I Am a Camera (1955) Movie Script

[slow waltz plays]
My name is Christopher Isherwood.
I'd like to think that I need say no more,
but perhaps I'd better add,
I am a novelist,
comfortably off, set in my ways,
a confirmed bachelor.
Sentimental melodies have
a profound and moving effect on me.
[plays classical piece
on badly tune piano]
They seem to go to my stomach.
They make me feel that maybe
I have missed something in life.
Unfortunately, I can't always miss
the literary cocktail parties
to which I'm invited by my publisher.
They always stage these things
when they're trying to promote
the more dubious items on their list.
[enthusiastic chatter and laughter]
A gaggle of female journalists
was in evidence,
from which I gathered that
some lady's murky memoirs
was being foisted on the public.
The more worthless the book,
the more they need noise
and alcohol to launch it.
However, it's only civil on such occasions
to know at least the name
of the unfortunate author.
I could hardly believe my eyes.
Sally Bowles?
[woman chuckles]
It's impossible.
What? Do you know her?
I knew her, my boy,
if anyone ever knew her.
It's quite a story.
And you needn't lick your lips.
A story in which nothing happened
and yet everything happened...
to me even more than to her.
I was struggling with my first book
and losing every round.
I was broke.
My only asset was
a knowledge of German.
So I went to Berlin.
It was 1931.
New Year's Eve, in fact.
Money was short.
The book was getting nowhere.
So I stayed at home
and stared out of the window.
Signs of celebration were few
and far from glamorous.
Berlin in those days
was a dreary, hopeless place.
The Nazis, not yet in power,
were hanging about on street corners
making themselves unpleasant.
[man wolf whistles]
[raucous laughter]
I was a foreigner.
What could I do?
I knew in my heart of hearts
I was ducking the issue.
But I took refuge in
a very convenient phrase.
I said I to myself...
I am a camera.
Good title.
"I Am A Camera".
Herr lssyvoo.
- Oh, hello, Fritz.
- What did you say?
-I said I'm a camera.
A camera?
With its shutter open,
just watching it, quite detached,
taking pictures of it all to be
developed sooner or later and printed.
Now sit down, here in the big chair.
- You will feel better then.
I didn't mean I am a camera.
I meant I'm like one.
Now I understand.
You mean, writing is photographs,ja?
All the same, it would be good if you
would look after yourself a little more
and eat a little more,
not to work so hard all the time.
All day, he lies down to think.
All night, I hear him walking
up and down, up and down.
Now, if he would find himself
a nice young lady,
he wouldn't walk up and down so much.
You and your young ladies.
You go and get Herr Wendel some beer.
All right.
I didn't expect you tonight, you old gigolo.
I thought you were going out
dancing with that...
What's her name? The little widow.
That's the little question.
Well, they say she's got
300,000 marks, yes,
but she also weighs 160 pounds.
[sighs] I fear I shall never marry.
The fortunes get smaller and
the ladies get larger all the time.
It's the inflation.
Ah, perhaps I'm too much an idealist.
I telephoned Gerda tonight.
I was badly ill and cannot dance.
Well, she would not believe me.
Now this I find ultimately insulting.
- So what are you up to now?
-First and foremost, my dear friend,
to take you out tonight.
So you shall not sit and brood
over your verdammtest manuscript.
- But will you come?
Something very interesting,
I promise you.
[swing jazz plays, chattering voices]
[they chatter in German]
Well, my friend?
Yesterday at this party,
I met a young lady.
Now look, if you think
you're going to involve me--
-[in German] Two beers, please.
English, my boy!
So fresh, so innocent.
But underneath one could sense
full of enthusiasm and, er, possibilities.
Her mother, she told me, was French.
Well, you know what that means?
I know what it means,
but she, I think, does not yet know.
[drum roll, cymbal crashes]
[compere in German]
And now, ladies and gentlemen,
our New Year's Eve surprise,
the famous English artist...
- That's her?
...Frulein Sally Bowles!
[she sings to the tune of:
"lch Hab' Noch Einen Koffer in Berlin "]
I saw him in a caf in Berlin
The sort of place
where love affairs begin
The lilac conveyed
The world was young then
A ukulele sounded gaily
From within
I only saw the lamplight on his hair
He only picked his hat up from a chair
A minute later
He paid the waiter
Good, huh?
And when I dared to look again
He wasn't there
The night was dark...
Well, what do you think?
She has talent, huh? Personality?
I don't know.
But I remember thinking him
The finest man I'd seen
Never asked me where or how
For I cannot say
But I know I'll love him now
till my dying day
He left a minute after I came in
A funny way for lovers to begin
I can't forget him
I never met him
I only saw him in a caf in Berlin
Bravo! Bravo!
-[Fritz] Bravo! Bravo!
Bravo, bravo!
Well, it seems to me sooner or later
this lovely young girl will be seized
-by one of these lousy types here.
-So what?
Oh, so I say to myself, if this is going
to happen anyway, why not me?
Ah, naturally, I must marry sooner or later.
A man must live.
But when I dance with Gerda,
I think later.
Ah! But when I see this girl and
she gives me the look of the eyes.
She said something about
going to Paris soon.
Chris, I intend to go there too
and live with her.
What on?
Well, in my idealistic mood,
I don't think of money.
Well, she said something
about a film contract.
Paris, my boy, Paris,
with such a film star!
If you're going to live on what
she makes as a film star,
I think you'd both better
take a sandwich along.
Oh, shut up!
My dear miss.
- Allow my congratulations.
-[she laughs] Thanks.
Oh, yes! At Rudy's yesterday.
I remembered your eyes.
As if they were asking me to look
at you and yet not see you.
Oh, but allow me. This is Mr lsherwood.
He's writing a very famous novel.
- Chris, this is Miss Sally Bowles.
-How do you do?
- How do you do?
-You will join us here, miss?
Oh, thanks. I'd just adore it,
but I'm off to Paris tonight.
By the two something train with Pierre.
- Pierre?
-Yes, he's my fiance'.
He's wonderful. Aren't you, darling?
- So the lousy type got there first.
-Oh, you sneer at everything.
Well, I must be losing myjudgement,
my sixth sense.
Perhaps I had better get
married to Gerda while I can.
She's angry. I was too frank with her.
I didn't listen to Fritz's moans.
His innocent little English girl seemed to be
having trouble with her unpleasant fiance.
I observed it with the correct
camera-like detachment.
But I couldn't help feeling
sorry for her all the same.
- Darling, please.
-Don't argue! Give me the money!
[fianc] Come on!
Do you want to wait forever?
[drum roll, cymbal crashes]
[piglet squeals, oompah music plays]
[party clamour and laughter]
[balloons popping]
[party horns blowing, pig squealing]
Give me the money, I said!
Don't you trust me, is that it?
- No, darling.
-Now listen, you! Do you want trouble?
All right! All right.
Well, all right.
You will come back?
[woman screams]
[man laughs heartily]
[man's laughter continues]
[swing jazz plays]
That's an interesting situation.
To me, no more.
Let's go and talk to her.
If you'll excuse me,
I think I'll go ultimately to Gerda.
For she may be at home, lonely,
worrying about me.
After all, I have got a heart.
[swing jazz plays]
- May I?
-Oh, do.
Oh, at least till Pierre comes back.
He's terribly jealous, you know.
At least I think he is.
Poor little thing, trying so hard
to appear sophisticated.
Naive as a school girl, trustful as a child,
defenseless in the night world of Berlin.
She had changed her clothes for the train.
The hour came and passed.
She bravely tried to pretend the man
would still come back for her.
At last, I had to say it.
He won't come.
I suppose he won't.
Shall I see you home?
Only to the front door.
- Which way?
Just any way.
I mean, I thought I was going to Paris
so I gave up my room.
Well, I suppose I'd better
find you a hotel.
Well, yes, but...
You see, Pierre took all my money.
To turn into a terrific lot of francs
on the black exchange, he said.
The trouble is,
I've almost none left myself.
- Oh.
-Well, there's only one thing for it.
You'd better come home with me.
Well, all right.
There's an empty room at my place.
In fact, I'm moving into it tomorrow,
to save on the rent.
[distant bell tolls]
- There it is.
- Oh, I say...
Avvfully decent of you
to offer to put me up.
You see tonight
when Pierre didn't come back,
I made an absolute vow never, never...
You needn't be afraid of me.
There's no room for
that sort of thing in my life.
You see, I've work to do,
very important work.
Must be.
[she shivers]
I'm sorry, the other room's locked.
The land lady's always locking
everything up all the time.
But you can have the bed over there.
I'll sleep here on the sofa.
Is this your bed?
Perfectly pure.
Well, it is rather like Sir somebody
or other, isn't it?
You know, I rather like this room.
You can take it if you like.
As I said, I'm giving it up.
Well, that'll be fine.
I mean, it is rather mouldy
and sinister, isn't it?
Just right for me if I'm going
to be a sort of a nun.
I'm moving across the passage
so I can keep an eye on you.
You mean, because of men like Pierre?
I admit I do fall for them rather.
Pierre is such a thrill.
When he walked up to me...
When was it?
Was it Wednesday?
Two or three nights ago.
...he looked so divinely sinister.
But you said he was your fiance'.
Well, he was more of a faun really.
Last night, he made me feel as if
I was some marvellous kind of nymph.
Miles away from anywhere
in the middle of the forest.
Then the landlady came in and
made the most boring remarks.
I mean, I may not be absolutely exactly
what some people call a virgin.
That's no reason for her to call me
was she called me, is it?
So what if Pierre did happen to be there?
And anyway, I meant to be
terribly faithful to him.
That pretty well makes him
my fiance', doesn't it?
I suppose it is a point of resemblance.
Well, do we just go to bed
or do we have a drink first?
I've got a pupil in the morning.
I give English lessons.
I think we'd better go to bed.
Well, all right.
You can undress in there,
behind the curtain.
[she laughs]
I bet you're afraid of me.
Of course, I did make a vow.
- Now look here, Sally...
If you're going to live here...
Well, we'll talk about it in the morning.
Goodnight, Chris.
Goodnight, Sally.
[pensive music]
I wondered what on earth
I'd let myself in for.
I thought of my quiet life
and my programme of work.
"Ah, well," I thought,
"I can deal with all this in the morning."
[seductive music]
[Frulein Schneider]
Herr lssyvoo! Herr lssyvoo!
-[he groans]
-Herr lssyvoo!
Past eleven and Frulein Landauer
will be here half past for her lesson.
It's time to wake up, lazy V00!
[both gasp]
But... but... but... but...
Where... Where's Herr lssyvoo?
Here I am Frulein Schneider.
But, Herr lssyvoo,
when I said a young lady...
I've been most divinely chaste!
This much I see.
Now look here, Schneiderchen,
to be "chaste" is to be pure, to be virginal.
Chased? That maybe, Herr lssyvoo,
but when you are caught...
Now, look here, Frulein Schneider,
this is Miss Bowles, a very
respectable, young English lady.
Practically a nun. You see, I made a vow...
- She wanted a room exactly like this one.
- So I brought her here.
-I wouldn't be bad as a lodger.
- I'm awfully quiet.
-Quiet? Yes, not a sound did I hear.
So light, so slim!
Should I be chased, um Gottes wil/en,
the neighbours below,
they would go bang, bang, bang
on the ceiling.
I bet you've been chased
all over the place in your time.
When Frulein Landauer comes here,
lssyvoo, what shall I do?
Good heavens, I'd forgotten!
Sally, get some clothes on
as quickly as you can.
- Is the little room open?
-Already I clean it.
Good, I'll wash in there.
Sally, hurry, please!
The frulein is studying in Berlin
or perhaps a profession?
Well, I was a future film star.
A film star, hmm?
But at present I'm singing in a nightclub.
- At least I was.
Herr lssyvoo told the fraulein
this room with breakfast is 5O mark?
I think it's an absolute dream.
- Sally!
-Come in.
[Sally whistles a tune]
Well, it just slipped a bit.
Not dressed?
But I asked you to get dressed.
- But, darling, I had to do my nails.
-Get that off!
No, no, no, no!
I mean, put something on.
- Well, darling, I can't!
-Get in there. Draw the curtains.
[Fritz] SQ!
Frulein Schneider, she says
you give the English lesson.
"Here is the foot. Here is the knee."
Oh, now, stop all this nonsense
and let Sally get dressed.
My pupil will be here any moment,
a very proper, innocent, young girl.
If you'll turn your back a minute.
I have a pain in my back, dear miss,
with all that goes on behind it.
He's jealous.
He had his eye on you last night.
- Chris!
-Don't worry.
We were just like... like two
little white rabbits or something.
When I was young, dear miss,
I also kept those pets.
Now listen, Fritz, there's nothing
between Sally and me!
Strange but true.
Well, in that case, dear miss...
[doorbell rings]
Here she is now!
My pupil, my only pupil.
Sally, get something on quick!
Fritz, help me, stop her!
Good morning, Frulein Landauer.
Happy New Year!
- Good morning.
-Lovely weather...
- Oh, hello, Chris!
-Good morning, Natalia.
I hope I'm not too late.
Have I kept you waiting?
No, no. No, not a bit.
I come to say, Chris, unfortunately
I cannot have my lesson today.
- Do you mind?
-Oh, not in the very least, I assure you.
Oh, may I present Fritz Wendel?
Miss Natalia Landauer.
How do you do?
But we stand here in the hall?
I have eight minutes.
Chris, I wish you a Happy New Year.
I hope it will be calm and peaceful.
I hope so too.
I mean, I hope you'll continue
to take your lessons.
Oh, but certainly, yes.
Only today there is a great meeting
on the unemployment,
to raise help for the poor people
who have no work.
This winter there are many who
do not have clothes to cover them.
- Yes, I know.
-And I'm one of them!
Oh, one of the unemployed, I mean.
They'll never take me back at the Windermere.
I mean, they got so petty last night
because I told them I was leaving
without giving them years of notice.
[she laughs]
[whispers] I can't find my shoes.
Oh, this is Miss Sally Bowles.
Miss Natalia Landauer.
- How do you do?
-How do you do?
- You have been taking a lesson?
-No, I'm English.
- Oh?
-I just dropped in.
- Dearest miss, your shoe.
-Oh, thank you.
[she chuckles]
Oh, thank you for lunch, Schneider.
Here on the table, please.
- You permit I get you a little coffee?
- How do you take it?
I too, black, like Othello.
Will you have a little roll, dear miss?
[yawning] I'm dying for breakfast.
Natalia, is your father better?
Oh, from his cold, yes. But now
he has much trouble with the store.
The Nazis now start to campaign that all
the department stores are owned by Jews.
- Landauer's!
-It is a very bad thing.
But it is the most
beautiful store in all Berlin!
- Oh, coffee, dear miss?
-Thank you.
- Oh, please, sugar for your coffee.
-No, no, I never take it.
I could make a compliment
that you are sweet enough already,
but that would be old hat.
And scientifically not correct.
You like science? Well, I too!
- Well, even if I did make a vow.
-[Fitz] Unmarried people stay always young.
- Like you.
-Thank you.
Come on, Fritz,
I'll make you a prairie oyster.
It'll do you all the good in the world.
I saw some eggs over here
and Worcester sauce.
[Sally] When you're feeling
paralysed and dead
after a terrific, insane sort of a night,
there's absolutely nothing in the world
so good for you as a prairie oyster.
I simply live on them.
I think that Sally rather likes
to shock people.
Oh, Chris, what an utterly feeble thing to say.
Why do say that I'm out to shock people?
Why do you paint your fingernails green,
for example?
[she laughs]
Well, to attract men.
[she chuckles]
That's why.
You know, to feel their eyes
running up like mice!
What absolutely phoney rubbish.
Oh, no, that is good to attract men.
A girl when she is healthy,
that is what she most wishes, no?
And I will tell you,
if you will not be shocked.
If I were in love with a man,
really in love,
and we could not get married,
I would not hesitate to live with him.
By me, it is good to meet
a young lady who is strong and free
and above these conventions
which are in these days gaga!
- I'll make you an oyster.
- Thank you.
You despise conventions, dear miss?
Well, I too!
[she laughs]
Oh, now look here, Natalia,
I hope you don't think that Sally and l...
Well, yes, Chris, because of this.
- Well, really, Schneider, leaving her...
-Oh, Chris!
[they all laugh, except Chris]
[she gulps]
- I hope we meet again, Miss Bowles.
-I hope.
Now, I must go to
the unemployment meeting.
Dearest miss, may I come with you?
Fritz, darling!
Would you take me to the Windermere?
I left my bag there. I'd better collect it.
Oh, I am most sorry, but this meeting
for the unemployed, it is a duty.
- May I have the pleasure?
-Well, if you're really going, yes.
Goodbye, Chris.
You are interested in social problems,
dear miss? Well, I too!
I must say I think he's
rather a bogus character.
I suppose he is in a way, perhaps because
he rather fancies himself as a gigolo.
But I don't know, there's something
rather sad about Fritz.
He'll be quite a bit sadder if he thinks
he's going to make a hit with that girl.
"I too, dear miss!" Phhh!!
She'll never fall for that.
Well, I'll be off, I think.
Well, I'd better get my things cleared out.
- Bye, Chris.
-Bye-bye, Sally.
Sally certainly seemed to grow on people,
but I was determined she wasn't
going to interfere with my work
and I made up my mind to tell her so
in no uncertain terms.
- Oh, back again?
-Oh, yes.
- I'm just finishing...
- What did they say at the Windermere?
-There was nobody there but the doorman.
[she sings a melody]
[Sally] I say...
you don't absolutely hate me
throwing you out of your room like this?
Poor, mangy old thing.
No, just this.
- Cripes! Is this your hairbrush?
-Oh, I've been meaning to wash it.
- Are you losing your hair?
-I don't know. Do you think so?
- Don't tell me you take all those!
-[coughs] Only when I need them.
What are they? Things to restore
your strength or something?
No, just vitamins and things.
Want some?
No, thanks. I've got rather
too much vitality already.
[she chuckles]
Me in my innocent youth.
Now, where's the other?
My very best pair!
Kurt brought me those
and I've scarcely worn them.
That old pig will never give me
the other one if I left it in my old room.
Glad I took a few towels.
Knew it would serve her right
for something or other.
Half a 60-mark pair!
I hope it hits somebody.
No. It's just lying there
looking rather, you know.
There's a little boy.
He's just pouncing on it.
He's running round the corner with it.
Perhaps he's got a one-legged sister.
Are you really writing a famous novel?
Well, I'm sort of working
on the general idea.
It's hard work, I can tell you.
Which reminds me. Ever since last night
I've been meaning to tell...
I can tell you lots of things to put in it.
You know secrets of a woman's life
and moments of passion!
Yes, I expect you can,
but, look, as I was about to say...
There's my shoe!
-[man] Ow!
-Sally, I'm trying to tell you something.
This time it did hit somebody!
Oh, Chris!
I'm awfully glad
we're going to be friends.
I don't think I ever had
a real friend before.
Oh, one or two girls maybe.
Girls are so effeminate.
Can you cook?
Eggs and things.
Have you ever read Trilby?
It'd be rather like that.
I'll get jobs and become a terrifically
well-known nightclub singer.
Maybe a film star!
And in between, I'll inspire you
and we'll have meals together.
I bet you wear a belt as well as braces.
- Mentally maybe I do.
-I wish I could be a pupil for you.
But I couldn't pay you till I got a job.
And of course, I speak English already.
But I'll darn your socks and things,
and I'll cook for you and wash up
and do the cleaning.
[she sings a melody]
B rrrr!
So Sally was going to be
the little housewife. Hmm!
She spent her time going
the round at the agents.
Whatever she may have got from them,
it certainly wasn't a job.
Pupils were scarcer than ever.
The rent was unpaid and Schneider
no longer cleaned up for us.
As for my famous novel...
the less said about that the better.
Before long I was forced to pay a visit
to my brokers to negotiate a loan.
I was mortified to find that cameras
were not highly rated
in the financial circles of the Hauptstrasse.
I find so!
- Chris!
-Hello, Chris.
- Hello!
-Hello, Fritz. Hello, Natalia.
- Hello!
-How is the work,Chris?
- Oh, not so bad.
-You are writing hard?
It goes well now, hmm? Fine.
As Herr Landauer was saying
to me the other day,
"To work is good."
But meine liebe Fritz,
it was not of Chris he said that.
How is Sally?
She is always out when I come.
Well, she's looking for a job, you know.
We put a note in the door. This week and next,
I can no more take my lessons.
- You see, my father sends us to the mountains.
-And I am invited for the weekend.
Well, at least, I go to stay at the inn.
Well, that'll be all right, of course.
- Goodbye, Chris.
- Bye, Chris!
-Komm fort schne/I! We'll be late.
[Natalia laughs]
[cosy indistinct chatter]
I don't know, other people
seemed to be having fun.
But I reminded myself that it
wasn't my business to have fun.
I had to get back to my
little room and my work.
I began to feel my programme
was a lot of rot.
That everything I'd ever written
was spiritless, cold and dead.
That I never should be a writer.
Hello. Are you asleep?
- No.
-I thought you might be working.
- I just washed my hair.
-You're always washing your hair.
The food's ready, what there is of it.
Agent have anything?
He said maybe next week.
He took me out for a drink afterwards,
that's why I was late.
Somehow or other, he got the impression
that today was my birthday.
- Not with it!
-Yes, with.
Is it the writing?
[he sighs]
You see, I...
I put down what they do,
I put down what they say.
And Lord knows,
they're all terribly unhappy.
But it adds up to nothing.
Why not have someone leave
them a terrific lot of money?
Oh, talk about something you understand.
I most certainly understand
being left a terrific lot of money!
I've thought about it a great deal.
In any book where people are left
a lot of money, well, I think it's fine.
They're not even people.
I read over what I'd done.
They seem to have no faces, nothing.
Well... Well, if you put in, say,
that a girl's got violet eyes
with some sort of beautiful,
sensuous mouth.
- Well, that's a face, isn't it?
- Or if a man's got terrific broad...
-Oh, don't be stupid!
No faces?
Well, bottoms up, I say.
What's the good of trying to explain?
What's the good of trying to write?
What's the good of anything?
Oh, Chris...
It'll get better.
You'll write the book
and it'll be terribly good.
Everybody knows you're a genius.
Yes, I told them so myself.
Oh! [she laughs]
- No!
-Oh, what the...
A Puritan all of a sudden?
If you like.
Just where I'm concerned?
You're the Puritan.
You'd hate me, Chris.
That's why it was ugly.
We'd never be able to
talk to each other again.
I know I talk like a fool very often.
All right, Sally.
I'll go to bed.
It'll get better. After this horrible
winter's over you'll feel different.
Truly you will.
[romantic music swells]
Sally was right. Spring came at last.
And all the starved cats in the neighbourhood,
ourselves included,
began to feel that life was worth living.
The bookshops blossomed with new editions.
Unfortunately, all by other authors.
We were still as hard up as ever,
but we could have drifted along
quite happily,
but for that memorable day which began
with a visit to the Landauers.
Mothballs and old England!
Respectable enough?
If I wear my fox they won't see
I haven't a necklace.
They'll see my fox.
Perhaps if I brushed it
with some hair oil.
Oh, make up your mind,
it's getting late.
Well, I'm ready.
I bet they give us a terrific lunch!
Now all of a sudden, you're glum.
Well, it's not that. It's...
It's just that I may have contracted
a rather fatal disease.
Now, why do you always choose a day
when we are going somewhere?
Now what is it, for heaven's sake?
Locomotor ataxia.
- What?
-Well, it's a form of paralysis.
Look here.
It's pretty final.
Well, let me try.
Well, it's... it's probably just
a bit of housemaid's knee.
Good morning, my humble friends.
- Well, are you ready?
-Well, almost.
Only Chris has got a touch
of locomotor...
- What?
-Locomotor ataxia. Look here.
You? Impossible. Let me.
See? You were hitting too high up.
Oh, you will live, I think.
Now, come along.
I've been out there already.
Natalia's parents have lent me
a car to pick you up.
Do you mean to say
they let you drive their car?
Well, why not?
But this one happens to be the limousine
so ultimately the chauffeur drives.
Well, if we're going to be driven by
a chauffeur, I'm going to wear my hat.
Penniless people should avoid
contact with the rich.
Already poor Fritz
was acting like a son-in-law.
Though we all knew he was
getting nowhere with Natalia.
As for Sally...
it might have been the chauffeur,
it might have been the car,
but something transformed her.
She looked at the Landauer house as if
she had never seen glass or concrete before.
Or flowers, or silver, or servants.
It all went to her head like wine.
So did the wine.
By the afternoon, she was treading on air.
[tango music plays]
{music St o Oh! Ds]
Not bad, considering.
- Do you remember the Charleston?
-Oh, perfectly.
Oh, Fritz, please get the record.
It's on the left, I think.
I just adore those old-fashioned dances.
[she squeals with delight]
[she sings a melody]
If you were rich,
would you buy me a fur coat?
[Charleston plays]
You know, sometimes I think Chris
has no heart at all.
I wish I had none.
[she chuckles]
Poor old Fritz, you have
got it badly, haven't you?
[he sighs]
You know...
it's for money.
Sally, I tell you, it isn't.
I swear to you.
I don't say you're after it any longer.
But it's all this. Prevents you
treating her like other girls.
You have to admit,
you are a bit respectful.
To Natalia? How not?
Well, bowing's not going
to do you any good.
If I were a girl like Natalia,
I'd be rather impressed by a pounce.
A POunce?
Yes, you know.
Oh, this is impossible.
How can anyone pounce on Natalia?
Anybody can pounce on anybody
and generally they do.
[she laughs]
[music stops, Natalia laughs]
- This was fun, Chris.
-Yes, splendid, Natalia!
- Another record?
-Oh, it's after five.
- We have to fly.
- Oh, no!
- You do not stay for the evening?
-I... I...
It is to be a party,
more people are coming.
We'd have loved to, but we've a friend
and he's feeling awfully bad.
Oh, I'm so sorry.
But my mother and father
went out in the car.
Oh, that's all right,
we'll take the train.
Well, it's a great pity but if you must.
We left Fritz to his fate
and caught up with
our own only too quickly.
Step by step, as we made our way home,
Sally's fever was mounting.
Oh! Look!
Oh, Chris, I feel such a hunger.
- Want a sausage?
- I mean a spiritual hunger.
-Oh, come on!
I've serious thoughts of
becoming a femme fatale.
You know, the kind that bankers
and princes and people fall in love with
and absolutely ruin themselves on.
First, catch your prince.
If I could hire a horse and
go riding in the Tiergarten.
And it could run away with me.
And all of a sudden,
he could sort of dash in.
Oh, all right.
Never get married, Chris.
You're the sort of man who
kills the soul of a woman.
You bring her down to earth
and you make it a desert,
all horrible and dead and dry.
Oh, look at this old thing!
Oh, Chris, I'm so thirsty
and it's all your fault.
When we get back to Hauptstrasse,
I'll buy you a beer.
Beer! [scoffs]
It's the sort of thirst you
don't know anything about.
Oh, Chris!
Oh, I need a champagne cocktail!
I've been in a limousine,
I've been in a wonderful house.
Oh, Chris, if only you could understand.
I know you've got money.
That 7O marks is for our rent tomorrow.
- I've been guarding it for days.
-I know.
- Well, what will Schneider say?
Three marks each for the drinks and
one for the tip, that's only seven marks.
Give her the rest and it will
keep her quiet. Come on!
It's all very well for bankers and princes,
but I can't afford to be ruined.
- Just one, you understand.
[they play a Russian tune]
[he speaks Russian]
[in French]
Champagne cocktails.
[in French]
What sort of champagne, madam?
Real champagne, of course.
I suppose I'd better not ask
for a drop of absinthe in it?
I suppose you'd damn well better not.
Well, anyway, I think you're rather
intimidated by a place like this.
To me it seems the most
natural thing in the world.
More than Ma Schneider's frausy dump anyway.
Where I expect every single night
to be simply crawled on by bedbugs.
Chris, I think we ought to go to
the races every day this spring.
Unless, of course, we're going to do
a lot of sailing. Merci!
You don't know what an utter fool
you look, grinning like that.
The trouble with you, Chris, is you're probably
the most insensitive man that ever lived.
For one thing,
you don't understand women.
I hate to say this, Chris,
but I don't think you're really a writer
and I don't think you really have any talent.
Oh, Chris!
I drank it all up
and I didn't even notice!
Here, have mine.
[in French]
More champagne cocktails.
You have to admit the service
is awfully good here, I like that.
I'd like to come to this place often.
Oh, Chris, don't look so glum.
I mean, if we're going to spend a bit
of the rent money on champagne,
we might as well enjoy it.
- Well, here's to poor old Schneider.
-[Sally chuckles]
Oh, Chris, I'm beginning
to feel so much better!
[she gasps]
[in French] Caviar for madam?
Well, yes. Oui, merci.
Beluga or Astrakhan, Madam?
Oh, some of the big ones.
[in French] The big one, there!
- Pour Monsieur?
- Thank you, no.
I didn't realise I was so hungry.
Nor did I.
Has madame ever tried
the grey Oscietra from the Caspian?
Oh, practically jamais,
but just a little.
Mmm! Chris, you've got to try this.
Only it's a bit salty,
it's made me thirsty.
[in French]
Another champagne cocktail for madam.
This Sevruga caviar
has almost no salt at all.
Oh, I think I should like that! Oui.
Sally, l...
Darling, have you got a cigarette?
Oh, look, Chris!
Yellowish cigarette with tubes!
Oh, what a love! Chris, I've got to have
this bear. I feel so Russian tonight!
Five marks for cigarettes, Monsieur,
and the bear, 20.
Sally, you've gone absolutely
stark, staring, raving mad!
Darling, you can't keep on
counting pennies all the time.
You know, I think I must have
a good deal of Russian blood in me.
My grandmother was a Russian.
She escaped from Russia in
the middle of the winter on a sledge
pursued by wolves,
only she threw a serf to them.
Only 45 marks left and the bill's
going to cost hundreds.
- For four or five champagne cocktails?
-And the caviar.
Oh, but I thought that was free.
I mean, with the drinks, like peanuts.
- Oh, Chris, what will they do to you?
-I shall probably end up in jail.
- No, let's have another drink and talk it over.
-Oh, no, no!
-[in French] Another champagne cocktail, madam?
Now look here, Sally,
there's only one thing to do.
You finish this cursed drink you've just ordered
and walk out. I'll stay here and talk to him.
Oh, no, Chris, you'd only make
an awful mess of it.
- I could do it better.
-Oh, shut up!
Well, that's not very nice
when I'm trying to be helpful.
Any mess you get into, you try and get out of
by using your extremely inadequate sex appeal.
My sex appeal inadequate?
It's adequate.
Oh, Chris, you're so upset or
you wouldn't say a thing like that.
[American accent]
Large Martini.
There's always a way out, Chris.
Lady, how d'you like to tilt
that glass a little bit further?
Oh, but I'm sorry, really!
Don't worry, I like the flavour!
Well, in that case, please.
Oh, well, I never say no to a drink.
- But the next one's on me.
-Oh, no, we couldn't think of it.
- Oh, unless you insist.
-I'm coming up just to do that.
- Now, Chris, don't be an idiot!
-[he chuckles] Well...
- Say, hello.
-[Sally laughs]
Mortimer's the name, Clive Mortimer.
This is my, er, brother, Mr lshervvood,
the Mr lshervvood.
- My name's Sally Bowles.
-Glad to know you, Mrs Bowles.
- Well, if he's your brother...
-Oh, adopted, just adopted.
Yes, just adopted.
As a matter of fact...
If you find it confusing,
his name's Chris and mine's Sally.
Chris, old horse!
I wanna tell you right now,
you got a mighty pretty sister.
Hey, what are you kids drinking, huh?
- Oh, it's called "same again"!
-Best drink in the world.
Here, comm, let's have
the same again all round.
[in French]
Three more champagne cocktails.
Chris, Sally, I got an idea.
A fellow was telling me
that for dinner and a floor show
there's nothing like
the Alhambra Palace Garten.
- Know anything about the joint?
- What?
-We can't afford to go there.
That sounds good!
Is it the tops, the real tops?
- Oh, definitely.
-Gonna have a real good time there?
Why, I simply adore
the Alhambra, whatever it is.
That's where we're going tonight, kids,
the Alhambra Palace Garten.
Hey, comm, let's have the cheque,
the cheque's on me!
And afterwards, the Femina.
[swing jazz plays]
[music stops]
Hello to the Eldorado!
And now to the Resi.
[indistinct chatter and laughter]
[Clive muffled speech]
And now to bed.
[Sally chuckles]
You're a great guy, Chris,
a real great guy.
[Sally chuckles]
But, Sally...
[enigmatic music]
Some people would have called it
an ordinary hangover.
But I was furious with Sally
and felt that I was
on the brink of the grave.
Sally had brought me to this.
I could hardly wait for her return
to tell her that our relationship
was finished.
But low and behold,
she blew in bubbling with life
and had the impudence to imply
that I was jealous.
I do think people are so
ridiculous about love.
I mean, why can't they take it all
as a part of spring?
You know, lambs hopping and corks popping
and all that sort of thing.
[Chris groans]
Well, what are you doing in bed?
Are you really ill?
- Oh, Chris, is it because l...?
-Oh, leave me in peace.
Oh, Chris, I wouldn't dream
of doing such a thing.
[he groans]
Yeah, baby? What is it?
Come up quickly!
It's Chris, he's got...
- Rheumatic fever, I think.
-Rheumatic fever!
- Oh, Chris, I feel terrible.
-So do I!
Oh! You might be crippled for life.
- Oh, Chris, can I rub you?
-Oh, no!!
Where is he?
Show me the old horse!
Who says he's sick?
- I do.
-Well, brother, you oughta know.
You don't look so good.
Rheumatic fever, huh?
[Chris groans]
Oh, look, kid, this is no sort of a dump.
Let's him get him round to the hotel.
There's another bedroom in the suite
on the other side of the living room.
We'll get him there.
Stick him in the back of the car.
Cover him up here and get him down.
Come on, honey, give us a hand, will you?
- Hey, Mama, give us a shove.
-Oh, leave me alone!
Meine kleiner lshyvoo!
I don't think we should add
any more hot water bottles, Clive.
I think we really should have ice bags
to prevent the fluid mounting to the brain.
What fluid?!
Oh, it's nothing, darling.
It's just a silly old book.
Because you see when it gets there...
I read a yarn about a scientific doctor.
Took a guy's brain right out
and put in a chimp's brain.
In no time at all, he was up and around
courting some blonde up a tree.
[Sally] But Chris wants to write a book!
Well, he'll have his chance in bed, won't he?
Now look, once he's turned the corner...
They say champagne's
awfully good for sick people.
That's my department, sister.
I told them as I came in.
Oh, fine, fellows!
Now, put it down.
Clive, darling, perhaps
we should have some brandy too.
It may be his heart.
This guy is going to get
Napoleon brandy.
Oh, Clive, you're wonderful!
It'll give you the will to live,
won't it, darling?
It didn't do much for Napoleon.
[knocking on door]
- Oh.
-Guten Tag.
- Guten Tag.
-Guten Tag, Herr Doktor.
[Sally] Ah, here is your patient.
We thought at first it was rheumatic fever,
but now we're rather inclined
to fear meningitis.
Perhaps I'd better make the examination.
Guten Tag.
Don't you think he seems
rather cold and brutal?
I told them to get us
the best doctor in all Berlin.
- But what's he going to do to him?
-He'll give him the works, honey.
When these Germans examine a guy,
they examine him,
penthouse to basement.
[Chris] Ooh!
You see what I mean?
I hope he makes him well. Then we
could take him for drives in the Tiergarten.
Hire a wheelchair, if you like, baby,
and we'll take him round the nightspots!
Oh, Clive!
[she chuckles]
Don't you think we should let people know?
Oh, just a few close friends, I mean.
Call them up, get 'em around here.
A guy likes to see his pals.
[she chuckles]
No alcohol.
A light supper.
A good night's sleep.
And tomorrow morning
you'll be perfectly well.
Guten Tag.
An idiot, I decided,
but at least a harmless one.
What followed was an absolute nightmare.
Guten Tag.
Clive and Sally were not satisfied
in turning the place into a nightclub.
They wanted a hospital as well.
Did your doctor examine your
sympathetic nervous system?
- Of course, if it's ulcers...
-Or hardening of the arteries.
Or softening of the brain.
I'm going to get this fellow
to work on your spine.
[Clive] Sally! Sally, come here!
Look at this. Now, what does it say?
"Disorders of the blood, brain, nerves,
skin, lungs and bowels.
The water cure."
Pretty well covers the field, huh?
Unless the poor guy's got bunions.
And look at this, a guy with
sparks coming out of him!
[Sally] Electrotherapy.
I'm gonna get these birds.
I'm gonna get them up here right away.
[laughs heartily]
[enthusiastic chatter]
What are you going to do?
Oh, no!
[Chris] I'm perfectly all right!
No, no! No, I mean...
[raucous laughter]
[Chris] Oh, no!
Sally, there are two people
outside to see you.
[she chuckles]
Frulein, if you please,
where is the bathroom?
Oh, there's one through there.
For me is necessary two bathrooms.
One bath very hot, one bath very cold,
for the hydrotherapy.
Oh, in that case there's
another one through there.
Thank you.
- No!
-Come on, bring him over here.
Sally! Sally! No!
Sally! Aghg
Ooh! No!
No! No!
[Chris] No! No!
Say, that masseur's sure feeling his oats.
[Chris] Ow!
Poor Chris!
No, no, no, no!
[enthusiastic chatter]
[Chris] No!
Frulein, is there more ice buckets, please?
- Anything you want!
-Thank you.
Oh, yes! Do come in.
Your patient is having a massage.
[in German]
I need a chair, please.
He says he needs a chair.
Clive, darling, here's the most divinely
sinister little doctor. Do give him a drink.
Aagh! No! No, please don't!
Please! Clive!
Sally! Sally! Clive! No! No!
-[loud Splash]
-[Chris] 00mg
Keep up the singing, kids,
or we'll have the manager in.
Sally, give him a guitar!
[all clamouring]
Baby, m!
[raucous shouting drowns out tune]
Sally! Sally! Sally, please!
Clive! Oh, no!
No, Clive!
Clive, please!
[loud splash, Chris yells]
[Sally] Yippee!
[all singing along]
Sally, Clive!
Clive! All this is doing
Chris so much good.
[loud splash, Chris yells]
Clive, wouldn't it be wonderful
if we could spend the rest
of our lives helping sick people?
-[drunkenly] Have a sort of a hospital.
-Sure, baby!
Oooh! I must get some more medicine.
[honky-tonk piano playing]
Darling, it's gonna be all right!
Everything's going to just be wonderful!
Darling, it's gonna be all right,
I promise you!
It's absolutely wonderful!
It's gonna be all right, darling.
Absolutely fine!
[apparatus rattling]
[Sally chuckles]
[Sally screams]
[gasps screaming]
[birds chirping]
I awoke feeling a new man.
I was rested, relaxed, my muscles
toned up beyond belief.
I borrowed a pair of pants
and went back home.
I was inspired.
My style seemed to
crackle with electricity.
No doubt I could have
written a masterpiece.
But my dear friends turned up
and dragged me out again.
You're here! Come on, let's
get him out there quick, shall we?
[Clive chuckles]
[exhilarating music]
Now and then,
I was ashamed about sponging,
but, what with Sally's childish enjoyment
and her winning ways...
Clive being so warm and giving
and my own lack of system,
I was content to play along.
Until one afternoon that
madness reached its climax
and Clive insisted we should all go to...
Honolulu and then places!
Baby, we're off to Honolulu!
[he sings a melody]
- Hey, look at these folders.
-Oh, no, there's a limit to everything.
Hey, look, pal! Tahiti.
Where Cezanne cut his ear off?
-[slow beat on bass drum]
-Oh, what's that?
Some guy's funeral.
Say, are they giving him the works.
Stressberg probably.
It was in the papers today.
That old guy the Nazis bumped off?
Boy, is this a town to get out of.
[Clive] Now, look...
Japan, Singapore.
Oh, is there a bar there?!
The Long Bar they call it.
But I can't travel with you and Sally.
Chris, why ever not?
It'd be sheer, absolute heaven.
Well, for one thing I...
I don't have any money.
Don't worry about money.
Now look, India!
Where some marvellous maharajah
would offer me my weight in diamonds
to spend one night in his harem!
[slow beat on bass drum]
[Clive] Egypt!
Floating down the Nile with the desert
all around us in the moonlight
and those sinister, sensual Arabs
watching us from the tops of pyramids.
Oh, Chris, pal!
- Come on!
-Well ...
- I... I don't know.
That's the stuff, that's what I like to hear.
Now listen, kids, you'll need some tropical kit.
I got to go to Paris for a couple of days, but
while I'm gone get your outfits, all you need.
I'll be back Thursday. We leave Friday.
Next stop, Honolulu!
[Hawaiian music plays]
- We shall never come back, you know.
-Well, who wants to come back?
I can see us ten years from now.
You married to Clive and I'll be
a sort of... private secretary.
A bit glassy in the eye,
a bit heavier around the jowl.
Not if you take plenty of exercise.
Oh, darling, here's your tropical kit.
Do try it on again.
Anyway, you'll write your book
in the next few months
and it'll be... Oh, it'll be one
of those round-the-world books.
They're always a success.
An escapist bestseller.
Tahiti, Honolulu. Ten days
that didn't shake the world.
I suppose people felt like this
in the Middle Ages
when they sold their souls to the devil.
Chris, you look marvellous!
You look absolutely irresistible.
[he sighs]
You say the craziest things.
There's always a moment
when it's not too late, Sally.
And when you have your last chance...
no one ever seems to take it.
[she sings a melody]
-[knocking on door]
-Come in.
Hello, Fritz!
- So you're ultimately off, eh?
-Yes, they go. Both going away.
My other room's empty.
What am I to do?
Oh, Schneiderchen, darling,
you'll get other tenants.
- They don't match after all.
-Other tenants?
In these times,
when the banks close down
and the knackwurst is one mark and 50.
And even the potatoes will get up.
Oh, everything goes wrong.
It is the Jews, believe me!
A plot to bring the country down.
Well, you know that's absolutely rubbish!
You should listen to the radio,
to the speeches, Herr lssyvoo.
But you don't care,
you are going away.
How are you, Fritz?
Not good.
Not good at all.
Oh, Chris, not more of your things!
We'll be here till Christmas.
How's Natalia?
You remember the advice you gave me?
I attempt it. It has put her against me.
She sends me a note that she will not
see me. She will never see me again.
You must have made an awful mess of it.
That is possible, but I love her.
Also she is worried about
all the attacks on the Jews.
It's not my fault that her father
gets threatening letters all the time.
Oh, from some lousy Nazi, I suppose.
Every day they get something.
When I tried to comfort her,
she screams at me
that her father is worried sick
and her mother is falling down fainting,
and now will I go please?
Please, please, please!
So I go.
Well, maybe if you went back
in a day or two?
Can I tell you something? Sally too.
Yes, of course.
Sally, these are yours!
It is something so bad, so disgusting,
I... I don't know how to...
- It can't be!
-What is it?
Oh, it's nothing.
Errn... Look, Fritz,
we've got a terrible lotto do.
Oh, Sally, no.
Yes, we have!
Oh, look, Fritz, I'm not trying
to get rid of you, but...
Ja, ja. Of course.
I understand.
Well, goodbye.
Goodbye, Chris.
- Fritz, wait a minute!
-No, it doesn't matter. I go.
Sally, that was cruel.
There's something wrong.
Fritz is in trouble!
Yes, well, so are we, real trouble.
Listen to this.
"Sally dear. So sorry
must postpone ourjaunt.
Crazy people here insist
on trip up the Amazon.
Let's hope for next year or some time.
Love to both, Clive."
I mean, this is an outrage! What does
he think we are, brushing us off like this?
What we are, I suppose,
something rather cheap.
Oh, don't start moralising!
I'd wish I'd started sooner.
At least he could let us know
before we spent all our money.
All whose money?!
Oh, all right, make yourself out a saint,
now you can't do anything else.
Pretend you're glad of it!
Yes, I am. I most certainly am!
We were well off before, I suppose?
Shut up in this hole
not even able to go out to a cafe'.
You moaning and groaning all the time
and sucking my blood
like some dreary, clammy,
pill-taking vampire!
Just because you have to have
someone to talk to about art!
And your precious book
that you can't even write.
Just because you want to be known as
the most wonderful writer in the world.
And then along comes Clive
and you're jealous of of him.
- You believe that?
- Because he was a man!
-Not a very fastidious one.
What do you mean by that?
I dare you to tell me what you mean by that.
I mean... Well, you're leaving this room.
You can take your things, take everything
if you like and move out of here.
I wouldn't stay here if you
begged me on your knees.
- To be nagged and preached at by you!
You can finish your packing.
I'm going out and when I come back...
Don't worry, I'll be gone!
[knocking on door]
Hello, Fritz.
Not gone yet?
Not going-
Everything's off.
Fritz, what was you trying to say?
It didn't sound like nothing.
What is not said...
What else can it sound like?
Now look, Fritz...
Better I keep it to myself.
A drink?
No, thank you.
Fritz, I... I came to apologise.
I've been...
It's not easy to say one's
ashamed of oneself.
Supposing you were a Jew?
What do you mean?
And then denied it,
lied about it?
That's what I had to say.
That I am a cheat, a coward, a liar.
- Oh, come now, Fritz.
-Well, now you know.
When did you start being
that particular sort of idiot?
Oh, years ago.
- When I left school.
-Things that happened there?
When I came to Berlin, I thought,
"No more of that."
And I suppose having given people
the wrong impression,
you found it hard to take it back?
I did not want to take it back.
I wanted to be smart set and popular.
Make a rich marriage.
Here in Germany, Chris,
even before Hitler,
people made it miserable to be a Jew.
They made it uncomfortable.
You made it miserable.
Free English lesson.
All right, from now on
I won't be miserable anymore.
Everyone shall know.
Have you told Natalia?
It is because of her that I...
I can no longer...
I will no longer...
If she and her family are to be
threatened and insulted than I too.
Have you told her?
She'll hear of it.
Not from you?
And get my face spat into?
She already hates me.
That's not enough?
Do you think it... it would
hurt her less if I went there?
Told her myself?
I told you I'm a coward.
"Was", past tense. Another free lesson.
When I left Fritz...
it seemed I was back in real life again
after a long, crazy dream.
It's amazing how little
of the world one can see
from the back seat of someone else's car.
[in German]
What do we have here?
They broke everything.
But now I was walking
and on my own two feet.
[Nazi in German]
And that's why we Germans
have to live today in rubbish and shame...
because some Jewish servants
and parasites sold us!
But the dawn of liberation is here.
Our Fijhrer, Adolf Hitler, has risen
and is calling to you, "Germany awake!"
Us nationalists...
[all clamouring]
When I now think of all that's
happened in the world since then,
that little scuffle seemed
nothing to write home about.
But it got me out of my
wretched protective shell.
Now with Sally off my neck,
I was ready to start a new chapter.
Herr lssyvoo! Herr lssyvoo!
- Never would have thought it of him.
-What's that?
Really! Herr lssyvoo, this is
not good to treat a young lady so.
For this I am ashamed of you.
Now, I'm going to make her
some herb tea to calm her.
- Is she still here?
-Is she still here!
[in German]
Such vulgarity, such rudeness!
Oh, these men!
These men!
What have you been saying to Schneider?
I don't know.
Maybe she thinks somehow
that you're the father.
The what?!
The father.
Chris, what's happened to you?
Oh, nothing.
Do you mean to say that you're...?
I'm afraid so.
I've been worried about it
for quite a time.
Tried not to think about it.
Then just now I was...
I was going for the taxi and I...
I felt faint all of a sudden.
But this is serious.
You do sort of find the right word
for things, darling, don't you?
Hadn't you better lie down and rest?
Are you angry that I'm still here?
Chris, I'm frightened.
I've made things up so much and...
never thought about anything.
Now it's here and it's real.
Don't worry, we'll see this through.
Well, hadn't we better
get in touch with him?
I mean, you can always find a person.
Oh, I know.
Actually, he sent another telegram,
telling me about some
film friend of his in Paris.
Sort of passing me on, I suppose.
Chris, don't talk to me about Clive.
All the same...
I think we ought to be awfully
practical about having this baby.
- Practical is just not having it.
-I suppose so.
But still, I don't like the idea.
I'm not exactly crazy about it, darling.
Would it help at all if I...
if you were...
if it was official?
If we got married?
Oh, Chris.
I mean, I'll marry you if it will
do any good. It needn't be...
Oh, Chris, I'll never forget you
saying that, never.
[She laughs] Oh!
There is a limit, even for me.
Here, dearfrulein,
is some good herb tea.
Frulein Schneider, there's been
a lot of misunderstanding,
about Fraulein Sally leaving,
about her little trouble,
and about the man who's
responsible for all this.
He's left the country and I never
want to see him again.
Then indeed, Herr lssyvoo, I'm sorry.
I misunderstood.
So, no marriage?
[she tuts]
That is sad.
Then for a young lady in such misfortune
there is nothing but Frau Pezelsberger.
Is she a doctor?
Herr lssyvoo, she is everything.
If you have a wart, heaven forbid,
or a carbuncle,
she'll charm it away.
If you wish a young lady
to fall in love with you,
she will give you to put into her coffee.
- If you wish your fortune told...
-But where does she live?
Oh, no, that sort of thing will never do.
Frulein, Sally must have
the best attention, the best possible.
Naturally, but, Herr lshyvoo,
that needs much money.
Well, we can sell all this stuff.
We'll get something for it.
Not much, darling,
we tried everything on so much
and there's some egg
on that negligee already.
Well, if it isn't enough, I can work.
[fervent music]
I wrote about the subject nearest at hand.
What I'd seen and felt on that
walk back from Fritz's place.
"Portrait of Berlin" I called it.
I went out and took it to the Berlin
editor of an American magazine.
I've been waiting and waiting
for you to come in.
- Well, this is good.
-Good? It's wonderful! What do you think?
- They're going to be married.
Natalia's father's going to Switzerland
and Fritz is going too.
He's going to be a sort of a partner.
Oh, not a business partner.
There's other work to do.
And Natalia's going to have millions
of the most divine babies.
Oh, I'm so glad.
Does make one feel sort of old-fashioned.
Chris, you would not believe it.
- When I told her, she...
- Didn't spit in your eye?
- She knew it all the time.
-[Natalia] We must go.
There is much to do.
- Are you going for good?
-I do not know.
But I must believe that one day
the German people will understand
what these Nazis are.
And then you'll come back?
But you write to us and visit us
if you can, both of you.
- Goodbye, Natalia.
-Goodbye, Chris.
- Goodbye, Natalia. Good luck.
-Goodbye, Fritz.
Goodbye, Sally.
- Goodbye, Sally.
-Goodbye, Fritz.
Well... I must say my advice
turned out rather well.
Anyway, that takes the shine
out of my little triumph.
All the same, he read it, he liked it,
he paid for it, cash on the barrel head.
Chris, I think you're wonderful!
And with what we got for the clothes
and things, it'll pay for everything.
I called the place. You can go there right away.
They'll see you this afternoon.
And by tomorrow, maybe it'll be all over.
- Well... Well, I suppose l...
I suppose I'd better change
and get a toothbrush or something.
Well... Now, tell me what happened.
What did the editor say?
Well, he seemed an awfully
nice sort of chap.
And he said he's going to build it up
with a lot of photographs.
Oh, yes, he wants to see me
again this afternoon.
What about?
Well, he didn't say, except I suppose he wants
to make some changes or something.
- Chris, you mustn't come another step!
-But why not?
No, no, you must go back to that editor.
- But I can't let you go to that place all alone.
-Nonsense, Chris.
Now, look, he may be testing you
to see if you're keen.
He may be... He may be
going to offer you a terrific job.
He may be going to retire and be looking for
some brilliant young man to take his place.
Oh, please, Chris.
Well, all right.
And look, darling, there is
something you can do for me.
You send me some
marvellous bunch of flowers
and write something absolutely
throbbing on the card,
so I can show it to the nurses,
so they won't think I'm...
Well, you know.
Good luck, darling.
When I got back to the editor,
he had marvellous news for me
and a breathtaking question.
Now, can you leave tomorrow?
- Erm...
-You're a free agent.
- Well, I...
-No wife, no family.
- No.
-Well, fine!
Now listen, I'm in a rush,
so we'll talk in the car.
I'll drop you off near your home, see?
Now, I get the idea, a portrait on Madrid,
a portrait on Stockholm.
A portrait on...
A copy for you. And if I don't
see you tomorrow, good luck!
- Thank you.
-And watch that deadline.
$250 and all expenses paid!
I was raring to go.
I felt quite a pang at leaving Sally,
but I knew she was in good hands
and well looked after.
[Sally sings]
Rock-a-bye baby
On the tree top
When the wind blows
The cradle will rock
When the bough breaks
The cradle will fall
And down will come baby
Cradle and all
Chris, darling, I've changed my mind.
I think I began to when Natalia was here
talking about the millions of marvellous
babies she was going to have.
Well then, oh, Chris,
on the way to that dreadful place,
there was a traffic jam
and the taxi stopped in front of
the most wonderful shop in the world.
All for little children.
It was full of cradles and bottles,
and little clothes and little shoes.
Yes, but...
So I thought that...
well, as you were so terribly decent
as to say we could get married...
I said what?!
Oh, Chris.
You're quite right. I absolutely did.
Oh, dear.
Oh, darling!
I knew you wouldn't let me down.
So I went in and I bought a few things.
And when I came out, I saw
the policeman who'd held up the traffic.
Now, Chris, don't scoff at me,
but it seemed to me
he had the face of an angel.
If I ever find him, he will have.
Everything's going to be
absolutely perfect!
The only trouble is I can't find
a really ideal name.
There's a whole list in the encyclopedia.
Aaron lshervvood.
Abel lshervvood.
Anthony lshervvood.
Anthony's not bad.
But not for first.
- There's Athelstan lshervvood.
-What did you say?!
"Athelstan", darling.
That sort of name has an awful effect
on a person's love life, don't you think?
No, no, before that. About Anthony.
Oh, not for the first, I said.
Then of course, it my be a girl.
In that case it could be
Ada lshervvood, Adeline...
Why do you look like that, darling?
You don't want it to be
an only child, do you?
They always gave complexes and our children
must be sound in mind and body.
Oh, that's remind me, my milk.
What are you doing?
Daddy is going to have a drink too.
Alcohol is rightly called treacherous.
The bottle I took to bed with me did
nothing but remind me of other bottles.
The bed seemed to rock
like that confounded cradle.
If I dozed for a moment,
I had visions of a boy like Clive,
followed by a string of little girls
all exactly like Sally.
I don't think my health has ever completely
recovered from the agony of that night.
- Sleep well, darling?
Well, here's our coffee.
I made it good and strong.
Coffee? But I thought
you were drinking milk.
Well, milk's all right. Personally, I think
a dash of absinthe would improve it.
This morning it's coffee.
- Now about Theodore...
Ishervvood. It's the name I chose
last night while you were out.
Oh, well, I forget what I was
going to say about him.
Darling... there's something
I have to tell you.
Sally, please don't tell me anymore.
Not today, if possible not at all.
But, darling, it could change your plans.
They are very much changed already.
But could change them back again.
You see, darling...
Well, I was never much good at arithmetic.
Sally, do you mean...?
I mean that people who are
strange and extraordinary,
and terrific sort of personalities are...
are usually rather above being
good at figures and all that.
I could never understand dates.
Yes, Sally, but Theodore?
Tell me, please, is he...?
He isn't.
I suppose, in a way,
he never really was.
He was a mistake?
Oh! I don't think it's very nice to call
him that. Behind his back, I mean.
Sit down, relax.
I'll get the rest of the breakfast.
I can tell by the way you talk you're
not thinking of marriage anymore.
[she laughs]
You never really wanted to marry me, Chris.
I'm suppose I'm not the marrying kind.
The taxi's here, frulein.
[in German]
This suitcase here, please.
You're leaving?
For Paris, of course.
Oh, Chris, you forget everything.
I told you about that friend of Clive's
who makes the most terrific films.
Well, Clive said in his telegram
that he told him all about me
and he was longing to meet me.
- Well, you know what that means?
-Yes, I'm afraid I do.
Well then?
Oh, darling!
Oh, don't come down.
I'll take my last look at you
in the room here.
Oh, Chris.
- It has been fun.
-Hasn't it?
You remember the very first day I was here?
I said I'd inspire you.
You didn't quite believe me,
did you, darling?
I mean, you did sort of
look like a dying fish.
But you see, it's all come true!
I mean, you really have
written something at last.
You wouldn't have except for me.
Well, that's inspiring, isn't it?
In a slightly unusual sort of way.
Well, nothing's quite usual, Chris.
Life isn't like that.
You certainly aren't.
I should hope not.
I mean, have every sort of adventure,
be the most wonderful, fabulous personality.
Oh, and you'll be a success too, Chris,
in a writer-ish sort of way.
Darling, I must fly or I'll miss my train.
I almost wish I would.
Goodbye, Chris.
Goodbye, Sally.
- I'll send you a postcard.
- Do.
I do love you.
- Goodbye.
-Goodbye, Sally.
[whimsical music]
Of course, the promised postcard
never arrived.
And perhaps it's just as well.
Who knows? I might have got
embroiled with her again.
[man chuckles]
Well, I suppose I'd better go and say,
"How do you do?"
I must admit...
when I saw her name on the book
I felt a sudden shudder,
as if someone was
walking over my grave.
Grave of your youth.
We can thank heaven on our bended knees
we've managed to reach years of discretion.
Oh, Chris, how absolutely
marvellous to see you!
I've been sitting here surrounded
by the most lascivious-looking critics.
Have I changed?
Not in the very least.
Well, you have. You...
You seem more mature, more manly.
[she chuckles]
You were so absolutely
unbelievably adolescent,
so repressed, darling, in those days.
- You live in London?
-Yes, I have a little house.
Oh, how marvellous!
I mean, I'm stuck here in the most
dreary little furnished room.
What, with all this?
A successful authoress?
Yes, I get terrific royalties.
Do you know when?
After the first 200,000 copies
have been sold.
Well, presently, I've just been
writing my head off, you know.
Last night, we had a little
celebration in my place
and the landlady came in and made
the most boring remarks.
So I have to leave.
I suppose we'd better find you a hotel.
Well, to tell you the truth, darling,
I haven't got a penny in the world.
Well, there's only one thing for it.
You'd better come home with me.
Oh! Well, all right.
I... I mean, there's a spare room in...
in which I could, erm...
Oh, darling!
You still are rather like Sir somebody
or other, aren't you?
Goodbye, everybody!
I was hoping you'd ask me.
Darling, you look marvellous with grey hair!
You look absolutely irresistible!
[she chuckles]