Dean (2016) Movie Script
Next saved message.
Hey, Dean, it's mom.
I just wanted to tell you
your dad and I had
the best time with you
and Michelle last night.
It was so fun visiting
you guys in Brooklyn.
Anyway, I'll talk to you soon
and love you, bye.
Message saved.
Hi, it's your dad.
I'm, uh, hoping you're alive.
If so, call me because
I have some important news.
Message erased.
My father's always been
full of important news.
This week's important news?
He got a new pair of jeans.
Dad's an engineer, so, to him,
life is basically a series
of problems to be solved,
and his approach to grieving
has been no exception.
Thanks to his therapist, Tim,
dad is taking walks,
reading books, watching DVDs.
Everything is about taking
productive steps forward
even if he isn't totally ready.
And this dinosaur
no longer roams the earth.
- Really? Since when?
- About eight years ago.
I can set you up with basically
an updated version of that
which is this one right here.
- Do you watch TV?
- Yeah, I watch TV.
You can watch TV on the phone.
I'll just watch it on my TV.
I, on the other hand,
have been focusing less
on moving forward and more on
just sitting around,
thinking.
Work hasn't been going
too well, either.
I just missed the third official
final deadline for my book.
My first book
did pretty well, actually.
One critic said it was,
quote, "full of whimsy."
I'll take it.
I'm excited about the new book,
but, I don't know,
I guess I've just hit a wall.
It's not that I can't come up
with new drawings,
it's more that they all seem
to be about one subject.
On top of that,
an uninvited guest
has started to show up
in my work.
And he won't seem to leave.
Meanwhile, dad has now
entered what seems to be
some sort of cross-training
phase of grief.
I can't say I understand
what he's doing,
but we've never really
understood each other,
so why start now?
When are you gonna get
a haircut?
I have not seen
your forehead in 15 years.
- With the hair again?
- You're living in the '60s.
What is that?
Are those the '60s?
- Yeah.
- Oh.
- It's done.
- I'm in a conga line,
and I'm playing a slide whistle.
That wasn't a conga line.
I was doing
the hare Krishna thing.
- Looks like a conga line.
- I see.
Look, I'm...
I'm going to talk to you
about, uh, some news.
Mm-hmm?
I'm gonna sell the house.
- What are you talking about?
- I'm selling the house.
You're just out of the blue
gonna sell our house?
It's not out of the blue.
I've given it
some thought, okay?
I can't live there.
It's ridiculous.
It makes no sense for me
to stay there.
- It's too big.
- It's too big?
- Yeah.
- Could you just, like,
not use all the rooms
or something?
Maybe you could, like,
I don't know,
cover up the furniture in some
of the rooms with sheets.
- Just don't go in there.
- Wha... like I'm a countess?
I don't know.
I just think this is hasty.
You know,
we need to talk about this.
I grew up there.
I don't wanna just
sell our house.
- Dean, it...
Oh, my god, that's my phone.
That's my new phone.
Sorry.
Here we go.
Um, I can't talk now.
I'm with my son.
You see, I'm busy?
It can't see you.
It's more of a voice thing.
Oh, you think it can't see me?
Yeah, dream on.
They know what's going on
at the other end of this thing.
- There.
Oh! I just took a picture
of my sandwich.
Okay, hang on.
Hang on.
Come on.
Oh, good.
- Smooth.
- You know, speaking of Tim,
I really think you should
give him another chance.
- He's really helped me a lot.
- I appreciate it, dad,
but I'm more of, like,
a self-help kind of guy
- than the guidance and the exercises and...
- Yeah.
The books and all that stuff,
it's just...
That doesn't help me.
- Mm-hmm.
- You know...
And Michelle,
that's got nothing to do with
losing your mom?
It's more complicated than that.
I always liked Michelle.
You guys were good together.
Yeah, I know.
You should see us apart, though.
We're really great.
- I don't need it back.
I don't want it back.
It's yours.
- Tell me, what am I supposed to do with it?
- Do what you want with it.
You can put it on a bracelet
maybe like as a charm?
Oh, wow.
Why don't we think of it
as a keepsake?
Oh, yeah, that's a great idea.
"Oh, this?
This is just my former
engagement ring.
Oh, well, see,
when I got un-proposed to,
I decided to turn it
into a charm."
- Okay. - "So I could always remember
that time I didn't get married."
That's a really great idea.
I did not unpropose to you.
Our relationship...
Kind of eroded over time.
Like...
Like a coastline.
Or, like, some rocks.
So... I'm sand?
We both are,
if you think about it.
Never speak of a woman
in geological terms.
That was Brett's takeaway
from the whole relationship.
This was the kind of advice
that comes from a man
who had recently
walked into scaffolding
because he was Googling himself
on his new face gear.
Can you take those things off,
by the way?
- I just... I can't.
- These?
- Yeah.
- Why?
They're so comfortable.
It's the...
I feel like
you're flying something.
Just take them off.
Miraculously,
Brett is getting married,
and I'm gonna be his best man.
Well, one of them.
The other one is Kevin,
his new business partner
who I guess needs
a best friend or something
'cause he's moving in on mine.
Anyway, I'm really happy
for Brett.
His fiance's great.
They're getting a new place
on the upper West Side,
and, you know, his life
is really coming together.
And me?
Well, yesterday I drew this.
Truth is, I don't know if I've ever met
anyone else who's quite like Michelle.
Maybe I made a mistake,
you know?
Maybe we should give it
another shot.
- I don't know.
- What are you talking about?
- We had a lot of good memories.
- Whoa, whoa, stop.
Look at me.
Focus.
You need to take some time alone
to deal with some things.
- I am alone.
- Well, all the stuff that you
and your dad are going
through right now,
the answer's not a woman, Dean.
It's you.
Yeah.
You just read that
off the Internet?
Yeah, just now.
You like that?
- Yeah, very wise.
- Thank you very much, yeah.
Wise guy.
- Ah, uh, Patrick?
- Yes.
- Robert? Yes, yes, hi.
- Yes? Yeah, good.
- Nice to meet you.
- Good to meet you in person.
- Hey, uh, this is Carol.
- Oh.
Sorry, I was just
checking out your veranda.
Oh, fantastic.
Good. Hi.
- Hi.
- Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.
- Carol, it is?
- Carol, yes.
- Carol, okay.
Well, this is it.
This is the whole.
This is the, uh...
- This is the family room.
- Oh, uh...
- Carol.
- No, I...
Sometimes I react without...
But...
- No, no.
- No, this is a great house.
I've kind of let it
get away from me a bit.
Perhaps for the open house
we could do
- with a little bit of staging.
- Yeah, maybe a new sofa?
- Oh.
- Definitely a new sofa.
- Okay.
- Cat?
Oh, no, that's...
That's my son.
My son, yeah.
He's, uh,
he's an adult now,
at least numerically,
and completely house trained.
- Oh.
- That's great.
It's like my nephew.
My sister's got him
on one of those leashes,
which I'm sure
is not gonna add
to any weird issues later on.
Oh, yeah.
But he's really good
at chasing balls.
- Does he live nearby?
- Uh...
- Your son?
- No, uh, yeah, he's in Brooklyn now.
No, but I work in the city, so I see
him whenever he needs something.
- So you live here alone?
- Yes, uh, since my wife died.
It's just me.
- Oh, I'm sorry, Robert.
- No, no, it's okay.
I've got a terrific therapist.
I'm reading all the books
you're supposed to read, so...
- Yeah, there you go.
- Let me just, uh, show you the kitchen.
Uh, hold my calls.
This way.
Man, I haven't seen you
in a long time.
Yeah, I got to fly all the way to
Brett's wedding to see my friend?
- What the hell is that?
- I know.
You have got to be the oldest ring
bearer I've ever seen in my life.
Yeah, I'm not the ring bearer.
I'm the best man, but...
Sorry you didn't make
the cut, buddy.
I'm pretty sure Kevin
was the best man, right?
Yeah, he's one of them.
There are two of us,
so it was kind of a tie.
- Oh, okay.
- Yeah.
So you were
the second-best man?
- Okay.
- No, I'm best-also.
Brett has two best men.
We're both his best men.
It just looked like
Kevin was standing
- closer to Brett...
- Okay, dude, listen.
- We're both...
- I'm kidding. I'm kidding.
- Joking around, just a bit.
- Oh, okay.
- Thank you.
- Thanks, man.
- You do bits now, huh?
- Yeah.
Is that what they do in Hollywood?
They do bits?
Well, I don't live in Hollywood.
I live in echo park.
Echo park?
That sounds very empty.
You don't know
what you're missing, man.
There are so many hot women,
and a lot of them are desperate,
which is really nice.
- You should come visit.
- Yeah, I don't know.
Actually,
this ad agency out there,
they wanna use my illustrations
in one of their campaigns.
And they were like,
"hey, we'll fly you out,
and you can do some concepting
with our creatives."
- But I can't do it.
- That... what, are you too busy?
I just... I can't bring myself
to work with people
who call themselves
"creatives."
Oh, you're a creative?
Ah, you must be very creative.
I can tell by the name
you gave yourself.
It's very creative.
Hey, guys, photo, come on.
Oh, yeah.
Here we go.
Come on, get in here.
All right.
Just the roommates.
Ready?
Oh, and Kevin.
Kev!
- Get in here, man.
- No, come on, let's grab one.
Let's grab one.
Let's grab one.
- Come on.
- Yeah.
- We got it. We got it.
- K-dog, get in here.
- Come on, come on, come on.
- Ready? Ready?
- One, two, three.
- Love these things.
- That's awesome.
- Hi, guys.
- Michelle, hey.
- Hey, how are you?
- Hi, good to see you.
- Good to see you.
- You look so handsome.
- Thank you.
- You all do.
- Thank you.
- Hi.
Hey. Hey.
How you holding up?
- He's good, right?
- Yeah, I'm good, yeah.
Michelle I'm more worried about.
Whew.
She is beautiful.
- Until one of them gets fat.
And that is how my boy Brett
bagged that hottie you see
right next to him right now.
They're one cute ass couple,
huh? No homo.
No homo.
Dad, you know what
I'm talking about.
Seriously, though, man...
You're my best bud.
We're one the same.
Mano a mano.
To Brett and Wendy.
May you have a long
and happy marriage
and an even longer
and happier life.
Aww.
Ladies and gentlemen,
your second-best man,
- aka the ring dropper.
- Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, whoa.
- Oh, excuse me.
- Excuse me.
Okay, okay, hello, test.
Thank you, Kevin, for that...
That heartfelt,
uh, toast-slash-rap,
I guess that was?
- Whatever you were doing.
- Ha-ha!
By the way, I'm... if anybody's
the actual best man tonight,
you know, it's me.
I've been friends with Brett
for a long time.
We go way back.
We were roommates in college.
He's my best friend.
Um, he actually
met his wife, Wendy,
through me and my ex,
who's here tonight, Michelle.
She's brought her friend.
Hey, man, cheers.
Uh, which I'm totally fine with.
Good-good
seeing you guys.
Anyways, the point is
it's not a competition.
We're all here to have fun.
Just wanted to clear the air
a little bit, um...
Jesus Christ.
- Are we okay?
- Are we? I don't know.
You did your thing,
whatever that was, and...
- Oh, yeah.
- I'm gonna try to say something
- actually from the heart here.
- Wrap it up.
Yeah, wrap it up.
Is that with a "w" or an "r"?
What'd you just say?
It's a play on words.
There's homonyms or homophones.
- You just call me a homophobe?
- Hold on, hold on.
Hey, Kev.
- Hey, you got a problem?
- Come on.
- Right now!
- You want to go with me?
- Come on, guys.
You want to go with me?
You know what? Forget it.
Forget it. Forget it.
I'm good.
I'm fine.
Come on, it's a party.
Let's... let's have a good time.
- Hey, dad.
- I can't believe you picked up.
- Yeah, what's going on?
- Listen, we need to get rid
of some things to make
the house more... sellable.
So I need you to come up
and clear out some
of your stuff from your room.
Wait, what are you
talking about?
I've been asking you to clear
that stuff out for years.
You know, your stuff.
All your...
Detritus.
I think we should
just talk about
what we're gonna
do with the house.
We haven't made a decision yet.
Right?
We have to decide together.
- How's Friday?
- What, to decide?
- Mm-hmm.
- Oh, yeah,
I can't do Friday.
- Why?
- Well, because I'm swamped with my book.
In fact, I was just
working on it now.
I'm really busy.
Okay, no, no. No, no.
We'll just leave it like this,
and then you'll be happy
to know it will never be sold.
Dad, come on.
That's not what I'm saying.
I'm saying let's...
Talk about it
and make a decision together.
All right, how about Saturday?
Yeah, Saturday's bad, too.
I'm not available.
Okay, well, what are you doing,
if you don't mind my asking?
Um, I'm, uh...
I'm, uh...
I'm going away, actually.
I'm going to California...
To meet with some creatives.
Yup, it's all good.
It's all good.
All right, see you.
Yes, I love it. Love you.
Love it. All right.
Peace.
Sorry about that.
Just making money.
- There he is.
- What up?
This is Chad.
He's our co-creative director.
What's up, brother?
How are you?
How you doing?
You want some almond water, bro?
- Uh, no, I'm allergic.
- You're allergic to water?
No, to almonds.
Huh, nuts.
Yeah.
Okay, so I don't know how much
you know about appar@us.
Uh, a little bit.
I checked out your website.
Appar@us is a creative company,
and what we're doing is building
- a digital audience, okay?
- Yeah.
- Basically, we sprinkle our
- love of good storytelling...
into brand management,
brand entertainment,
loyalty branding,
and what we're doing is
- building a digital audience.
We've won awards from Cannes,
one show, best show.
We won a couple Clios,
Omma awards, Webbys,
and some from ad age,
digital age, digital ad age.
- - Oh, uh-oh.
Wow.
This is great.
That moment you land
a huge account.
- Congrats. That's awesome.
- Thank you so much.
Yeah, it's a blessing.
So let me cut to the chase.
We like your drawings.
They're, um...
They're simple.
- It's like a kid did them.
- It's insane.
Yeah, and we want to use
your drawings
for this new viral campaign
that we've got.
- It's body spray.
- It's gonna be epic.
Directly targeted at tween boys.
We're gonna use your drawings
for our hero, so to speak,
although he's definitely
not a hero.
- He's a nerd.
- Total loser, you know?
No friends at all,
spends all his time alone,
just drawing in his little
notebook or whatever.
He's got his dick in his hand.
Yeah, but then check this out.
With the help
of blade boy body spray...
- Mm-hmm. - ...He gets
all these "shorties"
on his jock like flies on shit,
and he absolutely
transformifies,
and so do his doodles.
We already hired
this other dope artist
for those drawings
that he was talking about,
- so that...
- Yeah, he's gonna do sort of,
- the badass ones, when, like...
- Uh-huh.
The transformation
takes place, okay?
He's from Japan.
And those are gonna be insane.
They're awesome.
We already
locked him up for those.
Can you guys just...
Excuse me for a second?
Just for one second, thanks.
Thank you.
- Thanks. I'm sorry.
- What's up?
All right, well,
we'll just copy his style.
Cool. I'll just get Nick
to do it.
- That's chill.
- All right.
First voice message.
Dean, what up?
It's, uh, Eric.
Love that you're in L.A.,
I can't hang out tonight
'cause I'm doing something
with my roommate Nicholas,
but I can definitely
hang out tomorrow night,
and we definitely should.
Love you, dude.
I don't know why I said love...
Next message.
Hey, man, it's Paul.
Uh, got your message.
I'm out of town, unfortunately,
but let me know next time
you're in L.A.
Next saved message.
Hey, honey, it's mom.
I love the drawings you sent,
and I know that
it's a lot of work,
but you'll get it done.
Call me if you need
a pep talk, okay?
I miss you. Bye.
Message saved.
Hey, Dean.
Blast from the past.
It's Becca.
I'm sorry I missed your call.
I just got out of
a pretty intense audition.
Give me a ring.
I'm so sorry to hear about
you and Michelle.
- That sucks.
- Yeah, thanks.
That sucks, but I actually...
I totally relate to that.
I'm actually kind of
going through something
kind of similar.
I'm, like, still in
the middle of it, actually.
But not to name any names,
but give you a hint,
he's starring on a, like,
a ridiculously popular
vampire series.
Well, that narrows it down
quite a bit.
It's, like,
all the rage right now.
Vampires are so in,
and I just don't get it.
It's like, I would pick
mummies if I had my way.
Yeah, he likes to, uh...
He likes to play with people,
but me, you know, I don't...
I don't play.
Never.
Do you like vampires?
- Uh, no.
- Okay.
Needless to say, it's
been a whole shitload of drama,
but, you know,
I think I've found something
that is pretty amazing for me.
- Oh, yeah?
- Improv.
- Comedy.
- Ah.
- Improv comedy. Yeah.
- Right, that kind, yeah.
Improv comedy.
- Oh, yeah.
- It's like, um,
where you make stuff
up off the top of your head
and just, like, say shit
for no reason.
- It's amazing.
- Yeah.
"Yes, and," is, like, the...
The philosophy, you know?
And it's starting to,
like, open me up
in auditions a lot, and also...
I feel more open, like, in life.
- Mmm.
- You know?
- I don't know if you can tell how different I am?
- Oh, yeah.
I was gonna say back there
you're very spontaneous.
Yes. Yes, exactly.
And also my hair.
My hair's also different.
Yes, and lighter.
I just made it darker, actually.
- There she is.
- Oh, hey, Vagsicles.
I am what I eat.
- He said as he quivered.
- Oh, god.
These guys are in
my improv troupe.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Guys, this is Dean.
- Hey.
- Dean the Dean
of the university
of first names.
Look at his face.
- Oh...
- You do have, like,
- a funny look, man, like...
- Funny in, like, a good way.
- Yeah.
- Yeah, it's good.
- It's, like, a hilarious face.
- It is.
- Thank you.
- Yeah, it would work good
- on stage, I think.
- Hmm.
Fine.
- Get out of here.
- We reserved this.
- We reserved it for an hour.
- Get out of here.
- Hey, there.
- Hi.
Hi. Are you okay?
Oh, yeah, I'm fine.
Are you talking about that?
- Uh, yeah.
- No, I just tripped.
- It's no big deal.
- No, don't underplay it.
You really ate it back there.
I saw the whole thing.
Well, thank you. I appreciate
you coming up to let me know.
- Mm-hmm.
- Thank you for...
Yeah, that was me.
No, I was feeling a little
too comfortable at the party,
and I saw you, so I figured,
"why don't I eat shit
in the kitchen?"
Oh, good save.
So how do you know Tony?
Uh, Tony?
The owner of the house.
Oh, uh, I saved his life
a while back
and then after that
we just kind of clicked.
Hmm.
- I'm Dean, by the way.
- Hi.
Hey.
Uh, Todd's outside, and
he's here with Jeremy.
- I got to go. Lovely meeting you.
- Oh, yeah, you, too.
Those guys are here,
so you should go.
Yeah.
- Hi.
- I'm poor. You're rich.
Where I'm falling, remember,
I saw your boobs?
We saw y...
We both saw your boobs.
- It was so good.
- I don't like you
saying that when there's other...
They didn't see my...
- This is a scene.
- We're doing scenes.
- We're doing improv.
- We're doing scenes.
Hey, you didn't have to leave.
Just...
Call me later, okay?
Bye.
- Hey.
- Hi.
- Hey.
- Hello.
You never told me your name.
Oh, well, it starts with an "n,"
and it ends with "icky."
Hmm. You're very cryptic,
like sudoku.
Yeah, I like to cultivate an
air of mystery around myself.
I do something
very similar with deodorant.
- Hmm.
- Not in a gross way.
I, you know, I don't need
to wear a lot of deodorant.
I don't, you know,
smell that bad or anything.
- Mmm.
- Good, nice, huh?
Which part of Brooklyn
are you from?
It's that obvious?
Yeah, you have a certain just-
off-the-subway quality to you.
Thank you.
You could just say immigrant.
It's cool.
That's not what I meant.
You don't look lobotomized like the
rest of the guys at this party.
Yeah, I saw a couple
walking head shots downstairs.
Um, so where'd you grow up?
- Nicky, we got to go.
- Oh, okay.
Uh, Dean, this is Jill.
Jill, Dean.
Jill, hey, my best friend
in high school was...
I'm sure it's a great story, but
we're late for a surprise party,
- so I'll just see you in the car?
- Okay.
- Okay.
- Well, you just told me, so...
Well, good luck
in L.A., Dean,
and watch out
for kitchen floors.
I will.
Hey, um, you want to, like,
trade emails or something?
I'm gonna be in town, I don't know,
just for a couple days, but...
- Why don't you just give me your number?
- Okay.
No, it's cool,
I got a pen and paper.
I'll just write it out,
20th century style.
Tiny, little pad.
Yeah, for just little drawings
or phone numbers.
It's, like, a mini pad...
- As opposed to a maxi pad.
- That was good, right?
- That was good.
Is this the way
back to my hotel?
I don't know. Is it?
So where are we?
This is my place.
- Oh.
- Look, I know you want to
come up and everything,
but you can't.
I'm sorry.
Oh, okay.
I'm sorry if I gave you
that impression.
Yeah, I have a boyfriend, so...
- Yeah, I know, the vampire.
- Shh.
Look, what you think
is gonna happen right now
is not gonna happen
right now unless...
You can keep a secret.
I'm not good at keeping secrets.
Ow.
That really hurt.
Don't pretend you didn't
fucking love that.
I'm not pretending.
Come here.
Look at me.
Oh, my god, not like that.
Don't look at me like that.
Okay, hey, Becca,
you're scaring me.
I know.
I'm scaring myself.
But you can't look at me
like that, okay?
You don't get to
look at me like that.
Okay, but you're
hurting my neck.
Oh, my god, it's part of it.
- Ow.
- You got to go, okay?
You just got to go.
Yeah, I should get back.
Yeah.
You need to leave.
- Oh. Can I get a ride?
- Get out of my car.
- No, you can't get a ride.
- Okay.
- Okay.
- After that you want a ride?
Okay, good seeing you.
- Good night.
- Carol?
- Hey.
Oh, hi.
I thought I was
in the wrong house.
Is it okay?
Has everyone left?
Uh, yeah, yeah, all gone.
Coast is clear.
How did we do?
Did any... we did okay?
Yeah, we do have
two very serious
- potential buyers.
- Wow.
Yeah, I think your home is gonna
sell a lot faster than I thought.
- Wow. Great.
- Yeah.
Well, it'll be thanks to you.
Where do you find
all this stuff?
It's, like, do you...
Do you and Patrick travel a lot?
- Patrick?
- Your husband.
No, um, he is not my husband.
- He's my colleague.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
- You thought, uh...
- I assume everyone's married.
- No. No, no, no, no, no.
- If they're together...
- Stupid. Sorry.
- Um, no.
No, it's...
No, it's fine.
Um, well, let's see
if we got any more,
uh, potential bidders.
Wait, wait, wait, what was that?
- That looked like you.
- Uh, you don't want to...
That's embarrassing.
- What is that?
- My charming sister
decided to create an online
dating profile for me,
and I spent, um,
much of yesterday
trying to take a usable photo
to throw myself
at strangers online.
I'm just curious.
"I like listening to jazz..."
oh, sophisticated.
"Taking long walks..."
Forests, one of
your interests is "forests"?
- I've... well, I like...
- You're interested in forests?
Well, I like nature and trees
and, like, being out in nature.
Oh, I see. Yeah, of course.
Well, sure.
- Does that sound weird?
- No, I-i just don't...
- Should I just have said trees?
- No, no, forests... I see.
I just did... you...
The wording.
You don't want to attract, like,
a lumberjack or a hermit or a...
A lumberjack
who's online dating?
I don't think I have
to worry about that.
If you said, "I like
taking long, shady walks,"
- that implies forests.
- That sounds threatening,
like I'm a mugger or something.
I think I'm gonna
sell your house
and leave the online dating
to someone else.
I'm sorry.
Let me see if we got you
any more offers or...
- Okay.
- Interests or calls.
Look, it was a free trip,
so I sat through one meeting.
Exactly, free day in L.A.
You've got me as your guide.
We're gonna do some cool shit.
I got some plans.
Cool.
Have you had smoothie king?
Huh?
- It's funny. It's always a king.
- What?
You know, smoothie king,
burger king, mattress king.
If you're selling something,
it has to be a king.
Smoothie Duke?
Nope.
Burger prime minister?
You can't do it.
What about dairy queen?
That works.
Yeah, okay, that's one.
Hold up.
I left my phone in the car.
- So?
- I want to get my phone.
Yeah, we're going in here for,
like, ten minutes.
Yeah, I want to get my phone.
I need it.
- Great, great, let's do that.
- Thank you.
Heads up.
Thanks, asshole.
Would it kill you to be present
for, like, 30 seconds?
Uh-huh.
Oh, there she is, coming back.
Oh, fuck.
Waiting for party girl to call?
No.
It's not gonna happen, man.
You screwed up.
- She'll call me.
- No, she won't.
Shithead.
You gave her your number
instead of getting her number,
so now she has all the power,
she gets to mess with your head
- instead of you messing with her.
- Yeah, right.
- Uh-huh.
- Right?
You're leaving tomorrow anyway,
so who gives a shit?
You leave tomorrow anyways,
so let's just put her aside.
You and me, tonight, we go out,
and I show you what
you've missed in Brooklyn.
What's that, bar, club?
- A club, yes.
I can't, man.
I got plans.
- Doing what?
- I'm supposed to be...
Hi.
Bye.
I like that shirt.
It's really brave.
Brave?
What does that mean?
Well, I mean, it's just not the
most flattering shirt on you,
but I think it's really cool
that you don't care
about that kind of thing.
It's awesome.
Yeah, it gives you
bigger hips, a little bit.
He's kidding. He's joking.
A joke.
- Shut up.
Wow.
Yeah. Okay.
- Hey.
- Hi.
- How are you?
- Really good.
- Cool.
- Yeah.
Your hair looks a little weird.
Excuse me?
- Excuse me?
- My...
Has anybody ever told you that
you look very attracted to me?
No, not yet.
Well, they have now.
Just did.
- Yeah, you did.
- Cheers.
- Oh, cheers, yeah.
- Cheers.
What are you guys
doing after this?
Um, I don't think...
I don't know.
- After party at our place?
- Who are you doing after this?
- Who are you doing after this?
- What?
Nothing.
Listen, I just want
to apologize again for...
What?
- You know, the ladies.
- Oh, shut up. You're fine.
You're in a funk right now.
I get it, you know?
- I've been there. I can spot it.
- Yeah.
And, honestly, I think
you're over-thinking it.
You just got to do
something spontaneous.
Be a spontaneous person.
Get out of it.
Okay, you know what?
Let me make it up to you.
Why don't I take you out?
- Okay?
- Okay.
Where do you want to go?
You know what we could do?
We could drive
to Vegas right now.
Okay.
- Yeah? You want to do this?
- Yeah. Yeah.
- You're into going to Vegas?
- Totally.
'Cause I'm down.
I'm not saying it like,
"hey, let's just talk about it."
I'm saying let's go and do it.
- We're going to Vegas.
- We're going to Vegas.
- We'll get there.
- Okay.
- I'll show you the ropes.
- All right.
- I'm gonna lay it out there. You'll see what's going on.
- All right.
- You know Vegas?
- Of course I know Vegas.
It's the best.
I love it.
It's just such a hassle.
I mean, it's
four-and-a-half hours away.
Yeah. Want to
get some sleep?
Yeah.
Hey, man, it was
great seeing you.
- Cheers, buddy.
- Cheers.
You going home or on a trip?
- I'm going home.
- Oh, me too, thank god.
- You live in the city?
- Brooklyn.
Oh, good.
I'm on Dekalb and Washington.
I love it.
- Yeah, I'm ready to get back.
- I really love it, though.
New York's the best, period.
No contest.
Even queens.
Yeah, I think I've seen enough
of L.A. to last me for...
Oh...
I'm never going back
to L.A. again.
No, no, no, I can't.
For my health, I can't.
Okay. I'm gonna try
to take a nap.
- I'm pretty tired.
- Oh, yeah.
Naomi.
I'm Naomi, by the way.
Before you, you know.
Good to meet you, Naomi.
Take a nap.
- Your name would be?
- I'm Dean.
Dean.
Put her there.
Yeah.
- Sleep tight.
- Thanks.
I should be sleeping.
I'm exhausted.
I'm so wired from the anxiety,
from the trauma of Los Angeles
that I can't sleep.
I'm not myself.
So what do you do...
For work?
I'm a...
- Speech therapist.
- Oh.
Yeah.
I work with animals.
Mmm. Communication.
How to listen,
how to communicate,
- reading signals.
- Yeah.
- 'Cause they can speak.
- They can communicate.
It's been proven
time and time again.
They are communicating,
but we're so blocked.
Animals, no subtlety.
- It's crass.
- You texting?
- I am.
- Excuse me, excuse me.
- Yeah.
Get in these last moments
while you can
- before she comes around...
and gets ya.
- Sir?
- Yeah.
You have to turn that off.
- Sir?
- Um...
I'm a scientist.
- Hi.
- Hey.
You are a little late, mister.
- Yeah.
- And you brought a suitcase.
Yeah, actually, I was on
my plane and I got your text.
You just, you know,
hopped off the plane
and ran straight over here?
I usually have
that effect on people.
Yeah, yeah.
No, I'm kidding.
Really,
what's with the suitcase?
No, I was staying with
my friend Eric, and...
I'm gonna stay with Eric.
I was staying at a hotel
and going from my hotel
to my friend Eric's place,
and he's still at work,
so I ended up with all my stuff.
- I'm kind of stranded.
- Oh.
Uh, volleyball gear, you know.
So, uh, is this yours?
- Yeah.
- Cool.
Are you fishing
for a ride right now?
Oh, I'm not fishing,
but now that you mention it,
- that would work for me.
- Okay.
- Cool. Great.
- Okay.
- Sure.
- Awesome.
- Um, you gonna drive?
- No, I'm not gonna drive.
- Okay.
- I was just, you know, being polite.
Thanks.
You want the story for real?
Yeah, I'm curious.
All right, I was in college.
I came up with
this natural beauty product,
and I ended up dropping out
'cause I was tinkering with it.
First, I started
giving it to my friends.
Then I started selling it,
and then this
big cosmetics brand
actually bought it,
um, but that was
a couple of years ago,
- so nothing really since.
- Wow.
- Really?
- Mm-hmm.
Wow.
- So you have, like, a patent and everything?
- Yeah.
So you're an inventor?
I think of myself more of,
like, a chef
'cause I came up with, you know,
a few recipes
that actually worked.
- That's amazing.
Seriously. You know,
when I'm drawing,
sometimes I'll come up with,
like, an invention or something
and I'll just do a sketch.
- Really? Like what?
- But nothing like that.
Um, let's see.
- So you're on a plane, right?
- Mm-hmm.
This happens a lot.
Plane's packed.
There's a baby that's
crying super loud.
It's bothering everybody.
How do you get that baby quiet?
Baby silencer.
All right, it's a funnel.
You put it over the baby's
nose and mouth
with a tube, like,
a little kind of tube,
and it goes to headphones
that go to the baby's own ears,
so when the baby's crying
just like,
"wah, wah!" Really loud,
it's contained into the tubes,
and then just like,
"ow, ow, that hurts.
Hello? Wah.
Uh, who is that?
That's me.
I should stop."
Baby silenced.
So what you have is something
that will silence the baby
and also teach the baby
about self-awareness
and cause and effect, so...
You know, I would make sure
that there's adequate
breathing apparatus
and, you know,
holes in it and stuff,
so I'm not gonna do
anything crazy to the baby.
Do you think that that would
actually work for adults
with helping them
develop self-awareness?
Perhaps you could
send the sound of them
pitching an invention
straight into their own ears?
Like in a restaurant
or something?
- Yeah.
- Thank you for dinner.
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
No, it was my pleasure.
- That was fun.
- Yeah.
- I had a good time.
- Me, too.
- And thanks for the ride.
- You're welcome.
Um, okay, so just to be clear.
Mm-hmm?
- Okay.
- Okay.
- I'll get my stuff. All right.
- Okay.
Whoa, okay.
- Hello.
- All right.
There he is.
So this is it.
Um, that's the couch.
That's gonna be, uh...
- All yours.
- Wow.
Assuming that's okay with Tobes.
Totally, no problem.
- Heard you're here stalking some girl.
- What?
Yeah, my friend
stalked a girl once.
She lived in China,
so I'm not sure if it
counted as stalking per se
'cause he was in San Diego.
I contended that
it was more like
keeping tabs on her
from that distance.
- Yeah, I'm not stalking anybody.
- That's exactly what he said.
- Yeah, but I'm not.
- Agree to disagree.
Damn it.
- What did you tell him?
- What? Don't worry about Toby.
He's his own thing, man.
So tell me about this girl.
Oh, well, she drove me back
from the... whoa!
- What the hell is this?
- What?
I have a cat.
You know that.
No, I did not know that.
I do now, though.
And I'll never forget it.
Yeah, I share my room
with Nicholas.
- He loves this shit.
Anyways, the girl,
what's going on?
Uh, yeah, so we, uh...
I'm sorry, I...
- When did you get into cats?
- All right, come on, enough.
- All right.
- I have a cat. Let's move on.
Okay, okay.
Yeah, it went
really well, and, uh,
we're gonna get
together on Tuesday.
- That's great. Day or night?
- Day.
- Day? That's not good.
- Yeah.
- Night. Night.
- What?
You want night time, late.
Her defenses are down.
She's kind of tired.
Okay, I don't want to kill her.
I want to date her.
Date her?
Let's slow down, 1955, okay?
Let's just try
to sleep with her first.
Yeah, I mean, that, too.
That's what I meant.
Here, bud.
- You okay, man?
- Yeah.
- Like, things are okay?
- Yeah, things are great.
Okay.
Do a little bunny hop.
Ahh!
- You all right?
- Yeah, I'm good. I'm good.
I'll be honest,
I didn't mean to fall,
but I did mean
to take the risk, okay?
- And that's how you ride.
- You're the man.
- I feel amazing.
- Race?
Yeah, let's go.
- Hey, dad.
- Oh, you're there.
- Are you back?
- No, I'm still in L.A.
I decided to stay a bit longer.
- What are you doing out there?
- Just working on my tan.
I was gonna maybe get
my chest waxed.
You are?
No, I'm just
catching up with Eric
and just trying to take a little
break, since I'm out here.
A break from what?
You know,
just everything at home.
Things are kind of heavy.
I just want to get
a little breather.
I see.
No, it's a good idea.
- Why don't you go on to Hawaii?
- Okay, I'm not on vacation.
I'm still working on my book.
You know, I can do that
from here, too.
I need to talk to you
about the house.
Okay, okay, right, yeah.
Let's talk about the house.
We had an open house and...
Whoa, wait, wait.
We were gonna make the decision
- about the house together.
- Yeah, we did. I did.
And I...
Since you decided to run away.
Okay, I didn't run away.
I came out to meet
those ad people.
Can we just not do anything
with the house until I get back?
Okay?
Okay.
Well, you know,
you had a really good realtor.
- Yes, well done.
- To full asking price.
Oh, full asking price, yes.
Now how do I break
the news to my son?
Mmm.
Well, we could ask for some
extra time before closing.
People are understanding
about that.
He's just been at loose ends,
kind of, you know,
missing in action for a while.
Now he's in L.A.
I don't know what he's doing.
I keep thinking he's gonna
come home with a Mohawk
and face piercings.
People still get Mohawks?
Oh, if Dean thought it would
help him not get a job,
he'd get two Mohawks.
How do you...
How do you get two Mohawks?
I...
You put two Mohawks
together, and you...
I don't know.
It'd be sort of an "X,"
look like a heliport.
Maybe he's just trying
to figure himself out.
Yeah, he's been
trying for a while.
I'm sorry, I shouldn't
be talking about this.
- I don't want to cross any lines.
- Don't be silly.
You've already
crossed those lines,
and that's okay.
Okay.
Mmm, why don't I look
for some listings,
and we'll maybe look at
some places later this week?
- All right, sounds good.
- Yeah?
- It's a date.
- Hi.
- Hey.
- Hi.
- How are you?
- It's good to see you. Hey.
- Hi, you, too.
Um, you remember my friend Jill
from the party the other night?
- Yeah, hey, Jill.
- Hey.
Hey. Okay.
- She wanted to see the show too, so...
- Cool.
- So...
- You were wearing that same outfit
- the last time I saw you.
- Yes, I was.
Thank you for pointing
that out, I appreciate that.
We need to find a restroom,
like, right now.
Oh, yeah, uh, number one only.
- Hey.
- Hi.
- So I'm gonna go.
- Okay, bye.
- Yeah, I got to go.
- Really?
That's the game
you're gonna play?
- Oh, I'm not playing a game.
- Oh, aren't you?
- I can stay for a few.
- Thanks.
- So, okay, the artist...
- Nicky, come look at this.
- Oh, okay.
- Yeah.
Oh, yeah, hey, uh...
Just a sec.
Yeah, I can be there in,
like, ten minutes.
Yeah, totally.
Weird reception out here.
Yeah, in your face so hard.
I was just doing a bit.
Are you gonna stay,
or are you gonna go?
Um, I'll stay.
- Phew, what a relief.
- Yeah.
Uh, so Jill's, like,
your best friend?
- Is that the deal?
- Mm-hmm, yeah.
And you guys just
do everything together?
A lot of stuff.
You show up everywhere with her?
That's normal?
Do you have a best friend?
Um, kind of.
Former, I'd say.
- He ditched you?
- He got married.
But... we weren't romantic.
It's not like that.
- No, I get it.
- Yeah.
But you're a little sad
about it.
- Mmm, no, I think I'm...
- Nicky...
Look at this one.
Isn't his work powerful?
I want to put it above my bed.
Dean?
Hey.
Is that that guy
from that vampire show?
- That's Dean, huh?
- Yeah.
- Hey, Becca.
- Hi.
I thought you went
back to New York.
I extended my trip a little bit.
- Why don't you just get back to New York now?
- Yeah.
- I'm pretty sure she doesn't want to see you ever again.
- I don't.
Just so you know...
- We're done.
- Done.
- Me and you?
- Mm-hmm.
- Okay, yeah, I'm pretty sure we never started.
- Oh, my god.
All right, well, let's make
things real simple here, okay?
Why don't you just end
whatever you had going on
and just agree to
never talk to her again?
- Okay.
- Don't say another word to her
starting now.
- Okay.
- Ah! Not one more word.
- He got it.
- I'm sorry.
What was that?
- I just heard something.
- Let's go.
- Okay, okay, okay.
- You want it on the other side of the face?
- Oh, my god.
- You're in an art gallery right now.
- No, come on, you...
- I think he's really sorry
and he's not gonna say
another word.
- Hey, look at me. Come here.
- What?
- I'm sorry. I'm good, yeah?
- Look at me.
Oh, my god,
I'm... oh, yeah, yeah.
- Yeah.
- Uh-huh.
- Are you okay?
- I am, thank you.
Thanks.
I appreciate that.
That fake vampire, he's just
lucky I didn't lose my shit.
- Oh.
- Could kill a man, you know?
I took Kendo
in high school, so...
Is that...
Does that require sticks?
Not the way I do it.
By the way, Becca...
I mean...
There's nothing there.
- I don't know what she's... - oh, you
don't have to explain anything to me.
- I...
- No, I know, I know.
I know, I just... I figured
I'd just let you know.
You know, it's not like we're...
- Yeah, I mean, we're just...
- Yeah, we're hanging out.
- It's fine, yeah.
- I mean, you're visiting.
- Yeah, yeah.
- And I'm going out of town this weekend...
- Yeah. - ...So it's not
even like I'm around.
- You going out of town?
- Yeah.
Jill and I are gonna
drive up to San Francisco.
Cool.
That's nice, yeah.
It's funny, my friend Eric
and I were actually
gonna head out of town
this weekend.
He was gonna show me
the bay area.
- Really?
- Yeah, some of the sights.
- Oh.
- Mm-hmm.
Well, I mean, I guess
the four of us could...
- Yeah.
- Go together.
- Yeah.
- If that's not too weird.
No, no, I think that's cool
if it's cool with you guys.
- Yeah.
- You know, it was gonna be a guys' trip,
but, um, I'll check with him.
- Hey.
- Hey, Jill, this is Eric,
- Dean's friend.
- Hey.
Uh, well, actually,
Dean's my friend.
I'm kind of, like,
the main dude, I guess.
Right, we got it.
Oh, yeah?
Well, okay, cool.
Are you guys doing good?
Jill, you okay?
Excuse me?
I just, you know, I didn't know.
It seems like you're kind of,
like, upset or maybe,
like, stressed out
about something, you know?
No.
Oh, oh, are you, like,
one of those, like,
pickup artist dudes?
Like, you're gonna,
like, take me down a peg,
and then say something like,
"oh, that's so cool how you're
comfortable being fat,"
or something, and then
I'll feel bad about myself
and sleep with you,
or something stupid?
- Uh...
- No, he's...
He's on the spectrum, actually.
He's got Asperger's
and he's not that great
at reading other people, so...
Asper... do I?
He can't even read
himself, actually.
It's okay, man.
Sorry.
No, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to just
attack you like that.
I'm just... I'm really
sick of guys trying to
insecurize me into sleeping
with them, so I just...
- Yeah.
- I hear you.
Yeah. Cool.
Remember to make
eye contact if you can.
- Thanks.
- Sure.
All right.
- So this is nature.
- Mm-hmm.
All right, so let's talk
about our game plan.
All right. Um, I think
we're gonna go on a hike.
- So what does that entail?
Um, walking along this trail?
Ah, yeah, now I can feel it.
Hey, Toby. What?
Well, what happened?
Oh, Jesus.
God.
Toby knocked a bookshelf
on top of Nicholas,
and he's in critical condition.
- Oh, my god.
- Who's Nicholas?
- It's his cat.
- He's not just a cat, okay?
- Okay.
- You know he's not just a cat.
- All right.
- Look, I'm sorry.
I have to go to the airport
right now, okay?
- I'm sorry.
- Eric?
- No, just stay with him, okay?
- Hey.
- I'm on my way.
Guys,
I got to go now. I'm sorry.
All right, all right, all right.
Hey, you've reached Dean.
- I can't come to my phone right now.
- Thank you.
But here's my best
robot impression:
- - Hi, it's your dad.
Um, please call me.
It's important.
I have some news.
- Whoa, whoa, hold on, hold on.
- What? What?
Just take a breath.
- He's gonna be okay.
It's okay.
He's gonna be fine.
I don't know what
I'm gonna do if he dies, okay?
- He's not gonna die.
- Okay.
All right?
Cats are resilient.
Yeah, you're right.
You're right.
Especially Nicholas.
He's got such a strong spirit.
Yeah, yeah, I got that from him.
Yeah.
What about you?
Um, you know,
I haven't gotten to know
- Nicholas that well, but, yeah.
- No, no, I mean you and her.
Nicky?
Yeah. Yeah, I'm good.
All right, just be slow
and be cool, okay?
Yeah.
- All right?
- Yeah, I'll be cool.
- All right, come here.
- All right.
Take care of yourself, man.
Sorry that you
can't crash with us.
Jill's mom is really weird
about having guys over.
No, it's fine, I wouldn't
want me over there anyway.
Oh, yeah?
Why's that?
I'm a bed-wetter.
- Really?
- Yeah. I don't pee in the bed.
It's more into it
from a short distance,
but it's kind of the same thing.
- You're such a dork.
- I thought that was funny.
It was okay.
Thank you, Jill.
Thank you for that.
Drive safely.
I'll be thinking of you
as I pee into my bed tonight.
Ladies.
Hello, you have reached Robert.
Sorry I missed your call.
Please leave a message,
and I'll do my best
to return it as soon as I can.
Yes?
- Hey.
- Hi.
- What are you doing here?
- Well...
I was on my way to Jill's
and I realized
- that I forgot something.
- You forgot something?
Sorry,
I'm not very good at improv.
No, it was really sexy.
- Come on in.
- Okay.
Oh, look at this
disgusting place.
Pretty gross, huh?
What about that play?
What'd you think?
It was so great.
- Wasn't it?
- Thank you.
Yeah, it was...
It was, uh...
- Very complex and interesting.
- The performances were amazing.
- Great performances.
- Wow.
Yup, yup.
Good production.
- Worth that money.
Yeah.
Okay, I have
a confession to make.
I didn't understand most of
what we saw in that theater.
- I'm sorry.
- Oh.
I looked over at you,
and you looked like
- you were utterly engrossed.
- I know, I'm sorry.
- I just... I didn't get it. I...
- Well...
I didn't understand a thing.
- Really?
- Not a thing.
What? Were they...
- What was that?
- Was it about time travel?
No, that... those, I
think, were flashbacks.
That was her as a younger woman.
- That was the same?
- Yes, that was the same woman.
Ah, that doesn't help.
It was fun.
I'm glad we went.
It was an incredible
production of just a...
- Of a crazy...
- Terrible, terrible play.
- Crazy-ass play, yeah.
- Mm-hmm.
Well...
Well, good night.
Would you like to
come up for a coffee?
Yes. I'd love to.
Oh, man.
Okay, you're not allowed
to judge my apartment.
I didn't know
you were coming in,
and there's papers
all over the table, so...
Sure.
I-I'm sorry. I, um...
I'm sort of stuck here.
I don't think I can...
I shouldn't have, uh,
made the first move.
I think I was too forward.
No, no, no, no, no.
I, uh, I don't know what it is,
but it's...
I really like you.
No, and...
But?
But...
Well, truth is...
I don't quite know who I am.
You know, since...
Since my...
My wife, uh...
- Oh.
- Do you understand?
- I mean...
- It's okay.
It seemed like such a good idea.
- Of course.
- Um...
- I get it.
- Um...
That is just my luck, man.
I finally meet a guy
I really like
and turns out he's married.
I guess that's it, yeah.
Good night, Robert.
Nicky?
- Hmm?
- You awake?
Mm-hmm.
Oh, okay.
Hey.
I was just realizing
that I, um...
I forgot to mention
something to you...
That I probably
should have told you.
What?
Um...
I was engaged.
Yeah, not anymore.
We broke up
a few months ago, but...
I realized I never said
anything to you about it,
so I figured I should
tell you, you know?
My mom was sick,
and I guess I wanted her
to know that I found my person.
So I think if my mom
hadn't gotten sick,
then Michelle and I
probably wouldn't have
even gotten engaged.
We probably would have
broken up a while ago,
but I thought
I should just tell you.
Is your mom okay now?
Uh...
No.
No, she's not, but...
- I'm so sorry.
- Oh, no, no, it's...
I'm fine, thanks.
I appreciate it.
Yeah, I haven't really
wanted to talk about it
so much since she died,
but I don't know.
I feel like I can talk to you.
It's funny, I didn't even want
to come out to California,
and then I met you,
and now I feel like it
kind of makes sense,
like, why I ended up out
here in the first place.
I'm glad I met you.
You know, while we're talking,
I probably should
tell you one other thing.
I'm pretty sure I'm falling
in love with you.
What?
I said... I mean...
- I think you're great.
- Uh...
Okay, well-well,
thank you.
- That's...
- Sure.
That's a really...
that's a really
lovely thing to say.
- Good night.
- Good night.
Okay, you ready?
- Yeah.
- Good.
How do I look?
Um, you look a little stiff.
It's okay,
just take a deep breath.
- Yeah, thanks.
- Take a deep breath, okay?
Okay, well, my mom's
gonna be really excited.
Yeah.
My dad says she's having
a good day today.
- I thought I heard voices.
- Hello.
- Hey.
- Hi. You need a haircut.
Oh, Michelle brought
your favorite flowers.
And she's got something
on her finger.
- Yup. All right, let's...
- Hi.
- Hello.
Happy birthday.
How are you?
Sir? You have a note.
Thanks.
Dear Dean,
I didn't want to wake you
up this morning,
so I thought I'd leave you
a note, 20th century style.
I realized I haven't been
completely honest
with you, either.
Last night
when we were talking in bed
there was something
I should have told you.
The truth is, I'm married.
It looks weird even writing it
because we're separated
and have been for some time,
but it's still something
we're trying to figure out.
The night that I met you,
my husband Jeremy
actually came to that party.
Uh, Todd's outside,
and he's here with Jeremy.
I'm sorry. I got to go.
It was lovely meeting you.
Yeah, those guys are here,
so you should go.
I enjoyed hanging out with you
and didn't think
much beyond that,
and then things just happened.
Along the way Jill kept telling
me I should talk to you.
She felt like
I was leading you on,
but I couldn't find
the right moment to bring it up.
For what it's worth,
I thought we were
just having fun.
I guess I was trying to run away
from all the heaviness
in my life.
I hope that makes sense.
I just have a lot
I still need to deal with.
Maybe we both do.
I hope you find
what you're looking for.
Let me know when you do.
Maybe we'll be on
the same road by then.
Either way,
I'm still glad I met you.
Take care of yourself, Nicky.
I just don't know
what you're doing.
What am I supposed to be doing?
I just took a trip,
and now I'm here.
Even when you're here,
you're not here.
Wherever you are,
I need you to come back.
Okay, um, to where?
Should I come home maybe?
Oh, I forgot.
You sold our house.
You sold mom's house while
I was away, so that's gone.
Oh, I see.
I get it.
I see the problem.
What exactly
did you want me to do?
Just go on living there alone?
No, I don't know
what I want you to do.
I just... I want to stop
living under this cloud.
I want to stop talking
about life and death
and how I'm not grieving right.
We're not helping each other,
so why don't we just stop?
Okay.
No, I think that
sounds very healthy.
I'm glad we had this talk.
Listen, I wanted to apologize
for my performance
at your wedding.
Oh, dude, stop.
No, I feel like I was a little
out of control there,
and seeing Michelle
kind of threw me,
and I don't know.
I'm sorry.
- Thanks.
- Don't worry about it.
- Hey, how's your dad doing?
- He's okay, I guess.
We don't talk much
these days, but,
you know,
he's got his therapist,
so I guess he's fine.
Yeah, I remember
after my dad died.
My whole family practically,
you know, disintegrated,
and I was just...
I think a year after
was somehow harder
than right after.
Yeah, definitely.
You know, people...
They don't think about it
when they see you,
don't ask how you're doing
or think that you might
actually feel worse now
than you did then.
You realize the world
just keeps on going.
It doesn't really care.
What about now?
I don't know.
I mean, it was so long ago now.
Sometimes I'll fantasize
about it, you know?
What would it be like
if he hadn't died?
We're never gonna
not miss them, you know?
First big thing in your life that
you're never gonna get over.
- It sucks.
- It sucks.
Yeah.
Look, man,
whatever's going on
with you and your dad,
just remember to go easy
on each other, okay?
You hungry?
- Not really.
- Yeah, me neither.
- Want to eat?
- Yeah.
Okay, let's go.
Next saved message.
Hey, honey, mom here.
I just got your message,
and I...
I just want to say don't worry.
Take a deep breath.
I know you can do it.
Oh, and don't forget to eat.
Okay, love you.
So have you met your neighbors?
No, not officially,
but, uh, a lot of
their dogs have,
uh, become acquainted
with my crotch.
I always liked that picture
of you and mom.
Yeah, me, too.
Nice view.
Yeah, yeah.
And if you put your cheek
against the window,
you can see central park.
Yeah, that's nice.
Yeah, leaves will be
changing soon.
Uh, dad,
I wanted to talk to you.
About the house?
No.
You were right.
I... I disappeared
there for a while.
It's okay.
You don't need to apologize.
No, I do.
I was running and I'm sorry.
I just...
You know, I think
about mom every day.
I'll pass that bookstore
where we used to meet up,
or smell her perfume, or just...
It's just...
She's everywhere, you know?
No matter what I do,
I just keep thinking
about her every day.
Even when I try not to.
So many things remind me
of her, and, uh...
Dad, I can't even imagine
what you've been going through.
- I'm sorry.
- It's okay.
- It's okay. I know. I know.
- It's okay.
- I'm sorry.
No. No, no.
Sit down.
I'm worried about you.
I know you are,
but don't worry about me.
I'm gonna be fine.
I'm not sure when,
but I'm sure I'm gonna be fine.
- Yeah.
- I miss your mom...
A lot.
That's not gonna stop,
but I can't tell you
how lucky I feel
that I got to be with her
as long as I did.
- Yeah.
- And how lucky I feel that we had you.
It's good to have you back.
Don't you disappear on me, okay?
I won't.
You, too.
- Oh, I'm not gonna disappear.
- Okay.
You know where to find me.
- I'm here. It's a deal.
- Okay.
And, um...
Let me share something with you.
Dear Eric,
I'm so sorry for your loss.
I know Nicholas
was more than a cat,
he was a good friend
and he offered you
great support.
Losing him probably feels like
losing a part of yourself.
I've been there.
In the coming months,
you might feel
more lost than you do now
and you might feel like
you need to run away
from all the heaviness
for a while.
Maybe you'll fly across
the country to escape the pain,
and maybe while you're away
your dad will go and sell
all of your cat furniture,
the last real link you thought
you had to Nicholas.
It might be hard
to understand now,
but maybe your dad did it
because he just needed
to do it to move forward.
I wish there was something
I could say
that would make you feel better,
but the hard truth
is that Nicholas is gone,
and there's nothing
that will bring him back.
Not old cat furniture,
personal belongings,
or even voice messages from him
that you've carefully saved.
Nothing can replace him,
but that doesn't mean
you won't be okay again.
You know, when you lose someone,
it can make you feel so alone...
But there's one thing
I've learned...
If you really love them,
you never lose them.
Especially if they had
a strong spirit.
Anyway, here's a copy
of my new book.
I can't say
it holds any answers,
but maybe it'll give you a laugh
and that's worth something.
Take care of yourself, buddy.
Your friend, Dean.
Hey, Dean, it's mom.
I just wanted to tell you
your dad and I had
the best time with you
and Michelle last night.
It was so fun visiting
you guys in Brooklyn.
Anyway, I'll talk to you soon
and love you, bye.
Message saved.
Hi, it's your dad.
I'm, uh, hoping you're alive.
If so, call me because
I have some important news.
Message erased.
My father's always been
full of important news.
This week's important news?
He got a new pair of jeans.
Dad's an engineer, so, to him,
life is basically a series
of problems to be solved,
and his approach to grieving
has been no exception.
Thanks to his therapist, Tim,
dad is taking walks,
reading books, watching DVDs.
Everything is about taking
productive steps forward
even if he isn't totally ready.
And this dinosaur
no longer roams the earth.
- Really? Since when?
- About eight years ago.
I can set you up with basically
an updated version of that
which is this one right here.
- Do you watch TV?
- Yeah, I watch TV.
You can watch TV on the phone.
I'll just watch it on my TV.
I, on the other hand,
have been focusing less
on moving forward and more on
just sitting around,
thinking.
Work hasn't been going
too well, either.
I just missed the third official
final deadline for my book.
My first book
did pretty well, actually.
One critic said it was,
quote, "full of whimsy."
I'll take it.
I'm excited about the new book,
but, I don't know,
I guess I've just hit a wall.
It's not that I can't come up
with new drawings,
it's more that they all seem
to be about one subject.
On top of that,
an uninvited guest
has started to show up
in my work.
And he won't seem to leave.
Meanwhile, dad has now
entered what seems to be
some sort of cross-training
phase of grief.
I can't say I understand
what he's doing,
but we've never really
understood each other,
so why start now?
When are you gonna get
a haircut?
I have not seen
your forehead in 15 years.
- With the hair again?
- You're living in the '60s.
What is that?
Are those the '60s?
- Yeah.
- Oh.
- It's done.
- I'm in a conga line,
and I'm playing a slide whistle.
That wasn't a conga line.
I was doing
the hare Krishna thing.
- Looks like a conga line.
- I see.
Look, I'm...
I'm going to talk to you
about, uh, some news.
Mm-hmm?
I'm gonna sell the house.
- What are you talking about?
- I'm selling the house.
You're just out of the blue
gonna sell our house?
It's not out of the blue.
I've given it
some thought, okay?
I can't live there.
It's ridiculous.
It makes no sense for me
to stay there.
- It's too big.
- It's too big?
- Yeah.
- Could you just, like,
not use all the rooms
or something?
Maybe you could, like,
I don't know,
cover up the furniture in some
of the rooms with sheets.
- Just don't go in there.
- Wha... like I'm a countess?
I don't know.
I just think this is hasty.
You know,
we need to talk about this.
I grew up there.
I don't wanna just
sell our house.
- Dean, it...
Oh, my god, that's my phone.
That's my new phone.
Sorry.
Here we go.
Um, I can't talk now.
I'm with my son.
You see, I'm busy?
It can't see you.
It's more of a voice thing.
Oh, you think it can't see me?
Yeah, dream on.
They know what's going on
at the other end of this thing.
- There.
Oh! I just took a picture
of my sandwich.
Okay, hang on.
Hang on.
Come on.
Oh, good.
- Smooth.
- You know, speaking of Tim,
I really think you should
give him another chance.
- He's really helped me a lot.
- I appreciate it, dad,
but I'm more of, like,
a self-help kind of guy
- than the guidance and the exercises and...
- Yeah.
The books and all that stuff,
it's just...
That doesn't help me.
- Mm-hmm.
- You know...
And Michelle,
that's got nothing to do with
losing your mom?
It's more complicated than that.
I always liked Michelle.
You guys were good together.
Yeah, I know.
You should see us apart, though.
We're really great.
- I don't need it back.
I don't want it back.
It's yours.
- Tell me, what am I supposed to do with it?
- Do what you want with it.
You can put it on a bracelet
maybe like as a charm?
Oh, wow.
Why don't we think of it
as a keepsake?
Oh, yeah, that's a great idea.
"Oh, this?
This is just my former
engagement ring.
Oh, well, see,
when I got un-proposed to,
I decided to turn it
into a charm."
- Okay. - "So I could always remember
that time I didn't get married."
That's a really great idea.
I did not unpropose to you.
Our relationship...
Kind of eroded over time.
Like...
Like a coastline.
Or, like, some rocks.
So... I'm sand?
We both are,
if you think about it.
Never speak of a woman
in geological terms.
That was Brett's takeaway
from the whole relationship.
This was the kind of advice
that comes from a man
who had recently
walked into scaffolding
because he was Googling himself
on his new face gear.
Can you take those things off,
by the way?
- I just... I can't.
- These?
- Yeah.
- Why?
They're so comfortable.
It's the...
I feel like
you're flying something.
Just take them off.
Miraculously,
Brett is getting married,
and I'm gonna be his best man.
Well, one of them.
The other one is Kevin,
his new business partner
who I guess needs
a best friend or something
'cause he's moving in on mine.
Anyway, I'm really happy
for Brett.
His fiance's great.
They're getting a new place
on the upper West Side,
and, you know, his life
is really coming together.
And me?
Well, yesterday I drew this.
Truth is, I don't know if I've ever met
anyone else who's quite like Michelle.
Maybe I made a mistake,
you know?
Maybe we should give it
another shot.
- I don't know.
- What are you talking about?
- We had a lot of good memories.
- Whoa, whoa, stop.
Look at me.
Focus.
You need to take some time alone
to deal with some things.
- I am alone.
- Well, all the stuff that you
and your dad are going
through right now,
the answer's not a woman, Dean.
It's you.
Yeah.
You just read that
off the Internet?
Yeah, just now.
You like that?
- Yeah, very wise.
- Thank you very much, yeah.
Wise guy.
- Ah, uh, Patrick?
- Yes.
- Robert? Yes, yes, hi.
- Yes? Yeah, good.
- Nice to meet you.
- Good to meet you in person.
- Hey, uh, this is Carol.
- Oh.
Sorry, I was just
checking out your veranda.
Oh, fantastic.
Good. Hi.
- Hi.
- Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.
- Carol, it is?
- Carol, yes.
- Carol, okay.
Well, this is it.
This is the whole.
This is the, uh...
- This is the family room.
- Oh, uh...
- Carol.
- No, I...
Sometimes I react without...
But...
- No, no.
- No, this is a great house.
I've kind of let it
get away from me a bit.
Perhaps for the open house
we could do
- with a little bit of staging.
- Yeah, maybe a new sofa?
- Oh.
- Definitely a new sofa.
- Okay.
- Cat?
Oh, no, that's...
That's my son.
My son, yeah.
He's, uh,
he's an adult now,
at least numerically,
and completely house trained.
- Oh.
- That's great.
It's like my nephew.
My sister's got him
on one of those leashes,
which I'm sure
is not gonna add
to any weird issues later on.
Oh, yeah.
But he's really good
at chasing balls.
- Does he live nearby?
- Uh...
- Your son?
- No, uh, yeah, he's in Brooklyn now.
No, but I work in the city, so I see
him whenever he needs something.
- So you live here alone?
- Yes, uh, since my wife died.
It's just me.
- Oh, I'm sorry, Robert.
- No, no, it's okay.
I've got a terrific therapist.
I'm reading all the books
you're supposed to read, so...
- Yeah, there you go.
- Let me just, uh, show you the kitchen.
Uh, hold my calls.
This way.
Man, I haven't seen you
in a long time.
Yeah, I got to fly all the way to
Brett's wedding to see my friend?
- What the hell is that?
- I know.
You have got to be the oldest ring
bearer I've ever seen in my life.
Yeah, I'm not the ring bearer.
I'm the best man, but...
Sorry you didn't make
the cut, buddy.
I'm pretty sure Kevin
was the best man, right?
Yeah, he's one of them.
There are two of us,
so it was kind of a tie.
- Oh, okay.
- Yeah.
So you were
the second-best man?
- Okay.
- No, I'm best-also.
Brett has two best men.
We're both his best men.
It just looked like
Kevin was standing
- closer to Brett...
- Okay, dude, listen.
- We're both...
- I'm kidding. I'm kidding.
- Joking around, just a bit.
- Oh, okay.
- Thank you.
- Thanks, man.
- You do bits now, huh?
- Yeah.
Is that what they do in Hollywood?
They do bits?
Well, I don't live in Hollywood.
I live in echo park.
Echo park?
That sounds very empty.
You don't know
what you're missing, man.
There are so many hot women,
and a lot of them are desperate,
which is really nice.
- You should come visit.
- Yeah, I don't know.
Actually,
this ad agency out there,
they wanna use my illustrations
in one of their campaigns.
And they were like,
"hey, we'll fly you out,
and you can do some concepting
with our creatives."
- But I can't do it.
- That... what, are you too busy?
I just... I can't bring myself
to work with people
who call themselves
"creatives."
Oh, you're a creative?
Ah, you must be very creative.
I can tell by the name
you gave yourself.
It's very creative.
Hey, guys, photo, come on.
Oh, yeah.
Here we go.
Come on, get in here.
All right.
Just the roommates.
Ready?
Oh, and Kevin.
Kev!
- Get in here, man.
- No, come on, let's grab one.
Let's grab one.
Let's grab one.
- Come on.
- Yeah.
- We got it. We got it.
- K-dog, get in here.
- Come on, come on, come on.
- Ready? Ready?
- One, two, three.
- Love these things.
- That's awesome.
- Hi, guys.
- Michelle, hey.
- Hey, how are you?
- Hi, good to see you.
- Good to see you.
- You look so handsome.
- Thank you.
- You all do.
- Thank you.
- Hi.
Hey. Hey.
How you holding up?
- He's good, right?
- Yeah, I'm good, yeah.
Michelle I'm more worried about.
Whew.
She is beautiful.
- Until one of them gets fat.
And that is how my boy Brett
bagged that hottie you see
right next to him right now.
They're one cute ass couple,
huh? No homo.
No homo.
Dad, you know what
I'm talking about.
Seriously, though, man...
You're my best bud.
We're one the same.
Mano a mano.
To Brett and Wendy.
May you have a long
and happy marriage
and an even longer
and happier life.
Aww.
Ladies and gentlemen,
your second-best man,
- aka the ring dropper.
- Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, whoa.
- Oh, excuse me.
- Excuse me.
Okay, okay, hello, test.
Thank you, Kevin, for that...
That heartfelt,
uh, toast-slash-rap,
I guess that was?
- Whatever you were doing.
- Ha-ha!
By the way, I'm... if anybody's
the actual best man tonight,
you know, it's me.
I've been friends with Brett
for a long time.
We go way back.
We were roommates in college.
He's my best friend.
Um, he actually
met his wife, Wendy,
through me and my ex,
who's here tonight, Michelle.
She's brought her friend.
Hey, man, cheers.
Uh, which I'm totally fine with.
Good-good
seeing you guys.
Anyways, the point is
it's not a competition.
We're all here to have fun.
Just wanted to clear the air
a little bit, um...
Jesus Christ.
- Are we okay?
- Are we? I don't know.
You did your thing,
whatever that was, and...
- Oh, yeah.
- I'm gonna try to say something
- actually from the heart here.
- Wrap it up.
Yeah, wrap it up.
Is that with a "w" or an "r"?
What'd you just say?
It's a play on words.
There's homonyms or homophones.
- You just call me a homophobe?
- Hold on, hold on.
Hey, Kev.
- Hey, you got a problem?
- Come on.
- Right now!
- You want to go with me?
- Come on, guys.
You want to go with me?
You know what? Forget it.
Forget it. Forget it.
I'm good.
I'm fine.
Come on, it's a party.
Let's... let's have a good time.
- Hey, dad.
- I can't believe you picked up.
- Yeah, what's going on?
- Listen, we need to get rid
of some things to make
the house more... sellable.
So I need you to come up
and clear out some
of your stuff from your room.
Wait, what are you
talking about?
I've been asking you to clear
that stuff out for years.
You know, your stuff.
All your...
Detritus.
I think we should
just talk about
what we're gonna
do with the house.
We haven't made a decision yet.
Right?
We have to decide together.
- How's Friday?
- What, to decide?
- Mm-hmm.
- Oh, yeah,
I can't do Friday.
- Why?
- Well, because I'm swamped with my book.
In fact, I was just
working on it now.
I'm really busy.
Okay, no, no. No, no.
We'll just leave it like this,
and then you'll be happy
to know it will never be sold.
Dad, come on.
That's not what I'm saying.
I'm saying let's...
Talk about it
and make a decision together.
All right, how about Saturday?
Yeah, Saturday's bad, too.
I'm not available.
Okay, well, what are you doing,
if you don't mind my asking?
Um, I'm, uh...
I'm, uh...
I'm going away, actually.
I'm going to California...
To meet with some creatives.
Yup, it's all good.
It's all good.
All right, see you.
Yes, I love it. Love you.
Love it. All right.
Peace.
Sorry about that.
Just making money.
- There he is.
- What up?
This is Chad.
He's our co-creative director.
What's up, brother?
How are you?
How you doing?
You want some almond water, bro?
- Uh, no, I'm allergic.
- You're allergic to water?
No, to almonds.
Huh, nuts.
Yeah.
Okay, so I don't know how much
you know about appar@us.
Uh, a little bit.
I checked out your website.
Appar@us is a creative company,
and what we're doing is building
- a digital audience, okay?
- Yeah.
- Basically, we sprinkle our
- love of good storytelling...
into brand management,
brand entertainment,
loyalty branding,
and what we're doing is
- building a digital audience.
We've won awards from Cannes,
one show, best show.
We won a couple Clios,
Omma awards, Webbys,
and some from ad age,
digital age, digital ad age.
- - Oh, uh-oh.
Wow.
This is great.
That moment you land
a huge account.
- Congrats. That's awesome.
- Thank you so much.
Yeah, it's a blessing.
So let me cut to the chase.
We like your drawings.
They're, um...
They're simple.
- It's like a kid did them.
- It's insane.
Yeah, and we want to use
your drawings
for this new viral campaign
that we've got.
- It's body spray.
- It's gonna be epic.
Directly targeted at tween boys.
We're gonna use your drawings
for our hero, so to speak,
although he's definitely
not a hero.
- He's a nerd.
- Total loser, you know?
No friends at all,
spends all his time alone,
just drawing in his little
notebook or whatever.
He's got his dick in his hand.
Yeah, but then check this out.
With the help
of blade boy body spray...
- Mm-hmm. - ...He gets
all these "shorties"
on his jock like flies on shit,
and he absolutely
transformifies,
and so do his doodles.
We already hired
this other dope artist
for those drawings
that he was talking about,
- so that...
- Yeah, he's gonna do sort of,
- the badass ones, when, like...
- Uh-huh.
The transformation
takes place, okay?
He's from Japan.
And those are gonna be insane.
They're awesome.
We already
locked him up for those.
Can you guys just...
Excuse me for a second?
Just for one second, thanks.
Thank you.
- Thanks. I'm sorry.
- What's up?
All right, well,
we'll just copy his style.
Cool. I'll just get Nick
to do it.
- That's chill.
- All right.
First voice message.
Dean, what up?
It's, uh, Eric.
Love that you're in L.A.,
I can't hang out tonight
'cause I'm doing something
with my roommate Nicholas,
but I can definitely
hang out tomorrow night,
and we definitely should.
Love you, dude.
I don't know why I said love...
Next message.
Hey, man, it's Paul.
Uh, got your message.
I'm out of town, unfortunately,
but let me know next time
you're in L.A.
Next saved message.
Hey, honey, it's mom.
I love the drawings you sent,
and I know that
it's a lot of work,
but you'll get it done.
Call me if you need
a pep talk, okay?
I miss you. Bye.
Message saved.
Hey, Dean.
Blast from the past.
It's Becca.
I'm sorry I missed your call.
I just got out of
a pretty intense audition.
Give me a ring.
I'm so sorry to hear about
you and Michelle.
- That sucks.
- Yeah, thanks.
That sucks, but I actually...
I totally relate to that.
I'm actually kind of
going through something
kind of similar.
I'm, like, still in
the middle of it, actually.
But not to name any names,
but give you a hint,
he's starring on a, like,
a ridiculously popular
vampire series.
Well, that narrows it down
quite a bit.
It's, like,
all the rage right now.
Vampires are so in,
and I just don't get it.
It's like, I would pick
mummies if I had my way.
Yeah, he likes to, uh...
He likes to play with people,
but me, you know, I don't...
I don't play.
Never.
Do you like vampires?
- Uh, no.
- Okay.
Needless to say, it's
been a whole shitload of drama,
but, you know,
I think I've found something
that is pretty amazing for me.
- Oh, yeah?
- Improv.
- Comedy.
- Ah.
- Improv comedy. Yeah.
- Right, that kind, yeah.
Improv comedy.
- Oh, yeah.
- It's like, um,
where you make stuff
up off the top of your head
and just, like, say shit
for no reason.
- It's amazing.
- Yeah.
"Yes, and," is, like, the...
The philosophy, you know?
And it's starting to,
like, open me up
in auditions a lot, and also...
I feel more open, like, in life.
- Mmm.
- You know?
- I don't know if you can tell how different I am?
- Oh, yeah.
I was gonna say back there
you're very spontaneous.
Yes. Yes, exactly.
And also my hair.
My hair's also different.
Yes, and lighter.
I just made it darker, actually.
- There she is.
- Oh, hey, Vagsicles.
I am what I eat.
- He said as he quivered.
- Oh, god.
These guys are in
my improv troupe.
- Yeah, yeah.
- Guys, this is Dean.
- Hey.
- Dean the Dean
of the university
of first names.
Look at his face.
- Oh...
- You do have, like,
- a funny look, man, like...
- Funny in, like, a good way.
- Yeah.
- Yeah, it's good.
- It's, like, a hilarious face.
- It is.
- Thank you.
- Yeah, it would work good
- on stage, I think.
- Hmm.
Fine.
- Get out of here.
- We reserved this.
- We reserved it for an hour.
- Get out of here.
- Hey, there.
- Hi.
Hi. Are you okay?
Oh, yeah, I'm fine.
Are you talking about that?
- Uh, yeah.
- No, I just tripped.
- It's no big deal.
- No, don't underplay it.
You really ate it back there.
I saw the whole thing.
Well, thank you. I appreciate
you coming up to let me know.
- Mm-hmm.
- Thank you for...
Yeah, that was me.
No, I was feeling a little
too comfortable at the party,
and I saw you, so I figured,
"why don't I eat shit
in the kitchen?"
Oh, good save.
So how do you know Tony?
Uh, Tony?
The owner of the house.
Oh, uh, I saved his life
a while back
and then after that
we just kind of clicked.
Hmm.
- I'm Dean, by the way.
- Hi.
Hey.
Uh, Todd's outside, and
he's here with Jeremy.
- I got to go. Lovely meeting you.
- Oh, yeah, you, too.
Those guys are here,
so you should go.
Yeah.
- Hi.
- I'm poor. You're rich.
Where I'm falling, remember,
I saw your boobs?
We saw y...
We both saw your boobs.
- It was so good.
- I don't like you
saying that when there's other...
They didn't see my...
- This is a scene.
- We're doing scenes.
- We're doing improv.
- We're doing scenes.
Hey, you didn't have to leave.
Just...
Call me later, okay?
Bye.
- Hey.
- Hi.
- Hey.
- Hello.
You never told me your name.
Oh, well, it starts with an "n,"
and it ends with "icky."
Hmm. You're very cryptic,
like sudoku.
Yeah, I like to cultivate an
air of mystery around myself.
I do something
very similar with deodorant.
- Hmm.
- Not in a gross way.
I, you know, I don't need
to wear a lot of deodorant.
I don't, you know,
smell that bad or anything.
- Mmm.
- Good, nice, huh?
Which part of Brooklyn
are you from?
It's that obvious?
Yeah, you have a certain just-
off-the-subway quality to you.
Thank you.
You could just say immigrant.
It's cool.
That's not what I meant.
You don't look lobotomized like the
rest of the guys at this party.
Yeah, I saw a couple
walking head shots downstairs.
Um, so where'd you grow up?
- Nicky, we got to go.
- Oh, okay.
Uh, Dean, this is Jill.
Jill, Dean.
Jill, hey, my best friend
in high school was...
I'm sure it's a great story, but
we're late for a surprise party,
- so I'll just see you in the car?
- Okay.
- Okay.
- Well, you just told me, so...
Well, good luck
in L.A., Dean,
and watch out
for kitchen floors.
I will.
Hey, um, you want to, like,
trade emails or something?
I'm gonna be in town, I don't know,
just for a couple days, but...
- Why don't you just give me your number?
- Okay.
No, it's cool,
I got a pen and paper.
I'll just write it out,
20th century style.
Tiny, little pad.
Yeah, for just little drawings
or phone numbers.
It's, like, a mini pad...
- As opposed to a maxi pad.
- That was good, right?
- That was good.
Is this the way
back to my hotel?
I don't know. Is it?
So where are we?
This is my place.
- Oh.
- Look, I know you want to
come up and everything,
but you can't.
I'm sorry.
Oh, okay.
I'm sorry if I gave you
that impression.
Yeah, I have a boyfriend, so...
- Yeah, I know, the vampire.
- Shh.
Look, what you think
is gonna happen right now
is not gonna happen
right now unless...
You can keep a secret.
I'm not good at keeping secrets.
Ow.
That really hurt.
Don't pretend you didn't
fucking love that.
I'm not pretending.
Come here.
Look at me.
Oh, my god, not like that.
Don't look at me like that.
Okay, hey, Becca,
you're scaring me.
I know.
I'm scaring myself.
But you can't look at me
like that, okay?
You don't get to
look at me like that.
Okay, but you're
hurting my neck.
Oh, my god, it's part of it.
- Ow.
- You got to go, okay?
You just got to go.
Yeah, I should get back.
Yeah.
You need to leave.
- Oh. Can I get a ride?
- Get out of my car.
- No, you can't get a ride.
- Okay.
- Okay.
- After that you want a ride?
Okay, good seeing you.
- Good night.
- Carol?
- Hey.
Oh, hi.
I thought I was
in the wrong house.
Is it okay?
Has everyone left?
Uh, yeah, yeah, all gone.
Coast is clear.
How did we do?
Did any... we did okay?
Yeah, we do have
two very serious
- potential buyers.
- Wow.
Yeah, I think your home is gonna
sell a lot faster than I thought.
- Wow. Great.
- Yeah.
Well, it'll be thanks to you.
Where do you find
all this stuff?
It's, like, do you...
Do you and Patrick travel a lot?
- Patrick?
- Your husband.
No, um, he is not my husband.
- He's my colleague.
- Oh, I'm sorry.
- You thought, uh...
- I assume everyone's married.
- No. No, no, no, no, no.
- If they're together...
- Stupid. Sorry.
- Um, no.
No, it's...
No, it's fine.
Um, well, let's see
if we got any more,
uh, potential bidders.
Wait, wait, wait, what was that?
- That looked like you.
- Uh, you don't want to...
That's embarrassing.
- What is that?
- My charming sister
decided to create an online
dating profile for me,
and I spent, um,
much of yesterday
trying to take a usable photo
to throw myself
at strangers online.
I'm just curious.
"I like listening to jazz..."
oh, sophisticated.
"Taking long walks..."
Forests, one of
your interests is "forests"?
- I've... well, I like...
- You're interested in forests?
Well, I like nature and trees
and, like, being out in nature.
Oh, I see. Yeah, of course.
Well, sure.
- Does that sound weird?
- No, I-i just don't...
- Should I just have said trees?
- No, no, forests... I see.
I just did... you...
The wording.
You don't want to attract, like,
a lumberjack or a hermit or a...
A lumberjack
who's online dating?
I don't think I have
to worry about that.
If you said, "I like
taking long, shady walks,"
- that implies forests.
- That sounds threatening,
like I'm a mugger or something.
I think I'm gonna
sell your house
and leave the online dating
to someone else.
I'm sorry.
Let me see if we got you
any more offers or...
- Okay.
- Interests or calls.
Look, it was a free trip,
so I sat through one meeting.
Exactly, free day in L.A.
You've got me as your guide.
We're gonna do some cool shit.
I got some plans.
Cool.
Have you had smoothie king?
Huh?
- It's funny. It's always a king.
- What?
You know, smoothie king,
burger king, mattress king.
If you're selling something,
it has to be a king.
Smoothie Duke?
Nope.
Burger prime minister?
You can't do it.
What about dairy queen?
That works.
Yeah, okay, that's one.
Hold up.
I left my phone in the car.
- So?
- I want to get my phone.
Yeah, we're going in here for,
like, ten minutes.
Yeah, I want to get my phone.
I need it.
- Great, great, let's do that.
- Thank you.
Heads up.
Thanks, asshole.
Would it kill you to be present
for, like, 30 seconds?
Uh-huh.
Oh, there she is, coming back.
Oh, fuck.
Waiting for party girl to call?
No.
It's not gonna happen, man.
You screwed up.
- She'll call me.
- No, she won't.
Shithead.
You gave her your number
instead of getting her number,
so now she has all the power,
she gets to mess with your head
- instead of you messing with her.
- Yeah, right.
- Uh-huh.
- Right?
You're leaving tomorrow anyway,
so who gives a shit?
You leave tomorrow anyways,
so let's just put her aside.
You and me, tonight, we go out,
and I show you what
you've missed in Brooklyn.
What's that, bar, club?
- A club, yes.
I can't, man.
I got plans.
- Doing what?
- I'm supposed to be...
Hi.
Bye.
I like that shirt.
It's really brave.
Brave?
What does that mean?
Well, I mean, it's just not the
most flattering shirt on you,
but I think it's really cool
that you don't care
about that kind of thing.
It's awesome.
Yeah, it gives you
bigger hips, a little bit.
He's kidding. He's joking.
A joke.
- Shut up.
Wow.
Yeah. Okay.
- Hey.
- Hi.
- How are you?
- Really good.
- Cool.
- Yeah.
Your hair looks a little weird.
Excuse me?
- Excuse me?
- My...
Has anybody ever told you that
you look very attracted to me?
No, not yet.
Well, they have now.
Just did.
- Yeah, you did.
- Cheers.
- Oh, cheers, yeah.
- Cheers.
What are you guys
doing after this?
Um, I don't think...
I don't know.
- After party at our place?
- Who are you doing after this?
- Who are you doing after this?
- What?
Nothing.
Listen, I just want
to apologize again for...
What?
- You know, the ladies.
- Oh, shut up. You're fine.
You're in a funk right now.
I get it, you know?
- I've been there. I can spot it.
- Yeah.
And, honestly, I think
you're over-thinking it.
You just got to do
something spontaneous.
Be a spontaneous person.
Get out of it.
Okay, you know what?
Let me make it up to you.
Why don't I take you out?
- Okay?
- Okay.
Where do you want to go?
You know what we could do?
We could drive
to Vegas right now.
Okay.
- Yeah? You want to do this?
- Yeah. Yeah.
- You're into going to Vegas?
- Totally.
'Cause I'm down.
I'm not saying it like,
"hey, let's just talk about it."
I'm saying let's go and do it.
- We're going to Vegas.
- We're going to Vegas.
- We'll get there.
- Okay.
- I'll show you the ropes.
- All right.
- I'm gonna lay it out there. You'll see what's going on.
- All right.
- You know Vegas?
- Of course I know Vegas.
It's the best.
I love it.
It's just such a hassle.
I mean, it's
four-and-a-half hours away.
Yeah. Want to
get some sleep?
Yeah.
Hey, man, it was
great seeing you.
- Cheers, buddy.
- Cheers.
You going home or on a trip?
- I'm going home.
- Oh, me too, thank god.
- You live in the city?
- Brooklyn.
Oh, good.
I'm on Dekalb and Washington.
I love it.
- Yeah, I'm ready to get back.
- I really love it, though.
New York's the best, period.
No contest.
Even queens.
Yeah, I think I've seen enough
of L.A. to last me for...
Oh...
I'm never going back
to L.A. again.
No, no, no, I can't.
For my health, I can't.
Okay. I'm gonna try
to take a nap.
- I'm pretty tired.
- Oh, yeah.
Naomi.
I'm Naomi, by the way.
Before you, you know.
Good to meet you, Naomi.
Take a nap.
- Your name would be?
- I'm Dean.
Dean.
Put her there.
Yeah.
- Sleep tight.
- Thanks.
I should be sleeping.
I'm exhausted.
I'm so wired from the anxiety,
from the trauma of Los Angeles
that I can't sleep.
I'm not myself.
So what do you do...
For work?
I'm a...
- Speech therapist.
- Oh.
Yeah.
I work with animals.
Mmm. Communication.
How to listen,
how to communicate,
- reading signals.
- Yeah.
- 'Cause they can speak.
- They can communicate.
It's been proven
time and time again.
They are communicating,
but we're so blocked.
Animals, no subtlety.
- It's crass.
- You texting?
- I am.
- Excuse me, excuse me.
- Yeah.
Get in these last moments
while you can
- before she comes around...
and gets ya.
- Sir?
- Yeah.
You have to turn that off.
- Sir?
- Um...
I'm a scientist.
- Hi.
- Hey.
You are a little late, mister.
- Yeah.
- And you brought a suitcase.
Yeah, actually, I was on
my plane and I got your text.
You just, you know,
hopped off the plane
and ran straight over here?
I usually have
that effect on people.
Yeah, yeah.
No, I'm kidding.
Really,
what's with the suitcase?
No, I was staying with
my friend Eric, and...
I'm gonna stay with Eric.
I was staying at a hotel
and going from my hotel
to my friend Eric's place,
and he's still at work,
so I ended up with all my stuff.
- I'm kind of stranded.
- Oh.
Uh, volleyball gear, you know.
So, uh, is this yours?
- Yeah.
- Cool.
Are you fishing
for a ride right now?
Oh, I'm not fishing,
but now that you mention it,
- that would work for me.
- Okay.
- Cool. Great.
- Okay.
- Sure.
- Awesome.
- Um, you gonna drive?
- No, I'm not gonna drive.
- Okay.
- I was just, you know, being polite.
Thanks.
You want the story for real?
Yeah, I'm curious.
All right, I was in college.
I came up with
this natural beauty product,
and I ended up dropping out
'cause I was tinkering with it.
First, I started
giving it to my friends.
Then I started selling it,
and then this
big cosmetics brand
actually bought it,
um, but that was
a couple of years ago,
- so nothing really since.
- Wow.
- Really?
- Mm-hmm.
Wow.
- So you have, like, a patent and everything?
- Yeah.
So you're an inventor?
I think of myself more of,
like, a chef
'cause I came up with, you know,
a few recipes
that actually worked.
- That's amazing.
Seriously. You know,
when I'm drawing,
sometimes I'll come up with,
like, an invention or something
and I'll just do a sketch.
- Really? Like what?
- But nothing like that.
Um, let's see.
- So you're on a plane, right?
- Mm-hmm.
This happens a lot.
Plane's packed.
There's a baby that's
crying super loud.
It's bothering everybody.
How do you get that baby quiet?
Baby silencer.
All right, it's a funnel.
You put it over the baby's
nose and mouth
with a tube, like,
a little kind of tube,
and it goes to headphones
that go to the baby's own ears,
so when the baby's crying
just like,
"wah, wah!" Really loud,
it's contained into the tubes,
and then just like,
"ow, ow, that hurts.
Hello? Wah.
Uh, who is that?
That's me.
I should stop."
Baby silenced.
So what you have is something
that will silence the baby
and also teach the baby
about self-awareness
and cause and effect, so...
You know, I would make sure
that there's adequate
breathing apparatus
and, you know,
holes in it and stuff,
so I'm not gonna do
anything crazy to the baby.
Do you think that that would
actually work for adults
with helping them
develop self-awareness?
Perhaps you could
send the sound of them
pitching an invention
straight into their own ears?
Like in a restaurant
or something?
- Yeah.
- Thank you for dinner.
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
No, it was my pleasure.
- That was fun.
- Yeah.
- I had a good time.
- Me, too.
- And thanks for the ride.
- You're welcome.
Um, okay, so just to be clear.
Mm-hmm?
- Okay.
- Okay.
- I'll get my stuff. All right.
- Okay.
Whoa, okay.
- Hello.
- All right.
There he is.
So this is it.
Um, that's the couch.
That's gonna be, uh...
- All yours.
- Wow.
Assuming that's okay with Tobes.
Totally, no problem.
- Heard you're here stalking some girl.
- What?
Yeah, my friend
stalked a girl once.
She lived in China,
so I'm not sure if it
counted as stalking per se
'cause he was in San Diego.
I contended that
it was more like
keeping tabs on her
from that distance.
- Yeah, I'm not stalking anybody.
- That's exactly what he said.
- Yeah, but I'm not.
- Agree to disagree.
Damn it.
- What did you tell him?
- What? Don't worry about Toby.
He's his own thing, man.
So tell me about this girl.
Oh, well, she drove me back
from the... whoa!
- What the hell is this?
- What?
I have a cat.
You know that.
No, I did not know that.
I do now, though.
And I'll never forget it.
Yeah, I share my room
with Nicholas.
- He loves this shit.
Anyways, the girl,
what's going on?
Uh, yeah, so we, uh...
I'm sorry, I...
- When did you get into cats?
- All right, come on, enough.
- All right.
- I have a cat. Let's move on.
Okay, okay.
Yeah, it went
really well, and, uh,
we're gonna get
together on Tuesday.
- That's great. Day or night?
- Day.
- Day? That's not good.
- Yeah.
- Night. Night.
- What?
You want night time, late.
Her defenses are down.
She's kind of tired.
Okay, I don't want to kill her.
I want to date her.
Date her?
Let's slow down, 1955, okay?
Let's just try
to sleep with her first.
Yeah, I mean, that, too.
That's what I meant.
Here, bud.
- You okay, man?
- Yeah.
- Like, things are okay?
- Yeah, things are great.
Okay.
Do a little bunny hop.
Ahh!
- You all right?
- Yeah, I'm good. I'm good.
I'll be honest,
I didn't mean to fall,
but I did mean
to take the risk, okay?
- And that's how you ride.
- You're the man.
- I feel amazing.
- Race?
Yeah, let's go.
- Hey, dad.
- Oh, you're there.
- Are you back?
- No, I'm still in L.A.
I decided to stay a bit longer.
- What are you doing out there?
- Just working on my tan.
I was gonna maybe get
my chest waxed.
You are?
No, I'm just
catching up with Eric
and just trying to take a little
break, since I'm out here.
A break from what?
You know,
just everything at home.
Things are kind of heavy.
I just want to get
a little breather.
I see.
No, it's a good idea.
- Why don't you go on to Hawaii?
- Okay, I'm not on vacation.
I'm still working on my book.
You know, I can do that
from here, too.
I need to talk to you
about the house.
Okay, okay, right, yeah.
Let's talk about the house.
We had an open house and...
Whoa, wait, wait.
We were gonna make the decision
- about the house together.
- Yeah, we did. I did.
And I...
Since you decided to run away.
Okay, I didn't run away.
I came out to meet
those ad people.
Can we just not do anything
with the house until I get back?
Okay?
Okay.
Well, you know,
you had a really good realtor.
- Yes, well done.
- To full asking price.
Oh, full asking price, yes.
Now how do I break
the news to my son?
Mmm.
Well, we could ask for some
extra time before closing.
People are understanding
about that.
He's just been at loose ends,
kind of, you know,
missing in action for a while.
Now he's in L.A.
I don't know what he's doing.
I keep thinking he's gonna
come home with a Mohawk
and face piercings.
People still get Mohawks?
Oh, if Dean thought it would
help him not get a job,
he'd get two Mohawks.
How do you...
How do you get two Mohawks?
I...
You put two Mohawks
together, and you...
I don't know.
It'd be sort of an "X,"
look like a heliport.
Maybe he's just trying
to figure himself out.
Yeah, he's been
trying for a while.
I'm sorry, I shouldn't
be talking about this.
- I don't want to cross any lines.
- Don't be silly.
You've already
crossed those lines,
and that's okay.
Okay.
Mmm, why don't I look
for some listings,
and we'll maybe look at
some places later this week?
- All right, sounds good.
- Yeah?
- It's a date.
- Hi.
- Hey.
- Hi.
- How are you?
- It's good to see you. Hey.
- Hi, you, too.
Um, you remember my friend Jill
from the party the other night?
- Yeah, hey, Jill.
- Hey.
Hey. Okay.
- She wanted to see the show too, so...
- Cool.
- So...
- You were wearing that same outfit
- the last time I saw you.
- Yes, I was.
Thank you for pointing
that out, I appreciate that.
We need to find a restroom,
like, right now.
Oh, yeah, uh, number one only.
- Hey.
- Hi.
- So I'm gonna go.
- Okay, bye.
- Yeah, I got to go.
- Really?
That's the game
you're gonna play?
- Oh, I'm not playing a game.
- Oh, aren't you?
- I can stay for a few.
- Thanks.
- So, okay, the artist...
- Nicky, come look at this.
- Oh, okay.
- Yeah.
Oh, yeah, hey, uh...
Just a sec.
Yeah, I can be there in,
like, ten minutes.
Yeah, totally.
Weird reception out here.
Yeah, in your face so hard.
I was just doing a bit.
Are you gonna stay,
or are you gonna go?
Um, I'll stay.
- Phew, what a relief.
- Yeah.
Uh, so Jill's, like,
your best friend?
- Is that the deal?
- Mm-hmm, yeah.
And you guys just
do everything together?
A lot of stuff.
You show up everywhere with her?
That's normal?
Do you have a best friend?
Um, kind of.
Former, I'd say.
- He ditched you?
- He got married.
But... we weren't romantic.
It's not like that.
- No, I get it.
- Yeah.
But you're a little sad
about it.
- Mmm, no, I think I'm...
- Nicky...
Look at this one.
Isn't his work powerful?
I want to put it above my bed.
Dean?
Hey.
Is that that guy
from that vampire show?
- That's Dean, huh?
- Yeah.
- Hey, Becca.
- Hi.
I thought you went
back to New York.
I extended my trip a little bit.
- Why don't you just get back to New York now?
- Yeah.
- I'm pretty sure she doesn't want to see you ever again.
- I don't.
Just so you know...
- We're done.
- Done.
- Me and you?
- Mm-hmm.
- Okay, yeah, I'm pretty sure we never started.
- Oh, my god.
All right, well, let's make
things real simple here, okay?
Why don't you just end
whatever you had going on
and just agree to
never talk to her again?
- Okay.
- Don't say another word to her
starting now.
- Okay.
- Ah! Not one more word.
- He got it.
- I'm sorry.
What was that?
- I just heard something.
- Let's go.
- Okay, okay, okay.
- You want it on the other side of the face?
- Oh, my god.
- You're in an art gallery right now.
- No, come on, you...
- I think he's really sorry
and he's not gonna say
another word.
- Hey, look at me. Come here.
- What?
- I'm sorry. I'm good, yeah?
- Look at me.
Oh, my god,
I'm... oh, yeah, yeah.
- Yeah.
- Uh-huh.
- Are you okay?
- I am, thank you.
Thanks.
I appreciate that.
That fake vampire, he's just
lucky I didn't lose my shit.
- Oh.
- Could kill a man, you know?
I took Kendo
in high school, so...
Is that...
Does that require sticks?
Not the way I do it.
By the way, Becca...
I mean...
There's nothing there.
- I don't know what she's... - oh, you
don't have to explain anything to me.
- I...
- No, I know, I know.
I know, I just... I figured
I'd just let you know.
You know, it's not like we're...
- Yeah, I mean, we're just...
- Yeah, we're hanging out.
- It's fine, yeah.
- I mean, you're visiting.
- Yeah, yeah.
- And I'm going out of town this weekend...
- Yeah. - ...So it's not
even like I'm around.
- You going out of town?
- Yeah.
Jill and I are gonna
drive up to San Francisco.
Cool.
That's nice, yeah.
It's funny, my friend Eric
and I were actually
gonna head out of town
this weekend.
He was gonna show me
the bay area.
- Really?
- Yeah, some of the sights.
- Oh.
- Mm-hmm.
Well, I mean, I guess
the four of us could...
- Yeah.
- Go together.
- Yeah.
- If that's not too weird.
No, no, I think that's cool
if it's cool with you guys.
- Yeah.
- You know, it was gonna be a guys' trip,
but, um, I'll check with him.
- Hey.
- Hey, Jill, this is Eric,
- Dean's friend.
- Hey.
Uh, well, actually,
Dean's my friend.
I'm kind of, like,
the main dude, I guess.
Right, we got it.
Oh, yeah?
Well, okay, cool.
Are you guys doing good?
Jill, you okay?
Excuse me?
I just, you know, I didn't know.
It seems like you're kind of,
like, upset or maybe,
like, stressed out
about something, you know?
No.
Oh, oh, are you, like,
one of those, like,
pickup artist dudes?
Like, you're gonna,
like, take me down a peg,
and then say something like,
"oh, that's so cool how you're
comfortable being fat,"
or something, and then
I'll feel bad about myself
and sleep with you,
or something stupid?
- Uh...
- No, he's...
He's on the spectrum, actually.
He's got Asperger's
and he's not that great
at reading other people, so...
Asper... do I?
He can't even read
himself, actually.
It's okay, man.
Sorry.
No, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I didn't mean to just
attack you like that.
I'm just... I'm really
sick of guys trying to
insecurize me into sleeping
with them, so I just...
- Yeah.
- I hear you.
Yeah. Cool.
Remember to make
eye contact if you can.
- Thanks.
- Sure.
All right.
- So this is nature.
- Mm-hmm.
All right, so let's talk
about our game plan.
All right. Um, I think
we're gonna go on a hike.
- So what does that entail?
Um, walking along this trail?
Ah, yeah, now I can feel it.
Hey, Toby. What?
Well, what happened?
Oh, Jesus.
God.
Toby knocked a bookshelf
on top of Nicholas,
and he's in critical condition.
- Oh, my god.
- Who's Nicholas?
- It's his cat.
- He's not just a cat, okay?
- Okay.
- You know he's not just a cat.
- All right.
- Look, I'm sorry.
I have to go to the airport
right now, okay?
- I'm sorry.
- Eric?
- No, just stay with him, okay?
- Hey.
- I'm on my way.
Guys,
I got to go now. I'm sorry.
All right, all right, all right.
Hey, you've reached Dean.
- I can't come to my phone right now.
- Thank you.
But here's my best
robot impression:
- - Hi, it's your dad.
Um, please call me.
It's important.
I have some news.
- Whoa, whoa, hold on, hold on.
- What? What?
Just take a breath.
- He's gonna be okay.
It's okay.
He's gonna be fine.
I don't know what
I'm gonna do if he dies, okay?
- He's not gonna die.
- Okay.
All right?
Cats are resilient.
Yeah, you're right.
You're right.
Especially Nicholas.
He's got such a strong spirit.
Yeah, yeah, I got that from him.
Yeah.
What about you?
Um, you know,
I haven't gotten to know
- Nicholas that well, but, yeah.
- No, no, I mean you and her.
Nicky?
Yeah. Yeah, I'm good.
All right, just be slow
and be cool, okay?
Yeah.
- All right?
- Yeah, I'll be cool.
- All right, come here.
- All right.
Take care of yourself, man.
Sorry that you
can't crash with us.
Jill's mom is really weird
about having guys over.
No, it's fine, I wouldn't
want me over there anyway.
Oh, yeah?
Why's that?
I'm a bed-wetter.
- Really?
- Yeah. I don't pee in the bed.
It's more into it
from a short distance,
but it's kind of the same thing.
- You're such a dork.
- I thought that was funny.
It was okay.
Thank you, Jill.
Thank you for that.
Drive safely.
I'll be thinking of you
as I pee into my bed tonight.
Ladies.
Hello, you have reached Robert.
Sorry I missed your call.
Please leave a message,
and I'll do my best
to return it as soon as I can.
Yes?
- Hey.
- Hi.
- What are you doing here?
- Well...
I was on my way to Jill's
and I realized
- that I forgot something.
- You forgot something?
Sorry,
I'm not very good at improv.
No, it was really sexy.
- Come on in.
- Okay.
Oh, look at this
disgusting place.
Pretty gross, huh?
What about that play?
What'd you think?
It was so great.
- Wasn't it?
- Thank you.
Yeah, it was...
It was, uh...
- Very complex and interesting.
- The performances were amazing.
- Great performances.
- Wow.
Yup, yup.
Good production.
- Worth that money.
Yeah.
Okay, I have
a confession to make.
I didn't understand most of
what we saw in that theater.
- I'm sorry.
- Oh.
I looked over at you,
and you looked like
- you were utterly engrossed.
- I know, I'm sorry.
- I just... I didn't get it. I...
- Well...
I didn't understand a thing.
- Really?
- Not a thing.
What? Were they...
- What was that?
- Was it about time travel?
No, that... those, I
think, were flashbacks.
That was her as a younger woman.
- That was the same?
- Yes, that was the same woman.
Ah, that doesn't help.
It was fun.
I'm glad we went.
It was an incredible
production of just a...
- Of a crazy...
- Terrible, terrible play.
- Crazy-ass play, yeah.
- Mm-hmm.
Well...
Well, good night.
Would you like to
come up for a coffee?
Yes. I'd love to.
Oh, man.
Okay, you're not allowed
to judge my apartment.
I didn't know
you were coming in,
and there's papers
all over the table, so...
Sure.
I-I'm sorry. I, um...
I'm sort of stuck here.
I don't think I can...
I shouldn't have, uh,
made the first move.
I think I was too forward.
No, no, no, no, no.
I, uh, I don't know what it is,
but it's...
I really like you.
No, and...
But?
But...
Well, truth is...
I don't quite know who I am.
You know, since...
Since my...
My wife, uh...
- Oh.
- Do you understand?
- I mean...
- It's okay.
It seemed like such a good idea.
- Of course.
- Um...
- I get it.
- Um...
That is just my luck, man.
I finally meet a guy
I really like
and turns out he's married.
I guess that's it, yeah.
Good night, Robert.
Nicky?
- Hmm?
- You awake?
Mm-hmm.
Oh, okay.
Hey.
I was just realizing
that I, um...
I forgot to mention
something to you...
That I probably
should have told you.
What?
Um...
I was engaged.
Yeah, not anymore.
We broke up
a few months ago, but...
I realized I never said
anything to you about it,
so I figured I should
tell you, you know?
My mom was sick,
and I guess I wanted her
to know that I found my person.
So I think if my mom
hadn't gotten sick,
then Michelle and I
probably wouldn't have
even gotten engaged.
We probably would have
broken up a while ago,
but I thought
I should just tell you.
Is your mom okay now?
Uh...
No.
No, she's not, but...
- I'm so sorry.
- Oh, no, no, it's...
I'm fine, thanks.
I appreciate it.
Yeah, I haven't really
wanted to talk about it
so much since she died,
but I don't know.
I feel like I can talk to you.
It's funny, I didn't even want
to come out to California,
and then I met you,
and now I feel like it
kind of makes sense,
like, why I ended up out
here in the first place.
I'm glad I met you.
You know, while we're talking,
I probably should
tell you one other thing.
I'm pretty sure I'm falling
in love with you.
What?
I said... I mean...
- I think you're great.
- Uh...
Okay, well-well,
thank you.
- That's...
- Sure.
That's a really...
that's a really
lovely thing to say.
- Good night.
- Good night.
Okay, you ready?
- Yeah.
- Good.
How do I look?
Um, you look a little stiff.
It's okay,
just take a deep breath.
- Yeah, thanks.
- Take a deep breath, okay?
Okay, well, my mom's
gonna be really excited.
Yeah.
My dad says she's having
a good day today.
- I thought I heard voices.
- Hello.
- Hey.
- Hi. You need a haircut.
Oh, Michelle brought
your favorite flowers.
And she's got something
on her finger.
- Yup. All right, let's...
- Hi.
- Hello.
Happy birthday.
How are you?
Sir? You have a note.
Thanks.
Dear Dean,
I didn't want to wake you
up this morning,
so I thought I'd leave you
a note, 20th century style.
I realized I haven't been
completely honest
with you, either.
Last night
when we were talking in bed
there was something
I should have told you.
The truth is, I'm married.
It looks weird even writing it
because we're separated
and have been for some time,
but it's still something
we're trying to figure out.
The night that I met you,
my husband Jeremy
actually came to that party.
Uh, Todd's outside,
and he's here with Jeremy.
I'm sorry. I got to go.
It was lovely meeting you.
Yeah, those guys are here,
so you should go.
I enjoyed hanging out with you
and didn't think
much beyond that,
and then things just happened.
Along the way Jill kept telling
me I should talk to you.
She felt like
I was leading you on,
but I couldn't find
the right moment to bring it up.
For what it's worth,
I thought we were
just having fun.
I guess I was trying to run away
from all the heaviness
in my life.
I hope that makes sense.
I just have a lot
I still need to deal with.
Maybe we both do.
I hope you find
what you're looking for.
Let me know when you do.
Maybe we'll be on
the same road by then.
Either way,
I'm still glad I met you.
Take care of yourself, Nicky.
I just don't know
what you're doing.
What am I supposed to be doing?
I just took a trip,
and now I'm here.
Even when you're here,
you're not here.
Wherever you are,
I need you to come back.
Okay, um, to where?
Should I come home maybe?
Oh, I forgot.
You sold our house.
You sold mom's house while
I was away, so that's gone.
Oh, I see.
I get it.
I see the problem.
What exactly
did you want me to do?
Just go on living there alone?
No, I don't know
what I want you to do.
I just... I want to stop
living under this cloud.
I want to stop talking
about life and death
and how I'm not grieving right.
We're not helping each other,
so why don't we just stop?
Okay.
No, I think that
sounds very healthy.
I'm glad we had this talk.
Listen, I wanted to apologize
for my performance
at your wedding.
Oh, dude, stop.
No, I feel like I was a little
out of control there,
and seeing Michelle
kind of threw me,
and I don't know.
I'm sorry.
- Thanks.
- Don't worry about it.
- Hey, how's your dad doing?
- He's okay, I guess.
We don't talk much
these days, but,
you know,
he's got his therapist,
so I guess he's fine.
Yeah, I remember
after my dad died.
My whole family practically,
you know, disintegrated,
and I was just...
I think a year after
was somehow harder
than right after.
Yeah, definitely.
You know, people...
They don't think about it
when they see you,
don't ask how you're doing
or think that you might
actually feel worse now
than you did then.
You realize the world
just keeps on going.
It doesn't really care.
What about now?
I don't know.
I mean, it was so long ago now.
Sometimes I'll fantasize
about it, you know?
What would it be like
if he hadn't died?
We're never gonna
not miss them, you know?
First big thing in your life that
you're never gonna get over.
- It sucks.
- It sucks.
Yeah.
Look, man,
whatever's going on
with you and your dad,
just remember to go easy
on each other, okay?
You hungry?
- Not really.
- Yeah, me neither.
- Want to eat?
- Yeah.
Okay, let's go.
Next saved message.
Hey, honey, mom here.
I just got your message,
and I...
I just want to say don't worry.
Take a deep breath.
I know you can do it.
Oh, and don't forget to eat.
Okay, love you.
So have you met your neighbors?
No, not officially,
but, uh, a lot of
their dogs have,
uh, become acquainted
with my crotch.
I always liked that picture
of you and mom.
Yeah, me, too.
Nice view.
Yeah, yeah.
And if you put your cheek
against the window,
you can see central park.
Yeah, that's nice.
Yeah, leaves will be
changing soon.
Uh, dad,
I wanted to talk to you.
About the house?
No.
You were right.
I... I disappeared
there for a while.
It's okay.
You don't need to apologize.
No, I do.
I was running and I'm sorry.
I just...
You know, I think
about mom every day.
I'll pass that bookstore
where we used to meet up,
or smell her perfume, or just...
It's just...
She's everywhere, you know?
No matter what I do,
I just keep thinking
about her every day.
Even when I try not to.
So many things remind me
of her, and, uh...
Dad, I can't even imagine
what you've been going through.
- I'm sorry.
- It's okay.
- It's okay. I know. I know.
- It's okay.
- I'm sorry.
No. No, no.
Sit down.
I'm worried about you.
I know you are,
but don't worry about me.
I'm gonna be fine.
I'm not sure when,
but I'm sure I'm gonna be fine.
- Yeah.
- I miss your mom...
A lot.
That's not gonna stop,
but I can't tell you
how lucky I feel
that I got to be with her
as long as I did.
- Yeah.
- And how lucky I feel that we had you.
It's good to have you back.
Don't you disappear on me, okay?
I won't.
You, too.
- Oh, I'm not gonna disappear.
- Okay.
You know where to find me.
- I'm here. It's a deal.
- Okay.
And, um...
Let me share something with you.
Dear Eric,
I'm so sorry for your loss.
I know Nicholas
was more than a cat,
he was a good friend
and he offered you
great support.
Losing him probably feels like
losing a part of yourself.
I've been there.
In the coming months,
you might feel
more lost than you do now
and you might feel like
you need to run away
from all the heaviness
for a while.
Maybe you'll fly across
the country to escape the pain,
and maybe while you're away
your dad will go and sell
all of your cat furniture,
the last real link you thought
you had to Nicholas.
It might be hard
to understand now,
but maybe your dad did it
because he just needed
to do it to move forward.
I wish there was something
I could say
that would make you feel better,
but the hard truth
is that Nicholas is gone,
and there's nothing
that will bring him back.
Not old cat furniture,
personal belongings,
or even voice messages from him
that you've carefully saved.
Nothing can replace him,
but that doesn't mean
you won't be okay again.
You know, when you lose someone,
it can make you feel so alone...
But there's one thing
I've learned...
If you really love them,
you never lose them.
Especially if they had
a strong spirit.
Anyway, here's a copy
of my new book.
I can't say
it holds any answers,
but maybe it'll give you a laugh
and that's worth something.
Take care of yourself, buddy.
Your friend, Dean.