Hotel for Dogs (2009) Movie Script
You want some?
- How'd we do?
- $27.
Nobody questions shrink wrap.
- Are you hungry?
- A little bit. The dog probably is a lot.
Good job.
Can you stop touching my hair?
Hey, his collar slipped off.
And you waited right here.
What a good boy. Yes, you are!
Oh, we missed you too, buddy.
I hope he knows what we go through
just to feed him.
All right, here you go, Friday.
I've never seen a dog
eat that much. Ever.
Here you go.
Nice catch.
Go.
Go.
Meet us at home, Friday.
Excuse me, miss.
That's her.
She's the one who ripped me off.
Thank goodness you're here, Officer.
This guy's been stalking me all day,
and it's really freaking me out.
Okay, thanks. I really appreciate it.
Either I call you or
I have to fill out all the forms.
- Love to Alice.
- Yeah. Same to Carol.
Central City PD, precinct desk.
Hold on, I'll transfer you.
Put it down.
- Hey.
- Hey, Bernie.
Don't "Hey, Bernie" me.
You know I have half a mind
to leave you two here?
You're sprung. Come on, let's go.
Hurry up.
I'll do the rest of my yelling
while I'm taking you back.
Look, the guy
could have pressed charges.
You sold him a rock in a box
for 20 bucks.
Oh, that's funny?
It's not funny. It's anything but funny.
What if they'd called Carl and Lois
instead of me?
I guess you'd have to find us
new foster parents, then.
Is that what you're trying to do?
You guys, that's
a very dangerous game, I'm telling you.
One and...
No.
You know, the word "harmonizing"
comes from the word "harmony."
- So?
- So I'm saying you're still half a step off.
Oh, really? Well, that's funny
because my vocal instructor,
who is a paid vocal instructor,
didn't notice that, but you did.
Here's the note.
You're late.
And you interrupted rehearsal.
I'm very sorry.
Get in there. Hurry up.
Babe, maybe we should skip this one
and just play the hit.
- They're all hits, baby.
- You're right.
- Hey, Bernie.
- Carl.
Your food's on your trays.
Yummy! It's too bad we already ate.
Fine. It'll be lunch tomorrow.
All right, could we just get back
to the issue at hand, okay?
I'm a kind woman. Okay?
In fact, everyone's always asking,
"Lois, why are you so kind?"
But we have rules. Okay?
We serve dinner at a certain time, so
we can finish dinner at a certain time.
So we can drop our rock manifesto
on the world at a certain time.
Okay, but those times have come
and gone. So...
Oh, where were they?
Look, this whole thing is my fault. Okay?
We were just getting caught up
and we were having so much fun...
Whoa. Yeah.
...that I just lost track of time.
I'm sorry, really. My apologies.
Now, why don't we just
get them to their room
and you guys can continue
making that magic.
- Thanks for covering for us.
- Andi, Andi. Listen!
You cannot afford to screw this up.
You've only been here
two months, okay?
This is your fifth set
of foster parents in three years.
The Johnsons don't count,
we were there for two hours.
Do you know the reaction I get
when I tell people
I'm trying to place
11 and 16-year-old siblings?
It ain't a good one. Okay?
You guys mess this up, that's it.
I don't have any more favors
I can call in.
I'm gonna have to
place you two separately.
No! You know I won't
let that happen, Bernie.
We stay together.
All right, then
take a little advice from me, okay?
A technique that I've learned.
When somebody who I...
...who I don't particularly like is saying
something that I don't want to hear,
I just nod and I go, "Mmm-hmm."
It works wonders.
Mmm-hmm.
Okay, I'm through with you guys.
I'll tell you what, I better not get
any more phone calls
about a trick with a brick
or a scam with a ham...
Okay, it was a good talk, Bernie.
Thank you very much for stopping by.
What are you guys...
Good boy. Somebody's tired today, huh?
I am.
Friday.
- Andi.
- Yeah.
- Friday's gone.
- What?
- Friday, come here.
- Where'd he go?
Good God.
You two are just a bundle of energy.
Good morning!
Stop shouting.
My vocal instructor said getting
frightened is bad for my pitch.
What are you doing up so early?
- Just thought we'd get some...
- Breakfast!
All right, so, I unlocked the pantry.
Your cereal's in there.
You know how to get it.
I'm not your servant. All right?
I am obliged to prepare two meals
a day, that's lunch and dinner.
Friday!
What?
I said,
"Bruce, what is the day after Thursday?"
- Friday!
- Thanks.
Fine. Get weird on me.
I can handle weird.
Okay, I don't need your attitude
about setting the table, okay?
Don't be lazy.
It needs cinnamon.
Or is it cinnamon that Carl's allergic to?
Well, one way to find out, I guess.
Let's see him harmonize
with a tongue the size of a beehive.
Wait! You just reminded me
of this really funny story.
I was walking and I stepped on a bee
and it stung me.
So then, I went and took care of my foot,
then I went back for the bee
to throw it outside and I thought,
"You know, I'd be safe because
bees can't sting you more than once."
Right? I mean, right? It was crazy.
I mean, isn't that crazy?
Excuse me.
You owe me 30 seconds of my life,
and I will collect.
Thanks for the heart attack.
Of course I checked in there,
maybe they're in the kids' room.
Carl, did you eat the bacon?
Stay close, Friday.
Did I leave my whitening strips in here?
He'd usually be here by now.
You know, maybe he can't hear it.
It's mealtime.
He could hear it on the moon.
He's probably just wandering around.
Friday! Friday!
- What are we gonna do?
- Come on. Friday!
Friday! Come on!
Maybe he ran down this alley.
Friday!
You don't think he went in there,
do you?
No. Why would he go in there?
He's probably just out looking for food.
Friday!
How cute. I want one.
Nice haircut.
Thanks, Dave.
I was hoping you'd notice.
Oh, I was actually
talking about the Pomeranian.
But yours is, yours is really nice, too.
- You did something new to it.
- I did.
And I'm pretty sure you could tell
when I first got it done
because you kind of looked at me
and then looked away,
and then looked back like,
"Hey, something's different."
But then you didn't say anything
and I was like, "Men."
So then the next day I tried
to compliment you on your hair,
you know,
giving you a little hint here but...
No, absolutely. I totally remember that.
Anyways, it looks great.
Can I help you?
No, no, we're just looking for our dog.
I don't suppose you've seen him,
have you?
No.
Friday? That's a funny name.
I bet when you find him, you'll say,
"Thank God it's Friday."
Right? It's a joke. So...
I don't think
I've ever seen you around here before.
- Do you go to Thomas Jefferson?
- I will actually, in the fall. Andi.
Dave.
My family just moved here
a couple of months ago.
That's cool. How do you like it so far?
What's not to like?
- We have to go.
- No problem.
You know, if he doesn't show up soon,
you might want to check the pound.
- Friday! Friday! There he is!
- There he is.
- There he is.
- There he is! Friday! Friday!
- Your dog?
- Yeah, that's our dog!
Yeah, he just got in.
Yeah, I know, we just saw him.
Well, I'm always glad
when these things have a happy ending.
We're open till 6:00. Get your parents,
come back, we'll figure it out.
Wait! Wait...
Come on, we're already here.
It's our dog.
Yeah, well, there's a lot of paperwork.
Grown-up paperwork.
There's always a guy
who screws up the paperwork.
But you see this guy? I'm not that guy.
We can't let him out alone anymore.
I mean, if he gets picked up again,
we might not get him back.
And things are gonna get
so much harder when school starts.
Look, Bruce, I think we need
to find Friday a new home.
- Well, you know, I've got a few ideas.
- No.
We've been hiding him
in alleys and garages,
in the woods for three years.
Don't you think he deserves
a real home with a real family?
But we are a real family.
Let's get out of here.
- You kids! Hold it right there!
- We can't get in trouble again.
- But we didn't do anything wrong.
- You want to tell them that?
Oh, my God.
- Friday! No! Get back here!
- Bruce!
Come on.
- You got anything?
- No.
Forget it.
Let's just find Friday
and get out of here.
Friday!
Circuits are fried.
Friday!
Bruce, stay close.
Wow. Andi, look at all this stuff.
Careful.
Friday?
Friday, where are you, boy?
- What's that?
- It's just an old hotel.
Hotels don't make footsteps.
People make footsteps when they walk
through hotels with their feet.
Good point. Come on!
Go, go, go!
Friday, stay back.
Do you think they belong to anyone?
If they did, would they be here?
Better here than the pound.
Friday! Wait!
- Look at that.
- Okay.
What about just, you know,
leaving Friday with them tonight?
One night.
Good night, guys. Sleep tight.
So I mean it's supposed to be
a teacher appreciation lunch, right?
But then it ends up
being more work for us
if we have to set it up
and then clean it up.
I mean, sometimes, you know,
I could appreciate
a little less appreciation, you know?
Don't nod and "Mmm-hmm" me.
I taught you the nod and "Mmm-hmm."
Yeah, that's true,
but I'd like to think I've made it my own.
Oh, really?
- What's wrong?
- It's these kids, the other night.
- Andi and Bruce?
- Yeah.
- Are they okay?
- I don't know.
I mean, it's bad enough
they lost their parents.
If they can't work this situation out,
I don't know if we're gonna be able
to find a family
that's gonna take the both of them.
You do everything you can for them,
you know.
You can't bring home
your work and let it make you crazy.
- You're right.
- Yeah.
- Love you.
- Love you, too.
It's too bad.
You know, they really are good kids.
It's three hungry dogs.
Grab as much as you can.
That's quite a load there.
Yeah. Just getting some breakfast.
What, are you feeding
the whole neighborhood?
Okay, you wouldn't even touch this
the first time.
I don't eat, you're angry.
I eat, you're angry.
Okay, fine, people, eat.
Lucky for you I saved your dinners.
You can start with those.
Come on.
What is that?
You know, if you would eat
the meals I make,
you wouldn't be so hungry
in the morning.
You're right. Thank you so much, Lois.
Done.
I'm hearing something.
What?
- What's his problem?
- I don't know. Why are you asking me?
Stop howling, please.
Yes, I'd like to call in a complaint
about a howling dog.
That's it?
All that just so
you could look out a window?
Never mind.
Wow. Even Lenny
and Georgia won't touch it.
We need to go get
some real dog food for them.
Wait, who?
Lenny and Georgia.
That's what I named the new dogs.
No. No naming them.
If you name them,
you're gonna get attached.
Andi, look at her.
Tell me she's not a Georgia.
Bruce, I'm not kidding, okay?
I'm glad
that Friday's getting along well with
dog number one and dog number two,
but we're barely keeping our dog safe.
I mean, do you know what happens
if we get caught in here?
Trespassing, breaking and entering.
You heard what Bernie said.
They'd split us up and ship us off.
Are you even listening?
So I'll stay here and keep them quiet
while you go out
and get some real food. Okay?
Okay, fine. But just for now.
And I'll be back.
Stay, Friday. Stay, Georgia.
You better keep them quiet.
You like to fetch.
- Hey. I see you found your dog.
- Yeah. He's fine.
That's great.
- Can I help you find anything?
- No, just getting some dog food.
- That's 40 pounds, by the way.
- Yeah, that's probably right.
For that little dog on the flier,
40 pounds?
Well, the thing is, I actually...
I have three dogs,
two of them are strays.
- My parents, they just love animals.
- That's great.
Yeah. You know, they're the best.
I'm really lucky.
We have this big yard
and we just rescue dogs all the time.
- All the time?
- Well, yeah, whenever.
You know what? Here, come with me.
- They're so cute.
- Yeah.
We adopt out dogs here,
but we can't get anybody
to take these guys.
They're not puppies anymore,
and everybody always wants puppies.
Tell me about it.
They're also kind of...
Well, they're loveably defective.
Cooper, he's my favorite.
I think he's actually half goat.
There's not a substance on Earth
he can't chew through.
He's been through pocketbooks,
cell phones, shoes, handbags,
even ate through a license plate once.
This is Shep.
Yeah, she's got some herding issues.
- Pushy.
- I like pushy.
So, they've got quirks.
I mean, they're still adorable.
Good, I'm glad you think so,
because you're taking them.
What? No.
The owner says
we can't keep them forever
and if I can't find a place to put them,
then they're going to the pound.
Look, I'm sorry,
but there's no way that I can just...
You're already taking care
of a few strays, what's three more?
- Three?
- Oh, yeah. You're gonna love this guy.
Romeo. Romeo. Romeo.
Whoa.
What if you just took them
for a little while?
Until I can figure something out.
I'll pay for food.
I get an employee discount.
It's the least I can do.
Georgia, I'm sorry, but I can't stand here
all day playing fetch with you.
Georgia, zip it.
No.
Guys, come on! Please! Oh, no!
What's it gonna take for me
to get you guys to...
Sweet ride.
Yeah, it's pretty much a chick magnet.
I'm not gonna lie to you.
Getting close. Right there. That's it.
This is where you live?
Actually, my parents are out of town,
so I kind of had to make
other arrangements.
This place looks condemned.
What are we doing here?
It's where we keep the dogs.
- Well, are you allowed to be in there?
- No, so let's move it.
All right, guys, watch this.
Ready?
Are you sure it's safe in here?
Yeah. We've been poking around here
for a couple of days, actually.
Okay, that hurt.
Hold your fire. Hold your fire.
Bruce, you remember Dave, right?
Dave from the pet store.
Hi, Dave.
He just needed a place
to keep a couple of dogs
and I thought, you know,
"Hey, we have a place."
So you made this?
Yeah. It's a work in progress.
And how did you learn
how to make that?
My dad.
Wouldn't it be easier
just to throw it, though?
Yeah, but that's not really the point.
The point is when I get it working,
she should be able to play fetch
even when we're not here.
Can you give me free pay-per-view?
Oh, poop!
Literally!
What is going on here?
I mean, who poops on the floor?
- Sorry. I need to work on that.
- How did you find us?
I followed the van
with the ears and the tail.
You're not gonna tell anyone, are you?
Why would I tell?
I'm gonna help you guys.
- Really?
- Yeah.
I love dogs, and there's a lot more
to taking care of them
than throwing a stick and feeding them.
You guys need me.
I say she's in.
Okay. I mean,
how much trouble can they be?
Come on, guys.
Do you really think we can do this,
like, every day?
Yeah, why not? This is a piece of cake.
- Guys, come back! Come back!
- Guys, stop. Stop, stop, stop.
Treat! Who wants a treat?
Friday, no! Where is Romeo?
Okay, Heather, you go that way,
I'll go this way.
Aren't we supposed
to be wearing them out?
This is totally normal.
- Oh, so you think this is funny?
- No, no, not at all.
Actually, I was just about to thank you
for reminding me to watch where I...
...step.
You know, I think we might
be in a little over our heads.
It's 4-6, we're outdogged.
Guys, it's really not that bad.
I mean, if you look at it,
dogs have three basic needs.
That's eating, sleeping
and then peeing and pooping.
- That's four.
- No, I think peeing and pooping's one.
I've stepped in both,
and I'd have to disagree.
Look, guys, I'm serious.
I really think I can make this work.
How?
What do you think?
Thanks.
No, no, no, no. No.
Ready?
That's disgusting.
That has to be the grossest thing
I've ever seen.
That's awesome.
We just wandered in here.
I'm not really sure what that thing was.
Don't worry. I'm not gonna tell anyone.
In fact, if you let me,
I'd love to help you guys.
I just work down the street, you know,
I could keep an eye on the fuzz,
could run interference,
massage your shoulders.
- Okay, easy there, tiger.
- Yeah.
Thanks for the offer,
but I think we got it under control.
Could I have a word with you?
All right. I've got to be honest.
I'm at a critical point
in my social development
and those are two fine-looking,
hot women you have behind you,
and let's face it,
you can't date them both.
So, who do you have dibs on?
Dibs? I don't have dibs, per se.
Gotcha.
Name's Mark.
Hi, Mark. You're on poop duty.
Okay. So, how many dogs
are we talking here?
- Just six.
- Seven.
What is that?
Actually, this is the newest member
of our family.
This is Henry.
The poor guy was scrounging for food
in the junkyard.
- Bruce, that...
- Andi.
Honestly, we have enough room.
We could take one more.
One more? We can fit, like, 10 more.
Think about that.
Oh, yeah,
why don't we just wander the streets
and rescue every stray we see?
That was funny.
Dispatch to 22. We have a stray
on Saint Andrews and Sixth.
Saint Andrews and Sixth.
Okay, guys, we've got a stray
on Saint Andrews and Sixth.
That's Saint Andrews and Sixth.
It's right near the pound, so hurry.
Hello? Hi. Sorry to bother you.
We were wondering
if we could have a minute of your time.
- Not interested.
- We work for the school newspaper
and we would love an interview.
All right. You know what?
I don't have time for this.
You guys just get out of here.
Skedaddle and play somewhere else.
Okay.
What's the matter?
Never seen a husky kid
in a hoodie before?
All right, guys,
get over to the old railroad depot ASAP.
Over there. That's them.
- He's stuck.
- Is she hurt?
That's so sweet. They stayed together.
You okay?
You're safe now.
We're gonna take care of you guys.
Give me paw.
There's that white one again.
Let's get him.
Here, doggy. Here, doggy.
All right, come on, guys.
You're being rescued.
Here, dog.
Hey, come back here, you mangy mutt.
Hey! Come back here.
All right, come on! Come on, everybody.
Come on. Come on. Come on.
- Head to tail. Head to tail. Come on.
- Come on. Get across, guys.
Go, go, go!
Come on, trust it.
You can do it. Come on. Come on.
Good boy.
Passengers loaded.
- Heading back to base.
- Copy that.
- One, two, three, go!
- Okay. Okay. Go!
- Wait!
- Oh, what's that?
Hey, what is this? What's going on?
- Thumb war.
- Thumb war? Any calls?
Nothing.
Where are all the dogs?
Thank you for riding the simulator.
Please exit for the next customer.
Out!
Next.
And please keep your paws
inside the vehicle at all times.
Come on. Come on. Come on.
There's gotta be something
you like to do.
Go get her. Go get her.
I'll get it.
- Bernie.
- Oh, hey, Bernie.
Excellent. Bernie.
Carl, Lois, I'm gonna borrow the kids
for a second, is that okay?
I don't know if you heard, but Lois and I
got a gig this weekend. Paid.
Wow. Really?
I'm gonna RSVP you and the missus
as a yes, right?
I'm not sure that I'm actually gonna
be able to make it.
What about that friend of yours
that owns the club?
Oh, yeah, he's definitely gonna be there.
Yeah? Excellent.
- I told you.
- Yeah.
- So what is this emergency?
- Who cares? At least we're out of there.
They were about to start band practice.
- Hey, what's up?
- Hey, Jason.
Hey, guys, I think I may have found
the perfect foster parents for you.
- Perfect?
- They're perfect.
They had two foster kids
that just went off to college
and they're looking for two more,
and I think
you guys are really gonna love them.
So that's it, no more Carl and Lois.
You guys get packed, you're out of here.
Thank you, Bernie. Thank you.
Best part about it is
it's only three hours away.
You guys are free.
- What?
- That far?
Yes. What's the problem?
- Well, we really like the area.
- We've made a lot of great friends.
Yeah, and you know, Carl and Lois'
singing really grows on you.
You hate Carl and Lois.
Guys, what's going on?
I mean, they want to make you
a part of their family.
Look, we appreciate
everything you've done, but...
Guys, you're not gonna get
another chance like this.
I really think you should go.
We'd like to stay.
Well, I...
I have no idea what you guys are doing.
We're really sorry.
We're doing the right thing,
aren't we, Friday?
Hey. What's up, puppy.
Is everything okay?
Yeah, yeah, just... Just looking.
- You come up here a lot, huh?
- Yeah.
I'm just guessing this is the kind of view
I wouldn't be able to afford
if this place were a real hotel.
So, what are you doing tomorrow night?
Sneaking out,
serving 60 pounds of kibble,
maybe mopping up some drool.
'Cause a friend of mine
is having this party
and you could come and meet some
people you'll be going to school with.
The keyword here really being "people."
Good point.
Great. So, where should I pick you up?
Why don't you just tell me where it is?
I can meet you there.
All right.
That's dinner.
- Hey, guys.
- You guys ready for dinner?
Are you hungry, buddy?
Smells great.
- Oh, thank you.
- You're welcome.
Thanks.
- Thanks.
- You're welcome.
So, Heather,
it's kind of like a dinner date, isn't it?
To us. To a real family.
- To us.
- To us.
- Cheers!
- To us.
Let's eat.
If cartoon birds and mice were ever
going to make me a dress for the ball,
now would be a good time.
- How long are you gonna be gone?
- A few hours, maybe. It's just a party.
What if anything goes wrong?
Bruce, you can handle it.
You can handle anything.
I mean, have you stopped
and looked around the hotel?
I could disappear for a week
and you'd be able
to keep everything running.
Yeah, but you're not gonna
disappear for a week, right?
Of course not.
Now, if you could just build me a dress,
then you'd be a real wizard.
You should check out room 502.
You look... Wow, you...
You look gorgeous.
What, this old thing?
Here, come on in.
Let me show you around.
No! No, Lois!
That's my personal, that's...
- So what else have you stolen?
- Nothing.
- So you admit you did steal it.
- Never said that, Lois.
You might as well tell the truth.
Do you really think
you could outsmart us?
I'd rather not answer that question, Carl.
- I love your dress.
- Thanks.
Marianne, this is Andi.
She's gonna be going to school
with us next year.
- Nice to meet you.
- Andi.
- Hey, Jason.
- Hey.
- How you doing?
- All right.
- You guys already know each other?
- Yeah, it's Andi, right?
Do I know you from somewhere?
Yeah, you live in my grandmother's
building with the Scudders.
No, I'm over on Oak.
I have one of those faces, though.
No, you live with the Scudders.
Come on, help me out here,
I'm not crazy.
They're your foster parents,
you and your little brother... Barry.
- Bruce?
- Bruce, Bruce, Bruce. That's it, Bruce.
Andi, what is he talking about?
Oh, my God, you guys, it's no big deal.
So I guess the Scudders have been
foster parents before, big deal.
They're also our aunt and uncle.
We're just staying with them
while our parents are traveling in China,
and we just call them our parents
because it is easier
than talking about
this whole long boring story, okay?
I'm thirsty, anyone else?
Anyone?
Andi, I...
Andi!
- Did you get a hold of Bernie yet?
- I'm on hold!
Well, tell them it's an emergency.
Tell them I'm being stolen from.
Tell who? I'm on hold!
Don't think this means that...
You let him get away!
Friday?
- Hurry up!
- I'm wearing heels!
Well, so am I!
- I can't believe they own a hotel.
- Oh, God, Carl, you're such an idiot!
Stay close to me, baby.
What was that?
Don't answer it.
Hey, that's my wah-wah pedal.
No wonder my sound's been off.
Yeah, that's why.
This crap is amazing.
Yeah, 'cause it's our crap.
They've been robbing us blind.
Good girl. Drop it! Georgia, drop it!
- Bruce, Bruce!
- Let go. Georgia, let go of it!
- Drop it, please!
- Bruce!
What happened?
Don't ask.
What happened with you?
Oh, no!
- Let's get out of here. Where's the exit?
- Like I left bread crumbs.
Quick, guys, go, go!
- Put the lights back on!
- I didn't do it!
What is that?
- I don't know. Let's get out of here!
- Oh, God! Shut it!
Are you sure they said
it was coming from here?
Don't know.
Let's check upstairs.
- Did you hear the cops?
- I don't know.
Oh, good.
Well, if those were cops,
we're gonna turn them in ourselves,
'cause I smell reward.
I don't think that's reward you smell.
Where are we?
We're in deep doo-doo.
Okay. Stop breathing like that.
No. No.
- No.
- Don't.
Get them in there.
No! What are you doing? Friday!
You can't do this! No! Friday!
- Bruce!
- Friday!
Friday! Let go of me! That's my dog!
Bruce! Just go!
It's okay.
- Thanks.
- You're welcome.
- We're in a lot of trouble, aren't we?
- Yeah.
But Bernie's doing
everything he can to help. Okay?
Look, is there any way
that they could just stay with you
for a little while longer
until I can find a family that'll take them?
Not a chance. God knows
how much they've stolen from us.
We have a lot of very rare
and valuable items in our home, okay?
And we are gonna go
and do a full inventory
and we're letting you know, all right?
This is an outrage. An outrage!
I'm suing you. I'm suing those kids.
I'm suing the state.
I'm suing the guy
that invented shrink wrap.
I'm suing everyone!
So you're gonna send us
to that other house now, right?
That nice couple?
- Bruce...
- Bruce, we're gonna be fine.
I'll take care of it. Don't worry.
Come on, Bernie.
You have to help us, please.
Bruce needs me.
He's gonna get chewed up out there.
Andi, I'm sorry, okay?
There's nothing I can do about it.
You can't separate us, okay?
Don't punish him
just because I screwed things up.
Listen, the best thing you can do
for Bruce right now
is let him have a fresh start.
I'm sorry.
Can't I just say one thing to my sister?
Look, Andi, don't worry about me, okay?
I'm gonna be fine.
I was supposed to keep us together.
I was supposed to protect us.
Andi, we had to protect the dogs.
If I had to do it over again,
I'd do the exact same thing.
First come, first served!
- Tomorrow morning for all of them.
- Yep.
- We're gonna be busy.
- I can use the overtime.
And which one are you?
They must have left you behind.
You're the lucky one.
Come here, buddy.
I know how to sit,
how to fetch and how to roll over.
What I don't know
is how I ended up in here.
Could you please turn that off?
- Please.
- I did turn it off.
Hey!
- You busy?
- Friday!
Oh, good boy. Good boy.
So what's the plan?
The dogs have less than a day left.
We've got to get them out of there now.
Okay, that's really
more a goal than a plan.
There's a no-kill shelter outside the city,
so if we can get them out of the pound
and over the county line,
then they're home free.
- Right.
- But we gotta move quick.
Andi, what happens to us?
It's...
Look, Bruce, it's not gonna be good.
We're gonna be in more trouble
than we've ever been in.
But we're gonna save the dogs.
It's what we're supposed to do, right?
Okay, guys.
Okay, so here's the pound,
and this is the county line,
and this is what we're gonna do.
Are we ready?
Let's do this!
Got sausage.
Fire! Fire! Fire! Hello?
When a young girl is screaming for help
and yelling, "Fire,"
- you're supposed to get moving!
- I have water.
Fire! Hello?
- Where?
- And they say chivalry is dead.
It's right over there.
Hey!
A bunch of kids eager to adopt, I bet.
- Where are the keys?
- There!
You didn't think we'd forget you,
did you?
Come on! Let's go. Come on.
I missed you guys, too.
Come on. Let's go! Come on!
Let's go, Shep! Come on, let's go!
- Let's go for a run, you guys, come on!
- Go, go, go!
Checking out.
We're gonna get you guys out of here.
Come on.
Hurry up, Thor, gotta go!
Let's go, let's go!
Way to go, Shep! Good girl.
Okay, the coast is clear.
Bring her on back.
What's going on here?
I know you. All right, let's go.
You're going to jail.
Trouble! Trouble!
We can do this hard or we can do it
easy. Let's go, missy. Come on.
Keep your paws off of her.
Heather, save yourself!
Save yourself! Go! I have him!
Nobody's going anywhere.
Get back in there.
Keys.
Hey!
Okay, Friday,
you're gonna lead the pack.
- Mark!
- Yes?
Thank you!
Come on, Friday. A little faster, buddy!
You can do it!
Follow the sausage, Friday.
Follow the sausage!
- Well, that went well.
- Yeah, well, we're not done yet.
Come on, Friday, lead your pack!
Good boy!
Come on, guys, follow the meat!
Come on! That's it, Friday, let's go.
Oh, that's not good.
Hey!
- You guys, are we there yet?
- We're almost there, just up ahead.
Wait. What? Oh, no!
Friday!
Guys, come back! This way!
Problem. They just went the other way.
What?
Where are they going?
Home. They're going home.
Block the exits.
Make sure they don't get back out.
Let's get some more
Animal Control out here.
- How much?
- All of it.
We need all available Animal Control
units. All available Animal Control units.
It is pure bedlam down here
as authorities try
to take control of the situation.
This scheme was supposedly
the work of several juvenile delinquents.
Upstairs, right now, let's go!
There's no need to get upset, Officer.
Animal Control is on the scene.
All right, everybody,
if you can just let us do our job,
we'll have all these
dangerous canines rounded up
and out of your hair presently.
- Stop!
- Can I get through here?
- Watch out. Please?
- Excuse me, ma'am. Excuse me.
Oh, no, no, no, no! Not you again!
- Those dogs belong to us.
- They're family.
Yeah, we're not gonna let you
coverall-wearing goons
take them away from us.
And you can put that in your report.
Officer, would you please arrest
these young felons right now
- so we can get back to work?
- Fine! Just leave the dogs alone!
Andi! There he is!
That's our dog!
You can't just take him away!
- Oh, what do we got here? A puppy!
- Just leave my dog alone!
Stop!
- Okay. Now, who are you?
- I'm Bernie Wilkins.
Social Services.
Okay, get them out of here!
Come on, listen.
Can you just hear me out
before you throw these kids in jail
and destroy all these innocent dogs?
I see no reason
why we can't hear both sides.
Look. I'm responsible for these kids,
and I know what they did was wrong.
But I gotta tell you,
I wish I had the guts to do what they did.
I've been trying to place kids
in good homes for 15 years
and most of the time,
I'm not successful.
But these kids,
they didn't make excuses.
They didn't get frustrated
with the system and give up.
They just went out and did it.
They saved everybody.
They created their own little family.
You call this a family? A bunch
of mangy strays in an old hotel?
"Madison."
Madison.
Madison.
"August 3rd,
"found hiding in a backyard after the
family moved away and left her behind."
Viola and Sebastian, the twins.
"Together since they were puppies.
"Viola got snagged on a fence,
"but Sebastian refused
to leave his sister behind."
"Chelsea.
"Chelsea lost her leg in an accident.
"The owner didn't pay the bill
and abandoned her at the vet."
"Coco, Rocky and Harley.
"Found living together
in the woods near a dump."
And there's many more.
"Ginger.
"Henry, Romeo, Juliet.
"Cooper.
"Shep.
"George"? Does that say "George"?
Georgia! Her name's Georgia.
And Lenny.
Georgia and Lenny.
They're the first two residents
in this hotel.
The Hotel for Dogs.
No one was turned away
when they needed a home.
Nobody was abandoned
when they were looking for a family.
Are you really gonna tell me that
we're gonna just abandon them now?
They don't look like
mangy strays, Officer.
But you don't mind
if we take a look upstairs, do you?
I think it's in the public's best interest.
Be my guest.
- You did great.
- You don't think I was too pushy?
I like pushy.
- Mark?
- Heather.
So, is this when the hero gets the girl?
Baby steps.
Do you mind if I...
No. Okay, sorry.
You kids are heroes.
You should be proud.
- Thank you.
- Thanks.
Yeah, but the bad news is, in all this,
I still haven't been able to find a foster
family that's willing to take you guys.
That's okay, Bernie,
we know you tried your best.
But the good news is,
I have found some real parents
that might be willing to adopt.
- Adopt?
- Yeah.
See, the mom is excellent.
She's a teacher,
so she's really great with kids.
And he cannot cook to save his life.
And he shouts during football games
like the players can actually hear him.
But he has a great heart.
Wait a minute.
Do they like dogs?
We love dogs.
Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen.
I'd like to welcome you
to the Hotel for Dogs.
Thanks to the generosity
of the entire city,
we are now able to take care
of all your canine needs.
Thank you, Georgia.
Room 320 is now available.
I'm sorry, Georgia, I forgot your tip.
Good girl. Thanks, Georgia.
Whether you are here to board or adopt,
please note we are a green hotel.
Hi, Cooper.
Cooper, get back to work.
Remember to stop by
our nursery and dog care center
and meet the wonderful pups
available for adoption.
Hi.
Tired doggies can rejuvenate
and refresh at our spa.
We offer everything
from soothing shiatsu massages
to cleansing facials.
And after a healthy workout session,
come visit our beauty salon
to take care of fur styles
and pamper your paws.
We feature a variety of activities
for every dog.
For those 18 dog years and older,
we are proud to present
quality entertainment
in the exclusive Hound Lounge.
- Ruff, ruff, ruff
- Ruff, ruff, ruff
I need a little treat
- Ruff, ruff, ruff
- Ruff, ruff, ruff
- Who's gonna buy me something to eat?
- Something to eat?
Okay, who wants well-done?
Because they're all well done.
- Yes, well, we know. It's his one flaw.
- One flaw?
Hey, I can hear you. I'm right here.
- How'd we do?
- $27.
Nobody questions shrink wrap.
- Are you hungry?
- A little bit. The dog probably is a lot.
Good job.
Can you stop touching my hair?
Hey, his collar slipped off.
And you waited right here.
What a good boy. Yes, you are!
Oh, we missed you too, buddy.
I hope he knows what we go through
just to feed him.
All right, here you go, Friday.
I've never seen a dog
eat that much. Ever.
Here you go.
Nice catch.
Go.
Go.
Meet us at home, Friday.
Excuse me, miss.
That's her.
She's the one who ripped me off.
Thank goodness you're here, Officer.
This guy's been stalking me all day,
and it's really freaking me out.
Okay, thanks. I really appreciate it.
Either I call you or
I have to fill out all the forms.
- Love to Alice.
- Yeah. Same to Carol.
Central City PD, precinct desk.
Hold on, I'll transfer you.
Put it down.
- Hey.
- Hey, Bernie.
Don't "Hey, Bernie" me.
You know I have half a mind
to leave you two here?
You're sprung. Come on, let's go.
Hurry up.
I'll do the rest of my yelling
while I'm taking you back.
Look, the guy
could have pressed charges.
You sold him a rock in a box
for 20 bucks.
Oh, that's funny?
It's not funny. It's anything but funny.
What if they'd called Carl and Lois
instead of me?
I guess you'd have to find us
new foster parents, then.
Is that what you're trying to do?
You guys, that's
a very dangerous game, I'm telling you.
One and...
No.
You know, the word "harmonizing"
comes from the word "harmony."
- So?
- So I'm saying you're still half a step off.
Oh, really? Well, that's funny
because my vocal instructor,
who is a paid vocal instructor,
didn't notice that, but you did.
Here's the note.
You're late.
And you interrupted rehearsal.
I'm very sorry.
Get in there. Hurry up.
Babe, maybe we should skip this one
and just play the hit.
- They're all hits, baby.
- You're right.
- Hey, Bernie.
- Carl.
Your food's on your trays.
Yummy! It's too bad we already ate.
Fine. It'll be lunch tomorrow.
All right, could we just get back
to the issue at hand, okay?
I'm a kind woman. Okay?
In fact, everyone's always asking,
"Lois, why are you so kind?"
But we have rules. Okay?
We serve dinner at a certain time, so
we can finish dinner at a certain time.
So we can drop our rock manifesto
on the world at a certain time.
Okay, but those times have come
and gone. So...
Oh, where were they?
Look, this whole thing is my fault. Okay?
We were just getting caught up
and we were having so much fun...
Whoa. Yeah.
...that I just lost track of time.
I'm sorry, really. My apologies.
Now, why don't we just
get them to their room
and you guys can continue
making that magic.
- Thanks for covering for us.
- Andi, Andi. Listen!
You cannot afford to screw this up.
You've only been here
two months, okay?
This is your fifth set
of foster parents in three years.
The Johnsons don't count,
we were there for two hours.
Do you know the reaction I get
when I tell people
I'm trying to place
11 and 16-year-old siblings?
It ain't a good one. Okay?
You guys mess this up, that's it.
I don't have any more favors
I can call in.
I'm gonna have to
place you two separately.
No! You know I won't
let that happen, Bernie.
We stay together.
All right, then
take a little advice from me, okay?
A technique that I've learned.
When somebody who I...
...who I don't particularly like is saying
something that I don't want to hear,
I just nod and I go, "Mmm-hmm."
It works wonders.
Mmm-hmm.
Okay, I'm through with you guys.
I'll tell you what, I better not get
any more phone calls
about a trick with a brick
or a scam with a ham...
Okay, it was a good talk, Bernie.
Thank you very much for stopping by.
What are you guys...
Good boy. Somebody's tired today, huh?
I am.
Friday.
- Andi.
- Yeah.
- Friday's gone.
- What?
- Friday, come here.
- Where'd he go?
Good God.
You two are just a bundle of energy.
Good morning!
Stop shouting.
My vocal instructor said getting
frightened is bad for my pitch.
What are you doing up so early?
- Just thought we'd get some...
- Breakfast!
All right, so, I unlocked the pantry.
Your cereal's in there.
You know how to get it.
I'm not your servant. All right?
I am obliged to prepare two meals
a day, that's lunch and dinner.
Friday!
What?
I said,
"Bruce, what is the day after Thursday?"
- Friday!
- Thanks.
Fine. Get weird on me.
I can handle weird.
Okay, I don't need your attitude
about setting the table, okay?
Don't be lazy.
It needs cinnamon.
Or is it cinnamon that Carl's allergic to?
Well, one way to find out, I guess.
Let's see him harmonize
with a tongue the size of a beehive.
Wait! You just reminded me
of this really funny story.
I was walking and I stepped on a bee
and it stung me.
So then, I went and took care of my foot,
then I went back for the bee
to throw it outside and I thought,
"You know, I'd be safe because
bees can't sting you more than once."
Right? I mean, right? It was crazy.
I mean, isn't that crazy?
Excuse me.
You owe me 30 seconds of my life,
and I will collect.
Thanks for the heart attack.
Of course I checked in there,
maybe they're in the kids' room.
Carl, did you eat the bacon?
Stay close, Friday.
Did I leave my whitening strips in here?
He'd usually be here by now.
You know, maybe he can't hear it.
It's mealtime.
He could hear it on the moon.
He's probably just wandering around.
Friday! Friday!
- What are we gonna do?
- Come on. Friday!
Friday! Come on!
Maybe he ran down this alley.
Friday!
You don't think he went in there,
do you?
No. Why would he go in there?
He's probably just out looking for food.
Friday!
How cute. I want one.
Nice haircut.
Thanks, Dave.
I was hoping you'd notice.
Oh, I was actually
talking about the Pomeranian.
But yours is, yours is really nice, too.
- You did something new to it.
- I did.
And I'm pretty sure you could tell
when I first got it done
because you kind of looked at me
and then looked away,
and then looked back like,
"Hey, something's different."
But then you didn't say anything
and I was like, "Men."
So then the next day I tried
to compliment you on your hair,
you know,
giving you a little hint here but...
No, absolutely. I totally remember that.
Anyways, it looks great.
Can I help you?
No, no, we're just looking for our dog.
I don't suppose you've seen him,
have you?
No.
Friday? That's a funny name.
I bet when you find him, you'll say,
"Thank God it's Friday."
Right? It's a joke. So...
I don't think
I've ever seen you around here before.
- Do you go to Thomas Jefferson?
- I will actually, in the fall. Andi.
Dave.
My family just moved here
a couple of months ago.
That's cool. How do you like it so far?
What's not to like?
- We have to go.
- No problem.
You know, if he doesn't show up soon,
you might want to check the pound.
- Friday! Friday! There he is!
- There he is.
- There he is.
- There he is! Friday! Friday!
- Your dog?
- Yeah, that's our dog!
Yeah, he just got in.
Yeah, I know, we just saw him.
Well, I'm always glad
when these things have a happy ending.
We're open till 6:00. Get your parents,
come back, we'll figure it out.
Wait! Wait...
Come on, we're already here.
It's our dog.
Yeah, well, there's a lot of paperwork.
Grown-up paperwork.
There's always a guy
who screws up the paperwork.
But you see this guy? I'm not that guy.
We can't let him out alone anymore.
I mean, if he gets picked up again,
we might not get him back.
And things are gonna get
so much harder when school starts.
Look, Bruce, I think we need
to find Friday a new home.
- Well, you know, I've got a few ideas.
- No.
We've been hiding him
in alleys and garages,
in the woods for three years.
Don't you think he deserves
a real home with a real family?
But we are a real family.
Let's get out of here.
- You kids! Hold it right there!
- We can't get in trouble again.
- But we didn't do anything wrong.
- You want to tell them that?
Oh, my God.
- Friday! No! Get back here!
- Bruce!
Come on.
- You got anything?
- No.
Forget it.
Let's just find Friday
and get out of here.
Friday!
Circuits are fried.
Friday!
Bruce, stay close.
Wow. Andi, look at all this stuff.
Careful.
Friday?
Friday, where are you, boy?
- What's that?
- It's just an old hotel.
Hotels don't make footsteps.
People make footsteps when they walk
through hotels with their feet.
Good point. Come on!
Go, go, go!
Friday, stay back.
Do you think they belong to anyone?
If they did, would they be here?
Better here than the pound.
Friday! Wait!
- Look at that.
- Okay.
What about just, you know,
leaving Friday with them tonight?
One night.
Good night, guys. Sleep tight.
So I mean it's supposed to be
a teacher appreciation lunch, right?
But then it ends up
being more work for us
if we have to set it up
and then clean it up.
I mean, sometimes, you know,
I could appreciate
a little less appreciation, you know?
Don't nod and "Mmm-hmm" me.
I taught you the nod and "Mmm-hmm."
Yeah, that's true,
but I'd like to think I've made it my own.
Oh, really?
- What's wrong?
- It's these kids, the other night.
- Andi and Bruce?
- Yeah.
- Are they okay?
- I don't know.
I mean, it's bad enough
they lost their parents.
If they can't work this situation out,
I don't know if we're gonna be able
to find a family
that's gonna take the both of them.
You do everything you can for them,
you know.
You can't bring home
your work and let it make you crazy.
- You're right.
- Yeah.
- Love you.
- Love you, too.
It's too bad.
You know, they really are good kids.
It's three hungry dogs.
Grab as much as you can.
That's quite a load there.
Yeah. Just getting some breakfast.
What, are you feeding
the whole neighborhood?
Okay, you wouldn't even touch this
the first time.
I don't eat, you're angry.
I eat, you're angry.
Okay, fine, people, eat.
Lucky for you I saved your dinners.
You can start with those.
Come on.
What is that?
You know, if you would eat
the meals I make,
you wouldn't be so hungry
in the morning.
You're right. Thank you so much, Lois.
Done.
I'm hearing something.
What?
- What's his problem?
- I don't know. Why are you asking me?
Stop howling, please.
Yes, I'd like to call in a complaint
about a howling dog.
That's it?
All that just so
you could look out a window?
Never mind.
Wow. Even Lenny
and Georgia won't touch it.
We need to go get
some real dog food for them.
Wait, who?
Lenny and Georgia.
That's what I named the new dogs.
No. No naming them.
If you name them,
you're gonna get attached.
Andi, look at her.
Tell me she's not a Georgia.
Bruce, I'm not kidding, okay?
I'm glad
that Friday's getting along well with
dog number one and dog number two,
but we're barely keeping our dog safe.
I mean, do you know what happens
if we get caught in here?
Trespassing, breaking and entering.
You heard what Bernie said.
They'd split us up and ship us off.
Are you even listening?
So I'll stay here and keep them quiet
while you go out
and get some real food. Okay?
Okay, fine. But just for now.
And I'll be back.
Stay, Friday. Stay, Georgia.
You better keep them quiet.
You like to fetch.
- Hey. I see you found your dog.
- Yeah. He's fine.
That's great.
- Can I help you find anything?
- No, just getting some dog food.
- That's 40 pounds, by the way.
- Yeah, that's probably right.
For that little dog on the flier,
40 pounds?
Well, the thing is, I actually...
I have three dogs,
two of them are strays.
- My parents, they just love animals.
- That's great.
Yeah. You know, they're the best.
I'm really lucky.
We have this big yard
and we just rescue dogs all the time.
- All the time?
- Well, yeah, whenever.
You know what? Here, come with me.
- They're so cute.
- Yeah.
We adopt out dogs here,
but we can't get anybody
to take these guys.
They're not puppies anymore,
and everybody always wants puppies.
Tell me about it.
They're also kind of...
Well, they're loveably defective.
Cooper, he's my favorite.
I think he's actually half goat.
There's not a substance on Earth
he can't chew through.
He's been through pocketbooks,
cell phones, shoes, handbags,
even ate through a license plate once.
This is Shep.
Yeah, she's got some herding issues.
- Pushy.
- I like pushy.
So, they've got quirks.
I mean, they're still adorable.
Good, I'm glad you think so,
because you're taking them.
What? No.
The owner says
we can't keep them forever
and if I can't find a place to put them,
then they're going to the pound.
Look, I'm sorry,
but there's no way that I can just...
You're already taking care
of a few strays, what's three more?
- Three?
- Oh, yeah. You're gonna love this guy.
Romeo. Romeo. Romeo.
Whoa.
What if you just took them
for a little while?
Until I can figure something out.
I'll pay for food.
I get an employee discount.
It's the least I can do.
Georgia, I'm sorry, but I can't stand here
all day playing fetch with you.
Georgia, zip it.
No.
Guys, come on! Please! Oh, no!
What's it gonna take for me
to get you guys to...
Sweet ride.
Yeah, it's pretty much a chick magnet.
I'm not gonna lie to you.
Getting close. Right there. That's it.
This is where you live?
Actually, my parents are out of town,
so I kind of had to make
other arrangements.
This place looks condemned.
What are we doing here?
It's where we keep the dogs.
- Well, are you allowed to be in there?
- No, so let's move it.
All right, guys, watch this.
Ready?
Are you sure it's safe in here?
Yeah. We've been poking around here
for a couple of days, actually.
Okay, that hurt.
Hold your fire. Hold your fire.
Bruce, you remember Dave, right?
Dave from the pet store.
Hi, Dave.
He just needed a place
to keep a couple of dogs
and I thought, you know,
"Hey, we have a place."
So you made this?
Yeah. It's a work in progress.
And how did you learn
how to make that?
My dad.
Wouldn't it be easier
just to throw it, though?
Yeah, but that's not really the point.
The point is when I get it working,
she should be able to play fetch
even when we're not here.
Can you give me free pay-per-view?
Oh, poop!
Literally!
What is going on here?
I mean, who poops on the floor?
- Sorry. I need to work on that.
- How did you find us?
I followed the van
with the ears and the tail.
You're not gonna tell anyone, are you?
Why would I tell?
I'm gonna help you guys.
- Really?
- Yeah.
I love dogs, and there's a lot more
to taking care of them
than throwing a stick and feeding them.
You guys need me.
I say she's in.
Okay. I mean,
how much trouble can they be?
Come on, guys.
Do you really think we can do this,
like, every day?
Yeah, why not? This is a piece of cake.
- Guys, come back! Come back!
- Guys, stop. Stop, stop, stop.
Treat! Who wants a treat?
Friday, no! Where is Romeo?
Okay, Heather, you go that way,
I'll go this way.
Aren't we supposed
to be wearing them out?
This is totally normal.
- Oh, so you think this is funny?
- No, no, not at all.
Actually, I was just about to thank you
for reminding me to watch where I...
...step.
You know, I think we might
be in a little over our heads.
It's 4-6, we're outdogged.
Guys, it's really not that bad.
I mean, if you look at it,
dogs have three basic needs.
That's eating, sleeping
and then peeing and pooping.
- That's four.
- No, I think peeing and pooping's one.
I've stepped in both,
and I'd have to disagree.
Look, guys, I'm serious.
I really think I can make this work.
How?
What do you think?
Thanks.
No, no, no, no. No.
Ready?
That's disgusting.
That has to be the grossest thing
I've ever seen.
That's awesome.
We just wandered in here.
I'm not really sure what that thing was.
Don't worry. I'm not gonna tell anyone.
In fact, if you let me,
I'd love to help you guys.
I just work down the street, you know,
I could keep an eye on the fuzz,
could run interference,
massage your shoulders.
- Okay, easy there, tiger.
- Yeah.
Thanks for the offer,
but I think we got it under control.
Could I have a word with you?
All right. I've got to be honest.
I'm at a critical point
in my social development
and those are two fine-looking,
hot women you have behind you,
and let's face it,
you can't date them both.
So, who do you have dibs on?
Dibs? I don't have dibs, per se.
Gotcha.
Name's Mark.
Hi, Mark. You're on poop duty.
Okay. So, how many dogs
are we talking here?
- Just six.
- Seven.
What is that?
Actually, this is the newest member
of our family.
This is Henry.
The poor guy was scrounging for food
in the junkyard.
- Bruce, that...
- Andi.
Honestly, we have enough room.
We could take one more.
One more? We can fit, like, 10 more.
Think about that.
Oh, yeah,
why don't we just wander the streets
and rescue every stray we see?
That was funny.
Dispatch to 22. We have a stray
on Saint Andrews and Sixth.
Saint Andrews and Sixth.
Okay, guys, we've got a stray
on Saint Andrews and Sixth.
That's Saint Andrews and Sixth.
It's right near the pound, so hurry.
Hello? Hi. Sorry to bother you.
We were wondering
if we could have a minute of your time.
- Not interested.
- We work for the school newspaper
and we would love an interview.
All right. You know what?
I don't have time for this.
You guys just get out of here.
Skedaddle and play somewhere else.
Okay.
What's the matter?
Never seen a husky kid
in a hoodie before?
All right, guys,
get over to the old railroad depot ASAP.
Over there. That's them.
- He's stuck.
- Is she hurt?
That's so sweet. They stayed together.
You okay?
You're safe now.
We're gonna take care of you guys.
Give me paw.
There's that white one again.
Let's get him.
Here, doggy. Here, doggy.
All right, come on, guys.
You're being rescued.
Here, dog.
Hey, come back here, you mangy mutt.
Hey! Come back here.
All right, come on! Come on, everybody.
Come on. Come on. Come on.
- Head to tail. Head to tail. Come on.
- Come on. Get across, guys.
Go, go, go!
Come on, trust it.
You can do it. Come on. Come on.
Good boy.
Passengers loaded.
- Heading back to base.
- Copy that.
- One, two, three, go!
- Okay. Okay. Go!
- Wait!
- Oh, what's that?
Hey, what is this? What's going on?
- Thumb war.
- Thumb war? Any calls?
Nothing.
Where are all the dogs?
Thank you for riding the simulator.
Please exit for the next customer.
Out!
Next.
And please keep your paws
inside the vehicle at all times.
Come on. Come on. Come on.
There's gotta be something
you like to do.
Go get her. Go get her.
I'll get it.
- Bernie.
- Oh, hey, Bernie.
Excellent. Bernie.
Carl, Lois, I'm gonna borrow the kids
for a second, is that okay?
I don't know if you heard, but Lois and I
got a gig this weekend. Paid.
Wow. Really?
I'm gonna RSVP you and the missus
as a yes, right?
I'm not sure that I'm actually gonna
be able to make it.
What about that friend of yours
that owns the club?
Oh, yeah, he's definitely gonna be there.
Yeah? Excellent.
- I told you.
- Yeah.
- So what is this emergency?
- Who cares? At least we're out of there.
They were about to start band practice.
- Hey, what's up?
- Hey, Jason.
Hey, guys, I think I may have found
the perfect foster parents for you.
- Perfect?
- They're perfect.
They had two foster kids
that just went off to college
and they're looking for two more,
and I think
you guys are really gonna love them.
So that's it, no more Carl and Lois.
You guys get packed, you're out of here.
Thank you, Bernie. Thank you.
Best part about it is
it's only three hours away.
You guys are free.
- What?
- That far?
Yes. What's the problem?
- Well, we really like the area.
- We've made a lot of great friends.
Yeah, and you know, Carl and Lois'
singing really grows on you.
You hate Carl and Lois.
Guys, what's going on?
I mean, they want to make you
a part of their family.
Look, we appreciate
everything you've done, but...
Guys, you're not gonna get
another chance like this.
I really think you should go.
We'd like to stay.
Well, I...
I have no idea what you guys are doing.
We're really sorry.
We're doing the right thing,
aren't we, Friday?
Hey. What's up, puppy.
Is everything okay?
Yeah, yeah, just... Just looking.
- You come up here a lot, huh?
- Yeah.
I'm just guessing this is the kind of view
I wouldn't be able to afford
if this place were a real hotel.
So, what are you doing tomorrow night?
Sneaking out,
serving 60 pounds of kibble,
maybe mopping up some drool.
'Cause a friend of mine
is having this party
and you could come and meet some
people you'll be going to school with.
The keyword here really being "people."
Good point.
Great. So, where should I pick you up?
Why don't you just tell me where it is?
I can meet you there.
All right.
That's dinner.
- Hey, guys.
- You guys ready for dinner?
Are you hungry, buddy?
Smells great.
- Oh, thank you.
- You're welcome.
Thanks.
- Thanks.
- You're welcome.
So, Heather,
it's kind of like a dinner date, isn't it?
To us. To a real family.
- To us.
- To us.
- Cheers!
- To us.
Let's eat.
If cartoon birds and mice were ever
going to make me a dress for the ball,
now would be a good time.
- How long are you gonna be gone?
- A few hours, maybe. It's just a party.
What if anything goes wrong?
Bruce, you can handle it.
You can handle anything.
I mean, have you stopped
and looked around the hotel?
I could disappear for a week
and you'd be able
to keep everything running.
Yeah, but you're not gonna
disappear for a week, right?
Of course not.
Now, if you could just build me a dress,
then you'd be a real wizard.
You should check out room 502.
You look... Wow, you...
You look gorgeous.
What, this old thing?
Here, come on in.
Let me show you around.
No! No, Lois!
That's my personal, that's...
- So what else have you stolen?
- Nothing.
- So you admit you did steal it.
- Never said that, Lois.
You might as well tell the truth.
Do you really think
you could outsmart us?
I'd rather not answer that question, Carl.
- I love your dress.
- Thanks.
Marianne, this is Andi.
She's gonna be going to school
with us next year.
- Nice to meet you.
- Andi.
- Hey, Jason.
- Hey.
- How you doing?
- All right.
- You guys already know each other?
- Yeah, it's Andi, right?
Do I know you from somewhere?
Yeah, you live in my grandmother's
building with the Scudders.
No, I'm over on Oak.
I have one of those faces, though.
No, you live with the Scudders.
Come on, help me out here,
I'm not crazy.
They're your foster parents,
you and your little brother... Barry.
- Bruce?
- Bruce, Bruce, Bruce. That's it, Bruce.
Andi, what is he talking about?
Oh, my God, you guys, it's no big deal.
So I guess the Scudders have been
foster parents before, big deal.
They're also our aunt and uncle.
We're just staying with them
while our parents are traveling in China,
and we just call them our parents
because it is easier
than talking about
this whole long boring story, okay?
I'm thirsty, anyone else?
Anyone?
Andi, I...
Andi!
- Did you get a hold of Bernie yet?
- I'm on hold!
Well, tell them it's an emergency.
Tell them I'm being stolen from.
Tell who? I'm on hold!
Don't think this means that...
You let him get away!
Friday?
- Hurry up!
- I'm wearing heels!
Well, so am I!
- I can't believe they own a hotel.
- Oh, God, Carl, you're such an idiot!
Stay close to me, baby.
What was that?
Don't answer it.
Hey, that's my wah-wah pedal.
No wonder my sound's been off.
Yeah, that's why.
This crap is amazing.
Yeah, 'cause it's our crap.
They've been robbing us blind.
Good girl. Drop it! Georgia, drop it!
- Bruce, Bruce!
- Let go. Georgia, let go of it!
- Drop it, please!
- Bruce!
What happened?
Don't ask.
What happened with you?
Oh, no!
- Let's get out of here. Where's the exit?
- Like I left bread crumbs.
Quick, guys, go, go!
- Put the lights back on!
- I didn't do it!
What is that?
- I don't know. Let's get out of here!
- Oh, God! Shut it!
Are you sure they said
it was coming from here?
Don't know.
Let's check upstairs.
- Did you hear the cops?
- I don't know.
Oh, good.
Well, if those were cops,
we're gonna turn them in ourselves,
'cause I smell reward.
I don't think that's reward you smell.
Where are we?
We're in deep doo-doo.
Okay. Stop breathing like that.
No. No.
- No.
- Don't.
Get them in there.
No! What are you doing? Friday!
You can't do this! No! Friday!
- Bruce!
- Friday!
Friday! Let go of me! That's my dog!
Bruce! Just go!
It's okay.
- Thanks.
- You're welcome.
- We're in a lot of trouble, aren't we?
- Yeah.
But Bernie's doing
everything he can to help. Okay?
Look, is there any way
that they could just stay with you
for a little while longer
until I can find a family that'll take them?
Not a chance. God knows
how much they've stolen from us.
We have a lot of very rare
and valuable items in our home, okay?
And we are gonna go
and do a full inventory
and we're letting you know, all right?
This is an outrage. An outrage!
I'm suing you. I'm suing those kids.
I'm suing the state.
I'm suing the guy
that invented shrink wrap.
I'm suing everyone!
So you're gonna send us
to that other house now, right?
That nice couple?
- Bruce...
- Bruce, we're gonna be fine.
I'll take care of it. Don't worry.
Come on, Bernie.
You have to help us, please.
Bruce needs me.
He's gonna get chewed up out there.
Andi, I'm sorry, okay?
There's nothing I can do about it.
You can't separate us, okay?
Don't punish him
just because I screwed things up.
Listen, the best thing you can do
for Bruce right now
is let him have a fresh start.
I'm sorry.
Can't I just say one thing to my sister?
Look, Andi, don't worry about me, okay?
I'm gonna be fine.
I was supposed to keep us together.
I was supposed to protect us.
Andi, we had to protect the dogs.
If I had to do it over again,
I'd do the exact same thing.
First come, first served!
- Tomorrow morning for all of them.
- Yep.
- We're gonna be busy.
- I can use the overtime.
And which one are you?
They must have left you behind.
You're the lucky one.
Come here, buddy.
I know how to sit,
how to fetch and how to roll over.
What I don't know
is how I ended up in here.
Could you please turn that off?
- Please.
- I did turn it off.
Hey!
- You busy?
- Friday!
Oh, good boy. Good boy.
So what's the plan?
The dogs have less than a day left.
We've got to get them out of there now.
Okay, that's really
more a goal than a plan.
There's a no-kill shelter outside the city,
so if we can get them out of the pound
and over the county line,
then they're home free.
- Right.
- But we gotta move quick.
Andi, what happens to us?
It's...
Look, Bruce, it's not gonna be good.
We're gonna be in more trouble
than we've ever been in.
But we're gonna save the dogs.
It's what we're supposed to do, right?
Okay, guys.
Okay, so here's the pound,
and this is the county line,
and this is what we're gonna do.
Are we ready?
Let's do this!
Got sausage.
Fire! Fire! Fire! Hello?
When a young girl is screaming for help
and yelling, "Fire,"
- you're supposed to get moving!
- I have water.
Fire! Hello?
- Where?
- And they say chivalry is dead.
It's right over there.
Hey!
A bunch of kids eager to adopt, I bet.
- Where are the keys?
- There!
You didn't think we'd forget you,
did you?
Come on! Let's go. Come on.
I missed you guys, too.
Come on. Let's go! Come on!
Let's go, Shep! Come on, let's go!
- Let's go for a run, you guys, come on!
- Go, go, go!
Checking out.
We're gonna get you guys out of here.
Come on.
Hurry up, Thor, gotta go!
Let's go, let's go!
Way to go, Shep! Good girl.
Okay, the coast is clear.
Bring her on back.
What's going on here?
I know you. All right, let's go.
You're going to jail.
Trouble! Trouble!
We can do this hard or we can do it
easy. Let's go, missy. Come on.
Keep your paws off of her.
Heather, save yourself!
Save yourself! Go! I have him!
Nobody's going anywhere.
Get back in there.
Keys.
Hey!
Okay, Friday,
you're gonna lead the pack.
- Mark!
- Yes?
Thank you!
Come on, Friday. A little faster, buddy!
You can do it!
Follow the sausage, Friday.
Follow the sausage!
- Well, that went well.
- Yeah, well, we're not done yet.
Come on, Friday, lead your pack!
Good boy!
Come on, guys, follow the meat!
Come on! That's it, Friday, let's go.
Oh, that's not good.
Hey!
- You guys, are we there yet?
- We're almost there, just up ahead.
Wait. What? Oh, no!
Friday!
Guys, come back! This way!
Problem. They just went the other way.
What?
Where are they going?
Home. They're going home.
Block the exits.
Make sure they don't get back out.
Let's get some more
Animal Control out here.
- How much?
- All of it.
We need all available Animal Control
units. All available Animal Control units.
It is pure bedlam down here
as authorities try
to take control of the situation.
This scheme was supposedly
the work of several juvenile delinquents.
Upstairs, right now, let's go!
There's no need to get upset, Officer.
Animal Control is on the scene.
All right, everybody,
if you can just let us do our job,
we'll have all these
dangerous canines rounded up
and out of your hair presently.
- Stop!
- Can I get through here?
- Watch out. Please?
- Excuse me, ma'am. Excuse me.
Oh, no, no, no, no! Not you again!
- Those dogs belong to us.
- They're family.
Yeah, we're not gonna let you
coverall-wearing goons
take them away from us.
And you can put that in your report.
Officer, would you please arrest
these young felons right now
- so we can get back to work?
- Fine! Just leave the dogs alone!
Andi! There he is!
That's our dog!
You can't just take him away!
- Oh, what do we got here? A puppy!
- Just leave my dog alone!
Stop!
- Okay. Now, who are you?
- I'm Bernie Wilkins.
Social Services.
Okay, get them out of here!
Come on, listen.
Can you just hear me out
before you throw these kids in jail
and destroy all these innocent dogs?
I see no reason
why we can't hear both sides.
Look. I'm responsible for these kids,
and I know what they did was wrong.
But I gotta tell you,
I wish I had the guts to do what they did.
I've been trying to place kids
in good homes for 15 years
and most of the time,
I'm not successful.
But these kids,
they didn't make excuses.
They didn't get frustrated
with the system and give up.
They just went out and did it.
They saved everybody.
They created their own little family.
You call this a family? A bunch
of mangy strays in an old hotel?
"Madison."
Madison.
Madison.
"August 3rd,
"found hiding in a backyard after the
family moved away and left her behind."
Viola and Sebastian, the twins.
"Together since they were puppies.
"Viola got snagged on a fence,
"but Sebastian refused
to leave his sister behind."
"Chelsea.
"Chelsea lost her leg in an accident.
"The owner didn't pay the bill
and abandoned her at the vet."
"Coco, Rocky and Harley.
"Found living together
in the woods near a dump."
And there's many more.
"Ginger.
"Henry, Romeo, Juliet.
"Cooper.
"Shep.
"George"? Does that say "George"?
Georgia! Her name's Georgia.
And Lenny.
Georgia and Lenny.
They're the first two residents
in this hotel.
The Hotel for Dogs.
No one was turned away
when they needed a home.
Nobody was abandoned
when they were looking for a family.
Are you really gonna tell me that
we're gonna just abandon them now?
They don't look like
mangy strays, Officer.
But you don't mind
if we take a look upstairs, do you?
I think it's in the public's best interest.
Be my guest.
- You did great.
- You don't think I was too pushy?
I like pushy.
- Mark?
- Heather.
So, is this when the hero gets the girl?
Baby steps.
Do you mind if I...
No. Okay, sorry.
You kids are heroes.
You should be proud.
- Thank you.
- Thanks.
Yeah, but the bad news is, in all this,
I still haven't been able to find a foster
family that's willing to take you guys.
That's okay, Bernie,
we know you tried your best.
But the good news is,
I have found some real parents
that might be willing to adopt.
- Adopt?
- Yeah.
See, the mom is excellent.
She's a teacher,
so she's really great with kids.
And he cannot cook to save his life.
And he shouts during football games
like the players can actually hear him.
But he has a great heart.
Wait a minute.
Do they like dogs?
We love dogs.
Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen.
I'd like to welcome you
to the Hotel for Dogs.
Thanks to the generosity
of the entire city,
we are now able to take care
of all your canine needs.
Thank you, Georgia.
Room 320 is now available.
I'm sorry, Georgia, I forgot your tip.
Good girl. Thanks, Georgia.
Whether you are here to board or adopt,
please note we are a green hotel.
Hi, Cooper.
Cooper, get back to work.
Remember to stop by
our nursery and dog care center
and meet the wonderful pups
available for adoption.
Hi.
Tired doggies can rejuvenate
and refresh at our spa.
We offer everything
from soothing shiatsu massages
to cleansing facials.
And after a healthy workout session,
come visit our beauty salon
to take care of fur styles
and pamper your paws.
We feature a variety of activities
for every dog.
For those 18 dog years and older,
we are proud to present
quality entertainment
in the exclusive Hound Lounge.
- Ruff, ruff, ruff
- Ruff, ruff, ruff
I need a little treat
- Ruff, ruff, ruff
- Ruff, ruff, ruff
- Who's gonna buy me something to eat?
- Something to eat?
Okay, who wants well-done?
Because they're all well done.
- Yes, well, we know. It's his one flaw.
- One flaw?
Hey, I can hear you. I'm right here.