I'm Chevy Chase and You're Not (2025) Movie Script

1
The following programme contains
strong language and adult humour.
Please be aware that this programme
features some discriminatory content.
Mm-mm...
I'm gonna swap this water out.
OK.
What the fuck happened?
Go ahead, enjoy your breakfast,
don't worry.
Don't mind me.
Enjoy my breakfast?!
Jesus Christ!
I have eggs or cereal every morning.
That's what keeps me
a little overweight!
Here, Pat, take this for a sec.
Hold onto it forever.
I think we're ready!
You see, sir,
we're not gunfighters...
We're movie stars!
He has this glint in his eye
that makes you feel that
there's a big brain in there
and it's ready to say
something really funny
or sarcastic or edgy!
Listen, it's Glory, right?
You're a really nice girl
and I'm a nice guy
and you're very pretty.
What do you say?
Would you like to take a shower?
He didn't really have
a lot of boundaries.
He was very, very free.
Drink this...
And it's off to bed.
You should've been a doctor.
OK,
we'll play whatever you like!
His random lines
just pop into my head all the time!
You take drugs, Danny?
Every day! Good!
We always had this chemistry...
That was just always there.
Would you like something to drink?
Helen, you want something?
No, no, thank you.
Uh, I'll have a Coke.
Do you want that in the can?
No, I'll have it right here!
And now, for those of our viewers
who may be Holsteins or Herefords...
Our top story tonight...
I immediately fell in love with that
bumbling idiot doing Weekend Update!
I'm talking about Chevy,
not the character he played!
I give you
the Griswold family Christmas tree!
I spent most days in between
scenes in his trailer with him
and his makeup artist Lee
listening to the filthiest jokes
I have ever heard in my life!
Little kid
in the fourth grade who says,
"Hey, Dad, I've got the biggest
dick in the fourth grade!
Is that 'cause I'm Black?"
"No, son, it's 'cause you're 19!"
I could see, you know, right away,
this guy is simultaneously talented
and VERY dangerous!
He has this charisma...
The asshole who you love!
Can I say 'asshole'?
A lot of people will, unfortunately!
Chevy Chase, has he worn out his
welcome in the entertainment world?
Yeah, he might've been nasty
to other people but he...
He and I were like that!
I was
always kinda hopin' in my heart,
it was like,
"They don't get this guy!"
And when I met him
I understood perfectly
that everything I'd ever read
was probably true!
Maybe you wanna come at me
for a while.
I will, Chevy...
No, no, come on, let's do it now!
No, come on,
let's talk about my married life!
I want you... No, come on, man!
What about my shirt? Like it?
Look, they're coming back!
Quiet down!
I'm talking, OK?
You like my shirt?
Fuck you, fuckhead, OK?
How's that? Put that on tape!
I don't think he consciously
wants to be an asshole.
I think what
the asshole version of him...
Is somebody who is desperate
for something he either lost
or doesn't have
or just getting old...
I'm just trying to figure you out.
No shit!
It's not gonna be easy for you!
Why is it not gonna be easy?
Uh, you're not bright enough!
How's that?
Whoa!
Well, you asked!
I know you're not gonna
put that on the air and I hope not
but my answer is
I'm complex and I'm deep
and I can be hurt easily
and I react spontaneously to people
who want to figure me out,
as it were.
Uh, as somebody who
will hold up my guard.
I'm not gonna let anybody
figure me out, per se.
My Old School
I remember
the 35 sweet goodbyes
I first met Chevy
in the dining commons at Bard.
I noticed that there was
this buffoon at the table
that would do
very peculiar things.
Reach for the salt and knock over
a water onto somebody's lap.
To find you with the workin' girls
in the county jail
Chevy often
fell down flights of stairs
and it wasn't by accident!
To my old school!
Don Fagen and Walter Becker,
we had a group in college
called the Very Bad Jazz Band.
I was a drummer at the time.
As we emerged from college,
it was called Steely Dan.
I really knew jazz.
And I know
what a great drummer is, you know,
and I said, "Go get a good drummer!"
And I left!
Blythe Danner,
that was my first real love,
was Blythe.
She's a great woman
and, uh,
I'll always think highly of her.
Blythe and Chevy had different paths
post-college.
Blythe is a very skilled actress
and Blythe's career
took off almost immediately.
Meanwhile,
Chevy did not take off immediately.
The man's name
was Cornelius Crane Chase.
Now, that kind of implies money.
But he sure had no money
when I knew him.
I grew up in New York City
in a wine family.
My father started a store
called Sherry Lehmann.
My father loved Chevy.
When Chevy
applied to Sherry Lehmann,
his application...
He just makes fun of the questions.
"Have you committed any crimes?"
"No, because crime doesn't pay."
Every Picture Tells A Story
I drove a specific truck,
delivering wines from
Sherry Lehmann Wines and Liquors.
My brother Peter
has been friends with Chevy
since they went to Bard College
together.
Daddy said,
"Son, you'd better see the world!"
I remember when he would visit,
if I spent eight hours with him
I would be laughing for eight hours!
Our great-grandfather passed away
and left an inheritance
of, you know...
I mean, eight grand.
And Chevy took the whole amount
and went and bought
a used Rolls-Royce.
Played big-wig in that.
He met a girl named Susan
and they did get married.
And that lasted for a while.
You've been married three times.
Jacqueline was the first.
I thought there was someone before?
Oh, that's right... Susan!
How could I forget?
'Cause I want to?
No, Susan and I were married
for about four years.
Woo!
Was knocked down
by a human stampede
Got arrested for incitin'
a peaceful riot
New York was filthy, dirty
and there wasn't much prosperity
in the mere fact that
we could live on Madison Avenue
and Chevy on Lexington.
It's just impossible now.
His apartment was just horrible.
There were cockroaches everywhere.
Gettin' enough...
At that age, somehow
we felt like we owned New York!
Oh, my dear,
I'd better get out of here
'Fore the Vatican
don't give no sanction
I wasn't ready for that,
no, no...
One day, I was walking home
and I bumped into Chris Guest.
He said, "We're forming
a humour and music group...
And the National Lampoon Lemmings
is producing it.
Wondered if you knew anyone funny who
could also perform with an instrument?"
So, I said,
"Well, obviously,
we went to Bard College together,
the three of us,
Chevy is an obvious choice."
And he said, "Yeah, why don't you
tell him to come and try out?
But he's not my favourite person..."
He was well-liked by many people
but others didn't get
his sense of humour
and thought he was an asshole.
And so, I went back to Chevy's
and I told him and Chevy said,
"I don't know."
Susan said, "Get out of
the bed and go do something!
You're so lazy!"
I used to say to Chevy,
"You're not using
your God-given talents!"
So, Chevy went down and tried out
and, next thing you know,
National Lampoon Lemmings
was formed
and he was part of the troupe.
Whoa, Colorado's callin' me
Hey, dude!
From her glaciers and her canyons
And her Badlands...
I went every night
because it was so funny!
The first half of it was skits,
the second-half was a lampooning
of the Woodstock Concert.
Lonely
at the bottom of the barrel!
Chevy played piano, guitar, drums.
I got into arts and crafts,
lady got into leather
It was funny as heck to me.
Our mother went, like, once
and didn't go back!
Oh...
No... Look at this baby!
Look at that!
Say hi!
This is gonna be
your audience later!
Oh, my goodness...
Isn't this the best cat?
My mother is very musical.
She was a concert pianist.
She didn't follow up on it...
But I could hear her
once in a while
playing something like Debussy
or Chopin or...
They had a beautiful touch.
Like, notes of, like,
a string of pearls.
I started playing the piano
'cause it was there, basically.
Tinkling on it
and taught myself
over the last 50 years.
I played by ear
and I don't read music.
My brother and I
would listen to jazz a lot
on a '78 record player.
That's what sort of got me doing it,
you know, playing jazz...
It's improvisation,
which is very close to acting.
Mel Brooks once defined comedy
as polite hostility.
Once you lose that,
once you limit yourself
to saying...
"Well, that's not funny
or that can't be funny
or you can't do jokes on that..."
Then you've limited yourself to the point
where you're ineffective as a comedian.
Lorne Michaels,
when he's given the job to develop
a show for Saturday nights,
he's got a blank slate.
I'd spent my twenties
in a television studio,
so I was comfortable
in that environment.
We were...
Just filled with possibility of what
we could do and what we couldn't do.
When I met with Lorne,
he described this new show.
It spun my head around.
He said it would be live,
be 11:30 to 1:00 on Saturday night...
And I go, "What?!
Who's gonna watch that?"
You know, angry people!
People who are not gettin' laid!
I got a call...
Lorne said, "Do you wanna
start this show with me?"
If you could try to look at me instead
of looking directly into camera...
It's hard for me.
Why?
Because I invented Weekend Update
so I COULD look in the camera!
Tell me about that.
The fuck, man?
What the fuckin' shit, man?
I wanted him to be a writer
but he really wanted
to be in the cast
and I had room
for only six people.
We had our final reading
of the first script
with all of us around a big table
and I did some reading.
He was funny in what I would
describe as the right kind of way
and he had
a level of confidence.
I think he saw that,
given the cast,
that I could be the handsome one!
Live from New York,
it's Saturday night!
I had heard of Chevy's reputation,
what a spectacular
physical comedian he was,
how funny, how gifted...
Just masterful physical comedy.
What's wrong with expressing
our patriotism?
I'm proud to diaper my baby
with the stars and stripes
or to stroll on the boardwalk
wearing an Old Glory leisure suit!
Chevy winds up being
the last one officially hired
and, interesting point,
does not sign a contract.
..so I can be reminded
again and again and again...
Gives him a sense of freedom.
If you sign that contract,
you're not going anywhere else.
I refer to saliva
disbursement difficulties
or, as we are sometimes called,
'droolers'.
We at the Droolers
Anti-Defamation League
are working to correct
the negative image of droolers
propagated by the media.
When I saw Saturday Night Live,
it absolutely blew my doors off
and I set out to sign
everyone on the show!
No, New Shimmer
is a dessert topping!
It's a floor wax!
It's a dessert topping!
It's a floor wax,
I'm tellin' you!
It's a dessert topping, you cow!
Hey, hey, hey, calm down, you two!
New Shimmer's a floor wax
AND a dessert topping!
Automatically,
he's markedly different.
Chevy doesn't really care
about being liked.
You're doing very well so far.
Everybody loves the show.
The song was great.
And, uh, all I can say is relax
and take your shirt off.
All too soon, he's giving notes
to his other cast members.
Danny came up to my office, he said,
"You gotta talk to Chase."
And I said, "What?"
He said, "He gave me notes
on my Scottish accent!"
That's not a great recipe
for being one of the gang!
Carol Burnett
was the big show at the time.
Won Emmy after Emmy.
Chevy or Lorne would say,
"If you come up with an idea..."
The understanding was,
"OK, Carol Burnett would do it this way,
how are we gonna do it?"
It's just a word association,
I'll throw you out a few words.
Anything that comes to your mind,
just throw back at me, OK?
Just kind of an arbitrary thing,
like if I said dog you'd say...
Tree.
Tree.
These little asides
about drugs and sex and race
and, you know,
he sort of personified that...
That dangerous quality
Saturday Night Live had at the time.
Negro.
Whitey.
Tar baby...
What'd you say?
Lorne had said
from the very beginning,
"Let's just make each other laugh
and if we do that
we'll put it on television."
It was exciting
and it was, uh, terrifying!
Spear-chucker!
White trash!
Jungle bunny!
Honky!
Spade!
Honky-honky!
Nigger!
Dead honky!
He became a writer for me.
I never asked him to do it.
He came in to say,
"Hey, I'm gonna write for your ass!"
And now as a public service
to those of our viewers
who have difficulty
with their hearing,
our top story tonight...
OUR TOP STORY!
President Ford is finally
over that stubborn week-long cold.
..STUBBORN WEEK-LONG COLD!
The news for the hard of hearing is a piece
that he came up with which only he and I did.
And now Weekend Update
with Chevy Chase.
No...
I love it when you make noise!
Remember when... Gotta go!
Good evening,
I'm Chevy Chase and you're not!
His delivery,
"I'm Chevy Chase and you're not!"
You know, the arrogance
of the WASP-y upper class,
it worked perfectly
for the acerbic tone of Update.
Originally, he had
a funny name for his character
and I went,
"No, just say your real name."
Two weeks late,
that could be emotion!
Don't worry about it,
I'll take care of it, OK?
OK, goodbye, Barbara...
Margaret, I'm sorry!
Good evening,
I'm Chevy Chase and you're not!
Lorne used to describe the ratings,
that it would start and then would
get a bump at Weekend Update.
The president is seen here
wearing a corsage
given to him at an
artificial limb-maker's convention.
Chevy had this runway
in Weekend Update.
They created an environment
where he could be himself.
That's when he starts to really make
a much larger impression.
There was something
that was so much...
Just fun about all the things
that he would do
and he was fearless.
Oh, hi!
I'm Ronald Reagan!
Oh, sure, I play the organ too!
Saturday Night Live
was sort of an extension
of '60s counter-culture
and recreational drugs...
What can you say, they were...
They were absolutely everywhere
at that time!
We started making money and...
Tuesday became the late night
on the show to write the scripts
because read-through
was on Wednesday
and to help stay up
as we made money
people were doing drugs.
Hello?
Everybody was taking cocaine
on the show.
You have a disposable income
you never had and...
The drug cocaine is not a friend
of any personality, I don't think!
You know, Gilda called it
the devil's dandruff!
I tried every powder and pill going.
We all did back then.
I didn't much like the coke, though.
The person that they worried about
the most was Chevy.
He was doing a lot of drugs.
Handling a lot of fame really fast,
while on drugs
when you don't have
the strongest emotional foundation,
that's a lot to stay balanced,
to stay upright on your surfboard
in such choppy surf!
He was the one
that people went nuts over.
Gilda once told me
that she went to Florida
and her mother said,
"Do you, like, really know him?"
Feeling famous
wasn't a big deal to me.
I didn't care one way or the other,
really.
Let's start again so you say it
in a complete sentence.
You bitch!
OK...
I was on a bus.
I looked up
and there was a picture of me
on the cover of New York Magazine
and I realised that's it,
I'm famous
then I just looked around
at everybody like this...
We go to the Emmy Awards and...
The nominees are...
We were at the grownups table now.
It was Carol Burnett.
There's the old guard.
And here were these bunch of hooligans,
you know, dressed in tuxedos.
And the winner is...
Chevy Chase!
NBC's Saturday Night!
At the Emmys,
we all won for writing
and I won for best show
and it was...
Wow, you know?
Uh, impossible not to get
carried away!
Needless to say, this is, uh...
Totally expected on my part.
Uh...
Jacqueline, she was beautiful.
I would show her picture to Lorne
and say...
"Well, you know!"
Lorne would say,
"You don't love her!"
"What do you mean? Look at her!"
He fell in love with Jacqueline.
That was a tactical error
on many levels.
Jacqueline
wouldn't move to New York City
and I wanted to be with her.
There was those rumours
that, you know,
he was given an ultimatum
by Jacqueline.
OK, quiet on the floor, please!
He said, "My girlfriend
wants to live in LA."
It spoke to people
thinking he was disingenuous.
You guys all went to LA
for his wedding?
Yeah, and I remember
being on the plane,
everyone...
There was a lottery,
we wrote down dates we thought...
You know,
the divorce would happen, OK?
So, it was like,
"Yeah, yeah, this is gonna last!"
God...
Um...
I was just off.
I don't think I really understood
what I wanted.
A birdy told Gilda
and Gilda told me.
That's how I found out
that Chevy was leaving the show.
It was shocking...
We... We'd just started!
We were just at the Emmys where all the
grownups are first finding out what...
Who we are and what we're doing!
Why now?
I never had any plans ever.
Uh, I had agents who had plans.
So, uh...
And at the time I was hot
so it wasn't too tough
for the agents to see that.
I said,
"We're just beginning here.
I think you're at the centre of it."
But we were never gonna fight.
Neither of us would've done that.
The forces pulling him
was money, power, and all of that
and when Hollywood wants you
they're pretty good at it.
He used to say, "Jackie doesn't
like me when I'm performing.
I turn into somebody.
My ego comes out
and she doesn't like it.
She would rather
I just be a writer."
In hindsight,
I felt it was a mistake to...
Leave SNL.
It really was the kind of show
that I was a part of making
with Lorne
and it's the kind of thing
I wanted to do.
This is a weekly pull.
Chevy gets fan mail weekly.
And it's kind of a massive amount,
so this is sort of...
A little bit.
This is half of a weekly amount.
This looks good,
it's "priorytet"!
That means it's from Poland.
Let's see what we got.
I hope there are
no animal parts in there!
"I would like to write you a big
thank you for all the excellent roles
and the endless emotions
that I experienced."
Thank you.
"One of the films which I am
emotionally attached to is Foul Play.
If you could find a moment to sign photos,
it would be priceless for me."
Sometimes you get mail from dogs,
actual animals!
Joy Heath!
"Please shoot my husband!"
Oh...
We met about
four or five years ago.
I was brought on
to bring him to some state,
it might've been Chicago or
Wisconsin or something like that
and we started travelling and then we
just hang out, our families got along.
They get along really well, we started doing
things together with my children, his children.
We just bonded.
Yeah.
I don't know how we became so close
but we're here, we enjoy it.
It was your
homosexual proclivities but...
One time I didn't have a shirt on,
it wasn't my fault.
"I'm a great admirer
and fan of yours.
I love your performances in National
Lampoon Vacation and Community.
Thank you for being
one of my biggest role models."
"My fiance and I would be ecstatic
if you attended our wedding!"
OK...
Here's one from 'Spud'.
Spud Toomer.
Boy...
"I sincerely appreciate you taking
the time to read my letter,
I truly enjoy
being part of your career
and admire everything
you accomplished."
He wants you to sign these.
Should I write 'to Spud Toomer'?
Yeah.
"Wonderful prose!"
Wonderful prose!
I was doing the fan mail
and I opened it up
and it says,
"Chevy, just wanna wish you
a happy 80th birthday.
Miss you so much.
Love to see you soon."
And then it said,
"Bill Clinton. Love ya."
And I was like, "Holy cow, man!
You just got a birthday card
from Bill Clinton!" Yeah!
You know, I really regard Bill
as one of our greatest presidents.
Really bright, intelligent guy.
Not terribly humorous.
"Hello, Chevy, how are you?
Thanks for calling.
Hillary's on my head right now.
She's sitting on my head.
She's stark naked.
I'll call you later."
This is the way I am at my age!
Just a child!
Yep!
An angry child!
Hello...
You... What are you doing here?
Two years after a premiere of a
show where no one knows him...
Now co-starring with Goldie Hawn.
I didn't really know him.
I knew he was funny.
Excuse me...
And then I went up to the office
to meet him
and I opened the door
and there comes this 6'4 guy.
He's handsome.
He's got presence.
I mean, aside from being funny,
but I mean
he really was kind of adorable!
And I was wearing sort of a purse,
it was crocheted
but it was shapeless
but it did look like
an udder of a cow.
He literally took his hand
and lifted it on my purse
and he said, "Cough!"
That's a funny group
for Turk to belong to.
Hey, I play detective,
you play lady in distress.
Hey, wait a minute,
it's my ass they're after!
I'm sorry... You're right.
It is your ass they're after
and it's my job to see it
that I get there first!
I could honestly go on about
how amazing a chemistry we had.
We really were aligned
in our timing
and we could feel each other.
Chevy has a great starting vehicle.
It's not that
things are easy for him,
but that, who Chevy is,
in his gumption and confidence,
it plays well out in Hollywood.
He's off and running.
I was a single parent.
I had two children,
Katie and Oliver.
We went out together.
We were both presenting something
at an event
and then we came back together
and Oliver, he had fallen asleep
in front of the television set,
and he went over to him...
And he picked him up
and he carried him to bed.
And he came down the stairs
and he looked at me, he said,
"Go up, he's waiting for you."
And I went upstairs
and I sat with Oliver for a while
and then I came downstairs.
And he was playing the piano,
softly...
And he looked up at me
and he said...
"I can't believe
you're doing all this alone."
He cared.
And that's the other part
of the wild man.
The man who fell over everything.
The guy who had faux pas.
The really funny, wacky, crazy guy.
Also has a deep heart...
Hollywood Nights
Chevy Chase, one of the most successful
alumni of Saturday Night Live,
is back up on the big screen.
This your place, Carl?
Yeah, what do you think?
It's really... It's really awful!
Oh, sit down, come on!
No, I don't wanna
stick to anything in here!
Caddyshack is probably
the biggest showcase
for all the things
that are Chevy Chase.
He's sexy, he's debonair,
he's cool, he's funny...
It's all there!
Ty, what'd you shoot today?
Oh, I don't keep score, judge!
Oh, well, how do you measure
yourself with other golfers?
By height!
As a kid, I studied him.
He would throw away the gold
and push the silver, right?
Like, he would say
something that is like that's funny
and then under the breath
quickly throw away something,
THAT'S the A-plus joke!
I'm gonna end up workin' in
a lumber yard the rest of my life.
What's wrong with lumber?
I own two lumber yards!
Notice you don't spent too much time there.
Not sure where they are.
Caddyshack is one of the greatest
comedies ever made, bar none
and you can't do it without him.
And those Hollywood nights
In those Hollywood Hills
She was lookin' so right
In her diamonds and frills
Oh, those big city nights
He was cerebral, he was funny
and he was handsome too!
Who's the mooseiest moose we know?
Marty Moose!
Marty Moose! Marty Moose!
Marty Moose!
Hyuck! That's me!
The National Lampoon's Vacation
came out.
My parents were like,
"Oh, my God, this happened!"
Like, "This happened to us!"
Sorry, folks,
we're closed for two weeks
to clean and repair
America's favourite family fun park!
Sorry!
Hyuck, hyuck, hyuck!
I think dads everywhere
understood Clark Griswold.
At first,
I didn't wanna take this vacation...
And now I'm glad I did.
It's given me a chance to spend
a lot more time with you and...
Audrey.
Audrey, yeah.
National Lampoon's Vacation
with Chevy Chase
took in $49.4 million
at the box office.
Chevy had massive,
massive movie star hits.
Ah-ah-ah-ah, new car, I'll take it!
Waitress!
He's got it all,
ladies and gentlemen, Chevy Chase!
Here is Chevy Chase!
He gave me a Cartier clock
and on the back of it
it was engraved...
"Keep getting me the six million!"
Chevy Chase!
May I help you, doctor?
Oh, it's me, Dr Rosenpenis.
I'm just here to check out...
Doctor who?
..the family's file.
Dr Rosen-Rosen, I'm here to...
Could you give that name again?
It's Dr Rosen.
I wanna...
Doctor who?
Doctor Rosen,
where's the record room?
In my early days,
if you watch Van Wilder,
I'm just doing
a Chevy Chase impression!
Where am I?
You're in the records room.
Can I get you something?
Uh, yeah, do you have
The Beatles' White Album?
I've seen Fletch, I don't know,
75 times?
Oh, I just got out of the shower!
Yeah...
Can I borrow your towel for a sec?
My car just hit a water buffalo!
For me, the height
of Chevy's filmmaking
was National Lampoon
Christmas Vacation!
I just can't get enough
of that movie.
There are plenty of shopping
days left until adulteries...
Adulthood...
Which is to say Christmas!
Chevy made movies that
you wanna see over and over again.
What is your objective?
My objective?
Well, I object to
taking a girl out, you know,
and buying her dinner
and then she won't put out for you!
I'm Lucky Day!
I'm Ned Nederlander!
And I'm Dusty Bottoms
and together we're...
The Three Amigos!
Hollywood nights!
The thing about fame is that
it doesn't really change you,
it's that
everything around you changes!
If you were at Yankee Stadium
with Chevy,
everyone at Yankee Stadium
would know he was there!
Good evening and welcome to
the 59th Annual Academy Awards Show.
My name is Chevy Chase,
I feel privileged
to be your host this evening.
I'm really a replacement...
I'm sorry to have to tell you that Jim
and Tammy Baker couldn't make it tonight!
There's nothing like when Chevy
Chase is coming into a restaurant.
I've never seen...
You know, wow,
the people's heads snap around!
Chevy is a bona fide movie star!
Those Hollywood nights
Above all the lights
Hollywood nights...
I met Chevy when I was 23.
So, I was two years
out of college.
It was my second job...
Working on a Chevy Chase movie.
The last thing I wanted
was to fall in love...
Yeah.
Um...
Chevy's calling!
Take it!
Hi, honey!
Hi, don't forget to mention
how much we make love everyday!
OK, I'm on camera
so they might have captured that!
Three times on weekends!
Goodbye!
OK! Love you, honey!
I was working on a movie
called Under the Rainbow.
Jayni was
the production coordinator in it.
My trailer was pulled right up
near to where
the production unit was
and I could hear her voice
and I'd think,
"What a beautiful voice."
But I never looked
to see who it was.
Finally, I sort of did this,
you know,
where you look in the door...
And I saw her and she was gorgeous.
We were shooting
at Union Station, Downtown LA.
It was the end of the day
and he came up and said,
"Would you go with me
to the premiere of my movie tonight?
Goldie is in Paris
and Jessica Lange..."
Or some other actress...
"Has the flu."
And I looked up, I said,
"Not if I'm third choice!"
And he looked very crestfallen.
Oh...
Wasn't my job to give him
his call time
but I offered to call him with it.
And he came on
all out of breath and I said,
"Do you still want me
to come with you tonight?"
And he said, "Really?"
We went and that was the beginning
of my falling in love with him.
Thanks for droppin' by
I never thought to ask you why!
Through one machination or another,
I managed to get her on my side.
We had a very small wedding
in the backyard.
Including the caterers, 40 people.
She's the great love of my life.
She's only three feet tall...
No!
We were married
and it's only a year
since he saw that last tape
and look what's happened...
This is Cydney!
It's Cydney!
The way he took care of me
when I was pregnant
and at all the birthings
of the girls
and seeing him as a daddy
and how happy it made him...
Hi, peewees!
Hi, Dad!
They go through
their ups and downs.
I mean, it's not perfect
but they really hold on
to one another
and they really love each other.
She's beautiful and smart as a whip!
I don't have much to say about her
that isn't good.
No, I know, but it's just nice
after hearing about Jacqueline
and what have you...
Oh, I'm sorry! Your mistake?
That you found someone
and that you're...
You know,
you have three beautiful daughters.
Yeah, no, I don't think a lot of
people have the happiness I have.
Marriages are breaking up,
kids do bad things,
all that stuff that is family stuff,
it's tough.
Not just in America,
but even worse in, let's say,
Russia
because...
It must be nice
to be a Russian family, huh?
Pass the fork!
Thank you.
Come on.
Oh, thanks.
Fan of yours!
Oh, a chair!
Hi! Hello!
What's his name?
That's Rubet!
She will be 11 in July.
Oh, cool.
Yeah.
I have a couple of 17-year-olds...
Really?
And, uh, a 23-year-old.
We have everything!
Cats, dogs... We have a pelican!
Really?
No!
Do I have a picture of my dog?
Yeah!
That's my granddaughter.
Cute.
She's only seven months.
Seven months, wow.
She speaks French.
Really?
No!
I just keep lyin' to you!
I keep buyin' it!
Well, I'll have a steak!
No, I'm kidding!
We came in to get some flowers.
They're for my wife.
I have you on file, so if you wanna know,
like, what you got last time...
Oh, yeah, yeah! Let's look!
Yeah, let me take a look.
Oh...
Beautiful!
They're actually tulips.
They're not peonies. These are tulips.
They look like peonies.
Yeah, those are tulips.
That's your licence.
What?
Yeah, I want you
to drive my car over here.
Oh, yeah?
What did I just give you
my licence for?
This is what I meant!
Perfect, thank you!
These are for Jayni, my wife!
I love her!
If she doesn't love 'em,
you tell me,
but I guarantee she'll love 'em.
Do you want me to sign something?
No, you're good.
What do you mean?
I don't know what they cost! They're 400.
Four hundred dollars?
Yeah!
What?!
For a little thing of flowers?!
That's a big thing!
I can give you a little thing!
I bet you can!
Yeah!
OK, never mind...
Oh, they really are pretty.
Yeah, these are
particularly special.
We don't have these in regularly,
you can't always get those.
Peonies?
No, those are actually tulips!
I know, I know, I was kidding you!
By the way, that's why I drive!
Yeah!
For people like you! Thank you!
We spent a lot of time together
in the late '70s
and early '80s.
He was uniquely funny
and pretty crazy!
When we were in Hawaii,
he had somebody
ship in many ounces of coke
in a special shaving cream can
which you could twist
in a certain way
and get to the coke.
Every so often
we'd have some cocaine
flown in from the...
From the mainland!
"Mail's here!"
Anyway...
When I would visit Chevy in LA,
I remember going to one restaurant
and it was a circular table
and I think there were about...
Maybe six to eight of us
around the table
and the only person
I knew was Chevy
but in the centre of the table
there was, like, a lazy Susan...
It was out of a pyramid...
That pyramid was cocaine!
Oh, boy!
Nobody knows...
Modern Problems,
there's such a thin line between what's
going on in the movie and in his life!
YESSS!
I LIKE IT!
The night before we were starting
to shoot Modern Problems,
Chevy just calls up, he's like, "I'm not
doing the movie! You have to fix the script!"
Alan Greisman, Ken Shapiro and I
go up to Chevy's house.
We start to go over
the script page by page
and Chevy pours coke on the table
and starts sniffing it!
'Cause there you're supposed to
be having a rational discussion
about a movie
that you're gonna do
and he's just snorting coke
like there's no tomorrow!
We're sitting there kind of...
Not really wanting some
but maybe, you know...
But he's not offering us any, OK?
So, we're in that space, OK...
Who does cocaine alone
in front of other people?
So, by the time we're three-quarters
of the way through the critique,
he says, "You know what...
I disagree with myself!"
So, rationality
was not high on the agenda!
Chevy had a weird relationship
with the director Ken Shapiro.
Kenny wanted me to play
a dream that I was a plane,
landing.
He put landing lights on my arms.
They flipped the switch
and he was uh-uh-uh-uh-uh...
And they thought he was joking
so they let it go longer
than they coulda, shoulda...
All of a sudden,
he, like, passes out.
So, the EMTs come, OK?
And they do these questions,
"How many fingers am I holding up?
Do you know what day it is?
What's your name?"
And he goes,
"Don't you know who I am?"
I mean, and my memory
of that is that...
Oh, come now!
I'm not saying
he didn't feel something
but he certainly didn't get electrocuted
or a full dose of something!
Chevy, you don't want
to work with him
because he can be so unpleasant
and so gratuitously mean.
And I don't think
he knows that he is.
I think it's just...
It's an instinct.
Sometimes, you know,
he was his own worst enemy.
He would do things
that were emotional
or out off insecurity
that he shouldn't have done.
Would you ever try to talk to him
about it?
Yeah, I was very open with him
about it.
And, um, to his credit
he would listen.
Whether he would take the advice
or not remained to be seen.
On the surface,
Chevy looks like the guy
that everything went perfect for.
It wasn't really the case, you know?
There was...
There was some darkness.
Did anyone tell you
about the Terry Sweeney incident?
I was there for it, yeah.
It's Saturday Night Live...
..with host Chevy Chase!
When Chevy came back to host,
I don't think anyone is prepared
for the Chevy that shows up.
I always felt like...
It was beneath him to do this.
I've gotten to know
the cast very well,
it's a great new cast,
I hope you saw last week's show.
If you didn't,
this week you meet them.
They're a wonderful group
of 28 kids...
Uh...
That's not true,
there are only about seven.
He was really tough on the furniture
that week,
particularly Terry Sweeney,
who was the first
openly gay cast member of SNL.
Uh, President Kennedy?
Very good job!
He had this wonderfully
warm icebreaker with Terry Sweeney,
which was, "You're gay, right?"
And Terry said, "Yes, what
would you like me to do for you?"
And Chevy said,
"You can start by licking my balls!"
And then, of course,
it went downhill from there.
I think Chevy was just being Chevy.
He would say things
that were funny
but he assumed that you were comedy
people and you could speak that way.
You know,
we would say terrible things
because
that's what would make us laugh.
It wasn't...
We didn't tell anecdotes, you know?
You said to Terry Sweeney,
"Oh, you're the gay guy!
Why don't we do something
where we say you have AIDS
and then every week we weigh you!"
That's the worst!
Ron, how are you?
Uh, Nancy!
Just terrific, Jerry!
How's Betty?
Oh, she's fine!
Terry Sweeney, I mean,
he was very funny,
this guy...
I don't think
he's alive anymore, Terry Sweeney.
I hope he isn't 'cause I don't want
you talking to him about this!
He's alive!
Is he?
Yeah, and I think...
How do you know?
'Cause I looked him up on Google!
I mean, is he alive?
He's alive!
He's alive!
Oh! He's aliveeeee!
The gay guy!
Oh, God...
No, um, I think...
I think... And this is...
But the idea of weighing him,
come on, that's...
That's clearly me...!
No, yeah,
I think his recollection is different!
Oh, what's his...
He was very hurt by...
Oh!
Yeah, so...
Well, when did you talk to him?
I haven't talked to him!
Then how do you know he was hurt?
I've heard it from other people!
Other people have told you that I hurt
his feelings? It's like in books!
I have to be going now!
I'll leave you two leaders alone
to talk.
I'm gonna take Lucky for a walk.
I think you hurt his feelings and...
What book is this?
Should I read this?
Yeah, read it out!
Come over here so he can hear you.
Oh, this is great, thanks...
This'll make my day!
"Chevy turned to me and he said,
'Oh, you're the gay guy, right?'
And he said, 'I've got
an idea for a sketch for you.
How about we say you have AIDS
and we weigh you every week.'
It was out of place so then
he ended up having to apologise
and actually come into my office.
He was really furious
he had to apologise to me.
He was just beside himself
and it was just awful."
None of that's true.
I would remember that.
You would?
Yeah!
That... That I was angry
that I had to apologise to him?
Good God, Chevy,
what's wrong with you?
I mean, of course I...
That's just not true!
My memory is that he's lying
is my memory!
He's not telling the truth!
That isn't me. That's not how I am.
And if I am that way,
my life has changed
'cause I have to live with that now
for the rest of my fuckin' life
'cause you guys got a book out
and read it to me!
I'd like to thank...
Goodnight!
Within the next week
it was all over the place.
And you know,
people who left that week saying,
"I never wanna see the guy again."
Look, there are certain people who've
got reputations that you don't want.
Um...
Chevy...
The old Chevy could make you laugh
putting you down
and there was
a little bit of a wink there
so you were in on the joke...
But now it just comes off as mean.
It's kind of
the elephant in the room.
Oh, I'm sorry, go ahead.
The elephant in the room, yeah.
That there are two camps.
There are the people
who love you
and the people who don't like you.
OK, I don't know what to say about the
people who don't like me except fuck 'em!
What can you say, actually,
about something like that?
I can't say
they're misunderstanding me
because maybe they're not
by their standard.
Uh, I just prefer to be liked...
Not disliked.
Like all of us!
Our doctor,
the ear, nose and throat guy,
called me
and asked me to come in
and he needed to talk to me
and he explained to me
that Chevy was addicted to cocaine.
Cocaine one-upped him.
He was no longer in control
and for a guy
who loves being in control
I think it was a very, very
dark, dangerous journey.
He's had many times
where he was doing just fine
and then something happens
and that's...
You know,
it's a disease of relapse
and, you know,
it's never a wonder...
..that an addict uses!
It's a miracle
if an addict doesn't!
So, we did an intervention.
He said, "I know I need to stop.
And I know I need help."
Well, comedian Chevy Chase
will be off the job for a while.
A spokesman says that the reason
is a drug problem.
The first time I ever heard of
the Betty Ford Clinic
was in relation
to Chevy Chase going there
and my mother having to be like,
"Well, that's where rich people go
when they've had too much to drink."
He went to Betty Ford
but after a week he called me
and begged me to come pick him up.
Doctors released
comedian Chevy Chase
from the Betty Ford Drug Rehabilitation
Centre over the weekend.
According to a spokeswoman,
his system is cleaned of drugs.
You know, the actual addiction
or the...
The things he's gone through,
I've come to see it as an illness.
The fact that he has overcome that,
that's another thing he's overcome.
There's good news and bad news
because if you go through rehab
and you're successful
then you're moving on
with a healthier life.
The problem is that
all the crutches,
all the vehicles that you used
to get through certain situations,
they're all gone.
And it turns out that
that inner core, that raw nature
can be incredibly mean!
He made these huge movies,
he was one
of the biggest stars going...
And then he made a couple of ones
that weren't...
Didn't do that great.
Because he was who he is,
even on the way to the top
he was not a good guy.
But I can't imagine how he was
on the way to the bottom.
I mean, basically, I'll just yell
and I'll just yell,
"Hey, you guys, hey!"
Keep it goin'.
Yeah.
Speed, mark!
And light!
Hey, help!
Up here!
Now over to number two!
Help!
Bang away!
Chevy Chase, I wanted to quit
the business after working with him!
Really? What was the movie?
Memoirs of an Invisible Man.
Um, it...
He was a producer on this thing!
So, you're directing,
and he's, like,
got this attitude?
Oh, yeah, it... It was bad!
Was it one of those things where they had to
shut things down? No, no, it was not that way.
I took it all in
and just internalised it.
But that was my...
Uh, that was my...
Worst... Worst!
It's a great movie,
I'm very happy with it.
You play an invisible man.
I play the invisible man.
I sincerely think that this is by far
and away the best picture I've made,
which is,
according to some critics,
the equivalent of a mutt saying,
"I just had a beautiful dump!"
"Memoirs of an Invisible Man
is a mediocre movie
that can't make up its mind
what it wants to be.
Chase is fine
when the going gets funny.
Unfortunately, when he's called
upon to act he turns amateurish."
I'm gonna say something
that I probably shouldn't
but I never got the sense Chevy
was as serious about his career
as his career was serious.
We had clients that were so focused
on building and what role went next
and, um...
He didn't think that way.
I don't think he took himself
as seriously as he was taken.
How did the talk show come about?
You know, it's funny,
I knew you'd ask me this question.
I hated the idea.
Bruce Bodner was Chevy's lawyer
morphed into his manager.
Bruce was very influential
on his life.
He really had Chevy's ear.
Thought it was a good idea,
those of us around him didn't.
There's a lot to be done
as Chevy Chase starts his quest
for a chunk of the late-night
talk show audience!
The pressure is, can I do it?
And the anticipation is,
can I do it?
You did a talk show!
What was that like?
Short!
Thanks for asking!
I never took anybody's advice
about how to do a talk show.
I didn't...
I can do it, I kept thinking!
He came to me and said,
"Do you wanna work on it?"
Um, and I was like, yeah!
If there's anything I could change
it's that period of time...
That kind of took us to
Memoirs of an Invisible Man
and the talk show.
The closer we got to the airdate,
the more we started to feel like
this ship is not upright!
So, I have a pain in my...
My chest right in here
and some numbness
going down my arm.
Otherwise, I'm kind of nervous!
I don't think
it was well thought-through.
They just had this idea,
"Oh, he's funny, he's a big star!
We'll put him on TV and it'll work!"
And now...
He's still not ready for prime time!
Chevy Chase!
It wasn't Chevy's forte...
Chevy was not a guy
who could do stand-up comedy!
President Clinton is appearing
on Nightline tonight
to discuss
his healthcare plan further.
If you're watching him...
Or excuse me if you're watching me
instead of him, I'm flattered
but I think
maybe you should see a doctor
because that's just a sign
of how really sick you are!
I think the show needed
a different kind of produce,
the person they got had a long
history of television producing
but it was really
old-time TV comedy.
Uh, I feel like a hundred dollars!
You know, I don't want...
I want you out!
I remember being on set and...
It felt like
I wanted him to relax!
He felt nervous to me!
It was hideous!
I just didn't really have a sense
of what you do on a talk show.
It's basically a true story
and it...
It's based on sort of the dilemma
of a kid
who's brought up with a father
who really cares about him
but he's also very close
to a member of kind of the mob,
I mean...
Roll the clip!
That's a hard thing to do
every night for an hour!
It's almost impossible,
if you wanna know the truth!
You have to know something
about everything.
You have to be well-read.
You have to understand
current events.
You have to know
who your guest is
and there are
five of them a night.
I don't know how people
like Letterman and others do it.
I... It's beyond me.
You can say it's interesting to have
different people with different...
Yeah, yeah, right.
We're all the same, pretty much.
It's not that interesting.
The reviews
were universally terrible
and Chevy literally would come
into the writers' room and say,
"You guys are doing a great job!
It is not your fault,
it's my fault!"
There was a 50th birthday party
for Chevy
with a lot of big stars.
It was a huge disappointment
when we learned
at the end of the party
that the show had been pulled
by Fox.
It was my job to tell him
the show was cancelled and I did it.
I remember Mike Ovitz saying...
"Do you wanna do
another couple of weeks or what?"
I said, "A couple of weeks?"
"Yeah, I think we're finished!"
You know, and that was it...
It was kind of a weird environment
after his talk show.
I know my dad has been depressed.
I knew that at a young age.
And that was sort of hard for me
because, you know...
I would go in and, like,
tug on his shirt
and he'd say, like,
"Not now, honey."
Huh?
Where are we? What's the date?
April 19th 1994.
Four Seasons Hotel, Washington, DC.
I'm your host
and I'd be happy to take your order.
One thing that was interesting
about our household
is that my parents were pretty open with
some of the things going on that were deeper,
depending on our ages.
My parents were communicating enough to
say there's something called depression
and it is hard
for people to get out of bed.
Hi!
Why are you doing this?
He would get in bed
and not get out.
I didn't understand why...
My father and mother,
they divorced
when I was around four
and not many years later
he married again
and so did my mother.
John Cederquist,
he married my mother.
He was a psychoanalyst.
He was not like my father.
Humourless.
Humourless...
He was the father figure,
as our stepfather,
for most of the time growing up.
My father had a flash anger
and he could lash out
with a single blow
and no talk before or after.
He did not take to anything
that he perceived as insolence.
Chevy was insolent.
The first time we stayed together,
the first time I went to wake him up
he shuddered...
And he explained,
"Well, my mother would wake me up
slapping me."
From the time he was a little guy,
wham!
Our mother was a bag of cats.
Certainly on the schizoid spectrum.
I felt like, uh,
this was an out-of-control woman
who I look back on and I say,
"I feel sorry for her."
She had her own issues. Bad ones.
But she was physically abusive
to me.
Oftentimes,
in abusive households,
there's one child
who's the target of the abuse.
And unfortunately, he...
He was that.
I would hear stories from Chevy about some of
the terrible things that would happen to him
as a young man.
Things like being locked
in the closet.
There was a cellar
and he was sent down there
because of
really messing up at school.
My marks stank
but they stank because whereas others
would concentrate on their homework
I didn't have a chance at that.
I was always worried
about one thing or another
that had to do with my own health.
Ned and I were eating breakfast
and Cederquist came down and started
slapping me across the back of the head.
And I stood up and made it clear
I didn't think was a time
for corporal punishment...
And John Cederquist sat down
and I sat down.
I knew at that time
that Ned was there for me.
Uh, that was a big moment for us.
So, at what point...
Or was there a point where you walked
away from your mother and stepfather
and never saw them again?
Sorry?
It shaped him.
He used comedy, he used humour
as a way to, um...
You know,
mask what was going on inside.
And that's continued.
It continues to this day.
I mean, he will joke around
from morning to night
and you won't know
what's going on.
That's his instinct, is...
"I wanna bring humour
to this situation!"
'Cause that's how he always
dealt with the problems in his life.
Chevy,
do you have your lighter close-by?
I have my lighter very close-by!
Are you ready?
I'm ready
'cause I wanna put all these away!
Oh, wait, that's chewing gum!
Do you know about his past?
Do you know that he was abused
as a child?
Um, I don't know
that he was abused as a child
but I am sort of sad to say
that I would have guessed that...
Because of, you know...
Um, what he's doing
is a coping mechanism.
No problem...
Funny people generally have a lot
of sad things in their background.
A lot of tragedy.
That's where the comedy comes from.
What it really boils down to is being
able to behave in a very natural way
in a very unnatural environment.
And I think, often, the...
That... That skill is honed...
Um, in a... In an unhappy home.
Uh-oh, I've got it...!
We've lost a huge evergreen
over here.
Huge tree.
What do you think of this?
I went through, like,
six or seven years of real depression.
I just couldn't quite figure out
what it was...
When you're in it, uh,
you're just not feelin' too good.
I found that,
the better I got on the piano,
the more he would come downstairs
so I played my tuchis off!
He loved it
and he was inspired by it
and inspired me
and loved hearing it
and would love to show me stuff!
It brought him out of the bedroom!
This is our house now!
Well, it's most of it!
Moving us out of LA
was my way of making sure that
we were living more in reality.
That was the best thing, I think,
for all of us.
To get out of that environment.
I needed to get him here.
This was... He grew up here!
I've always had Jayni.
It's pretty hard to be depressed
too long with a happy woman.
Chevy!
Where's your chess set?
Right back there, buddy.
You wanna play now?
Or just this?
Just that first,
we'll do the chess after.
Here...
That's the face right there!
How's this?
Look at that face!
No!
All right, ready?
All right, try again!
Why are you makin'
that same face?!
What?
It looks like
you're takin' a shit!
It looks like I'm takin' a shit?
Yeah, look at it!
Sorry, everybody!
My apologies!
OK, from now on let's be serious!
Seriously!
He likes to tease.
Remember the 12-year-old boy that pulls
the girl's hair? Right? That's him!
"All the best!"
We were at a restaurant
and he seemed to be
talking to his veal chop...
He had one finger, he says,
"Come on!"
He would say,
"Come on, come on, come on!"
And then with his other hand
he picked it up, fwah,
"There, that's good!"
If I were you,
I wouldn't do that!
Chevy will do...
If you're sitting at a table
he'll be sitting there
and then he'll start to do this...
He does this, where...
He bounces along
and you see this figure bounce
and it's just...
Always buckles me over when he...
When he does that!
Huge fan, Mr Chase, huge fan!
Thank you! I appreciate that!
Thank you!
Would you like a signed picture?
Do you have one available?
I might... I might have one!
We were at
the AFI Tribute to Gregory Peck.
Way, way in the corner,
Mary Hart
was interviewing someone live
and Chevy said,
"I wonder if I can hit her
with this roll."
And he whipped it
as far as he could
and it hit her right in the head in the middle
of a thing and he had to sit down like a kid!
I was at an event
and this young caterer came up
with a tray full of, like,
chocolate mousse,
shots of chocolate mousse.
"Would you guys like
some chocolate mousse?"
Chevy looked at it, he stuck his
finger in one, took it out and went...
"No, thank you!"
So, I'm up 100 to, uh...
Twelve?
Yes!
We're not rolling, are we rolling?
Yes!
This whole time?
What was the question?
So, Community...
What?
OK, I did Community,
Jayni says I was great in it!
What is community college?
Well, you've heard
all kinds of things...
You've heard it's loser college
or old people...
I sort of thought
I was in retirement
a little bit back with my wife
and the kids
back at the farm in New York
but, you know...
When I saw the...
The pilot script, I said,
"Oh, I gotta play that guy!"
My dad got this pilot.
He said yes to it
because he loved the writing!
Thought Dan Harmon
was quite a genius!
I was here in LA, acting,
pretty much just living on couches.
My mom said,
"Don't really wanna move to LA.
Is there any way you would live
with your father?
I'll give you a place to stay."
And I was like,
"Oh, my God, yes! I'll do it!"
I became a little LA.
I got some sage...
Wanted to empty the house of...
Whatever the heck was there.
The next morning,
I found a note in the bag
with the sage.
It just said,
"Smoked it, didn't like it.
Love you, Dad."
And I'm thinking, "Did he?"
I was a Chevy Chase fan
from Saturday Night Live.
The beginning.
He's a classical sketch performer.
I was hired to do Community
and I had heard, you know,
that he could be challenging...
Would you stop tuning that guitar?
You are 105 years old!
EXCUSE ME...
But it's springtime and I thought
I might woo a few chicks!
On the first day
I was working with Chevy,
he's throwing a big pause
in the middle of this sentence
that cannot have a pause...
And I'm like, "Can we
do it again without that pause?"
And he's puttin' the pause in
and puttin' the pause it
and he keeps puttin' the pause in
and I'm like,
"If you pull that pause out
I think it's gonna be funnier!"
And he goes, "Oh, I see...
Are YOU telling ME
how to do comedy?"
And I said, "I am...
In this case, I am.
And it kills me, but yes, I am."
And he goes, "Fine, fuck it!"
And so, he did it without the pause
and he goes,
"You're right, that was better!"
He and I would argue about
how he was delivering a line
and it would get heated
and the next day he'd come in
and be rubbing my belly
and telling me
Richard Pryor stories!
I loved it!
Like, I mean, you know...
I complimented him
on the movie Foul Play
and he goes, "It's a terrible film!"
I'm like,
"No, Chevy, it's a great film!"
And he goes, "You don't know
what the fuck you're talkin' about!"
"I do know
what the fuck I'm talkin' about!"
"You wanna see a good movie?
Rosemary's Baby!"
And I'm like,
"OK, that's also a good movie!"
It seems...
Bleugh!
It seems...
Thought it was my line, I'm sorry!
There was a little bit of negativity
around Chevy
and the rest of the cast
and so there was a desire
to shoot him out every day...
And so,
the very first shots of the day,
I would get him to say
all his lines
and we would argue
and then, uh...
And I'm like, "All right, Chevy,
we're done." And he would leave.
Once he left, everyone's like,
"Hey!"
Troy, get up here
and double-bounce me!
That's not how we do things here!
Get up here and double-bounce me or
I'll tell everybody about this place!
Harmon then was like...
Listening to his cast and he goes,
"Don't worry,
I broke Pierce's legs for you!"
Father...
MY LEGS! ARGH!
Two casts and a wheelchair.
So, you just stick him
in one place
and just shoot him out
for the whole episode.
He's just fuckin' in that chair!
For the first time,
it was very clear to him
that he was the old fart.
His castmates,
they were so much younger
and they were just living
a very different life.
Here's the thing,
the first script back,
which Chevy loves, right?
What's that? Have you seen it?
I have not seen it!
This is the respect I didn't get!
It's in his email!
Which is in New York!
His email's in New York!
They were cracking up because
they'd asked him, "Do you do email?
Do you have email?"
And he said, "Oh, yeah...
But that's in New York!"
The cast, by the way, minus Chevy,
is so nice!
He said you're nice! You're nice!
But that's fine...
Chevy was unprotected.
And any time I spoke to anyone
no one really did anything.
That was when I realised that I was
getting a six pack of organic red wine
and after about four days
it was gone.
I pointed it out to Chevy
probably five different times
and he would roll it back
and then he didn't like
me pointing it out to him.
Because the...
The beast of addiction
starts taking over.
He was not an alcoholic
all those years
but alcoholism
is a whole different level.
It really takes over.
And that was
hard for him to stop.
Chevy was functional.
I didn't realise it right away.
Caley did.
She finally said,
"Mom, I think he's drinking on set!"
Look at awesome Jeffrey Winger!
Too awesome for old Pierce
with your hip shirts and your...
Your gelled hair!
It was out in the open that Chevy Chase
was a little difficult on Community.
And I'm being nice...
People were talking about it,
enough that Dan did that thing
at the wrap party.
My dad was super-excited to bring
me and my mom to the wrap party.
We walk in,
Dan had had some drinks...
He starts railing on Chevy
on the microphone.
He had gotten
the whole cast and crew to yell,
"Fuck you, Chevy!
Fuck you, Chevy!"
I'm there, he's showing his daughter
'this is the show I did'
and we walk into 'fuck you, Chevy'.
That's rough and mean...
I don't get talked to like that
by anybody,
certainly not in front of
my wife and daughter,
you, alcoholic fat!
You're not funny. You're OK..."
He was pissed and left an angry, pissed
but also kinda funny voicemail to Dan.
"You can suck my..."
Dan was going
through a time as well
and he ended up
putting my dad's voicemail public.
So, they went back and forth,
I don't know...
There was like
this little mini-war with them.
Dan was fired from the show.
They made up and then my dad said,
"I won't come back without Dan!"
It was crazy!
We have to teach Jeffrey
how to fight.
I know a few moves.
Troy, I assume
you're handy with a switchblade.
Abed,
you get back to the family tent,
try to find a chicken
for Jeff to chase.
As the seasons went on,
Chevy had a lot...
A lot of concerns with his role
and how they were portraying him.
A little angry, a little mean.
They were writing his character
more and more bigoted.
And he was getting upset about it.
I was there directing
the night Chevy Chase got fired
from Community.
And that's why Pierce should
host the reception!
He speaks their language!
Finally,
somebody's making some sense!
I've got a Blackface Senor Wences
bit I've been workshopping.
Perfect!
Harmon write this...
A Blackface hand puppet routine.
What you talkin' about, honky?
Character is a little tone-deaf
on this thing!
I haven't introduced you
to my Asian wife yet!
Uh-oh!
Now, had it been
Chevy in his heyday,
he would have been
totally fine, right?
He said something to Yvette...
I know that there was a history
between those two around race
and she got up
and stormed out of there...
Chevy storms off.
So, the producer is like,
we need Yvette in this scene, right?
I'm like, "Yeah!
She's in the next scene!"
"She won't come out
unless Chevy apologises to her!"
I'm like, "Oh...!"
He's like...
He comes back...
Comes back on the set
and he's like...
He goes, "Hey, man...
I didn't say anything!"
And I'm like, "No, I know, I know!"
He goes, "Me and Richard Pryor...
I used to call Richard Pryor
the N word!
He used to call me the honky!
And we loved each other!"
And I'm like,
"I know, man! I love that bit!"
I said, "But you know...
Can we just have a little apology?"
He goes, "For what?"
And I'm like... I was just...
"I don't know, like, we're just...
Can we just make the goddamn show?
Can we make the goddamn show?"
Somebody has leaked that there was a
racial incident to The Hollywood Reporter
at 2:00 in the fuckin' morning.
There were 50, 75 extras there,
so, you're like,
"Oh, my God, this is so...
This shouldn't have happened!"
Right?
And he comes storming onto the set
and he goes,
"Who fucked me over?!"
And I'm like...
And he goes,
"One of you motherfuckers said to The
Hollywood Reporter my career is ruined!
I'm ruined!"
Like that... It's a full meltdown!
"Fuck all of you!"
And I'm like...
"All right, let's shoot the scene!"
Look, either he leaves the group
or I do!
You just dug your own grave!
He never ended up coming back
after that.
Hey... What's up?
They kicked me out of the group!
Chevy Chase
reportedly used the N word
after complaining about some of the
lines the show Community had given him.
Some of the lines made him so upset
that he said that pretty soon they would
have him call the black characters the N word
but he actually said the N word.
When you read that stuff,
'Chevy's been a jerk',
are those unfounded cheap shots?
I don't give a crap.
I am who I am.
And I like who I am. I don't care.
And it's part of me
that I don't care.
I would say 90% of my experience
with journalism around my dad
is negative.
This is like the core of it...
Yeah, of course.
You want the truth, the reality.
I want the truth
but it's kind of like...
What adds to the complication,
he doesn't remember certain things.
Oh, well, I mean,
he's 80-something
and has basically
come back from the dead, so...
Tell me about that, like...
Oh, my God! He had heart failure!
Have they talked about that at all?
Urgh...
It's so hard to talk about!
Um...
Something was wrong
and he couldn't explain to me
what was wrong,
so, go to the ER...
His heart stops.
During those years he was drinking,
he got cardiomyopathy,
when the heart muscles get weaker
and they can't pump
as much blood out with each beat.
They decided
to put him into a coma
for maybe eight days.
That's pretty rough on the body.
It was so scary
when he was in the hospital.
We were all there,
it was during COVID.
The doctor had warned us
we might not get him back,
we don't know how present he'll be.
You know, this...
"Prepare yourselves
for the worst."
He woke up,
all he could do was use his voice,
'ah, ah' and it was
just his waking up...
It was like a new birth.
And the nurse came in, to, like,
switch some stuff up
And she said, "I'm gonna
have to put this in here."
And he said,
"That's what she said!"
When he came out of it,
it took a while
for him to re-orient himself.
So, I feel like his memory gaps
come from that incident.
So, how's that problem
you're having with an erection?
This is the worst...
Queen of diamonds.
Check.
OK, tell you what, who's richer?
And let me just say this...
Yeah?
They have ways now
of keeping you hard!
According to the doctors,
my memory would be shot from it
and that's what's happened here,
so...
You had a lot of
cognitive disability
and we started playing cards.
That's right.
We played a lot of cards
and a lot more cards
and then you started
gettin' your head back together
and then my boys would come play.
Then we went to chess.
Then we went to chess.
That's when I started really winning.
Won every once in a while.
Heart failure is what it is...
I'm fine now.
It's just that
it affects your memory
very, uh...
And the doctors have told me that,
so...
You know,
I have to be reminded of things.
Five, king, seven...
In the early days of SNL,
I would remember trying to tell,
like,
my parents' friends or some...
You know, about this show
that I write for.
They hadn't heard of it
but I would then find myself saying,
"You know, the Chevy Chase show,
the show Chevy Chase is on!"
THAT they knew!
Tonight we are live
at 30 Rockefeller Plaza
in the very place where Saturday
Night Live started 50 years ago!
Comedy icons,
your favourite entertainers
are all here!
Did you think we would be here
50 years later?
Uh, you mean, like, dead or here?
He was there at the moment
Saturday Night Live was born.
It was a really powerful
collaboration
and we both went for that ride.
If it hadn't been for me this show
would've gone on the dumper that year!
No...
That's all you're gonna show now,
right, you devils!
He's very proud of his days at SNL.
Just speaks so highly of the people
he was working with.
Loves Lorne dearly...
He really does.
Would you ever come back?
Of course!
Yeah, I'd love coming back!
They told Chevy up until that day
that there were two bits,
they were going back and forth...
And then all of a sudden,
"No, there's no bit."
There were a couple
of versions of Update
and we went back and forth on that.
There was also a caution
from somebody I don't wanna name
that Chevy, you know,
wasn't as focused.
The night of the 8H show that
everybody watched on Sunday night,
he wasn't in that show.
I don't know
what the dynamics were,
I don't know
why that was decided.
I honestly don't know.
There's 50 years of casts...
Billy Crystal,
no bigger star than Billy...
He didn't say a word that night.
You know,
just too many people to fill.
Live from New York
it's Saturday Night!
He should have opened the show
with 'it's Saturday night'!
That's it...
They didn't even
need to use him more
but...
come on, guys! That was it!
And live from New York
it's Saturday Night!
You gotta think about the people
who grew up watching that show
and watching him.
It was a bit
of a slap in the face.
Well, it was kind of...
Upsetting, actually.
Uh, and this'll probably be
the first time I'm saying it
but I expected that I would've been
on the stage too
with all the other actors.
When Garrett and Laraine
went on the stage there...
I was curious as to why I didn't.
No one asked me to.
Why was I left aside?
Cornelius Crane Chase...
Who we've all come to know
as Connie!
Let's face it, Weekend Update
simply would not exist without him!
So, it would be wrong
to have him listed anywhere
but number four!
Why was Bill Murray there?
Why was I not?
Jane Curtin and...
I don't have an answer for that.
..and Danny Aykroyd.
I did bring it up once...
..in a text to Lorne
and then took it back.
I said,
"OK, I take it back, it's silly."
But it's not that silly...
Uh, it was...
Somebody's made a bad mistake there.
I don't know who it was
but somebody made a mistake.
They should've had me
on that stage.
It hurt.
If you wanna know what it takes to make
a show like this last for 50 years,
it's these people
right around me...
The first cast!
Laraine Newman, Jane Curtin,
Garrett Morris and Chevy Chase!
Afterwards, when I saw him,
everybody was happy
to see each other
and there's Chevy lookin' like
he was lookin' for his place...
And I say, you know, "Chevy...
None of this would be happening
without you.
You don't do Weekend Update
to start this at the beginning,
all of us
are somewhere else tonight."
There is a nip in the air, though.
Can I take something out for you?
All right, Pat...
Hey, buddy.
I'm glad you're here.
I'm glad I'm here too.
Should this be buttoned up here?
Stand up.
Huh?
Let me see.
Where's Jayni?
I don't know... Let go of it.
You said this is good,
I don't really...
Well, try buttonin' it.
OK, I am! What do you mean, try?
I'm buttoning it!
So, every December
is our Super Bowl
and this is
what we prepare for all year.
So, it's OK, then, do you think,
if I go out like this?
We've been going out
on the road November, late November
and all of December
doing these big theatre screenings
of Christmas Vacation
where Chevy and I go out
and do the answer Q&A afterwards.
And that all started happening
because there are so many people
that live and breathe
Christmas Vacation!
You have food on your pants, honey.
A lot of food.
They're gonna see that...
There's breakfast!
Please!
Lunch, dinner...
What are you...
No one's notice
the mustard and eggs on my pants!
What's that?
I'm drying it!
I think I'm gonna enjoy this!
You know Bill?
Mister Chase, nice to meet you.
Hi, Bill.
Thanks for being here.
Thank you very much.
He owns the theatre.
What?
He owns the theatre!
That's great!
I gotta ask you one question...
OK?
When you made Caddyshack...
Can't answer that!
I did it...
Please help me welcome
Mr Chevy Chase!
What?!
Thank you!
Oh, my gosh... Thank you!
You know, when you're makin'
movies you don't get to see this.
You just get to see the camera,
the director
and some nice ass...
No, I'm kidding!
And, uh...
You're my real fans
and I really appreciate this!
Thank you!
Thank you so much!
It's fun...
It's fun because when you make
movies or even television
you don't get the kind of
honest reaction from your fans
as you do there in the theatre.
I'm always moved, I get goose bumps!
Jayni, this question is for you.
How is Chevy similar to Clark?
Oh...
Well, we both look the same!
A lot of the persona
was at being effortless.
It wasn't.
You represent a generation
and another generation grows up,
they look at your stuff,
they worship you
and then you show up in their work.
You can't not remember someone
like him fondly.
Listen, 5:39...
Any encounter with him,
you don't know what's gonna come out next.
It's exciting and dangerous
and really, really fun.
Kate L wanted to know, did you break
your finger while shooting the movie?
If what?
Did you break your finger
while shooting the movie?
I thought you said sphincter!
His legacy really is
how he made people laugh,
how you tickle
that part of your heart
and I don't think
people forget that.
If acting didn't work out,
what would you have wanted to do
for a career?
Well, I've always enjoyed surgery!
Surgery!
Would you work with him again?
Yeah... Yeah, I would!
I'd work with Chevy!
I mean, are you kidding me?
It's Chevy Chase!
Yeah, I'd work with him again!
And I want to look him
straight in the eye
and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying,
no-good, rotten, four-flushing, low-life,
snake-licking...
..dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed,
ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing,
brainless, dickless,
hopeless, heartless,
fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged,
spotty-lipped, worm-headed
sack of monkey shit he is!
I feel fulfilled...
By my standard,
I'm still a movie star!
Oh, my goodness...
Again, my apologies, I...
For what?
Just for being who I am!
Chevy Chase!
You Can Call Me Al
A man walks down the street
He says
why am I soft in the middle now?
Why am I soft in the middle,
the rest of my life is so hard
I need a photo opportunity
I want a shot at redemption
Don't wanna end up a cartoon
in a cartoon graveyard
Bone digger, bone digger
Dogs in the moonlight
Far away in my well-lit door
Mr Beer Belly, Mr Beer Belly
Get these mutts away from me,
you know
I don't find this stuff
amusing anymore
Uh, if you would be my bodyguard
I can be your long-lost pal
I can call you Betty
And Betty, when you call me
you can call me Al...