El Diablo (1990) Movie Script
(birds twittering)
(dog barking)
(chicken clucking)
(dog whimpers)
(distant horse neighing)
(noisy chattering)
Oops! Sorry. I'm sorry.
(clucking)
Good morning, Sheriff Epworth.
Good morning, Billy Ray.
I'll bet you ain't never
seen a day as pretty
as this back East in...
Boston.
Actually, Boston can be
quite beautiful, Sheriff.
Ho, ho, ho!
Ho, ho, ho!
Oh, Nettie!
I'm sorry, Mama.
Billy Ray is here.
I never
would have known.
Nettie, no more Billy Ray.
It's Mr. Smith, okay?
(knock on door)
Okay.
Morning, Billy Ray.
(sighs)
Billy Ray:
Nettie.
Morning, Mrs. Tuleen.
Oh, Nettie.
Nettie, you need
to be careful.
I'll get them.
I'll get them.
You have to take care
of these books,
you know?
Do you ever think
about me, Billy Ray?
Of course I do.
I usually wonder
whether you're doing
your homework or not.
No. I mean,
do you ever think of me
as a... as a woman?
Someday, Nettie,
you're going to be
a very beautiful woman.
In other words,
you don't.
Nettie, let me
tell you something.
When you're a little girl,
all you want is to become
a woman.
But when you're
a grown woman,
you realize
how important it is
to be a little girl.
Now, it's different
for a man.
I mean, when he's a boy,
he's expected to behave
and mind his folks.
But when
he becomes a man,
I mean,
he has to stand tall,
speak the truth,
make an honest
day's living,
and be able
to look any other man
straight in the eye
without flinching.
Man:
Good morning,
Billy Ray!
Good morning, Charlie.
Beautiful morning
for procreation.
"Be fruitful and multiply,"
sayeth the Lord.
(Charlie laughs)
Billy Ray!
Seven minus three
equals...
Now, think about this
for a minute, Lon.
Let's say
you had seven chickens,
and your neighbor came over
and took away three of them.
How many
would you have left?
Well, I think I'd have seven
'cause my daddy'd shoot him
before he got out
the henhouse.
(students laugh)
I think that's enough
arithmetic for today, Lon.
Why don't you sit down?
(students snickering)
We're starting a new
"Kid Durango" book today.
(students cheer)
This is one
my personal favorites.
Is there a girl
in this one, Billy--
I mean, Mr. Smith?
Yes, there is, Nettie.
Boys:
Aw!
I think there's something
in here for everyone.
If you prefer, we could
go back to the arithmetic.
All:
No!
"Kid Durango of Arizona:
the Dust Devils."
"The layer of dew
that covered the prairie
"disappeared quickly
"as the sun rose
over the foothills.
"The moon hung around
for a while
"and then sunk
far below the ranges.
"The day began like
a thousand other Arizona days.
"That was...
"until the cloud came.
"It began on the horizon--"
"shadows of dust
moving at great speed..."
"and then the pounding hooves
on the hard ground."
"As the whirlwind
got closer,
"you could see
into the dust--
"the shapes of horses
and then the riders,
"riders with guns
on both hips
"and bandoliers
across their chests."
"They rode hard."
"They rode with a purpose."
"As they approached
the town,"
"they reined back
on their horses."
(horse neighs)
Man: They're coming!
"The dust around them settled,
"and you could see
their faces,
"faces weathered
by the Mexican sun,
faces marked by violence."
(horse neighing)
(chuckles)
"When the citizens
of the town saw the riders,
"they instinctively withdrew
"into the shadows
of the boardwalk.
"Many of the merchants
"went inside their shops
and locked their doors.
"Shades came down,
closed signs appeared
as the town prepared
to look the other way."
(voices murmuring)
"It was pretty clear
why they were there.
"They had an appointment
at the bank,
and it wasn't
to make a deposit."
(laughs)
(man laughing)
(man chuckling)
"They were a ruthless band
of thieves and killers
with no regard
for human life."
"It was as if they were
put on this earth by the devil
"to torment decent,
God-fearing folks
who worked hard
to make an honest living."
(gunshot echoes)
That was a gunshot.
(students murmuring)
It's just like
in the story, Billy Ray.
(students chattering)
What?
They got guns!
They're coming
this way!
Everybody, stay in your seats!
Stay in your seats!
Stay in your seats!
Get back!
Lon, get out of the way.
Wait. No...
Get out of the way now.
No, no, no!
Stay-- stay in here! Stay!
Net-- Nettie, move! Move.
This is real, Nettie!
Nettie!
Vengase, seorita!
Billy Ray:
Nettie!
Hyah! Hyah! Hyah!
Let me go!
Mister, please,
put her down. Uh...
Let me go! Billy?
Seor?
Billy!
Please, seor-- seoro?
Uh, hola?
(laughing)
Seor?
Please! Billy Ray?
(muttering)
Nettie! Drop...
Gringo!
Uh... wait.
Wait! Nettie! Nettie!
Billy Ray!
Billy! Help me!
(grunting)
Muy macho, gringo!
(laughing)
(grunting)
Billy!
(man laughing)
Who in the hell was that?
They shot Harold
and Mr. West.
Where the hell is
the sheriff?
Sleeping, probably.
Well, somebody go wake him up.
Tell him to round up a posse.
Robbed the bank!
Woman: They took
the Tuleen girl!
Woman 2:
Oh my gosh!
Man:
Hey, hey, mount up!
All right, I'm with you!
Somebody go get Jake!
Man:
I think they rode
south, boys!
Come on, men! Let's go.
Billy Ray?
Billy Ray,
you all right?
You're looking
kind of peaked.
Somebody better
go get the doc.
Mother:
They have my Nettie!
(men chattering)
Man:
No, I haven't heard anything.
Is my daughter there?
Can anyone see
my Nettie there?
Billy Ray, can you see?
My eyes aren't what
they used to be.
Man:
Yeah. Horses.
Man 2:
Look at that.
They're back.
Man 3:
Looks like
just one rider, huh?
I don't think
there's anybody
on them horses.
I see the sheriff.
Man: Naw!
I swear that's him.
Is that the sheriff?
Yeah, that's him.
Where are the others?
Man:
Where'd they all go?
The sheriff,
he don't look so good.
Somebody get the doc!
Man:
That's Jethro's horse.
Where the hell's Jethro?
There's blood
on the saddle.
What the hell
happened, Sheriff?
Oh, Lordy.
They've cut out his tongue!
(grunting)
(sighs)
Ex-- excuse me, Deputy.
Did you say that
they cut out his tongue?
Man:
Hey! Here it is,
right here!
(body thuds)
Man:
Now even if we could
get a posse together,
we wouldn't know
where to find him.
US government
and the Federales
been searching
for him for years.
I'll tell you something
about this El Diablo.
They did find him once.
Caught him down in Amos,
a little border town
north of Laredo.
Caught him,
tried him, and hanged him
all in the same night,
but he wouldn't die.
He just hanged there
by his neck,
spitting at the crowd
like they disgusted him.
Cussed 'em out so bad,
the womenfolk had to go home.
I was there
when they cut him down.
And I thanked the Lord
I left when I did.
'Cause three days later--
so the story goes--
El Diablo returned to Amos
with his men
and cut out the heart
of every man, woman, and child
in the whole blessed town
and just left 'em there
to bleach in the sun.
(crying)
Pretty soon,
they started to rot.
And then
the buzzards come
and started
pecking out what's left
of their eyeballs--
Now, Spivey,
that's enough of that!
Devil don't never die!
No, sir!
So no one
is going to do anything
about getting my Nettie back!
Probably already
cut out her heart
and eaten it!
Oh my God!
I didn't say nothing
about eating their hearts.
He just cut them out
and left.
Spivey!
Well, I'm sorry, Deputy.
Or are you
the sheriff now?
'Cause if you are,
then it's your responsibility
to go after El Diablo.
(crowd agreeing)
Man:
What are you going to do
about it, Sheriff?
Well, in the last report,
the doc said that
the sheriff's feeling
much better.
(clucking)
And I suppose
he's been working
on his sign language too.
(all laughing)
Spivey's right.
You're the new sheriff.
We pay your wage.
Man: That's right.
I intend
to bring Nettie back.
Man:
That's Billy Ray!
(all chattering)
How you planning
on doing that, boy?
I said, I intend
to bring back Nettie.
You and who else,
schoolteacher?
He can't get
El Diablo with a book!
Well... me and Kid Durango,
that's who.
(men laughing)
I mean,
Kid Durango and I.
Hey, Charlie,
you got competition.
Man:
Can't even shoot a gun!
Billy Ray!
Oh, I intend to learn
to shoot a gun.
El Diablo is sure
gonna drop a load of manure
in his pants
when he sees you
a'coming at him.
(laughs)
Well, I do know one man.
My second cousin,
Maggie Sue's brother-in-law,
JD Shones.
Yeah?
He's some kind
of lawman now.
Texas Ranger.
He's supposed to have rode
with Kid Durango.
Tell you the truth,
we never had
all that much
to do with him.
He's sort of the disgrace
of the family, you know?
He shot and killed
my cousin Deke
about eight years ago
up in Sonoma.
He also shot and killed
my daddy's brother Edward.
Where is he now?
Well, last time I heard,
he was up in Millennium.
Some kind of marshal
or ranger up there.
Hell, ain't but
a turd's difference
between old JD
and the scum he hauls in.
But if anybody could
help you find Kid Durango,
it would be him.
You need bigger bottles.
Oh!
(horse neighs)
You be darn careful
who you show that to.
Yes, sir.
Sheriff Epworth
wrote you this note.
"Don't go."
You thank him
for the advice.
You're a darn fool,
Billy Ray.
Yes, sir. I know.
Come on, Rojo.
Only God can kill
the devil, Billy Ray.
Forward.
Man:
He looks like
a real cowboy, don't he?
That's what
representing the town!
Bill Ray:
Giddy-up.
Woman:
Billy Ray,
you be careful out there!
(clucking)
That a--
Whoa! Whoa, settle down.
Settle down.
Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.
Whoa-a-a!
(gun fires)
(horse neighs)
Man:
Billy Ray
done shot his horse!
Man 2:
What?
Billy Ray:
My journey did not begin
on a good note.
I was nonetheless
determined to press on.
(steam whistle blowing)
After arranging an alternate
mode of transport,
I arrived in Millenium
three days later.
(clears throat)
Excuse me.
Could you tell me
where I could find
a Mr. JD Shones?
What do you want
with him, Sonny?
I just have
a very important question
I'd like to ask him.
You should've asked
him yesterday.
Conductor:
All aboard!
We are now committing
this man, Mr. Jones--
uh, Mr. Shones--
to his life in the hereafter.
And we would like
to take a moment
to acknowledge
his contributions
to our community.
During Mr. Shones'
short-lived term as sheriff,
he served the public
to the best of his abilities.
He shot eight men
and three women,
most of whom were engaged
in breaking the law.
I'm sure the others
were honest mistakes.
What happened?
Friend of yours?
Sort of.
Yeah. Same here.
Sort of.
(coughing)
You got business
with JD?
Yeah.
Well, I'm
the sheriff now.
Maybe I can be
of some assistance.
(gunshot echoes)
Preacher:
...amen.
Throw the dirt on him.
Let's get out of here.
Woman:
Oh my Lord. Give me
your hand. Come on.
You related to him?
No, sir.
(women chattering)
Woman:
I don't know.
Just come on, move along.
Jeremiah, come along
right now!
I want to watch!
There is nothing to watch!
I want to thank you
for distracting him for me.
What you lookin' at?
You just shot him
in the back.
His back was to me.
Come on, boy.
Help me out of this hole.
Come on! Help me out.
Besides,
he shot JD in the back.
Just seemed right.
He killed JD?
Yeah. Said he wanted
to be sheriff real bad.
Now he's sheriff,
real bad.
Rio here
don't like gunfire.
Hurts his ears.
Maybe you can tell me
where I can find a man
named Kid Durango.
What do you
want him for?
They say he's
the fastest gun
in the West.
Oh, yeah?
I want to hire him
for a job.
You got any money?
Maybe.
Well... hire me.
I ain't as fast
as I used to be,
but, uh...
I cheat real good.
Fast don't mean
a whole lot these days.
Us professional folks
are tired of fighting fair
and dying for it.
Do you know
Kid Durango?
Yeah. I know him.
Could you
take me to him?
Where are
you from, boy?
Originally, Boston,
Massachusetts.
Oh, that figures.
I'm getting on, Rio.
Well, maybe
you could just--
you could point me
in the right direction,
Mister, uh...
Mister, um...
Van Leek.
Thomas Van Leek.
Now look,
I'd like to stay here
and draw you a map,
but I think
I better keep moving
before somebody
starts asking some questions
about how the sheriff
got out of office.
I figure me and Rio
are gonna head for Mexico.
Well, Mexico--
you know, the man
I wish to apprehend
is in Mexico.
Well, mount up.
I wouldn't mind having you
tagging along for a while.
I don't have a horse.
(horse neighs)
Hey!
I'm sorry, Rio.
If you would be so kind
as to leave that saddle
where it is,
we'll be on our way.
Yes, sir!
Yes, sir!
Just a minute!
(neighing)
(grunting)
Oh, whoa! Oh! Whoa!
Ho, ho, whoa!
Ho!
Oh, oh, whoa!
(grunting)
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Whoa... Whoa, horse!
(grunting continues)
(distant coyote howling)
Billy Ray:
My contact in Millenium,
Mr. Shones,
had been shot
the previous day
by a Mr. Murphy,
who was in turn shot
while I was conversing
with him by a Mr. Van Leek.
Coincidentally,
Mr. Van Leek claimed
he was
a personal acquaintance
of Kid Durango.
And after helping
to arrange transportation
for me,
I am presently
accompanying him
on his journey
to Mexico.
I'm counting on him
providing me
with a formal introduction
to Kid Durango
when we reach
his hideout.
Uh...
How much was you
fixing to pay
this Kid Durango
for this job
you needed to be done?
Whatever the going rate--
the fair rate--
happens to be.
Well, you never did say
what it was
you needed to be done.
Hard to come up
with a price
if you don't know that.
I want to rescue
a young girl
who was kidnapped
by a man
presumed to be named
El Diablo.
And I want to bring him
and his compatriots
to justice.
What's the matter?
You can't ride.
You can't shoot.
You can't even think, boy.
You're in
the wrong territory.
Goddamn fool.
Come on, Rio!
(neighs)
Come on, boy.
Billy Ray:
Additional details
concerning my trip
seemed to discourage
Mr. Van Leek
from continuing the journey
together.
I was once again alone,
but nevertheless
still determined
to pursue my quest.
Whoa.
(hoof beats)
Hmm. Hmm.
(gunshots)
Hyah, hyah!
Let's get him!
Uh-oh. Giddy-up!
(gunshots)
Don't let him
get away!
I got him!
(gunshots)
Shoot him down!
Go!
Man:
Out of my way!
Ho, ho, ho!
Keep on him!
I can't see him!
Man:
Don't let him
out of your sight!
(gun fires)
(neighs)
Oh!
Man:
Where'd he go?
That way!
No, over there!
He's in the gully!
I don't see no gully!
It's right
in front of you!
That's an arroyo!
A what?
I'm sorry.
Man: This way, you jackass.
Let's go.
Hang on, you,
or get in front of me!
How could you
let him get away?
You couldn't hit water
if you fell out of a boat!
Why, he's over there!
(grunting)
Well, there he is!
Man:
Ha ha!
We got him now, boys!
(panting)
Spread out!
Man:
I told you
it was a gully.
Ha! Let me have
the first shot!
Look, he's going in
the shitter!
Awful big one!
It's got a window in it!
That's one of them
three-holers
I saw in a catalogue.
You can't read.
Come on,
let's get him!
Wait till
he gets out.
Hell, he might be
in there a week!
(laughs)
(gunshots)
(shooting stops)
You think
we got him?
Yeah. But go on over
and make sure.
You go. You're closer.
The hell I am.
Dick's closest.
I went first
last week.
Aw, horseshit!
I went first and got shot,
remember?
Oh, shut up.
Yeah, but it was only
in the head.
Well, it still hurt
and it affected my balance!
Man:
I said shut up.
Afternoon.
Jesus H Christ, Van Leek,
don't sneak up like that.
I wasn't sneaking.
What do you want?
Just passing through.
Got somebody
holed up in there?
We do. Snared up
like a rabbit.
Yeah. The boy
who shot the sheriff?
Yeah.
Is there a reward?
No, no.
We're just up here
because we want
to see justice done.
Oh.
How much?
Four-- uh...
$200, dead or alive.
That seem like
enough to go around.
Well, I ain't splittin' it
more than five ways.
In fact,
I was hoping that kid
would get lucky
and shoot
a couple of us.
So why don't you
just back off, Van Leek?
Well...
good luck.
This won't take
but a minute, Rio.
(hoof beats)
Man:
Hey, you guys
hear that?
Is that a horse?
Sure ain't no armadillo.
I hear it,
but I don't see nothing!
(gunshot)
Jake's down!
What?
I said, Jake's down!
Ah, Jesus!
Who is that?
(gunshots)
(men shouting)
Ah! I'll get him!
Hey!
Ah!
Pete's down!
Man:
Somebody shoot
that son of a bitch!
(shouting)
Hell, I'm gettin'
out of here! (grunting)
Man:
I could get him
if he'd hold still!
Ah!
Oh...
Oh!
(groans)
Van Leek:
Nice shot, kid!
Billy Ray:
Thank you.
(gunshot echoes)
(horse whinnies)
There's your new horse,
up there.
Mr. Van Leek?
I'd like to take you up
on your offer
to help me get
El Diablo.
I'll think about it.
Come on, Rio.
(owl hooting)
That was an impressive
display of gunmanship today.
Gunmanship?
I was wondering
if you might consider
teaching me a few tricks
of the trade.
(sighs)
They ain't tricks, boy.
They're real as death.
Here.
Don't point
that thing at me, boy.
I ain't no horse.
I'm sorry.
Pick a star.
What?
Lay down
on your back.
What for?
Shut your
goddamn hole, boy,
and lay down
on your back.
Now...
pick a star.
(horse neighs)
Got one.
Uh-huh.
That's Enif.
Enif?
Mm-hmm. The star
you're fixing on.
It's the brightest star
in Pegasus,
the constellation
of the winged horse.
That figures.
Now, don't-- don't drop
your look, boy.
You got to
concentrate.
Keep your eyes
fixed on the target,
real steady.
I got it.
Good.
Now you keep it there
till I tell you
to stop.
Yes, sir.
Good.
Ah-ah-ah! Don't you drop
your eyes from that target,
or you're a dead man.
Patience...
concentration...
the first two things
you got to learn.
Ah-ah-ah!
I got it.
(birds twittering)
(snoring)
(gunshot echoes)
(horse neighs, thuds)
You'd better start praying
that wasn't Rio.
(neighs)
(children laughing)
(baby crying)
(horse neighs)
Bebe.
You missed.
He missed?
I guess the balance
ain't quite right.
Where the hell
did you get that?
Right off
the son of bitch's boot.
You got it?
Uh-uh. This boy here got it.
A couple of weeks ago,
they stole his girl.
Actually, she was
one of my students.
Prettiest one
in the class, I'll bet.
(laughs)
I make it a policy
not to get involved
with my students.
(both snicker)
Think this
will this get us in?
Could be.
Old El Diablo
does favor his spurs.
Of course, getting in
is the easy part.
And if you don't take
the whole damn thing
in with you,
you just might get back
out again in one piece.
(laughs)
What the hell are
you looking at, boy?
Nothing.
Damn right.
There ain't nothin' there.
(laughs)
Billy Ray:
Although Mr. Van Leek
kept his intentions
pretty much to himself,
it appeared that the plan
was to assemble a group
of skilled professionals
to help me
in my endeavor.
The first person selected
was a Mr. Bebe Patterson,
who had been captured
by El Diablo's men
several years ago.
He managed to escape
with some useful information,
but returned home
minus a foot.
Billy Ray:
I'm not used
to riding horses.
(piano playing simple melody)
Shall we gather
at the river
Where bright angels' feet
have trod?
With its crystal tide
forever
Flowing from
the throne of God?
Yes, we'll gather
at the river
The beautiful,
the beautiful, the river
Gather with the saints
at the river
That flows
from the throne of God
Hear the word of the Lord,
oh, people of--
Bendix.
Bendix Rock!
For the Lord
has a controversy
with the inhabitants
of the land.
There is no faithfulness
of God in the land.
There is swearing
and lying...
All: Amen.
...killing, stealing,
and committing adultery!
Amen!
Amen.
Amen!
Nothing escapes the power
and the vision of the Lord.
Those who have sinned
will be punished.
Man:
Yes, Lord!
But we are here also
to forgive,
to ask the Lord
for mercy,
so that the souls
of Jonathan Napier
and Bob Zamudio...
Roberto.
...so that their souls
can be saved.
Praise God!
If you do not
take the Lord seriously,
then he will not
take you seriously.
Not only will the souls
of these poor unfortunates
be exiled for eternity
in hell,
but so will yours as well.
You must share with your Lord
the fruits of your labors.
Only then can He
truly become your savior!
Men:
Hang them!
Get on with it!
Now I want to see
this collection plate
passed around
once again.
And this time,
I want to see it
overflow with evidence
of your love
for the Lord!
Might I add
that If I'm disappointed,
there won't be any show...
No show?
...of justice
meted out today,
but rather these men
will be released
back into your fold
to continue robbing
and killing
and having their way
with your wives
and daughters,
with the sheeps
and goats and turkeys
of your flocks.
Turkeys?
May God bless you.
Bless you!
Bless you!
Man:
Come on, Preacher!
Man:
Get on with it!
Ah!
Bless you.
Bebe:
You recognize them?
One of them
is Bob Zamudio.
He's a pretty good hand
with explosives.
That one dangling,
I don't know.
We could use
some help.
(gunshot echoes)
All: Get down! Oh!
Man:
Don't move!
(gunshot echoes)
Woman: Oh!
Van Leek:
Afternoon, Atalicus.
Let us all join in
and sing the hymn,
"What a Friend
We Have in Jesus"
whilst the good Lord
determines the fate
of our, uh... brethren here.
What a friend
we have in Jesus
All:
All our sins
and griefs to bear!
What a privilege...
Equal shares all around.
We're going to need
your dead men there.
Everything to God
in prayer...
I think that can be arranged.
Billy Ray:
Today we went to church.
It was very different
from what I was used to.
I had the opportunity
to witness my first hanging.
In fact, the gentleman
who was hanged,
a Mr. Pitchfork Napier,
has elected
to join our outfit.
I'm looking forward
to discussing our plans
with my new companions.
Who in the hell
is this snot-nosed
little pantywaist?
(chuckling)
He's with me.
Hell, he's the one
that stole this.
Is this all
we got to go on?
His spurs are
like his fingers.
They're like his toes.
They're part of his body.
Hell, that was
his daddy's spurs,
and his daddy's daddy's.
"His daddy's spurs,
and his daddy's daddy's."
What a sorry bunch of
washed-up has-beens, eh?
Is muy valuable.
Those little red things
are real rubies, Bob.
Roberto.
(horse neighs)
El Diablo's treasure.
Indian gold,
European gold,
just waiting
there for us
to take it.
He's right about that.
I seen it with my own eyes.
El Diablo has something
worth a little more
than gold down there.
There's a little girl--
Hey, fuck your little girl.
Now just a second--
You don't want
to do that, boy.
Yes, he does.
Yes, he does.
(chuckling)
Come on, boy.
Come on!
Come on.
Come and get it, boy.
(chuckling)
(cocks gun)
(sizzling)
Now, we're going
to need dynamite
and someone to handle it.
How about it, Bobby?
I think I told you
once or twice, Atalicus,
that I do not answer
to that gringo name.
Look, seor Roberto,
we would very
much appreciate
you helping us
with your
special talents.
Well, uh,
dynamite is like a woman.
It takes the right hombre
to know how
to make her explode.
There's somebody
out there.
I don't hear nothing.
(sniffing)
Injuns.
Injuns? Ain't no damn
Injuns around here.
We're in Mexico, asshole.
The Ponkachonks, asshole.
I lived with them
for a year.
Don't never
rob no Indian.
I'd rob an Indian just...
the same as anybody.
Yeah? Did you sleep
with his wife too?
What was it like,
sleeping with an Indian woman?
Better than a nigger.
(grunting)
(coughing)
Van Leek:
Thank you, boy.
Now, generally,
I lets a man off
the first time
he say that to me--
that is, if he say
he's sorry.
How about you,
Mr. Napier?
You sorry?
(grunts)
I don't hear you,
Mr. Napier.
(choking)
I'm waiting.
(grunts)
Bye... nigger.
Uh...
(horse neighs)
(belches)
Oh...
(groans)
(chanting)
I think somebody
ought to try to talk to him.
Go on, Bob.
You "speakum" sign.
Roberto.
I don't think
Chief understand.
Man:
You're full of shit,
brown man.
And name not chief.
Name Dancing Bear.
(laughing)
(chanting)
Billy Ray:
We added a new member
to our group last night,
an Indian,
a Mr. Dancing Bear,
who had been tracking
Mr. Napier for some time.
Apparently,
Mr. Napier had bedded down
with his wife,
a transgression
which is not looked upon
favorably
by members
of his particular tribe.
I never liked him!
Once Dancing Bear
exacted his revenge,
he told us that El Diablo
had stolen gold
from his people
and turned many of them
into slaves.
Uno, dos, tres,
cuatro, cinco...
Billy Ray:
The next step was to locate
a box of dynamite
that Mr. Zamudio
had buried in the ground.
...11!
Once the spot was found,
I was volunteered
to dig it up.
Ya ya ya ya ya!
Qutate, qutate.
What?
Get out of
the hole.
You know,
this little cache here
has enabled Roberto and me
to open accounts
at over 22 of the best banks
in the Southwest.
Shh-shh-shh-shh!
Shh-shh-shh-shh!
You can get me
out of here now.
Not fast.
What's the matter?
It's decaying,
I think.
I told you we shouldn't
bury it here, Bob.
There's no shade.
Atalicus--
It's too hot, Bob.
Atalicus?
I don't think
now's the time
to make me angry, okay?
Ay ay ay ay ay ay.
-(speaking native language)
-Yeah.
(all laughing)
Roberto!
Come on!
Come on!
Bomba! Bomba!
That's not funny!
It's good, huh?
Whoo-hoo!
Billy Ray:
The dynamite was secured
to the buckboard
by Mr. Patterson
and Mr. Zamudio.
There still seemed to be
some question
as to its stability,
however.
We're a bit far apart.
Don't you think
that might not be too good
for their morale?
Feel free to join them, boy.
I'm sure they'd
welcome the company.
(bell tolling)
Billy Ray:
After riding hard
the entire day,
we finally
crossed into Mexico.
The buckboard
didn't explode,
and I took this
as a positive sign.
But I was very sore
and was glad
when we pulled
into a small village
for refreshments.
(patrons speaking Spanish)
Man:
Hey! Otra.
Dinero! Ms tequila!
(coughing)
Te gusta?
Es bonita.
Oh, no.
What do you want, boy?
Uh, lemon--
uh, whatever he's having.
Billy Ray:
The cantina we selected
would not have been
my first choice,
but it was
the only one in town.
It hosted
a different sort of clientele
than what I was used to
back East.
(clears throat)
Man: Ow!
(men laughing)
Man:
Thomas, is that you?
Bartender, put
their drinks on my bill.
Thomas, you devil,
please, come here. Join me!
(rattling)
Thomas Van Leek,
as I live and breathe?
So nice to see you.
Hello.
Hello.
Aren't you going
to introduce me
to your friend?
Mm-hmm. This here
is Billy Ray Smith.
Boy, this here
is Truman Feathers,
sometimes known
as Kid Durango.
Kid Durango?
Mm-hmm. Kid Durango.
K--Kid Durango?
Mm-hmm.
This boy's read every one
of your books, Truman.
Really?
Kid Durango.
Mm-hmm.
So...
what brings you
to this hole?
Well, actually,
I'm researching
our next adventure.
-Van Leek: Mm?
-Smoke signals indicated
that you were headed
in this direction.
(chuckles)
You know, I have a hat
just like that.
I... I
I love your outfit.
(snorts)
Where are you from?
Originally Boston,
Massachusetts.
Oh, really?
I've been to Rhode Island.
What did he mean
when he said,
"Our next adventure"?
Oh, well, it's a wonderful
arrangement, really.
You see, Thomas
runs around the West
risking his silly neck,
and I incorporate
his exploits
into my little true stories.
(typewriter dings)
You mean...
What he means is,
ain't nobody gonna buy
no stories
about no negro cowboys.
Well, well,
it's dramatic license,
really.
It's a necessary evil
in the literary world.
Dramatic license, hell!
A whole bunch of lies.
You made all that money,
and I never did see squat!
But what really gets me
is all that crap
about looking a man
right in the eye.
Hell, a man don't go
for a gun with his eye!
Gotta look at his hand!
I'll make a note of it.
Aah!
(man laughing)
(man shouting in Spanish)
Man 2:
He took my seorita.
Woman:
Locos.
Ms tequila!
They were with El Diablo
in the bank.
Shh.
The unattractive one
is Pestoso.
That other one
ain't no lady-killer.
Yes. That's Chak Mol.
Billy Ray: You know them?
Kid Durango:
Well, they come here
to unwind
after their forays
of raping and pillaging.
I've interviewed
both of them.
Pestoso is
surprisingly verbal.
Pestoso:
Ah! Ha ha!
(shouting in Spanish)
Hey, boy.
How do you feel about
being the fastest gun
in the West?
Huh?
(chuckling)
So you're the fastest gun
in the West, huh?
Do you know to whom
this belongs?
Where you get that,
gringo ? Huh?
Can you take me to him?
Take you to who?
"Take you to whom."
Qu importa, hombre?
El Diablo.
El Diablo? (laughing)
Where are you going,
gringo , huh?
Ow.
Adios, gringo.
(gunshots)
(grunts, groans)
Billy Ray:
I had successfully
shot a man in a showdown
in the middle of the street
at high noon.
Actually, it was
much later in the day,
but it was still
quite a thrill.
(chuckles)
Van Leek:
Good shot, boy.
Billy Ray:
I don't condone killing,
but this Pestoso
probably deserved it.
If he traveled
with El Diablo,
he had some
severe character flaws,
I was sure.
Good shot.
(blows)
(gasps)
(grunts)
You?
(grunts)
I meet you in the morning,
just outside of town.
The Tree of Death.
Come alone.
Tree of Death.
Ow!
S, s, Cecilia.
Tu nombre ser Cecilia.
Nombre de mi madre.
Never trust a man
who talks to his snake.
It's Truman.
Morning.
Van Leek:
What the hell you think
you're doing, Feathers?
Well, I've decided
to join your expedition.
Not with me, you ain't.
You won't
have to worry about me.
It's not you
I'm worried about.
I'm worried about us
with you out there.
Truman:
Oh, Thomas, please.
I'm sure I can perform
some very useful functions
on the trail.
And besides,
I'm an excellent cook.
Yeah?
Can you make coffee?
Well, as a matter of fact,
I brought along
some fresh Colombian beans.
And by the way, I make
a wonderful omelet.
Dancing Bear:
Hmm. What is omelet?
Well, omelet
is diced ham,
cheese, peppers,
folded into three eggs,
cooked in an iron skillet,
slightly oiled.
Mushrooms, snake meat,
squash good?
Good? Well, I wouldn't
recommend the squash,
but it's entirely
up to you.
For Christ's sake,
let's move out!
Come on!
Ho!
Billy Ray:
Even though I was still
somewhat puzzled
by the revelation
that Truman was Kid Durango,
or not Kid Durango,
I was excited
that he'd joined us.
It afforded me
the opportunity
to clear up
some of my confusion,
and I looked forward
to one of his omelets.
Now I still
don't understand
why you're coming
along with us.
Well, actually,
it's your example, Billy Ray.
You see, I've always written
about other people's exploits.
And, well, I'd like to think
that before I pass on,
I could include a few
adventures of my very own.
That was
such a wonderful moment
yesterday in the street
with you and Pestoso.
It was thrilling.
Virtually writes itself.
You're going to put me
in one of your books?
Of course.
Every story
needs its hero.
Hey, boy.
Let me see that spur.
Yes, sir.
Here, hold on
to that half, boy.
That's your calling card.
Well, go ahead on.
Be right behind you.
Go on.
Good luck,
Billy Ray.
Thank you.
Goodbye.
Excuse me.
Could you tell me precisely
why they call this
the Tree of Death?
Excuse me?
Billy Ray:
I met Chak Mol as arranged,
and I followed him
deeper into Mexico.
My nerves,
normally quite steady,
were acting up as I sensed us
getting closer and closer
to El Diablo.
I'm sure the tension
would have been eased
if Chak Mol had been
a better conversationalist.
Perhaps he was shy.
Thank you.
Shh!
Sorry.
Aah!
They're too spread out
for us to get all at once.
I think there might
just be a solution
to this problem
forthcoming.
Hombres!
Uno,
dos...
(gunfire)
...tres.
(grunts)
(growls)
We split up here.
That left tunnel lets you out
above the village.
You wait for my signal.
Good luck.
I, um, I think
a little prayer is in order
before we embark upon
this perilous ordeal.
Now if you will all
join me in reciting
"The Lord's Prayer."
Hyah!
"Our Father who--
"Our Father
who art in Heaven,
"Hallowed be thy name.
"Thy kingdom come.
Thy will be done
On Earth,
as it is in Heaven..."
This is very sorry war party
we have, brown man.
I did the best
I could, red man.
I'm here
to free my people.
Don't you get
in my way.
Wouldn't think of it.
Hyah!
Thomas,
I'd like to have
a word with you.
If it's short.
I find your behavior
in this endeavor questionable.
See, it's perfectly obvious
to me what you're doing.
You're using this boy
as a diversion,
so that you can steal
as much gold as you can carry.
Only Dancing Bear's
motivated by...
by honorable intentions.
As far as I'm concerned,
you're all a bunch
of mercenaries.
You finished?
Yes. I... I had to get it
off my chest.
Hope you feel better.
Come on, Rio!
(Rio neighs)
El Diablo won't touch that kid
without his spur.
Billy Ray:
When I arrived
at El Diablo's compound,
he was not
in the vicinity.
I decided to wait
and not be impatient.
I knew I was carrying an ace
in my pocket, so to speak.
(horse neighs)
So you are the boy
who killed Pestoso.
What is your name,
little boy?
William Raymond Smith.
Mister, uh...
Devil, is it?
And I understand,
Mr. William Raymond Smith,
you have brought
something for me.
Yes, sir.
This is my spur,
I believe.
That is correct.
There is
something missing.
That is also correct.
Where is the missing piece?
That's for me to know
and you to find out.
Oh?
I want to exchange it,
the missing piece that is,
for the girl.
And what girl is that?
Miss Nettie Tuleen.
You kidnapped her
in front of my school
about five weeks ago.
So many towns.
So many girls.
She's about 5'4",
blond hair,
blue eyes,
quite attractive,
and a very good student.
Does she look like...
this girl?
Yes, she does.
Uh, I don't recall
that outfit.
Yes.
She is quite
attractive.
Billy Ray:
I could not
believe my eyes.
This was not the Nettie
who was in my classroom
five weeks ago.
It was El Diablo's work,
I was sure.
And she is
a very good student.
Nettie!
I like my spurs
very much, Mr. Smith.
They belonged
to my father
and his father's
father's father.
I would like to have back
the missing piece
you have stolen.
Now, technically,
it wasn't stolen.
But, you see, Rosita--
Rosita?
My Rosita
means more to me
than a family bauble.
Huh.
There's the boy.
Uh-huh.
They're all over the place.
It seems your plan
has taken
an unexpected turn
for the worse, Thomas.
Aah!
Spare spurs.
Spoiled by spare spurs.
Try saying that
three times fast.
Spoiled by spare spurs.
Spoiled by spare spurs...
Shut up!
I'm sorry.
It's just I'm worried
about the boy.
Do you think
they'll hurt him?
I'm going to hurt you
if you don't shut up.
Kid Durango.
My people always
ride in the back.
All right, you can ride
in the front on the way home.
No, not the way home. Now!
It's your turn, Atalicus!
I'm not getting
in the back, not with
that Godforsaken pet--
Don't call her
Godforsaken.
Why you always say
"Godforsaken"?
Quiet! Quiet!
Whoa, whoa.
Hello, gentlemen.
I'll handle this.
These are my people.
Buenos das, amigos.
Cmo estamos?
Todo bien?
Nice pants.
These are not my people.
Damn it! I knew
we should've taken a right
at that last fork.
Should have turned right!
Throw down your weapons.
Come on, guys.
Settle down here, huh?
We got no quarrel with you.
We're just delivering
some supplies.
Yes,
Atalicus Collins' catering.
How do you do?
I would like to introduce you
to my assistants.
This is Bob and Bebe.
Roberto.
We have fine wines,
and delicacies, silken robes--
(gunshot)
What's in the bag?
It's nothing.
You can have anything
you want in the wagon,
but don't touch
the bag, okay?
I will decide
what I want.
Amigo,
I would rather die
than to give you
that bag.
Oh!
(horse neighing)
(laughing)
Any other requests?
Gringo, the bag!
Pronto!
(hissing)
Aah!
(snake rattling)
When my family came
to this country, Mr. Smith...
they encountered
incredible intelligence
and incredible savagery.
The Mayans built pyramids,
charted the heavens,
and gave us our calendar,
but the Aztecs brought
the art of human sacrifice
to a new height.
Aah!
(laughing)
(grunting)
(gunshots continuing)
Aw, Jesus!
Come on!
God! Come on!
Come on!
(grunting)
Oh, what the hell!
(laughing)
Yee-haw!
Yee-haw-haw-haw-haw!
El Diablo!
Company is coming,
you son of a bitch!
Ha-ha-ha-ha!
Yee-haw!
(grunts)
Man:
Cuidado!
Aah!
(women screaming)
(gunshot)
(grunts)
Whole lot different
than writing about it,
huh, Truman?
He took Nettie.
We have to catch him.
Mm-hmm.
(laughing)
Good old Bebe.
So that's
why you're here,
for the gold?
That's more important to you
than saving the girl?
Listen, boy,
that girl ain't my problem.
Billy Ray: I found a piece
of the outfit Nettie
was wearing
next to the cave.
(sneezes)
It confirmed my suspicions
that El Diablo had forced her
to escape with him.
Nettie?
Nettie!
Hello, little boy.
Looking for something?
I want the girl.
And how are you going
to get her back,
with your little stick?
(laughing)
Give up the girl,
Diablo.
Now, who is this,
little boy?
My name...
is Kid Durango.
(El Diablo laughing)
Oh. Kid Durango.
Am I to be frightened
by this name?
(whispering)
Truman, you don't
have to do this.
Yes, I do.
Truman.
Since you are the guest,
Mr. Kid Durango,
I will wait for you
to make the first move.
(coughing)
Truman-- Truman, you didn't
have to do that.
I did. I did.
I did.
Ow! It hurts.
Oh. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
Ow. (panting)
I never thought
about the pain.
I assumed it would
be over quickly.
Perhaps I should have
looked at his hands,
not his eyes.
You know,
you're ruining
a perfectly good scarf.
I'm sorry.
(coughing)
I want you... I want you
to do something for me.
Anything. Anything.
I'll do anything.
Kill him.
Kill El Diablo.
Complete the story,
Billy Ray.
Truman, Truman,
you're not going to die.
I know.
I have never felt so alive.
In whose arms
are you going to die,
little boy?
He didn't even
go for his gun.
I was getting bored.
I am a busy man.
Now, where would you
like me to shoot you?
I will give you
the choice.
Where?
En la cabeza?
El corazn?
Uh...
El...
(laughing)
...estmago?
I would not
recommend the stomach.
It is very painful
and takes a long time to die.
But make your decision
quickly, please.
You have seen,
I am an impatient man.
How about you just wing me
on the shoulder,
right about here?
You are very funny,
little boy.
Ha.
I think maybe...
la cabeza.
Van Leek:
Diablo!
Finally, someone who is
worthy of the challenge.
Cut the bullshit,
El Diablo.
Make your move.
You want a chaw?
You want to try again?
(gunshot)
(gunshot)
Damn, boy.
You shot him in the back.
Well, his back was to me.
(laughs)
I forgot.
Billy Ray:
I shot El Diablo.
It may not have been
a showdown
in the middle of the street
at high noon,
but it happened.
Mr. Van Leek was there
to document the event.
He seemed to approve
of my tactics.
You done good, boy!
We buried the preacher,
Roberto, Bebe, and Truman
in the high plains.
Dancing Bear
picked out the spot,
saying that
the ground was rich
in his ancestors' blood
and would nourish
our compatriots' souls.
I don't have much left
to say
except I don't plan
to join you no time soon.
It was with great sadness
as I knelt to Truman's grave.
He had saved my life,
and there was no way
I would ever be able
to pay him back.
He had proven to be, perhaps,
the bravest of us all.
I regret that I would never
be able to really know him.
Man:
Coffee, flour...
(indistinct chattering)
Who's that?
It looks like
Billy Ray!
Woman:
Oh, my God!
Is that
Nettie Tuleen?
Man:
Who's with him?
Isn't that Billy Ray?
Sure looks different.
Yeah. Used to wear
a hat, didn't he?
Oh!
Girl:
That's Nettie Tuleen!
She's come back.
Man:
Didn't think
we'd see that boy again.
Whoa.
Thank you.
Coming back, Billy Ray?
Someday.
Did you kill El Diablo,
Billy Ray?
Only God can kill
the devil, Charlie.
That's right, Billy Ray.
That's right.
(laughing)
Billy Ray:
When I told Mr. Van Leek
that I was going to write
an account of our adventure,
his ears pricked up.
Suddenly, he was a fountain
of information.
Or should I say fabrication?
He really got rolling
when I mentioned
that I intended to pen
a whole series of books.
Hey, I don't want you
to be writing about
no white boy
with a fancy hat
and shirt.
I want to hear about
the way it really is--
how you square off
with another man,
you look him right
in the--
Right in the back?
Right. You look another man
right in the back
and you shoot him
before he knows--
before he knows
what hit him.
(laughs)
(both laughing)
(dog barking)
(chicken clucking)
(dog whimpers)
(distant horse neighing)
(noisy chattering)
Oops! Sorry. I'm sorry.
(clucking)
Good morning, Sheriff Epworth.
Good morning, Billy Ray.
I'll bet you ain't never
seen a day as pretty
as this back East in...
Boston.
Actually, Boston can be
quite beautiful, Sheriff.
Ho, ho, ho!
Ho, ho, ho!
Oh, Nettie!
I'm sorry, Mama.
Billy Ray is here.
I never
would have known.
Nettie, no more Billy Ray.
It's Mr. Smith, okay?
(knock on door)
Okay.
Morning, Billy Ray.
(sighs)
Billy Ray:
Nettie.
Morning, Mrs. Tuleen.
Oh, Nettie.
Nettie, you need
to be careful.
I'll get them.
I'll get them.
You have to take care
of these books,
you know?
Do you ever think
about me, Billy Ray?
Of course I do.
I usually wonder
whether you're doing
your homework or not.
No. I mean,
do you ever think of me
as a... as a woman?
Someday, Nettie,
you're going to be
a very beautiful woman.
In other words,
you don't.
Nettie, let me
tell you something.
When you're a little girl,
all you want is to become
a woman.
But when you're
a grown woman,
you realize
how important it is
to be a little girl.
Now, it's different
for a man.
I mean, when he's a boy,
he's expected to behave
and mind his folks.
But when
he becomes a man,
I mean,
he has to stand tall,
speak the truth,
make an honest
day's living,
and be able
to look any other man
straight in the eye
without flinching.
Man:
Good morning,
Billy Ray!
Good morning, Charlie.
Beautiful morning
for procreation.
"Be fruitful and multiply,"
sayeth the Lord.
(Charlie laughs)
Billy Ray!
Seven minus three
equals...
Now, think about this
for a minute, Lon.
Let's say
you had seven chickens,
and your neighbor came over
and took away three of them.
How many
would you have left?
Well, I think I'd have seven
'cause my daddy'd shoot him
before he got out
the henhouse.
(students laugh)
I think that's enough
arithmetic for today, Lon.
Why don't you sit down?
(students snickering)
We're starting a new
"Kid Durango" book today.
(students cheer)
This is one
my personal favorites.
Is there a girl
in this one, Billy--
I mean, Mr. Smith?
Yes, there is, Nettie.
Boys:
Aw!
I think there's something
in here for everyone.
If you prefer, we could
go back to the arithmetic.
All:
No!
"Kid Durango of Arizona:
the Dust Devils."
"The layer of dew
that covered the prairie
"disappeared quickly
"as the sun rose
over the foothills.
"The moon hung around
for a while
"and then sunk
far below the ranges.
"The day began like
a thousand other Arizona days.
"That was...
"until the cloud came.
"It began on the horizon--"
"shadows of dust
moving at great speed..."
"and then the pounding hooves
on the hard ground."
"As the whirlwind
got closer,
"you could see
into the dust--
"the shapes of horses
and then the riders,
"riders with guns
on both hips
"and bandoliers
across their chests."
"They rode hard."
"They rode with a purpose."
"As they approached
the town,"
"they reined back
on their horses."
(horse neighs)
Man: They're coming!
"The dust around them settled,
"and you could see
their faces,
"faces weathered
by the Mexican sun,
faces marked by violence."
(horse neighing)
(chuckles)
"When the citizens
of the town saw the riders,
"they instinctively withdrew
"into the shadows
of the boardwalk.
"Many of the merchants
"went inside their shops
and locked their doors.
"Shades came down,
closed signs appeared
as the town prepared
to look the other way."
(voices murmuring)
"It was pretty clear
why they were there.
"They had an appointment
at the bank,
and it wasn't
to make a deposit."
(laughs)
(man laughing)
(man chuckling)
"They were a ruthless band
of thieves and killers
with no regard
for human life."
"It was as if they were
put on this earth by the devil
"to torment decent,
God-fearing folks
who worked hard
to make an honest living."
(gunshot echoes)
That was a gunshot.
(students murmuring)
It's just like
in the story, Billy Ray.
(students chattering)
What?
They got guns!
They're coming
this way!
Everybody, stay in your seats!
Stay in your seats!
Stay in your seats!
Get back!
Lon, get out of the way.
Wait. No...
Get out of the way now.
No, no, no!
Stay-- stay in here! Stay!
Net-- Nettie, move! Move.
This is real, Nettie!
Nettie!
Vengase, seorita!
Billy Ray:
Nettie!
Hyah! Hyah! Hyah!
Let me go!
Mister, please,
put her down. Uh...
Let me go! Billy?
Seor?
Billy!
Please, seor-- seoro?
Uh, hola?
(laughing)
Seor?
Please! Billy Ray?
(muttering)
Nettie! Drop...
Gringo!
Uh... wait.
Wait! Nettie! Nettie!
Billy Ray!
Billy! Help me!
(grunting)
Muy macho, gringo!
(laughing)
(grunting)
Billy!
(man laughing)
Who in the hell was that?
They shot Harold
and Mr. West.
Where the hell is
the sheriff?
Sleeping, probably.
Well, somebody go wake him up.
Tell him to round up a posse.
Robbed the bank!
Woman: They took
the Tuleen girl!
Woman 2:
Oh my gosh!
Man:
Hey, hey, mount up!
All right, I'm with you!
Somebody go get Jake!
Man:
I think they rode
south, boys!
Come on, men! Let's go.
Billy Ray?
Billy Ray,
you all right?
You're looking
kind of peaked.
Somebody better
go get the doc.
Mother:
They have my Nettie!
(men chattering)
Man:
No, I haven't heard anything.
Is my daughter there?
Can anyone see
my Nettie there?
Billy Ray, can you see?
My eyes aren't what
they used to be.
Man:
Yeah. Horses.
Man 2:
Look at that.
They're back.
Man 3:
Looks like
just one rider, huh?
I don't think
there's anybody
on them horses.
I see the sheriff.
Man: Naw!
I swear that's him.
Is that the sheriff?
Yeah, that's him.
Where are the others?
Man:
Where'd they all go?
The sheriff,
he don't look so good.
Somebody get the doc!
Man:
That's Jethro's horse.
Where the hell's Jethro?
There's blood
on the saddle.
What the hell
happened, Sheriff?
Oh, Lordy.
They've cut out his tongue!
(grunting)
(sighs)
Ex-- excuse me, Deputy.
Did you say that
they cut out his tongue?
Man:
Hey! Here it is,
right here!
(body thuds)
Man:
Now even if we could
get a posse together,
we wouldn't know
where to find him.
US government
and the Federales
been searching
for him for years.
I'll tell you something
about this El Diablo.
They did find him once.
Caught him down in Amos,
a little border town
north of Laredo.
Caught him,
tried him, and hanged him
all in the same night,
but he wouldn't die.
He just hanged there
by his neck,
spitting at the crowd
like they disgusted him.
Cussed 'em out so bad,
the womenfolk had to go home.
I was there
when they cut him down.
And I thanked the Lord
I left when I did.
'Cause three days later--
so the story goes--
El Diablo returned to Amos
with his men
and cut out the heart
of every man, woman, and child
in the whole blessed town
and just left 'em there
to bleach in the sun.
(crying)
Pretty soon,
they started to rot.
And then
the buzzards come
and started
pecking out what's left
of their eyeballs--
Now, Spivey,
that's enough of that!
Devil don't never die!
No, sir!
So no one
is going to do anything
about getting my Nettie back!
Probably already
cut out her heart
and eaten it!
Oh my God!
I didn't say nothing
about eating their hearts.
He just cut them out
and left.
Spivey!
Well, I'm sorry, Deputy.
Or are you
the sheriff now?
'Cause if you are,
then it's your responsibility
to go after El Diablo.
(crowd agreeing)
Man:
What are you going to do
about it, Sheriff?
Well, in the last report,
the doc said that
the sheriff's feeling
much better.
(clucking)
And I suppose
he's been working
on his sign language too.
(all laughing)
Spivey's right.
You're the new sheriff.
We pay your wage.
Man: That's right.
I intend
to bring Nettie back.
Man:
That's Billy Ray!
(all chattering)
How you planning
on doing that, boy?
I said, I intend
to bring back Nettie.
You and who else,
schoolteacher?
He can't get
El Diablo with a book!
Well... me and Kid Durango,
that's who.
(men laughing)
I mean,
Kid Durango and I.
Hey, Charlie,
you got competition.
Man:
Can't even shoot a gun!
Billy Ray!
Oh, I intend to learn
to shoot a gun.
El Diablo is sure
gonna drop a load of manure
in his pants
when he sees you
a'coming at him.
(laughs)
Well, I do know one man.
My second cousin,
Maggie Sue's brother-in-law,
JD Shones.
Yeah?
He's some kind
of lawman now.
Texas Ranger.
He's supposed to have rode
with Kid Durango.
Tell you the truth,
we never had
all that much
to do with him.
He's sort of the disgrace
of the family, you know?
He shot and killed
my cousin Deke
about eight years ago
up in Sonoma.
He also shot and killed
my daddy's brother Edward.
Where is he now?
Well, last time I heard,
he was up in Millennium.
Some kind of marshal
or ranger up there.
Hell, ain't but
a turd's difference
between old JD
and the scum he hauls in.
But if anybody could
help you find Kid Durango,
it would be him.
You need bigger bottles.
Oh!
(horse neighs)
You be darn careful
who you show that to.
Yes, sir.
Sheriff Epworth
wrote you this note.
"Don't go."
You thank him
for the advice.
You're a darn fool,
Billy Ray.
Yes, sir. I know.
Come on, Rojo.
Only God can kill
the devil, Billy Ray.
Forward.
Man:
He looks like
a real cowboy, don't he?
That's what
representing the town!
Bill Ray:
Giddy-up.
Woman:
Billy Ray,
you be careful out there!
(clucking)
That a--
Whoa! Whoa, settle down.
Settle down.
Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.
Whoa-a-a!
(gun fires)
(horse neighs)
Man:
Billy Ray
done shot his horse!
Man 2:
What?
Billy Ray:
My journey did not begin
on a good note.
I was nonetheless
determined to press on.
(steam whistle blowing)
After arranging an alternate
mode of transport,
I arrived in Millenium
three days later.
(clears throat)
Excuse me.
Could you tell me
where I could find
a Mr. JD Shones?
What do you want
with him, Sonny?
I just have
a very important question
I'd like to ask him.
You should've asked
him yesterday.
Conductor:
All aboard!
We are now committing
this man, Mr. Jones--
uh, Mr. Shones--
to his life in the hereafter.
And we would like
to take a moment
to acknowledge
his contributions
to our community.
During Mr. Shones'
short-lived term as sheriff,
he served the public
to the best of his abilities.
He shot eight men
and three women,
most of whom were engaged
in breaking the law.
I'm sure the others
were honest mistakes.
What happened?
Friend of yours?
Sort of.
Yeah. Same here.
Sort of.
(coughing)
You got business
with JD?
Yeah.
Well, I'm
the sheriff now.
Maybe I can be
of some assistance.
(gunshot echoes)
Preacher:
...amen.
Throw the dirt on him.
Let's get out of here.
Woman:
Oh my Lord. Give me
your hand. Come on.
You related to him?
No, sir.
(women chattering)
Woman:
I don't know.
Just come on, move along.
Jeremiah, come along
right now!
I want to watch!
There is nothing to watch!
I want to thank you
for distracting him for me.
What you lookin' at?
You just shot him
in the back.
His back was to me.
Come on, boy.
Help me out of this hole.
Come on! Help me out.
Besides,
he shot JD in the back.
Just seemed right.
He killed JD?
Yeah. Said he wanted
to be sheriff real bad.
Now he's sheriff,
real bad.
Rio here
don't like gunfire.
Hurts his ears.
Maybe you can tell me
where I can find a man
named Kid Durango.
What do you
want him for?
They say he's
the fastest gun
in the West.
Oh, yeah?
I want to hire him
for a job.
You got any money?
Maybe.
Well... hire me.
I ain't as fast
as I used to be,
but, uh...
I cheat real good.
Fast don't mean
a whole lot these days.
Us professional folks
are tired of fighting fair
and dying for it.
Do you know
Kid Durango?
Yeah. I know him.
Could you
take me to him?
Where are
you from, boy?
Originally, Boston,
Massachusetts.
Oh, that figures.
I'm getting on, Rio.
Well, maybe
you could just--
you could point me
in the right direction,
Mister, uh...
Mister, um...
Van Leek.
Thomas Van Leek.
Now look,
I'd like to stay here
and draw you a map,
but I think
I better keep moving
before somebody
starts asking some questions
about how the sheriff
got out of office.
I figure me and Rio
are gonna head for Mexico.
Well, Mexico--
you know, the man
I wish to apprehend
is in Mexico.
Well, mount up.
I wouldn't mind having you
tagging along for a while.
I don't have a horse.
(horse neighs)
Hey!
I'm sorry, Rio.
If you would be so kind
as to leave that saddle
where it is,
we'll be on our way.
Yes, sir!
Yes, sir!
Just a minute!
(neighing)
(grunting)
Oh, whoa! Oh! Whoa!
Ho, ho, whoa!
Ho!
Oh, oh, whoa!
(grunting)
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Whoa... Whoa, horse!
(grunting continues)
(distant coyote howling)
Billy Ray:
My contact in Millenium,
Mr. Shones,
had been shot
the previous day
by a Mr. Murphy,
who was in turn shot
while I was conversing
with him by a Mr. Van Leek.
Coincidentally,
Mr. Van Leek claimed
he was
a personal acquaintance
of Kid Durango.
And after helping
to arrange transportation
for me,
I am presently
accompanying him
on his journey
to Mexico.
I'm counting on him
providing me
with a formal introduction
to Kid Durango
when we reach
his hideout.
Uh...
How much was you
fixing to pay
this Kid Durango
for this job
you needed to be done?
Whatever the going rate--
the fair rate--
happens to be.
Well, you never did say
what it was
you needed to be done.
Hard to come up
with a price
if you don't know that.
I want to rescue
a young girl
who was kidnapped
by a man
presumed to be named
El Diablo.
And I want to bring him
and his compatriots
to justice.
What's the matter?
You can't ride.
You can't shoot.
You can't even think, boy.
You're in
the wrong territory.
Goddamn fool.
Come on, Rio!
(neighs)
Come on, boy.
Billy Ray:
Additional details
concerning my trip
seemed to discourage
Mr. Van Leek
from continuing the journey
together.
I was once again alone,
but nevertheless
still determined
to pursue my quest.
Whoa.
(hoof beats)
Hmm. Hmm.
(gunshots)
Hyah, hyah!
Let's get him!
Uh-oh. Giddy-up!
(gunshots)
Don't let him
get away!
I got him!
(gunshots)
Shoot him down!
Go!
Man:
Out of my way!
Ho, ho, ho!
Keep on him!
I can't see him!
Man:
Don't let him
out of your sight!
(gun fires)
(neighs)
Oh!
Man:
Where'd he go?
That way!
No, over there!
He's in the gully!
I don't see no gully!
It's right
in front of you!
That's an arroyo!
A what?
I'm sorry.
Man: This way, you jackass.
Let's go.
Hang on, you,
or get in front of me!
How could you
let him get away?
You couldn't hit water
if you fell out of a boat!
Why, he's over there!
(grunting)
Well, there he is!
Man:
Ha ha!
We got him now, boys!
(panting)
Spread out!
Man:
I told you
it was a gully.
Ha! Let me have
the first shot!
Look, he's going in
the shitter!
Awful big one!
It's got a window in it!
That's one of them
three-holers
I saw in a catalogue.
You can't read.
Come on,
let's get him!
Wait till
he gets out.
Hell, he might be
in there a week!
(laughs)
(gunshots)
(shooting stops)
You think
we got him?
Yeah. But go on over
and make sure.
You go. You're closer.
The hell I am.
Dick's closest.
I went first
last week.
Aw, horseshit!
I went first and got shot,
remember?
Oh, shut up.
Yeah, but it was only
in the head.
Well, it still hurt
and it affected my balance!
Man:
I said shut up.
Afternoon.
Jesus H Christ, Van Leek,
don't sneak up like that.
I wasn't sneaking.
What do you want?
Just passing through.
Got somebody
holed up in there?
We do. Snared up
like a rabbit.
Yeah. The boy
who shot the sheriff?
Yeah.
Is there a reward?
No, no.
We're just up here
because we want
to see justice done.
Oh.
How much?
Four-- uh...
$200, dead or alive.
That seem like
enough to go around.
Well, I ain't splittin' it
more than five ways.
In fact,
I was hoping that kid
would get lucky
and shoot
a couple of us.
So why don't you
just back off, Van Leek?
Well...
good luck.
This won't take
but a minute, Rio.
(hoof beats)
Man:
Hey, you guys
hear that?
Is that a horse?
Sure ain't no armadillo.
I hear it,
but I don't see nothing!
(gunshot)
Jake's down!
What?
I said, Jake's down!
Ah, Jesus!
Who is that?
(gunshots)
(men shouting)
Ah! I'll get him!
Hey!
Ah!
Pete's down!
Man:
Somebody shoot
that son of a bitch!
(shouting)
Hell, I'm gettin'
out of here! (grunting)
Man:
I could get him
if he'd hold still!
Ah!
Oh...
Oh!
(groans)
Van Leek:
Nice shot, kid!
Billy Ray:
Thank you.
(gunshot echoes)
(horse whinnies)
There's your new horse,
up there.
Mr. Van Leek?
I'd like to take you up
on your offer
to help me get
El Diablo.
I'll think about it.
Come on, Rio.
(owl hooting)
That was an impressive
display of gunmanship today.
Gunmanship?
I was wondering
if you might consider
teaching me a few tricks
of the trade.
(sighs)
They ain't tricks, boy.
They're real as death.
Here.
Don't point
that thing at me, boy.
I ain't no horse.
I'm sorry.
Pick a star.
What?
Lay down
on your back.
What for?
Shut your
goddamn hole, boy,
and lay down
on your back.
Now...
pick a star.
(horse neighs)
Got one.
Uh-huh.
That's Enif.
Enif?
Mm-hmm. The star
you're fixing on.
It's the brightest star
in Pegasus,
the constellation
of the winged horse.
That figures.
Now, don't-- don't drop
your look, boy.
You got to
concentrate.
Keep your eyes
fixed on the target,
real steady.
I got it.
Good.
Now you keep it there
till I tell you
to stop.
Yes, sir.
Good.
Ah-ah-ah! Don't you drop
your eyes from that target,
or you're a dead man.
Patience...
concentration...
the first two things
you got to learn.
Ah-ah-ah!
I got it.
(birds twittering)
(snoring)
(gunshot echoes)
(horse neighs, thuds)
You'd better start praying
that wasn't Rio.
(neighs)
(children laughing)
(baby crying)
(horse neighs)
Bebe.
You missed.
He missed?
I guess the balance
ain't quite right.
Where the hell
did you get that?
Right off
the son of bitch's boot.
You got it?
Uh-uh. This boy here got it.
A couple of weeks ago,
they stole his girl.
Actually, she was
one of my students.
Prettiest one
in the class, I'll bet.
(laughs)
I make it a policy
not to get involved
with my students.
(both snicker)
Think this
will this get us in?
Could be.
Old El Diablo
does favor his spurs.
Of course, getting in
is the easy part.
And if you don't take
the whole damn thing
in with you,
you just might get back
out again in one piece.
(laughs)
What the hell are
you looking at, boy?
Nothing.
Damn right.
There ain't nothin' there.
(laughs)
Billy Ray:
Although Mr. Van Leek
kept his intentions
pretty much to himself,
it appeared that the plan
was to assemble a group
of skilled professionals
to help me
in my endeavor.
The first person selected
was a Mr. Bebe Patterson,
who had been captured
by El Diablo's men
several years ago.
He managed to escape
with some useful information,
but returned home
minus a foot.
Billy Ray:
I'm not used
to riding horses.
(piano playing simple melody)
Shall we gather
at the river
Where bright angels' feet
have trod?
With its crystal tide
forever
Flowing from
the throne of God?
Yes, we'll gather
at the river
The beautiful,
the beautiful, the river
Gather with the saints
at the river
That flows
from the throne of God
Hear the word of the Lord,
oh, people of--
Bendix.
Bendix Rock!
For the Lord
has a controversy
with the inhabitants
of the land.
There is no faithfulness
of God in the land.
There is swearing
and lying...
All: Amen.
...killing, stealing,
and committing adultery!
Amen!
Amen.
Amen!
Nothing escapes the power
and the vision of the Lord.
Those who have sinned
will be punished.
Man:
Yes, Lord!
But we are here also
to forgive,
to ask the Lord
for mercy,
so that the souls
of Jonathan Napier
and Bob Zamudio...
Roberto.
...so that their souls
can be saved.
Praise God!
If you do not
take the Lord seriously,
then he will not
take you seriously.
Not only will the souls
of these poor unfortunates
be exiled for eternity
in hell,
but so will yours as well.
You must share with your Lord
the fruits of your labors.
Only then can He
truly become your savior!
Men:
Hang them!
Get on with it!
Now I want to see
this collection plate
passed around
once again.
And this time,
I want to see it
overflow with evidence
of your love
for the Lord!
Might I add
that If I'm disappointed,
there won't be any show...
No show?
...of justice
meted out today,
but rather these men
will be released
back into your fold
to continue robbing
and killing
and having their way
with your wives
and daughters,
with the sheeps
and goats and turkeys
of your flocks.
Turkeys?
May God bless you.
Bless you!
Bless you!
Man:
Come on, Preacher!
Man:
Get on with it!
Ah!
Bless you.
Bebe:
You recognize them?
One of them
is Bob Zamudio.
He's a pretty good hand
with explosives.
That one dangling,
I don't know.
We could use
some help.
(gunshot echoes)
All: Get down! Oh!
Man:
Don't move!
(gunshot echoes)
Woman: Oh!
Van Leek:
Afternoon, Atalicus.
Let us all join in
and sing the hymn,
"What a Friend
We Have in Jesus"
whilst the good Lord
determines the fate
of our, uh... brethren here.
What a friend
we have in Jesus
All:
All our sins
and griefs to bear!
What a privilege...
Equal shares all around.
We're going to need
your dead men there.
Everything to God
in prayer...
I think that can be arranged.
Billy Ray:
Today we went to church.
It was very different
from what I was used to.
I had the opportunity
to witness my first hanging.
In fact, the gentleman
who was hanged,
a Mr. Pitchfork Napier,
has elected
to join our outfit.
I'm looking forward
to discussing our plans
with my new companions.
Who in the hell
is this snot-nosed
little pantywaist?
(chuckling)
He's with me.
Hell, he's the one
that stole this.
Is this all
we got to go on?
His spurs are
like his fingers.
They're like his toes.
They're part of his body.
Hell, that was
his daddy's spurs,
and his daddy's daddy's.
"His daddy's spurs,
and his daddy's daddy's."
What a sorry bunch of
washed-up has-beens, eh?
Is muy valuable.
Those little red things
are real rubies, Bob.
Roberto.
(horse neighs)
El Diablo's treasure.
Indian gold,
European gold,
just waiting
there for us
to take it.
He's right about that.
I seen it with my own eyes.
El Diablo has something
worth a little more
than gold down there.
There's a little girl--
Hey, fuck your little girl.
Now just a second--
You don't want
to do that, boy.
Yes, he does.
Yes, he does.
(chuckling)
Come on, boy.
Come on!
Come on.
Come and get it, boy.
(chuckling)
(cocks gun)
(sizzling)
Now, we're going
to need dynamite
and someone to handle it.
How about it, Bobby?
I think I told you
once or twice, Atalicus,
that I do not answer
to that gringo name.
Look, seor Roberto,
we would very
much appreciate
you helping us
with your
special talents.
Well, uh,
dynamite is like a woman.
It takes the right hombre
to know how
to make her explode.
There's somebody
out there.
I don't hear nothing.
(sniffing)
Injuns.
Injuns? Ain't no damn
Injuns around here.
We're in Mexico, asshole.
The Ponkachonks, asshole.
I lived with them
for a year.
Don't never
rob no Indian.
I'd rob an Indian just...
the same as anybody.
Yeah? Did you sleep
with his wife too?
What was it like,
sleeping with an Indian woman?
Better than a nigger.
(grunting)
(coughing)
Van Leek:
Thank you, boy.
Now, generally,
I lets a man off
the first time
he say that to me--
that is, if he say
he's sorry.
How about you,
Mr. Napier?
You sorry?
(grunts)
I don't hear you,
Mr. Napier.
(choking)
I'm waiting.
(grunts)
Bye... nigger.
Uh...
(horse neighs)
(belches)
Oh...
(groans)
(chanting)
I think somebody
ought to try to talk to him.
Go on, Bob.
You "speakum" sign.
Roberto.
I don't think
Chief understand.
Man:
You're full of shit,
brown man.
And name not chief.
Name Dancing Bear.
(laughing)
(chanting)
Billy Ray:
We added a new member
to our group last night,
an Indian,
a Mr. Dancing Bear,
who had been tracking
Mr. Napier for some time.
Apparently,
Mr. Napier had bedded down
with his wife,
a transgression
which is not looked upon
favorably
by members
of his particular tribe.
I never liked him!
Once Dancing Bear
exacted his revenge,
he told us that El Diablo
had stolen gold
from his people
and turned many of them
into slaves.
Uno, dos, tres,
cuatro, cinco...
Billy Ray:
The next step was to locate
a box of dynamite
that Mr. Zamudio
had buried in the ground.
...11!
Once the spot was found,
I was volunteered
to dig it up.
Ya ya ya ya ya!
Qutate, qutate.
What?
Get out of
the hole.
You know,
this little cache here
has enabled Roberto and me
to open accounts
at over 22 of the best banks
in the Southwest.
Shh-shh-shh-shh!
Shh-shh-shh-shh!
You can get me
out of here now.
Not fast.
What's the matter?
It's decaying,
I think.
I told you we shouldn't
bury it here, Bob.
There's no shade.
Atalicus--
It's too hot, Bob.
Atalicus?
I don't think
now's the time
to make me angry, okay?
Ay ay ay ay ay ay.
-(speaking native language)
-Yeah.
(all laughing)
Roberto!
Come on!
Come on!
Bomba! Bomba!
That's not funny!
It's good, huh?
Whoo-hoo!
Billy Ray:
The dynamite was secured
to the buckboard
by Mr. Patterson
and Mr. Zamudio.
There still seemed to be
some question
as to its stability,
however.
We're a bit far apart.
Don't you think
that might not be too good
for their morale?
Feel free to join them, boy.
I'm sure they'd
welcome the company.
(bell tolling)
Billy Ray:
After riding hard
the entire day,
we finally
crossed into Mexico.
The buckboard
didn't explode,
and I took this
as a positive sign.
But I was very sore
and was glad
when we pulled
into a small village
for refreshments.
(patrons speaking Spanish)
Man:
Hey! Otra.
Dinero! Ms tequila!
(coughing)
Te gusta?
Es bonita.
Oh, no.
What do you want, boy?
Uh, lemon--
uh, whatever he's having.
Billy Ray:
The cantina we selected
would not have been
my first choice,
but it was
the only one in town.
It hosted
a different sort of clientele
than what I was used to
back East.
(clears throat)
Man: Ow!
(men laughing)
Man:
Thomas, is that you?
Bartender, put
their drinks on my bill.
Thomas, you devil,
please, come here. Join me!
(rattling)
Thomas Van Leek,
as I live and breathe?
So nice to see you.
Hello.
Hello.
Aren't you going
to introduce me
to your friend?
Mm-hmm. This here
is Billy Ray Smith.
Boy, this here
is Truman Feathers,
sometimes known
as Kid Durango.
Kid Durango?
Mm-hmm. Kid Durango.
K--Kid Durango?
Mm-hmm.
This boy's read every one
of your books, Truman.
Really?
Kid Durango.
Mm-hmm.
So...
what brings you
to this hole?
Well, actually,
I'm researching
our next adventure.
-Van Leek: Mm?
-Smoke signals indicated
that you were headed
in this direction.
(chuckles)
You know, I have a hat
just like that.
I... I
I love your outfit.
(snorts)
Where are you from?
Originally Boston,
Massachusetts.
Oh, really?
I've been to Rhode Island.
What did he mean
when he said,
"Our next adventure"?
Oh, well, it's a wonderful
arrangement, really.
You see, Thomas
runs around the West
risking his silly neck,
and I incorporate
his exploits
into my little true stories.
(typewriter dings)
You mean...
What he means is,
ain't nobody gonna buy
no stories
about no negro cowboys.
Well, well,
it's dramatic license,
really.
It's a necessary evil
in the literary world.
Dramatic license, hell!
A whole bunch of lies.
You made all that money,
and I never did see squat!
But what really gets me
is all that crap
about looking a man
right in the eye.
Hell, a man don't go
for a gun with his eye!
Gotta look at his hand!
I'll make a note of it.
Aah!
(man laughing)
(man shouting in Spanish)
Man 2:
He took my seorita.
Woman:
Locos.
Ms tequila!
They were with El Diablo
in the bank.
Shh.
The unattractive one
is Pestoso.
That other one
ain't no lady-killer.
Yes. That's Chak Mol.
Billy Ray: You know them?
Kid Durango:
Well, they come here
to unwind
after their forays
of raping and pillaging.
I've interviewed
both of them.
Pestoso is
surprisingly verbal.
Pestoso:
Ah! Ha ha!
(shouting in Spanish)
Hey, boy.
How do you feel about
being the fastest gun
in the West?
Huh?
(chuckling)
So you're the fastest gun
in the West, huh?
Do you know to whom
this belongs?
Where you get that,
gringo ? Huh?
Can you take me to him?
Take you to who?
"Take you to whom."
Qu importa, hombre?
El Diablo.
El Diablo? (laughing)
Where are you going,
gringo , huh?
Ow.
Adios, gringo.
(gunshots)
(grunts, groans)
Billy Ray:
I had successfully
shot a man in a showdown
in the middle of the street
at high noon.
Actually, it was
much later in the day,
but it was still
quite a thrill.
(chuckles)
Van Leek:
Good shot, boy.
Billy Ray:
I don't condone killing,
but this Pestoso
probably deserved it.
If he traveled
with El Diablo,
he had some
severe character flaws,
I was sure.
Good shot.
(blows)
(gasps)
(grunts)
You?
(grunts)
I meet you in the morning,
just outside of town.
The Tree of Death.
Come alone.
Tree of Death.
Ow!
S, s, Cecilia.
Tu nombre ser Cecilia.
Nombre de mi madre.
Never trust a man
who talks to his snake.
It's Truman.
Morning.
Van Leek:
What the hell you think
you're doing, Feathers?
Well, I've decided
to join your expedition.
Not with me, you ain't.
You won't
have to worry about me.
It's not you
I'm worried about.
I'm worried about us
with you out there.
Truman:
Oh, Thomas, please.
I'm sure I can perform
some very useful functions
on the trail.
And besides,
I'm an excellent cook.
Yeah?
Can you make coffee?
Well, as a matter of fact,
I brought along
some fresh Colombian beans.
And by the way, I make
a wonderful omelet.
Dancing Bear:
Hmm. What is omelet?
Well, omelet
is diced ham,
cheese, peppers,
folded into three eggs,
cooked in an iron skillet,
slightly oiled.
Mushrooms, snake meat,
squash good?
Good? Well, I wouldn't
recommend the squash,
but it's entirely
up to you.
For Christ's sake,
let's move out!
Come on!
Ho!
Billy Ray:
Even though I was still
somewhat puzzled
by the revelation
that Truman was Kid Durango,
or not Kid Durango,
I was excited
that he'd joined us.
It afforded me
the opportunity
to clear up
some of my confusion,
and I looked forward
to one of his omelets.
Now I still
don't understand
why you're coming
along with us.
Well, actually,
it's your example, Billy Ray.
You see, I've always written
about other people's exploits.
And, well, I'd like to think
that before I pass on,
I could include a few
adventures of my very own.
That was
such a wonderful moment
yesterday in the street
with you and Pestoso.
It was thrilling.
Virtually writes itself.
You're going to put me
in one of your books?
Of course.
Every story
needs its hero.
Hey, boy.
Let me see that spur.
Yes, sir.
Here, hold on
to that half, boy.
That's your calling card.
Well, go ahead on.
Be right behind you.
Go on.
Good luck,
Billy Ray.
Thank you.
Goodbye.
Excuse me.
Could you tell me precisely
why they call this
the Tree of Death?
Excuse me?
Billy Ray:
I met Chak Mol as arranged,
and I followed him
deeper into Mexico.
My nerves,
normally quite steady,
were acting up as I sensed us
getting closer and closer
to El Diablo.
I'm sure the tension
would have been eased
if Chak Mol had been
a better conversationalist.
Perhaps he was shy.
Thank you.
Shh!
Sorry.
Aah!
They're too spread out
for us to get all at once.
I think there might
just be a solution
to this problem
forthcoming.
Hombres!
Uno,
dos...
(gunfire)
...tres.
(grunts)
(growls)
We split up here.
That left tunnel lets you out
above the village.
You wait for my signal.
Good luck.
I, um, I think
a little prayer is in order
before we embark upon
this perilous ordeal.
Now if you will all
join me in reciting
"The Lord's Prayer."
Hyah!
"Our Father who--
"Our Father
who art in Heaven,
"Hallowed be thy name.
"Thy kingdom come.
Thy will be done
On Earth,
as it is in Heaven..."
This is very sorry war party
we have, brown man.
I did the best
I could, red man.
I'm here
to free my people.
Don't you get
in my way.
Wouldn't think of it.
Hyah!
Thomas,
I'd like to have
a word with you.
If it's short.
I find your behavior
in this endeavor questionable.
See, it's perfectly obvious
to me what you're doing.
You're using this boy
as a diversion,
so that you can steal
as much gold as you can carry.
Only Dancing Bear's
motivated by...
by honorable intentions.
As far as I'm concerned,
you're all a bunch
of mercenaries.
You finished?
Yes. I... I had to get it
off my chest.
Hope you feel better.
Come on, Rio!
(Rio neighs)
El Diablo won't touch that kid
without his spur.
Billy Ray:
When I arrived
at El Diablo's compound,
he was not
in the vicinity.
I decided to wait
and not be impatient.
I knew I was carrying an ace
in my pocket, so to speak.
(horse neighs)
So you are the boy
who killed Pestoso.
What is your name,
little boy?
William Raymond Smith.
Mister, uh...
Devil, is it?
And I understand,
Mr. William Raymond Smith,
you have brought
something for me.
Yes, sir.
This is my spur,
I believe.
That is correct.
There is
something missing.
That is also correct.
Where is the missing piece?
That's for me to know
and you to find out.
Oh?
I want to exchange it,
the missing piece that is,
for the girl.
And what girl is that?
Miss Nettie Tuleen.
You kidnapped her
in front of my school
about five weeks ago.
So many towns.
So many girls.
She's about 5'4",
blond hair,
blue eyes,
quite attractive,
and a very good student.
Does she look like...
this girl?
Yes, she does.
Uh, I don't recall
that outfit.
Yes.
She is quite
attractive.
Billy Ray:
I could not
believe my eyes.
This was not the Nettie
who was in my classroom
five weeks ago.
It was El Diablo's work,
I was sure.
And she is
a very good student.
Nettie!
I like my spurs
very much, Mr. Smith.
They belonged
to my father
and his father's
father's father.
I would like to have back
the missing piece
you have stolen.
Now, technically,
it wasn't stolen.
But, you see, Rosita--
Rosita?
My Rosita
means more to me
than a family bauble.
Huh.
There's the boy.
Uh-huh.
They're all over the place.
It seems your plan
has taken
an unexpected turn
for the worse, Thomas.
Aah!
Spare spurs.
Spoiled by spare spurs.
Try saying that
three times fast.
Spoiled by spare spurs.
Spoiled by spare spurs...
Shut up!
I'm sorry.
It's just I'm worried
about the boy.
Do you think
they'll hurt him?
I'm going to hurt you
if you don't shut up.
Kid Durango.
My people always
ride in the back.
All right, you can ride
in the front on the way home.
No, not the way home. Now!
It's your turn, Atalicus!
I'm not getting
in the back, not with
that Godforsaken pet--
Don't call her
Godforsaken.
Why you always say
"Godforsaken"?
Quiet! Quiet!
Whoa, whoa.
Hello, gentlemen.
I'll handle this.
These are my people.
Buenos das, amigos.
Cmo estamos?
Todo bien?
Nice pants.
These are not my people.
Damn it! I knew
we should've taken a right
at that last fork.
Should have turned right!
Throw down your weapons.
Come on, guys.
Settle down here, huh?
We got no quarrel with you.
We're just delivering
some supplies.
Yes,
Atalicus Collins' catering.
How do you do?
I would like to introduce you
to my assistants.
This is Bob and Bebe.
Roberto.
We have fine wines,
and delicacies, silken robes--
(gunshot)
What's in the bag?
It's nothing.
You can have anything
you want in the wagon,
but don't touch
the bag, okay?
I will decide
what I want.
Amigo,
I would rather die
than to give you
that bag.
Oh!
(horse neighing)
(laughing)
Any other requests?
Gringo, the bag!
Pronto!
(hissing)
Aah!
(snake rattling)
When my family came
to this country, Mr. Smith...
they encountered
incredible intelligence
and incredible savagery.
The Mayans built pyramids,
charted the heavens,
and gave us our calendar,
but the Aztecs brought
the art of human sacrifice
to a new height.
Aah!
(laughing)
(grunting)
(gunshots continuing)
Aw, Jesus!
Come on!
God! Come on!
Come on!
(grunting)
Oh, what the hell!
(laughing)
Yee-haw!
Yee-haw-haw-haw-haw!
El Diablo!
Company is coming,
you son of a bitch!
Ha-ha-ha-ha!
Yee-haw!
(grunts)
Man:
Cuidado!
Aah!
(women screaming)
(gunshot)
(grunts)
Whole lot different
than writing about it,
huh, Truman?
He took Nettie.
We have to catch him.
Mm-hmm.
(laughing)
Good old Bebe.
So that's
why you're here,
for the gold?
That's more important to you
than saving the girl?
Listen, boy,
that girl ain't my problem.
Billy Ray: I found a piece
of the outfit Nettie
was wearing
next to the cave.
(sneezes)
It confirmed my suspicions
that El Diablo had forced her
to escape with him.
Nettie?
Nettie!
Hello, little boy.
Looking for something?
I want the girl.
And how are you going
to get her back,
with your little stick?
(laughing)
Give up the girl,
Diablo.
Now, who is this,
little boy?
My name...
is Kid Durango.
(El Diablo laughing)
Oh. Kid Durango.
Am I to be frightened
by this name?
(whispering)
Truman, you don't
have to do this.
Yes, I do.
Truman.
Since you are the guest,
Mr. Kid Durango,
I will wait for you
to make the first move.
(coughing)
Truman-- Truman, you didn't
have to do that.
I did. I did.
I did.
Ow! It hurts.
Oh. I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
Ow. (panting)
I never thought
about the pain.
I assumed it would
be over quickly.
Perhaps I should have
looked at his hands,
not his eyes.
You know,
you're ruining
a perfectly good scarf.
I'm sorry.
(coughing)
I want you... I want you
to do something for me.
Anything. Anything.
I'll do anything.
Kill him.
Kill El Diablo.
Complete the story,
Billy Ray.
Truman, Truman,
you're not going to die.
I know.
I have never felt so alive.
In whose arms
are you going to die,
little boy?
He didn't even
go for his gun.
I was getting bored.
I am a busy man.
Now, where would you
like me to shoot you?
I will give you
the choice.
Where?
En la cabeza?
El corazn?
Uh...
El...
(laughing)
...estmago?
I would not
recommend the stomach.
It is very painful
and takes a long time to die.
But make your decision
quickly, please.
You have seen,
I am an impatient man.
How about you just wing me
on the shoulder,
right about here?
You are very funny,
little boy.
Ha.
I think maybe...
la cabeza.
Van Leek:
Diablo!
Finally, someone who is
worthy of the challenge.
Cut the bullshit,
El Diablo.
Make your move.
You want a chaw?
You want to try again?
(gunshot)
(gunshot)
Damn, boy.
You shot him in the back.
Well, his back was to me.
(laughs)
I forgot.
Billy Ray:
I shot El Diablo.
It may not have been
a showdown
in the middle of the street
at high noon,
but it happened.
Mr. Van Leek was there
to document the event.
He seemed to approve
of my tactics.
You done good, boy!
We buried the preacher,
Roberto, Bebe, and Truman
in the high plains.
Dancing Bear
picked out the spot,
saying that
the ground was rich
in his ancestors' blood
and would nourish
our compatriots' souls.
I don't have much left
to say
except I don't plan
to join you no time soon.
It was with great sadness
as I knelt to Truman's grave.
He had saved my life,
and there was no way
I would ever be able
to pay him back.
He had proven to be, perhaps,
the bravest of us all.
I regret that I would never
be able to really know him.
Man:
Coffee, flour...
(indistinct chattering)
Who's that?
It looks like
Billy Ray!
Woman:
Oh, my God!
Is that
Nettie Tuleen?
Man:
Who's with him?
Isn't that Billy Ray?
Sure looks different.
Yeah. Used to wear
a hat, didn't he?
Oh!
Girl:
That's Nettie Tuleen!
She's come back.
Man:
Didn't think
we'd see that boy again.
Whoa.
Thank you.
Coming back, Billy Ray?
Someday.
Did you kill El Diablo,
Billy Ray?
Only God can kill
the devil, Charlie.
That's right, Billy Ray.
That's right.
(laughing)
Billy Ray:
When I told Mr. Van Leek
that I was going to write
an account of our adventure,
his ears pricked up.
Suddenly, he was a fountain
of information.
Or should I say fabrication?
He really got rolling
when I mentioned
that I intended to pen
a whole series of books.
Hey, I don't want you
to be writing about
no white boy
with a fancy hat
and shirt.
I want to hear about
the way it really is--
how you square off
with another man,
you look him right
in the--
Right in the back?
Right. You look another man
right in the back
and you shoot him
before he knows--
before he knows
what hit him.
(laughs)
(both laughing)