Glass Houses (2020) Movie Script
1
Hey!
Jeez, Blair! You scared
the crap out of me!
Sorry! I saw a
neighborhood watch outside.
So, I didn't want her to see me
coming through the front door,
so I slid in the back.
How was the pool party?
Eh, Megan's parents
came home early,
so you really didn't miss much.
Well, I wasn't
invited, remember?
You still could have come!
And forget they were
all jerks about my mom?
No, thank you! I'd rather
make the babysitting money.
Care, they aren't even
talking about that anymore, OK?
Really?
'Cause Brady sent me a text
asking if I could
sexually harass him too.
Well, Brady acts like
a 12-year-old idiot,
so forget about it, all right?
Come on! Don't they have
any good food here?
I can't just
forget about it, B.
Someone set up my mom!
And whoever did it is obviously
from this neighborhood.
I just have to figure
out who it was.
OK... Well, did you
find anything in here?
No!
Just this.
Get out!
Oh yeah.
And they have a set
of cuffs by their bed.
Kinky!
Did you find any skanky videos?
No. They don't
even have Netflix.
Wow. No snacks
and no streaming.
Hope they pay you decent.
Only if he pays.
The wives are always cheap.
Well, not if they
come home drunk,
like Janice Murphy.
Why don't you
give her my number?
She remarried some guy
who has a teenager,
so she doesn't need
a sitter anymore.
- Hmm.
- Or a friend like this!
Ugh!
They're home!
Oh my God!
OK! I'll text you later.
You're lying to me on the day
of your daughter's recital.
Why am I lying?
What am I lying about?
You know I do business
outside the office.
David, we'll talk
about it later.
- Yeah.
- Hey!
Carrie, I'm so sorry.
We're a bit late.
Oh, no, that's OK.
It's still summer break for me.
- How was Emma?
- Great!
She didn't complain
at all at bedtime.
Great. Well, that's 'cause
you're so good with her.
Uh, Viv, I'm short on cash.
I got it.
Thank you, Carrie.
- Thank you.
- See you across the street.
Good night, Mrs. Kelly!
Have a good night!
I feel like
you're not hearing me
and you're not listening to me!
I feel very, like...
You're in another world
all the time.
You're just working.
And... and the lying!
Like, I... I understand
that you had a meeting today,
but I don't understand why...
Carrie!
Isn't it past your curfew?
I was babysitting
for the Kellys.
Again? Hmm...
I don't blame Vivian
for being upset with David.
I'd be angry too if my husband
lied to me about golfing
instead of going to
his daughter's recital.
How do you know that's
what they're fighting about?
I saw David leaving for work
today with his golf clubs.
A wife's got a right to know
what her husband's up to.
But I need you to
make us the priority.
She should be the priority.
Thank you for removing
that sign from your lawn.
Vandalism just makes
the neighborhood so ugly.
Good night.
Bitch.
A 9-year-old metro girl
has a new lease on life,
thanks to...
Hey!
I didn't hear you
come in last night.
Yeah, the Kellys didn't
get home till after midnight.
Sorry, there's
not much to eat.
I'll bring some groceries
home from work.
Someone, uh, left one
of your old campaign posters
on the front lawn last night.
I thought people
were done with it.
You know, I'm sure as soon as
this next campaign ramps up,
they will be.
Is that douche working
another campaign?
I don't know.
Well, I hope someone accuses
him of sexual harassment
and screws his career.
Oh, Carrie...
Come on, please.
Let's put this behind us, OK?
I'll see you tonight.
OK.
Advertisers are often faced
with the problem
of catching
respectful customers.
Well, take the case of...
Mom!
Thank you, sweetheart.
Hey! Good luck
on your job interview.
Thank you.
I will see you later.
Mmm! We'll be waiting!
- I love you!
- I love you!
Have a great day
at work, sweetie!
Carrie, hey!
Sorry, I forgot
to ask you last night:
Are you free to
babysit on Saturday?
I need to meet David downtown
for dinner at 6:00,
so I need you
for 5:00?
Another date night, Vivian?
It's actually
David's birthday.
Well, I wouldn't get him any
more golf clubs if I were you!
It's no problem,
Mrs. Kelly.
I'll see you at 5:00.
Oh, and thanks to me,
they put that stop sign
I lobbied for
at the top of the street.
Thank you, Madeline!
I would have preferred a gate,
keep the riff-raff out,
but anything to better
our neighborhood, huh?
Right.
See you Saturday, Carrie!
See you Saturday!
Off to work, Brad?
So, what's this job
you're interviewing for?
Just, like, a part-time
job at the coffee house
to help out my mom.
She says we're fine, but I...
Like, I know we're not.
OK, well, what about your dad?
Can't he help out with anything?
Blair, my dad's been
MIA for, like, 10 years.
I wouldn't do that to my mom.
Well, I think
this whole thing sucks.
I know your mom.
She would never
hit on some 25 year old
with a hard-on for politics.
No, there's no way.
I just wish I knew who did it.
Yeah.
Excuse me, ladies!
Do you mind keeping it down?
Daniel is such a light napper,
and he'll be cranky
if he wakes up too soon.
Could she be
any more annoying?
No, she treats that kid
like he's God's gift
and she's Mother Theresa.
She made my mom take down
all her birdhouses
'cause she didn't like that
they were crapping on her deck.
- No. Seriously?
- Yeah. Trust me.
She would lobby to ban
birds from the neighborhood
if she could.
Hey! Let me drive you
to your interview later
so that we can hang out longer.
Cool?
- OK.
- OK.
Oh! Have you seen the meme
of the dog and the vacuum?
You're gonna lose it.
Look at this.
How good is that?
I seriously watched this,
like, 100 times.
Maybe I'll come in
and have an iced mocha
while you do your interview.
Yeah.
What the hell?
What's going on?
Why are they towing my car?
Looked to me like the car was
parked too close to the hydrant.
That, or somebody thought
it was meant for the junk yard.
Are you serious?
My job interview!
I'm gonna be so late.
Oh, I have to go.
Blair, I'm so sorry!
I'll call you later!
OK!
Carrie! Is everything
all right? It's late!
Did your job interview go OK?
Blair's car got towed,
so I was late.
Oh! I'm sorry,
sweetie.
Excuse me! Do you mind
not overpacking the bag?
Sorry.
I'm sure it was
Mrs. Cooper who called.
The hydrant was
in front of her house.
Does it matter who called?
No, no. Don't put
the bread at the bottom.
Sorry.
Mom, seriously.
I can't do anything
without her shoving her nose
in my business, our business!
Have a nice night!
Look, I know that
she can be a busybody,
but she is our neighbor, OK?
We just have to
tolerate her for now.
Yeah, I know.
I'm sorry. I...
I'm just venting.
Oh, I'm sorry.
You shouldn't have to worry
about getting a job so much.
Like you shouldn't
be bagging groceries.
Hey, there is no
shame in it, right?
I'm just doing what I
have to do right now.
We both just have to
make the best of it, OK?
Do you want to wait
till my shift's over?
I can give you a ride home.
No, it's OK.
I'm gonna take the bus.
OK...
Carrie...
Just remember,
nobody is perfect,
no matter how green
their grass is.
Did you see
the urns out in front?
I thought they'd look perfect
if I added a little
nightshade to them.
Oh, thank you.
Um, well, what did you do
to the ones last year?
I liked those.
The hydrangeas?
Yeah, I could pot those instead.
You know, you should do
whatever you like, Maddie.
You always make
the place look great.
Oh, by the way, I have to fly
to Chicago next week.
Mmm! Again?
Maddie, it's the job.
I know. It's just...
It's so quiet without you here.
Well, I'm sure you've got
something going on,
I mean, some lobby or crusade.
Actually...
I'm seriously thinking
about running for councilor
in this next election.
That way, I could lobby to
have our little street gated,
something our
neighbor pooh-poohed
when she was councilor.
Well, I think running
is a fantastic idea.
I gotta take this.
I'm sorry.
Mark, hey! Yeah,
no, I got the email.
But, uh, a couple
deal points were missing.
Yeah.
When you go off the track
There's really nothing
more to say
You've moved out now
All right, Emma!
Now, when you're batting,
throw your bat
over your shoulder,
bend your knees,
swing all the way through.
OK?
Aim right here,
in this general area.
You got this. Go.
I'll get it.
That was awesome.
That deserves a Popsicle.
Mmm!
There you go, heavy hitter!
- Thanks!
- Oh!
When did you get that?
I don't know.
OK, I'll go get
something to clean it up.
I'm sorry.
I... I was just looking
for a Band-Aid.
OK...
I'm sorry. I don't
know how she did it.
Don't be sorry.
I appreciate the time
you take with Emma.
So, here, take this.
Think of it as a bonus.
See you when I get home!
- Bye, Mommy!
- Be good!
Mm-hmm!
I can't believe
you actually busted her.
I mean, how awkward was that?
Well, more for her than me.
Then, she, like, paid me off
to forget about it.
Well, if I was a PTA mom,
I don't think I'd want people
knowing I was a cokehead.
In fact, I bet she'd pay
a lot more money than that
to keep it quiet.
So, what? I just ask her
for more money?
No, tell her you
raised your rates.
She'll get it.
It's just payback for
all of those people
who were so quick to cast stones
and judge your mom.
Including her, I'm sure.
And I bet there's a lot
more people like her
living in those
pretty glass houses.
I was a nice young girl
I was lost too much
Hey, Mrs. Kelly!
Need a hand?
Thanks, Carrie,
but this is the last of it.
Well, I was just coming
by to say thank you again
for your bonus yesterday.
I told you, Carrie.
We appreciate you.
I know.
Which is great,
because I was gonna tell you
that I raised my hourly rate,
you know, to help my mom.
And, I mean, I-I guess you
could hire somebody cheaper,
but I doubt they would know you
and your habits as well as I do.
Of course we wouldn't
hire someone else.
Just let me know what
your new rate is,
and I'll be happy to pay.
Great!
I was a nice young girl
You were so right.
They totally went for it.
And so did the Pattersons!
What dirt do you have on them?
Just that Mr. Patterson
pretends to go to work every day
because he doesn't want
anyone on the street
to know he was fired for fraud.
No way! Seriously?
I found his termination papers
when I was babysitting.
Wow! You are the boss.
I kind of am.
The only thing that
would make this better
is if I could find
something that'll tell me
who set my mom up,
because, you're right,
no one should judge when
everyone has something to hide.
Madeline?
I'll be right down!
So, I suggested they buy
the stock at six five.
Mm-hmm.
And they hesitated.
But then, I convinced them.
And now, it just
sold just over ten.
Ah! Honey!
That is so great.
They must have been so happy.
Yeah, I mean, I think so.
They're booking a holiday.
You know, we should do that too.
Hmm.
Just go away for a night,
just the two of us.
But who would
look after Daniel?
Well, we'd find someone.
What about Carrie next door?
She babysits, right?
She does. But overnight?
I don't know if I can trust him
with someone for that long.
Oh, come on.
You...
Other than nursery school,
you never even leave him.
Hey, you've got
a degree in marketing.
You're too smart
for just baby talk.
I know.
Which is why I have formally
thrown my hat in the ring
for councilor.
That should keep me busy,
don't you think?
Cheers!
- Mmm.
- Mmm!
Hello? This is she.
Right, I understand.
OK. I'll come by tomorrow.
Everything OK?
My mother is fighting
her physio nurse.
They think she'd respond better
with me there,
so looks like I'll need
a sitter after all!
Oh.
Carrie! Come in.
Thanks.
You know, I think
this is the first time
you've been in my home.
What do you think?
It's nice.
Nice?
You know, my house was
featured in the Blythwood Post.
- Oh, that's great!
- Thank you.
Can you believe I've never used
a babysitter before?
I mean, Daniel goes
to nursery school,
but that's different.
There are qualified
ECE teachers watching him.
Now, on the fridge
is my cell phone
and my mom's landline
and a list of dos
and don'ts for Daniel.
Why don't you read it
while I check on him?
Sure.
So, Daniel's still napping,
but there are two-way
monitors in most rooms,
so you'll hear when he wakes up.
Now, I'll be gone
for a few hours.
But if you're available,
I'll need you at the same time
for the next couple of weeks.
- I'll be there!
- Great!
Daniel's dinner is in
the fridge. Don't overheat it.
Mom? It's me!
- Hey!
- It's her, B.
That bitch next door,
she's the one
that set up my mom.
- Are you sure?
- Yes!
Why else would she have photos
of my mom and that douche
who said she harassed him?
So, what are you gonna do?
I'm gonna keep babysitting
until I find everything I can.
And then I'm gonna throw
a few stones of my own.
Daniel, sweetheart!
Mommy's back!
Corn on the cob
coming right up!
Oh, no!
No! No, no!
He can't have
sugar after 6:00!
Didn't you read the list?
Here, although I don't
know what I'm paying for
if you can't take
simple instruction.
Um, actually,
Mrs. Cooper,
all the other neighbors
pay me $20 an hour.
Carrie, you're lucky
I'm not docking you
for the cost of fixing
the dent in my car
when you were in charge of Emma.
Well, what about
the towing cost
for my friend's car?
That was a safety hazard.
After all, what if it was your
house that was burning down,
and the firefighters
couldn't get to the hydrant,
and your poor mom had to watch
all that she has left
go up in smoke?
Wouldn't that just be awful?
After already losing so much.
I'll see you next week!
Same time.
Mm-hmm.
And I can see monsieur there
is someone who likes
his food very delicious.
It was her.
It's her fault
you had to step down.
Now you can prove
you were set up.
I mean, Carrie, these still...
They don't prove anything.
How can you say that?
Why else would she have
pictures of you with this guy?
She must have hired
a detective or something
to take pictures
and dig up dirt.
What if it
was her? Hmm?
Well, what if it
was someone else?
What if it was...
Oh my God!
What if it was
a conspiracy of people
trying to get me to step down?
Carrie, you're never gonna
change people's views.
Because once you've been judged
by the court of public opinion,
that's it!
It's over.
- I don't believe that.
- Ah!
I know it was her.
And she should pay,
just like you did.
Madeline!
Can I help you with something?
Actually, you can.
What is your experience
with Carrie?
I mean, aside from her doing
what I informed her not to do,
I almost feel like
she's extorting me
with her babysitting rates.
I mean, $20 an hour?
Do you pay that?
Madeline, what we pay
Carrie is our business.
Personally, we feel you
can't pay too high a price
for good childcare.
Oh! Well, I guess
I wouldn't know.
I don't rely on other
people to watch my child
as much as you do,
so I guess I'm just
out of the babysitting loop.
- Mmm.
- OK! Thanks!
- Hey!
- Hey!
Did you fill my
car up with gas?
Yeah. The Kellys
raised my rate.
Hey! You know,
I have the night off.
Do you wanna binge watch
something like we used to?
Sure.
OK. I'll make popcorn.
OK.
See you down there.
Carrie, hi!
Ah! I'm sorry.
I meant to call you earlier,
but my day has just
gotten away from me.
But I won't be
needing you anymore.
Excuse me?
I need someone
who follows instructions.
I went to a babysitting service.
I mean, they aren't
cheap either,
but they're bonded and vetted,
so I don't mind paying.
Yeah, it's just
that I actually canceled
another babysitting job
to make this work.
I'm sorry, but I... I already
have someone here.
I'm sure you understand.
And there's a list
on the fridge!
Whoo!
Hey, B.
You're not gonna believe
what the witch next door
just pulled.
No, I'm coming over right now.
Daniel!
Daniel!
He's wearing a blue polo
and beige overalls.
And he's carrying a train.
He always has his toy train.
- Uh-huh. OK.
- Thank you.
- John...
- Hey.
I looked everywhere,
the whole neighborhood,
the school, the park...
- I know.
- I don't know where he is.
We'll find him, I promise.
- We have to!
- I know!
I'm so sorry.
Get away from us!
Hey...
What's going on?
Daniel's wandered
off somewhere.
What do you mean? How?
Where was the babysitter?
Getting dinner or
something. I don't know.
I'll help look for him.
Thank you.
That'd be fantastic.
Yeah, no problem.
- I have to get inside.
- No, OK. Yeah.
- Hey.
- Hey.
Daniel!
Daniel!
Daniel!
Daniel!
Daniel!
Daniel!
Daniel?
Daniel!
Daniel!
Mama!
It's OK. It's OK,
baby. It's OK.
You stay here. It's OK!
I saw the amber alert.
What time are your
parents coming home?
I told you, later,
but I'm not worried
about them catching us!
No one will catch us, OK?
Everyone's gonna
think I'm a hero.
Then I'll have my way
back in with the Coopers.
It's gonna be fine.
Well, I hope it was worth it.
OK.
- Mama!
- Yeah!
Mama!
The gate was locked.
I'm sure of it.
Unless that sitter opened it.
She's such a stupid girl!
No, we'll find him.
- Oh my God! Daniel!
- Daniel! Daniel!
Oh my God! Oh my God!
Daniel, baby! Oh, come here!
Come here!
Where were you?
Where did you go?
I know he loves trains.
I checked by the tracks,
and he was there!
What do you mean?
What was he doing?
He was playing with his train!
And no one saw him?
I guess not!
I don't know.
Carrie, we can't tell
you how grateful we are.
No.
It's OK.
I... I'm just so glad
we found him.
Listen, uh, the police,
they're probably gonna
wanna speak to you, OK?
Yeah, yeah. I know.
- Thank you. Thank you again!
- Yeah.
And... and believe me,
from now on,
nobody takes care of our kid
except for you, OK?
OK.
Hey, buddy!
Hey...
Hey.
You coming to bed?
Yeah.
I just wanted
to check on him again.
Maddie, you're not
gonna be able to watch him
for every minute of every day.
And now everyone
is going to think
I'm like Vivian
across the street,
neglectful of her child.
No.
No one's gonna think that.
And even if they do, who cares?
'Cause it's never
gonna happen again.
We're gonna make sure he's
always in the best hands.
Never.
I still can't believe
she just found him.
Well, thankfully, she did.
Come to bed.
I will.
I promise.
OK.
Now, don't forget, no sugar.
And don't let him
out of your sight.
In fact, just... just
stay in the house.
I've locked all the doors:
the back door, the gate...
You have everything
you need here, so...
We'll be fine.
I promise.
Now, unfortunately,
I'll be at my mother's
a little longer today.
I should be back
no later than 10:00.
Uh, so, is Mr. Cooper around
in case of emergency?
He's away on business.
And you're just gonna be
at your mom's the whole time?
I'm only asking in case you
want to throw another number
up there on the fridge.
If you need me,
just call me on my cell.
Great.
Blair?
Yeah, I'm gonna need
another favor.
Do you wanna try
another cookie?
Do you want another cookie?
You already have two.
Mmm!
When I was a kid
I was a wit
So nobody wanted me around
My mom loved me
My dad loved me
But I still felt like
I needed a friend
I'll be moving my
mother into a home next week,
so the house needs to be put
on the market ASAP.
I don't care what
you sell it for,
'cause personally, I think
this place should be condemned.
I wanted you to be
I'm sure you can understand
why I can't stay long.
Oh, sweetheart,
don't make it sound like
you're doing me a favor.
Madeline!
You know you wouldn't be
where you are without me, huh?
Carrie...
Carrie?
There you are.
How is he?
Asleep.
Good.
Anyway, I won't be
needing you next week,
as my mom's being moved
to a home, but thank you.
Actually, I don't think
this will quite cover it.
I've paid your
new rate, Carrie,
even if I do think
it's extortion.
I think you owe me
and my mom a lot more.
Really? And
how is that?
I saw the photos
you took of her.
So, you've been going
through my things?
Good to know.
What are you doing?
I hardly think you need
to be paid for snooping.
- You set my mom up!
- I did nothing of the sort.
But if someone did,
maybe they thought your mom
wasn't doing a good enough job
for the neighborhood.
I mean, do you know the taxes
we pay to live here?
My mom lost her job,
people's respect.
You need to go now, Carrie.
I saw you with him.
What exactly did you see?
Doesn't matter.
'Cause we know that people
are so quick to judge.
It most definitely
matters, Carrie.
So, what did you see?
When did you see it?
And what does it prove?
Why aren't you answering me?
Is it because you were somewhere
you weren't supposed to be?
Because leaving a child
unattended is a crime.
Go home, Carrie.
I'm sure your husband
would love to know
what you were up to.
Really?
And what's he gonna say to that,
when you have no
evidence of any kind?
Besides, he's been
screwing his assistant
for the last 3 years,
so I doubt he'd have
much to say about it anyway.
You're done.
You miss me already?
Someone knows, Clark.
And everything you've done for
me will have been for nothing
if it all comes out,
so we're done.
Then you asked me
for another $25,000.
So we're done
when I say we're done.
So, how skanky
was this lingerie?
Are we talking
bondage style or...
Skanky enough.
I just wish I saw him.
Wow! That is some tacky
bling he's got going on.
But it's not a wedding ring,
so he's less of
a douche than she is.
Yeah, well, I wish
I had gotten a photo of her,
and not this ugly ring.
I can't really do
anything with this.
So, what are you gonna do?
I'm gonna get her
the proof she wants.
Ugh! Well,
good luck with that.
I doubt she's gonna let
you into her home again.
No, she won't.
But her husband will.
Hey!
Oh! Hey, neighbor!
Hey, listen, I've been
meaning to pop over
and properly thank you
for finding Daniel.
No, thank you, but I
can't take that.
It means enough to know
I'm your number-one sitter.
That's right!
Because you found Daniel!
Sweetheart, what do you think
of this as a campaign slogan?
"Cooper cares."
What campaign?
Oh, well, Maddie's
running for councilor.
I mean, I'm sure she's spoken
to your mother about it, right?
Actually, I haven't
had the chance.
Don't worry.
I'll let her know.
Hey, uh, Carrie,
if you're free,
we have a retirement
party tomorrow
And, uh, I mean, I'd love it if
you could take care of Daniel.
- Of course. I'll see you then!
- Great!
I un-I understand.
Yeah, if you could
just give me 30 days,
then I could pay
last month's taxes
and this month...
No, I can't tomorrow. I work.
Yeah. OK, bye.
- What was that about?
- Oh, nothing, honey.
Just juggling some things.
You know, Mr. Cooper
offered me money
for finding Daniel.
I could take it.
Well, if he does
it again, you should.
You should keep it.
You deserve it.
You know, Mrs. Cooper
is running for councilor.
Maybe that was her
plan all along.
Ah!
We just have to hope
she doesn't win.
You know she's gonna
do everything she can
to make sure she does.
So, do I have
to attend this party?
Well, spouses are welcome,
so, yeah, it'd be nice.
Ah, crap.
Hey, do we have
a charge cord up here?
Should be one in the dresser.
Oh, hon, you know,
you really shouldn't have
told Anna you were running.
I mean, despite the whole
harassment debacle,
we still are neighbors.
Unfortunately.
So, how long
are we expected to stay?
Oh, not too long.
I wouldn't worry about it.
Carrie's proven to be reliable,
certainly trustworthy.
Actually, I'm not
so sure about that.
The night I went to see my mom,
she was clearly going
through our things.
Well, were you worried
she'd find this?
That was meant
to be a surprise.
Well, it still could be,
when you put it on.
Tonight?
Well then, it wouldn't
be a surprise,
now would it?
So you're just gonna
have to wait for it.
I tried knocking, but I figured
this is where you would be.
What do you want?
I just want to know more
about how you found Daniel
the other night.
It would give me peace of mind,
so I can make sure
it doesn't happen again.
I told you, I found him
by the tracks.
And what was he doing?
Playing, you know,
with his train.
- On the ground?
- Yeah.
In clear sight?
No, he was, um,
he was behind these,
like, crates there.
Oh. That's amazing!
I mean, what a coincidence
that you of all people
were able to find him
so effortlessly.
Yeah, well, you know,
Daniel and his train...
Just put two and two together.
That would make sense,
wouldn't it?
So much, you wouldn't
even question it,
except Daniel didn't have
any dirt on his clothes.
Not a spot.
Which is odd, don't you think,
if he was playing on the ground?
I know how much you
hate when he's dirty,
so I brushed him off for you.
How thoughtful of you.
Don't you have a party
to get ready for?
See you at 6:00!
Oh, hey, uh,
I should say hello.
OK.
Gentlemen...
How are you doing?
Better not be on my bill.
Listen, you guys just
keep it, you know...
All right.
That's back pay.
You remember Anita,
my assistant, right?
Mm-hmm.
She would never forgive me
if you didn't come say hello.
- Mmm.
- All right?
Anita! Oh, it's
been too long!
Madeline!
So good to see you!
Hide this, you bitch!
So, does Anita have any
thoughts on retirement?
Oh, no, she says as long
as she's still standing,
she's not retiring.
So, I don't have to worry
about some hot, young
assistant anytime soon?
Hey, Maddie...
You don't have to
worry about anyone.
I promise.
Is there anyone I
should be worried about?
Mmm, of course not.
Good.
Mmm.
Hey, Carrie!
Hey!
- How was everything?
- Great!
Yeah? Good.
Listen, I know you said
you couldn't just take it,
so, you know what?
Just consider it a bonus.
- Thank you, Mr. Cooper.
- You're welcome.
Oh, and, um, Mrs. Cooper,
I forgot to mention,
the other night, when you
were out after your mom's
the motel called, said you
left something in the room.
Yes, I retrieved it.
Thank you, Carrie.
Good night.
- Good night.
- Good night.
Well, I think that you
were right about Carrie!
Everything seems
really great here!
Huh. When were
you in a hotel?
Uh, I think that was
when you were in Boston.
And what were you
doing there exactly?
I was meeting
with a campaign manager.
Fiona Scott?
She was Dwight's manager
in Borel County.
She was passing through,
and agreed to meet me!
Oh. And?
And, mmm...
Turns out our schedules
don't really match.
But sounds like Daniel
is fast asleep, so...
So...
So, have you
showed your mom yet?
No, she, uh, she
already left for work
when I got up
this morning, so...
But she's home now.
What's going on?
Blair, you should go home, OK?
Carrie will call you later.
OK.
Carrie, Mrs. Cooper
would like to give you
an opportunity to
explain your behavior.
What behavior?
Stealing, destroying
personal property.
You installed
security cameras?
Why would you do that?
I'd say it was necessary.
Wouldn't you think?
Mrs. Cooper should
come clean about what she did.
Carrie, that is not
what this is about.
No, it is what
this is about, Mom.
She wrote a check, Mom,
for $25,000, to William Beck.
See?
She paid him off to say
you harassed him!
I don't think it's a crime
to donate towards a young man's
political ambitions,
but as far as what Carrie did,
I wouldn't be out of line
to notify the police.
Madeline, that isn't
going to be necessary.
I don't know.
Is it?
Who's to say she hasn't
violated our other neighbors
in the same way?
I have no problems
with the other neighbors.
Well, I'd like to think
that you're telling the truth,
but in case you aren't,
I'll agree not to
go to the police,
as long as you agree
to stop babysitting.
I use that money
to help my mom,
and I wouldn't have to
if it weren't for you.
Carrie, Carrie...
I don't think that Mrs. Cooper's
request is unreasonable.
Of course, she will pay
for the damage to your floors.
And I think that
we can all agree
that nobody needs to
know the circumstances
of why she stopped babysitting.
Of course.
I can understand why you
wouldn't want another scandal
plaguing your house.
You are such a hypocrite!
- I'll walk you to the door.
- Thank you.
Madeline!
We both know you
don't give a damn
about that boy's ambitions.
So, let's call us even, OK?
Mom...
I was just trying to find
something, and I did.
And now you can
prove it was her!
Carrie, you have got to stop.
Because all you're doing now
is sabotaging your own future.
So, you're not
gonna do anything?
What do you want me to do?
I've told you that it isn't
gonna make any difference.
So what else is there?
Do you want to move?
Do you...
Do you want me to sell
the only thing that I
have worth anything?
Because that isn't
gonna help right now!
Don't you think that
I want to rip her head off?
Because I didn't support
her views on condos
and I didn't lobby
for a stupid gate!
But then what?
She's still our neighbor.
Oh, Carrie, you have
got to let this go!
Because the person
that I saw on that video...
that is not you.
I can't say I'm surprised
that you're gonna run
for council, Madeline.
You do so much
for the community already.
Well, I think we can all agree
we want our kids to grow up
in the best neighborhood
in the city.
Mmm!
Speaking of which, I caught
our neighborhood sitter, Carrie,
snooping in my house.
Thankfully, I don't have
any secrets to hide.
Not like you.
What are you talking about?
Oh, come on, Vivian.
You don't think I notice
that strange car that pulls up
to your house every week,
by a driver whom you
never welcome inside?
I mean, I'm not surprised,
based on his appearance.
Although, you do seem
very happy to give him cash,
in exchange for, what, pills?
Coke?
I'm gonna go with cocaine,
based on how dilated
your pupils are.
Your accusations
are offensive, Madeline.
Really?
Is the reason
you pay Carrie so much
because she found something
when she was watching Emma?
If you tell me,
I'd be less inclined to voice
my concerns with your husband.
It's not something
I'm proud of, Madeline.
Of course not.
Is that all Carrie
wanted from you? Money?
I think so.
You're not gonna
tell David, are you?
I mean, I'm trying
to get a handle on it.
Just clean up
your act, Vivian.
'Cause I don't pay the taxes
I do to live across the street
from a junkie who brings trash
into my neighborhood.
And if it's not taken care of
by the time I run for council,
Child Services may just
be getting a call.
Hey, Mr. Cooper!
How's Daniel?
He's fine, Carrie, despite us
putting our trust in you.
Hey, I'm sorry
about what I did.
I was just upset
with Mrs. Cooper
for what she did to my mom,
and now what she's doing to you.
Are you talking about
the affair, Carrie?
Because she told me
all about it,
about how you tried to extort
money from her and the neighbors
with your lies.
So you could get,
what, $20 an hour?
I didn't make it up,
any of it. I swear!
She paid off that
campaign worker $25,000.
Enough, Carrie.
The lingerie she was
wearing the other night,
she wore it at the motel.
Just ask her.
It's catchy, don't you think?
And pretty soon,
they'll be everywhere.
Oh, I think I just
heard a car pull up.
- Hey, John! How are you?
- Good!
And where is
that future councilor?
There she is!
Love the sign,
but, uh, that smile,
so much better in person!
Happy birthday, Clark!
It's nice to see you.
Well, what?
No birthday hug from
the prettiest girl I know?
Next to your mom, of course.
She was the most beautiful
woman in the room.
How are you, Clark?
Good. Feeling like
a young lad these days.
John, do you want
to get a Clark a drink?
And I'm gonna go
check on Daniel.
What can I get you?
So, how's business?
Profits are the best
they've ever been!
At this rate,
I won't be able to spend it all
before I'm six feet under.
Although I do my best to
spread the wealth around.
You should get remarried.
That way, you could have
a partner to keep you company
and help spend your money.
Is that what Madeline
does, John?
Spend your money?
Actually, she'll be too busy
when she wins the election.
Yeah, well, careful
what you wish for.
I sure as hell don't know
if I'd want to get
into politics these days.
Oh yeah? Why's that?
The dirt that they dig up...
I mean, whether it's true
or not, you know,
it can ruin you
before you even run.
Yeah, well, we've already
had a bit of practice
in that department, haven't we?
Really? What about?
Just a neighbor
who tried to extort
abhorrently high babysitting
rates by telling lies.
Oh, sounds like
a great entrepreneur!
Maybe I should give her a job.
Figures you'd see it that way.
You done with that?
Well, that was
a splendid evening!
I couldn't have
thought of a better way
to spend my birthday!
Well, we were
glad to have you.
Well, let's not leave it
so long next time, huh?
Carrie...
Can we help you?
I was just wondering
if you got a new car.
She's a beauty, huh?
Even though she does kind of
chew through my wallet in gas.
Ah, who cares
if it makes a statement?
Oh, let me guess.
The entrepreneur, right?
Mmm. I should go
check on Daniel.
Are you sure
you're OK to drive?
Are you kidding?
A couple of drinks aren't enough
to bring this guy down.
Huh? You didn't hear that!
Anyway, give that little
spitfire a kiss from Grandpa!
Mmm.
Who's texting you so late?
Just a reminder
to look at my campaign page
before it goes live.
Oh. OK.
Um, do you want me to get these?
No, I got it.
I'll come up to bed
as soon as I'm done down here.
- OK.
- OK.
I'm going up.
- Good night.
- Night.
Thank you.
So, when did you say
you were leaving
for your conference again?
Tomorrow, why?
I just wanted to make sure
I had it right in the calendar.
Ah, OK. Well, hey!
Uh, see you later.
- Oh. Bye, sweetie!
- Bye!
Great!
Now you can make plans
with your father-in-law.
He could even come here,
or would that be too weird,
you know, doing it
in your stepson's bed?
Carrie, keep this up,
and we will file
defamation charges.
The night I saw you,
I saw his big,
ugly ruby-red ring
on his fat old-man finger,
and I have
the photos to prove it.
Your photos prove nothing.
They may.
They may not.
I wouldn't test it,
though, if I were you.
'Cause wouldn't
that be a scandal?
One that I doubt
Mr. Cooper or your voters
would ever forgive you for.
Coming, Daniel!
Oh! Ah! Oh!
Her father-in-law?
Ew! That is so gross.
I know, right?
What is he, like, her
sugar daddy or something?
The money she used
to pay off that liar
had to come from somewhere.
And it's not like she has it.
I mean, you should see
where her mom lives.
Total skidsville.
I bet she used him
to get out of there.
Looks like Little Miss Perfect
isn't so perfect after all.
Hardly.
And I'm gonna use this to
totally screw with her.
Are you sure, Care?
Your mom knows what happened.
Maybe you should let her
deal with this on her own.
My mom's not
gonna do anything.
So it's all up to me.
Sorry, honey. I won't be
home until the morning, OK?
Why?
Oh, I'm just working a double.
Do you have to?
Just for now.
- OK.
- Yeah.
Uh, oh, there's, uh,
frozen pizza for dinner, OK?
I'll see you in the morning?
- OK. I love you.
- I love you.
Hello?
What was that?
Yes!
Uh-huh. I would love to do
a press interview via video.
When... Next week?
That would be great.
Thank you!
I thought I was bad
She worse
I thought I was bad
She worse
I keep her around
for a purpose
When she around,
you get nervous
I thought I was bad
She worse
I thought I was bad
She worse
I thought I was bad
She worse
I thought I was bad
She worse
I keep her around
for a purpose
Carrie, could you please
turn down the music?
I thought I was bad
She worse
Ah! What is it, Carrie?
What exactly are you after?
Huh? Is it money?
You know, a little extra
babysitting money
would be nice to help my mom.
But then I learned that you're
the reason why we're struggling.
I guess I could try to
extort more money from you,
but honestly,
I'd rather you know
what it's been like for my mom,
to have everyone look at you,
lose respect for you, shame you.
No one's ever gonna
believe you, Carrie.
And when I'm elected councilor,
I will do everything in my power
to get rid of trash
like you and your mother
from my neighborhood.
I thought I was bad
She worse
I thought I was bad
She worse
I keep her around
for a purpose
When she around,
you get nervous
I thought I was bad
She worse
I thought I was bad
She worse
I keep her around
for a purpose
Hey, sweetheart!
How are the meetings?
Interesting.
Really? How... how so?
You know what?
Let's just talk about it
when I get back, OK?
Anything I should
be concerned about or...
I don't know.
What's going on over there?
I hear Daniel.
It's that girl next door.
Her... her music's
keeping Daniel up.
And, of course,
her mother isn't home, so...
Right. Look, I gotta go.
Uh, I'll see you
Thursday night, OK?
- Bye, sweetheart!
- Bye.
I keep her around
for a purpose
Come here, honey!
You know Mommy doesn't like it
when everyone hears you crying.
I mean, we don't want people
thinking I'm a bad mommy!
No, do you? OK, Daniel, please.
Please, stop crying, sweetie.
Stop crying, sweetie.
Please, just stop it.
I mean, that's enough.
Just stop it.
Just stop it! Stop it!
I was right under the nose
like a moustache
I move crowds
a new sound
Leave them all speechless
then the hush happens
Shhh
What?
Saw the top tier list
when I read through it
That ass, would you
make some changes
I'd put red to it
Cross the bunch out
The rest put an X through it
It's not ill if my name
ain't next to it
They said you gotta do it
Gotta flow loose,
ooh, ooh
Carrie!
Carrie!
Hey yo
Ain't a snake
in the grass
And this ain't hip-hop
What are you doing?
I tried calling you,
but of course,
you couldn't hear me.
So, you entered through my
back door without me knowing
and looked through my phone?
Mmm...
Daniel hasn't slept all day.
And your music...
You're lucky that one
of the other neighbors
didn't call the police.
Really? 'Cause I did.
- Why?
- I was scared, Madeline.
Someone was in my house that
shouldn't have been here!
You're being
ridiculous, Carrie.
That's why I grabbed this.
I thought you were an intruder.
I hardly think calling
the police was necessary.
Oh. Like, how you threatened
to call the police on me?
You'll be lucky if
they don't arrest you.
I'm sure once I speak
to the police and explain that...
That you entered
through my back door
while I was home alone at night?
I mean, I was terrified
when I heard you.
I thought you were
gonna kill me.
Guess this is just another
thing you're gonna have
to explain
to Mr. Cooper.
By the way,
I have plenty of copies
of those photos you deleted.
You know, the ones
that prove nothing.
I'm sorry, officer.
I didn't mean to make
this such a big deal.
I was just scared.
Well, you did the right
thing by calling us.
And, obviously, it was
a misunderstanding.
I'm just glad I didn't
accidentally hurt Mrs. Cooper.
I guess that's why
you don't enter
into people's houses
without them knowing.
Just remember to keep your
doors locked at all times.
I will, thank you.
Good night!
Um, officer. Sorry, um...
Will there be
any report of this?
You see, I'm running
for councilor,
and even a misunderstanding
like this could be a problem
if my opponents got ahold of it.
Well, there will be a report.
But no charges were laid.
And the report will
state our names?
- It does.
- Oh. OK.
But I'm sure you
don't have to worry.
Oh. Then you don't
understand politics.
Thank you so much!
Hello?
Hi there! This is Gary Ross,
your local realtor.
I hear you're looking
to sell your home.
Actually, I'm... I'm not.
Where did you hear that from?
Uh, one of your neighbors,
who was obviously misinformed.
But if you change your mind...
OK, thanks. Bye.
What gives you
the right, Madeline?
I just got a call
from Gary Ross,
who told me that you told him
that I want to list my house.
I thought it would help you.
I mean, I see you're struggling
And I hear it's a
great time to sell.
You could get well over asking.
I'm struggling,
Madeline, because of you.
Because God forbid anybody
around here does something
that you don't like,
doesn't mow their lawn
or pick up after their dog.
And what was it you didn't
like that I didn't support?
That you wanted to put a gate
at the end of the street?
It would give the
neighborhood prestige.
Who wouldn't want that?
And when I'm elected,
I'll make sure that it happens.
Well, I mean, if you
are gonna make it
so prestigious around here,
my house value
should only go up!
I mean, why on earth
would I want to sell now?
Maybe because of all the press
that's gonna be around
once my campaign kicks in?
I'm sure they'll be very curious
what my disgraced
neighbor has been up to.
But if you want to
stick around, stay.
Is everything OK?
It is now.
Vivian, what is it?
It's your car.
Did you see who did this?
No. David and I noticed
when he left for work.
Why do you think
someone would do this?
How the hell would I know?
Is that why the police
were here the other night?
I told you, you bring
riff-raff into our neighborhood,
and this is exactly
what happens.
Make sure you don't scratch it.
Or she'll make you pay.
How did you explain this
to all the other neighbors?
Must have been
pretty embarrassing.
I have security
cameras outside
that'll show me if you
did this, Carrie.
Yeah, I figured.
Hope you didn't have anywhere
important to go.
This time, I will
call the police.
Maybe we should
think about moving.
I mean, obviously,
the neighborhood is going
to crap with all the vandals
and everything else going on.
You can't be
serious, Madeline.
This street is your life.
You're running for councilor,
for goodness sakes!
Yeah, well, I don't
even think as councilor,
I could turn this around.
Where is this coming from?
I told you!
No, I know what
you told me, Madeline!
Does this have something
to do with Carrie next door?
Of course not.
She's just a
manipulative teenager.
You know, I... I found out
that Brad Patterson,
he was let go.
His name came up
during my meetings,
and, uh, turns out,
no one wants to hire him
because of the fraud charge.
So she wasn't lying about that.
Well, she was lying
about everything else.
And you know what?
I even think she was lying
about finding Daniel.
You know, Maddie, it's
starting to sound like
you're the one who's
making the accusations.
I mean, maybe Vivian Kelly
does have a drug problem.
And Carrie would be
the one to know,
being there babysitting
all the time.
Just like here,
come to think of it.
I can't believe we're
having this conversation.
You should have seen it, B.
The neighbor across
the street came to watch,
and then all the others came.
Thought she was gonna
have a mental breakdown
right then and there.
Why don't you just get her
to like, buy you
a new car or something?
Call it a day?
And miss out on
all this fun? No way!
Let's go get our polish
so we can do our toes.
OK.
I think I'm gonna do
hot pink for the summer.
That would be cute!
Or, like, yellow.
Yeah, I'll put in
the bid right away.
You got it, Ron. Bye.
Mrs. Cooper,
are you still there?
I am!
Perfect! We're gonna go live
in ten seconds.
Great!
So, how far are you
gonna go with all this?
Until she's knocked
down off her pedestal.
Or until she moves.
As a ten-year resident
of the community,
I know what makes
Blythwood District so special.
Well, what if she doesn't?
I mean, come on, Carrie,
you can't keep going on
like this forever.
Now you just sound
like my mom.
Let's do our toes in Lit.
It's the people,
good, honest people,
who work hard to pay their taxes
and deserve an honest voice
to represent them in city hall.
I'll meet you downstairs.
I'm gonna put
my bathing suit on.
OK.
One who would never compromise
the safety of our streets
and who knows what it means
to live in a neighborhood
where our children
can safely play and grow up,
where neighbors look out
for one another.
Because in Blythwood District,
we care.
Madeline Cooper cares.
Blair!
Hi. Um, I'd like to
report an emergency.
Um, I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
Yeah, Mom, I'll meet you there.
OK.
I don't understand how the
extension cord got in there.
I mean, it could have
been the wind.
Blair could have knocked it in
herself without knowing it.
Mom, I...
What?
I've learned things
about Mrs. Cooper,
not what she did to you.
And, uh, I've been using
them to get back at her.
What do you... What do
you mean? What things?
She's having an affair
with Mr. Cooper's stepfather.
And you know this for a fact?
I wouldn't say it if I didn't.
Mom, we know she's
all about appearances.
Look what she did to you.
I mean, do you think...
You're right about
who Madeline is.
But, honey, what
happened to Blair,
that was an accident.
Are you sure?
I don't doubt that Madeline
paid off that campaign worker.
OK? But she would never
do something like this.
I mean, just to cover
up an affair?
Because all Madeline is
is a bored housewife
with nothing better to do.
OK?
Come on.
Let's go inside.
OK.
I'll meet you in there.
OK.
Carrie? Hey...
Do you have a second?
I'm sorry about your friend.
What do you know
about my wife's affair?
Um...
I'm sorry,
Mr. Cooper.
Thank you.
Hey, you!
I just made a batch of iced tea.
I can make you a Long Island,
and we could go have
dinner on the back deck.
What do you say?
Is he mine?
Is Daniel my boy?
What are you talking about?
Of course he's your boy!
Here, try this. Tell me
if it needs more sugar.
'Cause the doctors said
it was me, not you.
That's... that's why
we couldn't get pregnant.
I know.
Sweetie, that's why he said it
was a miracle that it happened.
And sometimes, they do happen
to good people like us.
Mmm!
Yeah, it needs
a touch more sugar.
I don't get it.
I don't get it.
How... how could you
do this, Madeline?
With him of all people?
John...
Have you been talking
to that girl next door?
Because I think we need
to file charges.
Everything she's said
about the neighbors,
everything she's said
has been true, Madeline,
and you know it.
I mean, come on, you're the best
neighborhood watch on the block!
But you didn't count on someone
watching you, now, did you?
She's a liar, John.
She's a 17-year-old
lying little bitch
who gets what she wants by
manipulating and distorting...
I can't get you
pregnant, Madeline!
- I, uh...
- We... We tried.
And then we tried
again and again.
And then your miracle happened.
I... I know!
And I wanted to believe.
God, I wanted to believe
that we were that...
We were that lucky couple.
So I didn't question it.
Why would I question it?
Why would I question my wife,
who I wanted to see happy
more than anything
in the whole world?
Honey, I...
We're not that
lucky couple, are we?
And I... God,
I was so blind.
But now...
God!
I just... I never thought
the truth would be so ugly.
John, he's your son.
Stop.
He is Clark's son.
Not mine.
John!
Of course he's your son!
You were there when he was born.
He...
You were...
You held him all night
when he got his first tooth.
He has your real father's name.
Yeah, but he doesn't have any
of my DNA, does he? Hmm?
Well, come on, Madeline!
It'd be real easy to find out!
You don't understand, John!
Listen, listen, listen, listen!
Sweetheart, Clark is
everything you know he is:
a selfish narcissist
who needs his ego stroked,
and he wouldn't let me go.
He is my stepfather!
Why?
Look at me.
Why?
Tell me why. Why him?
I swear, I swear to God,
I met him before I met
you, before college.
I needed a way out of my life.
I needed a way
out of that house.
That house, that street,
I had to go.
And I couldn't do it, not
without a mountain of debt.
Oh my... He was
your sugar daddy?
No, no, he... Listen,
he helped me, John.
He paid for everything,
and I started fresh.
And then I met you...
And then I met you.
And then when I realized who
he was... And I tried.
I mean, I tried
so hard to end it,
but then he threatened
to tell you.
I didn't know
what to do anymore.
Oh, I see. You
tried so hard, huh?
You tried so hard you had to
go back to him for more money
so you could push
your own agenda?
No!
No, John, listen. Please!
We can fix this.
No!
We can fix this.
I know we can. Listen to me!
Listen to me!
John, please!
You...
You little bitch!
Oh!
Why couldn't it have
been you in that pool?
I mean, every damn day,
you're out there!
What the hell is going on?
She slapped her. I saw it.
What gives you the right to
think you can touch my daughter?
Oh! You, really?
You're gonna judge me.
Really? Oh, and you.
Oh, all of you, please! Please!
I'm the one who
watches your houses.
I'm the one that keeps
our property values high.
Who makes this street safe
for our kids every single day?
Me! I do it!
You just stay in your houses
with your dirty little secrets
while I have to come
out here every day
and keep this street clean.
I mean, why is it so hard
to pull your damn weeds?
Hey?
You're just spreading,
spreading your
bad seed everywhere.
There.
Now it's perfect.
Remember why I do this.
It's because Cooper cares.
Hey! How did it go?
Well, I guess it's
like they say:
You're old news
when there's good news,
'cause I got the job.
Mmm!
I mean, it's only entry level,
but there's room to grow.
Oh, that's so great, Mom!
Listen, our new
neighbors have arrived.
You should go say hi.
Yeah.
OK.
Go.
Hey!
I'm Carrie.
I live next door.
Oh! Nice to
meet you, Carrie!
I'm Jenny. This is
my husband, Peter.
- Hi! And who's this?
- This is Jessica!
- She's so cute!
- Oh, thank you.
Well, welcome
to the neighborhood.
And if you ever
need a babysitter,
just knock on my door.
I was a nice young girl
I was lost too much
I was a nice young girl
I had hope
Too much
I was a teenager
I was a teenager
You could be
In love
I was a teenager
Closed Captions: MELS
Hey!
Jeez, Blair! You scared
the crap out of me!
Sorry! I saw a
neighborhood watch outside.
So, I didn't want her to see me
coming through the front door,
so I slid in the back.
How was the pool party?
Eh, Megan's parents
came home early,
so you really didn't miss much.
Well, I wasn't
invited, remember?
You still could have come!
And forget they were
all jerks about my mom?
No, thank you! I'd rather
make the babysitting money.
Care, they aren't even
talking about that anymore, OK?
Really?
'Cause Brady sent me a text
asking if I could
sexually harass him too.
Well, Brady acts like
a 12-year-old idiot,
so forget about it, all right?
Come on! Don't they have
any good food here?
I can't just
forget about it, B.
Someone set up my mom!
And whoever did it is obviously
from this neighborhood.
I just have to figure
out who it was.
OK... Well, did you
find anything in here?
No!
Just this.
Get out!
Oh yeah.
And they have a set
of cuffs by their bed.
Kinky!
Did you find any skanky videos?
No. They don't
even have Netflix.
Wow. No snacks
and no streaming.
Hope they pay you decent.
Only if he pays.
The wives are always cheap.
Well, not if they
come home drunk,
like Janice Murphy.
Why don't you
give her my number?
She remarried some guy
who has a teenager,
so she doesn't need
a sitter anymore.
- Hmm.
- Or a friend like this!
Ugh!
They're home!
Oh my God!
OK! I'll text you later.
You're lying to me on the day
of your daughter's recital.
Why am I lying?
What am I lying about?
You know I do business
outside the office.
David, we'll talk
about it later.
- Yeah.
- Hey!
Carrie, I'm so sorry.
We're a bit late.
Oh, no, that's OK.
It's still summer break for me.
- How was Emma?
- Great!
She didn't complain
at all at bedtime.
Great. Well, that's 'cause
you're so good with her.
Uh, Viv, I'm short on cash.
I got it.
Thank you, Carrie.
- Thank you.
- See you across the street.
Good night, Mrs. Kelly!
Have a good night!
I feel like
you're not hearing me
and you're not listening to me!
I feel very, like...
You're in another world
all the time.
You're just working.
And... and the lying!
Like, I... I understand
that you had a meeting today,
but I don't understand why...
Carrie!
Isn't it past your curfew?
I was babysitting
for the Kellys.
Again? Hmm...
I don't blame Vivian
for being upset with David.
I'd be angry too if my husband
lied to me about golfing
instead of going to
his daughter's recital.
How do you know that's
what they're fighting about?
I saw David leaving for work
today with his golf clubs.
A wife's got a right to know
what her husband's up to.
But I need you to
make us the priority.
She should be the priority.
Thank you for removing
that sign from your lawn.
Vandalism just makes
the neighborhood so ugly.
Good night.
Bitch.
A 9-year-old metro girl
has a new lease on life,
thanks to...
Hey!
I didn't hear you
come in last night.
Yeah, the Kellys didn't
get home till after midnight.
Sorry, there's
not much to eat.
I'll bring some groceries
home from work.
Someone, uh, left one
of your old campaign posters
on the front lawn last night.
I thought people
were done with it.
You know, I'm sure as soon as
this next campaign ramps up,
they will be.
Is that douche working
another campaign?
I don't know.
Well, I hope someone accuses
him of sexual harassment
and screws his career.
Oh, Carrie...
Come on, please.
Let's put this behind us, OK?
I'll see you tonight.
OK.
Advertisers are often faced
with the problem
of catching
respectful customers.
Well, take the case of...
Mom!
Thank you, sweetheart.
Hey! Good luck
on your job interview.
Thank you.
I will see you later.
Mmm! We'll be waiting!
- I love you!
- I love you!
Have a great day
at work, sweetie!
Carrie, hey!
Sorry, I forgot
to ask you last night:
Are you free to
babysit on Saturday?
I need to meet David downtown
for dinner at 6:00,
so I need you
for 5:00?
Another date night, Vivian?
It's actually
David's birthday.
Well, I wouldn't get him any
more golf clubs if I were you!
It's no problem,
Mrs. Kelly.
I'll see you at 5:00.
Oh, and thanks to me,
they put that stop sign
I lobbied for
at the top of the street.
Thank you, Madeline!
I would have preferred a gate,
keep the riff-raff out,
but anything to better
our neighborhood, huh?
Right.
See you Saturday, Carrie!
See you Saturday!
Off to work, Brad?
So, what's this job
you're interviewing for?
Just, like, a part-time
job at the coffee house
to help out my mom.
She says we're fine, but I...
Like, I know we're not.
OK, well, what about your dad?
Can't he help out with anything?
Blair, my dad's been
MIA for, like, 10 years.
I wouldn't do that to my mom.
Well, I think
this whole thing sucks.
I know your mom.
She would never
hit on some 25 year old
with a hard-on for politics.
No, there's no way.
I just wish I knew who did it.
Yeah.
Excuse me, ladies!
Do you mind keeping it down?
Daniel is such a light napper,
and he'll be cranky
if he wakes up too soon.
Could she be
any more annoying?
No, she treats that kid
like he's God's gift
and she's Mother Theresa.
She made my mom take down
all her birdhouses
'cause she didn't like that
they were crapping on her deck.
- No. Seriously?
- Yeah. Trust me.
She would lobby to ban
birds from the neighborhood
if she could.
Hey! Let me drive you
to your interview later
so that we can hang out longer.
Cool?
- OK.
- OK.
Oh! Have you seen the meme
of the dog and the vacuum?
You're gonna lose it.
Look at this.
How good is that?
I seriously watched this,
like, 100 times.
Maybe I'll come in
and have an iced mocha
while you do your interview.
Yeah.
What the hell?
What's going on?
Why are they towing my car?
Looked to me like the car was
parked too close to the hydrant.
That, or somebody thought
it was meant for the junk yard.
Are you serious?
My job interview!
I'm gonna be so late.
Oh, I have to go.
Blair, I'm so sorry!
I'll call you later!
OK!
Carrie! Is everything
all right? It's late!
Did your job interview go OK?
Blair's car got towed,
so I was late.
Oh! I'm sorry,
sweetie.
Excuse me! Do you mind
not overpacking the bag?
Sorry.
I'm sure it was
Mrs. Cooper who called.
The hydrant was
in front of her house.
Does it matter who called?
No, no. Don't put
the bread at the bottom.
Sorry.
Mom, seriously.
I can't do anything
without her shoving her nose
in my business, our business!
Have a nice night!
Look, I know that
she can be a busybody,
but she is our neighbor, OK?
We just have to
tolerate her for now.
Yeah, I know.
I'm sorry. I...
I'm just venting.
Oh, I'm sorry.
You shouldn't have to worry
about getting a job so much.
Like you shouldn't
be bagging groceries.
Hey, there is no
shame in it, right?
I'm just doing what I
have to do right now.
We both just have to
make the best of it, OK?
Do you want to wait
till my shift's over?
I can give you a ride home.
No, it's OK.
I'm gonna take the bus.
OK...
Carrie...
Just remember,
nobody is perfect,
no matter how green
their grass is.
Did you see
the urns out in front?
I thought they'd look perfect
if I added a little
nightshade to them.
Oh, thank you.
Um, well, what did you do
to the ones last year?
I liked those.
The hydrangeas?
Yeah, I could pot those instead.
You know, you should do
whatever you like, Maddie.
You always make
the place look great.
Oh, by the way, I have to fly
to Chicago next week.
Mmm! Again?
Maddie, it's the job.
I know. It's just...
It's so quiet without you here.
Well, I'm sure you've got
something going on,
I mean, some lobby or crusade.
Actually...
I'm seriously thinking
about running for councilor
in this next election.
That way, I could lobby to
have our little street gated,
something our
neighbor pooh-poohed
when she was councilor.
Well, I think running
is a fantastic idea.
I gotta take this.
I'm sorry.
Mark, hey! Yeah,
no, I got the email.
But, uh, a couple
deal points were missing.
Yeah.
When you go off the track
There's really nothing
more to say
You've moved out now
All right, Emma!
Now, when you're batting,
throw your bat
over your shoulder,
bend your knees,
swing all the way through.
OK?
Aim right here,
in this general area.
You got this. Go.
I'll get it.
That was awesome.
That deserves a Popsicle.
Mmm!
There you go, heavy hitter!
- Thanks!
- Oh!
When did you get that?
I don't know.
OK, I'll go get
something to clean it up.
I'm sorry.
I... I was just looking
for a Band-Aid.
OK...
I'm sorry. I don't
know how she did it.
Don't be sorry.
I appreciate the time
you take with Emma.
So, here, take this.
Think of it as a bonus.
See you when I get home!
- Bye, Mommy!
- Be good!
Mm-hmm!
I can't believe
you actually busted her.
I mean, how awkward was that?
Well, more for her than me.
Then, she, like, paid me off
to forget about it.
Well, if I was a PTA mom,
I don't think I'd want people
knowing I was a cokehead.
In fact, I bet she'd pay
a lot more money than that
to keep it quiet.
So, what? I just ask her
for more money?
No, tell her you
raised your rates.
She'll get it.
It's just payback for
all of those people
who were so quick to cast stones
and judge your mom.
Including her, I'm sure.
And I bet there's a lot
more people like her
living in those
pretty glass houses.
I was a nice young girl
I was lost too much
Hey, Mrs. Kelly!
Need a hand?
Thanks, Carrie,
but this is the last of it.
Well, I was just coming
by to say thank you again
for your bonus yesterday.
I told you, Carrie.
We appreciate you.
I know.
Which is great,
because I was gonna tell you
that I raised my hourly rate,
you know, to help my mom.
And, I mean, I-I guess you
could hire somebody cheaper,
but I doubt they would know you
and your habits as well as I do.
Of course we wouldn't
hire someone else.
Just let me know what
your new rate is,
and I'll be happy to pay.
Great!
I was a nice young girl
You were so right.
They totally went for it.
And so did the Pattersons!
What dirt do you have on them?
Just that Mr. Patterson
pretends to go to work every day
because he doesn't want
anyone on the street
to know he was fired for fraud.
No way! Seriously?
I found his termination papers
when I was babysitting.
Wow! You are the boss.
I kind of am.
The only thing that
would make this better
is if I could find
something that'll tell me
who set my mom up,
because, you're right,
no one should judge when
everyone has something to hide.
Madeline?
I'll be right down!
So, I suggested they buy
the stock at six five.
Mm-hmm.
And they hesitated.
But then, I convinced them.
And now, it just
sold just over ten.
Ah! Honey!
That is so great.
They must have been so happy.
Yeah, I mean, I think so.
They're booking a holiday.
You know, we should do that too.
Hmm.
Just go away for a night,
just the two of us.
But who would
look after Daniel?
Well, we'd find someone.
What about Carrie next door?
She babysits, right?
She does. But overnight?
I don't know if I can trust him
with someone for that long.
Oh, come on.
You...
Other than nursery school,
you never even leave him.
Hey, you've got
a degree in marketing.
You're too smart
for just baby talk.
I know.
Which is why I have formally
thrown my hat in the ring
for councilor.
That should keep me busy,
don't you think?
Cheers!
- Mmm.
- Mmm!
Hello? This is she.
Right, I understand.
OK. I'll come by tomorrow.
Everything OK?
My mother is fighting
her physio nurse.
They think she'd respond better
with me there,
so looks like I'll need
a sitter after all!
Oh.
Carrie! Come in.
Thanks.
You know, I think
this is the first time
you've been in my home.
What do you think?
It's nice.
Nice?
You know, my house was
featured in the Blythwood Post.
- Oh, that's great!
- Thank you.
Can you believe I've never used
a babysitter before?
I mean, Daniel goes
to nursery school,
but that's different.
There are qualified
ECE teachers watching him.
Now, on the fridge
is my cell phone
and my mom's landline
and a list of dos
and don'ts for Daniel.
Why don't you read it
while I check on him?
Sure.
So, Daniel's still napping,
but there are two-way
monitors in most rooms,
so you'll hear when he wakes up.
Now, I'll be gone
for a few hours.
But if you're available,
I'll need you at the same time
for the next couple of weeks.
- I'll be there!
- Great!
Daniel's dinner is in
the fridge. Don't overheat it.
Mom? It's me!
- Hey!
- It's her, B.
That bitch next door,
she's the one
that set up my mom.
- Are you sure?
- Yes!
Why else would she have photos
of my mom and that douche
who said she harassed him?
So, what are you gonna do?
I'm gonna keep babysitting
until I find everything I can.
And then I'm gonna throw
a few stones of my own.
Daniel, sweetheart!
Mommy's back!
Corn on the cob
coming right up!
Oh, no!
No! No, no!
He can't have
sugar after 6:00!
Didn't you read the list?
Here, although I don't
know what I'm paying for
if you can't take
simple instruction.
Um, actually,
Mrs. Cooper,
all the other neighbors
pay me $20 an hour.
Carrie, you're lucky
I'm not docking you
for the cost of fixing
the dent in my car
when you were in charge of Emma.
Well, what about
the towing cost
for my friend's car?
That was a safety hazard.
After all, what if it was your
house that was burning down,
and the firefighters
couldn't get to the hydrant,
and your poor mom had to watch
all that she has left
go up in smoke?
Wouldn't that just be awful?
After already losing so much.
I'll see you next week!
Same time.
Mm-hmm.
And I can see monsieur there
is someone who likes
his food very delicious.
It was her.
It's her fault
you had to step down.
Now you can prove
you were set up.
I mean, Carrie, these still...
They don't prove anything.
How can you say that?
Why else would she have
pictures of you with this guy?
She must have hired
a detective or something
to take pictures
and dig up dirt.
What if it
was her? Hmm?
Well, what if it
was someone else?
What if it was...
Oh my God!
What if it was
a conspiracy of people
trying to get me to step down?
Carrie, you're never gonna
change people's views.
Because once you've been judged
by the court of public opinion,
that's it!
It's over.
- I don't believe that.
- Ah!
I know it was her.
And she should pay,
just like you did.
Madeline!
Can I help you with something?
Actually, you can.
What is your experience
with Carrie?
I mean, aside from her doing
what I informed her not to do,
I almost feel like
she's extorting me
with her babysitting rates.
I mean, $20 an hour?
Do you pay that?
Madeline, what we pay
Carrie is our business.
Personally, we feel you
can't pay too high a price
for good childcare.
Oh! Well, I guess
I wouldn't know.
I don't rely on other
people to watch my child
as much as you do,
so I guess I'm just
out of the babysitting loop.
- Mmm.
- OK! Thanks!
- Hey!
- Hey!
Did you fill my
car up with gas?
Yeah. The Kellys
raised my rate.
Hey! You know,
I have the night off.
Do you wanna binge watch
something like we used to?
Sure.
OK. I'll make popcorn.
OK.
See you down there.
Carrie, hi!
Ah! I'm sorry.
I meant to call you earlier,
but my day has just
gotten away from me.
But I won't be
needing you anymore.
Excuse me?
I need someone
who follows instructions.
I went to a babysitting service.
I mean, they aren't
cheap either,
but they're bonded and vetted,
so I don't mind paying.
Yeah, it's just
that I actually canceled
another babysitting job
to make this work.
I'm sorry, but I... I already
have someone here.
I'm sure you understand.
And there's a list
on the fridge!
Whoo!
Hey, B.
You're not gonna believe
what the witch next door
just pulled.
No, I'm coming over right now.
Daniel!
Daniel!
He's wearing a blue polo
and beige overalls.
And he's carrying a train.
He always has his toy train.
- Uh-huh. OK.
- Thank you.
- John...
- Hey.
I looked everywhere,
the whole neighborhood,
the school, the park...
- I know.
- I don't know where he is.
We'll find him, I promise.
- We have to!
- I know!
I'm so sorry.
Get away from us!
Hey...
What's going on?
Daniel's wandered
off somewhere.
What do you mean? How?
Where was the babysitter?
Getting dinner or
something. I don't know.
I'll help look for him.
Thank you.
That'd be fantastic.
Yeah, no problem.
- I have to get inside.
- No, OK. Yeah.
- Hey.
- Hey.
Daniel!
Daniel!
Daniel!
Daniel!
Daniel!
Daniel!
Daniel?
Daniel!
Daniel!
Mama!
It's OK. It's OK,
baby. It's OK.
You stay here. It's OK!
I saw the amber alert.
What time are your
parents coming home?
I told you, later,
but I'm not worried
about them catching us!
No one will catch us, OK?
Everyone's gonna
think I'm a hero.
Then I'll have my way
back in with the Coopers.
It's gonna be fine.
Well, I hope it was worth it.
OK.
- Mama!
- Yeah!
Mama!
The gate was locked.
I'm sure of it.
Unless that sitter opened it.
She's such a stupid girl!
No, we'll find him.
- Oh my God! Daniel!
- Daniel! Daniel!
Oh my God! Oh my God!
Daniel, baby! Oh, come here!
Come here!
Where were you?
Where did you go?
I know he loves trains.
I checked by the tracks,
and he was there!
What do you mean?
What was he doing?
He was playing with his train!
And no one saw him?
I guess not!
I don't know.
Carrie, we can't tell
you how grateful we are.
No.
It's OK.
I... I'm just so glad
we found him.
Listen, uh, the police,
they're probably gonna
wanna speak to you, OK?
Yeah, yeah. I know.
- Thank you. Thank you again!
- Yeah.
And... and believe me,
from now on,
nobody takes care of our kid
except for you, OK?
OK.
Hey, buddy!
Hey...
Hey.
You coming to bed?
Yeah.
I just wanted
to check on him again.
Maddie, you're not
gonna be able to watch him
for every minute of every day.
And now everyone
is going to think
I'm like Vivian
across the street,
neglectful of her child.
No.
No one's gonna think that.
And even if they do, who cares?
'Cause it's never
gonna happen again.
We're gonna make sure he's
always in the best hands.
Never.
I still can't believe
she just found him.
Well, thankfully, she did.
Come to bed.
I will.
I promise.
OK.
Now, don't forget, no sugar.
And don't let him
out of your sight.
In fact, just... just
stay in the house.
I've locked all the doors:
the back door, the gate...
You have everything
you need here, so...
We'll be fine.
I promise.
Now, unfortunately,
I'll be at my mother's
a little longer today.
I should be back
no later than 10:00.
Uh, so, is Mr. Cooper around
in case of emergency?
He's away on business.
And you're just gonna be
at your mom's the whole time?
I'm only asking in case you
want to throw another number
up there on the fridge.
If you need me,
just call me on my cell.
Great.
Blair?
Yeah, I'm gonna need
another favor.
Do you wanna try
another cookie?
Do you want another cookie?
You already have two.
Mmm!
When I was a kid
I was a wit
So nobody wanted me around
My mom loved me
My dad loved me
But I still felt like
I needed a friend
I'll be moving my
mother into a home next week,
so the house needs to be put
on the market ASAP.
I don't care what
you sell it for,
'cause personally, I think
this place should be condemned.
I wanted you to be
I'm sure you can understand
why I can't stay long.
Oh, sweetheart,
don't make it sound like
you're doing me a favor.
Madeline!
You know you wouldn't be
where you are without me, huh?
Carrie...
Carrie?
There you are.
How is he?
Asleep.
Good.
Anyway, I won't be
needing you next week,
as my mom's being moved
to a home, but thank you.
Actually, I don't think
this will quite cover it.
I've paid your
new rate, Carrie,
even if I do think
it's extortion.
I think you owe me
and my mom a lot more.
Really? And
how is that?
I saw the photos
you took of her.
So, you've been going
through my things?
Good to know.
What are you doing?
I hardly think you need
to be paid for snooping.
- You set my mom up!
- I did nothing of the sort.
But if someone did,
maybe they thought your mom
wasn't doing a good enough job
for the neighborhood.
I mean, do you know the taxes
we pay to live here?
My mom lost her job,
people's respect.
You need to go now, Carrie.
I saw you with him.
What exactly did you see?
Doesn't matter.
'Cause we know that people
are so quick to judge.
It most definitely
matters, Carrie.
So, what did you see?
When did you see it?
And what does it prove?
Why aren't you answering me?
Is it because you were somewhere
you weren't supposed to be?
Because leaving a child
unattended is a crime.
Go home, Carrie.
I'm sure your husband
would love to know
what you were up to.
Really?
And what's he gonna say to that,
when you have no
evidence of any kind?
Besides, he's been
screwing his assistant
for the last 3 years,
so I doubt he'd have
much to say about it anyway.
You're done.
You miss me already?
Someone knows, Clark.
And everything you've done for
me will have been for nothing
if it all comes out,
so we're done.
Then you asked me
for another $25,000.
So we're done
when I say we're done.
So, how skanky
was this lingerie?
Are we talking
bondage style or...
Skanky enough.
I just wish I saw him.
Wow! That is some tacky
bling he's got going on.
But it's not a wedding ring,
so he's less of
a douche than she is.
Yeah, well, I wish
I had gotten a photo of her,
and not this ugly ring.
I can't really do
anything with this.
So, what are you gonna do?
I'm gonna get her
the proof she wants.
Ugh! Well,
good luck with that.
I doubt she's gonna let
you into her home again.
No, she won't.
But her husband will.
Hey!
Oh! Hey, neighbor!
Hey, listen, I've been
meaning to pop over
and properly thank you
for finding Daniel.
No, thank you, but I
can't take that.
It means enough to know
I'm your number-one sitter.
That's right!
Because you found Daniel!
Sweetheart, what do you think
of this as a campaign slogan?
"Cooper cares."
What campaign?
Oh, well, Maddie's
running for councilor.
I mean, I'm sure she's spoken
to your mother about it, right?
Actually, I haven't
had the chance.
Don't worry.
I'll let her know.
Hey, uh, Carrie,
if you're free,
we have a retirement
party tomorrow
And, uh, I mean, I'd love it if
you could take care of Daniel.
- Of course. I'll see you then!
- Great!
I un-I understand.
Yeah, if you could
just give me 30 days,
then I could pay
last month's taxes
and this month...
No, I can't tomorrow. I work.
Yeah. OK, bye.
- What was that about?
- Oh, nothing, honey.
Just juggling some things.
You know, Mr. Cooper
offered me money
for finding Daniel.
I could take it.
Well, if he does
it again, you should.
You should keep it.
You deserve it.
You know, Mrs. Cooper
is running for councilor.
Maybe that was her
plan all along.
Ah!
We just have to hope
she doesn't win.
You know she's gonna
do everything she can
to make sure she does.
So, do I have
to attend this party?
Well, spouses are welcome,
so, yeah, it'd be nice.
Ah, crap.
Hey, do we have
a charge cord up here?
Should be one in the dresser.
Oh, hon, you know,
you really shouldn't have
told Anna you were running.
I mean, despite the whole
harassment debacle,
we still are neighbors.
Unfortunately.
So, how long
are we expected to stay?
Oh, not too long.
I wouldn't worry about it.
Carrie's proven to be reliable,
certainly trustworthy.
Actually, I'm not
so sure about that.
The night I went to see my mom,
she was clearly going
through our things.
Well, were you worried
she'd find this?
That was meant
to be a surprise.
Well, it still could be,
when you put it on.
Tonight?
Well then, it wouldn't
be a surprise,
now would it?
So you're just gonna
have to wait for it.
I tried knocking, but I figured
this is where you would be.
What do you want?
I just want to know more
about how you found Daniel
the other night.
It would give me peace of mind,
so I can make sure
it doesn't happen again.
I told you, I found him
by the tracks.
And what was he doing?
Playing, you know,
with his train.
- On the ground?
- Yeah.
In clear sight?
No, he was, um,
he was behind these,
like, crates there.
Oh. That's amazing!
I mean, what a coincidence
that you of all people
were able to find him
so effortlessly.
Yeah, well, you know,
Daniel and his train...
Just put two and two together.
That would make sense,
wouldn't it?
So much, you wouldn't
even question it,
except Daniel didn't have
any dirt on his clothes.
Not a spot.
Which is odd, don't you think,
if he was playing on the ground?
I know how much you
hate when he's dirty,
so I brushed him off for you.
How thoughtful of you.
Don't you have a party
to get ready for?
See you at 6:00!
Oh, hey, uh,
I should say hello.
OK.
Gentlemen...
How are you doing?
Better not be on my bill.
Listen, you guys just
keep it, you know...
All right.
That's back pay.
You remember Anita,
my assistant, right?
Mm-hmm.
She would never forgive me
if you didn't come say hello.
- Mmm.
- All right?
Anita! Oh, it's
been too long!
Madeline!
So good to see you!
Hide this, you bitch!
So, does Anita have any
thoughts on retirement?
Oh, no, she says as long
as she's still standing,
she's not retiring.
So, I don't have to worry
about some hot, young
assistant anytime soon?
Hey, Maddie...
You don't have to
worry about anyone.
I promise.
Is there anyone I
should be worried about?
Mmm, of course not.
Good.
Mmm.
Hey, Carrie!
Hey!
- How was everything?
- Great!
Yeah? Good.
Listen, I know you said
you couldn't just take it,
so, you know what?
Just consider it a bonus.
- Thank you, Mr. Cooper.
- You're welcome.
Oh, and, um, Mrs. Cooper,
I forgot to mention,
the other night, when you
were out after your mom's
the motel called, said you
left something in the room.
Yes, I retrieved it.
Thank you, Carrie.
Good night.
- Good night.
- Good night.
Well, I think that you
were right about Carrie!
Everything seems
really great here!
Huh. When were
you in a hotel?
Uh, I think that was
when you were in Boston.
And what were you
doing there exactly?
I was meeting
with a campaign manager.
Fiona Scott?
She was Dwight's manager
in Borel County.
She was passing through,
and agreed to meet me!
Oh. And?
And, mmm...
Turns out our schedules
don't really match.
But sounds like Daniel
is fast asleep, so...
So...
So, have you
showed your mom yet?
No, she, uh, she
already left for work
when I got up
this morning, so...
But she's home now.
What's going on?
Blair, you should go home, OK?
Carrie will call you later.
OK.
Carrie, Mrs. Cooper
would like to give you
an opportunity to
explain your behavior.
What behavior?
Stealing, destroying
personal property.
You installed
security cameras?
Why would you do that?
I'd say it was necessary.
Wouldn't you think?
Mrs. Cooper should
come clean about what she did.
Carrie, that is not
what this is about.
No, it is what
this is about, Mom.
She wrote a check, Mom,
for $25,000, to William Beck.
See?
She paid him off to say
you harassed him!
I don't think it's a crime
to donate towards a young man's
political ambitions,
but as far as what Carrie did,
I wouldn't be out of line
to notify the police.
Madeline, that isn't
going to be necessary.
I don't know.
Is it?
Who's to say she hasn't
violated our other neighbors
in the same way?
I have no problems
with the other neighbors.
Well, I'd like to think
that you're telling the truth,
but in case you aren't,
I'll agree not to
go to the police,
as long as you agree
to stop babysitting.
I use that money
to help my mom,
and I wouldn't have to
if it weren't for you.
Carrie, Carrie...
I don't think that Mrs. Cooper's
request is unreasonable.
Of course, she will pay
for the damage to your floors.
And I think that
we can all agree
that nobody needs to
know the circumstances
of why she stopped babysitting.
Of course.
I can understand why you
wouldn't want another scandal
plaguing your house.
You are such a hypocrite!
- I'll walk you to the door.
- Thank you.
Madeline!
We both know you
don't give a damn
about that boy's ambitions.
So, let's call us even, OK?
Mom...
I was just trying to find
something, and I did.
And now you can
prove it was her!
Carrie, you have got to stop.
Because all you're doing now
is sabotaging your own future.
So, you're not
gonna do anything?
What do you want me to do?
I've told you that it isn't
gonna make any difference.
So what else is there?
Do you want to move?
Do you...
Do you want me to sell
the only thing that I
have worth anything?
Because that isn't
gonna help right now!
Don't you think that
I want to rip her head off?
Because I didn't support
her views on condos
and I didn't lobby
for a stupid gate!
But then what?
She's still our neighbor.
Oh, Carrie, you have
got to let this go!
Because the person
that I saw on that video...
that is not you.
I can't say I'm surprised
that you're gonna run
for council, Madeline.
You do so much
for the community already.
Well, I think we can all agree
we want our kids to grow up
in the best neighborhood
in the city.
Mmm!
Speaking of which, I caught
our neighborhood sitter, Carrie,
snooping in my house.
Thankfully, I don't have
any secrets to hide.
Not like you.
What are you talking about?
Oh, come on, Vivian.
You don't think I notice
that strange car that pulls up
to your house every week,
by a driver whom you
never welcome inside?
I mean, I'm not surprised,
based on his appearance.
Although, you do seem
very happy to give him cash,
in exchange for, what, pills?
Coke?
I'm gonna go with cocaine,
based on how dilated
your pupils are.
Your accusations
are offensive, Madeline.
Really?
Is the reason
you pay Carrie so much
because she found something
when she was watching Emma?
If you tell me,
I'd be less inclined to voice
my concerns with your husband.
It's not something
I'm proud of, Madeline.
Of course not.
Is that all Carrie
wanted from you? Money?
I think so.
You're not gonna
tell David, are you?
I mean, I'm trying
to get a handle on it.
Just clean up
your act, Vivian.
'Cause I don't pay the taxes
I do to live across the street
from a junkie who brings trash
into my neighborhood.
And if it's not taken care of
by the time I run for council,
Child Services may just
be getting a call.
Hey, Mr. Cooper!
How's Daniel?
He's fine, Carrie, despite us
putting our trust in you.
Hey, I'm sorry
about what I did.
I was just upset
with Mrs. Cooper
for what she did to my mom,
and now what she's doing to you.
Are you talking about
the affair, Carrie?
Because she told me
all about it,
about how you tried to extort
money from her and the neighbors
with your lies.
So you could get,
what, $20 an hour?
I didn't make it up,
any of it. I swear!
She paid off that
campaign worker $25,000.
Enough, Carrie.
The lingerie she was
wearing the other night,
she wore it at the motel.
Just ask her.
It's catchy, don't you think?
And pretty soon,
they'll be everywhere.
Oh, I think I just
heard a car pull up.
- Hey, John! How are you?
- Good!
And where is
that future councilor?
There she is!
Love the sign,
but, uh, that smile,
so much better in person!
Happy birthday, Clark!
It's nice to see you.
Well, what?
No birthday hug from
the prettiest girl I know?
Next to your mom, of course.
She was the most beautiful
woman in the room.
How are you, Clark?
Good. Feeling like
a young lad these days.
John, do you want
to get a Clark a drink?
And I'm gonna go
check on Daniel.
What can I get you?
So, how's business?
Profits are the best
they've ever been!
At this rate,
I won't be able to spend it all
before I'm six feet under.
Although I do my best to
spread the wealth around.
You should get remarried.
That way, you could have
a partner to keep you company
and help spend your money.
Is that what Madeline
does, John?
Spend your money?
Actually, she'll be too busy
when she wins the election.
Yeah, well, careful
what you wish for.
I sure as hell don't know
if I'd want to get
into politics these days.
Oh yeah? Why's that?
The dirt that they dig up...
I mean, whether it's true
or not, you know,
it can ruin you
before you even run.
Yeah, well, we've already
had a bit of practice
in that department, haven't we?
Really? What about?
Just a neighbor
who tried to extort
abhorrently high babysitting
rates by telling lies.
Oh, sounds like
a great entrepreneur!
Maybe I should give her a job.
Figures you'd see it that way.
You done with that?
Well, that was
a splendid evening!
I couldn't have
thought of a better way
to spend my birthday!
Well, we were
glad to have you.
Well, let's not leave it
so long next time, huh?
Carrie...
Can we help you?
I was just wondering
if you got a new car.
She's a beauty, huh?
Even though she does kind of
chew through my wallet in gas.
Ah, who cares
if it makes a statement?
Oh, let me guess.
The entrepreneur, right?
Mmm. I should go
check on Daniel.
Are you sure
you're OK to drive?
Are you kidding?
A couple of drinks aren't enough
to bring this guy down.
Huh? You didn't hear that!
Anyway, give that little
spitfire a kiss from Grandpa!
Mmm.
Who's texting you so late?
Just a reminder
to look at my campaign page
before it goes live.
Oh. OK.
Um, do you want me to get these?
No, I got it.
I'll come up to bed
as soon as I'm done down here.
- OK.
- OK.
I'm going up.
- Good night.
- Night.
Thank you.
So, when did you say
you were leaving
for your conference again?
Tomorrow, why?
I just wanted to make sure
I had it right in the calendar.
Ah, OK. Well, hey!
Uh, see you later.
- Oh. Bye, sweetie!
- Bye!
Great!
Now you can make plans
with your father-in-law.
He could even come here,
or would that be too weird,
you know, doing it
in your stepson's bed?
Carrie, keep this up,
and we will file
defamation charges.
The night I saw you,
I saw his big,
ugly ruby-red ring
on his fat old-man finger,
and I have
the photos to prove it.
Your photos prove nothing.
They may.
They may not.
I wouldn't test it,
though, if I were you.
'Cause wouldn't
that be a scandal?
One that I doubt
Mr. Cooper or your voters
would ever forgive you for.
Coming, Daniel!
Oh! Ah! Oh!
Her father-in-law?
Ew! That is so gross.
I know, right?
What is he, like, her
sugar daddy or something?
The money she used
to pay off that liar
had to come from somewhere.
And it's not like she has it.
I mean, you should see
where her mom lives.
Total skidsville.
I bet she used him
to get out of there.
Looks like Little Miss Perfect
isn't so perfect after all.
Hardly.
And I'm gonna use this to
totally screw with her.
Are you sure, Care?
Your mom knows what happened.
Maybe you should let her
deal with this on her own.
My mom's not
gonna do anything.
So it's all up to me.
Sorry, honey. I won't be
home until the morning, OK?
Why?
Oh, I'm just working a double.
Do you have to?
Just for now.
- OK.
- Yeah.
Uh, oh, there's, uh,
frozen pizza for dinner, OK?
I'll see you in the morning?
- OK. I love you.
- I love you.
Hello?
What was that?
Yes!
Uh-huh. I would love to do
a press interview via video.
When... Next week?
That would be great.
Thank you!
I thought I was bad
She worse
I thought I was bad
She worse
I keep her around
for a purpose
When she around,
you get nervous
I thought I was bad
She worse
I thought I was bad
She worse
I thought I was bad
She worse
I thought I was bad
She worse
I keep her around
for a purpose
Carrie, could you please
turn down the music?
I thought I was bad
She worse
Ah! What is it, Carrie?
What exactly are you after?
Huh? Is it money?
You know, a little extra
babysitting money
would be nice to help my mom.
But then I learned that you're
the reason why we're struggling.
I guess I could try to
extort more money from you,
but honestly,
I'd rather you know
what it's been like for my mom,
to have everyone look at you,
lose respect for you, shame you.
No one's ever gonna
believe you, Carrie.
And when I'm elected councilor,
I will do everything in my power
to get rid of trash
like you and your mother
from my neighborhood.
I thought I was bad
She worse
I thought I was bad
She worse
I keep her around
for a purpose
When she around,
you get nervous
I thought I was bad
She worse
I thought I was bad
She worse
I keep her around
for a purpose
Hey, sweetheart!
How are the meetings?
Interesting.
Really? How... how so?
You know what?
Let's just talk about it
when I get back, OK?
Anything I should
be concerned about or...
I don't know.
What's going on over there?
I hear Daniel.
It's that girl next door.
Her... her music's
keeping Daniel up.
And, of course,
her mother isn't home, so...
Right. Look, I gotta go.
Uh, I'll see you
Thursday night, OK?
- Bye, sweetheart!
- Bye.
I keep her around
for a purpose
Come here, honey!
You know Mommy doesn't like it
when everyone hears you crying.
I mean, we don't want people
thinking I'm a bad mommy!
No, do you? OK, Daniel, please.
Please, stop crying, sweetie.
Stop crying, sweetie.
Please, just stop it.
I mean, that's enough.
Just stop it.
Just stop it! Stop it!
I was right under the nose
like a moustache
I move crowds
a new sound
Leave them all speechless
then the hush happens
Shhh
What?
Saw the top tier list
when I read through it
That ass, would you
make some changes
I'd put red to it
Cross the bunch out
The rest put an X through it
It's not ill if my name
ain't next to it
They said you gotta do it
Gotta flow loose,
ooh, ooh
Carrie!
Carrie!
Hey yo
Ain't a snake
in the grass
And this ain't hip-hop
What are you doing?
I tried calling you,
but of course,
you couldn't hear me.
So, you entered through my
back door without me knowing
and looked through my phone?
Mmm...
Daniel hasn't slept all day.
And your music...
You're lucky that one
of the other neighbors
didn't call the police.
Really? 'Cause I did.
- Why?
- I was scared, Madeline.
Someone was in my house that
shouldn't have been here!
You're being
ridiculous, Carrie.
That's why I grabbed this.
I thought you were an intruder.
I hardly think calling
the police was necessary.
Oh. Like, how you threatened
to call the police on me?
You'll be lucky if
they don't arrest you.
I'm sure once I speak
to the police and explain that...
That you entered
through my back door
while I was home alone at night?
I mean, I was terrified
when I heard you.
I thought you were
gonna kill me.
Guess this is just another
thing you're gonna have
to explain
to Mr. Cooper.
By the way,
I have plenty of copies
of those photos you deleted.
You know, the ones
that prove nothing.
I'm sorry, officer.
I didn't mean to make
this such a big deal.
I was just scared.
Well, you did the right
thing by calling us.
And, obviously, it was
a misunderstanding.
I'm just glad I didn't
accidentally hurt Mrs. Cooper.
I guess that's why
you don't enter
into people's houses
without them knowing.
Just remember to keep your
doors locked at all times.
I will, thank you.
Good night!
Um, officer. Sorry, um...
Will there be
any report of this?
You see, I'm running
for councilor,
and even a misunderstanding
like this could be a problem
if my opponents got ahold of it.
Well, there will be a report.
But no charges were laid.
And the report will
state our names?
- It does.
- Oh. OK.
But I'm sure you
don't have to worry.
Oh. Then you don't
understand politics.
Thank you so much!
Hello?
Hi there! This is Gary Ross,
your local realtor.
I hear you're looking
to sell your home.
Actually, I'm... I'm not.
Where did you hear that from?
Uh, one of your neighbors,
who was obviously misinformed.
But if you change your mind...
OK, thanks. Bye.
What gives you
the right, Madeline?
I just got a call
from Gary Ross,
who told me that you told him
that I want to list my house.
I thought it would help you.
I mean, I see you're struggling
And I hear it's a
great time to sell.
You could get well over asking.
I'm struggling,
Madeline, because of you.
Because God forbid anybody
around here does something
that you don't like,
doesn't mow their lawn
or pick up after their dog.
And what was it you didn't
like that I didn't support?
That you wanted to put a gate
at the end of the street?
It would give the
neighborhood prestige.
Who wouldn't want that?
And when I'm elected,
I'll make sure that it happens.
Well, I mean, if you
are gonna make it
so prestigious around here,
my house value
should only go up!
I mean, why on earth
would I want to sell now?
Maybe because of all the press
that's gonna be around
once my campaign kicks in?
I'm sure they'll be very curious
what my disgraced
neighbor has been up to.
But if you want to
stick around, stay.
Is everything OK?
It is now.
Vivian, what is it?
It's your car.
Did you see who did this?
No. David and I noticed
when he left for work.
Why do you think
someone would do this?
How the hell would I know?
Is that why the police
were here the other night?
I told you, you bring
riff-raff into our neighborhood,
and this is exactly
what happens.
Make sure you don't scratch it.
Or she'll make you pay.
How did you explain this
to all the other neighbors?
Must have been
pretty embarrassing.
I have security
cameras outside
that'll show me if you
did this, Carrie.
Yeah, I figured.
Hope you didn't have anywhere
important to go.
This time, I will
call the police.
Maybe we should
think about moving.
I mean, obviously,
the neighborhood is going
to crap with all the vandals
and everything else going on.
You can't be
serious, Madeline.
This street is your life.
You're running for councilor,
for goodness sakes!
Yeah, well, I don't
even think as councilor,
I could turn this around.
Where is this coming from?
I told you!
No, I know what
you told me, Madeline!
Does this have something
to do with Carrie next door?
Of course not.
She's just a
manipulative teenager.
You know, I... I found out
that Brad Patterson,
he was let go.
His name came up
during my meetings,
and, uh, turns out,
no one wants to hire him
because of the fraud charge.
So she wasn't lying about that.
Well, she was lying
about everything else.
And you know what?
I even think she was lying
about finding Daniel.
You know, Maddie, it's
starting to sound like
you're the one who's
making the accusations.
I mean, maybe Vivian Kelly
does have a drug problem.
And Carrie would be
the one to know,
being there babysitting
all the time.
Just like here,
come to think of it.
I can't believe we're
having this conversation.
You should have seen it, B.
The neighbor across
the street came to watch,
and then all the others came.
Thought she was gonna
have a mental breakdown
right then and there.
Why don't you just get her
to like, buy you
a new car or something?
Call it a day?
And miss out on
all this fun? No way!
Let's go get our polish
so we can do our toes.
OK.
I think I'm gonna do
hot pink for the summer.
That would be cute!
Or, like, yellow.
Yeah, I'll put in
the bid right away.
You got it, Ron. Bye.
Mrs. Cooper,
are you still there?
I am!
Perfect! We're gonna go live
in ten seconds.
Great!
So, how far are you
gonna go with all this?
Until she's knocked
down off her pedestal.
Or until she moves.
As a ten-year resident
of the community,
I know what makes
Blythwood District so special.
Well, what if she doesn't?
I mean, come on, Carrie,
you can't keep going on
like this forever.
Now you just sound
like my mom.
Let's do our toes in Lit.
It's the people,
good, honest people,
who work hard to pay their taxes
and deserve an honest voice
to represent them in city hall.
I'll meet you downstairs.
I'm gonna put
my bathing suit on.
OK.
One who would never compromise
the safety of our streets
and who knows what it means
to live in a neighborhood
where our children
can safely play and grow up,
where neighbors look out
for one another.
Because in Blythwood District,
we care.
Madeline Cooper cares.
Blair!
Hi. Um, I'd like to
report an emergency.
Um, I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
Yeah, Mom, I'll meet you there.
OK.
I don't understand how the
extension cord got in there.
I mean, it could have
been the wind.
Blair could have knocked it in
herself without knowing it.
Mom, I...
What?
I've learned things
about Mrs. Cooper,
not what she did to you.
And, uh, I've been using
them to get back at her.
What do you... What do
you mean? What things?
She's having an affair
with Mr. Cooper's stepfather.
And you know this for a fact?
I wouldn't say it if I didn't.
Mom, we know she's
all about appearances.
Look what she did to you.
I mean, do you think...
You're right about
who Madeline is.
But, honey, what
happened to Blair,
that was an accident.
Are you sure?
I don't doubt that Madeline
paid off that campaign worker.
OK? But she would never
do something like this.
I mean, just to cover
up an affair?
Because all Madeline is
is a bored housewife
with nothing better to do.
OK?
Come on.
Let's go inside.
OK.
I'll meet you in there.
OK.
Carrie? Hey...
Do you have a second?
I'm sorry about your friend.
What do you know
about my wife's affair?
Um...
I'm sorry,
Mr. Cooper.
Thank you.
Hey, you!
I just made a batch of iced tea.
I can make you a Long Island,
and we could go have
dinner on the back deck.
What do you say?
Is he mine?
Is Daniel my boy?
What are you talking about?
Of course he's your boy!
Here, try this. Tell me
if it needs more sugar.
'Cause the doctors said
it was me, not you.
That's... that's why
we couldn't get pregnant.
I know.
Sweetie, that's why he said it
was a miracle that it happened.
And sometimes, they do happen
to good people like us.
Mmm!
Yeah, it needs
a touch more sugar.
I don't get it.
I don't get it.
How... how could you
do this, Madeline?
With him of all people?
John...
Have you been talking
to that girl next door?
Because I think we need
to file charges.
Everything she's said
about the neighbors,
everything she's said
has been true, Madeline,
and you know it.
I mean, come on, you're the best
neighborhood watch on the block!
But you didn't count on someone
watching you, now, did you?
She's a liar, John.
She's a 17-year-old
lying little bitch
who gets what she wants by
manipulating and distorting...
I can't get you
pregnant, Madeline!
- I, uh...
- We... We tried.
And then we tried
again and again.
And then your miracle happened.
I... I know!
And I wanted to believe.
God, I wanted to believe
that we were that...
We were that lucky couple.
So I didn't question it.
Why would I question it?
Why would I question my wife,
who I wanted to see happy
more than anything
in the whole world?
Honey, I...
We're not that
lucky couple, are we?
And I... God,
I was so blind.
But now...
God!
I just... I never thought
the truth would be so ugly.
John, he's your son.
Stop.
He is Clark's son.
Not mine.
John!
Of course he's your son!
You were there when he was born.
He...
You were...
You held him all night
when he got his first tooth.
He has your real father's name.
Yeah, but he doesn't have any
of my DNA, does he? Hmm?
Well, come on, Madeline!
It'd be real easy to find out!
You don't understand, John!
Listen, listen, listen, listen!
Sweetheart, Clark is
everything you know he is:
a selfish narcissist
who needs his ego stroked,
and he wouldn't let me go.
He is my stepfather!
Why?
Look at me.
Why?
Tell me why. Why him?
I swear, I swear to God,
I met him before I met
you, before college.
I needed a way out of my life.
I needed a way
out of that house.
That house, that street,
I had to go.
And I couldn't do it, not
without a mountain of debt.
Oh my... He was
your sugar daddy?
No, no, he... Listen,
he helped me, John.
He paid for everything,
and I started fresh.
And then I met you...
And then I met you.
And then when I realized who
he was... And I tried.
I mean, I tried
so hard to end it,
but then he threatened
to tell you.
I didn't know
what to do anymore.
Oh, I see. You
tried so hard, huh?
You tried so hard you had to
go back to him for more money
so you could push
your own agenda?
No!
No, John, listen. Please!
We can fix this.
No!
We can fix this.
I know we can. Listen to me!
Listen to me!
John, please!
You...
You little bitch!
Oh!
Why couldn't it have
been you in that pool?
I mean, every damn day,
you're out there!
What the hell is going on?
She slapped her. I saw it.
What gives you the right to
think you can touch my daughter?
Oh! You, really?
You're gonna judge me.
Really? Oh, and you.
Oh, all of you, please! Please!
I'm the one who
watches your houses.
I'm the one that keeps
our property values high.
Who makes this street safe
for our kids every single day?
Me! I do it!
You just stay in your houses
with your dirty little secrets
while I have to come
out here every day
and keep this street clean.
I mean, why is it so hard
to pull your damn weeds?
Hey?
You're just spreading,
spreading your
bad seed everywhere.
There.
Now it's perfect.
Remember why I do this.
It's because Cooper cares.
Hey! How did it go?
Well, I guess it's
like they say:
You're old news
when there's good news,
'cause I got the job.
Mmm!
I mean, it's only entry level,
but there's room to grow.
Oh, that's so great, Mom!
Listen, our new
neighbors have arrived.
You should go say hi.
Yeah.
OK.
Go.
Hey!
I'm Carrie.
I live next door.
Oh! Nice to
meet you, Carrie!
I'm Jenny. This is
my husband, Peter.
- Hi! And who's this?
- This is Jessica!
- She's so cute!
- Oh, thank you.
Well, welcome
to the neighborhood.
And if you ever
need a babysitter,
just knock on my door.
I was a nice young girl
I was lost too much
I was a nice young girl
I had hope
Too much
I was a teenager
I was a teenager
You could be
In love
I was a teenager
Closed Captions: MELS