Bienvenido a bordo.
Bienvenido a bordo.
Bienvenido a bordo.
Bienvenido.
Bienvenidos. Bienvenidos.
Seorita!
(GIGGLES)
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
-Poker.
-Poker?
(CAPTAIN SPEAKS SPANISH)
(AMERICAN ACCENT)
You're good, kid.
But as long as I'm around,
you're second best.
Steve McQueen.
'Cincinnati Kid'.
Edward G. Robinson.
Oh, yeah. Charlie. I'm an actor.
Ay! Movies?
Oh, yeah. So many.
Uh, I recently... 'Star Wars'.
-(WHISPERS) 'Star Wars'.
-CAPTAIN: Oh!
For you, sir.
El Capitn would
like to invite you
to play poker this evening
in the officers' lounge.
BOWIE: Oh, I... OK, yeah.
I'm so touched.
Thank you. I appreciate it.
Thank you.
Well, I'm my son's usual
poker partner, so...
...might I join you also this
evening, captain, my captain?
(WHISPERS)
(WHISPERS IN SPANISH)
-No.
-No.
(SUAVE MUSIC ENDS)
(INSECTS CHIRP)
In Colombia, Christmas
starts on December 7th
with La Noche de las Velitas,
the night of the little candles.
And then, from nine days before,
we get together every night
to pray.
(RECITES IN SPANISH)
Well, I mean,
it's actually a party.
(PEOPLE SING IN SPANISH)
ROSA: Because we sing
and eat and drink
for nine nights, every night,
around the nativity scene.
Because the nativity scene
is a very big deal because...
Everybody does one.
And you can use
all the little figurines
that you have at the house,
like the little zoo animals
and dolls
and Marvel characters
and just anything.
This one...
...is a very special one.
From my abuela.
Amen
We don't believe in Santa.
He was invented by Coca-Cola.
See, you're telling me
a creepy old man in
the North Pole is watching you?
(CHILD SCREAMS)
Seeing if you're being
naughty or nice?
(CHILD SCREAMS)
No.
Baby Jesus from heaven.
He's the one watching you.
Alleluia!
And he brings the presents.
(PRAYS IN SPANISH)
(ALL PRAY IN SPANISH)
Amn.
Hola, seor.
-Perfecto.
-(DOM WHISTLES 'JINGLE BELLS')
Excuse me, sir.
(STOPS WHISTLING)
It's very bad luck
to whistle on a boat.
(PEOPLE SING IN SPANISH)
(RESUMES WHISTLING)
(PEOPLE SING IN SPANISH)
(SMOOTH MUSIC PLAYS)
(OLY LAUGHS)
(SANTI LAUGHS)
Ah! S, s.
To empathise. To empathise?
SANTI: OK.
(BOWIE IN AMERICAN ACCENT)
These guys.
(CAPTAIN ASKS QUESTION)
Eh? Oh, no. I don't drink.
Just...
(ALL CHATTER INDISTINCTLY)
(SUAVE MUSIC)
(BOWIE SPEAKS INAUDIBLY)
BOWIE: This is... this is
the real stuff.
Excuse me.
Is that my confiscated alcohol
you're drinking?
No, I think that's my alcohol.
-He's taken it.
-No passengers.
No passengers?
Well, he's a passenger.
No. Gracias.
DOM: Bowie!
-Hey. Fans. (LAUGHS)
-Ah!
Bowie!
(RELAXED MUSIC)
(SHIP'S HORN BLOWS)
(TANNOY CRACKLES)
(SIGHS)
(CRACKLING INTENSIFIES)
(PLAYFUL MUSIC)
Hey, Ha-he-ha...
XIMENA: Hey, Dom.
Ximena.
Are you going to Bar today?
Uh, I don't know. Maybe.
I mean, I haven't got
actually any clothes or...
Oh! Uh...
(SOFTLY) Could you translate
something for him, please?
He's got my alcoholic gin,
and I would like it back,
and also the speaker
in my room, above the bunk,
it's really loud,
so I think it's broken,
so if he could please fix that.
Thank you.
(SIGHS) No. He can't fix it.
Uh...
(VIBRANT MUSIC)
Come on! Hey!
Hey!
(ALL CONVERSE INDISTINCTLY)
(MUSIC ENDS)
(PASSIONATE GUITAR MUSIC)
Cover me in beso
Beso, beso, besitos
I want you to take me
Take me, take me to Mexico
With every kiss
You've got me tongue-tied
Every caress
You've got me upside down
Cover me in beso
Beso, beso, besitos
Excuse me, ma'am.
May I practise
my English with you?
Um... um... lessons.
How do you like Colombia?
Learning?
It's great.
And the beautiful baby?
His name?
Angelo.
-Angelo. It's a good name.
-Oh.
How age?
How old?
Um, eight weeks.
Almost nine.
See? You can teach me.
(BOTH LAUGH)
We are going to
serve lunch soon.
Is there anything you need?
Because I'd be very pleased
to help you with anything.
You seem good.
Your English, I mean.
(CHUCKLES) It's sounding...
-SANTI: Hi.
-Hey!
Uh...
No.
-Yes.
-SANTI: No.
We would like lunch.
-SANTI: Oh.
-Thank you.
SANTI: Oh.
Didn't love how that guy
was talking to my wife.
"My wife"?
Yeah!
Also known as me.
(HOLIDAY-MAKERS
SING AND CHATTER)
I got this for you.
(WAVES CRASH)
-Thanks.
-You're welcome.
Is there alcohol in this?
(LIGHT MUSIC)
(ROSA AND XIMENA LAUGH)
They're too small.
We were supposed to be in
Mr Alvarez's math class.
But we snuck out
to go to the shops.
(GASPS) We had to go
through the cemetery
to take a bus to the city
so we didn't get caught.
And when we got on the bus...
BOTH: There is Mr Perez!
(BOTH LAUGH)
No!
Oh. Yeah, that... that's cool.
-That's great.
-That's really cool.
-S? Cool?
-Yeah. Yeah, cool.
You know what? We were watching
the World Cup together.
Do you know what
these kids were doing?
Going for Australia?
-Exactly. Going for Australia.
-No!
So I asked them why.
And they said, "No, Mama,
it's because Colombia is lame."
-GABE: Mm-hm. Mm-hm.
-Uh-huh.
So I asked
the rest of the family,
"What do you know
about Colombia?"
And they say, "Colombia is poor,
Colombia is dangerous."
El cartel, las drogas...
(CONTINUES IN SPANISH)
So I bring them here
to show them, look!
Look how beautiful it is.
No, just...
ANGIE: My marriage was already
in a state of disintegration,
my career ambitions stagnating.
And then, without any warning,
a baby crashes into our lives.
Oh.
ANGIE: Thrust back into
the merciless servitude
and broken nights of early
parenthood, I was reeling,
doing everything I could to
ease the transition for Oly.
But the intractability
and the savagery
of teenage girls...
What?
...should never be
underestimated.
(ANGIE CALLS OUT) Hey!
Oh, hi.
ANGIE: How you going?
OLY: Good.
Oh, um, it's... it's great.
I didn't know it was
about me having J.
Well, it's taken me
a long time to acknowledge
what a fulcrum point
in my life that was.
OLY: Oh.
-I mean, yours, obviously...
-Obviously.
...but mine so much more
than I'd actually realised.
OLY: Mmm.
You don't have to read it.
I know it's gonna be hard
because sometimes,
'cause I have to be
really honest -
but that's just what I have to
do with this, to be honest.
Mum, I think it's great
that you're doing this.
Aw, thanks!
'Cause I've always wanted
to write a book.
(BOTH LAUGH)
But life just got
in the way and...
...you know, teaching
and kids and...
OLY: Grandkids.
Um, I just have
just one small note.
(UNEASY MUSIC)
Um, well, you know, I think
in memoir,
with the first-person
point of view
being so central
to the narrative, uh...
...and I know this is... this is
totally not your intention,
but it can be easy to sort of
inadvertently de-centre or...
or completely erase
the experiences of
other people around you.
I know, I know.
Yeah, I've been thinking
about that a lot,
especially being on this trip.
-Oh, you have? Oh, great.
-Mmm. Yeah.
I mean, you mean Rosa.
I contributed to
the break-up of her marriage,
and she's been so generous.
I assumed you dealt with that
a long time ago.
No! No, we just buried it
and just pretend
it never happened.
EDITH: Always works.
ANGIE: Yeah.
No time like the present.
I'm gonna talk to her.
Oh, Mum, are you sure
that's a good idea?
Yes.
-Yeah. It's time.
-(INSECT BUZZES)
Ow!
Is anyone else getting bitten
by these midgy things?
Everywhere!
Mm-mm.
-Itchy.
-Are you? No.
They're... in the sand
or something.
OLY: No.
(EDITH SIGHS) Oh, God.
Whoo!
(XIMENA LAUGHS)
You know I've been working on
a book since I had the cancer.
Oh, the cancer book, yes.
No, a big market for that.
No, seriously, because
everyone has cancer.
I don't know why someone
would like to read about it,
but, you know, people
seem to be interested in it.
-Can we... I just wanted to...
-What?
What is it?
I, um...
So I've been thinking a lot
about what I did.
With Matias.
When you were married to him.
ROSA: Uh-huh.
Facing mortality, it just
makes you weigh up your life,
and I just want to say that I am
terribly, terribly sorry.
Um, I know it happened
10 years ago,
and we've just never
really spoken about it,
and I just wanna say that
I really, really regret it.
Well...
...I just feel like you will
go to hell for that, Angie.
(LAUGHS) No!
You don't even believe in hell!
What do you care?
(BOTH LAUGH)
You know what?
Ay, in life, we have to move on,
and the two best decisions
I have ever made in my life
was moving to Australia
and leaving Matias.
-(SEB YELLS) Mum!
-(GABE YELLS) Mum!
Mum, I thought you said
you wanted to go snorkelling!
Or some shit!
What about having your kids?
No, I'm still wondering
about that one.
(BOTH LAUGH)
(LIGHT GUITAR MUSIC)
-ROSA: Ohh!
-ANGIE: Oh, my God.
(ROSA LAUGHS)
G'day.
How are ya?
GABE: Yeah.
Ah! I know that one.
-I know that. You like.
-S?
(BOTH LAUGH)
(SALSA MUSIC PLAYS FAINTLY)
(SALSA MUSIC CONTINUES)
(BOTH LAUGH)
ANGIE: Ahhh!
Whoo!
(BOTH WHOOP)
-Cheers.
-Salud.
DOM: Ugh!
Look at him, huh?
Sitting there like
a great big, corrupt,
kleptocratic dictator, huh?
(SUCKS LIME)
Been a few of them
in South America, right?
Maybe it's part of the culture.
Yes.
That's probably true, you know?
Just like in Australia
it's part of the culture
that everyone rides kangaroos
and is full of self-pity, no?
Gracias.
Edie, are you sure that
we should be encouraging
Mum's writing?
-Why not?
-Because it's not very good.
That's a matter of opinion.
Uh, no, it's...
That's fact in this case.
She's just beat cancer
for the second time.
I don't know if having cancer
makes anyone a better writer.
Only good things.
No, you're right.
(LAUGHS)
Enjoy the night.
(ANGIE SIGHS)
Ximena said that I am
"espiritualmente Colombiana".
-Yay!
-Wow.
I'm so glad you pushed me
to speaking to Rosa, darling.
-Oh, that's good.
-Mmm.
And it has made me realise that
facing the hard things in life
is actually the only way
to let them go.
Wow.
You face those hard things, Mum.
Go deep.
I know you're being sarcastic,
but it's true.
Hey, Angie, think
you're ready for bed?
(ROSA LAUGHS)
Bed? (LAUGHS)
No, no-one is going to bed.
It's 10:30.
Don't be silly. (LAUGHS) Vamos!
(DOM SIGHS)
(MUTTERS) Shit.
Ay! (CONTINUES IN SPANISH)
I don't know what that means.
(MYSTERIOUS MUSIC)
It's very bad luck.
(SNAPS FINGERS)
(SALSA MUSIC ENDS)
('EL PODER DE MIS PECADOS'
BY ANTONIO SAVIA)
(USNAVY WHISPERS SENSUOUSLY)
('EL PODER DE MIS PECADOS'
BY ANTONIO SAVIA CONTINUES)
(SONG FADES)
JJ: Mum.
-Jesus.
-I feel seasick.
-Oh, OK, do you want...
-(VOMITS)
SANTI: What?
God.
(OLY WHISPERS)
Where's the Hydralyte?
(WHISPERS) It's in
the toiletry bag.
(OLY WHISPERS) It's not.
You said you packed it.
-I did pack it.
-Well, it's not in here.
OK, well, how about
you have a look?
(ANGELO CRIES)
(SIGHS) For fuck's sake.
JJ: Mum, you're supposed
to be helping me. I need you.
Remind me, which part of
this trip was the good idea?
(ANGELO CONTINUES CRYING)
What do you mean?
I don't know why you pushed
for this so hard, Oly.
It is insane to come overseas
with an 8-week-old baby.
-I did this for you!
-OK.
Well, don't do me
any favours, Ol.
Oh.
The Hydralyte's right here.
(ANGELO CRIES)
(SHIP'S HORN BLOWS)
(TREADMILL BEEPS)
(TREADMILL BEEPS REPEATEDLY)
(TREADMILL BEEPS ONCE)
(TREADMILL BEEPS REPEATEDLY)
('THE BREATH' BY FLORENT SABATON
AND SEBASTIEN LUNGHI)
(TREADMILL BEEPS REPEATEDLY)
(TREADMILL BEEPS REPEATEDLY)
(SANTI GRUNTS)
(USNAVY GROANS)
You win, amigo!
(THUD!)
(TANNOY CHIMES)
(CAPTAIN SPEAKS SPANISH)
Ah!
(TANNOY CRACKLES)
(DOM GROANS)
BOWIE: Why don't... Why don't
you just baffle it, Dad?
Yeah?
(LIVELY LATIN MUSIC)
Cartagena is one of the oldest
and most important ports
of the Caribbean.
It's famous for architecture
from the 16th, 17th
and 18th centuries,
and inspired Gabo's novel
'Love in the Time of Cholera'.
And the palenqueras
are icons of the city.
They are descendants from
the Afro-Colombians
that escaped Spanish
slavery in the 1600s.
And it is very, very beautiful.
Ay, you're gonna love it.
(RECORD SCRATCHES)
(GLASS SMASHES)
(BOTH LAUGH)
(LIVELY LATIN MUSIC CONTINUES)
ANGIE: Oh, mamacita!
(LAUGHS)
Ah!
(LIVELY LATIN MUSIC CONTINUES)
-(SPEAKS SPANISH)
-Yeah!
(LIVELY LATIN MUSIC CONTINUES)
(PEOPLE TRILL AND WHOOP)
(LIVELY LATIN MUSIC CONTINUES)
(BOTH SPEAK INAUDIBLY)
ANGIE: Sex with him was
frantic, addictive, chaotic.
The double betrayal
heightened it.
Yet it was with her
that I finally came home.
I found
the five-dimensional domain
of everything
that I'd been missing,
everything I needed.
Transcendence,
the softness of her skin,
the taste of her...
Ooh!
My God!
(INDISTINCT CHATTER NEARBY)
-(ANGIE LAUGHS)
-ROSA: Remember that?
-Yes.
-ROSA: That was so funny.
-Hey, darling.
-Hello, hello!
ROSA: Hola, hola.
ANGIE: Ah!
Oh, wow.
-Oh, Edie! Where have you been?
-Hey!
-What happened?
-EDIE: I got lost.
ANGIE: Ohh!
-I found her in Getsemani.
-Oh.
-It was a dodgy cab driver.
-Oh.
Oh, God, I need a drink.
OK. Drinks.
ANGIE: Oh.
(SIGHS)
Well?
ROSA: Gracias.
ANGIE: Oh!
(OLY GULPS)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Don't be such a prude!
You're my editor.
Oh, no. Not... not for this one.
Why not?
Mum! (CHUCKLES)
Are you trolling me? (CHUCKLES)
The... the sex stuff.
With... Santi's Dad.
And Edie.
Well, you inspired it.
-OLY: What?
-"Go deep. Face the hard thing."
Mum, we established
that I was being sarcastic.
Look, I... I...
I didn't realise
how much self-loathing
I was carrying around
about Matias.
And Rosa's forgiveness
has helped me,
just made me want to face it
full-frontal.
Well, it's that.
Oh, my God.
Oly, I am just trying
to be, honestly, to...
Just trying to speak your truth.
Yeah, I mean, that sounds
a little bit clichd,
but, like, yeah, I am.
I'm trying to bridge the gap
between expression
and, uh, experience.
Well, it's...
It's, uh... it's vibrant.
Yes. Yeah.
Life, sex, desire,
the whole mess.
I'm just trying to convey
how it feels to be alive.
God, I could be the next
Helen-Garner-cum-Erica-Jong.
Oh, Mum, please don't say 'cum'.
Hey, where's Santi?
Oh, he, um,
wanted to keep going,
but I was tired, so we split.
-Oh, is everything alright?
-It's fine.
ANGIE: Hmm.
-Gracias.
-ANGIE: To Rosa!
For bringing us to
this beautiful,
magical dream of a country.
Salud!
-(ANGIE SPEAKS SPANISH)
-ROSA: Gracias.
ROSA: Oh, stop it!
-(ANGIE SPEAKS SPANISH)
-Keep going.
(BOTH LAUGH)
EDIE: Just gonna go
and get a beer.
-ANGIE: Oh, have mine.
-No, no, I'll get my own one.
-Oh, Edie!
-Oh, you wanted one?
-No, no, it's good.
-It's so cold and delicious.
-I'm sorry.
-Mm!
(ANIMATED REED FLUTE
AND PERCUSSION MUSIC)
Yeah, that's amazing.
What I really need is,
um, sticky tape, uh...
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
No, like, um, electrical tape?
-MAN: Uh...
-(IMITATES RIPPING)
Oh, my God, Dum-Dum.
Give me your phone.
DOM: Uh, glue.
Some sort of adhesive?
(SPANISH TRANSLATION
ON PHONE APP)
DOM: Gracias.
Well done.
(ANIMATED REED FLUTE
AND PERCUSSION MUSIC)
(CAPTAIN SPEAKS SPANISH
OVER TANNOY)
(CAPTAIN CONTINUES OVER TANNOY)
(TANNOY SPEECH BECOMES MUFFLED)
(SIGHS)
(ANGIE RECITES IN SPANISH
OVER TANNOY)
More novenas.
It's only the sixth night.
How many are there again?
Nine.
Fuck me, it's never gonna end.
(RECITES IN SPANISH)
And what the hell's Angie doing?
When in Colombia...
How's that?
(CHUCKLES) It's great.
This one's about how I was
an ungrateful sociopath
of a teenager
who ruined my mother's life.
This is the best bit.
It says I came out of
the womb bossy.
I'm sure it doesn't say that.
(PASSENGERS SING IN SPANISH)
(LIVELY SPANISH MUSIC PLAYS)
Yeah.
(PASSENGERS SING ALONG)
(SANTI SIGHS)
OLY: What happened?
I hurt my shoulder.
Doing what?
(USNAVY SPEAKS INDISTINCTLY)
Oh, come on.
What?
Mama, I'm talking to Lilliana.
I don't want to do
this dumb lame shit, Mum.
(CRUNCHY GUITAR ROCK)
Sometimes nothing
is a cool card.
-(CAPTAIN LAUGHS)
-(WHISPERS) Oh, fuck.
(CHIPS CLINK)
(QUIRKY MUSIC)
(QUIRKY MUSIC FADES)
(SOFTLY) You're a dead man.
(SURF ROCK MUSIC)
(SURF ROCK MUSIC CONTINUES)
(SURF ROCK MUSIC CONTINUES)
(MOUTHS WORDS)
(SURF ROCK MUSIC FADES)
(SHIP'S HORN BLOWS)
(ROSA LAUGHS)
Mm. Mm.
(XIMENA GASPS)
ROSA: S!
-(XIMENA LAUGHS)
-(GASPS)
(MYSTICAL FLUTE MUSIC)
(GABE AND SEB
CHATTER INDISTINCTLY)
-No way, bro.
-No way.
What are you guys laughing at?
(LASER BEAMS ZAP)
In my day, it was all
'Call of Duty' and Skrillex.
-'CoD' still slaps. Yeah.
-Hey!
I told you, three things.
The first one, it was
the breaking of the mirror,
and I couldn't bury it.
And then Dom spilling the salt.
Second one.
Third one, the baby Jesus gone.
Bad things come in three.
That's... that's three.
So that means the bad thing's
already happened, yeah?
No, no. It means...
Oh, Angie, It means that
a bad thing is going to happen.
That's what it means.
It's going to happen.
ANGIE: Mm. Oh, I'm sure
he'll turn up.
And then... then the bad luck
will be reversed.
ROSA: No, I don't think
it works that way.
ANGIE: OK.
Are the boys gonna come tonight?
No.
Gabe is having girl problems
and...
I just...
(SIGHS) I just thought
they would love it here.
-Yeah, teenagers. Arggh!
-Yeah, but I...
I wanted to show
the whole family, you know,
where I was born
and... and where I grew up.
You know, what I miss.
And my boys cannot even...
They cannot even try
to have fun with me.
I don't...
Why they can't just love
what I love?
Very simple.
Hmm, it seems like Gabe's
having a good time.
Yeah, he's having a great time.
Going to get an STI
if he hasn't already.
And now we have a...
Well, we have a cursed cruise.
ANGIE: Hmm.
A cursed...
A cursed cruise!
Yeah.
(EDIE VOMITS)
ANGIE: Mm.
(EDIE COUGHS)
Ohh.
Ugh.
(ANGIE EXHALES)
Probably that crab at Bar.
Mm, but I had that too.
The ice in the drinks
at the old town.
Mm, no, Rosa only took us
to the best places.
I don't think it would be that.
Oh, fucking yay for Rosa.
What's that supposed to mean?
Oh, you just...
You're just talking about her
all the time.
And having so much fun with her
and praying with her.
What the fuck was that?
I mean, we're atheists.
(LAUGHS) When in Colombia...
Edie, I know you're not jealous
of Rosa.
EDIE: Of course I am.
I'm jealous of sharing you
with anyone.
-What?!
-With everyone. I...
I just want whatever time
we have left to be ours.
ANGIE: Mm.
We're gonna have the rest
of our lives together.
What if we don't?
Oh, don't be ridiculous.
Do you want me to stay on board
with you tonight?
No, no, no, no. No.
It's the Christmas lights, which
is a huge deal, apparently.
(SCOFFS)
-(MOANS)
-OK.
-Oh, I'm gonna be sick again.
-Ohhh!
-(EDIE VOMITS)
-(ANGIE MOANS SYMPATHETICALLY)
(SPANISH GUITAR MUSIC)
-Drugs are a fun time.
-Drugs are a really fun...
-So there's 50,000.
I actually got a second baggie
if that's of any interest.
That's so great. I have 6,000.
I'll take it. Have the drugs,
have a fun time.
You know,
I'm not full of self-pity.
-At all.
-Sure.
Well, you don't know me, so...
Most people I know
think that I'm, um...
Maybe it's the language barrier.
But you speak perfect...
Very funny.
(BOTH LAUGH)
Isn't this weird?
Your wife left you
for your sister,
and you're just fine with it.
You go on holidays with them
and your kids.
Well, she didn't leave me
for her, so...
Why would I indulge my anger...
...if it means I lose
two people I love?
(AIRY GUITAR MUSIC)
(AIRY GUITAR MUSIC CONTINUES)
(CAMERA CLICKS)
Ah!
(CAMERA CLICKS)
Oh, look! Oh!
(BOWIE SPEAKS SPANISH)
XIMENA: Take Legui,
Forajida, Los Maricas...
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
-I don't speak...
-(SPEAKS SPANISH)
Uh, Los...
You know, I will make you
a playlist.
Oh, that is awesome!
Um, should we go to
the Christmas lights?
-Yeah.
-Yeah!
BOWIE: Yeah,
that's a great idea.
You know, I'm going to
go back to the ship
to look for Nio Jesus.
-ANGIE: Oh, really?
-Yeah, I'm a little bit worried.
But you guys go. Have fun.
-ANGIE: Cool.
-ROSA: Go.
I'm gonna go off on my own.
Um, we might actually stay
and keep chatting, if that's...
Yeah, sure.
I would like another drink.
(DOM LAUGHS)
You'd probably like to hear
about some Australian music?
Sure!
Well, um, in 1996, uh,
a band by the name of
Magic Dirt, uh, left Geelong...
(LANGUID PERCUSSIVE MUSIC)
(LANGUID PERCUSSIVE MUSIC
CONTINUES)
(LANGUID PERCUSSIVE MUSIC
CONTINUES)
(MUSIC FADES)
-(GUITAR MUSIC PLAYS NEARBY)
-It's, like, really painful.
I have torn ligaments.
Well, maybe don't do dumb stuff.
Maybe don't flirt
with sailor boy.
(OLY SIGHS)
-I was feeding Jelly.
-And?
What do you want me to do,
run away?
Oly, you were enjoying it.
You've been enjoying it.
Yeah!
Yeah.
Maybe.
I had a baby eight weeks ago.
(SANTI EXHALES)
Santi, his accent
is like a magic spell.
Oly...
Can you not see that it's, like,
it's weird for me being here?
I'm from Chile.
My parents are Chilean.
You and Bowie speak
better Spanish than I do,
and then you're swooning
over Usnavy.
Yeah, I didn't think about that.
I remember my mum speaking
Spanish to me when I was little.
I wish I could
understand it better.
I think what's gonna happen
is that one day it'll just...
it'll just click into place
and you'll just be
speaking fluently.
And the more you practise,
the sooner that will be.
-That's classic Oly advice.
-It's true.
Hey, I'm really sorry.
I'm sorry
that I didn't understand
what this trip meant for you.
(BELL TOLLS)
('AVE MARIA' BY BACH/GOUNOD)
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
CHOIR: Gratia plena
Dominus
Tecum
Benedicta
Tu
In mulieribus
Et benedictus
Fructus
Ventris
Tui, Jesus
Sancta Maria
-Sancta...
-(INTENSE ORGAN CHORDS)
Maria...
(TING!)
Maria...
No, no, no, it's just...
It's just the shrooms.
It's just the shrooms.
(SIGHS)
Amen
Amen
Yes? Mm.
(LAIDBACK SPANISH MUSIC)
(LAIDBACK SPANISH MUSIC
CONTINUES)
(LAIDBACK SPANISH MUSIC
CONTINUES)
(TANNOY CHIMES)
(OFFICER SPEAKS SPANISH)
(ANGIE LAUGHS AND CHATTERS)
(FESTIVE SPANISH MUSIC
PLAYS SOFTLY)
(CLEARS THROAT)
Morning.
OLY: Hi.
(SIGHS)
All OK?
Yeah.
Which bit are you up to?
You know it wasn't easy. For me.
And this is reading like
I was some sort of spoilt kid
having a tantrum
because I didn't get
what I wanted for Christmas.
And now I'm reading that Bowie
was your easy child...
...and that
"His perfect birth augured"
"his joyfully offbeat
childhood."
And you call yourself
a feminist.
You weren't worried about
de-centring Rosa?
Not especially.
OK. Well, you should read
what I've written this week.
It's gonna be my final chapter.
You know what, Mum?
I think I've read enough.
Oly, this is...
Hello!
-JJ: It's Navidad!
-It is Navidad!
-Oly, it's...
-It's Navidad.
-ANGIE: Mm-hm.
-Should we get some brekkie?
-Hi, darling. Good morning.
-OLY: Get a plate.
Wow.
-SANTI: All good?
-Yeah. Just fantastic.
(WHISPERS)
(FESTIVE SPANISH MUSIC
PLAYS FAINTLY)
(CAPTAIN MUTTERS INDISTINCTLY)
(SIGHS)
Just...
(CLEARS THROAT)
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
This is your captain
speaking here from the bridge.
(CONTINUES IN SPANISH)
(MUFFLED ANNOUNCEMENCONTINUES OVER TANNOY)
-Buenos das.
-Buenos das.
(CHUCKLES) It sounds a lot
better when you say it.
(BOTH LAUGH)
(MUFFLED ANNOUNCEMENCONTINUES OVER TANNOY)
(ADHESIVE TAPE RIPS)
ANGUS: Oh!
XIMENA: Oh!
(ANNOUNCEMENT CONTINUES LOUDLY
OVER TANNOY)
Oh!
-You alright?
-Uh-uh.
I'm so sorry.
XIMENA: Oh!
DOM: The hell?
You made that to stop
the captain's voice?
-DOM: S.
-Ohh.
That is it. I have had enough!
Bien? Contenta?
Perfecto.
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
(ROSA SPEAKS SPANISH)
Bowie?
Um...
DIEGO: De nada.
(DOOR OPENS)
(DOOR CLOSES)
Bowie!
(DETERMINED MUSIC)
Rosa!
Hey, guys, this, uh,
is my Australian friend.
Seorita.
-Buenas.
-Buenas.
ROSA: Hmm.
Thank you for the
beautiful earrings, Bowie.
-Oh, hey, hey, it's no problem.
-ROSA: Mm.
Very expensive?
S, esmeraldas Colombiana.
ROSA: Oh!
Why are you winning
so much money, Bowie?
-(WHISPERS) I'm lucky, OK?
-Oh.
I was blessed
by the Nio Jesus in Cartagena.
Hm. How lucky!
-I know.
-Yes! (GIGGLES)
-What do you have in your hand?
-Nothing.
-Let me see.
-Nothing!
Which 'Star Wars' movie
did you say you were in?
-BOWIE: Uh, uh...
-Bowie!
One of the newer ones, actually.
It was a deleted scene.
-I-I might, uh...
-Bowie.
BOWIE: I'm gonna head out.
-(ROSA SPEAKS SPANISH)
-S.
Bowie!
Where's Captain Fuckface?
DIEGO: No lo s, seor.
ROSA: Bowie? Bowie!
-What?
-Bowie! Bowie!
BOWIE: What?!
Well, well, well,
El Capi-wanker.
You stole my gin.
You won't let me play poker.
I have not been able to sleep
in the world's smallest cabin
because you will not shut up
on a tinny tannoy
that you refuse to fix.
And now you have hurt my Ximena.
Oh, stupido Australiano, huh?
I think I know what that means.
Well, I don't know
what you're saying.
I'm saying go back.
-You go back.
-No, you go back.
ROSA: Bowie! Bowie.
-Bowie.
-What?
-What's in your hand?
-This hand?
No, the other hand.
Give me my glass!
Give it to me, you...
Bowie!
Ohh!
I swear I was gonna
give it back.
I was just doing really well.
(FIGURINE CLINKS)
Oh! No, no, no!
(CRIES)
(SHIP CREAKS AND RUMBLES)
(SHIP CREAKS AND THUDS)
-(GLASS BREAKS)
-Oh!
-That can't be good.
-(ALARM BLARES)
CREW MEMBER:
CAPTAIN: Ah!
(CAPTAIN SPEAKS SPANISH
OVER TANNOY)
I'll call you back, Sharon.
CAPTAIN:
Oh, we are fucked.
(YELLS INDISTINCTLY)
(SCREAMS)
(CAPTAIN SIGHS)
(GASPS)
You!
-Rosa...
-You!
You cursed us!
(AIR HISSES)
1350
(SANTI CHUCKLES AWKWARDLY)
(SPEAKS SPANISH)
S, s, s.
I was going to...
-About your... your drawing.
-Ah, yeah, Mira, Mira.
ANGIE: So much money!
SANTI: We could do another trip
to Colombia with this money.
-ANGIE: Merry Christmas!
-(BOYS EXCLAIM)
Edie, this one's for you.
Sorry, I asked him
to engrave a heart on it,
but he put it on Dom's. (LAUGHS)
Bowie. Where's Bowie?
Oh, he's sulking.
He didn't get the role.
-Aw!
-DOM: Ho, ho, ho!
-JJ: Dum-Dum!
-(SANTI LAUGHS)
Merry Christmas!
Ay, Dom... How many times?
We don't do Santa, Dom.
I bought it in Carta-henya.
No, Cartagena.
And then the ones
that bring the presents
is El Nio Dios in Navidad.
-But he's gone.
-DOM: Sorry.
I was trying to lighten
the bloody mood.
ANGIE: Oh, there's a present
for you, Dom.
You know, I asked Usnavy,
El Capitn,
almost everyone on the crew.
Who knows how long
it'll take to fix?
About the ship?
Oh, I'm sorry, Rosa.
Maybe they'll get it fixed
in time and we can keep going.
Are we moving? We're not moving.
(DOM YAWNS)
(RHYTHMIC CLICKING)
OK, come on!
It's Navidad.
Let's play a game.
No.
A Christmas game?
OLY: It's a team-building
workshop I did at council.
(QUIRKY MUSIC)
What skill would you bring
to the apocalypse?
-SANTI: Oh!
-Ay, no.
-It's a bit depressing.
-OLY: It's fun. It's fun.
'Cause we all have to work
together to survive.
So how are we gonna do that?
Because there's no internet.
Who's gonna grow our food
or who's gonna handle
the weapons or repair machinery?
I could ferment.
I can make pickles.
Oh, and I did read
a really good article
about how to build
a root cellar.
So I could do that.
-Mum's in the bunker.
-ANGIE: Yay, I'm safe.
DOM: I could make home brew
and, um... and bathtub gin.
We could do that together.
-Dad's in the bunker.
-(DOM LAUGHS)
-We'll all be drunk.
-SANTI: I know what I can do.
-OLY: Yes?
-I can make fires.
-And run security.
-Yes, you can.
OK, I can do first aid.
Actually, I'm really good
at, um, offline navigation.
ROSA: Great!
And then Bowie can bring
stealing and gambling
and blasphemy
to the apocalipsis.
Uh, I've just spoken to
the captain.
Uh, ship's fucked.
We're not going to San Andres.
(SOBS)
Make-up!
Can I have make-up?
(WHIMPERS)
(PERCUSSIVE MUSIC)
ANGIE: I found that
much-anticipated events
often collapse under the weight
of their own expectation,
which is why I've always
preferred surprises
in which, lucky me,
my life has been rich.
(GENTLE GUITAR MUSIC)
I love you.
Aw.
-Oh.
-Yes.
-Hello.
-(MURMURS TEASINGLY)
(LAUGHS)
-(PAGES FLUTTER)
-(BOTH CHUCKLE)
(CAPRICIOUS MUSIC)
Angie.
Angie, the paper!
-Oh.
-Look!
Oh!
Oh, no! I just dropped
the ones I'm picking up!
EDITH: I can't believe this.
(CAPRICIOUS MUSIC)
ANGIE: Arggh!
You're joking!
BOTH: Oh!
(PENSIVE MUSIC)
EDITH: Here.
-I'm so...
-How?
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
-Yeah.
-In a dream.
(SHIP RUMBLES)
(SHIP'S HORN BLOWS)
-What?
-(TANNOY CHIMES)
CAPTAIN:
-(SANTI GASPS)
-(ROSA SQUEALS)
No way!
-It's good, right?
-Yeah, sure.
(UPBEAT LATIN MUSIC)
(ANNOUNCEMENT IN SPANISH
OVER TANNOY)
(UPBEAT LATIN MUSIC CONTINUES)
(ANGIE CRIES)
It's all gone!
I know. I'm so sorry.
All that effort.
Just wasted.
It's not wasted!
Mum, you wrote a beautiful,
brutally honest account
of your life.
Maybe it's for the best.
(MYSTICAL PERCUSSION)
You're happy it's gone.
I'm not happy it's gone.
You didn't want an honest,
unfiltered version
of how hard it was,
and how hard you were
out in the world.
Well, maybe I'm not devastated.
But what I mean is
a lot of great authors
talk about how they make a few
attempts before they nail it.
You just have to
pick yourself up
and you have to write
another book.
(SOBS) Pick myself up again?
I can't keep picking myself up.
(SOBS DRAMATICALLY)
I don't think I will.
(SOBS DRAMATICALLY)
TANNOY: Flight number 575
to Sydney via Santiago
boarding at gate 25.
OK. Well, Mum, maybe next time
just get a laptop.
(AIRY GUITAR MUSIC)
(AIRY GUITAR MUSIC CONTINUES)
(AIRY GUITAR MUSIC CONTINUES)
(AIRY GUITAR MUSIC CONTINUES)
(AIRY GUITAR MUSIC CONTINUES)
(AIRY GUITAR MUSIC CONTINUES)
(AIRY GUITAR MUSIC FADES)
(DISTANT SIREN WAILS)
(DOG BARKS)
Come on, amor.
Why don't we just get
a bottle of champagne,
celebrate together?
It's New Year's Eve.
No, no, no, thank you.
I... I just want
to go early to bed
and then wake up in a new year.
-Shh! Shh!
-(ANGIE CHUCKLES)
And what about
all the traditions?
No, no, it doesn't matter.
I don't want to do anything.
-Nothing?
-No!
-Anything?
-No.
Nothing, not even this?
-Surprise!
-(ALL CHEER)
(LAUGHS)
You did this for me?
SEB: Yeah, Mama.
-(ANGIE LAUGHS)
-OK, todos.
Ao nuevo,
Colombiano,
aqui vamos!
(ALL CHEER)
I'm in love in the city
I'm in love
In the city of sound
I'm in love
It's kind of pretty
I'm in love
In the city of sound
In the sound, in the sound
In the sound...
Ao nuevo, New Year's Eve,
you have to run around your
neighbourhood with a suitcase,
with all the people
that you love,
so you can travel a lot
next year.
I'm in love in the city
I'm in love
In the city of sound...
(ALL WHOOP AND LAUGH)
I'm in love
It's kind of pretty
I'm in love
In the city of sound
In the sound, in the sound
In the sound
In the sound, in the sound
The city of sound
In the sound, in the sound
In the sound
In the sound, in the sound
(ALL LAUGH AND CHEER)
Ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh
Ooh-ooh-ooh
Ooh-ooh-ooh...
-Vamos!
-Ooh-ooh-ooh, ooh-ooh-ooh
Ooh-ooh-ooh
Ooh-ooh-oooh
And when the clock
hits midnight,
you have to eat 12 grapes,
one for every month of the year,
and then you have to make
12 wishes.
(ANGELO BURBLES)
(QUIET CHATTER NEARBY)
Grangie, can I take Jelly?
Yes, of course you can. (LAUGHS)
JACINDA: Oh, hello.
ANGIE: Aw!
(CRICKETS CHIRP)
What did your final chapter say?
What?
The whole thing?
OK, I think I remember
the best bits.
It said...
...I learned that parenthood
is never finished.
I learned that families
can survive
astonishing ruptures.
I learned that love
is all that counts.
I learned that my daughter...
...is the strongest person
I know,
and she gave me something
as beautiful and as miraculous
as another childhood.
-OK, weirdo.
-(LAUGHS)
(ANGIE CHUCKLES)
Yeah, I'm much better now. Much.
Que es? (GASPS)
And then we burn
a big ao viejo doll
that is full of fireworks
so we can say goodbye
to all the bad things
that happened that year
and make way
for a beautiful new beginning.
('COUNT YOUR BLESSINGS'
BY MATTIEL)
Cheers.
Ahhh!
Everybody,
it's close to midnight!
-SANTI: Oh, whoa, whoa!
-OK, here we go! Here we go!
ALL: 10, 9, 8, 7...
(SANTI COUNTS IN SPANISH)
...tres, dos, uno!
Your shoes keep turning
Different shades of blue
The colours
Of the other fools before you
And skin keeps turning
Different shades of red
The colours
Of the other voice
That's swimming in your head
Make yourself at home again
Count your blessings
One to 10
Your body will be
Whole again
Your body
Will be whole again
Make yourself at home again
Count your blessings
One to 10
La-la-la-la-la
La-la, la-la-la-la-la
And make yourself
At home again
Count your blessings
One to 10
La-la-la-la-la...
Whoo!
La-la-la-la-la
La-la, la-la-la-la-la
(MYSTICAL PERCUSSION)
(WHIMSICAL MUSIC)