Hubcap (2023) Movie Script

(film reel clicking)
(twangy country music)
- [Secretary] Oh, JJ
wants you to drop by today.
- Crap.
I'll go now.
- You got the high school.
- [Sheriff] That's today?
- Can't bowl on Thursday, PTA meeting.
Your speech.
(bluesy music)
- Whoo! Now that's a cowboy.
- You like rodeos?
Semper Fi.
(can clatters)
- Hey, stay in the goddamn car, alright?
(bluesy rock music)
- Let's have a big hand for his daughter,
Sheriff Rainy Lawson.
(audience applauds)
(dramatic music)
(pensive music)
- Think I can make it?
Not bad, huh?
(audience applauds)
- You retired his jersey?
- What do you see in this asshole anyway?
- He ain't so bad.
- He ain't so good either is he?
- It says something
about the character of
my father that this town
still remembers him fondly enough
to give him this great honor.
What position do you play, Jake?
(audience laughs)
- Quarterback.
Did I say something funny?
- Uh ma'am, Jake is sort
of famous around here.
Hey, get the fuck away from my car.
- Well, if this town knew how
little I know about football,
then I'd have never been elected.
- Get the fuck back, crip.
- You get the fuck back.
- Joey!
Leave him be.
- You want me to take your little ass
and throw you in that
fucking dumpster over there?
- Try it.
(tense music)
(baton thuds)
(metal clangs)
- Fuck.
- Get outta the car.
You can get outta the car.
Get outta the car.
- Get outta the way.
- [Vet] Get outta the car.
- Get outta the fuckin'
Hey, get outta the way.
- Get in here.
- What do you think you're doing?
- [Vet] You can get outta the the car.
- [Joey] Get outta the way.
(engine revs)
- [Vet] Get outta the car.
- [Joey] I said get back.
(car banging)
(tense music)
(vet groans)
- (sighs) Rest easy, Lieutenant Dan.
Damn shame about Lieutenant Dan.
- Do you know his real name?
- I believe he was a Stinchcomb.
Lady said it was an older red sporty car.
- Would you take care of that please?
- Yeah.
- [Rainy] Folks, would you please
get back behind the gas pumps?
(hubcap clangs)
- Yay!
- What the? Go get that!
Come on.
(unsettling music)
Come on.
(pensive music)
- [Poole] Okay.
- Okay, we have everything.
Can you see if you can locate a relative?
- Yeah, I think that.
- Well, where's the hubcap?
- I, I, I put it right there.
- Check the dumpster again.
- Look, I put it right on that table.
You know when I was carrying it,
it kind of twitched like a, like a...
- What are you saying, Poole?
It didn't just walk away.
(upbeat music)
I gotta go by JJ's.
Wanna keep me company?
- I um, sure.
Yeah. I'll come along.
- Seriously?
- Yeah.
I'll be right back.
Well, you asked me to write you a speech.
- Dedicated to the
proposition that being cute,
could get a girl through math class.
- You were cute and I remember
helping you with math.
You were here, what, two years?
- Freshman year and
half my sophomore year.
- Your mom passed what, your senior year?
- Week after I graduated.
(gentle music)
- Right? Just pull over.
- I forgot his birthday.
- No, his birthday's next week.
So this is the day that he uh,
well, and it's the day
that he offered me the job 20 years ago.
Come on.
I'll wait here.
- You big chicken.
(Poole chuckles)
- [JJ] Look,
there in the tree line.
How anyone could kill such
beautiful creatures is beyond me.
- Well some hunt to put food on the table.
- Montel, would you get
the sheriff something?
Sweet tea?
- Water will be fine.
- So, I would like you to attend
a luncheon with me tomorrow.
- Lester will be there. You know him.
And we have approved funds
to hire a new deputy.
- She wants to hire the Black woman.
- Who?
That Detroit homicide detective.
- She's a grandmother.
- Since when has diversity
been important to Republicans?
- It's got something to do with money.
You can bet on that.
(upbeat music)
- [Larry] Run! Run!
- Goodnight, Rainy.
- Goodnight, Poole
(rock music)
- Somebody die here today?
- Well, we sent him to
the coroner, so I hope so.
Y'all staying outta trouble?
- Yes ma'am.
- Okay.
- Damn, I'd hit that.
- She looks kinda like a man.
- Your mom kinda looks like a man.
- [Larry] A couple years ago
she really looked like a dude.
- What happened?
- That crippled guy got run over.
Hey, listen to this.
(engine revs to life)
This morning it just
made a chunking sound.
Took me four times to get it to crank.
- It's your starter. 80 bucks.
- You'll help me change it?
- Sure. Two bolts.
- Hey, we got a party at
the barn Friday night.
Drop by.
- Sure.
- Why'd you invite the nerd boy?
- Shut up.
Montel knows cars.
- You know they only TeePee the popular girls.
- (laughs) Daddy's still pissed.
- He'll get over it.
Have a good night.
(unsettling music)
(engine revs)
(car horn honks)
(phone vibrates)
What's up, Poole?
- [Poole] Fred Stinchcomb, army vet.
Lost the use of his legs
in the first Iraq war.
Friendly fire hit his Bradley.
Used to have long hair.
That's why everyone
called him Lieutenant Dan,
you know like from Forest Gump?
- Look, stay on the outside.
- I promise.
(upbeat music)
- Don't, don't you wanna
talk or, or something first?
- You know how pretty you look?
You're running outside of your dreams
The vivid image lies beneath
- Jake!
You promised.
- I promise I won't do it again.
I promise.
- Okay.
- You do look pretty.
Come here.
Your unplugged mind is on stage three
- [Rainy] Damn it, Lawson.
- Jake, no!
I said no!
(hubcap clangs)
(girl screams)
Marching to the right side of the sun
(girl whimpers)
- Help.
- EMTs picked him up, but the
young man's cut up pretty bad.
(bright music)
- The deputy suggested the hubcap?
- He said "Could it be a hubcap?"
- You didn't see anyone?
- I was scared.
You know what Jake was trying to-
- But you weren't ready to-
- Yeah, right.
I told him to stop.
That's when the hubcap attacked.
Like, like it was trying to protect me.
- I'm gonna give you
something to protect you.
Gladys, do you have copies of the resumes
you sent to Jacky?
- Oh yeah. In the Jacky folder.
- What is this one doing in the folder?
- Oh, you told me to put all
the qualified candidates in-
- I said she was overqualified.
- She's qualified.
I put it there. That's
where I thought you wanted.
- If you're confused
about what I want or mean,
ask me a question.
- Excuse me.
- Want me to talk to the quarterback?
Jock to jock.
- I got this.
Chapman, try standing closer to the razor.
- Maybe Black or Mexican.
It was dark.
- And he attacked you with?
- I was trying to protect Sarah.
- Doctor, do you have a report?
- Yeah. Right here.
Pretty severe cut on his right hand.
And possible nerve damage.
- Is that your passing hand, Jake?
- Yes ma'am.
(upbeat music)
- Well, did she say anything
about it being a hubcap
before you asked her?
- She said it was silver.
- Silver sword, silver tire tool?
- I mighta said it.
It was on that table
and then it disappeared.
Where did it go?
- They were on sale two for one.
You really think it was the hubcap?
- Look, it pulsed in my hand.
Like, like...
Alright, so now we have a
200 pound brown assailant.
That make you happy?
- Chapman, run a DMV check and get a list
of all older model red sporty
cars registered in the county.
- What if it ain't in this county?
- Well, we'll start here
and then work our way out.
Poole, if you were missing a
hubcap, where would you go?
- The Hubcap Store in Pickens.
- Check it out, Poole,
there's a possessed tire.
(trailer clattering)
Looking for your hubcap?
(Rainy snickers)
(happy music)
- [Coach] If
there's nerve damage there,
then that there is a worry.
- [Interviewer] Any idea who attacked him?
- [Coach] Hey, you'd
have to ask the police that.
- [Interviewer] Well
they say it was a hubcap.
- [Coach] Yeah, that
girl sheriff is investigating.
- [Interviewer] Yeah,
that's Sheriff Lawson.
Jake Kinnard, folks,
is attacked by a hubcap
and the cowboys' season is in jeopardy.
Let's hope Sheriff Lawson's out there
looking for the attacker.
We had her on our morning
show and she's a real looker.
- [Coach] She's
a real pack of crackers.
[Interviewer] Pack of-
(Poole laughs)
- Stupid.
(upbeat music)
All right
(knocking at door)
- You ever get anybody in here
looking to buy one hubcap?
- Yeah.
We sell hubcaps.
- How about looking to buy a hubcap
for an older red sporty car?
- Frankie, we got anybody in here
looking for a hubcap for a red sports car?
- We had that LeMans yesterday.
- That's a white Pontiac.
What other kind of car are you looking for
besides a red one?
- Older, sporty.
- Here's my card.
Gimme a call if someone
does come asking for one.
- Sure.
Hey there, Sheriff.
Got your cowboy right here.
You like rodeos?
- [Poole] So, I'm taking you to the rodeo?
- Girls learn early how to turn down boys.
- How to lie, you mean.
- He's a voter!
(unsettling music)
- You know what puzzles
me about this case?
Why that girl would not give
it up to the quarterback.
- Stop that.
Sarah's sweet.
- But he's the quarterback
for Gosh sakes.
That used to count for something.
Barbecue for lunch?
- Oh no, I have a luncheon with JJ.
- 290 Jobs.
- It means $20 million for Gibson County.
The prison's going on land you own?
- Several of us own the land.
Lester, how much do you have?
- 17 Acres. Give or take.
- What are you asking of me?
- Nothing.
We just don't want you to oppose it.
- Your daddy wanted to have
the only jail in this county.
- No, I think he was just
against for-profit prisons.
- Your daddy was the
last of a dying breed.
Trump took 73% of this county.
You're smart.
You could be the next Republican sheriff
- I think I did okay
running as a Democrat.
- Sweetheart, you had
sympathy on your side.
This county is red.
Wouldn't it be nice to run
without any opposition?
- What's the catch?
- No catch, but-
- Your daddy had a reputation
for being soft on drug users.
"Some people call them criminals.
I call them constituents."
- Sounds like Daddy.
- We have a real problem now.
It's not moonshine, it's meth.
We even have heroin in our county.
- The prison folks just want-
- A law enforcement friendly county.
- What's your background?
- I was a derivatives trader
until the bottom fell out eight years ago.
And I thought, prisons!
- A real growth industry.
- Exactly.
- We also need an
integrated law enforcement.
No Fergusons.
- So you want me to up the drug arrests
using Black deputies?
- It would also be helpful if you
actually wore a gun.
We're rather big on the
Second Amendment here.
- Daddy never wore a gun.
- Your daddy wanted us to be Mayberry.
Gibson County is growing.
Let's grow together.
(upbeat music)
(engine rumbles in the distance)
(upbeat music)
(tires squeal)
- Shit!
(car thuds)
[Rainy] Fuck that.
(pensive music)
- You're lucky.
I pulled your daddy's
truck out two years ago.
- Seat belts save lives.
- Damn right they do.
(hubcap clangs)
- Rookie mistake.
Not gonna catch no
motorcycles on the mountain.
- Aren't you supposed
to be doing something?
How many red sports cars
do you have on the list?
- 27. Before 1990.
- You and Poole ought to be able
to knock those out in two days.
- You said I was taking you.
- I want you two riding together today.
- Oh fun.
- I'm thrilled.
- We should've hired Othello Ellis.
Remember that crazy SOB?
He's policing in Habersham now.
Part of that whole shit
blowing up the kid.
- No knock warrant. That sucked.
- The insurance companies
just try to get the patients
discharged as quickly as possible.
- Yeah, the VA hospital's the same way.
- Were you Army?
- Yeah, Iraq. Two tours.
- [Doctor] Nice.
Larry, you know those are
wheel covers, not hubcaps.
(playful music)
- I told you!
- Shut up.
(unsettling tones)
- I'll take this one.
You get the next one.
- Well, some of the bruises
are consistent with blunt trauma.
Some of the lacerations are consistent
with a sharper object.
But I'd have to see the weapon
to draw any firm conclusions.
- People are making fun of me.
- You gonna be ready when
the season opens, Jake?
- I've got feeling back in all my fingers.
- Well, that's a good sign, right Doc?
- It's a great sign.
- First rule of fight club.
(upbeat music)
Randy, Randy, I love you
Oh, I love you at the
same time I hate you
Oh, I need you and what can I do
When you hurt me
You come around, I can take it
When you're here,
don't have to fake it
- Oh shit.
I'm in your spell, I'm stark naked
Cum as fast as you can
- Your old man home?
I need my handyman
- No.
(metal scraping)
Randy, Randy, you're too hard
Late at night I kill the light
- What took you so long?
- I thought I came pretty quick.
That's it.
(twangy country music)
- No it ain't.
This here's a '66.
It's got a 14 inch rim.
Yours is '65, 13 inch rim.
I ain't got that.
(metal clangs)
- Well can you get it for me?
- Maybe.
You like rodeos?
- Maybe
(upbeat music)
- [Frankie] '65 Ford Mustang hubcap.
- You too damn dumb to
get a license tag number.
- I got something even better.
(knocking at door)
- Hi ma'am.
We're checking vehicle registrations
and there's a red Firebird
registered to this address.
- We're separated.
- Nice ride.
How fast does your daddy let you go?
- He's on the moon.
He's a astronaut.
- I have no idea where he's at.
- No idea?
- Maybe Colorado.
That's where his girlfriend's at.
- Can you do me a favor?
We're looking for a hubcap.
So you see one, you let me know, okay?
- What's a hubcap?
- It's a shiny thing.
Kinda like a big plate.
- I saw a shiny thing.
- You did?
You saw a shiny thing?
- It was rolling.
- [Poole] It was?
Where was it rolling at?
- That way.
- It went that way?
- [Radio] We got the lead from
Hubcap Store in Pickens.
- Lieutenant Dan reincarnated himself
and came back as a hubcap.
- An inanimate object
is spirit possession.
Reincarnation is when you come back
as a, as another living
thing, like an eagle.
Now that's how I'd like to come back.
- You could see through girls windows.
- That's what you would do.
Come back at some peeping
Tom owl or something.
- I'd come back as a Bonobo.
- Bo no what?
- Bonobo. It's an ape.
They just lie around
having sex all day long.
- Right.
- Seriously.
A female bonobo has a man's sex drive.
They'll screw anything.
- Bonobo.
- Bonobo.
(twangy, upbeat music)
- The last time you borrowed it,
you didn't put gas in it.
Well you said you would.
- [Chapman] You got a
girl looking for a hubcap?
- Yep.
- You know the color of the car?
- Nope.
- [Poole] You get her license number?
- Frankie got her phone number.
- Let's call her up and ask
her the color of the car then.
- And why would I do that?
- What's your name?
- I did ask her to the rodeo.
- Can you, I got another call, hold on.
- Hey uh, can't wait for the rodeo.
- Who is this?
- Frankie.
From the store, the Hubcap Store.
- Um, I'm on the other line, so-
- Okay. Right.
Wha, what was the color of that, that car
with the missing hubcap?
- It's uh, it's white.
- White?
I had a real nice policeman
come in here earlier
asking about a red car
with a missing hubcap.
- Well, this one's white.
Can you call me back?
- Oh, just a sec.
Bull riding, it uh, gets me all worked up.
Real passionate and shit.
Does that scare ya?
- No. (laughs)
- Good, good. I like that.
- How worked up do you get?
- Hey, uh hon. I'll call you back.
I greased up those skids
real nice for you, Frankie.
All yours.
- Well, I'm not a idiot.
I told him your car was white.
(unsettling music)
(gunfire sounds)
- [Radio] - Charlie one five
Charlie one five. To Charlie 1-6.
We have an explosion,
multiple casualties. Over.
- No!
- No!
Where'd you sleep at last night?
- Baby!
- Stay out. You ain't coming in here.
- The fuck I ain't.
- You stayed out all night.
You can stay out all day too.
- That's my damn trailer.
- That's your damn truck.
You could stay in it until
you decide you wanna come home
and stay with me.
- Baby.
- Stay out.
- Get the fuck out my way.
(man grunts)
Get off me.
(hubcap slices)
(body thuds)
- It was a hubcap.
(upbeat music)
Wait a day
- Hey. Come on in.
Might as well stay awhile
Here with me
Where the breeze blows
- What's going on?
- Nothing.
Just say now
Time grows shorter
Then we dream
Awake, I scream out loud
Leading, leads us home
Keeps around my soul
Should a quiet spell
Could I fall to tell
Face this face to face
'Neath a quiet place
Hold me tighter still
Tighter still
- The police are looking for you.
You're done.
It's over.
You do not need to get
your fucking bowling ball.
- How do you know Tommy Douglas?
- We played football together.
He's got a few priors on his
record for some small shit.
Pretty much a downhill
skid since high school.
I know his sister real well.
- Oh, spare me the details.
- I'd like to know your details.
- We have nothing in common.
We got Fallujah in common.
You're hot, I'm hot.
And we're both single.
- You work for me!
- That's kind of a turn on.
- And it just waved and I waved back.
But I didn't mean for
it to kill my husband.
I loved him.
- We have a killer hubcap on the loose
in Gibson County, Georgia.
(audience laughs)
I can't make this stuff up.
Yeah, I, I know, right?
It's Georgia.
- Helen goes on for three minutes
about the Gibson killer hubcap.
I've gotten phone calls from
three Atlanta news stations.
- Well, she's been hospitalized six times
as a domestic violence victim.
- Okay, so she killed her husband.
Sweetie, we've got a PR problem.
I wanna get ahead of the story, alright?
Let's call a press conference.
- Well it seems like a great
place to raise grandchildren.
- [Rainy] And we have
a pretty tight budget
with tax revenues down.
- I'll most likely take any offer.
- It's a very small force-
- Is this the lady we're hiring?
- Gladys, the offer go out?
I called her. She accepted.
- Hot damn. We gotta be all
politically correct now?
Are we hiring a wetback too?
- Cut the racial slurs, Chapman.
I'd like you to work tonight.
(upbeat music)
Stay still
(tire squealing)
- [Driver] Shit!
- [Passenger] Watch the fucking road.
- Check it out.
And I'm gonna promise you
That you won't feel a thing
It's all in your head
At least that's what she said
Stay still she said
- Hey Tommy.
- Hey Charles.
- Been drinking?
- Couple of beers.
- Sheriff asked for me to pull you over.
You know why?
- I ain't seen her in hell, 15 years.
I took her to the prom.
- You took her to prom?
- Senior year.
She was a freshman.
- You popped that cherry.
- Nah, nothing like that.
- You got something. I know you did.
- Nothing. I didn't even kiss her.
- No kiss?
- No kiss.
- Maybe that's why she's
got a hard on for you then.
Well, I'm just gonna write you up a ticket
for having no seatbelt so she
knows I've been doing my job.
- You could.
But then you'd miss that car
with the bad tail light.
(upbeat music)
(Larry and passenger laugh)
It's so damn easy for you to say
- Oh fuck.
Cop Larry, cop!
(siren wails)
Boss can you hold it on too tight
- [Chapman] License and registration.
- Yes sir.
- [Passenger] Larry, the trunk.
Larry, stay in the car.
- Shut up.
- [Passenger] Don't open the trunk.
Dumb ass.
- Did I tell you to get out the vehicle?
- Officer, I just wanted to tell you.
I, I know that I have a tail light out.
You've been knowingly
operating an unsafe vehicle?
- I was just trying to help.
- You want to help?
Open up that trunk then.
(dramatic music)
- [Passenger] Don't open the fucking,
he's opening the fucking trunk.
- You kids stealing hubcaps?
- No, sir.
We're (chuckles) collecting them.
It's a football thing.
You know the story about the kill-
- I know the story.
- You let him take the beer?
- Shut the fuck up.
He didn't take your weed!
(upbeat music)
- Do you believe Jesus is God?
- Yeah.
- Well, he wasn't.
Not before the Council of Nicea.
We should lose our virginity together.
- You don't believe God.
- I don't believe in the flying hubcaps.
- I saw the hubcap.
- I've got protection.
- So do I.
Just how to be free
(engine rumbling drowns out lyrics)
- [Driver] What's up, fuckers?
- Where's the beer, Croff?
- Cops lifted two cases, but
they didn't get Croff's weed.
- [Croff] Fucking cops suck.
- Croff, go get your weed.
- People will smoke it all.
- Don't be a bitch, Crawford.
(party goers exclaim)
- How about a little sugar?
- How about a little weed?
- Feel this?
- You're not exactly my type.
- So, I'm not your type.
But you'll smoke my weed?
- That's exactly right.
- [Croff] I know what you want.
- Whoa. Fuck you!
Keep your fucking pot!
- Stop.
- [Girl] Fuck you. Get off me.
- [Croff] Don't be a bitch.
- Fucking cock sucker!
- Teasing ass bitch!
(unsettling music)
(metal clangs)
(Crawford yells out)
- [Party Girl] You seriously
need to go to the hospital.
- [Party Girl] You need
to get it looked at.
- Your nose is fucked!
- It was the hubcap.
(party goers mocking Crawford)
- Have a toke, dude.
- [Woman] It's Lieutenant
Dan's spirit seeking revenge.
- Really?
(unsettling music)
(hubcap clattering)
- This is Bev Tyler.
- Hey.
- We just had
a homicide, detective.
- I heard.
Killer hubcap on the loose,
searching for vengeance,
attacks local football
hero then kills a man!
Ugh, community in terror.
- How'd you get that story?
- (chuckles) I have my sources.
(phone rings)
- Reminder, rodeo's tonight.
- Rodeo?
- Yeah.
Entertainment's pretty
limited in Gibson County.
- Well, it sounds like fun to me.
- Found out why sheriff's got
a hard on for Tommy Douglas.
- Yeah?
- He popped her cherry.
- Right.
-He took her to prom. She was a freshman.
- I bet.
- This is the hospital.
They've got a boy down there
that's been attacked by a hubcap.
(metal banging)
(metal bangs)
- He hit his face on the trunk latch
and that could account for all the damage.
- But the hubcap attacked
him and caused him to fall?
- Right? Yeah, that's the story.
But just like our quarterback,
he's starting to back off a bit.
(playful music)
- So, tell me what happened.
Little alcohol involved?
- Not much.
Your deputy took all of our beer.
- Who took your beer?
- Chapman.
- Can we see Mike?
- We call him Crawford, Croff.
- He's a little out of it.
We just gave him a sedative.
- Alright, I'd like to
hear a little bit more
about the beer that was taken.
- It was the hubcap, wasn't it?
- It was, it was the hubcap.
(upbeat music)
Well I woke up this
morning, whatdya think I saw
Saw my baby, she's walking
out of my back door
Say come back in here baby,
tell me where have you been
Said I been around messing
around with all your friends
So I packed my bag and I
walked on down the road
Turn around, I ain't
turnin' 'round no more
Down the road, ain't comin' back again
- [Announcer] Gentlemen here tonight,
I've got a question for you.
Are you proud of your hometown heroes?
Are you proud of the men and women
that serve this great country?
(upbeat music)
Oh, it is time.
- Just enjoy yourself.
- [Announcer] Saturday Night live
as we get ready to kick things off.
If that bronc runs around here.
Uh oh. It's all right.
It's all right.
That's just what a horse looks
like when he is laying down.
- What time does the bull riding start?
- Um, it's what, about 30 minutes.
- [Announcer] The winningest
cowboy this season
(upbeat muffled music)
- [Clown] We're back home in Georgia.
Home of the Bulldogs
- I gotta go pee pee.
- Say, we have to use the restroom.
- Okay.
- I'll take him.
- We're close enough, Jeff,
[Clown] I feel the need to ask
if we have any techies.
Any tech fans in the house?
(crowd cheering)
(laughs) Thumbs up.
Hey dude, I'm gonna tell you what, dude,
I'm gonna tell you
something about the parade.
- Same shirt.
Sam's Western Wear?
- Walmart, $8. (laughs)
(bluesy country music)
So I packed my things and
I'm go on down the road
Keep on walkin' and I
ain't turnin' 'round no more
See you later, never come again
(music slows)
(upbeat music)
Drink all night and raise some hell
Pick up all the women in town
And I been around the block
- You wanna join Monica
and me at church on Sunday?
- [Rainy] What's the sermon?
- The sermon is you can't get reelected
by being both a Democrat
and not attending church.
I'm gonna rope you like this
See those cowboys?
They're checking you out over there.
- [Poole] Well here's my dance partner.
Get your zipper off the tracks
Come on and give me a kiss
- Cheers.
I'll even take off my hat
Girl, I can't wait to
cross your welcome mat
Show me how you rope
Now, saddle on up to your partner
Hip to hip
Step left, step right
Gimme a spin
Dip right, now dip right
Gimme three hand claps
(dancers clapping)
There you go
'Cause we can take it fast
or we can take it slow
Girl, when it comes to these hands
I know where they go
- Old boyfriend?
- Right...
I'm gonna rope you like that
I'm gonna pull you real
close and do a two-step
Get your zipper off the tracks
Come on and give me a kiss
(woman gasps)
- What was that?
- I'll even take off my hat
- Go check...
Cross your welcome mat
Girl I can't wait to
cross your welcome mat
- You are so sexy.
She swore she'd never kiss him
- Hey, you two-step?
But he just wasn't her type
But her heart was achin'
And he felt just right
She'd have been forsaken
By the cheatin' kind
The kind she be forgettin'
With him by her side
And blue eyes never lie
Beneath the moonlit sky
So tonight he's gonna be by her side
- Cowboys are just
testosterone buckets in chaps.
- Like that's a bad thing?
- This was fun. Thanks for inviting me.
- So good to see you.
- You too.
- I didn't say you could do that yet.
- Hey, hey, hey.
Don't be in such a hurry.
- Thanks for the dance.
- Whoa, you're a hot number.
- You have my arm.
And you got some guns too, little woman.
- Take your hand off my arm.
- Hey, I just, I just wanna talk.
- If you don't take your hand
off my arm in three seconds,
I will arrest you.
Three, two.
(upbeat music)
(both panting)
- Are you gonna disappoint me?
- Probably.
(woman chuckles)
- [Gladys] I created
you a log-on in Windows.
- I have to share a computer?
- Yeah, with the deputies.
Unless you wanna buy your own.
Sheriff will be in soon.
You want some cake?
- She's been making that
cake for over 20 years.
- Let me guess, she lives
at the top of a mountain.
- Yep.
- (laughs) What a power play.
Everyone has to climb the mountain
and bow before the county queen.
- She's not all bad.
(gentle music)
- Wow.
- [Rainy] Beverly, this is Jacky James,
Chairman of the County Commission.
Beverly, I am so pleased to meet you.
- I'm just Bev, please.
- Oh, ditto here.
- I'm just JJ.
Especially if I'm being
talked about behind my back.
- Well, I will try to remember that
when talking behind your back, JJ.
- (laughs) I like this lady.
We're expecting big things out of you.
- Your hair is absolutely exquisite.
- Why thank you.
- You know, there's a law here
against black people
living above 3000 feet.
- [Bev] Enjoy the view while you can.
- Sheriff Lawson, Gibson County
is the smallest county in Georgia.
- Oh no.
Actually we are the second smallest.
There's a smaller one
down in South Georgia.
And by the time the next
census rolls around,
I believe we will not even
be in the bottom five.
We just continue to grow
as more people find out
what a beautiful secret we have
up here in the North Georgia Mountains.
- Hmm.
Sheriff Lawson, would you address
the reports of a killer hubcap?
- Yeah. I can't comment on that right now.
It's actually an ongoing investigation.
- I understand that someone.
actually picked up the story on Tumblr
and made a cartoon about it.
- Did you see it?
- I did.
It was pretty funny.
- Over 4 million views.
- {Chapman] That's bullshit.
- Well, it's understandable
that some people like to make fun
of us mountain folk.
- [Poole] I wanted to see that.
- Black people on display.
- Say what?
- Me and the DEA agent,
just Black folks on display
standing there shifting and smiling.
- Don't complain.
It's the reason you have a job.
- Really?
So my 20 years in homicide
didn't get me the job?
- I shouldn't say anything.
- But you did. So go on.
- Can we do this later?
- Sure. You're the boss.
- I thought you were very
poised, very professional.
- Yeah, well Bev thinks
I should've worn my gun.
- Yeah. But you didn't ask me.
- What is it, Chapman?
- Nothing.
- I'm asking your opinion.
- Damn Rainy, she made you her bitch.
- Hey, hey, hey, hey.
- Can't let her steal
the spotlight like that.
- [Poole] It's just not necessary.
- You gotta stand up for yourself.
- That's harsh. She's just.
- No, Chapman's right.
JJ's a slick talker.
- [Bev] Mm-hmm.
- Hey, I want those two cases
of beer turned into impound.
Yeah, don't look at me
like you don't know
what I'm talking about.
(Poole chuckles)
- Gibson is the only county in my district
with zero cooperative drug busts.
- Gibson County is poised to make history.
Whether it's Jackey James,
current Chairperson of
the County Commission,
or the daughter of
deceased Sheriff Lawson.
Gibson County will have
Georgia's first female sheriff.
- Your daddy ticketed my
agent for crossing the gore.
- Well we do like folks to drive safe.
While it's true, I haven't
held elected office,
I have entered buildings with
bad guys intending to kill me.
Some folks may find that a
more important qualification.
- You're only 30 years old.
Any desire to start a family?
- Right now I'm trying to win an election
and I'm seeking support
from my constituents
especially those Gibson County cowboys.
- Rainy Lawson, waiting
for the right cowboy
to come along.
(Bev chuckles)
- I look forward to
working with you, Sheriff.
- You like chocolate cake?
- No ma'am.
- Poole said you had a date
with a cowboy on Saturday.
- Poole, remind me to discuss
the importance of discretion
at your next work review.
- I never know what to say.
- So, um, this thing with Tommy Douglas.
You know Chapman played
ball with him, right?
- So?
- Maybe I should just forget about it.
- What did Chapman say?
- Tommy claims to have taken
your virginity in high school.
- Well, that's not true.
- I didn't think so.
- So Tommy Douglas said that?
- Agent Morris?
Say I do have something,
how fast does your team move?
- I can move in 24 hours.
- Can we make it tomorrow morning?
- You know, you know what?
It is none of your damn business
who I might go to the rodeo
with in the first place.
We're not together.
No, no I...
Oh... no I did not fuck him.
Don't you. You better not.
You don't, don't. Fuck you!
You're the bitch.
(upbeat music)
You know what?
You come right on by.
I got a gun too, bitch.
(gun discharges)
(suspenseful music)
- Put that out.
- Yeah, well I don't like
the cowboy crap either.
But you got a role to play.
- Yeah, well this is so unnecessary.
- Don't gimme that Mayberry bull.
Just do what the man do.
- Hold on.
- [Rainy] Tommy Douglas?
- Sheriff.
- [Rainy] You probably don't remember me.
- Watermelon hair.
I remember that smell.
I voted for ya.
- Well, I appreciate that.
Can you come down the steps for a second?
So what do you know about that
shed back behind your house.
- What shed?
- You go back in the woods a ways.
There's an old shed.
- Nah, that ain't on my property.
My property ends right at the fence.
- Glad to hear it.
So who does own that property?
- That'll be Dan Pendley.
You gotta go way around three mile road.
- He says his property ends at the fence.
- [Bev] The plot says
it goes back 300 feet.
- Deputy says your property
goes back there a ways.
- (scoffs) Does it?
Hey Christine!
We own some of the woods back there!
- We have a warrant.
What will we find, Tommy?
(pensive music)
You have the right to remain silent.
You know your rights.
(buckets and hubcap clattering)
(gunfire pops)
(Rainy moans)
-Cease Fire! Cease Fire!
- [Officer] Get off it. Get the fuck back.
- It's okay. It's okay.
It's okay.
- In the books it's a felony.
You got your second for
possession with intent to sell.
- I had no idea what was in that car.
- Georgia's three strikes
and you're out state.
You're facing 25 years,
minimum 80% served.
You'll be 55 before you see daylight.
Your little girl'll be grown and married.
- I don't have anything.
Okay, listen, listen.
What was in that shed?
- Pot, mushrooms.
- Look, my little girl, she has seizures.
What if someone was uh,
someone was trying to help her?
Misdemeanor maybe?
- You gotta gimme something.
(Tommy sighs)
- Alright, you know that
woman across the street
said her husband was murdered by a hubcap?
- You know the killer?
- I seen the hubcap.
In the woods.
I think it's still hanging around in there.
- When you get your AARP card in prison.
Remember I tried to help.
- Okay.
well you have a broken rib
and that's gonna need some stitches.
But you'll be okay.
That a military wound?
- Iraq.
- I have a colleague in Atlanta
does wonders with reconstructive surgery.
- On a sheriff's salary, I'll
be living with the scars.
- Mind if I take a picture
of it, send it to her?
She owes me a favor.
- Knock yourself out.
- Thanks.
- My daughter fell for that trick
and her boobs are all over the internet.
- He's a doctor.
- Right. He played with
'em for five minutes.
- Okay, have you ever had a breast exam?
- Asking you all about the hubcap attacks?
(laughs) I know when a man
has got it for a woman.
- Are you cynical about everything?
- I am a realist.
I mean, for a white
girl, you're very pretty.
- For a white girl?
Well, the most beautiful
women are women of color.
- Bullshit.
Jennifer Lawrence.
- Please.
Halle Berry.
- (scoffs) Taylor Swift.
- Beyonce.
- Okay, now you sound like Kanye.
Um, Sophia Loren.
- Bingo. Make my point for me.
Women of color.
- But she's white.
No, you're white. She's Italian.
The Moors invaded Italy.
Any Black genes in the
pool, woman of color.
I didn't make the rules. (laughs)
- That's ridiculous.
20 years for pot?
It's his third strike?
Yeah, it's just my rib,
Poole, I'll be fine.
- Sheriff Lawson wrecked,
what happened to the car?
- It's at the body shop.
You know Sheriff was lucky.
Not like her daddy.
- Rainy wrecked her car?
- Mm-hmm.
- I was talking about two years ago,
the other Sheriff Lawson.
- Oh, he wrecked a truck.
- Well, what happened to the truck?
- [Gladys] You wanna see the report?
- That'd be great.
(upbeat music)
(woman moans)
(hubcap clattering)
- Oh, I'm close.
(woman moans)
- What the fuck?
- What?
- You have a hole
in your roof.
- Just keep going.
Just keep going.
(women vocalizing)
(both exclaiming)
- We're going to my place.
Get your stuff.
- Shit.
(slow guitar twanging)
(glass cracks)
Mother fucker!
Are you?
Fuck me. Fuck me.
When we were young and beautiful
Left our troubles far behind
- When I get shot, I
usually take a week off.
Just so you know.
Speaking of shots, was
your daddy a big drinker?
- My dad?
- I was just wondering what
made him run off the road.
- Look, Bev, let's get one thing clear.
You work for me, not JJ.
If JJ wants you to
look into Daddy's drinking-
- No, no, no. It's not like that.
- Do you know why you're here?
- Because you can't drive!
- I can drive.
Come on. I can drive.
- Why am I here?
- Forget it.
- I, I wanna understand. Why was I hired?
- There has never been a
Black cop in Gibson County.
Not ever.
- So you're saying I'm a token?
- No, I'm saying you're here
to make it easier for JJ
to defeat me if I don't do what
she wants and toe the line.
Because then I'm the sheriff
that hired a Black cop.
- Seriously.
- This is the whitest county in Georgia.
Just FYI.
- By the way, that red
sporty car, it's a pony car.
I showed her several pictures
and she's pretty sure it's a Mustang.
- That's good work, detective.
- It's what I do.
- If you didn't witness the crime,
it'll be hard to arrest him.
My suggestion is that you
get a restraining order.
Then if you ever see him on the
property, we can arrest him.
- Okay.
- Now you have to do that at the station.
I can take you.
(playful music)
It's a, a part of the training.
Random search for compliance.
Yeah, it's a Homeland Security regulation.
- Okay.
- But in 20 years,
not one wife has been convicted
of murdering her husband.
- Well we have a county
full of loving wives.
- Perhaps, but statistically
probably two or three got away with it.
- Are you planning on
opening cold case files?
- Oh I love cold case work.
Like your daddy's case.
You never told me that Ms. Jackey James
was running for sheriff against him.
- So?
- Well, what are the odds that
a sheriff running for office
gets killed right under
his opponent's house?
- It was ruled in accident.
- By who?
- The coroner, the DA.
- [Bev] Friends of Ms. James.
- JJ's not gonna kill
anyone to get elected.
- And you know this how?
- I always wondered about that myself.
- Exactly!
(door squeaks open)
- Got a lady here seeking
a retraining order.
- Alright, have a seat.
It'll just take a few minutes.
- You're the rodeo girl.
- Are you a police officer?
- Little lady, you're
looking at the sheriff
of Gibson County.
- And that's his mom's address.
But that's where he's at.
- That's close.
I'll run by and serve him
so you can sleep tonight.
- You don't look old enough to be sheriff.
- I'm older than I look.
I actually did eight years in the Army.
- So you're like what, 28?
- 32.
- I'm 23.
My daddy taught me how to shoot.
Maybe I could join the Army.
You married?
- Nope.
- Boyfriend?
- It's been a while since I've
had a uh, romantic partner.
- Yeah, I bet I had
more partners than you.
Oh fathers let's go down
Let's go down
Don't you wanna go down
- This one.
Oh fathers let's go down
Down in the river to pray
As I went down in the river to pray
Studying about that good old way
And who shall wear the robe and crown
Good Lord, show me the way
Oh mothers, let's go down
Let's go down, don't you wanna go down
Oh mothers, let's go down
Down in the river to pray
Down in the river to pray
Down in the river to pray
- [Rainy] Gladys?
- [Earl] This is Earl, Sheriff.
Gladys stepped out.
- Okay, I think I found the car.
766 Old Possum Trail.
I'm gonna need backup.
- [Earl] Roger.
(rock music)
Stay still
(body thuds)
This won't hurt a bit
And I'm gonna promise you
(punch thuds)
That you won't feel a thing
(man yells)
It's all in your head
At least that's what she said
Stay still she said
This won't hurt a bit
- The hubcap.
It's the, the hubcap killed him.
- Okay.
- We gotta call it in.
- Well we could do that.
Or maybe I just got here
and you were never here.
Chapman's on his way.
(thoughtful music)
Are you waiting
For someone new
'Cause I can't go on
Me without you
So now I'm pacing
In this square room
My soul is screaming
Hands reaching for you
- Don't die on me, Corporal.
- I'm sorry, Lawson.
(war sounds)
(Rainy sobs)
Do I have the will to feel again
Pulling all the strength before I can
When I go from start to finish
Forever just became a minute
And it changes me
- [Sergeant] Lawson, get up.
Let's go, Lawson, you're not hurt.
Lawson, let's go.
It takes control, and these
thoughts take a hold of me
A hold of me, a hold of me
- Hey uh, yeah Chapman told me.
So I wanted to come by and see
if you still had the hubcap.
Hey there, glad to meet you.
One wag, if you can hear me.
Two wags if not.
- The spirit's moved on.
- But do, do hubcaps sleep?
Well, you wanna sleep a while?
Alright, let's see, I got this.
Makes it comfortable here.
Hey, can I use the towel?
- Yeah.
- Okay.
See you deserve a really nice rest.
Okay, so here we go.
This makes him comfortable.
- Are you keeping it prisoner?
- Not me, it's your hubcap.
What else are we gonna do with it?
- [Chapman] Hey boss, you look rough.
- I didn't sleep well.
- [Chapman] A bullet in
the back'll do that to you.
- You know about this homicide?
- My case.
Bev's trying to steal it.
- I thought you preferred
the cold case files.
- Cold, hot, warm. I like it. (chuckles)
- Found it on the victim's car.
One hubcap was already missing.
- Well, Dr. Adams'll be by after
work to examine the hubcap.
- Why?
- To determine
if the wound is consistent
with the weapon.
Perfect opportunity for
that handsome Dr. Adams
to suggest drinks, dinner, whatever.
- Dinner?
- Yeah.
- She's schemy, boss.
- Okay, well let's plan on Chapman
handling this investigation.
But I'm interested in
your ideas from yesterday
regarding Daddy.
- You want me to look into that?
- Yeah, see what you can dig up.
(door opens)
- [Bev] Junior Shavers?
- Morning ladies.
Under oath I would have
to admit the truth.
- You don't have to admit to nothing.
- My suggestion is to plead this down
so it doesn't go to trial.
- Seriously, you're just
gonna let Tommy Douglas walk?
- It was an illegal search.
- JJ isn't gonna like this.
- What are you doing here?
- I was talking to Junior Shavers.
Towed your daddy's car.
Guess what?
He didn't bring it to the police impound
'til to the next day.
You know why?
- Because his wife had dinner ready?
- Yeah, well that's what he said.
Did you know he was JJ's nephew?
- Well, everyone with county
contracts is related.
I'm going home.
- Oh, no, no, no, no.
You have to go to the police station.
Dr. Dreamy's coming by at
5:30 to look at the hubcap.
- Yes.
I mean these sharp tabs here
could account for the lacerations.
My God.
I think you found it.
(doctor exclaims)
(both laugh)
- Yeah, my new deputy's
a little over ambitious.
Actually, well she thought that the hubcap
would be an excuse for you to come down
and ask me out on a date.
(doctor laughs)
- I'm just fucking with ya.
I think that's a terrific idea.
I'm starved.
Come to dinner with me.
- I can't.
- Seven o'clock. I'll pick you up.
- Eight o'clock we'll meet.
- Okay.
- Don't you need a warrant?
- No ma'am.
Public records.
Please don't make me reference the fact
that I'm working on a
homicide investigation.
- So what if she's looking
through a few invoices?
- They're from two years ago.
- Montel, is your mama home?
(unsettling music)
- Mom wants you to come for dinner.
- Thanks for the invite, but I...
- Well, I find it admirable
that you don't drink.
Really, this is just my
excuse to pick your brain
about the murder rash in the county.
(laughs) Yes, that that
is one of my vices too.
- Okay, see you soon.
All right.
- She's a hard woman to say no to.
- Yeah.
(jazzy music)
- To Rainy Lawson, the most
beautiful sheriff in Georgia.
- The only female sheriff in Georgia.
(doctor laughs)
- Rainy. How'd you get that name?
- It's funny.
My mom was in labor for two days straight
and it rained the entire time.
So my dad put Rainy on
the birth certificate.
I was actually supposed
to be an Elizabeth.
- I'm glad you're a Rainy.
My ex is an Elizabeth.
- How many exes are there?
- Just the one.
- Never been married.
- Well, I hope you're
not counting calories.
- Oh, I only count my paycheck.
(JJ laughs)
- Well, I'm sure you're gonna be
a little disappointed there.
We don't exactly pay Detroit wages.
- Yes, but you have mountains.
- Mmmm, This is true. And waterfalls.
Georgia has some beautiful waterfalls.
- Oh, I look forward to seeing them.
- I look forward to showing them to you.
- Well, it's a five mile hike,
but there's a nice pool
at the base to cool off.
- I'd love to go sometime.
- Well bring your swimsuit.
- I'm wearing my swimsuit.
(both laugh)
- Thanks.
- Lester told me he saw you
at the courthouse today.
- Lester?
- Mm-hmm.
- The district attorney.
Les is someone you should know.
- Everybody just calls her JJ.
- She's on the hospital board.
- She's on the board of everything.
- You two aren't friends?
- Well, she ran against me.
I won.
(jazzy music)
- What's wrong?
- You're really beautiful.
This was your deputy's idea, dinner?
You should give her a raise.
- Raises have been approved.
Honestly, we've been
underfunded for years.
So it's high time we
pay competitive wages.
So what caught your interest
at the courthouse?
- I was checking invoices.
- Looking into the recent murders?
- More like a cold case thing.
- Really?
- Sheriff has me checking some old things.
You know her daddy died right
at the base of this mountain.
- It's a day I'll never forget.
- Well, my team was in Fallujah
and we separated the men
from the women and children
and then shit happened and
I was facing a grenade.
My corporal shielded me.
But uh, he didn't make it.
- Your corporal?
- My boyfriend.
Fraternizing with
enlisted was a big no-no.
But he won me over with shadow puppets.
Can you do shadow puppets?
(Rainy laughs)
- That's really all I got.
- Adversity is opportunity.
Never forget that.
- Adversity is opportunity?
- What are you really doing here, Bev?
Checking two year old invoices?
- How many drinks did Sheriff
Lawson have that night?
- I mean his blood alcohol was .07.
- It was a Sunday. He may...
Montel, do you remember?
- There was a football game
on and it was his day off.
So he probably had four or five.
- He's a grown man.
- Wanted to have children
and we waited too long.
- So no affairs, no scandal?
- No, in fact, we're still friends.
She's my reconstructive colleague.
- If you're implying
that I intentionally got my opponent drunk
to win an election, you
have seriously misjudged my --
- I didn't say that.
- I would never endanger
someone to win an election.
- I'd really like to kiss you.
- Well then you should've sat next to me.
- Just sitting more strategically.
(Rainy laughs)
(happy music)
- Can I get you more Mer-LOT?
- Um, I believe we're having the Caber-NET.
- It's Caber-NAY.
- Right.
(both laugh)
- He kept the truck overnight,
so I checked invoices.
He charged the county
for towing the truck.
- That is the business he's in.
- Yeah, but he also charged the county
for replacing brake fluid,
service date the next day.
- Okay, so I drained the brake fluid.
Sheriff crashed.
And then I had my nephew
replace the brake fluid?
- It's a theory.
- But he's so stupid, he
invoiced the county for the job?
- (laughs) Apparently.
- (laughs) Oh my goodness.
You have a fun job, detective.
Did Rainy put you up to this?
- Actually it was my idea.
It's just too big of a coincidence
that your opponent dies
right before the election
at the base of your driveway.
- But there is no invoice
for replacing brake fluid.
- Nice one, detective.
- It's in my car.
You wanna see it?
- Why yes.
I would very much like to see it.
- I'll be right back.
- So I referred your case to my ex
and she actually sent a picture
of what you will look like
after reconstructive surgery.
- Really?
- Mm-hmm.
- (laughs) Oh my gosh.
Birth, birthday present.
- Deputy Tyler?
Honey, I get scared and lonely
And I need someone
- Don't ever misjudge
what a mother will do
to protect her child.
- [Montel] Dang.
And I need someone to hold me
- Let's open the trunk.
- When you shoot someone
for the first time,
you don't forget it.
- Treated my share of GSWs at Grady.
Can't exactly say I'm pro-gun.
- Killing changes you.
- I believe it.
Just take my hand
We'll find our way through
We won't be afraid
- Your cousin's a fucking idiot.
Invoicing for stupid brake fluid
- [Montel] Here it is.
- This is a towing invoice.
- There's nothing else in here.
And I need someone to hold me
- I'd like to see you again.
- I'd like to see you again.
Someone like you
I get scared and lonely
And I need someone to hold me
Just like you do
- [Montel] I'm sorry.
I thought he would just get a DUI.
- Come here, come here, come here.
We all make mistakes.
Everyone thinks I'm stronger
Much stronger than I am
I get scared and lonely and
I need someone to hold me
I get scared and lonely and
I need someone to hold me
Just like you do
Just take my hand
We'll find our way through
We won't be afraid
'Cause we got each other
To hold onto
- Do you ever wanna have babies?
Honey I get scared and lonely
And I need someone to hold me
I get scared and lonely and
I need someone to hold me
Someone like you
I get scared and lonely
And I need someone to hold me
Just like you do
(phone vibrates)
- What's up?
Honey, can you watch Misty?
- It's your day off, isn't it?
- Do you have a game?
- No. It's just practice. (chuckles)
Come here baby.
You wanna see Daddy hit a home run?
You wanna see Daddy hit a home run?
Yeah, let's go watch Daddy hit a home run.
- [Man On Radio] We're honored
to have Miss Jackey James
with us today to lead us in prayer.
- [Interviewer] 235 yards with three TDs.
Coach Small, you have to be pretty proud.
- [Coach] Well, yes.
That's pretty good game.
- [Interviewer] Red shirt
freshman Jake Kinnard
coming in for the injured quarterback,
leads the Vols to a
close win over Kentucky.
We sure could use Jake back
on the team this year, Coach.
- [Coach] You get a player like
Jake just once in a career.
- [Interviewer] Well, the
Cowboys have a tough game
coming up.
Who is it coming up, Coach?
- Habersham County.
- Habersham County!
I hope y'all come out Friday night.
- It's Bev's car.
My guess is to the bones in the trunk.
Now it's really bad, so prepare yourself.
Found this wedged between her teeth.
- Your deputy removed
it from the crime scene
(thoughtful music)
- [Doctor] So much for
our Sunday together.
- I should only be gone
for an hour or two.
- Hmm. An hour or two?
- I, I think I can probably
wait an hour or two.
Maybe not.
(Rainy laughs)
(soft music)
(in French)
- Well, I would wish you
well in the election, Rainy,
but I don't wanna be disingenuous.
My polling has me up by 20 points.
- I should've ran as a Republican.
If your pride can stand it,
I would love for you
to stay on as a deputy.
- I don't think that will be an option.
We pulled a car outta
the lake this morning.
It appears to Bev Tyler's,
with the remains in the trunk.
- How horrid!
Well, it's nice that
that little mystery's getting cleared up.
- We found this wedged
between two back teeth.
- Please. Nothing from the crime scene.
Ugh. Maybe I am too
squeamish to be sheriff.
The reigning theory is that
she put it there herself
as a clue.
- Where are you going with this, Rainy?
- I'm just interested in any thinking
you might have on the subject.
- Well, when I'm elected sheriff,
I assure you all unsolved murders
will be high on my agenda.
- Look, it's shaped like a J.
- (laughs) Okay, I get it.
So I killed your detective
to make you look bad
so that I could win the election.
Is that it?
Call a press conference.
- Yeah, joke if you want,
but that's sort of what I'm thinking.
- Good luck, Sheriff.
Bring a charge against me two
weeks prior to the election
and I will bury you in the press.
- I'm thinking Bev found
some incriminating evidence
in my father's death
and made the mistake of
confronting you with it.
- Is that why you're wearing a gun, Rainy?
To arrest me, bring me
down to the station?
Call it a precaution.
- Montel, the sheriff has to leave.
Will you please walk her to her car?
- I may be returning with a
warrant to check your weapons.
(twangy country music)
- My late husband had over 50 firearms.
We've gotten rid of what,
half since he passed?
I'm sure whatever bullet you find,
he likely had a gun of the same caliber.
- [Rainy] I can find the car myself.
- Come back anytime.
I met you long ago
When we were young and didn't know
Left our troubles far behind
Time when only I was sure
We won't be 'round you anymore
I saw you with him all the time
(tires squealing)
(gentle music)
- Hey babe, she's down.
What was that favor you wanted me to do?
- There's a box in the attic.
(rock music)
- Maybe it's an Hispanic hubcap.
You could try speaking Spanish to it.
Donde esta la casa de Pepe.
- The spirit could have moved on.
- Come to bed.
I'll speak Spanish to ya.
(both chuckle)
- You know it could just be asleep
or maybe it just needs the sun to charge.
- What are we gonna name the baby?
We got Misty and Rainy.
I'm really kind of feeling Sunny.
- It's a boy.
- Thought we weren't peeking.
- Just a feeling.
- Mmm.
Buenas noches, El Hubcapo!
Come on.
I had a woman come into the ER yesterday.
Alien tractor beam
dislocated her shoulder.
She wanted to be reassured
that the alien probing
hadn't damaged her internal organs.
She'll be okay.
Text me if it comes to life.
You're welcome for the hair, by the way.
I'm off to work.
- Wow. Nice job.
(unsettling music)
(hubcap clanging)
- Do you know how fast you were going?
- Nuh uh.
- I'm gonna have to ticket you now.
- [Poole] I don't know why
she's behind in the poll's.
- She never found the killer.
- Maybe she did.
- But she didn't tell no one?
- Hubcap. Who's she gonna tell?
- Right...
- We need your vote. Lawson-Adams.
- Okay.
- What are we gonna do with the deputies?
- Hmm. Chapman and the retard are fine.
Poole is the one loyal to Rainy.
- He's gotta go.
- Mm-hmm.
(doorbell rings)
(unsettling music)
(JJ screams)
(upbeat music)
Way down in Gibson County
Way down, North Georgia way
Rainy Lawson is the sheriff
And hubcap rolls or so they say
Hubcap loves Rainy, hurt her
and there'll be hell to pay
Born after two days of rain
It only makes sense that
that should be her name
Spilled her blood on foreign soil
Some things you don't forget and leave in war
She got a purple heart 'cause
some of that blood
She spilled was her own
She went on home
She became the sheriff
And walked a while
in her daddy's shoes
Tough as nails, big warm heart
She was loved by all she knew
She put service first, ooooh,
Oh, how about you
Rainy wore her service scars
They say time heals all wounds
She found love and will bring new life
To Gibson County soon