Dindin (2024) Movie Script
[dramatic music]
[horn honking]
[soft clinking]
[water gently splashing]
[thunder rumbling]
[rain splattering]
[wind whistling]
[thunder loudly rumbling]
[thunder loudly rumbling]
-[woman 1] Yeah, it's not.
-[man 1] They are. They're... No, the chickens are.
[man 2 stutters] We
only buy grass fed beef.
-[man 1] That's great. That's really great.
-[woman 2] It is.
-[man 2] Yeah.
-[Woman 1] Not for the beef.
[woman 2 laughs]
-[man 2] What?
What did you say?
-[Woman 1] I said,
"Not for the beef, it isn't great."
[man 2] All right.
But I mean...
-[man 1] Um, actually,
-it is great.
-[Woman 1] Uh, yeah?
-[man 1] Actually, is.
-[man 2] Or, well, it's better.
-Well, he means... [sighs] you know what he means.
-[woman 1] Um...
[man 1] You got a grass-fed beef animal...
[Darlene] A cow!
-[Man 2] Darlene!
-[man 1] A grass-fed cow.
-Or steer.
I think it's steer. Cows
give milk, don't they?
[man 2] Cows can be beef.
[man 1] Cows are beef by definition.
-[Darlene] Cows are cows by definition.
-You know what he means.
[man 2] Uh...
-[man 1] Beef comes from cow. Beef is meat from a cow.
-That's its definition.
-But I think beef might just come from steers.
-[man 2] No, Emily.
-No?
[man 1] The point is, uh,
wherever the beef came from...
-[Darlene] An animal. A living, alive, feeling animal.
-Well...
[man 1] Whichever animal that was...
-[man 2] Right,
-it doesn't matter. Right.
-[Darlene] It matters to the animal.
[Darlene] It would matter
if the animal were human.
-[Pierre] Darlene.
-[Darlene] Pierre.
-Humans are animals.
-[Pierre] Am I?
[man 1] Wh... what matters
is if the animal is grass fed.
If the nonhuman animal
is grass fed, free range,
open... whatever. Uh,
had other animal friends,
then it had a good time when
I... uh, it, it had a good life.
-No... Yes.
-[Man 1] And that is the point.
-That's right. It is.
-[Pierre] Exactly. Exactly.
-[Darlene] It is? The point of our lives...
-Yes.
- is to have a good time?
-[man 1] Uh, yeah, actually it is. You think so, too.
-[Darlene] Oh... oh!
-[man 1 chuckles] You do, you do too.
-[Pierre] Sure. Quality of life. That's the point.
-[Darlene grunts]
-Absolutely.
-[Pierre] A good quality life.
Absolutely!
-[Thunder rumbles]
-Like this.
-[Man 1] Like this.
Like a nice home-cooked meal
with good food, good people.
-This is what it's all about.
-[Darlene] Wow.
-This is it, right here? We've got it?
-[man 1] This is it.
-Knock on wood.
-Yeah, we got it pretty good.
Knock on wood. [Knocks
table and chuckles] -[chuckles]
Pierre.
[laughs] Jesus.
More wine?
-[Man 1] That's all I'm saying.
-Of course. Of course.
-[Man 1] Okay.
[wine sloshing]
-[glass clinks]
-[Darlene] Sorry. No, sorry...
-[man 1] Me, too.
but you wouldn't mind
being murdered tomorrow?
-[laughs] Darlene!
-Or how about tonight even?
I mean, if you've served
your purpose on earth,
you've reached your pinnacle,
right? You've had a good time.
-Money, friends, steak, grass-fed steak.
-This is brisket.
-[man 1] Okay. I had it good.
-You had it good. So if your time is up...
-[man 1] I had it good until this conversation started.
-[laughter]
[mumbles] -See, it's not the same
thing what you're saying, Darlene.
-Why not? Right.
-[Pierre] You know why not. A cow is not a human being.
-So that's why it's not the same.
-Well, that's why a cow
and a human are not the same.
That's not why it's not the same
-to murder both of them.
-[Pierre scoffs]
[laughs] It's not murder!
-It's not?
-It is not the same!
You murdered two
different things. It's different...
So if you murdered two different people?
-[Pierre] What?
-You murdered two people.
They're different from each other, right?
You don't murder the same person twice.
-You murdered this one, and that one.
-What?
[Darlene] Rich one, poor
one, woman one, man...
-Black one, white one.
-Sane one, crazy one.
Yeah, sane... fine, sane one, crazy one.
You're saying we should
treat that murder differently?
W... we should call murder by some
other name based on the victim?
[Emily] No one is murdering
anyone. [Laughing] Oh, my God!
Well...
-Oh!
-That is not murder, Darlene.
-[Darlene] Of course it is.
-It is not the same.
-[Darlene] Of course it is.
-Well, now we're just talking in circles.
No. Circles would imply some
movement. I'm not moving. I'm right.
-Well, I feel I'm right.
-Oh, I don't feel I'm right.
-I am right.
-Anyway, he didn't murder it.
-He didn't murder anything.
-Okay.
Okay!
He just paid someone to do it for him.
Oh!
-[Emily] Oh, well, everyone does that.
-No.
-Yes, everyone. Everyone. Everyone pays taxes.
And that pays for guns.
So, police officers have guns,
so police officers will kill criminals.
That is not why I pay taxes.
[laughter] -[Emily] But
that's what they go for.
Even then. Even if I
want the criminal dead,
even if I fund his murder, I
don't think I would eat him.
-I would not eat the dead criminals, dead bodies.
-You might.
-No.
-[Laughs]
[Pierre] You would if you had to.
I don't think so, Pierre.
[Emily] Have you ever read Robinson Crusoe?
-[Pierre] What?
-[Emily] What if you were stuck on a desert island?
-Mm-mm.
-[Pierre] Mm, they don't eat people in that book, darling.
-Are you sure?
-Yes. Well, I haven't read it.
[laughter]
-So?
No, he's right.
[Pierre clears throat] -Was
thinking of a different one.
-Gulliver's Travels?
-No.
The...
Shipwrecked.
-No.
No, he's right.
Oh, you've read all those books? [Chuckles]
-What?
-You have read all of those books?
-No.
-[Chuckles]
But if they were about
cannibals, I definitely would have.
Mm!
-[Laughter]
[Darlene laughing] Oh, my God.
Oh, I can never find time
to read anything anymore.
Well, I guess the mail, magazines.
-But is that reading really?
-No.
-[Darlene] Pierre.
-It isn't.
I agree. That's what I'm saying!
-[Darlene] What's the last thing you read?
-Um...
-Yeah. See?
-No, no, no, I read.
Um, actually, I read All Down Day.
What?
-[Darlene] You did?
-Yes.
-[Darlene] You did not!
-What's that?
-[Darlene] Wow! What'd you think?
Sh... uh, Darlene lent it to me.
-Oh. Oh! When?
-[Darlene] I can't believe you read it.
-It's, uh, like a novel?
-Mm...
Uh, it's kind of an experiment.
It's not really genre specific.
-Oh, boy.
-[Pierre] It's, it's good.
-It sounds good.
-It's lyrical.
Like poetry?
-Like lyrical.
-What's the difference?
-I have no idea.
-[Laughter]
-Do you think we would like it?
-[Darlene] Huh?
Me and Emily. Should
we borrow it after Pierre?
-[Darlene] Oh.
-[man 1] You can have it first, Emily.
Mm, no, it's probably not for me.
-[Darlene] Oh.
-Or you would've given it to me, right?
-Uh... -It's artsy, I know it.
[chuckles] It's artsy. Right?
-She's an artist.
-[Man 1] Oh, yeah.
We told you that. Didn't we?
-She is very good.
-[Man 1] I'm sure.
-Mm, she's wonderful.
-[Darlene] You haven't even seen my work.
I know, but I've heard about it from you.
-From Pierre.
-[Darlene] Oh.
-You've seen it, right?
-Um, yes.
Uh, some of it.
-And you liked it. Right?
-Right.
Some of it. [Chuckles]
What kind of art?
-Oh, it's kind of hard to explain.
-Why?
That's also kind of
hard to explain. [Laughs]
What kind of artist is she, Pierre?
[stutters] Good. W... wonderful.
-Like Emily said.
-Like you said.
-I... I do installations.
-Oh.
Like, I install... I build...
-I know what installations are, I do them, too.
-[Emily] Uh-huh?
Yeah, Rick's a carpenter.
-Rick's a designer.
-And a carpenter.
Oh, he makes beautiful furniture.
[gasps] He made this table!
-He did?
-Mm-hmm.
-He did.
-We were looking for something,
and a friend sent us to his studio, and...
[sharply inhales and
exhales] perfect. It was perfect.
-Well... you had me change the stain.
-It was. Yeah, okay.
[chuckling] But, the table...
-It's beautiful. It is.
-Yeah.
-H... how long did it take you?
-Uh, you know, a couple of months.
-My whole life.
-[Darlene] Right. Oh, sorry, should I not?
[Rick] No, you're fine.
I just... it just, it feels great.
[chuckles softly]
-Yeah. It should.
Uh, speaking of, I got the new piece.
-Sorry?
-With me. I brought the, uh...
-It's finished.
-It is?
-He has the piece, Pierre.
-Terrific.
Well, you finished it already? So fast!
Well...
-What, uh, what is it?
-It's a stool.
-It's a bench.
-[Emily] Oh.
-It's a stool.
But more of a stool-ish bench, right?
Mm, nope.
-Mm, like a long seat.
-Like a stool.
Okay. I, I thought we had talked about...
What?
Mm, mm, nothing, I guess. [Chuckles]
-You want to just see it?
-[Emily] Of course.
-No... Not now. We're eating.
-I'll just... I'll just go grab it.
-[Darlene] Mm... oh!
-Ooh, and we've still got dessert.
-[Rick] It's just right outside.
-Oh, and it's raining, I think.
-[Darlene] Is it?
-I think.
-[Rick] So what?
-Well, you'll get wet.
[Rick laughs] So what?
-I love the rain.
-[Pierre] But the piece will get wet.
-I love the rain at night.
-We'll just have to wait it out.
[horn distantly blaring]
Is that your car?
Which?
-[Darlene] The, uh, the truck.
[Rick] Oh. [Laughs] -You
have a gun rack on your truck?
Yeah.
For what?
-For guns.
-[Emily laughs]
[sarcastically laughs] -[Pierre]
She's not used to the country.
-[Emily] Oh, Pierre. Like you are.
-[Pierre] What?
-[Pierre] N... I live here. I mean, well, you're new.
-I live here.
[scoffs] -I remember when I was new.
-Oh, Emily, please.
-What?
[mumbles] You were never new.
Well, yo... you know... you know what I mean.
-[chuckles] Yes, I think I do.
-It was a compliment.
You, you know, you're...
wise.
[laughs]
-Is that funny?
-Okay if I open another bottle?
-Absolutely.
-Oh.
-Oh, God. I h... I have to drive.
Mm, what?
No, you've got to stay for dessert.
-Oh, God, I can't. I'm stuffed.
-What?
Oh... [laughs]
-Oh, God.
[laughter]
[Pierre clears throat]
[ominous music]
-To our hosts.
-To our guests.
[clinking]
Mm. This is, this is interesting.
-Do you know what that comes from?
-[Darlene] Wine?
-No. Toasts. Toasting.
-It's French...
It's... it was to stop people
poisoning each other.
-[Darlene] What?
-[Pierre] Yes, it's true. Yeah.
-No.
-[Pierre] No, no, yes, yes.
Everyone would bring their glasses
-to the middle of the table.
-W... when?
Whenever. Whenever. Olden...
[chuckles] But... So
your glasses are together,
and then you, you know,
enthusiastically you just sort of...
And, so, some of the wine
from everyone's glasses
would slosh over into everyone's glasses...
I don't think you could use glasses for...
and then you'd know
you were safe.
Why?
-'Cause everyone's sharing.
-It doesn't seem that safe to me.
-Everyone's drinks are mixed.
But the glasses...
-It seems like a lot of germs.
Well, this is before they knew about germs.
[Darlene groans] -You're
not gonna die from germs.
-Yes, you are.
-[Darlene] You are.
Not as quick as you'd die from poison.
-[Pierre] Thank you.
-[Emily chuckles]
No, I still don't, I still
don't think it's right.
Uh, that's a lot of spilled
wine. [Laughs] -[Darlene laughs]
Couldn't they all just
drink from the same bottle?
-Yes!
-Or, or not poison each other?
Oh. No.
-Human nature.
-Is to poison each other?
-Unfortunately. What? I said, "Unfortunately."
-[Darlene] Emily!
I'm not happy about it.
-Maybe we should skip dessert.
-[Emily laughs] What?
-[laughing] No, you can't.
-I really... I think I have to, Emily.
-I cannot eat anything else.
-[Whining] No!
-I can always eat.
-[Emily] Oh, good.
I should've been one of those, uh,
-professional eaters.
-What?
You know, they do
contests, like Coney Island.
-Yeah, like with pies.
-Those are so wasteful.
-Yeah, or hot dogs.
-That's what we're having for dessert.
-So wasteful!
-Hot dogs?
-Pie, Pierre.
-Everything fun is wasteful.
-That's why it's fun.
-[Emily] I made strawberry whip
-and chocolate chestnut.
-[Pierre] Chocolate chestnuts?
-You made them?
-Chestnut pie?
Mm, it's a very rich.
Oh, I should've gone to class today.
-I should have gone to yoga.
-[Darlene] Oh.
[sighs] Now I'm gonna miss it.
Another two weeks on top
of eating like a...
Ugh, like a, like a pig. Like a horse.
-[Rick] No, no. Horses are vegetarians.
-[laughs]
-[Darlene] What... why are you gonna miss?
-Mm?
-[Darlene] Why can't you?
-Oh, I'm going to Chicago.
Mm, you know, they
probably have yoga there.
[Emily] What?
-[Pierre] In Chicago.
You, you could probably
find a place that hosts a class
within the limits of that
major American city.
No. No, I like the studio
here. I'm attached to it.
-Mm-hmm. Emily, please.
-I am!
When was the last time you were...
-Wh... Excuse me!
I was gonna go, I was gonna
go today! I was in the car.
But then I checked the schedule,
and I saw that it was power yoga.
-Power yoga? What's power yoga?
-[Darlene] Oh, yeah.
"That sounds very aggressive", I thought. Very...
-[Darlene] Yeah.
Was it?
-[Darlene] No.
Oh. Well, from the name.
From the name, it sounds
like it was meant to be.
Nothing is meant to be
any... we're not fatalists.
[laughter]
-[Emily] What?
-I said we're not fatalists.
What?
I think he means fatalism. Like, when you believe...
-No, I know what fatalism is.
-I don't.
-[Chuckles]
It's...
just something that
sounds bad, but it isn't.
-[Rick] Like power yoga.
-[Pierre] Or chestnut pie.
-Pierre. Stop picking on me.
-[Pierre] What?
-I made this whole meal.
-What?
-I think it sounds good...
-I... [stutter] I wasn't...
[clears throat]
-[Emily] Thank you.
picking on you. What... w...
Was I picking on her?
-Don't drag our guests into this.
-My gosh.
She's so sensi... All
right. All right, I'm sorry.
I thought it was still acceptable
for a man to make a joke,
to, to, to ex... express his opinions
on dessert in his own home.
-Call me old fashioned.
-No.
-Emily.
-You're not old fashioned. You're old.
-I'm not old.
-Only old people say that.
-No, I ran three miles today. Do old people...
-Wow. Did you?
-Ye... Yes!
-In a row?
-See? See? You're picking on me!
-[laughs] Please!
At least I ran. At least I
didn't skip super yoga.
-Power yoga.
-How would you know what it's called?
It wasn't that great. You know,
you didn't really miss anything.
[sighs]
-Did Jason lead it?
-[Darlene clicks tongue] Uh, yeah.
-I missed Jason.
-[Pierre] Who's Jason?
-[Emily] He's a yoga instructor.
-[Pierre] But who is he?
Do I know him? He, he lives here?
I... I think he lives over the bluffs.
[Rick] He lives over the bluffs?
He comes all the way in for yoga?
-It's just twice a week.
-Wait. Wait.
Why do you know where he
lives, Darlene? [Gasps softly]
-[Darlene] Emily.
-Oh! Jason!
[Pierre] Jason what?
-[Emily] Is that something?
-No.
-Emily, no.
-[Emily] W... why not?
-He's very striking.
-He asked me for a ride one day.
-That's it. That's all. And I said no.
-And?
-[sighs] Darlene!
-I didn't have time to drive all the way out there.
-It is pretty far.
-Yeah. I mean, I felt bad.
-He doesn't have a car?
-How are you ever gonna meet anyone?
-[Darlene] Oh!
-You are hopeless.
-You are so hopeless.
-[mumbles] Wait. Why doesn't he have a car?
-How does he live?
-Jesus, Pierre! Maybe he has a bicycle.
[Darlene] Actually, I think he h... has a...
-[both] What?
-[Darlene] Well, I think he has...
What?
- A skateboard.
[Emily chuckles]
-What?
-No, no, no! I know, I... I know.
-[cross talk]
[Pierre] Oh, then he doesn't need a car.
I mean, if he has a skateboard.
-Don't be nasty, Pierre.
-Don't you be nasty.
Don't try to set up a friend
with some, uh, homeless man.
-[Darlene] He's not homeless.
-Of course he's not.
Although, you never did see his house.
-Oh, stop.
-We'll find you someone better.
[Darlene chuckles]
-[Emily sighs]
He's fi... I'm fine.
-I don't need to be set up.
-[Pierre] Exactly.
[Emily] You'll meet someone
and be perfectly happy.
[Pierre] She doesn't need to meet
someone to be perfectly happy.
-What? How can you say that?
-I can say it because I think it.
-[Darlene] Guys.
-You think people can be perfectly happy and be alone?
-[Darlene] I'm not n... alone.
-Well, you think people can be perfectly happy and be together?
[scoffs]
[thunder rumbling in distance]
-Emily. We still got...
-[Emily] I'm getting dessert.
- dinner plates all over the table.
-[Emily] So clear them.
-We can help.
-Y... yeah.
No, no. No, thank you.
[sighs]
[Rick] Why are Mom and Dad so mad?
[Darlene chuckles] Stop!
[Rick whispers] What did you do?
-What did you do?
-Nothing.
-I'm a very good boy.
-[Cutlery clatters]
Should we leave?
No way.
I'm getting some of that pie.
Seriously.
I think it's weirder if we just take off.
[sighs]
We can give them a couple minutes, yeah.
We can sit here...
pretend to enjoy each other's company.
[indistinct chatter distantly]
[cutlery clattering]
-You think you'll stay?
-You just told me I have to.
-I mean, here, in town.
-Oh. Yeah.
I hope so. If I can afford it. [Chuckles]
-Yeah.
-I don't think my installations pay as well as yours. [Laughs]
-You'd be surprised.
-Oh, are they more than $0?
'Cause that's the going rate
for most of mine. [Chuckles]
Does it matter what you charge if...
people don't pay?
-Oh, deadbeats.
Deadbeats everywhere you look.
No.
They'll pay you for the, uh...
-Yeah, we'll see.
Last time, it took them six months.
[whispers] No! They have the money.
Th... that's why they have the money.
-It's how the rich stay rich.
-[whine pouring]
-[Darlene sighs] God.
-I can't chase them.
[smacks lips] It's okay. I'm fast.
[laughs]
And...
I know where they
live. [Mimics slashing]
[laughs]
-[chuckles]
[dramatic music]
Where do you live?
I h... have a cabin.
[chuckles]
-Yeah? Where?
In the woods.
Yeah. Where?
[chuckles] Sorry, off, um...
off Pitts And Way.
-By the fire tower.
-Mm-hmm.
It's a good spot.
-Kind of isolated.
-Yeah, kind of... no, very.
Yes. And, you know, it's funny, I
came out here for, uh, peace and quiet,
-but it's not actually that quiet.
-[chuckles]
I'm by myself at night, and
I think, "I'm not by myself",
-what the fuck was that?" [chuckles] Mm.
-Mm, you're spooked. Get a dog.
-No. Too distracting.
-Get a boyfriend.
-Mm, no.
-[Laughter]
[horn distantly blaring]
I had a dog when I was a
kid. I had a German shepherd.
-She was actually... It's very...
-It was a she?
-Huh?
-Your dog was a she? You had a she-dog?
-I had a female dog.
-[thunder rumbling in distance]
Yes. [Chuckles]
-[chuckles]
Uh, I always think of dogs
are guys and cats are girls.
I know that doesn't work out, but
look at them. Cats are very feminine.
Yeah.
And a German shepherd, that's not a guy?
-That's a guy. It's a man.
-It's a dog.
It's a man's dog.
[chuckles] Anyway.
Anyway, yeah. Uh...
When we were on vacation...
[chuckles] God, this was terrible. But, uh,
we were at this mountain house.
Must have belonged to my parents' friend...
I can't remember. But, uh, it had
a lot of space around the house,
like a few acres. And down the street,
there's this sheep farm.
And I was nine or ten.
-Young.
-Young, yeah. Not done with having my dog.
-Oh.
-So... Right. So, the dog is a dog,
and there's 100, 200 sheep down the block.
-And he got out. She.
-Ye... Uh, she.
[chuckling] Yeah, she
gets out. And it's night.
And it should've been fine.
I mean, there's fences, obviously,
and the street is really
long. It's a country road.
It's like a quarter mile down to the farm.
A quarter mile for a dog is
like... [mimics whooshing]
It's... Yeah. So she's out.
She runs, right? She's running,
and it's night, and the
dirt road, and the moon.
She gets to the farm.
And she just goes for it.
All these animals, six or seven.
She hopped the fence.
And in the morning, they found them.
All these sheep, like, ripped up,
but not all dead yet. Just,
like, ripped open a lot of them,
at the throat.
And she's still in the pen with them.
[chuckles softly] Like, not bothered.
She walked right over to the keeper,
they said, followed him
around, lamb to lamb.
At one of them as he's
inspecting it, she even...
licked it, like, very sweet.
Like a nurse.
And like, "Oh, certainly she
hadn't done anything wrong."
They called us and we
went to pick her up. But...
when we got there, they
said, "Oh, no! No, no, no."
She is going to animal control.
She has to be put down because
"she's killed all these
sheep and she's a danger."
-[Ricky] Oh.
-And I thought, "No." I was like,
"No, you are the danger. You, the farmer,
are the danger to the sheep.
And nobody is putting you to sleep."
I...
-Right? "You slit their throats on a regular basis."
You slit their throats for money.
"-That's the danger."
-[chuckles] Okay.
Okay, the farmer does it for money,
and the dog does it for...
-Yeah, like, for fun.
-[chuckles] Jesus.
-No, kind of.
Is fun a better reason than money?
I'm saying... it's not that
different for the farmer.
Money is fun. Money is fun.
-Money is necessary.
-Money is not necessary.
Not that kind of money. Not blood money.
Okay, okay.
-Sorry.
-No.
Well, it's very sad.
It was.
I'm sorry your dog died.
-My dog got killed.
-Right.
[Darlene] Just for being herself.
Sometimes that's very dangerous.
Okay!
-[Darlene] Hi!
[dramatic music]
Thought we'd switch to white. Yeah?
Or... we don't have to,
but these are both terrific
-and they're already cold.
-[Darlene] Then, yeah. Terrific.
[Rick] Terrific. Down the hatch.
Yeah, we could've stuck with red
-but the only one we had has a parrot on the label...
-[grunts]
- and I just can't trust that.
-Oh.
-Was it like a, a pirate parrot?
-[Pierre] Aren't they all?
Sorry, I think I brought that one.
Oh! Uh, I'll go get it.
[chuckling] No! No, no, I
don't know anything about wine.
-What's there to know?
-Right.
-It's probably awful.
-Why? Is it cheap? Is it old?
Uh, I think old would
make it better, right?
-Old would make it good.
-Alcohol makes it good.
[laughs] -Alcohol makes everything good.
-Mm. Debatable.
-[Darlene] Let's just have one of these.
Great. Start with the...
[inhales sharply] Soave?
-[Rick] Ooh, start with the Soave. Always.
-[Darlene chuckles]
[Pierre clears throat]
Oops. [Chuckles]
-[Darlene chuckles]
[clears throat]
[Pierre] Oops. [Tsks]
[clears throat]
[chuckles and grunts]
-You want some help?
-Nope. No.
[inhales and exhales]
[pops]
-Oh, shit.
-Stupid!
-I do that all the time.
[laughter]
-Do you?
I'm terrible at opening
wine. I was a terrible server.
-I can open a bottle of wine with a shoe.
-I was really bad.
-Hard heeled shoe or a shoelace.
-What? Really?
-I'll show you.
-It... it's fine.
[stutters] Thank you.
My tables used to open
their bottles themselves.
-[Pierre] No.
-Yeah. Sometimes. I mean, I would try.
I would get started, and then,
they would have to intervene.
Like, they'd lean in and
grab the bottle, smile, and...
-Where were you working? God!
-[Darlene] No.
-Oh, brats.
-No, it was smart. It was good wine.
I thought you don't know about wine?
-I know what we were charging for it.
-Mm.
I didn't realize you waited tables.
-[Darlene] Yeah, well, didn't everyone?
-[Rick and Pierre] No.
-[chuckles] Really? Never?
-Nope.
Oh.
-Oh, I can't trust you!
-[Pierre] You can't?
No, everyone needs to work in a restaurant.
Everyone who eats in a restaurant
needs to work in a restaurant.
-Alas.
-[Rick] I worked at a summer camp.
Not the same.
-And I was a lifeguard.
-It's not the same.
-I work now.
-Yeah, so do I.
Yeah?
[Darlene scoffs and
laughs] -[Pierre grunts]
Finally! [Chuckles]
-[Darlene chuckle]
-Sh... uh, should we get Emily?
-[Pierre] Here we go.
Should we get Emily?
Uh, no.
-Well, maybe she needs help with the pies?
-No, she's, she's lying down.
-What?
-[Pierre] No, she, she's fine. She, she has a...
-Is she all right?
-Well, she has a headache.
-Oh, God.
-[Whispers] Yeah.
-[stutter] W... we should go.
-No, no, no, no.
-Yeah. Yes, of course.
-No, no, no, no. Darlene!
We just opened this bottle.
I'm not gonna drink the whole thing
myself. You're not gonna make me drink
a whole bottle of wine...
[chuckles] by myself?
And I wanna talk to you about that book.
-[Darlene] Oh, yeah.
-I, I read it. I'd, I'd,
I'd like to discuss it.
-Yeah, I just don't wanna bother Emily.
-[Pierre] Y...
-She has a headache.
-[Pierre] She does.
-So I don't wanna disturb her.
-We won't.
She's in the back bedroom.
You know what, you can't
hear anything up there.
And we can speak quietly, can't we?
About a book?
I don't know.
These casual chats about
post-modern literature
-can get pretty heated.
-[Darlene laughs]
They can, actually.
It's not postmodern.
-[Rick] Oh, no?
-It's post-post.
-Sorry, I haven't read it yet.
-[Darleen] Yeah...
-[Rick] Don't ruin the ending.
-[Darlene] Okay.
-Doesn't really have an ending.
-Spoiler alert!
[laughs]
You know, you don't have to stay.
-What?
-If you're really planning on reading it
and you don't want to...
-No, no, no.
No, no, no, I'll stay.
I don't want you to have to
finish a whole bottle by yourself.
[Pierre scoffs]
You know, I'm just gonna run to the...
[Pierre] Up the stairs,
first landing on the left.
Yeah. I'll, I'll be quiet.
[whispering] So will we.
[horn distantly blaring]
Hey.
You want me to leave?
Not necessarily.
[softly chuckles]
[wine pouring]
[clinking]
[wine pouring]
[cork squeaking]
[squeaks and pops]
[wine pouring]
[wine pouring]
[Pierre exhales]
-[Rick burps]
[deeply inhales and exhales]
[Darlene] Hi.
Uh-oh. What are you guys doing?
[Pierre clears throat] -Just, um...
talking.
[Darlene] Uh-huh, about what?
You, I guess.
-Uh-oh.
-[Pierre] No, nothing bad.
I bet.
[chuckles] -[thunder distantly rumbles]
-[Darlene] When are you going to Chicago?
-Hmm?
-[Darlene] When are you guys leaving?
-[clicks tongue]
-Oh, I'm not going.
-[Darlene] Oh.
-Emily's going.
-All by herself?
Well, no. She'll have a whole
plane full of people with her.
[chuckling] -She'll have the whole city.
-I like Chicago.
-[Darlene] Yeah.
-[Pierre] I don't.
-Is that why you're not going?
-'Cause you don't like it?
-[Pierre] Mm, no.
-'Cause you don't like Emily?
-[Darlene] Hey.
Or no, you like her, just not as
much as you don't like Chicago.
-I don't like flying.
-[Darlene] Really?
-Yeah, it's dangerous.
-[Darlene] No, it's not.
-It's unnatural.
-[Both] No, it's not.
-[chuckles] Birds fly.
-[Pierre] I'm not a bird.
No, you're a human. You're a human
being whose human being friends
have figured out how to fly,
and will let you come along.
-For a price.
-They're not my friends.
And they've only figured
it out until they haven't.
-Planes crash.
-Not really. Not a lot.
-Birds crash. They must, all the time, into windows.
-[Pierre] What?
Yeah, yeah. Another man-made problem.
-Windows?
-[Pierre] We're destroying the earth!
Well, that's true. [Chuckles]
-No, it isn't.
-[Darlene] What?
[scoffs] We're not
destroying it, we're using it.
-Oh, boy.
-Like it's using us.
Um...
-It is, for fertilizer, for farming.
Well, it doesn't need to be farmed.
-We need it to be farmed.
-For protection.
-We are not protecting the earth!
-Speak for yourself.
Ye... Uh, I am, I do.
We're constantly protecting the earth.
We... All, all the regulations and parks,
an... and there's that
huge... uh, what's it called?
That, uh, program...
Mm, where we scan the, the solar...
[sighs] for asteroids, gi... that are
flying through space and might collide?
-What?
-[Rick] It... it's a program. Program.
It's, it's a program, like
a lookout we're running
where we stop things
before they hit the earth
and, and there are missiles.
If we see something, we'll send
them up there first and blow them up.
-I think that's a movie.
-It is a movie!
It, it, it was a movie. It's
also real. It's a real program.
It is! In space.
-Don't look at me, I don't even like airplanes.
-[laughs]
Okay. I, I don't know that
much about outer space,
-so I can't say if what you're saying is true or not.
-It is.
-But even if it is, even if it is...
-It is.
we would be doing those
things to protect ourselves,
-not the planet, so, I... Oh!
-But we are the planet! We are the planet.
We come from the planet, literally.
We're its soil, its cells,
we are its product.
-You believe in evolution, right?
-Yeah. Do you?
We're not some separate alien invaders.
It's not the earth and all its animals,
and then humans too. Also, humans
are animals, are a part of the whole...
[sighs] When people say... it is so
egotistical when they say "man-made,"
"Man-made stuff." Okay, man made stuff.
Well, nature made man.
Nature made man to make stuff!
-To make plastic and cement...
-[laughs]
and houses and planes and nuclear bombs.
-And crazy arguments?
-Sure.
-Okay.
-It is okay. It's all okay. It should be.
-Do, do bears feel bad for being bears?
-[Darlene] I don't know.
Do dogs feel bad? Does your dog feel bad...
-[Darlene] Hey!
-You have a dog?
-No.
You see what I'm saying, though?
-No.
-We are so down on ourselves
a... as a species, as part of...
After all the things we've
done, everything that we've seen
-and made, and made better, made faster.
-Mm, not always better.
A... all the inventions we've
invented, all the buildings we've built!
-The cars we've carved.
-[Darlene] All the wars we've started.
-Yeah, yes. And all the wars we've ended...
-[upbeat jazz music playing]
and prevented and survived.
-[Darlene] Not all of us.
-Not all of us started them.
[Darlene] No. The ones with the guns did.
[sighs] Or the ones with the money.
[Darlene] Well, I don't have either of those, so...
-Uh-huh.
-[Darlene] I don't.
-[Pierre] Mm, that's okay.
-I'm sure you do something wrong.
-[Darlene] Oh, yeah, daily.
[Pierre laughs]
-Nightly.
But I see now. Now I see. I have to do it.
I have no choice. Nature makes me do it.
-[Rick] All right.
-I have to not floss.
-I have to like Phil Collins.
-[Pierre] No.
I have to love him. You
have to hate Chicago.
-[Pierre] I don't hate it.
-With all its natural skyscrapers,
-its natural elevated trains, its natural thick pizza.
-[Pierre] That's not pizza.
-It's like a wildlife refuge.
-Yeah, yeah, full of wild fucking animals.
[scoffs] -Don't talk
that way about my wife.
[laughs]
It's not an insult.
I think animals are great.
We could learn a lot from them.
Well, I thought we are them, you're saying.
And we could learn how to accept that.
We could learn how to be ourselves.
Say what we think, take what
we want, know what we want.
-Yeah, good luck with that.
-You don't know what you want?
[rain splattering]
[music continues]
I know I want another drink.
[deeply inhales] Darlene?
Uh...
I'm good. I have to drive.
[Pierre] No, you know what?
-Just stay over.
-[Chuckles]
-[Pierre mumbles] Drive tomorrow.
-Tomorrow, I have to work.
[scoffs]
What?
[chuckles] Nothing.
I do actually work.
-You know, it is actually work, what I do.
-No, no, I, I, I know.
And you know that there's
work, and there's work.
-Who could argue?
-Don't get upset.
No, h... no, he's right. Darlene, I mean,
we can't all be lifeguards.
[chuckles] I mean, there's a,
there's a test, isn't there?
Like an obstacle course in a,
-in a, in a pool? Or, or did you work at the beach?
-[Rick] No, it was a pool.
Okay.
What do you do for money, Pierre?
-Oh, okay.
-You have a job?
You ever had a job?
You just, what, find it?
-[Pierre] Mm-hmm.
-Take it, steal it?
-Sure. Yeah, good for you too.
-Wow, good for you.
-Yeah?
-Yeah. How else am I gonna buy all this wine
for you to drink?
-[Rick] Oh, thanks.
How else am I gonna
pay for all your hard work?
All your hard, real work, making...
Hand-making beautiful stool benches
that you keep stacked
up out there on your car...
-Are you gonna pay me? When?
- in your monster truck.
-Mm, we'll settle up. Yeah, we'll settle up before you go.
-Yeah?
-That's gonna be pretty soon. I have to give Darlene...
-All right.
- a ride home. She has to work tomorrow.
-Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa...
-I'm fine.
-Oh, now you don't have to work?
-No, I don't need a ride!
-But you drank all that wine.
-Well... you've had more than me.
-No.
But, but you have too.
You have. So have I.
-All right. You drive.
-[Darlene mumbles]
No, just... yo... you can both stay.
-We have plenty of room.
-So does my truck.
Well, you're not gonna sleep in your truck.
We could. Pop the sunroof, watch the stars.
[shouts] No! You can't!
[rain splattering]
It's raining!
And the, the, the... piece...
-[Rick] The stool.
- is in there, is in there. That must take up some...
-You know what? I'll go get it. I'll bring it in.
-No, but it...
But it's still...
-No, I think it stopped.
Yeah, stopped. Be right back.
Listen, I don't think you
should drive with him.
-I know.
-I think you should just stay.
[scoffs]
-Pierre, I don't need to.
-I know you don't need to, but it would be...
[Rick] Did Emily take your jacket?
-[Darlene] Huh?
-[Rick] When you came in, did she take your jacket?
Uh, I think so, yeah.
[Rick] Do you know where she put it?
Um...
-Did you check the hall closet?
[Rick] Yes. My keys are in my jacket.
-My jacket is not in the closet.
-Okay.
Maybe upstairs in the gue... guest room.
-Okay. I'll find it.
-Wait! [Scoffs]
He is so aggressive.
[chuckles] -I don't
understand people like that.
Well, you don't have to understand him.
You have to pay him.
-What?
-That's why he's upset.
I... What? I have to pay him for what?
For the, the, the, the, the...
-Yes.
Wait, what's he saying? He... h... he said...
-He's complaining about us?
-He's not complaining.
He didn't even make us what we asked
for. He didn't even make us what we need.
-Oh, nobody needs a bench, Pierre.
-[scoffs] Nobody needs a stool.
-Yeah.
-You shouldn't believe everything people say, Darlene.
-You've just met that man.
-What?
You don't... you can't trust every... Oh...
-You introduced us.
-No... No, no, no, no, no. No.
-You set us up.
You're, you're not set up.
[stutter] Th... no, that's Emily.
[laughs] -I have no interest in that.
I have no interest in setting you up.
[scoffs] I've absolutely
no interest in, in that.
What?
-[Laughs]
You look so small right now.
Sitting there.
I'm not.
Emily's leaving...
for two weeks for Chicago.
[whispers] Right.
Well, maybe while she's in Chicago...
uh... [clears throat] maybe we can talk.
About what?
[chuckles]
About the book?
-Yes. Yes, exactly. About the book.
-Mm.
-You liked it?
-I liked it so much.
[both exhale]
-Is that right?
I don't know.
-Don't you want me to like it?
-I... probably shouldn't.
Oh! No, no, no, no.
You just, you got a little...
Oh. [Chuckles]
-Oh.
-What? [Chuckles]
No, it, it's just... I... I thought
it was a piece of... something.
[shakily exhales]
-It's not?
-No.
It's something else.
I can't.
No?
You can't.
You can't run on me.
[deeply inhales]
You don't know what I can do.
Hey.
Hi! Sorry. Hi.
-Did you find your jacket?
-Um, no,
-no, I did not find my jacket.
-Did you check the kitchen?
Mm-hmm. I checked
everywhere. You all right?
Yeah... [chuckles] yeah, of course. Yeah.
-I think it's time to go.
-I'd agree.
-You drive me, all right?
-[Pierre] She's not comfortable with that.
-She's already said it.
-She's fine.
She does not feel comfortable.
Okay, then, uh, how about Emily drives us?
-What? No.
-Why not?
-She's sick. Of course.
-Is she?
See, that's strange. Um, that is strange,
'cause she isn't upstairs.
-What?
-And she isn't in here,
or in there, or anywhere
as far as I can tell.
-She's in the back bedroom.
-No.
You went in there?
-I was looking for my coat.
-Emily. Emmy!
I thought you said she
couldn't hear us up there.
-[Pierre] She'd hear that.
-Mm, right,
-exactly.
-[Pierre] Excuse me.
-Uh, we should go now.
-What?
Uh, I mean it. Right now.
No. I wanna make sure she's all right.
She's not all right. She's missing.
Well, I don't think she's missing.
-She's not here.
-It's not the same thing.
-Come on, would you stop... I...
-Can you please not grab at me?
-I'm not, I'm not grabbing at you.
-Don't just put your hands on...
-Wow! Well, I'm trying to help you.
-Did you...
You didn't see her? She
didn't come down here?
-[Darlene] No. Maybe she went for a walk.
-[scoffs] Come on.
-In the middle of the night?
-[Darlene] It's not the middle of the night.
-In the rain?
-It's stopped. You said.
[Pierre] Did you say something to her?
[Rick] I didn't see her. She wasn't there.
-Did you do something?
-Did you?
-[Darlene] Well, maybe she... Oh.
-[Pierre] What?
No, nothing. Her car, it's parked in.
[Rick] Uh-huh.
-Maybe we should call someone.
-Who?
-I don't know, the police?
-Darlene.
-[Darlene] Maybe we should. It's late.
-Darlene.
-I'm just... Whoa!
-Stop it!
[cell phone buzzing]
I was just calling her phone.
[buzzing continues]
[Pierre] Guess she didn't take it with her.
[Darlene] Yeah.
-T... take it with her where?
-[Pierre] I have no idea.
-I, I didn't hear her leave.
-Maybe she didn't.
-[Pierre] Oh, would you stop it?
-You want her to have left?
I want you to stop
implying that I slit her throat
-and stuffed her in a closet.
-I'm not implying that. I checked all the closets.
-[Pierre] Wow. You are a real piece of work.
-Says the pot to the pan.
-[Pierre] That's not the phrase.
-That's not the problem.
-I don't have a problem!
-[Rick] That's your fucking problem.
-You don't even know when you're in trouble.
-He's not in trouble.
-[Rick] You either.
-Emily's the one in trouble.
-[Pierre] No, she isn't.
-[Rick] How do you know?
Well, how do you know
she is? You seem very sure.
-Two and two, buddy.
-No, I'm not your buddy.
[laughs]
-Would you just shut up?
-Ooh, there he is.
Hey, get the fuck out of my house!
Sure. Find my fucking jacket.
I don't think anyone
should leave until Emily...
Can we please just calm
down? Just calm down!
Think. When is the last time...
-Him. Him.
-[Pierre] No.
-In the kitchen.
-Yeah, right, the kitchen. Okay.
-Place with all the knives.
The place with the blender...
-And then? She's in the kitchen, and then?
And then, she went upstairs.
-Mm, she went upstairs.
-[Pierre] She did.
[sighing] And then?
-[Pierre] And then,
you went upstairs.
-[Darlene] Oh.
-Y... you went upstairs too.
-Did you see her?
-No.
[Pierre] Well, you were up there for...
Wha... I went to the landing. Pierre!
And then I went up and she wasn't there.
Well... or...
Oh, my God. Or, or, or maybe she is there.
Y... Uh, she's, she's still there. Yeah,
she's, she's hiding under the bed.
She's listening to us through the floor.
She couldn't hear us through the floor.
[Rick] Oh, I bet she's got some great ears.
Emily. Emily, if you can hear us,
you got great ears. Great...
-Great everything actually.
-You're not funny.
-[Rick] I'm not kidding. You got a beautiful wife.
-Stop it.
-Had a beautiful wife.
-[Darlene] What's, what's wrong with you?
Um, I'm not the one
angling to spend the night
-in this fucked up house.
-It's not fucked up.
[Ricky] I'm not the one siding with the guy
who'd clearly like to be rid of his wife.
[Pierre] Who should she side with?
The complete stranger? The, the brute?
-Oh, that's me, huh? Huh?
-The, the leather jacket, chainsaw, target practice.
-I... I don't need practice. I know what I'm doing.
-I'm sure.
-You should be.
-I... I'm sure you shoot something, knife something.
No problem. Kill it,
skin it, set it on fire.
I have no doubt. I'm just surprised
you feel that recommends you
-in this situation.
-What recommends me?
I'm surprised you wear that all so proudly.
What recommends me is I, I
don't care enough about your wife
-or you, or your wife...
-[Pierre] You care about squirrels?
-I don't even know you, man.
-He shoots squirrels.
-I shoot deer.
-[Pierre] Much better!
He shoots deer because he
cares about them so much!
-[Ricky] More than I care about you.
-[Pierre] No, with us,
-you just care about the money.
-[Ricky] Yeah.
[Pierre] Just care about who has the money!
[Ricky] Well, it's not
the people who should.
Oh, so you came to what, collect?
[chuckling] I, I came
to have dinner. Jesus.
I came because I was fucking invited.
-Not by me.
-[Ricky] That's clear. Thanks.
Well, so maybe you should be on your way.
-Look, he can't.
-No, I can't.
I can't. I am gonna walk.
-No, no, no, wait.
-Bye!
-[Pierre] No, no, no. Don't.
-[Darlene] Wait. Wait, wait, wait.
But since I'm pretty sure
I won't be invited back real soon,
let's handle that payment issue.
-True to form. Oh...
-Let's handle that transaction.
I'd love to, love to, Rick,
but, mm, don't have my
checkbook on me at the moment.
-[Rick] I'll wait.
-Uh, could be anywhere in this place.
[laughs] -C... could be upstairs.
And we know how hard
it is to find stuff there.
He's joking! You hear how, how he jokes?
I'm no businessman. You got me.
But maybe I shouldn't pay for something
I haven't actually received yet.
-Just, just as a rule of thumb.
-It's in your fucking driveway!
But I don't need it in my fucking driveway!
And I don't need your
fucking car there either!
Oh. Oh, sorry. Hate for
my stuff to get in the way.
-Me, too. I hate it. I hate it so much.
-Yeah?
-Well, how about I move it for you, then?
-[clattering]
-[Darlene yells] Jesus!
-[indistinct shouting]
That's not yours!
[clattering] -[Darlene yells and mumbles]
-That's paid for.
-[Rick] How about you keep the car
and I keep this?
-[Clattering]
-I'll keep this.
-Okay, fine.
[loud clattering]
-[Darlene yells]
[thud]
-Oh, my God! Stop!
[panting] -[Darlene]
Ar... are you all right?
-Yes.
-[Gasping]
But now you can call the police.
-You sure fucking can!
-[Pierre] Tell them there's been an assault.
Yeah, an assault with a deadly table.
Tell them that there's
been an attempted robbery.
Tell them there's been an actual robbery.
And tell them there's a
guy who misplaced his wife.
They'll love that. Not as
much as he loves it, but...
-Stop.
-[Rick] You know I'm right.
Wife disappears. It's always the husband.
Yeah, except for all the
times it's the psychopath.
-You're bleeding. N... no, you.
-[sighs] I am?
-[Ricky] Oh. It's, it's fine.
-[Darlene] It's not fine.
-Uh, don't, don't, don't do that.
-[Rick] Why not?
-Because it's my napkin.
-I cut myself on your glass.
-[Darlene] You have to clean it. You h... have to clean it out.
-I, I...
Come on, come on.
No.
[sighs]
[dramatic music]
[grunts]
[sighs]
[Darlene] Do you have the, um...
[Pierre] What?
[ominous music]
-Hi.
-[Darlene sighs]
I need the wine opener.
Um...
why?
[Darlene] Uh, it's a pretty deep cut,
I wanna disinfect it.
With wine?
Yes. With alcohol.
We used to do it all the
time at the restaurant.
[sighs] Okay.
Um... [clears throat] Just...
-[bottle softly clunks]
-Here. Just use this.
[clicks tongue] No, you use
red. Red has the higher alcohol.
Parrot red?
-Yes, Pierre.
-'Cause that'll probably kill him outright.
Huh. Um.
Oh!
Here we go.
Thanks.
[softly] My pleasure.
This is how all your
dinner parties turn out?
Of course.
By design.
I hope you had a good time.
Yeah.
Well, that's what life's all about.
[Rick] I think I found the vodka.
It's in the closet. A
bottle marked "vodka."
So, I'm, I'm just gonna...
I'm just gonna use this.
Hey!
-[Gasps] Oh, my God. [Gasps]
[Rick] Hey.
Hey.
[Emily] Hey.
That's my jacket.
-[Emily] Hmm?
-[Rick] We were looking for it.
Oh.
We were looking for you.
[horn distantly blaring]
Oh.
I took a bath.
I, I mean a walk.
It's raining.
-Yeah.
-And I couldn't find my umbrella.
-Emily.
-I lent it to someone.
I lent it to someone.
-That's right, it was you.
-I...
I, I...
-It's okay.
I should have more than one umbrella.
[Darlene] Um...
-I can afford it.
Or, of course, you could just get your own.
Are you all right? Are you hurt?
Am I hurt?
[Pierre] Do you want to, uh, change?
Do you want me to change?
Do you...
want me to change?
Only if you want to.
Only if you want me to.
[laughs] Just kidding. I can't
change. I don't have any other clothes.
I mean, I only have my clothes,
and that's not really different.
I think you've seen them all on me by now.
This is a terrific coat. I
hope I haven't ruined it.
-That's all right.
-[Emily] We can get it cleaned.
Looks clean enough.
-Looks like it just went through a car wash.
-[laughing] Right.
Right.
Well, next time, I'll get it dry cleaned.
[Emily chuckles]
Good one, Emily.
Thanks, Rick. I always liked you.
Yeah?
Your husband doesn't.
[Emily] My husband doesn't like anybody,
-except Darlene.
-All right.
She's likable.
She is. She's so...
[deeply inhales] nice smile,
lot of, lot of pluck, a lot of righteous...
Sticks up for the hopeless.
I mean, not all the hopeless. Not me.
Just the ones that don't
speak English. Speak at all.
-Maybe she doesn't like feedback.
-Please, Emily.
Oh! She doesn't.
Doesn't like feedback!
I don't blame you. It can be brutal.
Say, for instance, you cook a
beautiful, big meal for someone,
and instead of them
telling you they enjoy it,
they say straight out they don't.
[sharply inhales] Oof! [Scoffs] It hurts.
"Exactly", they say, "hurts the animal".
But I'm an animal too.
Aren't I an animal too?
So what about my feelings?
Right. Agree. I was just saying that mysel...
-You wouldn't ruin a cow's
dinner party, would you?
-You wouldn't kiss a cow's husband.
-Right.
I just... I don't think that
you can pick and choose.
Wasn't that your whole point? You shouldn't
pick and choose who you're nice to.
If you're not nice to everyone,
then you're not nice, Darlene.
Then you're something else.
Aren't you?
-I'm sorry.
-[Emily scoffs]
Oh, I hope not. I hope that
you got exactly what you wanted.
Otherwise... [deeply inhales and sighs]
oh, it's gonna be all
this trouble over nothing.
-It, it, it's not trouble.
-[Emily] Well, it's gonna be.
I mean, lawyers, right? And...
movers, counselors.
-Ugh, you'll probably make me do counseling.
-No, no, no.
I don't think you should have to pay people
-to listen to your problems.
-[Pierre] No...
If you have to pay them, they're
probably not really listening
or you don't really have
problems. Maybe you don't have
real problems if no one
wants to hear about them.
-People love problems.
-We don't have a problem.
Who's "we" in this scenario?
You know,
in France, I could shoot you?
[rain splattering]
I mean, I could shoot you here, too.
There's lots of guns.
But in France, I could get away with it.
It's, it's, it's a law. It's
a crime of passion law.
You catch your wife, or husband,
in bed with someone, and you kill them,
that's okay with the
French, they understand.
I don't know if it extends to stuff
you witness at the dining room table,
but spirit of the thing, I
bet they'd let me slide.
You know, if you couldn't
help it. "I couldn't help it.
I... murdered them both."
[Pierre] Emily.
Although, that's foggy, right?
[deeply inhales] "I couldn't
help it. He kissed me." Right?
"I couldn't help it. I felt like
kissing her." Where does it end?
[Pierre] How about
right there, Emily? Right...
-Right there is good.
-Oh. The expert.
It... it's enough.
[scoffs] He's not even
French, you know that?
It's just a name. You're not really
from there. You don't know the law.
-[Pierre] I know it's not that.
-Well, it ought to be.
-[Pierre] Maybe. Maybe, preferable to this.
-Yes.
-Oh, you don't like this?
-[Pierre] A bullet through the h...
Oh, you, you don't like it? This part?
-[Pierre] Quick. Over.
-I wonder...
if there's any way this
could've been avoided.
I wonder, do you think
that there is anything
you could have done...
or not done, to see
this turned out differently?
[Pierre] I don't know.
I honestly don't know.
Hmm.
I believe you.
Um, okay. Can I get my jacket?
Sure. Are you cold?
-No. I'm leaving.
-[Thunder rumbling]
So soon?
-[Pierre] Emily.
[Rick] Come on.
-[Emily] Didn't you have a coat, Darlene?
-Uh, it's okay.
To have a coat?
[Darlene] I'll come back another time.
[scoffs] You think so?
It's... We're fine. We'll... we'll just...
Good night.
Night.
[sighs]
Chivalrous.
This is a real mess.
Who's gonna clean it up?
I'm not trying to be clever.
I really don't wanna do it.
We'll do it in the morning.
[car door closes outside] -I
don't wanna do it then either.
[car engine starts] -Can
we just leave it like this?
We have other rooms.
[Emily scoffs]
Do you want me not to want things?
Of course not. That's ridiculous.
Do you want me not to
have the things I want?
I want you to have the things I want.
I want you to want the things I want.
-I do.
-No.
-I do too.
-No.
You want to want the things I want.
I do. [Sighs]
I shouldn't have invited Rick. [Sighs]
I should have invited a fucking banker,
or a blonde.
Emily.
[soft click]
Jesus.
[soft click]
[gasps] Jesus!
[pants]
-Sorry.
[dramatic music]
That's for me?
Mm-hmm.
This is also for me.
Okay.
Is she...
She left. Yeah.
Then you can have some pie.
It's nice.
A little high.
-Not for a stool.
-[Chuckles softly]
Feel like you're going to interview me.
Or I have to sing a song.
It doesn't swivel.
Well, can't have everything.
That's true, huh? [Scoffs]
I can't.
-Why?
-I don't know.
Math?
Cake and eat it, too.
Pie.
Pie, all right.
What if I don't wanna eat it?
What if I just wanna have it?
[Rick] That's not everything.
[Emily] Mm.
And you wanna eat it.
This is fucking delicious.
No, but... Say I'm allergic,
or I just... I, I, I don't wanna
eat it. I'm not inclined.
My everything is just having the pie,
seeing it on the table,
spending quiet morning with it.
That's not everyone's everything.
Well, I'm not talking about
everyone having everything.
I'm talking about me. One person.
Why I can't have my everything?
Because... No, because...
everyone having everything
is part of having everything.
What?
[Rick] Everybody having everything
is part of having everything.
Oh! [Laughs]
-Oh, no.
-[Rick] It is.
Oh, no. Are you a communist?
It's just, you're not really happy
if the people around you aren't.
That's all.
I'm not.
I don't think so.
I don't know you that
well, but I don't think so.
When I was in high school, I always wanted
to stay at a party as late as possible.
-I always wanted to be the last one there.
-What a surprise.
[Rick] But my mom wanted
me home because she was...
If I was out, she was up,
and I would get, you know,
a lot of screaming, a
lot of slamming doors.
Uh, I think, one time,
I threw a phone book.
But, eventually, one or
the other of us wins. Yeah?
And if it's me, then I can
stay till whatever, 1:00 a.m.
I basically have a shit time because...
I have abandoned this poor woman,
my mother.
I've disappointed someone
who would never disappoint me.
And, uh, the same for her, I think.
And she'd just spent the whole
night making me, like, brownies,
or a hot turkey sandwich.
This wasn't a reward,
right? It was an apology.
We fought and fought to get
what we wanted. Both of us.
I mean, both of us felt
awful when we got it.
And that is, you know...
-Codependency.
[Rick] Yeah. [Chuckles]
Yeah.
And love.
You threw a phone book at your mother?
Not at her.
There was a lot of action in my house.
-It was pretty volatile.
-[Emily] Oh.
No one got killed or
anything. Just yelling, threats.
-It was good conditioning.
-[Emily chuckles] For what?
I don't know, dinner parties?
[softly chuckles]
[Rick] I was scared when I was little
because everyone was
getting divorced back then.
-Do you remember that?
-Everyone's still getting divorced.
[Rick] No, but it was very popular,
very trendy for a while there,
-back in the '80s?
-Okay.
I'd just run downstairs, "Stop fighting.
I don't want you to get divorced."
And one day, my mom, she...
she grabs me and she takes
my whole head in her hands
and she says, "Calm down. Calm down."
We're not really fighting with each other.
We're fighting next to each other,
"but we're really fighting with ourselves."
I found that very comforting.
Oh.
[Rick] They're true, at least.
Yeah.
Yes.
I feel like I've been fighting
with myself my whole life.
[Rick] You're pretty level. Imagine
how someone like Pierre feels.
No. I don't want to. I don't need to.
[deeply inhales] I know how he
feels. That's what I've been fighting.
[scoffs] I'm not so different from him.
You know? Or your, your...
-Mm-hmm.
[Emily] I have teeth, don't I?
I have that same spark for take and ruin.
I... it's, it's, it's, it's
instinct, it's animal instinct.
-Everyone's dogs. Everyone's...
-[Rick] Yeah.
But at least I'm fighting it.
At least I am trying to resist.
-[Rick] He's fighting it. Look at him.
-[scoffs] No.
You're fighting your instincts.
He's fighting, fighting his instincts.
[horn distantly blaring]
Who will win?
[softly chuckles]
The cannibals.
["I Remember" by Molly Drake]
We tramped the open
moorland in the rainy April weather
And came upon the little
inn that we had found together
The landlord gave us toast and tea
And stopped to share a joke
And I remember a firelight
I remember a firelight
I remember a firelight
And you remember smoke
We ran about the meadow grass
With all the harebells bending
And shaking in the summer wind
The summer never ending
We wander to the little stream
Among the river flats
And I remember willow trees
I remember willow trees
I remember willow trees
And you remember gnats
The autumn leaves are tumbling down
And winter's almost here
But through the spring and summertime
We laughed away the year
And now we can be grateful
For the gift of memory
For I remember having fun
Two happy hearts that beat as one
When I had thought that we were we
But we were you
And me
[horn honking]
[soft clinking]
[water gently splashing]
[thunder rumbling]
[rain splattering]
[wind whistling]
[thunder loudly rumbling]
[thunder loudly rumbling]
-[woman 1] Yeah, it's not.
-[man 1] They are. They're... No, the chickens are.
[man 2 stutters] We
only buy grass fed beef.
-[man 1] That's great. That's really great.
-[woman 2] It is.
-[man 2] Yeah.
-[Woman 1] Not for the beef.
[woman 2 laughs]
-[man 2] What?
What did you say?
-[Woman 1] I said,
"Not for the beef, it isn't great."
[man 2] All right.
But I mean...
-[man 1] Um, actually,
-it is great.
-[Woman 1] Uh, yeah?
-[man 1] Actually, is.
-[man 2] Or, well, it's better.
-Well, he means... [sighs] you know what he means.
-[woman 1] Um...
[man 1] You got a grass-fed beef animal...
[Darlene] A cow!
-[Man 2] Darlene!
-[man 1] A grass-fed cow.
-Or steer.
I think it's steer. Cows
give milk, don't they?
[man 2] Cows can be beef.
[man 1] Cows are beef by definition.
-[Darlene] Cows are cows by definition.
-You know what he means.
[man 2] Uh...
-[man 1] Beef comes from cow. Beef is meat from a cow.
-That's its definition.
-But I think beef might just come from steers.
-[man 2] No, Emily.
-No?
[man 1] The point is, uh,
wherever the beef came from...
-[Darlene] An animal. A living, alive, feeling animal.
-Well...
[man 1] Whichever animal that was...
-[man 2] Right,
-it doesn't matter. Right.
-[Darlene] It matters to the animal.
[Darlene] It would matter
if the animal were human.
-[Pierre] Darlene.
-[Darlene] Pierre.
-Humans are animals.
-[Pierre] Am I?
[man 1] Wh... what matters
is if the animal is grass fed.
If the nonhuman animal
is grass fed, free range,
open... whatever. Uh,
had other animal friends,
then it had a good time when
I... uh, it, it had a good life.
-No... Yes.
-[Man 1] And that is the point.
-That's right. It is.
-[Pierre] Exactly. Exactly.
-[Darlene] It is? The point of our lives...
-Yes.
- is to have a good time?
-[man 1] Uh, yeah, actually it is. You think so, too.
-[Darlene] Oh... oh!
-[man 1 chuckles] You do, you do too.
-[Pierre] Sure. Quality of life. That's the point.
-[Darlene grunts]
-Absolutely.
-[Pierre] A good quality life.
Absolutely!
-[Thunder rumbles]
-Like this.
-[Man 1] Like this.
Like a nice home-cooked meal
with good food, good people.
-This is what it's all about.
-[Darlene] Wow.
-This is it, right here? We've got it?
-[man 1] This is it.
-Knock on wood.
-Yeah, we got it pretty good.
Knock on wood. [Knocks
table and chuckles] -[chuckles]
Pierre.
[laughs] Jesus.
More wine?
-[Man 1] That's all I'm saying.
-Of course. Of course.
-[Man 1] Okay.
[wine sloshing]
-[glass clinks]
-[Darlene] Sorry. No, sorry...
-[man 1] Me, too.
but you wouldn't mind
being murdered tomorrow?
-[laughs] Darlene!
-Or how about tonight even?
I mean, if you've served
your purpose on earth,
you've reached your pinnacle,
right? You've had a good time.
-Money, friends, steak, grass-fed steak.
-This is brisket.
-[man 1] Okay. I had it good.
-You had it good. So if your time is up...
-[man 1] I had it good until this conversation started.
-[laughter]
[mumbles] -See, it's not the same
thing what you're saying, Darlene.
-Why not? Right.
-[Pierre] You know why not. A cow is not a human being.
-So that's why it's not the same.
-Well, that's why a cow
and a human are not the same.
That's not why it's not the same
-to murder both of them.
-[Pierre scoffs]
[laughs] It's not murder!
-It's not?
-It is not the same!
You murdered two
different things. It's different...
So if you murdered two different people?
-[Pierre] What?
-You murdered two people.
They're different from each other, right?
You don't murder the same person twice.
-You murdered this one, and that one.
-What?
[Darlene] Rich one, poor
one, woman one, man...
-Black one, white one.
-Sane one, crazy one.
Yeah, sane... fine, sane one, crazy one.
You're saying we should
treat that murder differently?
W... we should call murder by some
other name based on the victim?
[Emily] No one is murdering
anyone. [Laughing] Oh, my God!
Well...
-Oh!
-That is not murder, Darlene.
-[Darlene] Of course it is.
-It is not the same.
-[Darlene] Of course it is.
-Well, now we're just talking in circles.
No. Circles would imply some
movement. I'm not moving. I'm right.
-Well, I feel I'm right.
-Oh, I don't feel I'm right.
-I am right.
-Anyway, he didn't murder it.
-He didn't murder anything.
-Okay.
Okay!
He just paid someone to do it for him.
Oh!
-[Emily] Oh, well, everyone does that.
-No.
-Yes, everyone. Everyone. Everyone pays taxes.
And that pays for guns.
So, police officers have guns,
so police officers will kill criminals.
That is not why I pay taxes.
[laughter] -[Emily] But
that's what they go for.
Even then. Even if I
want the criminal dead,
even if I fund his murder, I
don't think I would eat him.
-I would not eat the dead criminals, dead bodies.
-You might.
-No.
-[Laughs]
[Pierre] You would if you had to.
I don't think so, Pierre.
[Emily] Have you ever read Robinson Crusoe?
-[Pierre] What?
-[Emily] What if you were stuck on a desert island?
-Mm-mm.
-[Pierre] Mm, they don't eat people in that book, darling.
-Are you sure?
-Yes. Well, I haven't read it.
[laughter]
-So?
No, he's right.
[Pierre clears throat] -Was
thinking of a different one.
-Gulliver's Travels?
-No.
The...
Shipwrecked.
-No.
No, he's right.
Oh, you've read all those books? [Chuckles]
-What?
-You have read all of those books?
-No.
-[Chuckles]
But if they were about
cannibals, I definitely would have.
Mm!
-[Laughter]
[Darlene laughing] Oh, my God.
Oh, I can never find time
to read anything anymore.
Well, I guess the mail, magazines.
-But is that reading really?
-No.
-[Darlene] Pierre.
-It isn't.
I agree. That's what I'm saying!
-[Darlene] What's the last thing you read?
-Um...
-Yeah. See?
-No, no, no, I read.
Um, actually, I read All Down Day.
What?
-[Darlene] You did?
-Yes.
-[Darlene] You did not!
-What's that?
-[Darlene] Wow! What'd you think?
Sh... uh, Darlene lent it to me.
-Oh. Oh! When?
-[Darlene] I can't believe you read it.
-It's, uh, like a novel?
-Mm...
Uh, it's kind of an experiment.
It's not really genre specific.
-Oh, boy.
-[Pierre] It's, it's good.
-It sounds good.
-It's lyrical.
Like poetry?
-Like lyrical.
-What's the difference?
-I have no idea.
-[Laughter]
-Do you think we would like it?
-[Darlene] Huh?
Me and Emily. Should
we borrow it after Pierre?
-[Darlene] Oh.
-[man 1] You can have it first, Emily.
Mm, no, it's probably not for me.
-[Darlene] Oh.
-Or you would've given it to me, right?
-Uh... -It's artsy, I know it.
[chuckles] It's artsy. Right?
-She's an artist.
-[Man 1] Oh, yeah.
We told you that. Didn't we?
-She is very good.
-[Man 1] I'm sure.
-Mm, she's wonderful.
-[Darlene] You haven't even seen my work.
I know, but I've heard about it from you.
-From Pierre.
-[Darlene] Oh.
-You've seen it, right?
-Um, yes.
Uh, some of it.
-And you liked it. Right?
-Right.
Some of it. [Chuckles]
What kind of art?
-Oh, it's kind of hard to explain.
-Why?
That's also kind of
hard to explain. [Laughs]
What kind of artist is she, Pierre?
[stutters] Good. W... wonderful.
-Like Emily said.
-Like you said.
-I... I do installations.
-Oh.
Like, I install... I build...
-I know what installations are, I do them, too.
-[Emily] Uh-huh?
Yeah, Rick's a carpenter.
-Rick's a designer.
-And a carpenter.
Oh, he makes beautiful furniture.
[gasps] He made this table!
-He did?
-Mm-hmm.
-He did.
-We were looking for something,
and a friend sent us to his studio, and...
[sharply inhales and
exhales] perfect. It was perfect.
-Well... you had me change the stain.
-It was. Yeah, okay.
[chuckling] But, the table...
-It's beautiful. It is.
-Yeah.
-H... how long did it take you?
-Uh, you know, a couple of months.
-My whole life.
-[Darlene] Right. Oh, sorry, should I not?
[Rick] No, you're fine.
I just... it just, it feels great.
[chuckles softly]
-Yeah. It should.
Uh, speaking of, I got the new piece.
-Sorry?
-With me. I brought the, uh...
-It's finished.
-It is?
-He has the piece, Pierre.
-Terrific.
Well, you finished it already? So fast!
Well...
-What, uh, what is it?
-It's a stool.
-It's a bench.
-[Emily] Oh.
-It's a stool.
But more of a stool-ish bench, right?
Mm, nope.
-Mm, like a long seat.
-Like a stool.
Okay. I, I thought we had talked about...
What?
Mm, mm, nothing, I guess. [Chuckles]
-You want to just see it?
-[Emily] Of course.
-No... Not now. We're eating.
-I'll just... I'll just go grab it.
-[Darlene] Mm... oh!
-Ooh, and we've still got dessert.
-[Rick] It's just right outside.
-Oh, and it's raining, I think.
-[Darlene] Is it?
-I think.
-[Rick] So what?
-Well, you'll get wet.
[Rick laughs] So what?
-I love the rain.
-[Pierre] But the piece will get wet.
-I love the rain at night.
-We'll just have to wait it out.
[horn distantly blaring]
Is that your car?
Which?
-[Darlene] The, uh, the truck.
[Rick] Oh. [Laughs] -You
have a gun rack on your truck?
Yeah.
For what?
-For guns.
-[Emily laughs]
[sarcastically laughs] -[Pierre]
She's not used to the country.
-[Emily] Oh, Pierre. Like you are.
-[Pierre] What?
-[Pierre] N... I live here. I mean, well, you're new.
-I live here.
[scoffs] -I remember when I was new.
-Oh, Emily, please.
-What?
[mumbles] You were never new.
Well, yo... you know... you know what I mean.
-[chuckles] Yes, I think I do.
-It was a compliment.
You, you know, you're...
wise.
[laughs]
-Is that funny?
-Okay if I open another bottle?
-Absolutely.
-Oh.
-Oh, God. I h... I have to drive.
Mm, what?
No, you've got to stay for dessert.
-Oh, God, I can't. I'm stuffed.
-What?
Oh... [laughs]
-Oh, God.
[laughter]
[Pierre clears throat]
[ominous music]
-To our hosts.
-To our guests.
[clinking]
Mm. This is, this is interesting.
-Do you know what that comes from?
-[Darlene] Wine?
-No. Toasts. Toasting.
-It's French...
It's... it was to stop people
poisoning each other.
-[Darlene] What?
-[Pierre] Yes, it's true. Yeah.
-No.
-[Pierre] No, no, yes, yes.
Everyone would bring their glasses
-to the middle of the table.
-W... when?
Whenever. Whenever. Olden...
[chuckles] But... So
your glasses are together,
and then you, you know,
enthusiastically you just sort of...
And, so, some of the wine
from everyone's glasses
would slosh over into everyone's glasses...
I don't think you could use glasses for...
and then you'd know
you were safe.
Why?
-'Cause everyone's sharing.
-It doesn't seem that safe to me.
-Everyone's drinks are mixed.
But the glasses...
-It seems like a lot of germs.
Well, this is before they knew about germs.
[Darlene groans] -You're
not gonna die from germs.
-Yes, you are.
-[Darlene] You are.
Not as quick as you'd die from poison.
-[Pierre] Thank you.
-[Emily chuckles]
No, I still don't, I still
don't think it's right.
Uh, that's a lot of spilled
wine. [Laughs] -[Darlene laughs]
Couldn't they all just
drink from the same bottle?
-Yes!
-Or, or not poison each other?
Oh. No.
-Human nature.
-Is to poison each other?
-Unfortunately. What? I said, "Unfortunately."
-[Darlene] Emily!
I'm not happy about it.
-Maybe we should skip dessert.
-[Emily laughs] What?
-[laughing] No, you can't.
-I really... I think I have to, Emily.
-I cannot eat anything else.
-[Whining] No!
-I can always eat.
-[Emily] Oh, good.
I should've been one of those, uh,
-professional eaters.
-What?
You know, they do
contests, like Coney Island.
-Yeah, like with pies.
-Those are so wasteful.
-Yeah, or hot dogs.
-That's what we're having for dessert.
-So wasteful!
-Hot dogs?
-Pie, Pierre.
-Everything fun is wasteful.
-That's why it's fun.
-[Emily] I made strawberry whip
-and chocolate chestnut.
-[Pierre] Chocolate chestnuts?
-You made them?
-Chestnut pie?
Mm, it's a very rich.
Oh, I should've gone to class today.
-I should have gone to yoga.
-[Darlene] Oh.
[sighs] Now I'm gonna miss it.
Another two weeks on top
of eating like a...
Ugh, like a, like a pig. Like a horse.
-[Rick] No, no. Horses are vegetarians.
-[laughs]
-[Darlene] What... why are you gonna miss?
-Mm?
-[Darlene] Why can't you?
-Oh, I'm going to Chicago.
Mm, you know, they
probably have yoga there.
[Emily] What?
-[Pierre] In Chicago.
You, you could probably
find a place that hosts a class
within the limits of that
major American city.
No. No, I like the studio
here. I'm attached to it.
-Mm-hmm. Emily, please.
-I am!
When was the last time you were...
-Wh... Excuse me!
I was gonna go, I was gonna
go today! I was in the car.
But then I checked the schedule,
and I saw that it was power yoga.
-Power yoga? What's power yoga?
-[Darlene] Oh, yeah.
"That sounds very aggressive", I thought. Very...
-[Darlene] Yeah.
Was it?
-[Darlene] No.
Oh. Well, from the name.
From the name, it sounds
like it was meant to be.
Nothing is meant to be
any... we're not fatalists.
[laughter]
-[Emily] What?
-I said we're not fatalists.
What?
I think he means fatalism. Like, when you believe...
-No, I know what fatalism is.
-I don't.
-[Chuckles]
It's...
just something that
sounds bad, but it isn't.
-[Rick] Like power yoga.
-[Pierre] Or chestnut pie.
-Pierre. Stop picking on me.
-[Pierre] What?
-I made this whole meal.
-What?
-I think it sounds good...
-I... [stutter] I wasn't...
[clears throat]
-[Emily] Thank you.
picking on you. What... w...
Was I picking on her?
-Don't drag our guests into this.
-My gosh.
She's so sensi... All
right. All right, I'm sorry.
I thought it was still acceptable
for a man to make a joke,
to, to, to ex... express his opinions
on dessert in his own home.
-Call me old fashioned.
-No.
-Emily.
-You're not old fashioned. You're old.
-I'm not old.
-Only old people say that.
-No, I ran three miles today. Do old people...
-Wow. Did you?
-Ye... Yes!
-In a row?
-See? See? You're picking on me!
-[laughs] Please!
At least I ran. At least I
didn't skip super yoga.
-Power yoga.
-How would you know what it's called?
It wasn't that great. You know,
you didn't really miss anything.
[sighs]
-Did Jason lead it?
-[Darlene clicks tongue] Uh, yeah.
-I missed Jason.
-[Pierre] Who's Jason?
-[Emily] He's a yoga instructor.
-[Pierre] But who is he?
Do I know him? He, he lives here?
I... I think he lives over the bluffs.
[Rick] He lives over the bluffs?
He comes all the way in for yoga?
-It's just twice a week.
-Wait. Wait.
Why do you know where he
lives, Darlene? [Gasps softly]
-[Darlene] Emily.
-Oh! Jason!
[Pierre] Jason what?
-[Emily] Is that something?
-No.
-Emily, no.
-[Emily] W... why not?
-He's very striking.
-He asked me for a ride one day.
-That's it. That's all. And I said no.
-And?
-[sighs] Darlene!
-I didn't have time to drive all the way out there.
-It is pretty far.
-Yeah. I mean, I felt bad.
-He doesn't have a car?
-How are you ever gonna meet anyone?
-[Darlene] Oh!
-You are hopeless.
-You are so hopeless.
-[mumbles] Wait. Why doesn't he have a car?
-How does he live?
-Jesus, Pierre! Maybe he has a bicycle.
[Darlene] Actually, I think he h... has a...
-[both] What?
-[Darlene] Well, I think he has...
What?
- A skateboard.
[Emily chuckles]
-What?
-No, no, no! I know, I... I know.
-[cross talk]
[Pierre] Oh, then he doesn't need a car.
I mean, if he has a skateboard.
-Don't be nasty, Pierre.
-Don't you be nasty.
Don't try to set up a friend
with some, uh, homeless man.
-[Darlene] He's not homeless.
-Of course he's not.
Although, you never did see his house.
-Oh, stop.
-We'll find you someone better.
[Darlene chuckles]
-[Emily sighs]
He's fi... I'm fine.
-I don't need to be set up.
-[Pierre] Exactly.
[Emily] You'll meet someone
and be perfectly happy.
[Pierre] She doesn't need to meet
someone to be perfectly happy.
-What? How can you say that?
-I can say it because I think it.
-[Darlene] Guys.
-You think people can be perfectly happy and be alone?
-[Darlene] I'm not n... alone.
-Well, you think people can be perfectly happy and be together?
[scoffs]
[thunder rumbling in distance]
-Emily. We still got...
-[Emily] I'm getting dessert.
- dinner plates all over the table.
-[Emily] So clear them.
-We can help.
-Y... yeah.
No, no. No, thank you.
[sighs]
[Rick] Why are Mom and Dad so mad?
[Darlene chuckles] Stop!
[Rick whispers] What did you do?
-What did you do?
-Nothing.
-I'm a very good boy.
-[Cutlery clatters]
Should we leave?
No way.
I'm getting some of that pie.
Seriously.
I think it's weirder if we just take off.
[sighs]
We can give them a couple minutes, yeah.
We can sit here...
pretend to enjoy each other's company.
[indistinct chatter distantly]
[cutlery clattering]
-You think you'll stay?
-You just told me I have to.
-I mean, here, in town.
-Oh. Yeah.
I hope so. If I can afford it. [Chuckles]
-Yeah.
-I don't think my installations pay as well as yours. [Laughs]
-You'd be surprised.
-Oh, are they more than $0?
'Cause that's the going rate
for most of mine. [Chuckles]
Does it matter what you charge if...
people don't pay?
-Oh, deadbeats.
Deadbeats everywhere you look.
No.
They'll pay you for the, uh...
-Yeah, we'll see.
Last time, it took them six months.
[whispers] No! They have the money.
Th... that's why they have the money.
-It's how the rich stay rich.
-[whine pouring]
-[Darlene sighs] God.
-I can't chase them.
[smacks lips] It's okay. I'm fast.
[laughs]
And...
I know where they
live. [Mimics slashing]
[laughs]
-[chuckles]
[dramatic music]
Where do you live?
I h... have a cabin.
[chuckles]
-Yeah? Where?
In the woods.
Yeah. Where?
[chuckles] Sorry, off, um...
off Pitts And Way.
-By the fire tower.
-Mm-hmm.
It's a good spot.
-Kind of isolated.
-Yeah, kind of... no, very.
Yes. And, you know, it's funny, I
came out here for, uh, peace and quiet,
-but it's not actually that quiet.
-[chuckles]
I'm by myself at night, and
I think, "I'm not by myself",
-what the fuck was that?" [chuckles] Mm.
-Mm, you're spooked. Get a dog.
-No. Too distracting.
-Get a boyfriend.
-Mm, no.
-[Laughter]
[horn distantly blaring]
I had a dog when I was a
kid. I had a German shepherd.
-She was actually... It's very...
-It was a she?
-Huh?
-Your dog was a she? You had a she-dog?
-I had a female dog.
-[thunder rumbling in distance]
Yes. [Chuckles]
-[chuckles]
Uh, I always think of dogs
are guys and cats are girls.
I know that doesn't work out, but
look at them. Cats are very feminine.
Yeah.
And a German shepherd, that's not a guy?
-That's a guy. It's a man.
-It's a dog.
It's a man's dog.
[chuckles] Anyway.
Anyway, yeah. Uh...
When we were on vacation...
[chuckles] God, this was terrible. But, uh,
we were at this mountain house.
Must have belonged to my parents' friend...
I can't remember. But, uh, it had
a lot of space around the house,
like a few acres. And down the street,
there's this sheep farm.
And I was nine or ten.
-Young.
-Young, yeah. Not done with having my dog.
-Oh.
-So... Right. So, the dog is a dog,
and there's 100, 200 sheep down the block.
-And he got out. She.
-Ye... Uh, she.
[chuckling] Yeah, she
gets out. And it's night.
And it should've been fine.
I mean, there's fences, obviously,
and the street is really
long. It's a country road.
It's like a quarter mile down to the farm.
A quarter mile for a dog is
like... [mimics whooshing]
It's... Yeah. So she's out.
She runs, right? She's running,
and it's night, and the
dirt road, and the moon.
She gets to the farm.
And she just goes for it.
All these animals, six or seven.
She hopped the fence.
And in the morning, they found them.
All these sheep, like, ripped up,
but not all dead yet. Just,
like, ripped open a lot of them,
at the throat.
And she's still in the pen with them.
[chuckles softly] Like, not bothered.
She walked right over to the keeper,
they said, followed him
around, lamb to lamb.
At one of them as he's
inspecting it, she even...
licked it, like, very sweet.
Like a nurse.
And like, "Oh, certainly she
hadn't done anything wrong."
They called us and we
went to pick her up. But...
when we got there, they
said, "Oh, no! No, no, no."
She is going to animal control.
She has to be put down because
"she's killed all these
sheep and she's a danger."
-[Ricky] Oh.
-And I thought, "No." I was like,
"No, you are the danger. You, the farmer,
are the danger to the sheep.
And nobody is putting you to sleep."
I...
-Right? "You slit their throats on a regular basis."
You slit their throats for money.
"-That's the danger."
-[chuckles] Okay.
Okay, the farmer does it for money,
and the dog does it for...
-Yeah, like, for fun.
-[chuckles] Jesus.
-No, kind of.
Is fun a better reason than money?
I'm saying... it's not that
different for the farmer.
Money is fun. Money is fun.
-Money is necessary.
-Money is not necessary.
Not that kind of money. Not blood money.
Okay, okay.
-Sorry.
-No.
Well, it's very sad.
It was.
I'm sorry your dog died.
-My dog got killed.
-Right.
[Darlene] Just for being herself.
Sometimes that's very dangerous.
Okay!
-[Darlene] Hi!
[dramatic music]
Thought we'd switch to white. Yeah?
Or... we don't have to,
but these are both terrific
-and they're already cold.
-[Darlene] Then, yeah. Terrific.
[Rick] Terrific. Down the hatch.
Yeah, we could've stuck with red
-but the only one we had has a parrot on the label...
-[grunts]
- and I just can't trust that.
-Oh.
-Was it like a, a pirate parrot?
-[Pierre] Aren't they all?
Sorry, I think I brought that one.
Oh! Uh, I'll go get it.
[chuckling] No! No, no, I
don't know anything about wine.
-What's there to know?
-Right.
-It's probably awful.
-Why? Is it cheap? Is it old?
Uh, I think old would
make it better, right?
-Old would make it good.
-Alcohol makes it good.
[laughs] -Alcohol makes everything good.
-Mm. Debatable.
-[Darlene] Let's just have one of these.
Great. Start with the...
[inhales sharply] Soave?
-[Rick] Ooh, start with the Soave. Always.
-[Darlene chuckles]
[Pierre clears throat]
Oops. [Chuckles]
-[Darlene chuckles]
[clears throat]
[Pierre] Oops. [Tsks]
[clears throat]
[chuckles and grunts]
-You want some help?
-Nope. No.
[inhales and exhales]
[pops]
-Oh, shit.
-Stupid!
-I do that all the time.
[laughter]
-Do you?
I'm terrible at opening
wine. I was a terrible server.
-I can open a bottle of wine with a shoe.
-I was really bad.
-Hard heeled shoe or a shoelace.
-What? Really?
-I'll show you.
-It... it's fine.
[stutters] Thank you.
My tables used to open
their bottles themselves.
-[Pierre] No.
-Yeah. Sometimes. I mean, I would try.
I would get started, and then,
they would have to intervene.
Like, they'd lean in and
grab the bottle, smile, and...
-Where were you working? God!
-[Darlene] No.
-Oh, brats.
-No, it was smart. It was good wine.
I thought you don't know about wine?
-I know what we were charging for it.
-Mm.
I didn't realize you waited tables.
-[Darlene] Yeah, well, didn't everyone?
-[Rick and Pierre] No.
-[chuckles] Really? Never?
-Nope.
Oh.
-Oh, I can't trust you!
-[Pierre] You can't?
No, everyone needs to work in a restaurant.
Everyone who eats in a restaurant
needs to work in a restaurant.
-Alas.
-[Rick] I worked at a summer camp.
Not the same.
-And I was a lifeguard.
-It's not the same.
-I work now.
-Yeah, so do I.
Yeah?
[Darlene scoffs and
laughs] -[Pierre grunts]
Finally! [Chuckles]
-[Darlene chuckle]
-Sh... uh, should we get Emily?
-[Pierre] Here we go.
Should we get Emily?
Uh, no.
-Well, maybe she needs help with the pies?
-No, she's, she's lying down.
-What?
-[Pierre] No, she, she's fine. She, she has a...
-Is she all right?
-Well, she has a headache.
-Oh, God.
-[Whispers] Yeah.
-[stutter] W... we should go.
-No, no, no, no.
-Yeah. Yes, of course.
-No, no, no, no. Darlene!
We just opened this bottle.
I'm not gonna drink the whole thing
myself. You're not gonna make me drink
a whole bottle of wine...
[chuckles] by myself?
And I wanna talk to you about that book.
-[Darlene] Oh, yeah.
-I, I read it. I'd, I'd,
I'd like to discuss it.
-Yeah, I just don't wanna bother Emily.
-[Pierre] Y...
-She has a headache.
-[Pierre] She does.
-So I don't wanna disturb her.
-We won't.
She's in the back bedroom.
You know what, you can't
hear anything up there.
And we can speak quietly, can't we?
About a book?
I don't know.
These casual chats about
post-modern literature
-can get pretty heated.
-[Darlene laughs]
They can, actually.
It's not postmodern.
-[Rick] Oh, no?
-It's post-post.
-Sorry, I haven't read it yet.
-[Darleen] Yeah...
-[Rick] Don't ruin the ending.
-[Darlene] Okay.
-Doesn't really have an ending.
-Spoiler alert!
[laughs]
You know, you don't have to stay.
-What?
-If you're really planning on reading it
and you don't want to...
-No, no, no.
No, no, no, I'll stay.
I don't want you to have to
finish a whole bottle by yourself.
[Pierre scoffs]
You know, I'm just gonna run to the...
[Pierre] Up the stairs,
first landing on the left.
Yeah. I'll, I'll be quiet.
[whispering] So will we.
[horn distantly blaring]
Hey.
You want me to leave?
Not necessarily.
[softly chuckles]
[wine pouring]
[clinking]
[wine pouring]
[cork squeaking]
[squeaks and pops]
[wine pouring]
[wine pouring]
[Pierre exhales]
-[Rick burps]
[deeply inhales and exhales]
[Darlene] Hi.
Uh-oh. What are you guys doing?
[Pierre clears throat] -Just, um...
talking.
[Darlene] Uh-huh, about what?
You, I guess.
-Uh-oh.
-[Pierre] No, nothing bad.
I bet.
[chuckles] -[thunder distantly rumbles]
-[Darlene] When are you going to Chicago?
-Hmm?
-[Darlene] When are you guys leaving?
-[clicks tongue]
-Oh, I'm not going.
-[Darlene] Oh.
-Emily's going.
-All by herself?
Well, no. She'll have a whole
plane full of people with her.
[chuckling] -She'll have the whole city.
-I like Chicago.
-[Darlene] Yeah.
-[Pierre] I don't.
-Is that why you're not going?
-'Cause you don't like it?
-[Pierre] Mm, no.
-'Cause you don't like Emily?
-[Darlene] Hey.
Or no, you like her, just not as
much as you don't like Chicago.
-I don't like flying.
-[Darlene] Really?
-Yeah, it's dangerous.
-[Darlene] No, it's not.
-It's unnatural.
-[Both] No, it's not.
-[chuckles] Birds fly.
-[Pierre] I'm not a bird.
No, you're a human. You're a human
being whose human being friends
have figured out how to fly,
and will let you come along.
-For a price.
-They're not my friends.
And they've only figured
it out until they haven't.
-Planes crash.
-Not really. Not a lot.
-Birds crash. They must, all the time, into windows.
-[Pierre] What?
Yeah, yeah. Another man-made problem.
-Windows?
-[Pierre] We're destroying the earth!
Well, that's true. [Chuckles]
-No, it isn't.
-[Darlene] What?
[scoffs] We're not
destroying it, we're using it.
-Oh, boy.
-Like it's using us.
Um...
-It is, for fertilizer, for farming.
Well, it doesn't need to be farmed.
-We need it to be farmed.
-For protection.
-We are not protecting the earth!
-Speak for yourself.
Ye... Uh, I am, I do.
We're constantly protecting the earth.
We... All, all the regulations and parks,
an... and there's that
huge... uh, what's it called?
That, uh, program...
Mm, where we scan the, the solar...
[sighs] for asteroids, gi... that are
flying through space and might collide?
-What?
-[Rick] It... it's a program. Program.
It's, it's a program, like
a lookout we're running
where we stop things
before they hit the earth
and, and there are missiles.
If we see something, we'll send
them up there first and blow them up.
-I think that's a movie.
-It is a movie!
It, it, it was a movie. It's
also real. It's a real program.
It is! In space.
-Don't look at me, I don't even like airplanes.
-[laughs]
Okay. I, I don't know that
much about outer space,
-so I can't say if what you're saying is true or not.
-It is.
-But even if it is, even if it is...
-It is.
we would be doing those
things to protect ourselves,
-not the planet, so, I... Oh!
-But we are the planet! We are the planet.
We come from the planet, literally.
We're its soil, its cells,
we are its product.
-You believe in evolution, right?
-Yeah. Do you?
We're not some separate alien invaders.
It's not the earth and all its animals,
and then humans too. Also, humans
are animals, are a part of the whole...
[sighs] When people say... it is so
egotistical when they say "man-made,"
"Man-made stuff." Okay, man made stuff.
Well, nature made man.
Nature made man to make stuff!
-To make plastic and cement...
-[laughs]
and houses and planes and nuclear bombs.
-And crazy arguments?
-Sure.
-Okay.
-It is okay. It's all okay. It should be.
-Do, do bears feel bad for being bears?
-[Darlene] I don't know.
Do dogs feel bad? Does your dog feel bad...
-[Darlene] Hey!
-You have a dog?
-No.
You see what I'm saying, though?
-No.
-We are so down on ourselves
a... as a species, as part of...
After all the things we've
done, everything that we've seen
-and made, and made better, made faster.
-Mm, not always better.
A... all the inventions we've
invented, all the buildings we've built!
-The cars we've carved.
-[Darlene] All the wars we've started.
-Yeah, yes. And all the wars we've ended...
-[upbeat jazz music playing]
and prevented and survived.
-[Darlene] Not all of us.
-Not all of us started them.
[Darlene] No. The ones with the guns did.
[sighs] Or the ones with the money.
[Darlene] Well, I don't have either of those, so...
-Uh-huh.
-[Darlene] I don't.
-[Pierre] Mm, that's okay.
-I'm sure you do something wrong.
-[Darlene] Oh, yeah, daily.
[Pierre laughs]
-Nightly.
But I see now. Now I see. I have to do it.
I have no choice. Nature makes me do it.
-[Rick] All right.
-I have to not floss.
-I have to like Phil Collins.
-[Pierre] No.
I have to love him. You
have to hate Chicago.
-[Pierre] I don't hate it.
-With all its natural skyscrapers,
-its natural elevated trains, its natural thick pizza.
-[Pierre] That's not pizza.
-It's like a wildlife refuge.
-Yeah, yeah, full of wild fucking animals.
[scoffs] -Don't talk
that way about my wife.
[laughs]
It's not an insult.
I think animals are great.
We could learn a lot from them.
Well, I thought we are them, you're saying.
And we could learn how to accept that.
We could learn how to be ourselves.
Say what we think, take what
we want, know what we want.
-Yeah, good luck with that.
-You don't know what you want?
[rain splattering]
[music continues]
I know I want another drink.
[deeply inhales] Darlene?
Uh...
I'm good. I have to drive.
[Pierre] No, you know what?
-Just stay over.
-[Chuckles]
-[Pierre mumbles] Drive tomorrow.
-Tomorrow, I have to work.
[scoffs]
What?
[chuckles] Nothing.
I do actually work.
-You know, it is actually work, what I do.
-No, no, I, I, I know.
And you know that there's
work, and there's work.
-Who could argue?
-Don't get upset.
No, h... no, he's right. Darlene, I mean,
we can't all be lifeguards.
[chuckles] I mean, there's a,
there's a test, isn't there?
Like an obstacle course in a,
-in a, in a pool? Or, or did you work at the beach?
-[Rick] No, it was a pool.
Okay.
What do you do for money, Pierre?
-Oh, okay.
-You have a job?
You ever had a job?
You just, what, find it?
-[Pierre] Mm-hmm.
-Take it, steal it?
-Sure. Yeah, good for you too.
-Wow, good for you.
-Yeah?
-Yeah. How else am I gonna buy all this wine
for you to drink?
-[Rick] Oh, thanks.
How else am I gonna
pay for all your hard work?
All your hard, real work, making...
Hand-making beautiful stool benches
that you keep stacked
up out there on your car...
-Are you gonna pay me? When?
- in your monster truck.
-Mm, we'll settle up. Yeah, we'll settle up before you go.
-Yeah?
-That's gonna be pretty soon. I have to give Darlene...
-All right.
- a ride home. She has to work tomorrow.
-Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa...
-I'm fine.
-Oh, now you don't have to work?
-No, I don't need a ride!
-But you drank all that wine.
-Well... you've had more than me.
-No.
But, but you have too.
You have. So have I.
-All right. You drive.
-[Darlene mumbles]
No, just... yo... you can both stay.
-We have plenty of room.
-So does my truck.
Well, you're not gonna sleep in your truck.
We could. Pop the sunroof, watch the stars.
[shouts] No! You can't!
[rain splattering]
It's raining!
And the, the, the... piece...
-[Rick] The stool.
- is in there, is in there. That must take up some...
-You know what? I'll go get it. I'll bring it in.
-No, but it...
But it's still...
-No, I think it stopped.
Yeah, stopped. Be right back.
Listen, I don't think you
should drive with him.
-I know.
-I think you should just stay.
[scoffs]
-Pierre, I don't need to.
-I know you don't need to, but it would be...
[Rick] Did Emily take your jacket?
-[Darlene] Huh?
-[Rick] When you came in, did she take your jacket?
Uh, I think so, yeah.
[Rick] Do you know where she put it?
Um...
-Did you check the hall closet?
[Rick] Yes. My keys are in my jacket.
-My jacket is not in the closet.
-Okay.
Maybe upstairs in the gue... guest room.
-Okay. I'll find it.
-Wait! [Scoffs]
He is so aggressive.
[chuckles] -I don't
understand people like that.
Well, you don't have to understand him.
You have to pay him.
-What?
-That's why he's upset.
I... What? I have to pay him for what?
For the, the, the, the, the...
-Yes.
Wait, what's he saying? He... h... he said...
-He's complaining about us?
-He's not complaining.
He didn't even make us what we asked
for. He didn't even make us what we need.
-Oh, nobody needs a bench, Pierre.
-[scoffs] Nobody needs a stool.
-Yeah.
-You shouldn't believe everything people say, Darlene.
-You've just met that man.
-What?
You don't... you can't trust every... Oh...
-You introduced us.
-No... No, no, no, no, no. No.
-You set us up.
You're, you're not set up.
[stutter] Th... no, that's Emily.
[laughs] -I have no interest in that.
I have no interest in setting you up.
[scoffs] I've absolutely
no interest in, in that.
What?
-[Laughs]
You look so small right now.
Sitting there.
I'm not.
Emily's leaving...
for two weeks for Chicago.
[whispers] Right.
Well, maybe while she's in Chicago...
uh... [clears throat] maybe we can talk.
About what?
[chuckles]
About the book?
-Yes. Yes, exactly. About the book.
-Mm.
-You liked it?
-I liked it so much.
[both exhale]
-Is that right?
I don't know.
-Don't you want me to like it?
-I... probably shouldn't.
Oh! No, no, no, no.
You just, you got a little...
Oh. [Chuckles]
-Oh.
-What? [Chuckles]
No, it, it's just... I... I thought
it was a piece of... something.
[shakily exhales]
-It's not?
-No.
It's something else.
I can't.
No?
You can't.
You can't run on me.
[deeply inhales]
You don't know what I can do.
Hey.
Hi! Sorry. Hi.
-Did you find your jacket?
-Um, no,
-no, I did not find my jacket.
-Did you check the kitchen?
Mm-hmm. I checked
everywhere. You all right?
Yeah... [chuckles] yeah, of course. Yeah.
-I think it's time to go.
-I'd agree.
-You drive me, all right?
-[Pierre] She's not comfortable with that.
-She's already said it.
-She's fine.
She does not feel comfortable.
Okay, then, uh, how about Emily drives us?
-What? No.
-Why not?
-She's sick. Of course.
-Is she?
See, that's strange. Um, that is strange,
'cause she isn't upstairs.
-What?
-And she isn't in here,
or in there, or anywhere
as far as I can tell.
-She's in the back bedroom.
-No.
You went in there?
-I was looking for my coat.
-Emily. Emmy!
I thought you said she
couldn't hear us up there.
-[Pierre] She'd hear that.
-Mm, right,
-exactly.
-[Pierre] Excuse me.
-Uh, we should go now.
-What?
Uh, I mean it. Right now.
No. I wanna make sure she's all right.
She's not all right. She's missing.
Well, I don't think she's missing.
-She's not here.
-It's not the same thing.
-Come on, would you stop... I...
-Can you please not grab at me?
-I'm not, I'm not grabbing at you.
-Don't just put your hands on...
-Wow! Well, I'm trying to help you.
-Did you...
You didn't see her? She
didn't come down here?
-[Darlene] No. Maybe she went for a walk.
-[scoffs] Come on.
-In the middle of the night?
-[Darlene] It's not the middle of the night.
-In the rain?
-It's stopped. You said.
[Pierre] Did you say something to her?
[Rick] I didn't see her. She wasn't there.
-Did you do something?
-Did you?
-[Darlene] Well, maybe she... Oh.
-[Pierre] What?
No, nothing. Her car, it's parked in.
[Rick] Uh-huh.
-Maybe we should call someone.
-Who?
-I don't know, the police?
-Darlene.
-[Darlene] Maybe we should. It's late.
-Darlene.
-I'm just... Whoa!
-Stop it!
[cell phone buzzing]
I was just calling her phone.
[buzzing continues]
[Pierre] Guess she didn't take it with her.
[Darlene] Yeah.
-T... take it with her where?
-[Pierre] I have no idea.
-I, I didn't hear her leave.
-Maybe she didn't.
-[Pierre] Oh, would you stop it?
-You want her to have left?
I want you to stop
implying that I slit her throat
-and stuffed her in a closet.
-I'm not implying that. I checked all the closets.
-[Pierre] Wow. You are a real piece of work.
-Says the pot to the pan.
-[Pierre] That's not the phrase.
-That's not the problem.
-I don't have a problem!
-[Rick] That's your fucking problem.
-You don't even know when you're in trouble.
-He's not in trouble.
-[Rick] You either.
-Emily's the one in trouble.
-[Pierre] No, she isn't.
-[Rick] How do you know?
Well, how do you know
she is? You seem very sure.
-Two and two, buddy.
-No, I'm not your buddy.
[laughs]
-Would you just shut up?
-Ooh, there he is.
Hey, get the fuck out of my house!
Sure. Find my fucking jacket.
I don't think anyone
should leave until Emily...
Can we please just calm
down? Just calm down!
Think. When is the last time...
-Him. Him.
-[Pierre] No.
-In the kitchen.
-Yeah, right, the kitchen. Okay.
-Place with all the knives.
The place with the blender...
-And then? She's in the kitchen, and then?
And then, she went upstairs.
-Mm, she went upstairs.
-[Pierre] She did.
[sighing] And then?
-[Pierre] And then,
you went upstairs.
-[Darlene] Oh.
-Y... you went upstairs too.
-Did you see her?
-No.
[Pierre] Well, you were up there for...
Wha... I went to the landing. Pierre!
And then I went up and she wasn't there.
Well... or...
Oh, my God. Or, or, or maybe she is there.
Y... Uh, she's, she's still there. Yeah,
she's, she's hiding under the bed.
She's listening to us through the floor.
She couldn't hear us through the floor.
[Rick] Oh, I bet she's got some great ears.
Emily. Emily, if you can hear us,
you got great ears. Great...
-Great everything actually.
-You're not funny.
-[Rick] I'm not kidding. You got a beautiful wife.
-Stop it.
-Had a beautiful wife.
-[Darlene] What's, what's wrong with you?
Um, I'm not the one
angling to spend the night
-in this fucked up house.
-It's not fucked up.
[Ricky] I'm not the one siding with the guy
who'd clearly like to be rid of his wife.
[Pierre] Who should she side with?
The complete stranger? The, the brute?
-Oh, that's me, huh? Huh?
-The, the leather jacket, chainsaw, target practice.
-I... I don't need practice. I know what I'm doing.
-I'm sure.
-You should be.
-I... I'm sure you shoot something, knife something.
No problem. Kill it,
skin it, set it on fire.
I have no doubt. I'm just surprised
you feel that recommends you
-in this situation.
-What recommends me?
I'm surprised you wear that all so proudly.
What recommends me is I, I
don't care enough about your wife
-or you, or your wife...
-[Pierre] You care about squirrels?
-I don't even know you, man.
-He shoots squirrels.
-I shoot deer.
-[Pierre] Much better!
He shoots deer because he
cares about them so much!
-[Ricky] More than I care about you.
-[Pierre] No, with us,
-you just care about the money.
-[Ricky] Yeah.
[Pierre] Just care about who has the money!
[Ricky] Well, it's not
the people who should.
Oh, so you came to what, collect?
[chuckling] I, I came
to have dinner. Jesus.
I came because I was fucking invited.
-Not by me.
-[Ricky] That's clear. Thanks.
Well, so maybe you should be on your way.
-Look, he can't.
-No, I can't.
I can't. I am gonna walk.
-No, no, no, wait.
-Bye!
-[Pierre] No, no, no. Don't.
-[Darlene] Wait. Wait, wait, wait.
But since I'm pretty sure
I won't be invited back real soon,
let's handle that payment issue.
-True to form. Oh...
-Let's handle that transaction.
I'd love to, love to, Rick,
but, mm, don't have my
checkbook on me at the moment.
-[Rick] I'll wait.
-Uh, could be anywhere in this place.
[laughs] -C... could be upstairs.
And we know how hard
it is to find stuff there.
He's joking! You hear how, how he jokes?
I'm no businessman. You got me.
But maybe I shouldn't pay for something
I haven't actually received yet.
-Just, just as a rule of thumb.
-It's in your fucking driveway!
But I don't need it in my fucking driveway!
And I don't need your
fucking car there either!
Oh. Oh, sorry. Hate for
my stuff to get in the way.
-Me, too. I hate it. I hate it so much.
-Yeah?
-Well, how about I move it for you, then?
-[clattering]
-[Darlene yells] Jesus!
-[indistinct shouting]
That's not yours!
[clattering] -[Darlene yells and mumbles]
-That's paid for.
-[Rick] How about you keep the car
and I keep this?
-[Clattering]
-I'll keep this.
-Okay, fine.
[loud clattering]
-[Darlene yells]
[thud]
-Oh, my God! Stop!
[panting] -[Darlene]
Ar... are you all right?
-Yes.
-[Gasping]
But now you can call the police.
-You sure fucking can!
-[Pierre] Tell them there's been an assault.
Yeah, an assault with a deadly table.
Tell them that there's
been an attempted robbery.
Tell them there's been an actual robbery.
And tell them there's a
guy who misplaced his wife.
They'll love that. Not as
much as he loves it, but...
-Stop.
-[Rick] You know I'm right.
Wife disappears. It's always the husband.
Yeah, except for all the
times it's the psychopath.
-You're bleeding. N... no, you.
-[sighs] I am?
-[Ricky] Oh. It's, it's fine.
-[Darlene] It's not fine.
-Uh, don't, don't, don't do that.
-[Rick] Why not?
-Because it's my napkin.
-I cut myself on your glass.
-[Darlene] You have to clean it. You h... have to clean it out.
-I, I...
Come on, come on.
No.
[sighs]
[dramatic music]
[grunts]
[sighs]
[Darlene] Do you have the, um...
[Pierre] What?
[ominous music]
-Hi.
-[Darlene sighs]
I need the wine opener.
Um...
why?
[Darlene] Uh, it's a pretty deep cut,
I wanna disinfect it.
With wine?
Yes. With alcohol.
We used to do it all the
time at the restaurant.
[sighs] Okay.
Um... [clears throat] Just...
-[bottle softly clunks]
-Here. Just use this.
[clicks tongue] No, you use
red. Red has the higher alcohol.
Parrot red?
-Yes, Pierre.
-'Cause that'll probably kill him outright.
Huh. Um.
Oh!
Here we go.
Thanks.
[softly] My pleasure.
This is how all your
dinner parties turn out?
Of course.
By design.
I hope you had a good time.
Yeah.
Well, that's what life's all about.
[Rick] I think I found the vodka.
It's in the closet. A
bottle marked "vodka."
So, I'm, I'm just gonna...
I'm just gonna use this.
Hey!
-[Gasps] Oh, my God. [Gasps]
[Rick] Hey.
Hey.
[Emily] Hey.
That's my jacket.
-[Emily] Hmm?
-[Rick] We were looking for it.
Oh.
We were looking for you.
[horn distantly blaring]
Oh.
I took a bath.
I, I mean a walk.
It's raining.
-Yeah.
-And I couldn't find my umbrella.
-Emily.
-I lent it to someone.
I lent it to someone.
-That's right, it was you.
-I...
I, I...
-It's okay.
I should have more than one umbrella.
[Darlene] Um...
-I can afford it.
Or, of course, you could just get your own.
Are you all right? Are you hurt?
Am I hurt?
[Pierre] Do you want to, uh, change?
Do you want me to change?
Do you...
want me to change?
Only if you want to.
Only if you want me to.
[laughs] Just kidding. I can't
change. I don't have any other clothes.
I mean, I only have my clothes,
and that's not really different.
I think you've seen them all on me by now.
This is a terrific coat. I
hope I haven't ruined it.
-That's all right.
-[Emily] We can get it cleaned.
Looks clean enough.
-Looks like it just went through a car wash.
-[laughing] Right.
Right.
Well, next time, I'll get it dry cleaned.
[Emily chuckles]
Good one, Emily.
Thanks, Rick. I always liked you.
Yeah?
Your husband doesn't.
[Emily] My husband doesn't like anybody,
-except Darlene.
-All right.
She's likable.
She is. She's so...
[deeply inhales] nice smile,
lot of, lot of pluck, a lot of righteous...
Sticks up for the hopeless.
I mean, not all the hopeless. Not me.
Just the ones that don't
speak English. Speak at all.
-Maybe she doesn't like feedback.
-Please, Emily.
Oh! She doesn't.
Doesn't like feedback!
I don't blame you. It can be brutal.
Say, for instance, you cook a
beautiful, big meal for someone,
and instead of them
telling you they enjoy it,
they say straight out they don't.
[sharply inhales] Oof! [Scoffs] It hurts.
"Exactly", they say, "hurts the animal".
But I'm an animal too.
Aren't I an animal too?
So what about my feelings?
Right. Agree. I was just saying that mysel...
-You wouldn't ruin a cow's
dinner party, would you?
-You wouldn't kiss a cow's husband.
-Right.
I just... I don't think that
you can pick and choose.
Wasn't that your whole point? You shouldn't
pick and choose who you're nice to.
If you're not nice to everyone,
then you're not nice, Darlene.
Then you're something else.
Aren't you?
-I'm sorry.
-[Emily scoffs]
Oh, I hope not. I hope that
you got exactly what you wanted.
Otherwise... [deeply inhales and sighs]
oh, it's gonna be all
this trouble over nothing.
-It, it, it's not trouble.
-[Emily] Well, it's gonna be.
I mean, lawyers, right? And...
movers, counselors.
-Ugh, you'll probably make me do counseling.
-No, no, no.
I don't think you should have to pay people
-to listen to your problems.
-[Pierre] No...
If you have to pay them, they're
probably not really listening
or you don't really have
problems. Maybe you don't have
real problems if no one
wants to hear about them.
-People love problems.
-We don't have a problem.
Who's "we" in this scenario?
You know,
in France, I could shoot you?
[rain splattering]
I mean, I could shoot you here, too.
There's lots of guns.
But in France, I could get away with it.
It's, it's, it's a law. It's
a crime of passion law.
You catch your wife, or husband,
in bed with someone, and you kill them,
that's okay with the
French, they understand.
I don't know if it extends to stuff
you witness at the dining room table,
but spirit of the thing, I
bet they'd let me slide.
You know, if you couldn't
help it. "I couldn't help it.
I... murdered them both."
[Pierre] Emily.
Although, that's foggy, right?
[deeply inhales] "I couldn't
help it. He kissed me." Right?
"I couldn't help it. I felt like
kissing her." Where does it end?
[Pierre] How about
right there, Emily? Right...
-Right there is good.
-Oh. The expert.
It... it's enough.
[scoffs] He's not even
French, you know that?
It's just a name. You're not really
from there. You don't know the law.
-[Pierre] I know it's not that.
-Well, it ought to be.
-[Pierre] Maybe. Maybe, preferable to this.
-Yes.
-Oh, you don't like this?
-[Pierre] A bullet through the h...
Oh, you, you don't like it? This part?
-[Pierre] Quick. Over.
-I wonder...
if there's any way this
could've been avoided.
I wonder, do you think
that there is anything
you could have done...
or not done, to see
this turned out differently?
[Pierre] I don't know.
I honestly don't know.
Hmm.
I believe you.
Um, okay. Can I get my jacket?
Sure. Are you cold?
-No. I'm leaving.
-[Thunder rumbling]
So soon?
-[Pierre] Emily.
[Rick] Come on.
-[Emily] Didn't you have a coat, Darlene?
-Uh, it's okay.
To have a coat?
[Darlene] I'll come back another time.
[scoffs] You think so?
It's... We're fine. We'll... we'll just...
Good night.
Night.
[sighs]
Chivalrous.
This is a real mess.
Who's gonna clean it up?
I'm not trying to be clever.
I really don't wanna do it.
We'll do it in the morning.
[car door closes outside] -I
don't wanna do it then either.
[car engine starts] -Can
we just leave it like this?
We have other rooms.
[Emily scoffs]
Do you want me not to want things?
Of course not. That's ridiculous.
Do you want me not to
have the things I want?
I want you to have the things I want.
I want you to want the things I want.
-I do.
-No.
-I do too.
-No.
You want to want the things I want.
I do. [Sighs]
I shouldn't have invited Rick. [Sighs]
I should have invited a fucking banker,
or a blonde.
Emily.
[soft click]
Jesus.
[soft click]
[gasps] Jesus!
[pants]
-Sorry.
[dramatic music]
That's for me?
Mm-hmm.
This is also for me.
Okay.
Is she...
She left. Yeah.
Then you can have some pie.
It's nice.
A little high.
-Not for a stool.
-[Chuckles softly]
Feel like you're going to interview me.
Or I have to sing a song.
It doesn't swivel.
Well, can't have everything.
That's true, huh? [Scoffs]
I can't.
-Why?
-I don't know.
Math?
Cake and eat it, too.
Pie.
Pie, all right.
What if I don't wanna eat it?
What if I just wanna have it?
[Rick] That's not everything.
[Emily] Mm.
And you wanna eat it.
This is fucking delicious.
No, but... Say I'm allergic,
or I just... I, I, I don't wanna
eat it. I'm not inclined.
My everything is just having the pie,
seeing it on the table,
spending quiet morning with it.
That's not everyone's everything.
Well, I'm not talking about
everyone having everything.
I'm talking about me. One person.
Why I can't have my everything?
Because... No, because...
everyone having everything
is part of having everything.
What?
[Rick] Everybody having everything
is part of having everything.
Oh! [Laughs]
-Oh, no.
-[Rick] It is.
Oh, no. Are you a communist?
It's just, you're not really happy
if the people around you aren't.
That's all.
I'm not.
I don't think so.
I don't know you that
well, but I don't think so.
When I was in high school, I always wanted
to stay at a party as late as possible.
-I always wanted to be the last one there.
-What a surprise.
[Rick] But my mom wanted
me home because she was...
If I was out, she was up,
and I would get, you know,
a lot of screaming, a
lot of slamming doors.
Uh, I think, one time,
I threw a phone book.
But, eventually, one or
the other of us wins. Yeah?
And if it's me, then I can
stay till whatever, 1:00 a.m.
I basically have a shit time because...
I have abandoned this poor woman,
my mother.
I've disappointed someone
who would never disappoint me.
And, uh, the same for her, I think.
And she'd just spent the whole
night making me, like, brownies,
or a hot turkey sandwich.
This wasn't a reward,
right? It was an apology.
We fought and fought to get
what we wanted. Both of us.
I mean, both of us felt
awful when we got it.
And that is, you know...
-Codependency.
[Rick] Yeah. [Chuckles]
Yeah.
And love.
You threw a phone book at your mother?
Not at her.
There was a lot of action in my house.
-It was pretty volatile.
-[Emily] Oh.
No one got killed or
anything. Just yelling, threats.
-It was good conditioning.
-[Emily chuckles] For what?
I don't know, dinner parties?
[softly chuckles]
[Rick] I was scared when I was little
because everyone was
getting divorced back then.
-Do you remember that?
-Everyone's still getting divorced.
[Rick] No, but it was very popular,
very trendy for a while there,
-back in the '80s?
-Okay.
I'd just run downstairs, "Stop fighting.
I don't want you to get divorced."
And one day, my mom, she...
she grabs me and she takes
my whole head in her hands
and she says, "Calm down. Calm down."
We're not really fighting with each other.
We're fighting next to each other,
"but we're really fighting with ourselves."
I found that very comforting.
Oh.
[Rick] They're true, at least.
Yeah.
Yes.
I feel like I've been fighting
with myself my whole life.
[Rick] You're pretty level. Imagine
how someone like Pierre feels.
No. I don't want to. I don't need to.
[deeply inhales] I know how he
feels. That's what I've been fighting.
[scoffs] I'm not so different from him.
You know? Or your, your...
-Mm-hmm.
[Emily] I have teeth, don't I?
I have that same spark for take and ruin.
I... it's, it's, it's, it's
instinct, it's animal instinct.
-Everyone's dogs. Everyone's...
-[Rick] Yeah.
But at least I'm fighting it.
At least I am trying to resist.
-[Rick] He's fighting it. Look at him.
-[scoffs] No.
You're fighting your instincts.
He's fighting, fighting his instincts.
[horn distantly blaring]
Who will win?
[softly chuckles]
The cannibals.
["I Remember" by Molly Drake]
We tramped the open
moorland in the rainy April weather
And came upon the little
inn that we had found together
The landlord gave us toast and tea
And stopped to share a joke
And I remember a firelight
I remember a firelight
I remember a firelight
And you remember smoke
We ran about the meadow grass
With all the harebells bending
And shaking in the summer wind
The summer never ending
We wander to the little stream
Among the river flats
And I remember willow trees
I remember willow trees
I remember willow trees
And you remember gnats
The autumn leaves are tumbling down
And winter's almost here
But through the spring and summertime
We laughed away the year
And now we can be grateful
For the gift of memory
For I remember having fun
Two happy hearts that beat as one
When I had thought that we were we
But we were you
And me