Demon Pit (2022) Movie Script
1
(intense dramatic music)
(gravel crunching)
(suspenseful dramatic music)
(lighter flicking)
(suspenseful dramatic
music continues)
(hands thudding)
(upbeat rock music)
(suspenseful dramatic music)
(upbeat rock music)
(gunshot firing)
(rapid gunshots firing)
(male speaks in a
foreign language)
(group chattering in
a foreign language)
(rapid gunshots firing)
(suspenseful dramatic music)
- You guys cover the back.
(upbeat rock music)
(gunshot blasting)
(upbeat rock music continues)
(rapid gunshots firing)
(gun clatters)
(rapid gunshots firing)
(gun cocks)
- Shit!
(gunshot blasting)
(gun magazine clanks)
(gun clatters)
(male yells indistinctly)
(gunshot blasting)
(assailant yells)
(sword clanks)
(gunshot blasting)
(pounding on door)
- [Franklin] G!
(pounding on door continues)
G, we're waitin' on you!
(G pants heavily)
(door lock clatters)
- [G] What's up?
- [Franklin] You all right?
- Yeah, I'm alright.
- [Franklin] We got one.
- All right, give me a minute.
(door creaking)
(door thuds shut)
(upbeat rock music)
Let's go.
(upbeat rock music continues)
(dramatic instrumental music)
(motorcycle engines rumbling)
- Whoo!
- Dee's Money Pit.
- What an appropriate name
for a titi bar out in
the middle of nowhere.
- Who would build a strip
club all the way out here?
- I don't know,
but I kinda wanna find out.
(lighter flicking)
- You're kidding me, man!
I don't even wanna know what
a daytime stripper looks like,
especially in a
shit hole like this.
- (laughs) There's cars.
- Yeah, so?
- Only the finest
desert skank works here.
Come on, let's
get our dicks wet.
- Hey, what the hell!
(engines rumbling)
(motorcycle engines
continue rumbling)
(Richard groans)
(Wes exhales loudly)
- [Wes] Wow!
(bodies thudding)
- Pardon me, sir?
I don't mean to
bother you gentlemen.
- You watch yourself, old man.
- I ain't lookin'
for money or a drink!
I was just hopin'
that maybe you could
spare me something to eat.
(Wes laughs)
- Let me tell
you somethin', old man.
If I wanna spend my money,
I'm gonna spend it on
tits and ass right there.
So get outta here!
(Charlie thuds)
(Wes laughs)
- What?
(both laughing)
(Wes continues laughing)
(upbeat rock music)
- Look at this place.
It's crazy.
Hey, baby, where are you goin'?
- Seriously, get
off me, asshole.
- Oh, excuse me, Miss Attitude.
- Cockle-doodle-doo!
(Wes laughs and claps hands)
Whoo!
(Wes continues laughing
and clapping hands)
(indistinct chattering)
(intense whooshing)
- Howdy.
- Howdy.
- Can I get you fellas a drink?
- [Wes] Yeah, a whiskey.
- [Richard] Make that two.
- [Dee] Comin' up.
(upbeat rock music)
(indistinct chattering)
- [Richard] Most the
people of this town
got a staring
problem or somethin'?
- Oh, you gotta forgive 'em.
You know, they just
get a little excited
when they see a new vic,
new strangers come into town.
That's all.
- [Richard] And why is that?
- [Dee] Oh, just...
Just is.
That's all.
- Well, maybe they don't
see the patch on my back?
- Satan's few.
- Look at you, fine
ass lookin' thing.
I almost forgot why
we came in here.
- [Richard] How come all
you girls have your top on?
I wanna see some tit.
- It's not that
kind of place, sir.
- [Dee] I don't
think you're gonna
wanna pay the price. (laughs)
- Hey, do you have a
VIP room in this place?
- Some would say, this entire
place is one giant VIP.
- [Wes] Well, how much is it?
(upbeat rock music)
(indistinct chattering)
- It's $100 for 15 minutes.
- $100?
And what does that get us?
- You get a lap
dance for 15 minutes.
- Oh, come on!
A strip club in the
middle of nowhere?
You expect me to believe
that there's no tug of
war in the back rooms?
- This really isn't the
place you think it is.
- Broads with daddy issues,
Watered down drinks,
no, I believe I know
exactly where I am,
and what you are.
- What am I?
Enlighten me.
- You're just some
fucked up bitch
that ain't shit
without that fake rack,
and that real fine ass.
(hand smacking)
(deep growling)
(intense whooshing)
(eerie suspenseful music)
(blood squelching)
(Wes groans)
(Wes gagging)
- Wes, stop actin'
like a pussy, man.
She didn't hit you
that hard. (laughs)
Fuckin' cunt.
(Wes gagging)
Holy shit!
What are you guys?
- Come on, Richard!
Don't you recognize
Satan's kind?
- Your demons or some shit!
- Your friend might
have been right
about the daddy issues.
- Look, he was
outta fuckin' line,
but you didn't have
to fuckin' kill him.
- [Sekhmet] Oh,
he's not dead, yet.
- Look, I'll walk out that door,
and I promise, I swear, I
won't tell nobody nothin'!
- That's funny.
That's exactly
what Mr. Tran said.
- Who?
- Oh, that's the
nice store owner
you and your little
buddy here robbed.
He begged and pleaded he
wouldn't say anything,
and you killed him anyway.
- How the fuck
did you know that?
- Because it weighs
heavy on your soul.
- Fuck you, demons!
You're going to-
(blow thuds)
(Richard yells)
(skin squelching)
(intense dramatic music)
(Richard gagging)
(blood dripping)
(police siren chirping)
(car door slams shut)
(intense dramatic
music continues)
(glass clattering)
- Holy shit!
What kinda damn crime do
we have going on here?
(exhales loudly) Never
waste a good scotch.
(Dee chuckles)
- Hallelujah!
- Kanpai.
- You know, the vehicles are
startin' to pile up out front.
I can get Dale Tucker,
and he'll do a sweep
with the tow truck.
- Okay.
- And these guys have got
some nice motorcycles.
I don't wanna scrap those.
- Well, you know, just
have a go at what you like.
You know, you've
done so much for us.
- Kosher?
- As kosher as a brit milah.
(all laughing)
I don't think these
boys will be ridin'
anytime soon again, anyway.
- No. (chuckles)
- Like some more?
- Yes, please.
(Dee chuckles)
Double!
- You need it.
- [G] So is this kid
really possessed,
or is this another disciplinary
issue or somethin'?
- She's probably
just a little brat.
(gravel crunching)
(knocking on door)
(door creaks open)
(Maria speaks in a
foreign language)
(Father Dupre speaks
in a foreign language)
(Maria speaks in a
foreign language)
(Father Dupre speaks
in a foreign language)
(Maria speaks in a
foreign language)
- She said, "Her baby's
possessed by the devil".
(Maria breathes unsteadily)
(Father Dupre speaks
in a foreign language)
Okay.
(Father Dupre speaks
in a foreign language)
(door creaks open)
(suspenseful dramatic music)
- Isabel?
Mi amor?
Mi beb?
Hi, baby.
Isabel?
(Maria breathes shakily)
- Isabel?
Sweetheart, I heard you're
not feelin' so well.
(suspenseful dramatic music)
(Isabel screams in
a disembodies voice)
(disembodied voice
continues screaming)
- [Stewart] What the
fuckin' fuck was that?
- Yeah, that
definitely is a demon.
- Yeah, no shit!
- Yeah.
- And if it is
what I think it is,
it's a very, very,
very old creature.
Maria, have you guys
changed the land recently,
dug a well, anything like that?
(Father Dupre speaks
in a foreign language)
(Maria speaks in a
foreign language)
- [Roshan] What'd she say,
what'd she say, what'd she say?
- They dug up a
Joshua tree last week,
and Isabella helped them.
- [Roshan] How big was the tree?
(Maria gently sobbing)
(Father Dupre speaks
in a foreign language)
(Maria continues sobbing)
- [Stewart] Oh, it
definitely sounds bad.
- Okay, look, the original
people of the land
must have buried it
underneath that tree.
When they ripped the tree out,
they released it.
- But released what?
- It's a pestilence demon.
They're the embodiment
of sickness and disease.
It can level a
village in a week,
an entire civilization
in a month.
Everything around it dies.
(stammers) But I've never seen
anything like this before.
That must be like the granddaddy
of all pestilence demons.
- All right, what do we do?
- Well, it can't be
destroyed, only contained.
- What does that mean?
- Can we talk
about this outside?
- Yeah, let's get outside.
Come on!
(Father Dupre speaks
in a foreign language)
(Maria sobbing)
- The little girls is gonna
die painfully and inevitably,
and when she does,
that demon's gonna leap
into the next host,
the nearest host,
and will slowly kill
everything around it.
Everything and everyone!
- You're not telling
us how to stop it.
- We can't.
- Oh.
- We need to bury it where
no one will ever find it.
- You're saying that we need
to bury that little girl alive?
- [Roshan] Yeah.
- There's gotta
be somethin' else.
- That thing will
sweep this entire area
and kill everything.
Would you rather have that, huh?
- I know!
Trust me.
But we haven't even tried
to think of anything else.
- Since humanity has existed,
we've been dealing
with demons like that.
But he's right!
I mean, there must be somethin'!
We haven't tried anything else!
- The Bible is full
of sacrificial lambs.
Father, you know that!
Besides, I'm sure that girl
doesn't wanna be
the bearer of death
and destruction to everyone
she knows and loves.
- We-
(bag rustling)
We are running out of
places to bury these things.
We need to educate the
masses and reveal the truth.
- Yeah, if you're
into helter skelter.
Can you imagine the
chaos that would bring?
We'd have every Joe Blow
running around blaming demons
for making them do bad things,
instead of their own sick,
fucked up conscience.
- So that's it?
You're just gonna
bury a little girl?
- Yep, we're gonna
bury a little girl.
- [Franklin] A little girl!
- It's not a little girl!
- Fine.
But you're gonna have
to do it without me.
(motorcycle engine rumbling)
(dramatic instrumental music)
(Paul pants heavily)
- [Paul] Not gonna get me!
- Just try and catch up.
- Oh, every time!
(Paul groans)
What are you on, six or seven?
(Paul grunts)
- Thank god!
- Oh, yeah.
Elder Thomas, the Lord's name!
- I'm sorry, Elder Paul!
I'm exhausted.
(Paul pants loudly)
I don't get how Ezekiel
and Matthew get Hawaii,
and we're stuck
here in the desert.
- (scoffs) God does
not give you tasks
that you cannot
handle, Elder Thomas.
- Handle Hawaii.
I need a juice.
- Oh!
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait!
I think this is...
This is-
- Hey,
nothin' fancy, I know,
but I bet they
have a nice, cold,
non-caffeinated
beverage in there.
- (scoffs) No!
- Oh!
Really?
- Think it's one of
those naked lady bars?
(clears throat) Well,
gonna have to get some
juice at the next place.
- Nah, if I don't get
something to drink right now,
I might die.
- Well, maybe we could
spread the word of the
Lord to those women?
Yes!
- Yes!
- You'll race me there, though.
Yeah, okay.
- (laughs) Come on!
(bicycle wheels clacking)
(gravel crunching)
(kickstands clattering)
Ah, man.
(Paul giggles)
- [Charlie] Pardon me, boys.
Could you spare a wretched
soul somethin' to eat?
- Yes, sir.
(upbeat rock music)
- Thank you, boys!
Thank ya so much.
God, bless your souls!
- [Paul] May I talk to you
about the gospel
of Jesus Christ?
- Hey, Morrigan, look at this.
These good boys are
spreadin' the word of God.
(upbeat rock music)
- Hmm, hmm.
(Dee grunts)
- Is that so?
- Yes, ma'am.
- Ma'am?
Aren't we proper!
Let me introduce everyone.
Kali, Jezebel,
Izanami, Chantico,
and there are more, but
they are currently working.
- Huh!
Guess I thought it'd
be Candy, or Charity,
or somethin' like that.
- [Jezebel] These
are our given names.
- You worried we bite?
(clacks teeth)
- No.
- Can I interest you guys
in a copy of-
- Oh, we are all
very well versed on all
the scriptures of God.
- Yeah, you all seem
pretty educated.
So why are you all,
you know,
dancing and taking your
clothes off for money?
(all laughing)
- Who said that was wrong?
- Umm....
- If you remember,
Adam and Eve were only
ashamed of their bodies
because they ate of
the forbidden fruit.
- That's true.
- So not being
ashamed of our bodies
would be what God would want.
- Don't mind me, boys.
- Hey, Charlie, where you goin'?
- What's wrong?
- Nothin', just
wanted to help him,
talk to him about
Christ's redemption.
- Redemption is that
man's middle name.
(upbeat rock music)
- Maybe you boys
should be on your way
before the sun goes down?
- Come on, Elder Thomas.
The desert is a pretty
dangerous place at night.
- [Thomas] I hope
our pass cross again.
- I hope for your
sake, they don't.
(upbeat rock music continues)
(door slams shut)
(indistinct chattering)
- [Famine] Ugh, I don't
know which is worse,
my wife or my girlfriend.
- Definitely your girlfriend.
- Oh, yeah?
Why is that?
- Because she's only 13!
(intense whooshing)
(Morrigan screaming)
(uptempo rock music)
(motorcycle engine roaring)
(motorcycle engine rumbling)
(kickstand clanks)
(gravel crunching)
(Franklin softly gasps)
- I'm sorry.
I was just looking
for something to eat.
I'm so hungry it hurts.
- No worries, brother.
As long as this
place serves food,
I'm sure we can
get you something.
I'm sorry.
How did you get here?
I mean, you couldn't
have walked, right?
I mean, are you stuck?
- Mmm, stuck?
Yeah, stuck perhaps.
Can't go anywhere.
Can't eat.
- Hey!
What's your name?
- Charlie.
- Let's say we get you
something to eat, Charlie?
- Okay, sweetie.
I want you to just
stay right here, okay?
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
You just...
You can't open your
mouth, sweetheart.
You just can't, okay?
(trunk hatch slams shut)
(G groans painfully)
- What's wrong with
your finger, G?
- [G] Nothin', nothin'.
Let's just...
Let's get this done before
it gets any worse, man.
- Yeah.
(Father Dupre speaks
in a foreign language)
- [Father Dupre] Okay?
You're gonna be okay.
(G exhales loudly)
- Seor, seor!
(Maria speaks in a
foreign language)
(Maria gently sobbing)
(G exhales loudly)
(gentle instrumental music)
(engine rumbling)
(Maria sobbing)
(engine roaring)
(gentle instrumental
music continues)
- Do we water it, or...
- It's a cactus, though.
- Yeah, but usually when you
plant something, you water it.
- But it's a cactus.
I don't know.
- Well, I thought
you knew everything?
- I'm not a botanist!
I don't know everything.
I mean, I'd be really
good at Jeopardy,
if all the categories
were about evil shit,
but other than that...
- I'll take ass
raidings by demons
in Zanzibar for
$500, please, Alex.
(Roshan chuckles)
- [Stewart] Seriously?
Seriously?
- Sorry.
- Huh?
- Sorry.
- Fuck!
Look, Franklin headed west.
We gotta go find him.
- Sound like he quit to me.
Maybe we should let him go?
- No one quits.
I mean, I know you haven't been
doing this as long as I have,
but once you're in, you're in.
That's it!
You don't see any
retired demon hunters walking
around out there, period!
You're in!
Fuck!
- I'm sorry.
He's right, though.
They will hunt you down in
your sleep if they have to.
They can smell the
knowledge you have of them,
and they don't take too
kindly to being prayed upon.
Think twice.
They'll get you
one way or another.
I'm sorry.
(suspenseful dramatic music)
- You gonna water it?
(footsteps departing)
- Well, you certainly
have an appetite.
- Yeah, I'm always hungry.
- So how'd you get stuck
all the way out here?
I mean, I'm not even sure
how I found the place.
- [Charlie] I think I made
a wrong turn somewhere.
Oh, no!
I screwed up again.
- Howdy, Franklin.
- You done with your hissy fit?
- Guys.
(dramatic instrumental music)
Guys, guys, guys, guys!
- Hello, boys.
Is there something
I can help you with?
(Roshan stammering)
- What the hell's
wrong with you?
You've never been to
a titty bar before?
- No, it's-
- Yeah, Roshan,
don't be so nervous, yeah?
- Why does he know your-
- No!
Guys, guys, guys, guys, guys!
(female giggling)
- Why are you so scared?
You never accidentally
stumbled into a pit
of an immortal
ancient demon before?
- Fuck me gently!
You're a demon?
- I prefer the term
mortally challenged.
(females laughing)
- Okay.
They're creepy, too.
So what do we do?
- So we're just supposed
to battle it out now?
'Cause I kinda wanna get
some stuff out of the jeep.
(blow thuds)
- You're not going anywhere.
- Sorry!
I'm so sorry I was-
- Quiet!
- Now, what do you say you,
I don't know, let us walk
outta here right now?
- Well, that's sort
of up to the ladies.
That's what they do.
- And what do you do?
- Me?
- Mm-hmm.
- I'm just a barkeep.
- Barkeep?
- Yeah!
(Dee chuckles)
- Yeah.
- It's a bar, ain't it?
I mean, where do you think
all the beer and food come from?
Magic?
- Hey, guys!
You're not gonna believe this.
There was nothing out that
way, so we're back here.
- (laughs nervously) Yeah.
Bikes were a bad
idea in the desert.
- Oh, don't talk like
that, Elder Paul.
I mean, the Lord works
in mysterious ways.
- Yes, he does.
- Eating again, Charlie?
I know!
I'm hungry again, too.
- Oh, no!
There's like cranberry juice
or somethin' all over this.
Good thing my pants are black.
- Sorry about that.
There was a business
man in her earlier,
and he made a hell of a mess.
- Wow!
It sure got busy in here.
Where'd everybody come from?
- Actually, it was
just clearin' out.
- Is it?
- Mm-hmm.
- You know, I hate goodbyes.
Let's just say,
(eerie dramatic music)
(mystical tinkling)
till next time.
(eerie dramatic music continues)
- [Stewart] Okay, let's go.
- Thank you!
Come again.
- Jesus Christ!
What the fuck was that?
- Holy shit!
We really didn't notice that?
- What the hell did
we just walk into?
- (stammering) I don't know.
- What do you mean,
you don't know?
- Well, I didn't know,
not until we walked through
that front door anyway.
- (yells indistinctly) Huh?
You get the bartender!
You get the girls
and the patrons!
- I think pretty
much the whole room.
- Oh, Christ!
- Except for those two
Mormon kids that came in.
They were definitely human.
- Gee, you think?
I was just about
to compliment them
on an amazing cover story.
- Well, you can't
always tell when-
- All right, come on guys.
What were they?
- I'm not positive.
- What?
- Okay.
But whenever a demon tells
you that they are ancient,
it's never a good thing.
You know that.
- We are truly fucked!
- You know, you really
swear a lot for a holy man.
- Well, you know, I ain't
exactly baptizin' babies,
or supervisin' bake sales
(speaks indistinctly)
and old ladies!
- I need to go to the library.
- I need to go to the library.
- What? Now?
- No, "the" library.
You'll see what
I'm talkin' about.
The closest one is about
a day's ride from here.
- All right, let's go!
Let's go!
(Stewart mumbles indistinctly)
(motorcycle engine rumbles)
(car engine roars)
(uptempo rock music)
(motor rumbling)
(gravel crunching)
(motorcycle engine rumbling)
(car doors slamming shut)
- [G] This is it?
- [Stewart] Yeah, I forgot
you've never been
to one of these.
- [G] It's a strange
lookin' library.
- [Stewart] It's
a strange ordeal.
(footsteps pattering)
- Where is this guy?
- I'm right here!
Changed my clothes
and everything.
Put on my outfit.
I have guests here.
Don't usually have a lot of
people hanging around, you know.
I'm pretty sure I
know what you want.
This is an emergency.
Okay, I'm sorry.
We stumbled upon a demon,
and we need your
help identifying it.
- A demon, huh?
That's kinda what I figured
you were doing here.
Let me look around and
see what I have over here.
That ain't it.
(book thuds)
Was it in human
form, this demon?
- Yes.
(book thuds)
And it had a lot of other
creatures there with it.
It said it was ancient.
- Well, that's not good.
(book thuds)
It attacked you, huh?
How did that happen?
How did it attack you?
- The thing is, it didn't.
It let us go.
- It just let a bunch of
you guys walk in the room,
into its den, and turn
around and let you walk out?
- I didn't think
it would either,
but two kids walked in,
and he just let us go.
- Yeah, that's
probably a good thing.
You know, I'm a
dyin' breed, fellas.
Not like a little baby
pops out of the womb,
and suddenly decides
it's gonna grow up,
and be a monk someday. (laughs)
- Don't get me
started on chastity.
I'd be on my 20th kid if it
wasn't for that. (chuckles)
Do you get it?
I'm Catholic.
- You don't say?
- Yeah. (mumbles softly)
- Now, here it is, "The
Ninth Sphere of Angels".
(book thuds)
This is the one.
- Angels?
- You know, most
people picture angels
as chubby, little
cherubs flyin' around
with wings on their back,
and they don't realize
that they don't
really look like that.
The truth is, the little
cherubs have four fuckin' heads,
and only one of 'em is human,
and it ain't a good
lookin' one either.
Ah, the watchers.
Was it a male or a female?
- The one that was doing
all the talking was a woman.
- Is that a good thing?
- Mmm, let's just say,
it's less bad, all right?
Some of these male watchers
kinda figured it was a good idea
to start mating
with some humans.
After that, they created a
race of their own, all right?
And they are dangerous.
They almost destroyed the Earth.
Listen, for a demon to show
compassion for any human being,
it's very rare.
It sounds to me like
what you're dealing with
is a dark angel,
like the red right hand of God.
- Does God really
need a red right hand?
I mean, can't he just-
- You know,
God believes that the only way
to let interaction
have its own way
is to let it occur on its own.
Has any of you
guys ever tried to
please everybody all the time?
- So it's evil like Lucifer.
As Satan, or Hades,
or the devil,
I mean, whatever you
wanna call the guy.
He doesn't make
people do bad things.
He lets them do it on their own,
as we all know that they do.
His only real actual job
is to punish the ones
that do make their own mistakes.
And that's his lot in
life, the poor bastard,
or I should say,
afterlife, right?
Evil souls are
filled with guilt,
so much so that they sink
down to the core of the earth,
burning and torturing
themselves for an eternity.
Good souls are light.
They can do whatever they
want in time and space.
Then there are lost souls,
that, for many reasons,
it's kind of hard to tell
what makes 'em that way.
They're stuck in
the moral gray area,
if there is such a thing,
much like the fallen
angels themselves.
It's the same thing.
They're often surrounded
by these lost souls,
and they just work
off the penance
for those non-mortal sins
that get committed, so.
so you're telling me,
heaven and hell are real?
- You're kidding me, right?
You hunt demons for a living.
- It's easier to
believe in monsters
than it is to believe
in the holy Father.
- Yeah, well, some of
the shit I've seen...
- So what's it doing here?
- They're trying to speed
along the judgment process.
They feel that
it's wrong to wait.
- Wait for what?
- Wait for the
evil souls to die.
Why should they get
to remain on earth?
All they wanna do is cause pain
and misery on the innocent.
The angels wanna see
'em all punished.
They can see right through
all of your souls, okay?
They can see all of your sins,
every single one
of yous, even mine,
but they can't
kill a good person.
It's kind of inherent in them.
They're still more angel than
they are demon, actually.
- So you're saying, innocent
souls are their kryptonite?
- So they walk the
earth in perpetuity
slaughtering the
souls of the wicked.
- Well, sounds like a
pretty good deal to me.
Maybe I should send em a
thank you card, flowers,
maybe a goat to sacrifice.
- No, no, no, no, no.
She's still an evil spirit,
and she does not get to decide
when it's your time to go.
- They're killing bad people.
Who cares?
- People change.
People can repent, right?
And they can find redemption.
It's not her place to judge.
Let me ask you,
are you a sinner?
Have you sinned, eh?
But are you, perfect?
Do you deserve the
right to die right now
before you can make amends?
I thought so.
- You know, we hunt demons.
That's what we do, period.
- We're not bad people, so
they can't harm us anyway!
- G!
- How do we stop it?
- Well, that depends
on what they look like.
- Kinda hot.
- I didn't mean like that.
I mean, like where do they
look like they're from?
Like when the angels
originally fell,
they spread across the world
and into every single culture.
They remain there,
unless, for whatever reason,
that culture abandons them.
They're known to wander
around, and so...
I mean, where did this one
look like she came from?
- There were actually
several of them,
and they looked like
they came from all over,
different parts of the globe.
- So what you're telling me
is that there are
multiple dark angels
altogether in one place?
- Is that bad?
- I don't know.
(laughs) I don't know.
You know what?
I don't know if I wanna know.
- My name is (speaks
indistinctly).
- Be right back, boys,
one way or the other.
- Well, that's what I wanna
talk to you about.
- You boys wanna play a game?
- Oh, yes!
That'd be awesome!
- [Female] What's
your poison, my lady?
Used to be anything
and everything,
and I'd do anything for it, too.
I pawned my grandmother's ring
just so I'd have
enough to get high.
It's one of the last things
I remember, honestly.
Wait a minute!
Where's my baby?
My baby!
Oh, god!
I got high,
and she's blue!
Why is she blue?
- We all have our demons.
I was a drunk.
I mean, seven nights a week,
drink till ya black
out every night drunk.
My family was pinchin'
pennies to survive,
and I was drinkin' away anything
I could get my hands on.
I drove home drunk,
like I always do.
Only this time,
I fell asleep in the garage
with the car running,
and my family was
inside sleeping.
I killed them all,
my wife, my three sons,
my little baby girl.
She had hazel eyes,
just like an angel.
- Oh, my god!
How did you go on?
- I didn't.
I died that night in the garage.
What's the last thing
you remember, Veronica,
before you got here?
(dramatic orchestral music)
- Is this hell?
- Hell is much worse.
Souls wallow in the guilt
and pain they caused
for all eternity.
- So where am I?
- Think of this as heaven's DMV.
- Purgatory?
How long am I here for?
- Till whenever.
- I know, it's empty,
and it'll always be empty.
Plus, it's strange
not to have a drink
in front of people at a bar.
You don't wanna spook the prey.
(indistinct chattering)
(angelic orchestral music)
(footsteps pattering)
- I'm glad your
friends are leavin'.
'Bout time I get this robe off.
Where the hell is the pages?
(pages rustling)
Oh, lordy!
Oh, here it is.
No, no, no, don't bother, man.
Listen, you know what?
Good luck to ya.
You're gonna need it.
Okay?
- Thank you.
- Don't buy anything from
someone who's out of breath.
- Okay.
- I'll see ya, young man.
- Yes, sir.
(pages rustling)
- Guys, I don't know about this.
- [Stewart] You know what?
We have to do it.
- Stewart's right.
I mean, they're still demons,
and they're huntin' mankind.
- Yeah, the piece of
shit part of mankind.
- Yeah, but come on!
People change.
They repent.
They ask for forgiveness.
God forgives them.
- Who says?
What part of what you just heard
makes you think there's any
other option besides up or down?
- Well, there's purgatory.
- Perhaps, that
sounds wonderful.
We should buy a fuckin'
time share there!
- Look, G, I don't know
what your concerns are,
your issues are.
It doesn't matter
what you've done.
But if you truly, truly repent,
the Lord will forgive you!
It's okay!
- Well, I'm glad you
believe that, Father,
but I have a strange feeling
it all stays on our
permanent record.
- You know, G, maybe he's right.
Maybe he's right.
- Then it's our place
to vanquish the demons.
- I mean, look, sometimes
the most awful human beings
can change their life, and
do something good with it.
I mean...
- What if they kill the
guy who cures cancer?
- Really?
You know what?
Count me out!
I'm not risking my fuckin'
neck for a bunch of scumbags
that I would
happily kill myself!
Fuck that!
(intense high pitched ringing)
(rapid gunshots firing)
Contact right, contact right!
(rapid gunshots continue firing)
Cover!
- Cover, cover!
Go!
(rapid gunshots firing)
(rapid gunshots continue firing)
- [G] Everybody okay?
Anybody hit?
- No, Top, we're good.
- Goddamn shithole!
Why are we riskin' our necks
for people that
don't wanna be saved?
- You know, sometimes
people that need to be saved
just don't know it.
- Are you willing to
risk your life for it?
- No, I risk my
life for you guys.
If something happened
because I wasn't here, pfft.
How are we doin' on ammo?
(soldiers yelling indistinctly)
- I'm low.
- Want me to get it, Top?
- No, I got it.
(rapid gunshots firing)
(G exhales loudly)
Shit!
- [Roshan] See,
that's interesting,
because it a
combination of both.
(indistinct chattering
in the background)
(dramatic instrumental music)
- Change of heart?
- Somethin' like that.
- That makes sense.
Roshan thinks he's
got something.
- I do.
- Okay, how do we destroy him?
- We can't.
- All right.
How do we banish him?
- We can't.
- Cool story, bro.
Yeah, I really think
this might be a bad idea.
- No, we can immobilize them.
- [G] Okay, I'm interested.
- Okay, they're immortal, right?
But they're still
physical beings.
So all we have to do is,
chop them up into pieces,
and then bury
everything separately.
(G chuckles)
- Uh-huh.
- That's all?
That's all we gotta do?
Take a supernatural being
that's older than time,
and cut it up with a
steak knife, until what,
it rips out our spine and
makes a bow out of it?
- No, see, they can't kill us!
We're not like serial killers
or anything like that.
We're good people, right?
Now, the book doesn't say,
you know, how strong
they are specifically.
You know, and they're
certainly unique,
but it's not that different
from what we usually do.
- Right.
- I think we got this.
- You know, maybe we can...
Maybe we can surround the club,
you know, and draw them out?
- Well, what about all
the lost souls in the bar?
I mean, there was at
least a dozen of 'em.
- Oh, no, no, they
can't harm us at all.
They're like worker bees.
In fact, I'm not even sure
they're physical at
this point in time.
- Okay.
Okay, this might work.
- Yeah.
- Excellent!
Now we're all happy
families again,
I actually have an idea.
Who wants a confession?
(G blows raspberry)
- Nope!
- Mm-mmm.
- It couldn't hurt
anything, right?
(book thuds)
- Hell yeah!
(upbeat rock music)
(Stewart speaks indistinctly)
(G groans)
- There is is, brother.
- Yeah.
- [G] Father?
- Thanks.
- That's nice.
(gun clanks)
(guns clicking)
- Dude, a grenade?
- He said, "In pieces".
(gun clatters)
(gloves rustling)
(hands thudding)
(knuckles cracking)
- You know what?
Holy water literally
doesn't work on anything.
I mean, anything.
(blade clanking)
- [Franklin] Yeah,
well, it's not the
holy water that doesn't work,
it's the faith that wavered.
- Something tells me, the Lord
will be with us this time.
- You think bullet will work?
- Hell, a shotgun blast to the
face slows most things down.
Let's go, (speaks indistinctly).
(engine rumbling)
(car doors slamming shut)
(intense dramatic music)
(female screams in the distance)
(voices howling in the distance)
Yep!
(G exhales loudly)
- So you think they're
going to come out?
- I don't know,
but we can't be
good for business
standing around
out here like this.
- Well, I hope they do,
'cause when it comes to waitin',
time is definitely on our side.
- Look, all the books say,
they're supposed to be
out roaming the earth
looking for souls to reap.
I have no idea why
they're all gathered here
staying in one place.
- Yeah, well, maybe we're
about to stop something
more serious from
happenin' here.
- [G] Yeah, I'm startin'
to agree with you on that.
- Oh, shit!
Why are the Mormon
kids still here?
- Why are the Mormon
kids still here?
I mean, where else have
they gotta go, huh?
You want us to take those bikes
and go back to where
we just came from, huh?
(indistinct chattering)
- Jezebel.
- I know.
(suspenseful dramatic music)
(Jezebel cracks knuckles)
- I'll take care of it!
- Dee?
(door creaks open)
(door slams shut)
- [Dee] Yeah, Jez?
- Why don't you show the
boys our shed in the back?
- (chuckles) Absolutely.
(continues chuckling) Okay.
Hey, fellas, come with me.
You're in for a big treat here.
You're gonna see the
priceless antiquities
that the ladies have collected
over the years. (chuckles)
Come on.
- Stay seated, Charlie!
They had their chance.
(suspenseful dramatic music)
(electricity whirring)
(intense whooshing)
(mystical chiming)
- Something I can help you with?
(intense whooshing)
We've been roaming this world
since before your kind
could start a fire.
You really think you
can stand against us?
Do you really think we haven't
dealt with hunters before?
- [Franklin] Fuck you!
(Franklin groans)
(Kali laughs)
(explosions booming)
(rapid gunfire blasting)
- Come on, ya bitch!
(gunshots blasting)
(electricity whooshing)
(disembodied screaming)
(electricity crackling)
(explosion booming)
(glasses rattling)
(boys gasping)
- Sounds like
something just blew up.
- That's just the military.
They kinda test new ordinance
out here all the time, you know?
- That sounded super close!
- Yeah, (laughs) I
wouldn't worry about that.
All the time it happens.
You know what?
But you're gonna love this.
Wait till you see this gold
violin that Jezebel has.
Now, Paganini used this.
He used to practice on it.
- Paganini?
- Wait till you see this.
- Paganini.
(suspenseful dramatic music)
- All right.
- Oh, this is gross!
- Okay, keep all
the pieces separate.
Keep 'em all separate.
Hurry!
(Roshan groans)
Get 'em all separate.
(male groans)
(suspenseful dramatic
music continues)
- Well, we got about a
hundred more pieces like this
where they came from.
- Why are you doing this?
You had a chance to walk away.
- Because that's what we do.
We're here to protect mankind
from creatures and demons
that haunt this earth.
- [Izanami] Well, that's funny.
- Why is that?
- Because you're not that
different from us after all.
- (sighs loudly)
Don't know about that.
See, it's not your have
place to judge, is it?
- Are you sure about that?
- Absolutely.
- 'Cause you believe in it,
or because you're
counting on it?
- Father, this place is
full of second chances.
Why, look at Charlie here.
Charlie, do you even
remember what you did?
Charles was quite the
military man back in the day.
Maybe you can appreciate
that, Sergeant Gerard.
- Turns out, just
following orders
isn't a good enough excuse.
- You know what?
This ends and it ends now.
- Such a rush to
meet your maker.
Are you sure it's him?
You'll see when it's
all said and done.
- We know you can't kill us.
We're good people.
- Then you should have no
problem facing your demons then.
(intense dramatic music)
(electricity whirring)
(mystical chiming)
(intense dramatic music)
(blows thudding)
(both grunting)
- I guess you demons
have a lot of time to
practice this, huh?
- (laughs) We invented it.
(intense dramatic
music continues)
(footsteps pattering)
(Roshan whispers indistinctly)
(intense dramatic
music continues)
(door handle rattles)
(intense dramatic
music continues)
(Roshan pants heavily)
(lighter flicking)
- Come on, come on!
(intense eerie music)
(Roshan groans)
(continues groaning)
(intense eerie music)
(car door clatters open)
(Roshan mumbles)
(Roshan screams)
(body thuds)
(air whooshing)
(Roshan grunts)
(suspenseful dramatic music)
(intense screeching)
(Roshan groans painfully)
(intense screeching continues)
Oh!
- [Morrigan] You are
foolishly overconfident.
(Morrigan laughs maniacally)
(intense eerie music)
(blow thuds)
(Roshan groans)
(footsteps pattering)
(blow thuds)
(Roshan groans)
(blow thuds)
(Roshan grunts loudly)
- Wait a minute!
Wait, no!
(body thuds)
(Roshan pants heavily)
You can't kill me.
I'm a good person.
You can't kill me.
- You're right,
I can't kill you.
I can torture you.
I mean, you don't need
your arms, do you?
(Roshan groans painfully)
You don't need your eyes.
- I need my eyes!
I need my eyes, please!
Don't!
Don't take my eyes!
- You need your eyes?
- I do! (pants heavily)
(intense screeching)
Ow!
(Roshan groans)
(eerie suspenseful music)
- Franklin, Franklin,
what are you doing here?
(intense whooshing)
- It's my job.
I protect the innocent.
- Hmm, isn't it a
little late for that?
(blow thuds)
(intense dramatic music)
(Sekhmet laughs)
(blow whooshing)
(electricity crackling)
(mystical chiming)
(Franklin groans)
(intense whooshing)
Get back up.
(intense whooshing)
(blow thuds)
(eerie suspenseful music)
(gun clatters)
(eerie suspenseful
music continues)
- (laughs) You got him!
(video game plays in background)
(sighs) Frankie, I
gotta go help your
grandmother out
for a few minutes.
Can you please walk
your sister home
from her dance class at six?
- Yeah, Mom, sure.
- Yeah?
All right, I'm serious.
I'm counting on you.
- All right, I got it!
Don't worry, I got it.
- All right.
(taps couch)
Love you, baby.
I'll be back as fast as I can.
(intense whooshing)
(Franklin breathes shakily)
- You wanna protect people?
Then what happened
that day, Frankie?
(Franklin continues
breathing shakily)
(intense dramatic music)
- Julie?
Where are you?
Frankie, where's Julie?
(door clatters)
(intense rumbling)
(mystical chiming)
(electricity whirring)
(body thuds)
(Franklin groans)
(eerie suspenseful music)
(intense whooshing)
(body thuds)
(intense dramatic music)
(electricity sizzling)
(Franklin pants heavily)
(intense screeching)
(mystical chiming)
(electricity whirring)
- [Franklin] No!
(Franklin screaming)
(somber instrumental music)
Get out!
(Franklin screaming)
(body thuds)
(Franklin gently sobbing)
(Father Dupre grunts)
(snake hissing)
(feet shuffling)
(Father Dupre pants heavily)
- What?
(Father Dupre
whispers indistinctly)
(intense screeching)
(Father Dupre pants heavily)
(intense screeching)
(dramatic suspenseful music)
- Forgive me, Father,
for I have sinned.
(electricity whirring)
(intense eerie music)
It's been 100,000 years
since my last confession.
- It's never too late
to confess to the Lord.
(Father Dupre grunts)
(sword clanks)
Stop this madness!
- [Chantico] Oh, no, a knife?
I hear hammers
work just as well.
(lighter flicking)
- [Parishioner] Forgive me,
Father, for I have sinned.
I fear I have done an
egregious act against the Lord,
one for which I feel I
can never be forgiven.
- Please take a seat, son.
(Parishioner sighs)
Tell me your sins,
and the Lord will forgive
those who truly, truly repent.
- [Parishioner] My
wife is cheating on me
with my closest friend.
- I am sorry, son.
Sometimes life just-
- So I killed him.
I fucking killed him.
I went into work early,
and took a hammer,
and bashed in his
fucking skull. (laughs)
Father, do you think the
Lord can still forgive me?
I don't wanna go to hell.
I'm so sorry.
I'm so, so, so sorry.
I just felt so betrayed.
(Parishioner sobs)
- The Lord will forgive those
who are truly, truly
sorry and repent,
for that is what is written.
(Parishioner breathes heavily)
- [Parishioner] Thank you.
Thank you, Father.
I am so sorry.
I'm so sorry.
I just didn't wanna go to hell.
(laughs) Thank you, Father.
(dramatic instrumental music)
(fingers tapping)
(Parishioner pants heavily)
(blow thuds)
(blood squelching)
(hammer clatters)
(Father Dupre breathes shakily)
- I thought he would
turn himself in.
I thought he was truly sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I didn't realize...
I didn't realize it,
I'd give him a green light
to kill his entire family.
(Father Dupre mumbles)
(breathes shakily)
I didn't know.
I didn't know, I didn't know!
- Yet, still to this day, you
preach forgiveness, Father.
(body thuds)
(Father Dupre groans)
(dramatic instrumental music)
(Father Dupre yells
out painfully)
- It's true!
(bone cracking)
(Father Dupre screams)
I thought he forgives
all who repent?
- Forgiveness is not the
same thing as acceptance!
(bone cracking)
(Father Dupre screams)
You and only you are responsible
for your final destination.
- Yeah! (pants heavily)
(air whooshing)
(blows thudding)
- [Izanami] Something
on your mind, Stewart?
- You should know, huh?
Isn't that what you demons do?
- Amuse me.
I live for what you die for.
(intense whooshing)
- Hey, Marie.
What's going on?
Where's the baby?
Fuck you!
Fuck you!
(somber instrumental music)
(door creaks open)
(intense rumbling)
(G groans)
(object clatters)
(intense dramatic music)
- Something's weighing
on your soul, Sergeant.
I could smell it
all the way outside.
- Yeah, well, I knew the
deal when I came back here,
but you already know that.
You already know everything.
- But do you?
- [Soldier] How
we doin' on ammo?
- I'm low!
- I'm low.
- Want me to get it, Top?
- No, I got it.
(intense dramatic music)
(door slams shut)
(gravel crunching)
No, no, no, no, no, no!
(intense dramatic
music continues)
Don't do it, kid!
Don't do it, kid!
Jesus!
(intense ringing)
I had to make a choice.
- Your men or the child.
- I had to make a choice.
I-
- I know.
I know.
(intense whooshing)
- No, no, no, no, no, no!
(gun cocks)
Don't do it, kid!
(dramatic instrumental music)
No, don't do it!
(gunshot firing)
(explosion booming)
(intense ringing)
(dramatic instrumental music)
I chose my brothers.
We lost so many,
but I'm still here,
and I gotta live with
that every single day.
So just do it!
Kill me!
Come on, rip my heart out,
send me straight to hell!
Do what you do.
What, you want me
to do it for ya?
(gun clatters)
- I can't!
You didn't do anything wrong.
You're not the one
that killed that kid.
That sin is on whoever
used him as a weapon.
Some things aren't sins,
even when you want them to be.
- What are you doing?
I thought...
- I can't kill you, Sergeant.
And this is what
you came for, right?
So do it.
I'm glad your conscious
is exonerated, Gerard,
but you're a hunter.
Didn't you come for a prize?
- No.
- No?
That's not my sister
in pieces over there?
- I was just...
You guys kill people!
- Yeah, bad people!
Is that any different
than banishing any
other kind of evil?
Oh, yeah, that plague demon,
that's some dark shit.
Be glad it wasn't
Famine you touched.
You know, we're not that
different you and I.
We're both just sending things
to hell where they belong.
- Yeah, what about redemption?
- There are some sins
that are so heavy
nothing can stop the souls
from sinking to
the depths of hell.
Nothing!
You think you can drive a
busload of kids off a cliff,
and just be really sorry?
You know, Hitler begged
God for forgiveness, too.
He's still in hell.
- Yeah, but what about-
(Jezebel scoffs)
- He shows you the way.
He doesn't decide where you go.
Only you do.
Speaking of which,
I hope your friends
walked in here
with as clean a conscience.
- I blame myself
for it every day.
It's all my fault.
I should have been
there for her!
I'm so sorry, Julie.
I'm sorry.
- Don't apologize to me.
(Franklin gently sobbing)
- Jules.
I'm so sorry I
wasn't there for you.
I'm so sorry.
- It's okay.
I know, I forget
things all the time.
- But what happened
to you was so awful.
- Julie, there's some nice
boys out back with Dee.
I think they're looking
at our old trinkets.
- Jules.
(Franklin continues
gently sobbing)
I took care of Buttons for ya.
Oh, Jules.
- [Sekhmet] She doesn't
know what happened that day,
and I'd like to
keep it that way.
- Is she stuck
here because of me?
- She'll be fine.
She's free to wander the
earth wherever she may want.
Though, the young often do not
understand what has happened.
- So she's okay?
- It is hard for anyone
that young to carry sin.
She is freer than
most will ever be.
She will grow up in
time, in a sense.
It will just take a lot
longer, like a long dream.
- Oh, Father Dupree,
have you truly
succumbed to hiding,
or are you preparing
to take my confession?
- I didn't know!
(grunts) I didn't know.
I lived my whole life as a lie.
I have my blood in my hands.
(electronic whirring)
(Father Dupree gasps)
(intense whooshing)
(body thuds)
(Father Dupree groans)
(Father Dupree pants heavily)
(groans loudly and coughs)
(panting heavily increasing)
(Father Dupree breathes shakily)
- [Chantico] How does it feel?
- The Lord knows my soul.
(intense whooshing)
(Father Dupree
grunting painfully)
Yeah, I know it hurts.
Does it feel like a dozen
or more hammer blows
about the head and face?
(Father Dupree gasping)
(intense dramatic music)
(Father Dupree yelling)
- Jesus, forgive me!
(Chantico laughs)
- [Chantico] I'm sorry,
he's not here right now.
It's just us girls.
- [Father Dupre] (groaning
painfully) Please!
(continues groaning painfully)
- Father Dupree,
don't get too comfortable.
That was just the first one.
He did murder five people,
and you're gonna feel each one.
(screaming in the distance)
- Is it-
- Sounds like
someone's screamin'
- Huh?
- Should we...
Let's go check it out?
- No, I didn't hear nothin'.
(gravel crunching)
What?
(painful screaming
in the distance)
Oh! (laughs)
Yeah, you know what that is?
That sounds almost human,
but those are coyotes.
They sound hauntin' yippin'.
You know, they do that cry.
- Yeah, I'd say!
- That's all it is,
it's some coyotes.
- Sounds like a guy
gettin' beat to death.
(all laughing)
- Yeah-huh.
- Is that a pimp cup?
- No, what it is-
- Let's drink out of it.
- That's a very sacred
object that one.
(both boys laughing)
- Hand me that.
Let me see.
Oh!
- Wow!
Whoa, look at these scrolls!
These are old!
- Oh, it was some job switchin'
them out, let me tell you.
- Yeah?
- Mm-hmm.
- Okay, are these movie props?
I'm half expecting to find
the Ark of the Covenant
in here. (laughs)
- No, that's in Nova
Scotia, (mumbles).
(all laughing)
- Wow!
- Look at this.
- I know!
These are cool!
- Look at, look at.
- [Dee] I'll be right
back, gentlemen.
I'll be right back, okay?
- This sharp?
Okay.
- Yeah, there's...
I'll be right back.
(spring clanging)
- Ow!
- Look at this.
Poke me.
(both laughing)
This is cool.
- Let me see this.
(Thomas laughs)
- Oh, there's another one!
(blows thudding)
- [Stewart] Ow!
(dramatic orchestral music)
(blade whooshing)
(both grunting)
(blow thuds)
(Stewart groans)
(skin squelching)
(suspenseful dramatic music)
(blows thudding)
(Izanami groans)
- Really?
(electricity whooshing)
I'm sorry to inform
you, Stewart,
but I'm not so easy to kill,
unlike other people.
(intense whooshing)
(body thuds)
(intense whooshing)
(suspenseful dramatic music)
(Stewart pants heavily)
What did you do, Stewart?
- [Stewart] What
the fuck did you do?
You fuckin' evil bitch,
what the fuck did you do?
- He wouldn't stop crying.
- I didn't do anything,
at least I don't think I did.
You wanted him to
stop crying, huh?
- For once,
- Huh?
- I just wanted him
- For once?
- to be quiet!
- Huh?
That's why you wanted
him to be quiet?
- Are you sure?
- You wanted him to be quiet!
(wife yells indistinctly)
- I'm not-
(body thuds)
- I don't know.
Get up!
Get up!
Get up.
(object clatters)
(Stewart gently sobs)
Okay, all right.
(melancholic piano music)
I don't know.
- And how do you think
your friends will fare?
You walk them right
into the demon pit,
never asked if there was
darkness in their souls.
- They're good people!
They're helping humanity.
- We're protecting humanity.
Can't you see?
(Roshan groans)
- Please, please let me go.
I have so many more
people I wanna help.
(intense whooshing)
(electricity whirring)
(body thuds)
(Roshan yells out painfully)
- Okay, you can go.
- What?
- I just had to stall
you for a little while.
- Are you serious?
- You want me to change my mind?
- No, no!
(Roshan groans)
(Morrigan laughs maniacally)
(metal clangs)
- Hey, buddy.
What happened to you?
Looks like you got a
pretty bad cut there.
There.
Let me take a look.
- No, no, no, no, no, no!
Keep away!
If he so much as puts a finger
on you, you will starve.
You understand that?
No matter how much you eat,
your skin will shrivel,
your body will eat itself,
but you won't die.
You'll remain a crumbled
mess of just flesh
and dust until the next
poor creature comes along,
and makes the mistake
of touchin' you,
and then you'll get
the caress of death.
Now, let's get outta here.
Come on, come on.
(prisoner growling)
(prisoner pants heavily)
(indistinct chattering)
- Guess we're not
conquering the demons.
- I think in many
ways, we just did.
Where's Roshan, Dupree?
- Okay, come on.
(Roshan groans painfully)
There he is.
Hey, fellas!
Your boy needs some help here.
He's gonna blow.
(stomach growling loudly)
- You okay?
(Roshan gagging)
- What the hell, bro?
- Is everybody okay?
- Dupree is still missin'.
(Roshan breathes heavily)
Where is he?
(suspenseful dramatic music)
(body thuds)
What the hell's wrong with him?
What'd you do?
- He's just got a
splitting headache.
He'll be fine.
He might need some
counseling, though.
Maybe a few Hail
Mary's. (laughs)
Give him a minute, though.
He just died five times.
- [G] What? Why?
- He didn't do anything
bad to go to hell.
He just, you know, needed to
learn an important lesson.
(Father Dupree
shuddering loudly)
- Yeah.
The path to
enlightenment is painful.
- See, I probably saved his
soul from running up here.
You good, Frankie?
(dramatic instrumental music)
- He'll be fine.
Is everyone going to be fine?
(Izanami sighs loudly)
(body parts thudding)
- Well, I hope you guys
all like jigsaw puzzles.
(body parts squelching)
(Roshan groans)
- Still better than the time
I was thrown from a tower,
and eaten by dogs.
I've been roaming
for a very long time.
- You still owe me
for what I had to do to
find all those pieces.
- A Pagan priest released
famine onto my land,
and then they blamed me,
accused me of witchcraft.
Talk about projection.
Unfortunately, history
is written by men
with their flaws and
their narratives.
- Hey, you want help with that?
- It's fine.
It's not like you know what
you're looking at anyway.
- Well, yeah, that's true.
- So are we free to go?
- You're not gonna
punish us more for-
- You meant well,
unlike others who have tried.
- Gentlemen, I think
you should take
the ladies' generous
offer to go.
- Stewart, you ready to go?
- You can leave
here now, Stewart.
Accidentally killing someone
is not gonna send you to hell.
It's whether or not
you had the intent.
- Look, what if it
was done on purpose?
- But it wasn't.
Well, let's just
leave it at that.
- Honestly, I'd have thrown
her through the wall,
but I don't have a
soul to worry about.
- What demons possessed her?
I mean, this whole
journey started
on me trying to find out
what kinda evil soul-
- Stewart,
that wasn't a demon.
That was just her.
Don't worry, that bitch
is burning in hell.
There's no insanity
defense in the afterlife.
Psychos know the difference
between wrong and right.
They just don't care.
- Keep up the good work.
We'll hold it down here.
- Hey, wait, wait, wait!
Why are all of you in one
place at the same time?
- You really wanna know?
- "Better the devil
you know", they say.
- War is coming.
- But war happens all the time.
What do you mean?
- No, war,
one of the four horsemen
of the apocalypse,
he's coming for Famine.
He's in the back room.
- I hope you didn't touch him.
- No, (stammers) I
didn't touch him.
Did you...
You mean, the four
horsemen of the apocalypse?
- Well, the method of
transportation isn't the issue.
And I have to admit, that
the translation is a bit off,
but, yes, plague,
famine, war, and death,
but death of everything.
Now, during your journey, if
you should come across war,
I beg you, please don't engage.
- Why not?
- Because anyone who kills
him, he will take his body.
So you should leave
that to the ladies.
- Yeah, it's a good idea.
- Yeah.
- You all right?
- Yeah, I'm good.
- Hey, Stewart?
- Yeah?
- We'll catch you next time.
- All right.
(bicycles clattering)
- Wow, that sure was fun!
- (laughs) I know!
And Julie was so sweet.
- She was.
- Yeah.
- [G] Hey, fellas,
you need a lift?
Might be a little tight,
but I think we can
fit you in the back.
- [Jezebel] Boys, if you
go a mile up the road,
you'll see a sheriff's station.
Officer Dan will escort
you safely out of the area.
- Okay, thank you.
- Goodbye!
Goodbye!
- Okay, so what's their deal?
- They're human.
I'm sorry to disappoint you.
- I'm not disappointed.
It's just, I'm-
- Just as there are sinners
there are saints.
- [Franklin] So the
Mormons got it right?
- (scoffs) Organized religion
has nothing to do with it.
I swear, you people make
things more complicated
than it needs to be.
Just Remember the Golden Rule.
- Wait, so it's
really that simple,
just do unto others?
- Yes, it's really that simple.
Don't do anything to someone
you wouldn't want
done to yourself.
- You know, I get
so many questions-
- No!
Every time we try to explain
things to you, you screw it up.
(intense rumbling)
I believe you'd
like to return that.
- She's okay?
- I pulled a favor
for my brother.
You're lucky, I'm his favorite.
He wants to know how the hell
you planted that
Jumpin' Cholla bush?
- (chuckles) Well,
it wasn't easy,
but that was the point, right?
- Just don't tell
the Catholic senorita
that Satan dropped
off her little girl.
She thinks he was a
friendly stranger.
They always do.
And for what it's worth,
you did the right thing.
The last time it got out, it
killed a third of the world.
It came at a cost, though.
I had to offer it a
more appetizing host.
We'll deal with that later.
- Well, thank you.
Thank you very much.
- Now, go be good!
I'd hate to see you back here.
- What was that?
Well, we got a stop to make.
- I need to talk to my mother.
- We all got a lot to
talk about, brother.
- Popobawa
- Poga-what?
- The ass raping
demon from Zanzibar.
- No, wait!
- That's real.
- I was only jokin' about that!
- No, it's real.
- No, I mean-
- No, it's not real.
You've gotta be kidding me.
- I'm never going
to Zanzibar ever!
- [G] How long you been
lookin' at that shit?
(engines rumbling)
(upbeat rock music)
(engine roaring)
(upbeat rock music continues)
- No fuckin' way!
- Not today, Satan.
Not today.
- It's a good thing Franklin
didn't try to pick him up.
- He would never
fit on his bike.
You see the size of him?
- Actually, that was war.
- That was war,
and he's coming to get us all.
- Yep.
(intense dramatic music)
(suspenseful dramatic music)
(intense dramatic music)
(gravel crunching)
(suspenseful dramatic music)
(lighter flicking)
(suspenseful dramatic
music continues)
(hands thudding)
(upbeat rock music)
(suspenseful dramatic music)
(upbeat rock music)
(gunshot firing)
(rapid gunshots firing)
(male speaks in a
foreign language)
(group chattering in
a foreign language)
(rapid gunshots firing)
(suspenseful dramatic music)
- You guys cover the back.
(upbeat rock music)
(gunshot blasting)
(upbeat rock music continues)
(rapid gunshots firing)
(gun clatters)
(rapid gunshots firing)
(gun cocks)
- Shit!
(gunshot blasting)
(gun magazine clanks)
(gun clatters)
(male yells indistinctly)
(gunshot blasting)
(assailant yells)
(sword clanks)
(gunshot blasting)
(pounding on door)
- [Franklin] G!
(pounding on door continues)
G, we're waitin' on you!
(G pants heavily)
(door lock clatters)
- [G] What's up?
- [Franklin] You all right?
- Yeah, I'm alright.
- [Franklin] We got one.
- All right, give me a minute.
(door creaking)
(door thuds shut)
(upbeat rock music)
Let's go.
(upbeat rock music continues)
(dramatic instrumental music)
(motorcycle engines rumbling)
- Whoo!
- Dee's Money Pit.
- What an appropriate name
for a titi bar out in
the middle of nowhere.
- Who would build a strip
club all the way out here?
- I don't know,
but I kinda wanna find out.
(lighter flicking)
- You're kidding me, man!
I don't even wanna know what
a daytime stripper looks like,
especially in a
shit hole like this.
- (laughs) There's cars.
- Yeah, so?
- Only the finest
desert skank works here.
Come on, let's
get our dicks wet.
- Hey, what the hell!
(engines rumbling)
(motorcycle engines
continue rumbling)
(Richard groans)
(Wes exhales loudly)
- [Wes] Wow!
(bodies thudding)
- Pardon me, sir?
I don't mean to
bother you gentlemen.
- You watch yourself, old man.
- I ain't lookin'
for money or a drink!
I was just hopin'
that maybe you could
spare me something to eat.
(Wes laughs)
- Let me tell
you somethin', old man.
If I wanna spend my money,
I'm gonna spend it on
tits and ass right there.
So get outta here!
(Charlie thuds)
(Wes laughs)
- What?
(both laughing)
(Wes continues laughing)
(upbeat rock music)
- Look at this place.
It's crazy.
Hey, baby, where are you goin'?
- Seriously, get
off me, asshole.
- Oh, excuse me, Miss Attitude.
- Cockle-doodle-doo!
(Wes laughs and claps hands)
Whoo!
(Wes continues laughing
and clapping hands)
(indistinct chattering)
(intense whooshing)
- Howdy.
- Howdy.
- Can I get you fellas a drink?
- [Wes] Yeah, a whiskey.
- [Richard] Make that two.
- [Dee] Comin' up.
(upbeat rock music)
(indistinct chattering)
- [Richard] Most the
people of this town
got a staring
problem or somethin'?
- Oh, you gotta forgive 'em.
You know, they just
get a little excited
when they see a new vic,
new strangers come into town.
That's all.
- [Richard] And why is that?
- [Dee] Oh, just...
Just is.
That's all.
- Well, maybe they don't
see the patch on my back?
- Satan's few.
- Look at you, fine
ass lookin' thing.
I almost forgot why
we came in here.
- [Richard] How come all
you girls have your top on?
I wanna see some tit.
- It's not that
kind of place, sir.
- [Dee] I don't
think you're gonna
wanna pay the price. (laughs)
- Hey, do you have a
VIP room in this place?
- Some would say, this entire
place is one giant VIP.
- [Wes] Well, how much is it?
(upbeat rock music)
(indistinct chattering)
- It's $100 for 15 minutes.
- $100?
And what does that get us?
- You get a lap
dance for 15 minutes.
- Oh, come on!
A strip club in the
middle of nowhere?
You expect me to believe
that there's no tug of
war in the back rooms?
- This really isn't the
place you think it is.
- Broads with daddy issues,
Watered down drinks,
no, I believe I know
exactly where I am,
and what you are.
- What am I?
Enlighten me.
- You're just some
fucked up bitch
that ain't shit
without that fake rack,
and that real fine ass.
(hand smacking)
(deep growling)
(intense whooshing)
(eerie suspenseful music)
(blood squelching)
(Wes groans)
(Wes gagging)
- Wes, stop actin'
like a pussy, man.
She didn't hit you
that hard. (laughs)
Fuckin' cunt.
(Wes gagging)
Holy shit!
What are you guys?
- Come on, Richard!
Don't you recognize
Satan's kind?
- Your demons or some shit!
- Your friend might
have been right
about the daddy issues.
- Look, he was
outta fuckin' line,
but you didn't have
to fuckin' kill him.
- [Sekhmet] Oh,
he's not dead, yet.
- Look, I'll walk out that door,
and I promise, I swear, I
won't tell nobody nothin'!
- That's funny.
That's exactly
what Mr. Tran said.
- Who?
- Oh, that's the
nice store owner
you and your little
buddy here robbed.
He begged and pleaded he
wouldn't say anything,
and you killed him anyway.
- How the fuck
did you know that?
- Because it weighs
heavy on your soul.
- Fuck you, demons!
You're going to-
(blow thuds)
(Richard yells)
(skin squelching)
(intense dramatic music)
(Richard gagging)
(blood dripping)
(police siren chirping)
(car door slams shut)
(intense dramatic
music continues)
(glass clattering)
- Holy shit!
What kinda damn crime do
we have going on here?
(exhales loudly) Never
waste a good scotch.
(Dee chuckles)
- Hallelujah!
- Kanpai.
- You know, the vehicles are
startin' to pile up out front.
I can get Dale Tucker,
and he'll do a sweep
with the tow truck.
- Okay.
- And these guys have got
some nice motorcycles.
I don't wanna scrap those.
- Well, you know, just
have a go at what you like.
You know, you've
done so much for us.
- Kosher?
- As kosher as a brit milah.
(all laughing)
I don't think these
boys will be ridin'
anytime soon again, anyway.
- No. (chuckles)
- Like some more?
- Yes, please.
(Dee chuckles)
Double!
- You need it.
- [G] So is this kid
really possessed,
or is this another disciplinary
issue or somethin'?
- She's probably
just a little brat.
(gravel crunching)
(knocking on door)
(door creaks open)
(Maria speaks in a
foreign language)
(Father Dupre speaks
in a foreign language)
(Maria speaks in a
foreign language)
(Father Dupre speaks
in a foreign language)
(Maria speaks in a
foreign language)
- She said, "Her baby's
possessed by the devil".
(Maria breathes unsteadily)
(Father Dupre speaks
in a foreign language)
Okay.
(Father Dupre speaks
in a foreign language)
(door creaks open)
(suspenseful dramatic music)
- Isabel?
Mi amor?
Mi beb?
Hi, baby.
Isabel?
(Maria breathes shakily)
- Isabel?
Sweetheart, I heard you're
not feelin' so well.
(suspenseful dramatic music)
(Isabel screams in
a disembodies voice)
(disembodied voice
continues screaming)
- [Stewart] What the
fuckin' fuck was that?
- Yeah, that
definitely is a demon.
- Yeah, no shit!
- Yeah.
- And if it is
what I think it is,
it's a very, very,
very old creature.
Maria, have you guys
changed the land recently,
dug a well, anything like that?
(Father Dupre speaks
in a foreign language)
(Maria speaks in a
foreign language)
- [Roshan] What'd she say,
what'd she say, what'd she say?
- They dug up a
Joshua tree last week,
and Isabella helped them.
- [Roshan] How big was the tree?
(Maria gently sobbing)
(Father Dupre speaks
in a foreign language)
(Maria continues sobbing)
- [Stewart] Oh, it
definitely sounds bad.
- Okay, look, the original
people of the land
must have buried it
underneath that tree.
When they ripped the tree out,
they released it.
- But released what?
- It's a pestilence demon.
They're the embodiment
of sickness and disease.
It can level a
village in a week,
an entire civilization
in a month.
Everything around it dies.
(stammers) But I've never seen
anything like this before.
That must be like the granddaddy
of all pestilence demons.
- All right, what do we do?
- Well, it can't be
destroyed, only contained.
- What does that mean?
- Can we talk
about this outside?
- Yeah, let's get outside.
Come on!
(Father Dupre speaks
in a foreign language)
(Maria sobbing)
- The little girls is gonna
die painfully and inevitably,
and when she does,
that demon's gonna leap
into the next host,
the nearest host,
and will slowly kill
everything around it.
Everything and everyone!
- You're not telling
us how to stop it.
- We can't.
- Oh.
- We need to bury it where
no one will ever find it.
- You're saying that we need
to bury that little girl alive?
- [Roshan] Yeah.
- There's gotta
be somethin' else.
- That thing will
sweep this entire area
and kill everything.
Would you rather have that, huh?
- I know!
Trust me.
But we haven't even tried
to think of anything else.
- Since humanity has existed,
we've been dealing
with demons like that.
But he's right!
I mean, there must be somethin'!
We haven't tried anything else!
- The Bible is full
of sacrificial lambs.
Father, you know that!
Besides, I'm sure that girl
doesn't wanna be
the bearer of death
and destruction to everyone
she knows and loves.
- We-
(bag rustling)
We are running out of
places to bury these things.
We need to educate the
masses and reveal the truth.
- Yeah, if you're
into helter skelter.
Can you imagine the
chaos that would bring?
We'd have every Joe Blow
running around blaming demons
for making them do bad things,
instead of their own sick,
fucked up conscience.
- So that's it?
You're just gonna
bury a little girl?
- Yep, we're gonna
bury a little girl.
- [Franklin] A little girl!
- It's not a little girl!
- Fine.
But you're gonna have
to do it without me.
(motorcycle engine rumbling)
(dramatic instrumental music)
(Paul pants heavily)
- [Paul] Not gonna get me!
- Just try and catch up.
- Oh, every time!
(Paul groans)
What are you on, six or seven?
(Paul grunts)
- Thank god!
- Oh, yeah.
Elder Thomas, the Lord's name!
- I'm sorry, Elder Paul!
I'm exhausted.
(Paul pants loudly)
I don't get how Ezekiel
and Matthew get Hawaii,
and we're stuck
here in the desert.
- (scoffs) God does
not give you tasks
that you cannot
handle, Elder Thomas.
- Handle Hawaii.
I need a juice.
- Oh!
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, wait!
I think this is...
This is-
- Hey,
nothin' fancy, I know,
but I bet they
have a nice, cold,
non-caffeinated
beverage in there.
- (scoffs) No!
- Oh!
Really?
- Think it's one of
those naked lady bars?
(clears throat) Well,
gonna have to get some
juice at the next place.
- Nah, if I don't get
something to drink right now,
I might die.
- Well, maybe we could
spread the word of the
Lord to those women?
Yes!
- Yes!
- You'll race me there, though.
Yeah, okay.
- (laughs) Come on!
(bicycle wheels clacking)
(gravel crunching)
(kickstands clattering)
Ah, man.
(Paul giggles)
- [Charlie] Pardon me, boys.
Could you spare a wretched
soul somethin' to eat?
- Yes, sir.
(upbeat rock music)
- Thank you, boys!
Thank ya so much.
God, bless your souls!
- [Paul] May I talk to you
about the gospel
of Jesus Christ?
- Hey, Morrigan, look at this.
These good boys are
spreadin' the word of God.
(upbeat rock music)
- Hmm, hmm.
(Dee grunts)
- Is that so?
- Yes, ma'am.
- Ma'am?
Aren't we proper!
Let me introduce everyone.
Kali, Jezebel,
Izanami, Chantico,
and there are more, but
they are currently working.
- Huh!
Guess I thought it'd
be Candy, or Charity,
or somethin' like that.
- [Jezebel] These
are our given names.
- You worried we bite?
(clacks teeth)
- No.
- Can I interest you guys
in a copy of-
- Oh, we are all
very well versed on all
the scriptures of God.
- Yeah, you all seem
pretty educated.
So why are you all,
you know,
dancing and taking your
clothes off for money?
(all laughing)
- Who said that was wrong?
- Umm....
- If you remember,
Adam and Eve were only
ashamed of their bodies
because they ate of
the forbidden fruit.
- That's true.
- So not being
ashamed of our bodies
would be what God would want.
- Don't mind me, boys.
- Hey, Charlie, where you goin'?
- What's wrong?
- Nothin', just
wanted to help him,
talk to him about
Christ's redemption.
- Redemption is that
man's middle name.
(upbeat rock music)
- Maybe you boys
should be on your way
before the sun goes down?
- Come on, Elder Thomas.
The desert is a pretty
dangerous place at night.
- [Thomas] I hope
our pass cross again.
- I hope for your
sake, they don't.
(upbeat rock music continues)
(door slams shut)
(indistinct chattering)
- [Famine] Ugh, I don't
know which is worse,
my wife or my girlfriend.
- Definitely your girlfriend.
- Oh, yeah?
Why is that?
- Because she's only 13!
(intense whooshing)
(Morrigan screaming)
(uptempo rock music)
(motorcycle engine roaring)
(motorcycle engine rumbling)
(kickstand clanks)
(gravel crunching)
(Franklin softly gasps)
- I'm sorry.
I was just looking
for something to eat.
I'm so hungry it hurts.
- No worries, brother.
As long as this
place serves food,
I'm sure we can
get you something.
I'm sorry.
How did you get here?
I mean, you couldn't
have walked, right?
I mean, are you stuck?
- Mmm, stuck?
Yeah, stuck perhaps.
Can't go anywhere.
Can't eat.
- Hey!
What's your name?
- Charlie.
- Let's say we get you
something to eat, Charlie?
- Okay, sweetie.
I want you to just
stay right here, okay?
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!
You just...
You can't open your
mouth, sweetheart.
You just can't, okay?
(trunk hatch slams shut)
(G groans painfully)
- What's wrong with
your finger, G?
- [G] Nothin', nothin'.
Let's just...
Let's get this done before
it gets any worse, man.
- Yeah.
(Father Dupre speaks
in a foreign language)
- [Father Dupre] Okay?
You're gonna be okay.
(G exhales loudly)
- Seor, seor!
(Maria speaks in a
foreign language)
(Maria gently sobbing)
(G exhales loudly)
(gentle instrumental music)
(engine rumbling)
(Maria sobbing)
(engine roaring)
(gentle instrumental
music continues)
- Do we water it, or...
- It's a cactus, though.
- Yeah, but usually when you
plant something, you water it.
- But it's a cactus.
I don't know.
- Well, I thought
you knew everything?
- I'm not a botanist!
I don't know everything.
I mean, I'd be really
good at Jeopardy,
if all the categories
were about evil shit,
but other than that...
- I'll take ass
raidings by demons
in Zanzibar for
$500, please, Alex.
(Roshan chuckles)
- [Stewart] Seriously?
Seriously?
- Sorry.
- Huh?
- Sorry.
- Fuck!
Look, Franklin headed west.
We gotta go find him.
- Sound like he quit to me.
Maybe we should let him go?
- No one quits.
I mean, I know you haven't been
doing this as long as I have,
but once you're in, you're in.
That's it!
You don't see any
retired demon hunters walking
around out there, period!
You're in!
Fuck!
- I'm sorry.
He's right, though.
They will hunt you down in
your sleep if they have to.
They can smell the
knowledge you have of them,
and they don't take too
kindly to being prayed upon.
Think twice.
They'll get you
one way or another.
I'm sorry.
(suspenseful dramatic music)
- You gonna water it?
(footsteps departing)
- Well, you certainly
have an appetite.
- Yeah, I'm always hungry.
- So how'd you get stuck
all the way out here?
I mean, I'm not even sure
how I found the place.
- [Charlie] I think I made
a wrong turn somewhere.
Oh, no!
I screwed up again.
- Howdy, Franklin.
- You done with your hissy fit?
- Guys.
(dramatic instrumental music)
Guys, guys, guys, guys!
- Hello, boys.
Is there something
I can help you with?
(Roshan stammering)
- What the hell's
wrong with you?
You've never been to
a titty bar before?
- No, it's-
- Yeah, Roshan,
don't be so nervous, yeah?
- Why does he know your-
- No!
Guys, guys, guys, guys, guys!
(female giggling)
- Why are you so scared?
You never accidentally
stumbled into a pit
of an immortal
ancient demon before?
- Fuck me gently!
You're a demon?
- I prefer the term
mortally challenged.
(females laughing)
- Okay.
They're creepy, too.
So what do we do?
- So we're just supposed
to battle it out now?
'Cause I kinda wanna get
some stuff out of the jeep.
(blow thuds)
- You're not going anywhere.
- Sorry!
I'm so sorry I was-
- Quiet!
- Now, what do you say you,
I don't know, let us walk
outta here right now?
- Well, that's sort
of up to the ladies.
That's what they do.
- And what do you do?
- Me?
- Mm-hmm.
- I'm just a barkeep.
- Barkeep?
- Yeah!
(Dee chuckles)
- Yeah.
- It's a bar, ain't it?
I mean, where do you think
all the beer and food come from?
Magic?
- Hey, guys!
You're not gonna believe this.
There was nothing out that
way, so we're back here.
- (laughs nervously) Yeah.
Bikes were a bad
idea in the desert.
- Oh, don't talk like
that, Elder Paul.
I mean, the Lord works
in mysterious ways.
- Yes, he does.
- Eating again, Charlie?
I know!
I'm hungry again, too.
- Oh, no!
There's like cranberry juice
or somethin' all over this.
Good thing my pants are black.
- Sorry about that.
There was a business
man in her earlier,
and he made a hell of a mess.
- Wow!
It sure got busy in here.
Where'd everybody come from?
- Actually, it was
just clearin' out.
- Is it?
- Mm-hmm.
- You know, I hate goodbyes.
Let's just say,
(eerie dramatic music)
(mystical tinkling)
till next time.
(eerie dramatic music continues)
- [Stewart] Okay, let's go.
- Thank you!
Come again.
- Jesus Christ!
What the fuck was that?
- Holy shit!
We really didn't notice that?
- What the hell did
we just walk into?
- (stammering) I don't know.
- What do you mean,
you don't know?
- Well, I didn't know,
not until we walked through
that front door anyway.
- (yells indistinctly) Huh?
You get the bartender!
You get the girls
and the patrons!
- I think pretty
much the whole room.
- Oh, Christ!
- Except for those two
Mormon kids that came in.
They were definitely human.
- Gee, you think?
I was just about
to compliment them
on an amazing cover story.
- Well, you can't
always tell when-
- All right, come on guys.
What were they?
- I'm not positive.
- What?
- Okay.
But whenever a demon tells
you that they are ancient,
it's never a good thing.
You know that.
- We are truly fucked!
- You know, you really
swear a lot for a holy man.
- Well, you know, I ain't
exactly baptizin' babies,
or supervisin' bake sales
(speaks indistinctly)
and old ladies!
- I need to go to the library.
- I need to go to the library.
- What? Now?
- No, "the" library.
You'll see what
I'm talkin' about.
The closest one is about
a day's ride from here.
- All right, let's go!
Let's go!
(Stewart mumbles indistinctly)
(motorcycle engine rumbles)
(car engine roars)
(uptempo rock music)
(motor rumbling)
(gravel crunching)
(motorcycle engine rumbling)
(car doors slamming shut)
- [G] This is it?
- [Stewart] Yeah, I forgot
you've never been
to one of these.
- [G] It's a strange
lookin' library.
- [Stewart] It's
a strange ordeal.
(footsteps pattering)
- Where is this guy?
- I'm right here!
Changed my clothes
and everything.
Put on my outfit.
I have guests here.
Don't usually have a lot of
people hanging around, you know.
I'm pretty sure I
know what you want.
This is an emergency.
Okay, I'm sorry.
We stumbled upon a demon,
and we need your
help identifying it.
- A demon, huh?
That's kinda what I figured
you were doing here.
Let me look around and
see what I have over here.
That ain't it.
(book thuds)
Was it in human
form, this demon?
- Yes.
(book thuds)
And it had a lot of other
creatures there with it.
It said it was ancient.
- Well, that's not good.
(book thuds)
It attacked you, huh?
How did that happen?
How did it attack you?
- The thing is, it didn't.
It let us go.
- It just let a bunch of
you guys walk in the room,
into its den, and turn
around and let you walk out?
- I didn't think
it would either,
but two kids walked in,
and he just let us go.
- Yeah, that's
probably a good thing.
You know, I'm a
dyin' breed, fellas.
Not like a little baby
pops out of the womb,
and suddenly decides
it's gonna grow up,
and be a monk someday. (laughs)
- Don't get me
started on chastity.
I'd be on my 20th kid if it
wasn't for that. (chuckles)
Do you get it?
I'm Catholic.
- You don't say?
- Yeah. (mumbles softly)
- Now, here it is, "The
Ninth Sphere of Angels".
(book thuds)
This is the one.
- Angels?
- You know, most
people picture angels
as chubby, little
cherubs flyin' around
with wings on their back,
and they don't realize
that they don't
really look like that.
The truth is, the little
cherubs have four fuckin' heads,
and only one of 'em is human,
and it ain't a good
lookin' one either.
Ah, the watchers.
Was it a male or a female?
- The one that was doing
all the talking was a woman.
- Is that a good thing?
- Mmm, let's just say,
it's less bad, all right?
Some of these male watchers
kinda figured it was a good idea
to start mating
with some humans.
After that, they created a
race of their own, all right?
And they are dangerous.
They almost destroyed the Earth.
Listen, for a demon to show
compassion for any human being,
it's very rare.
It sounds to me like
what you're dealing with
is a dark angel,
like the red right hand of God.
- Does God really
need a red right hand?
I mean, can't he just-
- You know,
God believes that the only way
to let interaction
have its own way
is to let it occur on its own.
Has any of you
guys ever tried to
please everybody all the time?
- So it's evil like Lucifer.
As Satan, or Hades,
or the devil,
I mean, whatever you
wanna call the guy.
He doesn't make
people do bad things.
He lets them do it on their own,
as we all know that they do.
His only real actual job
is to punish the ones
that do make their own mistakes.
And that's his lot in
life, the poor bastard,
or I should say,
afterlife, right?
Evil souls are
filled with guilt,
so much so that they sink
down to the core of the earth,
burning and torturing
themselves for an eternity.
Good souls are light.
They can do whatever they
want in time and space.
Then there are lost souls,
that, for many reasons,
it's kind of hard to tell
what makes 'em that way.
They're stuck in
the moral gray area,
if there is such a thing,
much like the fallen
angels themselves.
It's the same thing.
They're often surrounded
by these lost souls,
and they just work
off the penance
for those non-mortal sins
that get committed, so.
so you're telling me,
heaven and hell are real?
- You're kidding me, right?
You hunt demons for a living.
- It's easier to
believe in monsters
than it is to believe
in the holy Father.
- Yeah, well, some of
the shit I've seen...
- So what's it doing here?
- They're trying to speed
along the judgment process.
They feel that
it's wrong to wait.
- Wait for what?
- Wait for the
evil souls to die.
Why should they get
to remain on earth?
All they wanna do is cause pain
and misery on the innocent.
The angels wanna see
'em all punished.
They can see right through
all of your souls, okay?
They can see all of your sins,
every single one
of yous, even mine,
but they can't
kill a good person.
It's kind of inherent in them.
They're still more angel than
they are demon, actually.
- So you're saying, innocent
souls are their kryptonite?
- So they walk the
earth in perpetuity
slaughtering the
souls of the wicked.
- Well, sounds like a
pretty good deal to me.
Maybe I should send em a
thank you card, flowers,
maybe a goat to sacrifice.
- No, no, no, no, no.
She's still an evil spirit,
and she does not get to decide
when it's your time to go.
- They're killing bad people.
Who cares?
- People change.
People can repent, right?
And they can find redemption.
It's not her place to judge.
Let me ask you,
are you a sinner?
Have you sinned, eh?
But are you, perfect?
Do you deserve the
right to die right now
before you can make amends?
I thought so.
- You know, we hunt demons.
That's what we do, period.
- We're not bad people, so
they can't harm us anyway!
- G!
- How do we stop it?
- Well, that depends
on what they look like.
- Kinda hot.
- I didn't mean like that.
I mean, like where do they
look like they're from?
Like when the angels
originally fell,
they spread across the world
and into every single culture.
They remain there,
unless, for whatever reason,
that culture abandons them.
They're known to wander
around, and so...
I mean, where did this one
look like she came from?
- There were actually
several of them,
and they looked like
they came from all over,
different parts of the globe.
- So what you're telling me
is that there are
multiple dark angels
altogether in one place?
- Is that bad?
- I don't know.
(laughs) I don't know.
You know what?
I don't know if I wanna know.
- My name is (speaks
indistinctly).
- Be right back, boys,
one way or the other.
- Well, that's what I wanna
talk to you about.
- You boys wanna play a game?
- Oh, yes!
That'd be awesome!
- [Female] What's
your poison, my lady?
Used to be anything
and everything,
and I'd do anything for it, too.
I pawned my grandmother's ring
just so I'd have
enough to get high.
It's one of the last things
I remember, honestly.
Wait a minute!
Where's my baby?
My baby!
Oh, god!
I got high,
and she's blue!
Why is she blue?
- We all have our demons.
I was a drunk.
I mean, seven nights a week,
drink till ya black
out every night drunk.
My family was pinchin'
pennies to survive,
and I was drinkin' away anything
I could get my hands on.
I drove home drunk,
like I always do.
Only this time,
I fell asleep in the garage
with the car running,
and my family was
inside sleeping.
I killed them all,
my wife, my three sons,
my little baby girl.
She had hazel eyes,
just like an angel.
- Oh, my god!
How did you go on?
- I didn't.
I died that night in the garage.
What's the last thing
you remember, Veronica,
before you got here?
(dramatic orchestral music)
- Is this hell?
- Hell is much worse.
Souls wallow in the guilt
and pain they caused
for all eternity.
- So where am I?
- Think of this as heaven's DMV.
- Purgatory?
How long am I here for?
- Till whenever.
- I know, it's empty,
and it'll always be empty.
Plus, it's strange
not to have a drink
in front of people at a bar.
You don't wanna spook the prey.
(indistinct chattering)
(angelic orchestral music)
(footsteps pattering)
- I'm glad your
friends are leavin'.
'Bout time I get this robe off.
Where the hell is the pages?
(pages rustling)
Oh, lordy!
Oh, here it is.
No, no, no, don't bother, man.
Listen, you know what?
Good luck to ya.
You're gonna need it.
Okay?
- Thank you.
- Don't buy anything from
someone who's out of breath.
- Okay.
- I'll see ya, young man.
- Yes, sir.
(pages rustling)
- Guys, I don't know about this.
- [Stewart] You know what?
We have to do it.
- Stewart's right.
I mean, they're still demons,
and they're huntin' mankind.
- Yeah, the piece of
shit part of mankind.
- Yeah, but come on!
People change.
They repent.
They ask for forgiveness.
God forgives them.
- Who says?
What part of what you just heard
makes you think there's any
other option besides up or down?
- Well, there's purgatory.
- Perhaps, that
sounds wonderful.
We should buy a fuckin'
time share there!
- Look, G, I don't know
what your concerns are,
your issues are.
It doesn't matter
what you've done.
But if you truly, truly repent,
the Lord will forgive you!
It's okay!
- Well, I'm glad you
believe that, Father,
but I have a strange feeling
it all stays on our
permanent record.
- You know, G, maybe he's right.
Maybe he's right.
- Then it's our place
to vanquish the demons.
- I mean, look, sometimes
the most awful human beings
can change their life, and
do something good with it.
I mean...
- What if they kill the
guy who cures cancer?
- Really?
You know what?
Count me out!
I'm not risking my fuckin'
neck for a bunch of scumbags
that I would
happily kill myself!
Fuck that!
(intense high pitched ringing)
(rapid gunshots firing)
Contact right, contact right!
(rapid gunshots continue firing)
Cover!
- Cover, cover!
Go!
(rapid gunshots firing)
(rapid gunshots continue firing)
- [G] Everybody okay?
Anybody hit?
- No, Top, we're good.
- Goddamn shithole!
Why are we riskin' our necks
for people that
don't wanna be saved?
- You know, sometimes
people that need to be saved
just don't know it.
- Are you willing to
risk your life for it?
- No, I risk my
life for you guys.
If something happened
because I wasn't here, pfft.
How are we doin' on ammo?
(soldiers yelling indistinctly)
- I'm low.
- Want me to get it, Top?
- No, I got it.
(rapid gunshots firing)
(G exhales loudly)
Shit!
- [Roshan] See,
that's interesting,
because it a
combination of both.
(indistinct chattering
in the background)
(dramatic instrumental music)
- Change of heart?
- Somethin' like that.
- That makes sense.
Roshan thinks he's
got something.
- I do.
- Okay, how do we destroy him?
- We can't.
- All right.
How do we banish him?
- We can't.
- Cool story, bro.
Yeah, I really think
this might be a bad idea.
- No, we can immobilize them.
- [G] Okay, I'm interested.
- Okay, they're immortal, right?
But they're still
physical beings.
So all we have to do is,
chop them up into pieces,
and then bury
everything separately.
(G chuckles)
- Uh-huh.
- That's all?
That's all we gotta do?
Take a supernatural being
that's older than time,
and cut it up with a
steak knife, until what,
it rips out our spine and
makes a bow out of it?
- No, see, they can't kill us!
We're not like serial killers
or anything like that.
We're good people, right?
Now, the book doesn't say,
you know, how strong
they are specifically.
You know, and they're
certainly unique,
but it's not that different
from what we usually do.
- Right.
- I think we got this.
- You know, maybe we can...
Maybe we can surround the club,
you know, and draw them out?
- Well, what about all
the lost souls in the bar?
I mean, there was at
least a dozen of 'em.
- Oh, no, no, they
can't harm us at all.
They're like worker bees.
In fact, I'm not even sure
they're physical at
this point in time.
- Okay.
Okay, this might work.
- Yeah.
- Excellent!
Now we're all happy
families again,
I actually have an idea.
Who wants a confession?
(G blows raspberry)
- Nope!
- Mm-mmm.
- It couldn't hurt
anything, right?
(book thuds)
- Hell yeah!
(upbeat rock music)
(Stewart speaks indistinctly)
(G groans)
- There is is, brother.
- Yeah.
- [G] Father?
- Thanks.
- That's nice.
(gun clanks)
(guns clicking)
- Dude, a grenade?
- He said, "In pieces".
(gun clatters)
(gloves rustling)
(hands thudding)
(knuckles cracking)
- You know what?
Holy water literally
doesn't work on anything.
I mean, anything.
(blade clanking)
- [Franklin] Yeah,
well, it's not the
holy water that doesn't work,
it's the faith that wavered.
- Something tells me, the Lord
will be with us this time.
- You think bullet will work?
- Hell, a shotgun blast to the
face slows most things down.
Let's go, (speaks indistinctly).
(engine rumbling)
(car doors slamming shut)
(intense dramatic music)
(female screams in the distance)
(voices howling in the distance)
Yep!
(G exhales loudly)
- So you think they're
going to come out?
- I don't know,
but we can't be
good for business
standing around
out here like this.
- Well, I hope they do,
'cause when it comes to waitin',
time is definitely on our side.
- Look, all the books say,
they're supposed to be
out roaming the earth
looking for souls to reap.
I have no idea why
they're all gathered here
staying in one place.
- Yeah, well, maybe we're
about to stop something
more serious from
happenin' here.
- [G] Yeah, I'm startin'
to agree with you on that.
- Oh, shit!
Why are the Mormon
kids still here?
- Why are the Mormon
kids still here?
I mean, where else have
they gotta go, huh?
You want us to take those bikes
and go back to where
we just came from, huh?
(indistinct chattering)
- Jezebel.
- I know.
(suspenseful dramatic music)
(Jezebel cracks knuckles)
- I'll take care of it!
- Dee?
(door creaks open)
(door slams shut)
- [Dee] Yeah, Jez?
- Why don't you show the
boys our shed in the back?
- (chuckles) Absolutely.
(continues chuckling) Okay.
Hey, fellas, come with me.
You're in for a big treat here.
You're gonna see the
priceless antiquities
that the ladies have collected
over the years. (chuckles)
Come on.
- Stay seated, Charlie!
They had their chance.
(suspenseful dramatic music)
(electricity whirring)
(intense whooshing)
(mystical chiming)
- Something I can help you with?
(intense whooshing)
We've been roaming this world
since before your kind
could start a fire.
You really think you
can stand against us?
Do you really think we haven't
dealt with hunters before?
- [Franklin] Fuck you!
(Franklin groans)
(Kali laughs)
(explosions booming)
(rapid gunfire blasting)
- Come on, ya bitch!
(gunshots blasting)
(electricity whooshing)
(disembodied screaming)
(electricity crackling)
(explosion booming)
(glasses rattling)
(boys gasping)
- Sounds like
something just blew up.
- That's just the military.
They kinda test new ordinance
out here all the time, you know?
- That sounded super close!
- Yeah, (laughs) I
wouldn't worry about that.
All the time it happens.
You know what?
But you're gonna love this.
Wait till you see this gold
violin that Jezebel has.
Now, Paganini used this.
He used to practice on it.
- Paganini?
- Wait till you see this.
- Paganini.
(suspenseful dramatic music)
- All right.
- Oh, this is gross!
- Okay, keep all
the pieces separate.
Keep 'em all separate.
Hurry!
(Roshan groans)
Get 'em all separate.
(male groans)
(suspenseful dramatic
music continues)
- Well, we got about a
hundred more pieces like this
where they came from.
- Why are you doing this?
You had a chance to walk away.
- Because that's what we do.
We're here to protect mankind
from creatures and demons
that haunt this earth.
- [Izanami] Well, that's funny.
- Why is that?
- Because you're not that
different from us after all.
- (sighs loudly)
Don't know about that.
See, it's not your have
place to judge, is it?
- Are you sure about that?
- Absolutely.
- 'Cause you believe in it,
or because you're
counting on it?
- Father, this place is
full of second chances.
Why, look at Charlie here.
Charlie, do you even
remember what you did?
Charles was quite the
military man back in the day.
Maybe you can appreciate
that, Sergeant Gerard.
- Turns out, just
following orders
isn't a good enough excuse.
- You know what?
This ends and it ends now.
- Such a rush to
meet your maker.
Are you sure it's him?
You'll see when it's
all said and done.
- We know you can't kill us.
We're good people.
- Then you should have no
problem facing your demons then.
(intense dramatic music)
(electricity whirring)
(mystical chiming)
(intense dramatic music)
(blows thudding)
(both grunting)
- I guess you demons
have a lot of time to
practice this, huh?
- (laughs) We invented it.
(intense dramatic
music continues)
(footsteps pattering)
(Roshan whispers indistinctly)
(intense dramatic
music continues)
(door handle rattles)
(intense dramatic
music continues)
(Roshan pants heavily)
(lighter flicking)
- Come on, come on!
(intense eerie music)
(Roshan groans)
(continues groaning)
(intense eerie music)
(car door clatters open)
(Roshan mumbles)
(Roshan screams)
(body thuds)
(air whooshing)
(Roshan grunts)
(suspenseful dramatic music)
(intense screeching)
(Roshan groans painfully)
(intense screeching continues)
Oh!
- [Morrigan] You are
foolishly overconfident.
(Morrigan laughs maniacally)
(intense eerie music)
(blow thuds)
(Roshan groans)
(footsteps pattering)
(blow thuds)
(Roshan groans)
(blow thuds)
(Roshan grunts loudly)
- Wait a minute!
Wait, no!
(body thuds)
(Roshan pants heavily)
You can't kill me.
I'm a good person.
You can't kill me.
- You're right,
I can't kill you.
I can torture you.
I mean, you don't need
your arms, do you?
(Roshan groans painfully)
You don't need your eyes.
- I need my eyes!
I need my eyes, please!
Don't!
Don't take my eyes!
- You need your eyes?
- I do! (pants heavily)
(intense screeching)
Ow!
(Roshan groans)
(eerie suspenseful music)
- Franklin, Franklin,
what are you doing here?
(intense whooshing)
- It's my job.
I protect the innocent.
- Hmm, isn't it a
little late for that?
(blow thuds)
(intense dramatic music)
(Sekhmet laughs)
(blow whooshing)
(electricity crackling)
(mystical chiming)
(Franklin groans)
(intense whooshing)
Get back up.
(intense whooshing)
(blow thuds)
(eerie suspenseful music)
(gun clatters)
(eerie suspenseful
music continues)
- (laughs) You got him!
(video game plays in background)
(sighs) Frankie, I
gotta go help your
grandmother out
for a few minutes.
Can you please walk
your sister home
from her dance class at six?
- Yeah, Mom, sure.
- Yeah?
All right, I'm serious.
I'm counting on you.
- All right, I got it!
Don't worry, I got it.
- All right.
(taps couch)
Love you, baby.
I'll be back as fast as I can.
(intense whooshing)
(Franklin breathes shakily)
- You wanna protect people?
Then what happened
that day, Frankie?
(Franklin continues
breathing shakily)
(intense dramatic music)
- Julie?
Where are you?
Frankie, where's Julie?
(door clatters)
(intense rumbling)
(mystical chiming)
(electricity whirring)
(body thuds)
(Franklin groans)
(eerie suspenseful music)
(intense whooshing)
(body thuds)
(intense dramatic music)
(electricity sizzling)
(Franklin pants heavily)
(intense screeching)
(mystical chiming)
(electricity whirring)
- [Franklin] No!
(Franklin screaming)
(somber instrumental music)
Get out!
(Franklin screaming)
(body thuds)
(Franklin gently sobbing)
(Father Dupre grunts)
(snake hissing)
(feet shuffling)
(Father Dupre pants heavily)
- What?
(Father Dupre
whispers indistinctly)
(intense screeching)
(Father Dupre pants heavily)
(intense screeching)
(dramatic suspenseful music)
- Forgive me, Father,
for I have sinned.
(electricity whirring)
(intense eerie music)
It's been 100,000 years
since my last confession.
- It's never too late
to confess to the Lord.
(Father Dupre grunts)
(sword clanks)
Stop this madness!
- [Chantico] Oh, no, a knife?
I hear hammers
work just as well.
(lighter flicking)
- [Parishioner] Forgive me,
Father, for I have sinned.
I fear I have done an
egregious act against the Lord,
one for which I feel I
can never be forgiven.
- Please take a seat, son.
(Parishioner sighs)
Tell me your sins,
and the Lord will forgive
those who truly, truly repent.
- [Parishioner] My
wife is cheating on me
with my closest friend.
- I am sorry, son.
Sometimes life just-
- So I killed him.
I fucking killed him.
I went into work early,
and took a hammer,
and bashed in his
fucking skull. (laughs)
Father, do you think the
Lord can still forgive me?
I don't wanna go to hell.
I'm so sorry.
I'm so, so, so sorry.
I just felt so betrayed.
(Parishioner sobs)
- The Lord will forgive those
who are truly, truly
sorry and repent,
for that is what is written.
(Parishioner breathes heavily)
- [Parishioner] Thank you.
Thank you, Father.
I am so sorry.
I'm so sorry.
I just didn't wanna go to hell.
(laughs) Thank you, Father.
(dramatic instrumental music)
(fingers tapping)
(Parishioner pants heavily)
(blow thuds)
(blood squelching)
(hammer clatters)
(Father Dupre breathes shakily)
- I thought he would
turn himself in.
I thought he was truly sorry.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
I didn't realize...
I didn't realize it,
I'd give him a green light
to kill his entire family.
(Father Dupre mumbles)
(breathes shakily)
I didn't know.
I didn't know, I didn't know!
- Yet, still to this day, you
preach forgiveness, Father.
(body thuds)
(Father Dupre groans)
(dramatic instrumental music)
(Father Dupre yells
out painfully)
- It's true!
(bone cracking)
(Father Dupre screams)
I thought he forgives
all who repent?
- Forgiveness is not the
same thing as acceptance!
(bone cracking)
(Father Dupre screams)
You and only you are responsible
for your final destination.
- Yeah! (pants heavily)
(air whooshing)
(blows thudding)
- [Izanami] Something
on your mind, Stewart?
- You should know, huh?
Isn't that what you demons do?
- Amuse me.
I live for what you die for.
(intense whooshing)
- Hey, Marie.
What's going on?
Where's the baby?
Fuck you!
Fuck you!
(somber instrumental music)
(door creaks open)
(intense rumbling)
(G groans)
(object clatters)
(intense dramatic music)
- Something's weighing
on your soul, Sergeant.
I could smell it
all the way outside.
- Yeah, well, I knew the
deal when I came back here,
but you already know that.
You already know everything.
- But do you?
- [Soldier] How
we doin' on ammo?
- I'm low!
- I'm low.
- Want me to get it, Top?
- No, I got it.
(intense dramatic music)
(door slams shut)
(gravel crunching)
No, no, no, no, no, no!
(intense dramatic
music continues)
Don't do it, kid!
Don't do it, kid!
Jesus!
(intense ringing)
I had to make a choice.
- Your men or the child.
- I had to make a choice.
I-
- I know.
I know.
(intense whooshing)
- No, no, no, no, no, no!
(gun cocks)
Don't do it, kid!
(dramatic instrumental music)
No, don't do it!
(gunshot firing)
(explosion booming)
(intense ringing)
(dramatic instrumental music)
I chose my brothers.
We lost so many,
but I'm still here,
and I gotta live with
that every single day.
So just do it!
Kill me!
Come on, rip my heart out,
send me straight to hell!
Do what you do.
What, you want me
to do it for ya?
(gun clatters)
- I can't!
You didn't do anything wrong.
You're not the one
that killed that kid.
That sin is on whoever
used him as a weapon.
Some things aren't sins,
even when you want them to be.
- What are you doing?
I thought...
- I can't kill you, Sergeant.
And this is what
you came for, right?
So do it.
I'm glad your conscious
is exonerated, Gerard,
but you're a hunter.
Didn't you come for a prize?
- No.
- No?
That's not my sister
in pieces over there?
- I was just...
You guys kill people!
- Yeah, bad people!
Is that any different
than banishing any
other kind of evil?
Oh, yeah, that plague demon,
that's some dark shit.
Be glad it wasn't
Famine you touched.
You know, we're not that
different you and I.
We're both just sending things
to hell where they belong.
- Yeah, what about redemption?
- There are some sins
that are so heavy
nothing can stop the souls
from sinking to
the depths of hell.
Nothing!
You think you can drive a
busload of kids off a cliff,
and just be really sorry?
You know, Hitler begged
God for forgiveness, too.
He's still in hell.
- Yeah, but what about-
(Jezebel scoffs)
- He shows you the way.
He doesn't decide where you go.
Only you do.
Speaking of which,
I hope your friends
walked in here
with as clean a conscience.
- I blame myself
for it every day.
It's all my fault.
I should have been
there for her!
I'm so sorry, Julie.
I'm sorry.
- Don't apologize to me.
(Franklin gently sobbing)
- Jules.
I'm so sorry I
wasn't there for you.
I'm so sorry.
- It's okay.
I know, I forget
things all the time.
- But what happened
to you was so awful.
- Julie, there's some nice
boys out back with Dee.
I think they're looking
at our old trinkets.
- Jules.
(Franklin continues
gently sobbing)
I took care of Buttons for ya.
Oh, Jules.
- [Sekhmet] She doesn't
know what happened that day,
and I'd like to
keep it that way.
- Is she stuck
here because of me?
- She'll be fine.
She's free to wander the
earth wherever she may want.
Though, the young often do not
understand what has happened.
- So she's okay?
- It is hard for anyone
that young to carry sin.
She is freer than
most will ever be.
She will grow up in
time, in a sense.
It will just take a lot
longer, like a long dream.
- Oh, Father Dupree,
have you truly
succumbed to hiding,
or are you preparing
to take my confession?
- I didn't know!
(grunts) I didn't know.
I lived my whole life as a lie.
I have my blood in my hands.
(electronic whirring)
(Father Dupree gasps)
(intense whooshing)
(body thuds)
(Father Dupree groans)
(Father Dupree pants heavily)
(groans loudly and coughs)
(panting heavily increasing)
(Father Dupree breathes shakily)
- [Chantico] How does it feel?
- The Lord knows my soul.
(intense whooshing)
(Father Dupree
grunting painfully)
Yeah, I know it hurts.
Does it feel like a dozen
or more hammer blows
about the head and face?
(Father Dupree gasping)
(intense dramatic music)
(Father Dupree yelling)
- Jesus, forgive me!
(Chantico laughs)
- [Chantico] I'm sorry,
he's not here right now.
It's just us girls.
- [Father Dupre] (groaning
painfully) Please!
(continues groaning painfully)
- Father Dupree,
don't get too comfortable.
That was just the first one.
He did murder five people,
and you're gonna feel each one.
(screaming in the distance)
- Is it-
- Sounds like
someone's screamin'
- Huh?
- Should we...
Let's go check it out?
- No, I didn't hear nothin'.
(gravel crunching)
What?
(painful screaming
in the distance)
Oh! (laughs)
Yeah, you know what that is?
That sounds almost human,
but those are coyotes.
They sound hauntin' yippin'.
You know, they do that cry.
- Yeah, I'd say!
- That's all it is,
it's some coyotes.
- Sounds like a guy
gettin' beat to death.
(all laughing)
- Yeah-huh.
- Is that a pimp cup?
- No, what it is-
- Let's drink out of it.
- That's a very sacred
object that one.
(both boys laughing)
- Hand me that.
Let me see.
Oh!
- Wow!
Whoa, look at these scrolls!
These are old!
- Oh, it was some job switchin'
them out, let me tell you.
- Yeah?
- Mm-hmm.
- Okay, are these movie props?
I'm half expecting to find
the Ark of the Covenant
in here. (laughs)
- No, that's in Nova
Scotia, (mumbles).
(all laughing)
- Wow!
- Look at this.
- I know!
These are cool!
- Look at, look at.
- [Dee] I'll be right
back, gentlemen.
I'll be right back, okay?
- This sharp?
Okay.
- Yeah, there's...
I'll be right back.
(spring clanging)
- Ow!
- Look at this.
Poke me.
(both laughing)
This is cool.
- Let me see this.
(Thomas laughs)
- Oh, there's another one!
(blows thudding)
- [Stewart] Ow!
(dramatic orchestral music)
(blade whooshing)
(both grunting)
(blow thuds)
(Stewart groans)
(skin squelching)
(suspenseful dramatic music)
(blows thudding)
(Izanami groans)
- Really?
(electricity whooshing)
I'm sorry to inform
you, Stewart,
but I'm not so easy to kill,
unlike other people.
(intense whooshing)
(body thuds)
(intense whooshing)
(suspenseful dramatic music)
(Stewart pants heavily)
What did you do, Stewart?
- [Stewart] What
the fuck did you do?
You fuckin' evil bitch,
what the fuck did you do?
- He wouldn't stop crying.
- I didn't do anything,
at least I don't think I did.
You wanted him to
stop crying, huh?
- For once,
- Huh?
- I just wanted him
- For once?
- to be quiet!
- Huh?
That's why you wanted
him to be quiet?
- Are you sure?
- You wanted him to be quiet!
(wife yells indistinctly)
- I'm not-
(body thuds)
- I don't know.
Get up!
Get up!
Get up.
(object clatters)
(Stewart gently sobs)
Okay, all right.
(melancholic piano music)
I don't know.
- And how do you think
your friends will fare?
You walk them right
into the demon pit,
never asked if there was
darkness in their souls.
- They're good people!
They're helping humanity.
- We're protecting humanity.
Can't you see?
(Roshan groans)
- Please, please let me go.
I have so many more
people I wanna help.
(intense whooshing)
(electricity whirring)
(body thuds)
(Roshan yells out painfully)
- Okay, you can go.
- What?
- I just had to stall
you for a little while.
- Are you serious?
- You want me to change my mind?
- No, no!
(Roshan groans)
(Morrigan laughs maniacally)
(metal clangs)
- Hey, buddy.
What happened to you?
Looks like you got a
pretty bad cut there.
There.
Let me take a look.
- No, no, no, no, no, no!
Keep away!
If he so much as puts a finger
on you, you will starve.
You understand that?
No matter how much you eat,
your skin will shrivel,
your body will eat itself,
but you won't die.
You'll remain a crumbled
mess of just flesh
and dust until the next
poor creature comes along,
and makes the mistake
of touchin' you,
and then you'll get
the caress of death.
Now, let's get outta here.
Come on, come on.
(prisoner growling)
(prisoner pants heavily)
(indistinct chattering)
- Guess we're not
conquering the demons.
- I think in many
ways, we just did.
Where's Roshan, Dupree?
- Okay, come on.
(Roshan groans painfully)
There he is.
Hey, fellas!
Your boy needs some help here.
He's gonna blow.
(stomach growling loudly)
- You okay?
(Roshan gagging)
- What the hell, bro?
- Is everybody okay?
- Dupree is still missin'.
(Roshan breathes heavily)
Where is he?
(suspenseful dramatic music)
(body thuds)
What the hell's wrong with him?
What'd you do?
- He's just got a
splitting headache.
He'll be fine.
He might need some
counseling, though.
Maybe a few Hail
Mary's. (laughs)
Give him a minute, though.
He just died five times.
- [G] What? Why?
- He didn't do anything
bad to go to hell.
He just, you know, needed to
learn an important lesson.
(Father Dupree
shuddering loudly)
- Yeah.
The path to
enlightenment is painful.
- See, I probably saved his
soul from running up here.
You good, Frankie?
(dramatic instrumental music)
- He'll be fine.
Is everyone going to be fine?
(Izanami sighs loudly)
(body parts thudding)
- Well, I hope you guys
all like jigsaw puzzles.
(body parts squelching)
(Roshan groans)
- Still better than the time
I was thrown from a tower,
and eaten by dogs.
I've been roaming
for a very long time.
- You still owe me
for what I had to do to
find all those pieces.
- A Pagan priest released
famine onto my land,
and then they blamed me,
accused me of witchcraft.
Talk about projection.
Unfortunately, history
is written by men
with their flaws and
their narratives.
- Hey, you want help with that?
- It's fine.
It's not like you know what
you're looking at anyway.
- Well, yeah, that's true.
- So are we free to go?
- You're not gonna
punish us more for-
- You meant well,
unlike others who have tried.
- Gentlemen, I think
you should take
the ladies' generous
offer to go.
- Stewart, you ready to go?
- You can leave
here now, Stewart.
Accidentally killing someone
is not gonna send you to hell.
It's whether or not
you had the intent.
- Look, what if it
was done on purpose?
- But it wasn't.
Well, let's just
leave it at that.
- Honestly, I'd have thrown
her through the wall,
but I don't have a
soul to worry about.
- What demons possessed her?
I mean, this whole
journey started
on me trying to find out
what kinda evil soul-
- Stewart,
that wasn't a demon.
That was just her.
Don't worry, that bitch
is burning in hell.
There's no insanity
defense in the afterlife.
Psychos know the difference
between wrong and right.
They just don't care.
- Keep up the good work.
We'll hold it down here.
- Hey, wait, wait, wait!
Why are all of you in one
place at the same time?
- You really wanna know?
- "Better the devil
you know", they say.
- War is coming.
- But war happens all the time.
What do you mean?
- No, war,
one of the four horsemen
of the apocalypse,
he's coming for Famine.
He's in the back room.
- I hope you didn't touch him.
- No, (stammers) I
didn't touch him.
Did you...
You mean, the four
horsemen of the apocalypse?
- Well, the method of
transportation isn't the issue.
And I have to admit, that
the translation is a bit off,
but, yes, plague,
famine, war, and death,
but death of everything.
Now, during your journey, if
you should come across war,
I beg you, please don't engage.
- Why not?
- Because anyone who kills
him, he will take his body.
So you should leave
that to the ladies.
- Yeah, it's a good idea.
- Yeah.
- You all right?
- Yeah, I'm good.
- Hey, Stewart?
- Yeah?
- We'll catch you next time.
- All right.
(bicycles clattering)
- Wow, that sure was fun!
- (laughs) I know!
And Julie was so sweet.
- She was.
- Yeah.
- [G] Hey, fellas,
you need a lift?
Might be a little tight,
but I think we can
fit you in the back.
- [Jezebel] Boys, if you
go a mile up the road,
you'll see a sheriff's station.
Officer Dan will escort
you safely out of the area.
- Okay, thank you.
- Goodbye!
Goodbye!
- Okay, so what's their deal?
- They're human.
I'm sorry to disappoint you.
- I'm not disappointed.
It's just, I'm-
- Just as there are sinners
there are saints.
- [Franklin] So the
Mormons got it right?
- (scoffs) Organized religion
has nothing to do with it.
I swear, you people make
things more complicated
than it needs to be.
Just Remember the Golden Rule.
- Wait, so it's
really that simple,
just do unto others?
- Yes, it's really that simple.
Don't do anything to someone
you wouldn't want
done to yourself.
- You know, I get
so many questions-
- No!
Every time we try to explain
things to you, you screw it up.
(intense rumbling)
I believe you'd
like to return that.
- She's okay?
- I pulled a favor
for my brother.
You're lucky, I'm his favorite.
He wants to know how the hell
you planted that
Jumpin' Cholla bush?
- (chuckles) Well,
it wasn't easy,
but that was the point, right?
- Just don't tell
the Catholic senorita
that Satan dropped
off her little girl.
She thinks he was a
friendly stranger.
They always do.
And for what it's worth,
you did the right thing.
The last time it got out, it
killed a third of the world.
It came at a cost, though.
I had to offer it a
more appetizing host.
We'll deal with that later.
- Well, thank you.
Thank you very much.
- Now, go be good!
I'd hate to see you back here.
- What was that?
Well, we got a stop to make.
- I need to talk to my mother.
- We all got a lot to
talk about, brother.
- Popobawa
- Poga-what?
- The ass raping
demon from Zanzibar.
- No, wait!
- That's real.
- I was only jokin' about that!
- No, it's real.
- No, I mean-
- No, it's not real.
You've gotta be kidding me.
- I'm never going
to Zanzibar ever!
- [G] How long you been
lookin' at that shit?
(engines rumbling)
(upbeat rock music)
(engine roaring)
(upbeat rock music continues)
- No fuckin' way!
- Not today, Satan.
Not today.
- It's a good thing Franklin
didn't try to pick him up.
- He would never
fit on his bike.
You see the size of him?
- Actually, that was war.
- That was war,
and he's coming to get us all.
- Yep.
(intense dramatic music)
(suspenseful dramatic music)