Coyote vs. Acme (2026) Movie Script
1
I
need to get a message out.
I know too much.
They're not going to let us leave.
I'm sending for help.
Everything is going to be okay,
my little Tweety.
I promise.
You can jump or we can push you.
Someday the truth will be known.
Everyone,
what's that thing in the sky?
I don't know.
I'll just shoot it down.
Lock on target.
Clear to engage.
Beep, beep, beep.
Beep, beep, beep.
Beep, beep, beep.
Have you gotten into a
catapult hoping to be gently and
sensibly flown to a destination
of your choosing only to be
violently piledrived
face first into the ground?
Have you ever sat a big stack of TNT on
the road hoping to blow up your nemesis?
But when you press the detonator,
the detonator itself explodes?
Have you ever pulled the
ripcord of your parachute
and only a bunch of silverware comes out?
It's not your fault.
There's probably someone to blame.
June.
Maltese.
Justice!
Two for Tuesdays.
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Hey, wreck a ball smash!
I could probably get you 250 bucks for
that.
See you next week!
Thank you for calling Avery Jones and
Maltese.
If you've been hit by an anvil,
press 1.
If you've been electrocuted, press 2.
If you've been crushed by a falling piano,
press 3.
Good morning.
It's almost 3.
Huh.
Good morning, Dottie.
Not now.
Do they have the paperwork?
Sal?
Hey, kid.
Did you sleep in that suit again?
Good eye.
I've been waiting for you!
Hi.
I have found some catastrophic fires,
coincidentally all near match factories,
and I really think it's
a great opportunity
to help a lot of people with one case.
How long is this internship again?
Uh, three more months.
Just enough time to really dig in and make
a difference.
You know, you really remind
me of when I was fresh out
of law school, and I mean
that in the worst possible way.
And I will take that as a compliment.
Oh, no, look!
You've got this.
You know, I'm gonna do you a favor,
because you're my niece.
And I want you to have a happy life.
Stop.
At Oxford... I have a feeling I'm
gonna be hearing that phrase a lot.
At Oxford, they really stress the
importance of the law on everyday lives.
And all you're really having me do right
now is brainstorm
ideas for your billboards.
Yeah.
You're new here, so you don't know that
this file goes right over here.
And that, my friend, is freedom.
I really want to pick it up.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
And I really want to file it
alphabetically.
No, you will not.
Please.
You've got a new client in the conference
room.
He seems unhinged.
Good luck.
Mr. Coyote?
Coyote?
Coyote.
All right, well, uh...
How can I help you?
Oh, one of my billboards.
Costs a lot of money to put those up.
So you've been in an accident?
Do you not talk?
Oh, but you have signs.
I don't, uh, understand.
All right.
Is that supposed to be you?
And who's that?
Uh, okay, what are you...
Not entirely necessary to do all that,
but, uh, okay.
Uh, so, seems like we're talking about
some, uh, faulty rocket skates that, uh...
backfired when you were trying to capture
a bird that you have some sort of...
sordid history with?
So, uh, do you have the rocket skates?
Okay, great.
So, we're gonna write in your name as the
plaintiff.
Then we'll say we're asking for,
uh, I don't know, $300.
Three hundred.
And here, we'll write in the name of the
company that, uh, made the skates.
Let me guess.
Acme.
But they're great to deal with for little
stuff like this.
We just drop your skates in a box...
type up a complaint... and boom!
You're the richest coyote in the country.
All I need is a signature.
Or you just want to lick it.
That's probably fine, too.
Here we go.
Oh.
Wait!
Mr. Coyote!
Hey!
Somebody grab that guy!
Mr. Coyote!
Look!
I just need you to sign the...
It's an Acme stapler?
I guess that is how staplers work.
Good God.
Okay.
I get it.
There are problems with Acme's cartoon
products.
I see it all the time.
I mean, I'm surprised.
Acme makes my phone and my car.
Why would they also make this?
No, this is just silly stuff for cartoons,
you know?
What's the worst that could really happen?
They see some birds whipping around their
heads?
Well, it doesn't seem that silly to me.
Paige, this is a run-of-the-mill $300
rocket skate case.
Trust me.
Ben, doesn't that mean that's a pile of
$300 cases?
Oh, come on.
I don't know.
Paige, come on.
Do you know what would
happen if we submitted
all this stuff as evidence together?
We'd have a giant lawsuit on our hands.
That would be amazing.
And if you could prove
a causal connection,
then really the sky's the limit.
The sky is not the limit.
All right?
The limit is, like, right here.
We don't do massive cases.
We do quick and easy.
All right?
Huh.
Where did all this stuff go?
So, Mr. Coyote?
My professional opinion
is that this... What?
This case is worth, you know, a few
hundred dollars.
And I can see if they will replace the
rockets case.
So I'm going to need you to sign this.
Rude.
All right.
Well, it was nice meeting you.
Do you mind putting the evidence box into
the system?
I'm going to lunch.
Here you go.
Into evidence, please.
All right.
What have we got here?
Geez.
Someone's suing for a lot.
Excuse me.
Cartoon products cases go down to the
basement.
Governor, these threats are tantamount to
black men.
The law is completely on our side here.
Because we wrote the law.
Okay.
Great to catch up.
Better be straight away on the Plappinger
case.
Oh, it's done.
Let's just say his next vacation will be
in prison, but I got something else.
Cartoon case?
Basement.
Yeah, I think you need to see this one.
They're suing us for every Acme cartoon
product.
Who?
I wasn't familiar with the name.
Okay.
Look, just pay me the money you owe me,
or I'll sue you for breach of contract.
Okay, I gotta go.
I'll call you later, Mom.
Well, well, well.
It isn't our resident hot shot.
What does that mean?
Serving Acme for every one of their
cartoon products.
Yeah, right.
Do I look like that?
You're looking at the guy who would take
on the biggest corporation in the world.
You're looking at the guy who is taking on
the biggest corporation in the world.
Channel 4 News has
just learned that papers
were filed today against
the Acme Corporation.
Buddy Crane, Acme's chief legal counsel,
declined to comment.
How did this happen?
It's okay.
It's okay.
It's exciting.
All eyes on you, ready to show them what
you got.
Paige, when we sue Acme for some little
thing, nobody even notices.
We're a tiny item on a spreadsheet.
But this?
This went to Buddy Crane.
Who?
Buddy Crane.
He's only, like, the best lawyer in the
country.
Okay.
Went to law school together, and he is a
total machine.
Built like an ox, his
mind is sharp as a tack,
trims his fingernails with a switchblade.
You know, I once saw him eat
a lobster... Well, I ate lobster.
...while it was still alive.
Not even sure that's legal.
What could I have possibly done to deserve
all this?
Did I piss off a witch?
Oh, no.
We could.
How did this happen?
I just typed up everything that was inside
the box.
And I just brought the box inside.
I've just been working on my short game.
I've been on hold for two hours trying to
win tickets to the country jubilee.
You.
Do you have any idea what you've done?
You have put me in such a horrible
position.
Oh.
Hi.
This is my old friend, Kevin.
Yeah, it's been a while.
Look at you, shaking things up.
Well, not intentionally shaking,
really.
I think we should have a face-to-face,
don't you?
Your face and my face?
Be in my office.
Fifteen minutes.
Get things right as rain.
Okay.
Sounds looking forward to it.
From its humble roots
as a cartoon anvil factory,
Acme has become America's
greatest success story.
Acme, I say, Acme is an innovation
factory.
We create the impossible.
With each new product, we revolutionize
industry and the world.
We're a company of family values that
values its family of companies.
Acme.
Hey.
I don't know what your deal is, but I
need you to listen to me very carefully.
Stop.
You are going to follow my lead.
All right.
We're going to tell them this is all just
a big misunderstanding, and we're looking
to get this settled as quickly as
possible.
We will be polite.
We will not detonate explosives.
All right.
If they put something in front of us,
we will sign it.
Got it?
Mr. Avery.
Bill Pelicanos.
And Mr. Coyote.
I'll take you to see Buddy.
So I hear you guys were friends from back
in the day, huh?
Guess you could say that if you were
incorrect.
And look at this guy going clothing
optional.
Hey, Buddy.
Look who's here.
This is Mr. Billboard.
How you been, man?
Good.
Yeah.
Very good.
Those were the days, weren't they?
Yeah.
Harvard Law.
You look... good.
Thank you.
Have a seat.
Okay.
I gotta say, I was a bit surprised to see
your name on a case of this size.
Me too.
I mean, I'm so sorry about all this.
It was just a big misunderstanding.
Well, we got a really busy day around
here.
And I would hate to keep you from getting
back to whatever it is you do.
Yeah.
Law stuff, too.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Sure.
Oh, my God.
And this seems obvious, but I have to say
that ACME denies all charges and accepts
no liability or causal connection between
Mr. Coyote's colorful injuries and our
state-of-the-art and life-enhancing family
products.
Yeah, yeah.
Blah, blah, blah.
And, you know, as much fun
as it would be to get back in a
courtroom with you, I think
it's time to do what you do best.
Settle.
Yeah.
Well, look, thank you so much.
And I'm so sorry for taking up all your
time.
It was unintentional.
I...
Uh...
Uh...
No, no, no.
He didn't mean that.
Do you have another copy?
Is this a joke?
No.
No.
This is not funny.
I thought cartoons were supposed to be
funny.
Gaston, do you want to fight, Avery?
Your tiny firm is unmatched.
We'll tie you in legal loopholes.
We'll bury you in paperwork.
I'll put a dozen of my best lawyers in
this 24 hours a day to make sure your name
is more synonymous with failure than it
already is.
Oh, and I almost forgot.
We don't validate parking!
Do you know what you could do with 50,000
dollars?
Do you have any idea how many birds you
could buy with that?
Flocks!
You know what?
Not that it really matters, but I'm out.
Yeah.
That's right.
I quit, man.
I'm going to find another lawyer.
And this is already my
personal frickin nightmare, and
I'm not sticking around to
see if it can get any worse.
Butterfingers.
No!
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait.
Why didn't you settle?
That's what we do here.
We settle.
Dottie, what do we do here?
We settle.
Okay, I tried to settle, but he wouldn't
let me settle.
He's a coyote.
We're not even trial lawyers.
I have a miniature golf
tournament this weekend, so
I don't even know if I'm
gonna make it in on Monday.
Plus, trial prep adds up.
Photocopies in this economy.
But if we beat Acme, then we can afford a
ton of photocopies.
We won't beat Acme.
I mean, nobody ever has, and nobody ever
will.
The truth is, even if you quit
right now, the firm is already
in the hole for Acme's legal
fees, and that's just from today.
I mean, that could close down our doors.
Look, if we lose, we lose.
If we quit, we really lose.
A lot of money.
One true goal for this trial.
It's this.
We can't look like fools, all right?
Our job is not to win this case.
Our job is to win this case.
Our job is to still be in business when
it's over.
That's the spirit.
We'll talk like lawyers.
What do real lawyers do?
They would find evidence and start making
a list of witnesses.
The bird.
He did witness every time an Acme product
malfunctioned.
He could corroborate Wiley's story.
Sure, whatever.
Add the Roadrunner to our witness list.
One more thing.
Um, where is Mr. Coyote gonna stay?
Fine, boss, be free!
All right, don't give me that look.
Yeah.
I live in a motel.
Look, I got pool access.
Uh... You know, there's no
mortgage... Never have to make my bed.
There's an incredible all-you-can-eat
seafood buffet around the corner.
Uh, tissues come out of a Daarum wall.
Ha.
Hi, Jerry.
Yeah, hi,
I need another room for a few nights.
Not near me, please.
He's not a pet.
He looks like a pet.
Who rents a separate room for their pets?
Cherry, come on.
I've been living here for almost five
years.
You know me.
No pets.
Okay.
You want to do this?
Legally speaking, a pet is a
domesticated or tamed animal
kept as a companion in or
outside an individual's residence.
This is Mr. Coyote.
He is my client.
He's not my pet nor anyone's pet in the
eyes of the law.
And as such, that sign or any rule that
accompanies it does not apply to him.
All right?
It does not say no animals.
And just my unbiased
opinion, he may actually
have a case against
you for discrimination.
Yeah.
He pees on the rug.
It's on you.
All right, deal.
But I would need a full workup of urine
analysis.
I mean, it's a motel.
Plenty of people pee on the rug.
Oh, right next door.
Of course.
Coming
up next, a mouse breaks the sound barrier
in Guadalajara.
One week more to catch Albuquerque's
annual carrot festival.
While it's still in town, are you having
fun?
We are.
You're kind of a psychopath, aren't you?
Watch and learn.
So we take the subpoena like so.
Just cover it with copious amounts of
birdseed.
Roadrunner eats the birdseed, grabs a
subpoena, and boom.
He's legally obligated to show up to
court.
Instant Roadrunner trap.
He's got a gun.
Beep, beep.
Is this some kind of inside thing with you
guys?
Is everyone clear on our plan?
No.
Nah.
Yes.
Paige, what's our plan?
So we have to prove to a jury that acne
cartoon products are at fault for every
accident that Wiley's had going back
years.
So we are going to take pictures and we're
going to gather evidence.
And we're going to put the evidence in
little bags.
And we're going to interview experts and
witnesses.
And we're going to highlight big books of
photocopied documents.
And we're going to pound the pavement and
we're going to study up.
And we're going to try and catch our big
eyewitness by leaving
a nice note in the desert.
And if we follow my
plan by the end of this,
we'll have enough
evidence to take acne down.
We really have nothing.
I mean, I kind of assumed that we'd have
nothing, but this is nothing.
All rise.
The Court of the Second Judicial Circuit
of Albuquerque is now in session.
The Honorable Judge Trapa Grosso presided.
You may be seated.
Human.
Human.
Quiet!
My name is Judge Trapa Grosso.
The name of the case is Coyote versus
Acme.
I am not a loosey-goosey judge.
I am a no-nonsense, no-silly-stuff judge.
Is that understood?
Yes.
Mr. Crane.
We live in a great country, don't we?
Because it's one that values freedom above
all else.
You're free to live your life any way you
see fit.
Could mean living in the desert.
Out in a cave.
Spending your days chasing after a bird.
Who is much, much faster than you.
But that, that is your right.
As an American.
But that freedom, it comes with great
responsibility.
If you were to take a
missile, for instance,
and you were to glue handlebars to it.
Well, that's, that's your choice.
But we expect you to
understand that that missile and
those handlebars, they
aren't designed to catch birds.
What I will prove to this jury is that
man, Wile E.
Coyote, he is reckless.
And all of his injuries are
self-inflicted.
I mean, we won't condemn him, you or I.
We all know who's responsible.
As clear as the desert sky.
I think I just laid an egg.
God bless America.
God bless the troops.
Damn, that was really good.
Oh, uh, please don't write that down.
And, and, please don't write that down.
Or, or, that down.
Mr. Avery.
Um, now, uh, now what, what did the,
uh, defense say we're gonna argue?
Huh?
I mean, I know the answer to it.
I know the answer.
I'm not asking you a question.
I mean, it is, it is a question.
But it's a question that I'm asking to me.
Let me start over.
Let me start over.
Objection.
To my start.
So the defense said that we were gonna
argue that, uh, the
products are dangerous.
And that acne is negligent in,
uh, selling them.
I, I do really agree with all that.
I mean, it's not fancy, but it's true.
Um, if, uh, sorry.
One second, please.
One sec...
Wiley, we don't need evidence right now.
Mr. Avery.
Okay, okay.
Excuse me, Your Honor.
My client would like me to show you this
defective acne rocket skate.
And as you can see, there's a faulty on
switch.
Nothing.
God bless America.
God, uh, bless the troops.
Opening arguments today in Coyote v.
Acme.
Sources close to the case report that Acme
is doing a fantastic job protecting their
brand and dignity, while the plaintiff
appears hungry and afraid.
More after this.
One week more to catch
Albuquerque's annual
carrot festival while it's still in town.
Yeah?
241, we've been getting noise complaints
about a loud TV.
Seriously?
It's the TV you're having a problem with.
Okay, I'll turn it...
Are you having fun?
We, uh...
Cherry, I turned it off.
Meem.
What's up, Doc?
Who's this?
I, uh, can't tell you.
I want to, but I can't.
A pickle, ain't it?
You sure you have the right number?
Your trial.
I think I may be able to help you with
Acme.
What?
I have information that could stop Acme.
For good.
Oh my God, you could stop this case?
If this gets out, it'll all be over.
I have an associate with information.
If they figure out what he knows,
he's a sitting duck.
Well, who?
Where do I find him?
Write this down.
I'm only gonna say it once.
Okay, okay.
Grabbing a pen.
Hang on, hang on.
666 Gary Road Drive.
That doesn't sound like a place I want to
go.
Look for a check.
Acme has ears and eyes and ears
everywhere.
And they've made people disappear.
Don't forget that.
I won't.
Will I be able to contact you again?
Mr. Leghorn.
Buddy, I say buddy, you little rascal,
you.
That was Bora Bora.
The tax haven's so nice, they named it
twice.
So I say I heard we have ourselves a
lawsuit in the animated sector.
Talk to PR about this.
You know, it's a local paper.
And pretty flattering.
You know, I'm gonna win this case as fast
as I can.
But in the meantime,
I think things like this
make us look pretty
good in the public eye.
Not ideal, but you know, it's like killing
two birds with one stone.
Uh, one stone.
Two birds, one stone.
What a vile expression.
I only... Rotten.
We both know it would be very,
I say very unpleasant for everyone
involved if anything bigger, I say bigger,
were to become public.
Oh, mysterious collar.
It's so cool.
So what do you sound like?
I don't know.
He's kind of like, eh, what's up,
doc?
I have information.
Chomp, chomp, chomp.
He's like chewing on a cracker or
something.
Okay.
Well, math is saying it should be right
here.
It's just a wall.
Jack!
God.
Is there a Jack anywhere?
Wait.
What's that?
Oh, that kind of Jack.
Somebody's got a sense of humor.
There's a duck, and he is sitting.
Feels a bit easy.
Well, good thing I like easy.
Excuse me.
Hi, uh, my name is Kevin Avery.
This is Paige.
I'm a personal injury attorney.
Well, look who decided to show up.
Oh, great.
Thank you.
I wasn't sure if you knew we were coming.
You're a little late, and you're still
wearing that hideous suit.
Take your pants off right over there,
please, and, um, strike a pose.
Uh, no.
It's so difficult to find nude models
these days.
Sit down.
Uh... Lasperella?
Eh, we're all right.
Thank you.
Disrobe and pretend you're thinking.
I expect this is going to take a few
hours.
Yeah, um, we had an
anonymous caller say that
you might have some important information.
Yeah, information that can help us end our
case quickly.
Information?
Yes.
About acne?
Acne?
Uh, yes.
Acne.
Acme?
Acme?
After all this, they call me Staffy?
The world is Staffy!
Acme?
Ac-you!
You'll never get it out of me!
I'll tell you everything.
Your face is covered in acne!
He really shouldn't be here.
I agree, Doctor.
Not staring at Sophia
for any, uh, pantsless modeling gig.
Look, I'm a horse!
I'm a horse!
Well, we drove him crazy and we got... a
canipate.
Well, it could be important.
Clearly, he's been holding
onto this for a while, so... Wait.
That's all, folks.
Are we the folks?
Do you think we're gonna get kidnapped?
Held to ransom?
I feel so alive!
So, what do you think it is?
Thanks.
That looks unspeakably dangerous.
And yet he walked in anyway.
Wait, what are you doing?
I'm following Wily.
Now I just look like a loser if I stay out
here.
Coming into the tunnel.
Hello?
I bet they don't tell you
to walk down mysterious
tunnels in your fancy classes at Oxford.
I bet they discourage you, actually.
Actually, I thought about majoring in
mysterious tunnels.
No, you didn't.
Yeah, I did.
What have we got here?
I found a message!
What does it say?
It says, Daffy, I'm not sure how long I
have.
I hope this message gets to you.
Things have gone awry with Project
Sisyphus.
Sisyphus?
What is Project Sisyphus?
Acme is watching my every move,
and I have a feeling I'm in grave danger.
If
you see this message, please send help.
Dr. Laurie.
Captain!
Crane!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Did I not say unspeakably dangerous?
Didn't I say those exact words?
No.
I did.
Okay.
What could this mean?
Project Sisyphus?
I don't know.
I don't know.
All right.
What?
What just happened?
What?
Boss, I think they're on to us.
Okay.
So Sisyphus is from Greek mythology.
And he was punished by the gods and made
to roll a boulder up a hill every day.
But it would just roll right back down for
eternity.
Huh.
And it was also what Daffy was painting.
So what?
That's not evidence.
None of this is going to help us win a
trial.
All right.
This is... It's all just a waste of our
time.
We have a client who, no offense,
can't read a warning label.
We have piles and piles of stuff that he
himself broke.
We have nothing, Paige.
Well, you've been settling Acme cases for
years.
And you have never stopped to think and
see a pattern.
A pattern?
Yes.
My clients go boom, and two seconds later,
they're fine.
Nobody cares.
So that makes it okay?
Boom, $100, that's fair?
This case can make it right.
This is your opportunity to really show
people what you're capable of.
Yeah, but that only works if I don't lose.
And why do you assume you're going to
lose?
Are you kidding?
It is really super easy to lose.
And it's better you learn that now.
You know, everyone thought I was crazy for
coming here.
But I didn't want to just go to some big
law firm and help the
rich guys get richer.
I thought...
I thought you were actually still a real
lawyer.
Yeah, me too.
So, uh, what is it about the Roadrunner?
There are no words.
You know, I envy you, really.
You know, it must be nice to have such a
clear goal.
I mean, I used to have that, I think.
You know, I was hungry, and I was chasing.
But I didn't like the pressure of having
to always win.
And I got burnt out on trying.
Anyway, you're a really good listener.
Hey!
What are you doing?
Stop!
Wiley!
Stop!
Stop!
Ah!
There's a trap!
Stop!
Stop!
Stop!
Stop!
Stop!
We were having a heart-to-heart!
Wait!
Wiley!
You can't make that jump!
Wiley!
You made it.
Well, you go a long way to make a point.
Hey, Wiley.
Thanks.
I'll see you tomorrow.
Are you sitting down?
Uh, yes.
Well, Sal's not.
Is that gonna be a problem?
Wiley is conning us.
The only reason he's doing this case is to
catch and kill the
Roadrunner during the trial.
That's not good.
It's all just part of a plot.
He's just using us so he'll put the bird
on the witness stand.
If the Roadrunner shows up to court,
it'll be chaos.
I'll look like a fool.
If the firm will fold, we'll be mattress
salesmen.
That's kind of demeaning to mattress
salesmen.
Fine.
We'll be, uh, garbage men.
Come in.
Okay.
Garbage people.
My dad's garbage people.
Okay.
I'm just really nervous about letting
Wiley back into this courtroom.
Without Wiley, there's no trial.
With no trial, there's no firm.
And without the firm, we
are... We gonna be broke.
I hate to suggest lying
to a dog, but you're gonna
have to convince him that
the Roadrunner will be there.
Paige, I was wrong.
See what you can find out about Project
Sisyphus and how it's connected to ACME.
Great.
I'm already on it.
Okay.
Hi.
I was just wondering if a Dr. Laurie still
lives here?
They listen, you know.
Would you like some tea, dearie?
It was a very happy marriage.
He used to work long days,
but would still come home and
play the piano for me for
hours, because he loved me.
He knew how much I loved it.
We had 87 years together.
I am grateful.
Um, when did Dr. Laurie pass away,
if you don't mind me asking?
Oh, he's not dead.
He's missing.
He went to work one day with our little
bird, and I never saw
either of them again.
They told me he ran off with his
secretary, but I don't think so.
His secretary was a penguin.
What can you tell me about Project
Sisyphus?
What?
Which day what?
Oh, which day is the Roadrunner
testifying?
Any day now.
Why, do you have any particular reason for
wanting to catch up with him?
Okay, well, I'll keep you posted.
I need this Roadrunner.
Absolutely.
Why exactly?
He's the only one that's seen every time
this moron's used our
products incorrectly.
I had to bet.
He's holding a grudge.
Go out there and you burn with me.
How hard could it be to catch a bird?
Heh, heh, heh.
I am sick.
I will punch a baby
bear in his... Give me lip.
I'm gonna send you to the yard.
Get a stick.
Make a switch.
I can end the conversation real quick.
I've been a liar.
I can kick a lion in his crack.
I'm the... I will fall off in your crib.
Take a deep.
Hit your... On the... Get your... My
husband was the head inventor of animated
products at Acme.
He was so excited when he got the job.
He wanted to make things that really
helped cartoons.
Like the anti-lump pump.
An eraser of stinky lines.
Oh, and this anti-predator spray.
Hello?
After a while, things changed.
He didn't like what was going on.
And then he disappeared.
Recently, I've been getting phone calls.
Sometimes they hang
up, but sometimes... Me?
What's up, doc?
I don't know the man on the telephone.
I don't know where my dear husband is.
But I know Project Sisyphus is the reason
he's gone.
Project Roadkill in T-3...
2... 1... Sir, this is the
target looking at us.
Meep, meep.
Did we catch him?
So...
Obviously...
We hit a speed bump.
Does it itch?
Yes.
But I'm afraid to touch it.
You eyes and ears out there.
What happened?
What did you see?
Well, I taught Utah.
You taught Utah?
I don't pay you to tink Utah.
I pay you to talk.
Utah!
Utah?
Or you taught Utah?
Because you just said you taught Utah.
I did.
I did talk.
What did you teach?
What did you talk?
A breakdown on the eastern perimeter.
Ultimately, that's where he ran off.
That roadrunner is very, very fast,
sir.
No!
Step your game up, Bird.
They're getting too close.
I don't just want him scared.
I want him ruined.
I want him to stop digging around.
You know what happened to Dr. Lorry.
You want the same thing to happen to your
granny.
No!
Please!
I'll get him tonight!
I... I...
Hey, great job, big dog.
Shut up, Patches!
Absolutely, sir.
Want to say another word?
No!
No!
Doctor Lorry, will you listen to me?
I really need you tonight.
Uh, uh, uh... An detective will
help me with today's search!
Uh, uh... I wish I could say more, but
Acme has ears and
eyes and ears everywhere.
That's evidence.
Okay, that's enough.
Wiley, Wiley, Wiley.
Stop that.
Is there some kind of plan to this?
There it is.
Wait.
I know this song.
From where?
I don't know.
It's like a TV show or an ad or...
Wait.
Albuquerque's annual Carrot Festival.
Okay.
What is that?
A festival of carrots in Albuquerque.
It happens every year, annually.
Hello?
Mystery caller?
Mystery caller, who called me?
Tell him we're from Avery Jones and
Maltese.
We're from Avery Jones and Maltese.
You can show yourself at any time.
So, uh, what is up, Doc?
Who's there?
I'll never tell you, Mac.
I'm a creature of the night, a shadow that
moves.
You'll never figure out who I am.
Oh, my.
Oh, heavens.
You've seen my face.
Don't look at me.
I'm too... beautiful.
Mystery caller?
I tell you, the budget
has been bumbling and
stumbling your way
through this case for weeks.
You're lucky you have me on your side.
Hey, you been followed?
Got eyes on you?
Caught by a red light camera?
Spotted by a drone?
Have you been... bugged?
This is just getting embarrassing now.
Look, I got, like, a million questions for
you.
Why didn't you call again?
What happened to Dr. Laurie?
And what can you tell us about Project
Sisyphus?
Enough with the questions, Counselor.
This calls for a flashback.
Dr. Laurie was the head inventor of acne
cartoon products, you see.
He built some amazing things.
Essentials, like the quick change machine.
One day, they sent an executive from
corporate to oversee things.
The guy was a real toy.
Suddenly, there was a lot of secrets.
They called it Project Sisyphus.
Under the new management, the test became
increasingly reckless.
I'm not sure I understand.
What was it all for?
They weren't inventing products for
cartoons.
They were using cartoons to invent
products.
Dr. Laurie told them this was wrong, and
that their tests were harmful to cartoons.
He pleaded with them to put an end to it.
But instead, they put an end to him.
Everyone who worked on
Project Sisyphus is either
missing, were forced to
work for acne, or quacked.
And when did the program end?
Don't you see?
It never ended.
It evolved.
Instead of testing
dangerous products in the
lab, they let them
out into the real world.
Yes.
Wiley's rocket skates, they were designed
to backfire.
Now you're getting it.
The more something breaks,
the more a cartoon gets hurt,
the more data to make better
acne products for humans.
Exactly, exactly.
Wiley, you're what they call a high usage
user.
They let you boom and splat and bang for
years and years.
Knowing full well the toll.
Would you testify to this in court?
The world needs to hear this.
No, no, no.
You need someone on the inside to spill
the beans.
Get the head of PR at Acme to testify.
He's a master of spin.
His name is... Uh-oh.
That's my cue.
They didn't.
Hey, if anyone asks,
tell them your informant
was a little hunter with a funny hat.
We're all counting on you.
Bye.
Yeah, that's great.
No one's going to get through that door.
Any added security is great.
Will you tell us your role at Acme for the
record?
Okay, great.
If he says anything wrong, we'll get him
out of here.
Done.
And what does your role as PR
representative entail?
Well, Acme.
So you have authority to speak for Acme.
What can you tell us about Project
Sisyphus?
Mr. Devil, what is Project Sisyphus?
Project Sisyphus, may I remind you,
you are under oath.
Puddin'!
Objection?
Counselors, approach the bench.
This case is turning my courtroom into a
circus.
They just ejected my witness!
We don't know that.
Uh... The devil!
I couldn't agree more.
I'd like to file a motion to exclude all
evidence submitted by the prosecution.
Save the original pair of rocket skates.
All else is overreaching.
Motion granted.
Are you kidding?
Thank you, your honor.
Now in response, I'd like to file a motion
for dismissal due to lack of evidence.
Motion granted.
I'm tired of all this bunk.
You're not allowed to say that.
That's the beauty of being a judge.
I can say whatever I want.
Mis-trial?
There, I said it.
Case dismissed.
Case dismissed.
It
was a miscarriage of justice, but it was
not a surprise.
The Acme Corporation has
knowingly been putting dangerous
products into the hands
of cartoons for decades.
Acme has gone to great
lengths to cover up an
insidious plot that they
call Project Sisyphus.
They have threatened the safety of myself
and my client.
Look.
Bombs, boulders, pianos.
They will stop at nothing.
But myself and my associates, we will keep
fighting.
I mean, these companies think they can do
whatever they want
and get away with all of it.
Because they do.
We're sick of it.
And it stops now.
So we're getting ready to launch a...
Excuse me a moment.
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Wiley!
More chaos in court today after the Acme
trial was dismissed.
By the very fair and honorable Judge Tropo
Grosso.
The plaintiffs made their objections known
by wrestling a six-foot cartoon rocket.
It's all good.
Nothing to see here.
Is that your car?
Hey, Paige.
Have you seen?
What?
Your speech.
It's the number one trending news item in
the country right now.
It's everywhere.
What?
Do you like my speech?
Well, and the car exploding, I think is a
part of it.
What?
Well...
I I I get it.
I I I I I
Wait, where are you going?
What?
Wiley, no, you can't go.
I need you in DC.
I mean, this is the big showdown.
If you don't show up, there's no hearing.
This whole thing will have been for
nothing.
The Roadrunner will be there.
Yeah, of course, he'll be there.
Yeah, he's coming.
I promise.
I promise.
It's over.
Come on.
What do you say?
The whole world will be watching.
And he'll be there.
All right.
Good.
Come on.
Let's go.
What initially seemed
to be a case of routine
product malfunction has
turned into a David vs.
Goliath tale as old as time.
We'd like to wish our furry little friend
good luck in DC.
We're rooting for you, Wiley.
And we always were.
Next time on Day One...
When a company is this successful, there's
always someone looking to tear it down.
But our hands are clean.
Flight attendants prepare for landing.
Sorry about that initial wrong turn out of
Albuquerque, folks.
No more warrants.
I don't care if you kidnap him, run him
out of town, or throw him down a hole, No.
Wiley Coyote will not be at the hearing
tomorrow.
Are we clear?
Yes, boss.
We'll clear.
Please be quiet.
Wiley, please be quiet.
Look, I promise you what I have to do is
more important than what you have to do.
There's been a change of plans.
He... he couldn't make it, right?
Fine.
You think I would drag
the Roadrunner out here so
you could destroy me in
front of the entire world?
Yeah, I know you just wanted him in that
courtroom so you could
catch him and eat him.
Why would I help you do that?
Okay, yeah, I lied.
I lied.
I needed you to stay with this case.
But you know what?
You lied to me.
Huh?
You misled me.
You made me think that this case was about
something.
And it is.
You know, this is way bigger than the
Roadrunner.
Did you not even process what the rabbit
said?
You're a high-usage user.
I mean, look at all this stuff.
You're addicted.
Every explosion, every time you fell to
the bottom of a canyon, Acme wanted that.
You know, I changed around my whole life
for you.
My entire routine.
You're probably all gonna blow up in my
face because you wanted a drumstick.
Oh, myself?
You have only cared about your plan this
entire time.
Oh, the Roadrunner.
The Roadrunner.
I'm so sick of this Roadrunner.
You're never gonna catch him!
Okay?
You just... you really aren't.
Just stop trying.
Yeah?
Hey, Kev.
Look, I didn't want to have to tell you
this right before the hearing, but, uh.
..
We've spent every last cent on this trial.
We're out of money.
So, what does that mean?
It means, unless there's
some kind of miracle,
there's not gonna be
a firm to come back to.
I made you guys appointments to donate
plasma next week.
I can't go.
I don't want to put this kind of pressure
on you.
We just thought you should know.
Okay.
Uh,
what is the holdup?
He's in the bathroom.
Looks like you had a rough night,
huh?
Oh, thanks for your believable concern.
Come on.
Do you really want to go out there?
I mean...
All those cameras?
Pressure?
What is this?
It's everything you ever wanted.
Freedom from responsibility.
That's no strings attached.
That is under the table.
That's for you.
All I gotta do is walk out this door right
now.
I mean, come on.
I really want to just keep doing the same
thing over and over again.
Try, fail, try, fail.
Expecting a different result.
I just realized that, uh...
Yeah.
I do.
You get the gist.
Oh my god, you look like a stuntman.
Is Wiley here?
He's not with you?
I haven't seen him since
we were going 80 miles
an hour on the highway
strapped to a refrigerator.
What the hell?
I thought you guys were in the hotel room
next to me.
I feel so left out.
I really screwed up.
He knows the roadrunner's not coming.
He knows I lied.
Ugh.
I'm a jerk.
I should have been honest with him.
It just seemed easier.
Mr. Aveway.
Uh, thank you.
Thank you for joining us today.
We are here to determine whether or not
Acme products are a danger to society.
Uh, where was your client?
I'm, uh, not entirely sure, to be honest.
Senator Fudd, the fact that Mr. Coyote
hasn't deemed it necessary to grace us
with his presence at the
scheduled time should
tell you all you need to
know about his character.
Hmm.
I think this does tell us a lot.
Look.
My client has a long history with Acme.
He's been using their products for
decades.
Why is that, if they're so... dangerous?
Well, he doesn't have a choice,
really.
Acme has a monopoly over all the tools
required for Mr. Coyote's work.
His work?
I have here that he's unemployed and
living in a cave.
It's true.
It's true.
It's a fact.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
Pursuant to Sylvester V.
Gonzales, chase by predator is a legal
occupation under the law.
He may not get a salary, but he works.
In fact, he's one of the most hardworking
people I've ever met.
And he's brave.
He will walk out onto the tiniest rope
over the largest canyon.
He'll straddle a rocket that he's glued
handlebars to without batting an eye.
I mean...
Uh...
Sorry.
Look.
When Mr. Coyote first
walked into my office, I
was the laziest person
you could ever imagine.
I didn't want to work.
I didn't want to try anything.
Because deep down, I didn't want to fail.
But he's not afraid of that.
No matter what happens, he picks himself
up.
He tries again and again and again and
again.
He would never think of quitting.
He wakes up every morning with purpose and
with hope.
And I think everyone should be inspired by
that.
I know I am.
You don't need signs anymore.
Thank you for coming back.
Mr. Weghorn, thank you for taking the time
from your busy schedule.
Now we've requested that Mr. Avery ask you
a few questions.
I've been studying this guy in interviews.
He's a blowhard.
He's a huge ego.
Here I am, son.
All right.
I can work with that.
Mr. Leghorn, are you aware of the ACME
program known as Project Sisyphus?
I am familiar with the name.
Okay.
And how would you explain the type of
program that it is to this committee?
Well, it's one of research and
development.
Great.
So you're constantly innovating your
cartoon product line to make it better?
Yes, son.
Okay.
That makes sense.
But if you're studying
these products so closely,
why are they malfunctioning so frequently?
That sounds like something you might
tinker with.
Well, son, business is complex.
Okay.
Now, does any of the
information that you get from
Project Sisyphus go into
developing the human line?
Sure.
Sure?
Okay.
So you admit it.
He just admitted it.
Did you hear that?
He admitted it.
You're intentionally giving
dangerous products to cartoons,
willfully causing pain to
millions in this process?
You think progress isn't worth a little
pain?
A little discomfort?
It is, son.
It always has been.
Besides, nothing we've done today or any
other day is illegal.
Isn't that right, Mr. Leghorn?
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
The law is completely
on our side here, and so
is the popular opinion
of the silent majority.
Thank you, Mr. Crane.
Mr. Leghorn.
And another thing.
Take a seat, son.
I'm asking the questions here.
Take a seat, son.
There's nothing cuter than this
prosecutor.
I am reminded of my days as a little
rooster on the porch.
My home sweet home.
I'm on my way to a poultry farm,
where I learned a valuable lesson.
Cartoons are resilient.
Hit us with a mallet, throw us off a
cliff.
We can take it.
Speaking as a cartoon, I think it could
even be a little bit funny.
Am I right?
So what's a little pain for the great
good?
Pain is a part of life.
And if there's is a little pain,
it's a lot.
And it's valuable.
You like that comfortable rubber in those
shoes there, don't you, son?
Well, that's duty-free.
We developed it by bouncing it one million
times off the face of a cartoon.
Those tornado pills became jet propellers.
That high-speed tonic got us to the moon.
So yes, yes, our cartoon products
sometimes do explode.
Sometimes they do backfire.
Sometimes they push the boundaries of
gravity and science.
But do you all want to live in a world
without new?
Without progress?
Now, what is it you always say,
Mr. Crane?
Can't make an omelet without breaking a
few eggs.
Well, that's right!
And in this case, if that egg is
something...
lowlife, cave-dwelling desert dog with no
connections, no family, no friends...
I'm sorry, but so be it.
No harm, no foul.
That is not an accurate depiction of my
client.
Well, I was under the
impression that no one
would speak on his
behalf apart from his lawyer.
Is there anyone in the
whole wide world who
cares what happens to the coyote at all?
Mr. Runner, we will be asking you a series
of yes or no questions.
Two beeps for yes, one beep for no.
Do you understand?
Beep, beep.
Are you a bird?
Beep, beep.
Are you easy to catch?
Beep.
Okay, good.
Are you familiar with a Mr. Wiley coyote?
Beep, beep.
Have you witnessed
Mr. Coyote using any acne
products while in your
presence in the desert?
Beep, beep.
Have those products always failed?
Beep, beep.
Mr. Runner, have you been a witness to Mr.
Coyote's pain and suffering?
Beep, beep.
Yeah, me too.
Would you call him a friend?
Beep, beep.
Well, thank you Mr. Runner.
Thank you for coming here today.
Did you have something additional you'd
like to say?
Beep, beep.
All right, the floor is yours to add to
the record.
Beep, beep.
Beep, beep.
Beep, beep.
Beep, beep.
Bye.
Are you coming back?
Mr. Avery, I must admit, I am very,
very moved.
However, you have offered
no proof of ACME's culpability
other than the pain and suffering
of this one singular coyote.
Therefore, as much as it pains me,
you leave me no other choice.
All in agreement to dismiss this
investigation, say aye.
Aye.
Try... or fail.
Well, no hard feelings, boys.
It's a tough world out there.
Better luck next time.
I think those are the birds you're looking
for.
Go for it.
Don't
you laugh and I don't pay you to laugh!
Well, we tried.
We tried.
And thank you, uh, both, for pushing me.
Wait.
What's going on?
Hey, look!
What is this?
They all want to sue ACME.
Even after how poorly you did,
they trust you.
Avery Jones and Maltese.
Hey!
Can you believe it?
Can't.
Oh, uh, something's in your office
apparently that's very important.
Okay, we got it.
Hey, Counselor.
You put up a good fight
at Congress, but nothing
says guilty better than
some cold, hard evidence.
Here's a gift from yours truly from inside
the doors at ACME.
What's this?
It's about five years' worth of cases.
It's like we got our work cut out for us.
Shocking new developments in the unfolding
ACME case today.
Newly leaked footage from Project Sisyphus
triggered a pre-dawn raid on company
headquarters that quickly led to the
arrest of Buddy Crane, ACME's chief legal
counsel and CEO Foghorn Leghorn, for their
participation in the alleged misconduct.
I'm a cage-free rooster!
Also at the scene, investigators
rescued Dr. Peter Lorre,
an ACME scientist who went
missing over 30 years ago.
His upcoming testimony regarding Project
Sisyphus promises to
bring the truth to light.
Oh, dearie!
Don't be a stranger.
Well,
the sky's the limit.
Sky's the limit.
A little pause.
..
and we are back.
I
need to get a message out.
I know too much.
They're not going to let us leave.
I'm sending for help.
Everything is going to be okay,
my little Tweety.
I promise.
You can jump or we can push you.
Someday the truth will be known.
Everyone,
what's that thing in the sky?
I don't know.
I'll just shoot it down.
Lock on target.
Clear to engage.
Beep, beep, beep.
Beep, beep, beep.
Beep, beep, beep.
Have you gotten into a
catapult hoping to be gently and
sensibly flown to a destination
of your choosing only to be
violently piledrived
face first into the ground?
Have you ever sat a big stack of TNT on
the road hoping to blow up your nemesis?
But when you press the detonator,
the detonator itself explodes?
Have you ever pulled the
ripcord of your parachute
and only a bunch of silverware comes out?
It's not your fault.
There's probably someone to blame.
June.
Maltese.
Justice!
Two for Tuesdays.
Oh!
Oh!
Oh!
Hey, wreck a ball smash!
I could probably get you 250 bucks for
that.
See you next week!
Thank you for calling Avery Jones and
Maltese.
If you've been hit by an anvil,
press 1.
If you've been electrocuted, press 2.
If you've been crushed by a falling piano,
press 3.
Good morning.
It's almost 3.
Huh.
Good morning, Dottie.
Not now.
Do they have the paperwork?
Sal?
Hey, kid.
Did you sleep in that suit again?
Good eye.
I've been waiting for you!
Hi.
I have found some catastrophic fires,
coincidentally all near match factories,
and I really think it's
a great opportunity
to help a lot of people with one case.
How long is this internship again?
Uh, three more months.
Just enough time to really dig in and make
a difference.
You know, you really remind
me of when I was fresh out
of law school, and I mean
that in the worst possible way.
And I will take that as a compliment.
Oh, no, look!
You've got this.
You know, I'm gonna do you a favor,
because you're my niece.
And I want you to have a happy life.
Stop.
At Oxford... I have a feeling I'm
gonna be hearing that phrase a lot.
At Oxford, they really stress the
importance of the law on everyday lives.
And all you're really having me do right
now is brainstorm
ideas for your billboards.
Yeah.
You're new here, so you don't know that
this file goes right over here.
And that, my friend, is freedom.
I really want to pick it up.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
And I really want to file it
alphabetically.
No, you will not.
Please.
You've got a new client in the conference
room.
He seems unhinged.
Good luck.
Mr. Coyote?
Coyote?
Coyote.
All right, well, uh...
How can I help you?
Oh, one of my billboards.
Costs a lot of money to put those up.
So you've been in an accident?
Do you not talk?
Oh, but you have signs.
I don't, uh, understand.
All right.
Is that supposed to be you?
And who's that?
Uh, okay, what are you...
Not entirely necessary to do all that,
but, uh, okay.
Uh, so, seems like we're talking about
some, uh, faulty rocket skates that, uh...
backfired when you were trying to capture
a bird that you have some sort of...
sordid history with?
So, uh, do you have the rocket skates?
Okay, great.
So, we're gonna write in your name as the
plaintiff.
Then we'll say we're asking for,
uh, I don't know, $300.
Three hundred.
And here, we'll write in the name of the
company that, uh, made the skates.
Let me guess.
Acme.
But they're great to deal with for little
stuff like this.
We just drop your skates in a box...
type up a complaint... and boom!
You're the richest coyote in the country.
All I need is a signature.
Or you just want to lick it.
That's probably fine, too.
Here we go.
Oh.
Wait!
Mr. Coyote!
Hey!
Somebody grab that guy!
Mr. Coyote!
Look!
I just need you to sign the...
It's an Acme stapler?
I guess that is how staplers work.
Good God.
Okay.
I get it.
There are problems with Acme's cartoon
products.
I see it all the time.
I mean, I'm surprised.
Acme makes my phone and my car.
Why would they also make this?
No, this is just silly stuff for cartoons,
you know?
What's the worst that could really happen?
They see some birds whipping around their
heads?
Well, it doesn't seem that silly to me.
Paige, this is a run-of-the-mill $300
rocket skate case.
Trust me.
Ben, doesn't that mean that's a pile of
$300 cases?
Oh, come on.
I don't know.
Paige, come on.
Do you know what would
happen if we submitted
all this stuff as evidence together?
We'd have a giant lawsuit on our hands.
That would be amazing.
And if you could prove
a causal connection,
then really the sky's the limit.
The sky is not the limit.
All right?
The limit is, like, right here.
We don't do massive cases.
We do quick and easy.
All right?
Huh.
Where did all this stuff go?
So, Mr. Coyote?
My professional opinion
is that this... What?
This case is worth, you know, a few
hundred dollars.
And I can see if they will replace the
rockets case.
So I'm going to need you to sign this.
Rude.
All right.
Well, it was nice meeting you.
Do you mind putting the evidence box into
the system?
I'm going to lunch.
Here you go.
Into evidence, please.
All right.
What have we got here?
Geez.
Someone's suing for a lot.
Excuse me.
Cartoon products cases go down to the
basement.
Governor, these threats are tantamount to
black men.
The law is completely on our side here.
Because we wrote the law.
Okay.
Great to catch up.
Better be straight away on the Plappinger
case.
Oh, it's done.
Let's just say his next vacation will be
in prison, but I got something else.
Cartoon case?
Basement.
Yeah, I think you need to see this one.
They're suing us for every Acme cartoon
product.
Who?
I wasn't familiar with the name.
Okay.
Look, just pay me the money you owe me,
or I'll sue you for breach of contract.
Okay, I gotta go.
I'll call you later, Mom.
Well, well, well.
It isn't our resident hot shot.
What does that mean?
Serving Acme for every one of their
cartoon products.
Yeah, right.
Do I look like that?
You're looking at the guy who would take
on the biggest corporation in the world.
You're looking at the guy who is taking on
the biggest corporation in the world.
Channel 4 News has
just learned that papers
were filed today against
the Acme Corporation.
Buddy Crane, Acme's chief legal counsel,
declined to comment.
How did this happen?
It's okay.
It's okay.
It's exciting.
All eyes on you, ready to show them what
you got.
Paige, when we sue Acme for some little
thing, nobody even notices.
We're a tiny item on a spreadsheet.
But this?
This went to Buddy Crane.
Who?
Buddy Crane.
He's only, like, the best lawyer in the
country.
Okay.
Went to law school together, and he is a
total machine.
Built like an ox, his
mind is sharp as a tack,
trims his fingernails with a switchblade.
You know, I once saw him eat
a lobster... Well, I ate lobster.
...while it was still alive.
Not even sure that's legal.
What could I have possibly done to deserve
all this?
Did I piss off a witch?
Oh, no.
We could.
How did this happen?
I just typed up everything that was inside
the box.
And I just brought the box inside.
I've just been working on my short game.
I've been on hold for two hours trying to
win tickets to the country jubilee.
You.
Do you have any idea what you've done?
You have put me in such a horrible
position.
Oh.
Hi.
This is my old friend, Kevin.
Yeah, it's been a while.
Look at you, shaking things up.
Well, not intentionally shaking,
really.
I think we should have a face-to-face,
don't you?
Your face and my face?
Be in my office.
Fifteen minutes.
Get things right as rain.
Okay.
Sounds looking forward to it.
From its humble roots
as a cartoon anvil factory,
Acme has become America's
greatest success story.
Acme, I say, Acme is an innovation
factory.
We create the impossible.
With each new product, we revolutionize
industry and the world.
We're a company of family values that
values its family of companies.
Acme.
Hey.
I don't know what your deal is, but I
need you to listen to me very carefully.
Stop.
You are going to follow my lead.
All right.
We're going to tell them this is all just
a big misunderstanding, and we're looking
to get this settled as quickly as
possible.
We will be polite.
We will not detonate explosives.
All right.
If they put something in front of us,
we will sign it.
Got it?
Mr. Avery.
Bill Pelicanos.
And Mr. Coyote.
I'll take you to see Buddy.
So I hear you guys were friends from back
in the day, huh?
Guess you could say that if you were
incorrect.
And look at this guy going clothing
optional.
Hey, Buddy.
Look who's here.
This is Mr. Billboard.
How you been, man?
Good.
Yeah.
Very good.
Those were the days, weren't they?
Yeah.
Harvard Law.
You look... good.
Thank you.
Have a seat.
Okay.
I gotta say, I was a bit surprised to see
your name on a case of this size.
Me too.
I mean, I'm so sorry about all this.
It was just a big misunderstanding.
Well, we got a really busy day around
here.
And I would hate to keep you from getting
back to whatever it is you do.
Yeah.
Law stuff, too.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Sure.
Oh, my God.
And this seems obvious, but I have to say
that ACME denies all charges and accepts
no liability or causal connection between
Mr. Coyote's colorful injuries and our
state-of-the-art and life-enhancing family
products.
Yeah, yeah.
Blah, blah, blah.
And, you know, as much fun
as it would be to get back in a
courtroom with you, I think
it's time to do what you do best.
Settle.
Yeah.
Well, look, thank you so much.
And I'm so sorry for taking up all your
time.
It was unintentional.
I...
Uh...
Uh...
No, no, no.
He didn't mean that.
Do you have another copy?
Is this a joke?
No.
No.
This is not funny.
I thought cartoons were supposed to be
funny.
Gaston, do you want to fight, Avery?
Your tiny firm is unmatched.
We'll tie you in legal loopholes.
We'll bury you in paperwork.
I'll put a dozen of my best lawyers in
this 24 hours a day to make sure your name
is more synonymous with failure than it
already is.
Oh, and I almost forgot.
We don't validate parking!
Do you know what you could do with 50,000
dollars?
Do you have any idea how many birds you
could buy with that?
Flocks!
You know what?
Not that it really matters, but I'm out.
Yeah.
That's right.
I quit, man.
I'm going to find another lawyer.
And this is already my
personal frickin nightmare, and
I'm not sticking around to
see if it can get any worse.
Butterfingers.
No!
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait.
Why didn't you settle?
That's what we do here.
We settle.
Dottie, what do we do here?
We settle.
Okay, I tried to settle, but he wouldn't
let me settle.
He's a coyote.
We're not even trial lawyers.
I have a miniature golf
tournament this weekend, so
I don't even know if I'm
gonna make it in on Monday.
Plus, trial prep adds up.
Photocopies in this economy.
But if we beat Acme, then we can afford a
ton of photocopies.
We won't beat Acme.
I mean, nobody ever has, and nobody ever
will.
The truth is, even if you quit
right now, the firm is already
in the hole for Acme's legal
fees, and that's just from today.
I mean, that could close down our doors.
Look, if we lose, we lose.
If we quit, we really lose.
A lot of money.
One true goal for this trial.
It's this.
We can't look like fools, all right?
Our job is not to win this case.
Our job is to win this case.
Our job is to still be in business when
it's over.
That's the spirit.
We'll talk like lawyers.
What do real lawyers do?
They would find evidence and start making
a list of witnesses.
The bird.
He did witness every time an Acme product
malfunctioned.
He could corroborate Wiley's story.
Sure, whatever.
Add the Roadrunner to our witness list.
One more thing.
Um, where is Mr. Coyote gonna stay?
Fine, boss, be free!
All right, don't give me that look.
Yeah.
I live in a motel.
Look, I got pool access.
Uh... You know, there's no
mortgage... Never have to make my bed.
There's an incredible all-you-can-eat
seafood buffet around the corner.
Uh, tissues come out of a Daarum wall.
Ha.
Hi, Jerry.
Yeah, hi,
I need another room for a few nights.
Not near me, please.
He's not a pet.
He looks like a pet.
Who rents a separate room for their pets?
Cherry, come on.
I've been living here for almost five
years.
You know me.
No pets.
Okay.
You want to do this?
Legally speaking, a pet is a
domesticated or tamed animal
kept as a companion in or
outside an individual's residence.
This is Mr. Coyote.
He is my client.
He's not my pet nor anyone's pet in the
eyes of the law.
And as such, that sign or any rule that
accompanies it does not apply to him.
All right?
It does not say no animals.
And just my unbiased
opinion, he may actually
have a case against
you for discrimination.
Yeah.
He pees on the rug.
It's on you.
All right, deal.
But I would need a full workup of urine
analysis.
I mean, it's a motel.
Plenty of people pee on the rug.
Oh, right next door.
Of course.
Coming
up next, a mouse breaks the sound barrier
in Guadalajara.
One week more to catch Albuquerque's
annual carrot festival.
While it's still in town, are you having
fun?
We are.
You're kind of a psychopath, aren't you?
Watch and learn.
So we take the subpoena like so.
Just cover it with copious amounts of
birdseed.
Roadrunner eats the birdseed, grabs a
subpoena, and boom.
He's legally obligated to show up to
court.
Instant Roadrunner trap.
He's got a gun.
Beep, beep.
Is this some kind of inside thing with you
guys?
Is everyone clear on our plan?
No.
Nah.
Yes.
Paige, what's our plan?
So we have to prove to a jury that acne
cartoon products are at fault for every
accident that Wiley's had going back
years.
So we are going to take pictures and we're
going to gather evidence.
And we're going to put the evidence in
little bags.
And we're going to interview experts and
witnesses.
And we're going to highlight big books of
photocopied documents.
And we're going to pound the pavement and
we're going to study up.
And we're going to try and catch our big
eyewitness by leaving
a nice note in the desert.
And if we follow my
plan by the end of this,
we'll have enough
evidence to take acne down.
We really have nothing.
I mean, I kind of assumed that we'd have
nothing, but this is nothing.
All rise.
The Court of the Second Judicial Circuit
of Albuquerque is now in session.
The Honorable Judge Trapa Grosso presided.
You may be seated.
Human.
Human.
Quiet!
My name is Judge Trapa Grosso.
The name of the case is Coyote versus
Acme.
I am not a loosey-goosey judge.
I am a no-nonsense, no-silly-stuff judge.
Is that understood?
Yes.
Mr. Crane.
We live in a great country, don't we?
Because it's one that values freedom above
all else.
You're free to live your life any way you
see fit.
Could mean living in the desert.
Out in a cave.
Spending your days chasing after a bird.
Who is much, much faster than you.
But that, that is your right.
As an American.
But that freedom, it comes with great
responsibility.
If you were to take a
missile, for instance,
and you were to glue handlebars to it.
Well, that's, that's your choice.
But we expect you to
understand that that missile and
those handlebars, they
aren't designed to catch birds.
What I will prove to this jury is that
man, Wile E.
Coyote, he is reckless.
And all of his injuries are
self-inflicted.
I mean, we won't condemn him, you or I.
We all know who's responsible.
As clear as the desert sky.
I think I just laid an egg.
God bless America.
God bless the troops.
Damn, that was really good.
Oh, uh, please don't write that down.
And, and, please don't write that down.
Or, or, that down.
Mr. Avery.
Um, now, uh, now what, what did the,
uh, defense say we're gonna argue?
Huh?
I mean, I know the answer to it.
I know the answer.
I'm not asking you a question.
I mean, it is, it is a question.
But it's a question that I'm asking to me.
Let me start over.
Let me start over.
Objection.
To my start.
So the defense said that we were gonna
argue that, uh, the
products are dangerous.
And that acne is negligent in,
uh, selling them.
I, I do really agree with all that.
I mean, it's not fancy, but it's true.
Um, if, uh, sorry.
One second, please.
One sec...
Wiley, we don't need evidence right now.
Mr. Avery.
Okay, okay.
Excuse me, Your Honor.
My client would like me to show you this
defective acne rocket skate.
And as you can see, there's a faulty on
switch.
Nothing.
God bless America.
God, uh, bless the troops.
Opening arguments today in Coyote v.
Acme.
Sources close to the case report that Acme
is doing a fantastic job protecting their
brand and dignity, while the plaintiff
appears hungry and afraid.
More after this.
One week more to catch
Albuquerque's annual
carrot festival while it's still in town.
Yeah?
241, we've been getting noise complaints
about a loud TV.
Seriously?
It's the TV you're having a problem with.
Okay, I'll turn it...
Are you having fun?
We, uh...
Cherry, I turned it off.
Meem.
What's up, Doc?
Who's this?
I, uh, can't tell you.
I want to, but I can't.
A pickle, ain't it?
You sure you have the right number?
Your trial.
I think I may be able to help you with
Acme.
What?
I have information that could stop Acme.
For good.
Oh my God, you could stop this case?
If this gets out, it'll all be over.
I have an associate with information.
If they figure out what he knows,
he's a sitting duck.
Well, who?
Where do I find him?
Write this down.
I'm only gonna say it once.
Okay, okay.
Grabbing a pen.
Hang on, hang on.
666 Gary Road Drive.
That doesn't sound like a place I want to
go.
Look for a check.
Acme has ears and eyes and ears
everywhere.
And they've made people disappear.
Don't forget that.
I won't.
Will I be able to contact you again?
Mr. Leghorn.
Buddy, I say buddy, you little rascal,
you.
That was Bora Bora.
The tax haven's so nice, they named it
twice.
So I say I heard we have ourselves a
lawsuit in the animated sector.
Talk to PR about this.
You know, it's a local paper.
And pretty flattering.
You know, I'm gonna win this case as fast
as I can.
But in the meantime,
I think things like this
make us look pretty
good in the public eye.
Not ideal, but you know, it's like killing
two birds with one stone.
Uh, one stone.
Two birds, one stone.
What a vile expression.
I only... Rotten.
We both know it would be very,
I say very unpleasant for everyone
involved if anything bigger, I say bigger,
were to become public.
Oh, mysterious collar.
It's so cool.
So what do you sound like?
I don't know.
He's kind of like, eh, what's up,
doc?
I have information.
Chomp, chomp, chomp.
He's like chewing on a cracker or
something.
Okay.
Well, math is saying it should be right
here.
It's just a wall.
Jack!
God.
Is there a Jack anywhere?
Wait.
What's that?
Oh, that kind of Jack.
Somebody's got a sense of humor.
There's a duck, and he is sitting.
Feels a bit easy.
Well, good thing I like easy.
Excuse me.
Hi, uh, my name is Kevin Avery.
This is Paige.
I'm a personal injury attorney.
Well, look who decided to show up.
Oh, great.
Thank you.
I wasn't sure if you knew we were coming.
You're a little late, and you're still
wearing that hideous suit.
Take your pants off right over there,
please, and, um, strike a pose.
Uh, no.
It's so difficult to find nude models
these days.
Sit down.
Uh... Lasperella?
Eh, we're all right.
Thank you.
Disrobe and pretend you're thinking.
I expect this is going to take a few
hours.
Yeah, um, we had an
anonymous caller say that
you might have some important information.
Yeah, information that can help us end our
case quickly.
Information?
Yes.
About acne?
Acne?
Uh, yes.
Acne.
Acme?
Acme?
After all this, they call me Staffy?
The world is Staffy!
Acme?
Ac-you!
You'll never get it out of me!
I'll tell you everything.
Your face is covered in acne!
He really shouldn't be here.
I agree, Doctor.
Not staring at Sophia
for any, uh, pantsless modeling gig.
Look, I'm a horse!
I'm a horse!
Well, we drove him crazy and we got... a
canipate.
Well, it could be important.
Clearly, he's been holding
onto this for a while, so... Wait.
That's all, folks.
Are we the folks?
Do you think we're gonna get kidnapped?
Held to ransom?
I feel so alive!
So, what do you think it is?
Thanks.
That looks unspeakably dangerous.
And yet he walked in anyway.
Wait, what are you doing?
I'm following Wily.
Now I just look like a loser if I stay out
here.
Coming into the tunnel.
Hello?
I bet they don't tell you
to walk down mysterious
tunnels in your fancy classes at Oxford.
I bet they discourage you, actually.
Actually, I thought about majoring in
mysterious tunnels.
No, you didn't.
Yeah, I did.
What have we got here?
I found a message!
What does it say?
It says, Daffy, I'm not sure how long I
have.
I hope this message gets to you.
Things have gone awry with Project
Sisyphus.
Sisyphus?
What is Project Sisyphus?
Acme is watching my every move,
and I have a feeling I'm in grave danger.
If
you see this message, please send help.
Dr. Laurie.
Captain!
Crane!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Go!
Did I not say unspeakably dangerous?
Didn't I say those exact words?
No.
I did.
Okay.
What could this mean?
Project Sisyphus?
I don't know.
I don't know.
All right.
What?
What just happened?
What?
Boss, I think they're on to us.
Okay.
So Sisyphus is from Greek mythology.
And he was punished by the gods and made
to roll a boulder up a hill every day.
But it would just roll right back down for
eternity.
Huh.
And it was also what Daffy was painting.
So what?
That's not evidence.
None of this is going to help us win a
trial.
All right.
This is... It's all just a waste of our
time.
We have a client who, no offense,
can't read a warning label.
We have piles and piles of stuff that he
himself broke.
We have nothing, Paige.
Well, you've been settling Acme cases for
years.
And you have never stopped to think and
see a pattern.
A pattern?
Yes.
My clients go boom, and two seconds later,
they're fine.
Nobody cares.
So that makes it okay?
Boom, $100, that's fair?
This case can make it right.
This is your opportunity to really show
people what you're capable of.
Yeah, but that only works if I don't lose.
And why do you assume you're going to
lose?
Are you kidding?
It is really super easy to lose.
And it's better you learn that now.
You know, everyone thought I was crazy for
coming here.
But I didn't want to just go to some big
law firm and help the
rich guys get richer.
I thought...
I thought you were actually still a real
lawyer.
Yeah, me too.
So, uh, what is it about the Roadrunner?
There are no words.
You know, I envy you, really.
You know, it must be nice to have such a
clear goal.
I mean, I used to have that, I think.
You know, I was hungry, and I was chasing.
But I didn't like the pressure of having
to always win.
And I got burnt out on trying.
Anyway, you're a really good listener.
Hey!
What are you doing?
Stop!
Wiley!
Stop!
Stop!
Ah!
There's a trap!
Stop!
Stop!
Stop!
Stop!
Stop!
We were having a heart-to-heart!
Wait!
Wiley!
You can't make that jump!
Wiley!
You made it.
Well, you go a long way to make a point.
Hey, Wiley.
Thanks.
I'll see you tomorrow.
Are you sitting down?
Uh, yes.
Well, Sal's not.
Is that gonna be a problem?
Wiley is conning us.
The only reason he's doing this case is to
catch and kill the
Roadrunner during the trial.
That's not good.
It's all just part of a plot.
He's just using us so he'll put the bird
on the witness stand.
If the Roadrunner shows up to court,
it'll be chaos.
I'll look like a fool.
If the firm will fold, we'll be mattress
salesmen.
That's kind of demeaning to mattress
salesmen.
Fine.
We'll be, uh, garbage men.
Come in.
Okay.
Garbage people.
My dad's garbage people.
Okay.
I'm just really nervous about letting
Wiley back into this courtroom.
Without Wiley, there's no trial.
With no trial, there's no firm.
And without the firm, we
are... We gonna be broke.
I hate to suggest lying
to a dog, but you're gonna
have to convince him that
the Roadrunner will be there.
Paige, I was wrong.
See what you can find out about Project
Sisyphus and how it's connected to ACME.
Great.
I'm already on it.
Okay.
Hi.
I was just wondering if a Dr. Laurie still
lives here?
They listen, you know.
Would you like some tea, dearie?
It was a very happy marriage.
He used to work long days,
but would still come home and
play the piano for me for
hours, because he loved me.
He knew how much I loved it.
We had 87 years together.
I am grateful.
Um, when did Dr. Laurie pass away,
if you don't mind me asking?
Oh, he's not dead.
He's missing.
He went to work one day with our little
bird, and I never saw
either of them again.
They told me he ran off with his
secretary, but I don't think so.
His secretary was a penguin.
What can you tell me about Project
Sisyphus?
What?
Which day what?
Oh, which day is the Roadrunner
testifying?
Any day now.
Why, do you have any particular reason for
wanting to catch up with him?
Okay, well, I'll keep you posted.
I need this Roadrunner.
Absolutely.
Why exactly?
He's the only one that's seen every time
this moron's used our
products incorrectly.
I had to bet.
He's holding a grudge.
Go out there and you burn with me.
How hard could it be to catch a bird?
Heh, heh, heh.
I am sick.
I will punch a baby
bear in his... Give me lip.
I'm gonna send you to the yard.
Get a stick.
Make a switch.
I can end the conversation real quick.
I've been a liar.
I can kick a lion in his crack.
I'm the... I will fall off in your crib.
Take a deep.
Hit your... On the... Get your... My
husband was the head inventor of animated
products at Acme.
He was so excited when he got the job.
He wanted to make things that really
helped cartoons.
Like the anti-lump pump.
An eraser of stinky lines.
Oh, and this anti-predator spray.
Hello?
After a while, things changed.
He didn't like what was going on.
And then he disappeared.
Recently, I've been getting phone calls.
Sometimes they hang
up, but sometimes... Me?
What's up, doc?
I don't know the man on the telephone.
I don't know where my dear husband is.
But I know Project Sisyphus is the reason
he's gone.
Project Roadkill in T-3...
2... 1... Sir, this is the
target looking at us.
Meep, meep.
Did we catch him?
So...
Obviously...
We hit a speed bump.
Does it itch?
Yes.
But I'm afraid to touch it.
You eyes and ears out there.
What happened?
What did you see?
Well, I taught Utah.
You taught Utah?
I don't pay you to tink Utah.
I pay you to talk.
Utah!
Utah?
Or you taught Utah?
Because you just said you taught Utah.
I did.
I did talk.
What did you teach?
What did you talk?
A breakdown on the eastern perimeter.
Ultimately, that's where he ran off.
That roadrunner is very, very fast,
sir.
No!
Step your game up, Bird.
They're getting too close.
I don't just want him scared.
I want him ruined.
I want him to stop digging around.
You know what happened to Dr. Lorry.
You want the same thing to happen to your
granny.
No!
Please!
I'll get him tonight!
I... I...
Hey, great job, big dog.
Shut up, Patches!
Absolutely, sir.
Want to say another word?
No!
No!
Doctor Lorry, will you listen to me?
I really need you tonight.
Uh, uh, uh... An detective will
help me with today's search!
Uh, uh... I wish I could say more, but
Acme has ears and
eyes and ears everywhere.
That's evidence.
Okay, that's enough.
Wiley, Wiley, Wiley.
Stop that.
Is there some kind of plan to this?
There it is.
Wait.
I know this song.
From where?
I don't know.
It's like a TV show or an ad or...
Wait.
Albuquerque's annual Carrot Festival.
Okay.
What is that?
A festival of carrots in Albuquerque.
It happens every year, annually.
Hello?
Mystery caller?
Mystery caller, who called me?
Tell him we're from Avery Jones and
Maltese.
We're from Avery Jones and Maltese.
You can show yourself at any time.
So, uh, what is up, Doc?
Who's there?
I'll never tell you, Mac.
I'm a creature of the night, a shadow that
moves.
You'll never figure out who I am.
Oh, my.
Oh, heavens.
You've seen my face.
Don't look at me.
I'm too... beautiful.
Mystery caller?
I tell you, the budget
has been bumbling and
stumbling your way
through this case for weeks.
You're lucky you have me on your side.
Hey, you been followed?
Got eyes on you?
Caught by a red light camera?
Spotted by a drone?
Have you been... bugged?
This is just getting embarrassing now.
Look, I got, like, a million questions for
you.
Why didn't you call again?
What happened to Dr. Laurie?
And what can you tell us about Project
Sisyphus?
Enough with the questions, Counselor.
This calls for a flashback.
Dr. Laurie was the head inventor of acne
cartoon products, you see.
He built some amazing things.
Essentials, like the quick change machine.
One day, they sent an executive from
corporate to oversee things.
The guy was a real toy.
Suddenly, there was a lot of secrets.
They called it Project Sisyphus.
Under the new management, the test became
increasingly reckless.
I'm not sure I understand.
What was it all for?
They weren't inventing products for
cartoons.
They were using cartoons to invent
products.
Dr. Laurie told them this was wrong, and
that their tests were harmful to cartoons.
He pleaded with them to put an end to it.
But instead, they put an end to him.
Everyone who worked on
Project Sisyphus is either
missing, were forced to
work for acne, or quacked.
And when did the program end?
Don't you see?
It never ended.
It evolved.
Instead of testing
dangerous products in the
lab, they let them
out into the real world.
Yes.
Wiley's rocket skates, they were designed
to backfire.
Now you're getting it.
The more something breaks,
the more a cartoon gets hurt,
the more data to make better
acne products for humans.
Exactly, exactly.
Wiley, you're what they call a high usage
user.
They let you boom and splat and bang for
years and years.
Knowing full well the toll.
Would you testify to this in court?
The world needs to hear this.
No, no, no.
You need someone on the inside to spill
the beans.
Get the head of PR at Acme to testify.
He's a master of spin.
His name is... Uh-oh.
That's my cue.
They didn't.
Hey, if anyone asks,
tell them your informant
was a little hunter with a funny hat.
We're all counting on you.
Bye.
Yeah, that's great.
No one's going to get through that door.
Any added security is great.
Will you tell us your role at Acme for the
record?
Okay, great.
If he says anything wrong, we'll get him
out of here.
Done.
And what does your role as PR
representative entail?
Well, Acme.
So you have authority to speak for Acme.
What can you tell us about Project
Sisyphus?
Mr. Devil, what is Project Sisyphus?
Project Sisyphus, may I remind you,
you are under oath.
Puddin'!
Objection?
Counselors, approach the bench.
This case is turning my courtroom into a
circus.
They just ejected my witness!
We don't know that.
Uh... The devil!
I couldn't agree more.
I'd like to file a motion to exclude all
evidence submitted by the prosecution.
Save the original pair of rocket skates.
All else is overreaching.
Motion granted.
Are you kidding?
Thank you, your honor.
Now in response, I'd like to file a motion
for dismissal due to lack of evidence.
Motion granted.
I'm tired of all this bunk.
You're not allowed to say that.
That's the beauty of being a judge.
I can say whatever I want.
Mis-trial?
There, I said it.
Case dismissed.
Case dismissed.
It
was a miscarriage of justice, but it was
not a surprise.
The Acme Corporation has
knowingly been putting dangerous
products into the hands
of cartoons for decades.
Acme has gone to great
lengths to cover up an
insidious plot that they
call Project Sisyphus.
They have threatened the safety of myself
and my client.
Look.
Bombs, boulders, pianos.
They will stop at nothing.
But myself and my associates, we will keep
fighting.
I mean, these companies think they can do
whatever they want
and get away with all of it.
Because they do.
We're sick of it.
And it stops now.
So we're getting ready to launch a...
Excuse me a moment.
Excuse me.
Excuse me.
Wiley!
More chaos in court today after the Acme
trial was dismissed.
By the very fair and honorable Judge Tropo
Grosso.
The plaintiffs made their objections known
by wrestling a six-foot cartoon rocket.
It's all good.
Nothing to see here.
Is that your car?
Hey, Paige.
Have you seen?
What?
Your speech.
It's the number one trending news item in
the country right now.
It's everywhere.
What?
Do you like my speech?
Well, and the car exploding, I think is a
part of it.
What?
Well...
I I I get it.
I I I I I
Wait, where are you going?
What?
Wiley, no, you can't go.
I need you in DC.
I mean, this is the big showdown.
If you don't show up, there's no hearing.
This whole thing will have been for
nothing.
The Roadrunner will be there.
Yeah, of course, he'll be there.
Yeah, he's coming.
I promise.
I promise.
It's over.
Come on.
What do you say?
The whole world will be watching.
And he'll be there.
All right.
Good.
Come on.
Let's go.
What initially seemed
to be a case of routine
product malfunction has
turned into a David vs.
Goliath tale as old as time.
We'd like to wish our furry little friend
good luck in DC.
We're rooting for you, Wiley.
And we always were.
Next time on Day One...
When a company is this successful, there's
always someone looking to tear it down.
But our hands are clean.
Flight attendants prepare for landing.
Sorry about that initial wrong turn out of
Albuquerque, folks.
No more warrants.
I don't care if you kidnap him, run him
out of town, or throw him down a hole, No.
Wiley Coyote will not be at the hearing
tomorrow.
Are we clear?
Yes, boss.
We'll clear.
Please be quiet.
Wiley, please be quiet.
Look, I promise you what I have to do is
more important than what you have to do.
There's been a change of plans.
He... he couldn't make it, right?
Fine.
You think I would drag
the Roadrunner out here so
you could destroy me in
front of the entire world?
Yeah, I know you just wanted him in that
courtroom so you could
catch him and eat him.
Why would I help you do that?
Okay, yeah, I lied.
I lied.
I needed you to stay with this case.
But you know what?
You lied to me.
Huh?
You misled me.
You made me think that this case was about
something.
And it is.
You know, this is way bigger than the
Roadrunner.
Did you not even process what the rabbit
said?
You're a high-usage user.
I mean, look at all this stuff.
You're addicted.
Every explosion, every time you fell to
the bottom of a canyon, Acme wanted that.
You know, I changed around my whole life
for you.
My entire routine.
You're probably all gonna blow up in my
face because you wanted a drumstick.
Oh, myself?
You have only cared about your plan this
entire time.
Oh, the Roadrunner.
The Roadrunner.
I'm so sick of this Roadrunner.
You're never gonna catch him!
Okay?
You just... you really aren't.
Just stop trying.
Yeah?
Hey, Kev.
Look, I didn't want to have to tell you
this right before the hearing, but, uh.
..
We've spent every last cent on this trial.
We're out of money.
So, what does that mean?
It means, unless there's
some kind of miracle,
there's not gonna be
a firm to come back to.
I made you guys appointments to donate
plasma next week.
I can't go.
I don't want to put this kind of pressure
on you.
We just thought you should know.
Okay.
Uh,
what is the holdup?
He's in the bathroom.
Looks like you had a rough night,
huh?
Oh, thanks for your believable concern.
Come on.
Do you really want to go out there?
I mean...
All those cameras?
Pressure?
What is this?
It's everything you ever wanted.
Freedom from responsibility.
That's no strings attached.
That is under the table.
That's for you.
All I gotta do is walk out this door right
now.
I mean, come on.
I really want to just keep doing the same
thing over and over again.
Try, fail, try, fail.
Expecting a different result.
I just realized that, uh...
Yeah.
I do.
You get the gist.
Oh my god, you look like a stuntman.
Is Wiley here?
He's not with you?
I haven't seen him since
we were going 80 miles
an hour on the highway
strapped to a refrigerator.
What the hell?
I thought you guys were in the hotel room
next to me.
I feel so left out.
I really screwed up.
He knows the roadrunner's not coming.
He knows I lied.
Ugh.
I'm a jerk.
I should have been honest with him.
It just seemed easier.
Mr. Aveway.
Uh, thank you.
Thank you for joining us today.
We are here to determine whether or not
Acme products are a danger to society.
Uh, where was your client?
I'm, uh, not entirely sure, to be honest.
Senator Fudd, the fact that Mr. Coyote
hasn't deemed it necessary to grace us
with his presence at the
scheduled time should
tell you all you need to
know about his character.
Hmm.
I think this does tell us a lot.
Look.
My client has a long history with Acme.
He's been using their products for
decades.
Why is that, if they're so... dangerous?
Well, he doesn't have a choice,
really.
Acme has a monopoly over all the tools
required for Mr. Coyote's work.
His work?
I have here that he's unemployed and
living in a cave.
It's true.
It's true.
It's a fact.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
Pursuant to Sylvester V.
Gonzales, chase by predator is a legal
occupation under the law.
He may not get a salary, but he works.
In fact, he's one of the most hardworking
people I've ever met.
And he's brave.
He will walk out onto the tiniest rope
over the largest canyon.
He'll straddle a rocket that he's glued
handlebars to without batting an eye.
I mean...
Uh...
Sorry.
Look.
When Mr. Coyote first
walked into my office, I
was the laziest person
you could ever imagine.
I didn't want to work.
I didn't want to try anything.
Because deep down, I didn't want to fail.
But he's not afraid of that.
No matter what happens, he picks himself
up.
He tries again and again and again and
again.
He would never think of quitting.
He wakes up every morning with purpose and
with hope.
And I think everyone should be inspired by
that.
I know I am.
You don't need signs anymore.
Thank you for coming back.
Mr. Weghorn, thank you for taking the time
from your busy schedule.
Now we've requested that Mr. Avery ask you
a few questions.
I've been studying this guy in interviews.
He's a blowhard.
He's a huge ego.
Here I am, son.
All right.
I can work with that.
Mr. Leghorn, are you aware of the ACME
program known as Project Sisyphus?
I am familiar with the name.
Okay.
And how would you explain the type of
program that it is to this committee?
Well, it's one of research and
development.
Great.
So you're constantly innovating your
cartoon product line to make it better?
Yes, son.
Okay.
That makes sense.
But if you're studying
these products so closely,
why are they malfunctioning so frequently?
That sounds like something you might
tinker with.
Well, son, business is complex.
Okay.
Now, does any of the
information that you get from
Project Sisyphus go into
developing the human line?
Sure.
Sure?
Okay.
So you admit it.
He just admitted it.
Did you hear that?
He admitted it.
You're intentionally giving
dangerous products to cartoons,
willfully causing pain to
millions in this process?
You think progress isn't worth a little
pain?
A little discomfort?
It is, son.
It always has been.
Besides, nothing we've done today or any
other day is illegal.
Isn't that right, Mr. Leghorn?
Absolutely.
Absolutely.
The law is completely
on our side here, and so
is the popular opinion
of the silent majority.
Thank you, Mr. Crane.
Mr. Leghorn.
And another thing.
Take a seat, son.
I'm asking the questions here.
Take a seat, son.
There's nothing cuter than this
prosecutor.
I am reminded of my days as a little
rooster on the porch.
My home sweet home.
I'm on my way to a poultry farm,
where I learned a valuable lesson.
Cartoons are resilient.
Hit us with a mallet, throw us off a
cliff.
We can take it.
Speaking as a cartoon, I think it could
even be a little bit funny.
Am I right?
So what's a little pain for the great
good?
Pain is a part of life.
And if there's is a little pain,
it's a lot.
And it's valuable.
You like that comfortable rubber in those
shoes there, don't you, son?
Well, that's duty-free.
We developed it by bouncing it one million
times off the face of a cartoon.
Those tornado pills became jet propellers.
That high-speed tonic got us to the moon.
So yes, yes, our cartoon products
sometimes do explode.
Sometimes they do backfire.
Sometimes they push the boundaries of
gravity and science.
But do you all want to live in a world
without new?
Without progress?
Now, what is it you always say,
Mr. Crane?
Can't make an omelet without breaking a
few eggs.
Well, that's right!
And in this case, if that egg is
something...
lowlife, cave-dwelling desert dog with no
connections, no family, no friends...
I'm sorry, but so be it.
No harm, no foul.
That is not an accurate depiction of my
client.
Well, I was under the
impression that no one
would speak on his
behalf apart from his lawyer.
Is there anyone in the
whole wide world who
cares what happens to the coyote at all?
Mr. Runner, we will be asking you a series
of yes or no questions.
Two beeps for yes, one beep for no.
Do you understand?
Beep, beep.
Are you a bird?
Beep, beep.
Are you easy to catch?
Beep.
Okay, good.
Are you familiar with a Mr. Wiley coyote?
Beep, beep.
Have you witnessed
Mr. Coyote using any acne
products while in your
presence in the desert?
Beep, beep.
Have those products always failed?
Beep, beep.
Mr. Runner, have you been a witness to Mr.
Coyote's pain and suffering?
Beep, beep.
Yeah, me too.
Would you call him a friend?
Beep, beep.
Well, thank you Mr. Runner.
Thank you for coming here today.
Did you have something additional you'd
like to say?
Beep, beep.
All right, the floor is yours to add to
the record.
Beep, beep.
Beep, beep.
Beep, beep.
Beep, beep.
Bye.
Are you coming back?
Mr. Avery, I must admit, I am very,
very moved.
However, you have offered
no proof of ACME's culpability
other than the pain and suffering
of this one singular coyote.
Therefore, as much as it pains me,
you leave me no other choice.
All in agreement to dismiss this
investigation, say aye.
Aye.
Try... or fail.
Well, no hard feelings, boys.
It's a tough world out there.
Better luck next time.
I think those are the birds you're looking
for.
Go for it.
Don't
you laugh and I don't pay you to laugh!
Well, we tried.
We tried.
And thank you, uh, both, for pushing me.
Wait.
What's going on?
Hey, look!
What is this?
They all want to sue ACME.
Even after how poorly you did,
they trust you.
Avery Jones and Maltese.
Hey!
Can you believe it?
Can't.
Oh, uh, something's in your office
apparently that's very important.
Okay, we got it.
Hey, Counselor.
You put up a good fight
at Congress, but nothing
says guilty better than
some cold, hard evidence.
Here's a gift from yours truly from inside
the doors at ACME.
What's this?
It's about five years' worth of cases.
It's like we got our work cut out for us.
Shocking new developments in the unfolding
ACME case today.
Newly leaked footage from Project Sisyphus
triggered a pre-dawn raid on company
headquarters that quickly led to the
arrest of Buddy Crane, ACME's chief legal
counsel and CEO Foghorn Leghorn, for their
participation in the alleged misconduct.
I'm a cage-free rooster!
Also at the scene, investigators
rescued Dr. Peter Lorre,
an ACME scientist who went
missing over 30 years ago.
His upcoming testimony regarding Project
Sisyphus promises to
bring the truth to light.
Oh, dearie!
Don't be a stranger.
Well,
the sky's the limit.
Sky's the limit.
A little pause.
..
and we are back.