Hop (2011) Movie Script
You're looking at
the many noble rabbits
who have served as
the Easter Bunny.
If you've ever
gotten a basket of candy
and colored eggs
on Easter morning,
you have them to thank.
Yes, even that guy.
See, every bunny dreams of holding the
title, but not just anyone can do it.
You have to be majestic.
You have to be dignified.
You have to be, well, a bunny.
Or, at least you did.
Hi. I'm Fred O'Hare,
the first human Easter Bunny.
Sounds insane, you say?
It'll make sense once you know
how it all went down.
E.B.?
E.B.?
Where are you?
Hi, Dad!
Woohoo!
Oh! There you are.
Son! I was thinking.
You are getting so big, you're
practically a foot tall.
Over a foot,
if you count the ears.
I always
count the ears.
So, how would you like to
go to work with me today?
Would I?
That sounds awesome.
I said the same thing when my father
first took me to the factory.
I didn't use the word "awesome," but...
Down, please.
Thank you. Go ahead, Son.
Take a look.
Whoa!
Look at all that candy.
Come on, come on.
See you.
This is so cool!
Oh, careful! E.B., welcome
to the Easter Factory.
This is where we make
all the candy and eggs
that I deliver to
the children of the world.
It's pretty impressive,
isn't it?
It's amazing, Dad!
I'm glad you like it, because
someday this will all be yours.
Really?
Now, come on, Son.
There's so much to see.
Daddy, what do you
call that thingamajig?
Ah, the Marshmallow
Chick Machine.
Loved them since
I was your age.
When your grand-dad,
the Easter Bunny before me,
took me on this
very same tour...
Hello.
Hello, little bunny.
What are you doing?
We don't eat the candy.
We make the candy!
But I thought...
E.B.
This is my second-in-command,
Carlos.
It's fine, Carlos. E.B. was, uh,
taste-testing.Isn't that right, Son?
Yup, I'm taste-testing.
It's great.
Oh, dear me. No, no.
Son, we're going to have
to work on your taste.
Carlos, too much marsh,
not enough mellow.
Exactly, seor, I was
just going to say that.
Phil! Too much marsh,
not enough mallow!
Phil! Phil!
Phil!
Hi, boss.
No dancing on the job!
It's forbidden.
Yes, sir. I'm very bad.
I am so sorry, seor.
I will deal with this personally.
Yes. Easter is right
around the corner, Carlos.
There is no room for error.
Si, seor.
Remember this, E.B.,
we can't make any mistakes.
The entire world
is counting on us.
This seems hard, Dad.
And I don't know if I can do it.
Oh, come now.
Don't you worry, Son.
Yes, it's a big responsibility,
but you'll be ready.
You'll have to be.
Why, in a few years you will
pick up the Egg of Destiny
and receive the magical powers
of the Easter Bunny.
Now, let's move on.
Bye, Carlos.
Okay, ciao.
See you later.
Enjoy your life of privilege,
little bunny.
So, how are
my kids doing?
I had rehearsals for
the Easter play today.
Oh.
They usually cast
a boy as Peter Cottontail,
but they made
an exception for me
on account of my
singing voice is so strong.
That's great, honey.
Sam, how about you?
Well, I'm up for
a big promotion at work.
Really? That's terrific.
Good to hear that two of my
kids are working so hard.
So, Fred. How did
that job interview go?
I don't know
about that place, Dad.
I just don't know if it's
really what I'm looking for.
Really?
Did they pay money?
Then it's exactly
what you've been looking for.
Well, that's just crass.
What are you nodding for?
"Dear Fred, as your mother
I have always loved you,
"and it hurts me
to have to tell you
"in this way,
but there comes a time
"when every young man must
grow up and leave the nest. "
You all prepared statements?
Fred, we're just doing this
because we love you, Son.
The Sadeki family
down the street went
through the same thing
with their son Jordy.
He just laid on the couch all
day watching court shows,
but then they had
an intervention,
and now he works in a pharmacy,
and has an apartment.
I don't really want
to work at a pharmacy, Mom.
Well, you need to do something.
You need to get a life.
You need to get a job
and you need to move out.
Especially that last one.
But I did move out.
And I had a job.
Is it my fault
the company downsized?
Fred, that was
over a year ago!
You have to get
back on the horse.
And you have so
much potential.
Thanks, Mom.
Sometimes I
think you adopted me
because Fred was
such a disappointment.
Wow.
Alex, that is
a very hurtful statement.
You're not denying it.
Eat your dinner.
Mom, Dad, I'm trying, okay?
I go on job interviews. I had one today!
Yes, but it wasn't what you were
looking for. It's always something.
You didn't like the commute.
The parking lot was too far
away from the building.
The man in the cubicle
next to you smelled.
He smelled.
Fred,
nothing is ever
good enough for you.
You don't want me
to settle, do you?
Settling is fine.
Dad, when I was a kid,
you said that when I grew up I
was going to do something great.
Yes. But now I'm telling you that
you should forget about "great,"
and settle for
getting any job.
We should have nudged you out
of the nest a long time ago.
Baby birds get a nudge.
Giant birds who never leave,
they get shoved.
E.B.!
E.B.!
Hello, Dad.
So, what do you think?
Uh, what did I...
It was great! Really kicking.
But, E.B., shouldn't you be
rehearsing your speech?
You're about to be
crowned the Easter Bunny
in front of
Uh, yeah, about that.
Yes?
LOOK, Dad,
ever since I was
yea big, it's been,
"The Easter Bunny
wouldn't do that" and
"The Easter Bunny
has to be perfect. "
But I'm not perfect.
I know that, Son.
But you'll get there, eventually.
But I'm...
Listen.
You want me to be this.
But maybe I'm not this.
Just maybe, maybe I'm this.
A Sock?
Ugh. "
Yeah, that's right.
I might be a metaphorical sock.
I might not be
a good enough egg,
but I might be
the best sock ever.
I might not cut it
delivering Easter baskets,
but I might be
great at something else.
Oh, the drums!
Why, I think that's fine.
I think it's really nice that you have
a hobby. Everyone should have a hobby.
It's not a hobby, Dad.
I want to drum in a band.
I want to see the world.
E.B., the Easter
Bunny sees the world.
Every country in one night,
making people of the world happy.
Really, Dad?
The whole world?
What about China?
No!
Look, it's candy, woman!
Madam, please.
All right. So,
we haven't cracked China yet.
But, for all those that do
believe, you will be there.
No, Dad. I don't want
to be the Easter Bunny.
Now, listen to me.
Four thousand years of
tradition doesn't end
just because one selfish bunny
doesn't feel like doing it.
Look. Dad...
No, E.B., you look!
You are going to
be the Easter Bunny!
Now you need to get it together,
get rid of these drums,
and get your
priorities straight!
I'll see you out there!
No, I don't think you will.
Destination.
Where dreams come true.
In-flight snack preference.
Any baggage?
Just emotional.
I'm sorry, Dad.
OW!
I did it.
Hollywood.
Right. First order of business,
find a place to stay.
Perfect.
Fred, wait, wait, wait! Fred.
Did you know
about this, Sam?
Oh, uh...
You did.
Okay, look.
The rules of this
intervention state
that I am not
supposed to help you, okay?
So you can't tell anyone
what I'm about to do.
No! I'm not going to
take money from you.
Wasn't going to
give you money.
We can call it a loan.
Fred, look,
I got you a job interview
tomorrow at my friend's company.
I'm a little
slammed tomorrow.
I know you're not.
I'm pretty busy.
No.
Look, it's an
entry-level position.
Entry-level?
At a video game company!
Okay. That's kind of cool.
I know.
All right, look, if it means
that much to you, I'll swing by.
No, Fred.
You don't "swing by. " Okay?
You shower, you shave, and you show up.
The three "shs. "
Come on, Fred. You've
got to start your life.
Think of this as a reboot.
Right!
It's time.
Yeah. You know what?
You're right.
In a couple of months,
couple of weeks,
you're gonna see
a whole new Fred.
Yeah. By Easter.
Easter is in two weeks.
By Easter, I'm going to have a new
job, a new place, a new life.
Great!
Okay.
Now if you'll excuse me,
I'm going to go
sleep in my car.
Fred, listen.
My boss is on vacation for a few
weeks and he asked me to house-sit.
Nobody ever asks
me to house-sit.
I know.
It's so weird.
Anyway, he has dogs,
and you know I'm scared of
dogs, so take over for me.
Wait. Your boss lives in
a big mansion, right?
Yes, in Beverly Hills.
And he loves his house
more than he loves his kids.
So you have
to behave. Okay?
Do not touch anything.
Do not break anything.
Do not go upstairs!
Wait, what's upstairs?
Fred.
Okay.
And do not forget
to feed the dogs.
Got it!
Thank you, Sam.
You're welcome.
I put the address
on the paper.
Okay.
But, Fred?
Yeah?
If you screw up,
I'll kill you.
Okay.
Listen to me. This is the Playboy
Mansion. it's not a hotel.
Yeah, right.
But it says here
that ever since 1971,
the Playboy
Mansion has been home
to sexy bunnies
from around the world.
Friend, I can't see you.
Please step forward.
Now, I'm telling you that I am
both a bunny, and incredibly sexy.
I don't have time for this.
Hello? Hello?
Maybe this is the rags part
of my rags-to-riches story.
All right, let's see here.
Whoa!
Look at this!
Hello, Fred's new crib.
Maybe this is
a good thing.
All great artists suffer
before they become famous.
That lady wrote
Harry Potter in a ditch.
But it's the hunger,
loneliness
and exhaustion
that gets you really.
How could this
night get any worse?
I see.
Car accident. Thank you!
OW!
Why?
Oh, ow!
It's still alive.
I've got to help him out.
This will do.
Don't you worry,
little friend.
I'm going to end
your suffering.
No!
Who said that?
Well, who do
you think said it?
Your latest victim.
You know what? We can leave the
insurance companies out of this.
I could just, maybe, come live
with you for a couple of months.
No, no, no!
Not real. Not real. Not real.
Excuse me?
You left your car back there,
with the lights on.
I'm just saying!
Say something. Talk again.
I'm E.B. And you are?
I'm Fred.
Well, Fred, I am so hungry.
Have you got anything
in the old snack department?
Okay.
Here you go.
Oh! Oh! That's.. -
What is this?
What? It's Turkey Jerky.
First, you hit me with your car,
and then you try and poison me
with a meat stick.
Why do you hate me?
Okay. Is there something you'd
rather eat, you weird little thing?
Well...
Carrots!
He's a genius.
One carrot. Okay.
Time to hop away out of Fred's
life back to the Enchanted Forest.
You're kicking me out?
Yeah. it's a bad time.
Yeah. Did some jerk
just hit you with his car?
That kind of bad time?
No, I'll tell you what.
It's fine.
Oh, me leg. OW.
I mean,
you can't be expected to help
every innocent
creature you wound.
And I'm sorry if I dented your
bumper with my face and body.
Do you want me to look
for some baby aspirin?
No, no! You save it.
You might run over a baby.
Just pray that sweet messenger
of death visits quickly.
Is that the icy hand now?
Okay, wait!
On the off-chance that you're really
here and I'm not completely crazy,
and I did run you
over and you're hurt...
I guess you can stay.
Thanks, mate. And I could bunk
down anywhere. Seriously.
West wing, master suite,
guest bedroom. I'm not picky.
Right. Okay.
What's this space, then?
This is a place for you
to stay for the night.
I'm not a car.
So why would I need to stay here?
Look, it's not my house.
I'm not even allowed to go
upstairs, and I'm human.
Sorry. What are
the newspapers for?
Because I'm not really a
voracious reader or anything.
You know, you're an animal.
So, we all know animals...
I understand.
I'll just sleep down here,
among my poo and
pee like a pig.
If you like,
you use it as well.
Sorry.
No, don't reproach yourself
for these medieval conditions.
Yeah, whatever.
I'm going to go to bed where,
hopefully, I've been all along.
So, good night.
Oh, okay,
I'll just stay here then.
By myself.
In the dark.
With the door closed.
Seor. Seor
I have news.
Operations are
running at full capacity.
With my supervision, we are
right on target for Easter.
Fine, fine.
But is there any report on my son?
Yes, I have the report.
The sun will be shining,
foggy times are lifting.
Easter will be
clear sailing, seor.
Not the sun.
My son, E.B.!
That son.
Yes. I almost forget.
The rabbit hole was used for an unscheduled
trip earlier this evening, sir!
What? You mean he ran away?
And at the height
of our busiest time.
It's almost unforgivable.
But how could he just take off like this?
It's just not like him.
Please, seor.
Don't be too rash.
It's way too
early to disown him.
But I wasn't going to...
Wait a minute. Are you hopping?
Am I? I didn't notice.
It just comes
so naturally.
Anyway, seor considering your
obvious distraction with this,
wouldn't it be wise to pass the mantle
to, I don't know, somebody else?
Hmm.
Let's see. It would have
to be someone you trust.
Someone who is
comfortable giving orders.
Phil! Keep doing that,
but do it faster!
Faster. Gotcha.
And stop dancing!
No dancing. Yes, sir.
Carlos, you're right.
I'm totally right.
Assemble
the Pink Berets at once!
I'm sorry. What?
We need to find E.B.
The Pink Berets?
But they're only to be used in a
situation of extreme emergency.
This is pretty extreme, Carlos.
The Pink Berets will find E.B.
They have to!
You can't ignore me
forever, Senor Bunny.
Freeze!
Who's there? Is this the same guy?
Don't make me come down there.
to an overturned tractor trailer
at the Burbank entrance.
Weather is
a cool 72 degrees...
Rabbit.
Hello?
Talking rabbit?
Okay. Wow.
Dude, you are stressed.
Hi, Fred O'Hare.
Hey, Fred O'Hare.
Nice to meet you.
I'm Fred O'Hare.
You need me for this job.
You're going to
hire me for this job.
Oh! The dogs. Right.
"Sam, until Daisy and Baby
are accustomed to you,
"please wear the safety suit in the
hall closet when you feed them. "
Safety suit?
Daisy! Baby! Come here.
Let's go.
I'm on a schedule here.
Oh!
No!
No! Heel! Sit! Sit!
That's fine.
Okay, it's all good.
No, no, no!
Look, Fred!
Can you believe it?
They've got
a drum kit in here.
What do you think?
Never had one formal lesson!
I am the Extreme Rock Master!
I know what
you're thinking.
No, you really don't.
Hey, Fred, what's wrong?
You look a bit put out.
Why are you still here?
You can't be up here.
You're in the forbidden part of the house.
Yeah, but so are you.
Pick this up, man.
You've destroyed the place!
I wouldn't say, "destroyed.
" I was just getting comfortable.
What about your injury? Huh?
Your leg? You're hurt, right?
Yeah, exactly. I needed a soft
bed in which to convalesce.
Oh, I see. So, you climbed
a flight of stairs...
Struggled up each stair is more like it.
Worth it, though.
That Jacuzzi
loosened me right up.
Jacuzzi?
Oh, yeah. You might
want to turn it off.
It was creating
a lot of bubbles.
No!
My sister is
going to kill me!
Don't worry.
We'll clean it up together,
as soon as I've
beat my high score.
Hey, Fred! Come on, your turn.
Pick up a guitar, mate.
Fred, I think
we got off on the wrong foot.
You said some things,
I flooded some things.
Let's start over again.
Fred? Why am I in a box?
This seems like the sort of
thing a serial killer might do.
Is this going
to be a surprise?
All right,
come on. Out.
Oh! Are we
going for a hike?
Better! We're
releasing you into the wild.
The wild?
Oh, no, no, no. I'll just
stay with you, I think.
This place seems to be
dominated by carnivores
Get out. Let's go.
What are you doing?
You're going to leave me here?
Yeah, there's lots of rabbits out here.
You'll feel right at home.
Fred, are we locked in
a destructive relationship?
Get out. Fred.
You're making a scene!
Get out!
Move along.
Look, Fred.
Goodbye!
But I want to stay with you!
Fred, please don't go.
I'm already late. So go away.
Come on, man.
Fred, mate.
I'll behave.
I'll clean up my mess.
I'll do the dishes.
Not your problem.
There are no dishes in the wild.
No. Fred.
But I'm special.
Well, we're all special.
You're not getting it.
I don't mean special as in,
"everybody's special. "
I mean, I'm really special.
What're you doing?
See?
Jelly beans?
Mmm-hmm.
So what? So you talk
and you poop candy.
Could you do it in
someone else's life?
No, you're right.
It's not your concern.
And in two weeks, maybe you can
explain to the children of the world
why they didn't get
their Easter baskets.
Easter?
What, Easter?
No way.
Yes, Fred.
I am the Easter Bunny.
Hop in.
Yes! I knew it! I knew it.
I knew you were real. I knew it!
What are you talking about?
Of course I'm real.
No.
When I was a kid,
I saw you on Easter morning.
You did?
Yeah.
That was you,
right?
Absolutely. No question.
Okay. Because you do look a
little different. Was it...
I don't know, have you lost weight?
Or maybe it's the clothes.
You're talking
about the old guy.
Yeah. We got rid of him.
He didn't understand children. Ah.
He didn't get that children
sometimes just want to drum.
I mean, dream.
Sometimes they just want to dream.
Children dream.
Yeah. So he had to go,
anyway, this guy. Right.
Well, it's a good thing
you got rid of him, then.
Exactly.
So... Wait a minute.
Why are you here now?
Just doing a little last minute
recon for Easter deliveries.
Finding ideal egg hiding locations.
There is one. That's perfect!
Compiling a list of kids
with chocolate allergies.
That kind of thing.
it's all very technical.
I see.
Okay.
Oh, man. I'm really late.
Late for what?
What are we doing?
I have a job interview.
You're staying here.
But here is boring. Let me come with you.
I could be a job reference.
Thank you, I appreciate that.
Look, I really need this job,
and I don't think anyone there is
going to be able to handle you.
I'm not sure I can handle you.
So, just do me a favor? Wait in the car.
Fred, I don't want
to get your hopes up,
but I think you're definitely
going to get this job.
Be good.
Yes, sir.
I'll stay here and
guard the vehicle.
Yes, sir. I'll put
you through to Mr. Hill.
Hi, I'm Fred O'Hare.
I'm here for a 10:30 with
Mrs. Beck.
You're a half-hour late.
I know. I called.
That doesn't make
you any earlier.
Uh-huh.
You know, you're the first impression
people get when they walk in here.
In many ways, you are the
face of the company.
Fill this Out.
Yes, ma'am.
Yes, sir. Can I help you?
What is that alarming noise?
Oh, no!
Pink Berets!
I'm sorry, sir.
Who did you want to speak to?
Fred.
What are you doing here?
I told you to wait in the car!
This is serious.
I really need your help!
I need your help! You can't be here.
You've got to go!
Fred?
Yes.
Get me out of here!
Ah!
Mrs. Beck.
Yes.
How are you?
I'm well. I can't say that I'm that
impressed with your punctuality, though.
Yeah, I have
half a dozen excuses.
But I'm just going to go
with a straight apology.
I'm really, really sorry.
Okay. Clean slate, then.
Thank you.
So, let's begin, Fred.
I'll show you inside.
Whoa!
So, recent
employment history.
You haven't
worked in a year?
Yeah, my parents
have moved in with me.
That has sort of been a full-time job.
Mmm-hmm.
It's fine. It just gets in the
way of writing my novel, is all.
You're writing a novel?
What is that about?
It's about a crippled soldier who, in
the future, goes to another planet
and he becomes
one of the indigenous people
who are blue and
live in the forest.
That's not Avatar?
Not really.
So, why don't
we take a walk
and I can tell you a little
bit about the company?
Okay.
So, the good news is, we
tend to promote from within.
But you'd be
starting in the mailroom.
Mailroom.
Is that a problem?
No, no, I love mail.
I get lots of mail.
E- mail,
snail mail, chain mail.
I am male.
Speaking of mail, that's Cody.
Let me introduce you to him.
He is being promoted to junior exec
and you would be replacing him.
Wow. Congratulations.
Question.
I need 30 copies of something,
collated, stapled, bound
and on my desk
by yesterday.
What do you do?
I would make 30 copies, and I
would do what you said with them.
I smell potential.
Oh, Mrs. Beck, I was wanting
to talk to you about my lunch.
Fred. Fred!
What is wrong with you?
This is
an extreme emergency.
You're ruining this for me.
You really need to go.
You're right.
I'll create a diversion
and we'll escape in
the ensuing chaos.
E.B., no! Get back here!
Fred?
Yeah.
I got a good feeling about this place.
Where to next?
Sounding good to me.
But where is Ricky?
We need to put
a back beat behind that.
A back beat.
I think Ricky
went out for coffee.
I guess he's back.
How you feeling, Ricky?
Yeah, I'm smashing.
I mean, I'm fine.
I'm just fine, daddy-o.
Well, then let's do it.
Okay, so this our sport...
Oh.
This is our sports-game
motion-capture studio.
Mmm-hmm.
In here?
Yeah.
Ah!
Hockey.
It's golf.
And this is our sound recording
studio for our music games.
We've done Extreme Rock
Master; Extreme Jazz Master;
and now we're doing
Extreme Blues Master.
Sounds like a cool idea.
Whoa,
you got the Blind Boys of...
Quit it!
I'm going to kill you so bad! Get out!
Okay, Fred,
let's try and keep moving...
I'm all of a sudden not
feeling so good. Oh.
Do you have a restroom?
Yeah.
Where is that?
That was brilliant!
I mean, that was tight.
Sounded all right.
But I know my drummer when I hear him.
So, who are you, boy?
Okay, I admit it. I'm not a blues man.
My name is E.B.
I'm just some
guy off the street
with two sticks of
wood and a dream.
I understand if
you throw me out.
I get it if you don't
want to give me a break.
Hey, slow down, friend.
You know, we have a buddy who is
always on the lookout for new talent.
And the man is a genius.
He is the godfather of entertainment.
And he's having
auditions tomorrow.
The Hoff?
You mean he can help me?
If he like you.
Wow. Thanks, Blind Boys.
Good luck, little rabbit.
Wait,
how did you know I was...
Mmm!
Clever gents.
So, Fred, how'd it go?
Don't say a word.
Can I get a little
clarification, here?
Is this what
the Easter Bunny does now?
He just goes house to house,
messing up people's lives?
Well, that
is just hurtful.
Besides, you're
selling yourself short.
They were going to
shove you in the mail room.
Well, excuse me, but I happen to
think you're better than that.
You don't Know me, okay?
We just met.
I can tell. You give off this
aura of untapped potential.
I do?
Don't pull that with me, rabbit, okay?
I'm too smart for you.
But, Fred, I'm serious.
You're destined to do something great.
I just know it.
I've heard that one before.
You'll find an awesome job.
Hey. Look, what about this?
Dog walker?
No.
TSA Officer?
No.
What about this one?
It looks exciting.
Wind in your hair,
hot babe on your arm.
That's a car ad.
You should buy that car, then.
Ah! Seor.
How you doing, jefe?
Am I disturbing?
It's never been
this quiet in here.
Yeah, it's so depressing.
You should clear this out.
Make a new den or a clubhouse.
Like a man-cave!
It'll be fun.
I called his
dreams ridiculous.
What kind of
father does that?
No, no, seor.
I will not permit you
to beat yourself up over this.
Anybody would be lucky
to have a father such as you.
Thank you, Carlos.
I miss him.
Me, too, seor.
A son is very
difficult to replace.
Difficult, but
not impossible.
Carlos...
What the...
What's that on your head?
What? My new earmuffs?
It's a cold spring
this year, you know? Brr!
Oh.
Anyway, what am I going to do?
I know,
how can you deliver Easter
with this tremendous burden
on your old, frail shoulders?
Hey, hey, hey, easy
with the "old. "
No, I'm just saying,
like, compared to me.
Surely you're not thinking
of making the trip yourself?
What choice
do we have?
We can improvise. I mean...
Does it even have to be a bunny?
What?
I suppose,
given these troubled times,
even a humble
chick could do the job.
Really, Carlos.
Wow. I mean,
that is funny.
Can you imagine that?
A chick delivering Easter?
That's ridiculous.
Oh, dear me.
But I appreciate you trying
to cheer me up, though.
Please. It is my pleasure
to amuse you, seor.
A chick delivering...
Fred, I was wondering if...
Are you doing
anything tomorrow?
Tomorrow I get to start my new
job at the video game company.
Wait a second.
No, that didn't work out.
I know. I know.
I'm sorry about that.
But do you know what?
Every cloud has a silver lining.
And behold this
silver lining, Fred!
The Hoff?
Yes, please.
I just need a ride.
Mmm.
No.
Come on, Fred.
This is my one big chance.
I'll do anything.
Even get out of your life.
I take you to Hoff Knows Talent,
and that's it, we're done.
Bunny's honor.
Right here, mate.
It's okay.
A verbal agreement is fine.
Now, you realize,
you can't talk.
No. I can.
No, what I mean is,
you shouldn't talk.
What? Like, ever?
Yeah,
"ever" would be wonderful.
But from now on, especially
not in front of other people.
They might freak out and
want to dissect your brain.
Dissect? That's
a bit extreme.
There's an easy explanation
as to why I can talk.
It's a simple combination
of cuteness and magic.
Okay. Here we go. One BLT.
And one order of carrot cake a
la mode, topped with, quote,
Whatever candy you have laying
around back there. Unquote.
Uh, excuse me.
Is that a cough drop?
Yeah. it's cherry.
It counts.
It's a peculiar garnish.
Can I get some
chocolate syrup?
Sure, doll.
Thanks, love.
It seems my brain is
still intact, Fred.
Fred,
I've just had an idea.
When I'm a famous rock star, I'm going
to buy a mansion just like this
and make you sleep in the garage
in a topsy-turvy switcheroo.
What do you think?
Oh, man. My sister is here.
You never told me
you had a sister.
There's still so much we don't
Know about each other, Fred.
If she goes upstairs,
I'm dead.
Why?
why?
Let me take you
back to this morning
when you flooded the bathroom
and you trashed the bedroom.
You remember that?
Fred, leave this to me.
I'll smooth it out with her. Ow!
Hey!
Look at me.
One word out of you, and it's
rabbit season. You got it?
Okay, I'm going to
run interference.
I need you to sneak upstairs
and clean up, quietly!
Sam!
Hi!
Hey, it's not a good time for me right now.
I was just leaving.
But you just got here.
I know, right?
Hey, what are these?
Oh!
There you are.
Mmm!
I'm on this North Beach diet.
It's carrots only.
That is why they're
all over the house.
I was going to
clean them up, though.
Okay, Fred, how did the
interview go? Yes?
Oh! Thank you for asking.
Amazing! I aced it.
Really?
Yeah.
No way!
Why are you so surprised?
Fred, that's awesome!
Place could use me, too.
Don't get me wrong, it was great.
It was good.
It was all right.
I just... I don't know if it was for me,
really. It just didn't gel.
Something felt a little off
about the whole thing.
I didn't get it.
Oh! What? What happened?
It's kind of hard to pinpoint
any one specific thing.
Oh, Fred.
I know. I know. I'm sorry.
What is that?
I wouldn't know because I'm
not allowed to go up there.
And I haven't
been up there once.
Hmm. Okay.
Sam, no, you're not allowed up
there, either. Don't go up there!
Sam, I'm begging you!
I can explain.
Oh, my God!
Look at this.
Look how cute this
stuffed bunny is!
Wow! Yeah. Oh.
So cute!
Isn't he?
Yeah, you know what?
Maybe we shouldn't be playing with him
because we're not really supposed to
be up here in the first place. So...
He's just so lifelike.
You think?
It's a little
freaky-looking to me.
Oh! Oh, he's so soft!
And cute, and cuddly,
and warm.
Okay!
Why don't we put him back before
things get uncomfortable?
No, I'm not uncomfortable.
Well, I'm uncomfortable because
I'm looking after the house
and it's my responsibility.
There we are.
All right.
Oh, my God!
Wow! Look at that.
He's a wind-up toy.
That is so adorable!
Yeah, I think
he might be broken.
Yeah, you're a broken
little guy, aren't you?
Hey... Ow!
Fred, I am really
worried about you.
Hmm!
Don't eat that.
You might not like the flavor.
Fred, relax.
Watermelon.
Can we go?
Look, Sam, I don't want you to worry, okay?
I'll get something.
Look, Fred, I just thought it would
make tomorrow night a lot easier
if you could tell Mom and Dad
that you had a job.
Whoa! What's
tomorrow night?
Alex's play! The one she's
been talking about for weeks.
Oh, that is easy.
I'm not going.
Oh, yeah, you are.
Fred, come on, she's your sister.
All right.
Wear something nice.
I'll wear something nice.
Don't forget, I love you.
I love you.
Put gas in your car. 7:00.
Bye.
Nice. Is she
seeing anyone?
No, she's single, and she's
looking for a rabbit.
Wow! There's a lot
of people here, Fred.
Way more than I imagined.
You nervous?
Well, a little.
It's just...
I'm starting to
feel a bit sick, Fred.
I've never actually played
in front of anybody.
Come on. This could be
your big opportunity.
I know it's my big chance,
but what if I blow it?
Relax. I'll give you
a good intro.
I'll set you up,
you knock them down.
Yeah?
Yeah.
Really?
Mmm-hmm.
Thank you, Fred.
No problem.
Now, if you could please remove
your claws from my shoulder.
Sorry about that.
That's my nerves.
Thanks.
Thank you.
Next.
Next.
Next.
Next.
Mr. Hasselhoff.
Yes.
May I call you The Hoff?
Yes.
Fantastic.
Sir, I realize that
you have seen it all.
But this...
This will stretch the limits
of even your vast experience.
What you're about to
see will mystify you.
It will challenge
the very scope...
Cut to the chase, my friend.
Okay. Uh...
I give you E.B.
Come on, let's drum.
Stop! Stop!
Stop, stop.
I don't want to hear anymore.
Come on! Mr. Hoff, we've been
waiting all day. Give the guy a chance.
I gave him a chance.
I didn't like it.
I loved it!
Woohoo!
Yes!
Hoff knows talent,
and that rabbit's got talent!
Thank you, David Hasselhoff!
I will not let you down.
This is a golden opportunity and
one I intend to realize fully!
Hey, wait.
You're not surprised
that I'm a talking rabbit.
Little man, my best
friend's a talking car.
Can you make it to a live taping
of the show Saturday night?
I'll send a limo.
Did you hear him?
Did you hear The Hoff?
I'm on my way, Fred!
It sounds like
The Hoff really dug you.
I mean, he is a good actor,
but I think he was sincere.
Thanks, mate. And don't think
I've forgotten our deal.
You've done your part.
And now I'm ready to
get out of your life.
Good. Yeah, good.
We've had some good times, eh?
Haven't we, Fred?
Yeah, there were a few.
You validated my
whole childhood dream.
And then, what else?
Let me think.
Good times.
Well, maybe just one good time.
But the main thing is
I got to meet the guy
on my second grade lunchbox.
Hasselhoff, wow!
E.B.?
E.B.?
E.B.?
Psst! Fred!
What are you doing?
Pink Berets.
Pink what?
Pink Berets.
There is nobody here.
Oh yes, there is.
If they see me, they'll take
me back to Easter Island
and I'll never get
my chance to drum!
Pink Berets? Huh?
Sounds super fierce.
Don't be fooled by
their adorable name.
They're the Easter
Bunny's Royal Guard!
But you're the Easter Bunny!
Aren't you?
Of course I am, technically.
What do you mean,
"technically"?
I'll explain later.
Just get in the car.
Look, I was supposed to take
over this year, but I ran away.
What are you, crazy?
Who wouldn't want to
be the Easter Bunny?
That's, like,
the greatest job ever!
Yeah, you'd think so.
But it's what my dad wants, not me.
He expects so much.
What's left for me to do but let him down?
Sounds familiar.
Sometimes fathers
just don't get it.
He told me I only
ever think of myself.
Other times, they hit the
nail right on the head.
Come on, Fred.
I know we said we'd go
our own separate ways,
but please,
you've got to protect me.
Look, I'm sorry,
but I can't really
leave you places,
I can't really
take you places.
And I've got to go to
my sister's play tonight.
Oh, I like plays.
We should go see a play
that my sister's not in
and that my family will
not be attending.
I understand.
Just drop me off at the bus station.
I'm sure I'll be fine.
I could be one of
those street drummers,
with a bucket!
Hi. How you doing?
Good.
Who's your kid playing?
An egg.
An egg?
Yeah.
Wow, that's something.
My kid is the Easter Bunny.
The one that
makes it all happen.
All right, Dad, all the roles
are equally important.
Sure, sure.
Fred!
Please get to your seats.
The play is about to begin.
Hey, guys. Mom, Dad.
Here comes Peter Cottontail
Hopping down the bunny trail
Hippity hoppity,
Easter's on its way
Bringing every girl and boy
Baskets full of Easter joy
Ugh! What is that
dreadful sound?
Oh, no! They found me!
Run for it!
It's the Pink Berets!
Oh! Never mind, everyone.
False alarm.
Please continue with
your awful singing.
How did that
rabbit just talk?
Um...
Fred has been
studying ventriloquism.
Yeah! I might
do it professionally.
Woohoo!
You're being ridiculous.
Stop it! Sit down!
You should be
nicer to your son.
It's just a thought.
Who wants to hear a song?
We'd love to sing a song for you.
No, we wouldn't.
Stop making a fool
of yourself! Sit down!
Absolutely.
I want candy
I want candy
Take it, kids.
I know a girl
who's tough but sweet
She's so fine
she can't be beat
She's got everything I desire
He's really good!
I can see his lips move.
Sets the summer sun on fire
I want candy
I want candy!
Just the proud moms now.
I want candy
Now the grumpy dads.
I want candy
All I want is your candy
All I want is your...
Chewy
Fun to eat
So darn sweet
Candy
We're a hit!
They love us!
Here.
Are those for me?
Mmm-hmm.
Thank you. So sweet.
Alex. Good job tonight!
Wasn't she
a good Easter Bunny?
Jerk!
Oh! Hey, Dad.
I was just leaving.
Fred, seems like we made quite an
impression on you the other night.
Is this your new career?
Upstaging grade-schoolers with
your ventriloquist puppet?
No, no, I got lots of
other stuff going on.
Yeah.
There it is.
What?
That look. The complete and
utterly disappointed look.
Well, I'm sorry, Fred,
but can you give me just,
I don't know,
one reason not to
be disappointed?
Well...
Just one.
Yeah.
Fred?
Fred, where'd you go?
Yeah, I'm right here.
I just remembered I have a really
great solid lead, actually.
You do?
Yeah, a great job.
Tell me about it.
I can't really tell you about it.
But it's big.
You're going to love it.
It's really big!
Hey, what's with the "Mr.
Serious" all of a sudden?
Wait, is this where you tell me
you want to see other rabbits?
Because I'm
open-minded, Fred.
E.B., I have
the most amazing idea.
When I was a kid,
I told everyone
that I saw
the Easter Bunny, right?
No one believed me,
even though
he left me this.
This chocolate bunny,
which I kept.
Oh, dear.
And tonight, it just hit me.
I realized that it was
my destiny to see him.
Just like it was my
destiny to meet you.
It's all been
leading up to this.
Up to what?
You don't want to be
the Easter Bunny, right?
I know who can
take your place.
Who?
Me!
I'm sorry, Fred. Would you mind
repeating that in my good ear?
I want to be the Easter Bunny.
What was that for?
That is for people
who have gone loony!
A human Easter Bunny?
Come on, Fred!
It doesn't make sense.
A bunny makes no sense.
You deliver eggs.
If you wanna get all logical,
bring logic into this,
you should be
an Easter Chicken.
What? Come on.
People might resist it at first.
But, hey, change can be a good thing.
You don't want the job anyway.
The pressure is ungodly!
It did a number on me.
Do you know there was a
period of roughly nine months
where the sight of a colored
egg made me want to vomit?
And rabbits are
physically unable to vomit.
So it was just hours of...
Nothing coming out.
I don't care.
Imagine that, Fred.
Don't care.
If you can be a drummer,
I can be the Easter Bunny.
Fred, you can't just
be the Easter Bunny.
My dad has to give you
special powers. Eh.
Besides, the Easter Bunny
has got to be fit. Ow!
And you're a little scrawny.
Finally, the Easter Bunny
has got to have
lightning-fast reflexes.
Hi-ya!
Knock it off. I'm serious.
I can do this.
I will be the Bunny.
The stubborn old bunny
refuses to crown anyone else.
This can only mean
one thing, my friends.
We are going to have to take
matters into our own hands.
Um, um, um.
Carlos? Carlos?
Yes, Phil?
We don't have hands, per se-.
No, it's a figure
of speech, Phil.
Right. Got it.
Too long have we labored under the
yoke of the bunnies' tyranny.
Well, no more!
It's time for
the Easter Chick to rise!
Um, um...
Yes, Phil?
Just thinking out loud.
But wouldn't it be easier just to
wait for E.B.? I mean, he can fix this.
Phil, if you love E.B.
so much, why don't you marry him?
E.B. is gone, okay?
Oh.
There is a new boss.
Really? Who is it?
Is it me?
Are you being serious?
Yes. Hi.
Just rehearsing for the
big Easter sing-a-long.
Okay, everybody, this time
sing a lot more better.
And one, and two.
And three and four.
It's me. Me, you idiot.
I'm taking over.
Oh. I see.
But first,
I must get in shape.
I will be the Bunny.
You know,
I've been thinking, Fred.
Oh!
Hey, E.B., what's up?
Fred, listen.
You helped me become a drummer.
And how do I repay you?
I jellybean all over
your dream. Well, no. No.
I've changed me mind.
I've seen the light.
We're going to do this.
And nice job on the eggs.
I told you I was serious.
Seventy-two.
Conditioning is a must, Fred.
Seventy-three.
This is fun. Just a couple of
dudes hanging out, getting buff.
I could do this
all day!
Me, too, Fred.
I feel great.
Phil, how am I doing?
Be honest.
Next up,
speed and agility, Fred.
I want you to run so fast that you're
just a handsome blur with great hair.
Ready? Go!
Fred, that was awesome!
For a couple of seconds,
you touched greatness.
I can feel the burn!
But it's good.
it's a good burn.
Phil, too fast!
Too fast, Phil!
Sorry, sir.
Come on, Fred!
Keep hopping!
Woohoo!
That's the spirit!
The student is
becoming the master.
The Padawan is
becoming the Jedi!
The human being is
becoming the Easter Bunny.
I can feel myself
getting stronger.
Phil? How do I
look from back there?
My buttocks,
they are pretty firm, yeah?
It's a wonderful
butt, Carlos.
Si, si, I know.
That's very good,
in a crude, primitive,
offensive-to-me-personally kind of way.
What do you think?
Uh...
It's a little too
hot for the kids, no?
Very impressive!
But I can bet you can go even faster.
Way to go! Stay calm, Fred.
Dogs can smell fear.
And you have nothing
to fear but fear itself,
and this dog I'm riding on.
Wow!
Nice work, Fred.
Oh, no. Not today.
Ah!
What about Fred?
He'll be all right.
Whoa.
Hey, I know you guys.
You're the Pink Berets,
right? Ha!
E.B. said you guys were so
scary, but you're really...
You're really adorable.
Oh.
Easter Island.
Oh.
They brought me here to lead them
in all things Easter, of course!
Hello, my fellow Easter-teers.
I am truly, truly humbled
by your choice in me.
And as I stand
before you, I...
Oh.
Is this part of
the Coronation ritual?
Phuh!
Murderer!
Picking up a little
tension in the room.
Carlos!
What's going on?
Who is this person
and what's he doing here?
Wow, you're him.
The big guy. I'm Fred O'Hare.
I met you...
Well, I didn't meet you.
I saw you when I was a kid.
You look great.
Seor Bunny,
brace yourself.
This heartless human,
he has killed your son!
What? E.B.?
Did you Say "kill"?
NO, I didn't kill E.B.
Oh! Liar!
This can't be so.
Where are the Pink Berets?
Non
Wait a minute.
That's not...
Silence, human!
Can't you see you have
broken his poor old heart?
Are you kidding me?
Old friend,
I share your sorrow.
E.B. was like
your son to me.
I'm trying to
keep it together.
But don't you worry,
I will take care of Easter.
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Does anyone care
that that's a Butterball turkey?
No, no, that is E.B.
He has the same
shirt and everything.
My deepest condolences.
Attention, all bunnies.
There will be a service for E-B.
in the egg painting room.
Carrots and coffee to follow.
Carlos. What are you up to?
It's called
a coup d'tat.
Which is French
for coup d'tat!
But, Carlos.
You've been my most trusted
number two for years.
Guess what? I am sick
of doing number two.
It is our time
for number one!
Yeah? We the bosses now.
All hail Carlos!
We the bosses!
We the bosses! Woohoo!
Pink Berets!
Seize him!
Woohoo!
Hey! Don't do that.
He's a beloved holiday icon!
No!
You can do this.
You are the world's best rabbit drummer.
You are a superstar.
You are a jerk
for abandoning Fred.
Hey, I don't need that
kind of voice in my head!
Yeah, well, you should have thought
of that before you abandoned Fred.
Look, you better tell me
something positive about me.
I can't. You abandoned Fred.
Oh! Hello, who is
this gorgeous devil?
Is Eb in here, please?
Eb?
It's "E.B." That's me.
Oh, all right, well, E.B.
, you're wanted on stage in two minutes.
Welcome to Hoff Knows Talent.
You guys look great- There are all
kinds of exciting acts tonight-
There he is.
How's my little guy?
Actually, David Hasselhoff,
I've got a problem.
Hmm.
Is it the jitters?
Believe me, even I used to get them.
Now, I find a good way...
No, it's not
the jitters, David.
I'm starting to realize I might
be a really selfish rabbit.
Look, I love drumming.
But when my
friend needed me most,
I left him in a house full of
highly trained ninja bunnies.
What am I going to do?
Hmm.
A dilemma as old
as time itself.
I know that if I left right
now, I'd be giving up fame.
And untold riches.
And untold riches.
And all the bunnies
you could ever want.
Yes, and all the...
You're not really
helping much, David.
Like, at all!
And Fred could be
in real trouble.
Go to him.
Go to him.
Give it up for Mr.
David Hasselhoff!
It's The Hoff#
Fred?
Anybody home?
Fred?
Uh-Oh.
The Easter moon
is on the rise.
At midnight,
her radiant beams will fill up
the Egg of Destiny with magic.
Then, at last, Senor Bunny,
I will be Easter's new king!
Carlos, I'm
warning you!
The Egg of Destiny is too dangerous
in the hands of a chick.
Its power can only
be wielded by a bunny.
Oh, yes? Well, look at me wielding.
I'm wielding!
Ooh-ooh. I'm wielding
it again. Okay?
Oh, Carlos, can I wield
the Egg of Destiny? Please?
No.
Can I at least touch it?
OW!
There, you touched it.
That was harsh.
But, Carlos,
think of the children.
Yes, but I am! The childrens.
They don't want
candy and chocolate.
From now on,
their baskets will be filled with
clumps of bird seed, dried crickets,
and the world's finest worms!
Mmm! Mmm! Mmm!
Mmm!
Have you
completely lost your mind?
Silence! You see,
this is why he must go.
It's this lousy attitude
of his. Well, no more!
The more sensitive chicks in the
room may want to avert their eyes.
What about
a compromise, okay?
The bunny gets Easter one year
and the chick gets it the next.
Enough of the chitty-chatty.
Bye-bye, Easter Bunny.
Hello! Hey, everyone.
I'm back. Yep, it was all a
big mistake, but I'm alive.
Hey, Larry, Kyle,
what are you doing in there?
E.B.! You're alive!
E.B.!
Dad? Fred? What's going on?
Gummy cannons! In position.
Fire at will!
That hurt!
Put him on the belt, boys.
Dice him, slice him, and pulverize him!
That is a bit excessive.
Oh, no! E.B.!
Son!
The reign of
the bunny is over!
Oh!
Somebody help!
Help us!
What are you doing? Don't worry, Dad, Fred.
I'll be right there.
To the Egg Sleigh!
And step on it!
Are these ropes made
of black licorice?
Yes, yes, they are.
Horrible stuff!
We can eat through them.
I suppose you can.
You see, my friends?
It is just like I told you, no?
Oh, tonight is going to
be a very big night!
I'm flying!
Without even
flapping my tiny wings.
Everything is
coming up Carlos!
Got it!
Good man, Fred.
Hop on.
All right. Let's go!
I'm starting to get a sense
of impending doom now.
Ow!
No!
I made it!
All right. Here we go!
Come on, Fred!
Whoa!
Look, Fred! There he is.
it's E.B.! E.B.!
The Egg Sleigh!
You've got to stop Carlos!
Don't worry, Dad!
I'm on it!
The power is
surging through my veins!
It's good to be the king.
En?
What is happening to me?
Uh-Oh.
Whoa!
Come on out, Carlos.
It ends here!
You think you can
just take over Easter?
Well, guess what?
I actually think
you're on to something.
You're a bright man,
you're an innovator.
I like it.
Give it a whirl.
One second. Hey!
You finish?
Um... Not quite.
Take that!
Get off!
Whoa!
Incoming!
Why?
Bunny slam!
OW!
You father was a fool to think you
would ever amount to anything.
Here comes
Carlos Yellowtail
Hopping down the chicky trail
Easter is coming your way
Okay, Phil,
initiate take-off procedures.
Aye-aye, Captain!
Chicks, fall in!
Attention!
Here we go.
Right naps!
Left flaps!
Okay, we're good to go!
Let's go, Phil.
Easter is waiting.
Righty-o.
Uh-Oh.
Oh, boy.
Phil, let's get
this bird in the air!
Yeah!
Phil!
Knock off the dancing!
Yes, sir. Sorry.
Lifting off!
No way! The show is not over.
Phil!
What are you doing?
Fly us straight!
No, no, Phil!
Knock it off!
Keep her level!
NO, Phil.
Phil! Phil!
Phil! Please, Phil!
Phil!
Phil, I'm feeling a little...
Will you please stop dancing?
Phil!
Woohoo!
Yeah, that's right!
This is not over!
Ah-ha!
Thank you very much.
Dad!
E.B.!
I was so worried, Son.
I'm so sorry for
all the things I said.
Me, too, Dad.
And your friend, here.
He saved my life.
He was magnificent!
Well, I...
I kind of was.
Hey, thanks, Fred.
Well, Easter's in a few hours.
I have to get going.
What?
Dad, I'm ready.
But, E.B.,
what about your dream?
I'm still going to
be a drummer, Dad.
But I can be
the Easter Bunny, too.
There's just one thing.
All right, then.
Fredrick O'Hare.
Yes, Sir.
Please step forward.
Down on one knee.
Left or right,
doesn't matter.
And now, place your forefinger
on the Egg of Destiny.
Oh...
EB., you as well.
By the power vested in me,
I pronounce E.B.
and Fred O'Hare
co-Easter Bunnies.
Hear, hear!
Wow!
Now go forth and deliver!
Woohoo!
Wonderful brunch, Bonnie.
Thank you, dear.
It is delicious.
Totally agree.
This is amazing, Mom.
You should open a restaurant.
I'm serious.
That is a very nice
thing to say, Fred.
And can I say that
I love your costume?
I think it is so cheerful.
Thanks, Mom.
But it's a uniform.
I'm so tired.
Yeah, you were up very late
delivering pizzas.
Easter baskets.
Every time you say "Easter
baskets," I hear "pizza. "
It just helps me cope.
Guys,
can we not do this today?
Oh, they're here.
This is exciting.
That is my
co-Easter Bunny.
Hey, why don't you guys come see me off?
It'll be fun.
Well, that's weird.
Who do you think it is?
I don't know.
Wow.
Fred.
Fred, wait.
This is
amazing!
I know, right?
It's pretty cool, huh?
I'm sorry I gave
you such a hard time.
Aw, Dad, come on.
You don't have to...
I'm proud of you.
Thanks, Dad.
Easter Bunny.
Wow!
The one who
makes it all happen.
Say the words, Fred.
Bring it home.
Happy Easter to all!
And to all, a good mid-to-late morning.
On Cheepers! On Peepers!
On Biscuit and Buzzy!
On Chucky! On Clucky!
On Feathers and Carlos.
Yeah, come on, Carlos.
Put your back into it.
I've been flapping all night, so
just cut me some slacks, okay?
One little coup and suddenly
I'm everybody's chump.
Fred, what did she say?
Was that about me?
You speak Chinese? Just when I
think I can't love you any more...
the many noble rabbits
who have served as
the Easter Bunny.
If you've ever
gotten a basket of candy
and colored eggs
on Easter morning,
you have them to thank.
Yes, even that guy.
See, every bunny dreams of holding the
title, but not just anyone can do it.
You have to be majestic.
You have to be dignified.
You have to be, well, a bunny.
Or, at least you did.
Hi. I'm Fred O'Hare,
the first human Easter Bunny.
Sounds insane, you say?
It'll make sense once you know
how it all went down.
E.B.?
E.B.?
Where are you?
Hi, Dad!
Woohoo!
Oh! There you are.
Son! I was thinking.
You are getting so big, you're
practically a foot tall.
Over a foot,
if you count the ears.
I always
count the ears.
So, how would you like to
go to work with me today?
Would I?
That sounds awesome.
I said the same thing when my father
first took me to the factory.
I didn't use the word "awesome," but...
Down, please.
Thank you. Go ahead, Son.
Take a look.
Whoa!
Look at all that candy.
Come on, come on.
See you.
This is so cool!
Oh, careful! E.B., welcome
to the Easter Factory.
This is where we make
all the candy and eggs
that I deliver to
the children of the world.
It's pretty impressive,
isn't it?
It's amazing, Dad!
I'm glad you like it, because
someday this will all be yours.
Really?
Now, come on, Son.
There's so much to see.
Daddy, what do you
call that thingamajig?
Ah, the Marshmallow
Chick Machine.
Loved them since
I was your age.
When your grand-dad,
the Easter Bunny before me,
took me on this
very same tour...
Hello.
Hello, little bunny.
What are you doing?
We don't eat the candy.
We make the candy!
But I thought...
E.B.
This is my second-in-command,
Carlos.
It's fine, Carlos. E.B. was, uh,
taste-testing.Isn't that right, Son?
Yup, I'm taste-testing.
It's great.
Oh, dear me. No, no.
Son, we're going to have
to work on your taste.
Carlos, too much marsh,
not enough mellow.
Exactly, seor, I was
just going to say that.
Phil! Too much marsh,
not enough mallow!
Phil! Phil!
Phil!
Hi, boss.
No dancing on the job!
It's forbidden.
Yes, sir. I'm very bad.
I am so sorry, seor.
I will deal with this personally.
Yes. Easter is right
around the corner, Carlos.
There is no room for error.
Si, seor.
Remember this, E.B.,
we can't make any mistakes.
The entire world
is counting on us.
This seems hard, Dad.
And I don't know if I can do it.
Oh, come now.
Don't you worry, Son.
Yes, it's a big responsibility,
but you'll be ready.
You'll have to be.
Why, in a few years you will
pick up the Egg of Destiny
and receive the magical powers
of the Easter Bunny.
Now, let's move on.
Bye, Carlos.
Okay, ciao.
See you later.
Enjoy your life of privilege,
little bunny.
So, how are
my kids doing?
I had rehearsals for
the Easter play today.
Oh.
They usually cast
a boy as Peter Cottontail,
but they made
an exception for me
on account of my
singing voice is so strong.
That's great, honey.
Sam, how about you?
Well, I'm up for
a big promotion at work.
Really? That's terrific.
Good to hear that two of my
kids are working so hard.
So, Fred. How did
that job interview go?
I don't know
about that place, Dad.
I just don't know if it's
really what I'm looking for.
Really?
Did they pay money?
Then it's exactly
what you've been looking for.
Well, that's just crass.
What are you nodding for?
"Dear Fred, as your mother
I have always loved you,
"and it hurts me
to have to tell you
"in this way,
but there comes a time
"when every young man must
grow up and leave the nest. "
You all prepared statements?
Fred, we're just doing this
because we love you, Son.
The Sadeki family
down the street went
through the same thing
with their son Jordy.
He just laid on the couch all
day watching court shows,
but then they had
an intervention,
and now he works in a pharmacy,
and has an apartment.
I don't really want
to work at a pharmacy, Mom.
Well, you need to do something.
You need to get a life.
You need to get a job
and you need to move out.
Especially that last one.
But I did move out.
And I had a job.
Is it my fault
the company downsized?
Fred, that was
over a year ago!
You have to get
back on the horse.
And you have so
much potential.
Thanks, Mom.
Sometimes I
think you adopted me
because Fred was
such a disappointment.
Wow.
Alex, that is
a very hurtful statement.
You're not denying it.
Eat your dinner.
Mom, Dad, I'm trying, okay?
I go on job interviews. I had one today!
Yes, but it wasn't what you were
looking for. It's always something.
You didn't like the commute.
The parking lot was too far
away from the building.
The man in the cubicle
next to you smelled.
He smelled.
Fred,
nothing is ever
good enough for you.
You don't want me
to settle, do you?
Settling is fine.
Dad, when I was a kid,
you said that when I grew up I
was going to do something great.
Yes. But now I'm telling you that
you should forget about "great,"
and settle for
getting any job.
We should have nudged you out
of the nest a long time ago.
Baby birds get a nudge.
Giant birds who never leave,
they get shoved.
E.B.!
E.B.!
Hello, Dad.
So, what do you think?
Uh, what did I...
It was great! Really kicking.
But, E.B., shouldn't you be
rehearsing your speech?
You're about to be
crowned the Easter Bunny
in front of
Uh, yeah, about that.
Yes?
LOOK, Dad,
ever since I was
yea big, it's been,
"The Easter Bunny
wouldn't do that" and
"The Easter Bunny
has to be perfect. "
But I'm not perfect.
I know that, Son.
But you'll get there, eventually.
But I'm...
Listen.
You want me to be this.
But maybe I'm not this.
Just maybe, maybe I'm this.
A Sock?
Ugh. "
Yeah, that's right.
I might be a metaphorical sock.
I might not be
a good enough egg,
but I might be
the best sock ever.
I might not cut it
delivering Easter baskets,
but I might be
great at something else.
Oh, the drums!
Why, I think that's fine.
I think it's really nice that you have
a hobby. Everyone should have a hobby.
It's not a hobby, Dad.
I want to drum in a band.
I want to see the world.
E.B., the Easter
Bunny sees the world.
Every country in one night,
making people of the world happy.
Really, Dad?
The whole world?
What about China?
No!
Look, it's candy, woman!
Madam, please.
All right. So,
we haven't cracked China yet.
But, for all those that do
believe, you will be there.
No, Dad. I don't want
to be the Easter Bunny.
Now, listen to me.
Four thousand years of
tradition doesn't end
just because one selfish bunny
doesn't feel like doing it.
Look. Dad...
No, E.B., you look!
You are going to
be the Easter Bunny!
Now you need to get it together,
get rid of these drums,
and get your
priorities straight!
I'll see you out there!
No, I don't think you will.
Destination.
Where dreams come true.
In-flight snack preference.
Any baggage?
Just emotional.
I'm sorry, Dad.
OW!
I did it.
Hollywood.
Right. First order of business,
find a place to stay.
Perfect.
Fred, wait, wait, wait! Fred.
Did you know
about this, Sam?
Oh, uh...
You did.
Okay, look.
The rules of this
intervention state
that I am not
supposed to help you, okay?
So you can't tell anyone
what I'm about to do.
No! I'm not going to
take money from you.
Wasn't going to
give you money.
We can call it a loan.
Fred, look,
I got you a job interview
tomorrow at my friend's company.
I'm a little
slammed tomorrow.
I know you're not.
I'm pretty busy.
No.
Look, it's an
entry-level position.
Entry-level?
At a video game company!
Okay. That's kind of cool.
I know.
All right, look, if it means
that much to you, I'll swing by.
No, Fred.
You don't "swing by. " Okay?
You shower, you shave, and you show up.
The three "shs. "
Come on, Fred. You've
got to start your life.
Think of this as a reboot.
Right!
It's time.
Yeah. You know what?
You're right.
In a couple of months,
couple of weeks,
you're gonna see
a whole new Fred.
Yeah. By Easter.
Easter is in two weeks.
By Easter, I'm going to have a new
job, a new place, a new life.
Great!
Okay.
Now if you'll excuse me,
I'm going to go
sleep in my car.
Fred, listen.
My boss is on vacation for a few
weeks and he asked me to house-sit.
Nobody ever asks
me to house-sit.
I know.
It's so weird.
Anyway, he has dogs,
and you know I'm scared of
dogs, so take over for me.
Wait. Your boss lives in
a big mansion, right?
Yes, in Beverly Hills.
And he loves his house
more than he loves his kids.
So you have
to behave. Okay?
Do not touch anything.
Do not break anything.
Do not go upstairs!
Wait, what's upstairs?
Fred.
Okay.
And do not forget
to feed the dogs.
Got it!
Thank you, Sam.
You're welcome.
I put the address
on the paper.
Okay.
But, Fred?
Yeah?
If you screw up,
I'll kill you.
Okay.
Listen to me. This is the Playboy
Mansion. it's not a hotel.
Yeah, right.
But it says here
that ever since 1971,
the Playboy
Mansion has been home
to sexy bunnies
from around the world.
Friend, I can't see you.
Please step forward.
Now, I'm telling you that I am
both a bunny, and incredibly sexy.
I don't have time for this.
Hello? Hello?
Maybe this is the rags part
of my rags-to-riches story.
All right, let's see here.
Whoa!
Look at this!
Hello, Fred's new crib.
Maybe this is
a good thing.
All great artists suffer
before they become famous.
That lady wrote
Harry Potter in a ditch.
But it's the hunger,
loneliness
and exhaustion
that gets you really.
How could this
night get any worse?
I see.
Car accident. Thank you!
OW!
Why?
Oh, ow!
It's still alive.
I've got to help him out.
This will do.
Don't you worry,
little friend.
I'm going to end
your suffering.
No!
Who said that?
Well, who do
you think said it?
Your latest victim.
You know what? We can leave the
insurance companies out of this.
I could just, maybe, come live
with you for a couple of months.
No, no, no!
Not real. Not real. Not real.
Excuse me?
You left your car back there,
with the lights on.
I'm just saying!
Say something. Talk again.
I'm E.B. And you are?
I'm Fred.
Well, Fred, I am so hungry.
Have you got anything
in the old snack department?
Okay.
Here you go.
Oh! Oh! That's.. -
What is this?
What? It's Turkey Jerky.
First, you hit me with your car,
and then you try and poison me
with a meat stick.
Why do you hate me?
Okay. Is there something you'd
rather eat, you weird little thing?
Well...
Carrots!
He's a genius.
One carrot. Okay.
Time to hop away out of Fred's
life back to the Enchanted Forest.
You're kicking me out?
Yeah. it's a bad time.
Yeah. Did some jerk
just hit you with his car?
That kind of bad time?
No, I'll tell you what.
It's fine.
Oh, me leg. OW.
I mean,
you can't be expected to help
every innocent
creature you wound.
And I'm sorry if I dented your
bumper with my face and body.
Do you want me to look
for some baby aspirin?
No, no! You save it.
You might run over a baby.
Just pray that sweet messenger
of death visits quickly.
Is that the icy hand now?
Okay, wait!
On the off-chance that you're really
here and I'm not completely crazy,
and I did run you
over and you're hurt...
I guess you can stay.
Thanks, mate. And I could bunk
down anywhere. Seriously.
West wing, master suite,
guest bedroom. I'm not picky.
Right. Okay.
What's this space, then?
This is a place for you
to stay for the night.
I'm not a car.
So why would I need to stay here?
Look, it's not my house.
I'm not even allowed to go
upstairs, and I'm human.
Sorry. What are
the newspapers for?
Because I'm not really a
voracious reader or anything.
You know, you're an animal.
So, we all know animals...
I understand.
I'll just sleep down here,
among my poo and
pee like a pig.
If you like,
you use it as well.
Sorry.
No, don't reproach yourself
for these medieval conditions.
Yeah, whatever.
I'm going to go to bed where,
hopefully, I've been all along.
So, good night.
Oh, okay,
I'll just stay here then.
By myself.
In the dark.
With the door closed.
Seor. Seor
I have news.
Operations are
running at full capacity.
With my supervision, we are
right on target for Easter.
Fine, fine.
But is there any report on my son?
Yes, I have the report.
The sun will be shining,
foggy times are lifting.
Easter will be
clear sailing, seor.
Not the sun.
My son, E.B.!
That son.
Yes. I almost forget.
The rabbit hole was used for an unscheduled
trip earlier this evening, sir!
What? You mean he ran away?
And at the height
of our busiest time.
It's almost unforgivable.
But how could he just take off like this?
It's just not like him.
Please, seor.
Don't be too rash.
It's way too
early to disown him.
But I wasn't going to...
Wait a minute. Are you hopping?
Am I? I didn't notice.
It just comes
so naturally.
Anyway, seor considering your
obvious distraction with this,
wouldn't it be wise to pass the mantle
to, I don't know, somebody else?
Hmm.
Let's see. It would have
to be someone you trust.
Someone who is
comfortable giving orders.
Phil! Keep doing that,
but do it faster!
Faster. Gotcha.
And stop dancing!
No dancing. Yes, sir.
Carlos, you're right.
I'm totally right.
Assemble
the Pink Berets at once!
I'm sorry. What?
We need to find E.B.
The Pink Berets?
But they're only to be used in a
situation of extreme emergency.
This is pretty extreme, Carlos.
The Pink Berets will find E.B.
They have to!
You can't ignore me
forever, Senor Bunny.
Freeze!
Who's there? Is this the same guy?
Don't make me come down there.
to an overturned tractor trailer
at the Burbank entrance.
Weather is
a cool 72 degrees...
Rabbit.
Hello?
Talking rabbit?
Okay. Wow.
Dude, you are stressed.
Hi, Fred O'Hare.
Hey, Fred O'Hare.
Nice to meet you.
I'm Fred O'Hare.
You need me for this job.
You're going to
hire me for this job.
Oh! The dogs. Right.
"Sam, until Daisy and Baby
are accustomed to you,
"please wear the safety suit in the
hall closet when you feed them. "
Safety suit?
Daisy! Baby! Come here.
Let's go.
I'm on a schedule here.
Oh!
No!
No! Heel! Sit! Sit!
That's fine.
Okay, it's all good.
No, no, no!
Look, Fred!
Can you believe it?
They've got
a drum kit in here.
What do you think?
Never had one formal lesson!
I am the Extreme Rock Master!
I know what
you're thinking.
No, you really don't.
Hey, Fred, what's wrong?
You look a bit put out.
Why are you still here?
You can't be up here.
You're in the forbidden part of the house.
Yeah, but so are you.
Pick this up, man.
You've destroyed the place!
I wouldn't say, "destroyed.
" I was just getting comfortable.
What about your injury? Huh?
Your leg? You're hurt, right?
Yeah, exactly. I needed a soft
bed in which to convalesce.
Oh, I see. So, you climbed
a flight of stairs...
Struggled up each stair is more like it.
Worth it, though.
That Jacuzzi
loosened me right up.
Jacuzzi?
Oh, yeah. You might
want to turn it off.
It was creating
a lot of bubbles.
No!
My sister is
going to kill me!
Don't worry.
We'll clean it up together,
as soon as I've
beat my high score.
Hey, Fred! Come on, your turn.
Pick up a guitar, mate.
Fred, I think
we got off on the wrong foot.
You said some things,
I flooded some things.
Let's start over again.
Fred? Why am I in a box?
This seems like the sort of
thing a serial killer might do.
Is this going
to be a surprise?
All right,
come on. Out.
Oh! Are we
going for a hike?
Better! We're
releasing you into the wild.
The wild?
Oh, no, no, no. I'll just
stay with you, I think.
This place seems to be
dominated by carnivores
Get out. Let's go.
What are you doing?
You're going to leave me here?
Yeah, there's lots of rabbits out here.
You'll feel right at home.
Fred, are we locked in
a destructive relationship?
Get out. Fred.
You're making a scene!
Get out!
Move along.
Look, Fred.
Goodbye!
But I want to stay with you!
Fred, please don't go.
I'm already late. So go away.
Come on, man.
Fred, mate.
I'll behave.
I'll clean up my mess.
I'll do the dishes.
Not your problem.
There are no dishes in the wild.
No. Fred.
But I'm special.
Well, we're all special.
You're not getting it.
I don't mean special as in,
"everybody's special. "
I mean, I'm really special.
What're you doing?
See?
Jelly beans?
Mmm-hmm.
So what? So you talk
and you poop candy.
Could you do it in
someone else's life?
No, you're right.
It's not your concern.
And in two weeks, maybe you can
explain to the children of the world
why they didn't get
their Easter baskets.
Easter?
What, Easter?
No way.
Yes, Fred.
I am the Easter Bunny.
Hop in.
Yes! I knew it! I knew it.
I knew you were real. I knew it!
What are you talking about?
Of course I'm real.
No.
When I was a kid,
I saw you on Easter morning.
You did?
Yeah.
That was you,
right?
Absolutely. No question.
Okay. Because you do look a
little different. Was it...
I don't know, have you lost weight?
Or maybe it's the clothes.
You're talking
about the old guy.
Yeah. We got rid of him.
He didn't understand children. Ah.
He didn't get that children
sometimes just want to drum.
I mean, dream.
Sometimes they just want to dream.
Children dream.
Yeah. So he had to go,
anyway, this guy. Right.
Well, it's a good thing
you got rid of him, then.
Exactly.
So... Wait a minute.
Why are you here now?
Just doing a little last minute
recon for Easter deliveries.
Finding ideal egg hiding locations.
There is one. That's perfect!
Compiling a list of kids
with chocolate allergies.
That kind of thing.
it's all very technical.
I see.
Okay.
Oh, man. I'm really late.
Late for what?
What are we doing?
I have a job interview.
You're staying here.
But here is boring. Let me come with you.
I could be a job reference.
Thank you, I appreciate that.
Look, I really need this job,
and I don't think anyone there is
going to be able to handle you.
I'm not sure I can handle you.
So, just do me a favor? Wait in the car.
Fred, I don't want
to get your hopes up,
but I think you're definitely
going to get this job.
Be good.
Yes, sir.
I'll stay here and
guard the vehicle.
Yes, sir. I'll put
you through to Mr. Hill.
Hi, I'm Fred O'Hare.
I'm here for a 10:30 with
Mrs. Beck.
You're a half-hour late.
I know. I called.
That doesn't make
you any earlier.
Uh-huh.
You know, you're the first impression
people get when they walk in here.
In many ways, you are the
face of the company.
Fill this Out.
Yes, ma'am.
Yes, sir. Can I help you?
What is that alarming noise?
Oh, no!
Pink Berets!
I'm sorry, sir.
Who did you want to speak to?
Fred.
What are you doing here?
I told you to wait in the car!
This is serious.
I really need your help!
I need your help! You can't be here.
You've got to go!
Fred?
Yes.
Get me out of here!
Ah!
Mrs. Beck.
Yes.
How are you?
I'm well. I can't say that I'm that
impressed with your punctuality, though.
Yeah, I have
half a dozen excuses.
But I'm just going to go
with a straight apology.
I'm really, really sorry.
Okay. Clean slate, then.
Thank you.
So, let's begin, Fred.
I'll show you inside.
Whoa!
So, recent
employment history.
You haven't
worked in a year?
Yeah, my parents
have moved in with me.
That has sort of been a full-time job.
Mmm-hmm.
It's fine. It just gets in the
way of writing my novel, is all.
You're writing a novel?
What is that about?
It's about a crippled soldier who, in
the future, goes to another planet
and he becomes
one of the indigenous people
who are blue and
live in the forest.
That's not Avatar?
Not really.
So, why don't
we take a walk
and I can tell you a little
bit about the company?
Okay.
So, the good news is, we
tend to promote from within.
But you'd be
starting in the mailroom.
Mailroom.
Is that a problem?
No, no, I love mail.
I get lots of mail.
E- mail,
snail mail, chain mail.
I am male.
Speaking of mail, that's Cody.
Let me introduce you to him.
He is being promoted to junior exec
and you would be replacing him.
Wow. Congratulations.
Question.
I need 30 copies of something,
collated, stapled, bound
and on my desk
by yesterday.
What do you do?
I would make 30 copies, and I
would do what you said with them.
I smell potential.
Oh, Mrs. Beck, I was wanting
to talk to you about my lunch.
Fred. Fred!
What is wrong with you?
This is
an extreme emergency.
You're ruining this for me.
You really need to go.
You're right.
I'll create a diversion
and we'll escape in
the ensuing chaos.
E.B., no! Get back here!
Fred?
Yeah.
I got a good feeling about this place.
Where to next?
Sounding good to me.
But where is Ricky?
We need to put
a back beat behind that.
A back beat.
I think Ricky
went out for coffee.
I guess he's back.
How you feeling, Ricky?
Yeah, I'm smashing.
I mean, I'm fine.
I'm just fine, daddy-o.
Well, then let's do it.
Okay, so this our sport...
Oh.
This is our sports-game
motion-capture studio.
Mmm-hmm.
In here?
Yeah.
Ah!
Hockey.
It's golf.
And this is our sound recording
studio for our music games.
We've done Extreme Rock
Master; Extreme Jazz Master;
and now we're doing
Extreme Blues Master.
Sounds like a cool idea.
Whoa,
you got the Blind Boys of...
Quit it!
I'm going to kill you so bad! Get out!
Okay, Fred,
let's try and keep moving...
I'm all of a sudden not
feeling so good. Oh.
Do you have a restroom?
Yeah.
Where is that?
That was brilliant!
I mean, that was tight.
Sounded all right.
But I know my drummer when I hear him.
So, who are you, boy?
Okay, I admit it. I'm not a blues man.
My name is E.B.
I'm just some
guy off the street
with two sticks of
wood and a dream.
I understand if
you throw me out.
I get it if you don't
want to give me a break.
Hey, slow down, friend.
You know, we have a buddy who is
always on the lookout for new talent.
And the man is a genius.
He is the godfather of entertainment.
And he's having
auditions tomorrow.
The Hoff?
You mean he can help me?
If he like you.
Wow. Thanks, Blind Boys.
Good luck, little rabbit.
Wait,
how did you know I was...
Mmm!
Clever gents.
So, Fred, how'd it go?
Don't say a word.
Can I get a little
clarification, here?
Is this what
the Easter Bunny does now?
He just goes house to house,
messing up people's lives?
Well, that
is just hurtful.
Besides, you're
selling yourself short.
They were going to
shove you in the mail room.
Well, excuse me, but I happen to
think you're better than that.
You don't Know me, okay?
We just met.
I can tell. You give off this
aura of untapped potential.
I do?
Don't pull that with me, rabbit, okay?
I'm too smart for you.
But, Fred, I'm serious.
You're destined to do something great.
I just know it.
I've heard that one before.
You'll find an awesome job.
Hey. Look, what about this?
Dog walker?
No.
TSA Officer?
No.
What about this one?
It looks exciting.
Wind in your hair,
hot babe on your arm.
That's a car ad.
You should buy that car, then.
Ah! Seor.
How you doing, jefe?
Am I disturbing?
It's never been
this quiet in here.
Yeah, it's so depressing.
You should clear this out.
Make a new den or a clubhouse.
Like a man-cave!
It'll be fun.
I called his
dreams ridiculous.
What kind of
father does that?
No, no, seor.
I will not permit you
to beat yourself up over this.
Anybody would be lucky
to have a father such as you.
Thank you, Carlos.
I miss him.
Me, too, seor.
A son is very
difficult to replace.
Difficult, but
not impossible.
Carlos...
What the...
What's that on your head?
What? My new earmuffs?
It's a cold spring
this year, you know? Brr!
Oh.
Anyway, what am I going to do?
I know,
how can you deliver Easter
with this tremendous burden
on your old, frail shoulders?
Hey, hey, hey, easy
with the "old. "
No, I'm just saying,
like, compared to me.
Surely you're not thinking
of making the trip yourself?
What choice
do we have?
We can improvise. I mean...
Does it even have to be a bunny?
What?
I suppose,
given these troubled times,
even a humble
chick could do the job.
Really, Carlos.
Wow. I mean,
that is funny.
Can you imagine that?
A chick delivering Easter?
That's ridiculous.
Oh, dear me.
But I appreciate you trying
to cheer me up, though.
Please. It is my pleasure
to amuse you, seor.
A chick delivering...
Fred, I was wondering if...
Are you doing
anything tomorrow?
Tomorrow I get to start my new
job at the video game company.
Wait a second.
No, that didn't work out.
I know. I know.
I'm sorry about that.
But do you know what?
Every cloud has a silver lining.
And behold this
silver lining, Fred!
The Hoff?
Yes, please.
I just need a ride.
Mmm.
No.
Come on, Fred.
This is my one big chance.
I'll do anything.
Even get out of your life.
I take you to Hoff Knows Talent,
and that's it, we're done.
Bunny's honor.
Right here, mate.
It's okay.
A verbal agreement is fine.
Now, you realize,
you can't talk.
No. I can.
No, what I mean is,
you shouldn't talk.
What? Like, ever?
Yeah,
"ever" would be wonderful.
But from now on, especially
not in front of other people.
They might freak out and
want to dissect your brain.
Dissect? That's
a bit extreme.
There's an easy explanation
as to why I can talk.
It's a simple combination
of cuteness and magic.
Okay. Here we go. One BLT.
And one order of carrot cake a
la mode, topped with, quote,
Whatever candy you have laying
around back there. Unquote.
Uh, excuse me.
Is that a cough drop?
Yeah. it's cherry.
It counts.
It's a peculiar garnish.
Can I get some
chocolate syrup?
Sure, doll.
Thanks, love.
It seems my brain is
still intact, Fred.
Fred,
I've just had an idea.
When I'm a famous rock star, I'm going
to buy a mansion just like this
and make you sleep in the garage
in a topsy-turvy switcheroo.
What do you think?
Oh, man. My sister is here.
You never told me
you had a sister.
There's still so much we don't
Know about each other, Fred.
If she goes upstairs,
I'm dead.
Why?
why?
Let me take you
back to this morning
when you flooded the bathroom
and you trashed the bedroom.
You remember that?
Fred, leave this to me.
I'll smooth it out with her. Ow!
Hey!
Look at me.
One word out of you, and it's
rabbit season. You got it?
Okay, I'm going to
run interference.
I need you to sneak upstairs
and clean up, quietly!
Sam!
Hi!
Hey, it's not a good time for me right now.
I was just leaving.
But you just got here.
I know, right?
Hey, what are these?
Oh!
There you are.
Mmm!
I'm on this North Beach diet.
It's carrots only.
That is why they're
all over the house.
I was going to
clean them up, though.
Okay, Fred, how did the
interview go? Yes?
Oh! Thank you for asking.
Amazing! I aced it.
Really?
Yeah.
No way!
Why are you so surprised?
Fred, that's awesome!
Place could use me, too.
Don't get me wrong, it was great.
It was good.
It was all right.
I just... I don't know if it was for me,
really. It just didn't gel.
Something felt a little off
about the whole thing.
I didn't get it.
Oh! What? What happened?
It's kind of hard to pinpoint
any one specific thing.
Oh, Fred.
I know. I know. I'm sorry.
What is that?
I wouldn't know because I'm
not allowed to go up there.
And I haven't
been up there once.
Hmm. Okay.
Sam, no, you're not allowed up
there, either. Don't go up there!
Sam, I'm begging you!
I can explain.
Oh, my God!
Look at this.
Look how cute this
stuffed bunny is!
Wow! Yeah. Oh.
So cute!
Isn't he?
Yeah, you know what?
Maybe we shouldn't be playing with him
because we're not really supposed to
be up here in the first place. So...
He's just so lifelike.
You think?
It's a little
freaky-looking to me.
Oh! Oh, he's so soft!
And cute, and cuddly,
and warm.
Okay!
Why don't we put him back before
things get uncomfortable?
No, I'm not uncomfortable.
Well, I'm uncomfortable because
I'm looking after the house
and it's my responsibility.
There we are.
All right.
Oh, my God!
Wow! Look at that.
He's a wind-up toy.
That is so adorable!
Yeah, I think
he might be broken.
Yeah, you're a broken
little guy, aren't you?
Hey... Ow!
Fred, I am really
worried about you.
Hmm!
Don't eat that.
You might not like the flavor.
Fred, relax.
Watermelon.
Can we go?
Look, Sam, I don't want you to worry, okay?
I'll get something.
Look, Fred, I just thought it would
make tomorrow night a lot easier
if you could tell Mom and Dad
that you had a job.
Whoa! What's
tomorrow night?
Alex's play! The one she's
been talking about for weeks.
Oh, that is easy.
I'm not going.
Oh, yeah, you are.
Fred, come on, she's your sister.
All right.
Wear something nice.
I'll wear something nice.
Don't forget, I love you.
I love you.
Put gas in your car. 7:00.
Bye.
Nice. Is she
seeing anyone?
No, she's single, and she's
looking for a rabbit.
Wow! There's a lot
of people here, Fred.
Way more than I imagined.
You nervous?
Well, a little.
It's just...
I'm starting to
feel a bit sick, Fred.
I've never actually played
in front of anybody.
Come on. This could be
your big opportunity.
I know it's my big chance,
but what if I blow it?
Relax. I'll give you
a good intro.
I'll set you up,
you knock them down.
Yeah?
Yeah.
Really?
Mmm-hmm.
Thank you, Fred.
No problem.
Now, if you could please remove
your claws from my shoulder.
Sorry about that.
That's my nerves.
Thanks.
Thank you.
Next.
Next.
Next.
Next.
Mr. Hasselhoff.
Yes.
May I call you The Hoff?
Yes.
Fantastic.
Sir, I realize that
you have seen it all.
But this...
This will stretch the limits
of even your vast experience.
What you're about to
see will mystify you.
It will challenge
the very scope...
Cut to the chase, my friend.
Okay. Uh...
I give you E.B.
Come on, let's drum.
Stop! Stop!
Stop, stop.
I don't want to hear anymore.
Come on! Mr. Hoff, we've been
waiting all day. Give the guy a chance.
I gave him a chance.
I didn't like it.
I loved it!
Woohoo!
Yes!
Hoff knows talent,
and that rabbit's got talent!
Thank you, David Hasselhoff!
I will not let you down.
This is a golden opportunity and
one I intend to realize fully!
Hey, wait.
You're not surprised
that I'm a talking rabbit.
Little man, my best
friend's a talking car.
Can you make it to a live taping
of the show Saturday night?
I'll send a limo.
Did you hear him?
Did you hear The Hoff?
I'm on my way, Fred!
It sounds like
The Hoff really dug you.
I mean, he is a good actor,
but I think he was sincere.
Thanks, mate. And don't think
I've forgotten our deal.
You've done your part.
And now I'm ready to
get out of your life.
Good. Yeah, good.
We've had some good times, eh?
Haven't we, Fred?
Yeah, there were a few.
You validated my
whole childhood dream.
And then, what else?
Let me think.
Good times.
Well, maybe just one good time.
But the main thing is
I got to meet the guy
on my second grade lunchbox.
Hasselhoff, wow!
E.B.?
E.B.?
E.B.?
Psst! Fred!
What are you doing?
Pink Berets.
Pink what?
Pink Berets.
There is nobody here.
Oh yes, there is.
If they see me, they'll take
me back to Easter Island
and I'll never get
my chance to drum!
Pink Berets? Huh?
Sounds super fierce.
Don't be fooled by
their adorable name.
They're the Easter
Bunny's Royal Guard!
But you're the Easter Bunny!
Aren't you?
Of course I am, technically.
What do you mean,
"technically"?
I'll explain later.
Just get in the car.
Look, I was supposed to take
over this year, but I ran away.
What are you, crazy?
Who wouldn't want to
be the Easter Bunny?
That's, like,
the greatest job ever!
Yeah, you'd think so.
But it's what my dad wants, not me.
He expects so much.
What's left for me to do but let him down?
Sounds familiar.
Sometimes fathers
just don't get it.
He told me I only
ever think of myself.
Other times, they hit the
nail right on the head.
Come on, Fred.
I know we said we'd go
our own separate ways,
but please,
you've got to protect me.
Look, I'm sorry,
but I can't really
leave you places,
I can't really
take you places.
And I've got to go to
my sister's play tonight.
Oh, I like plays.
We should go see a play
that my sister's not in
and that my family will
not be attending.
I understand.
Just drop me off at the bus station.
I'm sure I'll be fine.
I could be one of
those street drummers,
with a bucket!
Hi. How you doing?
Good.
Who's your kid playing?
An egg.
An egg?
Yeah.
Wow, that's something.
My kid is the Easter Bunny.
The one that
makes it all happen.
All right, Dad, all the roles
are equally important.
Sure, sure.
Fred!
Please get to your seats.
The play is about to begin.
Hey, guys. Mom, Dad.
Here comes Peter Cottontail
Hopping down the bunny trail
Hippity hoppity,
Easter's on its way
Bringing every girl and boy
Baskets full of Easter joy
Ugh! What is that
dreadful sound?
Oh, no! They found me!
Run for it!
It's the Pink Berets!
Oh! Never mind, everyone.
False alarm.
Please continue with
your awful singing.
How did that
rabbit just talk?
Um...
Fred has been
studying ventriloquism.
Yeah! I might
do it professionally.
Woohoo!
You're being ridiculous.
Stop it! Sit down!
You should be
nicer to your son.
It's just a thought.
Who wants to hear a song?
We'd love to sing a song for you.
No, we wouldn't.
Stop making a fool
of yourself! Sit down!
Absolutely.
I want candy
I want candy
Take it, kids.
I know a girl
who's tough but sweet
She's so fine
she can't be beat
She's got everything I desire
He's really good!
I can see his lips move.
Sets the summer sun on fire
I want candy
I want candy!
Just the proud moms now.
I want candy
Now the grumpy dads.
I want candy
All I want is your candy
All I want is your...
Chewy
Fun to eat
So darn sweet
Candy
We're a hit!
They love us!
Here.
Are those for me?
Mmm-hmm.
Thank you. So sweet.
Alex. Good job tonight!
Wasn't she
a good Easter Bunny?
Jerk!
Oh! Hey, Dad.
I was just leaving.
Fred, seems like we made quite an
impression on you the other night.
Is this your new career?
Upstaging grade-schoolers with
your ventriloquist puppet?
No, no, I got lots of
other stuff going on.
Yeah.
There it is.
What?
That look. The complete and
utterly disappointed look.
Well, I'm sorry, Fred,
but can you give me just,
I don't know,
one reason not to
be disappointed?
Well...
Just one.
Yeah.
Fred?
Fred, where'd you go?
Yeah, I'm right here.
I just remembered I have a really
great solid lead, actually.
You do?
Yeah, a great job.
Tell me about it.
I can't really tell you about it.
But it's big.
You're going to love it.
It's really big!
Hey, what's with the "Mr.
Serious" all of a sudden?
Wait, is this where you tell me
you want to see other rabbits?
Because I'm
open-minded, Fred.
E.B., I have
the most amazing idea.
When I was a kid,
I told everyone
that I saw
the Easter Bunny, right?
No one believed me,
even though
he left me this.
This chocolate bunny,
which I kept.
Oh, dear.
And tonight, it just hit me.
I realized that it was
my destiny to see him.
Just like it was my
destiny to meet you.
It's all been
leading up to this.
Up to what?
You don't want to be
the Easter Bunny, right?
I know who can
take your place.
Who?
Me!
I'm sorry, Fred. Would you mind
repeating that in my good ear?
I want to be the Easter Bunny.
What was that for?
That is for people
who have gone loony!
A human Easter Bunny?
Come on, Fred!
It doesn't make sense.
A bunny makes no sense.
You deliver eggs.
If you wanna get all logical,
bring logic into this,
you should be
an Easter Chicken.
What? Come on.
People might resist it at first.
But, hey, change can be a good thing.
You don't want the job anyway.
The pressure is ungodly!
It did a number on me.
Do you know there was a
period of roughly nine months
where the sight of a colored
egg made me want to vomit?
And rabbits are
physically unable to vomit.
So it was just hours of...
Nothing coming out.
I don't care.
Imagine that, Fred.
Don't care.
If you can be a drummer,
I can be the Easter Bunny.
Fred, you can't just
be the Easter Bunny.
My dad has to give you
special powers. Eh.
Besides, the Easter Bunny
has got to be fit. Ow!
And you're a little scrawny.
Finally, the Easter Bunny
has got to have
lightning-fast reflexes.
Hi-ya!
Knock it off. I'm serious.
I can do this.
I will be the Bunny.
The stubborn old bunny
refuses to crown anyone else.
This can only mean
one thing, my friends.
We are going to have to take
matters into our own hands.
Um, um, um.
Carlos? Carlos?
Yes, Phil?
We don't have hands, per se-.
No, it's a figure
of speech, Phil.
Right. Got it.
Too long have we labored under the
yoke of the bunnies' tyranny.
Well, no more!
It's time for
the Easter Chick to rise!
Um, um...
Yes, Phil?
Just thinking out loud.
But wouldn't it be easier just to
wait for E.B.? I mean, he can fix this.
Phil, if you love E.B.
so much, why don't you marry him?
E.B. is gone, okay?
Oh.
There is a new boss.
Really? Who is it?
Is it me?
Are you being serious?
Yes. Hi.
Just rehearsing for the
big Easter sing-a-long.
Okay, everybody, this time
sing a lot more better.
And one, and two.
And three and four.
It's me. Me, you idiot.
I'm taking over.
Oh. I see.
But first,
I must get in shape.
I will be the Bunny.
You know,
I've been thinking, Fred.
Oh!
Hey, E.B., what's up?
Fred, listen.
You helped me become a drummer.
And how do I repay you?
I jellybean all over
your dream. Well, no. No.
I've changed me mind.
I've seen the light.
We're going to do this.
And nice job on the eggs.
I told you I was serious.
Seventy-two.
Conditioning is a must, Fred.
Seventy-three.
This is fun. Just a couple of
dudes hanging out, getting buff.
I could do this
all day!
Me, too, Fred.
I feel great.
Phil, how am I doing?
Be honest.
Next up,
speed and agility, Fred.
I want you to run so fast that you're
just a handsome blur with great hair.
Ready? Go!
Fred, that was awesome!
For a couple of seconds,
you touched greatness.
I can feel the burn!
But it's good.
it's a good burn.
Phil, too fast!
Too fast, Phil!
Sorry, sir.
Come on, Fred!
Keep hopping!
Woohoo!
That's the spirit!
The student is
becoming the master.
The Padawan is
becoming the Jedi!
The human being is
becoming the Easter Bunny.
I can feel myself
getting stronger.
Phil? How do I
look from back there?
My buttocks,
they are pretty firm, yeah?
It's a wonderful
butt, Carlos.
Si, si, I know.
That's very good,
in a crude, primitive,
offensive-to-me-personally kind of way.
What do you think?
Uh...
It's a little too
hot for the kids, no?
Very impressive!
But I can bet you can go even faster.
Way to go! Stay calm, Fred.
Dogs can smell fear.
And you have nothing
to fear but fear itself,
and this dog I'm riding on.
Wow!
Nice work, Fred.
Oh, no. Not today.
Ah!
What about Fred?
He'll be all right.
Whoa.
Hey, I know you guys.
You're the Pink Berets,
right? Ha!
E.B. said you guys were so
scary, but you're really...
You're really adorable.
Oh.
Easter Island.
Oh.
They brought me here to lead them
in all things Easter, of course!
Hello, my fellow Easter-teers.
I am truly, truly humbled
by your choice in me.
And as I stand
before you, I...
Oh.
Is this part of
the Coronation ritual?
Phuh!
Murderer!
Picking up a little
tension in the room.
Carlos!
What's going on?
Who is this person
and what's he doing here?
Wow, you're him.
The big guy. I'm Fred O'Hare.
I met you...
Well, I didn't meet you.
I saw you when I was a kid.
You look great.
Seor Bunny,
brace yourself.
This heartless human,
he has killed your son!
What? E.B.?
Did you Say "kill"?
NO, I didn't kill E.B.
Oh! Liar!
This can't be so.
Where are the Pink Berets?
Non
Wait a minute.
That's not...
Silence, human!
Can't you see you have
broken his poor old heart?
Are you kidding me?
Old friend,
I share your sorrow.
E.B. was like
your son to me.
I'm trying to
keep it together.
But don't you worry,
I will take care of Easter.
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Does anyone care
that that's a Butterball turkey?
No, no, that is E.B.
He has the same
shirt and everything.
My deepest condolences.
Attention, all bunnies.
There will be a service for E-B.
in the egg painting room.
Carrots and coffee to follow.
Carlos. What are you up to?
It's called
a coup d'tat.
Which is French
for coup d'tat!
But, Carlos.
You've been my most trusted
number two for years.
Guess what? I am sick
of doing number two.
It is our time
for number one!
Yeah? We the bosses now.
All hail Carlos!
We the bosses!
We the bosses! Woohoo!
Pink Berets!
Seize him!
Woohoo!
Hey! Don't do that.
He's a beloved holiday icon!
No!
You can do this.
You are the world's best rabbit drummer.
You are a superstar.
You are a jerk
for abandoning Fred.
Hey, I don't need that
kind of voice in my head!
Yeah, well, you should have thought
of that before you abandoned Fred.
Look, you better tell me
something positive about me.
I can't. You abandoned Fred.
Oh! Hello, who is
this gorgeous devil?
Is Eb in here, please?
Eb?
It's "E.B." That's me.
Oh, all right, well, E.B.
, you're wanted on stage in two minutes.
Welcome to Hoff Knows Talent.
You guys look great- There are all
kinds of exciting acts tonight-
There he is.
How's my little guy?
Actually, David Hasselhoff,
I've got a problem.
Hmm.
Is it the jitters?
Believe me, even I used to get them.
Now, I find a good way...
No, it's not
the jitters, David.
I'm starting to realize I might
be a really selfish rabbit.
Look, I love drumming.
But when my
friend needed me most,
I left him in a house full of
highly trained ninja bunnies.
What am I going to do?
Hmm.
A dilemma as old
as time itself.
I know that if I left right
now, I'd be giving up fame.
And untold riches.
And untold riches.
And all the bunnies
you could ever want.
Yes, and all the...
You're not really
helping much, David.
Like, at all!
And Fred could be
in real trouble.
Go to him.
Go to him.
Give it up for Mr.
David Hasselhoff!
It's The Hoff#
Fred?
Anybody home?
Fred?
Uh-Oh.
The Easter moon
is on the rise.
At midnight,
her radiant beams will fill up
the Egg of Destiny with magic.
Then, at last, Senor Bunny,
I will be Easter's new king!
Carlos, I'm
warning you!
The Egg of Destiny is too dangerous
in the hands of a chick.
Its power can only
be wielded by a bunny.
Oh, yes? Well, look at me wielding.
I'm wielding!
Ooh-ooh. I'm wielding
it again. Okay?
Oh, Carlos, can I wield
the Egg of Destiny? Please?
No.
Can I at least touch it?
OW!
There, you touched it.
That was harsh.
But, Carlos,
think of the children.
Yes, but I am! The childrens.
They don't want
candy and chocolate.
From now on,
their baskets will be filled with
clumps of bird seed, dried crickets,
and the world's finest worms!
Mmm! Mmm! Mmm!
Mmm!
Have you
completely lost your mind?
Silence! You see,
this is why he must go.
It's this lousy attitude
of his. Well, no more!
The more sensitive chicks in the
room may want to avert their eyes.
What about
a compromise, okay?
The bunny gets Easter one year
and the chick gets it the next.
Enough of the chitty-chatty.
Bye-bye, Easter Bunny.
Hello! Hey, everyone.
I'm back. Yep, it was all a
big mistake, but I'm alive.
Hey, Larry, Kyle,
what are you doing in there?
E.B.! You're alive!
E.B.!
Dad? Fred? What's going on?
Gummy cannons! In position.
Fire at will!
That hurt!
Put him on the belt, boys.
Dice him, slice him, and pulverize him!
That is a bit excessive.
Oh, no! E.B.!
Son!
The reign of
the bunny is over!
Oh!
Somebody help!
Help us!
What are you doing? Don't worry, Dad, Fred.
I'll be right there.
To the Egg Sleigh!
And step on it!
Are these ropes made
of black licorice?
Yes, yes, they are.
Horrible stuff!
We can eat through them.
I suppose you can.
You see, my friends?
It is just like I told you, no?
Oh, tonight is going to
be a very big night!
I'm flying!
Without even
flapping my tiny wings.
Everything is
coming up Carlos!
Got it!
Good man, Fred.
Hop on.
All right. Let's go!
I'm starting to get a sense
of impending doom now.
Ow!
No!
I made it!
All right. Here we go!
Come on, Fred!
Whoa!
Look, Fred! There he is.
it's E.B.! E.B.!
The Egg Sleigh!
You've got to stop Carlos!
Don't worry, Dad!
I'm on it!
The power is
surging through my veins!
It's good to be the king.
En?
What is happening to me?
Uh-Oh.
Whoa!
Come on out, Carlos.
It ends here!
You think you can
just take over Easter?
Well, guess what?
I actually think
you're on to something.
You're a bright man,
you're an innovator.
I like it.
Give it a whirl.
One second. Hey!
You finish?
Um... Not quite.
Take that!
Get off!
Whoa!
Incoming!
Why?
Bunny slam!
OW!
You father was a fool to think you
would ever amount to anything.
Here comes
Carlos Yellowtail
Hopping down the chicky trail
Easter is coming your way
Okay, Phil,
initiate take-off procedures.
Aye-aye, Captain!
Chicks, fall in!
Attention!
Here we go.
Right naps!
Left flaps!
Okay, we're good to go!
Let's go, Phil.
Easter is waiting.
Righty-o.
Uh-Oh.
Oh, boy.
Phil, let's get
this bird in the air!
Yeah!
Phil!
Knock off the dancing!
Yes, sir. Sorry.
Lifting off!
No way! The show is not over.
Phil!
What are you doing?
Fly us straight!
No, no, Phil!
Knock it off!
Keep her level!
NO, Phil.
Phil! Phil!
Phil! Please, Phil!
Phil!
Phil, I'm feeling a little...
Will you please stop dancing?
Phil!
Woohoo!
Yeah, that's right!
This is not over!
Ah-ha!
Thank you very much.
Dad!
E.B.!
I was so worried, Son.
I'm so sorry for
all the things I said.
Me, too, Dad.
And your friend, here.
He saved my life.
He was magnificent!
Well, I...
I kind of was.
Hey, thanks, Fred.
Well, Easter's in a few hours.
I have to get going.
What?
Dad, I'm ready.
But, E.B.,
what about your dream?
I'm still going to
be a drummer, Dad.
But I can be
the Easter Bunny, too.
There's just one thing.
All right, then.
Fredrick O'Hare.
Yes, Sir.
Please step forward.
Down on one knee.
Left or right,
doesn't matter.
And now, place your forefinger
on the Egg of Destiny.
Oh...
EB., you as well.
By the power vested in me,
I pronounce E.B.
and Fred O'Hare
co-Easter Bunnies.
Hear, hear!
Wow!
Now go forth and deliver!
Woohoo!
Wonderful brunch, Bonnie.
Thank you, dear.
It is delicious.
Totally agree.
This is amazing, Mom.
You should open a restaurant.
I'm serious.
That is a very nice
thing to say, Fred.
And can I say that
I love your costume?
I think it is so cheerful.
Thanks, Mom.
But it's a uniform.
I'm so tired.
Yeah, you were up very late
delivering pizzas.
Easter baskets.
Every time you say "Easter
baskets," I hear "pizza. "
It just helps me cope.
Guys,
can we not do this today?
Oh, they're here.
This is exciting.
That is my
co-Easter Bunny.
Hey, why don't you guys come see me off?
It'll be fun.
Well, that's weird.
Who do you think it is?
I don't know.
Wow.
Fred.
Fred, wait.
This is
amazing!
I know, right?
It's pretty cool, huh?
I'm sorry I gave
you such a hard time.
Aw, Dad, come on.
You don't have to...
I'm proud of you.
Thanks, Dad.
Easter Bunny.
Wow!
The one who
makes it all happen.
Say the words, Fred.
Bring it home.
Happy Easter to all!
And to all, a good mid-to-late morning.
On Cheepers! On Peepers!
On Biscuit and Buzzy!
On Chucky! On Clucky!
On Feathers and Carlos.
Yeah, come on, Carlos.
Put your back into it.
I've been flapping all night, so
just cut me some slacks, okay?
One little coup and suddenly
I'm everybody's chump.
Fred, what did she say?
Was that about me?
You speak Chinese? Just when I
think I can't love you any more...