Don't Go Breaking My Heart (2021) Movie Script

And welcome back
to Good Day Portland.
I'm Bink Williams.
With me, as always,
my delightful co-host...
Misty McAllister.
And with us in our second hour,
Dr. Miranda Faraday,
founder of a new
breakup boot camp
that's taking Portland by storm.
Now, correct me
if I'm wrong, Miranda,
you're a psychologist?
A Ph.D., yes.
Right, and you provide
a six-week
health and wellness program
to heal the recently
broken-hearted?
Exactly.
When you typically
get out of a relationship,
you want one of two things,
to have the relationship
not be over,
or to be over the relationship,
and one of those things
we can't control,
but the other
is well within our power.
Well, it sounds like something
that could help someone
who maybe
can't get over lost love.
Well, sometimes,
people hide their true selves
until six months in,
when you witness her
scream at a waiter,
making him cry,
but tell us how this all works.
Each week has a theme.
"Release, Endurance, Teamwork,
Connection, Trust, and Closure",
and we do a coordinated
activity or exercise
in keeping with
the word of the week.
People may feel like
broken hearts last forever,
but I am here to tell them
that it doesn't.
Okay, folks,
we're going to go to Rick
for the weather,
and when we return,
Dr. Miranda Faraday
will tell us more
about her program.
Miranda?
He's going to need
your business card,
like, right now.
Yeah.
Well, everyone kept saying
how he's this young,
financial genius,
and they're crediting
my reporting
for taking down
what turned out to be
this massive Ponzi scheme.
The reason I didn't see you
for three weeks.
Jen, I'm doing this for us.
I'm working really hard
to prove myself,
and they're finally
starting to take notice.
That's great,
but I need you to take notice
of other things.
Like what?
It's been six months.
Where are we going?
Right now,
we're going to dinner.
Ben, we hardly see each other
these days.
I'm on track
to become an editor,
and then I get to be the one
handing out the assignments,
but in the meantime,
I kinda gotta write
what they tell me to write.
And I need someone
who is present.
I am.
I'm right here.
Look, let's not focus
on the time
that we don't spend together,
and instead
enjoy the time that we do.
That's not enough for me, Ben.
Something's got to give.
Are you asking me to choose
between you and my career?
I'm saying, the right answer
is, "You, Jen.
I choose you".
I do...
and I choose my career.
I'm sorry,
that's not enough for me.
Goodbye, Ben.
He went looking for my car
ages ago.
I have no idea where he is.
Think he took it for a joy ride?
That would be about right
for the night I'm having.
I swear, it has nothing to do
with the woman
who just got in a cab
with my heart
on the bottom of her shoe.
I think they charge
an extra cleaning fee for that.
Probably.
Well, I'm sorry to hear
that both your car
and your heart are MIA.
That's all right,
I didn't really like it
that much anyways.
Thinking about trading it in
for a newer model.
The car or the heart?
I need one of them to get home,
so I guess the heart
is of less use at the moment.
And the girlfriend?
Ex-girlfriend, actually,
but the bread was great,
so I guess that sort of
makes up a little
for getting dumped.
Do you want to talk about it?
You've heard the story
a thousand times.
Boy meets girl.
Girl gives boy
an unreasonable ultimatum.
Girl storms out.
Boy eats both entrees.
Yeah, we all have one of those.
Do tell.
Comfort me with your pain.
You've heard it a million times.
Girl meets boy,
girl marries boy.
Boy leaves girl,
girl takes up kickboxing,
pretends bag is boy.
I feel bad for the bag.
Not so much for the boy.
This is me.
Hey...
Broken hearts do heal.
I've seen it happen.
Thanks.
This letter is your chance
to say it all
to that person
who broke your heart.
It's only two minutes,
so don't hold back.
This is about you now,
and you are not the same person
who signed up for this program
a month and a half ago.
You have overcome obstacles,
you have stepped
outside of yourself.
You have changed in ways
you never thought possible.
Three, two, one...
pens down.
How are we feeling?
Mine has a lot of swears in it.
That's perfect.
Excellent.
So, as closure week
comes to a close,
you have to decide
at our bonfire,
do you send your letter,
or do you burn it?
That's all for today.
I'll see you tomorrow.
And remember the first rule,
no cyberstalking your ex.
You know I'm right.
Stay off Instagram.
Chloe, hi.
The phone has been ringing
off the hook
since the segment
on Good Day Portland.
And Bink Williams
signed up for the program,
so that's
our best publicity ever.
We are at capacity again,
so I had to add another session.
Good.
Maybe soon we can get
a dance studio or something,
so we don't have to share
the space.
I know.
It's all happening.
Are you ready
to lead a session yet?
You know why
this business works?
Because I know
how to stay in my lane.
I handle the business,
you handle the clients.
Well, it would be pretty easy
for you to just, like,
toss your blinker on
and change lanes.
You know this program
like the back of your hand.
And you are the heart
of the business,
and I am the head,
but I am sorting
through resumes,
and there are
some great candidates.
I'll set up interviews
this week.
You will not be on your own
forever, I promise,
and then, maybe
when the pressure is off,
you can take some time for you.
I take plenty of time
for myself.
I'm going to the rock wall
tonight for a climb.
That's not what I mean.
You need to stop moving,
and doing, and climbing,
and get back out there.
What would you say to a client
who refused to move on?
I'm not refusing to move on.
I will get back out there,
eventually.
I'm just...
You know, success
is happening for us right now,
and I want to ride that wave.
Thank you.
Hey, Kim.
Hi.
Mom and Dad okay?
Yeah, they're fine.
I just need you to talk me
out of doing something.
My greatest skill.
Darren's engaged.
I know it's been a year
since we broke up,
but it still stings.
What exactly
am I talking you out of?
Don't let me call him.
Okay.
Or email.
Yeah, no, don't do that.
Or ride my bike by his house.
I will literally
stand in the street
in front of your bike.
Look at us.
It's like we're some
sibling lonely hearts club.
Speak for yourself.
I'm fine.
You just think you're fine, Ben,
because that's what you do
after a breakup,
ever since Serena.
Why do you always
have to bring her up?
That was, like, 10 years ago.
Because it broke you,
and ever since,
you've just been putting
a Band-Aid over a bullet hole.
Have not.
I was almost
about to talk to Jen
about taking it
to the next level.
"Almost about to"?
Yeah, big step.
So, there is this program
that helps people
get over a breakup,
and I want you to come with me.
You remember the last one,
where they just yelled at you,
and told you
all the stuff you did wrong?
Or the walking on hot coals guy
that promised you
all this empowerment,
and the coals weren't even real?
Yeah, I'm still
paying that one off.
But at least I'm trying.
Unlike some people
who pretend that they're fine
and then probably cry
in their cereal every morning.
I don't even eat cereal.
Look...
I just don't want to see you
taken advantage of, okay?
Give me some credit.
I did my research.
She has a great reputation,
and it's in Campbell Park.
You love Campbell Park.
Come on, I'm tired
of feeling like this,
and I don't want to do it alone,
and remember?
Helping your sister?
Your greatest strength?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I hate it when my words
come back to haunt me.
Fine.
Thank you.
Look at her resume.
Advanced psychology degree,
was in private practice,
and she's a Reiki instructor.
I don't know what that means,
but it sounds like
teaching experience to me.
Sounds great,
but I mean, qualifications
aren't everything.
We need to find somebody
who gets what we do.
I have a good feeling about her.
And what I've learned
in my practice
is it's not one size fits all.
You can't treat everyone
out of a textbook.
I could not agree more.
I think that
too much talk therapy,
instead of real action,
can keep people stuck.
Exactly.
So, I was wondering...
how do you feel
about incorporating
past-life regression
into your program?
Well, that is...
not really what...
what we do.
But you should.
Because we aren't always
dealing with trauma
from this lifetime.
Okay, thanks, Gayle.
We will be in touch.
Thank you.
Namaste.
Hi.
Hi. I'm Helen.
It's my second go-round.
I guess it takes more
than six weeks
to get over a 30-year marriage.
Oh, my goodness, Bink Williams!
I watch you every morning.
I guess no one's immune
from heartbreak.
I guess not.
I'm just gonna...
I'm Kim. Hi.
Hi.
I'm here for moral support.
Yes, my brother
is completely unaffected
by his recent breakup,
or any other breakups
that may have happened
in the past.
At least, that's the story
we're going with.
Well, that's because
it's the truth.
- Ben.
- Hi.
We all go at our own pace.
It takes as long as it takes.
No pressure.
Well, we'll remember that.
It's work.
I'm gonna take this outside.
You're gonna want a muffin.
Yeah, I'll see you
in the morning, Leo.
Yeah, bye.
You.
Of all the boot camps
in all the world, right?
Do you know of many others?
Only the military kind.
What are you doing?
Just trying to picture you
with a buzz cut.
And how's that?
I think you picked
the right boot camp.
Well, you don't sound
too thrilled about it.
Well, my sister
wanted to go to this one.
I'm here for moral support.
That, and she knows
all my secrets.
I mean, it's got
a pretty good reputation,
and you can't beat
the view, so...
Well... yeah,
but Miranda's Breakup Boot Camp?
Come on,
I cannot be the only one
that thinks this is
a little out there.
I mean, maybe this lady thinks
she can start some new fad,
make a couple bucks,
I've seen it before.
Everybody likes a quick fix.
You have some pretty
strong feelings about it.
Pretty strong feelings
about a lot of things.
Like pizza.
Want to go grab a slice?
Maybe you shouldn't
knock it before you try it.
I don't know, the whole
kumbaya, circle time,
chanting with strangers
isn't really my thing.
Yeah, no, that's not
my thing at all either, so.
Excellent.
Then we're in agreement.
So, pizza?
Let's just go in,
and just... just give it a try.
You're not going to save me
from this, are you?
Is that what you're saying?
I think only you
can save yourself.
Come on.
Okay, everybody,
give Bink a little space.
And the first thing
that you're gonna learn here
is that we don't date
on the rebound,
yours or anyone else's.
So...
Thank you.
So you're the teacher.
The... breakup boot camper.
Miranda Faraday.
Ready for a little kumbaya,
circle time?
...And by the time
we reach week three,
"Teamwork",
you are going to feel like
completely different people,
and that'll bring us
right into to week four,
"Connection".
Can I chime in really fast?
I'm sorry, is that a thing
we're allowed to do here?
Yes, this is an open dialogue.
What about fear?
What about fear?
Well, I don't see it
on your list.
You have all these buzzwords,
"Trust, Release, Endurance",
but when do we deal with fear?
Because that's why
we're all here, right?
We're afraid to deal with life,
without that person
that just broke our hearts.
Ben...
He's right.
I'm scared to be on my own,
and I can't just move on
since I have to see Bethany
and her new girlfriend,
every other week,
because of Ruth.
We share custody.
It's so hard on the kids,
going back and forth.
Thankfully, mine are grown now.
Ruth is a cat,
but she's definitely struggling.
See, fear is a powerful
motivator for people.
Fear is a symptom.
Trust, endurance,
those are solutions,
and here in my boot camp,
we choose to focus
on the buzzwords that uplift.
Yeah, perhaps the person
with the Ph.D.
can continue
with the orientation.
Unless, of course,
you have a post graduate degree
as well?
No, no, just asking questions.
She said it was allowed.
It's okay.
We're all just
breaking the ice here,
but I do think
that you should do one thing
every day that scares you,
but I call that empowerment.
What are you afraid of?
Heights.
Spiders.
Dentist...
but I'm not going
to the dentist every day.
No, no, no one
is asking you to do that,
but when you face those fears,
the heights, the spiders,
the dentist,
you feel like
you can overcome anything,
including a broken heart,
and that is empowerment.
Because it's easy
to just be negative and cynical
and want to tear things down.
So, this program,
we're gonna focus
on the positive,
and you will see
exactly what I mean
in our kickstart session,
on Thursday,
called "Release".
Ben...
I'll wait for you outside.
Apologize.
You didn't tell me who you were.
You didn't ask.
I just wanted to say
that I know it might be weird
because you were so vulnerable
with me the other night,
but there's no shame
in having your heart broken.
My heart's not broken,
it's gently bruised.
Bruises heal faster than breaks.
Maybe there's
an underlying injury
you don't know about?
Come on, I was there.
I saw you.
It's not as bad
as you're making it out to be.
I'm doing great now.
I'm processing things.
Moving on.
In four days?
Sometimes, four days
is all you need.
Okay.
I think there's
something you want to say,
and I think it has to do
with the fact
that you're famished,
and you really want
to take me up
on that pizza offer right now.
Yeah, that's not
what I was going to say.
I do wonder
if this program
is the right fit for you?
Are you booting me out
of boot camp?
No, I wouldn't do that,
because I can help you,
but it only works
if you take it seriously,
so I think that is something
that you need to figure out.
You just can't help yourself.
You always
have to say something.
Editor of the Harvard Crimson.
You went to an Ivy,
and became a know-it-all.
Oh, stop.
I was a know-it-all
way before Harvard.
You know what, I'm fine.
I can do this on my own.
I mean, it's obvious
you're never going to deal
with your stuff.
Or is it
that I've already
dealt with my stuff,
and this is redundant?
You don't have to come back
on Thursday.
Well, you can't say
we didn't try.
Sure I can.
You've reached
Miranda's Breakup Boot Camp.
Please leave your name
and number,
and someone will get back to you
as soon as possible.
Thanks.
Miranda, hey, Ben Myers here.
Listen, I was thinking
about what you said,
and I think that the program
is not for me,
but I did want to say thank you,
and good luck,
and if you change your mind
about that pizza...
Yeah. Bye.
You got a minute?
I have some news.
Yeah, yeah, sure.
Dean Rossi got a job in Austin.
He's leaving
at the end of the month.
So there's an opening
for a features editor?
The board doesn't know
if you're ready,
but I'm working on them.
You just keep doing
what you're doing.
Whatever it takes.
I appreciate the vote
of confidence, Leo, really.
Miranda's Breakup Boot Camp.
I saw this lady
on Good Day Portland.
- Are you doing this?
- Well, no.
I went once,
but just to help my sister,
I'm not gonna go back.
She's always into
that self-help, fad stuff.
No, Ben...
You need to go back.
I don't need this, Leo.
I'm fine.
No, I mean, on assignment.
You know more than anyone
that once you start digging
beneath the surface,
sometimes, you strike oil,
like with that Ponzi thing.
Well, I don't know that
this is like the Ponzi thing.
Well, maybe not,
but is this the real deal,
or is it just some fad,
full of empty promises?
These people are everywhere.
Nobody is better than you
at finding the story
beneath the story.
Go back, dig around,
and bring me something good,
and if it turns out as well
as the last piece,
well, that editor job
is as good as yours.
Hey.
Ben isn't gonna be coming back,
so I'll use the extra bag
for demonstration.
- Can I talk to you for a sec?
- Yeah, what's up?
There's a voicemail
you need to listen to.
Hi, it's Dex.
You're probably surprised
to hear from me,
but I,
noticed you liked
one of my photos online,
which was kind of strange,
and I think we should talk.
So can you call me?
Thanks.
You liked one of
your ex-husband's photos?
No!
Not on purpose.
You were cyberstalking him?
I was curious,
I...
kind of like when you're
watching the nature channel,
and you see, like,
a snake eating a frog,
and you just... keep watching.
That is such a weird analogy,
and I don't know
what is going on with you,
but that is exactly what
we tell our clients not to do.
Dex does not deserve
any more of your attention.
I know.
It was one time, Chloe.
Are you gonna call him?
No.
He clearly thinks
that I'm pining over him,
and if I call him back,
it's just gonna confirm that,
so no, I'm not calling him back.
Tell me that you are not.
Not what?
Pining over him.
No!
I am totally, definitely,
categorically
not pining over him.
I don't need to call him back
to prove that.
So, yeah, no,
I'm not calling him back.
And you are deleting
that app off your phone.
I mean, I'm the first one
there in the morning,
I'm the last to leave at night,
I do every assignment
that they give me,
and he still has to sell me
to the board.
You've only been
at the magazine for two years.
These things take time.
But I'm so ready.
I'll do whatever it takes
to prove I'm up to the task.
You'll get there.
Just keep doing
what you're doing.
Yeah.
- Jen.
- Ben.
Hey.
It's not what it looks like.
We just... went to lunch.
Right.
You remember Emmett
from my office?
Yeah. Sure.
No hard feelings, right, bro?
No.
We gotta go to work.
Yeah, us too.
So at least that wasn't awkward.
Well, he seems
perfectly terrible.
I've met him.
He is.
You okay?
I didn't realize
I was that replaceable.
Hey...
this says way more about her
than it does you.
Don't self-help me.
Come on, you sound like
the boot camp instructor.
I'll take that as a compliment.
She's very smart.
Lots of five-star reviews.
Come on, we can
get over this together.
Me and you,
and you and me.
Us. Team.
Power healing.
Fine. I'll go back with you,
but only because I want
to take care of you, all right?
I want to make sure
you don't get sucked in.
Yeah, I don't think
that's the only reason.
Thank you.
Miranda?
Hi, refund.
I'll have Chloe cut you a check.
No, actually...
I've been thinking about it,
and I'm ready to do the work.
That's a pretty big change
from before
when you called it a fad,
and said that I was trying
to con vulnerable people
out of their hard-earned money.
I didn't say that
about you specifically...
- It was implied.
- But not intended.
So, what changed?
I'm a man who knows his flaws.
Do go on.
Okay, I ran into
my ex-girlfriend,
already on a date.
That sucks.
I'm sorry to hear that.
Sounds like a textbook rebound.
Yeah.
The guy called me, "Bro", too.
Yikes.
Extra sorry.
Okay, well, are you ready
to check your inner cynic
at the door?
Because tonight
we sign the pledge.
Of allegiance?
Because if not,
that sounds a little culty,
you know that, right?
What am I signing exactly?
It's a pledge of commitment,
and it's not to me,
it's to you.
If you think you can commit.
I can commit.
I've had the same ficus
for 10 years,
but I never sign anything
until I see the fine print.
Listen, Ben, I want you to know
that I am committed
to helping you
get over your breakup.
And I'm committed
to helping you get over yours.
That's not
how this is gonna work.
But is it, though?
Okay, how about
we just lose
all preconceived notions
we have about one another,
and we start fresh.
Deal?
Deal.
Good.
Kick!
Welcome to week one, "Release".
Punch!
Kick! Come on!
Atta way.
You have anger.
You have pain, you have fear.
Accept those emotions,
and then release them
into that bag.
Just like that.
Kim, do not go easy on that bag.
Did what's-his-name
go easy on your heart?
Darren?
No, he did not.
Atta girl.
Let it out, let it out!
What is going on over here?
I just, I don't see
what good this is doing.
I'm a lover, not a fighter.
Less talking, more punching.
Oh, come on, Ben,
a nine-year-old could take you.
Do better.
You're holding on too tight.
I don't want to pretend
the bag is Jen.
Or someone else from your past?
Okay, then,
why don't you just
give it a hit... bro?
Yes! Better.
Thank you, Ben, for joining us.
Kick!
Sorry.
You're okay.
Let's walk it off.
So, Bink Williams hates me.
I never thought I'd say that.
This does feel good,
though, right?
Yeah, I guess.
- Have a good night.
- See ya.
- Yo, hey.
- How was it?
It was about what you'd expect,
but I got a good workout,
which is a win
since you keep me so busy,
I had to cancel the gym.
So what's the deal?
I don't know yet,
still sussing it out,
but there was
one red flag, though.
This commitment thing
she wants us to sign.
Well, make sure
you read the fine print.
I intend to.
Okay, keep digging, Ben.
Yeah.
Hey...
Hey.
I just wanted to say
that was really good in there.
I'm just really feeling it.
See, once you stop resisting,
it's not so bad.
Yeah...
and starting with Release Week
was super intense.
Anybody ever ask
for their money back
after this point?
I was checking out your terms,
and you're pretty tough
on refunds.
Well, I'm only tough on them
because...
Miranda.
Dex.
You...
you didn't call me back,
and I think we should talk.
Yeah, we totally should,
but tonight is not good for me.
I...
We have a thing.
Right,
and we're late for that thing.
Yeah.
Reservations.
Our favorite restaurant.
Sushi restaurant.
Chef Koji
keeps the hand rolls coming.
They are... good.
And then after,
we go to the overlook,
and drink some wine,
and look out over the city,
and plot out our lives.
Yup, that's us.
Every Thursday night.
Super fun.
You bet.
Right...
Okay...
So, you'll call me
to set up a time?
Yeah, totally...
Bye.
You want to talk about it?
No.
Invisible
teacher-client line, huh?
But I am kind of involved now,
if you did
want to talk about it.
I promise
I wouldn't tell anybody.
That was my ex-husband.
I sort of assumed.
Well, you know what they say
about people who assume...
They're very charming.
So, are you going to call him?
No.
Look, I know
we don't get to closure
until, like, week six,
but maybe
that's why he was here?
I don't need closure.
Oh, come on, you tell
everybody in your classes
to do these things,
but you don't
believe it yourself?
No, that's not what...
Look, he doesn't get
to just leave
without saying a word,
and show back up out of...
What were you talking about,
because that stuff
was very specific.
I was just...
mentioning my favorite place.
I know what you're doing.
What am I doing?
Well, you're turning it
back around on me,
when the moment
was most definitely about you.
Yeah, but you made it about you
when you started getting
super descriptive.
It was hypothetical.
Was it, though?
Yeah.
Yeah, it was...
I would be happy to do that
in real life sometime,
if you're game.
I have to go prep a class
that starts tomorrow,
but thank you very much
for your help,
Ben.
Tough love, but then
I leave out the love part,
because you can't go too easy
on your clients,
or they never learn.
What we're looking for
in our new instructor, Simon,
is someone
who can approach things
from a place of kindness.
Kindness can be mistaken
for weakness,
and I'm not weak.
There's certainly
no question about that.
Well, they can't be all good.
What's that?
47 five-star reviews.
Well, you know people are able
to get those things removed
when they're
particularly scathing.
Yeah.
Miranda did say one thing
that was sort of cryptic
the other night.
Almost as if she doesn't believe
in the things that she's doing,
or follow them herself.
Sounds like something
worth looking into.
I have a meeting in the morning,
so do you mind covering
the feature department meeting
till I get there?
Yeah, for sure, I can do that.
It'll be good practice for you.
You know, for the future.
Welcome to week two.
Endurance.
I hated this week last time.
And squats.
I mean,
it's not like I wasn't warned...
by Misty,
my guy friends...
even my mom...
but she hates everyone,
so I can't really count her.
I get it, Bink.
My dog hated Darren.
That should've been
my first sign.
Dogs know, Kim.
Dogs know.
I should have, too.
I feel like such an idiot.
But there was this undeniable
connection, you know?
She got me in a way
that no one else ever has.
And you're good.
Somebody else will get you
like that again one day, Bink.
In relationships,
we see what we want to see.
This was a lesson
you needed to learn on your own,
and you did.
Okay, jumping jacks, people!
This is endurance!
Come on, come on, come on!
Like a boss, Kim!
Good job!
I don't understand
how this is supposed
to help somebody
get over a breakup.
Challenging yourself
at a point where your confidence
may be depleted
can make you feel powerful.
So I went bungee jumping
this weekend.
I wanted to face my fear,
and it was terrifying...
but in a good way.
She used one of the bad words.
Never mind him.
Go on, Helen.
Well, it was either that,
or call Roger,
so I opted for diving
head first toward the concrete
and praying that the ropes hold.
Well, I'm glad you chose
the safe option.
I wanted to feel alive,
which I really actually
haven't felt since my divorce.
And now
everything looks different.
I feel different.
You're really inspiring, Helen.
I am?
Maybe I'm not so wrong.
You should add a fear week.
Maybe I should,
but I would call it
transcendence.
Good job!
Remember, in this life,
you are not alone.
You have a support system.
We'll get more into it during
the Trust and Teamwork week,
but lean on each other, here.
Your turn.
Get across that beam.
You're so pushy.
Please.
Look at that course.
All of you made it.
Not a single one of you quit.
Next time your confidence
takes a hit,
I want you to remember that,
and I want you to relish it.
Well done.
Helen, how are you feeling?
Oh, yeah.
Looks like I need to find myself
an end-of-the-week ritual, too.
And my sister's yoga teacher
is selling her studio
when she moves
at the end of the summer.
It could be the place.
I mean, if new sign-ups
continue like this,
it's a definite possibility.
So this candidate
has two degrees.
Early childhood education
from NYU
and psychology
from Carnegie Mellon.
Sounds good,
but I know somebody
with an MBA from Columbia
who would be perfect.
This is our business, Miranda.
It's too risky.
Chloe, you've been with me
every step of the way,
since Dex left.
You know this program
better than me, probably.
I just don't have your...
vitality.
Please, between the two of us,
you are the most...
vitalitous.
That is not a word.
It could be, in Canada.
There she is.
You?
Me? You?
You climb here?
I climb here.
Like, all the time.
Funny, I've never seen you.
I was thinking about
the obstacle course.
It was empowering.
Didn't want to lose
the momentum.
Good.
Want to race to the top?
I'm more of a slow and steady
kind of climber.
I'm more of
a challenge yourself,
beat your best time
kinda climber.
Kind of figured.
Always on the move, right?
Classes by day,
climbing walls by night?
It's how I manage my stress,
I guess.
That's fine,
as long as it's not
an avoidance tactic.
I manage mine by sitting still.
You know, your class is a lot
more expensive than you think.
I've had to go
to the chiropractor three times
since I started... my back.
My class is very affordable.
And I'm sorry about your back.
What about your heart?
Strong and sturdy.
Okay. Not ready
to talk about your stuff yet.
That's fine.
We'll work on it.
I don't have stuff.
I'm getting there.
You done already?
Okay.
You want to switch walls?
Yeah, sure.
Can I get some water first?
Sure.
So boot camp?
Where did that come from?
Necessity
is the mother of invention.
Necessity for you?
You're a Ph.D.
You had to be making
a nice living.
It's never
about the money for me.
It says on your website
that you have 417 healed hearts
under your belt.
How many unhealed?
You know, looking for problems
where none exist
is a very unhealthy outlook.
Or focusing on the negative
from time to time
is how we improve.
Grow.
Which I understand
is sort of your thing.
See, I pay attention in class.
Well, sometimes.
But not in my boot camp.
Look, this is how I healed
after a broken heart,
so now it's how I help others.
So the business
was your rebound?
What, is this a workout
or an interrogation?
I'm placing my trust in you,
and I just...
I kind of want to understand
what I should.
Because it works.
You'll see.
Okay.
As long as you're not diving
into other people's problems
so you don't have to deal
with your own.
Is that what you think,
Dr. Freud?
Go. You can have
a head start this time
so it's not
so embarrassing for you.
Right. Here we go again.
Time's up.
Okay...
That's...
as far as I go.
- You're doing great.
- I know.
I'm on to you, you know.
You can tell me the truth.
This was your first time,
wasn't it?
You got me.
As you can see,
I'm not so good
at being not so good at things.
That's why you need
to challenge yourself,
so that you're not
in your head so much.
Well, I'm a chronic
over-thinker.
It's hard for me
to just turn it off.
There he is.
I was waiting for that guy
to get here.
What guy?
Valet stand Ben.
The one who thought
he was never
going to see me again,
so he was completely real.
Well, I feel the same way
about valet stand Miranda.
She just listened.
She didn't try
to analyze or fix me.
But that's exactly
what you're paying
Boot Camp Miranda to do, so.
Not tonight.
Tonight, we're just
a couple of climbers.
One very accomplished climber.
One who's just happy
he didn't break any bones.
The night I met you...
I think Serena did me a favor.
Did she?
Yeah.
I was always talking about
"maybe almost" taking things
to the next level.
Jen's problem with me.
I could never get past
"maybe almost".
What? Why are you
smirking at me?
It's not a smirk.
This is exactly
where you should be
at this point of the program.
The letting-go stage.
That means it's working.
Well, everyone,
welcome to week three.
Teamwork.
After a breakup,
we can feel like
our trust is shattered
and that we're alone,
but we're not.
We can rely on other people
to help us through anything.
So, today,
we are going to work together...
or we are all going to die!
There is a bomb in this room
that is big enough
to destroy the entire city,
and we have 60 minutes
to dismantle it.
Start the clock!
The fate of the people
rests in our collective hands.
Do not let them down.
Start.
Seriously, come on.
There's a bomb!
Okay... One, two...
five.
- Come on.
- Four...
I'm trying to get this right.
It's not right!
Don't yell at your partner.
Lean on them.
Don't make me do math!
Okay, switch places.
- Okay.
- Okay.
In relationships,
just as in life,
if something's not working,
we try a different tactic.
Ben, how you doing?
Pretty good, actually.
You want to...
you want to press
the big red button?
Just don't blow up the city.
Cool.
Secret passage.
There's no door knob.
- Yikes.
- Yeah.
There's no door knob.
Your teammates have encroached
on enemy territory
and have been captured.
You must rescue them
in order to receive
your next clue.
Hang in there, Miranda,
we'll save you!
And my brother.
Yeah. Sure, whatever.
Tell my mother I love her.
I'm not a big fan
of small spaces.
I have never been a big fan
of small spaces.
Can...
Okay...
Hey, hey, are you okay?
Yeah.
I'm-I'm totally not panicking.
Except for the part
where I'm kind of
a little bit panicking.
Can you just ask me a question
or distract me
or something, please?
Yeah. Yeah.
Favorite ice cream?
Vanilla.
Come on, that's so boring.
What's yours?
Chocolate chip cookie dough.
Way too complicated.
I'm a purist.
We're working on it, you guys!
Making real good progress here.
No, we're not!
I know sitting still is not
your favorite activity.
It's actually right above
being trapped in small spaces,
so I'm really killing it here.
Oh, good.
Can you not tell anyone
out there about this, please?
Because I do need to maintain
some sort of
street cred with them.
I'm not so great
at letting my guard down.
See, but by telling me that,
that's exactly
what you're doing.
Very astute.
Maybe you should be
teaching this class.
I'm just trying
to return the favor.
You take care of everybody else.
You know...
you could let
your guard down, too.
See, that's one of
my least favorite activities...
right up there with...
failing at pretty much anything,
and getting attacked by a shark.
Well, the shark thing's normal.
And you don't really strike me
as the type who fails at much.
See, that's the thing,
I work really hard
to not fail at much.
In my business life, at least.
And in your relationships?
Suppose I could've
paid those equal attention.
Yeah...
same.
Everyone's dead.
Great!
Well, you can't win 'em all,
but we worked together,
we enjoyed the journey,
and that is the lesson.
So... smile.
Great. Thank you.
Get home safe.
I'll see you all next week.
Hey...
I had a question.
Shoot.
About the letter,
at the end,
where we burn it
or send it or whatever.
Are there rules there,
or can we change who it's for?
I mean, you're getting
a little ahead of yourself,
that's week six,
but you'll be writing it
to the person you need
to let go of the most.
Yeah.
That's kind of what I thought.
Serena?
Kim tell you that?
You told me that.
At Rock Wall.
Freudian slip, maybe,
when you said Serena,
instead of Jen.
You're a really good listener.
That's... that's really annoying.
It's kind of the job.
Why the change?
You know...
because I was always just
toeing the line with Jen,
couldn't figure out
why I couldn't really commit.
Maybe because
you never really let go
of your one?
I'll see you next week.
Welcome to week four...
Connection.
This week is all about
getting back in touch
with our vulnerability.
And this here is a safe space
where you can feel that.
This was my favorite week
last go-around,
and I have to say,
I was pretty darn good at it.
This is Senora Cornejo.
She is a world champion
on the salsa circuit.
She's going to teach us
some moves today.
We are one short today
because Jess is out,
so, Bink,
I will be your partner.
Salsa is not only
a dance of love.
It's a dance of feeling.
So I want you
to be in your body,
and don't worry
about how you look,
just feel the music
with all of your being.
We're going to be doing
a very simple dance I created
called "La Vida Del Amor",
"A Life of Love".
Is everybody ready?
I'm sorry.
This is weird.
I cannot be partnered
with my brother for this.
- Yeah.
- Let's switch.
I'll dance with you
and Ben can dance with Miranda.
Thank you.
Trust your partner.
Do not be afraid
to hold onto each other.
Dance is an unspoken language.
We say so much in silence
as we move, together,
to the music.
And step, two, three, four.
And back, two, three, four.
Twirl out,
twirl in...
- Sorry.
- Sorry.
- I'm sorry.
- That's okay.
And step, two, three, four.
And back, two, three, four.
Twirl out, twirl in, and dip.
Try that again.
Okay.
And step, two, three, four.
And back, two, three, four.
Twirl out,
twirl in,
and dip.
Remember...
remember what it's like
to feel safe
in the arms of another person.
You get to have that again.
We all do.
Ben. Hi.
Hey.
I know this is
sort of outside of your realm,
but I need your help
with something,
and I don't think I'm equipped
to handle it alone.
What's going on?
It's Kim.
She wrote
her week-six letter early,
went to drop it off
to Darren today,
to show him that
she's doing fine without him,
and it did not go well.
Oh, no.
Where is she?
I'm meeting her at my place
in 10 minutes.
Can I text you the address?
Yeah.
I'll be right there.
Weekend in Laguna?
Delete.
Epcot Center?
Never happened.
Mom and Dad's
40th wedding anniversary.
Hey, don't delete them.
We'll photoshop him out.
Make George Clooney your date.
We have a really good
art department at the magazine.
Okay, but can Chris Pine
be my date?
Done.
I'm so stupid.
I saw his fiance
and I burst into tears.
I didn't want to wait.
I wanted him to know right now.
That I'm doing just fine.
But we send those letters
or we burn them for us.
Not for them.
I really thought I was okay.
Yeah.
Sometimes, it's so much easier
just to be angry at someone
than it is to forgive them.
Why is that?
I guess because
when somebody's wronged us,
we don't want them
to get away with it.
I mean, how's that fair?
Why do they get to be happy?
That's exactly how I feel.
But all that does
is steal our joy,
while they're out there,
living their lives,
none the wiser.
So don't let him have
that much power over you.
Don't let him steal your joy.
You're right.
And I have
a potential new client to meet.
So, I am going to go home,
clean myself up,
and continue being
hugely successful in my career.
Way better.
Thank you.
That was
pretty great back there.
Thanks.
Empowerment can kind of be
a mirage at first.
It feels so good,
that you think your work's done,
but...
really, you're just
getting started.
It's a process.
Kind of like two steps forward,
10 steps back.
Well, how many steps
does it usually take?
Is this, like,
a "I need to buy
new running shoes" kind of thing
or a flip-flop level distance?
Everybody's different.
How many steps
did it take for you?
I will let you know
when I get there.
Bit of a work in progress?
Something like that.
We started with one class
and now we have five
that run simultaneously.
Miranda covers them all,
so you can see
why we need a new instructor,
especially now that
there's interest
in expanding outside Portland.
But Miranda will go over
the nuts and bolts with you
when she gets here.
And there's
our illustrious leader now.
Excuse me for a moment.
Hey.
Dex called again.
He won't stop calling.
He started talking to me
about how we were
all such good friends,
playing on my sympathies.
What did you say?
All I could say.
That I would relay
the message to you.
I don't think
he's going to let up.
What are you going to do?
I don't know.
Maybe you should hear him out.
Once you step out
of your comfort zone,
it becomes a lot easier.
And you say you're not ready
to run a class.
He's waiting.
You did a good job
with that staff meeting.
You're a natural born leader.
You think so?
I do.
They're coming around
upstairs, too.
I can be very convincing
when I want to be.
I appreciate that about you.
So how's the boot camp
piece coming?
Anything I can look at yet?
Still kind of
piecing it together,
compiling notes, research,
background, stuff like that.
Plus, there's still
a couple of weeks left
in the program.
I have to admit,
it's not at all what I thought
it was going to be like.
You're getting involved,
I can tell.
Are we going
to have to deprogram you?
Sometimes, the truth
can be ugly, you know?
It's not like that.
Listen, don't worry about
how far along it is.
Just get me your notes,
whatever they are,
just so I can get an idea
of how it will best fit
in the next issue.
And let's talk deadline
later today.
You think
you can get me some photos?
Yeah.
Nice.
In this day and age,
where millionaires are made
in the self-help aisle
of a Barnes & Noble,
one has to ask oneself,
can you get over a broken heart
in six short weeks?
Miranda's Breakup Boot Camp
in Portland, Oregon
seems to think you can.
So, should I call her in
for a second interview?
No.
You are not going
to let up, are you?
You've known me since I was 19.
Have I ever let up?
Looks like you have a visitor.
See you.
'Night, Ben.
'Night.
You.
Hey.
Sorry. I hope this isn't
a bad time.
I just needed to talk to you.
No, I was just heading
to Rock Wall.
You want a rematch?
Would you be up
for something different?
Maybe go to one of
my favorite places,
when I've got
to shake off the cobwebs?
I guess I could be up
for something different
this one time.
When I was just out of college,
I used to come up here,
look out at the city,
and think...
I'm going to make it here.
It's so beautiful.
It's too bad we blew it all up.
We'll save the city next time.
- I wanted...
- Look...
Can I say something?
Yeah, sure.
I'm sorry.
What do you have
to be sorry about?
I misjudged you.
I called you a cynic,
and I didn't give you
the benefit of the doubt
that I give everyone else
who takes my program.
But after the escape room
the other day...
You're a good guy, Ben.
Well...
You were sort of right about me.
Go on.
Serena.
Jen.
Every girlfriend in between.
It's like for the last 10 years,
I've kept everybody
at arm's length.
Avoiding.
Yeah...
you maybe...
were a little bit right
about me, too.
I'm sorry,
can you say that again?
I just want to make sure
I heard that right.
Don't ruin it.
Boot camp was my rebound.
After Dex left,
I threw myself into it,
and it worked.
So, I just...
I never really addressed
any underlying issues.
But your program has helped
so many people to let go.
And I speak from experience.
I'd never be here
if you hadn't dragged it
out of me.
So...
what's next?
Why don't we just stay here?
It's okay to just stop, Miranda.
You don't have to do
anything right now,
except be here.
With me.
Okay.
Welcome to week five.
Trust. Ben?
So, I was 24 years-old,
and I'm shaking, I'm so nervous.
And I take the ring box
out of my jacket,
and I get on one knee,
and I open the box,
she tells me to get up.
Says she can't marry me.
Which, I understand,
is sort of not how
these things are supposed to go.
Anyways,
within three days,
she's packed up,
moving to Chicago,
with Dave Friedman,
her first love.
Totally derailed my life.
It was bad.
I'd never seen him
like that before.
Or since.
Well, the past isn't prologue.
You can put your trust
in the next person,
that they won't let you fall.
You ready?
Okay. Three.
Two.
One.
Go.
Hi, Dex.
Yeah, sorry.
I've been busy.
What time?
Yeah.
I'll meet you there.
I'm glad you agreed to meet.
I was starting to think
you weren't going to.
To be honest, I wasn't,
but I think it's finally time
for you and I to talk.
I agree.
And I...
I didn't want you to hear
this news from anyone else.
I'm getting married.
In June.
I'm sorry if that's hard
for you to hear.
Actually, I'm...
I'm happy for you.
Really?
You have no idea
how much I appreciate you
saying that.
Yeah. I...
You know, I was so mad
for so long.
I mean, you left
without saying anything,
but I was dreading this moment,
and now I don't...
I don't understand why.
I mean, I know
why I was dreading it.
But this...
This is not the reaction
I thought I was going to get.
You're not mad?
I wasn't expecting it either,
but no, I'm not mad at all.
I just see very clearly now
that you and I
were not right for each other.
I'm...
I'm kind of speechless.
Yeah, it's crazy.
I talk about it all the time,
that we...
we create these scenarios
in our head,
we build this whole world
around it,
and...
it doesn't...
You know, I just...
I feel lighter.
Yeah.
Me too.
Congratulations.
Hi.
Hey, hi.
Sorry, they said
I could just come back here.
Yeah. Yeah, please.
Come in.
So, what's up?
Let me guess.
You haven't seen me in 48 hours,
you kind of missed me?
Smooth.
You don't have to
say it out loud.
I can tell these things.
Can you?
Interesting, because what
I was actually going to say
was that I wanted to thank you
for your friendship
the other night.
My friendship?
I'm friend zoned.
You are my client,
and you just got out
of a relationship.
How's that article coming?
Hey. Hi.
It's...
coming along.
I'm working on it right now.
I know you.
Sorry?
I'm sorry.
I thought you were someone else.
My mistake.
I need a first draft
by tomorrow for the print copy.
And we'll send
the online version
to the web team later?
Yup.
- I'm working on away.
- Good deal.
You want to get out of here?
Grab a bite?
I only have an hour
before my next class,
but if it's a quick,
friendly bite, sure.
Excellent.
I know just the place.
Okay.
Street meat?
What's wrong with street meat?
This guy's an institution.
He's been on this corner
for decades.
No, nothing.
It's just not
what I was expecting.
Come on, don't be a snob.
I'm not being a snob.
You said you had an hour.
I had to do the best I could
with what I had.
Beef with mustard, please.
The usual for me.
Thank you.
So...
don't knock it till you try it.
You're one to talk.
Okay, I'll admit,
I was off to a rocky start,
but you can't say
that I'm not embracing it.
This is so good.
Right?
No, you have actually
been doing very well...
and so have I,
especially with Dex
this morning.
You saw Dex?
I did.
And I...
I closed the book.
I don't know why I wanted
to tell you that, but...
after the other night,
I just did.
This is progress.
I could tell you were
holding on to something.
Did you learn anything
in week one?
That was...
that was release week,
by the way.
Well, we go at our own pace,
and I just took
a few years longer
than everyone else, so.
I would maybe not put that
in the brochure.
So, later on,
do you want to go
sit in silence again?
See what else that drums up?
Sorry.
We just agreed to be friends.
Did we?
I said you are my client,
and how you're on the rebound,
and I'm kind of
on the rebound, so.
Yeah, this would be
a terrible idea.
I won't tell anybody
if you won't.
I got to go.
Oh, come on.
Friends?
Friends?
- Friends.
- Friends.
Ben! That was a close one.
Next time, let me know
when she's coming by the office.
I didn't know.
She just stopped by.
Well, anyways...
rest assured
that extra dedication
is not going unnoticed.
When I first started at Harvard,
I thought I wanted
to be pre-med.
- Really?
- Yeah.
Until they took us
to an operating suite,
and I took one look
at the surgery and I fainted.
- Stop.
- It gets worse.
There was a girl in this class
that I really wanted to impress,
and I fainted on her...
and I broke her tibia.
That's embarrassing.
Yeah, it is. It is.
So I shifted my focus
to journalism,
and I found my calling there
pretty quick.
- Happy accident.
- Yeah.
I liked that my words could...
educate and inspire...
protect.
Very happy accident.
Kind of like stumbling across
this crazy boot camp
and meeting this instructor
who just will not let you
avoid your stuff.
Well, sometimes,
that instructor
comes across a student,
who calls her out
on her stuff, too.
I love my job...
and I'm on track
for this promotion...
and I've been thinking
that I never really figured out
that whole
work/life balance thing.
Me either, really...
which is awful,
because I talk about it
in class all the time.
I was thinking about
something else
you said in class.
Maybe not all rebounds are bad?
Like...
maybe they lead you
away from the wrong thing,
so you can go towards
the right one?
Exactly.
I felt it that first night,
and I think you did, too.
Maybe rebounds show us
how we really feel.
And then...
he kissed me.
Like, he kissed me.
Well, you certainly had a day,
didn't you?
Yes, I did.
I am speechless!
And you know me,
I am never speechless.
But it was a mistake.
He's a client.
I just...
I got caught up in the moment.
That's a good thing.
That is a great thing.
I haven't seen you like this
in a long time.
I really like her.
You like him.
Why couldn't he have just stayed
a random stranger
outside of a restaurant?
Why did he have to join
my class?
Kim, I got
to tell you something.
You were right.
I really needed this class.
See!
You should take my advice
more often.
I'm very smart.
I know.
I crossed a line.
Whatever you decide,
at least you're finally
over Dex,
and I don't think
that would've happened,
if it weren't for Ben.
My job is to help my clients.
Not confuse them.
I can't make this about me.
I get that,
but you get to be
happy again, too.
Remember that?
There you are.
What's going on with you, Ben?
What are you talking about?
I just read your first draft.
It's all over the place.
There's no point of view.
You're straddling the line.
I don't understand
what this boot camp
is all about.
Where's the conviction?
Like, take a stand.
It's just a first draft.
Good.
Because I don't think
you even believe
what you're writing here.
This is not you.
I don't know what to say to him.
You're going to have to talk
to Ben sometime.
I'll see him in class tomorrow.
What are you waiting for?
Why don't you just
kick him out of class
and ask him out
on a date, already.
Or better yet, just wait.
The session's almost over.
Okay, say we do
give it a shot...
we'd be doing the exact thing
I tell my clients not to do.
What's that?
Transfer your feelings
from one person to the next.
Wait, you still
have feelings for Dex?
No, no,
but what if I'm just
a band-aid for Ben?
And what if a sinkhole opens up
and swallows the studio whole?
"What ifs" are pointless.
No. They are preparation.
For a sinkhole?
No. You know what I mean.
People change their minds
all the time.
Love is a risk,
and you're just going
to have to consider...
is Ben worth the risk?
You sound like someone.
What is it?
A teacher!
Man, I knew...
it just sounded so natural.
You're good at it.
No...
On how to handle love,
and breakups,
and the heart,
and all of those things.
You could get paid for it!
Hey, Miranda,
for the bonfire,
do we only burn our letters?
Because Darren left
this sweatshirt at my place,
and I'm sick of looking at it,
and I'm definitely
not going back there
to return it.
No, you can burn
whatever you like.
It's anything
to help you let go.
This ceremony is about you.
Thanks.
Good to know.
Miranda, I'd love
to have you back on the show.
I could talk about
my experience,
we could delve
a bit deeper than last time.
I know you're thinking about
expanding locally,
but you have the potential
to go national.
Books, merchandising...
Let's get you
some real exposure.
I would love that.
Thank you.
Ben...
Bink...
I think he's coming around.
Look, I really need
to talk to you about something.
After class?
Yeah.
Street meat for dinner?
It's on me.
Sounds good.
I'll meet you there.
Welcome to week six.
Closure.
You are not the same person
who signed up for this class
a month and a half ago.
You have grown.
You have changed.
You have overcome obstacles.
This letter
is your chance to say it all
to the person
who broke your heart...
the person who put you here.
It's only two minutes,
so don't hold back.
This is about you now.
Three, two, one...
pens down.
How are we feeling?
This letter is way better
than the last one.
Good.
And tomorrow night
at the bonfire,
you will make the decision...
do you send it...
or do you burn it?
I'm heading home.
Here's some stuff
they left at the studio.
I don't know whose this is.
That's Ben's.
I'll give it to him later.
Cool.
See you tomorrow.
Bye.
"Fad or phenomenon?"
There you are.
I got you a chili dog.
You left these at the studio.
- I can explain.
- Can you?
Because you've had
plenty of opportunities
and you never mentioned
any article.
Look, I...
It's not like I wasn't willing
to do press, Ben.
You could've just asked me
for an interview.
Miranda...
This whole thing
has been a lie.
Was there even a Jen?
Or a Serena?
Was Kim in on this?
No. Kim didn't know
anything about this.
Look, I didn't even know
I was writing it
when I joined the group.
But you saw an opportunity
to bring me down
and you seized it.
No. Miranda,
everything that I've told you
from the beginning
has been the truth.
Except for the part
about writing
an expose on my business.
It's not what you think.
What I think
is that maybe journalism
wasn't your calling.
You should've been an actor,
because that was
a killer performance.
You've really done it
this time, haven't you?
Come on.
Let's open this.
Hey.
You okay?
I'm fine.
No, you're not fine.
And that's okay, Miranda.
Why don't you go home,
take the rest of the day off?
I can't.
It's kickstart day
for this class.
We're partners.
I've got this.
Plus, if we're going
to buy that yoga studio,
I should really
work on my teaching skills.
Are you sure?
I'm sure.
Go home.
Clear your head.
See you at the bonfire tonight.
Okay.
Look, I know things with Ben
didn't go the way you wanted,
but it was a big step.
You inspire everyone
to be better.
To believe in their own power.
And that's what I'm going to do.
We are going to expand
this business together.
Yeah, we are.
We're going to need,
like, 10 more instructors,
but I'll do for now.
I'll see you
at the bonfire tonight.
Thank you.
Hey, Miranda,
can I talk to you for a second?
Sure.
I swear I didn't know
about the article,
and I'm furious with him.
I know you didn't, Kim,
and I don't hold any of it
against you.
Thank you.
But I will say this, Miranda...
I know he joined the group
for the wrong reason,
and he can be combative
and annoying,
but you really did change him.
I don't know about that.
Hey...
...he's a different person,
and it's 100% because of you.
I would love
to believe that, but...
We should go join the group.
And while we had
three good years together
and two not so good years,
I set you free.
And I set myself free.
So, that's everyone.
Actually, there is one more.
Sometimes, the teacher
learns a thing or two.
I'm not going
to read it out loud,
but I will say to this person,
thank you for your lessons...
and I release you.
Now...
it's time for the big decision.
Do you burn your letters...
And this.
Right.
Or do we send them?
Kim?
I gave Darren
his letter in person,
but this will do.
Bethany,
I wish all the best for you
and your new girlfriend.
And I am comforted by the fact
that Ruth will always love me
more than her.
The first time around,
I burned my letter.
But this time...
I'm sending it.
Roger is getting
a piece of my mind.
Thatta girl.
Bink?
One second.
I thought he brought that
so he'd have
something to sit on.
Celebrities, you know?
This...
this was
Catherine's favorite chair
at my house.
I can't look at it
without seeing her mean face.
Good riddance, Catherine.
And stop shouting at waiters.
Someone else will get me.
Burning the midnight oil,
are we?
Yeah.
You asked for conviction.
That's what
I'm going to give you.
Great.
It'll be on your desk
in the morning.
Can't wait to read it.
I've seen army cadets
do this course
and you are blowing them
out of the water.
Now keep going!
Three weeks in
and your class loves you
more than any of my classes
have loved me.
Margaret is turning a color
I've never seen before.
Yeah, maybe give her a break
before the next one,
but keep with
the inspiring words to the rest.
Look what you are accomplishing.
After this, a broken heart
will feel like a hangnail.
Nine missed calls.
Yeah, I've got five.
It's the office.
I hope everything's okay.
I'll call them.
Hi, it's Chloe.
What's going on?
No, I don't know
anything about it.
We didn't give any interview.
Is it online?
No? Okay.
We'll pick one up.
Ben's article.
Yeah.
We live in a cynical world.
It's easy to assume
that everyone has
ulterior motives
because negativity sells.
Bad news takes the superhighway
and good news
rides the pony express.
So, when I joined
Miranda's Breakup Boot Camp,
little did I know
that, in six short weeks,
I would be
a completely different man.
Each carefully-crafted step
of boot camp
brought me back
to the man I used to be
before I had my heart broken
by the woman
I once thought I'd marry.
The man, who once believed
in possibility.
In goodness.
In love.
As this article
walks you through
the steps I took
to find my way back to myself,
I invite the reader
to give this program a shot.
Or two.
...because healing
is yours for the taking.
And Dr. Miranda Faraday
has found the step-by-step guide
to get you there.
You want me
to hold down the fort?
Yes, please.
That's good.
Looks good to me.
Back again?
Do you know
where I can find Ben?
Upstairs.
Executive floor.
With the other editors.
He got the promotion?
He did right by you,
threatened to quit
if I didn't print his article
word for word.
But good or bad,
all I ask for is the truth.
Negativity sells a bit better.
Gets more clicks, but...
I think this is going to be
pretty good for you.
8th floor.
Corner office.
Lots of windows.
Thank you.
They'll give the corner office
to anyone these days.
I liked your article.
I'm glad.
Sort of wrote it
for an audience of one.
Yeah, well, my phone
has been ringing off the hook.
Now I'm in a real situation
because of you.
Sorry about that.
In my defense,
not the worst problem to have.
It's not so bad.
I really am sorry, Miranda.
About everything.
I know.
And if there were only a way
for you to make it up to me.
My article wasn't enough?
It was
a very good starting point,
but I was thinking
something more along the lines
of, you know, maybe...
being my rebound?
I was in the market
for one of those
and then I met
this really smart doctor,
and she said
those were terrible.
She's a work in progress.
Aren't we all?
And, aside from helping me
to get over
she who shall remain nameless,
your program helped you
to find love again, as well,
with Ben here,
who wrote what I have to say
was a fantastic article
in Advantage Monthly Magazine
about his own experience
at your boot camp.
She's very good
at what she does.
Thank you.
It was a job, but...
once you realize
that you can commit to the work,
I guess anything's possible.
You see, Misty.
The sooner one begins the work,
the sooner one can get over
the guy who pretended
to be a pilot
and catfished her
over the Internet.
I know, Bink,
and she will.
And coming this Fall,
Dr. Miranda Faraday's new book,
Miranda's Breakup Boot Camp,
will be available
in all good bookstores
and online retailers,
so be on the lookout for that.
Meanwhile, you can sign up
for her classes
at her brand-new studio
downtown.