Heim (2025) Movie Script
1
Annie.
Are you ready?
I don't think I can do this.
Maybe I shouldn't.
Breathe. Calm down.
You're Amazing Annie!
Of course you can do this.
You'll only be in the water
for a few seconds.
The actual jump will take longer.
Getting down to the water.
I just came to take this
and wish you good luck.
- How many of those have you taken?
- Just one more.
Go easy on those Thai pills.
Give me one of these.
Annie! Annie! Annie!
You're the queen
of Norwegian children's TV.
You'll be alright.
I almost forgot.
Put this on, you'll look even cooler.
Okay...
Put the blond kids at the front so it
doesn't look like a UNICEF commercial.
We're live in three, two...
To Braffen, all the viewers at home
and all the children here:
Welcome to the Braffen Summer Show!
Camera two.
Make sure you get the landing.
Are you ready for Amazing Annie?
Are you ready, Annie?
Try shaking less.
She's going to dive off...
If you have to shake,
shake your booty.
...broadcast live to the whole nation...
Camera three.
What is she doing?
Doesn't she know we're live?
Go, Amazing Annie! Go, Amazing Annie!
Okay.
Annie. It's just water.
Go, Amazing Annie!
Shit. Has she lost her mind?
Move over. Move your kid.
Fuck off, you old cunt!
And take those shitty kids with you!
Annie! Less aggression, please.
I said I didn't want to swim!
You fucking...
Oh, you're so cute. So fucking cute!
Don't hurt Braffen!
Let go!
Cuntflap!
I was very clear. I did not want to swim.
- Annie, baby. Chill out.
- Chill out?
This is about you
being intoxicated on live TV.
Fucking unfair! You can't suspend me!
You threw up on your colleagues,
you swore in front of children.
I swore?
It wasn't even that bad, it was just...
- No one died.
- I'd be very careful if I were you.
We've been summoned
to the advisory board.
Your little stunt is all over
social media.
You've dragged
the whole network into the dirt.
This discussion is over.
You are hereby suspended.
That went alright.
Alright?
It could've gone worse. Take some time.
Think about what you really want...
- I want my job!
- Annie, baby.
You almost killed Braffen.
Everyone loves Braffen.
But they don't really love you right now.
I think we need to
suspend our arrangement too.
Go home for a while.
What? I'm not fucking going home.
The taxi company went bust.
Hello!
- Hello, Kjell Rune.
- Are you back home?
- Just a quick visit.
- You're not traveling light.
I'm just storing some stuff
at my mother's. Temporarily.
- I would offer you a ride, but...
- I'll get an Uber.
Yeah, right.
I saw you on TV.
Yeah, that was...
- Does Mette know you're here?
- No, it was on a whim.
- The whole trip.
- Well, give me a call.
If you want to... hang out, or something.
Nice seeing you.
Hello?
Shit. Mum?
- What the fuck?
- Can you turn that off?
My god! I forgot you were coming today!
Baby girl.
You look like a mess.
Come here.
- Why didn't you call?
- I did. About fourteen times.
You should start locking
the front door if you're this jumpy.
We don't lock our doors here!
I don't have any food for you.
I have some soup, but it's in the freezer.
That's fine. I'll heat it
in the microwave.
What are you saying?
You can't microwave Indery-soup!
Nonsense!
Where are you off to?
Mum!
How long are you staying?
Two weeks, tops.
I'm going to get my job back.
It's good to have you home, baby girl.
See you!
Hello.
Hello.
The fuck are you doing here?
- Well, look here!
- That's private.
Are there any photos of Kjell in here?
Aw, Erik!
Handsome Erik!
Are you seriously staying here?
For the entire summer?
What a shit plan. Oh my god.
- Hello!
- Hello!
Back home, are you?
And you can stay as long as you want.
But it's good to have a time frame.
- Can everyone just stop nagging me!
- Everyone?
This could be a real opportunity!
Look at this.
- It's less than a cupboard in Tyenlkka.
- It's Grnerlkka.
Besides, they make TV outside of Oslo too.
Mum, it was on national TV.
It was everywhere!
- On every social media platform...
- Cuntflap!
Cuntflap!
- Everyone's forgot by now.
- Yeah, right.
Where are you going?
I can't get the phone right now,
but leave a message at the beep.
- On the house.
- Thanks.
For the local hero who vomited all over
the country's favorite mascot.
Well!
- Fancy seeing you here.
- Fancy that.
Yep.
Anni!
Sorry, Anni! Oh my god.
Kjell Rune has been gossiping.
Trygve, look who I found!
Come on. Come!
Fucking cock munchers! Stop that.
These knuckle heads
will be paying the bill tonight.
It's been so long!
Guys, why don't we do a homecoming party?
Down by the water!
That's really not necessary.
- We can do it at my farm.
- Or at the Steinkjer festival.
- Cheers!
- Cheers.
- Pl Gunnar, do you still make moonshine?
- Sure do.
- No problem.
- Do you need booze?
Our man Jan Helge
has two stills, at least.
Well, I dabble.
Here and there.
I'm not getting rich any time soon.
I just need to make a call.
We don't need that much.
- But it's all good?
- Yes.
This is Isak. I can't get the phone right
now, but leave a message at the beep.
Hello. It's me.
I need a bit of support, because
I'm having a really shit time here.
They're such a bunch of peasants.
You wouldn't believe it.
They're seriously talking about moonshine!
And tractors!
I can't breathe.
They're so incredibly backwards.
I need my job back, Isak.
Just call me, please. Please.
It's Annie, by the way.
- Cigarette?
- No, thank you.
We'll do afters all night long!
Oh, no! We know what happens
when you get on the moonshine!
Like that time you ran over your cow!
How long are you here for, Anni?
Not that long.
I just need to get my job back. So...
I work at the rehab center. We need
more people. It's the best job ever.
- Well...
- Are you laughing at me?
- Taxi driver. You know we need that.
- Tricky without a driving license.
What kind of big city crap is that?
You need your license!
Pl Gunnar!
Hello, everybody!
Good to see so many of you here.
Punk is still alive in this town!
I've got a new favorite expression,
and here's a song inspired by it.
This is Cuntflap!
- H... Hello? Hi. Isak?
- You called me a hundred times last night
I'm really sorry.
My behavior was completely inappropriate.
It's just... I told you so many times.
I don't want to go in the water. I don't.
Annie, let me see what I can do.
No promises.
No... Yes... No...
- You have to be chill.
- Completely chill. Definitely.
Super chill. And... Okay, bye.
- Fucking hell. This is my room!
- It's actually Tove's room.
Mouthy bitch.
"Three things I have to do
to get with Erik:"
"1. Become cooler
2. Learn how to put on makeup."
"3. Get into sports and outdoorsy stuff"?
- How's that plan coming along?
- That was a hundred years ago.
He's really fit still, so you need
to shape up if you want to bag him.
I'm not going to "bag" him. Jesus.
I'm not going to shag some guy
who peaked in junior high.
Are you wearing that?
There.
Great.
I thought The Meat Mountain with a little
bit of everything might hit the spot?
Lots of goodies from
Indery Abattoir and a wine pairing.
You know me so well!
It's important to eat well
when life's got you down.
Did you see that?
That pitying look? They're everywhere!
I can't function as
a normal person in this town.
- It's always been like this.
- No, it hasn't.
It's not the town, it's you.
You have to move on. Smile at the world!
I smile!
I fucking smile all fucking day!
That attitude, "Be happy no matter what"!
Did you get knocked up by a stranger
who never showed up? Smile!
Did you get dumped? Just smile!
Eh? Smile a little!
I vomited all over our biggest
children's TV star during prime time!
Don't get worked up! Just smile!
Even if the world's burning...
I never said you always have to be happy!
But you have to make an effort. Go for it.
You could have a real career here, too.
Stop being so fucking stuck-up!
You're not better than us
because you live in the big city!
I'm definitely not worse!
All I'm saying is that life might not
turn out the way you planned it.
- But it can still be good!
- I need some fresh air!
Fucking brat!
Jesus!
I'm sorry.
I'm sure it'll be fine.
I'll close up early.
I'll be right over. Wait for me.
Hi, Oddbjrn.
Anni!
Good to see you!
- I heard you were in town.
- Yeah.
I've been expecting you.
Come. Oh, that whole thing.
That was a bit unfortunate.
But I'll tell you what.
People in Steinkjer don't give
a flying fuck about what happens in Oslo.
They definitely cared when my mum
and I had a public spat just now.
So you think people
will gossip about that for twenty years?
At least you're giving them
something to talk about. Again.
That's the great thing about Steinkjer.
You can step in it
as often as you like. It's still here.
- Nothing's changed.
- Exactly.
Never change a winning team.
This is embarrassing, but...
I'm actually meeting someone.
- Do you have a date?
- Heavens, no!
Oddbjrn Johansen!
I'm meeting my care worker.
I don't want to kick you out.
- Oh, it's now! Let's go.
- No, listen.
Why don't you cover for me
the last half hour?
Everything is the same
as when you worked here.
- I can give it a go.
- Fabulous!
There you go!
The door's a little jammy.
But other than that...
Just say the word,
and you can have your old job back.
Right. I'll... let you know.
Have fun with your care worker!
Can I have a chocolate milk?
Is Oddbjrn around?
Anni?
Erik.
- Hi.
- Hi.
I have to pay for my petrol.
Yes.
Pump 2.
Pump 2.
- Have you started working here again?
- No, I'm just helping Oddbjrn tonight.
Right. No more children's
TV for a while, perhaps.
That was the funniest
thing I've ever seen.
I loved it.
Well, you've got to
put yourself out there.
It was good to see you.
Oh. My. God.
You were flirting with Erik Schei-Hansen!
Fucking hell!
You realize that
if he sees you in here every day...
He's going to fall head over heels!
Since you're stuck here anyway.
You need someone to shag!
Stop it!
Just imagine.
Erik Schei-Hansen - and Anni!
Yeah. Anni Schei-Hansen.
- Sounds good.
- It really does.
Hey!
I've signed up to volunteer today.
- And you, too.
- Mum, you're retired!
- Can't you just take it easy?
- I have a responsibility to the community.
And it wouldn't hurt you
to chip in and do your bit.
Anni.
- Having you here, just like before.
- No, I'm not here.
It's just like before.
In here!
Anni!
Jesus!
I had to get out of the house. The boys
and Trygve are driving me up the wall!
- I'll get you a coffee.
- Come for a run.
Or come volunteering.
And my youngest, Magnus.
He thinks it's offensive to people
who can't or won't get confirmed.
I've already booked the venue!
Be fucking thankful you don't have kids.
They're so annoying. Sometimes
I want to throw them into the sea!
Hello!
- My god, I'm sorry.
- It sounds fucking awful.
I'm so glad you came. Thank you.
Have you been to see Ella yet?
Anni?
I've been too busy with work,
I haven't had time.
Busy every day.
I see. But you could come with me now.
I don't have time. I have to
help Oddbjrn at the petrol station.
This was really fun, I just have to go!
Bye!
One big hot dog and a double.
I think I'm actually happy.
Many people find love as adults.
Why don't they write songs about that?
I hope I didn't bore
you with my life story.
I'm sorry.
- I'm a little out of it...
- No worries.
I've seen it many times. Oh, yes.
It's the hot dog zombie disease.
It's a danger in this line of work.
You should get hazard
pay for working here.
We should just fuck off the customers.
Get rid of the pumps.
And the washer fluid and the popcorn...
Actually, that popcorn can stay.
Right? And then, picture this:
15 or 16 Chevy American diner booths.
Right? And tables, and...
And here -
get rid of the fridges and freezers.
And put in a giant stage!
We could have concerts and quizzes.
People think they need washer fluid,
mass produced popcorn and firelighters.
But what they actually need...
...is food and music. Karaoke!
- Oddbjrn! That's real ambition!
- "Ambition is a dream with a V8 engine!"
You should go for it!
- We take things slow in Steinkjer.
- Hello.
Hello.
I'm going to check up on Erik.
- This is a good job.
- I'm just helping Oddbjrn out.
- I was going to tell you, I just...
- Didn't have my number?
- Hungry?
- Always.
- You and your pineapple.
- It's the Steinkjer burger!
How you got away with that unpunished...
What really happened on that diving tower?
When you're deathly terrified of water,
you need some good, old-fashioned courage.
You can't go through life being...
deathly terrified of water.
- It doesn't matter.
- It does matter.
- It's something tangible we can work on.
- We?
I can help you. In the swimming pool.
I'm not fucking going
in the local swimming pool.
- I'm done with...
- I'm a Red Cross volunteer.
I teach kids to swim. I have keys.
We can go at any time.
If I promise to eat
an entire fucking pineapple burger?
- Promise?
- Hell yes.
Maybe you'll even get the swimming badge.
- Have a bite.
- No! Get that away from me!
You're not right in the head.
What's your name? Lily. Let's see.
Oh, that's a nasty one.
Alright, Nurse Anni.
- I need your help.
- Alright?
- Doctor Erik. Here you go.
- Thanks.
This is going to sting a little. Ready?
- And now we need a band-aid.
- Absolutely.
- Do we need to amputate, Nurse Anni?
- I'm unsure, Doctor Erik.
- Shall I get the saw?
- No, not the saw!
The plaster will do.
There.
- Now, be careful in the street, okay?
- Yes.
Doctor Erik,
you've got some blood on your coat.
I have a spare in the car.
I'll just get changed.
You're all fixed up. You can just...
Can you take her home?
Yeah...
Yes, of course.
- I'm visiting Grandma.
- To Grandma we go, then.
- Yes.
- Alright.
- Good job.
- Thanks.
And I got to meet Amazing Annie!
- That tattoo is really... cool.
- You like it?
It's so... big.
I have to work out, so it looks good.
But I do work out quite a bit. And you?
- Do you work out?
- All the time. I mean, normally.
All the time.
But lately, I've been a bit... busy.
But I can feel the urge...
The need to get back and...
...use my body again. I miss it.
Let me know if you want to
go work out or go climbing.
- Or whatever.
- Whatever.
Awesome.
Jesus.
You were the one who
wanted me to get a job!
It's not a job!
You're just helping out Oddbjrn.
And I thought you had loftier goals than
your summer job from when you were 16.
You're so talented.
You could easily get a real job here.
Or an apartment.
- Am I inconveniencing you?
- Honestly? Yes.
You are inconveniencing me.
You can obviously
stay as long as you want.
I'm your mother.
But I'm my own person as well.
With my own life.
And you need to get busy with your life.
You're responsible for your own happiness.
"I'm responsible for my own happiness!"
Get a grip, Anni!
- Stop being so childish.
- I'm not childish!
You can have this for free.
- Thank you!
- You're welcome.
Thank you. Could you have a look
at the register? It's out of order.
- Could I interest you in...
- No, thanks. No sweets after five p.m.
- We're closed.
- OK. But... what...
Come on, then, you idiot.
Doctor Erik!
Didn't recognize you with clothes on.
Anni. I just wanted to
make sure you're ready for tomorrow.
Uh, no. I can't.
- I don't have a swimsuit.
- Borrow your mother's.
- I don't know!
- My mother's!
You promised. And I promised
to eat your dumb pineapple burger.
- Yes, alright!
- Yes? Good.
Here. Have a custard roll.
I'm going to work out tomorrow afternoon.
Do you want to come?
I'd love to.
- Up Shepherd's Hill.
- Shepherd's Hill, yes.
Great. I'll see you there.
- I fixed the register, Oddbjrn.
- Thank you.
She looks like an angel
Walks like an angel
Talks like an angel
But I got wise
She's the devil in disguise
- Look at you.
- I told you I didn't have a swimsuit.
I just meant you got changed quickly.
I work in TV.
I can get changed like that!
Sorry, I get a bit like that
when I'm nervous.
Only when you're nervous?
Shall we get in?
- Do we have to?
- It's a choice.
You can learn to master the element
which covers 70 % of the planet.
Or you can choose not to.
No swimming badge for me, I guess.
We can try again tomorrow.
I was going to order a pizza.
Are you hungry?
- I'm a bit busy.
- Okay?
- I'm meeting Erik.
- Wow. He's still got it.
- Jesus. We're just doing a little session.
- A little session?
We'll get dinner another time, okay?
Hey.
- Hi.
- Are you ready?
Let's take the Troll trail.
It's got lots of troll sculptures
the kids love.
- Maybe you'll like them too.
- Maybe!
We'll do intervals. Okay?
Ready? Go!
Yes, alright. Yes!
Come on!
Max speed!
Don't give up!
Not far now.
- Are you ready?
- Huh?
Ready for the next stage?
- Isn't this view insane?
- Yeah.
It's boss.
Come here. I want to show you something.
I just don't get it. It's so corny.
Every small town in Norway has to build
something gigantic to, I don't know...
...compensate for
their inferiority complex.
"We have the world's biggest kick sled!"
"We have the world's biggest
silver moose!"
"But hang on! Because in Steinkjer,
we have the world's biggest ..."
"... deck chair."
It's just dumb.
I like it.
And I think when you've accomplished
something, you deserve a treat.
I actually think I'm going to...
...have a little treat of my own.
You taste as good as you look.
Next weekend, I've got to fix
some windowsills at the cabin.
And I was wondering if you'd like to come.
Erik Schei-Hansen,
are you inviting me to your cabin?
- You don't have to help with the windows.
- Oh really?
Just enjoy ourselves.
Annie! What's up?
I don't know. You tell me.
Is there something to come back to?
What?
Do I have a job? Where are you?
Just ease yourself in.
You're a big girl now.
I'm not a girl, I'm almost forty!
Relax, that's what we tell
the cows when they're stubborn.
- First I'm a girl, now I'm a cow?
- Yes.
This is only getting better.
Cows are beautiful and
good-natured animals.
They're clever and kind, and surprisingly
stubborn when they want to be.
- It's... quite deep.
- No.
- Are you alright?
- Somewhat.
Move away from the edge.
- Don't let go.
- I'm not letting go.
Yeah.
Relax your arms.
- There you go.
- Yes.
Lean back.
- People are coming. Shit.
- Don't worry.
Come on!
Let's call it a day.
And I was thinking,
we could put a coin machine over there.
One of those, you know.
How long have you been talking about this?
A decade or two.
- Can I steal a protein bar?
- Of course.
I mean, that's up to Oddbjrn.
Or we could call the cops.
Is it here already? But is that all?
No, the rest is on the hanger.
I have to go. But we'll talk later.
What's all this?
We're building your stage.
- No!
- Why not?
Bloody hell!
At the mouth of the river
By the fjord so still
On historic soil
Under the crescent hill
Lies old Steinkjer town
Beauty all around
Old, but also new
Steinkjer, we love you
Fuck, is it that late already?
I've got a meeting.
- What about the rest?
- You're quitting mid-song!
Oddbjrn! Oddbjrn!
This was a good idea.
Looks like you and Erik
are becoming a thing.
I don't know. Maybe he likes me a little.
He's lucky. Not everyone
gets to date the human version of a cow.
I knooouhw!
That was pretty good.
Look at this guy.
What's cooking, good looking?
What kind of meeting is this?
Is it a rendezvous?
Oddbjrn! You're in love! Oh my god!
I can tell! Look!
- Oddbjrn has left the building.
- I hope she's as hot as you!
You smell nice too!
Just a bit much.
- Do we have to do it today?
- No.
Do like this: One, two, three,
the water is my friend.
Idiot.
Easy.
- You're good at this.
- I should be.
I teach kids every week.
- I'm never having kids.
- No?
- That's fine, isn't it?
- Yes.
That could change, though.
Nothing is written in stone.
No, but sometimes
you just know what you want.
That's fine. No one decides for you,
which means that you're responsible
for the choices you make.
- Okay.
- What?
- That was deep.
- No, we're still in the shallow end.
- Shall I let go of your head?
- Okay.
And breathe.
Erik is taking me to his cabin.
Do you want to try floating by yourself?
See if you feel safer.
What the fuck?
Oh my god, no!
Anni! Listen.
No! I don't want to hear or see
any of this.
- Fucking shit! Disgusting!
- Poor thing.
Disgusting!
Disgusting, alright.
- I don't mind her being "active"...
- They're adults.
- He's half her age!
- No, he's not!
You wouldn't care
if it was the other way around.
- Aright, screw that. Gossip.
- I don't gossip.
Who's been getting
a bit too friendly with the sheep?
That's a stereotype.
You have to go to Namsos for that.
It's true. I work with a guy from Namsos.
I don't trust him.
I don't remember what you do.
I develop technology
which streamlines farming.
- Well, that's actually cool.
- I don't know.
I want to run the farm.
I inherited a great farm
with lovely cattle.
But I had to sell them.
I've dreamt about this
since I was a teenager.
Ella even told me she'd help me
run the farm when we grew up.
Have you...
Have you been to see her?
Her grave?
- Fucking hell!
- My boyfriend! I'm coming!
He always comes early!
I love you and I love
that you're back home.
Say hi.
Alright.
It didn't even hit you.
Are you going to answer?
Have you been there?
I know where Oddbjrn keeps his moonshine!
I don't know if I...
Here's the blanket.
Nothing warms you up like moonshine.
It's supposed to be fucking summer.
We're in fucking Trndelag.
You smell like Trndelag.
- What?
- Here!
Do I smell like Trndelag?
That was surprisingly decent.
Fucking hell!
- It's great to have you back.
- Thank you.
I mean it. It's good that you're home.
It's almost been like it used to be.
- Right? You feel it too.
- No...
Take it in. Just be here and take it in.
Do you ever think about her?
Well.
Steinkjer burger for breakfast?
I just need to...
I'm feeling a little bit...
Oh fuck.
Are you feeling sick?
No.
This was... maybe not exactly...
I know that...
Could you hand me my top? The yellow one.
Thanks.
- Things didn't quite go to plan.
- No. They went all wrong.
- Okay. What...
- You weren't my...
Can we just pretend this never happened?
Of course.
- I'm going to that cabin with Erik.
- Yeah, awesome.
Alright.
- Are those my socks?
- Yes.
Alright.
Awesome.
You're so fucking selfish.
He's my boyfriend!
Shut up.
You shut up.
Fucking cuntflap.
What did you call me?
What did you just say?
Are you going to fuck the entire town?
You know what?
Maybe I am.
How low were your expectations?
You just didn't look that outdoorsy.
- But it suits you.
- I'm not doing too bad!
After you.
Do you have a condom?
I'm really good at pulling out.
My boys are well trained.
Wait, wait, wait.
I'm sorry.
Fuck.
- I got a bit excited.
- Me too, I just can't take any chances.
You don't have forever, you know.
What?
Fertility declines sharply with age.
- Excuse me?
- It's true.
Did it ever occur to you
that I don't want children?
- You just haven't thought it through.
- Fucking hell!
- Is this because I don't want to fuck?
- It's not about fucking.
I can fuck anyone. That's not the point.
"The handsome macho man only wants pussy."
Jesus Christ.
It's like I'm nothing more than my looks.
You're the one who just wants to fuck.
I'm almost forty.
And I really want to make something work.
Maybe get married, have a kid.
Someone I can go hiking with.
But I don't want that.
I want you to leave.
- What?
- I'm serious.
I want you to leave.
Erik. It's the middle of the night.
Come on.
Fucking cunty forest!
You fucking annoying
shit! Can you fuck off?
- He kicked you out?
- In the middle of the night.
Just because I don't want
a husband and children.
You can't tell men that! Women who are
different make them insecure.
If you kept your mouth shut,
you might get laid once in a while.
And we all need hot and
heavy sex sometimes.
Mum!
Sorry for being childish.
It's not my business who you're dating.
- I overreacted.
- You did.
- Hey, I'm trying here.
- And you're doing great.
Come down to the petrol station tonight.
There's a show!
Show? What kind of show?
You all know him as Oddbjrn.
The nicest station attendant around.
But tonight, he's Oddbjrn Elvis Johansen!
- We need you in Oslo.
- What?
I miss you and I've talked to the network
They want you to...
- What's the concept?
- A brand new one. All about you.
Bye.
Oddbjrn?
Alright.
- Are you leaving?
- You scared me.
Well, will you look at this.
"My plan for getting with Erik:"
One, two, three bullet points.
You're a real go-getter!
- I was fourteen.
- You're still chasing him.
- I'm not.
- You are too!
Did you forget you went on
a sexy cabin trip with him
five minutes after shagging me?
- Was I just the warm-up?
- Stop it!
- Or was it that wanted to talk about Ella?
- You're so childish! And unfair!
That might be true, but so are you.
Every time you come back,
you're like a summer storm.
You blow through here
doing whatever you fancy.
Then it's straight back to Oslo
to be a TV personality
and hang out with your VIP friends.
You weren't the only one
who lost Ella, Anni.
I lost her too.
Mette lost her. The whole town lost her.
- We're still here. You're running away.
- Can you blame me?
- I was there! I could've saved her!
- We were all there.
It's time you forgave yourself.
Fucking bullshit! You have no idea
what happened at that beach.
You were so drunk, like everyone else.
That fucking party
we never should have gone to.
She asked me to go swimming with her. She
didn't want to go alone. But I said no.
I couldn't be arsed.
I wanted to do something
for me for fucking once.
So she went by herself. And she drowned.
And it was my fault.
So don't you fucking tell me how to feel.
I'm so fucking sick.
I'm so sick of people
telling me how to fucking feel.
I'm so done with this fucking place.
I'm so done with you.
I'm so done with you, Kjell Rune!
What's going on? Is everything alright?
Anni is done with us
and running off again.
What?
I can't.
Safe travels.
Kjell Rune! Wait, for fuck's sake!
Are you sure you'll be alright?
I can stay a little longer.
Go! Chances like this
don't come every day.
Are you ready?
What are you going to do?
There's always room for you here.
The worst age group, three to four years.
They forget what they watched last year,
so getting them to keep up...
Annie, baby!
I've missed you.
You've been drinking
that raw milk, haven't you?
Well, look who's back from the dead!
Anni-Panni! Good to have you back.
It's good to be back.
And I'm so glad you got professional help.
That was really brave.
Annie.
I always thought the best part of Norway
was the mountains and fjords,
but I've realized that
the most beautiful thing is the people.
And the people stood up for you.
We've never had so much fan mail.
They want more of you.
They've never seen someone so humiliated
who can still humiliate others.
A vulnerable person
who hurts and demeans others.
It's so wrong, but simultaneously
so politically correct that...
...we've got something unique.
No more Amazing Annie.
Now it's Aggro Annie and her sofa.
- Prime time, baby. Late night TV.
- Are you kidding?
Does it look like I'm kidding?
You can have your own correspondent.
Braffen. Bloodshot eyes, with a joint,
asking all kinds of dumb questions.
This is completely insane.
I've missed you. I've missed you so much.
Yes, I...
Hey, why did Alice say
I'd sought professional help?
I told everyone you'd gone to rehab.
- You told them I went to rehab?
- Yes. Come on, give me some tongue.
I had to tell them
you were dealing with your issues.
So now we're here. Sweet.
Yes. Sweet.
You're sweet.
Out of all the feelings you're feeling
now, the overwhelming joy and arousal,
gratitude should be the strongest.
Because you won't have to
go back to that shithole
that people only drive through
to get to Northern Norway.
Or going south, fleeing
that horrible place.
They all sound like
they've got cocks in their mouths.
You sound like that sometimes.
"I'm from Stjrdal."
"I'm from Trondheim."
- Fuck you.
- Just like that! "Fuck you."
Like there's a cock in your throat.
No, fuck you! Fuck you!
I can make fun of my hometown, not you.
You don't know anything about Steinkjer.
Annie.
And it's actually pronounced Anni .
Not fucking Annie .
Don't get me wrong. It's an amazing offer.
With the sofa and all.
I just don't want to.
What do you want, then?
If you walk out that door,
you can never come back.
It's career suicide.
No! Oh!
Hi! Need a ride?
- Could you take me to Oddbjrn's?
- Sure. Just jump in.
Alright.
Shall we sit here?
We've looked over the contract.
You just need to sign,
and you're good to go.
I'm sure he'd be thrilled
you're the one taking over.
Agreed. You're so cool.
Just one thing left.
Here you go. A diner!
- Good luck! Bye.
- Thank you. Bye!
- Do you know what you're doing?
- Are you kidding? No clue.
Are you ready to see them?
- Are you ready?
- I think so.
- Hello.
- I have to tell you something.
Well, actually...
I have to tell you several things.
I couldn't find
those old diaries we used to have.
But it doesn't really matter.
It works just fine with a ..,
...new beginning.
Okay.
What I have to do
to make amends with Kjell Rune.
There's five points.
Number one:
Come home.
Number two:
Get my driving license.
That one's going to take a little while.
Number three:
Apologize.
I'm sorry I've been acting
like a piece of shit.
Anni...
I didn't mean to.
I'm sorry for running away.
Again.
And for all the other times.
I just...
I miss...
...Ella.
I've tried to forget her, but I can't.
I can't breathe when I think about her.
I miss everything.
I miss her going on about chocolate milk.
I miss her scent.
I've missed her so much, I...
...forgot...
...that you were my friend too.
I'm sorry.
- Anni.
- No.
I'm not done.
Point four:
In light of this, I want to ask...
...if you'll help me raise Nelly.
Are you...
No!
No, no.
Come.
Come!
You have to... put your shoes on.
Or whatever you call those.
Do you trust me?
Trust me.
- Close your eyes.
- Alright.
It's not dangerous.
Almost there.
There. Stop.
Open your eyes.
I thought about what you said
about wanting a cow.
I thought we could raise her together.
I can't have her at the petrol station,
so if she can live here, we could...
- I can help...
- A calf? You bought a calf?
Have you lost your marbles?
What?
You don't know anything about cattle!
You can't have just one. They get lonely!
You can have two cows, then. Or cattle.
Are you serious?
Have you come home for real?
You're the stupidest,
most wonderful person I know.
You said there were five points.
What's the fifth point?
Ella.
I love you, you fucking cuntflap.
Hello. Have you been waiting for long?
No.
- I'm glad we're finally doing this party!
- Yes!
- I can't drink all three!
- I'll take one.
What was the name of that awful...
Annie.
Are you ready?
I don't think I can do this.
Maybe I shouldn't.
Breathe. Calm down.
You're Amazing Annie!
Of course you can do this.
You'll only be in the water
for a few seconds.
The actual jump will take longer.
Getting down to the water.
I just came to take this
and wish you good luck.
- How many of those have you taken?
- Just one more.
Go easy on those Thai pills.
Give me one of these.
Annie! Annie! Annie!
You're the queen
of Norwegian children's TV.
You'll be alright.
I almost forgot.
Put this on, you'll look even cooler.
Okay...
Put the blond kids at the front so it
doesn't look like a UNICEF commercial.
We're live in three, two...
To Braffen, all the viewers at home
and all the children here:
Welcome to the Braffen Summer Show!
Camera two.
Make sure you get the landing.
Are you ready for Amazing Annie?
Are you ready, Annie?
Try shaking less.
She's going to dive off...
If you have to shake,
shake your booty.
...broadcast live to the whole nation...
Camera three.
What is she doing?
Doesn't she know we're live?
Go, Amazing Annie! Go, Amazing Annie!
Okay.
Annie. It's just water.
Go, Amazing Annie!
Shit. Has she lost her mind?
Move over. Move your kid.
Fuck off, you old cunt!
And take those shitty kids with you!
Annie! Less aggression, please.
I said I didn't want to swim!
You fucking...
Oh, you're so cute. So fucking cute!
Don't hurt Braffen!
Let go!
Cuntflap!
I was very clear. I did not want to swim.
- Annie, baby. Chill out.
- Chill out?
This is about you
being intoxicated on live TV.
Fucking unfair! You can't suspend me!
You threw up on your colleagues,
you swore in front of children.
I swore?
It wasn't even that bad, it was just...
- No one died.
- I'd be very careful if I were you.
We've been summoned
to the advisory board.
Your little stunt is all over
social media.
You've dragged
the whole network into the dirt.
This discussion is over.
You are hereby suspended.
That went alright.
Alright?
It could've gone worse. Take some time.
Think about what you really want...
- I want my job!
- Annie, baby.
You almost killed Braffen.
Everyone loves Braffen.
But they don't really love you right now.
I think we need to
suspend our arrangement too.
Go home for a while.
What? I'm not fucking going home.
The taxi company went bust.
Hello!
- Hello, Kjell Rune.
- Are you back home?
- Just a quick visit.
- You're not traveling light.
I'm just storing some stuff
at my mother's. Temporarily.
- I would offer you a ride, but...
- I'll get an Uber.
Yeah, right.
I saw you on TV.
Yeah, that was...
- Does Mette know you're here?
- No, it was on a whim.
- The whole trip.
- Well, give me a call.
If you want to... hang out, or something.
Nice seeing you.
Hello?
Shit. Mum?
- What the fuck?
- Can you turn that off?
My god! I forgot you were coming today!
Baby girl.
You look like a mess.
Come here.
- Why didn't you call?
- I did. About fourteen times.
You should start locking
the front door if you're this jumpy.
We don't lock our doors here!
I don't have any food for you.
I have some soup, but it's in the freezer.
That's fine. I'll heat it
in the microwave.
What are you saying?
You can't microwave Indery-soup!
Nonsense!
Where are you off to?
Mum!
How long are you staying?
Two weeks, tops.
I'm going to get my job back.
It's good to have you home, baby girl.
See you!
Hello.
Hello.
The fuck are you doing here?
- Well, look here!
- That's private.
Are there any photos of Kjell in here?
Aw, Erik!
Handsome Erik!
Are you seriously staying here?
For the entire summer?
What a shit plan. Oh my god.
- Hello!
- Hello!
Back home, are you?
And you can stay as long as you want.
But it's good to have a time frame.
- Can everyone just stop nagging me!
- Everyone?
This could be a real opportunity!
Look at this.
- It's less than a cupboard in Tyenlkka.
- It's Grnerlkka.
Besides, they make TV outside of Oslo too.
Mum, it was on national TV.
It was everywhere!
- On every social media platform...
- Cuntflap!
Cuntflap!
- Everyone's forgot by now.
- Yeah, right.
Where are you going?
I can't get the phone right now,
but leave a message at the beep.
- On the house.
- Thanks.
For the local hero who vomited all over
the country's favorite mascot.
Well!
- Fancy seeing you here.
- Fancy that.
Yep.
Anni!
Sorry, Anni! Oh my god.
Kjell Rune has been gossiping.
Trygve, look who I found!
Come on. Come!
Fucking cock munchers! Stop that.
These knuckle heads
will be paying the bill tonight.
It's been so long!
Guys, why don't we do a homecoming party?
Down by the water!
That's really not necessary.
- We can do it at my farm.
- Or at the Steinkjer festival.
- Cheers!
- Cheers.
- Pl Gunnar, do you still make moonshine?
- Sure do.
- No problem.
- Do you need booze?
Our man Jan Helge
has two stills, at least.
Well, I dabble.
Here and there.
I'm not getting rich any time soon.
I just need to make a call.
We don't need that much.
- But it's all good?
- Yes.
This is Isak. I can't get the phone right
now, but leave a message at the beep.
Hello. It's me.
I need a bit of support, because
I'm having a really shit time here.
They're such a bunch of peasants.
You wouldn't believe it.
They're seriously talking about moonshine!
And tractors!
I can't breathe.
They're so incredibly backwards.
I need my job back, Isak.
Just call me, please. Please.
It's Annie, by the way.
- Cigarette?
- No, thank you.
We'll do afters all night long!
Oh, no! We know what happens
when you get on the moonshine!
Like that time you ran over your cow!
How long are you here for, Anni?
Not that long.
I just need to get my job back. So...
I work at the rehab center. We need
more people. It's the best job ever.
- Well...
- Are you laughing at me?
- Taxi driver. You know we need that.
- Tricky without a driving license.
What kind of big city crap is that?
You need your license!
Pl Gunnar!
Hello, everybody!
Good to see so many of you here.
Punk is still alive in this town!
I've got a new favorite expression,
and here's a song inspired by it.
This is Cuntflap!
- H... Hello? Hi. Isak?
- You called me a hundred times last night
I'm really sorry.
My behavior was completely inappropriate.
It's just... I told you so many times.
I don't want to go in the water. I don't.
Annie, let me see what I can do.
No promises.
No... Yes... No...
- You have to be chill.
- Completely chill. Definitely.
Super chill. And... Okay, bye.
- Fucking hell. This is my room!
- It's actually Tove's room.
Mouthy bitch.
"Three things I have to do
to get with Erik:"
"1. Become cooler
2. Learn how to put on makeup."
"3. Get into sports and outdoorsy stuff"?
- How's that plan coming along?
- That was a hundred years ago.
He's really fit still, so you need
to shape up if you want to bag him.
I'm not going to "bag" him. Jesus.
I'm not going to shag some guy
who peaked in junior high.
Are you wearing that?
There.
Great.
I thought The Meat Mountain with a little
bit of everything might hit the spot?
Lots of goodies from
Indery Abattoir and a wine pairing.
You know me so well!
It's important to eat well
when life's got you down.
Did you see that?
That pitying look? They're everywhere!
I can't function as
a normal person in this town.
- It's always been like this.
- No, it hasn't.
It's not the town, it's you.
You have to move on. Smile at the world!
I smile!
I fucking smile all fucking day!
That attitude, "Be happy no matter what"!
Did you get knocked up by a stranger
who never showed up? Smile!
Did you get dumped? Just smile!
Eh? Smile a little!
I vomited all over our biggest
children's TV star during prime time!
Don't get worked up! Just smile!
Even if the world's burning...
I never said you always have to be happy!
But you have to make an effort. Go for it.
You could have a real career here, too.
Stop being so fucking stuck-up!
You're not better than us
because you live in the big city!
I'm definitely not worse!
All I'm saying is that life might not
turn out the way you planned it.
- But it can still be good!
- I need some fresh air!
Fucking brat!
Jesus!
I'm sorry.
I'm sure it'll be fine.
I'll close up early.
I'll be right over. Wait for me.
Hi, Oddbjrn.
Anni!
Good to see you!
- I heard you were in town.
- Yeah.
I've been expecting you.
Come. Oh, that whole thing.
That was a bit unfortunate.
But I'll tell you what.
People in Steinkjer don't give
a flying fuck about what happens in Oslo.
They definitely cared when my mum
and I had a public spat just now.
So you think people
will gossip about that for twenty years?
At least you're giving them
something to talk about. Again.
That's the great thing about Steinkjer.
You can step in it
as often as you like. It's still here.
- Nothing's changed.
- Exactly.
Never change a winning team.
This is embarrassing, but...
I'm actually meeting someone.
- Do you have a date?
- Heavens, no!
Oddbjrn Johansen!
I'm meeting my care worker.
I don't want to kick you out.
- Oh, it's now! Let's go.
- No, listen.
Why don't you cover for me
the last half hour?
Everything is the same
as when you worked here.
- I can give it a go.
- Fabulous!
There you go!
The door's a little jammy.
But other than that...
Just say the word,
and you can have your old job back.
Right. I'll... let you know.
Have fun with your care worker!
Can I have a chocolate milk?
Is Oddbjrn around?
Anni?
Erik.
- Hi.
- Hi.
I have to pay for my petrol.
Yes.
Pump 2.
Pump 2.
- Have you started working here again?
- No, I'm just helping Oddbjrn tonight.
Right. No more children's
TV for a while, perhaps.
That was the funniest
thing I've ever seen.
I loved it.
Well, you've got to
put yourself out there.
It was good to see you.
Oh. My. God.
You were flirting with Erik Schei-Hansen!
Fucking hell!
You realize that
if he sees you in here every day...
He's going to fall head over heels!
Since you're stuck here anyway.
You need someone to shag!
Stop it!
Just imagine.
Erik Schei-Hansen - and Anni!
Yeah. Anni Schei-Hansen.
- Sounds good.
- It really does.
Hey!
I've signed up to volunteer today.
- And you, too.
- Mum, you're retired!
- Can't you just take it easy?
- I have a responsibility to the community.
And it wouldn't hurt you
to chip in and do your bit.
Anni.
- Having you here, just like before.
- No, I'm not here.
It's just like before.
In here!
Anni!
Jesus!
I had to get out of the house. The boys
and Trygve are driving me up the wall!
- I'll get you a coffee.
- Come for a run.
Or come volunteering.
And my youngest, Magnus.
He thinks it's offensive to people
who can't or won't get confirmed.
I've already booked the venue!
Be fucking thankful you don't have kids.
They're so annoying. Sometimes
I want to throw them into the sea!
Hello!
- My god, I'm sorry.
- It sounds fucking awful.
I'm so glad you came. Thank you.
Have you been to see Ella yet?
Anni?
I've been too busy with work,
I haven't had time.
Busy every day.
I see. But you could come with me now.
I don't have time. I have to
help Oddbjrn at the petrol station.
This was really fun, I just have to go!
Bye!
One big hot dog and a double.
I think I'm actually happy.
Many people find love as adults.
Why don't they write songs about that?
I hope I didn't bore
you with my life story.
I'm sorry.
- I'm a little out of it...
- No worries.
I've seen it many times. Oh, yes.
It's the hot dog zombie disease.
It's a danger in this line of work.
You should get hazard
pay for working here.
We should just fuck off the customers.
Get rid of the pumps.
And the washer fluid and the popcorn...
Actually, that popcorn can stay.
Right? And then, picture this:
15 or 16 Chevy American diner booths.
Right? And tables, and...
And here -
get rid of the fridges and freezers.
And put in a giant stage!
We could have concerts and quizzes.
People think they need washer fluid,
mass produced popcorn and firelighters.
But what they actually need...
...is food and music. Karaoke!
- Oddbjrn! That's real ambition!
- "Ambition is a dream with a V8 engine!"
You should go for it!
- We take things slow in Steinkjer.
- Hello.
Hello.
I'm going to check up on Erik.
- This is a good job.
- I'm just helping Oddbjrn out.
- I was going to tell you, I just...
- Didn't have my number?
- Hungry?
- Always.
- You and your pineapple.
- It's the Steinkjer burger!
How you got away with that unpunished...
What really happened on that diving tower?
When you're deathly terrified of water,
you need some good, old-fashioned courage.
You can't go through life being...
deathly terrified of water.
- It doesn't matter.
- It does matter.
- It's something tangible we can work on.
- We?
I can help you. In the swimming pool.
I'm not fucking going
in the local swimming pool.
- I'm done with...
- I'm a Red Cross volunteer.
I teach kids to swim. I have keys.
We can go at any time.
If I promise to eat
an entire fucking pineapple burger?
- Promise?
- Hell yes.
Maybe you'll even get the swimming badge.
- Have a bite.
- No! Get that away from me!
You're not right in the head.
What's your name? Lily. Let's see.
Oh, that's a nasty one.
Alright, Nurse Anni.
- I need your help.
- Alright?
- Doctor Erik. Here you go.
- Thanks.
This is going to sting a little. Ready?
- And now we need a band-aid.
- Absolutely.
- Do we need to amputate, Nurse Anni?
- I'm unsure, Doctor Erik.
- Shall I get the saw?
- No, not the saw!
The plaster will do.
There.
- Now, be careful in the street, okay?
- Yes.
Doctor Erik,
you've got some blood on your coat.
I have a spare in the car.
I'll just get changed.
You're all fixed up. You can just...
Can you take her home?
Yeah...
Yes, of course.
- I'm visiting Grandma.
- To Grandma we go, then.
- Yes.
- Alright.
- Good job.
- Thanks.
And I got to meet Amazing Annie!
- That tattoo is really... cool.
- You like it?
It's so... big.
I have to work out, so it looks good.
But I do work out quite a bit. And you?
- Do you work out?
- All the time. I mean, normally.
All the time.
But lately, I've been a bit... busy.
But I can feel the urge...
The need to get back and...
...use my body again. I miss it.
Let me know if you want to
go work out or go climbing.
- Or whatever.
- Whatever.
Awesome.
Jesus.
You were the one who
wanted me to get a job!
It's not a job!
You're just helping out Oddbjrn.
And I thought you had loftier goals than
your summer job from when you were 16.
You're so talented.
You could easily get a real job here.
Or an apartment.
- Am I inconveniencing you?
- Honestly? Yes.
You are inconveniencing me.
You can obviously
stay as long as you want.
I'm your mother.
But I'm my own person as well.
With my own life.
And you need to get busy with your life.
You're responsible for your own happiness.
"I'm responsible for my own happiness!"
Get a grip, Anni!
- Stop being so childish.
- I'm not childish!
You can have this for free.
- Thank you!
- You're welcome.
Thank you. Could you have a look
at the register? It's out of order.
- Could I interest you in...
- No, thanks. No sweets after five p.m.
- We're closed.
- OK. But... what...
Come on, then, you idiot.
Doctor Erik!
Didn't recognize you with clothes on.
Anni. I just wanted to
make sure you're ready for tomorrow.
Uh, no. I can't.
- I don't have a swimsuit.
- Borrow your mother's.
- I don't know!
- My mother's!
You promised. And I promised
to eat your dumb pineapple burger.
- Yes, alright!
- Yes? Good.
Here. Have a custard roll.
I'm going to work out tomorrow afternoon.
Do you want to come?
I'd love to.
- Up Shepherd's Hill.
- Shepherd's Hill, yes.
Great. I'll see you there.
- I fixed the register, Oddbjrn.
- Thank you.
She looks like an angel
Walks like an angel
Talks like an angel
But I got wise
She's the devil in disguise
- Look at you.
- I told you I didn't have a swimsuit.
I just meant you got changed quickly.
I work in TV.
I can get changed like that!
Sorry, I get a bit like that
when I'm nervous.
Only when you're nervous?
Shall we get in?
- Do we have to?
- It's a choice.
You can learn to master the element
which covers 70 % of the planet.
Or you can choose not to.
No swimming badge for me, I guess.
We can try again tomorrow.
I was going to order a pizza.
Are you hungry?
- I'm a bit busy.
- Okay?
- I'm meeting Erik.
- Wow. He's still got it.
- Jesus. We're just doing a little session.
- A little session?
We'll get dinner another time, okay?
Hey.
- Hi.
- Are you ready?
Let's take the Troll trail.
It's got lots of troll sculptures
the kids love.
- Maybe you'll like them too.
- Maybe!
We'll do intervals. Okay?
Ready? Go!
Yes, alright. Yes!
Come on!
Max speed!
Don't give up!
Not far now.
- Are you ready?
- Huh?
Ready for the next stage?
- Isn't this view insane?
- Yeah.
It's boss.
Come here. I want to show you something.
I just don't get it. It's so corny.
Every small town in Norway has to build
something gigantic to, I don't know...
...compensate for
their inferiority complex.
"We have the world's biggest kick sled!"
"We have the world's biggest
silver moose!"
"But hang on! Because in Steinkjer,
we have the world's biggest ..."
"... deck chair."
It's just dumb.
I like it.
And I think when you've accomplished
something, you deserve a treat.
I actually think I'm going to...
...have a little treat of my own.
You taste as good as you look.
Next weekend, I've got to fix
some windowsills at the cabin.
And I was wondering if you'd like to come.
Erik Schei-Hansen,
are you inviting me to your cabin?
- You don't have to help with the windows.
- Oh really?
Just enjoy ourselves.
Annie! What's up?
I don't know. You tell me.
Is there something to come back to?
What?
Do I have a job? Where are you?
Just ease yourself in.
You're a big girl now.
I'm not a girl, I'm almost forty!
Relax, that's what we tell
the cows when they're stubborn.
- First I'm a girl, now I'm a cow?
- Yes.
This is only getting better.
Cows are beautiful and
good-natured animals.
They're clever and kind, and surprisingly
stubborn when they want to be.
- It's... quite deep.
- No.
- Are you alright?
- Somewhat.
Move away from the edge.
- Don't let go.
- I'm not letting go.
Yeah.
Relax your arms.
- There you go.
- Yes.
Lean back.
- People are coming. Shit.
- Don't worry.
Come on!
Let's call it a day.
And I was thinking,
we could put a coin machine over there.
One of those, you know.
How long have you been talking about this?
A decade or two.
- Can I steal a protein bar?
- Of course.
I mean, that's up to Oddbjrn.
Or we could call the cops.
Is it here already? But is that all?
No, the rest is on the hanger.
I have to go. But we'll talk later.
What's all this?
We're building your stage.
- No!
- Why not?
Bloody hell!
At the mouth of the river
By the fjord so still
On historic soil
Under the crescent hill
Lies old Steinkjer town
Beauty all around
Old, but also new
Steinkjer, we love you
Fuck, is it that late already?
I've got a meeting.
- What about the rest?
- You're quitting mid-song!
Oddbjrn! Oddbjrn!
This was a good idea.
Looks like you and Erik
are becoming a thing.
I don't know. Maybe he likes me a little.
He's lucky. Not everyone
gets to date the human version of a cow.
I knooouhw!
That was pretty good.
Look at this guy.
What's cooking, good looking?
What kind of meeting is this?
Is it a rendezvous?
Oddbjrn! You're in love! Oh my god!
I can tell! Look!
- Oddbjrn has left the building.
- I hope she's as hot as you!
You smell nice too!
Just a bit much.
- Do we have to do it today?
- No.
Do like this: One, two, three,
the water is my friend.
Idiot.
Easy.
- You're good at this.
- I should be.
I teach kids every week.
- I'm never having kids.
- No?
- That's fine, isn't it?
- Yes.
That could change, though.
Nothing is written in stone.
No, but sometimes
you just know what you want.
That's fine. No one decides for you,
which means that you're responsible
for the choices you make.
- Okay.
- What?
- That was deep.
- No, we're still in the shallow end.
- Shall I let go of your head?
- Okay.
And breathe.
Erik is taking me to his cabin.
Do you want to try floating by yourself?
See if you feel safer.
What the fuck?
Oh my god, no!
Anni! Listen.
No! I don't want to hear or see
any of this.
- Fucking shit! Disgusting!
- Poor thing.
Disgusting!
Disgusting, alright.
- I don't mind her being "active"...
- They're adults.
- He's half her age!
- No, he's not!
You wouldn't care
if it was the other way around.
- Aright, screw that. Gossip.
- I don't gossip.
Who's been getting
a bit too friendly with the sheep?
That's a stereotype.
You have to go to Namsos for that.
It's true. I work with a guy from Namsos.
I don't trust him.
I don't remember what you do.
I develop technology
which streamlines farming.
- Well, that's actually cool.
- I don't know.
I want to run the farm.
I inherited a great farm
with lovely cattle.
But I had to sell them.
I've dreamt about this
since I was a teenager.
Ella even told me she'd help me
run the farm when we grew up.
Have you...
Have you been to see her?
Her grave?
- Fucking hell!
- My boyfriend! I'm coming!
He always comes early!
I love you and I love
that you're back home.
Say hi.
Alright.
It didn't even hit you.
Are you going to answer?
Have you been there?
I know where Oddbjrn keeps his moonshine!
I don't know if I...
Here's the blanket.
Nothing warms you up like moonshine.
It's supposed to be fucking summer.
We're in fucking Trndelag.
You smell like Trndelag.
- What?
- Here!
Do I smell like Trndelag?
That was surprisingly decent.
Fucking hell!
- It's great to have you back.
- Thank you.
I mean it. It's good that you're home.
It's almost been like it used to be.
- Right? You feel it too.
- No...
Take it in. Just be here and take it in.
Do you ever think about her?
Well.
Steinkjer burger for breakfast?
I just need to...
I'm feeling a little bit...
Oh fuck.
Are you feeling sick?
No.
This was... maybe not exactly...
I know that...
Could you hand me my top? The yellow one.
Thanks.
- Things didn't quite go to plan.
- No. They went all wrong.
- Okay. What...
- You weren't my...
Can we just pretend this never happened?
Of course.
- I'm going to that cabin with Erik.
- Yeah, awesome.
Alright.
- Are those my socks?
- Yes.
Alright.
Awesome.
You're so fucking selfish.
He's my boyfriend!
Shut up.
You shut up.
Fucking cuntflap.
What did you call me?
What did you just say?
Are you going to fuck the entire town?
You know what?
Maybe I am.
How low were your expectations?
You just didn't look that outdoorsy.
- But it suits you.
- I'm not doing too bad!
After you.
Do you have a condom?
I'm really good at pulling out.
My boys are well trained.
Wait, wait, wait.
I'm sorry.
Fuck.
- I got a bit excited.
- Me too, I just can't take any chances.
You don't have forever, you know.
What?
Fertility declines sharply with age.
- Excuse me?
- It's true.
Did it ever occur to you
that I don't want children?
- You just haven't thought it through.
- Fucking hell!
- Is this because I don't want to fuck?
- It's not about fucking.
I can fuck anyone. That's not the point.
"The handsome macho man only wants pussy."
Jesus Christ.
It's like I'm nothing more than my looks.
You're the one who just wants to fuck.
I'm almost forty.
And I really want to make something work.
Maybe get married, have a kid.
Someone I can go hiking with.
But I don't want that.
I want you to leave.
- What?
- I'm serious.
I want you to leave.
Erik. It's the middle of the night.
Come on.
Fucking cunty forest!
You fucking annoying
shit! Can you fuck off?
- He kicked you out?
- In the middle of the night.
Just because I don't want
a husband and children.
You can't tell men that! Women who are
different make them insecure.
If you kept your mouth shut,
you might get laid once in a while.
And we all need hot and
heavy sex sometimes.
Mum!
Sorry for being childish.
It's not my business who you're dating.
- I overreacted.
- You did.
- Hey, I'm trying here.
- And you're doing great.
Come down to the petrol station tonight.
There's a show!
Show? What kind of show?
You all know him as Oddbjrn.
The nicest station attendant around.
But tonight, he's Oddbjrn Elvis Johansen!
- We need you in Oslo.
- What?
I miss you and I've talked to the network
They want you to...
- What's the concept?
- A brand new one. All about you.
Bye.
Oddbjrn?
Alright.
- Are you leaving?
- You scared me.
Well, will you look at this.
"My plan for getting with Erik:"
One, two, three bullet points.
You're a real go-getter!
- I was fourteen.
- You're still chasing him.
- I'm not.
- You are too!
Did you forget you went on
a sexy cabin trip with him
five minutes after shagging me?
- Was I just the warm-up?
- Stop it!
- Or was it that wanted to talk about Ella?
- You're so childish! And unfair!
That might be true, but so are you.
Every time you come back,
you're like a summer storm.
You blow through here
doing whatever you fancy.
Then it's straight back to Oslo
to be a TV personality
and hang out with your VIP friends.
You weren't the only one
who lost Ella, Anni.
I lost her too.
Mette lost her. The whole town lost her.
- We're still here. You're running away.
- Can you blame me?
- I was there! I could've saved her!
- We were all there.
It's time you forgave yourself.
Fucking bullshit! You have no idea
what happened at that beach.
You were so drunk, like everyone else.
That fucking party
we never should have gone to.
She asked me to go swimming with her. She
didn't want to go alone. But I said no.
I couldn't be arsed.
I wanted to do something
for me for fucking once.
So she went by herself. And she drowned.
And it was my fault.
So don't you fucking tell me how to feel.
I'm so fucking sick.
I'm so sick of people
telling me how to fucking feel.
I'm so done with this fucking place.
I'm so done with you.
I'm so done with you, Kjell Rune!
What's going on? Is everything alright?
Anni is done with us
and running off again.
What?
I can't.
Safe travels.
Kjell Rune! Wait, for fuck's sake!
Are you sure you'll be alright?
I can stay a little longer.
Go! Chances like this
don't come every day.
Are you ready?
What are you going to do?
There's always room for you here.
The worst age group, three to four years.
They forget what they watched last year,
so getting them to keep up...
Annie, baby!
I've missed you.
You've been drinking
that raw milk, haven't you?
Well, look who's back from the dead!
Anni-Panni! Good to have you back.
It's good to be back.
And I'm so glad you got professional help.
That was really brave.
Annie.
I always thought the best part of Norway
was the mountains and fjords,
but I've realized that
the most beautiful thing is the people.
And the people stood up for you.
We've never had so much fan mail.
They want more of you.
They've never seen someone so humiliated
who can still humiliate others.
A vulnerable person
who hurts and demeans others.
It's so wrong, but simultaneously
so politically correct that...
...we've got something unique.
No more Amazing Annie.
Now it's Aggro Annie and her sofa.
- Prime time, baby. Late night TV.
- Are you kidding?
Does it look like I'm kidding?
You can have your own correspondent.
Braffen. Bloodshot eyes, with a joint,
asking all kinds of dumb questions.
This is completely insane.
I've missed you. I've missed you so much.
Yes, I...
Hey, why did Alice say
I'd sought professional help?
I told everyone you'd gone to rehab.
- You told them I went to rehab?
- Yes. Come on, give me some tongue.
I had to tell them
you were dealing with your issues.
So now we're here. Sweet.
Yes. Sweet.
You're sweet.
Out of all the feelings you're feeling
now, the overwhelming joy and arousal,
gratitude should be the strongest.
Because you won't have to
go back to that shithole
that people only drive through
to get to Northern Norway.
Or going south, fleeing
that horrible place.
They all sound like
they've got cocks in their mouths.
You sound like that sometimes.
"I'm from Stjrdal."
"I'm from Trondheim."
- Fuck you.
- Just like that! "Fuck you."
Like there's a cock in your throat.
No, fuck you! Fuck you!
I can make fun of my hometown, not you.
You don't know anything about Steinkjer.
Annie.
And it's actually pronounced Anni .
Not fucking Annie .
Don't get me wrong. It's an amazing offer.
With the sofa and all.
I just don't want to.
What do you want, then?
If you walk out that door,
you can never come back.
It's career suicide.
No! Oh!
Hi! Need a ride?
- Could you take me to Oddbjrn's?
- Sure. Just jump in.
Alright.
Shall we sit here?
We've looked over the contract.
You just need to sign,
and you're good to go.
I'm sure he'd be thrilled
you're the one taking over.
Agreed. You're so cool.
Just one thing left.
Here you go. A diner!
- Good luck! Bye.
- Thank you. Bye!
- Do you know what you're doing?
- Are you kidding? No clue.
Are you ready to see them?
- Are you ready?
- I think so.
- Hello.
- I have to tell you something.
Well, actually...
I have to tell you several things.
I couldn't find
those old diaries we used to have.
But it doesn't really matter.
It works just fine with a ..,
...new beginning.
Okay.
What I have to do
to make amends with Kjell Rune.
There's five points.
Number one:
Come home.
Number two:
Get my driving license.
That one's going to take a little while.
Number three:
Apologize.
I'm sorry I've been acting
like a piece of shit.
Anni...
I didn't mean to.
I'm sorry for running away.
Again.
And for all the other times.
I just...
I miss...
...Ella.
I've tried to forget her, but I can't.
I can't breathe when I think about her.
I miss everything.
I miss her going on about chocolate milk.
I miss her scent.
I've missed her so much, I...
...forgot...
...that you were my friend too.
I'm sorry.
- Anni.
- No.
I'm not done.
Point four:
In light of this, I want to ask...
...if you'll help me raise Nelly.
Are you...
No!
No, no.
Come.
Come!
You have to... put your shoes on.
Or whatever you call those.
Do you trust me?
Trust me.
- Close your eyes.
- Alright.
It's not dangerous.
Almost there.
There. Stop.
Open your eyes.
I thought about what you said
about wanting a cow.
I thought we could raise her together.
I can't have her at the petrol station,
so if she can live here, we could...
- I can help...
- A calf? You bought a calf?
Have you lost your marbles?
What?
You don't know anything about cattle!
You can't have just one. They get lonely!
You can have two cows, then. Or cattle.
Are you serious?
Have you come home for real?
You're the stupidest,
most wonderful person I know.
You said there were five points.
What's the fifth point?
Ella.
I love you, you fucking cuntflap.
Hello. Have you been waiting for long?
No.
- I'm glad we're finally doing this party!
- Yes!
- I can't drink all three!
- I'll take one.
What was the name of that awful...