Irma Vep (1996) Movie Script

I have to close the deal now.
Over and above 5,700,000,
you get 25% of the gross
until you recoup what you're owed.
No way! Then the film is amortised
including an overhead of seven per cent,
plus the 300,000
for the line producer.
Yeah, he's paid, too.
What is it?
Can't you see I'm busy?
Yeah. It's an art film, yeah.
It's cultural, along the lines of...
You'll have all the guarantees you need.
No, there's no need to worry.
He's a good director.
You've heard of him.
I don't know.
I don't know who said so.
I'm not authorised
to negotiate the rent.
Don't worry.
There's no problem.
No problem.
They'll call you, stop by...
I'll ask a few questions.
Let's try to keep this short.
So, first name and last name.
- Height?
- Six feet.
- What have you done recently?
- I was in a show.
- I have the three guns.
- First door on the right.
OK, you were in a play?
- Is Ren in?
- No, he's out.
- Where's Mat?
- Scouting the sewers.
- Good morning.
- There. Hold on two seconds.
Mait said to bring her here
from the airport.
Have her wait in Mat's office.
Here. Goodbye.
She just got off a 12-hour flight!
I don't know. It's up to you.
- Why are you here?
- Mat said...
- Said what?
- To bring her here.
Mat's out for the day!
- Ren has to see her.
- He's out, too.
- Maybe he's coming.
- He said he wasn't.
You're all so fucking incompetent!
I'm up to my arse in work.
Get your shit together.
Can't you get organised?
Niama Films, good morning.
Oh, you're the guy
from the warehouse.
I know something was decided,
but I can't say what.
I'm not authorised to...
Listen, Frederick.
Call the first assistant.
- Are you with Mat?
- No.
- Is that her?
- Yeah, that's Maggie.
Where's Ren?
No one's here for her.
It looks bad.
- What's that?
- She said she was fighting frogmen.
- You're not at Ren's yet?
- At Ren's?
- He's been waiting for an hour.
- No one told me.
I left a message on your beeper.
You didn't pick it up?
- What about our talk?
- I haven't forgotten you.
Kevin, drop her stuff at the hotel.
- I'll be right back, OK?
- OK.
Is it good?
It bunches up here.
- Yeah.
- It's the right size though.
So what do we do?
We can take in the sleeves
even more.
There's not much else to do.
It's crazy. We've already cut it
and it still bunches up.
We'll do it again.
- Don't get upset.
- I'm not upset.
I need the line to be sleek.
When she walks,
it keeps bunching up.
Uh, it's not shiny enough.
There's a spray for that.
It has to be incredibly feminine.
That's the thing.
- Ah!
- There!
Can I see the masks and hoods again?
I want latex from head to toe.
This is a double-layered mask.
There are two zippers.
When you unzip the one in front...
You can see the face
with holes for the mouth and eyes.
- Yes, but I...
- Not bad, huh?
There was a simpler one.
The one I showed you last time.
This one.
With the zipper,
the mouth, the eyes...
What if it doesn't work?
Does it hug the face tight?
You can tuck it into the collar
of the catsuit.
- You want to try?
- Why not? Will you hold this?
How does it feel?
Not bad.
Not bad.
Excuse me. Can I borrow your salt?
Thank you.
- It works real well.
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
- Do you have a second?
- No.
Come on! We're waiting!
I can take my time like everyone else!
- Not now! Let's go!
- Fuck off!
We're coming down the corridor.
I Read you loud and clear.
Why did you tell her that?
She's under hypnosis in the scene.
I thought it was important.
It's best to insist.
I'm not sure
she understands everything I say.
Do you think she does?
Can't you smoke outside?
This is the third time! Are you deaf?
Go smoke outside!
We're shooting!
You find it funny? No, no.
You find this funny? Twenty-five takes
and you're still laughing?
It doesn't work.
Help me, Zo.
Can't you put on a hood by yourself?
What's wrong with the bonnet?
Show me.
We tried tons of times.
The thing is,
you have to stretch it out first.
Yeah, give it a try.
If you stretch it and pull it down fast,
then it works.
It worked before.
- But it's backwards.
- Not at all. I did it once and I got it right!
Everyone, into position!
Ever think about changing jobs?
- That take was no good for me.
- It was no good for anyone.
Come here.
The candelabra...
Down here...
It wasn't too great.
Make the sign up here. Ah?
And put on the hood like I did... Simply.
He's laughing.
It's no laughing matter.
Is it OK now?
Yeah, I'm done.
Get back in the box.
And let's forget
this wax museum stuff.
How's it going?
Are we on schedule?
- We're way behind.
- What?
- Will we wrap on time?
- I have no idea.
- Where's the stunt woman?
- She's in wardrobe.
- What? Go get her!
- OK.
- You promised me extra help.
- I know.
- I did all the packing up!
- We'll talk later!
Not now! It's too late!
Stop barking orders at me!
We have to work
in an orderly way!
- You're just a tidiness freak!
- I certainly am!
You keep things so tidy
that your films suck!
- It's the truth!
- You're part of the team.
- Not for much longer!
- Then pack your bags!
Why should I be bossed around
by watchdogs like you?
Me, a watchdog?
You can breathe down
someone else's neck!
Don't say things now
that you'll regret later.
I Just want to do my job
and fix up Laure's costume.
- You had time to do it before!
- Hands off, hands off.
It'll be fine.
Let her fix up Laure's costume.
- I'll Murder that bitch.
- Keep it under control.
Listen to me!
She's always the same!
Say something. We worked.
We're entitled to your opinion.
I couldn't even hear you breathe!
- Enough's enough!
- Fuck you!
You want my opinion?
It sucks. It's shit.
It sucks!
Fuck you!
That was a barrel of laughs!
He's worse than ever.
- What's the problem?
- Hurry up!
The film's at 10:00.
Everyone left.
Can I have a lift?
Hurry, get in.
I know, we're late.
After the rushes, Rene had a shit fit.
- I brought Maggie, OK?
- No problem.
She's the Chinese actress.
She speaks no French.
What about Markus?
Where's Markus?
Hello. Hello.
- He's not here yet?
- No.
He'll be late.
He got in a fight with Rene. No.
- I bet they're still screaming away.
- Oh.
Roland and Maurice are here.
I'll have a whisky.
Hi there.
You're watching this?
Meet Maggie, the Chinese actress.
She speaks no French.
It's great stuff.
Don't repudiate it now.
Tell me what happened.
Don't brood all night!
There's nothing to tell.
We talked.
It was... Pretty heavy.
He was shooting daggers the whole time.
I tried turning on the radio,
and I thought he'd slaughter me.
He said I didn't understand him,
that I was a mere technician.
Yeah, that's what he said.
You can imagine
how well Markus took it.
I was totally livid.
I've been working with him
for 15 years now.
Can it be that lousy?
He definitely has an eye.
- No, it's fine.
- I think so, too.
He got what he wanted.
It's his film.
He's pissed because it's pretty.
He'll muck it up in the editing room.
- It's not as good as Feuillade.
- Enough of Feuillade!
Feuillade's a drag.
Unless I just don't get it.
Have you seen Les Vampires?
I saw two episodes on video.
Thank God I could fast-forward!
It's pretty flimsy stuff.
It's like serialised novels.
There's a poetry to it.
Well, serialised novels
were never my thing.
It's been done. Why do it again?
You know what I mean?
I told him it wasn't a good idea.
It's a trap.
- He knew that.
- No, he's just starting to realise it. I swear.
That's why he's so down.
Obviously. He feels trapped.
Let's change the subject
and have a drink.
He takes out his problems
on everyone else.
- He's always been a hypocrite.
- That's why I told him off.
He didn't like it,
but he needed to hear it.
Directors thrive on hypocrisy.
Yeah, but sometimes
they go overboard.
I went too far railing on Feuillade.
Too late now.
- So what's the Chinese girl like?
- Not bad.
I don't think she knows why she's here
or what Rene expects of her.
She shuts up and does her job.
- Does she talk about it?
- Not much.
She keeps to herself.
- Is she bored?
- I don't know.
During her costume fitting,
she seemed to get into it.
Her costume is... Pretty tight.
All latex.
It's like she was poured into it.
We were in a sex shop
for God knows how long.
It's the usual,
but no zippers at the breasts.
- There are even zippers here.
- Wow.
But she's pretty,
so she wears it well.
She's pretty all right.
Is she into girls?
I don't know.
I tried hitting on her.
- And?
- I didn't insist. I don't want to fuck up.
But I like her a lot.
Go for it. What's there to lose?
She seems game.
Ren will make my life hell.
- He's interested in her, too?
- No.
If he finds out, he'll get jealous.
He'll torment us.
You don't have to tell him.
Take her home tonight and tomorrow
on the set... Mum's the word.
- I don't know if she'd want to.
- You said that...
No, Mireille.
I was talking about the costume.
- The costume?
- The costume. The tight fit, the latex.
It seemed to turn her on.
It seemed to or it did?
It did.
In fact, she asked
if she could buy it after the shoot.
- She asked you that?
- Yes, yes.
- When?
- Here. Just before dinner.
And you like her
dressed as Cat-woman?
Yeah, she's great-looking.
In fact,
you want to touch her,
play with her.
She's like a plastic toy!
Watch out.
- If she asked for the costume...
- Shh!
- Am I that funny?
- No, go on!
- Then you should go for it.
- You think so?
Why else would she have come?
They left her stranded at the lab.
I was the only person left.
She could have gone back
to her hotel.
She's all alone in Paris.
She has no one.
If she has no one,
make the most of it.
- I think she likes me.
- And wanting the costume...
Is a way of telling you
she wants you.
Stop! You're wrong about the costume!
It was cut to her size.
- That's all it means.
- Analyse the situation.
She follows you. She's in there,
surrounded by strangers.
She can't speak a word. Uh...
She's totally dependent on you.
She wants to be here. It's 1:00 a.m.
She's shooting tomorrow.
If she wasn't "into it,"
she'd be in bed already.
Stop. Stop.
- What's more...
- Stop!
...she takes you aside
to ask to buy her costume.
- Stop!
- It's obvious. It means, "I'm into it."
- No.
- "I'm into wearing my costume."
Stop it! You're crazy!
She's cold.
Maurice, pour me a glass.
I don't know which glass is mine.
Thank you.
- Your wife's a pain in the arse.
- What did she do?
I told her Maggie turned me on.
- Now she's throwing her into my bed!
- Thanks.
- Just to screw things up.
- Changed your mind?
I don't know.
I drank too much.
She's screwing things up!
Look how she's smooth-talking her!
You'll keep quiet next time.
Live and learn.
Thanks, but who has to work with her
for a certain lapse of time?
I do.
- Louder, Jessica.
- OK.
He'll tell Ren.
It'll all turn against me.
You're acting like kids.
Turn it down, Jessica.
- Good evening.
- Good evening, madam.
- Uh, Room 612, please.
- 612.
- 612.
- Thank you.
- You have several messages.
- Thank you.
Here. Goodnight.
- Are you OK?
- Yeah.
Can't we drive you to the hotel?
No, thanks. I have my car.
You sure you have a room?
I Reserved it.
There's no problem.
I'll call you tomorrow.
Here's the story:
the doctor's examining him.
The tranquillisers seem to be working.
On the surface, he's calm enough.
But all the same...
If he stays here,
I'm going to need a discharge.
What's a discharge?
I need two people to vouch for him.
Or else I'll take him in.
He was rude. Wasn't he rude?
- Was he or wasn't he?
- Yes.
I understand very well.
But he's a very fragile person.
OK, forget it.
The doctor said to take two now
and one tomorrow.
Oh. Ren. Are you OK?
We should let him get some rest.
- Yes.
- Let him rest up.
Half an hour to get a skeleton key!
Who knows what
may have happened to her?
- Excuse me.
- Maggie.
- I can open it.
- She's always on time.
I know you can open it.
That's why we're here.
- Turn on the light, please.
- Sure.
Everything's OK, so I'll go.
OK, cut.
Very good. Are you OK?
- We'll do it once more.
- OK.
I felt you were forcing it.
It should come across as effortless.
OK. I was too much of a pro.
I'll try to be more instinctive.
- You have to be even more supple.
- Uh-huh.
A little more... What's the word?
Feline. More feline.
- What are we doing?
- We'll do it one last time.
- OK?
- OK.
Positions, please!
You were supposed
to be here at 8:30.
- She overslept.
- Why didn't you call her?
I did call. She didn't answer.
I let it ring and ring!
I bet you did!
What do you know? Anyway,
she won't start shooting until 11:00.
That's not your problem!
Don't bother picking her up anymore.
You're unreliable!
Where's Ren?
How should I know?
Maybe this is him calling!
Here she is.
Are you ready?
- Let me take a look.
- Come see.
Move in closer.
She's gorgeous.
I'll Sit here. OK.
Let me open this.
- There. How's that?
- Good.
- Ready?
- You can announce it.
Maggie Cheung. Take 1.
Ren is a pain in the arse!
- Has he really disappeared?
- I don't know.
Zo says Mat can't find him.
He's not at home.
His wife doesn't know where he is.
We're screwed!
Wait. It's happened before.
Yeah, sometimes he's late,
but he never just vanishes.
He better get back soon.
Today's my last day.
Tomorrow we take Polyeucte
to Hnin-Litard.
Did Polyeuctee do well?
Yeah. It's a three-month tour.
Incredibly well-paid.
Laure, follow me.
I can fix your costume now.
Don't iron now.
Get me the costumes from the truck.
- Where's Rene?
- No one knows. Maybe Mat.
But if she does,
she won't tell me.
What do we do? Just wait?
We'll try shooting without him.
If that doesn't work,
if he doesn't pop up,
we call it a day.
Shit, it's all wrinkled again.
What a pain.
Fuck! It's ripped.
It's incredibly fragile.
What did you do?
I don't know. I didn't notice.
Jesus Christ.
What do I do now?
- You really slept with Maggie?
- Says who?
She's telling everyone
you took her home, not to the hotel...
And scored her.
Those were her words.
I don't fucking believe it!
What a bitch! That's total bullshit!
I never even touched her!
Don't tell her I told you.
Fuck that bitch.
Do you know Jos Murano?
Hold on. Don't move.
I did a film with him.
This material really sucks.
- Is he a good director?
- Yeah, not bad.
This isn't working.
Let me try something else.
Get undressed.
I'll stick gaffer tape inside.
He left me three messages this morning.
He must have a role for me.
Call him back for sure.
Take it! Take it!
And with this weapon,
kill the Great Vampire.
Am I disturbing you?
Actually, we're rehearsing.
Forget it. It's a wrap.
- How do you know?
- I know.
And what about my scene?
I don't get it. What is this?
There's no call for tomorrow.
- Are you Jos Murano?
- Yes.
- I'm sorry. I'm late.
- No problem.
- What will you have?
- Uh...
- What are you having?
- A beer.
Oh, yes?
Me too. A beer.
- A beer for her and another for me.
- Yes.
- We've never really met.
- No.
I'm happy to get to know you better.
We've never really...
Spoken together.
I've seen all your films.
Excuse me for insisting so much.
It's something of an emergency.
- Do you know why?
- No.
- Oh, damn.
- No, not really.
Then I'll tell you.
Ren can't finish the film.
Is that definite?
The truth is, he's had
a sort of nervous breakdown.
He's in a rest home.
No need to panic.
It's in the country.
There's a big garden.
He agreed to it.
His doctor decided.
What a disaster.
- We'll stop shooting.
- No.
I was asked to take over.
It's touchy.
Can I really accept?
Ren is a friend.
You have a bit of foam...
Don't let it get around.
I don't understand something.
Why a Chinese girl? Do you know?
- Ren said that...
- Ren.
Whenever Rene opens his mouth,
people stop thinking.
You saw the state he's in.
Who am | to say?
He must have had a reason.
I'm serious! Why a Chinese girl?
He said he'd seen Maggie in a film...
And it seemed self-evident.
But why?
Come on. I saw Les Vampires
30 years ago at the Cinmathque.
Irma Vep is Paris.
She's the Paris underworld.
She's working-class Paris.
She's Arletty!
Irma Vep is street thugs and slums!
Les Vampires
isn't Fu Manchu, right?
It's not Fu Manchu.
I don't know.
I don't know anymore.
Can I have a light?
I've seen Maggie in the rushes.
She has a nice body. She's graceful.
That's totally besides the point!
I'm sure she's great.
I saw her in that Jack Chan film.
What was the title?
What a piece of crap!
She was fine.
But she's not Irma Vep!
No. I understand.
I See what you mean.
I told them I'm not working now.
Things are slow.
My welfare's running out.
I said... I need to think. A little.
They said to think fast.
I said OK.
But only if I could change actresses.
That Chinese girl,
she's really not for me.
You'd be much better.
Yes, you.
Are you offering me the role?
Uh, yeah.
Oh. But...
- What about Maggie?
- Maggie, Maggie...
She'll understand.
She'll go back to Hong Kong.
For me, this is really...
Really difficult.
How is it difficult? Why?
I wouldn't want people saying...
- Saying what?
- That I plotted to steal her role.
It would be great
to play Irma Vep, but...
People talk and rumours spread fast.
Here's fine. Stop here.
So we head towards Le Bourget.
We have to go to...
No. Towards the industrial park,
but we turn off before.
It's not far from Carpet Emporium...
And the Decathlon warehouses.
At the corner of Bricomarch,
where there used to be
a Family Furniture Outlet.
- You see?
- Not at all. I don't know it.
I'll tell you as we go along.
- Go towards Le Bourget.
- OK.
- Could you wait five minutes?
- OK.
After the screening,
we'll go to the production office.
OK. Will this take long?
No, it's what Ren edited.
- He did it himself?
- Yes.
When did he edit?
At night.
He always works that way.
I See.
Hi, Jos.
Yes. I Faxed you the insurance claim.
Did you get it?
What? No, not over the phone.
I'll come and see you. Thanks.
- Where's Maggie?
- I have no idea.
- She said she'd come.
- Then she should be here.
- Kevin.
- Yes?
Where's Maggie?
She wasn't at the hotel.
She left no messages.
I got her a ticket for 6:00 tonight.
To be at the airport by 4:30,
she should leave her hotel at...
- Who's driving her?
- I don't know. You!
- Are you crazy? I can't!
- I sure as hell can't! No way!
I'm meeting with the insurers.
It's urgent!
It's incredibly urgent!
Go ahead.
Her ticket is for Hong Kong?
- I even got her upgraded into first class.
- Ah.
She's not going to Hong Kong.
She's going to New York.
No, Los Angeles.
She's meeting Ridley Scott.
You got it all wrong. Totally.
After seeing Ridley Scott
in New York,
she's meeting her agent
in Los Angeles.
It was so obvious.
Since when?
She told me yesterday.
She spoke to Ridley Scott yesterday.
Jrome. Jrome.
The screening's about to start.
Come on.
We're starting now.
You'll have to find someone
to replace Laure.
To replace Laure?
Oh, yeah. Shit.
Are you free after the projection?
- Of course.
- I need to see you.