Himo No Hiroshi (The Strange Saga of Hiroshi the Freeloading Sex Machine) (2005) Movie Script
CINTA impudently presents
another entertaining Nippon candy!!!
Aren't we in Kawahara yet?
There's also someone running!
Stop!
Help us please!
Since when did you peep at us?
You spied on us.
You threw down the crickets intentionally.
Since when did you watch?
Yuichiro, that's dangerous!
Not really.
Let's kiss!
Can't you wait till we're at my place?
You're having a man for sure.
A man?
Yeah, a man.
His father.
And when would it be?
What's that?
A Djemb.
What's a Djemb?
- A drum.
Drum a little for me!
Can't you wait till we're at my place?
Yuichiro!
See you soon.
See you soon, Hiroshi.
THE STRANGE SAGA OF HIROSHI,
THE FREELOADING SEX MACHINE
Production: KOKUEI, SHINTOHO EIGA
in co-operation with V-THEATER
Script: Fumio MORIYA
MUsic: Shinichi TANAKA
Camera: Masahide IIOKA
Cut: Shoji SAKAI
with Rinako HIRASAWA,
Mutsuo YOSHIOKA and Kyohei SATO
Director: Yuji TAJIRI
Get lost!
Yuichiro!
The guy, who came with you,
is he Haruka's new friend?
That's Hiroshi.
Hiroshi?
You're nevertheless dumb.
He's exactly like your husband.
As soon as he'll 've enough, he'll run away too.
Maybe.
- And you'll already be pissed off earlier.
Excuse me.
Yuichiro!
We're here!
Come to us!
Yeah, on him!
Go on!
Go on, on him!
Hi.
Hello!
Yeah, yeah!
- Go on!
Yeah, that's good. Go on!
Are they mating?
That's cricket sumo.
- Go on!
Ja, gut!
Yeah, attack him!
Right!
- Hold out!
Attack!
- Get going!
Why do crickets make sumo?
- They fight for the females.
Go on!
On him!
- Do it!
Further on!
- Yeah!
Leave your fingers of cricket sumo.
Taro made Haruka much grief with it.
Done, done!
Give the money.
You've done that good.
Hiroshi,
I've to go back to the post office.
Haruka,
what's that?
Yuichiro, eat now!
Yuichiro,
should we go to the river?
We let the crickets fight.
After I ate, OK?
The cucumber...
The cucumber...
Hey, Haruka!
Are you at home?
Haruka!
Hiroshi...
Hiroshi!
Anzai?
That's Anzai, right? Hey, Anzai!
Do you know how much crickets I bought from you?
Shit, open!
You pig!
You idiot!
Why should Anzai be here?
Who is it?
Go away.
Hey, you bastard. Come out!
Stop!
Did you sleep with him?
- As you can see.
Get lost.
- That's my apartment!
Get lost.
Yuichiro...
I'm his father!
- You're a parasite!
Haruka! - Go.
- I love you! - It's over!
That hurts! Haruka!
Do you know,
how much it costs to travel here!
Hey, Haruka!
Hey!
Yeah, attack!
Attack him, get going!
Yours is pretty strong.
Should I tell you something?
What?
- What you caught there
is a female.
Totally horny!
Females've a long tail.
And females don't fight.
Shit...
You should've told me!
That's enough.
Idiots!
KAWAHARA
Well, I think, that he's much nicer than Taro.
You sure?
And his tail stands obviously completely properly too.
Soon he has to confront Anzai.
Females don't fight.
But keep her nevertheless!
Mate her with good fighters.
They'll become much stronger then.
Meat! - But keep an eye on it
that they fit to each other.
Otherwise they bite the males
and finally eat them!
They eat them...
Here!
Oh, meat!
Fingers off!
- But hey! - Wait...
Hey! Damn...
It's hot!
Give me something too.
- No, it isn't applicable!
Bang, bang, bang!
Bang, bang!
ANZAI
It's hot!
- And if I
cut off a leg by mistake?
Cut off a leg by mistake?
I cut the tails of the females off
and sell them by mailorder.
They're large and look strong.
They can be sold expensively.
You're really bad.
Otherwise I couldn't make enough money
with crickets for a house.
I'm sorry.
Despite your divorce...
A credit is a credit.
Do you've contact?
Further on.
He's the boy's father.
How's your new lover?
We're understanding each other well.
After your divorce with Taro
I thought you would move to my place.
That's stupid!
Two failures like us should move together?
That's Yaotome, my fourth best.
Give him to Hiroshi.
If he defeats him, he can fight Yokozuna.
- Do it yourself.
I don't like insects.
Do you want another broken arm?
Let me...
Yeah... Go!
Yeah... Go!
Kanemoto, hurry! What's up?
Kanemoto, get him! On him! Hey!
What're you doing? Don't run away!
What're you doing? Kanemoto!
Shit!
His leg's torn off.
He becomes stronger every day.
Yoshida's on my rank list
still another Maegashira.
Takayama, my best,
has to diet.
For two weeks he'll get only water.
- Your Takayama'll die.
He won't die.
Yesterday he bit me.
He's strong enough for Anzai, eeh?
Who's Anzai?
An asshole .
He's the Yokozuna in this area.
Doesn't matter!
Don't! Wait! After the meal!
When we're hungry,
it's much more yummy.
- And Yuichiro?
Yuichiro!
Hiroshi!
Hello!
You're Hiroshi?
If you lose against him,
you'll get lost.
Hey, get going. Fight, fight!
TAKAYAMA
Takayama!
Isn't here.
- Do you believe, he'll come,
when you're calling?
With Takayama you cannot know that!
That's for sure.
Search more thoroughly!
Takayama! Hey!
Did you find him?
- No.
Start.
Nothing! Yoshida'll 've to fight.
Yoshida has no chance.
- Two weeks of diet for nothing!
Hey, what did you eat today?
Soba noodles with Tempura.
Tempura?
- Yeah, Tempura with Tara rungs.
What're you doing?
- Hold still!
Don't panic...
In this season there aren't any tare rungs!
The taste's similarly bitter.
I already ate one too.
This slut...
I frightened myself!
Did you meet Anzai?
Will you fight against him?
That is nevertheless only cricket sumo.
So you could win.
Yeah, if you hadn't fried my Takayama!
You could at least...
've said it to me before the meal!
- His time was over.
What?
He jumped out of free will in the Oil.
And you simply just watched?
- I felt sorry for him,
so I dipped him into paste and
fried him once more.
You...
Hey, stop it!
No wonder he was still crispy the next day.
But that's not the point!
Idiot!
Don't!
You Idiot! What're you doing?
Stop it!
Idiot!
Did you sleep...
with Anzai?
Just once.
And at that time I loved him!
Can you defeat him?
I'll win.
- And with which cricket?
I'll look out for one.
Go to Taro.
He has some strong ones.
"Excuse,
that I was born.
Excuse,
that I wasn't prepared for this the life",
the man cried alone for himself.
What's up?
Kuniko!
Is your mom well?
You've to pay the money back,
I should tell you.
Oh yeah?
Hey!
Can I be...
Can I shortly be alone with him?
Well, it starts!
They're missing each other.
I'm still jealous.
I thought a woman would come.
I was angry for nothing.
Don't look in such way!
Hiroshi!
What're you doing?
I got something in my eye!
Oh, it broke off...
Good, go there. There!
It starts. The fight begins...
Get going!
I've lost!
Once more. Let's start.
The fight begins...
Is this Haruka's smell?
Don't you feel lonely?
Won't you marry Haruka?
I don't know!
You can cum inside in me.
Let's marry, Hiroshi!
I want always be together with you!
A cricket!
Wait, wait!
Wait...
Damn...
You pig!
I'll show you, damn...
Wait! Don't, don't...
Stop it!
Yuichiro!
Hiroshi, I'll shortly go to them.
But don't remain too long.
What is?
Here!
Do you like sex?
Yes.
And otherwise? What pleases you too?
Go!
Stop, Anzai!
Oh my god...
You'll never see him again.
I know.
He's exactly like the other one.
And if you'll move to Anzai?
Are you kidding? - And Yuichiro?
Where should he go during the day?
You won't find any here.
Go early in the morning or in the evening
with your mom to the cemetery.
There're lotsa strong ones.
Did you understand?
Why did dad and Hiroshi argue?
Because they're both stupid.
It isn't your fault, mom.
Yuichiro!
- Yes?
You're getting a brother.
One, two...
What did you say?
- It's true!
Really!
Take some of these too.
- Does it taste good!
Hey, what're you doing?
Here's still some vegetable.
Cauliflower, cauliflower!
- The meat's ready.
Yep!
Bring more beer.
- OK!
You don't eat anything?
Is it yummy!
- Very yummy.
Do what you want.
But at my place is always someone
in the house during the day.
It doesn't make a difference
if Yuichiro is here.
What'll you do?
Perhaps he'll return,
if you'll wait longer.
Hiroshi!
Haruka!
- What're you doing there?
I dug a tunnel under the river.
I cannot swim.
What's that? - Flared out
and horny cricket females.
They'll rape the males.
Release them.
How clever. - See you.
- Wait!
Come back.
Yuichiro's missing you.
Let's live together again.
If I'm discovered I'll be in trouble.
We meet on the other river bank.
Yuichiro!
The females have long tails.
If you'll see one, slam it!
Yuichiro, look!
Hiroshi dug this tunnel.
KAWAHARA
Hey, what kind of photo's that?
What should we do? We don't know
who he is and from where he comes.
Tell me, where's Haruka gone?
Right...
Hard to bear it inside there, what?
Are you pregnant?
But you cannot see anything yet.
Can I touch?
- Sure.
I would've married him
if I'd known that.
Did you sleep with Hiroshi?
Did the earth tremble?
Do you like Hiroshi gladly?
And you met him only once.
Let me join you!
Did you hear that?
KAWAHARA
TOMB FOR HIROSHI HIRATSUKA
Who're you?
I'm in Japan... Good luck!
Good luck!
Mom, there comes a ship.
Hey, it's...
It's Hiroshi...
- It's Hiroshi. Hiroshi!
Hiroshi!
Hiroshi, you were at the sea?
What did you do?
What a welcome! Who're you?
Just a parasite.
Hiroshi, the parasite?
another entertaining Nippon candy!!!
Aren't we in Kawahara yet?
There's also someone running!
Stop!
Help us please!
Since when did you peep at us?
You spied on us.
You threw down the crickets intentionally.
Since when did you watch?
Yuichiro, that's dangerous!
Not really.
Let's kiss!
Can't you wait till we're at my place?
You're having a man for sure.
A man?
Yeah, a man.
His father.
And when would it be?
What's that?
A Djemb.
What's a Djemb?
- A drum.
Drum a little for me!
Can't you wait till we're at my place?
Yuichiro!
See you soon.
See you soon, Hiroshi.
THE STRANGE SAGA OF HIROSHI,
THE FREELOADING SEX MACHINE
Production: KOKUEI, SHINTOHO EIGA
in co-operation with V-THEATER
Script: Fumio MORIYA
MUsic: Shinichi TANAKA
Camera: Masahide IIOKA
Cut: Shoji SAKAI
with Rinako HIRASAWA,
Mutsuo YOSHIOKA and Kyohei SATO
Director: Yuji TAJIRI
Get lost!
Yuichiro!
The guy, who came with you,
is he Haruka's new friend?
That's Hiroshi.
Hiroshi?
You're nevertheless dumb.
He's exactly like your husband.
As soon as he'll 've enough, he'll run away too.
Maybe.
- And you'll already be pissed off earlier.
Excuse me.
Yuichiro!
We're here!
Come to us!
Yeah, on him!
Go on!
Go on, on him!
Hi.
Hello!
Yeah, yeah!
- Go on!
Yeah, that's good. Go on!
Are they mating?
That's cricket sumo.
- Go on!
Ja, gut!
Yeah, attack him!
Right!
- Hold out!
Attack!
- Get going!
Why do crickets make sumo?
- They fight for the females.
Go on!
On him!
- Do it!
Further on!
- Yeah!
Leave your fingers of cricket sumo.
Taro made Haruka much grief with it.
Done, done!
Give the money.
You've done that good.
Hiroshi,
I've to go back to the post office.
Haruka,
what's that?
Yuichiro, eat now!
Yuichiro,
should we go to the river?
We let the crickets fight.
After I ate, OK?
The cucumber...
The cucumber...
Hey, Haruka!
Are you at home?
Haruka!
Hiroshi...
Hiroshi!
Anzai?
That's Anzai, right? Hey, Anzai!
Do you know how much crickets I bought from you?
Shit, open!
You pig!
You idiot!
Why should Anzai be here?
Who is it?
Go away.
Hey, you bastard. Come out!
Stop!
Did you sleep with him?
- As you can see.
Get lost.
- That's my apartment!
Get lost.
Yuichiro...
I'm his father!
- You're a parasite!
Haruka! - Go.
- I love you! - It's over!
That hurts! Haruka!
Do you know,
how much it costs to travel here!
Hey, Haruka!
Hey!
Yeah, attack!
Attack him, get going!
Yours is pretty strong.
Should I tell you something?
What?
- What you caught there
is a female.
Totally horny!
Females've a long tail.
And females don't fight.
Shit...
You should've told me!
That's enough.
Idiots!
KAWAHARA
Well, I think, that he's much nicer than Taro.
You sure?
And his tail stands obviously completely properly too.
Soon he has to confront Anzai.
Females don't fight.
But keep her nevertheless!
Mate her with good fighters.
They'll become much stronger then.
Meat! - But keep an eye on it
that they fit to each other.
Otherwise they bite the males
and finally eat them!
They eat them...
Here!
Oh, meat!
Fingers off!
- But hey! - Wait...
Hey! Damn...
It's hot!
Give me something too.
- No, it isn't applicable!
Bang, bang, bang!
Bang, bang!
ANZAI
It's hot!
- And if I
cut off a leg by mistake?
Cut off a leg by mistake?
I cut the tails of the females off
and sell them by mailorder.
They're large and look strong.
They can be sold expensively.
You're really bad.
Otherwise I couldn't make enough money
with crickets for a house.
I'm sorry.
Despite your divorce...
A credit is a credit.
Do you've contact?
Further on.
He's the boy's father.
How's your new lover?
We're understanding each other well.
After your divorce with Taro
I thought you would move to my place.
That's stupid!
Two failures like us should move together?
That's Yaotome, my fourth best.
Give him to Hiroshi.
If he defeats him, he can fight Yokozuna.
- Do it yourself.
I don't like insects.
Do you want another broken arm?
Let me...
Yeah... Go!
Yeah... Go!
Kanemoto, hurry! What's up?
Kanemoto, get him! On him! Hey!
What're you doing? Don't run away!
What're you doing? Kanemoto!
Shit!
His leg's torn off.
He becomes stronger every day.
Yoshida's on my rank list
still another Maegashira.
Takayama, my best,
has to diet.
For two weeks he'll get only water.
- Your Takayama'll die.
He won't die.
Yesterday he bit me.
He's strong enough for Anzai, eeh?
Who's Anzai?
An asshole .
He's the Yokozuna in this area.
Doesn't matter!
Don't! Wait! After the meal!
When we're hungry,
it's much more yummy.
- And Yuichiro?
Yuichiro!
Hiroshi!
Hello!
You're Hiroshi?
If you lose against him,
you'll get lost.
Hey, get going. Fight, fight!
TAKAYAMA
Takayama!
Isn't here.
- Do you believe, he'll come,
when you're calling?
With Takayama you cannot know that!
That's for sure.
Search more thoroughly!
Takayama! Hey!
Did you find him?
- No.
Start.
Nothing! Yoshida'll 've to fight.
Yoshida has no chance.
- Two weeks of diet for nothing!
Hey, what did you eat today?
Soba noodles with Tempura.
Tempura?
- Yeah, Tempura with Tara rungs.
What're you doing?
- Hold still!
Don't panic...
In this season there aren't any tare rungs!
The taste's similarly bitter.
I already ate one too.
This slut...
I frightened myself!
Did you meet Anzai?
Will you fight against him?
That is nevertheless only cricket sumo.
So you could win.
Yeah, if you hadn't fried my Takayama!
You could at least...
've said it to me before the meal!
- His time was over.
What?
He jumped out of free will in the Oil.
And you simply just watched?
- I felt sorry for him,
so I dipped him into paste and
fried him once more.
You...
Hey, stop it!
No wonder he was still crispy the next day.
But that's not the point!
Idiot!
Don't!
You Idiot! What're you doing?
Stop it!
Idiot!
Did you sleep...
with Anzai?
Just once.
And at that time I loved him!
Can you defeat him?
I'll win.
- And with which cricket?
I'll look out for one.
Go to Taro.
He has some strong ones.
"Excuse,
that I was born.
Excuse,
that I wasn't prepared for this the life",
the man cried alone for himself.
What's up?
Kuniko!
Is your mom well?
You've to pay the money back,
I should tell you.
Oh yeah?
Hey!
Can I be...
Can I shortly be alone with him?
Well, it starts!
They're missing each other.
I'm still jealous.
I thought a woman would come.
I was angry for nothing.
Don't look in such way!
Hiroshi!
What're you doing?
I got something in my eye!
Oh, it broke off...
Good, go there. There!
It starts. The fight begins...
Get going!
I've lost!
Once more. Let's start.
The fight begins...
Is this Haruka's smell?
Don't you feel lonely?
Won't you marry Haruka?
I don't know!
You can cum inside in me.
Let's marry, Hiroshi!
I want always be together with you!
A cricket!
Wait, wait!
Wait...
Damn...
You pig!
I'll show you, damn...
Wait! Don't, don't...
Stop it!
Yuichiro!
Hiroshi, I'll shortly go to them.
But don't remain too long.
What is?
Here!
Do you like sex?
Yes.
And otherwise? What pleases you too?
Go!
Stop, Anzai!
Oh my god...
You'll never see him again.
I know.
He's exactly like the other one.
And if you'll move to Anzai?
Are you kidding? - And Yuichiro?
Where should he go during the day?
You won't find any here.
Go early in the morning or in the evening
with your mom to the cemetery.
There're lotsa strong ones.
Did you understand?
Why did dad and Hiroshi argue?
Because they're both stupid.
It isn't your fault, mom.
Yuichiro!
- Yes?
You're getting a brother.
One, two...
What did you say?
- It's true!
Really!
Take some of these too.
- Does it taste good!
Hey, what're you doing?
Here's still some vegetable.
Cauliflower, cauliflower!
- The meat's ready.
Yep!
Bring more beer.
- OK!
You don't eat anything?
Is it yummy!
- Very yummy.
Do what you want.
But at my place is always someone
in the house during the day.
It doesn't make a difference
if Yuichiro is here.
What'll you do?
Perhaps he'll return,
if you'll wait longer.
Hiroshi!
Haruka!
- What're you doing there?
I dug a tunnel under the river.
I cannot swim.
What's that? - Flared out
and horny cricket females.
They'll rape the males.
Release them.
How clever. - See you.
- Wait!
Come back.
Yuichiro's missing you.
Let's live together again.
If I'm discovered I'll be in trouble.
We meet on the other river bank.
Yuichiro!
The females have long tails.
If you'll see one, slam it!
Yuichiro, look!
Hiroshi dug this tunnel.
KAWAHARA
Hey, what kind of photo's that?
What should we do? We don't know
who he is and from where he comes.
Tell me, where's Haruka gone?
Right...
Hard to bear it inside there, what?
Are you pregnant?
But you cannot see anything yet.
Can I touch?
- Sure.
I would've married him
if I'd known that.
Did you sleep with Hiroshi?
Did the earth tremble?
Do you like Hiroshi gladly?
And you met him only once.
Let me join you!
Did you hear that?
KAWAHARA
TOMB FOR HIROSHI HIRATSUKA
Who're you?
I'm in Japan... Good luck!
Good luck!
Mom, there comes a ship.
Hey, it's...
It's Hiroshi...
- It's Hiroshi. Hiroshi!
Hiroshi!
Hiroshi, you were at the sea?
What did you do?
What a welcome! Who're you?
Just a parasite.
Hiroshi, the parasite?