Hit The Ice (1943) Movie Script

All right, nurse.
Doc, I feel terrible.
This is the worst
I've felt all week.
Now, just relax,
Mr. Fellowsby.
Quite frankly
your case baffles us,
but this next series of tests
should explain your high fever.
I'll drop in
and see you later.
Thank you, Doctor.
Dr. Burns.
Yes, nurse?
I don't think there's anything wrong
with that man. I think he's faking!
I'm sure your diagnosis
is based on something
as scientific as, say,
a woman's intuition.
But a little while ago
his temperature was normal,
and when I told him so,
he actually got angry.
- What's your name, nurse?
- Peggy Osborne.
- New here?
- Yes, sir, but...
You know it's against all rules
to tell a patient his temperature.
Yes, sir.
That nurse is
getting suspicious.
Why can't we knock
that bank over now?
Why not, Boss?
It's laying right
across the street.
I could reach out this window
and grab a handful of small change.
Jump into your duds,
we'll hop over there,
do the deed, and you'll be
back in bed in 10 minutes.
It's a perfect alibi...
just like you figured.
Look, we don't move
out of here
until the boys
from Detroit arrive.
Why do we need a couple
of outside mugs?
Listen, will you leave
the brain work to me?
I've never seen
these boys from Detroit,
but they tell me they handle
a gun like it was a blonde.
Yeah, but how are we
gonna know these guys?
They're gonna give me the password.
They're gonna say,
"Is the doctor here?"
Give me a couple of those pills
that give me the fever, will you?
I'm beginning to cool off.
There you are, my friend.
Just place a quarter
and your address in an envelope
and we'll mail
your picture to you.
There you are.
Just mail us 25 cents.
Weokie!
Weokie!
Where did you
learn that call?
Same place you did.
18th Street.
Hey, you're
not Bill Burns,
who was the dumbest kid
on our street?
The very same,
only it's Dr. William Burns now.
Gee, I'm glad
to see you, Flash.
Am I glad to see you.
I've got Little Tubby with me.
- You remember Little Tubby?
- Sure.
He's around here someplace.
Tubby, oh Tub...
He must be down this way.
Oh, Tub!
Tubby!
He's around here someplace.
Look out for these things.
Tubby! Tub...
- Somebody call me?
- What are you doing in there?
Well, I needed a darkroom
to reload my camera.
Well, why pick out
a trash can?
I don't have to pay
any rent here.
Never mind that.
Get out of here.
Hey, wait a minute.
Wait a minute.
I don't want to be helped
by strangers. Who's him?
That's your old pal, Burns.
Don't you remember, Burns the kid?
- Bill Burns?
- Bill Burns.
Bill, I'm glad to see you.
How have you been?
Get me out.
I want to talk to you. Come on.
Fire engines.
Fire engines.
What's he
so excited about?
An editor promised us a job on a
newspaper if we could get him a scoop.
Yeah, maybe we could shoot
some pictures of the fire.
I might be able to help you.
Come with me.
- Going to the fire, Mack?
- Yes, Doctor.
Hop in, boys,
this may be your break.
- Where's the fire?
- In your eye.
Oooh!
Whoo! Whoo!
Oh, you clumsy...
whew.
Tubby, you haven't changed.
You're still getting into trouble.
Say, Bill, I wonder what the rest
of the gang are doing nowadays.
You remember Johnny Long?
You mean the kid that
always played the fiddle?
Yeah, he's got a swing band
up at Sun Valley.
Got me the job
as resident physician up there.
You hear that?
Everybody's going places but us.
We'll get rolling.
Whoa!
Now I know what they mean
by share the ride.
Hey, what have you got,
A or B coupon?
Keep quiet.
You've got to kick in
with an A or B.
- Quiet!
- Give me something!
Hey, you'll have
to get off now.
I've got to get a retread.
Come on, hurry up!
Look at that fire!
Come on, get the cameras!
Oh boy!
Oooh!
Here, Tubby.
Here's your camera.
You didn't get hurt,
did you?
- No.
- Thattaboy! Me neither.
Get those ladders working!
Quick now!
Hey, Chiefie!
Hey, Chief!
Hi, Chiefie!
Look at the camera
and see the little birdie!
A cute little one!
Watch!
Now, watch
the little birdie!
Hey! Stand still,
will ya?
The chief turned
into a tree.
Now somebody put a ladder
in front of me.
Get the ladder
out of there, will you?
Oh, boy!
What a fog! Whooo!
I'll never be able
to drive home in that!
Boy, these people
look small.
I'll have to change
the lens.
Hiya!
- If he falls, he'll break his neck.
- What are we going to do?
Chief, get that ladder down
before he's killed!
Flash: Bring him down! Hold it, Tubby!
Bring him down!
Bring him down!
Flash! Flash!
Hold it, Tubby.
Flash!
- Flash!
- Swell!
Now turn around so I can get
your face in the picture!
I got it!
Oh, it's hot!
I can't hang on
any longer!
Here I come!
Whoo!
Whoo!
Tubby! Tubby!
Are you all right?
Weokie!
Tubby! Oh, Doc! Doc! Oh, Doc!
We'll have to take x-rays. Take him
down the hall while I make a report.
Oh, I forgot her chart.
Oh, oh.
- What happened?
- You've just had a baby.
A baby?
A boy or a girl?
A boy.
A boy?
- Does it look like me?
- Exactly like you.
Cute little fellow.
I'm so lucky!
What!
A baby?!
It's a man!
Hey, Flash!
Never mind.
No you don't! No you don't! No you don't!
I've been looking all over
for you. Where've you been?
Having a baby.
Having a baby?
Yeah. Come on,
let's get out of here.
Wait a minute. We can't.
We've gotta find Bill.
You gotta have
x-rays taken.
X-rays?
"Surgeonly. "
If they come out good,
can I have a dozen of them?
- Oh, stop! Let's look in here.
- The first one.
Yeah, we'll start here.
- Open it up. Go ahead!
- Pardon us.
Excuse us, please.
You boys looking
for somebody?
Is the doc here?
Well, it's about time
you boys got here.
Where you guys been?
- Working.
- Doing what?
Shooting people.
Perfect day for it.
You mean you've already
shot somebody today?
We've got to make
a living, haven't we?
How'd you do it?
He just sticks 'em up
against the wall and shoots 'em.
Yeah, at the prices we charge
we can't be fussy.
Say, were you in
on the deal?
No, I was shooting a cop
down on the corner.
Hey, what do you charge
for shooting cops?
Cops?
Free.
We make it free for the cops
because when we're shooting
other people, they never bother us.
Now let's get
this clear, boys.
With me, you've got to keep
the shooting down to a minimum.
The important thing is to stand
outside that bank across the street
and cover us
when we come out.
You want us to cover you
when you come out?
That's right. You boys are clear on
what you're supposed to get for this job?
Well, we charge everybody
the same... 25.
25?
Hey, that's a little steep,
isn't it?
Well, how do you
figure that?
Lots of times
people come at us so fast
that we shoot the back of their
heads. We don't get nothing for that.
- Getting them in the back of the head don't count?
- Oh, no.
And if we don't do a good job
for you, we won't charge you.
- What time?
- Just when the bank's about to close.
Very, very good.
That gives me time to shoot a couple
of other people first.
Thanks a lot.
Those guys better hurry up.
The bank will be closed.
I know it.
Here they come now!
Okay, get ready.
Get out of the way.
I want to make a picture.
Hey, what's the idea
of them cameras?
Hide the guns.
Hey, do you want it
goin' in or comin' out?
- Comin' out.
- Comin' out.
He got well fast, didn't he? They must
be awfully pleased over at the hospital.
Never mind that.
Get your camera ready.
Mr. Fellowsby.
Click, click, click, we'll
get the whole three of them.
You're not getting paid
to do that!
Oh, I thought I'd pick up
a little on the side.
Let's get this picture.
Come on!
- Hold it!
- Cover our getaway!
- Hold it!
- Got it! Got it! Got it!
Oh, boy!
That's a boy!
What's the matter?
Hey, everybody!
It's after 3:00.
Do you want this door open?
Wait a minute!
Where is everybody?
This is a fine way
to do business!
Somebody might come in
and rob the joint.
Yeah, let's find out.
What is this?
- Teller!
- Tell who?
- Teller!
- I'll tell 'er. Where is she?
Where is who?
I said teller!
- Tell 'er what?
- Tell 'er nothing.
- I want a teller.
- Go ahead and tell 'er. I don't care.
- No! Teller in a bank!
- Tell 'er in a bank. Tell 'er outside.
Tell her any place you want!
I won't listen.
When I say "teller,"
I don't mean "tell 'er. "
- Well, what do you mean?
- Teller.
- Teller.
- Now you've got it.
Now I've got it! I don't even
know what I'm talking about.
Oh, come on!
Will you get out of the way?
- Don't hit my camera.
- Come on, let's look around here.
There must be
someone here.
Don't get so rough.
Yoo hoo!
Hmm.
Hey, Flash!
Get the size
of the big icebox!
Whooo!
Anybody in there?
Only a couple of guys
with a toothache.
How do you know
they've got a toothache?
They've got plaster
over their mouths.
- The bank's stuck up.
- What's this bank got to be stuck up about?
- It's no better than any other bank.
- It's been robbed.
- That's against the law.
- Certainly it is.
If we're caught in here,
they'll blame us for the stickup.
We've got to go out
and call a cop.
- We don't have to.
- Get rid of the cameras!
- Oh.
- Hurry up!
Did you know
your front door was open?
Somebody might come in
you don't want in here.
That's what I thought
when I saw you.
Shh! Quiet!
You fellows
must be new around here.
- Where's Robinson?
- What's he do?
- Teller in the bank.
- Tell'er in the bank?!
Listen, I don't know what girl
you guys are talking about.
- Don't you give me the same thing about a girl.
- No, no.
Where's the rest of the fellows
who work here?
- Huh?
- Where are the rest of the fellows that work here?
- The other two guys. They're in the icebox.
- No!
They're tied up
right now.
You fellows are busy. There's no
sense of me holding up the bank.
No, it's been held up
once already.
- What?!
- I say, "In case it gets held up, we're ready. "
Oh, good!
I'll lock up for you.
- Ain't he got a nice smile?
- Can you imagine that?
He's a nice-looking cop.
- He's got us locked in.
- Let's find out.
Hi-ho on the port side!
You landlubbers,
down with that mast! Yo!
Must be for a small boat,
this here one.
Uh-oh. It must work
by electricity.
See if you can
find a button.
Hello.
Bank's closed!
Persistent, huh?
Bank's closed!
Hello!
- Hello! Hello!
- No, that's the burglar alarm.
- The burglar alarm?
- Turn it off!
Hey, turn it off! Turn off the
burglar alarm, will you, please?
The cops!
Come on!
- Don't forget the cameras!
- Right.
Come on.
Turn off that alarm!
Ouch!
- Oh.
- What's the matter with him?
He was hurt in the holdup. I've gotta
take him across the street to the hospital.
Go ahead. Murphy, go along
with them and get the story.
I was shot.
Some guy stabbed me.
All right, just have patience.
Have patience.
Why you... hey, you,
come back here!
Hold it! Hold it!
Hold it!
Thank you!
So I went in. Pillows were stuffed in
the bed to fool us and they were gone.
Ridiculous. A man with a fever
as high as Fellowsby's
wouldn't dare to go out.
We'll see.
Anything wrong, Doctor?
No, not a thing,
is there, nurse?
They weren't in this room
a little while ago.
No? Well, that's
news to me.
If you find out where I was,
would you let me know?
- I can't understand it.
- That'll be all, Miss Osborne.
Yes, Doctor.
I hope this
hasn't upset you.
Oh, no,
not nearly as much
as that racket outside,
Doctor.
Say, Doctor,
how about taking me up
to that Sun Valley place
you told me about?
Yeah, you're going to be
the new doc up there,
so you can stay
right on the case.
Hmm, I admit it would
be more restful.
You know, I'm still
a very sick man, Doctor.
I can't take all that
noise outside. I get so...
Just you relax and I'll
take care of everything.
That nurse almost
messed us up good.
Yeah. Look, I'll tell you
how we handle this.
Doc's ambulance gets us
out of this hot spot
and then we hire the little lady
as the nurse in the case.
- That handles everything.
- What a set-up!
Sick in a hospital,
with witnesses!
Tubby:
How do you like that?
The teller telled on us...
the dirty stool-pigeon!
Flash: No, you dope! We're
victims of circumstantial evidence!
We've got to catch those crooks
before the cops catch us!
It ain't gonna
do us no good!
They've got our pictures in
the paper! Nobody'll believe us!
- Wait a minute!
- There that guy made a very fat puss outta me!
Shh. Picture! Why didn't
I think of that before?
We've got a picture
of those three crooks!
Don't you remember the one
you took outside the bank?
- Think hard!
- Oh.
How're you coming along
with the picture?
Tubby:
I just finished it.
Hey! This ought to catch
those crooks red-handed!
- Thattaboy!
- Get a load of this!
Hey! I didn't know that you
was one of the bank robbers!
Stop that!
Now we've got
to get out of town!
- Let's get packed.
- Okay.
Get with it!
Here was our chance!
All the evidence in the world
we had, and what happens?
He lets everything...
why, you...
Oooh! Oooh!
Come on,
get out of there!
And get that grip!
Come on!
- What did we have, a blackout?
- Never mind that!
- Come on, pack that grip!
- Okay, okay.
Get with it!
After all, why should I
take the chance of going to jail?
Why should get
myself a record?
We've got to blow this town!
On second thought,
why should we run away?
We're not guilty!
Come here, wait a minute!
Hold that!
Unpack that grip!
Unpack the grip!
Run away...
like criminals in the dark!
What for?
We've done no harm.
We've harmed no one.
All our lives
we've lived a clean,
innocent life.
Why should I be
afraid of cops?
Who are we to run away
from the police?
Why should we
fear the police?
Why should we fear 'em?
We got nothing to fear!
That's right.
But on second thought,
if they came in right now,
you know what would happen?
They'd take us to jail!
Pack that grip!
Pack that grip!
Hurry up before
they get in here!
Pack that grip.
That's fine. Hiding away
like thieves in the dark.
For what reason?
For what reason
I ask you?
Why should the police
be after us?
- Why you asking me? I don't know.
- Quiet! Pack the grip.
Nice goings on!
Like criminals
hiding away here.
Then again,
wait a minute!
Why can't we take this
to court and fight this out?
Unpack that grip.
Unpack the grip!
Why sneak away?
Let's take it to court!
You're willing to go
to court, aren't you?
Well, I am.
I've got people to think of.
I'll take it to court.
I'll take it to the highest
courts in the country!
That's what I'll do!
Let's see, where will
I take this?
I'll fight them! Why should
I be afraid of the cops?
But wait a minute!
That requires money.
We have no money.
Mm-hmm, that's
food for thought.
Yeah, we can't.
We gotta get out!
We've gotta get
away from here!
I don't know where we're going
but we've gotta sneak out...
like cowards... cowards!
Wait a minute!
We're not cowards!
Why should we be cowards?
What have we done?
What have we done
to be ashamed off?
Nothing!
Certainly not!
I should say not!
We've done nothing!
But can we prove it?
We can't prove it!
That's the whole trouble. That's
the whole trouble in a nutshell!
But wait a minute!
We've gotta prove it!
We've gotta prove it!
We can't sneak out like this!
We can't sneak out! Think of our
families. Think of our families.
But you can't tell them!
You can't convince them of that!
Pack that grip!
We go to jail
and we don't go to jail!
I pack and then I unpack!
Why don't you
make up your mind?!
- Then on the other hand...
- No!
Ow!
You! Tubby!
Tubby!
Did you hear
anything, dear?
No, I didn't
hear anything.
You'll have to put
the lights out.
I can't sleep
with them on.
- All right.
- Thank you.
Huh?
- Here you are, sir.
- Thank you.
All right, nurse.
I'll take charge of him now.
Doctor, Miss Osborne's
coming with us.
All right, Buster.
Track 23.
Watch yourself!
Now listen, Tubby,
we've got to follow those crooks
and prove they robbed the bank.
- I don't mind following them. Only one thing bothers me.
- What's that?
- We might catch up to 'em.
- A cop! Duck! Duck!
Hurry up.
Get up.
Get something to carry, so
we won't look conspicuous.
Come here.
I'll carry you.
Never mind me!
Get ahold of something.
Go ahead,
get ahold of something.
Hey, can I carry
your tennis rackets?
Tennis rackets?
Don't you know a fly-swatter
when you see one?
All right. I only asked you
a sensible question.
May I carry your bag?
Now wouldn't you look sort of silly
carrying that bag?
It doesn't match
my ensemble.
Thanks just the same.
What's the matter
with you?
There goes the girl
I've been in love with all my life.
In love?
Do you know that girl?
Did you ever meet her?
Are you going crazy?
You must be!
Let's find out how
to get on this train.
Come on, come on.
Don't stand in a daze!
Will you wake up?!
Wake up! Wake up!
- Excuse me.
- It's all right.
All right, stop it.
Don't get silly.
Not me!
There's our chance!
First trombone.
- First sax.
- Second sax.
- First bass.
- Second bass.
- Third bass.
- Shortstop.
- "Shortstop. "
- First trumpet.
- "First trumpet. "
- Second...
Shortstop?
Hey, shortstop!
You hear me
singing psalms
About your
subtle charms
I'd give the world itself
To win them
My place is
in your arms
My arms are out of place
Whenever you're
not in them
I'm like a fish
out of water...
A sky with no star...
A glamorous Heddy...
Without the LaMarr...
I'd like
to murder the guy
Who put the headache
in my horoscope
I'm just a dilly, that's all
The little lady they call
Arabella the dope
I'm like the picture
by Disney...
Minus the mice
A shrimp a la creole...
Without any rice...
Although I love a fire
How I tire
Answering false alarms
Like a fish out of water
Who certainly ought to be
in your arms
I'm like a fish
that's out of water
Oysters
in the month of June
A serenade by Cole Porter
Without any tune
The little things
that you say
The corny jokes
that you play
Gee, but they're getting me down,
but down
Men: I'm walking round in
a stew, an individual who
All: Can't help acting the clown, rah-da
Like a fish out of water
Doo, doo day
A cat without kits
Doo, doo day
Or even DiMaggio
without any hits
The well-known misfit
Just as apropos
as Gypsy Rose Lee
Down at the old
schoolmarm's
Like a fish out of water
Doo dee
- A nautical daughter
- Doo dee
A fish out of water
All: Who certainly ought to be in...
Be in your arms.
Oh, Tubby!
Hey, Weokie!
- Johnny Long!
- Flash!
- How are you? Tubby.
- Good to see you.
Well, this is
a surprise.
Are you boys going
up to Sun Valley, too?
Yes. Say could you get us
a job up there?
Well, the hotel manager
is a friend of mine.
Maybe I can do
some good for you.
- That'll be swell.
- Tickets!
Excuse me, boys.
Tickets.
FBI, Washington.
COD, Alcatraz.
I'm sorry, young fellow.
I hate to see anyone handcuffed.
Yeah, well, that's okay.
Thanks a lot.
Now see here,
you can't do that on this train.
I can't see! I can't see!
I can't see! I can't see!
Now what are we
gonna do?
We've gotta get tickets
or we'll be thrown off this train.
- You want tickets?
- Yes. Why?
Get this.
Tickets, please.
Man: Just a minute, conductor.
Thank you.
Hey, three of them.
Now we even got one
for an extra party!
Wrong party!
Flash:
All right, all right!
- What's the trouble?
- Them monkeys from Detroit.
- I don't want to lose them.
- You're not gonna let them get away?
Relax, you couldn't lose them
if you wanted to.
Come on inside.
Marcia!
Harry, what are you
doing here?
I was just going to ask you
the same question.
- Come on inside.
- Oh well...
It's been a long time
since Club 77, hasn't it, Harry?
- That's right.
- Those fellows may get away
if you don't go
right after them.
I told you to relax, didn't I?
I left an unsigned note
telling them where we were going.
They think they're following us.
Are you in trouble, Harry?
Yeah.
Look, Marcia,
how'd you like to help
the fellow that gave you
your first break?
I'd be glad to do anything
I can for you,
but I'm on my way to Sun
Valley to sing with the band.
That's wonderful!
We'll all be up there together.
Would you
give me a hand?
Sure... if it's on
the up and up.
That's swell. I'll tell you
all about it at Sun Valley.
Right now the boys are bothering
me about some unfinished business.
- See you later, eh?
- See you later.
Say, where does
the dame come in?
She comes in
so the Detroit boys can go out.
She's bait to bring 'em
out in the open
where we can knock 'em off
with a minimum of vice versa.
- Nobody in here.
- They must have doubled back on us.
All right, hold it!
There you are.
Come on, give me your hand.
Give me your hand.
Get up.
Come on.
Come on.
Come on, get in.
Ohh!
Give me you hand.
Get in here.
- Come on. Ohh!
- My head!
Hold the window.
Come here, hold the window.
Hold the window.
Hold the window.
Hold the window.
There you are.
- Now that's easy enough. Now, come on in.
- Flash!
Ohh!
A poet said
"I'll never see
A poem lovely as a tree"
But I would change
this version to...
"A song as lovely, dear,
as you"
While bright stars
light you up tonight
I think I'll write you
up tonight
I won't need steel guitars...
Just a verse and 32 bars
Ahhh
I'd like to set you
to music
Ahhh
Immortalize you
in music
I'd like to borrow
The lilt of April's breeze
And then reprise you
In these melodies
Ahh
And when I finish
the music
Oooh, hooo hooo
You'll hear the sweet
orchestration
Of the birds...
I'd like to set you
to music
Just because
You're far,
far too wonderful
For words
- La da, da da
- Ooh ooh
La da, da da
La da, da da
La dee, da da
But there's no one
lovelier than you
Man: I'd like to set you to music
Immortalize
you in music
I'd like to borrow
The lilt of April's breeze
And then reprise you
In these melodies...
And when I finish
the music
La da dee,
da da da da dum
You'll hear
the sweet orchestration
Of the birds
I'd like to set you to music
Just because
You're far
Far too wonderful
Far too marvelous...
For words
La da, la da
La da, da da.
- Waiter!
- Yes, sir?
- Same thing, please.
- What'll you have?
A... what's the matter
with you?
Why aren't you
waiting on the tables?
I can't.
Why not?
I'm in love.
But she likes
Johnny Long.
I know that.
If I was a musician,
I'd have a much better
chance with her.
- But you're not.
- I know that, too. I'm a big dummy.
I never took lessons
with nothing.
- You can't play any instruments?
- I can't play nothing.
Hey, wait a minute!
I've got an idea.
Do you know
what's in there?
- There's a Victrola in there.
- A Victrola?
- What are you going to do with that?
- With a piano record.
I was supposed to take it
on the other side of the pool.
- Why don't you go and take it over there?
- Wait a minute.
I'm going to take this thing
in back of the piano.
You're gonna take the Victrola
in back of the piano?
Go over and ask her if she
wants you to play the piano.
- If she says yes, I'm stuck, huh?
- You're not stuck!
You go over to the piano
and you say, "All right. "
When you say, "All right,"
I'll put on the record.
She'll think you're playing.
Then, when you say "All
right" the second time, I stop.
Oh, we're gonna
flimflam her?
- No!
- Let's have one rehearsal.
Go ahead.
All right.
- All right.
- Stop.
- Come on.
- Come on.
Hello!
Hello.
- How are you?
- Fine. How are you?
I... do you
like musicians?
Why, I love them.
You do?
I play piano.
I didn't know you could
play the piano.
Do you play by ear?
No, I use my hands
like everybody else.
They hurt
when I play that way.
Oh, I see.
Like that. Would you like to
have me play something for you?
Sure.
Come on.
Do you mind
sitting over here?
- Not at all.
- Thank you.
You sit right down there and I'll
play something on the piano for you
like you never heard in your life.
Beautiful, too.
Excuse me.
All right!
Good, right?
All right.
- How did you like it?
- Say, that was all right.
All right!
It's only when I say,
"All right. "
All right!
Not now,
you dummy!
- Well?
- Say, that was fine!
But why do you keep
saying, "All right"?
All right!
- Say, that was all...
- Don't say it!
- Well, that was fine.
- That's better.
I thought you were going
to say it was all right.
All right!
Anything else you'd
like to have me play?
How about "Prelude
in C-Sharp Minor" by Rachmaninoff?
Rachmaninoff?
Right.
That ain't the guy that used to play
third base for the Yankees, is it?
No, I guess not.
Rachmaninoff!
All right!
All right!
Well, I'm waiting.
So am I.
All right.
Come on!
I'm not in the mood yet.
All right!
All right!
That's better.
Good, huh?
One hand.
No hands.
All right!
All right.
All right.
Stop here!
All right.
All right! All right!
All right,
that's enough.
All right!
You ought to be
ashamed of yourself.
I thought you were
a nice little fellow.
I tried to be nice to you. To think
you'd play a trick like this on me.
You thought I was
going to fall in,
didn't you?
Whooo!
Come on, please.
- I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
- You should be.
Johnny, it was swell
of you to get us these jobs.
I'm glad
to help, boys.
Just see that you try
to keep them now.
Now, we've got
to find those crooks.
That may be your idea. My idea is
to let the crooks find us.
They're the last ones
I want to see in this world.
Never mind.
Come on, let's go.
- What are you going... no.
- Whooo!
Never mind that, you.
You wheel it in.
Come on. Come on.
Your dinner.
- Serve it right over there, please.
- Oui, oui, madame.
Look, baby,
duck in this next room.
It's almost time for my
first number downstairs.
- It's okay. If you're late I'll square it.
- All right.
Dinner is served.
It's over.
- Wait... wait a minute.
- Now we got them.
Let's knock them off
like we planned, eh?
What are you going
to knock us off for?
All we did was take your
picture coming out the bank.
You mean there was film
in those cameras?
Yeah. We only got
your backs.
- Quiet!
- Excuse me.
Now listen...
What he's trying
to tell you is,
we've got your backs
to the walls.
And if you don't
give us our money
we'll give the cops
the negatives.
Yes, if you don't
give us the money
we'll give the cops the
negatives, and that's positive.
Hold the phone, boys. There's no use
in our trying to jockey for the rail.
Why don't you give us the negative
and we'll give you your 25 Gs?
Where's the money?
Why, I've got that up in a cabin
not far from here.
Oh, yeah? I've got
the negative, too,
and it ain't
very far from here.
Shut up! Where's this cabin?
Tomorrow I'll take you up
with me and we'll exchange presents.
That's a date.
Come on, Tubby.
Out of my way.
Well, in case you fellows
want to see me
you know where
you can get me.
Say, wait a minute.
That lady inside wants
to talk to you.
That lady wants
to talk to me?
Mm-hmm. I think
she kind of goes for you.
You just make yourself to home.
I'll bring her out.
Come on, boys.
The lady goes for me.
Sweetheart, now's the time to
pay me back for that little favor.
I want you to go in there and get
the negative from the little guy.
But how will I do it?
Well, it will take
a little strategy,
but you're a strategy...
with a figure.
I'd like to talk
to you for a moment.
Won't you sit
over there?
- Cigarette?
- No, ma'am, I don't smoke.
Oh!
- Drink?
- No ma'am. I don't drink.
Perfume?
No ma'am, I don't...
what I was going to say...
Did you ever take
a girl out?
I'm too young.
Which one of you boys
has the negative?
Me.
May I see it?
No.
Now may I see it?
No.
Now may I see it?
No.
I give up!
I've had enough.
You've had enough?
Well, no, not me.
Oooh, ooh, ooh!
I never had a kiss
affect me like this before.
What's the matter?
What's the matter?
I get it.
Ohhh!
In the ancient land
of Switzerland
Where the customs
never change
They yodel- o-del high
Because the Alps
are in their range
Instead of giving
orchids there
They give 'em edelweiss
Instead of merely kissing them
They slap 'em once or twice
First grab a partner
Then let each
belle and beau
Join hands together
And do a figure "O."
But if your heartbeat
Is 23 below
You turn and clap...
And then you slap...
Here's my advice
To each charmer
in the dell
If Willie loves you
And you love Willie well
Let Willie kiss you,
but don't let William tell
Or Mama slap
A double slap
Oh-le-o-lay
This is the slap-happy polka
of the day...
"Fall in love,"
say the silver skates
Describing figure eights
Across the ice
Boys and girls
in their skating shoes
Men: Will soon be raiding shoes and rice
Band:
So just grab your partner
And whirl her
once or twice
You'll find the polka
Will help you
break the ice
Then kiss the missus
because it feels so nice
And then you clap
And then you slap
Oh-le-o-lay
This is the slap-happy polka
of the day
Here's my advice
to each charmer in the dell
If Willie loves you,
and you love Willie well
Let Willie kiss you,
but don't let William tell
Or Mama slap
A double slap
- Oh-le-o-lay
- Oh-le-o-lay
This is the slap-happy polka
of the day
- Oh-le-o-lay
- Oh-le-o-lay
This is the slap-happy polka
of the da-a-ay.
Are you being paid
to do this?
Mr. Fellowsby ordered me
to take the afternoon off.
Does that meet with your
approval, Dr. Legree?
Now wait a minute,
don't get me wrong.
I have to protect
my patients.
If Mr. Fellowsby says you
should go out and enjoy yourself,
suppose we do it together? Come
on, let me show you how to skate.
University
of Wisconsin, '38.
University of Toronto, '41.
No hard feelings, I hope?
Oh no.
- Flash!
- Doc!
I never expected
to see you up here.
I thought you were
a photographer, not a waiter.
It's a long story. Remember that
bank across from the hospital?
Bank? Say, those pictures
in the newspaper...
I thought they looked like you.
You're hiding out.
No, we're on the trail
of the crooks.
The cops think
we robbed that bank.
When we prove our innocence,
you're going to lose a patient.
- You mean Fellowsby?
- That's right.
Now it all ties up. When Peggy
said he was out of the room...
He was across the street
robbing the bank.
That's why they
brought her up here.
She knows too much.
Where's Tubby?
There he is.
Come on.
Get up. Get up!
Tubby, I never expected
to see you on skates.
I don't ever expect
to see myself on them either.
Come on, get up
and wait on the tables.
Okay.
Now hold me, kid.
Take it easy.
Take it easy.
That kid is strong.
Right foot,
left foot,
right foot...
everybody's doing it.
Right foot,
left foot.
Right foot...
Whooooh!
Here I come!
Whooooh!
I can't hang on
any longer!
I don't like this!
Whoooh!
I don't like this!
Here I come!
Oh, Peggy!
Are you following me,
I hope?
You've got to pack up and
get back to town immediately.
And don't stop
to tell Mr. Fellowsby.
And just when I was
beginning to think you were human.
You've got to trust me.
You'll understand everything later.
I understand everything now.
It positively hurts you
to see me with a job.
I hate to do this, but you force
me to order you off the case.
- You're to leave immediately
- I understand, Doctor.
Now see if you
understand this.
- I've come to say goodbye.
- Oh, you're leaving?
Yes, Dr. Burns and I
don't seem to get along.
And I might add
that in my opinion
you're not sick enough
to need a nurse.
Your reasons would
interest me.
They're not important.
I'll leave my address at the desk
and you can mail me the check.
Now, now, nurse,
let's not do anything rash.
Stay on for a couple of days
and I'll make it worth your while.
Sorry, I really must go.
Now, you be
a smart girl and...
- Look, Mr. Fellowsby,
if you think you can frighten me...
Take her inside.
Oh, Doctor,
I was just about
to ring for you.
Doctor, I think I'd like to go
up to that mountain cabin now.
I don't think that would be
advisable in your condition.
I think the fresh air
will be good for me.
I'd like you to come up
and take care of me.
What about Miss Osborne?
Won't she be there?
No. I told her
to take today off.
Very well, Mr. Fellowsby,
whatever you say.
I'll get my things together
and leave word at the office.
That dame's got more legs
than a centipede.
You don't mean to tell me a big lug like
you had trouble tying up a little girl?
Next time get a male nurse...
one that don't bite.
What about those friends of yours...
the boys from Detroit?
They'll be following us.
You can depend on that.
Get 'em all
out there together,
out on one of those
big snowbanks.
One push and... gin!
Come here, I want
to talk to you, Flash.
Fellowsby is heading
for the mountain cabin.
He wants me to go
along with him.
That's the cabin
where he's hidden the money.
Right. You get ahold of Tubby
and get there ahead of them
and keep watch until they
come out with the money.
Leave it to Tubby and me.
We'll take care of everything.
- Okay. I'll see you up there.
- Okay.
Come on, Tubby.
We've got to get to that
mountain cabin before they do.
What's that for?
In case we meet
WC Fields.
Wooo.
Right. Oatmeal!
Cornmeal!
Mush!
Whoa!
Hey, that must be
the place.
There's no other place
around the place.
That must be the place.
- Come on.
- Okay. Wait there, kids.
Looks like we're
the first one's here.
I'll try and get
in the window.
It must be locked
from the inside.
- Hey, give me a boost.
- Go ahead.
Why didn't you tell me
that door was open?
- You said you wanted to come through the window.
- Hold that glove.
- Give me that.
- You hold it. I mean after all...
Put your hands down.
What's the matter?
What's the matter?
Oh, come here!
Come here!
Come here! It's only
a bearskin. Look!
Don't tell me
about those things.
- I used to hunt them.
- You hunted bear?
- Oh no, I had my clothes on.
- Stop it.
Another thing, I want to tell
you about this hunting business...
once when I was hunting,
it was lightning and thundering.
- Out of the woods came a big animal with horns.
- Reindeer?
- It sure did, honey.
- Come on, let's get in the next room.
Come on.
Never mind that.
All right, don't fight.
Stand still.
We'll stay in here till we find
out where they hide the money.
When they go to sleep,
we'll grab it,
take it back to the bank
and clear ourselves.
When don't you let me
overpower them like you said?
- I'll give them the old
one-three. - All right, stop.
You couldn't whip cream
with an outboard motor.
- Is that so?
- And I'll prove it to you.
- Do you see this handkerchief?
- Do you got a cold?
Never mind the cold.
I'll place that on the floor.
I'll stand on one end of it. You stand on the
other and I'll bet you $5 you can't hit me.
You'll put
the handkerchief on the floor,
stand on one end, I stand on
the other, and I can't hit you?
- That's right.
- Both of us standing on it?
- That's right.
- Bet.
- $5. Put up your money.
- Okay.
- I'll hold it.
- All right.
There you are.
I'll put the gloves on because I
don't want to cut you when I hit you.
- Never mind that. Stand on the handkerchief.
- Okay, kid.
- Okay.
- Right, right.
Don't you hit me
until I say ready.
I'll wait
till you say it.
- And no cheating.
- No, no.
- No cheating.
- I'm standing on it. I'm standing.
I got a whole half a foot.
I got a whole half
of foot on there.
Flash:
I'm standing on the handkerchief.
Oh boy,
I'll knock him cold.
Go ahead and hit me.
What do ya got the door
here for?
- How am I gonna hit you
with the door?!
What's the idea of you playing
that kind of trick on me?
After all, I... don't tell
me you're scared of that?
- Don't... don't...
- Come on, come on.
It's only a bearskin.
Look.
No, you don't.
No, you don't.
What kept you?
That was a close shave.
I think someone's knocking
at the cabin door.
I don't see anybody
knocking at the door.
Are you sure?
I must be hearing things.
Hey, Flash,
does this
high altitude get you?
- No.
- It's getting me.
I've got the funniest pounding
going inside of my head.
Just like I had
a couple of those...
popsicles.
You know how I feel
when I have those things?
- Oh, behave.
- Little elves hit me in the head all the time.
Hey.
- What's the matter?
- Now I hear bells.
- Dr. Burns: Let me help you, Mr. Fellowsby.
- Thank you.
There we are.
- Come on.
- Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
Whoa, boy.
As long as you
have the negative
we hold the whip hand.
I think so.
You know what I'm gonna do?
- What?
- I'm gonna bluff 'em.
- What are you doing here?
- Well, I...
Sorry to have to do this, Doc,
but we can't take any chances.
- Take care of the doctor, boys.
- Yeah, come on.
- Oooh!
- Look out!
You must be
getting old.
Keep an eye on 'em. When
those Detroit boys show up,
we'll get rid
of the whole lot.
Come on!
Drop that gun or I'll drill you!
I got a gun here
shoots bullets for 12 miles
and throws rocks the rest
of the way.
Do you want him to drill you,
or do you want to play ball?
We'll play ball.
I'm a pretty good shortstop.
Thattaboy!
Get out of the way!
You ain't so tough,
you little pig!
- Who are you calling a pig?
- You!
With the price of pork
nowadays, is that an insult?
- Now boys, let's talk it over, eh?
- Okay.
You're talking
to a pretty tough hombre.
Hey, ain't that the dame that
spotted us from the hospital?
Don't worry about her, pal.
She won't identify anybody.
Good. Hey you,
pick up that gun.
Come on, pick it up!
Let's have it.
Here you are, killer.
Take this gun.
Take them outside,
use them bullets on them.
If you come back with any,
I'll use them on you.
Okay, Boss.
Stand up, or I'll let
you have it sitting down.
On your feet.
Come on, get with it!
- I'll go along with you.
- No, you don't.
I'll handle
this myself.
Excuse me.
And when the killer gets back,
all witnesses wiped out,
we'll talk business.
What are you...
... ing about?
Tubby and me'll try
and bluff 'em until you get back.
Well, it's all over.
Okay, put the negative on the
table and we'll close the deal.
Where's the money?
Okay, I'll get it.
- Step aside.
- I ought to take a poke at you.
Why, you couldn't fight your way out
of an outboard motor
with whipped cream.
Whipped cream?
On second thought,
I don't think
you can do it.
- Do what?
- Poke me in the nose.
- Oh, can't I?
- No.
- Just stand there.
- You want to make a wager?
- Sure, I'll make a wager.
- What's your share of the cut?
- 10 Gs.
- That's all I wanted to know. 10 Gs, brother.
Here's your 10 Gs.
Put it on the table.
Put it on the table.
Don't count it. It's there.
- Here's mine. You got it?
- Yeah.
I'm going to get
a handkerchief.
Who's got one? Thank you.
Thank you ever so much, kid.
- See this handkerchief?
- Yeah.
I'm going to put it
on the floor.
You stand on one end,
I'll stand on the other.
I'll bet you can't touch me.
You'll bet your cut against mine that
if we both stand on the handkerchief
I can't touch you?
- You got the idea. Wanna make a bet?
- Yeah.
That's all I wanted to know,
brother. You'll get a bet.
That's all.
Now listen, shorty,
don't push.
You're going
to get your chance.
Here, you hold
the stakes.
I hope you know
what you're doing.
I'm going to outsmart them.
Now, Mr. Wise Guy,
I'm gonna show you.
I'll put the handkerchief on the
floor. You stand on that edge.
Stand on the edge of the
handkerchief. That's it.
I put my two feet here. When
I say ready, try and touch me.
Ready... wait a minute!
Wait a minute.
I forgot something.
Wait a minute.
Not here, not here.
Come on.
You stand over there...
by there.
I came pretty near
to getting killed. Wait a minute.
I got you all fixed.
Stand on the edge of the
handkerchief right there.
I'll stand on the edge here, and when
I say ready, you try and touch me.
Ready?
Get his gun.
- A banana!
- Why, the little monkey!
Find that negative.
Hey, here it is.
- Why, our faces aren't even in it!
- Now can I give it to him?
But you can't shoot
an unconscious man!
They're the best kind.
Well, that's that.
Now do you want
to talk business?
Cut it out or I'll show
your picture to the cops.
We saw that picture, friend.
It ain't a good likeness.
Nope, not at all.
- Hey, he's not...
- He will be.
Uh-oh.
Carry him upstairs.
I'll take care of you later.
Come on, honey.
Here, take my hand.
Ooh, take my arm...
Oooh.
Well, that's that!
Give me your hand.
Wait a minute.
What did I do?
Tubby, I'm so...
I'm sorry.
- Tubby...
- Oh, oh, oh!
Come... come on.
Get down! Get down!
Turn it around.
- Turn it around?
- Turn it around. Come here.
Get in your harness.
Get in your harness.
Do you think the boys
will be able to bluff them?
I hope so... at least until
we get back.
- I'll take the money.
- Ready.
Ready? Mush.
Will you ever
do anything right?
Why, you...! How are we
going to make our getaway now?
Wait a minute.
- A ski hut!
- Is that what you call it?
- Yes. We'll get away on skis. Come on!
- Okay, come on.
Oh.
Come on, let's get out of here
before those guys come to.
Hurry up!
I'm going fast, boy!
Out of the way!
Gang way!
Gang way!
Come on, you lugs, snap out of it!
They're getting away with our money.
- Wait a minute. Where's the money?
- Money?
- What do you think,
money grows on trees?
I think you got
something there.
Come on!
Okay.
- How do we catch 'em?
- These skis. Let's take them.
Flash, wait for me!
Tubby... Tubby, balance
yourself with the sticks!
Woo-woo!
Here's the dough, boss!
Hey, I just caught
a forward pass.
Timber!
Woooo!
Hey, let me off
at the next stoplight.
Hey, Flash, one down!
Two to go!
Keep going!
Keep going!
Wooo!
Woooo!
Look out, Tubby!
You've got a bear behind!
Get off! Get your own skis!
Get your own skis!
Go back to hibernating!
Look out, Tubby!
Whoooo!
Oh, oh, oh!
Hey Flash,
two down one to go.
Well, pick him up
and put him in the chair.
Pick him up.
Fore!
Grab the money,
let's go.
Fellowsby: I'll take that.
I was just going
to give it to you.
Well, give it to me.
Okay.
Three down
and gold to go.
We're ready, Doc.
Here's the one
of the gang now!
All right,
take him away, boys.
Here's another
one of them.
Flash: Look out below! Look out, gang way!
Touchdown!
I arrest you
in the name of the law.
Wait a minute, Sheriff,
you've got the wrong man.
I've got the crook in here. I've got
him in here someplace. Right here.
Oh, a hitchhiker.
Go on your way.
Here's the real crook
right over here. Come on.
Here's your man!
- What happened to me?
- I got you all balled up.
Go on take him.
Take him away.
Go ahead take him away.
Take everybody away.
May I tell
Tubby about us?
Tubby, you're wonderful.
You're a hero.
I want you to be the first to know
we're going to be married.
I'm going to be a bride.
Flash!
Hey, Flash, I'm going
to be a June bride.
Tubby! Tubby!
Tubby!? Tubby!?
Ah, another hitchhiker.
What's everybody
running for?
Go on, join your pal.
Go ahead.
Join your pal over there.
I hope she don't
miss the train.
I don't want to go
on my honeymoon by myself.
I'm going to have you
over for Sunday dinner.
- That's swell.
- If she can cook.
Well, if she can't...
She can kiss.
Whooooo!
Ting-a-ling, ting-a-ling
Hear the ring of sleigh-bells
as they jingle along
To the song of merrymakers
saying goodbye with a sigh
To the Valley of the Snow
Oh oh oh
Pack your clothes,
winter hose on your toes
We're heading for a flat
in Manhattan
It's been excitingly delightful
and nice on the ice
But now we have to go
Oh yes, we have to go
We really have to go
- Women: So...
- Men: Come on, you cats
Don't idle in your rocker
Let's kick
the rhythm around
Kick it 'round
We'll doff our hats
To Father Knickerbocker
Because we're
happiness bound
Say, come sun,
come shine
Come rainbow
or come shower
Come join
the merry-go-round
Round and round
You'll still be mine
Come Tyrone
or come Power
Because we're
happiness bound
Hey there, Picklepuss,
give with the clarinet
- Men: Sassafras
- Women: Pipe with the double brass
Men and women:
Mister Thumbs, beat those drums
- Women: Solid Joe
- Men: Hi ho, Hi ho
We're leaving Track 11
So skin the mittens around...
skin 'em 'round
We'll ride the slide
And high-C
up to Heaven
We're hap-hap-hapiness bound
So long, so long
The train is at the station
Just wave
those hankies around
We're bound to reach
A happy destination
Because we're
happiness bound
So long, goodbye
We're leaving Track 11
With both our feet
on the ground
But by and by
We'll choo-choo
up to heaven
Because we're
happiness bound
Hey there, engineer
Open the throttle up,
Abraham
Shine up the stars because
we've got two tickets to paradise
And should you write
Our future
home address is
A cottage
small on the Sound
- Oh yes
- Women: Oh yes
- The honeymoon express...
- Here she comes now!
- Take it easy.
- Oh boy, isn't she beautiful?
Woo woo
Woo woo, woo woo.
Well, congratulate us, boys,
we're married.
Tubby, so are we married.
Would you like to kiss the bride?
Sure.
Married?
Married?
How could you do it without
me being there? Is it legal?
Oh, of course it's legal and we have
the bridal compartment on the train.
- Haven't we, Johnny?
- That's right, sweetheart.
Come up
and see us sometime.
I certainly will.
Thanks for the invitation.
Come up and...
see you sometime?
Certainly. She didn't marry
you, she married Johnny Long.
No Flash,
that can't be.
Conductor: All aboard.
All aboard.
If I ever fall in love
with another girl,
I hope they hang me.
Oh!
I was only kidding!
Can't you take a joke?
I was only kidding!