Hard Rock Zombies (1985) Movie Script
I wanna hold your hand
- Well, come on!
Put your hands together!
I met a girl just the other night
She looked me over, told me she was uptight
I didn't know exactly what to do
But I thought I'd better make my move
I said my car's parked right outside
Let's try it out and baby go for a ride
Well, she said no, no, not quite yet
Listen to me, 'cause I'm so upset
I want love, but I can't unwind
I'm in a hurry, but I'm out of time
Well, won't you listen
Please, tell me what to do
I said, shake, shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake it out, babe, tonight
Yeah, shake, shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake it out baby, tonight
Whoa
She pulled me back and sat me in my chair
Said she doesn't like a quick affair
I said, babe, you know you got me all wrong
I just wanted you to go along
I wanna get you out of your mood
Life's too short for you to sit and stew
And in no world I could break your heart
'Cause you've been playing it much too smart
She said, I'm going crazy and don't know why
My head is spinning and I'm ready to cry
Won't you listen, please, tell me what to do
I said shake, shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake it out
- You know, this ain't music.
Shake, shake, shake it
Cow dying in shit.
- Who
- What
- Cow dying in shit.
Shake, shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake it out, baby, tonight
Come on
And she said I want love but I can't unwind
I'm in a hurry, but I'm out of time
Won't you listen, please, tell me what to do
Shake, shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake it out, babe, tonight
- Do we really want the children of Grand Guignol
listening to this kind of garbage
- No.
- No.
- No.
Shake, shake, shake it out, babe, tonight
You gotta shake, shake, shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake, shake it out, babe, tonight
All right!
Now! Yeah!
- Jessie, I need photos.
You know, girls screaming, climbing all over you.
Don Matson is Columbia Records, man.
He wants to see those kids insane.
- Listen, man, we are musicians,
you know, not day camp counselors.
- Now lookit, I busted my ass a year for this.
In three months, you'll be national.
No more shit towns and shit vans.
Come on, man, I need those photos
and I need 'em tonight,
so you get your butts out there.
- Forget it.
- Suit yourself.
Okay, girls, come on in.
Let's go.
Oh, don't fall down.
That's it.
- Baby!
- Beautiful.
Beautiful. - Where
- Oh, yeah, right there.
Put the "O" in the middle.
- Oh, my goodness. - Oh, beautiful, beautiful.
- Oh! - What am I supposed to do
- Jessie. - Jessie, sign those luscious,
nubile, tender, underaged tits, man.
- Right.
- Don't dot the "i" too hard.
- One time for you. - Is two inches
far enough away
- What's your name - Tommy, draw a picture.
- Picture, Ron There's enough room here
for the Gettysburg Address.
I might just -- - Yeah, well.
- Hey, you know, girls, soon, I'm gonna be a Mormon
and you'll all be my wives.
- That's it, freeze.
Good, good, okay, one more.
Jessie, just one more.
- That's enough. - Come on, one more.
Jessie.
- I said hi.
- Hello.
- Go get him, that's it.
- Wanna come in, meet the band
Autograph
Strange kid.
- Tomorrow night, you're supposed to play at Grand Guignol.
- You'll be there, little girl
- Don't come.
- Why not
- They don't want you.
- Who don't
- Just don't come.
My father.
- Jessie, it's time to judge the wet t-shirt contest.
- Yeah, Jessie, come on. - Winner gets
in your pants, man.
- Sounds pretty weird.
What is it
- Got it from a book.
- A who
- A book, you know. Book
- Shit.
- Said in the Middle Ages,
they used this music to raise the dead.
- Raise the dead
What for
- Probably to mop your floors,
or, uh, paint your house, fuck your wife.
- Shit.
How many times I gotta kill that sucker
- Well, if I'm not mistaken, it looks like
this music might be bringing it back to life.
- Then quit.
- Ron, Ron, Ron, Ron, Ron, Ron, Ron, Ron, Ron.
Oh, jeez Louise, pull over.
- Ah-hoo!
Mama.
Lord have mercy.
- You live around here
- Not far.
- Last night, some little girl told us,
"Stay out of here."
- Strange town, strange little girls.
- Strange big girls.
- Maybe.
- Why'd she want us to stay out
- Can't imagine.
- Is this town kinda weird or somethin'
- Nothing weird here.
Turn right.
- What for
- Home.
Might as well stay with us.
Beats the motel.
- Well, I don't know.
- Oh, come on, Ron.
- It's free, she's a fine mama.
- Okay.
- All right, you don't pay me back --
- Hey, can I give you a hand - Yeah, sure.
Thanks a lot.
Robby!
- Jesus! - What was that
- It's only a toy.
Mickey, Mickey, now what did I tell you
about keeping your toys in your room, huh
- I don't wanna be impolite, but what's that screaming
- It's just my mother's primal scream therapy.
Quiet, Momma!
Guests!
You see, we're very accommodating to our guests.
Won't you come in and make yourself at home
- Real damn peaceful out here in the country.
Make of our hands, one hand.
I have to say, it don't come easy
And if it does, it tends to fade
You gotta try and keep believing
What a feeling when results are made
Na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na
With every dawn there's a new tomorrow
It's not too late to feel this way
Even though it don't come easy
It's a chance to get a break
Well, take your shot
You may have no others
Well, there's a challenge every day
And don't be shy
Just give it a try
It'll make your day
Na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na
Well, take your shot
You may have no others
Well, there's a challenge every day
And don't be shy
Just give it a try
It'll make your day
Na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na
- Okay. - Come on, Ron, take it.
- Okay, everybody hold still.
- Hey, girl!
Wait a second!
- Oh, hi, Daddy. - What are you --
what are you up to
- Nothing.
- No
You best not be part of that nonsense out there.
- No, sir.
- Hi.
- Get home.
- How you doing
- Get the fuck out of town, you little pecker.
- Um, well, we can't do that, sir.
We got a real big concert tomorrow.
- You got shit tomorrow, sonny.
- Girl's father is a real mother.
- Hello.
- You boys own this here vehicle
- Yes, sir.
- All of ya
- Yes, sir.
- That's trouble.
Ain't it, Ed
- Right, Ted.
What do you think, Red
- Trouble, Ed.
- Right, Red.
- You don't seem to understand.
You can't do this to us.
You see, tomorrow, Don Matson is coming here.
We've got to do this concert.
- Good luck.
Buh-bye.
- Wait a minute, please.
You son of a bitch!
Damn it! - Come on, man.
- No. - Take it easy.
What's a night in jail
- Yeah, what if it's two nights
There's no concert!
Look, we've got two shows,
one at 6:00 and one at 9:00.
Matson could be at either one.
And if we're not there, I'll never get him back.
Would you cool it
- Hey, there'll be a show.
I can feel it.
Our stuff's gonna shake this town apart.
Somethin'll work out.
- Yeah, sure.
- Yeah, the only way you're gonna miss that concert
is if you're dead, okay
- Even dead, man, somethin' will work out.
Boom, boom, boom
Oh, let me love you one time
Let me love you twice
Let me love you three times
Fourth time's nice
Five times, six times in the --
Hey, oh, God, we're happening now.
- Hey, well...well, okay.
I don't how much you need for bail,
but here's everything I could find to help you.
- How much
- $37.06.
- All right, who from
Santa Claus
- Hey, girl! Thanks.
- I tried to warn you.
- Come here.
I'm so in love, but you're so young
When you touch my hand
Does that mean we're in love ?
That's better.
You're neat.
- No, I'm not.
- Yeah, you are.
- Uh-uh.
- Yeah, you are.
- Uh-uh.
- You come with me, right now.
- I'm just --
- You're just nothing.
Come on.
- Oh, scheie! Amazing.
You're 95 years old and you can still do it.
- It's the vitamins.
My mixture.
Want to make it again
- Was ist das
Mein Gott, the grandchildren.
Raus, raus!
- Can't we watch, please
- Watch old Grandpa and Grandmama
Shame, shame!
- What's wrong if they watch
- Oh, bad enough you let our children watch,
now the grandchildren, too!
- Oh, please, Grandpa
- Oh, Grandpa, please.
- So cute, who can say nein
All right, you can watch, but don't touch.
- Thanks.
- My pleasure.
- Yeah, why
- You arouse in me certain appetites.
- I can believe that.
Hey, Seor Commandant!
You coming to the show tomorrow night
The loud show
The loud music show
Rock and roll
- No show, boy.
And when I get through with you,
you're gonna wish you were somewhere else!
- See you at the show, Mr. Dillon.
- No show guaranteed.
- How are you stopping us
- There's ways.
- You guys, you go back to the farm.
I've got business at the concert.
- Hi.
Your old man around
You okay
Here, our friend bailed us out.
- She's not your friend.
- She got us out.
- She's...
- Yeah
What
You're weird, you know
- Come on, Jessie!
- Look, I gotta go.
But you take this, okay
Come on, take it.
Please.
Hey, girl.
You got a name
You wanna tell me what it is
Listen, I thought about you all day.
I wrote a song about you.
The least you can do is tell me your name.
Need it for the song.
Tell.
- Cassie.
- Bass.
- Ba-be-be-be-be.
- Good, good, good.
Now easy, Buckey.
Drums, drums, drums.
You're getting worse with age.
- Seen that guy with the ugly smeared all over his face
I swear, I've seen that guy in a movie one time.
He went around killing neighborhood dogs with his teeth.
And that guy with the ax,
his head spins all the way around, I know it.
- Creepy.
- Creepy.
We're gonna get murdered in our beds.
There's probably a lady around here with knives.
Some guy with a chainsaw.
- Mellow out. - Mellow out
Let's see how mellow you are
when we find you slashed to death in some shower.
- So the place is a little weird.
But not that girl.
God, I can't wait to get my hands all over her.
- And what about him - Spooks the shit out of me.
Looks like he munches babies.
Babies and rock and roll singers.
Wonder how long he's been dead.
- One, two, three.
I'm so in love, but you're so young
When you touch my hand, does that mean we're in love ?
Whoa
For you it's new, there's so much I've been through
But I can't hold back the feeling of wanting you
Whoa, Cassie
Won't you tell me what to do ?
I wanna spend my life in love with you
Whoa, Cassie
You're a dream
- Thank God, you're saved.
We really feel bad about this.
- Oh, we're really sorry.
Our electrical system is really old.
Christian, we must have it fixed before somebody gets hurt.
- This emergency meeting of the Grand Guignol town council
is called to order.
Bless us, oh Lord,
and show the council thy eternal civic wisdom.
- Amen. - Amen.
- Amen.
- P-p-point of order, Mr. Chair.
- Yes, Mr. Junior Councilman.
- A-according to the town charter,
emergency sessions are all --
- Point of information, Mr. Chair.
- Uh, yes, Mr. Senior Council.
- Now, is this an emergency meeting or an emergency session
- Well, uh...
- Because you referred to it as a meeting,
yet the good councilman to my left here
called a session, Which is it
- Excellent point, Mr. Senior Councilman.
Council will vote.
All those in favor of meeting signify.
- Aye.
- Uh, session signify.
- Aye.
- One to one, Mr. Senior Councilman.
Not voting.
- I have no opinion, Mr. Chair.
- Point of order, Mr. Chair.
- Yes, Mr. Junior Councilman.
- C-c-chair may vote only t-to break a tie,
all due respect.
Since Mr. Senior Councilman has n-no opinion --
- At this time, Mr. Junior Councilman,
no opinion at this point in time.
- T-then-then-then the vote is one to naught,
which in no way can be considered a tie.
Therefore, this is a meeting or a session.
Not-not how I voted.
- Meeting.
- S-s-s-so be it.
Now, to return to my p-p-point of order.
W-w-w-w-what, what was it
- What was what
- The-the-my point of order.
- How the hell do I know
- In-in that case, I'll-I'll withdraw it.
- Good.
We have before the council a proposal
for an addition to statute 6969.
To the effect that rock and roll music
should fall under existing town bans against gypsies --
- Yeah. - Right on.
- Circuses with lewd shows --
Door-to-door sales of in-in-inti-intimate devices
and stage plays that depict unnatural acts,
or call in to question American foreign policy.
The council throws open the floor for discussion.
Edna.
- Well, my Reader's Digest says
that these songs have hidden messages.
- Amen.
Blanche.
- My National Enquirer says
that musicians cannot play a single note
unless they eat drugs first.
- And Lu-Ann.
- Well, as y'all know, my momma's
been very ill and in the hospital,
but she left me a note.
Well, she says that rock and roll music
causes sex, adolescent sex, premarital sex
and worst of all, physical sex.
- Now this is a delicate topic, so brace up.
I can tell by the ginger way
the boys been practicing lately.
At night, they put on those little earphones
and behind closed bedroom doors,
unbeknownst to their good parents,
they turn up the volume, they close their eyes,
and visualize non-curricular fantasies,
proceed to self-abuse. - Self what
- Abuse. - Self
Self-abuse
- Yes.
- What's that
Yeah. - Yeah, yeah.
- I remember.
Yeah, I used to do that all the time.
Remember when we got that goat You know, the big goat.
And you'd push it from behind, I'd grab a hold --
- Order!
- I will not let this meeting get out of hand!
- He smashed his glasses.
- Can I please say something
- Council ready to vote
- Yep. - Yep.
- All those in favor signify.
- Aye. - Aye.
- Aye.
Unanimous, no rock and roll.
No concert tomorrow night.
Sheriff, see that that's in place.
- Point of order, Mr. Chair.
- Yes. - Now this, uh...
this proposal we're talking about here
bans more than just a concert.
It bans radio rock and roll.
It bans singing it in the street.
In fact, it bans everything.
- No, it doesn't. - Oh, absolutely.
Right here, no rock and roll at anytime, in any form,
under any circumstance whatsoever. Right there.
- What idiot wrote that
- Uh...y-y-you did, Mr. Chair.
- He did!
- I just advised you.
Don't look at me.
- You advised me wrong, bonehead.
- Too late, it passed.
- Sheriff, notify the radio station no rock and roll.
And round up all the records.
- Hear ye, hear ye.
I, the Sheriff and Sergeant-at-Arms
of the corporated township of Grand Guignol,
do hereby order and demand compliance with the law.
To wit, I want everybody here to go home, gather up,
and bring back every filthy rock and roll record
your kids or anybody else in your family
may have around the house, and I want you to do it now!
Now move!
- Either you're a whole new breed of spider,
or the damn song works.
- I think I love you.
- You are so romantic.
Must go to movies a lot.
- This is just like a movie, huh
- Yeah, Love Story.
- Hmm, maybe Devil in Miss Jones
- How about, Psycho
- Oh, shit.
- Step into my parlor.
This is the only room in the house that isn't cursed.
Oh, I seem to have dropped my thing.
- I'll get it for you.
- Bobby!
No!
No!
Get away!
Oh, no!
- You look like a bunch of assholes.
I'll take care of that bunch.
- Daddy! - Move, girl!
- Daddy! - Get out of here.
Warn them!
No!
- Jessie!
Where are you
- What's wrong, kid
- I don't want him to hurt you.
- Nobody's gonna hurt anybody.
What the
Come on, let's get out of here.
Come on, follow me.
- Jessie!
- Watch your step.
Just hold on.
You go that way.
- No, I don't wanna go without you.
- He's after me.
If he gets me, play this.
- What - Just do it.
Run!
Cat, you're crazy.
- Good meat is such pleasure.
- Oh, yes, ma'am.
- Too bad the others aren't here to enjoy it.
But a nice funeral, didn't you think so
I like multiple funerals, they're so cozy, so homey.
Don't you agree
- They were my friends.
- Yes, well, all the more reason, then.
- The more people you put into the ground,
the better for those who are left.
- Sir.
- Don't you agree, Sheriff
- Yes, sir.
- Sheriff.
I am glad you are here today.
We appreciate how you and town council support us.
I won.
I made them outlaw polluted rock and roll music.
You know that
It was well done.
- We know which side our bread is buttered on.
- You heard the joke about the traveling salesman, ja
- Uh, no, sir.
- He came here.
- He came here.
- He came...
- Young man, now you are without work.
Without a band.
Maybe I have for you a job.
You would like that, ja
I'm needing an unpolluted, ambitious young boy
who can organize and get things done.
Other things.
- Um, what kind of position
- Oh, boy! Oh, boy! Oh, boy!
- Calm, Poppy. Calm.
- Calm!
Forty years I am waiting and you are telling me calm!
Long enough I have been hiding a mask.
- Oh, my god.
- Oh, so now, now you know.
- Can it really be you
- You think I shot myself down
in some -- some bunker someplace
You think that I am stupid
- We have satellite hookup.
Ready, mein Fuhrer.
Guten tag. Achtung!
- No more mask.
No more hiding.
No more Mr. Nice Guy.
No more waiting.
Today is the day to attack.
The Third Reich is dead, the Fourth Reich lives.
Juden! Kill! Machen tot!
Intellectuals, tot!
Alles tot!
We make pure, we make right,
we make strong, tomorrow, today.
Today California, tomorrow the world.
Sieg heil!
- Jessie...
I'm going to tell you something
I've never told anyone else before.
When my momma died,
my daddy never cried for her.
I can't figure it out,
'cause I'm crying for you.
And I'll never stop crying for you.
I swear it on your ring.
When we sing with the master race
We go heil, heil
It is the purest race
Da-da-da-da-da-da
Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba
- Well, how do you like it
- What is it - What is it
Mein Gott, my boy, this is the height of civilization.
This is the cleansing place.
Come here.
You see this, you see this
This is gas, gas.
This is yellow gas.
Yellow gas, it splits the head,
it makes the ears bleed, und collapses the stomach.
Yes, come. This, this...this is blue gas.
Blue gas that fills the lungs with pus and urine,
piss and pus, piss and pus, piss and pus,
piss and pus, piss and pus.
Sieg heil, sieg heil, sieg heil!
Now admit that you are excited.
Now will you accept my job offer
- You're crazy.
No, let me go!
No!
No, let me go!
- Damn American youth.
It's all the same, no ambition.
Polluted blood.
You will be the first we will eliminate!
Shame, he as a nice boy.
- Oh, God, no.
- I shall be back.
- Jessie.
Jessie.
Oh, my God.
- Ah, it's him again.
- The farm!
Hitler!
Nazis! - Boy, you better shut up
if you know what's good for you.
- I-I better, I-I better check this out myself.
- What, what is it
- The band, walking dead.
The whole family's killed.
- But they were ghouls.
- Ghouls, ghouls
- What are ghouls - What the hell
are you talking about
- Ah, now everything revealing from many years.
Adolf Hitler, Eva Braun...
They making deal with Truman to become --
to saving their miserable lives.
They sneak in here and making them new identity
as retired Bible salesman from Brooklyn.
Then wraith of God dropping bomb on their stinking heads.
Terrible it went, making them ghouls.
- Ghouls
- Living ghouls.
Ghouls begetting ghouls.
Evil begetting evil.
Epidemic!
One bite from ghoul's mouth, venom making you to be dying.
- What
- Well, venom.
Open your ears, bonehead.
Venom, like from snake.
You...you are...are all doomed.
I am luckiest one among you, I am dying.
- But...but how do they become ghouls
- How is very simple, they just --
They just --
Hallelujah
Hallelujah, hallelujah
- How do you know all this
- How - Yeah, how
- Because I was the one who --
- Who
- I was the one who -- - Who
Hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah
- W-what...w-what...c-c-can we do to save ourselves
God Omnipotent reigneth
Hallelujah
- No, please!
Hallelujah
- Oh, that's perfect.
Come on, let's go check out the house.
- Will they hurt Jessie
- Jessie's a big boy.
He can take care of himself.
Besides, he's dead.
Hey, I got to split
I've got to go
When I hear those voices, they're calling, they're --
- Now, nobody touch nothing 'til I get back.
We got to get fingerprints.
- Crummy little town.
Hey, boys!
Hey, Matson's here!
Not much of a crowd, eh
Well, that's showbiz, huh
Feast or famine.
For me, it's always feast.
Hey, love your hat, buddy.
Yeah.
Ooh, you devil.
Hey, hiya gorgeous, it's me.
Me.
Yeah, how's everything
Yeah, who's that I hear breathing
Yeah, I'll bet.
Yeah, well, just remember
what I taught the doberman to bite.
Yeah, I'm out here in the toolies
watching some hick group.
Yeah, well, you never know.
Are you kidding me
This town's dead.
Did Paramount call
Ooh, good, good, good, good, good, good, yeah.
How about London
Yeah, well, tell him to shit or get off the pot, will you
Hey, these guys look good.
Ah, yeah, well. Night, angel.
Keep your legs crossed.
Hey, great makeup you guys.
Yeah.
Hey, we'll get somebody to make it more convincing, huh
Beautiful.
Right.
I'm so in love, but you're so young
When you touch my hand, does that mean we're in love
Whoa
For you it's new, there's so much I've been through
But I can't hold back the feeling of wanting you
Whoa, Cassie
Won't you tell me what to do ?
I wanna spend my life in love with you
Whoa, Cassie
You're a dream I can't let go
I knew that when I found the one, I'd know
This time I feel, this time it's from my heart
And I pledge you my devotion from the start
Whoa
I only hope that you will say I do
And stay with me 'til death do us apart
Whoa, Cassie
Won't you tell me what to do
I wanna spend my life in love with you
Whoa, Cassie
You're a dream I can't let go
I knew that when I found the one, I'd know
And I've spent so many nights
Alone and out of view
But it's been worth the wait to fall in love with you
Whoa, Cassie
Won't you tell me what to do ?
I wanna spend my life in love with you
Whoa, Cassie
You're a dream I can't let go
I knew that when I found the one, I'd know
Whoa
Cassie
- Was this the first time for you
- Yeah.
- Arnold, are you lying to me
- No. Well, it's just like the first time --
- Arnold, don't -- - I swear.
- - lie to me.
- It was just like the first time.
- Listen, listen, I made a commitment here.
And I gotta tell you, Arnold,
I gotta tell you, I see you with another woman,
I don't know what I'm gonna do.
I may lose it. - No, you'll -- you'll never
see me with another woman, never.
- You promise me - Never.
Kiss me.
Kiss me again.
What
What
- It was a little thing in the bushes!
- Oh, you scared me!
- It was so gross.
Oh, my God, I think my mother has spies.
- Your mother - Yes.
You better go check it out.
Here, take this. He may be armed.
Oh, I don't believe this.
I do not believe this.
Oh, my God!
Arnold!
Oh, my God, are you okay
Oh, you poor...
You little son of a bitch!
What did you do to Arnold
No, no!
Oh, my God!
Oh, Arnold!
- This is how Papa teaching me,
taking care of walking dead, this is.
- How does it work
- It's driving stake through heart.
- That's for vampires.
- Vampires
- You know, there must be some way to stop these zombies.
- Sometimes they die, others are preserved.
It depends on the music.
- Oh, who cares about that
- Let me see, they feed on living flesh.
- We noticed that.
- Yeah, they rip off your skin
while the blood is still flowing in your veins.
- We noticed that, too -- - We know.
- I got it, here it is.
Certain ghouls don't eat heads.
- So
- Well, the ghouls hate heads
the way Satan hates the church.
See, ghouls are the antithesis of intellectual existence,
which centers within the heads.
In the ghoul, the brain dissolves
to become their venom.
- So, what can we do
- Yeah, what do we do
- We use our heads.
It'll make your day
- Yeah, Zelda, listen.
Look, will you quit talking with your mouth full
and listen to me
This is the most incredible act I've ever seen.
Yeah, I want you to cancel Tokyo.
Ah, cancel Paramount, too.
Cancel London, cancel everything.
Cancel my shrink, I ain't gonna need her this week.
Yeah, bye.
You may have no
Others We're in the money
We're in the money
There's a challenge every --
- Out of my way, guys.
Come on, clear it, clear it.
Holy shit!
- Let me in!
Is anybody in here
Let me in!
Let me in!
No!
Let me in!
I'm alive, I'm alive!
Please, I'm alive!
I'm alive!
- If he can talk, he's gotta be one of us!
Yes, it says here that she's right.
- Let him in!
- Okay, come on, help me, will ya
Get down there, hold that.
Hold on.
- Okay, good.
Hurry up, will ya
Oh, Mommy, what did you buy
- Honey, don't complain.
Your father told me if sirloin was more than $6 a pound
to buy something cheaper.
- Well, how much was this
- What - This!
- What are -- what are you doing
- Oh, my god!
- We've gotta call the police.
- No, no, you're not taking that inside.
Mr. Bud is home.
- I have to use your phone. - No, no.
- Why not
- I just waxed the floor.
- So - So
It's dripping.
- Oh.
Oh, I'm so sorry.
Oh, well, then he can just wait out here.
- Yeah. - Okay
- Yeah.
- I'll be right back.
- I can't believe -- - I'm so sorry.
- Anything. - I know, I really understand.
- Come on, let's have some coffee.
- Okay, great.
- Well, now look at this.
Ooh, what do you think - Looks great.
- So long, Arnold.
- Are we about ready
- Just about. - Okay.
- If the test batch works,
we'll make enough for the rest of us.
- Okay.
- This is crazy nuts.
What are we doing
- Ghouls don't like heads.
If we wear these, they don't attack us.
- So
- So our brave young men can get close enough to kill 'em.
- How killing ghouls
Ghouls are already dead.
- It's our only hope.
- A waste of good wool.
- Well, we don't actually kill them,
we just walk past them.
You see, ghouls don't like heads,
so they'll let us escape.
- Oh, bullshit, young stupid.
She said I want love, but I can't unwind
I'm in a hurry but I'm out of time
Won't you listen, please, tell me what to do
- Yeah.
Listen, Bernie, you get me four Class A contracts
right away, you see.
Listen, I don't care if you're in jail.
You're always in jail.
Listen, you're my lawyer, you see,
you do this right away
or I'm gonna bust you out of jail,
where the syndicate gonna get at ya.
Shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake
- Good, good, looks good.
Very good, very good.
Nice.
Quick.
- Why aren't you going with us
- I prefer that you coordinate the pilot project.
I'll remain here in supervisory capacity.
- Okay.
Keep your heads up.
It's working.
Get away!
They know about us!
It doesn't work!
Run, they know about us!
No!
- It worked, they're here!
You're safe! Thank God, you're safe!
I-I saved you!
The power of the mind!
This is fantastic.
I just can't believe it! It worked, it...worked...
Don't believe everything you read!
Street angel
She's got the mark of the devil
Street angel
Well, she'll be sending you straight to hell
She casts a spell so you can't break free
She's not in love and destroys by any means
Oh, she does
Well, it's a jungle, kill, love, and kill
She's a masquerade murderer for thrill
Hey
Street angel
She's got the mark of the devil
Street angel
Well, she'll be sending you straight to hell
- Whoo, you are guys are great!
We're going places!
Whoo!
Well, it's a drug to kill, love, and kill
She's a masquerade murderer for thrill
Hey!
Street angel
She's got the mark of the devil
Street angel
Well, she's sending you straight to hell
No, leave me alone!
Street angel
She's got the mark of the devil
Street angel
Well, she'll be sending you straight to hell
Street angel
She's got the mark of the devil
Street angel
She'll be sending you straight to hell
- Sloppy exit, but we'll work on it, all right
Great.
- Well, then, what are we gonna do
- Yeah.
- Wirgin.
Young, alive wirgin.
- Young, alive what
- Wirgin.
Wirgin.
- What's that
- You don't know what wirgin
- Virgin
- Yeah, wirgin.
- Oh.
- Wirgin.
Yes. - Yeah.
- Take young, alive wirgin, tying to tree on top of hill.
Enter the moon at midnight, then ghouls take her.
- Devour her
- First, they oomph her.
You understanding what I'm meaning
Then they devour her, hmm.
Then they go back to their rest for hundred years,
so then, it's somebody else's problem.
- No, that's an old wives' tale.
- No, it happened once in Los Angeles.
The ghouls returned to their graves
after ravishing a virgin in the moonlight at midnight.
It's the only way they have sex.
- Where'd they find a virgin in Los Angeles
- It was 1890.
So they stay in their graves until 1990.
Unless an earthquake makes it happen sooner.
- God, this sounds like a cheap movie.
- This whole day's been like a cheap movie.
- Only problem is, how we find young, alive wirgin
- Don't look at me.
- Then who?
- Hey, you!
What are you doing with Arnold
Hey, I better never see the two of you together again.
How could you let a floozy like that turn your head
Oh, baby, after all the...
Hey, no, he's mine!
You can't have him!
You can't have him!
No!
Arnold, no!
Get away from me!
You get away, you get away!
No!
- Ron!
Help, let me in!
She's after me.
Help me.
Help me, Ron.
- No. No, no, no.
Don't you worry, I'm gonna get help.
The ring, give me the ring.
Give it to me.
Cassie, don't you worry, I'll take care of everything!
- Come on, you guys, will you listen to reason
Now, come on, half a million just to sign, damn it!
Will you say somethin'
What's wrong with you guys
Listen to me, I got the greatest contract in the world.
You're gonna be stars if you sign with Don, baby.
What's the matter with you guys
Listen to me!
Half a million dollars!
Are you crazy
You don't know what you're giving away here, buddy.
Don't you drive off!
You drive off, you're through in this town,
you understand me
You can't do this to me!
All right, you turkeys, that's it!
You're cutting your own throat!
You're through in this business!
You're dead!
Your career's buried!
It's over!
I've been in this business too many years
to be ripped to pieces by punks!
Watch the suit, turkey.
No!
No!
- Mr. Matson.
Oh, Mr. Matson. Uh, listen...
things have been a bit delayed.
But, uh...
Oh, what's the use
I can't con you.
Sir, the whole band is dead, sir.
But maybe we could still come up
with some kind of deal, you know
I mean, they, uh...forget it.
All my life, I wanted to be like you, sir.
Ever since I was a kid, you were my idol.
I learned to hustle from you.
I learned to deal by reading about you.
Everything I learned in the business,
I learned about from you.
But you know what I learned tonight
I learned that none of it means a damn.
Oh, no offense, sir.
I mean, don't bite my head off,
but the money, the deals, the glitter, it's nothing.
It's trivial.
The real thing, the only thing, is to survive.
You know what I'm doing right now
I'm using everything I learned from you
just to help one little girl.
Not to make a record, or a million bucks,
but just so one little girl could end this day
as alive as she started.
And that's all.
I finally understand that life's the only thing of value.
Nothing else.
You ever feel that way, sir
You suck, mister!
I know it and everybody knows it!
- Leave me alone!
Please, stop!
Let me go, let me go!
Please, let me go!
Help me!
Please!
Let me go!
- You guys, I need you.
I need you.
Jessie, listen to me.
Listen to me, you dead son of bitch!
They got Cassie.
You guys have got to help me.
- Help!
Please!
- Chuck, you owe me.
How many times was I the last resort and I was there
You guys, make Jessie listen to me.
I can't just pull it all together this time.
I can't do it alone
while you guys just fart around and lay down and die.
- Please, no!
What are doing
Don't leave me alone!
- Jessie, I've got the ring you gave to Cassie.
They've got her, Jess.
They're gonna tie her up,
and then let all the ghouls screw her to death.
Is that what you want
Ghouls you created screwing her to death
Yes.
Come on.
Yes!
Come on.
Good, one more show!
Come on!
- Get away!
Leave me alone!
Please, let me go!
Leave me alone!
Help me!
Get away from me!
- It's me.
Come with me.
- I want Jessie.
- Come on, let's get out of here.
- Go ahead, I'll be right there.
I meant everything I said, Jessie.
You'll always be the only one.
I'll come back and visit you here forever.
I love you.
Can you hear me
Jessie
I love you, Jessie, forever and ever.
It will never die.
When you touch my hand, does that mean we're in love ?
Whoa
For you it's new, there's so much I've been through
But I can't hold back the feeling of wanting you
Whoa, Cassie
Won't you tell me what to do ?
I wanna spend my life in love with you
Whoa, Cassie
You're a dream I can't let go
I knew that when I found the one, I'd know
This time I feel, this time it's from my heart
And I pledge you my devotion from the start
Whoa
I only hope that you will say I do
And stay with me 'til death do us apart
Whoa, Cassie
Won't you tell me what to do ?
I wanna spend my life in love with you
Whoa, Cassie
You're a dream I can't let go
I knew that when I found the one, I'd know
And I've spent so many nights
Alone and out of view
But it's been worth the wait to fall in love with you
- Well, come on!
Put your hands together!
I met a girl just the other night
She looked me over, told me she was uptight
I didn't know exactly what to do
But I thought I'd better make my move
I said my car's parked right outside
Let's try it out and baby go for a ride
Well, she said no, no, not quite yet
Listen to me, 'cause I'm so upset
I want love, but I can't unwind
I'm in a hurry, but I'm out of time
Well, won't you listen
Please, tell me what to do
I said, shake, shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake it out, babe, tonight
Yeah, shake, shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake it out baby, tonight
Whoa
She pulled me back and sat me in my chair
Said she doesn't like a quick affair
I said, babe, you know you got me all wrong
I just wanted you to go along
I wanna get you out of your mood
Life's too short for you to sit and stew
And in no world I could break your heart
'Cause you've been playing it much too smart
She said, I'm going crazy and don't know why
My head is spinning and I'm ready to cry
Won't you listen, please, tell me what to do
I said shake, shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake it out
- You know, this ain't music.
Shake, shake, shake it
Cow dying in shit.
- Who
- What
- Cow dying in shit.
Shake, shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake it out, baby, tonight
Come on
And she said I want love but I can't unwind
I'm in a hurry, but I'm out of time
Won't you listen, please, tell me what to do
Shake, shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake it out, babe, tonight
- Do we really want the children of Grand Guignol
listening to this kind of garbage
- No.
- No.
- No.
Shake, shake, shake it out, babe, tonight
You gotta shake, shake, shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake, shake it out, babe, tonight
All right!
Now! Yeah!
- Jessie, I need photos.
You know, girls screaming, climbing all over you.
Don Matson is Columbia Records, man.
He wants to see those kids insane.
- Listen, man, we are musicians,
you know, not day camp counselors.
- Now lookit, I busted my ass a year for this.
In three months, you'll be national.
No more shit towns and shit vans.
Come on, man, I need those photos
and I need 'em tonight,
so you get your butts out there.
- Forget it.
- Suit yourself.
Okay, girls, come on in.
Let's go.
Oh, don't fall down.
That's it.
- Baby!
- Beautiful.
Beautiful. - Where
- Oh, yeah, right there.
Put the "O" in the middle.
- Oh, my goodness. - Oh, beautiful, beautiful.
- Oh! - What am I supposed to do
- Jessie. - Jessie, sign those luscious,
nubile, tender, underaged tits, man.
- Right.
- Don't dot the "i" too hard.
- One time for you. - Is two inches
far enough away
- What's your name - Tommy, draw a picture.
- Picture, Ron There's enough room here
for the Gettysburg Address.
I might just -- - Yeah, well.
- Hey, you know, girls, soon, I'm gonna be a Mormon
and you'll all be my wives.
- That's it, freeze.
Good, good, okay, one more.
Jessie, just one more.
- That's enough. - Come on, one more.
Jessie.
- I said hi.
- Hello.
- Go get him, that's it.
- Wanna come in, meet the band
Autograph
Strange kid.
- Tomorrow night, you're supposed to play at Grand Guignol.
- You'll be there, little girl
- Don't come.
- Why not
- They don't want you.
- Who don't
- Just don't come.
My father.
- Jessie, it's time to judge the wet t-shirt contest.
- Yeah, Jessie, come on. - Winner gets
in your pants, man.
- Sounds pretty weird.
What is it
- Got it from a book.
- A who
- A book, you know. Book
- Shit.
- Said in the Middle Ages,
they used this music to raise the dead.
- Raise the dead
What for
- Probably to mop your floors,
or, uh, paint your house, fuck your wife.
- Shit.
How many times I gotta kill that sucker
- Well, if I'm not mistaken, it looks like
this music might be bringing it back to life.
- Then quit.
- Ron, Ron, Ron, Ron, Ron, Ron, Ron, Ron, Ron.
Oh, jeez Louise, pull over.
- Ah-hoo!
Mama.
Lord have mercy.
- You live around here
- Not far.
- Last night, some little girl told us,
"Stay out of here."
- Strange town, strange little girls.
- Strange big girls.
- Maybe.
- Why'd she want us to stay out
- Can't imagine.
- Is this town kinda weird or somethin'
- Nothing weird here.
Turn right.
- What for
- Home.
Might as well stay with us.
Beats the motel.
- Well, I don't know.
- Oh, come on, Ron.
- It's free, she's a fine mama.
- Okay.
- All right, you don't pay me back --
- Hey, can I give you a hand - Yeah, sure.
Thanks a lot.
Robby!
- Jesus! - What was that
- It's only a toy.
Mickey, Mickey, now what did I tell you
about keeping your toys in your room, huh
- I don't wanna be impolite, but what's that screaming
- It's just my mother's primal scream therapy.
Quiet, Momma!
Guests!
You see, we're very accommodating to our guests.
Won't you come in and make yourself at home
- Real damn peaceful out here in the country.
Make of our hands, one hand.
I have to say, it don't come easy
And if it does, it tends to fade
You gotta try and keep believing
What a feeling when results are made
Na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na
With every dawn there's a new tomorrow
It's not too late to feel this way
Even though it don't come easy
It's a chance to get a break
Well, take your shot
You may have no others
Well, there's a challenge every day
And don't be shy
Just give it a try
It'll make your day
Na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na
Well, take your shot
You may have no others
Well, there's a challenge every day
And don't be shy
Just give it a try
It'll make your day
Na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na
Na, na, na, na
- Okay. - Come on, Ron, take it.
- Okay, everybody hold still.
- Hey, girl!
Wait a second!
- Oh, hi, Daddy. - What are you --
what are you up to
- Nothing.
- No
You best not be part of that nonsense out there.
- No, sir.
- Hi.
- Get home.
- How you doing
- Get the fuck out of town, you little pecker.
- Um, well, we can't do that, sir.
We got a real big concert tomorrow.
- You got shit tomorrow, sonny.
- Girl's father is a real mother.
- Hello.
- You boys own this here vehicle
- Yes, sir.
- All of ya
- Yes, sir.
- That's trouble.
Ain't it, Ed
- Right, Ted.
What do you think, Red
- Trouble, Ed.
- Right, Red.
- You don't seem to understand.
You can't do this to us.
You see, tomorrow, Don Matson is coming here.
We've got to do this concert.
- Good luck.
Buh-bye.
- Wait a minute, please.
You son of a bitch!
Damn it! - Come on, man.
- No. - Take it easy.
What's a night in jail
- Yeah, what if it's two nights
There's no concert!
Look, we've got two shows,
one at 6:00 and one at 9:00.
Matson could be at either one.
And if we're not there, I'll never get him back.
Would you cool it
- Hey, there'll be a show.
I can feel it.
Our stuff's gonna shake this town apart.
Somethin'll work out.
- Yeah, sure.
- Yeah, the only way you're gonna miss that concert
is if you're dead, okay
- Even dead, man, somethin' will work out.
Boom, boom, boom
Oh, let me love you one time
Let me love you twice
Let me love you three times
Fourth time's nice
Five times, six times in the --
Hey, oh, God, we're happening now.
- Hey, well...well, okay.
I don't how much you need for bail,
but here's everything I could find to help you.
- How much
- $37.06.
- All right, who from
Santa Claus
- Hey, girl! Thanks.
- I tried to warn you.
- Come here.
I'm so in love, but you're so young
When you touch my hand
Does that mean we're in love ?
That's better.
You're neat.
- No, I'm not.
- Yeah, you are.
- Uh-uh.
- Yeah, you are.
- Uh-uh.
- You come with me, right now.
- I'm just --
- You're just nothing.
Come on.
- Oh, scheie! Amazing.
You're 95 years old and you can still do it.
- It's the vitamins.
My mixture.
Want to make it again
- Was ist das
Mein Gott, the grandchildren.
Raus, raus!
- Can't we watch, please
- Watch old Grandpa and Grandmama
Shame, shame!
- What's wrong if they watch
- Oh, bad enough you let our children watch,
now the grandchildren, too!
- Oh, please, Grandpa
- Oh, Grandpa, please.
- So cute, who can say nein
All right, you can watch, but don't touch.
- Thanks.
- My pleasure.
- Yeah, why
- You arouse in me certain appetites.
- I can believe that.
Hey, Seor Commandant!
You coming to the show tomorrow night
The loud show
The loud music show
Rock and roll
- No show, boy.
And when I get through with you,
you're gonna wish you were somewhere else!
- See you at the show, Mr. Dillon.
- No show guaranteed.
- How are you stopping us
- There's ways.
- You guys, you go back to the farm.
I've got business at the concert.
- Hi.
Your old man around
You okay
Here, our friend bailed us out.
- She's not your friend.
- She got us out.
- She's...
- Yeah
What
You're weird, you know
- Come on, Jessie!
- Look, I gotta go.
But you take this, okay
Come on, take it.
Please.
Hey, girl.
You got a name
You wanna tell me what it is
Listen, I thought about you all day.
I wrote a song about you.
The least you can do is tell me your name.
Need it for the song.
Tell.
- Cassie.
- Bass.
- Ba-be-be-be-be.
- Good, good, good.
Now easy, Buckey.
Drums, drums, drums.
You're getting worse with age.
- Seen that guy with the ugly smeared all over his face
I swear, I've seen that guy in a movie one time.
He went around killing neighborhood dogs with his teeth.
And that guy with the ax,
his head spins all the way around, I know it.
- Creepy.
- Creepy.
We're gonna get murdered in our beds.
There's probably a lady around here with knives.
Some guy with a chainsaw.
- Mellow out. - Mellow out
Let's see how mellow you are
when we find you slashed to death in some shower.
- So the place is a little weird.
But not that girl.
God, I can't wait to get my hands all over her.
- And what about him - Spooks the shit out of me.
Looks like he munches babies.
Babies and rock and roll singers.
Wonder how long he's been dead.
- One, two, three.
I'm so in love, but you're so young
When you touch my hand, does that mean we're in love ?
Whoa
For you it's new, there's so much I've been through
But I can't hold back the feeling of wanting you
Whoa, Cassie
Won't you tell me what to do ?
I wanna spend my life in love with you
Whoa, Cassie
You're a dream
- Thank God, you're saved.
We really feel bad about this.
- Oh, we're really sorry.
Our electrical system is really old.
Christian, we must have it fixed before somebody gets hurt.
- This emergency meeting of the Grand Guignol town council
is called to order.
Bless us, oh Lord,
and show the council thy eternal civic wisdom.
- Amen. - Amen.
- Amen.
- P-p-point of order, Mr. Chair.
- Yes, Mr. Junior Councilman.
- A-according to the town charter,
emergency sessions are all --
- Point of information, Mr. Chair.
- Uh, yes, Mr. Senior Council.
- Now, is this an emergency meeting or an emergency session
- Well, uh...
- Because you referred to it as a meeting,
yet the good councilman to my left here
called a session, Which is it
- Excellent point, Mr. Senior Councilman.
Council will vote.
All those in favor of meeting signify.
- Aye.
- Uh, session signify.
- Aye.
- One to one, Mr. Senior Councilman.
Not voting.
- I have no opinion, Mr. Chair.
- Point of order, Mr. Chair.
- Yes, Mr. Junior Councilman.
- C-c-chair may vote only t-to break a tie,
all due respect.
Since Mr. Senior Councilman has n-no opinion --
- At this time, Mr. Junior Councilman,
no opinion at this point in time.
- T-then-then-then the vote is one to naught,
which in no way can be considered a tie.
Therefore, this is a meeting or a session.
Not-not how I voted.
- Meeting.
- S-s-s-so be it.
Now, to return to my p-p-point of order.
W-w-w-w-what, what was it
- What was what
- The-the-my point of order.
- How the hell do I know
- In-in that case, I'll-I'll withdraw it.
- Good.
We have before the council a proposal
for an addition to statute 6969.
To the effect that rock and roll music
should fall under existing town bans against gypsies --
- Yeah. - Right on.
- Circuses with lewd shows --
Door-to-door sales of in-in-inti-intimate devices
and stage plays that depict unnatural acts,
or call in to question American foreign policy.
The council throws open the floor for discussion.
Edna.
- Well, my Reader's Digest says
that these songs have hidden messages.
- Amen.
Blanche.
- My National Enquirer says
that musicians cannot play a single note
unless they eat drugs first.
- And Lu-Ann.
- Well, as y'all know, my momma's
been very ill and in the hospital,
but she left me a note.
Well, she says that rock and roll music
causes sex, adolescent sex, premarital sex
and worst of all, physical sex.
- Now this is a delicate topic, so brace up.
I can tell by the ginger way
the boys been practicing lately.
At night, they put on those little earphones
and behind closed bedroom doors,
unbeknownst to their good parents,
they turn up the volume, they close their eyes,
and visualize non-curricular fantasies,
proceed to self-abuse. - Self what
- Abuse. - Self
Self-abuse
- Yes.
- What's that
Yeah. - Yeah, yeah.
- I remember.
Yeah, I used to do that all the time.
Remember when we got that goat You know, the big goat.
And you'd push it from behind, I'd grab a hold --
- Order!
- I will not let this meeting get out of hand!
- He smashed his glasses.
- Can I please say something
- Council ready to vote
- Yep. - Yep.
- All those in favor signify.
- Aye. - Aye.
- Aye.
Unanimous, no rock and roll.
No concert tomorrow night.
Sheriff, see that that's in place.
- Point of order, Mr. Chair.
- Yes. - Now this, uh...
this proposal we're talking about here
bans more than just a concert.
It bans radio rock and roll.
It bans singing it in the street.
In fact, it bans everything.
- No, it doesn't. - Oh, absolutely.
Right here, no rock and roll at anytime, in any form,
under any circumstance whatsoever. Right there.
- What idiot wrote that
- Uh...y-y-you did, Mr. Chair.
- He did!
- I just advised you.
Don't look at me.
- You advised me wrong, bonehead.
- Too late, it passed.
- Sheriff, notify the radio station no rock and roll.
And round up all the records.
- Hear ye, hear ye.
I, the Sheriff and Sergeant-at-Arms
of the corporated township of Grand Guignol,
do hereby order and demand compliance with the law.
To wit, I want everybody here to go home, gather up,
and bring back every filthy rock and roll record
your kids or anybody else in your family
may have around the house, and I want you to do it now!
Now move!
- Either you're a whole new breed of spider,
or the damn song works.
- I think I love you.
- You are so romantic.
Must go to movies a lot.
- This is just like a movie, huh
- Yeah, Love Story.
- Hmm, maybe Devil in Miss Jones
- How about, Psycho
- Oh, shit.
- Step into my parlor.
This is the only room in the house that isn't cursed.
Oh, I seem to have dropped my thing.
- I'll get it for you.
- Bobby!
No!
No!
Get away!
Oh, no!
- You look like a bunch of assholes.
I'll take care of that bunch.
- Daddy! - Move, girl!
- Daddy! - Get out of here.
Warn them!
No!
- Jessie!
Where are you
- What's wrong, kid
- I don't want him to hurt you.
- Nobody's gonna hurt anybody.
What the
Come on, let's get out of here.
Come on, follow me.
- Jessie!
- Watch your step.
Just hold on.
You go that way.
- No, I don't wanna go without you.
- He's after me.
If he gets me, play this.
- What - Just do it.
Run!
Cat, you're crazy.
- Good meat is such pleasure.
- Oh, yes, ma'am.
- Too bad the others aren't here to enjoy it.
But a nice funeral, didn't you think so
I like multiple funerals, they're so cozy, so homey.
Don't you agree
- They were my friends.
- Yes, well, all the more reason, then.
- The more people you put into the ground,
the better for those who are left.
- Sir.
- Don't you agree, Sheriff
- Yes, sir.
- Sheriff.
I am glad you are here today.
We appreciate how you and town council support us.
I won.
I made them outlaw polluted rock and roll music.
You know that
It was well done.
- We know which side our bread is buttered on.
- You heard the joke about the traveling salesman, ja
- Uh, no, sir.
- He came here.
- He came here.
- He came...
- Young man, now you are without work.
Without a band.
Maybe I have for you a job.
You would like that, ja
I'm needing an unpolluted, ambitious young boy
who can organize and get things done.
Other things.
- Um, what kind of position
- Oh, boy! Oh, boy! Oh, boy!
- Calm, Poppy. Calm.
- Calm!
Forty years I am waiting and you are telling me calm!
Long enough I have been hiding a mask.
- Oh, my god.
- Oh, so now, now you know.
- Can it really be you
- You think I shot myself down
in some -- some bunker someplace
You think that I am stupid
- We have satellite hookup.
Ready, mein Fuhrer.
Guten tag. Achtung!
- No more mask.
No more hiding.
No more Mr. Nice Guy.
No more waiting.
Today is the day to attack.
The Third Reich is dead, the Fourth Reich lives.
Juden! Kill! Machen tot!
Intellectuals, tot!
Alles tot!
We make pure, we make right,
we make strong, tomorrow, today.
Today California, tomorrow the world.
Sieg heil!
- Jessie...
I'm going to tell you something
I've never told anyone else before.
When my momma died,
my daddy never cried for her.
I can't figure it out,
'cause I'm crying for you.
And I'll never stop crying for you.
I swear it on your ring.
When we sing with the master race
We go heil, heil
It is the purest race
Da-da-da-da-da-da
Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba-ba
- Well, how do you like it
- What is it - What is it
Mein Gott, my boy, this is the height of civilization.
This is the cleansing place.
Come here.
You see this, you see this
This is gas, gas.
This is yellow gas.
Yellow gas, it splits the head,
it makes the ears bleed, und collapses the stomach.
Yes, come. This, this...this is blue gas.
Blue gas that fills the lungs with pus and urine,
piss and pus, piss and pus, piss and pus,
piss and pus, piss and pus.
Sieg heil, sieg heil, sieg heil!
Now admit that you are excited.
Now will you accept my job offer
- You're crazy.
No, let me go!
No!
No, let me go!
- Damn American youth.
It's all the same, no ambition.
Polluted blood.
You will be the first we will eliminate!
Shame, he as a nice boy.
- Oh, God, no.
- I shall be back.
- Jessie.
Jessie.
Oh, my God.
- Ah, it's him again.
- The farm!
Hitler!
Nazis! - Boy, you better shut up
if you know what's good for you.
- I-I better, I-I better check this out myself.
- What, what is it
- The band, walking dead.
The whole family's killed.
- But they were ghouls.
- Ghouls, ghouls
- What are ghouls - What the hell
are you talking about
- Ah, now everything revealing from many years.
Adolf Hitler, Eva Braun...
They making deal with Truman to become --
to saving their miserable lives.
They sneak in here and making them new identity
as retired Bible salesman from Brooklyn.
Then wraith of God dropping bomb on their stinking heads.
Terrible it went, making them ghouls.
- Ghouls
- Living ghouls.
Ghouls begetting ghouls.
Evil begetting evil.
Epidemic!
One bite from ghoul's mouth, venom making you to be dying.
- What
- Well, venom.
Open your ears, bonehead.
Venom, like from snake.
You...you are...are all doomed.
I am luckiest one among you, I am dying.
- But...but how do they become ghouls
- How is very simple, they just --
They just --
Hallelujah
Hallelujah, hallelujah
- How do you know all this
- How - Yeah, how
- Because I was the one who --
- Who
- I was the one who -- - Who
Hallelujah, hallelujah, hallelujah
- W-what...w-what...c-c-can we do to save ourselves
God Omnipotent reigneth
Hallelujah
- No, please!
Hallelujah
- Oh, that's perfect.
Come on, let's go check out the house.
- Will they hurt Jessie
- Jessie's a big boy.
He can take care of himself.
Besides, he's dead.
Hey, I got to split
I've got to go
When I hear those voices, they're calling, they're --
- Now, nobody touch nothing 'til I get back.
We got to get fingerprints.
- Crummy little town.
Hey, boys!
Hey, Matson's here!
Not much of a crowd, eh
Well, that's showbiz, huh
Feast or famine.
For me, it's always feast.
Hey, love your hat, buddy.
Yeah.
Ooh, you devil.
Hey, hiya gorgeous, it's me.
Me.
Yeah, how's everything
Yeah, who's that I hear breathing
Yeah, I'll bet.
Yeah, well, just remember
what I taught the doberman to bite.
Yeah, I'm out here in the toolies
watching some hick group.
Yeah, well, you never know.
Are you kidding me
This town's dead.
Did Paramount call
Ooh, good, good, good, good, good, good, yeah.
How about London
Yeah, well, tell him to shit or get off the pot, will you
Hey, these guys look good.
Ah, yeah, well. Night, angel.
Keep your legs crossed.
Hey, great makeup you guys.
Yeah.
Hey, we'll get somebody to make it more convincing, huh
Beautiful.
Right.
I'm so in love, but you're so young
When you touch my hand, does that mean we're in love
Whoa
For you it's new, there's so much I've been through
But I can't hold back the feeling of wanting you
Whoa, Cassie
Won't you tell me what to do ?
I wanna spend my life in love with you
Whoa, Cassie
You're a dream I can't let go
I knew that when I found the one, I'd know
This time I feel, this time it's from my heart
And I pledge you my devotion from the start
Whoa
I only hope that you will say I do
And stay with me 'til death do us apart
Whoa, Cassie
Won't you tell me what to do
I wanna spend my life in love with you
Whoa, Cassie
You're a dream I can't let go
I knew that when I found the one, I'd know
And I've spent so many nights
Alone and out of view
But it's been worth the wait to fall in love with you
Whoa, Cassie
Won't you tell me what to do ?
I wanna spend my life in love with you
Whoa, Cassie
You're a dream I can't let go
I knew that when I found the one, I'd know
Whoa
Cassie
- Was this the first time for you
- Yeah.
- Arnold, are you lying to me
- No. Well, it's just like the first time --
- Arnold, don't -- - I swear.
- - lie to me.
- It was just like the first time.
- Listen, listen, I made a commitment here.
And I gotta tell you, Arnold,
I gotta tell you, I see you with another woman,
I don't know what I'm gonna do.
I may lose it. - No, you'll -- you'll never
see me with another woman, never.
- You promise me - Never.
Kiss me.
Kiss me again.
What
What
- It was a little thing in the bushes!
- Oh, you scared me!
- It was so gross.
Oh, my God, I think my mother has spies.
- Your mother - Yes.
You better go check it out.
Here, take this. He may be armed.
Oh, I don't believe this.
I do not believe this.
Oh, my God!
Arnold!
Oh, my God, are you okay
Oh, you poor...
You little son of a bitch!
What did you do to Arnold
No, no!
Oh, my God!
Oh, Arnold!
- This is how Papa teaching me,
taking care of walking dead, this is.
- How does it work
- It's driving stake through heart.
- That's for vampires.
- Vampires
- You know, there must be some way to stop these zombies.
- Sometimes they die, others are preserved.
It depends on the music.
- Oh, who cares about that
- Let me see, they feed on living flesh.
- We noticed that.
- Yeah, they rip off your skin
while the blood is still flowing in your veins.
- We noticed that, too -- - We know.
- I got it, here it is.
Certain ghouls don't eat heads.
- So
- Well, the ghouls hate heads
the way Satan hates the church.
See, ghouls are the antithesis of intellectual existence,
which centers within the heads.
In the ghoul, the brain dissolves
to become their venom.
- So, what can we do
- Yeah, what do we do
- We use our heads.
It'll make your day
- Yeah, Zelda, listen.
Look, will you quit talking with your mouth full
and listen to me
This is the most incredible act I've ever seen.
Yeah, I want you to cancel Tokyo.
Ah, cancel Paramount, too.
Cancel London, cancel everything.
Cancel my shrink, I ain't gonna need her this week.
Yeah, bye.
You may have no
Others We're in the money
We're in the money
There's a challenge every --
- Out of my way, guys.
Come on, clear it, clear it.
Holy shit!
- Let me in!
Is anybody in here
Let me in!
Let me in!
No!
Let me in!
I'm alive, I'm alive!
Please, I'm alive!
I'm alive!
- If he can talk, he's gotta be one of us!
Yes, it says here that she's right.
- Let him in!
- Okay, come on, help me, will ya
Get down there, hold that.
Hold on.
- Okay, good.
Hurry up, will ya
Oh, Mommy, what did you buy
- Honey, don't complain.
Your father told me if sirloin was more than $6 a pound
to buy something cheaper.
- Well, how much was this
- What - This!
- What are -- what are you doing
- Oh, my god!
- We've gotta call the police.
- No, no, you're not taking that inside.
Mr. Bud is home.
- I have to use your phone. - No, no.
- Why not
- I just waxed the floor.
- So - So
It's dripping.
- Oh.
Oh, I'm so sorry.
Oh, well, then he can just wait out here.
- Yeah. - Okay
- Yeah.
- I'll be right back.
- I can't believe -- - I'm so sorry.
- Anything. - I know, I really understand.
- Come on, let's have some coffee.
- Okay, great.
- Well, now look at this.
Ooh, what do you think - Looks great.
- So long, Arnold.
- Are we about ready
- Just about. - Okay.
- If the test batch works,
we'll make enough for the rest of us.
- Okay.
- This is crazy nuts.
What are we doing
- Ghouls don't like heads.
If we wear these, they don't attack us.
- So
- So our brave young men can get close enough to kill 'em.
- How killing ghouls
Ghouls are already dead.
- It's our only hope.
- A waste of good wool.
- Well, we don't actually kill them,
we just walk past them.
You see, ghouls don't like heads,
so they'll let us escape.
- Oh, bullshit, young stupid.
She said I want love, but I can't unwind
I'm in a hurry but I'm out of time
Won't you listen, please, tell me what to do
- Yeah.
Listen, Bernie, you get me four Class A contracts
right away, you see.
Listen, I don't care if you're in jail.
You're always in jail.
Listen, you're my lawyer, you see,
you do this right away
or I'm gonna bust you out of jail,
where the syndicate gonna get at ya.
Shake, shake it out, baby
Shake, shake, shake
- Good, good, looks good.
Very good, very good.
Nice.
Quick.
- Why aren't you going with us
- I prefer that you coordinate the pilot project.
I'll remain here in supervisory capacity.
- Okay.
Keep your heads up.
It's working.
Get away!
They know about us!
It doesn't work!
Run, they know about us!
No!
- It worked, they're here!
You're safe! Thank God, you're safe!
I-I saved you!
The power of the mind!
This is fantastic.
I just can't believe it! It worked, it...worked...
Don't believe everything you read!
Street angel
She's got the mark of the devil
Street angel
Well, she'll be sending you straight to hell
She casts a spell so you can't break free
She's not in love and destroys by any means
Oh, she does
Well, it's a jungle, kill, love, and kill
She's a masquerade murderer for thrill
Hey
Street angel
She's got the mark of the devil
Street angel
Well, she'll be sending you straight to hell
- Whoo, you are guys are great!
We're going places!
Whoo!
Well, it's a drug to kill, love, and kill
She's a masquerade murderer for thrill
Hey!
Street angel
She's got the mark of the devil
Street angel
Well, she's sending you straight to hell
No, leave me alone!
Street angel
She's got the mark of the devil
Street angel
Well, she'll be sending you straight to hell
Street angel
She's got the mark of the devil
Street angel
She'll be sending you straight to hell
- Sloppy exit, but we'll work on it, all right
Great.
- Well, then, what are we gonna do
- Yeah.
- Wirgin.
Young, alive wirgin.
- Young, alive what
- Wirgin.
Wirgin.
- What's that
- You don't know what wirgin
- Virgin
- Yeah, wirgin.
- Oh.
- Wirgin.
Yes. - Yeah.
- Take young, alive wirgin, tying to tree on top of hill.
Enter the moon at midnight, then ghouls take her.
- Devour her
- First, they oomph her.
You understanding what I'm meaning
Then they devour her, hmm.
Then they go back to their rest for hundred years,
so then, it's somebody else's problem.
- No, that's an old wives' tale.
- No, it happened once in Los Angeles.
The ghouls returned to their graves
after ravishing a virgin in the moonlight at midnight.
It's the only way they have sex.
- Where'd they find a virgin in Los Angeles
- It was 1890.
So they stay in their graves until 1990.
Unless an earthquake makes it happen sooner.
- God, this sounds like a cheap movie.
- This whole day's been like a cheap movie.
- Only problem is, how we find young, alive wirgin
- Don't look at me.
- Then who?
- Hey, you!
What are you doing with Arnold
Hey, I better never see the two of you together again.
How could you let a floozy like that turn your head
Oh, baby, after all the...
Hey, no, he's mine!
You can't have him!
You can't have him!
No!
Arnold, no!
Get away from me!
You get away, you get away!
No!
- Ron!
Help, let me in!
She's after me.
Help me.
Help me, Ron.
- No. No, no, no.
Don't you worry, I'm gonna get help.
The ring, give me the ring.
Give it to me.
Cassie, don't you worry, I'll take care of everything!
- Come on, you guys, will you listen to reason
Now, come on, half a million just to sign, damn it!
Will you say somethin'
What's wrong with you guys
Listen to me, I got the greatest contract in the world.
You're gonna be stars if you sign with Don, baby.
What's the matter with you guys
Listen to me!
Half a million dollars!
Are you crazy
You don't know what you're giving away here, buddy.
Don't you drive off!
You drive off, you're through in this town,
you understand me
You can't do this to me!
All right, you turkeys, that's it!
You're cutting your own throat!
You're through in this business!
You're dead!
Your career's buried!
It's over!
I've been in this business too many years
to be ripped to pieces by punks!
Watch the suit, turkey.
No!
No!
- Mr. Matson.
Oh, Mr. Matson. Uh, listen...
things have been a bit delayed.
But, uh...
Oh, what's the use
I can't con you.
Sir, the whole band is dead, sir.
But maybe we could still come up
with some kind of deal, you know
I mean, they, uh...forget it.
All my life, I wanted to be like you, sir.
Ever since I was a kid, you were my idol.
I learned to hustle from you.
I learned to deal by reading about you.
Everything I learned in the business,
I learned about from you.
But you know what I learned tonight
I learned that none of it means a damn.
Oh, no offense, sir.
I mean, don't bite my head off,
but the money, the deals, the glitter, it's nothing.
It's trivial.
The real thing, the only thing, is to survive.
You know what I'm doing right now
I'm using everything I learned from you
just to help one little girl.
Not to make a record, or a million bucks,
but just so one little girl could end this day
as alive as she started.
And that's all.
I finally understand that life's the only thing of value.
Nothing else.
You ever feel that way, sir
You suck, mister!
I know it and everybody knows it!
- Leave me alone!
Please, stop!
Let me go, let me go!
Please, let me go!
Help me!
Please!
Let me go!
- You guys, I need you.
I need you.
Jessie, listen to me.
Listen to me, you dead son of bitch!
They got Cassie.
You guys have got to help me.
- Help!
Please!
- Chuck, you owe me.
How many times was I the last resort and I was there
You guys, make Jessie listen to me.
I can't just pull it all together this time.
I can't do it alone
while you guys just fart around and lay down and die.
- Please, no!
What are doing
Don't leave me alone!
- Jessie, I've got the ring you gave to Cassie.
They've got her, Jess.
They're gonna tie her up,
and then let all the ghouls screw her to death.
Is that what you want
Ghouls you created screwing her to death
Yes.
Come on.
Yes!
Come on.
Good, one more show!
Come on!
- Get away!
Leave me alone!
Please, let me go!
Leave me alone!
Help me!
Get away from me!
- It's me.
Come with me.
- I want Jessie.
- Come on, let's get out of here.
- Go ahead, I'll be right there.
I meant everything I said, Jessie.
You'll always be the only one.
I'll come back and visit you here forever.
I love you.
Can you hear me
Jessie
I love you, Jessie, forever and ever.
It will never die.
When you touch my hand, does that mean we're in love ?
Whoa
For you it's new, there's so much I've been through
But I can't hold back the feeling of wanting you
Whoa, Cassie
Won't you tell me what to do ?
I wanna spend my life in love with you
Whoa, Cassie
You're a dream I can't let go
I knew that when I found the one, I'd know
This time I feel, this time it's from my heart
And I pledge you my devotion from the start
Whoa
I only hope that you will say I do
And stay with me 'til death do us apart
Whoa, Cassie
Won't you tell me what to do ?
I wanna spend my life in love with you
Whoa, Cassie
You're a dream I can't let go
I knew that when I found the one, I'd know
And I've spent so many nights
Alone and out of view
But it's been worth the wait to fall in love with you