Cactus Jack (2022) Movie Script
1
(ominous music)
(projector roaring)
(eerie music)
(door knocks)
(dog barking)
- [Sandberg] Hey man.
- [Ronald] So, you're the guy?
- [Sandberg] Oh, yeah.
- [Ronald] You're alone, right?
- [Sandberg] Yeah, yeah,
is it cool if I start filming now?
- No, when we get inside.
(door slams)
You're not gonna try to fuck me, are you?
- [Sandberg] No, no way,
man, not at all, no.
- All right,
all right good.
You know,
'cause people like to spin shit
and I
don't want you spinning my shit all around
making me look stupid or bad or anything.
- [Sandberg] No, no way, man,
no, I wouldn't, I wouldn't.
- All right, 'cause I wanna
look at all the footage
before you do anything with it,
I want, what do you fucking
call that in movies?
I want final cut.
- [Sandberg] Of course, man, all yours.
- All right, okay.
(footsteps clumping)
I cannot stress enough how important it is
that you do not try to fuck me.
(soft suspenseful music)
(footsteps clumping)
Well, I guess, set up wherever you want,
how do you wanna do this?
(epic suspenseful music)
So, what do I?
Do I talk to you, do I talk to the camera?
Am I supposed to look at it, what?
- [Sandberg] You can just talk to me,
let's just have a conversation.
- Just ignore the camera, faggot!
- [Sandberg] Yeah, fly on
the wall, fly on the wall.
- All right, let's go.
You fucking kike nigger, gook, cunt.
- [Sandberg] Why don't
you just say your name,
just tell us your name.
- Why?
Why does it matter?
- [Sandberg] I don't
know, I guess it doesn't,
it's just, you know, a name.
- Names don't mean shit.
You know how many aliases I've used
calling into radio shows?
Names don't matter,
it's what fucking someone
says and someone does
that fucking matters.
I hate my name, fuck my name.
Why are you here?
What are you after?
- [Sandberg] I thought you knew,
you know, our mothers both.
- Yeah, yeah, I get it.
Your mom has her head filled
with nonsense every Sunday
along with that incontinent
monstrosity of mine upstairs,
you heard about me, I get it,
but I mean what's your angle?
- [Sandberg] What, you mean for the doc?
I just thought it was really
interesting, you know,
that someone hasn't left
their basement in six months,
not even to use the
bathroom, is that true?
- Why would I wanna go out there?
A man's home is his castle.
I got everything I need right here.
What's out there for me?
- [Sandberg] I don't know,
other people?
- (scoffs) Other people, you
fucking kidding me, right?
What in the fucking would I
want or need other people for?
I'm my own man, I know how to
exist and thrive without aid.
That's what's wrong with society,
that's what's wrong with most people,
they're weak will pussies and parasites
who buy into that whole fucking
it takes a village bullshit,
'cause they can't stand
on their own fucking feet,
I stand on my own two feet.
- [Sandberg] Right?
It's obvious that I'm not trying to be,
man, don't get me wrong but like,
I'm just acknowledging that
and you, in fact, live
in your mom's basement.
- What?
No, no, no, no, no,
get it straight motherfucker,
this is my house,
my father left it to me,
he fucking despised her as much as I do.
It's only out of the
kindness of my own heart
that I let her stay here and trust me
every day I dream about throwing
her fat-ass to the wolves.
(wolves growling)
- [Sandberg] She is your
mother and on some level
you still love her, right?
- Love?
Fuck no, love.
Maybe 20 years ago I
would have thrown her out,
but I couldn't do it now, not even to her,
not with the roving pack of fucking niggas
and everything else that
moved in and took over.
This neighborhood, like every neighborhood
in every city in this goddamn
country has gone to shit.
Even my cunt mother doesn't deserve that.
Probably mercy kill her first.
(soft music)
- [Sandberg] Oh, okay, all right.
(Sandberg sighs)
How do you survive?
Don't you rely on her at all?
How do you make a living
or like eat and shit?
- I'm a miner.
I pan for gold in them nareos,
cryptocurrency motherfucker,
ever heard of it?
- [Sandberg] Okay, gotcha.
Like Bitcoin.
So, you have mining first
day like can gaze but
it's still engaging
society some way, right?
- I get where you're going with this kid,
don't.
Bet your ass I could survive in the wild,
I can kill, dress a deer,
I can fish, don't you worry about me,
I got every item and
every skill it'll take
when the time comes.
- [Sandberg] When not if,
you mean like Thursday like
it'll happen in a lifetime.
- Lifetime, it'll happen in
the next two fucking years.
We are weeks away from
this bullshit election and
I know you don't wanna hear this
but Donald Trump is gonna win the election
and then he's gonna take office and then,
might not happen
immediately but it's coming,
'cause those niggas get
more and more uppity
every fucking day, black lives matter
and all this other bullshit,
that is going to lead to the race war
that will end all race wars,
we have unfinished business.
(soft suspenseful music)
Civil War
was just the fucking beginning,
this shit's been brewing for decades.
- [Sandberg] Wow.
Not sure what to say there.
- What's the matter?
(Sandberg exhales)
(soft suspenseful music)
What did you think this was?
What did you think you were walking into?
Some fat slob playing video
games in his mom's basement?
You were gonna make your little movie
or a documentary exploiting him?
Wrong basement, homeboy, wrong guy.
(soft suspenseful music)
But you aren't going anywhere yet,
no matter how vile you think I am,
how fucked up and damaged
or misguided or evil,
you're in for the long
haul, you're hooked.
(soft suspenseful music)
I can see it in your eyes.
(soft suspenseful music)
- Oh, oh, so, I just got out of there
and this dude, he's (laughs)
he's a fucking trip.
He's the real deal I think, man,
I thought it was just
gonna be some fucking loser
like sitting in his basement
like playing into some
video games or some shit but
it's a fucking bunker down there (laughs),
and like, he's for real,
man, he's fucking serious,
and like fucking, he's like raw man.
He's like mining the real raw shit, man,
he's down in there
and so, I think if I
go down there and that
I'm willing to like, you know,
like listen to him like he's
a real human being there,
we can, you know,
there's something there
that we all need to learn
and you know, hear him and really
look past all the fucking (vomit)
and like see what's really wrong, man,
like, there's some like,
like, you know, there's
some disconnect there and
if I can find it, we can really,
like, or I can, well, yeah,
something's there and
now's the time to get in there and
like, show over the world, like
this fucking mole that
has buried himself in the fucking dirt,
you know and like,
I don't know.
Okay, this guy is,
he's, it's like pure hate, man,
this is like the drug of hate and like,
if we can just, kind of, figure out
how he's getting high off of
it, maybe we can start like,
pulling that shit back off of him, man.
It's hate that we're in a fucking high
and this dude is fucking hot
for that shit, daily (laughs),
and (Sandberg sighs)
can just like, you know,
chew it like a drug,
chew it like a drug and just
break through that shit,
figure it out, you know,
it's like a science project, you know?
It feels like, you got a science fair shit
and I'm gonna make it my
little project and you know,
figure this shit out.
What is hate?
Where does it come from?
Where does it go?
Yeah.
Right now it's fucking caged (laughs).
Nigga's fucking caged his
own head and just shaking it,
shaking his own fucking cage (laughs),
it's absurd.
Fucking absurd.
You're right,
you're not what I expected and I'm hooked.
Tell me more about these radio
shows you're calling into.
You wouldn't have any of
those tapes, would you?
- [Ronald] Oh, yeah, tons of them.
- [Gary] Hey, loyal listeners,
this is the Grind and Run with Steve.
Steven Richmond, tell me what's
grinding your gears tonight.
Steve, you there?
- [Ronald] I'm here.
You wanna know what grinds my gears, Gary?
Where to begin.
Let's start with the
swelling tide of blue blood
bleeding heart libtards
who bend over backwards to
apologize on behalf of Muslims
every time one of these rag heads
opens fire on innocent Americans.
Last month, it was Paris,
fine, I'm no fan of the French
and that's an ocean away on our TV screens
but last week, last,
last week, it was San Bernardino
back in our home turf in our own backyard,
this gutless camel jockey
and his worthless wife
killed 14 of my countrymen in cold blood,
how at a party for Christ's sake?
14 on the floor and today, today
on the anniversary of Pearl Harbor,
only Donald Trump
has the courage and conviction
to stand up and publicly
say what needs to be said
and these spineless waves
on the left, when crucified for it,
we're here safety, goddamn right,
we need to lock our
borders down yesterday.
We didn't learn our lesson in 93
when I was Osama bin Laden
took a shot at the Twin Towers,
we gave him a loose
leash and that dog bit.
when are we gonna wake the fuck up?
- [Gary] No, I'm sorry, Steve,
I'm thinking that we're laying down here
but we can't have that kind of language.
(soft suspenseful music)
(Steve sighs)
- [Ronald] When are we
gonna wake up and realize
that inclusive is what brought down Troy?
You let your guard down,
you have no one to blame but yourselves.
This is a failure of leadership
and it's no surprise
that Barack Hussein Obama
and his lame duck do nothing flunkies
let it happen over and
over and over again.
Seven years we went without an attack
since this great nation's
birthday in O two
until he took office and
then what did you get?
Little Rock, Fort Hood,
Boston Marathon, Chattanooga
and now the latest.
While he's spying on you
collecting your metadata,
what did it get you?
14 on the floor, that's what it gets you.
Well, it's time we put
our foot down, I say,
I'll be damned if it happens again,
not on my watch, not in my yard.
I am locked and I am loaded
and I am prepared to defend
myself and my own land
and every one of your
listeners better be too,
because it's not going to get any better
until we stand up and
say, enough is enough.
We're tired of these glass jaw apologies
on behalf of murderers.
We're sick of the crying
or the torture at Gitmo,
the greatest generation knew
better than to open that door.
Again, 73 years ago today,
we were attacked and what did we do?
We rounded those squeaky-eyed
sons of bitches up
and tossed them in camps,
and locked down the borders
to their kind, no entry.
That is the answer and say
what you want about the man,
but at least Trump has
the intestinal fortitude
to stand up and say what
needs to be said, no more!
We are at war.
For the first time since the 1700s,
a foreign enemy is attacking
us on our own soil,
what are you gonna do about it?
What are you going to do, Gary?
What are your listeners gonna do?
Lock and load.
I'm ready and I will not hesitate.
- [Gary] Are you advocating violence?
Steve, we can't...
- You're goddamn right I am.
Until the f nigga incharge
gets his nappy head out of his black ass,
I am fully prepared to kill and
to die to defend my country.
(radio buzzing)
(radio tuning)
This is a bedtime story I like
to call tranny faggot fox.
You want to know what gender you are,
reached down the front
of your fucking pants,
if you have an innie, you're a girl,
if you have an outie, you're a boy,
end of fucking story.
What other species of animal
dreams up this kind of preposterous shit?
A male lion is a male lion
regardless of how he feels.
Presume there's gonna be fucking urinals
in lady's room
just because some maladjusted, sicko fuck
got off on wearing mother's
lipstick and pearls
and never bothered to grow up,
it doesn't mean the rest
of us have to play along.
These fucking monstrosities,
sorry, but Bruce Caitlyn
Jenner is not brave
and if you think he/she is,
you're a fucking flaming faggot waterhead
liberal fucktard.
It's ridiculous, Jesus Christ!
Next thing you know,
niggas are gonna wanna start
using the same water fountains
as the rest of us.
Oh, wait, that slippery
slope is what led to this.
I've got a million more in here, man,
anytime you wanna hear,
anytime you wanna fucking hear it.
(soft suspenseful music)
This has got all the truth you need.
- [Sandberg] Okay, let's backtrack.
You never leave this
basement, so, tell me,
how do you spend all
that free time down here?
Can you like walk me
through, I don't know,
a day in the life of Ronald.
- I get up, morning faggots
and a special wakey, wakey eggs and Bakey
to all you niggas, immigrants and cunts.
(soft music)
I put my boots on,
it is a beautiful day in the neighborhood.
(soft music)
Could I be?
Might I be
your neighbor,
neighbor?
Let's go.
You want a day in the life?
First stop on our tour is this room
where my father blew off his fucking head
when I was 13 years old.
My old bedroom is located
directly above this room.
Stop number two is my mother's shit.
Like I told you, she was
allowed to be a teacher,
this is some of her shit from then.
(desk slams)
Over here is where I do my business.
I take the morning piss,
freshen up,
(water splashing)
wash my balls, shower, shit, shave,
get some water coffee,
maybe I'd do a little
light reading or writing
while I listen to radio.
Usually get in a little
workout before I eat,
pushups, swinging kettle
bell and some metrics.
Figure out what to eat.
I make everything a little fast,
cook it, eat it then play a little bass.
(bass guitar music)
(indistinct)
(bass guitar music)
- [Mother] Fucking
stop!
- Fuck you!
Oh, you wanna see something
really fucking cool?
(soft suspenseful music)
This is some of my dad's old shit.
(soft suspenseful music)
(table squeals)
(stool clatters)
You're gonna love this.
(table squeals)
(box gliding)
(hinges squeaking)
(soft suspenseful music)
4th of July was his favorite holiday.
He used to run around with these sparklers
wearing this Abraham Lincoln mask.
(Ronald inhales)
(soft suspenseful music)
(mask clatters)
This,
make sure you get this, man,
this is a real kicker.
(soft suspenseful music)
- [Sandberg] Oh, (exhales) fuck!
- Look at that.
- [Sandberg] Yeah, that's nice.
(soft suspenseful music)
- You got enough of this
bullshit reenactment garbage?
Who gives a fuck what I eat?
I have shit to say, man,
you wanna hear it or not?
Niggas have never shown
an aptitude for anything
but murder, theft, rape, slinging dope
and rioting every time a
good cop takes out the trash.
To shit on niggas
is not to dehumanize them,
(soft suspenseful music)
they aren't fucking human!
Faggot.
Faggot.
Faggot, faggot, fucking
faggot, fucking nigga, cunt.
You fucking kike dyke gook, faggot.
You don't get to own words
you fucking straw grasping pussies,
you cannot take them back,
they were never yours
to goddamn begin with.
You fucking people
do not even understand
the origins of these words
that you hold so dear.
All this harping
about slavery,
do you call horses slaves?
Do you call cows slaves?
Calling it slavery infers that
they are in some way equal
or even the same species,
stop it.
Remember that Congressman,
who the fuck was it?
Doesn't matter, I don't remember.
Anyway, the guy used the word niggardly
and he was fucking forced to resign.
Let me get this straight,
you can't even use a word that sounds
fucking phonetically similar
to one of these off
limits hate speech words.
40,000 years ago
the Caucasoids broke
off from the Mongolians,
whites are descended from
that brave renegade tribe.
A tribe of trailblazers
and conquers and pioneers,
that's how far it's gone.
They're keeping score at home, man.
Niggardly means to hate
spending money or to be cheap,
like, you know,
a fucking mealy mouth Jew.
We moved to colder
climates, we crossed oceans,
we tamed new wilds, domesticated animals,
mastered metallurgy.
We fucking evolved
while the African Mongoloid
stayed the same pathetic
primitive creature it always was.
You know the entomology
of the word faggot, dude?
No one knows this,
even faggots don't fucking know this,
it's old English,
it means a bundle of sticks.
Why do we bring them out of Africa?
Why didn't we just leave them there?
Because there was a time that whites,
before we got addicted to guilt,
could see niggas for what
they really are, cattle.
Dogs and wolves can
fuck and make offspring
but let's understand and recognize
that that does not make
them the same species,
so, don't give me fucking
mulattoes and half-breeds
as some kind of evidence
that were the same.
Did some slave owners fuck their
niggas out by the woodshed?
Of course,
same as Australians fuck sheep.
You asked me, Jefferson was
a fucking beast Opheliac.
This country put a goddamn
cattle fucker on a coin,
chew on that cud, homeboy.
Now, the fucking cry baby faggots
and trannies and everybody
they'll have you believing
that it's some bigoted thing
about burning faggots at the stake
with the sticks, ever the victim, right?
Bullshit.
Or they'll tell you it's
about a bundle of sticks
being representative of fucking what?
Like all the dicks, all together
like in a fucking gay nightclub.
And don't give me melanin either,
it's not just color, man,
it's not just pigment,
this shit is phenotypic.
Kinky nappy fucking hair, ashy skin
flared animal nostrils,
a propensity for mindless
animal violence, sickle cell,
the big nigga asses, it's
a high hip to waist ratio.
Their prognostic jaws,
their big fucking blunt sucking lips,
their long monkey arms
and soulless idiot eyes,
don't give me human.
You see,
faggot
started as a derogation of women.
We referred to them as a burden,
like, oh, I don't know, a
bundle of wood, useless,
they don't carry their own fucking weight,
they are baggage that
we have to haul around
while we get shit done, see.
It takes an average IQ of 90
to run a technological nation
and that's why Africa is still
goddamn jungles and deserts
and why they still carry their water
in woven baskets on
their empty monkey heads.
They have all the goddamn resources,
coltan, lithium, cassiterite,
they're sitting on a fucking goldmine
and they're too stupid to realize it,
meanwhile, China's swoops in
and suck some dry for
fucking custodial gigs,
it's a disgrace.
So get over yourselves
you fucking fairies,
you're just annoying
little limp wristed nats.
No one gives a shit if you live or die,
so, shut the fuck up,
enjoy your AIDS in peace
so, the rest of us can
get on with our existence.
Enough with the parades
and the rainbow flags.
You are a nuisance, not a course.
In reference, I wish that
cunt would shut the fuck up.
Keep rolling, fuck this,
fuck it, I'm not done.
The framers figured it out,
they gave them three fifths,
you are three fifths of a
fucking person, that's it,
and that was generous.
This woman cannot shut the
fuck up, you hear this?
One of this days you're
gonna show up here and
you're gonna help me bury a fucking body.
They had it right back then,
that's what I call a faggot,
useless, in the way, too much work,
a suck on society and fucking decency.
It's not just faggots,
queers and trainees that
are faggots by the way,
women are faggots, feminists are faggots,
niggas are faggots,
welfare queens are faggots,
crack babies are faggots,
the police are faggots,
priests are faggots, finger
fucked alter boys are faggots,
politicians are faggots,
the school board are faggots,
teachers are fucking faggots,
hedge funders are faggots,
the toothless fuck trying
to get a dollar out of me
at the gas station is a faggot.
border hopping, job deeps are faggots,
the weak stupid earth worshipers
who couldn't stop us from
stealing their land, faggots.
Refugees are faggots, retards are faggots,
kike speaks slopes are fucking faggots.
The French, total white
flag-waving faggots
Muhammad and Jesus,
circle jerking faggots.
Camel jockey, ISIS, terrorists,
fuck some faggots, and
last but not least
white liberal fucking faggots,
you do deserve to be burned at the stake.
Race traitor faggots.
(upbeat suspenseful music)
He used to love wearing
these fucking rings.
Oh, my God, he was,
I think it's 'cause he couldn't
wear them like when he was working
'cause he was an electrician, you know?
So, he would get a finger blown off
if he was wearing all this metal
but he used to walk around.
He used to fucking walk around
with like three of these
things on like this
and he'd go down to the liquor store
and he'd go and get his fucking gin and
sit there.
These rings on all of them.
My old man was smart,
was rash,
a tinker, an electrician.
He was very scientific,
he had a very logical
approach to everything.
Everything was schematics and
flow charts so, you could,
you can actually believe
everything he said,
it all made sense, but he wasn't perfect.
- [Sandberg] How do you mean?
(soft suspenseful music)
- He was weak?
- [Sandberg] How so?
(soft suspenseful music)
- He always took the easy way out,
always compromised.
- [Sandberg] You think
compromise makes you weak?
(soft suspenseful music)
- No, it doesn't make you weak,
it's a sign you're weak, a symptom,
another is attempting to escape reality.
You don't run from reality and
you don't make deals with it,
you put its teeth on the curve
and shape it with the downward
thrust of your fucking heel.
My old man ran from everything.
He ran from that fat fucking
idiot harpy nag upstairs,
he hid down here in his fucking workshop.
A grown,
a grown man hiding.
(soft suspenseful music)
He ran from society
when it started prioritizing
handouts to niggas and illegals
over rewarding hardworking Americans,
he ran from his fucking
responsibilities with a boozy
and he ran for reality
like a fucking head in the
sand libtard kami faggot
when he put a bullet in his brain,
this one.
(soft suspenseful music)
He was wearing this one when he did it.
You see that right there,
you're getting that where it's cut,
that's what they do when
they have to cut a ring
off of someone's dead body,
he was wearing this one.
(soft suspenseful music)
I don't know why I hate them,
look at all these rings, son.
(soft suspenseful music)
(rings clattering)
- [Sandberg] Are you different?
You're not hiding down here
like you said he did but.
- You think I'm hiding down here?
(soft suspenseful music)
I'm not hiding, yet, I'm biding my time.
(soft suspenseful music)
- [Sandberg] You're gonna
shape your own reality
from down here?
- Oh, yeah.
- I got big things in store,
don't you worry about me.
What do you think I am glad
like some afraid of them,
you think I'm fucking scared?
Oh, contraire, motherfucker,
they need to be afraid to me.
I don't go out there because
it turns my fucking stomach,
it disgusts me.
Fucking faggots making out in
the street in broad day light,
race traitors and niggas
fucking holding hands,
making fucking mutant babies.
Loud mouth cunts
constantly bitching and
moaning about equality
while men hold doors
open and buy them meals
and let them off with fucking warnings
instead of speeding tickets.
Spineless,
cock social justice retards
turning every fucking
word in the dictionary
into a goddamn landmine.
No,
they should consider themselves lucky.
(soft suspenseful music)
Next time I go out there, you
better watch your fucking six
and batten down the fucking hatches,
'cause I'm coming out guns blazing.
(soft suspenseful music)
- [Sandberg] Was this a violent
household you grew up in?
- What, physically?
No.
I'd have killed them
in their fucking sleep.
- [Sandberg] Emotionally?
- Man, she's a fucking nightmare.
Look at this shit.
This
is basically the inside of her head.
All cotton brain fucking
button-eyed idiocy,
fake fucking flowers,
dust covered little kid shit.
She's a child,
a fat piss-dripping Jesus-loving child
with her trinkets and her
fucking figurines and shit,
watch it, watch it.
(soft suspenseful music)
She will be yelling down any day now.
Listen, fucking October
for me to set up the fucking
Christmas tree, mark by words.
What's emotional abuse, anyway?
Pussy faggot shit, excuses to fail,
to hand over power.
She wasn't abusive,
she's just a fat fucking nag
who will drive you to kill
yourself if you let her.
- [Sandberg] You really
do hate your own mother,
don't you?
- I mean,
she's a woman,
(soft suspenseful music)
why wouldn't I?
(epic suspenseful music)
- [Host] We're on with Jack,
Jack in Dearborn, what's on your mind?
- [Ronald] You're not gonna like it.
- [Host] Try me.
(soft suspenseful music)
(Ronald sighs)
- [Ronald] I've had it
up to my goddamn gills
with the systematic
feminization of this country.
- [Host] Ooh, this should
be good, buckle up folks.
- [Ronald] There you go.
More condescension, surprise, surprise.
I can't watch the news these
days without some commercial
giving us this pathetic dumbed-down
purse-holding lug of a husband
and his all knowing suburban Oracle wife
to make the fallacious point,
that we men don't know
or care about anything
beyond beer or breasts
and only Athena herself
can make the decision to
choose the right minivan
or laundry detergent or goddamn
snack chip for the family.
We men who incidentally
brought you everything,
from fire to farming, from
the compass to the cotton gin,
steam engine and electricity
and the light bulb and
refrigeration and...
- [Host] War and slavery
and rape, don't forget rape.
I mean you even do it to each other
when we don't let you near us anymore.
- [Ronald] I am talking here.
- [Host] My, my, are
we a prickly one, Jack?
(Ronald laughs)
- [Ronald] Lady, you
don't know that half of it
and I'm not alone,
you think we don't
understand what this is?
I'm with her, I could fucking puke.
- [Host] Language, strike one.
- [Ronald] Hate to break
it to you, sweetheart,
but it's time to reconcile.
Dom loves the country over
are waking up to the rules.
We know they're spoonfeeding
us, Hillary Clinton.
- [Host] Not the nefarious
they and who would they be?
The NSNBC, CNN (gasps)
Better Homes and Gardens?
- Please,
I'm talking Bohemian Grove,
the Bilderbergs and the Rothschilds.
- [Host] All three?
- [Ronald] Open your eyes.
Power's already been consolidated,
it's all hold'em to them now.
It's been the slow play
years in the making
and we're coming up on the river,
but lo and behold along
comes this articulate black
to upset the applecart.
Libtards and social justice faggots
fall all over themselves
to signal their most virtuous of virtues
and elect car-baby Berry Hussein to what?
Right the wrong of slavery?
But we're right back on
schedule now, aren't we?
Spent the last 20 years
portraying women as the most
reasonable and measured
and presidential of people
because you creatures are so known
for tempering your emotions
and making rational decisions,
meanwhile, making men out to
be dead weight, the buffoons,
the butt of the joke.
- [Host] Oh, I think you gentlemen
do a pretty bang up job on that.
- [Ronald] Do you wanna know what I think?
I think you are overpaid
at 70 cents on the dollar.
I think you are weak and
inferior and I think you know it.
You don't see any couches
in the men's room bitch.
- [Host] Case in point.
- [Ronald] You wanna get real?
Let's get real.
On top of being the buffoon,
now we don't even get
to be the strong ones.
This is the emasculation
I'm talking about.
Now, we get, men could never
handle the pain of childbirth.
Well, riddle me this, bad girl,
if you women are so tough
and can take pain so well,
how come I'm not allowed
to punch you in the face
once in a while, when you run
your clueless whore mouth?
- [Host] Okay, this little
gel sting match has been fun.
- [Ronald] When Trump wins this election,
you'll have no one to
blame but yourselves.
Blow back, baby, you earned it.
Stop shoving chivalry
down our goddamn throat,
stop voting with your snatches
and maybe we'll let you stay
when we kick these goddamn
rag heads out of the country.
(phone disconnects)
- [Host] Jesus!
Someone get that guy a Thorazine.
I mean, I need to scrub that one off of me
so, I'm gonna go lie down on
that couch in the ladies room
to decompress for a moment,
but before I leave you with
a word from our sponsors,
if any of you plan to call
in and behave like that,
to talk over me and
scream and yell, don't.
Don't call here, ever.
Don't call anyone, get your own damn show
if you think you've got that much to say.
(epic suspenseful music)
(soft suspenseful music)
- [Ronald] Come on in, get in here.
Now, how you like that fucker?
- Are you ready for me today?
- Huh, yeah, I'm ready for you today.
I went to real school.
- Did you go to school?
- Come on, it's how you like it?
You liked this?
- Is that an eight millimeter?
- Yeah, it's an eight millimeter.
- I like it, it's a nice
camera, I have one like that.
I can get it to work for you.
- What's your name?
- [Ronald] (chuckles) Dude,
we've met like five times.
- What's your name?
You don't like that shit, do you?
(Sandberg sighs)
Names are important, remember?
- [Sandberg] My name is Chris.
I like long walks on the beach.
- Yeah, Chris what?
- Sandberg.
- [Ronald] Sandberg,
what, you a fucking Jew?
- No.
- [Ronald] I'm sure as hell
isn't Irish, what is it?
You probably a half kike, right?
Tell me about your mother,
how do you get along with your mother?
- She's great,
- Come on,
let's get on this side.
- We really Mahjong
I guess, in the park together.
- [Ronald] You play Mahjong with your mom?
- No, I don't.
- Yeah?
- No.
- It's your old man alive?
- Yeah, he's alive.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
- [Ronald] Does he hate
your fucking mother too?
- Probably.
- Yeah?
- They're divorced.
- So,
how does this feel having
a camera in your face?
Start talking, talk.
- This feels all right.
- Tell me what you think,
how do you feel about niggas?
You like niggas?
- No, never.
- Huh?
No, you don't?
- I mean.
- [Ronald] Then why are you so shocked
when I tell you the truth about them?
You need to grow up, kid?
- They never mess with me man.
- You need to grow the fuck up
- They ain't never messed with you.
Ah, that's sweet, that's sweet.
- No, they're generally, I like their,
some of their music is good.
- They?
What do you mean, they, who's they?
Who's they?
- The black peoples.
- The black people, okay.
- Yes.
The peoples that make up for
us in this country anything.
- [Ronald] Yeah, you
think women should have...
- I'm all in on you, man.
- You think women should have
an equal share?
You think women should have equal share?
You tiki wheel grilling
me about that shit before.
- Well, yeah.
- Huh?
Yeah?
- Yeah.
I've met some smart women.
- No, you haven't,
no, you fucking haven't.
- What about?
- [Ronald] That's pussy liberal talk shit.
- I'm trying to stay impartial.
- Yeah, why?
- Yeah, I...
'Cause.
- Why?
Life's not about impartial, we are at war.
So, Chris the Jew, when
you think about Muslims?
What do think about niggas?
- I don't know if
I've ever really talked to a Muslim.
- [Ronald] What do you think about niggas?
- They're great.
- Yeah,
what do you think about, they're great?
- No, I mean.
- If you need cotton picked
they're great,
or if you wanna watch a
fucking basketball game,
they're great.
- What do you want me to say?
- [Ronald] Why don't you say how you feel,
I want you to step up and be a fucking man
and tell me what you think of niggas.
- Well, right now I'm feeling a little,
(Sandberg sighs)
I think,
maybe I'll come back another day.
- Yeah?
- How about I'll just,
can you just?
- Yeah?
What do you think of Mexicans?
- I love Mexican food.
- [Ronald] You love Mexican
food so they can cook for you.
So, you'll get your cotton picked,
you'll get your food made.
(soft suspenseful music)
What do you think about niggas?
Be honest,
be honest.
Don't say what you're supposed
to fucking say, be honest.
- I am scared.
- Of niggas?
- No.
I mean, you got like 50.
- I was telling the truth,
what?
- How many guns you got downstairs, man?
You're blocking the exit here, man,
like, what do you want me to say?
' Cause...
- [Ronald] I want you to man
up and say what you think.
- And all the while,
you're putting me in
a weird position, man.
I didn't do this to you.
- You must be
some kind of mom, boy.
Probably suckled that tit
till you were like fucking 11.
- [Sandberg] Ah,
wait, what?
- Just your utter disbelief
that I could hate my mother,
that anyone could hate their mother,
like any two fucktards
with a cock and pussy
can't make a fucking baby.
Like it's inconceivable to you that
just because I came out of
her greasy stupid snatch
and I would wanna gouge
her fucking eyes out
and shut the life out of her someday,
that's a story as always time, man,
that's fucking arastes.
You don't get it, your mother's annoying?
Good for you,
that monster of mine up there,
she's a fucking rattlesnake.
Okay.
(chuckles) All right.
Here's a little insight for you.
I cannot count how many times
I came home as a kid
(soft suspenseful music)
to find her
laying there on the couch
or on the bed or the floor,
eyes wide open but still
as death, not breathing,
maybe a pill bottle
open and scattered on the
floor, maybe some other prop.
(soft suspenseful music)
I would go to her and shake her and
I'd start to cry and then,
you know, only after she got me to cry,
she fucking double over laughing
that fucking cackling
jackal laugh of her is just,
I got you, I got you.
(soft suspenseful music)
She pulled that shit
countless times,
just got to the point that if
I saw her laid out like that,
I would just walk right fucking by her
(soft suspenseful music)
hoping that it was true for once
and that I would be done with her,
and trust me, man,
that is just the tip in the
fucking iceberg with her,
don't fall for her diary
old church lady routine,
she is an evil cunt.
Stick around long and you'll see.
(soft suspenseful music)
You know what I like to do sometimes?
(soft suspenseful music)
(gun clicks)
I like to lock and load
and trace her when she walks around.
(soft suspenseful music)
(footsteps clumping)
Oh, she's going onto the sink,
(soft suspenseful music)
(footsteps clumping)
to the bathroom.
(footsteps clumping)
(soft suspenseful music)
Got you.
(footsteps clumping)
(soft suspenseful music)
She's coming this way.
This is where it gets fun.
There she comes, right above us
and then she's gonna sleep in the bed.
(footsteps clumping)
(soft suspenseful music)
(Ronald laughs)
(soft suspenseful music)
One of these fucking days, man.
(soft suspenseful music)
(footsteps clumping)
- (sighs) Okay.
This guy is a fucking animal
and he's got himself (exhales)
he's got himself on a leash
and he's fucking gnawing at it
and he's itching,
he's itching to get off
of that fucking leash
and he's gonna fucking
kill some people, man,
and I'm gonna be first, so, if I'm gone,
you'll fucking know why.
So, if you find this
phone somewhere (exhales)
I probably won't be far.
Fuck.
- [Mother] Oh, who's that?
Kathy's boy, your little friend?
He's a loser like you,
the both of you, worse...
- Fuck you!
- [Mother] Why are you making
a movie about him anyway?
What's so special about my loser cunt?
- Cunt?
- It's not a good time, man,
I can...
- No, no, fuck her,
let's go.
- Fuck me?
Fuck you you ungrateful (indistinct).
Why can't you get a job,
like (indistinct) job.
(coughs) 'Cause you're
a loser, that's why.
What an excuse of a man,
look at you, look at him.
(soft suspenseful music)
(mother tapping)
I ask one thing,
I ask one thing, you can't even
bring up the Christmas tree.
- It's fucking October!
- Losers!
You can't even help your
own mother, his own mother.
- My, god (chuckles).
(mother tapping)
- [Mother] Both of you, losers,
a span of losers.
(soft suspenseful music)
- I'm fucking going to her.
(indistinct)
You know what?
Shut the fuck up!
(mother tapping)
(Ronald grunts)
(metal banging)
(cabinet clatters)
Oh,
fuck!
(Ronald grunts)
(indistinct)
Shit!
- [Mother] Never!
Never a job traveling out in the world
(indistinct)
(Ronald pants)
I'll show you, huh!
(Ronald panting)
(mother tapping)
It's no wonder no one loves you,
why no woman ever wanted you.
Look at you, you low life.
You have sired yourself nothing.
How do you get married
in a fucking basement
with the spiders and the rats?
That's where you belong like a moron
hiding from the world
just like your father,
your moron father!
(indistinct)
- Shit!
That's not very nice.
- Submitting like a coward.
(indistinct)
(soft suspenseful music)
- Is it going to have to give
to get in somewhere right now?
- [Mother] No one likes you.
You hate me, I hate you!
I hated you since I birthed you,
I hated you from the moment you were born.
I couldn't wait to get you out of me,
I wish you were stillborn.
I wish you could have died
and it wasn't just me,
your father hated you, he was
ashamed of you we both were.
Shame on you...
- I'm gonna fucking
shut her up for good.
- Shame on you (indistinct).
- [Sandberg] Dude, dude!
Pun it down.
Stop, man, stop, don't do it man, fuck,
put it down, stop, man, stop!
Don't do this, it's not
fucking worth it, man.
- [Ronald] Die!
(gun fires)
- [Sandberg] Oh, shit,
stop, man, stop, would you?
(Ronald panting)
Oh, fuck!
I didn't see shit, man.
- [Ronald] Come here!
(camera clatters)
- [Sandberg] No, don't
Tommy, I'm so sorry.
- [Ronald] Who are you?
- [Sandberg] I can drive, run, man,
You know, I would, (panting),
you could just take the footage, man,
you can just take it all, I'm just gonna,
I'm just gonna head out, man,
just keep all this shit,
man, I was never here.
You know, I never saw shit.
I didn't see shit, man.
- But you did.
- [Sandberg] No, fuck, no!
(thumps)
(body thuds)
(clattering)
(footsteps clumping)
(Ronald sighs)
- My, my, what have we here?
You're mine now shit birds.
(machine roars)
(saw grinding)
(man coughs)
(man vomits)
(saw grinding)
Nice little church lady,
Christopher's saying...
(man coughs)
We're just talking to you
and now what are you
doing, what are you doing?
Say it, look at the
fucking camera and say it.
- No.
- You are cutting her arm
(man sobs)
to cover your tracks,
you say that, fuck.
(man sobs)
(man coughs)
(man groans)
- Let me out of here.
- Nope.
Sorry, kid.
I'm not done with you just yet.
- Just let me out of here.
- [Ronald] As long as I haven't figured
all the fucking shit you were shooting.
- No.
- You think I'm
your little project?
- No.
- A libtard, a faggot?
Piece of shit.
You are mine.
little project you rat, fuck.
(soft suspenseful music)
(machine buzzing)
- I didn't do anything,
I didn't do anything.
(sobs) Just let me go, please, stop.
No, no, no (indistinct)
fuck you, fuck you.
(man screams)
(soft suspenseful music)
- Smile, faggot,
you're on candid camera.
(soft suspenseful music)
(machine buzzing)
(epic suspenseful music)
Wake up slave.
(soft suspenseful music)
Imagine that's the worst thing you do.
(soft suspenseful music)
(camera clicks)
Go on, pick it up.
(soft suspenseful music)
Up here, Spielberg, on me.
We're gonna show them the life you live.
We're gonna change the world.
(soft suspenseful music)
(Sandberg exhales)
(cable clips)
(soft suspenseful music)
(Sandberg coughs)
Spielberg, pan up.
(Sandberg coughs)
- There's no pan to tilt up.
- Shut the fuck up,
you know what I want, tilt it up then.
Get this, make sure you can get all this.
(soft suspenseful music)
(machine buzzing)
Make sure you get all of this.
(machine roars)
You guys are gonna love this shit.
(machine roars)
(epic suspenseful music)
(soft suspenseful music)
This is Cactus Jack coming to you live
from a studio audience.
(audience applauds)
hallo, fucktards.
(bright epic music)
(audience applauds)
(bomb explodes)
Moment of truth, libtards,
time to point out
today's hypocrisy namely,
how you nutless cocks
constantly preach
inclusivity on the one hand
with your endorsements
of racial desegregation
and co-mingling to the point
of populating the planet
with meat and half-breeds of every stripe
and then engaging your
misguided half-assed
white savior dances with
niggas identity politics act
that throws around bullshit terms
like cultural appropriation
and cultural heritage.
One day you say we should
all fuck each other
until everyone is a
light butterscotch brown
and racism is relegated a
relic of the barbaric past,
and then the very next day, if not minute,
you're talking out of the other side
of your week, white guilt mouths
about how darkies should be allowed
to take the California achievement
test in fucking Bionics
or Spanglish or fucking clicks and worlds
or whatever other mongrel
language is the flavor of the day.
You make a protective
species of these shit stains
but then deny me my right
to pride in my own race.
You'd give them a month where
we get Frederick Douglas
and Dr. King and what the fuck
was he a doctor of anyway?
Adultery?
And that tar baby raising
that Harriet Tubman
crammed down our throats and say,
the other 11 months are white
history months, bullshit!
There is no more reviled figure
in the country these days
than the white male, thanks
to you race traitors,
and you wonder why these
cornered animals lash out
and shoot up their schools
and movie theaters,
it's because every white
girl has been brainwashed
by MTV and BET to think Moon crickets
where a third grade reading
level are their ideal mates.
And on top of it, they're
told that the greatest ill
on society is what they are,
not the droves niggas
shoplifting and boosting cars
and killing each other in Chicago,
it's Brad in the burbs.
Go to the fucking program,
you don't get to draw lines in the sand
and then fucking straddle them,
pick a fucking side because it's too late.
You know damn well
when the war comes, we
are locked and loaded
and ready to take this
country back with fire
and righteous fucking fury jackass.
(gun bangs)
(upbeat suspenseful music)
(Ronald claps)
Wake up.
(soft suspenseful music)
(Sandberg crying)
God!
- No.
(belt whips)
(Sandberg crying)
(bright epic music)
(bomb explodes)
- Let's talk about Flint, shall we?
A democratic stronghold.
Birthplace of that incontinent
whining whale, Michael Moore,
and they've got more lead in their pipes
that Robby the fucking robot.
These liberal skunks are
the personification of evil.
They pander to the
uneducated and impoverished,
tell them they'll save them, prop them up,
and bolden them to reach new heights
and grasp hold of the American dream,
all the while, poisoning our water,
poisoning our children's minds
and brainwashing fucking
public schools boards,
poisoning the media, it's all poison.
Look alive, faggot.
(water splashing)
(soft suspenseful music)
Get it all, that's all you get
there you go,
there you go.
Oh, I bet that feels good.
I bet you are starving,
come on, do you want some beans?
You want some beans?
(soft suspenseful music)
(Sandberg panting)
(Ronald spitting)
(soft suspenseful music)
(spoon clatters)
(fist thumps)
(soft suspenseful music)
Here's what you do with Baltimore,
you put a wall around it
and you let the Silverbacks
tear each other apart,
end of story.
When they're done, we turn
it into a parking lot.
Parking problem solved,
monkey problem solved,
you're welcome America.
(bright epic music)
That's right, folks, today
we're talking victim braining.
(bright soft music)
Remember, the only thing that
stops a bad guy with a gun
is a badder guy with a bigger gun,
be the badder guy, be
a warrior, be the wolf.
I'm an Islamophobe the same way
a battered, abused woman
would be afraid of the guy
who punched her in the fucking mouth.
Do you call cows slaves?
Calling niggas slaves infers
that they're equal in some way
or the same species,
stop it, Jack out, Jack out, Jack out.
(upbeat suspenseful music)
(whipping)
(Sandberg crying)
(soft suspenseful music)
- Another basement ball
buster all by himself,
mommy's upstairs cooking
your fucking cream of wheat.
- This motherfucker sits around
with this Nazi flags and paraphernalia.
(people chattering)
- I hope
you find out who this
guy is and shut him down.
(people chattering)
(soft suspenseful music)
- These niggas and these goddamn kikes
think they run this goddamn fucking world.
Look at where we are.
(soft suspenseful music)
Look.
I got the guns,
the dogs,
I got everything I need.
(soft suspenseful music)
Fuck this goddamn 'cause
y'all gotta fucking figure this shit out.
I understand the kikes
rule the fucking money
(soft suspenseful music)
and the goddamn niggas think
they're owed something,
(soft suspenseful music)
we don't owe them nothing.
Stupid niggas.
(bright epic music)
- I read your comments shit birds,
I see all your hurled insults,
your lame virtue signaling
and pathetic posturing,
you decry me as a racist,
a textbook example of the
pot calling the nigger black
as I've ever seen,
without having the fucking balls to admit
you're no different than
me, shut the fuck up,
be a man and admit that a
nigga is a lower life form
and a tranny is a fucking
mentally ill faggot
and all the rest of the universal truths
you're too much of a fucking
brown nose punk bitch
to say it out loud,
fuck you, grow a pair.
This is a call to arms,
put these monkeys and sand niggas
and border hoping Mexican narco shitbergs
down before they overrun the place.
This is a responsibility,
lock and load like warriors.
- Jack, you're gonna love this.
So, this nigga,
he come running up,
(soft suspenseful music)
we come running up,
(soft suspenseful music)
we put a 45 to his motherfucking head
(soft suspenseful music)
and he bloody stomped
on his goddamn fingers.
(soft suspenseful music)
That nigga fell (laughs)
and he fell,
(soft suspenseful music)
fell hard,
28 feet.
(soft suspenseful music)
Watched that motherfucker fall,
(soft suspenseful music)
he didn't give up,
(soft suspenseful music)
I put a 45 through his fucking head
and that stupid nigga didn't
have a goddamn chance,
all he tried to do was hold on,
it's all he's trying to do
as we sat there and laughed.
(soft suspenseful music)
Fucking awesome.
(soft suspenseful music)
I pulled the trigger on
that motherfuckers head
and that
is how
he fell.
(soft music)
- Look at me,
look at me!
(soft suspenseful music)
Look at me!
(soft suspenseful music)
Welcome to bootcamp.
(fist thumps)
Yes, the cactus Jack
show has been canceled.
However, it's been replaced
by a fine mid season replacement,
ladies and gentlemen,
get ready for the hottest
new game show around,
Wheel of Torture.
(audience applauds)
Our contestant today is Chris,
a half kike and a faggot
from Fayetteville, North Carolina.
Chris, it's great to have you as always,
let's give the wheel a spin.
(bright epic music)
I said let's give the wheel a spin.
(bright epic music)
(wheel clicks)
(bright epic music)
Let's give that wheel a spin
and goes all round and round she goes,
where she stops, nobody knows.
Oh, it's one of my personal favorites,
it's why you're acting the way you are,
it's a little more liquid wrench.
You know what to do, kid,
(bright epic music)
breathe it in.
Breathe it in.
Oh.
Oh, there you go.
The crowd goes wild.
(audience applauding)
(bright epic music)
(wheel rattling)
Oh, and blame it on drink piss,
always a favorite of mine, come on, Chris,
drink that piss.
Drink it.
(soft suspenseful music)
Drink it, drink it!
(soft suspenseful music)
Drink it, all of it, drink it.
(piss splashing)
(Sandberg coughs)
Drink it!
(soft suspenseful music)
Yeah, yeah.
(liquid burbles)
(Sandberg buffs)
Oh, fuck, yeah.
(liquid burbles)
(soft suspenseful music)
Fuck yeah.
Yeah, drink it.
Well, Chris, you've
span another wild card,
you know what that means, waterboarding,
always a crowd favorite.
Oh, yeah, drinking this,
you like it, you like it.
(water spilling)
(Sandberg pants)
For fucking spilled you, Chris, come on.
On bowels, you know
what that means, Chris,
now, breathe through your nose,
breath through your nose,
suck it and suck it,
suck it.
(bright epic music)
(wheel clicks)
(soft suspenseful music)
(bright epic music)
Close your eyes, close your eyes.
Yeah.
So, look at you.
You are gonna be so
fucking raw, yeah, raw.
(soft suspenseful music)
There you go, yeah, fight (indistinct).
Fuck!
Mother!
Still, with your eyes closed.
Yeah, let me see (laughs).
You're gonna love what comes next.
(soft suspenseful music)
You don't have to talk
(Ronald laughs)
That's it.
Come on, baby, you're
showing a little part.
(soft suspenseful music)
Look at the camera, look at the cameras.
The camera next to you, kid.
(epic suspenseful music)
(bright epic music)
(bomb explodes)
Your sham election is a week away,
the noise is unbearable.
(siren wailing)
The frenzy hubris of the left,
they have somehow convinced themselves
Hillary Clinton is going to win.
(buzzer beeps)
(audience laughing)
They believe the average
able minded American
wants that goddamn meat
puppet for a figure head,
that lying duplicitous
ladder climbing cunt.
This old bag can't even stand up straight
without some Bilderberg fist up her ass,
like literally, she's falling
all over the goddamn place
hitting her head left and right,
forgetting which way she's waffled
and every fucking policy
just flip flopped over
in her dog shit career,
and you want this geriatric
power monger matriarch
as your leader, what?
Because she has a fucking
moth balled sausage wallet
and a bottle of Louisiana hot
sauce and a designer purse?
This bitch isn't even a fucking woman,
she's a robot programmed by cockroaches.
If she was a real woman
Bill wouldn't have resorted
to porking miss piggy with
a Cuban in the oval office,
(audience laughing)
She'd have satisfied him.
She'd take a step back and
realize that a strong woman
isn't one who wants to be seen or heard,
but no, she and her flock
unfuckable Kathleen heartbeats
with their stupid cunt brains
and their cunt faces, cunt voices,
put their cankle hamhocks to the pavement
and march for their pig queen
all because Donald Trump
has the balls to talk
like a real fucking man.
- Grabbed by the pussy,
that was locker room talk.
- Grow up,
face reality, play to
your strengths ladies
'cause leadership sure is shit, ain't it?.
Look at the children,
we're raising monsters
because these women are more
concerned with being heard
than rearing responsible
well-adjusted free-thinking people
you're teaching the
entitlement you dark cunts.
Get the fuck back in the kitchen.
Most of you idiots can't
even boil fucking water
let alone change an oil filter.
You're use less,
all you're good for is
marching and moaning,
this needs to end.
This whole movement needs to end
and if she's their figure head,
she needs to end too.
(soft suspenseful music)
Maybe that's it.
Maybe one of you out there
listening is man enough.
(gun firing)
Sacrifice himself
to restore order.
I'd do it myself but I'm needed here,
speaking to truth as aunt
Jamaima Oprah would say.
But one of you,
I know you're out there listening,
you're on the wavelength,
it's buzzing in your ears
burrowing into your brain.
It's not a task or a
chore, it's a mission,
a hero's journey.
One of you needs to man
the fuck up and do it,
now,
because as laughable an idea as it is
to think she could win
this stupid contest,
this is in the end, the nation
that did give you eight years
of a Muslim nigga with
an Armada of drones.
You have seven days my
proud white warriors,
put a bullet in this fucking cunt,
(gun fires)
make it a million
till there's nothing left.
We will speak your name,
Jack the fuck out.
- Cactus Jack, just call
yourself what you are,
a coward.
- You think you're funny, man.
(people chattering)
(bright epic music)
- [Anonymous] To the man who
calls himself Cactus Jack,
we have watched as you
have rocketed to infamy
in a few short weeks via
a supercharged site called
Vitriolic Hateful Rhetoric.
We have watched as you've
published handcrafted propaganda
and laid waste to your
fellow man and woman
for nothing more than
arbitrary color of skin
or country of origin or sexual identity
and now,
we have watched as you have
called for literal blood,
we will watch no longer,
your days are numbered,
your raspberry pie will not protect you.
Your VPN would not shield you,
the dark net will not hide you.
We will find you, we will
reveal you to the world.
You and your kind are finished,
we are Anonymous,
we are Legion,
we do not forgive,
we do not forget,
expect us.
- You think I'm scared of you?
You must be out of your minds.
I scare you.
I'm the one in here, but
you're the cornered animals.
You're quaking in your boots.
You think I'm afraid of you
you rag headed camel fucking sand niggas?
We'll come and get it,
your 72 virgins await.
And you, you toddler-killing blind-firing
car-stealing dope-dealing black monkeys,
you think I'm scared of you
and your empty chest thumping threats
with your black hoods
and black boots and guts?
Lamb's closing his lions,
the whole fucking lot of you,
come and get it.
Your homeys can pour a 40 up in your honor
when I put two in your chest
and one in your nappy-headed skull.
I thought you pansy ass hype-skirt
blue-blood libtard fucks
with your white guilt
and your angry tweets
and your sham elections,
with your parading pink
army of confused queers
and cross-dressers and
come belting, faggots,
and your loud mouth harpy cunt women
with a glass ceiling boo hoo hoo bullshit,
come on, you know you want it, baby.
Let's not forget you baby-eating
reptilian world running
Bohemian Grove Illuminati government fucks
with your false flags and poisoned taps
and overfilled cages, I
know you're listening,
I can hear you breathing,
so come and fucking get it.
You think I haven't been
preparing for this my whole life?
What do you think this is?
You think I haven't killed before?
I'm down here, microphone to mouth
spitting truth out to you
ignorant lost shit birds
day in and day out and
I got an army of my own,
we are a rising tide,
a nation with no borders hiding among you
on your streets, in your neighborhoods
and we're fucking sick of it.
We're sick of your white-guilt, crybaby
forced apology bullshit.
We're sick of your shift with palms up
out for a fucking
handout, whiny nigga shit.
We're sick of you're
backwards desert drilling,
stupid scumbag religions
and you're stinking shitty
birds nest beards and hypocrisy
and pussy ass suicide bombs.
Look me in my fucking eye you cowards.
We're sick of your hand in our pockets
and your picket fences and punch cards
you fascist, empty headed, stuffed suit,
corporate puppet politicians.
You job stealing immigrant fucks.
You dirty drunken rapist cholos
and sad face Syrian leftovers,
fuck you!
Go home!
(soft suspenseful music)
Or better yet
come here
'cause I got something for you too.
You motherfuckers think I'm scared of you?
I will give you my goddamn address,
I'm right here, I'm waiting,
so, come and fucking get me!
(soft suspenseful music)
(door gliding)
Hey, Spielberg, so, you're notice our cat.
Notice how citizens fucking came.
I'm betting you saw that stupid
fucking "Saw" movie there,
didn't you?
(saw clatters)
Kill your friend.
Take care of the balls.
(epic suspenseful music)
(Ronald roars)
Don't worry my jackhammers and jack offs,
they ain't get me yet.
(eerie music)
(Ronald roars)
(soft suspenseful music)
I'm still kicking,
coming to you live from the bunker.
It's been six days since I've eaten
unless you count the fucking spiders,
four since I unplugged.
(soft suspenseful music)
(eerie music)
(Ronald coughs)
I've had a lot of time to
think these past few days
to ruminate
on things I've said, things I've done.
(indistinct)
Unspeakable things,
things for which there
can be no forgiveness,
maybe it's the fucking mineral spirits,
maybe it's the Holy Spirit, I don't know,
I just know that we are
all one, I see that now.
I'm sorry that it took this,
that it had to go so far to see
but I now know that we are all one.
We all bleed red, we're all one.
One race, human beings joined
together by happenstance
or intelligent design, it doesn't matter,
either way, we're here together
on this rock hurtling
through infinite space
at unfathomable speeds
made up of the stuff of stars.
Each of us born innocent
and perfect in our own way,
like snowflakes,
only later corrupted along
the way by our lesser
primordial evolutionary impulses,
by competition, by fear and
anxiety and self doubt, by ego.
It's our responsibility as humans,
as members of the human race
to bask in the shared experience,
to lend a hand no matter
its color or creed,
to help one another,
to exist in harmony and peace
and love above all else,
for the children, if not for ourselves.
(Ronald laughing)
(soft somber music)
Donald Trump is now our
president as I foretold.
You assholes said it was impossible.
You hottie ignorant fucks,
you bloated smug know
nothings, I called it,
I was right about that
just like I'm right about everything else,
but remember, that's not
all I said was coming.
With the Donald comes the
final reckoning fucktards.
Every fucking nigga,
cunt, kike, spit, goop,
libtard, faggot, all of you are gonna fry,
lock and load my proud white
warriors, stay vigilant,
they're coming from me,
they wanna silence me,
they want me dead
for giving voice to the same thoughts
you had inside your
heads every fucking day.
That means they want you dead too.
They wanna silence you same as me
and not just your tongue and your mind,
they wanna control what
you're allowed to think
let alone say,
they wanna control what
you can tell and teach
your beautiful white children,
they wanna be celebrated
and they want you to pay
but they're the ones who are gonna pay.
They're coming for me and you,
you, my jackhammers, you have a chance,
you have right now to secure
the safety of your banner
and your race.
You have a job and it's
your responsibility
as a member of the white...
Wait, what the fuck was
that, did you hear that?
(soft suspenseful music)
(epic suspenseful music)
I see you Spielberg, back
in your fucking hole.
(epic suspenseful music)
(gun cocks)
(epic suspenseful music)
(door bangs)
(gun fires)
(gun bangs)
(door clicks)
(dog barks)
I'm a little old man
With a little old plan
And the little old dream come true
Every time I look into your eyes
And say I love you
And the that I'd use
And the
And I want you kiss
you on that sunny side
Jubilee, Jubilee
I love you, you love me
Rolling on doing wrong
I'm a little old man
With a little old plan
And the little old dream come true
Every time I look into your eyes
And say I love you
(soft music)
And the
I'm a little old man
With a little old plan
And the little old dream come true
Every time I look
into your eyes and say
Every time I look
into your eyes and say
Every time I look
into your eyes and say
I love you
- [Man] Baba Booey.
(ominous music)
(projector roaring)
(eerie music)
(door knocks)
(dog barking)
- [Sandberg] Hey man.
- [Ronald] So, you're the guy?
- [Sandberg] Oh, yeah.
- [Ronald] You're alone, right?
- [Sandberg] Yeah, yeah,
is it cool if I start filming now?
- No, when we get inside.
(door slams)
You're not gonna try to fuck me, are you?
- [Sandberg] No, no way,
man, not at all, no.
- All right,
all right good.
You know,
'cause people like to spin shit
and I
don't want you spinning my shit all around
making me look stupid or bad or anything.
- [Sandberg] No, no way, man,
no, I wouldn't, I wouldn't.
- All right, 'cause I wanna
look at all the footage
before you do anything with it,
I want, what do you fucking
call that in movies?
I want final cut.
- [Sandberg] Of course, man, all yours.
- All right, okay.
(footsteps clumping)
I cannot stress enough how important it is
that you do not try to fuck me.
(soft suspenseful music)
(footsteps clumping)
Well, I guess, set up wherever you want,
how do you wanna do this?
(epic suspenseful music)
So, what do I?
Do I talk to you, do I talk to the camera?
Am I supposed to look at it, what?
- [Sandberg] You can just talk to me,
let's just have a conversation.
- Just ignore the camera, faggot!
- [Sandberg] Yeah, fly on
the wall, fly on the wall.
- All right, let's go.
You fucking kike nigger, gook, cunt.
- [Sandberg] Why don't
you just say your name,
just tell us your name.
- Why?
Why does it matter?
- [Sandberg] I don't
know, I guess it doesn't,
it's just, you know, a name.
- Names don't mean shit.
You know how many aliases I've used
calling into radio shows?
Names don't matter,
it's what fucking someone
says and someone does
that fucking matters.
I hate my name, fuck my name.
Why are you here?
What are you after?
- [Sandberg] I thought you knew,
you know, our mothers both.
- Yeah, yeah, I get it.
Your mom has her head filled
with nonsense every Sunday
along with that incontinent
monstrosity of mine upstairs,
you heard about me, I get it,
but I mean what's your angle?
- [Sandberg] What, you mean for the doc?
I just thought it was really
interesting, you know,
that someone hasn't left
their basement in six months,
not even to use the
bathroom, is that true?
- Why would I wanna go out there?
A man's home is his castle.
I got everything I need right here.
What's out there for me?
- [Sandberg] I don't know,
other people?
- (scoffs) Other people, you
fucking kidding me, right?
What in the fucking would I
want or need other people for?
I'm my own man, I know how to
exist and thrive without aid.
That's what's wrong with society,
that's what's wrong with most people,
they're weak will pussies and parasites
who buy into that whole fucking
it takes a village bullshit,
'cause they can't stand
on their own fucking feet,
I stand on my own two feet.
- [Sandberg] Right?
It's obvious that I'm not trying to be,
man, don't get me wrong but like,
I'm just acknowledging that
and you, in fact, live
in your mom's basement.
- What?
No, no, no, no, no,
get it straight motherfucker,
this is my house,
my father left it to me,
he fucking despised her as much as I do.
It's only out of the
kindness of my own heart
that I let her stay here and trust me
every day I dream about throwing
her fat-ass to the wolves.
(wolves growling)
- [Sandberg] She is your
mother and on some level
you still love her, right?
- Love?
Fuck no, love.
Maybe 20 years ago I
would have thrown her out,
but I couldn't do it now, not even to her,
not with the roving pack of fucking niggas
and everything else that
moved in and took over.
This neighborhood, like every neighborhood
in every city in this goddamn
country has gone to shit.
Even my cunt mother doesn't deserve that.
Probably mercy kill her first.
(soft music)
- [Sandberg] Oh, okay, all right.
(Sandberg sighs)
How do you survive?
Don't you rely on her at all?
How do you make a living
or like eat and shit?
- I'm a miner.
I pan for gold in them nareos,
cryptocurrency motherfucker,
ever heard of it?
- [Sandberg] Okay, gotcha.
Like Bitcoin.
So, you have mining first
day like can gaze but
it's still engaging
society some way, right?
- I get where you're going with this kid,
don't.
Bet your ass I could survive in the wild,
I can kill, dress a deer,
I can fish, don't you worry about me,
I got every item and
every skill it'll take
when the time comes.
- [Sandberg] When not if,
you mean like Thursday like
it'll happen in a lifetime.
- Lifetime, it'll happen in
the next two fucking years.
We are weeks away from
this bullshit election and
I know you don't wanna hear this
but Donald Trump is gonna win the election
and then he's gonna take office and then,
might not happen
immediately but it's coming,
'cause those niggas get
more and more uppity
every fucking day, black lives matter
and all this other bullshit,
that is going to lead to the race war
that will end all race wars,
we have unfinished business.
(soft suspenseful music)
Civil War
was just the fucking beginning,
this shit's been brewing for decades.
- [Sandberg] Wow.
Not sure what to say there.
- What's the matter?
(Sandberg exhales)
(soft suspenseful music)
What did you think this was?
What did you think you were walking into?
Some fat slob playing video
games in his mom's basement?
You were gonna make your little movie
or a documentary exploiting him?
Wrong basement, homeboy, wrong guy.
(soft suspenseful music)
But you aren't going anywhere yet,
no matter how vile you think I am,
how fucked up and damaged
or misguided or evil,
you're in for the long
haul, you're hooked.
(soft suspenseful music)
I can see it in your eyes.
(soft suspenseful music)
- Oh, oh, so, I just got out of there
and this dude, he's (laughs)
he's a fucking trip.
He's the real deal I think, man,
I thought it was just
gonna be some fucking loser
like sitting in his basement
like playing into some
video games or some shit but
it's a fucking bunker down there (laughs),
and like, he's for real,
man, he's fucking serious,
and like fucking, he's like raw man.
He's like mining the real raw shit, man,
he's down in there
and so, I think if I
go down there and that
I'm willing to like, you know,
like listen to him like he's
a real human being there,
we can, you know,
there's something there
that we all need to learn
and you know, hear him and really
look past all the fucking (vomit)
and like see what's really wrong, man,
like, there's some like,
like, you know, there's
some disconnect there and
if I can find it, we can really,
like, or I can, well, yeah,
something's there and
now's the time to get in there and
like, show over the world, like
this fucking mole that
has buried himself in the fucking dirt,
you know and like,
I don't know.
Okay, this guy is,
he's, it's like pure hate, man,
this is like the drug of hate and like,
if we can just, kind of, figure out
how he's getting high off of
it, maybe we can start like,
pulling that shit back off of him, man.
It's hate that we're in a fucking high
and this dude is fucking hot
for that shit, daily (laughs),
and (Sandberg sighs)
can just like, you know,
chew it like a drug,
chew it like a drug and just
break through that shit,
figure it out, you know,
it's like a science project, you know?
It feels like, you got a science fair shit
and I'm gonna make it my
little project and you know,
figure this shit out.
What is hate?
Where does it come from?
Where does it go?
Yeah.
Right now it's fucking caged (laughs).
Nigga's fucking caged his
own head and just shaking it,
shaking his own fucking cage (laughs),
it's absurd.
Fucking absurd.
You're right,
you're not what I expected and I'm hooked.
Tell me more about these radio
shows you're calling into.
You wouldn't have any of
those tapes, would you?
- [Ronald] Oh, yeah, tons of them.
- [Gary] Hey, loyal listeners,
this is the Grind and Run with Steve.
Steven Richmond, tell me what's
grinding your gears tonight.
Steve, you there?
- [Ronald] I'm here.
You wanna know what grinds my gears, Gary?
Where to begin.
Let's start with the
swelling tide of blue blood
bleeding heart libtards
who bend over backwards to
apologize on behalf of Muslims
every time one of these rag heads
opens fire on innocent Americans.
Last month, it was Paris,
fine, I'm no fan of the French
and that's an ocean away on our TV screens
but last week, last,
last week, it was San Bernardino
back in our home turf in our own backyard,
this gutless camel jockey
and his worthless wife
killed 14 of my countrymen in cold blood,
how at a party for Christ's sake?
14 on the floor and today, today
on the anniversary of Pearl Harbor,
only Donald Trump
has the courage and conviction
to stand up and publicly
say what needs to be said
and these spineless waves
on the left, when crucified for it,
we're here safety, goddamn right,
we need to lock our
borders down yesterday.
We didn't learn our lesson in 93
when I was Osama bin Laden
took a shot at the Twin Towers,
we gave him a loose
leash and that dog bit.
when are we gonna wake the fuck up?
- [Gary] No, I'm sorry, Steve,
I'm thinking that we're laying down here
but we can't have that kind of language.
(soft suspenseful music)
(Steve sighs)
- [Ronald] When are we
gonna wake up and realize
that inclusive is what brought down Troy?
You let your guard down,
you have no one to blame but yourselves.
This is a failure of leadership
and it's no surprise
that Barack Hussein Obama
and his lame duck do nothing flunkies
let it happen over and
over and over again.
Seven years we went without an attack
since this great nation's
birthday in O two
until he took office and
then what did you get?
Little Rock, Fort Hood,
Boston Marathon, Chattanooga
and now the latest.
While he's spying on you
collecting your metadata,
what did it get you?
14 on the floor, that's what it gets you.
Well, it's time we put
our foot down, I say,
I'll be damned if it happens again,
not on my watch, not in my yard.
I am locked and I am loaded
and I am prepared to defend
myself and my own land
and every one of your
listeners better be too,
because it's not going to get any better
until we stand up and
say, enough is enough.
We're tired of these glass jaw apologies
on behalf of murderers.
We're sick of the crying
or the torture at Gitmo,
the greatest generation knew
better than to open that door.
Again, 73 years ago today,
we were attacked and what did we do?
We rounded those squeaky-eyed
sons of bitches up
and tossed them in camps,
and locked down the borders
to their kind, no entry.
That is the answer and say
what you want about the man,
but at least Trump has
the intestinal fortitude
to stand up and say what
needs to be said, no more!
We are at war.
For the first time since the 1700s,
a foreign enemy is attacking
us on our own soil,
what are you gonna do about it?
What are you going to do, Gary?
What are your listeners gonna do?
Lock and load.
I'm ready and I will not hesitate.
- [Gary] Are you advocating violence?
Steve, we can't...
- You're goddamn right I am.
Until the f nigga incharge
gets his nappy head out of his black ass,
I am fully prepared to kill and
to die to defend my country.
(radio buzzing)
(radio tuning)
This is a bedtime story I like
to call tranny faggot fox.
You want to know what gender you are,
reached down the front
of your fucking pants,
if you have an innie, you're a girl,
if you have an outie, you're a boy,
end of fucking story.
What other species of animal
dreams up this kind of preposterous shit?
A male lion is a male lion
regardless of how he feels.
Presume there's gonna be fucking urinals
in lady's room
just because some maladjusted, sicko fuck
got off on wearing mother's
lipstick and pearls
and never bothered to grow up,
it doesn't mean the rest
of us have to play along.
These fucking monstrosities,
sorry, but Bruce Caitlyn
Jenner is not brave
and if you think he/she is,
you're a fucking flaming faggot waterhead
liberal fucktard.
It's ridiculous, Jesus Christ!
Next thing you know,
niggas are gonna wanna start
using the same water fountains
as the rest of us.
Oh, wait, that slippery
slope is what led to this.
I've got a million more in here, man,
anytime you wanna hear,
anytime you wanna fucking hear it.
(soft suspenseful music)
This has got all the truth you need.
- [Sandberg] Okay, let's backtrack.
You never leave this
basement, so, tell me,
how do you spend all
that free time down here?
Can you like walk me
through, I don't know,
a day in the life of Ronald.
- I get up, morning faggots
and a special wakey, wakey eggs and Bakey
to all you niggas, immigrants and cunts.
(soft music)
I put my boots on,
it is a beautiful day in the neighborhood.
(soft music)
Could I be?
Might I be
your neighbor,
neighbor?
Let's go.
You want a day in the life?
First stop on our tour is this room
where my father blew off his fucking head
when I was 13 years old.
My old bedroom is located
directly above this room.
Stop number two is my mother's shit.
Like I told you, she was
allowed to be a teacher,
this is some of her shit from then.
(desk slams)
Over here is where I do my business.
I take the morning piss,
freshen up,
(water splashing)
wash my balls, shower, shit, shave,
get some water coffee,
maybe I'd do a little
light reading or writing
while I listen to radio.
Usually get in a little
workout before I eat,
pushups, swinging kettle
bell and some metrics.
Figure out what to eat.
I make everything a little fast,
cook it, eat it then play a little bass.
(bass guitar music)
(indistinct)
(bass guitar music)
- [Mother] Fucking
stop!
- Fuck you!
Oh, you wanna see something
really fucking cool?
(soft suspenseful music)
This is some of my dad's old shit.
(soft suspenseful music)
(table squeals)
(stool clatters)
You're gonna love this.
(table squeals)
(box gliding)
(hinges squeaking)
(soft suspenseful music)
4th of July was his favorite holiday.
He used to run around with these sparklers
wearing this Abraham Lincoln mask.
(Ronald inhales)
(soft suspenseful music)
(mask clatters)
This,
make sure you get this, man,
this is a real kicker.
(soft suspenseful music)
- [Sandberg] Oh, (exhales) fuck!
- Look at that.
- [Sandberg] Yeah, that's nice.
(soft suspenseful music)
- You got enough of this
bullshit reenactment garbage?
Who gives a fuck what I eat?
I have shit to say, man,
you wanna hear it or not?
Niggas have never shown
an aptitude for anything
but murder, theft, rape, slinging dope
and rioting every time a
good cop takes out the trash.
To shit on niggas
is not to dehumanize them,
(soft suspenseful music)
they aren't fucking human!
Faggot.
Faggot.
Faggot, faggot, fucking
faggot, fucking nigga, cunt.
You fucking kike dyke gook, faggot.
You don't get to own words
you fucking straw grasping pussies,
you cannot take them back,
they were never yours
to goddamn begin with.
You fucking people
do not even understand
the origins of these words
that you hold so dear.
All this harping
about slavery,
do you call horses slaves?
Do you call cows slaves?
Calling it slavery infers that
they are in some way equal
or even the same species,
stop it.
Remember that Congressman,
who the fuck was it?
Doesn't matter, I don't remember.
Anyway, the guy used the word niggardly
and he was fucking forced to resign.
Let me get this straight,
you can't even use a word that sounds
fucking phonetically similar
to one of these off
limits hate speech words.
40,000 years ago
the Caucasoids broke
off from the Mongolians,
whites are descended from
that brave renegade tribe.
A tribe of trailblazers
and conquers and pioneers,
that's how far it's gone.
They're keeping score at home, man.
Niggardly means to hate
spending money or to be cheap,
like, you know,
a fucking mealy mouth Jew.
We moved to colder
climates, we crossed oceans,
we tamed new wilds, domesticated animals,
mastered metallurgy.
We fucking evolved
while the African Mongoloid
stayed the same pathetic
primitive creature it always was.
You know the entomology
of the word faggot, dude?
No one knows this,
even faggots don't fucking know this,
it's old English,
it means a bundle of sticks.
Why do we bring them out of Africa?
Why didn't we just leave them there?
Because there was a time that whites,
before we got addicted to guilt,
could see niggas for what
they really are, cattle.
Dogs and wolves can
fuck and make offspring
but let's understand and recognize
that that does not make
them the same species,
so, don't give me fucking
mulattoes and half-breeds
as some kind of evidence
that were the same.
Did some slave owners fuck their
niggas out by the woodshed?
Of course,
same as Australians fuck sheep.
You asked me, Jefferson was
a fucking beast Opheliac.
This country put a goddamn
cattle fucker on a coin,
chew on that cud, homeboy.
Now, the fucking cry baby faggots
and trannies and everybody
they'll have you believing
that it's some bigoted thing
about burning faggots at the stake
with the sticks, ever the victim, right?
Bullshit.
Or they'll tell you it's
about a bundle of sticks
being representative of fucking what?
Like all the dicks, all together
like in a fucking gay nightclub.
And don't give me melanin either,
it's not just color, man,
it's not just pigment,
this shit is phenotypic.
Kinky nappy fucking hair, ashy skin
flared animal nostrils,
a propensity for mindless
animal violence, sickle cell,
the big nigga asses, it's
a high hip to waist ratio.
Their prognostic jaws,
their big fucking blunt sucking lips,
their long monkey arms
and soulless idiot eyes,
don't give me human.
You see,
faggot
started as a derogation of women.
We referred to them as a burden,
like, oh, I don't know, a
bundle of wood, useless,
they don't carry their own fucking weight,
they are baggage that
we have to haul around
while we get shit done, see.
It takes an average IQ of 90
to run a technological nation
and that's why Africa is still
goddamn jungles and deserts
and why they still carry their water
in woven baskets on
their empty monkey heads.
They have all the goddamn resources,
coltan, lithium, cassiterite,
they're sitting on a fucking goldmine
and they're too stupid to realize it,
meanwhile, China's swoops in
and suck some dry for
fucking custodial gigs,
it's a disgrace.
So get over yourselves
you fucking fairies,
you're just annoying
little limp wristed nats.
No one gives a shit if you live or die,
so, shut the fuck up,
enjoy your AIDS in peace
so, the rest of us can
get on with our existence.
Enough with the parades
and the rainbow flags.
You are a nuisance, not a course.
In reference, I wish that
cunt would shut the fuck up.
Keep rolling, fuck this,
fuck it, I'm not done.
The framers figured it out,
they gave them three fifths,
you are three fifths of a
fucking person, that's it,
and that was generous.
This woman cannot shut the
fuck up, you hear this?
One of this days you're
gonna show up here and
you're gonna help me bury a fucking body.
They had it right back then,
that's what I call a faggot,
useless, in the way, too much work,
a suck on society and fucking decency.
It's not just faggots,
queers and trainees that
are faggots by the way,
women are faggots, feminists are faggots,
niggas are faggots,
welfare queens are faggots,
crack babies are faggots,
the police are faggots,
priests are faggots, finger
fucked alter boys are faggots,
politicians are faggots,
the school board are faggots,
teachers are fucking faggots,
hedge funders are faggots,
the toothless fuck trying
to get a dollar out of me
at the gas station is a faggot.
border hopping, job deeps are faggots,
the weak stupid earth worshipers
who couldn't stop us from
stealing their land, faggots.
Refugees are faggots, retards are faggots,
kike speaks slopes are fucking faggots.
The French, total white
flag-waving faggots
Muhammad and Jesus,
circle jerking faggots.
Camel jockey, ISIS, terrorists,
fuck some faggots, and
last but not least
white liberal fucking faggots,
you do deserve to be burned at the stake.
Race traitor faggots.
(upbeat suspenseful music)
He used to love wearing
these fucking rings.
Oh, my God, he was,
I think it's 'cause he couldn't
wear them like when he was working
'cause he was an electrician, you know?
So, he would get a finger blown off
if he was wearing all this metal
but he used to walk around.
He used to fucking walk around
with like three of these
things on like this
and he'd go down to the liquor store
and he'd go and get his fucking gin and
sit there.
These rings on all of them.
My old man was smart,
was rash,
a tinker, an electrician.
He was very scientific,
he had a very logical
approach to everything.
Everything was schematics and
flow charts so, you could,
you can actually believe
everything he said,
it all made sense, but he wasn't perfect.
- [Sandberg] How do you mean?
(soft suspenseful music)
- He was weak?
- [Sandberg] How so?
(soft suspenseful music)
- He always took the easy way out,
always compromised.
- [Sandberg] You think
compromise makes you weak?
(soft suspenseful music)
- No, it doesn't make you weak,
it's a sign you're weak, a symptom,
another is attempting to escape reality.
You don't run from reality and
you don't make deals with it,
you put its teeth on the curve
and shape it with the downward
thrust of your fucking heel.
My old man ran from everything.
He ran from that fat fucking
idiot harpy nag upstairs,
he hid down here in his fucking workshop.
A grown,
a grown man hiding.
(soft suspenseful music)
He ran from society
when it started prioritizing
handouts to niggas and illegals
over rewarding hardworking Americans,
he ran from his fucking
responsibilities with a boozy
and he ran for reality
like a fucking head in the
sand libtard kami faggot
when he put a bullet in his brain,
this one.
(soft suspenseful music)
He was wearing this one when he did it.
You see that right there,
you're getting that where it's cut,
that's what they do when
they have to cut a ring
off of someone's dead body,
he was wearing this one.
(soft suspenseful music)
I don't know why I hate them,
look at all these rings, son.
(soft suspenseful music)
(rings clattering)
- [Sandberg] Are you different?
You're not hiding down here
like you said he did but.
- You think I'm hiding down here?
(soft suspenseful music)
I'm not hiding, yet, I'm biding my time.
(soft suspenseful music)
- [Sandberg] You're gonna
shape your own reality
from down here?
- Oh, yeah.
- I got big things in store,
don't you worry about me.
What do you think I am glad
like some afraid of them,
you think I'm fucking scared?
Oh, contraire, motherfucker,
they need to be afraid to me.
I don't go out there because
it turns my fucking stomach,
it disgusts me.
Fucking faggots making out in
the street in broad day light,
race traitors and niggas
fucking holding hands,
making fucking mutant babies.
Loud mouth cunts
constantly bitching and
moaning about equality
while men hold doors
open and buy them meals
and let them off with fucking warnings
instead of speeding tickets.
Spineless,
cock social justice retards
turning every fucking
word in the dictionary
into a goddamn landmine.
No,
they should consider themselves lucky.
(soft suspenseful music)
Next time I go out there, you
better watch your fucking six
and batten down the fucking hatches,
'cause I'm coming out guns blazing.
(soft suspenseful music)
- [Sandberg] Was this a violent
household you grew up in?
- What, physically?
No.
I'd have killed them
in their fucking sleep.
- [Sandberg] Emotionally?
- Man, she's a fucking nightmare.
Look at this shit.
This
is basically the inside of her head.
All cotton brain fucking
button-eyed idiocy,
fake fucking flowers,
dust covered little kid shit.
She's a child,
a fat piss-dripping Jesus-loving child
with her trinkets and her
fucking figurines and shit,
watch it, watch it.
(soft suspenseful music)
She will be yelling down any day now.
Listen, fucking October
for me to set up the fucking
Christmas tree, mark by words.
What's emotional abuse, anyway?
Pussy faggot shit, excuses to fail,
to hand over power.
She wasn't abusive,
she's just a fat fucking nag
who will drive you to kill
yourself if you let her.
- [Sandberg] You really
do hate your own mother,
don't you?
- I mean,
she's a woman,
(soft suspenseful music)
why wouldn't I?
(epic suspenseful music)
- [Host] We're on with Jack,
Jack in Dearborn, what's on your mind?
- [Ronald] You're not gonna like it.
- [Host] Try me.
(soft suspenseful music)
(Ronald sighs)
- [Ronald] I've had it
up to my goddamn gills
with the systematic
feminization of this country.
- [Host] Ooh, this should
be good, buckle up folks.
- [Ronald] There you go.
More condescension, surprise, surprise.
I can't watch the news these
days without some commercial
giving us this pathetic dumbed-down
purse-holding lug of a husband
and his all knowing suburban Oracle wife
to make the fallacious point,
that we men don't know
or care about anything
beyond beer or breasts
and only Athena herself
can make the decision to
choose the right minivan
or laundry detergent or goddamn
snack chip for the family.
We men who incidentally
brought you everything,
from fire to farming, from
the compass to the cotton gin,
steam engine and electricity
and the light bulb and
refrigeration and...
- [Host] War and slavery
and rape, don't forget rape.
I mean you even do it to each other
when we don't let you near us anymore.
- [Ronald] I am talking here.
- [Host] My, my, are
we a prickly one, Jack?
(Ronald laughs)
- [Ronald] Lady, you
don't know that half of it
and I'm not alone,
you think we don't
understand what this is?
I'm with her, I could fucking puke.
- [Host] Language, strike one.
- [Ronald] Hate to break
it to you, sweetheart,
but it's time to reconcile.
Dom loves the country over
are waking up to the rules.
We know they're spoonfeeding
us, Hillary Clinton.
- [Host] Not the nefarious
they and who would they be?
The NSNBC, CNN (gasps)
Better Homes and Gardens?
- Please,
I'm talking Bohemian Grove,
the Bilderbergs and the Rothschilds.
- [Host] All three?
- [Ronald] Open your eyes.
Power's already been consolidated,
it's all hold'em to them now.
It's been the slow play
years in the making
and we're coming up on the river,
but lo and behold along
comes this articulate black
to upset the applecart.
Libtards and social justice faggots
fall all over themselves
to signal their most virtuous of virtues
and elect car-baby Berry Hussein to what?
Right the wrong of slavery?
But we're right back on
schedule now, aren't we?
Spent the last 20 years
portraying women as the most
reasonable and measured
and presidential of people
because you creatures are so known
for tempering your emotions
and making rational decisions,
meanwhile, making men out to
be dead weight, the buffoons,
the butt of the joke.
- [Host] Oh, I think you gentlemen
do a pretty bang up job on that.
- [Ronald] Do you wanna know what I think?
I think you are overpaid
at 70 cents on the dollar.
I think you are weak and
inferior and I think you know it.
You don't see any couches
in the men's room bitch.
- [Host] Case in point.
- [Ronald] You wanna get real?
Let's get real.
On top of being the buffoon,
now we don't even get
to be the strong ones.
This is the emasculation
I'm talking about.
Now, we get, men could never
handle the pain of childbirth.
Well, riddle me this, bad girl,
if you women are so tough
and can take pain so well,
how come I'm not allowed
to punch you in the face
once in a while, when you run
your clueless whore mouth?
- [Host] Okay, this little
gel sting match has been fun.
- [Ronald] When Trump wins this election,
you'll have no one to
blame but yourselves.
Blow back, baby, you earned it.
Stop shoving chivalry
down our goddamn throat,
stop voting with your snatches
and maybe we'll let you stay
when we kick these goddamn
rag heads out of the country.
(phone disconnects)
- [Host] Jesus!
Someone get that guy a Thorazine.
I mean, I need to scrub that one off of me
so, I'm gonna go lie down on
that couch in the ladies room
to decompress for a moment,
but before I leave you with
a word from our sponsors,
if any of you plan to call
in and behave like that,
to talk over me and
scream and yell, don't.
Don't call here, ever.
Don't call anyone, get your own damn show
if you think you've got that much to say.
(epic suspenseful music)
(soft suspenseful music)
- [Ronald] Come on in, get in here.
Now, how you like that fucker?
- Are you ready for me today?
- Huh, yeah, I'm ready for you today.
I went to real school.
- Did you go to school?
- Come on, it's how you like it?
You liked this?
- Is that an eight millimeter?
- Yeah, it's an eight millimeter.
- I like it, it's a nice
camera, I have one like that.
I can get it to work for you.
- What's your name?
- [Ronald] (chuckles) Dude,
we've met like five times.
- What's your name?
You don't like that shit, do you?
(Sandberg sighs)
Names are important, remember?
- [Sandberg] My name is Chris.
I like long walks on the beach.
- Yeah, Chris what?
- Sandberg.
- [Ronald] Sandberg,
what, you a fucking Jew?
- No.
- [Ronald] I'm sure as hell
isn't Irish, what is it?
You probably a half kike, right?
Tell me about your mother,
how do you get along with your mother?
- She's great,
- Come on,
let's get on this side.
- We really Mahjong
I guess, in the park together.
- [Ronald] You play Mahjong with your mom?
- No, I don't.
- Yeah?
- No.
- It's your old man alive?
- Yeah, he's alive.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
- [Ronald] Does he hate
your fucking mother too?
- Probably.
- Yeah?
- They're divorced.
- So,
how does this feel having
a camera in your face?
Start talking, talk.
- This feels all right.
- Tell me what you think,
how do you feel about niggas?
You like niggas?
- No, never.
- Huh?
No, you don't?
- I mean.
- [Ronald] Then why are you so shocked
when I tell you the truth about them?
You need to grow up, kid?
- They never mess with me man.
- You need to grow the fuck up
- They ain't never messed with you.
Ah, that's sweet, that's sweet.
- No, they're generally, I like their,
some of their music is good.
- They?
What do you mean, they, who's they?
Who's they?
- The black peoples.
- The black people, okay.
- Yes.
The peoples that make up for
us in this country anything.
- [Ronald] Yeah, you
think women should have...
- I'm all in on you, man.
- You think women should have
an equal share?
You think women should have equal share?
You tiki wheel grilling
me about that shit before.
- Well, yeah.
- Huh?
Yeah?
- Yeah.
I've met some smart women.
- No, you haven't,
no, you fucking haven't.
- What about?
- [Ronald] That's pussy liberal talk shit.
- I'm trying to stay impartial.
- Yeah, why?
- Yeah, I...
'Cause.
- Why?
Life's not about impartial, we are at war.
So, Chris the Jew, when
you think about Muslims?
What do think about niggas?
- I don't know if
I've ever really talked to a Muslim.
- [Ronald] What do you think about niggas?
- They're great.
- Yeah,
what do you think about, they're great?
- No, I mean.
- If you need cotton picked
they're great,
or if you wanna watch a
fucking basketball game,
they're great.
- What do you want me to say?
- [Ronald] Why don't you say how you feel,
I want you to step up and be a fucking man
and tell me what you think of niggas.
- Well, right now I'm feeling a little,
(Sandberg sighs)
I think,
maybe I'll come back another day.
- Yeah?
- How about I'll just,
can you just?
- Yeah?
What do you think of Mexicans?
- I love Mexican food.
- [Ronald] You love Mexican
food so they can cook for you.
So, you'll get your cotton picked,
you'll get your food made.
(soft suspenseful music)
What do you think about niggas?
Be honest,
be honest.
Don't say what you're supposed
to fucking say, be honest.
- I am scared.
- Of niggas?
- No.
I mean, you got like 50.
- I was telling the truth,
what?
- How many guns you got downstairs, man?
You're blocking the exit here, man,
like, what do you want me to say?
' Cause...
- [Ronald] I want you to man
up and say what you think.
- And all the while,
you're putting me in
a weird position, man.
I didn't do this to you.
- You must be
some kind of mom, boy.
Probably suckled that tit
till you were like fucking 11.
- [Sandberg] Ah,
wait, what?
- Just your utter disbelief
that I could hate my mother,
that anyone could hate their mother,
like any two fucktards
with a cock and pussy
can't make a fucking baby.
Like it's inconceivable to you that
just because I came out of
her greasy stupid snatch
and I would wanna gouge
her fucking eyes out
and shut the life out of her someday,
that's a story as always time, man,
that's fucking arastes.
You don't get it, your mother's annoying?
Good for you,
that monster of mine up there,
she's a fucking rattlesnake.
Okay.
(chuckles) All right.
Here's a little insight for you.
I cannot count how many times
I came home as a kid
(soft suspenseful music)
to find her
laying there on the couch
or on the bed or the floor,
eyes wide open but still
as death, not breathing,
maybe a pill bottle
open and scattered on the
floor, maybe some other prop.
(soft suspenseful music)
I would go to her and shake her and
I'd start to cry and then,
you know, only after she got me to cry,
she fucking double over laughing
that fucking cackling
jackal laugh of her is just,
I got you, I got you.
(soft suspenseful music)
She pulled that shit
countless times,
just got to the point that if
I saw her laid out like that,
I would just walk right fucking by her
(soft suspenseful music)
hoping that it was true for once
and that I would be done with her,
and trust me, man,
that is just the tip in the
fucking iceberg with her,
don't fall for her diary
old church lady routine,
she is an evil cunt.
Stick around long and you'll see.
(soft suspenseful music)
You know what I like to do sometimes?
(soft suspenseful music)
(gun clicks)
I like to lock and load
and trace her when she walks around.
(soft suspenseful music)
(footsteps clumping)
Oh, she's going onto the sink,
(soft suspenseful music)
(footsteps clumping)
to the bathroom.
(footsteps clumping)
(soft suspenseful music)
Got you.
(footsteps clumping)
(soft suspenseful music)
She's coming this way.
This is where it gets fun.
There she comes, right above us
and then she's gonna sleep in the bed.
(footsteps clumping)
(soft suspenseful music)
(Ronald laughs)
(soft suspenseful music)
One of these fucking days, man.
(soft suspenseful music)
(footsteps clumping)
- (sighs) Okay.
This guy is a fucking animal
and he's got himself (exhales)
he's got himself on a leash
and he's fucking gnawing at it
and he's itching,
he's itching to get off
of that fucking leash
and he's gonna fucking
kill some people, man,
and I'm gonna be first, so, if I'm gone,
you'll fucking know why.
So, if you find this
phone somewhere (exhales)
I probably won't be far.
Fuck.
- [Mother] Oh, who's that?
Kathy's boy, your little friend?
He's a loser like you,
the both of you, worse...
- Fuck you!
- [Mother] Why are you making
a movie about him anyway?
What's so special about my loser cunt?
- Cunt?
- It's not a good time, man,
I can...
- No, no, fuck her,
let's go.
- Fuck me?
Fuck you you ungrateful (indistinct).
Why can't you get a job,
like (indistinct) job.
(coughs) 'Cause you're
a loser, that's why.
What an excuse of a man,
look at you, look at him.
(soft suspenseful music)
(mother tapping)
I ask one thing,
I ask one thing, you can't even
bring up the Christmas tree.
- It's fucking October!
- Losers!
You can't even help your
own mother, his own mother.
- My, god (chuckles).
(mother tapping)
- [Mother] Both of you, losers,
a span of losers.
(soft suspenseful music)
- I'm fucking going to her.
(indistinct)
You know what?
Shut the fuck up!
(mother tapping)
(Ronald grunts)
(metal banging)
(cabinet clatters)
Oh,
fuck!
(Ronald grunts)
(indistinct)
Shit!
- [Mother] Never!
Never a job traveling out in the world
(indistinct)
(Ronald pants)
I'll show you, huh!
(Ronald panting)
(mother tapping)
It's no wonder no one loves you,
why no woman ever wanted you.
Look at you, you low life.
You have sired yourself nothing.
How do you get married
in a fucking basement
with the spiders and the rats?
That's where you belong like a moron
hiding from the world
just like your father,
your moron father!
(indistinct)
- Shit!
That's not very nice.
- Submitting like a coward.
(indistinct)
(soft suspenseful music)
- Is it going to have to give
to get in somewhere right now?
- [Mother] No one likes you.
You hate me, I hate you!
I hated you since I birthed you,
I hated you from the moment you were born.
I couldn't wait to get you out of me,
I wish you were stillborn.
I wish you could have died
and it wasn't just me,
your father hated you, he was
ashamed of you we both were.
Shame on you...
- I'm gonna fucking
shut her up for good.
- Shame on you (indistinct).
- [Sandberg] Dude, dude!
Pun it down.
Stop, man, stop, don't do it man, fuck,
put it down, stop, man, stop!
Don't do this, it's not
fucking worth it, man.
- [Ronald] Die!
(gun fires)
- [Sandberg] Oh, shit,
stop, man, stop, would you?
(Ronald panting)
Oh, fuck!
I didn't see shit, man.
- [Ronald] Come here!
(camera clatters)
- [Sandberg] No, don't
Tommy, I'm so sorry.
- [Ronald] Who are you?
- [Sandberg] I can drive, run, man,
You know, I would, (panting),
you could just take the footage, man,
you can just take it all, I'm just gonna,
I'm just gonna head out, man,
just keep all this shit,
man, I was never here.
You know, I never saw shit.
I didn't see shit, man.
- But you did.
- [Sandberg] No, fuck, no!
(thumps)
(body thuds)
(clattering)
(footsteps clumping)
(Ronald sighs)
- My, my, what have we here?
You're mine now shit birds.
(machine roars)
(saw grinding)
(man coughs)
(man vomits)
(saw grinding)
Nice little church lady,
Christopher's saying...
(man coughs)
We're just talking to you
and now what are you
doing, what are you doing?
Say it, look at the
fucking camera and say it.
- No.
- You are cutting her arm
(man sobs)
to cover your tracks,
you say that, fuck.
(man sobs)
(man coughs)
(man groans)
- Let me out of here.
- Nope.
Sorry, kid.
I'm not done with you just yet.
- Just let me out of here.
- [Ronald] As long as I haven't figured
all the fucking shit you were shooting.
- No.
- You think I'm
your little project?
- No.
- A libtard, a faggot?
Piece of shit.
You are mine.
little project you rat, fuck.
(soft suspenseful music)
(machine buzzing)
- I didn't do anything,
I didn't do anything.
(sobs) Just let me go, please, stop.
No, no, no (indistinct)
fuck you, fuck you.
(man screams)
(soft suspenseful music)
- Smile, faggot,
you're on candid camera.
(soft suspenseful music)
(machine buzzing)
(epic suspenseful music)
Wake up slave.
(soft suspenseful music)
Imagine that's the worst thing you do.
(soft suspenseful music)
(camera clicks)
Go on, pick it up.
(soft suspenseful music)
Up here, Spielberg, on me.
We're gonna show them the life you live.
We're gonna change the world.
(soft suspenseful music)
(Sandberg exhales)
(cable clips)
(soft suspenseful music)
(Sandberg coughs)
Spielberg, pan up.
(Sandberg coughs)
- There's no pan to tilt up.
- Shut the fuck up,
you know what I want, tilt it up then.
Get this, make sure you can get all this.
(soft suspenseful music)
(machine buzzing)
Make sure you get all of this.
(machine roars)
You guys are gonna love this shit.
(machine roars)
(epic suspenseful music)
(soft suspenseful music)
This is Cactus Jack coming to you live
from a studio audience.
(audience applauds)
hallo, fucktards.
(bright epic music)
(audience applauds)
(bomb explodes)
Moment of truth, libtards,
time to point out
today's hypocrisy namely,
how you nutless cocks
constantly preach
inclusivity on the one hand
with your endorsements
of racial desegregation
and co-mingling to the point
of populating the planet
with meat and half-breeds of every stripe
and then engaging your
misguided half-assed
white savior dances with
niggas identity politics act
that throws around bullshit terms
like cultural appropriation
and cultural heritage.
One day you say we should
all fuck each other
until everyone is a
light butterscotch brown
and racism is relegated a
relic of the barbaric past,
and then the very next day, if not minute,
you're talking out of the other side
of your week, white guilt mouths
about how darkies should be allowed
to take the California achievement
test in fucking Bionics
or Spanglish or fucking clicks and worlds
or whatever other mongrel
language is the flavor of the day.
You make a protective
species of these shit stains
but then deny me my right
to pride in my own race.
You'd give them a month where
we get Frederick Douglas
and Dr. King and what the fuck
was he a doctor of anyway?
Adultery?
And that tar baby raising
that Harriet Tubman
crammed down our throats and say,
the other 11 months are white
history months, bullshit!
There is no more reviled figure
in the country these days
than the white male, thanks
to you race traitors,
and you wonder why these
cornered animals lash out
and shoot up their schools
and movie theaters,
it's because every white
girl has been brainwashed
by MTV and BET to think Moon crickets
where a third grade reading
level are their ideal mates.
And on top of it, they're
told that the greatest ill
on society is what they are,
not the droves niggas
shoplifting and boosting cars
and killing each other in Chicago,
it's Brad in the burbs.
Go to the fucking program,
you don't get to draw lines in the sand
and then fucking straddle them,
pick a fucking side because it's too late.
You know damn well
when the war comes, we
are locked and loaded
and ready to take this
country back with fire
and righteous fucking fury jackass.
(gun bangs)
(upbeat suspenseful music)
(Ronald claps)
Wake up.
(soft suspenseful music)
(Sandberg crying)
God!
- No.
(belt whips)
(Sandberg crying)
(bright epic music)
(bomb explodes)
- Let's talk about Flint, shall we?
A democratic stronghold.
Birthplace of that incontinent
whining whale, Michael Moore,
and they've got more lead in their pipes
that Robby the fucking robot.
These liberal skunks are
the personification of evil.
They pander to the
uneducated and impoverished,
tell them they'll save them, prop them up,
and bolden them to reach new heights
and grasp hold of the American dream,
all the while, poisoning our water,
poisoning our children's minds
and brainwashing fucking
public schools boards,
poisoning the media, it's all poison.
Look alive, faggot.
(water splashing)
(soft suspenseful music)
Get it all, that's all you get
there you go,
there you go.
Oh, I bet that feels good.
I bet you are starving,
come on, do you want some beans?
You want some beans?
(soft suspenseful music)
(Sandberg panting)
(Ronald spitting)
(soft suspenseful music)
(spoon clatters)
(fist thumps)
(soft suspenseful music)
Here's what you do with Baltimore,
you put a wall around it
and you let the Silverbacks
tear each other apart,
end of story.
When they're done, we turn
it into a parking lot.
Parking problem solved,
monkey problem solved,
you're welcome America.
(bright epic music)
That's right, folks, today
we're talking victim braining.
(bright soft music)
Remember, the only thing that
stops a bad guy with a gun
is a badder guy with a bigger gun,
be the badder guy, be
a warrior, be the wolf.
I'm an Islamophobe the same way
a battered, abused woman
would be afraid of the guy
who punched her in the fucking mouth.
Do you call cows slaves?
Calling niggas slaves infers
that they're equal in some way
or the same species,
stop it, Jack out, Jack out, Jack out.
(upbeat suspenseful music)
(whipping)
(Sandberg crying)
(soft suspenseful music)
- Another basement ball
buster all by himself,
mommy's upstairs cooking
your fucking cream of wheat.
- This motherfucker sits around
with this Nazi flags and paraphernalia.
(people chattering)
- I hope
you find out who this
guy is and shut him down.
(people chattering)
(soft suspenseful music)
- These niggas and these goddamn kikes
think they run this goddamn fucking world.
Look at where we are.
(soft suspenseful music)
Look.
I got the guns,
the dogs,
I got everything I need.
(soft suspenseful music)
Fuck this goddamn 'cause
y'all gotta fucking figure this shit out.
I understand the kikes
rule the fucking money
(soft suspenseful music)
and the goddamn niggas think
they're owed something,
(soft suspenseful music)
we don't owe them nothing.
Stupid niggas.
(bright epic music)
- I read your comments shit birds,
I see all your hurled insults,
your lame virtue signaling
and pathetic posturing,
you decry me as a racist,
a textbook example of the
pot calling the nigger black
as I've ever seen,
without having the fucking balls to admit
you're no different than
me, shut the fuck up,
be a man and admit that a
nigga is a lower life form
and a tranny is a fucking
mentally ill faggot
and all the rest of the universal truths
you're too much of a fucking
brown nose punk bitch
to say it out loud,
fuck you, grow a pair.
This is a call to arms,
put these monkeys and sand niggas
and border hoping Mexican narco shitbergs
down before they overrun the place.
This is a responsibility,
lock and load like warriors.
- Jack, you're gonna love this.
So, this nigga,
he come running up,
(soft suspenseful music)
we come running up,
(soft suspenseful music)
we put a 45 to his motherfucking head
(soft suspenseful music)
and he bloody stomped
on his goddamn fingers.
(soft suspenseful music)
That nigga fell (laughs)
and he fell,
(soft suspenseful music)
fell hard,
28 feet.
(soft suspenseful music)
Watched that motherfucker fall,
(soft suspenseful music)
he didn't give up,
(soft suspenseful music)
I put a 45 through his fucking head
and that stupid nigga didn't
have a goddamn chance,
all he tried to do was hold on,
it's all he's trying to do
as we sat there and laughed.
(soft suspenseful music)
Fucking awesome.
(soft suspenseful music)
I pulled the trigger on
that motherfuckers head
and that
is how
he fell.
(soft music)
- Look at me,
look at me!
(soft suspenseful music)
Look at me!
(soft suspenseful music)
Welcome to bootcamp.
(fist thumps)
Yes, the cactus Jack
show has been canceled.
However, it's been replaced
by a fine mid season replacement,
ladies and gentlemen,
get ready for the hottest
new game show around,
Wheel of Torture.
(audience applauds)
Our contestant today is Chris,
a half kike and a faggot
from Fayetteville, North Carolina.
Chris, it's great to have you as always,
let's give the wheel a spin.
(bright epic music)
I said let's give the wheel a spin.
(bright epic music)
(wheel clicks)
(bright epic music)
Let's give that wheel a spin
and goes all round and round she goes,
where she stops, nobody knows.
Oh, it's one of my personal favorites,
it's why you're acting the way you are,
it's a little more liquid wrench.
You know what to do, kid,
(bright epic music)
breathe it in.
Breathe it in.
Oh.
Oh, there you go.
The crowd goes wild.
(audience applauding)
(bright epic music)
(wheel rattling)
Oh, and blame it on drink piss,
always a favorite of mine, come on, Chris,
drink that piss.
Drink it.
(soft suspenseful music)
Drink it, drink it!
(soft suspenseful music)
Drink it, all of it, drink it.
(piss splashing)
(Sandberg coughs)
Drink it!
(soft suspenseful music)
Yeah, yeah.
(liquid burbles)
(Sandberg buffs)
Oh, fuck, yeah.
(liquid burbles)
(soft suspenseful music)
Fuck yeah.
Yeah, drink it.
Well, Chris, you've
span another wild card,
you know what that means, waterboarding,
always a crowd favorite.
Oh, yeah, drinking this,
you like it, you like it.
(water spilling)
(Sandberg pants)
For fucking spilled you, Chris, come on.
On bowels, you know
what that means, Chris,
now, breathe through your nose,
breath through your nose,
suck it and suck it,
suck it.
(bright epic music)
(wheel clicks)
(soft suspenseful music)
(bright epic music)
Close your eyes, close your eyes.
Yeah.
So, look at you.
You are gonna be so
fucking raw, yeah, raw.
(soft suspenseful music)
There you go, yeah, fight (indistinct).
Fuck!
Mother!
Still, with your eyes closed.
Yeah, let me see (laughs).
You're gonna love what comes next.
(soft suspenseful music)
You don't have to talk
(Ronald laughs)
That's it.
Come on, baby, you're
showing a little part.
(soft suspenseful music)
Look at the camera, look at the cameras.
The camera next to you, kid.
(epic suspenseful music)
(bright epic music)
(bomb explodes)
Your sham election is a week away,
the noise is unbearable.
(siren wailing)
The frenzy hubris of the left,
they have somehow convinced themselves
Hillary Clinton is going to win.
(buzzer beeps)
(audience laughing)
They believe the average
able minded American
wants that goddamn meat
puppet for a figure head,
that lying duplicitous
ladder climbing cunt.
This old bag can't even stand up straight
without some Bilderberg fist up her ass,
like literally, she's falling
all over the goddamn place
hitting her head left and right,
forgetting which way she's waffled
and every fucking policy
just flip flopped over
in her dog shit career,
and you want this geriatric
power monger matriarch
as your leader, what?
Because she has a fucking
moth balled sausage wallet
and a bottle of Louisiana hot
sauce and a designer purse?
This bitch isn't even a fucking woman,
she's a robot programmed by cockroaches.
If she was a real woman
Bill wouldn't have resorted
to porking miss piggy with
a Cuban in the oval office,
(audience laughing)
She'd have satisfied him.
She'd take a step back and
realize that a strong woman
isn't one who wants to be seen or heard,
but no, she and her flock
unfuckable Kathleen heartbeats
with their stupid cunt brains
and their cunt faces, cunt voices,
put their cankle hamhocks to the pavement
and march for their pig queen
all because Donald Trump
has the balls to talk
like a real fucking man.
- Grabbed by the pussy,
that was locker room talk.
- Grow up,
face reality, play to
your strengths ladies
'cause leadership sure is shit, ain't it?.
Look at the children,
we're raising monsters
because these women are more
concerned with being heard
than rearing responsible
well-adjusted free-thinking people
you're teaching the
entitlement you dark cunts.
Get the fuck back in the kitchen.
Most of you idiots can't
even boil fucking water
let alone change an oil filter.
You're use less,
all you're good for is
marching and moaning,
this needs to end.
This whole movement needs to end
and if she's their figure head,
she needs to end too.
(soft suspenseful music)
Maybe that's it.
Maybe one of you out there
listening is man enough.
(gun firing)
Sacrifice himself
to restore order.
I'd do it myself but I'm needed here,
speaking to truth as aunt
Jamaima Oprah would say.
But one of you,
I know you're out there listening,
you're on the wavelength,
it's buzzing in your ears
burrowing into your brain.
It's not a task or a
chore, it's a mission,
a hero's journey.
One of you needs to man
the fuck up and do it,
now,
because as laughable an idea as it is
to think she could win
this stupid contest,
this is in the end, the nation
that did give you eight years
of a Muslim nigga with
an Armada of drones.
You have seven days my
proud white warriors,
put a bullet in this fucking cunt,
(gun fires)
make it a million
till there's nothing left.
We will speak your name,
Jack the fuck out.
- Cactus Jack, just call
yourself what you are,
a coward.
- You think you're funny, man.
(people chattering)
(bright epic music)
- [Anonymous] To the man who
calls himself Cactus Jack,
we have watched as you
have rocketed to infamy
in a few short weeks via
a supercharged site called
Vitriolic Hateful Rhetoric.
We have watched as you've
published handcrafted propaganda
and laid waste to your
fellow man and woman
for nothing more than
arbitrary color of skin
or country of origin or sexual identity
and now,
we have watched as you have
called for literal blood,
we will watch no longer,
your days are numbered,
your raspberry pie will not protect you.
Your VPN would not shield you,
the dark net will not hide you.
We will find you, we will
reveal you to the world.
You and your kind are finished,
we are Anonymous,
we are Legion,
we do not forgive,
we do not forget,
expect us.
- You think I'm scared of you?
You must be out of your minds.
I scare you.
I'm the one in here, but
you're the cornered animals.
You're quaking in your boots.
You think I'm afraid of you
you rag headed camel fucking sand niggas?
We'll come and get it,
your 72 virgins await.
And you, you toddler-killing blind-firing
car-stealing dope-dealing black monkeys,
you think I'm scared of you
and your empty chest thumping threats
with your black hoods
and black boots and guts?
Lamb's closing his lions,
the whole fucking lot of you,
come and get it.
Your homeys can pour a 40 up in your honor
when I put two in your chest
and one in your nappy-headed skull.
I thought you pansy ass hype-skirt
blue-blood libtard fucks
with your white guilt
and your angry tweets
and your sham elections,
with your parading pink
army of confused queers
and cross-dressers and
come belting, faggots,
and your loud mouth harpy cunt women
with a glass ceiling boo hoo hoo bullshit,
come on, you know you want it, baby.
Let's not forget you baby-eating
reptilian world running
Bohemian Grove Illuminati government fucks
with your false flags and poisoned taps
and overfilled cages, I
know you're listening,
I can hear you breathing,
so come and fucking get it.
You think I haven't been
preparing for this my whole life?
What do you think this is?
You think I haven't killed before?
I'm down here, microphone to mouth
spitting truth out to you
ignorant lost shit birds
day in and day out and
I got an army of my own,
we are a rising tide,
a nation with no borders hiding among you
on your streets, in your neighborhoods
and we're fucking sick of it.
We're sick of your white-guilt, crybaby
forced apology bullshit.
We're sick of your shift with palms up
out for a fucking
handout, whiny nigga shit.
We're sick of you're
backwards desert drilling,
stupid scumbag religions
and you're stinking shitty
birds nest beards and hypocrisy
and pussy ass suicide bombs.
Look me in my fucking eye you cowards.
We're sick of your hand in our pockets
and your picket fences and punch cards
you fascist, empty headed, stuffed suit,
corporate puppet politicians.
You job stealing immigrant fucks.
You dirty drunken rapist cholos
and sad face Syrian leftovers,
fuck you!
Go home!
(soft suspenseful music)
Or better yet
come here
'cause I got something for you too.
You motherfuckers think I'm scared of you?
I will give you my goddamn address,
I'm right here, I'm waiting,
so, come and fucking get me!
(soft suspenseful music)
(door gliding)
Hey, Spielberg, so, you're notice our cat.
Notice how citizens fucking came.
I'm betting you saw that stupid
fucking "Saw" movie there,
didn't you?
(saw clatters)
Kill your friend.
Take care of the balls.
(epic suspenseful music)
(Ronald roars)
Don't worry my jackhammers and jack offs,
they ain't get me yet.
(eerie music)
(Ronald roars)
(soft suspenseful music)
I'm still kicking,
coming to you live from the bunker.
It's been six days since I've eaten
unless you count the fucking spiders,
four since I unplugged.
(soft suspenseful music)
(eerie music)
(Ronald coughs)
I've had a lot of time to
think these past few days
to ruminate
on things I've said, things I've done.
(indistinct)
Unspeakable things,
things for which there
can be no forgiveness,
maybe it's the fucking mineral spirits,
maybe it's the Holy Spirit, I don't know,
I just know that we are
all one, I see that now.
I'm sorry that it took this,
that it had to go so far to see
but I now know that we are all one.
We all bleed red, we're all one.
One race, human beings joined
together by happenstance
or intelligent design, it doesn't matter,
either way, we're here together
on this rock hurtling
through infinite space
at unfathomable speeds
made up of the stuff of stars.
Each of us born innocent
and perfect in our own way,
like snowflakes,
only later corrupted along
the way by our lesser
primordial evolutionary impulses,
by competition, by fear and
anxiety and self doubt, by ego.
It's our responsibility as humans,
as members of the human race
to bask in the shared experience,
to lend a hand no matter
its color or creed,
to help one another,
to exist in harmony and peace
and love above all else,
for the children, if not for ourselves.
(Ronald laughing)
(soft somber music)
Donald Trump is now our
president as I foretold.
You assholes said it was impossible.
You hottie ignorant fucks,
you bloated smug know
nothings, I called it,
I was right about that
just like I'm right about everything else,
but remember, that's not
all I said was coming.
With the Donald comes the
final reckoning fucktards.
Every fucking nigga,
cunt, kike, spit, goop,
libtard, faggot, all of you are gonna fry,
lock and load my proud white
warriors, stay vigilant,
they're coming from me,
they wanna silence me,
they want me dead
for giving voice to the same thoughts
you had inside your
heads every fucking day.
That means they want you dead too.
They wanna silence you same as me
and not just your tongue and your mind,
they wanna control what
you're allowed to think
let alone say,
they wanna control what
you can tell and teach
your beautiful white children,
they wanna be celebrated
and they want you to pay
but they're the ones who are gonna pay.
They're coming for me and you,
you, my jackhammers, you have a chance,
you have right now to secure
the safety of your banner
and your race.
You have a job and it's
your responsibility
as a member of the white...
Wait, what the fuck was
that, did you hear that?
(soft suspenseful music)
(epic suspenseful music)
I see you Spielberg, back
in your fucking hole.
(epic suspenseful music)
(gun cocks)
(epic suspenseful music)
(door bangs)
(gun fires)
(gun bangs)
(door clicks)
(dog barks)
I'm a little old man
With a little old plan
And the little old dream come true
Every time I look into your eyes
And say I love you
And the that I'd use
And the
And I want you kiss
you on that sunny side
Jubilee, Jubilee
I love you, you love me
Rolling on doing wrong
I'm a little old man
With a little old plan
And the little old dream come true
Every time I look into your eyes
And say I love you
(soft music)
And the
I'm a little old man
With a little old plan
And the little old dream come true
Every time I look
into your eyes and say
Every time I look
into your eyes and say
Every time I look
into your eyes and say
I love you
- [Man] Baba Booey.