Burying Yasmeen (2019) Movie Script

There was a time
We had a world to show forever
And any storm out there
We'd weather
Just you and I
And then you came
And knocked me down
Twist my sentences around
Where on earth
Am I supposed to be
I'm all alone
[Jason crying]
I can't believe
[distant crying
and music continues]
-Does he always play
music when he bathes?
-I don't know.
He's a romantic.
I'm a romantic.
-Oh, yeah?
Hold on a second.
Is he crying?
Nah, he's singing.
Kind of sounds like crying.
Nah, it's bad singing.
No, I'm pretty sure
that's crying.
I think you underestimate
how terrible his voice is.
No, no, no,
he's definitely crying.
Maybe? But that's okay
though because crying's like his
thing. It's like you and yoga.
Okay, seriously.
What is going on in there?
Okay. You know the ex-wife
he's always talking about?
-Yeah. Um, she died.
Yeah, it was a heroin overdose.
She was really into drugs.
Jason doesn't know that though.
-Oh my God!
-Really bad news.
-It's terrible news.
-Terrible news.
Poor Jason.
Yeah. Poor guy.
-Oh my God!
-I feel really bad for him.
I'm going to go check on him.
Are you-- did you--
Did you finish?
Yeah, it was great.
You didn't notice? I'm
going to check on Jason.
Just let the man bathe and
grieve. His ex-wife died.
[knocking on door]
Hey, Jason.
You're fine, right?
Shannon, he's fine!
-Are you sure?
If we leave, you're
not going to, uh...
-Okay. Yeah. No.
Silly. I wasn't even going to...
[Shannon] Does he want us
to bring him a churro doughnut?
Yeah! No, he'd love one.
Jason, listen.
Like, if you need to,
you know, talk about all
of this that's going on,
I would find you
someone who's qualified,
because I'm completely
Can you-- close
the-- close the...

[high-pitched voice]
"Jippy Peanut Butter.
It keeps you hopping."
[music fades]
[woman echoing]
Jason! Jaaaason...
Return the ring to me.
We will be together in eternity.
[lightning striking]
I will.
[birds chirping]
My turn. Okay. The
listing agent at the open
house asked me out.
Really? What did he look like?
He was Brazilian.
I can't tell if you're serious.
-Mm-hmm. Yeah.
-Your turn.
Well, yesterday at Denny's
I was at lunch and the waitress
gave me a free dessert.
-That's your big secret?
-Yeah, it's been
a slow week for me.
I have one more.
Yeah? By all means
let's hear it.
[knocking at the door]
-[Jason] Mike?
Is it okay if I take
all the apples?
Sure. Yeah. Take all the apples.
Thank you.
Okay, so what's the big secret?
-I'll wait 'til Jason's
not at the door.
-He's not at the door.
Do you have
any books on tape?
Yeah, yeah, lots of them.
I can't tell if you're serious.
It's not 1995, Jason.
Nobody has books
on tape anymore.
You can get it on your
phone, though.
Okay. Wait. Jason,
what are you doing?
I'm going to Salt Lake City.
For Yasmeen's funeral.
-Your ex-wife?
She came to me in a dream.
She said "Return
the ring to me. We'll
be together for eternity. "
[crow singing]
Anyway, we're going
to renew our vows before
they put her underground,
so we'll be together forever.
It's pretty cool.
I'm pretty sure he
needs psychiatric help.
Yeah, I don't think he
should go on this road trip.
[Jason going downstairs]
[closing the door]
What's the big secret?
I'm pregnant.
[loud heartbeats]
That's some big news.
That's some big, great news.
I got to call some people.
I'm so happy about this.
So, why'd you decide to join me?
I just think it's
really important.
[Jason] Thank you.
We've been driving for,
like, twenty minutes.
I have mild scoliosis.
So, I have to stretch.
I have to be limber
for when we get to Utah.
Well, the viewing's
tomorrow night and
then the funeral is Monday,
and then, on Tuesday,
I'm going to try and
find an apartment
overlooking the cemetery.
Why are you using a paper
map? Here, I have an app.
[app] Where are
you headed, friend?
Yasmeen and I always used paper
maps. It's how we travelled.
Okay, but this is an app
that'll make things quicker.
-"The road traveled less."
That sounds slow.
So, we are going to make
a few stops along the way.
Hit a couple of hot spots.
[Mike] Okay.
You can see the little
hearts there.
[cell phone ringing]
You going to get that?
Nah. No. No.
Mike, that's Shannon.
Yeah, yeah.
Shannon's calling.
Hey, watch out for
the-- um, dead skunk.
Not sure how you missed it.
Maybe it's the map.
You know this-- this is where
we first held hands.
I was driving her to Vegas
for a bachelorette party
cause her license
was suspended.
I sure miss her.
[cell phone ringing]
So, Jason, you're probably going
to notice Shannon calling me
off and on. Maybe frequently.
And I'm not going
to answer. And you
shouldn't worry about it.
I'm not worrying about it.
You shouldn't worry about it.
I appreciate that, but
she might be in trouble.
She's calling a lot.
She is calling me a lot,
but you're going through
a lot and so for your sake,
for you, I need to not
answer this phone.
[cell phone calling]
We're walking on the face of
Mars and I still have perfectly
clear service out here.
Is it Shannon?
-Everything, okay?
-Yeah, things are great.
I think I'm going
to break up with her.
Really? Why?
I just feel like
it's run its course.
I assumed between
the two of you, if anyone
would end it, it'd be her.
What?! No.
No, listen, I'm the
ultimate ender of things.
You know, I end it. Always.
You keep "hmm'ing"
me. Why do you
keep "hmm'ing" me?
The point is, you know,
it's been a solid dose
of commitment with her. And
what comes next?
Marriage? And a family?
This is a very
special place for us.
Right before she left, Yasmeen
was really into hide-and-seek.
-Yeah, she'd run away.
-I'd track her down.
She loved it.
I'd find her in the most
amazing places.
Seaside cliff.
Freeway overpass.
The ledge of this parking
structure downtown.
So, this game always ended
in really high-up places.
Yeah. She liked the view.
This was our room.
The King Kamehameha suite.
We didn't get a lot
of sleep that night.
-Cause of all the traffic.
-Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Got enough.
[Mike] Well, I guess
you shouldn't have
pre-paid that room.
[Jason] It was going to
save me ten bucks a night.
I got to go to the bathroom.
[Mike] And the
adventure thickens.
Maybe traffic will be
lighter when we're done.
-Is that a nudie?
-That was a Yasmeen
nudie on your phone.
-[Jason gulps]
Jason, I saw Yasmeen
naked on your phone.
No. Did not.
-Let me see it.
Just for the record, she's dead.
There's spousal immunity
when it comes to photography.
No, there's not.
You're ashamed
of her nude form.
She's really just squeezing
them together there.
She knew I liked it.
I don't think she liked
herself, though.
She liked herself every night.
-Are those bite marks?
You know, I think
that's just a rash.
I never bit her.
Holy cow! Those
are totally bite marks.
We were together
when she took that picture!
I don't understand it. I don't
think she would do that.
I don't know why. It
doesn't make any sense.
I think the trick in life,
Jason, is just not to
care about anything.
[woman] Peter. Come here.
You tell Shannon you love her.
Yeah, but you can tell people
all kinds of things as long
as you don't mean them.
Pregnancy scare?
Okay. You know, I was
in the exact same spot
as you a few years ago.
I went back.
Never go back.
-Did you pull a beer
out of your pocket?
-Yeah. I'm giving it to you.
Pretty soon you're going
to be scooping shit out
of a six-year old's shorts.
This is your future.
-[woman] What are you doing?
-I'm communing with
people on the road.
[man] I'm communing
with people on the road.
-It's called civility, Deborah!
-I don't want it.
Oh, man. Hot, hot.
Oh! Excuse me.
-I said, "Excuse me."
Like, "excuse me" like
you want to talk to me,
or "excuse me"
I'm sorry for bumping
into you, excuse me?
Just excuse me,
like uh, sorry for bumping
into you, I didn't want talk,
I was just being polite."
I have Asperger's.
Oh. I'm sorry.
It's pretty mild.
Your eyes are...
-I didn't say anything...
-No, I just...
-After you.
I just said your eyes
are very clear and green.
I don't know if that's
a sign of Asperger's.
Or not. I don't think it is.

[crows singing]
[Mike] So much
for things clearing up.
You know, I think the Universe
may be calling to you, J.
I think we got
to go off the grid.
Where are you headed, friend?
Say it. Not a lot to lose.
Route to Salt Lake City.
-[music from app]
All square!
Let's go!
All right. Here we go.
Get along, little
doggies. Guhhuh!
[Jason] Please find a way
to turn off that music.
[Mike] You know, I don't
actually think you can turn
it off. It's beta mode.
In one mile, turn left!
Oh, no. Signal lost.
Actually, I saw
you back at the...
I know.
I'm Mike.
Less virgin.
More vag.
-So, what's up there?
Come get some.
[crows singing]
[crickets singing]
[animal agonizing]
At least he didn't do too
much damage to the car.
Hey, what's in the box?
You think you're ready?
-Be very careful.
Now, you're going to want
to remove the twine.
-Sure, uh...
-It's protective twine.
Just save that twine, please.
Great. So, now you're going
to want to lift the latch.
Nice and slow.
Now, my favorite poem
is on the top.
[suddenly breaking]
[animal noises]
[Jason] Go ahead.
Read another one.
"The likes of me and the likes
of she. The most beautiful
girl you've ever seen.
Never, oh never, shall
I ever dissever my soul
from the soul of Yasmeen."
I think that's what
they call a sonnet.
-You write that?
- Yes.
That's some Lord
Byron level shit.
I guess it's good you
never sent it to her.
-No, I...
-That'll be thirty-eight even.
You know, love is a lot
like my hand-cured elk
jerky. It goes real fast.
I think I'll just take this.
-Oh, were you
reaching for the...
-Yeah, yeah, I was.
You should try not loving
her for a while, bud.
She's dead.
Hmm. Well, shit happens.
-I will be in the car.
I like everything you got
going on in here with the
wisdom and the meats.
And this guy. Can
I get this guy too?
Hand-carved by Lakota.
La what?

Can we help you?
-What does your app say?
Does it say that
this is a highway?
How did you...
Are you MMGood69?
This guy, actually.
I have to update the database.

She's hot, though, right?
That TRTL girl.
She's like twelve years old.
And she has Asperger's.
Yeah, but a lot of people
have Asperger's and
you can still have sex.
Besides, this is the
desert. You can do
whatever you want out here.
You could kill her.
What are you talking about?
The point is, just
because she Asperger's,
doesn't mean you shouldn't
have made a move on her.
I haven't made a move on
anyone in about seven years.
Seven years?
Yeah, since Yasmeen.
I mean, women have tried
to put moves on me.
Sorry! Married.
-Excuse me.
Married. Sorry.
Married. Sorry. Married.
So, you haven't touched a single
girl since Yasmeen left.
No! I haven't even
touched myself.
[animal noises]
What would be the point?
If she's not around,
it doesn't work.
It'll be a whole different
story when I get to Utah.
Hey, I think there's something
really wrong with this cat.
[Mike] I think we need to look
at it from his perspective.
You know, he's just
a cat. Living his cat life.
Doing things that
cats are prone to do.
But then one day, he meets
a hot young lady cat.
Cat tells him she's just
like him. Wants to chill.
Have a lot of cat sex.
Hooks him with her cat magic.
Starts feeling things.
But it's a trap.
She doesn't want to just have
cat sex. She wants a cat baby.
And then, just out
of nowhere, pf!
Run over.
I guess what I'm
trying to say is,
sometimes in life it's
better to just be put
out of your misery
than face your grim reality.
I think we should-- I think
we need to put him down.
You do realize
that's not a cat, right?
[app] Keep going straight
for seven miles.
You're on the right path.
In two miles, take a right.
Turn right.
Oh, no! Signal lost.
Yes, yes. No, no.
Other way. Other way.
You know what?
I'm just going to go with,
that we're not lost. Okay?
We're slightly off the path.
And, really, it's
not the app's fault.
You know what it is?
It's the fact that your car's
made out of the same stuff
they make gum wrappers out of
and it's messing
with the signal.
[dramatic music]
This doesn't look like a road.
I mean it's very
clearly a type of road.
I think it's more
like a river bed.
[Mike] You know,
it says it's a road.
[Jason] I think it's a wash.
[Mike] Nobody knows
what a wash is.
[Jason] Here we go.
[animal agonizing]
That's the biggest
rock you could find?
-So just-- drop it on his
head, straight down?
-Throw it straight down.
-What if I miss?
-Then we'll try again.
What if it doesn't kill him?
Then we just knock him out,
pop his head under the tire,
and then we'll finish it clean.
Here, you're stronger than me.
No. You need to learn
the full lesson here.
You ran over him.
You took his little life
into your hands, okay?
That's responsibility.
-You're scared.
You are scared to kill him.
No, I'm not scared
to kill it. You just have
a lesson to learn here.
Okay. Then I'll learn it
by watching. You do it.
You stand the best chance
of doing it in one shot anyway.
Okay, then.
So, I just-- drop it
on his head,
straight down?
[making noise]
You know, I think
he could pull through.
He could recover.
I think.
Do you ever think about, like,
true love?
You know, I actually
keep pictures of all the girls
I've been with on my phone.
It's the Lady Library.
I got Niki nudies. Nattie
nudies. Judy nudies.
It's all alphabetical.
I keep like
one picture of
one girl on my phone.
Yeah, but you should
delete that one.
You ever been cheated on?
Never. I've done a lot
of cheating, though.
Did you ever cheat on Shannon?
[Jason] Do you think she left
me because of my penis size?
[Mike] I don't know.
[distorted voice] I love you.
[distorted voice] Yasmeen.
Oh. Oh. Oh, jeez!
[animal noises]
[car beeping]
What in the world are you doing?
We've gone off the grid.
Disappeared completely.
Shannon hasn't texted
me in over twelve hours.
Yeah, the funeral
is tomorrow morning.
Do you think my phone is broken?
I've been waiting for six
years to find out whether
Yasmeen still loves me.
And now, I know.
I'm not going to let
anything distract me.
-What is that?
-It's a trap.
Seems weird she hasn't
texted me, though. Right?
No, I don't think it's
so weird, considering
you guys are broken up
and there's probably plenty
of dudes trying to get with her.
You think there's a lot
of dudes trying to
get with Shannon?
Sure. She's an attractive girl.
I mean, she's no Yasmeen,
but she's a solid nine.
Have you ever been outdoors?
I read a survival book,
so-- Into the Wild.
That's not a survival book.
He doesn't survive.
I saw the movie.
He still dies.
I didn't see the whole movie.
You know, you're not going to
be able to charge your phone.
[Jason] This is-- interesting.
[Mike] Well, it is the road
traveled less. T-R-T-L.
[Jason] It's like the Goodyear
blimp had diarrhea.
What in the world? The tank was
only half empty when we parked.
Well, Jason, you got
to start looking at these
things as being half-full.
Well, now it's just empty.
I don't know.
Is this even a road?
Oh, yeah, I turned the car on
last night to charge my phone.
What and you just
let the engine run?
I didn't want
to kill the battery.
Listen, we're never going
to get out of here if my phone
doesn't have any power.
Well, next time,
how about you plug it in
when we're actually moving?
It's okay. All right?
These tanks are good
for another fifty miles
after reading empty. I promise.
There's going to be
an oasis somewhere.
What does your phone say?
It's dead again.
Fucking grid.
[Mike] Well, the app said
there's a lake, right here.
[Jason] We're in a lake.
We followed a wash
into a dry lake bed.
This could be
a Yasmeen miracle.
-Oh yeah?
Random broken-down
car in the desert?
She's giving us a stepping
stone so I can get to her.
No, I kind of suspected
something like this.
I'm trying to breathe
through my mouth.
Some Yasmeen miracle, huh?
It's your fault we're following
the stupid app and I'm not
going to let that stop me.
Okay. I merely suggested
the use of the app.
You made the decision
to follow my suggestion and
that makes you accountable.
Jason, come back here.
You're walking aimlessly
in an endless direction.
There's no point... Jason!
Jason! You're not even
walking in a straight line.
You're slowly curving.
I'm devoted, not delusional.
[epic music]
It says this is a road.
It's not.
No shit.
Where's your pal?
You know, the charming one?
[epic music]
[music distorting]
[music ends]
[music box tune]
[Jason lightly moaning]
Jason, how did you
even get up here?
We've been looking
for you for hours.
Hey, this is Zannah.
Remember her?
The geographical surveyor?
She's going to take us
to a gas station, Jason.
It's going to be, okay.
After I finish my rounds.
TRTL uses satellite imagery
and it's been mistaking
roads for washes a lot lately
and leading people
into them. Supposedly.
I mean, clearly,
it's doing exactly that.
Jason, I know you warned
me on the app. I'm with
you now. It was a bad idea.
You look like my grandma after
she gets out of the shower.
We're going to miss
the viewing tonight, aren't we?
It's a wash, guys.
It was never a road.
Probably never will be.
Oh. It looks like your
buddy's feeling better.
He's gone.
[Zannah screaming]
This wasn't one
of those emotional
support animals, was it?
Where are you guys headed?
Salt Lake City. So, my friend
Jason here can go to the
funeral of his ex-wife.
Wife-- we separated-- died.
[Zannah] I go to
concerts sometimes.
-You ever been to a
Three Doors Down concert?
It sounds weird.
We only have country
music out here.
And western.
Sometimes country-western.
One time I wrote a country song.
That's cool. I think.
Yeah. It was after Yasmeen left.
-I got to get out.
I'll be back in three minutes.
-All right. How
are you doing that?
You're warming up her pussy.
What? No!
She clearly wants you in some
kind of like a sexual way.
Let's just get to Yasmeen.
I mean, the tension
was palpable.
It's not my fault.
I told you, women are
always coming on to me.
Well, I don't know about that,
but we are in the desert
and things are really
skewed out here.
Do you think that
she thinks that I think
I'm flirting with her?
I definitely think that
she thinks, you think,
you're flirting with her.
And honestly,
it's a little disrespectful to
the memory of Yasmeen.
I'm not judging you;
I'm just saying that.
But no judgment.
I'll just tell her
I'm not interested.
No, no. No, no, no.
Don't do that.
That'll just make her
want you more, okay.
You need to squash the spark.
Why? Because I'm
squashed between your
two sets of raging genitalia
and it's very hot in here.
I don't think that's my fault.
It is, though, Jason.
It is your fault.
How am I supposed to squash it?
Just sing her one of those
songs of yours, all right?
That'll dry up even the
most moist of vaginas.
Just... [slurps]
You got like a handful
of them, don't you?
-Do you have an
iPhone charger?
-I use a satellite phone.
And I'm always charged up.
So, what brought you into
geographical surveying?
I like the outdoors.
And I like maps.
I like maps.
I like the bumpy roads,
too. Sometimes I
make noises on them.
I've been coming here
For about a week
Talking to you
Is my little treat
Besides the beam
You're the only thing I like
About this bar
I know I'm not
The most perceptive guy
Sometimes it takes a wink
Or a hand on the thigh
For me to even know
You know that I'm alive
I don't know
If you're being friendly
Or the kiss you blew
Means love me tenderly
How am I to know
To give a try?
Are you going to love me?
Are you going to leave me?
Or are you going
To have to take my keys?
Is it a yes?
Is it a no?
Girl, just give it
To me straight up
I don't think they're going to
have funeral attire here, Mike.
Yeah, well, anything
is better than that.
Oh, okay.
Well, I'll try to find
something nice.
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
Try to find something nice.
That's what you should be doing.
[Mike] And now we get to go all
the way back out to the desert.
What you got there?
What you got there?
Oh, it's Yasmeen's
treasure trunk.
It has my love inside.
I mean, this is just poems and
mementos and memories
from when we were together.
But the most important thing
is this.
Yeah. Wow.
Mike thinks it's crazy, but
she came to me in a dream.
She said,
"Return the ring to me.
We'll be together for eternity."
She said that I was the
one great love in her life.
You really loved her.
I'm sorry about your ex-wife.
Well-- well, she's
not alive anymore.
I'm sorry you had to
drive us around all day.
I'm sorry about the
whole raccoon thing.
I'm sorry he attacked you.
I'm sorry that we keep
saying sorry so much.
[Jason chuckles]
We are.
It's, like, sorry!
I said it again.
Thank you.
Thank you.
I have to get to a funeral
and Mike's probably
done taking a dump.
-Oh. It's just...
Because... Oh!
-Thank you.
Thank you.
Thank you.
[starting the car]
-Where are you at?
-[music from app]
Well, that felt good.
You get her number?
I did.
Says she wants to get coffee,
so you know what that means.
Hey, my phone works.
[phone ringing]
What, Mike?
[Mike] I know that from
your perspective, it looked
like I was running away.
And I was. I was running
away at first. But I was
going to come right back.
But when I was outside,
I see Jason. And I mean,
you should have seen him.
How is he?
Well, I mean, you
were right, you know.
He definitely needed
somebody. He needed me.
No, I didn't.
This is, this is a dumb
question, but I was...
While I've been gone
helping Jason, you
haven't been, like,
you didn't take the opportunity
to text other guys, right?
Excuse me?
That was a dumb
question. Admittedly.
That was a dumb question.
Are you seriously asking me
that question right now, Mike?
I've been out in the desert.
You wouldn't believe
what we've been through.
I wanted to call you right
away, but my phone died.
And that TRTL app I told
you about. Delete it off your
phone. It's not a good app.
-It is a bad app.
-You know what, Mike?
It nearly killed us.
I don't even know.
Honestly, I don't...
I truly don't expect you
to forgive me right away,
but, you know, I'm going
to ask you to look deep
down, because you know me.
-No, she doesn't.
-You know that's not what I
would do. That's not who I am.
She doesn't know you
at all. She doesn't know.
I know who you are.
-I'm sorry, can you--
-I know exactly who you are.
-Hold on a second, Shannon.
-[Jason] You're a liar.
[braking car]
I saw your phone.
Okay? I saw the pictures on your
phone. I saw the Lady Library.
I saw Yasmeen
in the Lady Library.
You knew about the bite marks.
You knew about them
the whole time. You
probably put them there.
-He knew about
the bite marks!
-Give me it.
Give me the-- she needs to know.
She needs to know!
You had sex with my wife.
How could you do that?
I loved her.
She didn't love you.
She didn't, Jason.
That's the whole point
I've been trying to tell you.
-She was terrible for you.
Get out. Get out. Out.
Get out of the car, right now!
-All right.
-Get out!
I'm sorry.
I don't care.
[opening can]
[Vaginia] Oh! Were you bad?

There was a time
We did everything together
Made our tea for two
- Just you and I
- There're no rules
in the desert.
There's no commitment
in the desert.
There's no pregnancy
in the desert.
What do you say, lost boy? You
want to join me in the desert?
Then you came
And knocked me down
Twist my sentences around
Where on earth
Am I supposed to be
I'm all alone
I can't believe
I was the last to know
You walked away
[music ends]
[buzzing sound]
[priest] Yasmeen was
a member of our community.
To her parents,
she was a daughter.
To her siblings,
she was a sibling.
To her doctor,
she was a patient.
To her bartender,
she was a customer.
And to all of us,
she was a friend.
Whom we loved dearly.
But that's not to say that
she lived an easy existence.
No, Yasmeen endured
hardships that many of
us have never had to face
in her short time with us.
Unhealthy relationships,
drug addiction,
chlamydia, gonorrhea,
a pregnancy scare.
It was about two years
ago when Yasmeen last
came to me for guidance.
She hadn't been to church
in quite some years
and wasn't sure if
she'd be welcomed back.
I told her that
with faith, prayer,
repentance and paying
her tithing in full,
she'd be welcomed back
to the church with open arms.
Sir, may I help you? Sir?
Oh no. Oh, no. Where's the ring?
Oh, shit.
-You forget something?
What are you doing here?
I'm bringing you
the ring. You forgot it.
Listen, that whole crazy
dream from Yasmeen?
I get it.
You should do
what it told you to do.
How did you get here?
Zannah. Again.
You should do the thing.
Excuse me.
Who are you?
LeBrawn. I'm her husband.
-Funeral home forgot
to put this on her.
No, no, no, no, no. Correction.
Her family never wanted
the ring on her finger.
[LeBrawn] She
divorced you, Rando.
It's Ramon Antonio
Sanchez to you!
-Who the hell are you?
-I'm her fianc.
She's married to me.
You're the one who let her OD.
She wouldn't have turned
to drugs if not for all
you clingy bitches.
-You killed her!
-I didn't kill shit.
Someone get a fire extinguisher!
I got it.

There was a time
We did everything together
Made our tea for two
Just you and I
I'm all alone
I can't believe
I was the last to know
You walked away
The first to feel the pain
I'm all alone
I can't believe
I was the last to know
You walked away
-Hey, Zannah.
[sobbing] Hey.
Mike called me.
He told me what happened,
so I drove him down here.
That's like a six-hour drive.
-It's fine.
-That's okay. I'm all right.
-I'm going to get out.
-It hurt.
-You okay?
-I'm okay.
you gave a crap
about Yasmeen. And
there's not a lot of stuff in
life that's truly crap worthy.
And well, I've decided
to move to LA.
-Oh, I-- you shouldn't
do that on my account.
-To be with my dad.
Oh, good. Good.
He has pancreatic cancer.
-Ah. Yeah.
-I know Mike has it,
but here's-- oh!
That has my phone number, if you
ever need anyone to talk to or
get emotional support.
Couch time.
Practice your music.
Frozen yogurt.
I play guitar.
Those all sound
really wonderful, but
I'm almost forty, I don't...
Oh, not for, not for
sex or stuff like that.
I thought we were
just flirting, right?
Wait, we were flirting?
The tension was palpable.
Anyways, um,
I was kind of hoping we could
continue this friendship.
Maybe get some
coffee or something when
we're both back in LA.
Time to go.
Oh. I'm sorry.
I have to go with this guy.
Call me or
shoot me an email,
but I didn't write my email
address on that paper.
-I'll text you.
You know I'm not twelve, right?
[radio noises]
I've been to worse funerals.
[radio chatter]
[woman] Let them go.
[Jason] Utah cops are
way more understanding
than I thought they'd be.
Shannon's pregnant.
With your...
Yeah. Yeah.
-Is that why you...
Uh, she told me and I panicked,
and it was a dick move.
I think you'll be a good dad.
I think I may have caught
a little bit of scoliosis.
-Probably all that driving
around in the car, cooped up.
Sharing germs.
You know, I think
I've decided, though.
I'm going to touch myself again.
Hey, all right.
Right now?
Honestly, though,
do you think I have a
chance of pulling this off?
Probably a better one
than I did with Yasmeen.
It's going to be awkward
up front, though.
She's going to be mad.
Yeah, kind of has
a right to be mad.
But you know what?
I'm just going to start talking.
I'm going to do it honestly.
I'm going to do it.
Also, I am sorry I blew
up Yasmeen's corpse.
I did make sure they
got the finger back.
Okay. Doing it.
-I'll see you.
All right. Good luck!
[Mike] Thank you.
[Jason] See you home.
Probably going to
have make-up sex.

There was a time
We did everything together
Made our tea for two
Just you and I
There was a time
We had a world
To show forever
Any storm out there
We'd weather
Just you and I
Then you came
And knocked me down
Twist my sentences around
Where on earth am I
Supposed to be
I'm all alone
I can't believe
I was the last to know
You walked away
First to feel the pain
I'm all alone
I can't believe
I was the last to know
You walked away
The first to feel the pain
I'm all alone
In my mind, I'm still
Swimming in the memories
Reaching out
For all that could be
Just you and I
Still you come
And knock me down
Lost all hope
And never found
Where on earth
Am I supposed to be
I'm all alone
I can't believe
I was the last to know
You walked away
The first to feel the pain
I'm all alone
I can't believe
I was the last to know
You walked away
The first to feel the pain
I'm all alone
I can't believe
I'm all alone
I can't believe
I'm all alone
I can't believe

[music ends]