Fujoshi Kanojo (How to Date an Otaku Girl AKA My Geeky Girlfriend) (2009) Movie Script

...hold hands?
...or not...
You don't want to?
No. I mean...
I don't mind.
Wow. It's beautiful!
Makes you kind of nervous, doesn't it...
Do you like holding hands?
Yes! But, err...
Not as much as I like you!
Will you...
go out with me?
There's something I should probably
tell you first...
Promise me you won't freak out
after you hear it...
I promise. I won't freak out,
and I won't hate you or anything.
an Otaku...
Are you cool with that?
Actually, in my case...
It's called a Fujoshi Otaku...
Are you freaking out?!
What? A Fujoshi...
That's normal, isn't it?
Aah, no... not that... um...
The word you're thinking of is spelt
a little differently...
I don't care if you are an Otaku...
or a Fujoshi or whatever...
love you, Yoriko.
Me too...
Love you too...
I guess that makes you my boyfriend.
Thank you!
You taste like cotton candy.
What the...?
Welcome home, Mademoiselle Yoriko.
Welcome home, Mademoiselle!
I am Ashigara, Head Butler
of this establishment.
These are your footmen.
We are at your service.
I am Kagami, Head Footman.
Tonishige, at your service.
Mademoiselle Kasumi awaits you inside.
Thank you.
Mademoiselle, your bags...
The Young Master's bags too...
Young Master?
Thank you.
This way.
Please mind your step.
What the...?
Welcome home.
Welcome home.
Err... I'm home...?
This is Kasumi.
She's into light novels and Internet games,
but mainly anime.
She also makes her own B-L comics.
She is like a mentor to me.
B- L?
Keep it a secret.
Nice to meet you, Hinata.
Nice to meet you.
This is Miki.
Her dress-up name is Milk.
This is her daughter, Mocha.
She is a full-time housewife, but...
Full-time housewife and Fujoshi
start with the same letter 'F'!
Oh, yes...
I see.
She's actually quite the popular
Play-R on the Internet.
P... Play-R?
Costume Play-R.
Oh, like dressing up.
That's right.
Excuse me.
No problem.
Allow me.
Excuse me.
Thank you.
What's with the looks?
He gets embarrassed easily.
How awesome!
I do not!
A 'Fujoshi' is an Otaku
girl who goes crazy
for the Boys-Love genre...
...which is all about love
between male characters
in a given story.
Oh my gosh!
Breaking in the newbie.
It sooo does it for me.
Ohh yes... All that 'training' and 'punishment'!
It's too much! Actually...
I think it is the 'punishment' that gets me...
Sorry for putting you out,
meeting here on our home turf like this...
No problem.
I could tell earlier you were thinking,
"Where is she taking me?"
You're all excited about your
first butler cafe, aren't you!?!
Well, you wouldn't tell me
where we were going.
I didn't want to ruin the surprise!
I see...
You really are polite, aren't you?
Even when you speak to Yoriko.
I know! How good is it?!
You're so lucky!
I bet it's not easy, going out with Yoriko.
Don't spoil her to much...
She'll just get worse!
You should start to treat her normally,
before she gets out of control...
But, she was my boss when I first met her...
I guess I kind of got into the habit of
speaking to her like that.
Somehow I can't seem to shake it.
This one is dangerous...
Sorry! For a moment there I nearly fell
for someone else's real-life boyfriend!
No problem!
That's why I wanted you
to see him for yourself!
You rock!
You're like... a Sebastian!
A Se... se... A what?
A loyal butler serving his mistress!
No way! Your own Sebastian!
He seems like a submissive type, too...
You love Yoriko, right?
No one gains anything without sacrifice.
Every gain requires a fair
exchange of value.
That's Alchemy's Law of
Exchange in Equivalence.
Al... Alchemy?
Love is...
Exchange in Equivalence!
I want a ring too!
Check it out... pretty cute, huh?
You want one too, don't you Mocha?
Do you want a ring, Mocha?
Exchange... in Equivalence?
That's right! Yes!
This story is a record of one guy's
struggle to date a Fujoshi Otaku girl.
How to Date an Otaku Girl
It will be fine.
I understand.
Ok, see you later then.
Hey, Koji.
You free tomorrow?
Sorry, I've got plans.
What? You going somewhere?
Something like that.
Who's Yoriko?
Hinata's girlfriend.
He met her at his part-time job.
So she's older than you then?
Pretty impressive!
Yeah, I guess she is...
Err... nothing.
So what's on tomorrow?
Nothing. I thought we could
maybe do that report...
Don't worry about it. See you later.
See you.
"Hinata 4 Yoriko"
I remember the day I fell in love.
This is Hinata.
He'll be working with us part-time.
He'll be working under you,
so I'll get you to show him the ropes.
My name is Yoriko. Nice to meet you.
My name is H... Hinata.
It's a pleasure to meet you.
Let's get started then.
Oh... Ok.
And now...
Hurry up, Hinata!
Yes. Yes... and this one too!
And this one!
And that one and that one!
So many to choose from... look at that one!
And this! Gotta have this!
Don't you think you are overdoing it?
But you can't normally get
these anthology back numbers!
This is awesome. Such a massive trove!
This place is too good to be true!
It's got everything I could ever want!
Thank you staff.
Thank you pundits. Good job!
Excuse me, but I don't understand half of
what you're talking about.
You will... you will.
What do you mean?
This is what makes the daily grind
all worthwhile, right?!
I thought we were going on a date today...
I can't help that we ran into
Kasumi by chance...
"Concerto Symphonia"
"Girls Comics"
This is like your gathering place...
Oh my gosh!
New issues! Yes!
Everyone's looking at you...
Yes! Yes! Yes!
New issues! New Issues!
It might be just me,
but I think everyone is staring!
Yep, they're staring.
No, you're right. They are staring.
Not many guys come to places like this.
Why did you bring me here?
Because you said: "Wow, a B-L store.
I want to see what one is like. "
I never said that!
- Don't worry, I will train you in B-L ways.
- No way!
Are you still deciding?
Yeah... wish I could see inside.
Don't be fooled by the excessive effort
they put into the covers.
You know how the saying goes.
You need to see the truth. Then decide!
O- oh...
He who shoots often will
surely hit the mark!
She's having a ball!
It's not the kind of interest
you can bring up easily...
Hey. How was the harvest?
Sorry. I guess we had a little too much fun.
The sacrifices I make being a mother...
I guess so...
Mocha, Mocha, come here.
I want heaps of comics too!
When you're older and you
get a job. Let's go.
No! You mustn't grow up to be like them!
Hinata, we're going!
Too many books for one person...
Hey! Hinata...?
What are you doing here?
It's not me, it's...
Just helping out... you know...
Koji, the movie's going to start.
Oh yeah...
I'll see you tomorrow.
Who was that?
A friend from university.
I see.
Why didn't you introduce me?
Ah... um...
You didn't want to be seen with me, right?
No, that's not...
...because I am a Fujoshi...?
Submissive Sebsy!
Hey! We're in public!
It's Ok, right?
Let's go.
"Hinata Suwa"
You should have introduced us.
It's just...
I was caught off guard...
You two...
You've been living together
for how long now?
We came up to Tokyo together
to go to university...
so... 4 years?
That's long!
Yeah, I guess so...
Hey, um...
What do you think's the secret...
to lasting so long?
Well, we're interested in the same things,
and have lots to talk about.
Good job!
Why do you ask?
I see...
Common interests...
I find her relaxing to be around, too...
You want a drink? I'm thirsty.
Let me get them.
As payment for helping with this report.
Ok. Just get me anything.
It's here!
Delivery for Mr. Suwo.
Thank you.
There you go.
Thank you.
Common interests...
"Some homework for you. "
Women sure do have an amazing imagination.
They take a story and make
another story from it.
Wait a second! This
character is not even gay
in the original...
What are you doing?
Here you are.
"Sebsy, what are you doing now?"
I am always 'Sebsy' now...
"I'm working on that report with Koji. "
You two-timer!
Oh... you've finished work?
Yes. I'm at home.
About the two-timing...
We are two guys.
That's why I'm worried!
Oh, I see.
Why does she think like that?
You guys get along a little too well!
You were out, but I got the delivery,
so it doesn't matter.
You mean you're at my place?
Wait a second?!
On the subject of two-timing...
I'm not the one with the strange voices
in the background.
Nothing to worry about. This is my life's work.
You said you got a delivery...
I let it go at the time, but...
I ordered it online, to be delivered today.
To... my house?
Yes. I bought it in your name.
Just checking - I'm sure it's not the case, but...
You're not going to tell me
it's a porno game, are you?
Don't be silly! It's not just any porno game!
It's a world-famous porno game!
It's a porno game?!
Why are you buying porno games with my account!?!
Using my account would be too embarrassing!
And stop saying 'porno game'.
Koji will think you are weird.
You'll blow my cover!
You make that sound like a big deal.
It IS a big deal!
Calm down! I'm nowhere near Koji right now.
Look, I'm leaving now, so just wait there.
Don't worry about it.
Today you and Koji just hang out
like good friends...
Koji... Sebsy... Koji...
Koji... Sebsy... Oh-h...
KojiSebsy... Ohh... Oh... h
Koji... Sebsy...
Sebsy... Koji...
Sebsy... Koji... Sebsy...
I am coming home right now!
Sorry Koji.
- I'll give you a ride.
- No, thanks!
Don't ask for details, just let me apologize.
She really gets jealous of your male friends.
It's sweet.
Um... it's probably not what you think.
She doesn't look like the insecure type.
It's a little surprising.
No, quite the opposite.
"She always looked like that at work too. "
So she's actually different then?
Ah... well, no...
She is probably feeling secure now,
and opening up to you.
I guess so.
It is a big deal...
Ah... nothing, just saying 'thank you. '
Hold on tight!
You'll fall off!
Don't say stuff like that, Koji!
Here we are.
This is Yoriko.
This is Koji.
Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you. I saw you the other day...
You were quicker than I thought.
I guess red bikes really are...
...3 times faster!
You're the Red Comet!
You bought the DVD box set, right?
Yep. Wanna borrow it sometime?
Can I? Bring it in tomorrow then.
You're like Char in Gundam!
Custom made...
Let me show you what my
new machine can do!
It's quite scary! I can't
stop my hands shaking.
Thanks for the ride.
Hitting the Bullseye is what counts!
Farewell for now.
My dear Artesia...
Are you Ok?
So, did you have fun in your head
with me and Koji?
No comment.
What the hell are you watching!?
Stop! Don't take it... It's mine...
I wouldn't take it if you paid me.
...surely you aren't going to keep stuff
like this at my place, are you?
Hey, Sebsy...
Read that to me...
...with feeling...
...playing both characters.
Gimme a break.
Ok then, Sebsy.
Tell me what you go crazy for,
apart from Cat-eared Nurse.
So I have to go crazy for Cat-eared Nurse?
You liked it when I dressed up like her last week.
I wasn't Cat-eared Nurse I was going crazy for...
It was you, if anything.
A 3-D crush...?
What? That's not the right way!
I'll teach you the truth that is 2-D!
First you must go crazy for Ayanami
from Evangelion.
Or maybe Macross and Haruhi
would be better for a beginner.
Start me off on Haruhi.
Then I can move on to Macross,
and learn to appreciate Evangelion.
Then I will meet Ayanami,
and the whole 2D world.
Finally, I could get into
hunting for porno games
and Bishojo DVDs...
...and then I will be so
into 2-D stuff that...
I probably won't feel anything
for you anymore...
I don't like that idea.
You are the one who suggested it.
Shut up. I said I didn't like it.
Even though 2-D crushes are the right way
and 3-D ones aren't?
Stop going on about it. A girl's mind is complex.
Well, as a "fair exchange"...
I will teach you the truth that is 3-D.
When you cheer up a bit.
What's wrong?
You don't think...
I'm a freak?
Why ask that all of a sudden?
I promised you from the beginning.
It doesn't worry me,
and of course, I won't hate you for it.
I used to...
go out with a guy I hid this kind thing from.
We stayed together for a while
after he found out...
Then he told me one day...
...that he thought I was a freak...
I thought maybe you'd suddenly
disappear someday too...
I got scared...
So that is what is with
the crash-course education.
I've never given
...anyone a promise ring before.
Please believe me.
I'll say it again.
I don't care if you are an Otaku, or a Fujoshi.
I love you, Yoriko.
"Concerto Symphonia Special Show"
Your love sets my heart on fire!
Thank you!
I can hear a lot of voices calling Razzle.
Do you know who I am?
Thank you.
I am jealous now. Who am I then?
Thank you!
Now I am the jealous one!
I want to leave...
Ok, let's move on.
Do you want to hear that famous line?
Do you?
Ok then.
I am happy we could meet today, ladies.
Calm down!
"And, as a special gift
for everyone here today... "
we have a special voice CD!
I loooooooooove Razzle!
Jun, you knew about it.
Did you hear how Hinocchi spoke to Jun just now?
That's a dead giveaway!
He never speaks to him like that
on the Internet radio show...
Razzle is the submissive one then!
Are you having fun?
If you're not having fun,
I'll have to force you to!
I know they're just the voices,
but they're starting to look real!
I have his voice as my phone ring tone.
Show me!
He just touched him on the shoulder.
What? Who did?
And Razzle is smiling!
I think I'm going to faint!
Jun, you're not sleeping enough.
Aren't you sleepy?
Don't be silly! I'm not soft like you.
If you keep playing the tough guy like that,
I might grow to love you.
So grow, then.
If you couldn't hear, don't worry.
You know what "love" means, right?
Of course I do!
You're so cute.
Now it is time for Animate's
...Concerto Symphonia Anniversary DVD Box...
Get ready for...
the final movement!
"Costumes & Party Goods"
These are so cute!
Hinata, what do you think?
That's cute.
Hinata! Try this on!
- It'll look so good on you!
- No!
Check this out! Yes?
Very cute.
I have to try it on!
Hinata, grab that wig.
The Hatsune Miku one.
Hatsune Miku?
This one!
See you soon.
What do you think?
Very nice!
Got it.
Can you stop that clicking noise?
You mean the pen?
"And the swiveling. "
No clicking or swiveling.
I've got an early christmas present for you.
Um... Ok...
Good morning.
Have a flyer.
Please take this.
"Santa & Reindeer Street Comedy"
Oh. Have a flyer!
You said you had no plans today, right?
Well, I don't have a girlfriend...
Well, why don't you come
over to my place later on.
Tonight you can...
be my sleigh ride.
Um... err... ahh!
Wanna swap? Ok...
Merry Christmas.
Hey Santa. Give me a present.
Oh, all right then. What do you want?
I want you.
You want m... what?
Santa's the dominant,
and the reindeer's the submissive.
Are you talking to yourself?
No. No.
Otaku poison...
The water is poisoned!
Thank you.
Welcome home, Yoriko.
I'm back, Sebsy.
Did you get the broccoli?
I forgot! Sorry.
I see.
I think there are some other greens somewhere.
It's Ok.
Yoriko. Check it out.
I got a suit. With a vest!
Love the apron. Very nice.
You must be tired from work.
I have run you a half bath,
so why don't you go and relax.
I am still preparing dinner, Mademoiselle.
"Genesis of Aquarion"
Yes yes yes.
How do you read this word?
Which one?
Ah, that's "Gyoko. "
Wait a minute!
That's my precious history book!
What do you think you're doing!?
Having a half bath.
I know about the bath.
I am talking about the book!
I'm borrowing it.
It will get all wet in the bathroom!
Oooh! Naughty!
I was talking about the book!
I am just reading. Don't be so uptight, Sebsy.
I'm not being uptight.
Either way, what does this "Gyoko" mean?
You're ignoring me?
It means like, unexpected happiness.
That kind of nuance.
You are
...tall, good-looking and clever...
and kind... and you sometimes wear glasses...
You must be popular, at University and all.
That's rather sudden. What's up?
Is something
The cheese fondue!
Unexpected happiness...
That was close.
Sebsy, I'm thirsty.
Thank you.
I was just thinking how good this book is.
What's up with you?
You keep calling and calling and calling...
What's wrong with that?
You're the kitchen boy, right?
Our life can't be a game all the time.
It's all right now...
But I don't think I can keep doing it forever.
Sebsy, wait.
"There's actually something I want to tell you... "
What is it this time!?!
I'm sorry, Master.
Can you stop calling me Master?
It makes me uncomfortable.
Anyway, Master...
I am really cold in this dress.
Warm me up, Master.
Is that the right attitude to ask
a favour of your master?
I'm cold, so hurry up, Master.
Stop talking and warm me up!
Yes, yes, yes, yes...
Hurry... I'm cold.
Mademoiselle is spoilt.
I'm cold! And you only need to say
"yes" once, Master.
You just want to say "Master" all the time.
Are you still cold?
I might...
...be moving to London for work,
A successful woman follows her dreams,
right, Master?
Pretty amazing, right?
I joined the company hoping to work
in England someday.
When you say "might"...
If you do go...
When will you be going?
Next month.
Next month?
When will you be coming back?
I don't know.
It might be permanent.
I don't know. I might come back
after two or three years.
And I still haven't decided if I will go yet.
...didn't you tell me?
I'm telling you now.
You never told me about...
...such an important dream.
Why didn't you tell me about it until now?
I'm still...
thinking. About whether to go or not.
You've had the dream for a long time, right?
Your dream.
We are talking about your life here.
You can't just give up so simply on...
I'm still deciding whether to go or not.
But you've been working towards it
all this time...
I just told you: I'm still deciding!
Do you think I should go?
So you think the sooner the better, then?
That's how it seems, as if it would be
a relief for you if I went.
That's not true!
Deep down, you do think I am a freak,
because I am a Fujoshi.
I never said...
You want a normal girlfriend,
not some annoying Fujoshi freak!
What the hell is wrong with you!?
Is that what you've been thinking?
That I...
...have been thinking that all along?
I'm leaving.
...what do you want to do?
If you don't go,
I think you'll regret it.
You've always said
it was your dream to live over there.
I had forgotten about it though.
That's why you joined your company, right?
And why you were an exchange student.
All for that goal.
maybe I shouldn't go...
You'll regret it.
I understand how you feel about Hinata, but...
You have to think about you, too.
She doesn't...
trust me...
because I am younger than her...
because I am still a student...
I thought Yoriko...
really needed me around...
I feel like such an idiot.
I was just a little butler plaything
she kept around for her amusement.
Being younger or a being a student...
doesn't have anything to do with it.
needed you in her own way, no?
You seem to understand her better than I do.
You're just saying that.
What do you want to say?
If you say it's her decision,
Then she won't talk it over with you.
I wouldn't if I were her.
Mama, I'm dirty!
Yes, I see.
All clean. Off you go.
She'll just get dirty again...
Kasumi called me just before.
Said she was sorry,
...said it was her ego speaking.
Not at all.
I was glad.
If you've made up your mind, I won't say a word.
Of course, Mocha and I want you to stay...
but no pressure...
I'm still
If I do go,
people like you and Kasumi,
who are into the same stuff I am...
might be hard to find.
It's been my dream for so long,
and I know I'll regret
it the rest of my life
if I don't go.
Kasumi was right.
I'm scared.
I don't know how my feelings will change...
Now I...
...am having so much fun,
which makes going that much scarier.
I'm so unsure.
What? No, I'll be fine.
I can't take all that food with me
to England anyway.
You take care of yourself too, Mother,
you're not as young as you used to be.
Say hi to Dad for me.
Yep. Ok. Bye.
Have you been waiting long?
Don't worry about it.
Shall we walk?
Do you want...
to hold hands?
Please be with me forever.
I can't imagine...
...my world without you.
made up my mind.
I'm going to go to London.
Aren't you going to...
say congratulations?
Don't go.
I thought you weren't going to try and stop me.
Go to London.
You've worked so hard for it.
You have my full support.
You're going to have to get more flexible,
so you can cut them yourself.
Maybe someday.
They'll just keep growing otherwise.
They'll get really long.
You'll have to learn to cut them yourself.
I'll get you to cut them.
They'll break off before I can get to them.
I want you to cut them.
I won't...
be around to.
I imagine it will be tough,
...but it's a present from the gods...
for all your hard work.
Make sure you
don't waste it.
We've been together just over two years...
It went so quickly.
It went quickly because we were together.
It's time to go.
You're right.
So quick...
I'll put the key...
on the table.
Let's say goodbye here.
It won't be any less sad at the airport.
I'll grab a taxi over there.
on your transfer to London.
Thank you.
I'm home...
And that is how me and
my Fujoshi girlfriend
went our separate ways.
I actually got through to you.
Long time.
Aren't you homesick yet?
Who do you think I am?
Still as focused as ever, I see.
That's right.
I am thinking of getting an MBA...
Really? Good for you!
Of course, I can't get into Cambridge,
but I'm thinking of doing it in London.
I'll say it again.
I really...
...want you to be with me forever.
You don't say that kind of
thing over the phone.
You're right.
Wait there a second.
Miss Surisaki?
This is a parcel for you.
Thank you.
Could you sign here please?
What's up?
I've got some sort of delivery.
What is it?
It's some cups I ordered the other day.
Well then, let's have a drink
...with those cups...
Can you stop raising my heart-rate
suddenly like that please?
No chance.
Are you Ok?
This took me months to choose.
It is a new type.
Be with me forever.
That's unfair, with this kind of timing.
Is it?
This ring is a...
Yes. It is exactly what it looks like.
I am selfish, and a Fujoshi...
And I think
I am going to call you Sebsy forever...
I know.
It is not a fair exchange!
But I get you.
You never learned that
you shouldn't make girls cry...
when you were small?
I did.
Well you've made me cry.
It's not nice.
I'll get angry.
I'm sorry.
Well then,
lend me your chest.
I need something to wipe my eyes and nose on!
This story is a record of one guy's
struggle to date an Otaku girl.
You're stuck with me now... forever.
Actually, that's a lie.
It's too one-sided to be called a struggle!
How to Date an Otaku Girl
Will you pour me some tea?
The really delicious one?
Yes, Mademoiselle.