Dylan Dog: Dead of Night (2010) Movie Script

Dad, dinner's almost ready!
Dad? Oh, my God! Dad?
Dad?
Dad?
New Orleans can be a
tough town to die in.
But when you die and come
back, you call me. Dylan Dog.
Or at least you did.
You see, I used to protect all of them,
all those creatures of the night.
Those sharp-toothed monsters you
thought were only in the movies.
Why? Because they're real.
Yeah, I know what you're thinking.
I used to think the same thing.
But go ahead.
Take a closer look at that
bum begging for change.
Take a look at your
neighbour your best friend.
Hell, maybe even your girlfriend.
The undead are out there,
hiding in plain sight.
And in my day, I was the
line between you and them.
I was the peace, the cork in
the bottle, the line in the sand.
But then everything changed.
And I discovered there's
more than one way to die.
Your heart can go on
ticking, but sometimes,
that's just for show.
But flesh-eating monsters
weren't my problem anymore.
I had moved on to a
much safer line of work.
You think you can just ruin
people's lives and get away with it?
You cocked the gun too early.
What?
Shove a gun in somebody's
face, that's shock enough.
You want to save the
gun-cooking till later.
In case the gun itself doesn't
put enough fear into the guy.
You've already done that.
Now what do you do?
Shake it at me?
See? Hardly effective, right?
But if you save the
gun-cooking until later, boom.
Then you've got escalation.
And that, my friend,
is the name of the game.
All right. So, why are you here?
I'm here to put a bullet in your head.
Not ringing bells.
You're gonna have to help
me with this one, Chief.
Who are you again?
Oh, right. You're the
one with the screamer.
Those pictures are
gonna cost me everything.
The four-bedroom,
five-bath house
with the pool and the tennis court,
and the Mercedes S-Class!
It's never pretty when love dies.
What would you know about it?
You know, I think you missed
something in these photos.
Yeah, you should check this out.
See right here?
What did I miss?
Oh, God!
I think you broke my nose!
Calm down, big baby.
It's not broken.
Now, I know you're upset with me,
but I'm just doing my job.
You were the one
power-thrusting your secretary.
Executive assistant.
Whatever.
You do the crime, pay the fine.
But...
...she cheated on me first.
God.
You don't need revenge.
You need proof.
Audio. Pictures. Video, if possible.
I get 250 a day, plus expenses.
You wouldn't happen to
have a check with you?
Do you take credit cards?
Dylan!
Did that guy just have a gun?
Here.
What is this? You're gonna like it.
It's something for us to
keep up with the competition.
Marcus.
Dylan, listen, there's three key
ingredients to life and business, okay?
I call it Y.E.L. It's yearning,
earning, and learning.
You know, you really gotta stop
watching those infomercials.
Yeah, and you need to evolve, man.
I'm sorry, there's a
revolution going on, Dylan.
It's called "digital," all right?
There are certain parts of the world,
that consider film kind of old.
Sounds like paradise.
Well, I used your credit
card, so I hope you like it.
Hey. Have you thought about that
conversation we had a couple weeks ago?
At all?
Dylan, Dylan. Look.
Now I'm not saying
that getting your mail
and developing your antiquated
film stock isn't a blast.
But, frankly, I can do more, man.
I want to do more, okay?
I thought this was about
cases of life and death,
not cheating husbands
and insurance fraud.
I want to be your go-to guy, Dylan.
I don't want to be
your go-get guy anymore.
I want to be your partner.
Marcus, I told you.
I can't have a partner.
I'm sorry.
No, that's cool, man.
Hey, speaking of cheating husbands...
...the Collins photos.
Yeah.
Is that even anatomically possible?
Yeah, you do not want to know what
I crawled through to get this picture.
Oh, hey, you got a call today.
Lady in the Garden District.
Said she needs to talk to you.
You hear that?
No. What?
That, my friend, is our fees going up.
The New Orleans Garden District,
where the rich go to live in style.
On in this case, die in style.
Nice first impression.
Might be time for a new car, man.
Hey. It's a classic.
And you go before the car goes.
- Understand?
- Yeah, right. Yep.
You know those guys?
In another life.
First thing you learn
about uptown cases?
They always end up downtown.
If I'd have known where
this one was heading,
I would have turned
it down in a heartbeat.
But you know what they
say about hindsight
it'll screw you every time.
Hi. Can I help you?
No. That's what I do.
I'm Dylan.
I'm not really sure how we do this.
I've never met a private investigator.
Well, why don't you just
tell us why we're here?
My father...
Let me guess. Skipped out on the family?
He was murdered.
And he would never do that. So...
So, you're looking at "the family."
Condolences.
So, what do our friends in
blue have to say about it?
They didn't hear a word I said.
They don't believe me.
They don't believe my story.
They're parked outside just
to convince the neighbours
- that they're safe.
- What?
Why do you think we will?
After the funeral, the
priest gave me this.
I don't do that sort of thing anymore.
Sorry for the confusion.
- Marcus?
- What just happened?
My father was killed
by some kind of monster.
Look, miss, in a moment of trauma,
the mind can play tricks.
Don't give me that crap.
I saw it with my own eyes.
It was huge, thick fur, massive claws.
Sorry, but an investigator
isn't the type of help you need.
I knew you were bullshit.
We'll be in touch. Sorry for your loss!
Thank you for your time.
Damn it, Dylan! What the hell, man?
That girls in trouble.
No, that girl is trouble.
It's not our problem.
Sure. Her father's dead.
She's traumatized.
She's all alone. She needs our help!
Drop it, Marcus. End of discussion.
Okay, stop, listen. Hold on, all right?
Dylan, listen.
This is the first real
case we've seen in years.
Okay, someone who
actually needs our help.
This is exactly what I'm talking about.
Something different, something better!
Don't you want that?
- No, I don't.
- No, you don't.
Because things in life
don't get better, all right?
They either stay the same,
or they get a lot worse.
Five, 10, 20 years from now,
I want every day to be the same.
That's my plan. See you tomorrow.
Good plan. Good. All right.
Yeah, I'll see you tomorrow.
I'll just walk then?
"No pulse? No problem."
What?
That doesn't even make any sense.
Corpus House, the hottest club in town.
A vampire den selling the new
drug absolutely everyone wants.
Keeps you up all night, gives
you the strength of 10 men.
It makes you feel like
you could live forever.
Leave it to vampires to market
their own blood as a thrill ride.
- How much?
- 450.
You've had enough already, Roddy.
I'll let you know when
I had enough, okay?
Roddy!
Roddy!
Shut up!
Yeah!
Vargas.
There was a werewolf murder last night.
An importer named Alfred Ryan. Civilian.
People die, Lorca. Get over it.
This one's different.
Apparently, the wolves at Port
Authority caught wind of something
being brought over from the old country.
The Heart.
Go check it out.
Goddamn breathers.
Hotshot. Party's over.
I'm just getting started.
Yeah!
Someone needs a timeout.
Carry on.
Hey, Dylan.
Hey, man, I wanted to
apologize for earlier.
I shouldn't have said
all that stuff, man.
I mean, it's not my business, and I
feel like I overstepped my boundaries.
So, I'm sorry.
And I'm sure you're right, too.
She was probably just a nut job,
some kind of whack-a-mole.
What was she talking about, anyway?
I mean, it was like something,
some big beast with big fangs and big...
Marcus?
Marcus?
All right. Let's see what we got.
Jesus Christ!
Is it me, or does it look like something
took a bite outta this guy?
Sorry.
With all the dead bodies
I'd seen in my day,
you'd think this would've been easier.
But it wasn't.
Marcus was my friend.
I thought I'd left my
past behind, but sometimes,
it has a way of sneaking up and
punching you square into the present.
It was time to get back to work, fast.
Thought you said I was crazy.
What made you change your mind?
My friend was murdered last night.
Oh, I'm sorry. Who would do that?
Not a who. A what. Whatever
killed wasn't human.
Someone was watching your house.
Someone who wanted to
scare me off your case.
So, you're taking the case?
Maybe.
What killed my father?
A werewolf.
A werewolf? Like in the movies?
Yes and no.
They're not just in Grandma's
cabin out in the woods.
Or only in London. They're here, in
the city, living and working among us.
Most have learned to control the
change, to control the beast inside.
But sometimes the beast
gets loose and you get...
Well, this.
What did your father do for a living?
He was an importer.
I don't know what you're
gonna find in the house.
The police have been all over the place.
Did they check the trees?
The trees?
Werewolves love to use trees.
Most of the earliest European cases
of lycanthropy took place near forests.
Jackpot.
Fascinating.
It's very high-tech.
Undead investigation is old-school.
This is a female werewolf hair,
between her second and third coat
which means she's probably about 18.
That thing was a woman?
That thing was a girl.
What are those?
Hair samples.
The most common way to become a
werewolf is through inheritance.
Like a genetic disorder, it's
passed down from parent to child.
These families, like any Wolf pack,
have identifying colours in their coats.
There are four werewolf
clans in the city.
And they're pretty territorial,
like the mob, so...
...this girl has to be from one of them.
Damn it.
What?
Hey.
What's the problem?
The Cysnos Meatpacking Plant.
Owned and operated by
the Cysnos werewolf clan.
I was hoping I was wrong about
them being mixed up in all of this.
Gabriel and I go way back.
But you know what they
say about werewolf hair.
It doesn't lie.
The thing about Werewolves is
that they don't take too well,
at being accused of murder.
Especially the ones they commit.
Only ten pounds.
You shouldn't be sneaking around.
People might get the wrong idea.
Well, then, it's a good thing
that I'm the only people here.
How's the family, Gabriel?
Excellent. Thank you for asking.
Can you even imagine what it means
for you to walk through
those gates again?
After what happened?
They call you a monster hunter now.
You either have to be really
brave or completely crazy,
to come out of retirement.
Don't worry.
I'm still retired.
Just on one case.
A murder.
A human named Alfred Ryan.
Alfred Ryan. Alfred Ryan.
This name should mean something to me?
I don't know. You tell me.
Someone in your clan killed him.
Accuse one of my family
and you accuse me.
You should know that.
Or have you travelled that
far from the man I once knew?
Hey, I stayed away.
It's your world that came knocking.
And now someone close to me is dead.
Again.
Sorry.
Is this Mara?
How old is she? 17? Must be
on her second coat by now.
Watch yourself, boy.
Out of respect for our past,
I won't kill you where you stand.
You better leave. The others
might not be as understanding.
Cassandra was a beautiful girl.
What happened to her was a tragedy,
but I don't think she
would have wanted this.
And what exactly is "this"?
You, stirring up old
ghosts in her honour.
Cassandra.
I hadn't heard her name
out loud in a long time.
You should've never came back.
You're not welcome here
anymore, little pig.
Wolfgang. Still sore
about our last fight?
My father should've never stuck his
neck out for you with the Truebloods.
He should've let you
roast like I told him to.
You're nothing but a lousy breather.
You hit like a vampire.
You know the last time I tasted human?
They say we ain't allowed no more...
But hey,
rules were meant to be broken.
Oh, that's right. You're not
a big fan of silver, are you?
After shooting the breeze with Wolfgang,
I went to check out the address
I'd found in Gabriels office.
Ten pounds of meat
wasn't much of an order.
Maybe it was being
delivered to a single person.
Maybe someone in hiding.
And sure enough, I hit pay dirt.
I found the monster that
killed my client's father.
Mara?
The bad news? It was
Mara, Gabriels daughter.
That's not a wolf bite.
So, is it over?
Not even close. She was
tortured before she was killed.
Well, that's good. No, not good.
I need to know why.
What are you talking about?
That monster deserved to die.
Lines are being crossed,
the kind that end up starting a war.
Which is why I need to know,
what was your father into?
Now, you listen to me very carefully.
I told you everything.
No, you listen to me.
When I talk about a war,
I don't mean the kind
that you see on the news.
It'll be here, in the
streets, and it'll be bloody.
And before long, that blood
will lead right back here to you.
And when it does, no one
will be able to save you.
Not even me.
Fine.
Okay.
I think I better just show you.
My father told me about this book,
just in case anything
ever happened to him.
After the other night, I checked it.
The objects in this book are
worth around two million dollars.
None of it was touched.
Except for this one artefact.
This one I can't find.
And why didn't you
tell anyone about this?
The things in this book
are not meant for customs.
Your father was a smuggler.
You don't understand.
Somebody like you wouldn't understand.
I don't want anybody to know about this.
Not the police, not anybody.
Because that's not the way
I want him to be remembered.
He was my father.
What is it?
Kill the lights.
Come on!
Let's go!
This way!
Come on!
Dylan?
Where's the Heart?
Dylan!
Get in.
What the hell was that?
Magnesium flare. Burns with
the same intensity as sunlight.
It won't kill them, but
it gave us an opening.
Not that. The part where
you used me as live bait!
Look, you're alive.
Oh, my God!
Dylan!
Dylan, come on!
Come on, do something! Dylan!
Dylan!
Kill it! Do something!
Hang on.
Bull's eye.
What the hell is going on?
Look around you. Look at them.
You think they're all
like you, but they're not.
Someone on this street is
an impostor. A living dead.
The monsters you read about as a kid,
they're real, and they're here.
Werewolves, vampires,
they're everywhere.
Hiding, surviving.
And the key to their survival is making
sure none of us know they're here.
That's why New Orleans
became their Mecca.
Where else could you hide if
you were a creature of the night?
How do you know all this?
There was a pact among all the undead,
to appoint a single human
as impartial inspector.
An investigator.
Someone they could trust to
protect them from themselves,
when one of their own crossed the line.
There was a time when they
trusted me. I kept their secret.
What happened?
I paid a price.
The bite on Mara looked similar
to the one that killed Marcus.
I just had to be sure.
What are we doing here?
I gotta check something out.
Stay here.
Okay. So, I'll just scream if
a killer vampire comes along.
Yeah, yeah, he's fresh. I told
you, three hours in the bag.
Yeah. I don't know.
Phil, how big is he?
He's about 5'9", 170.
Yeah, he's a medium.
I'm sorry, but you needing more larges,
you know, not exactly my problem.
Hey, hey, hey, public
ain't allowed back here.
Shit. it's Dylan.
Phil, Cecil.
Dylan. It's really good to see you, bud.
I thought you was retired.
I'm just here to check out a body.
Came in this morning?
Marcus Deckler?
Yeah, not so much.
Okay, yeah, the kid.
You know, I gotta compliment
you, because you, my friend,
have an excellent eye,
because this kid, he really
took good care of himself.
He's soft, like a lady.
I like that.
Was he a vegetarian or something?
Here he is.
The bite's the same.
Hey.
Where's his left arm?
Told you, dude! I knew
this one was coming back.
Yeah, yeah. Thank you.
What's he talking
about? Why am I freezing?
Where the hell am I? What's going on?
Do you want the good news
or the bad news first?
The good. The bad.
Okay. The bad news is that you're dead.
Look at him!
You're funny. That's funny.
So, what's the good news then?
The good news is that the
condition is manageable.
Wait a minute.
Wait a second.
I'm dreaming.
I'm dreaming. I'm asleep right now.
And you look great! Look at you!
Marcus.
I can like feel you, too.
That's bizarre.
Marcus. No, Marcus. Marcus, stop it.
You look svelte, you look
good, you look clean-out.
Man. I wish you were like this.
Marcus, you're not dreaming.
I think I am.
I think I am.
Oh, no! Oh, no!
What is this? What
is that? What is that?
Mostly your large intestine.
Dylan, we're talking some serious
malpractice shit here, man!
I mean, what are we gonna do about this?
This is gonna get infected!
Well, you don't have to
worry about that anymore.
You're the living dead, Marcus.
The good thing about being the
living dead? No more jogging.
What's up?
How did this happen?
Well, by the looks of it,
you got bitten by a zombie.
Only takes one bad apple
to spoil the whole bunch.
Hey, you know what? Those flesh
eaters, they're not like us.
I mean, they're shredded, they're
ripped, with an attitude to match.
Think Mike Tyson after
you made fun of his lisp,
and that tribal tattoo on his face.
That's the only way we
fit in with them breathers.
We don't eat them, they
don't sever our brain stems.
It's worked out pretty well so far.
Hey, you okay there, pally?
What happened to my arm?
What happened to my...
Marcus!
Marcus was in bad shape,
and I needed to understand
why the undead were on a killing spree.
Luckily, there was Big Al's
Body Shop, where...
Well, you'll see for yourself.
Body shop? What are we doing here?
Seeing an old informant of mine.
Where do you think you're going?
We're closed.
Back off. Or you're gonna need
some serious body work yourself.
Thank you.
Whatever you do, don't scream.
Okay.
What the hell is going on here?
This is a body shop.
Zombies come from all over the
Southeast to get replacement parts.
They rot fast.
These people are zombies?
Think of it as recycling.
No, you don't pick
them out of the bayou.
They're as fresh as your mother's...
I gotta call you back.
Holy rotting shit.
Dylan.
Big Al. How's the parts business?
Listen, man, I don't know
how to say this exactly,
but the word on the street is that
you went, well, postal a ways back.
So, do I gotta be worried?
Relax, Al.
I'm just here to drop
someone off for work.
Tell your hunchback he's
in the trunk of my car.
Who's your friend, Dylan? She's
got some nice parts on her.
She's a client.
So, I had a little run-in
with the Truebloods tonight.
Oh, yeah? Really?
Not a happy reunion?
Who's running the show these days?
Vargas. He runs the Corpus House now.
The creep who peddles
vampire blood to civilians?
Yeah, well,
I guess the peddling business
is starting to pay off.
He's got himself a corner office now.
I mean, especially since
Trueblood upper management
was sent to greener pastures.
If I had to guess, I'd say he's
the one been spreading the word
about you being this venator,
that everyone's been
talking about, capisce?
- There's a venator around?
- Yeah.
What's a venator?
It's Latin, short for monstro venatorum.
Monster hunters.
Religious nut jobs, mostly.
Running around with silver bullets
and wooden stakes and holy water.
Jeez.
We thought them days
was done, but lately...
Lately what?
Few of the dead missing here and there.
Some whispers. Nothing for sure.
Man, you have been out of the loop.
And you wouldn't happen to be profiting
from any of this now, would you, Al?
I'm offended, Dylan.
You know I run a clean operation here.
This ain't no chop shop.
Right. Well, you keep
those big ears open, Al.
You near of anything that I need to know,
you be sure to give me a call.
Well, all right, then.
You take it easy, Dylan.
You hear me?
And do yourself a favour.
Stay away from Corpus House.
I got some bad news, Lorca.
Big Al's informant said he
saw one of our Truebloods
running away from where
that bitch wolf died.
Do you have any clue of the heat
that you could bring on us?
Of what we have at stake?
We have been waiting hundreds of years.
Look at me!
Hundreds, to finally come out of hiding.
To claim our rightful place
at the top of the food chain.
To stop living off of human table scraps
like some roving pack of cockroaches.
No! No more.
The human race is obsolete, y'all.
Now, how do we do this? It's simple.
The Heart of Belial.
Which Lorca here has not only
failed to find, but he's...
He has managed to expose us...
...to Dylan.
I don't need to explain to
you what it means to a vampire
to be buried alive, right?
The claustrophobia, the insects,
the worms eating away at your brain.
And yet you can never die.
It wasn't me. I couldn't find it.
Lorca, I want to
believe you. I really do.
So, you know what?
I'm gonna give you a little
bit of time to think it over.
Okay. How about 20 years?
Okay?
Okay. Okay.
Vargas.
Vargas! No, Vargas!
Vargas!
No! Please!
No! No!
I'm not sure that I understand.
It's almost like you're saying that
monster hunters are the bad guys,
which really doesn't make any sense,
because since when are
monsters the good guys?
Well, that all depends on who
you think the monsters are.
Where the hell am I? What's that smell?
You.
Oh, man.
Oh, my God! What's wrong with my arm?
Dylan, what's wrong with
my arm? What happened?
Relax. It's a loaner.
A loaner?
Yes. They were out of
Caucasian in your size.
Out of... Are you listening
to what you're saying?
My arm is brown!
And I'm not even married.
Marcus.
You are a zombie. Now pay attention.
Floor cleaner is your new deodorant.
Wisk takes the place of soap.
Green cleaner will keep
your eyes from yellowing up,
and bleach is for your teeth.
This is your new beauty regimen,
and you can never take a day off.
You're a funny guy. You're a funny guy.
I've been telling you for
years you had it in you.
You're just always so
serious. I'm starving.
Marcus, no, you cannot eat that!
Marcus, I'm trying to help you.
I already started,
and they are delicious.
So, I already know you're lying.
I'm like loving this.
Oh, God.
Marcus, this is the zombie buffet.
I'm fine. I'm fine.
Can you just drive
me to, like, a clinic?
And get me like a B-12 shot,
or something to that effect?
Might make me feel...
We don't have time for this.
You want me to show
you your stomach again?
You're a zombie now. You either
eat this or live human flesh.
You know that hungry
feeling in your stomach?
It's only gonna grow worse if you
don't eat. Then you rot and die.
I think I'm gonna be sick.
Okay, here's what we're gonna do.
I'm not gonna eat that.
And we're gonna forget
that you suggested it,
'cause it's disgusting.
Ghouls.
Oh, my God.
Ghouls? And these ghouls would be?
Can we crack a window, please?
Funny. Dead guy joke.
Everyone's a comedian. Jesus.
It's just that it smells so bad.
Maybe it's you. Maybe you
smell. Ever think about that?
Ghouls are humans
addicted to vampire blood.
Gives them incredible
strength and perpetual youth.
Like vampires. Just, I've never
seen it this popular before.
You're just making this shit
up as you go, aren't you?
Take her back to the office.
It's not safe here.
Well, what about you?
I'll be fine.
If I'm not back in an hour,
call in a bomb scare.
There was only one way to get into
Corpus House if you weren't a vampire.
And that was as ghoul
addicted to their blood.
Luckily, I knew the game.
All I needed was proof.
Welcome to Corpus House.
My only lead was a teenage vamp
who disappeared at Mara's place.
My options were running out,
or always running away.
I'm looking for a friend of mine.
Maybe you can help me out.
He's a Trueblood.
About 5'7", early-20s-looking, thin.
Kind of looks like one of
those shaved cats? You know?
Thanks a lot. You're a help.
You're requested upstairs.
And what if I don't wanna go?
Then we get to play
squash with your balls.
And here I thought I wasn't
gonna get lucky tonight.
You know what I'm talking about.
I saw you down there with that little...
Hey... Lookie here, hey!
What's up, Dylan?
Welcome to Corpus House.
I'm sorry, welcome back.
Have a seat. Take a load off.
Can I get you a drink, a shot?
Hey, hey, hey, don't do that.
Don't do that. Don't be rude.
Now, I know you and this building
have a lot of history here,
but I assure you, I don't
want no kind of trouble.
Really?
Then what's this I
hear about you spreading
stories about me being a monster hunter?
Are you kidding? After what you did?
Oh, man. My only regret is that...
And I told them. I wanted
to get you a fruit basket.
I mean, for real,
if you hadn't killed off
all those elders from back in the day,
I'd be paying dues for
like another century
before getting the chance
to run things around here.
And now look at me.
I'm king of the world!
So, thanks, pal.
Pal.
If we're such good friends,
then why don't you tell me why
one of your boys killed a werewolf
and why a few more tried
to kill a client of mine?
I'm sorry to hear that.
But, no, that's not one of my boys.
Well, then I guess you won't
mind if I have a look around,
you know, for old times' sake.
I mean, I don't know of any club
owner that would agree to that.
I wasn't asking permission.
Take a look around you, Jack.
Things have changed.
We don't need you anymore.
So, take some friendly advice from me
and go back to spying on your Motel Sixes,
or whatever it is that you do...
...and let me advance the race.
You're in on this, Vargas.
And when I can prove it,
you'll be seeing me again.
But next time, I won't be so polite.
Like I always say, the secret
to good detecting? Get lucky.
What's your problem?
I'd be careful if I were you.
These are wood-tipped bullets.
"Theodore Cuff, 114 Avenue C."
What's your Trueblood name, Theodore?
Slake.
Tell me about Mara Cysnos.
I'm not telling you anything.
How long ago were you bitten, Teddy?
You don't look like you've
been eternal more than 10 years.
It'd be a real shame to die so soon.
Bite me.
Why did you kill Mara?
And why were the Truebloods after her?
If you kill me, you'll never find it.
I'm the only one who knows where it is.
Is this what you're
talking about? What is this?
Not very cool, Teddy. Not very cool.
Put him down.
What the hell are you?
See? That's just what this case needed.
A seven-foot tall,
flesh-eating zombie.
Which begs the question, are there
any actual people left in New Orleans?
So, you really don't know what happened
between Dylan and those vampires?
No, you know, he doesn't
really talk about it that much.
I think it may have something to
do with his fiance a few years ago.
She left him?
No, not exactly. She's...
Yikes. You look like crap.
Thanks, Mary Kay.
We've got a lead. Leave in 30 minutes.
Wait, what? Not you.
I just about died tonight. I need
to know you're somewhere safe.
Well, what about me?
Why do I have to go?
Because you're already dead.
I'm already dead.
Oh, my God! What have you done?
I look like a dead hooker!
It was a shame Slake turned
out to be a dead-end. Literally.
But at least his driver's license
led me straight to his crummy apartment.
I was hoping we'd find the
cross, or at least a clue.
Yeah, you should trash the place.
That's good.
'Cause, you know, Slake won't mind.
Oh, man.
I didn't know Apple made coffins.
Hey, I thought vampires
didn't show up on film.
No, it's mirrors they've got no
reflection in. They photograph just fine.
Let me see.
It's Mara, the dead werewolf.
She was dating a vampire.
That's a new one.
We've gotta go to a funeral.
You haven't eaten yet, have you?
Maybe I'm just sick.
Maybe I'm just really sick!
Did you ever think about that, Dylan?
'Cause I'm pretty sure my
HMO is not gonna cover this.
You need to fix this, all right?
I'm pretty sure my insurance policy
isn't a zombie plan, all right?
You need to fix this!
You shot me!
Oh, my God, Dylan, why
would you do that? I'm hit!
I'm hit.
This doesn't hurt.
Marcus? You are dead.
Now, you can pity yourself and
die a slow, miserable death.
Or you can define
yourself as you want to.
But I can't make that decision for you.
Well, you didn't have to shoot me.
Seeing Gabriel at his daughter's
funeral was hard enough.
But accusing her and her
vampire boyfriend of murder,
might have been what
some call "bad" manners.
I knew Gabriel would shoot
me straight, or kill me.
Maybe both.
They say if you live long enough,
you live to see everything.
This is one sight I
wished they had spared me.
I'm sorry about Mara, Gabriel.
I truly am.
But I need answers.
That vampire boy came to me,
pleading for his life.
Told me everything about
his relationship with Mara.
Everything.
He didn't kill my daughter.
Gabriel, we've known
each other a long time.
What is it that you're hiding from me?
What does it have to do with this?
I didn't know they would do that.
The idealism of youth, I suppose.
Thinking they could bring peace to
centuries of war by stealing a trinket.
They didn't know it would
awaken a sleeping beast.
So much bloodshed. And for what?
Wait, what beast are you...
It's our matter to deal with, not yours.
It's too late. I'm in it now.
When I get to the bottom of this,
someone is gonna pay.
I hope that it won't be you.
Gabriel was a dead-end.
Or maybe he was just trying to
protect me from his daughter's fate.
What the hell are you doing?
I was just...
She's very beautiful.
She was.
What happened?
I mean, you don't need to tell me.
I just thought you might want to.
When I came home that night,
I could sense that something was wrong.
The apartment just felt colder.
I headed straight to Corpus House.
I knew. I just knew it was them.
And when I saw her
lying there on the floor,
I lost it.
Nothing was gonna stop me
until I made them all pay.
And they did.
All of them.
They took something
precious from both of us.
I can't.
Three deluxe cheeseburgers
with extra cheese and bacon
and jalapenos and mushrooms and onions.
Some cheesy fries...
...some deep-fried cheesy strings...
...and Diet Coke.
Right.
I got you.
Hey, Tommy! Let me get a number nine!
What's a number nine?
Exactly, dude.
Exactly.
Number nine. It's up.
What the hell is this?
This is not what I ordered.
A worm-meal and a larva patty.
A warm cup of motor oil.
And a complimentary hot dog.
Why is there a hot dog?
Not hot dogs! Not hot dogs!
That's so disgusting!
Do you have any idea how many
hot dogs I ate as a child?
You know what? I'm not gonna do it.
I'm not gonna do it!
Forget it! Forget it!
Why don't you just take your cataracts
and your weird face pustule
and your bleeding gums
and your ass breath, and
you go die with some dignity,
like I intend to do.
Good day, sir.
You shouldn't treat them like that.
He's a person, too, you know.
You know what?
Sweetheart, I don't think you understand
what you're talking about, okay?
Yeah. I think I do.
Here.
Oh, no. Is this some kind
of, like, religious thing?
Just read it.
Is this a zombie support group?
And you should totally come by.
It's just a bunch of us
getting together and talking.
Trust me. It helps.
I needed answers from an old friend.
A really old friend.
Borelli was bat-shit crazy, but let's
see you when you're 800 years old.
I always like you, Dylan.
Yeah, yeah.
Life is wasted on the mortal.
And other women?
You never change, do you?
Dylan, look at me.
Centuries on this earth, and still
I cannot find a wife to live past 98.
Handsome young man. You'll find another.
Yeah, well, not like Cassandra.
How very true.
This really takes me back.
Dante.
I tell you something,
that man could drink.
So, what do I owe the honour?
What do you know about this?
It's nothing. Old ghost story.
Borelli, I need to know.
People are dying because of this.
What is it?
You tell no one that
I told you this, okay?
It is called the Heart of Belial.
And it's been missing for centuries.
Five thousand years ago,
Belial walked the earth.
It was the most powerful of the dead.
He brought darkness and
death upon the whole world.
It is called the Heart of Belial,
because inside the Heart
is the blood of Belial.
Belial cannot be
destroyed, only contained.
The myth says that on the
night of the full moon,
Belial can be created again.
All the creator needs
is the Heart and a host.
A host?
A body, one of the undead.
The Heart of Belial injects
the blood into the host.
Once that happens, the host is doomed.
Belial lives again,
answerable only to his creator.
What the creator hates, Belial hates.
What the creator seeks to
destroy, Belial destroys.
But, in order to destroy Belial,
you must first kill his master.
It's a, how do you say,
symbiotic relationship.
Their souls are
inseparably bonded together.
Great.
Dylan, 400 years ago,
the Heart was stolen.
This symbol is the crest of the
last great monstro venatorum.
They found the Heart and planned to
use it to wipe out all the undead.
But the hunters themselves were
massacred before they could use it.
The legend says a werewolf family
was entrusted to hide the
Heart over the centuries,
and to keep its secret.
Gabriel.
I called, to rendezvous at Cysnos Plant.
I was hoping Gabriel
would stay clear of this.
But my gut knew this
wasn't gonna end well.
What the hell happened?
What's wrong? Is it bad?
It's worse.
Search for others. Hurry.
Gabriel.
There is not much time.
Please, tell them that
Slake told me the Heart...
Dylan, there's nobody.
...Sclavi.
You must find Sclavi.
What did that to him?
Same thing that killed you and Mara.
Wait. The zombie? The big zombie?
Sclavi.
I gotta check something out.
Call Wolfgang. Make sure you're
not around when he gets here.
Yeah.
Hi. I don't really know what to say.
I guess I'm Marcus.
And I'm...
I'm dead.
Hi, Marcus.
Hey, everybody.
So, yeah. So, it's
been a rough adjustment.
You know, the smell, the diet,
the whole...
...things-falling-off-of-you thing.
Yeah, this guy knows
what I'm talking about.
- You get used to it.
- No, I won't.
But right now I have a big problem.
Okay? I'm looking for a zombie.
I'm looking for a massive zombie.
And he's bigger and
stronger than anything...
...I've ever seen.
And he's a killer.
We thought those were just rumours.
They say he lives in the abandoned
power building outside of town.
In the forbidden ward.
Marcus, you have to be careful.
There's no room for heroes
in the world of zombies.
Believe me.
We come from a long and proud
history of being cowards.
Marcus?
Marcus?
If I'm not back in an hour,
call in a bomb scare.
Hey.
Hey.
You really don't know
anything else about this?
No, I mean, it was
stolen from my father.
Right, well, it was
never his to begin with.
I mean, it belonged to the Werewolves.
Your father had to have known
that this wasn't just some
goddamned heirloom for sale.
Mara killed him to get it back.
That's...
But you said the
vampires were behind this.
Not exactly.
Mara gave the Heart to her vampire
boyfriend, Slake, who hid it.
And when Mara was killed,
he told the one person that
he could trust where it was,
Gabriel.
Now all three of them are dead.
Does the word "Sclavi"
mean anything to you?
No.
I have been pointing the finger
at Gabriel, my oldest friend.
A man of honour.
Now he's dead.
Crossing the line? Yeah, perhaps.
But I'm not exactly billing her for it.
I knew Elizabeth was still in danger.
Being caught up in a world where
you don't belong isn't natural.
I was well aware of that at
one time. And so was Cassandra.
Morning.
Good morning.
This is a talisman.
As long as you're wearing it,
vampires can't touch you.
You'll be safe.
Thank you.
Dylan. You are not gonna believe what I.
Hi, Elizabeth.
You're...
I shouldn't have barged in.
I'm just not used to you...
I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go. I just...
I guess we could just
talk about the location
of the flesh-eating zombie
when you guys are done...
...boning.
I'm gonna go. I'm really sorry.
Marcus. Come back, Marcus.
So, you and Elizabeth?
I think it's great.
She seems really sweet. She seems
to like you, you seem to like her.
It's great. You gotta move on, right?
I mean, it's you know...
It's been some time.
And you gotta kind of just
do what the heart...
Shut up, or I'm gonna shoot you again.
The big zombie was the key.
I just didn't know how
he fit into all this.
This place is like a maze, Dylan.
You know your way around here?
Yeah, a little bit. Came with the job.
The zombies turned it into a
penal colony a few years ago.
They banish the ones who become
too dangerous or too decayed.
Only the strongest survive.
And the others get eaten.
"The others get eaten"?
You mean, like, cannibal zombies?
Duck. What?
Duck.
What the hell was that?
Dum-dums. Zombie Stoppers.
Cute.
Sorry. Come on, we gotta go.
Oh, my God. Wait, Dylan.
If I ever get like that, you'll...
Don't worry. I'll take care of it.
Oh, you'll take care of it.
Good, that's great. Thanks, Kevorkian.
So, looks like there's
no zombies down here,
so that's gotta be a good thing, right?
Not exactly.
This place is more overcrowded
than Riker's Island.
If there are no zombies here, it's
because they're afraid of something.
Great.
I'm going down.
You're going down?
You're going down there...
...with the skulls and the bones
and the cannibal zombies?
Okay, I'm gonna stay up here.
I'll Keep watch, 'cause
I haven't gone bananas.
Yet.
Definitely a flesh-eater.
What are you looking at?
Vampire blood from Corpus House.
Someone's been controlling it.
Dylan?
You okay?
I'm sorry.
Oh, my God!
Dylan!
Oh, my God! Oh, my
God! Dylan, get me up!
Dylan! Dylan!
What are you doing up there?
Oh, they're filthy! They're filthy!
Dylan!
Dylan! Hurry up! They're gonna eat me!
Stop! I'm one of you! I'm one of you!
Oh, my God, they're touching me!
They're touching me!
They're cold and they're
wet and they're touching me!
Dylan, please! Dylan!
Marcus.
You're my hero.
What are those?
Wooden bullets.
What are the wooden bullets for?
Think about it.
Who's had all the opportunity in
the world to know about the Heart?
Who's been following me,
probably since I took this case?
And who has everything to gain
from wiping out all the undead?
I'm gonna guess someone who
doesn't like wooden bullets?
Vargas has been in on
this since the start.
Vargas.
So, what's the plan?
No plan.
Just bigger guns.
Open those.
Dylan.
What is your problem?
What is my problem?
I told you that I'd be back.
No!
What's wrong, you
don't like the sunlight?
Maybe you can help me with
something. Where's the Heart?
What?
What are you talking about? I don't
know what you're talking about.
Wrong answer, bloodsucker.
- You're killing him!
- I know.
Okay, all right! Okay, stop it!
Okay. Yes. I had my people
looking for the Heart.
But can you blame me?
The thing is, it's a nuclear bomb, man.
Whoever controls Belial...
...controls the world.
What is "Sclavi"?
Sclavi? What do you mean, Sclavi?
Okay, okay, I was just kidding,
I was just kidding.
Sclavi, okay.
Sclavi is a vampire.
One of the elders that helped
build Corpus House. All right?
And where would I find him?
He's a sleeper.
He's a sleeper. Why do you even care?
Okay, just leave me alone.
I got pus all over my sheets.
Maybe you should get some vitamin E.
We'll be back in a little bit.
Yeah, and some, like, healing aloe!
We've got half an hour before
the sun sets. Let's move.
Well, where are we going?
He said Sclavi was a sleeper.
This is where they keep their relatives.
Sort of like a retirement home.
In a crummy shipyard?
Well, would you have
thought to look here?
So, what are these
crazy symbols everywhere?
They're vampire blood types.
Each family has its own type.
What's that?
Vampire blood.
Thought so.
"Sergio."
"Sclavi." Here he is.
There's the Heart.
Oh, my God.
Looks like my grandfather on prom night.
They're sleeping.
Sorry.
Oh, Jesus.
I'm not gonna grab that.
Are you kidding me?
Look, he's got a death
grip on it, literally.
Your limbs are replaceable.
Yeah, we already replaced one.
It was great for me. Remember that?
Fine.
You're a detective.
Just, you can get it.
Just be careful when you do it, okay?
Don't just grab it, okay.
Yeah.
Tenderly, okay?
Okay.
Oh, my God! Dylan, oh, my God!
Run and save yourself!
What happened?
I guess you'll never know.
I'm not built for this, man.
I'm not built for this.
I think I just leaked something.
Oh, my God.
You know, for someone who
thinks he's pretty smart,
I certainly get the crap
kicked out of me a lot.
Oh, crap.
Dearly beloved,
We have gathered here tonight to
pay our finial respects to Dylan,
a breather who didn't
have enough good sense
to keep his dumb ass retired.
Please, don't interrupt the eulogy.
I'll have you all know that I've been
crafting that for quite some time now.
But recent events have
overshadowed my prepared remarks.
I mean, what can I say about a man who...
...not only killed off all of my Corpus
House competition back in the day
but also brought...
I'm sorry, I told myself
that I wouldn't cry.
He also brought us the Heart of Belial.
I mean, sure, we've had some
tough moments, some ups and downs...
...but time heals most wounds.
And if the rest of your life
weren't so regrettably brief,
you would see that I
am a really fast healer.
Let go of me.
Oh, I almost forgot. I love
surprises. Here, bring her up.
Guess who we found in your
shitty-ass little office? Come here.
You little dog, you. Freaky-deaky.
Why do you always pick
the prettiest girls?
I swear, if I didn't need a vessel
to turn into Belial, she would...
You, young lady, would make a
great addition to my little clan.
Mix it up a bit? Get away
from me. Go on, take her.
You know, she kind of
reminds me of Cassandra.
Right? Yeah, I knew
you were thinking it.
She was a fighter. Yeah.
And you know what?
It made her blood taste
just a little bit sweeter.
Easy. You calm down.
Come on, how else was I supposed to
get rid of all those old bastards?
You did the work for me, Quick-Draw.
I swear.
You humans, you're
predictable to a fault.
You pull one string, a leg moves.
You pull another, you pull out a gun.
It's pathetic.
I'm gonna kill you.
Okay.
Me first.
Vargas!
Well, this is a setback.
Dylan? I feel like I've been stepped on.
Dylan? Where the hell
are we? Where are we?
We're in a crypt.
We're in a crypt?
What are we doing in a crypt?
Are you kidding me?
Dylan. Dylan!
Oh, my God, I need to call someone.
Just hold on, just
don't panic, all right?
Just calm down. Calm down! Stop.
911, what's your emergency?
- Hello?
- Hello.
Yes, yes. We're trapped in a crypt.
We're trapped in a crypt.
And I don't know where it is,
but it's dark,
and it's cold, and it smells like shit!
Can you give me your location?
And I'm trapped down
here with my friend.
And he doesn't know where we are,
and he's really scared.
He's really scared,
and I'm trying to keep him...
- I'm sorry, you're breaking up.
- Can you hear me?
"More bars guaranteed," my undead ass!
- Dylan! Dylan!
- Marcus!
- Marcus!
- No! What?!
Be quiet, please.
Listen, Dylan, I'm just
trying to think. All right?
What, what is it?
Little-known fact. Zombies are
actually world-class diggers.
Dylan, are you implying that I dig
us out of the dark, scary crypt?
Bingo.
No. Nope, no. Not gonna happen. Not.
Hey, hey, big guy! Big guy!
Big guy! No, it's not happening.
No, no, no, no, no, no! No, no, no!
Dylan, no!
I hate you.
That's not bad, actually.
Who's your go-to guy now?
Not bad for a zombie.
Shit.
What?
She wasn't wearing the talisman.
We're gonna save her.
I mean, we're on our way. We're going.
She's not the one I'm worried about.
What's the matter, pumpkin?
Why the long face?
Don't worry, I'm not gonna kill you.
As a matter of fact,
you're gonna live forever.
Yeah, see, if the myths of Belial
are true, you may even outlive me.
But not before you've
brought every undead race
down to their knees before me.
Who knows, maybe the living, too.
On, yeah. We're making you one
of us, if only for a brief moment.
See, only the undead can become Belial.
I know, I know...
I didn't make up the rules.
I have a confession to make.
I'm probably going to enjoy this.
Mors tua, vita mea.
I'm sorry?
It's an old family saying.
It means, "Your death is my life."
Sassy!
Where is the Heart?
It was Elizabeth the entire time.
She was the one controlling
the tattooed zombie,
and she was the one who had to
kill Gabriel, Slake, and you.
All of them? I knew it.
She's a monster hunter,
just like her father.
Hey, should I have a gun?
I should have a gun, right?
Looks like she's trying
to fulfil her legacy.
Call Wolfgang. Tell him
to bring in the cavalry.
Come on.
Stop! Don't do it, Elizabeth.
I knew that you were the only one
who would find it for me, Dylan.
You of all people should
understand what I'm doing.
You should understand why.
Oh, I understand why.
But this revenge, or whatever
it is, is not the answer.
This has nothing to do with
my father being murdered.
This is much bigger than that.
We are the good guys.
By slaughtering millions
of innocent undead?
No, that's where
you're wrong, Elizabeth.
We're the good guys.
And you're the monster.
I wish that I could make you understand.
No, don't!
Come on!
No!
Great.
Oh, my God.
Hang on, Dylan!
Dylan!
Not so fast! Stay away from him!
Stop it! Marcus!?
Elizabeth!?
Marcus, seriously.
Hey!
Zombie power, bitch.
Stop! You answer to me.
Our enemies are the monsters
outside these walls, not here.
I am your master!
Well, what do we got here?
Monster hunter in over her head?
You think you can wipe us
all out with your pet monster?
Well, guess what, piglet.
We're still here.
And now, it's dying time.
Man.
We're so discussing a raise.
Good work, Dylan.
A lot of people died for this.
I need someone I can
trust to hold onto it.
I'm sorry about your father.
He was a good man.
I wouldn't count my
father out that fast.
Why don't you come down
to the plant sometime?
But this time, leave the silver at home.
Yeah.
Let's go.
You all right? You look like hell.
Yeah.
Next time, I pick the clients, okay?
Hey. I feel like I have
something in my eye.
Do I have something in my eyes?
No.
It's fine? Yeah.
I can't... It feels weird.
Call us a cab.
Okay. Here.
Just do it, please. Thank you.
You know what? Let me... I'll throw
that away. Let me, I'll get that.
It's all right.
You know, I'm gonna hang onto
it for a little while, actually.
I need to get some more
copies for my partner.
Okay, I'll take care of that?
Sure.
I'll get right on it.
Wait, partner? Oh, my God, Dylan?
Did you just say "partner"?
I mean, by partner,
I assume you're talking...
Of course you're talking about me.
Oh, my God, man! Oh, this is great!
I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I don't mean...
I know you're in pain. I'm sorry.
If I had another arm
right now, I would hug you.
And, you know, we'll get you,
get you a new arm. Fresh eyes.
You know what? This arm?
Actually I'm kind of starting to dig it.
Smells like Old Spice.
Reminds me of my dad.
Wait, eyes? What are you talking about?
You'll see.
Come on. I'll buy you a hot dog.
I ate a worm tonight. Not so bad.
Pretty good, actually.