Ghost Light (2018) Movie Script
[foreboding music]
[man] Over 400 years ago,
William Shakespeare
wrote Macbeth,
the medieval story
of the Thane of Glamis
and his wife,
who are inspired
by witches' sorcery
to commit mayhem and murder
and to take the crown
of Scotland.
Since earliest times,
actors who have performed
Macbeth,
have thought the play to be...
cursed.
[thunder rumbling]
[disembodied scream]
[suspenseful music]
[suspenseful music continues]
[bus engine revving]
[brake squeaking]
[indistinct chatter]
Oh, dear.
It's so rural.
At least we are no longer
on a motor coach.
Oh.
Okay, that'll do.
Aw, it's so cute.
- [Annabel] Okay.
- I gotta see what he wants.
- Oh.
- Oh.
It's better than I thought.
[bird cawing]
[sighs]
Pretty quiet.
Yeah, we were supposed
to be met.
- I'll go look for the guy.
- Okay.
George?
[Archie] George?
You here?
[bird cawing]
[door squeaks, opens]
[Henry] Oh, my god.
Look at this place.
[foreboding music]
[light switch clicks]
[light music]
[Madeline] Look.
Now, this is a theater!
- [chuckles]
- A sight for sore eyes!
Yes.
[laughs]
Huh.
- [whistling]
- [Elliot] No, no, no.
- What?
- [Madeline] Angels of ministers
and grace defend us!
Angels of ministers
and grace defend us...
No, no. Young man.
[Elliot] You should never,
ever whistle in a theater.
Oh, please.
The only thing worse
is letting the ghost light
go out.
Ooh, what's the ghost light?
That...
is the ghost light.
And it must always
remain burning
on an empty stage.
[chuckles]
Or what?
It'll get dark.
How magnificent!
[Alex] This will be the place
of my greatest triumph.
Our collective triumph,
I believe.
Our company, our triumph.
[Thomas] Our burden.
[Alex clears throat, sniffles]
Tomorrow,
and tomorrow,
and tomorrow...
creeps in this petty pace
from day to day,
to the last...
[scoffs]
...syllable of recorded time.
And all our yesterdays,
are...
lighted fools...
the way to dusty...
death.
You are really...
starting to embody
this role, Alex.
Hmm?
You're really starting
to embody this role.
Ah, yeah, it did feel different,
didn't it?
- Didn't you feel it?
- [Alex] Yeah.
- I felt it.
- [Alex] Yeah.
But I would say that
the Scottish King himself,
could not have done better.
- [Alex] Oh, thank you.
- Oh, because he's dead?
[Elliot groans]
Pay no attention.
Every line, remembered.
No easy task.
- [Elliot] Well done.
- Thank you.
Welcome!
Welcome, everyone.
This is George Pitard, he...
he owns the place. Wow.
Well, we sometimes think
it does own us.
[all laugh]
What a charming old theater.
[George] Ah, merci beaucoup,
mademoiselle!
Oh.
[smooches]
Uh...
my grandfather, he build it.
[George] We close for two years,
but decided to open again
now that the tourism
is picking up.
- For the leaf peepers.
- [chuckles]
Oh, and you are doing
the play Mac...
[blabbers]
Oh, The Play Scottish, eh?
Perfect, no?
Right where we left it off.
I'm guessing it was...
It was very popular.
Uh...
Not so much.
- [trunk clatters]
- [men grunting]
What the hell does Madeline keep
in this thing?
An ex-husband.
[bird caws]
Do you have any bars?
[Troy sighs deeply]
Nope. No bars.
Wi-Fi?
This look like the kind of place
that has Wi-Fi to you?
You've got to be kidding me.
Even Appalachia had Wi-Fi.
[Nigel] I'm waiting
for a callback.
You've been waiting
for that call back
as long as I've known you.
Ouch.
[thuds]
[Henry] You know, Madeline,
I've been thinking,
this theater is...
is so intimate.
It's beautiful.
Maybe you should tone down
your third witch just,
just a little here.
What... what do you mean?
Well...
this is Shakespeare, it's...
It's not Vaudeville.
[chuckles]
Vaudeville?
I received spectacular reviews
for my first witch in London.
With Mr. Derek Jacobi.
I remember,
but the witches should be...
malevolent.
Not...
hysterical.
Hysterical?
[Madeline] Shall I show you
the difference
between malevolent
and hysterical?
Oh, boy.
I am done with your insults
and lack of talent.
Now that was malevolent
and this is hysterical.
Macbeth!
Macbeth!
[Madeline] Macbeth! Macbeth!
Macbeth!
Macbeth!
- Macbeth! Macbeth!
- [Annabel] Hey, what's going on?
[Madeline] Macbeth!
- That didn't go so well.
- [Madeline] Macbeth!
- Uh, Archie.
- [Madeline] Macbeth!
Won't you, uh...
go and get her, make her run
around the theater to undo it.
Run?
That's gonna take a while.
[Henry] Well, carry her
if you have to.
All right.
Wait, undo what?
The curse.
Are you serious?
We are performing the Bard's...
greatest
and most dangerous play.
- You mean, Mac...
- No, no. Just stop.
You cannot say
the name of The Scottish Play
in the theater
unless it is part
of the performance.
[Henry] It unleashes
the witch's evil magic.
The name is cursed.
The play... is cursed.
[Madeline] Put me down,
you little shithead!
Oh, god. Whoever let you
into the theater...
And... and everyone
believes that?
Oh, everyone knows that.
Apparently,
in some ancient production,
some jealous actor
killed the star
with a real knife
in the murder scene.
And in doing so,
was doomed to play the part
for all eternity.
And even the greatest role
created for the stage
can be tedious
after a century or two.
[Madeline] Goddamn it,
just put me down!
Put me down, you Neanderthal!
Just put me down!
- [Archie grunts]
- [thuds]
- [groans]
- [Archie] It's done.
[Henry] All the way around?
She swore, she spit?
I spit, she swore.
You heard her.
Uh, but...
she did not beg to be readmitted
to the troupe.
You know the rules, Madeline.
Beg!
But I am not sorry.
You don't have to be sorry,
but you do have to beg.
[Elliot]
Now, my buttery biscuit.
You don't want some unfortunate,
unforeseen circumstance
to be on your conscience,
do you?
[sighs]
Oh, please, my liege, my Lord.
Uh, may, I, poor maid that I am,
know again
the warmth of your radiance
and rest beneath
the towering branches
of your beautiful cherry...
Okay, okay, Madeline.
Very nice. Very nice.
- Really, was it?
- [Henry] Yes, it was.
Now, tell me the truth.
- Was it good?
- [Henry] No, it was beautiful.
- [Henry] It was very nice.
- Thank you.
[Henry] Welcome back.
Henry...
I'm so happy to be back.
Thank you.
So, the kitchen is stocked,
and the Levesque sisters
soon will be here.
They drive the car
from Montreal, eh?
Do they know the place well?
Oh, very well.
They have come many seasons.
They can be help for you
with costumes,
should that be
the need you have.
They were excited
when I told them
we were to make things go again.
[cuckoos]
[foreboding music]
Sorry I was a dick out there.
I guess...
[inhales deeply]
[chuckles]
...I don't quite know how to be.
Like I do?
How's your room?
[Troy] Uh, it's good.
Yours?
It's nice.
You're, um...
You're welcome to come visit.
Uh, we could run lines or...
I think...
that might make it harder
to get to the...
just friends stage.
I know.
I know.
I just, uh...
[sighs deeply]
I just miss you, though.
Me, too.
[inhales deeply]
Tomorrow...
and tomorrow,
and tomorrow...
creeps in this petty pace,
from day...
to day,
until the last syllable
of recorded time.
And all our yesterdays
have lighted fools
the way to dusty death.
A... oh, fuck...
[chuckles]
[sucks teeth]
Well, I should be
playing Macbeth.
Macbeth.
Macbeth.
Macbeth!
Macbeth!
[birds flutter]
[ominous music]
You are so naughty.
[Liz clicks tongue]
[Thomas] Oh, hello.
[Liz] I knew
I would find you here.
- [Thomas] And so you did.
- [Liz] Yeah.
[Thomas] Hmm.
[smooching]
God.
I don't know how many,
how many more of your
husband's performances
I can endure.
[Liz chuckles]
Well just imagine
the performances
that I have to endure.
Oh, god. No, thanks.
- That's horrifying.
- [Liz laughs]
Don't worry, sweetheart.
You'll play the Scottish king...
- [Thomas] Yeah?
- ...soon enough.
- [Liz] Mm-hm.
- Do you mean Macbeth?
[Liz gasps]
Yeah.
Yes.
You will, one day,
be the greatest...
[Thomas] Mm-hm.
- ...Macbeth!
- [gasps]
Oh!
Ever.
- Come on.
- Oh.
We gotta go.
- Before your husband sees us.
- Okay.
- Tonight?
- Yeah.
- [Thomas] Yeah?
- Before his Xanax kicks in.
[Thomas chuckles]
[Thomas] What was it
that you saw in him, anyway?
- [Liz laughs]
- [Thomas] Was it the moustache?
[crackles]
I'll be loving you
Always
[Annabel] Troy.
Look behind you.
We've been dancing to this...
- So cute.
- ...since before Annabel
- was born.
- [Elliot sighs deeply]
I remember as if
it were only yesterday.
[Madeline chuckles]
My little radish.
[both chuckling]
[indistinct chatter]
Okay, does this look good?
- I think so, I think we're done.
- Mm-hm.
All right, everyone.
Linguini al pomodoro e polpetto
for 11.
- [Annabel] Yay!
- Dinner is served.
[Archie] Thank, god.
I'm starving.
Oh, my god.
This looks fabulous.
[Nigel] Thanks.
You've always liked my cooking.
[Annabel] Oh, my gosh,
it smells so good.
I am starving.
- [Alex chuckles]
- This is nice.
It'd be fun to run
a place like this, huh?
Hmm, and your job would be
refilling the glasses?
[Liz] Someone has to pour.
Yes, and someone has to drink.
[utensils clinking]
Did I ever tell you about
my connection to Top Gun?
[Annabel] No.
Oh, god.
If I have to listen to this
threadbare story one more time,
- I'll hang myself.
- [chuckles]
Come on, I had over
four callbacks for that movie.
- Really?
- Mm.
When I met with Tony Scott,
he assured me I had the part.
Wait, of Maverick?
Hm?
The Tom Cruise part?
No, no. Duck, the guy who died.
[chuckles]
[Archie] Goose. Mm.
The character was Goose.
Duck, duck, goose. Whatever.
I have much better hair
than Anthony Edwards.
Really, good hair
can be very important.
[Alex] Yes, very.
- [door creaks open]
- [Annabel] Oh.
- [all gasp]
- [Nigel] What was that?
[Edna] 'Allo, 'allo!
The wind is picking up, eh?
[Eloise] We are
the sisters Levesque.
Your caretakers.
We are a little late, sorry.
Yeah, George said
you'd be coming.
- Welcome.
- I am Eloise.
- Hi.
- And this is Edna.
[Edna] So nice
to be meeting all of you.
[Edna chuckles]
Oh, I see someone knows
the cooking?
Yeah, there's plenty for you.
[Eloise] Oh, thanks to you.
Maybe we should be the actors
and you the cooks, eh?
[all laugh]
I don't think it's funny.
It's not funny to me.
[wolf howls]
- Good night.
- [Madeline] Bonsoir, my darling.
Oh, there you are, honey buns.
I've been looking
all over for ya.
Watcha doin'?
- Mmm.
- Oh, oh.
Oh, alone time again.
Got it. Got it.
Well, I'm feeling kinda bushed,
thinking about turning in.
- How about you?
- In a bit.
- Okay.
- Okay.
Don't be too long,
if you know what I mean.
I know what you mean.
[chuckles]
Okay, sweetie.
Okay.
[sighs deeply]
[wings fluttering]
[ominous music]
[owl hooting]
[clock ticking]
[thunder crackles]
Whoa.
This storm makes me horny.
Hey, honey. Honey?
I just had an idea.
How about we do a little, uh,
doctor-patient play?
[Alex] It's been a while
since your last checkup.
Okay, great idea.
[playful music]
I put your Xanax on the table.
Already took it.
That's why we only have
a short window, my sweet.
I can't wait.
[Alex] Me neither!
[Liz] I'm just taking off
my face, okay?
Don't take off too much.
I like it the way it is.
Well you know,
so much of the thrill
is in the anticipation.
Yes, maybe for you.
[chuckles]
Ah.
[playful music]
Dr. Osgood is back!
- [thunder rumbles]
- [chuckles]
[grunts]
[exhales deeply]
[yawns]
[Alex] Honey!
What's takin' so long?
My appointments are backing up.
[gasps]
[blows air]
- [thunder rumbles]
- Ah!
[panting]
- [knocks on door]
- [Nigel] Troy, Troy, please.
Please, please, please.
Please, can I come in?
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
[door closes]
[Alex snoring]
[in soft voice]
I'm ready.
[Alex snores]
[ominous music]
[thunder rumbles]
- [disembodied voice] Thou...
- Jesus!
...shall be Macbeth!
[thunder rumbles]
Oh, my god.
[chuckles]
Jesus.
[Thomas sighs deeply]
It's you.
[door closes]
And who were you expecting?
You, of course.
It's just, the lightning...
startled me.
[smooching]
[Liz giggles]
Does this startle you?
[both chuckle]
What's wrong?
- You seem tense.
- No, I'm not.
I'm not. I'm...
Yeah. I am, actually.
I am.
Because I don't think
I can work for that amateur
for one more day.
- He's Dr. Osgood, M.D.
- Mm.
He has saved thousands of lives
over 17 glorious years.
Yeah, yeah.
What a genius.
You know, being a soap star,
doesn't make you an actor.
It does make you rich, though.
Well, maybe he should've spent
some of that money
on drama classes.
Hmm.
And what do you suggest
as an alternative?
Mmm, an accident?
[chuckles]
I love your dirty mind.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
Well, the stage can be
a very unpredictable
and dangerous place.
- Mm-hmm, yes.
- Mm-hm?
Yes, it can.
[both moaning]
[ominous music]
[foreboding music]
[Henry] Thomas,
you want to go back
to the beginning
of Banquo's last scene?
No, it's okay. I'll start here.
[Henry] Okay.
- [Archie] I figure we put...
- Thou hast it now.
- [Thomas scoffs]
- ...a show on his entrance.
[Archie] We could go
with blue, red...
King, Cawdor, Glamis,
- all as the weird women...
- Henry!
I'm ready for a run through
of the dagger scene.
[Henry] Uh, right.
Uh, that's a good place
to start.
[scoffs]
Of course, I know my part.
[scoffs]
Jeez.
- [Alex clears throat]
- Is he going deaf or just...
playing dumb?
He's not playing.
[Henry] Jason.
Jason!
Jason!
Focus, Jason.
Dagger scene.
[Henry] You better know
your lines, Annabel.
Yup.
Oh, Archie.
Uh, we're gonna need you to play
the second witch.
Uh, I thought Nigel
was doing that?
No, he's having trouble making
his makeup change into Malcolm.
Okay.
- [smooching]
- [Henry] Jason!
- Mm. Hold that thought.
- [Annabel chuckles]
Yeah, sorry.
[Jason groans]
[Henry] Jason! Goddamn it!
Where's the dagger?
- [Alex vocalizing]
- Thank you.
[Alex clears throat]
[Henry] Little higher, please.
Good.
Alex, just stand there
and reach for it.
Okay, okay, you're...
Reach for it, but do not take
- possession of it. Remember?
- Oh.
- Mm-hm, mm-hm. Yeah, yeah.
- [Henry] Okay?
It's a vision.
All right? A haunted dagger.
Okay? Theatrical illusion.
[Henry] Don't touch it.
Don't touch it.
- Right.
- [Henry] Right?
- Theatrical illusion.
- Okay. Yeah, yeah, of course.
[chuckling]
Sorry, sorry.
It's just...
Okay.
- [clears throat]
- [Alex inhales deeply]
Is this a dagger,
which I see before me,
handle, toward my hand?
- [Jason groans]
- [Annabel chuckles]
Come, come, let me clutch thee.
[Alex] I have thee not,
and yet...
I have thee not, and...
[grunts]
Hey, Henry.
- Henry. Sorry, sorry
- [Henry] Hm?
[Alex] I just...
[chuckles]
[Alex] I have an idea.
[clears throat]
Now, I know you said
I shouldn't touch it,
but, but...
how about,
how about we mix it up a little
and I do, actually,
grab the knife.
- [Henry] No, Alex.
- Huh?
You don't...
mix up William Shakespeare,
Alex.
You can't grab
the phantom knife.
It's just...
[sighs]
It's so tempting to have a prop
to work with, ya know?
[Thomas] Yeah.
Especially when you've got
so little talent to work with.
What did he say?
I said,
"Especially when you've got
so little talent to work with."
Well, how about I...
[clears throat]
How about I fire you?
And then you have no job
to work with.
How about them apples?
Stop! Stop it!
Cut the crap, you two!
You understand me?
- Now, kiss and make up.
- Huh?
Fine.
I use a lot of tongue.
[light music]
[Henry] Uh, Thomas?
You can give them the cue.
- [Thomas] Yeah?
- [Henry] Yup.
Um...
It will rain tonight.
Let it come then!
[all screaming, grunting]
All right, all right, all right!
All right. Enough. God, stop.
I thought we were rehearsing.
Just take it easy. Jesus.
- It just feels so right.
- Oh, really?
- Yeah.
- You want it to be convincing.
- Right?
- Uh...
Well, a little more butch,
certainly.
But, uh, just, why don't you
save your testosterone
for tomorrow night, okay, guys?
Let's, uh, let's do it again.
Hello?
[girl] Hi, um...
do you know where I sign up
for the yoga retreat?
Oh, we, uh...
Uh, that's not here.
[Henry] This is the theater.
Riverside Resort, right?
I saw it on Trip Advisor.
Oh, my goodness.
[Eloise] That was three years
gone ago.
Mr. George, he thought
it could be a money maker,
but... nothing.
- Oh.
- Are you, um...
are you hiking
the Appalachian Trail
or something?
Yeah, and I scheduled
my entire hike
around this retreat, so.
Oh, god.
[Edna] Oh, my goodness.
[chuckles]
Who is this I am seeing now?
Edna, she came
for the yoga retreat.
[both chuckle]
[Edna] Eloise and I
cannot even do
the downward canine, I'm afraid.
[both laughing]
Oh, young lady,
what is your name?
- Juliet.
- Oh, Juliet.
Beautiful name.
- It's French.
- Mm.
Oh, you stay
for refreshment, Juliet?
Uh, no, no, I'm really fine.
Yeah.
Why not? Stay, stay with us.
I don't want to impose.
It's not an imposition.
Really.
[chuckles]
[suspenseful music]
[water sloshing]
Oh, at last!
Nap time!
Die, Duncan!
[both grunt]
[thuds]
[approaching footsteps]
Fainting.
[thuds]
Oh, Elliot. Must you?
[Madeline and Elliot laugh]
[Elliot] Haven't lost my touch
have I, darling?
Impressive.
A method taught to me
by Sir Lawrence Olivier's
stunt double himself.
What happened to Nigel?
[sighs]
The sight of blood.
Does it every time.
But it's not real blood.
[Madeline] Oh, well!
Then it must have been
your performance, dear.
[Elliot] Oh. Thank you.
Only one small problem, really.
What's up?
I cannot get up.
[scoffs]
Don't worry, I got you.
[clearing throat]
Uh, crown, please.
[clears throat]
Thank you.
[sighs]
[Henry] Let's have a look
at our king then, huh?
Alex.
It's amazing!
It doesn't make me look, uh...
No, you look absolutely regal.
- I do?
- [Henry clicks tongue]
Huh.
[clears throat]
I guess I do, don't I?
Well...
[scoffs]
[clearing throat]
Uh, your king
is eternally grateful.
- [both] Oh.
- As...
we all are.
We love the show people.
[all laugh]
[Edna and Eloise]
Beautiful, beautiful.
Yes, right?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, pull it out.
Till Birnam Wood comes
to Dunsinane.
- No! Save it!
- Huh?
Okay, it's time for the witches
to meet the Scottish King.
Archie, why don't you go
get your wig?
- [Archie] Got it.
- [Thomas] What?
- Hang on.
- [Archie] Mm-hm.
Sorry. I thought this was just
a straight run through?
We've got our first performance
tomorrow night.
No, we have to run
Archie's lines, so.
I just wanted to say thanks
before heading out.
[Alex] Henry.
- Hmm.
- Why don't we, uh...
ask this young lady
if she'd like
to play the second which?
I have this covered.
Me? I, I, I really need
to get going.
No. No, actually, I...
I think that could work.
Honestly, it probably
would be better
to have a woman with us,
at the cauldron.
No offense, Archie.
None taken.
Have you ever acted before?
A little in high school.
Well you'll fit
right in here, then.
Performing Shakespeare
can be thrilling.
You know, we did do
some Shakespeare, actually.
Ans there is, of course,
a modest stipend.
Most modest, I assure you.
[chuckles]
[sighs]
Well, it would be nice
to sleep in a bed for a change.
[Juliet sighs]
I just... I don't want
to embarrass you.
Oh, dear,
we are able to embarrass
ourselves quite capably
without additional help.
- [chuckles]
- [Madeline] Oh, Elliot.
[ominous music]
This...
- is our dressing room.
- [Juliet chuckles]
And here,
here is our makeup.
[Juliet] Mm-hmm.
So much fun, isn't it?
[all laugh]
[Madeline] Here are
our costumes.
- [Juliet] Oh, wow.
- [Annabel] Ooh.
And here, my darling,
is your robe!
- [Juliet] Wow.
- Oh, yes.
They really help us
get into character, you see.
- Wow.
- Even in rehearsals.
It looks amazing.
It's just like playing dress up
when we were little, right?
[all chuckle]
[Madeline] And to get
to stage right,
we go this way.
Be careful, my darling,
watch your step.
Oh, here are our props.
Follow me.
The flooring is a bit uneven.
[chuckles]
Watch your step,
watch your step.
[electricity crackling]
[Madeline] Oh. Oh, yes.
Old theater, old wiring.
You'll get used to it.
I'm sure.
[Annabel] So, Juliet,
we go under the stage,
and then we pop up
on the other side.
[chuckles]
[Annabel] It's so cool.
Juliet.
[foreboding music]
[Thomas moaning]
It was brilliant.
[Alex]And all our yesterdays...
have lighted fools
the way to dusty death.
Out, out, brief candle!
[electricity crackles]
Very funny.
Turn the lights back on.
Jason?
Turn the lights on, please.
I'm rehearsing here.
[disembodied voice]
Thomas?
Is that you?
Jason?
[foreboding music]
Hello?
[disembodied laughter]
Anybody there?
[suspenseful music]
- [Alex screaming]
- [clanks]
- [grunting]
- [metal clattering]
Help!
Alex is hurt,
I don't know what happened!
- Hurt? What?
- What?
- [Henry] Oh, no.
- [Archie] Nobody panic.
Nobody panic.
[indistinct chatter]
- [Henry] Alex.
- [women gasp]
- Alex.
- [tapping]
Hey, wake up, man!
- Alex.
- [Liz] Alex?
- Alex.
- [Alex] Mm?
- Can you hear me?
- Liz Beth.
- Is that you?
- [Liz] Yes.
I, I, can hear you, but I...
I can't see you.
[Liz] What happened?
[Alex] I, I don't know.
I heard something, and...
- And then everything went black.
- [Madeline gasps]
The curse!
Oh, god.
What curse?
[Alex] I'm fine.
Uh, let me... let me sit up.
[grunts]
Let me sit up, and...
and gather my thoughts.
Well, that should be
quite a harvest.
- [Henry] Alex.
- Hm?
[Henry] You sure
you're all right?
[blows raspberries]
[Alex] Of course, I'm all right.
I'm better than all right.
- Here, help me up.
- [Madeline gasps]
[grunting]
[sighs]
After a near-death experience,
one sees one's purpose
in a new and crystalline light.
I am ready to give
the Scottish King my all.
[inhales deeply, clears throat]
Tomorrow, and...
Uh...
[sighs]
Line?
- Uh, "Tomorrow."
- Ah!
Yes, that's right.
[chuckles]
Tomorrow, and tomorrow,
and, uh...
- Uh, line?
- [all] "Tomorrow."
[chuckles]
Oh, yes.
How could I forget.
[chuckles]
Uh...
[sighs]
Oh, it's right there.
Just over the rainbow,
my darling.
Oh, dear! Oh, dear.
I'm still a little high,
but I'm fine.
- I'm all right. I'm fine.
- [Madeline] I say bravo!
- [Elliot] Courage!
- I say bravo!
- [Elliot] Courage!
- [Alex] I'm okay.
- [all clapping]
- [Elliot] Bravo!
[Alex] Okay. Yes, done. Okay.
All right, Thomas.
Looks like you're gonna have
to play The Scottish King,
and I'll do Banquo.
As you wish, my Lord.
Cut the crap.
You know, I do not know
how Alex got whacked,
but he did.
And now, you're our only choice.
I'm ready.
You know, you might be
a good actor,
but you're a consummate asshole.
The only good thing about this,
is that we get to cut
your head off in the last scene.
Thanks for your support, Henry.
[ominous music]
[water sloshing]
[gasps]
[suspenseful music]
[gasping]
Where is the Thane of Cawdor?
We coursed him at the heels,
but he rides well.
See, see our honored hostess.
[Liz shrieks]
Out!
Damn spot.
[panting]
Uh, wrong scene?
That's Act Five.
Act Five.
[foreboding music]
[Liz sighs deeply]
Look at my hands.
They're lovely hands.
Yeah. They don't show
your age at all.
I just need a little help
washing the blood off.
Sorry.
[chuckles]
Guess it's happy hour
already, huh?
- Come here. Are you okay?
- Yeah.
[groans]
I'm, I'm realizing, that...
how upsetting it must have been
to see Alex get hurt.
[panting]
Henry, I need you to help me
wash this blood off of my hands.
You know I love
the method acting, Liz.
But there is no blood,
in reality, there's...
- there's no blood.
- [Liz panting]
[breathing heavily]
- No?
- No.
No, no blood.
- But, no...
- No!
But very, very, convincing.
I mean, that...
that's some real conviction.
Like...
Crazy ass conviction.
[Henry and Liz laughing]
[Henry] Oh, that's...
[Liz] Uh, there is no blood.
I see that now.
There's no blood.
There's no blood.
- All right. Okay.
- Okay?
- Okay.
- No, no, no.
Let's give us a start
from the top.
- Let's go back to the top.
- Okay.
- Come on, dear.
- [Liz] Okay.
- Okay.
- Okay.
- No, no, no. Come on.
- [Liz] Oh.
Fresh start.
Very good.
- [Liz] Whoo!
- [Alex] All right?
[Liz laughing]
- [Nigel] You're like so in it.
- [Liz laughs]
- [Troy] Got me.
- [Nigel] Wow.
I thought I saw it, you know?
[Liz] Okay.
[suspenseful music]
[in soft voice]
I think maybe it's time to start
thinking about you
playing Lady Macbeth.
- Okay.
- From the "Thane of Cawdor."
[foreboding music]
So...
seems I will be Macbeth.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, it does seem that way,
doesn't it?
You know, I dreamed it
last night.
It's probably a prophecy.
It's not a prophecy
if you make it happen, Thomas.
Seriously?
[Thomas] I... I had nothing
to do with that.
You don't think I'd actually try
and kill him?
Well, you did say
that there would be an accident.
[Liz] You know how
the play goes.
We murder the king.
Okay, well.
Alex is on permanent bed rest
now, so...
all's well that ends well.
Oh, maybe for you.
- [Thomas] Hm?
- You know.
Maybe for you.
Why don't you man up?
- Huh?
- Hm?
Why don't you man up?
[Thomas chuckles]
Come to my woman's breast.
Yeah, all right.
Okay, okay, Liz.
You're scaring, scaring...
you're scaring me.
Enough with
the Lady Macbeth shit, okay?
Maybe everything ends well
for you,
but it doesn't end well for me,
it never does.
[ominous music]
[Alex] Is this...
a dagger which I see before me?
The handle toward my hand?
Come...
let me clutch thee.
I have thee not, and...
yet I see thee still.
Art thou not, fatal vision,
sensible to feeling as to sight?
Or art thou
but a dagger of the mind?
A false creation,
proceeding...
from the heat-oppressed brain.
[clapping]
[Elliot] Bravo!
- Bravo! Spectacular!
- [all clapping]
[Elliot] Bravo!
You know, I,
I kinda felt that, Henry.
- We all did, Alex.
- Oh.
Oh, well done...
my King!
What happened?
Alex is recovered.
More than recovered, actually.
Cured.
He just got some crazy-assed
kind of theatrical penicillin.
No, no, no.
No. That can't be.
That can't be.
We...
We should be sensitive
to his injury.
Life's but a walking shadow,
a poor player that...
- struts.
- And our eyes do not deceive us.
I, for one, am willing
to call it a miracle
and leave it at that.
It is a tale...
told by an idiot.
Full of sound and fury,
signifying...
nothing.
[somber music]
- What happened?
- Don't ask.
The weird sisters
Hand in hand
Posters of the sea and land
Thus do go about, about
Thrice to thine
And thrice to mine
And thrice again
To makeup nine
Peace
The charm's wound up
So foul and fair a day,
I have not seen.
How far is't call'd to Forres?
[Alex] What are these...
so wild and withered
in their attire,
they look not like
th' inhabitants o' th' Earth.
Speak if you can.
What are you?
[Juliet] All hail, Macbeth.
Hail to thee, Thane of Glamis.
All hail, Macbeth.
Hail to thee, thane of Cawdor.
All hail, Macbeth,
that shalt be king, hereafter.
Fantastic.
That was...
- spectacular!
- You think so?
Everybody, take five minutes.
Let's do the whole scene again.
Alex, come here, come here,
I want to talk to you.
I got a great idea.
- [Alex] Okay.
- [indistinct chatter]
- [Thomas sighs]
- He's good.
What?
- He's very good.
- Yeah, no, I heard you.
He's still an imbecile.
I mean, idiot savants
can play Mozart.
"All hail Macbeth."
[mutters]
I can't take it anymore.
You had your chance.
[somber music]
[birds caw]
Alex!
Alex!
[Alex] Huh?
[Thomas] I've been...
I've been looking for you.
What?
I just... I wanted to apologize,
for being so rough
on you before.
[Alex] Ha! That's a first.
[canoe clattering]
[Thomas] Let me give you a hand.
[both pant]
[Thomas] You know...
[clears throat]
I have to say that was some...
wonderful acting, back in there.
[scoffs]
And that surprises you?
No.
No, just, um...
I'm wondering
where it came from, really.
[Alex] Well, you know I, uh...
I feel it in here, and in here.
Yeah, I think
I was born to play Mac...
Uh-uh.
[blabbers]
- Scottish King.
- [Alex chuckles]
- [Alex] Yes, yes, of course.
- Yeah.
That crazy Scottish King.
[chuckles]
[Alex] Yeah, you know,
I think this is gonna be
my best performance.
I don't know, it's like he's...
he's inside of me.
It's like, uh...
next stop, Broadway.
[snickers]
Oh, whoa!
- [groans]
- [clatters]
- [Thomas grunts]
- [water splashes]
[playful music]
Jeez. You okay?
[yells]
[grunting]
Kill her
With your alien lies
Kill her
With your expert disguise
Bump, bump, bump
Kill him
With your luscious lips
Kill him
With your swaying hips
Bump, bump, bump
Is it done, then?
What do you think?
I think...
that a real man
carries out his intentions.
And that he takes
what he knows can be his.
Listen to
The city sirens howl
That's what I think.
Hunters on the prowl
Bump, bump, bump
With hair
All wind-swept skunk
She meets
Apocalyptic cyberpunk
And they go bump, bump, bump
Bump in the night
Hearts are sinking
Awfully fast
Like olives
In a sweating glass
Bed time
The clock strikes twelve
Hurry, hurry, hurry
Schnau, schnau
[screaming]
[gasps, sighs]
Ah, there you are.
We're ready for you to finish up
our run through.
I know you know the part,
but I...
[Henry] You feeling all right?
[sniffles]
I've been feeling a bit odd.
[snickers]
Um, might I suggest, uh...
maybe a lighter touch
with the gin?
Thomas and I set off the curse.
Liz...
there's no curse.
How do you know that, though?
How can you be sure?
[Henry] Trust me.
The idea of it...
helps bring the play's
sorcery to life. That's...
That's all, it's...
[Liz] Hmm.
Okay. So, maybe
we're just all...
ench... enchanted...
enchanted by the possibility.
Exactly.
Great acting demands...
surrender to the imaginary.
And you are a great actress.
[chuckles]
Thank you.
[Liz chuckles]
So, you'll come back inside?
- All right?
- Okay. Yeah.
Yes. All right.
- [both chuckle]
- [Liz] Sure.
[sniffles]
[gasps]
[sniffles]
[sobs, sniffles]
[sighs]
[suspenseful music]
[thunder rumbles]
[rain pattering]
[groans]
Oh!
[thunder rumbles]
[ominous music]
[laughing]
[Annabel] Oh, Jason!
[giggling]
[ominous music]
- [thunder crashing]
- [Alex snoring]
[snoring continues]
[thunder rumbles]
[Alex snoring loudly]
[Liz grunting]
- [disembodied voice]
- [Liz gasps]
[disembodied voice]
Kill him.
[electricity crackles]
[disembodied voice]
This thou must do!
[Alex coughing]
[gasps]
Oh!
You wicked girl.
You know how I like
a little rough trade.
That was fun.
[chuckles]
Do it again. Do it again.
- No. No.
- [Alex] Huh?
What? Why not?
Honey, come on.
Put the pillow on my face.
[Alex] Tank it in.
Hold it down.
Come on, come on! No?
[disembodied voice]
Unsex me.
What? What is it? What?
[disembodied voice]
Something wicked this way comes.
[disembodied laughter]
Are you okay?
[Liz snickering]
- [disembodied cackle]
- [Liz snickering]
[thunder rumbles]
[disembodied voices]
[thunder rumbles]
[disembodied voices]
[Troy] Hello? Hello?
Did you hear something?
Apparently, we all did.
I heard... I heard voices.
It's just the wind.
- [doors slams]
- [all scream]
[gasps]
The wind?
- Uh-huh.
- [Henry] Perhaps a cup of tea?
- Maybe?
- No. No. No.
Scotch, I'm thinking scotch.
Oh, this weather doth
murder sleep.
[thunder rumbles]
- Oh!
- Oh, shit.
Oh, my nerves.
Do not be afraid, my dear.
It is only nature
at her most dramatic.
Yes. Well, I like comedy.
It's kinda spooky.
- Hey.
- Hi.
[sighs deeply]
- Where's Jason?
- [scoffs]
He fell asleep.
- How rude.
- [snickers]
Well, even the randiest
of roosters
must nap occasionally.
- [scoffs]
- Oh, my darling, pie?
Oh, no. It's okay,
South Beach diet.
[thunder rumbles]
Well, we should all follow
Jason's lead
and turn in,
got a big day tomorrow.
I believe I would wait here
for nature's grand finale.
Ah! And I,
I shall keep you company.
[Elliot] Excellent.
You always are welcome.
[both chuckle]
[thunder rumbling]
[thunderclap]
All right, then.
That should do it.
No curtain call for me.
No.
[foreboding music]
[blows air]
[door latch clicks]
[door creaks]
[foreboding music]
[foreboding music continues]
- Did you miss me...
- [Thomas inhales deeply]
...my King?
- Hm?
- [Thomas sighs deeply]
[Liz moans]
[gasping]
Jesus!
Oh, my god.
[blows air]
[sighs]
Oh, my god.
[sighs deeply]
That was terrifying.
[sighs sharply]
[pants]
Hey.
Hey, Liz?
I just had
the craziest dream, Liz?
Liz?
Oh, god!
[thunder rumbles]
[door creaks open]
No, no!
No, no!
That's, that's not quite
the reaction that I was...
that I was expecting.
What?
- Boo!
- Oh! Jeez! What?
I don't know why you did that.
Why did you do that?
Oh, you look like
you'd seen a ghost,
and I just thought
I would help you out.
I just, I had the most...
bizarre dream.
- Yeah?
- [Thomas] Don't.
Sorry. Just don't...
No.
Why?
What's wrong?
Nothing.
[Liz] No.
Something's wrong.
It's that little slut Juliet,
isn't it?
Hm?
I see the way
you've been looking at her.
Look at her?
I don't look at her. I...
I mean, I look at her.
[Thomas]
But I'm just a grown man.
I do... that's what we do,
we look.
We admire.
[snickers]
But that's not all you do,
is it?
Um...
This is what you want.
What?
[Annabel] Or is it this?
Uh...
Or maybe this?
[screaming]
Oh, my god! Oh, my god! Penis.
Oh, go away, go away, go away.
Go away, go away, go away!
[gasps]
[thunder rumbles]
[groans]
[clicks tongue]
Oh, shit.
[groans]
[disembodied laughter]
[disembodied voices]
Macbeth!
Macbeth!
Kill thee!
[disembodied voices]
[disembodied voice]
Must do...
[ominous music]
[disembodied voices]
[disembodied voices]
Thou shall be Macbeth!
Thrice to thine,
and thrice to mine,
and thrice again
to make up nine.
Peace!
The charms...
[glass cracks, shatters]
No!
[disembodied voices]
Thou shall be Macbeth!
Ah! No, no!
No, no, no!
No, no, no!
No! No!
No! No!
Uh...
[Thomas] Oh, shit.
[sighs]
[gasps]
[sighs]
[pants, sighs]
[distant thud]
[clock ticking]
[water running]
[Thomas] Um...
[clears throat]
Did you, um...
Did you come into my room
last night?
You don't remember?
Uh, no.
[chuckles]
No, not, not clearly.
Well, if you can't remember,
then neither can I.
I've been thinking.
Um...
About how to take care
of our Alex situation?
What?
No.
[sighs]
Well then, what else...
[knife thuds, clatters]
...my King?
Well actually, it's,
it's on, um,
it's on that point. I, I...
You're weak.
- [inhales deeply]
- [Thomas] Uh...
You're weak just like he is.
Just like Macbeth.
Just perfect for the part.
[thumps]
[foreboding music]
Pathetic.
[squelching]
[cuckoos]
[foreboding music]
[knocking on door]
[knocking continues]
[door latch clicks]
So, we're all heading over
to start getting ready.
That includes you.
[Henry] Right?
Look, um...
I warned you about this.
It better not be any
of your bullshit.
I'm...
I'm just not feeling myself,
actually, so...
That's strange.
That's usually...
the only person
you have feelings for.
- [both laugh]
- [Henry] Right?
Yeah, I didn't sleep
last night, so...
Well, no one did.
But the show,
it's gotta go on, okay?
Unless you're too unwell
to perform.
No.
No, no. I...
You haven't noticed anything
unusual recently, have you?
Uh, just that, um...
just that everybody's
really upped their game.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And you don't think
that's strange?
Just the result
of all our hard work.
[clicks tongue]
Okay.
[Henry] Okay.
[Thomas scoffs]
And one last thing,
you don't, um...
you don't believe
in the haunted play idea...
do you?
Really?
Did you just ask me that?
- [Thomas] It's nothing.
- For god's sake.
It's just...
Oh, my god.
- So we're good, right?
- Yeah.
- [Henry] Yeah?
- Yeah, we're good.
Okay.
[groaning]
[grunts]
[exhales sharply]
[sniffles]
Holy shit.
Stars...
hide your fires.
[Thomas as Macbeth]
Let no light see
thy black and deep desires.
We shall be Macbeth.
Yeah.
See, I'm not, I'm not so sure.
Do not disappoint us.
Get thee, now hence.
And let sun ne'er rise again
without ambitions fated,
treasure tight,
within thy grasp.
Uh...
Mm.
[blows air]
Okay. I'm, okay.
[exhales sharply]
[pants]
- [thwacks]
- Come on.
[pants]
Show time.
[tense music]
[tense music continues]
[crackles]
[knocking on door]
Yup?
[door opens]
Can I come in?
Yeah, of course.
Oh, Thomas.
Sweetheart.
I was a little abrupt earlier.
I know I have been
an absolute mess.
[chuckles]
And too hard on you.
And I really don't want you
to carry any bad feelings
out onto the stage tonight,
okay?
Yeah, of course.
[smooches]
[chuckles]
Whoo!
- Feels good to get that out.
- Mm.
[Liz] Break a leg.
[door opens]
[door closes]
[knocks on door]
Yeah?
[door opens]
May I come in?
[suspenseful music]
Oh, Thomas, sweetheart.
That was a little abrupt
earlier.
I know I've been
an absolute mess.
And too hard on you.
[sighs]
And I really don't want you
to carry any bad feelings
onto the stage tonight, okay?
[smooches]
[chuckles]
Whoo!
Feels good to get that out.
[Liz] Break a leg.
[Liz sniffles]
What? What?
Something else?
[gasps]
Something else?
You were just here.
[Liz] I was?
Yes. You were.
[Liz] When?
Just now. Literally just now.
Just now.
[Thomas]
What the hell is going on?
What have we done, Liz?
Liz?
Something wicked
this way comes, my King.
Something wicked.
[ominous music]
Yeah.
it does.
[disembodied voices]
Archie?
Archie?
Yes, Henry.
Are these rolling set pieces
gonna work?
And did you set
the final light cues?
Did you check the taped marks,
go over the prop table...
[Archie] Yes, yes, yes.
And yes to the next three things
you're gonna ask me.
Henry, we've done this play
50 times.
- [hisses]
- [yelps]
Henry, my love.
What do you think?
Did you use a mirror
or just your intuition,
Madeline?
I thought it was very scary.
[hisses]
Well, yeah,
and maybe too much so.
We might have children
in the audience. We...
We have to be careful.
Oh, thank you for the note.
- Thank you.
- [Henry chuckles]
Mr. Henry. Mr. Henry.
I am coming now from town,
and am reporting to you
from Mr. George,
that we have
no more seats to sell.
Is good?
Is good?
[in French accent]
Is unbelievable!
[both laugh]
- Henry.
- Huh?
Sold out?
We're all sold out? Oh!
Sold out.
We are sold out!
[chuckles]
Is that unusual?
Oh, it never happens.
So exciting.
The feel of a packed theater
is absolutely thrilling.
Oh!
[Madeline] Sold out, everyone!
Sold out!
So great, isn't it?
[foreboding music]
Okay, places everyone, please.
- [Madeline] Okay, oh.
- Just, go, go, go.
Okay, witches, Jason, you ready?
And, curtain.
- [crowd applauds]
- [curtains clattering]
[Annabel] When shall we three
meet again?
In thunder, lightning,
or in rain?
When the hurly-burly's done,
when the battle's lost and won.
That will be ere the set of sun.
- Where the place?
- Upon the heath.
[Madeline] There to meet with...
Macbeth!
Oh, here we go.
Show number 51.
Two scenes, and I'm dead.
All right. Ready, Cue 11.
Cue 11, go.
[Elliot]
What bloody man is that?
He can report, as seemeth
by his plight of the revolt,
the newest state.
[male actor]
This is the Sergeant,
who like a good and hearty...
Where's Liz Beth?
- [Archie shushes]
- Tell me she's sober.
She's a professional,
don't worry.
Yeah, and she's also
an alcoholic.
And she's on in five.
- Where's Thomas?
- Ready, Cue 12.
Cue 12.
[Archie] Go.
[male actor]
The merciless Macdonwalds.
Worthy to be a rebel,
for to that,
the multiplying villainies
of nature
do swarm upon him
from the western isles,
of kerns and gallowglasses.
They made themselves air
into which they vanished.
Whilst I stood rapt
in the wonder of it,
came missives from the King,
who all hailed me...
Thane of Cawdor.
By which title before
these weird sisters saluted me,
and referred me to the coming on
of time, with...
"Hail, king that shalt be."
"Hail, king that shalt be!"
Is this...
a dagger which I see before me?
The handle toward my hand?
Come.
Let me clutch thee.
I have thee not,
and yet I see thee still.
[Alex] Art thou not...
Banquet scene
is coming up, Elliot.
Yes, of course. I'm ready.
Well, these quick changes
are gonna kill me.
Yeah, what this company needs
- is a few more actors.
- You know...
- Uh, where the hell are they?
- [chuckles]
Hey.
Try a couple of deep breaths,
my friend.
You have managed to awaken
an elderly man
from a very pleasant sleep.
Is there no bottom to the pit
that is your cruelty?
- [Nigel chuckles]
- You're welcome.
[both breathing heavily]
[Nigel] This looks right.
- Ready?
- Yeah.
[both growl]
Let's kill Thomas
- Ey!
- Let's, let's kill Thomas
- Let's kill Thomas now
- What
[both] Let's kill Thomas
Uh, let's, let's
- All right. Let's go.
- Okay.
[Nigel] Uh-uh!
- Troy?
- Shit.
What the hell are you wearing?
That's what I was just about
to ask you.
- Whoa, whoa, what the fu...
- No time, no time!
[Troy] Hey...
[both panting]
[clattering]
Uh, where the hell are they?
I don't know!
[Nigel]
This is getting freaking weird.
We're late already.
[knock on door]
[Juliet]
Henry is looking for you.
- No shit!
- No shit!
Okay, um...
It doesn't matter.
Just put something on.
- [hangers clattering]
- [Nigel groans]
You got it on backwards.
Raise that hanger right there.
[Nigel] Okay, okay.
[man 1] A light, a light!
[man 2] 'Tis he.
[lamp squeaking]
It will rain tonight.
[man 2] Let it come down!
- [man 1 grunt]
- [Thomas groans]
- [squelching]
- [thuds]
[choking]
[gasps]
- [thuds]
- [crowd gasps]
[applauds]
Get dressed later, come on.
Pig, pig.
[curtain rasping]
[suspenseful music]
- [clattering]
- [Henry] Goblets!
The pig!
Let's go. Go!
Ready, and set.
[thuds]
[both panting]
Best murder ever!
But what are you doing here?
You have a quick change
into the banquet scene!
[Henry] Go! Go, go, go!
[clattering]
- Archie! Archie, are we ready?
- [shushing]
Please tell me that we're ready.
And cue Banquet.
Go.
Ourself will mingle with society
and play the humble host.
Our hostess keeps her state,
but in best time,
we will require her welcome.
[all laughing]
- [Liz] Announce it for me.
- [Nigel and Troy panting]
[Liz] To all our friends.
- From my heart...
- Okay, okay.
speaks they are very welcome.
[all laughing]
- [Alex yells]
- [woman gasps]
Which of you have done this?
[all] What, my good Lord?
Thou can'st not say I did it.
Never shake
thy gory locks at me!
Gentlemen, rise.
His Highness is not well.
[Liz] Sit, worthy friends.
- Archie.
- [Liz] My lord is often...
Remember how you lit
Banquo's ghost tonight.
It's perfect.
- [Liz] Are you a man?
- [Alex] Aye.
And a bold one,
that dare look at that
which might appall the Devil!
Double, double time. Let's go!
- No.
- [Madeline] I'm not ready!
No, I... I look horrific.
I'm not ready.
No, come on.
We're supposed to look horrific.
- Let's go. Come on.
- [Madeline] Oh, jeez.
I'm not ready.
I'm just not ready.
Juliet, wait up!
[Annabel] I'm coming,
I'm coming.
[Madeline] Oh, well,
should we...
- [Annabel] Let's go, let's go.
- [Madeline] I'm a freight...
- [Annabel] Juliet!
- [Madeline] Freight train!
[Annabel] Come on, Madeline.
What are you doing?
[Madeline] What, wait,
where did she go?
[Annabel] Will you stop
fooling around?
Madeline, come on.
We need to hurry.
[indistinct chatter]
[Annabel] Wait, can you...
[groans]
Off the wall,
we're gonna miss our cue.
- [grunts]
- Let's go, let's go, let's go.
[Annabel] Come on, let's go.
Let's go.
We're almost there.
We're almost there.
[Annabel] That's weird.
We're back where we started.
We have to go. No, no, no.
We have to go.
We're gonna miss it,
we're gonna miss our scene.
[witches] Double, double toil
and trouble,
Fire burn, and cauldron bubble.
Eye of newt and toe of frog,
Wool of bat and tongue of dog.
- Liver of a blaspheming Jew!
- [cackling]
Gall of goat and slips of yew.
Finger of birth-strangled babe,
ditch delivered by a drab,
make the gruel thick and slab.
[witches cackling]
[witches] Double, double toil
and trouble.
Fire burn and cauldron bubble.
[Madeline]
Something's not right.
[Annabel] Come on,
you should calm down.
[Madeline] Where is the stage?
Oh...
How now,
you secret, black
and midnight hags?
What is't you do?
[witches] A deed without a name.
Pour in sow's blood,
that hath eaten her nine farrow,
grease that's sweaten
from the murderer's gibbet,
throw into the flame.
[ominous music]
Crap.
Henry.
What the hell is going on?
We didn't kill Banquo.
What are you talking about?
It was brilliant.
I mean,
it was very realistic, guys.
No, listen. We missed our scene.
We didn't kill Banquo.
Then who the hell did?
And where is he?
Archie, go find Thomas.
[witch 1]...of hemlock
digg'd i' the dark
[Annabel] No, it's...
[crowd cheering, applauding]
[crowd] Macbeth!
Macbeth!
- Macbeth!
- That's it.
It's too real. I'm done.
You play him, Henry.
[gags]
Jason, bucket!
What?
We're killing it out there.
[retching]
[Archie] Thomas.
We got a weird sit...
Thomas?
Thomas! Hey.
Hey, hey, Thomas!
Thomas.
Oh, my god.
Oh, my god. Oh, my god, shit!
Shit, shit, shit!
[distant thud]
There's knocking at the gate.
[distant thud]
[loud thump]
- Oh, come.
- [distant thud]
Come.
[chuckles]
[distant rumbling]
[inhales deeply]
What's done cannot be undone.
- [distant screaming]
- [vial shatters]
We're ready for you, my King.
[disembodied voice]
Ready for you, my King.
[light music]
[grandiose music]
Henry, we have a bit
of a situation here.
You're telling me?
Where is Alex?
Oh, thank god, there he is.
[Archie] Henry.
- Hey, Henry. Henry!
- Jason. Jason.
- Henry.
- [Henry] Cue his spot, now.
Thomas is dead.
[Thomas] Tomorrow...
and tomorrow.
And tomorrow.
What's going on?
He was really stabbed. For real.
Thomas is dead.
Not completely.
And all our yesterdays
have lighted fools
the way to dusty death.
Out.
Out brief candle.
I'm telling you, he is dead.
- Who's dead?
- Thomas.
And why the hell
is he playing my part?
Excellent question.
I'm telling you,
he is in his dressing room,
right now, dead.
[Madeline] Quiet, son.
You're frightening me.
It is a tale told by an idiot,
all sound and fury,
signifying nothing.
Show me.
[Archie] Come on.
[indistinct chatter]
[tense music]
[Henry] Oh, no.
[Troy] Oh, my god.
[Madeline] Oh, no.
Green room. Now.
[indistinct chatter]
- [Madeline] Oh, no!
- [Annabel] Jason!
[Madeline] Go quickly! Go!
What?
Is it time for the curtain call?
Not quite, Elliot.
- Thomas has been murdered.
- [Alex] He's dead.
[all whimper]
But, we have evidence
to the contrary.
- [door thuds]
- [all scream]
[Madeline] Oh!
- Oh!
- It's locked, we're trapped.
It's the curse.
What are you talking about?
We haven't done anything.
I'm afraid someone did.
Well, then someone better undo
this shit.
I don't know how.
I don't know how.
[marching footsteps]
[screams]
I pull in resolution,
and begin to doubt
the equivocation of the fiend
that lies like truth.
[Thomas as Macbeth]
Fear not,
till Birnam wood
do come to Dunsinane.
And now, a wood comes
toward Dunsinane!
[Elliot] There's no worry,
please, hurry.
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
Where's Liz Beth?
Wait.
Oh, my god, Henry.
She's still out there.
Liz!
[Alex] Liz!
[trumpets blowing]
[Elliot] Oh, what is that noise?
[man on speaker]
This way, my Lord!
The castle's gently rendered.
The tyrant's people
on both sides do fight.
The noble thanes do bravely
in the war...
Who's doing the play?
[gasps]
And why are they so damn good?
[horse neighs]
- [cannon fires]
- [all gasp]
[Henry] Was that real?
[swords clinking]
[Thomas] I will...
not yield!
[panting]
Of all men else...
I have avoided thee, Macduff.
My poor Elizabeth is in danger!
[stutters]
We need to help her.
And I shall assist you
in the rescue.
I served in the Queen's militia
as a young man.
Good. Great. What do we do?
- Battering ram!
- [Elliot] Yes!
- Yes.
- [Alex] Stand back!
[Alex grunts]
- [screams]
- [thuds]
[man] Off with his head!
[crowd cheering]
[cheering continues]
[crowd applauding]
- [electricity crackles]
- [thunder rumbles]
[crowd applauding, cheering]
[applauding, cheering continues]
[foreboding music]
[crowd applauding]
[somber music]
[crowd applauding, cheering]
[Madeline] What is...
what is happening?
Oh, god.
Uh, what?
- [distant thud]
- [all shriek]
- [all gasp]
- [Troy] What is it?
[all panting]
[Madeline] Close the door.
[Henry] Hello?
Hello?
You, you go ahead.
[Madeline] I'll wait here.
Good luck.
Oh, no! Oh!
Break a leg.
- [Elliot] Come.
- [whimpering]
You are safe with me, my love.
[Madeline sobs]
[suspenseful music]
[Annabel] Oh, no.
We need to grab something.
- Troy.
- Hm?
[Nigel] If we don't make it...
I love you.
We're gonna make it.
I hope.
[gasps]
[suspenseful music]
Liz Beth?
Liz Beth!
Where is she?
She was right here.
After her suicide.
Oh, my god.
She's gone, isn't she?
[Annabel sobbing]
You mean they're both...
dead?
Oh.
They were such...
wonderful actors.
[door creaking]
Perhaps they do live on...
- inside the play.
- [Annabel scoffs]
Do you really think
that's possible?
Oh, I hope so.
Hello? Who's there?
'Allo! 'Allo!
We are so sorry for the delay
we have been making.
We are the sisters Levesque.
Caretaker for Mr. George.
[Eloise] Uh, the snow
came very unexpected,
- and we are two days delayed.
- [Edna chuckles]
You make yourselves at home
though, eh?
- Ah, tres bien.
- Yeah.
Uh, Mr. George says
you are doing Mac...
- [Eloise screams]
- [Edna shrieks]
[Eloise] The Play Scottish.
Oh! Oh.
Uh, when will be
the opening, eh?
Yeah.
[suspenseful music]
[suspenseful music continues]
["Bump in the Night"
by Les Sampuo playing]
Kill her
With your alien lies
Kill her
With your expert disguise
Bump, bump, bump
Kill him
With your luscious lips
Kill him
With your swaying hips
Bump, bump, bump
Call the cops, call 911
Is nice, two is fun
How'd it get so out of hand
Hurry, hurry, hurry
Quicksand
Listen to
The city sirens howl
Night club
Hunters on the prowl
Bump, bump, bump
With hair
All wind-swept skunk
She meets
Apocalyptic cyberpunk
And they go bump, bump, bump
Bump in the night
Hearts are sinking
Awfully fast
Like olives
In a sweating glass
Bed time
The clock strikes twelve
Hurry, hurry, hurry
Schnau, schnau
There's nothing wrong
With bad intent
Unless of course
There's a consequence
How'd it get so out of hand
Bump, bump, bump
Bump, bump, bump
Bump, bump, bump
Bump, bump, bump
Bump, bump, bump
Bump, bump, bump
Bump, bump, bump
[man] Over 400 years ago,
William Shakespeare
wrote Macbeth,
the medieval story
of the Thane of Glamis
and his wife,
who are inspired
by witches' sorcery
to commit mayhem and murder
and to take the crown
of Scotland.
Since earliest times,
actors who have performed
Macbeth,
have thought the play to be...
cursed.
[thunder rumbling]
[disembodied scream]
[suspenseful music]
[suspenseful music continues]
[bus engine revving]
[brake squeaking]
[indistinct chatter]
Oh, dear.
It's so rural.
At least we are no longer
on a motor coach.
Oh.
Okay, that'll do.
Aw, it's so cute.
- [Annabel] Okay.
- I gotta see what he wants.
- Oh.
- Oh.
It's better than I thought.
[bird cawing]
[sighs]
Pretty quiet.
Yeah, we were supposed
to be met.
- I'll go look for the guy.
- Okay.
George?
[Archie] George?
You here?
[bird cawing]
[door squeaks, opens]
[Henry] Oh, my god.
Look at this place.
[foreboding music]
[light switch clicks]
[light music]
[Madeline] Look.
Now, this is a theater!
- [chuckles]
- A sight for sore eyes!
Yes.
[laughs]
Huh.
- [whistling]
- [Elliot] No, no, no.
- What?
- [Madeline] Angels of ministers
and grace defend us!
Angels of ministers
and grace defend us...
No, no. Young man.
[Elliot] You should never,
ever whistle in a theater.
Oh, please.
The only thing worse
is letting the ghost light
go out.
Ooh, what's the ghost light?
That...
is the ghost light.
And it must always
remain burning
on an empty stage.
[chuckles]
Or what?
It'll get dark.
How magnificent!
[Alex] This will be the place
of my greatest triumph.
Our collective triumph,
I believe.
Our company, our triumph.
[Thomas] Our burden.
[Alex clears throat, sniffles]
Tomorrow,
and tomorrow,
and tomorrow...
creeps in this petty pace
from day to day,
to the last...
[scoffs]
...syllable of recorded time.
And all our yesterdays,
are...
lighted fools...
the way to dusty...
death.
You are really...
starting to embody
this role, Alex.
Hmm?
You're really starting
to embody this role.
Ah, yeah, it did feel different,
didn't it?
- Didn't you feel it?
- [Alex] Yeah.
- I felt it.
- [Alex] Yeah.
But I would say that
the Scottish King himself,
could not have done better.
- [Alex] Oh, thank you.
- Oh, because he's dead?
[Elliot groans]
Pay no attention.
Every line, remembered.
No easy task.
- [Elliot] Well done.
- Thank you.
Welcome!
Welcome, everyone.
This is George Pitard, he...
he owns the place. Wow.
Well, we sometimes think
it does own us.
[all laugh]
What a charming old theater.
[George] Ah, merci beaucoup,
mademoiselle!
Oh.
[smooches]
Uh...
my grandfather, he build it.
[George] We close for two years,
but decided to open again
now that the tourism
is picking up.
- For the leaf peepers.
- [chuckles]
Oh, and you are doing
the play Mac...
[blabbers]
Oh, The Play Scottish, eh?
Perfect, no?
Right where we left it off.
I'm guessing it was...
It was very popular.
Uh...
Not so much.
- [trunk clatters]
- [men grunting]
What the hell does Madeline keep
in this thing?
An ex-husband.
[bird caws]
Do you have any bars?
[Troy sighs deeply]
Nope. No bars.
Wi-Fi?
This look like the kind of place
that has Wi-Fi to you?
You've got to be kidding me.
Even Appalachia had Wi-Fi.
[Nigel] I'm waiting
for a callback.
You've been waiting
for that call back
as long as I've known you.
Ouch.
[thuds]
[Henry] You know, Madeline,
I've been thinking,
this theater is...
is so intimate.
It's beautiful.
Maybe you should tone down
your third witch just,
just a little here.
What... what do you mean?
Well...
this is Shakespeare, it's...
It's not Vaudeville.
[chuckles]
Vaudeville?
I received spectacular reviews
for my first witch in London.
With Mr. Derek Jacobi.
I remember,
but the witches should be...
malevolent.
Not...
hysterical.
Hysterical?
[Madeline] Shall I show you
the difference
between malevolent
and hysterical?
Oh, boy.
I am done with your insults
and lack of talent.
Now that was malevolent
and this is hysterical.
Macbeth!
Macbeth!
[Madeline] Macbeth! Macbeth!
Macbeth!
Macbeth!
- Macbeth! Macbeth!
- [Annabel] Hey, what's going on?
[Madeline] Macbeth!
- That didn't go so well.
- [Madeline] Macbeth!
- Uh, Archie.
- [Madeline] Macbeth!
Won't you, uh...
go and get her, make her run
around the theater to undo it.
Run?
That's gonna take a while.
[Henry] Well, carry her
if you have to.
All right.
Wait, undo what?
The curse.
Are you serious?
We are performing the Bard's...
greatest
and most dangerous play.
- You mean, Mac...
- No, no. Just stop.
You cannot say
the name of The Scottish Play
in the theater
unless it is part
of the performance.
[Henry] It unleashes
the witch's evil magic.
The name is cursed.
The play... is cursed.
[Madeline] Put me down,
you little shithead!
Oh, god. Whoever let you
into the theater...
And... and everyone
believes that?
Oh, everyone knows that.
Apparently,
in some ancient production,
some jealous actor
killed the star
with a real knife
in the murder scene.
And in doing so,
was doomed to play the part
for all eternity.
And even the greatest role
created for the stage
can be tedious
after a century or two.
[Madeline] Goddamn it,
just put me down!
Put me down, you Neanderthal!
Just put me down!
- [Archie grunts]
- [thuds]
- [groans]
- [Archie] It's done.
[Henry] All the way around?
She swore, she spit?
I spit, she swore.
You heard her.
Uh, but...
she did not beg to be readmitted
to the troupe.
You know the rules, Madeline.
Beg!
But I am not sorry.
You don't have to be sorry,
but you do have to beg.
[Elliot]
Now, my buttery biscuit.
You don't want some unfortunate,
unforeseen circumstance
to be on your conscience,
do you?
[sighs]
Oh, please, my liege, my Lord.
Uh, may, I, poor maid that I am,
know again
the warmth of your radiance
and rest beneath
the towering branches
of your beautiful cherry...
Okay, okay, Madeline.
Very nice. Very nice.
- Really, was it?
- [Henry] Yes, it was.
Now, tell me the truth.
- Was it good?
- [Henry] No, it was beautiful.
- [Henry] It was very nice.
- Thank you.
[Henry] Welcome back.
Henry...
I'm so happy to be back.
Thank you.
So, the kitchen is stocked,
and the Levesque sisters
soon will be here.
They drive the car
from Montreal, eh?
Do they know the place well?
Oh, very well.
They have come many seasons.
They can be help for you
with costumes,
should that be
the need you have.
They were excited
when I told them
we were to make things go again.
[cuckoos]
[foreboding music]
Sorry I was a dick out there.
I guess...
[inhales deeply]
[chuckles]
...I don't quite know how to be.
Like I do?
How's your room?
[Troy] Uh, it's good.
Yours?
It's nice.
You're, um...
You're welcome to come visit.
Uh, we could run lines or...
I think...
that might make it harder
to get to the...
just friends stage.
I know.
I know.
I just, uh...
[sighs deeply]
I just miss you, though.
Me, too.
[inhales deeply]
Tomorrow...
and tomorrow,
and tomorrow...
creeps in this petty pace,
from day...
to day,
until the last syllable
of recorded time.
And all our yesterdays
have lighted fools
the way to dusty death.
A... oh, fuck...
[chuckles]
[sucks teeth]
Well, I should be
playing Macbeth.
Macbeth.
Macbeth.
Macbeth!
Macbeth!
[birds flutter]
[ominous music]
You are so naughty.
[Liz clicks tongue]
[Thomas] Oh, hello.
[Liz] I knew
I would find you here.
- [Thomas] And so you did.
- [Liz] Yeah.
[Thomas] Hmm.
[smooching]
God.
I don't know how many,
how many more of your
husband's performances
I can endure.
[Liz chuckles]
Well just imagine
the performances
that I have to endure.
Oh, god. No, thanks.
- That's horrifying.
- [Liz laughs]
Don't worry, sweetheart.
You'll play the Scottish king...
- [Thomas] Yeah?
- ...soon enough.
- [Liz] Mm-hm.
- Do you mean Macbeth?
[Liz gasps]
Yeah.
Yes.
You will, one day,
be the greatest...
[Thomas] Mm-hm.
- ...Macbeth!
- [gasps]
Oh!
Ever.
- Come on.
- Oh.
We gotta go.
- Before your husband sees us.
- Okay.
- Tonight?
- Yeah.
- [Thomas] Yeah?
- Before his Xanax kicks in.
[Thomas chuckles]
[Thomas] What was it
that you saw in him, anyway?
- [Liz laughs]
- [Thomas] Was it the moustache?
[crackles]
I'll be loving you
Always
[Annabel] Troy.
Look behind you.
We've been dancing to this...
- So cute.
- ...since before Annabel
- was born.
- [Elliot sighs deeply]
I remember as if
it were only yesterday.
[Madeline chuckles]
My little radish.
[both chuckling]
[indistinct chatter]
Okay, does this look good?
- I think so, I think we're done.
- Mm-hm.
All right, everyone.
Linguini al pomodoro e polpetto
for 11.
- [Annabel] Yay!
- Dinner is served.
[Archie] Thank, god.
I'm starving.
Oh, my god.
This looks fabulous.
[Nigel] Thanks.
You've always liked my cooking.
[Annabel] Oh, my gosh,
it smells so good.
I am starving.
- [Alex chuckles]
- This is nice.
It'd be fun to run
a place like this, huh?
Hmm, and your job would be
refilling the glasses?
[Liz] Someone has to pour.
Yes, and someone has to drink.
[utensils clinking]
Did I ever tell you about
my connection to Top Gun?
[Annabel] No.
Oh, god.
If I have to listen to this
threadbare story one more time,
- I'll hang myself.
- [chuckles]
Come on, I had over
four callbacks for that movie.
- Really?
- Mm.
When I met with Tony Scott,
he assured me I had the part.
Wait, of Maverick?
Hm?
The Tom Cruise part?
No, no. Duck, the guy who died.
[chuckles]
[Archie] Goose. Mm.
The character was Goose.
Duck, duck, goose. Whatever.
I have much better hair
than Anthony Edwards.
Really, good hair
can be very important.
[Alex] Yes, very.
- [door creaks open]
- [Annabel] Oh.
- [all gasp]
- [Nigel] What was that?
[Edna] 'Allo, 'allo!
The wind is picking up, eh?
[Eloise] We are
the sisters Levesque.
Your caretakers.
We are a little late, sorry.
Yeah, George said
you'd be coming.
- Welcome.
- I am Eloise.
- Hi.
- And this is Edna.
[Edna] So nice
to be meeting all of you.
[Edna chuckles]
Oh, I see someone knows
the cooking?
Yeah, there's plenty for you.
[Eloise] Oh, thanks to you.
Maybe we should be the actors
and you the cooks, eh?
[all laugh]
I don't think it's funny.
It's not funny to me.
[wolf howls]
- Good night.
- [Madeline] Bonsoir, my darling.
Oh, there you are, honey buns.
I've been looking
all over for ya.
Watcha doin'?
- Mmm.
- Oh, oh.
Oh, alone time again.
Got it. Got it.
Well, I'm feeling kinda bushed,
thinking about turning in.
- How about you?
- In a bit.
- Okay.
- Okay.
Don't be too long,
if you know what I mean.
I know what you mean.
[chuckles]
Okay, sweetie.
Okay.
[sighs deeply]
[wings fluttering]
[ominous music]
[owl hooting]
[clock ticking]
[thunder crackles]
Whoa.
This storm makes me horny.
Hey, honey. Honey?
I just had an idea.
How about we do a little, uh,
doctor-patient play?
[Alex] It's been a while
since your last checkup.
Okay, great idea.
[playful music]
I put your Xanax on the table.
Already took it.
That's why we only have
a short window, my sweet.
I can't wait.
[Alex] Me neither!
[Liz] I'm just taking off
my face, okay?
Don't take off too much.
I like it the way it is.
Well you know,
so much of the thrill
is in the anticipation.
Yes, maybe for you.
[chuckles]
Ah.
[playful music]
Dr. Osgood is back!
- [thunder rumbles]
- [chuckles]
[grunts]
[exhales deeply]
[yawns]
[Alex] Honey!
What's takin' so long?
My appointments are backing up.
[gasps]
[blows air]
- [thunder rumbles]
- Ah!
[panting]
- [knocks on door]
- [Nigel] Troy, Troy, please.
Please, please, please.
Please, can I come in?
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
[door closes]
[Alex snoring]
[in soft voice]
I'm ready.
[Alex snores]
[ominous music]
[thunder rumbles]
- [disembodied voice] Thou...
- Jesus!
...shall be Macbeth!
[thunder rumbles]
Oh, my god.
[chuckles]
Jesus.
[Thomas sighs deeply]
It's you.
[door closes]
And who were you expecting?
You, of course.
It's just, the lightning...
startled me.
[smooching]
[Liz giggles]
Does this startle you?
[both chuckle]
What's wrong?
- You seem tense.
- No, I'm not.
I'm not. I'm...
Yeah. I am, actually.
I am.
Because I don't think
I can work for that amateur
for one more day.
- He's Dr. Osgood, M.D.
- Mm.
He has saved thousands of lives
over 17 glorious years.
Yeah, yeah.
What a genius.
You know, being a soap star,
doesn't make you an actor.
It does make you rich, though.
Well, maybe he should've spent
some of that money
on drama classes.
Hmm.
And what do you suggest
as an alternative?
Mmm, an accident?
[chuckles]
I love your dirty mind.
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
Well, the stage can be
a very unpredictable
and dangerous place.
- Mm-hmm, yes.
- Mm-hm?
Yes, it can.
[both moaning]
[ominous music]
[foreboding music]
[Henry] Thomas,
you want to go back
to the beginning
of Banquo's last scene?
No, it's okay. I'll start here.
[Henry] Okay.
- [Archie] I figure we put...
- Thou hast it now.
- [Thomas scoffs]
- ...a show on his entrance.
[Archie] We could go
with blue, red...
King, Cawdor, Glamis,
- all as the weird women...
- Henry!
I'm ready for a run through
of the dagger scene.
[Henry] Uh, right.
Uh, that's a good place
to start.
[scoffs]
Of course, I know my part.
[scoffs]
Jeez.
- [Alex clears throat]
- Is he going deaf or just...
playing dumb?
He's not playing.
[Henry] Jason.
Jason!
Jason!
Focus, Jason.
Dagger scene.
[Henry] You better know
your lines, Annabel.
Yup.
Oh, Archie.
Uh, we're gonna need you to play
the second witch.
Uh, I thought Nigel
was doing that?
No, he's having trouble making
his makeup change into Malcolm.
Okay.
- [smooching]
- [Henry] Jason!
- Mm. Hold that thought.
- [Annabel chuckles]
Yeah, sorry.
[Jason groans]
[Henry] Jason! Goddamn it!
Where's the dagger?
- [Alex vocalizing]
- Thank you.
[Alex clears throat]
[Henry] Little higher, please.
Good.
Alex, just stand there
and reach for it.
Okay, okay, you're...
Reach for it, but do not take
- possession of it. Remember?
- Oh.
- Mm-hm, mm-hm. Yeah, yeah.
- [Henry] Okay?
It's a vision.
All right? A haunted dagger.
Okay? Theatrical illusion.
[Henry] Don't touch it.
Don't touch it.
- Right.
- [Henry] Right?
- Theatrical illusion.
- Okay. Yeah, yeah, of course.
[chuckling]
Sorry, sorry.
It's just...
Okay.
- [clears throat]
- [Alex inhales deeply]
Is this a dagger,
which I see before me,
handle, toward my hand?
- [Jason groans]
- [Annabel chuckles]
Come, come, let me clutch thee.
[Alex] I have thee not,
and yet...
I have thee not, and...
[grunts]
Hey, Henry.
- Henry. Sorry, sorry
- [Henry] Hm?
[Alex] I just...
[chuckles]
[Alex] I have an idea.
[clears throat]
Now, I know you said
I shouldn't touch it,
but, but...
how about,
how about we mix it up a little
and I do, actually,
grab the knife.
- [Henry] No, Alex.
- Huh?
You don't...
mix up William Shakespeare,
Alex.
You can't grab
the phantom knife.
It's just...
[sighs]
It's so tempting to have a prop
to work with, ya know?
[Thomas] Yeah.
Especially when you've got
so little talent to work with.
What did he say?
I said,
"Especially when you've got
so little talent to work with."
Well, how about I...
[clears throat]
How about I fire you?
And then you have no job
to work with.
How about them apples?
Stop! Stop it!
Cut the crap, you two!
You understand me?
- Now, kiss and make up.
- Huh?
Fine.
I use a lot of tongue.
[light music]
[Henry] Uh, Thomas?
You can give them the cue.
- [Thomas] Yeah?
- [Henry] Yup.
Um...
It will rain tonight.
Let it come then!
[all screaming, grunting]
All right, all right, all right!
All right. Enough. God, stop.
I thought we were rehearsing.
Just take it easy. Jesus.
- It just feels so right.
- Oh, really?
- Yeah.
- You want it to be convincing.
- Right?
- Uh...
Well, a little more butch,
certainly.
But, uh, just, why don't you
save your testosterone
for tomorrow night, okay, guys?
Let's, uh, let's do it again.
Hello?
[girl] Hi, um...
do you know where I sign up
for the yoga retreat?
Oh, we, uh...
Uh, that's not here.
[Henry] This is the theater.
Riverside Resort, right?
I saw it on Trip Advisor.
Oh, my goodness.
[Eloise] That was three years
gone ago.
Mr. George, he thought
it could be a money maker,
but... nothing.
- Oh.
- Are you, um...
are you hiking
the Appalachian Trail
or something?
Yeah, and I scheduled
my entire hike
around this retreat, so.
Oh, god.
[Edna] Oh, my goodness.
[chuckles]
Who is this I am seeing now?
Edna, she came
for the yoga retreat.
[both chuckle]
[Edna] Eloise and I
cannot even do
the downward canine, I'm afraid.
[both laughing]
Oh, young lady,
what is your name?
- Juliet.
- Oh, Juliet.
Beautiful name.
- It's French.
- Mm.
Oh, you stay
for refreshment, Juliet?
Uh, no, no, I'm really fine.
Yeah.
Why not? Stay, stay with us.
I don't want to impose.
It's not an imposition.
Really.
[chuckles]
[suspenseful music]
[water sloshing]
Oh, at last!
Nap time!
Die, Duncan!
[both grunt]
[thuds]
[approaching footsteps]
Fainting.
[thuds]
Oh, Elliot. Must you?
[Madeline and Elliot laugh]
[Elliot] Haven't lost my touch
have I, darling?
Impressive.
A method taught to me
by Sir Lawrence Olivier's
stunt double himself.
What happened to Nigel?
[sighs]
The sight of blood.
Does it every time.
But it's not real blood.
[Madeline] Oh, well!
Then it must have been
your performance, dear.
[Elliot] Oh. Thank you.
Only one small problem, really.
What's up?
I cannot get up.
[scoffs]
Don't worry, I got you.
[clearing throat]
Uh, crown, please.
[clears throat]
Thank you.
[sighs]
[Henry] Let's have a look
at our king then, huh?
Alex.
It's amazing!
It doesn't make me look, uh...
No, you look absolutely regal.
- I do?
- [Henry clicks tongue]
Huh.
[clears throat]
I guess I do, don't I?
Well...
[scoffs]
[clearing throat]
Uh, your king
is eternally grateful.
- [both] Oh.
- As...
we all are.
We love the show people.
[all laugh]
[Edna and Eloise]
Beautiful, beautiful.
Yes, right?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, pull it out.
Till Birnam Wood comes
to Dunsinane.
- No! Save it!
- Huh?
Okay, it's time for the witches
to meet the Scottish King.
Archie, why don't you go
get your wig?
- [Archie] Got it.
- [Thomas] What?
- Hang on.
- [Archie] Mm-hm.
Sorry. I thought this was just
a straight run through?
We've got our first performance
tomorrow night.
No, we have to run
Archie's lines, so.
I just wanted to say thanks
before heading out.
[Alex] Henry.
- Hmm.
- Why don't we, uh...
ask this young lady
if she'd like
to play the second which?
I have this covered.
Me? I, I, I really need
to get going.
No. No, actually, I...
I think that could work.
Honestly, it probably
would be better
to have a woman with us,
at the cauldron.
No offense, Archie.
None taken.
Have you ever acted before?
A little in high school.
Well you'll fit
right in here, then.
Performing Shakespeare
can be thrilling.
You know, we did do
some Shakespeare, actually.
Ans there is, of course,
a modest stipend.
Most modest, I assure you.
[chuckles]
[sighs]
Well, it would be nice
to sleep in a bed for a change.
[Juliet sighs]
I just... I don't want
to embarrass you.
Oh, dear,
we are able to embarrass
ourselves quite capably
without additional help.
- [chuckles]
- [Madeline] Oh, Elliot.
[ominous music]
This...
- is our dressing room.
- [Juliet chuckles]
And here,
here is our makeup.
[Juliet] Mm-hmm.
So much fun, isn't it?
[all laugh]
[Madeline] Here are
our costumes.
- [Juliet] Oh, wow.
- [Annabel] Ooh.
And here, my darling,
is your robe!
- [Juliet] Wow.
- Oh, yes.
They really help us
get into character, you see.
- Wow.
- Even in rehearsals.
It looks amazing.
It's just like playing dress up
when we were little, right?
[all chuckle]
[Madeline] And to get
to stage right,
we go this way.
Be careful, my darling,
watch your step.
Oh, here are our props.
Follow me.
The flooring is a bit uneven.
[chuckles]
Watch your step,
watch your step.
[electricity crackling]
[Madeline] Oh. Oh, yes.
Old theater, old wiring.
You'll get used to it.
I'm sure.
[Annabel] So, Juliet,
we go under the stage,
and then we pop up
on the other side.
[chuckles]
[Annabel] It's so cool.
Juliet.
[foreboding music]
[Thomas moaning]
It was brilliant.
[Alex]And all our yesterdays...
have lighted fools
the way to dusty death.
Out, out, brief candle!
[electricity crackles]
Very funny.
Turn the lights back on.
Jason?
Turn the lights on, please.
I'm rehearsing here.
[disembodied voice]
Thomas?
Is that you?
Jason?
[foreboding music]
Hello?
[disembodied laughter]
Anybody there?
[suspenseful music]
- [Alex screaming]
- [clanks]
- [grunting]
- [metal clattering]
Help!
Alex is hurt,
I don't know what happened!
- Hurt? What?
- What?
- [Henry] Oh, no.
- [Archie] Nobody panic.
Nobody panic.
[indistinct chatter]
- [Henry] Alex.
- [women gasp]
- Alex.
- [tapping]
Hey, wake up, man!
- Alex.
- [Liz] Alex?
- Alex.
- [Alex] Mm?
- Can you hear me?
- Liz Beth.
- Is that you?
- [Liz] Yes.
I, I, can hear you, but I...
I can't see you.
[Liz] What happened?
[Alex] I, I don't know.
I heard something, and...
- And then everything went black.
- [Madeline gasps]
The curse!
Oh, god.
What curse?
[Alex] I'm fine.
Uh, let me... let me sit up.
[grunts]
Let me sit up, and...
and gather my thoughts.
Well, that should be
quite a harvest.
- [Henry] Alex.
- Hm?
[Henry] You sure
you're all right?
[blows raspberries]
[Alex] Of course, I'm all right.
I'm better than all right.
- Here, help me up.
- [Madeline gasps]
[grunting]
[sighs]
After a near-death experience,
one sees one's purpose
in a new and crystalline light.
I am ready to give
the Scottish King my all.
[inhales deeply, clears throat]
Tomorrow, and...
Uh...
[sighs]
Line?
- Uh, "Tomorrow."
- Ah!
Yes, that's right.
[chuckles]
Tomorrow, and tomorrow,
and, uh...
- Uh, line?
- [all] "Tomorrow."
[chuckles]
Oh, yes.
How could I forget.
[chuckles]
Uh...
[sighs]
Oh, it's right there.
Just over the rainbow,
my darling.
Oh, dear! Oh, dear.
I'm still a little high,
but I'm fine.
- I'm all right. I'm fine.
- [Madeline] I say bravo!
- [Elliot] Courage!
- I say bravo!
- [Elliot] Courage!
- [Alex] I'm okay.
- [all clapping]
- [Elliot] Bravo!
[Alex] Okay. Yes, done. Okay.
All right, Thomas.
Looks like you're gonna have
to play The Scottish King,
and I'll do Banquo.
As you wish, my Lord.
Cut the crap.
You know, I do not know
how Alex got whacked,
but he did.
And now, you're our only choice.
I'm ready.
You know, you might be
a good actor,
but you're a consummate asshole.
The only good thing about this,
is that we get to cut
your head off in the last scene.
Thanks for your support, Henry.
[ominous music]
[water sloshing]
[gasps]
[suspenseful music]
[gasping]
Where is the Thane of Cawdor?
We coursed him at the heels,
but he rides well.
See, see our honored hostess.
[Liz shrieks]
Out!
Damn spot.
[panting]
Uh, wrong scene?
That's Act Five.
Act Five.
[foreboding music]
[Liz sighs deeply]
Look at my hands.
They're lovely hands.
Yeah. They don't show
your age at all.
I just need a little help
washing the blood off.
Sorry.
[chuckles]
Guess it's happy hour
already, huh?
- Come here. Are you okay?
- Yeah.
[groans]
I'm, I'm realizing, that...
how upsetting it must have been
to see Alex get hurt.
[panting]
Henry, I need you to help me
wash this blood off of my hands.
You know I love
the method acting, Liz.
But there is no blood,
in reality, there's...
- there's no blood.
- [Liz panting]
[breathing heavily]
- No?
- No.
No, no blood.
- But, no...
- No!
But very, very, convincing.
I mean, that...
that's some real conviction.
Like...
Crazy ass conviction.
[Henry and Liz laughing]
[Henry] Oh, that's...
[Liz] Uh, there is no blood.
I see that now.
There's no blood.
There's no blood.
- All right. Okay.
- Okay?
- Okay.
- No, no, no.
Let's give us a start
from the top.
- Let's go back to the top.
- Okay.
- Come on, dear.
- [Liz] Okay.
- Okay.
- Okay.
- No, no, no. Come on.
- [Liz] Oh.
Fresh start.
Very good.
- [Liz] Whoo!
- [Alex] All right?
[Liz laughing]
- [Nigel] You're like so in it.
- [Liz laughs]
- [Troy] Got me.
- [Nigel] Wow.
I thought I saw it, you know?
[Liz] Okay.
[suspenseful music]
[in soft voice]
I think maybe it's time to start
thinking about you
playing Lady Macbeth.
- Okay.
- From the "Thane of Cawdor."
[foreboding music]
So...
seems I will be Macbeth.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, it does seem that way,
doesn't it?
You know, I dreamed it
last night.
It's probably a prophecy.
It's not a prophecy
if you make it happen, Thomas.
Seriously?
[Thomas] I... I had nothing
to do with that.
You don't think I'd actually try
and kill him?
Well, you did say
that there would be an accident.
[Liz] You know how
the play goes.
We murder the king.
Okay, well.
Alex is on permanent bed rest
now, so...
all's well that ends well.
Oh, maybe for you.
- [Thomas] Hm?
- You know.
Maybe for you.
Why don't you man up?
- Huh?
- Hm?
Why don't you man up?
[Thomas chuckles]
Come to my woman's breast.
Yeah, all right.
Okay, okay, Liz.
You're scaring, scaring...
you're scaring me.
Enough with
the Lady Macbeth shit, okay?
Maybe everything ends well
for you,
but it doesn't end well for me,
it never does.
[ominous music]
[Alex] Is this...
a dagger which I see before me?
The handle toward my hand?
Come...
let me clutch thee.
I have thee not, and...
yet I see thee still.
Art thou not, fatal vision,
sensible to feeling as to sight?
Or art thou
but a dagger of the mind?
A false creation,
proceeding...
from the heat-oppressed brain.
[clapping]
[Elliot] Bravo!
- Bravo! Spectacular!
- [all clapping]
[Elliot] Bravo!
You know, I,
I kinda felt that, Henry.
- We all did, Alex.
- Oh.
Oh, well done...
my King!
What happened?
Alex is recovered.
More than recovered, actually.
Cured.
He just got some crazy-assed
kind of theatrical penicillin.
No, no, no.
No. That can't be.
That can't be.
We...
We should be sensitive
to his injury.
Life's but a walking shadow,
a poor player that...
- struts.
- And our eyes do not deceive us.
I, for one, am willing
to call it a miracle
and leave it at that.
It is a tale...
told by an idiot.
Full of sound and fury,
signifying...
nothing.
[somber music]
- What happened?
- Don't ask.
The weird sisters
Hand in hand
Posters of the sea and land
Thus do go about, about
Thrice to thine
And thrice to mine
And thrice again
To makeup nine
Peace
The charm's wound up
So foul and fair a day,
I have not seen.
How far is't call'd to Forres?
[Alex] What are these...
so wild and withered
in their attire,
they look not like
th' inhabitants o' th' Earth.
Speak if you can.
What are you?
[Juliet] All hail, Macbeth.
Hail to thee, Thane of Glamis.
All hail, Macbeth.
Hail to thee, thane of Cawdor.
All hail, Macbeth,
that shalt be king, hereafter.
Fantastic.
That was...
- spectacular!
- You think so?
Everybody, take five minutes.
Let's do the whole scene again.
Alex, come here, come here,
I want to talk to you.
I got a great idea.
- [Alex] Okay.
- [indistinct chatter]
- [Thomas sighs]
- He's good.
What?
- He's very good.
- Yeah, no, I heard you.
He's still an imbecile.
I mean, idiot savants
can play Mozart.
"All hail Macbeth."
[mutters]
I can't take it anymore.
You had your chance.
[somber music]
[birds caw]
Alex!
Alex!
[Alex] Huh?
[Thomas] I've been...
I've been looking for you.
What?
I just... I wanted to apologize,
for being so rough
on you before.
[Alex] Ha! That's a first.
[canoe clattering]
[Thomas] Let me give you a hand.
[both pant]
[Thomas] You know...
[clears throat]
I have to say that was some...
wonderful acting, back in there.
[scoffs]
And that surprises you?
No.
No, just, um...
I'm wondering
where it came from, really.
[Alex] Well, you know I, uh...
I feel it in here, and in here.
Yeah, I think
I was born to play Mac...
Uh-uh.
[blabbers]
- Scottish King.
- [Alex chuckles]
- [Alex] Yes, yes, of course.
- Yeah.
That crazy Scottish King.
[chuckles]
[Alex] Yeah, you know,
I think this is gonna be
my best performance.
I don't know, it's like he's...
he's inside of me.
It's like, uh...
next stop, Broadway.
[snickers]
Oh, whoa!
- [groans]
- [clatters]
- [Thomas grunts]
- [water splashes]
[playful music]
Jeez. You okay?
[yells]
[grunting]
Kill her
With your alien lies
Kill her
With your expert disguise
Bump, bump, bump
Kill him
With your luscious lips
Kill him
With your swaying hips
Bump, bump, bump
Is it done, then?
What do you think?
I think...
that a real man
carries out his intentions.
And that he takes
what he knows can be his.
Listen to
The city sirens howl
That's what I think.
Hunters on the prowl
Bump, bump, bump
With hair
All wind-swept skunk
She meets
Apocalyptic cyberpunk
And they go bump, bump, bump
Bump in the night
Hearts are sinking
Awfully fast
Like olives
In a sweating glass
Bed time
The clock strikes twelve
Hurry, hurry, hurry
Schnau, schnau
[screaming]
[gasps, sighs]
Ah, there you are.
We're ready for you to finish up
our run through.
I know you know the part,
but I...
[Henry] You feeling all right?
[sniffles]
I've been feeling a bit odd.
[snickers]
Um, might I suggest, uh...
maybe a lighter touch
with the gin?
Thomas and I set off the curse.
Liz...
there's no curse.
How do you know that, though?
How can you be sure?
[Henry] Trust me.
The idea of it...
helps bring the play's
sorcery to life. That's...
That's all, it's...
[Liz] Hmm.
Okay. So, maybe
we're just all...
ench... enchanted...
enchanted by the possibility.
Exactly.
Great acting demands...
surrender to the imaginary.
And you are a great actress.
[chuckles]
Thank you.
[Liz chuckles]
So, you'll come back inside?
- All right?
- Okay. Yeah.
Yes. All right.
- [both chuckle]
- [Liz] Sure.
[sniffles]
[gasps]
[sniffles]
[sobs, sniffles]
[sighs]
[suspenseful music]
[thunder rumbles]
[rain pattering]
[groans]
Oh!
[thunder rumbles]
[ominous music]
[laughing]
[Annabel] Oh, Jason!
[giggling]
[ominous music]
- [thunder crashing]
- [Alex snoring]
[snoring continues]
[thunder rumbles]
[Alex snoring loudly]
[Liz grunting]
- [disembodied voice]
- [Liz gasps]
[disembodied voice]
Kill him.
[electricity crackles]
[disembodied voice]
This thou must do!
[Alex coughing]
[gasps]
Oh!
You wicked girl.
You know how I like
a little rough trade.
That was fun.
[chuckles]
Do it again. Do it again.
- No. No.
- [Alex] Huh?
What? Why not?
Honey, come on.
Put the pillow on my face.
[Alex] Tank it in.
Hold it down.
Come on, come on! No?
[disembodied voice]
Unsex me.
What? What is it? What?
[disembodied voice]
Something wicked this way comes.
[disembodied laughter]
Are you okay?
[Liz snickering]
- [disembodied cackle]
- [Liz snickering]
[thunder rumbles]
[disembodied voices]
[thunder rumbles]
[disembodied voices]
[Troy] Hello? Hello?
Did you hear something?
Apparently, we all did.
I heard... I heard voices.
It's just the wind.
- [doors slams]
- [all scream]
[gasps]
The wind?
- Uh-huh.
- [Henry] Perhaps a cup of tea?
- Maybe?
- No. No. No.
Scotch, I'm thinking scotch.
Oh, this weather doth
murder sleep.
[thunder rumbles]
- Oh!
- Oh, shit.
Oh, my nerves.
Do not be afraid, my dear.
It is only nature
at her most dramatic.
Yes. Well, I like comedy.
It's kinda spooky.
- Hey.
- Hi.
[sighs deeply]
- Where's Jason?
- [scoffs]
He fell asleep.
- How rude.
- [snickers]
Well, even the randiest
of roosters
must nap occasionally.
- [scoffs]
- Oh, my darling, pie?
Oh, no. It's okay,
South Beach diet.
[thunder rumbles]
Well, we should all follow
Jason's lead
and turn in,
got a big day tomorrow.
I believe I would wait here
for nature's grand finale.
Ah! And I,
I shall keep you company.
[Elliot] Excellent.
You always are welcome.
[both chuckle]
[thunder rumbling]
[thunderclap]
All right, then.
That should do it.
No curtain call for me.
No.
[foreboding music]
[blows air]
[door latch clicks]
[door creaks]
[foreboding music]
[foreboding music continues]
- Did you miss me...
- [Thomas inhales deeply]
...my King?
- Hm?
- [Thomas sighs deeply]
[Liz moans]
[gasping]
Jesus!
Oh, my god.
[blows air]
[sighs]
Oh, my god.
[sighs deeply]
That was terrifying.
[sighs sharply]
[pants]
Hey.
Hey, Liz?
I just had
the craziest dream, Liz?
Liz?
Oh, god!
[thunder rumbles]
[door creaks open]
No, no!
No, no!
That's, that's not quite
the reaction that I was...
that I was expecting.
What?
- Boo!
- Oh! Jeez! What?
I don't know why you did that.
Why did you do that?
Oh, you look like
you'd seen a ghost,
and I just thought
I would help you out.
I just, I had the most...
bizarre dream.
- Yeah?
- [Thomas] Don't.
Sorry. Just don't...
No.
Why?
What's wrong?
Nothing.
[Liz] No.
Something's wrong.
It's that little slut Juliet,
isn't it?
Hm?
I see the way
you've been looking at her.
Look at her?
I don't look at her. I...
I mean, I look at her.
[Thomas]
But I'm just a grown man.
I do... that's what we do,
we look.
We admire.
[snickers]
But that's not all you do,
is it?
Um...
This is what you want.
What?
[Annabel] Or is it this?
Uh...
Or maybe this?
[screaming]
Oh, my god! Oh, my god! Penis.
Oh, go away, go away, go away.
Go away, go away, go away!
[gasps]
[thunder rumbles]
[groans]
[clicks tongue]
Oh, shit.
[groans]
[disembodied laughter]
[disembodied voices]
Macbeth!
Macbeth!
Kill thee!
[disembodied voices]
[disembodied voice]
Must do...
[ominous music]
[disembodied voices]
[disembodied voices]
Thou shall be Macbeth!
Thrice to thine,
and thrice to mine,
and thrice again
to make up nine.
Peace!
The charms...
[glass cracks, shatters]
No!
[disembodied voices]
Thou shall be Macbeth!
Ah! No, no!
No, no, no!
No, no, no!
No! No!
No! No!
Uh...
[Thomas] Oh, shit.
[sighs]
[gasps]
[sighs]
[pants, sighs]
[distant thud]
[clock ticking]
[water running]
[Thomas] Um...
[clears throat]
Did you, um...
Did you come into my room
last night?
You don't remember?
Uh, no.
[chuckles]
No, not, not clearly.
Well, if you can't remember,
then neither can I.
I've been thinking.
Um...
About how to take care
of our Alex situation?
What?
No.
[sighs]
Well then, what else...
[knife thuds, clatters]
...my King?
Well actually, it's,
it's on, um,
it's on that point. I, I...
You're weak.
- [inhales deeply]
- [Thomas] Uh...
You're weak just like he is.
Just like Macbeth.
Just perfect for the part.
[thumps]
[foreboding music]
Pathetic.
[squelching]
[cuckoos]
[foreboding music]
[knocking on door]
[knocking continues]
[door latch clicks]
So, we're all heading over
to start getting ready.
That includes you.
[Henry] Right?
Look, um...
I warned you about this.
It better not be any
of your bullshit.
I'm...
I'm just not feeling myself,
actually, so...
That's strange.
That's usually...
the only person
you have feelings for.
- [both laugh]
- [Henry] Right?
Yeah, I didn't sleep
last night, so...
Well, no one did.
But the show,
it's gotta go on, okay?
Unless you're too unwell
to perform.
No.
No, no. I...
You haven't noticed anything
unusual recently, have you?
Uh, just that, um...
just that everybody's
really upped their game.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And you don't think
that's strange?
Just the result
of all our hard work.
[clicks tongue]
Okay.
[Henry] Okay.
[Thomas scoffs]
And one last thing,
you don't, um...
you don't believe
in the haunted play idea...
do you?
Really?
Did you just ask me that?
- [Thomas] It's nothing.
- For god's sake.
It's just...
Oh, my god.
- So we're good, right?
- Yeah.
- [Henry] Yeah?
- Yeah, we're good.
Okay.
[groaning]
[grunts]
[exhales sharply]
[sniffles]
Holy shit.
Stars...
hide your fires.
[Thomas as Macbeth]
Let no light see
thy black and deep desires.
We shall be Macbeth.
Yeah.
See, I'm not, I'm not so sure.
Do not disappoint us.
Get thee, now hence.
And let sun ne'er rise again
without ambitions fated,
treasure tight,
within thy grasp.
Uh...
Mm.
[blows air]
Okay. I'm, okay.
[exhales sharply]
[pants]
- [thwacks]
- Come on.
[pants]
Show time.
[tense music]
[tense music continues]
[crackles]
[knocking on door]
Yup?
[door opens]
Can I come in?
Yeah, of course.
Oh, Thomas.
Sweetheart.
I was a little abrupt earlier.
I know I have been
an absolute mess.
[chuckles]
And too hard on you.
And I really don't want you
to carry any bad feelings
out onto the stage tonight,
okay?
Yeah, of course.
[smooches]
[chuckles]
Whoo!
- Feels good to get that out.
- Mm.
[Liz] Break a leg.
[door opens]
[door closes]
[knocks on door]
Yeah?
[door opens]
May I come in?
[suspenseful music]
Oh, Thomas, sweetheart.
That was a little abrupt
earlier.
I know I've been
an absolute mess.
And too hard on you.
[sighs]
And I really don't want you
to carry any bad feelings
onto the stage tonight, okay?
[smooches]
[chuckles]
Whoo!
Feels good to get that out.
[Liz] Break a leg.
[Liz sniffles]
What? What?
Something else?
[gasps]
Something else?
You were just here.
[Liz] I was?
Yes. You were.
[Liz] When?
Just now. Literally just now.
Just now.
[Thomas]
What the hell is going on?
What have we done, Liz?
Liz?
Something wicked
this way comes, my King.
Something wicked.
[ominous music]
Yeah.
it does.
[disembodied voices]
Archie?
Archie?
Yes, Henry.
Are these rolling set pieces
gonna work?
And did you set
the final light cues?
Did you check the taped marks,
go over the prop table...
[Archie] Yes, yes, yes.
And yes to the next three things
you're gonna ask me.
Henry, we've done this play
50 times.
- [hisses]
- [yelps]
Henry, my love.
What do you think?
Did you use a mirror
or just your intuition,
Madeline?
I thought it was very scary.
[hisses]
Well, yeah,
and maybe too much so.
We might have children
in the audience. We...
We have to be careful.
Oh, thank you for the note.
- Thank you.
- [Henry chuckles]
Mr. Henry. Mr. Henry.
I am coming now from town,
and am reporting to you
from Mr. George,
that we have
no more seats to sell.
Is good?
Is good?
[in French accent]
Is unbelievable!
[both laugh]
- Henry.
- Huh?
Sold out?
We're all sold out? Oh!
Sold out.
We are sold out!
[chuckles]
Is that unusual?
Oh, it never happens.
So exciting.
The feel of a packed theater
is absolutely thrilling.
Oh!
[Madeline] Sold out, everyone!
Sold out!
So great, isn't it?
[foreboding music]
Okay, places everyone, please.
- [Madeline] Okay, oh.
- Just, go, go, go.
Okay, witches, Jason, you ready?
And, curtain.
- [crowd applauds]
- [curtains clattering]
[Annabel] When shall we three
meet again?
In thunder, lightning,
or in rain?
When the hurly-burly's done,
when the battle's lost and won.
That will be ere the set of sun.
- Where the place?
- Upon the heath.
[Madeline] There to meet with...
Macbeth!
Oh, here we go.
Show number 51.
Two scenes, and I'm dead.
All right. Ready, Cue 11.
Cue 11, go.
[Elliot]
What bloody man is that?
He can report, as seemeth
by his plight of the revolt,
the newest state.
[male actor]
This is the Sergeant,
who like a good and hearty...
Where's Liz Beth?
- [Archie shushes]
- Tell me she's sober.
She's a professional,
don't worry.
Yeah, and she's also
an alcoholic.
And she's on in five.
- Where's Thomas?
- Ready, Cue 12.
Cue 12.
[Archie] Go.
[male actor]
The merciless Macdonwalds.
Worthy to be a rebel,
for to that,
the multiplying villainies
of nature
do swarm upon him
from the western isles,
of kerns and gallowglasses.
They made themselves air
into which they vanished.
Whilst I stood rapt
in the wonder of it,
came missives from the King,
who all hailed me...
Thane of Cawdor.
By which title before
these weird sisters saluted me,
and referred me to the coming on
of time, with...
"Hail, king that shalt be."
"Hail, king that shalt be!"
Is this...
a dagger which I see before me?
The handle toward my hand?
Come.
Let me clutch thee.
I have thee not,
and yet I see thee still.
[Alex] Art thou not...
Banquet scene
is coming up, Elliot.
Yes, of course. I'm ready.
Well, these quick changes
are gonna kill me.
Yeah, what this company needs
- is a few more actors.
- You know...
- Uh, where the hell are they?
- [chuckles]
Hey.
Try a couple of deep breaths,
my friend.
You have managed to awaken
an elderly man
from a very pleasant sleep.
Is there no bottom to the pit
that is your cruelty?
- [Nigel chuckles]
- You're welcome.
[both breathing heavily]
[Nigel] This looks right.
- Ready?
- Yeah.
[both growl]
Let's kill Thomas
- Ey!
- Let's, let's kill Thomas
- Let's kill Thomas now
- What
[both] Let's kill Thomas
Uh, let's, let's
- All right. Let's go.
- Okay.
[Nigel] Uh-uh!
- Troy?
- Shit.
What the hell are you wearing?
That's what I was just about
to ask you.
- Whoa, whoa, what the fu...
- No time, no time!
[Troy] Hey...
[both panting]
[clattering]
Uh, where the hell are they?
I don't know!
[Nigel]
This is getting freaking weird.
We're late already.
[knock on door]
[Juliet]
Henry is looking for you.
- No shit!
- No shit!
Okay, um...
It doesn't matter.
Just put something on.
- [hangers clattering]
- [Nigel groans]
You got it on backwards.
Raise that hanger right there.
[Nigel] Okay, okay.
[man 1] A light, a light!
[man 2] 'Tis he.
[lamp squeaking]
It will rain tonight.
[man 2] Let it come down!
- [man 1 grunt]
- [Thomas groans]
- [squelching]
- [thuds]
[choking]
[gasps]
- [thuds]
- [crowd gasps]
[applauds]
Get dressed later, come on.
Pig, pig.
[curtain rasping]
[suspenseful music]
- [clattering]
- [Henry] Goblets!
The pig!
Let's go. Go!
Ready, and set.
[thuds]
[both panting]
Best murder ever!
But what are you doing here?
You have a quick change
into the banquet scene!
[Henry] Go! Go, go, go!
[clattering]
- Archie! Archie, are we ready?
- [shushing]
Please tell me that we're ready.
And cue Banquet.
Go.
Ourself will mingle with society
and play the humble host.
Our hostess keeps her state,
but in best time,
we will require her welcome.
[all laughing]
- [Liz] Announce it for me.
- [Nigel and Troy panting]
[Liz] To all our friends.
- From my heart...
- Okay, okay.
speaks they are very welcome.
[all laughing]
- [Alex yells]
- [woman gasps]
Which of you have done this?
[all] What, my good Lord?
Thou can'st not say I did it.
Never shake
thy gory locks at me!
Gentlemen, rise.
His Highness is not well.
[Liz] Sit, worthy friends.
- Archie.
- [Liz] My lord is often...
Remember how you lit
Banquo's ghost tonight.
It's perfect.
- [Liz] Are you a man?
- [Alex] Aye.
And a bold one,
that dare look at that
which might appall the Devil!
Double, double time. Let's go!
- No.
- [Madeline] I'm not ready!
No, I... I look horrific.
I'm not ready.
No, come on.
We're supposed to look horrific.
- Let's go. Come on.
- [Madeline] Oh, jeez.
I'm not ready.
I'm just not ready.
Juliet, wait up!
[Annabel] I'm coming,
I'm coming.
[Madeline] Oh, well,
should we...
- [Annabel] Let's go, let's go.
- [Madeline] I'm a freight...
- [Annabel] Juliet!
- [Madeline] Freight train!
[Annabel] Come on, Madeline.
What are you doing?
[Madeline] What, wait,
where did she go?
[Annabel] Will you stop
fooling around?
Madeline, come on.
We need to hurry.
[indistinct chatter]
[Annabel] Wait, can you...
[groans]
Off the wall,
we're gonna miss our cue.
- [grunts]
- Let's go, let's go, let's go.
[Annabel] Come on, let's go.
Let's go.
We're almost there.
We're almost there.
[Annabel] That's weird.
We're back where we started.
We have to go. No, no, no.
We have to go.
We're gonna miss it,
we're gonna miss our scene.
[witches] Double, double toil
and trouble,
Fire burn, and cauldron bubble.
Eye of newt and toe of frog,
Wool of bat and tongue of dog.
- Liver of a blaspheming Jew!
- [cackling]
Gall of goat and slips of yew.
Finger of birth-strangled babe,
ditch delivered by a drab,
make the gruel thick and slab.
[witches cackling]
[witches] Double, double toil
and trouble.
Fire burn and cauldron bubble.
[Madeline]
Something's not right.
[Annabel] Come on,
you should calm down.
[Madeline] Where is the stage?
Oh...
How now,
you secret, black
and midnight hags?
What is't you do?
[witches] A deed without a name.
Pour in sow's blood,
that hath eaten her nine farrow,
grease that's sweaten
from the murderer's gibbet,
throw into the flame.
[ominous music]
Crap.
Henry.
What the hell is going on?
We didn't kill Banquo.
What are you talking about?
It was brilliant.
I mean,
it was very realistic, guys.
No, listen. We missed our scene.
We didn't kill Banquo.
Then who the hell did?
And where is he?
Archie, go find Thomas.
[witch 1]...of hemlock
digg'd i' the dark
[Annabel] No, it's...
[crowd cheering, applauding]
[crowd] Macbeth!
Macbeth!
- Macbeth!
- That's it.
It's too real. I'm done.
You play him, Henry.
[gags]
Jason, bucket!
What?
We're killing it out there.
[retching]
[Archie] Thomas.
We got a weird sit...
Thomas?
Thomas! Hey.
Hey, hey, Thomas!
Thomas.
Oh, my god.
Oh, my god. Oh, my god, shit!
Shit, shit, shit!
[distant thud]
There's knocking at the gate.
[distant thud]
[loud thump]
- Oh, come.
- [distant thud]
Come.
[chuckles]
[distant rumbling]
[inhales deeply]
What's done cannot be undone.
- [distant screaming]
- [vial shatters]
We're ready for you, my King.
[disembodied voice]
Ready for you, my King.
[light music]
[grandiose music]
Henry, we have a bit
of a situation here.
You're telling me?
Where is Alex?
Oh, thank god, there he is.
[Archie] Henry.
- Hey, Henry. Henry!
- Jason. Jason.
- Henry.
- [Henry] Cue his spot, now.
Thomas is dead.
[Thomas] Tomorrow...
and tomorrow.
And tomorrow.
What's going on?
He was really stabbed. For real.
Thomas is dead.
Not completely.
And all our yesterdays
have lighted fools
the way to dusty death.
Out.
Out brief candle.
I'm telling you, he is dead.
- Who's dead?
- Thomas.
And why the hell
is he playing my part?
Excellent question.
I'm telling you,
he is in his dressing room,
right now, dead.
[Madeline] Quiet, son.
You're frightening me.
It is a tale told by an idiot,
all sound and fury,
signifying nothing.
Show me.
[Archie] Come on.
[indistinct chatter]
[tense music]
[Henry] Oh, no.
[Troy] Oh, my god.
[Madeline] Oh, no.
Green room. Now.
[indistinct chatter]
- [Madeline] Oh, no!
- [Annabel] Jason!
[Madeline] Go quickly! Go!
What?
Is it time for the curtain call?
Not quite, Elliot.
- Thomas has been murdered.
- [Alex] He's dead.
[all whimper]
But, we have evidence
to the contrary.
- [door thuds]
- [all scream]
[Madeline] Oh!
- Oh!
- It's locked, we're trapped.
It's the curse.
What are you talking about?
We haven't done anything.
I'm afraid someone did.
Well, then someone better undo
this shit.
I don't know how.
I don't know how.
[marching footsteps]
[screams]
I pull in resolution,
and begin to doubt
the equivocation of the fiend
that lies like truth.
[Thomas as Macbeth]
Fear not,
till Birnam wood
do come to Dunsinane.
And now, a wood comes
toward Dunsinane!
[Elliot] There's no worry,
please, hurry.
Wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
Where's Liz Beth?
Wait.
Oh, my god, Henry.
She's still out there.
Liz!
[Alex] Liz!
[trumpets blowing]
[Elliot] Oh, what is that noise?
[man on speaker]
This way, my Lord!
The castle's gently rendered.
The tyrant's people
on both sides do fight.
The noble thanes do bravely
in the war...
Who's doing the play?
[gasps]
And why are they so damn good?
[horse neighs]
- [cannon fires]
- [all gasp]
[Henry] Was that real?
[swords clinking]
[Thomas] I will...
not yield!
[panting]
Of all men else...
I have avoided thee, Macduff.
My poor Elizabeth is in danger!
[stutters]
We need to help her.
And I shall assist you
in the rescue.
I served in the Queen's militia
as a young man.
Good. Great. What do we do?
- Battering ram!
- [Elliot] Yes!
- Yes.
- [Alex] Stand back!
[Alex grunts]
- [screams]
- [thuds]
[man] Off with his head!
[crowd cheering]
[cheering continues]
[crowd applauding]
- [electricity crackles]
- [thunder rumbles]
[crowd applauding, cheering]
[applauding, cheering continues]
[foreboding music]
[crowd applauding]
[somber music]
[crowd applauding, cheering]
[Madeline] What is...
what is happening?
Oh, god.
Uh, what?
- [distant thud]
- [all shriek]
- [all gasp]
- [Troy] What is it?
[all panting]
[Madeline] Close the door.
[Henry] Hello?
Hello?
You, you go ahead.
[Madeline] I'll wait here.
Good luck.
Oh, no! Oh!
Break a leg.
- [Elliot] Come.
- [whimpering]
You are safe with me, my love.
[Madeline sobs]
[suspenseful music]
[Annabel] Oh, no.
We need to grab something.
- Troy.
- Hm?
[Nigel] If we don't make it...
I love you.
We're gonna make it.
I hope.
[gasps]
[suspenseful music]
Liz Beth?
Liz Beth!
Where is she?
She was right here.
After her suicide.
Oh, my god.
She's gone, isn't she?
[Annabel sobbing]
You mean they're both...
dead?
Oh.
They were such...
wonderful actors.
[door creaking]
Perhaps they do live on...
- inside the play.
- [Annabel scoffs]
Do you really think
that's possible?
Oh, I hope so.
Hello? Who's there?
'Allo! 'Allo!
We are so sorry for the delay
we have been making.
We are the sisters Levesque.
Caretaker for Mr. George.
[Eloise] Uh, the snow
came very unexpected,
- and we are two days delayed.
- [Edna chuckles]
You make yourselves at home
though, eh?
- Ah, tres bien.
- Yeah.
Uh, Mr. George says
you are doing Mac...
- [Eloise screams]
- [Edna shrieks]
[Eloise] The Play Scottish.
Oh! Oh.
Uh, when will be
the opening, eh?
Yeah.
[suspenseful music]
[suspenseful music continues]
["Bump in the Night"
by Les Sampuo playing]
Kill her
With your alien lies
Kill her
With your expert disguise
Bump, bump, bump
Kill him
With your luscious lips
Kill him
With your swaying hips
Bump, bump, bump
Call the cops, call 911
Is nice, two is fun
How'd it get so out of hand
Hurry, hurry, hurry
Quicksand
Listen to
The city sirens howl
Night club
Hunters on the prowl
Bump, bump, bump
With hair
All wind-swept skunk
She meets
Apocalyptic cyberpunk
And they go bump, bump, bump
Bump in the night
Hearts are sinking
Awfully fast
Like olives
In a sweating glass
Bed time
The clock strikes twelve
Hurry, hurry, hurry
Schnau, schnau
There's nothing wrong
With bad intent
Unless of course
There's a consequence
How'd it get so out of hand
Bump, bump, bump
Bump, bump, bump
Bump, bump, bump
Bump, bump, bump
Bump, bump, bump
Bump, bump, bump
Bump, bump, bump