Kill Your Lover (2023) Movie Script
1
[music playing]
- We make each other miserable.
Neither one of us has had
the courage to admit it,
but every time you try and
plan ahead, all I can think
is, maybe I'll be
rid of you by then.
The cold, hard truth is, I
don't think I like you now,
and I don't think you
actually like me either.
I think the thing
that makes the most
sense is for us to break it off
before we become truly toxic.
But I hope we can
still be friends?
- Fuck off.
- What?
- Like, just remind me
never to let you be the one
to give me bad news, please.
- It needs to be harsh.
- Yeah, but let's just still
be friends, that's just mean,
like just rip his heart out.
- You're the one
that's been telling me
to break up with him forever.
- Yeah, very cool but
don't destroy him.
- I feel like I need
to make him hate me.
It feels like that's the only
way to make it stick I mean,
it's not like I haven't tried
to break up with him before.
- Do you want some?
OK, you need it.
Go on, you need it.
You need it.
- Oh, fuck.
[punk rock music]
What are you doing?
Nathan.
- Trying to get to
the bottom of it.
[punk rock music]
The band looks good.
How long did it take
you to cover this wall?
- It's not like I planned it.
And it's always changing.
Everything is replaceable.
Personal mantra.
- Most of the band
is dead and gone.
- That is Joe's drummer.
- So that means there's some
room on your wall available.
- You don't just want
this to be a casual thing?
- I think you're interesting.
Hopefully, I didn't
bore you too much.
I know chemistry is not the most
interesting of topics, but--
- Nah, you're not boring.
- What, is it to prove
that I'm not boring?
- No, it's me being polite.
- Sure.
Fuck it.
- So if I put you on my
wall, can I be on yours?
- Sure.
Yeah, but I'm more
of a clean walls,
picture frames type of guy.
You think you can handle that?
- Hell, even one day and you're
already trying to change me.
I like your bum.
We could do a second date,
and see where this takes us.
- Oh, fuck's sake.
You've got a bedrooms.
Use it.
- Well, she has a point.
- Don't chicken out on me.
I can see you doubting yourself.
- Put that away.
- No.
No.
- I mean, put--
- You're overreacting so much.
- Lover?
Axel, is that you?
- Yeah.
Yeah, it's me.
They sent me home early.
I've got to-- I've
got to throw up.
[grunting]
- Ugh.
- I'll bring you a cup of tea.
- It's probably
just mouth flush.
- What?
- And what are you going to say?
Don't say it.
Don't say it.
- I can't do it
while he's like this.
- He's a drama queen.
He's overreacting.
He doesn't want to talk to
me, so he heard my voice.
He's just lying
saying, oh, I'm sick.
Right.
I'm saying it's like a bandage.
You just got to rip it off.
Rip it off.
[distant voices]
- What happened to
break up with him.
Don't destroy it.
He's a big boy.
He can handle it.
- I am--
I am going to break off, it
just make sense right now.
- Good to go.
I love you so much,
but look at yourself.
You're literally making tea out
of a whistling fucking kettle.
Right, you would have laughed
at that hipster bullshit
two years ago.
- I like the kettle.
- It's not about
the kettle, is it?
- I am going to
break it off, it's
just today is just
not the right time.
- I-- I don't want you to
be 20 years down the line--
look at me.
Look at me.
I don't want you to be 20
years old down the line
with a bunch of kids,
and a fucking husband.
- OK.
- --just because you
couldn't find the right time.
OK?
- All right.
As soon as he starts to get
better, I'll break it off,
all right?
- Yep.
Do I need to stay?
- No, he's never going
to get better with you
looming in the background.
- OK.
I'll head off then.
All right, text me
when you've done it.
Yes?
- Yeah.
- I love you.
Stay strong, OK?
- I will.
Thanks for everything.
- Buy, bitch.
Love ya.
- Jesus, babe, you look awful.
- Thanks.
You're smoking?
- Um, I just threw
it out the window.
The smell would have
been gone by the time you
got back, it's just,
obviously, you're back early.
- I really wish you
wouldn't do that.
- Well, I said it was OK.
It's my responsibility.
- No.
You've done so well quitting.
If she was a good
friend, she wouldn't
be smoking in front of you.
I'm sorry.
I'm just not in a good
place right now, and I'm--
- OK.
- Thank you for the tea.
- You're welcome.
- You do take good
care of me, lover.
Can we talk?
- Sure.
- We've been in a bit of a funk.
I've noticed it, and I'm
pretty sure you've noticed it.
So we haven't got any time
to spend with each other
with you working these
weird hours all the time.
- I have weird hours because
I'm working three jobs.
- Ah, and this is what I mean.
Like, every time, it's like
we're trying to constantly see
the fight in the other person.
- OK.
Fine.
Just maybe don't start
off by making it my fault.
- I didn't say it
was your fault. OK.
Reset.
I'm sorry.
- I'm sorry.
- No, I'm sorry.
What I'm trying to say
is that we both need
to make effort for both of us.
Is that fair?
- What are you doing?
- Making time for both of us.
- You're sick.
- My germs are your germs.
Come on.
Please.
- OK.
- How many men have
you slept with?
- What, do you
actually want to know?
- I don't know, do we?
What?
What did I say?
- Well I mean, I don't think
you actually want to know.
Guys say they want
to know, but--
- Doesn't matter.
- Sure.
- Look, I already know it's
going to be more than me.
I've had two-long term
girlfriends and you,
so that's three, including you.
- Why do you need to know?
- I don't need to know.
I just thought we
could talk about it.
Do you know, I've never
liked the term boyfriend.
- Where did that come from?
- Are you seeing anyone else?
- Kind of.
Not really.
- I mean, so what is this?
Are we a thing?
- A thing?
- I don't know, are we
working towards something?
Do we have the talk?
- What do you mean, that talk?
Are you having that?
- I mean, yeah.
Yeah, I think we
should have that talk.
Or we don't need to.
Forget about it.
We can just--
- No.
Wait.
Wait.
Wait.
Wait.
Wait.
I'm sorry, it's
just scary for me.
I mean, I'm not sure I'm quite
comfortable admitting to myself
just how into you I am.
- You're into me?
- Really into you.
So if you don't want to
be called my boyfriend,
what would you want to
be called, my partner?
- God, no.
- No?
- Pretty boring.
So informal.
I want something a
bit more passionate.
Do you know what I think is
a really underrated term?
- What?
- Lover.
No.
No, I'm serious.
Lover.
My lover.
- My lover.
- I would love for a gorgeous
woman to call me their lover.
I went for a weekend
excursion with my lover.
- My lover.
- Yeah, my lover.
- Would you like to
fuck again, my lover?
- Yes, I would.
What are your fantasies?
- You mean like
what turns me on?
- M-hm.
- You first.
- I've always wanted
to have a threesome.
- Don't.
- How predictable.
No, fair enough.
I'd say it's a little overrated.
- What, you've done it?
Which way?
- Both.
Preferred it with two women.
- So what about you?
What can I do for you?
- Kind of like being tied up.
Restrained.
- Really?
I mean, we could try it.
- It's just something I like.
We don't have to.
- No, look, if you want to do
it, I want to do it for you.
Is this OK?
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
- A threesome is something
we could make happen.
- Really?
- Yeah.
I know some people.
- You know some people.
- Yeah.
- Oh, it's that easy.
You know some people.
- Yeah, why not?
- What else?
What else can I do for you?
- I like being choked.
- I can do it, but I don't know
how I'd feel doing that to you.
- You can grip harder.
Just help me.
- I don't know.
- That's OK.
Hey, it's OK.
It's OK.
- Look, I can try it, but I'm
not sure how I feel about it.
- It's OK.
Only works if we're
both having fun.
I love you.
- Me too.
- I love you!
- I love you.
- Axel, ow.
Ow.
Axel.
Axel.
- I love you.
- Over.
Oh, what the fuck!
- I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
- You don't fucking
listen to me!
Oh, fuck.
- Dakota.
Dakota, I need you.
Ah!
Ah!
Ow.
Dakota, help me!
Help me!
- Come on.
That's it.
OK.
Just go.
Oh, gosh.
Oh, god.
You're burning up.
We need to cool you down.
- Thanks for taking care of me.
- Just stay focused on me, OK?
- You mean so much to me.
Ow!
- What happened to you?
- What?
I don't know.
- OK.
It's OK.
It's OK.
Come.
Careful.
Look.
Oh, my.
I need to call an ambulance.
- No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No, love.
No.
No, stay.
I'm scared.
I don't know what's going on.
- I'm not going anywhere.
I'm just going to go into the
other room to get my phone, OK?
I'll be right back.
- You'll stay with me?
- I'm here for you.
I'll be right back, OK?
- OK.
- OK.
- OK.
- Great.
- Hello.
Emergency service operator.
Which service do you require--
fire, police, or ambulance?
- I need an ambulance.
My boyfriend--
there's someone here
that needs emergency
medical help.
- Where are you calling from?
Hello?
Hello.
- Please, can you come
and take him away?
- Can you just stay on the line?
- That thing is hideous.
- That thing is a
family heirloom.
- Well, it's a hideous
family heirloom.
- Do you know how
much that's worth?
- What?
- It's worth about
its weight in gold,
because it has
sentimental value.
- Well, it's fucking ugly.
- Dakota, you asked
me to move in.
You know?
I'm helping you pay rent.
- Yeah, that's fair enough.
I mean, it's your space now too.
I've got to start getting
ready for work now though,
so feel free not to save
me any boxes to unpack.
- You working at
the bar tonight?
- Yeah, I'm covering
a shift for Rose.
It's not like I
don't need the money.
- I thought we said--
oh, forget it.
It doesn't matter.
- It's not like I'm not
looking for another job.
- Yeah, and it's not like I
haven't tried to help you.
Try to hook you up with
a receptionist job.
- Oh, yeah, they probably
want you to change your hair
and remove your piercings
and cover up your tattoos.
- I'm just trying to help.
- I'm sorry.
- Fuck, I'm sorry.
- I'm genuinely sorry.
- I am sorry.
I am way, way more sorry.
- Fuck you, I'm the one
that's really sorry.
- I wish you could
be as sorry as I am.
- Why do we suck at fighting?
- Because we're so
fucking charming.
Look, it's you me
against the world, right?
- Damn right.
Right.
I've got to get ready for work.
- Why are you always
slapping my arse?
- 'Cause It's so fucking cute.
What are you doing?
- I just think it's maybe
time for some photos of us.
- Fair enough.
- Have a good time at work.
[dramatic music]
- Who the fuck are you?
- OK.
I'm going to need
a hand with this.
[dramatic music]
- He's definitely excreting it.
- You know, if you walked
into the hospital with these,
I'd say they were
chemical burns.
Seem pretty clean.
- I had to wash
them straight away.
- It looks like you
did a great job.
- Your breathing is fine.
Your pulse is normal.
Are you feeling any discomfort?
- I told you I feel fine, it's
just some sort of reaction.
It will clear up.
- With all due respect,
sir, you burned your partner
with something that's
excreting from your pores.
Your body is covered in
bruises and black veins.
I don't think there's a
term in Latin or anything
otherwise to describe
what is happening.
You're about as far from
fine as I can imagine.
- Yeah, well, I feel fine.
- He was having a
seizure earlier.
- She's overreacting.
Was shivering.
I was cold.
- That seems a bit
strange that you're
currently sitting
in ice cold water
and seem perfectly comfortable.
- I can give you
something for the pain.
- It's fine.
They don't hurt.
- These are chemical burns.
They should be excruciating.
- Look, you may feel fine
now, but the reality is,
is we don't know what
is happening to you.
Your body could be
in a state of shock.
- I'm not going anywhere.
- If you're in trouble,
you can give us a sign.
I mean, if you feel like
you couldn't say it,
just give us a signal.
- Why don't you just
give me some antibiotics
and leave me alone?
- Sir, I don't understand why
you're being so difficult.
- I didn't call you.
I don't want you here.
- Babe, I think it
might be for the best.
- Yeah, of course
you'd say that.
- Lover, I think
there's something
seriously wrong with you.
I think you need
to go with them.
- Why?
I don't want to go.
- Could you give us a minute?
- We'll be just outside, OK?
- Please, look at yourself.
- If I go to the hospital,
will you come with me?
- I think you need
to go on your own.
I think it's going to be
better if we stay apart.
That we make each other
miserable, and neither one of us
has had the courage to admit it.
- I make you miserable?
- No.
I'm saying we make each
other miserable, Axel.
- This is Rose's
bullshit, isn't it?
- Just let me speak.
I had a whole thing
prepared, and you just--
- Fuck off.
Just speak to me like
I'm a human being.
- Fine.
I'm leaving you.
I need to leave you.
- Wow, just like that.
- I just don't like you anymore,
and I don't think you like me.
- Fuck off.
Just stop patronizing me!
- Look, I think you just need
to take a minute and calm down.
All right, mate?
- Get the fuck out
of my face, mate.
- Take it down a notch.
Sir, as paramedics, we will not
tolerate any abusive behavior.
Ricky, stop it.
That isn't useful.
- I don't know.
It's OK.
We're OK.
- Fair enough.
Shake.
- Ricky.
- Come on, mate.
Put it behind us.
Ah, come on, mate.
[laughing] We good, yeah?
- Yeah.
Yeah, we're-- let go.
- I'm not.
- All right, let go.
Let go.
- Axel, let go.
- Let go.
No, no, no, no.
Don't do that.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Hey.
Ah!
Oh, let go of me!
- All right, fuck off.
Get out of my house and
leave me and my lady alone.
[crunching sounds]
[gasping]
[screaming]
[intense music]
- You're infected.
- My germs are your germs.
[gasping]
[screaming]
- I just want you to
listen to my side.
So let's talk this out.
Sorry about the eye.
I love this lamp.
- I know you do.
- Do you know why
I love this lamp?
I love this lamp
because it reminds me
of my grandparents'
house that I used
to go to as a child when
things weren't good at home.
I love the lamp because
it makes me feel safety.
It makes me feel comfort,
respite from me parents'
fucking bad marriage.
But again, you wouldn't
know this, would you?
Dakota, you don't-- you don't
ask people questions about
themselves.
It's all me, me,
me, to do with me.
Because you want to break up.
The one I got saying
this, by the way,
maybe I don't want to break up.
Maybe I'd like to
work on our issues.
Talk to our problems,
instead of focusing on
oh, so unhappy, so unhappy.
Now, why do you get to
decide if we break up?
You don't I think I
have my issues with you?
Dakota, look at me
when I talk to you.
Look at me when I'm
fucking talking to you!
Your problem, Dakota,
is that you just
don't care about anything.
Anything.
You've become so fucking
jaded and cynical.
It's not my fault your
music career has gone kaput
and your little band
went down the drain.
It doesn't give you the excuse
to talk to me and other people
like shit in your fucking shoe.
Look at this place.
Look.
Genuinely.
Look at this nice place
that I bought for us.
I want to build
something with you.
I wanted a fucking
life with you.
And also, by the
way, for the record,
I never told you
to quit smoking.
That was your decision.
You decided that.
I supported you,
then I support you
when you act like I'm fucking,
I'm forcing you to do it?
Do you think that I don't
know you're smoking?
- Well, in that case, I'm
going to have a smoke.
That kink handcuffs, Axel,
they have a safety lever.
- You know, you're so selfish.
Excuse me if I want you
to live a little longer.
- Excuse me for
saying everything
in a passive aggressive
tone because I'm too
pussy just to come out with it.
- Stop fucking imitating me!
- Why do you even
want to be with me?
- I think--
I think of--
I think despite everything,
you still make me [indistinct]..
- Ah!
- Can you just stay
still and listen to me?
Seriously.
Dakota, what is wrong with me?
What is so bad about me?
I never cheated on you.
I paid your rent
when you were skint.
I even did that BDSM shit
you're into even though you know
it makes me feel uncomfortable.
- Fuck off.
I didn't force you
to do anything.
You stopped
communicating with me.
I'm not a fucking mind reader.
- What is so wrong with me?
- I thought you loved me for
me, but every day, you just
keep cutting me down.
If it's not you telling
me I'm not employable,
it's that I don't
make enough money
or that I embarrass you because
I fucked all my friends.
You moved me here even though
you knew I didn't want to.
I compromised for
you, and now, I
feel like I've got nothing left.
You just want me to
be a different person,
and you keep trying to change
me because the way I am just
isn't good enough.
- Well, I'm sorry that I don't
want to live in a shit hole
apartment, with pictures of
your tits and every bloke
you fucked all over
my living room wall.
- Do you know what, but
the photos is fair enough.
- No.
No.
No.
No.
Dakota, no.
- And do I fucking
hate this lamp.
- Don't.
You know how much
that that means to me.
- So if I break it,
will you let me go?
Well?
- No.
- Let's see.
- No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No!
[gasping]
- Your germs are my germs.
If you really want to have
this out, we can have it out,
but please do you remember
I tried to make this easy.
- All right.
Bring it.
[sparring sounds]
- That was awful for me, Axel.
I thought I was supposed
to be meeting your mom,
but actually, I just got
fucking ignored the whole time.
- Come on, relax.
She says your tattoos look nice.
- No, she didn't.
She said, are you--
are you sure you're
going go be able to get
a job with those tattoos?
Fuck off.
- First of all--
- I get it from you,
and I get it from her.
Just leave me alone.
- If you act like
a child, I'm going
to speak to you like a child.
- You think you communicate
with me, but you don't.
I have no idea what
you want from me.
- I just feel like I'm not
enough for you sometimes.
- Well, what do
you want me to do?
- Maybe when we meet
someone from your past,
maybe don't tell me
that you fucked them.
- You know how we started.
Don't act like you don't
know I have a past.
- This isn't the past, Dakota.
This is like using your pussy
to shake hands with every cunt
that you fucking met.
- Ah!
- What's the matter, I though
you liked being dominated.
- Oh.
Ah!
I'm sleeping.
Just because you don't go
out doesn't mean I can't.
OK?
I like going out, and I like
having fun with my friends,
and I shouldn't
have to feel like I
have to stay home with my
boyfriend every single night.
What do you want, a pet?
- Do you want a
boyfriend, or do you
want an assistant to
bring you food and drink
and fucking tell you how
beautiful you are all the time?
- Because she was making
comments about it.
the whole way through!
- She was just
pointing stuff out.
- What do you want me to do,
turn up in a fucking flowery
dress and I don't
know, that is not me!
- Would it kill you to put
a fucking dress on for once?
- Are you fucking kidding me?
- No.
- Fuck off.
Actually, fuck off.
- I don't know what
the fuck is going on.
I'm living in fucking
cuckoo land here.
- Oh, fuck!
- Can I talk to you
about something?
- I can't find my keys, and
I'm going to be late for work.
- Wait, you're going
to be late for work
because you're going to have
to clean up this mess first.
- I do not have time
to clean up that mess.
- Look at the state
of this place.
Not just this room, fucking
this room, the bathroom.
- I will clean it up later, OK?
- Dakota, If we
don't clean it up,
no one is going to clean it up.
We need a change.
- OK, what do you want?
I'll start going somewhere
else to have my parties.
- I can't live like a student.
I would like to have a
shower that actually works.
I'd like to have a phone
that actually works.
I'd like to have
neighbors that don't
scream in the middle
of the fucking night.
And ideally, no fucking
parties at 4:00 in the AM.
- I don't know how to have this
conversation with you right now.
All I'm thinking about is
that I'm going to lose my job,
and then I'll have
less money, and then
there'll be more problems.
I am trying to stay afloat.
Can you just help?
Now, where are my keys?
- Two minutes, just listen.
I'll have a place.
I would like to buy
the place, and I would
like for you to live with me.
You can pay me back in some
sort of reimbursement scheme.
- I don't want to owe you
any more money than I already
fucking do.
- You already owe me
money, so it doesn't make
much of a fucking difference.
- It does.
It does make a
difference, because I
am going to have nothing left.
- Why are you making
this so difficult?
I'm coming with your
fucking solutions.
Ah!
Fuck's sake.
I just wish she could
be a bit more careful.
I don't want to live in a flat
with cigarette marks everywhere.
- Buy a blanket or
something to cover it up.
- With what money, Dakota?
God!
You don't have to do this.
You know I'm stronger
than you are.
Fun to grow up.
Ah!
Ah!
- Patronizing fuck.
For the record, this is how
you actually choke someone.
- Let's communicate.
Let's talk this out.
- I am trying to communicate.
- No, you're shouting at me.
- I am telling--
yes, because you're
not listening to me.
I'm fucking sick of you speaking
to me like I am a child.
I don't like fighting
like this, Axel.
Either get better aim
or sit down to pee.
I'm fucking sick of it.
[intense music]
[coughing]
- If you want out of
this relationship,
you're going to have
to go through me.
[screaming]
Let's not look so
serious all the time.
Could you just smile?
- You smile like an
idiot in every photo.
- Yeah.
Look, I just want a photo.
You're not doing the hard
rock chick thing all the time,
you know?
- I smile in photos.
- No, you smile
when you're drunk.
- OK.
You want me to fake it.
- Look, I just want a
photograph I can send to me mom
and I can put it on the wall.
Is that too much to ask for?
- OK.
Fine.
I have something to
say, and if you love me,
you'll let me get all the way
through without interrupting me.
Look, we make each other
miserable, and neither one of us
has had the courage to admit it.
Every time you
try to plan ahead,
I just can't help
but think maybe
I'll be rid of you by then.
That's bullshit.
I mean, you haven't
been perfect,
but I haven't been honest.
Maybe I let you on.
And I couldn't leave you because
I didn't know what I wanted,
but that wasn't fair on you.
You're scared.
I'm scared too, but
I'm more afraid of what
happens if we don't end this
while we have the chance.
You're not good for me, but
I'm not good for you either.
That's why we have to end this.
Let's make it to this the
last thing we do together.
- No.
- Agree to disagree then.
[gasping]
- Ah!
Ah!
- I hope we can
still be friends.
One.
Two.
One, two, three, four.
[suzi moon, "dumb & in luv"]
Act I, we met and some fun
Holding hands under
the blackpool sun
Act II, we drove in the van
I never thought I
would see you again
I'm dumb and in luv
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in luv
I'm dumb in luv
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in luv
Act III, I was
sitting at your bar
Guilty eyed disguised
as shooting stars
Act IV, you stab me in the back
Dirty rat, how dare
you live like that?
I'm dumb and in luv
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in luv
I'm dumb and in luv
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in luv
I'm dumb
So dumb
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in luv
I'm dumb, so dumb
Dumb, dumb, dumb and--
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in--
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in luv.
D-U-M-B L-U-V
L-U-V D-U-M-B
D-U-M-B
L-U-V
Does she know the
truth about me?
Well, I'm dumb and in luv
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in luv
I'm dumb in luv
Dumb, dumb, dumb in luv
Well, dumb, so dumb
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in luv
Well, I'm dumb
How dumb?
So dumb
That's luv
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in--
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in--
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in--
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in--
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in--
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in--
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in--
Dumb and in luv
[music playing]
- We make each other miserable.
Neither one of us has had
the courage to admit it,
but every time you try and
plan ahead, all I can think
is, maybe I'll be
rid of you by then.
The cold, hard truth is, I
don't think I like you now,
and I don't think you
actually like me either.
I think the thing
that makes the most
sense is for us to break it off
before we become truly toxic.
But I hope we can
still be friends?
- Fuck off.
- What?
- Like, just remind me
never to let you be the one
to give me bad news, please.
- It needs to be harsh.
- Yeah, but let's just still
be friends, that's just mean,
like just rip his heart out.
- You're the one
that's been telling me
to break up with him forever.
- Yeah, very cool but
don't destroy him.
- I feel like I need
to make him hate me.
It feels like that's the only
way to make it stick I mean,
it's not like I haven't tried
to break up with him before.
- Do you want some?
OK, you need it.
Go on, you need it.
You need it.
- Oh, fuck.
[punk rock music]
What are you doing?
Nathan.
- Trying to get to
the bottom of it.
[punk rock music]
The band looks good.
How long did it take
you to cover this wall?
- It's not like I planned it.
And it's always changing.
Everything is replaceable.
Personal mantra.
- Most of the band
is dead and gone.
- That is Joe's drummer.
- So that means there's some
room on your wall available.
- You don't just want
this to be a casual thing?
- I think you're interesting.
Hopefully, I didn't
bore you too much.
I know chemistry is not the most
interesting of topics, but--
- Nah, you're not boring.
- What, is it to prove
that I'm not boring?
- No, it's me being polite.
- Sure.
Fuck it.
- So if I put you on my
wall, can I be on yours?
- Sure.
Yeah, but I'm more
of a clean walls,
picture frames type of guy.
You think you can handle that?
- Hell, even one day and you're
already trying to change me.
I like your bum.
We could do a second date,
and see where this takes us.
- Oh, fuck's sake.
You've got a bedrooms.
Use it.
- Well, she has a point.
- Don't chicken out on me.
I can see you doubting yourself.
- Put that away.
- No.
No.
- I mean, put--
- You're overreacting so much.
- Lover?
Axel, is that you?
- Yeah.
Yeah, it's me.
They sent me home early.
I've got to-- I've
got to throw up.
[grunting]
- Ugh.
- I'll bring you a cup of tea.
- It's probably
just mouth flush.
- What?
- And what are you going to say?
Don't say it.
Don't say it.
- I can't do it
while he's like this.
- He's a drama queen.
He's overreacting.
He doesn't want to talk to
me, so he heard my voice.
He's just lying
saying, oh, I'm sick.
Right.
I'm saying it's like a bandage.
You just got to rip it off.
Rip it off.
[distant voices]
- What happened to
break up with him.
Don't destroy it.
He's a big boy.
He can handle it.
- I am--
I am going to break off, it
just make sense right now.
- Good to go.
I love you so much,
but look at yourself.
You're literally making tea out
of a whistling fucking kettle.
Right, you would have laughed
at that hipster bullshit
two years ago.
- I like the kettle.
- It's not about
the kettle, is it?
- I am going to
break it off, it's
just today is just
not the right time.
- I-- I don't want you to
be 20 years down the line--
look at me.
Look at me.
I don't want you to be 20
years old down the line
with a bunch of kids,
and a fucking husband.
- OK.
- --just because you
couldn't find the right time.
OK?
- All right.
As soon as he starts to get
better, I'll break it off,
all right?
- Yep.
Do I need to stay?
- No, he's never going
to get better with you
looming in the background.
- OK.
I'll head off then.
All right, text me
when you've done it.
Yes?
- Yeah.
- I love you.
Stay strong, OK?
- I will.
Thanks for everything.
- Buy, bitch.
Love ya.
- Jesus, babe, you look awful.
- Thanks.
You're smoking?
- Um, I just threw
it out the window.
The smell would have
been gone by the time you
got back, it's just,
obviously, you're back early.
- I really wish you
wouldn't do that.
- Well, I said it was OK.
It's my responsibility.
- No.
You've done so well quitting.
If she was a good
friend, she wouldn't
be smoking in front of you.
I'm sorry.
I'm just not in a good
place right now, and I'm--
- OK.
- Thank you for the tea.
- You're welcome.
- You do take good
care of me, lover.
Can we talk?
- Sure.
- We've been in a bit of a funk.
I've noticed it, and I'm
pretty sure you've noticed it.
So we haven't got any time
to spend with each other
with you working these
weird hours all the time.
- I have weird hours because
I'm working three jobs.
- Ah, and this is what I mean.
Like, every time, it's like
we're trying to constantly see
the fight in the other person.
- OK.
Fine.
Just maybe don't start
off by making it my fault.
- I didn't say it
was your fault. OK.
Reset.
I'm sorry.
- I'm sorry.
- No, I'm sorry.
What I'm trying to say
is that we both need
to make effort for both of us.
Is that fair?
- What are you doing?
- Making time for both of us.
- You're sick.
- My germs are your germs.
Come on.
Please.
- OK.
- How many men have
you slept with?
- What, do you
actually want to know?
- I don't know, do we?
What?
What did I say?
- Well I mean, I don't think
you actually want to know.
Guys say they want
to know, but--
- Doesn't matter.
- Sure.
- Look, I already know it's
going to be more than me.
I've had two-long term
girlfriends and you,
so that's three, including you.
- Why do you need to know?
- I don't need to know.
I just thought we
could talk about it.
Do you know, I've never
liked the term boyfriend.
- Where did that come from?
- Are you seeing anyone else?
- Kind of.
Not really.
- I mean, so what is this?
Are we a thing?
- A thing?
- I don't know, are we
working towards something?
Do we have the talk?
- What do you mean, that talk?
Are you having that?
- I mean, yeah.
Yeah, I think we
should have that talk.
Or we don't need to.
Forget about it.
We can just--
- No.
Wait.
Wait.
Wait.
Wait.
Wait.
I'm sorry, it's
just scary for me.
I mean, I'm not sure I'm quite
comfortable admitting to myself
just how into you I am.
- You're into me?
- Really into you.
So if you don't want to
be called my boyfriend,
what would you want to
be called, my partner?
- God, no.
- No?
- Pretty boring.
So informal.
I want something a
bit more passionate.
Do you know what I think is
a really underrated term?
- What?
- Lover.
No.
No, I'm serious.
Lover.
My lover.
- My lover.
- I would love for a gorgeous
woman to call me their lover.
I went for a weekend
excursion with my lover.
- My lover.
- Yeah, my lover.
- Would you like to
fuck again, my lover?
- Yes, I would.
What are your fantasies?
- You mean like
what turns me on?
- M-hm.
- You first.
- I've always wanted
to have a threesome.
- Don't.
- How predictable.
No, fair enough.
I'd say it's a little overrated.
- What, you've done it?
Which way?
- Both.
Preferred it with two women.
- So what about you?
What can I do for you?
- Kind of like being tied up.
Restrained.
- Really?
I mean, we could try it.
- It's just something I like.
We don't have to.
- No, look, if you want to do
it, I want to do it for you.
Is this OK?
- Yeah.
- Yeah?
- A threesome is something
we could make happen.
- Really?
- Yeah.
I know some people.
- You know some people.
- Yeah.
- Oh, it's that easy.
You know some people.
- Yeah, why not?
- What else?
What else can I do for you?
- I like being choked.
- I can do it, but I don't know
how I'd feel doing that to you.
- You can grip harder.
Just help me.
- I don't know.
- That's OK.
Hey, it's OK.
It's OK.
- Look, I can try it, but I'm
not sure how I feel about it.
- It's OK.
Only works if we're
both having fun.
I love you.
- Me too.
- I love you!
- I love you.
- Axel, ow.
Ow.
Axel.
Axel.
- I love you.
- Over.
Oh, what the fuck!
- I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
- You don't fucking
listen to me!
Oh, fuck.
- Dakota.
Dakota, I need you.
Ah!
Ah!
Ow.
Dakota, help me!
Help me!
- Come on.
That's it.
OK.
Just go.
Oh, gosh.
Oh, god.
You're burning up.
We need to cool you down.
- Thanks for taking care of me.
- Just stay focused on me, OK?
- You mean so much to me.
Ow!
- What happened to you?
- What?
I don't know.
- OK.
It's OK.
It's OK.
Come.
Careful.
Look.
Oh, my.
I need to call an ambulance.
- No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No, love.
No.
No, stay.
I'm scared.
I don't know what's going on.
- I'm not going anywhere.
I'm just going to go into the
other room to get my phone, OK?
I'll be right back.
- You'll stay with me?
- I'm here for you.
I'll be right back, OK?
- OK.
- OK.
- OK.
- Great.
- Hello.
Emergency service operator.
Which service do you require--
fire, police, or ambulance?
- I need an ambulance.
My boyfriend--
there's someone here
that needs emergency
medical help.
- Where are you calling from?
Hello?
Hello.
- Please, can you come
and take him away?
- Can you just stay on the line?
- That thing is hideous.
- That thing is a
family heirloom.
- Well, it's a hideous
family heirloom.
- Do you know how
much that's worth?
- What?
- It's worth about
its weight in gold,
because it has
sentimental value.
- Well, it's fucking ugly.
- Dakota, you asked
me to move in.
You know?
I'm helping you pay rent.
- Yeah, that's fair enough.
I mean, it's your space now too.
I've got to start getting
ready for work now though,
so feel free not to save
me any boxes to unpack.
- You working at
the bar tonight?
- Yeah, I'm covering
a shift for Rose.
It's not like I
don't need the money.
- I thought we said--
oh, forget it.
It doesn't matter.
- It's not like I'm not
looking for another job.
- Yeah, and it's not like I
haven't tried to help you.
Try to hook you up with
a receptionist job.
- Oh, yeah, they probably
want you to change your hair
and remove your piercings
and cover up your tattoos.
- I'm just trying to help.
- I'm sorry.
- Fuck, I'm sorry.
- I'm genuinely sorry.
- I am sorry.
I am way, way more sorry.
- Fuck you, I'm the one
that's really sorry.
- I wish you could
be as sorry as I am.
- Why do we suck at fighting?
- Because we're so
fucking charming.
Look, it's you me
against the world, right?
- Damn right.
Right.
I've got to get ready for work.
- Why are you always
slapping my arse?
- 'Cause It's so fucking cute.
What are you doing?
- I just think it's maybe
time for some photos of us.
- Fair enough.
- Have a good time at work.
[dramatic music]
- Who the fuck are you?
- OK.
I'm going to need
a hand with this.
[dramatic music]
- He's definitely excreting it.
- You know, if you walked
into the hospital with these,
I'd say they were
chemical burns.
Seem pretty clean.
- I had to wash
them straight away.
- It looks like you
did a great job.
- Your breathing is fine.
Your pulse is normal.
Are you feeling any discomfort?
- I told you I feel fine, it's
just some sort of reaction.
It will clear up.
- With all due respect,
sir, you burned your partner
with something that's
excreting from your pores.
Your body is covered in
bruises and black veins.
I don't think there's a
term in Latin or anything
otherwise to describe
what is happening.
You're about as far from
fine as I can imagine.
- Yeah, well, I feel fine.
- He was having a
seizure earlier.
- She's overreacting.
Was shivering.
I was cold.
- That seems a bit
strange that you're
currently sitting
in ice cold water
and seem perfectly comfortable.
- I can give you
something for the pain.
- It's fine.
They don't hurt.
- These are chemical burns.
They should be excruciating.
- Look, you may feel fine
now, but the reality is,
is we don't know what
is happening to you.
Your body could be
in a state of shock.
- I'm not going anywhere.
- If you're in trouble,
you can give us a sign.
I mean, if you feel like
you couldn't say it,
just give us a signal.
- Why don't you just
give me some antibiotics
and leave me alone?
- Sir, I don't understand why
you're being so difficult.
- I didn't call you.
I don't want you here.
- Babe, I think it
might be for the best.
- Yeah, of course
you'd say that.
- Lover, I think
there's something
seriously wrong with you.
I think you need
to go with them.
- Why?
I don't want to go.
- Could you give us a minute?
- We'll be just outside, OK?
- Please, look at yourself.
- If I go to the hospital,
will you come with me?
- I think you need
to go on your own.
I think it's going to be
better if we stay apart.
That we make each other
miserable, and neither one of us
has had the courage to admit it.
- I make you miserable?
- No.
I'm saying we make each
other miserable, Axel.
- This is Rose's
bullshit, isn't it?
- Just let me speak.
I had a whole thing
prepared, and you just--
- Fuck off.
Just speak to me like
I'm a human being.
- Fine.
I'm leaving you.
I need to leave you.
- Wow, just like that.
- I just don't like you anymore,
and I don't think you like me.
- Fuck off.
Just stop patronizing me!
- Look, I think you just need
to take a minute and calm down.
All right, mate?
- Get the fuck out
of my face, mate.
- Take it down a notch.
Sir, as paramedics, we will not
tolerate any abusive behavior.
Ricky, stop it.
That isn't useful.
- I don't know.
It's OK.
We're OK.
- Fair enough.
Shake.
- Ricky.
- Come on, mate.
Put it behind us.
Ah, come on, mate.
[laughing] We good, yeah?
- Yeah.
Yeah, we're-- let go.
- I'm not.
- All right, let go.
Let go.
- Axel, let go.
- Let go.
No, no, no, no.
Don't do that.
Stop.
Stop.
Stop.
Hey.
Ah!
Oh, let go of me!
- All right, fuck off.
Get out of my house and
leave me and my lady alone.
[crunching sounds]
[gasping]
[screaming]
[intense music]
- You're infected.
- My germs are your germs.
[gasping]
[screaming]
- I just want you to
listen to my side.
So let's talk this out.
Sorry about the eye.
I love this lamp.
- I know you do.
- Do you know why
I love this lamp?
I love this lamp
because it reminds me
of my grandparents'
house that I used
to go to as a child when
things weren't good at home.
I love the lamp because
it makes me feel safety.
It makes me feel comfort,
respite from me parents'
fucking bad marriage.
But again, you wouldn't
know this, would you?
Dakota, you don't-- you don't
ask people questions about
themselves.
It's all me, me,
me, to do with me.
Because you want to break up.
The one I got saying
this, by the way,
maybe I don't want to break up.
Maybe I'd like to
work on our issues.
Talk to our problems,
instead of focusing on
oh, so unhappy, so unhappy.
Now, why do you get to
decide if we break up?
You don't I think I
have my issues with you?
Dakota, look at me
when I talk to you.
Look at me when I'm
fucking talking to you!
Your problem, Dakota,
is that you just
don't care about anything.
Anything.
You've become so fucking
jaded and cynical.
It's not my fault your
music career has gone kaput
and your little band
went down the drain.
It doesn't give you the excuse
to talk to me and other people
like shit in your fucking shoe.
Look at this place.
Look.
Genuinely.
Look at this nice place
that I bought for us.
I want to build
something with you.
I wanted a fucking
life with you.
And also, by the
way, for the record,
I never told you
to quit smoking.
That was your decision.
You decided that.
I supported you,
then I support you
when you act like I'm fucking,
I'm forcing you to do it?
Do you think that I don't
know you're smoking?
- Well, in that case, I'm
going to have a smoke.
That kink handcuffs, Axel,
they have a safety lever.
- You know, you're so selfish.
Excuse me if I want you
to live a little longer.
- Excuse me for
saying everything
in a passive aggressive
tone because I'm too
pussy just to come out with it.
- Stop fucking imitating me!
- Why do you even
want to be with me?
- I think--
I think of--
I think despite everything,
you still make me [indistinct]..
- Ah!
- Can you just stay
still and listen to me?
Seriously.
Dakota, what is wrong with me?
What is so bad about me?
I never cheated on you.
I paid your rent
when you were skint.
I even did that BDSM shit
you're into even though you know
it makes me feel uncomfortable.
- Fuck off.
I didn't force you
to do anything.
You stopped
communicating with me.
I'm not a fucking mind reader.
- What is so wrong with me?
- I thought you loved me for
me, but every day, you just
keep cutting me down.
If it's not you telling
me I'm not employable,
it's that I don't
make enough money
or that I embarrass you because
I fucked all my friends.
You moved me here even though
you knew I didn't want to.
I compromised for
you, and now, I
feel like I've got nothing left.
You just want me to
be a different person,
and you keep trying to change
me because the way I am just
isn't good enough.
- Well, I'm sorry that I don't
want to live in a shit hole
apartment, with pictures of
your tits and every bloke
you fucked all over
my living room wall.
- Do you know what, but
the photos is fair enough.
- No.
No.
No.
No.
Dakota, no.
- And do I fucking
hate this lamp.
- Don't.
You know how much
that that means to me.
- So if I break it,
will you let me go?
Well?
- No.
- Let's see.
- No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No.
No!
[gasping]
- Your germs are my germs.
If you really want to have
this out, we can have it out,
but please do you remember
I tried to make this easy.
- All right.
Bring it.
[sparring sounds]
- That was awful for me, Axel.
I thought I was supposed
to be meeting your mom,
but actually, I just got
fucking ignored the whole time.
- Come on, relax.
She says your tattoos look nice.
- No, she didn't.
She said, are you--
are you sure you're
going go be able to get
a job with those tattoos?
Fuck off.
- First of all--
- I get it from you,
and I get it from her.
Just leave me alone.
- If you act like
a child, I'm going
to speak to you like a child.
- You think you communicate
with me, but you don't.
I have no idea what
you want from me.
- I just feel like I'm not
enough for you sometimes.
- Well, what do
you want me to do?
- Maybe when we meet
someone from your past,
maybe don't tell me
that you fucked them.
- You know how we started.
Don't act like you don't
know I have a past.
- This isn't the past, Dakota.
This is like using your pussy
to shake hands with every cunt
that you fucking met.
- Ah!
- What's the matter, I though
you liked being dominated.
- Oh.
Ah!
I'm sleeping.
Just because you don't go
out doesn't mean I can't.
OK?
I like going out, and I like
having fun with my friends,
and I shouldn't
have to feel like I
have to stay home with my
boyfriend every single night.
What do you want, a pet?
- Do you want a
boyfriend, or do you
want an assistant to
bring you food and drink
and fucking tell you how
beautiful you are all the time?
- Because she was making
comments about it.
the whole way through!
- She was just
pointing stuff out.
- What do you want me to do,
turn up in a fucking flowery
dress and I don't
know, that is not me!
- Would it kill you to put
a fucking dress on for once?
- Are you fucking kidding me?
- No.
- Fuck off.
Actually, fuck off.
- I don't know what
the fuck is going on.
I'm living in fucking
cuckoo land here.
- Oh, fuck!
- Can I talk to you
about something?
- I can't find my keys, and
I'm going to be late for work.
- Wait, you're going
to be late for work
because you're going to have
to clean up this mess first.
- I do not have time
to clean up that mess.
- Look at the state
of this place.
Not just this room, fucking
this room, the bathroom.
- I will clean it up later, OK?
- Dakota, If we
don't clean it up,
no one is going to clean it up.
We need a change.
- OK, what do you want?
I'll start going somewhere
else to have my parties.
- I can't live like a student.
I would like to have a
shower that actually works.
I'd like to have a phone
that actually works.
I'd like to have
neighbors that don't
scream in the middle
of the fucking night.
And ideally, no fucking
parties at 4:00 in the AM.
- I don't know how to have this
conversation with you right now.
All I'm thinking about is
that I'm going to lose my job,
and then I'll have
less money, and then
there'll be more problems.
I am trying to stay afloat.
Can you just help?
Now, where are my keys?
- Two minutes, just listen.
I'll have a place.
I would like to buy
the place, and I would
like for you to live with me.
You can pay me back in some
sort of reimbursement scheme.
- I don't want to owe you
any more money than I already
fucking do.
- You already owe me
money, so it doesn't make
much of a fucking difference.
- It does.
It does make a
difference, because I
am going to have nothing left.
- Why are you making
this so difficult?
I'm coming with your
fucking solutions.
Ah!
Fuck's sake.
I just wish she could
be a bit more careful.
I don't want to live in a flat
with cigarette marks everywhere.
- Buy a blanket or
something to cover it up.
- With what money, Dakota?
God!
You don't have to do this.
You know I'm stronger
than you are.
Fun to grow up.
Ah!
Ah!
- Patronizing fuck.
For the record, this is how
you actually choke someone.
- Let's communicate.
Let's talk this out.
- I am trying to communicate.
- No, you're shouting at me.
- I am telling--
yes, because you're
not listening to me.
I'm fucking sick of you speaking
to me like I am a child.
I don't like fighting
like this, Axel.
Either get better aim
or sit down to pee.
I'm fucking sick of it.
[intense music]
[coughing]
- If you want out of
this relationship,
you're going to have
to go through me.
[screaming]
Let's not look so
serious all the time.
Could you just smile?
- You smile like an
idiot in every photo.
- Yeah.
Look, I just want a photo.
You're not doing the hard
rock chick thing all the time,
you know?
- I smile in photos.
- No, you smile
when you're drunk.
- OK.
You want me to fake it.
- Look, I just want a
photograph I can send to me mom
and I can put it on the wall.
Is that too much to ask for?
- OK.
Fine.
I have something to
say, and if you love me,
you'll let me get all the way
through without interrupting me.
Look, we make each other
miserable, and neither one of us
has had the courage to admit it.
Every time you
try to plan ahead,
I just can't help
but think maybe
I'll be rid of you by then.
That's bullshit.
I mean, you haven't
been perfect,
but I haven't been honest.
Maybe I let you on.
And I couldn't leave you because
I didn't know what I wanted,
but that wasn't fair on you.
You're scared.
I'm scared too, but
I'm more afraid of what
happens if we don't end this
while we have the chance.
You're not good for me, but
I'm not good for you either.
That's why we have to end this.
Let's make it to this the
last thing we do together.
- No.
- Agree to disagree then.
[gasping]
- Ah!
Ah!
- I hope we can
still be friends.
One.
Two.
One, two, three, four.
[suzi moon, "dumb & in luv"]
Act I, we met and some fun
Holding hands under
the blackpool sun
Act II, we drove in the van
I never thought I
would see you again
I'm dumb and in luv
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in luv
I'm dumb in luv
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in luv
Act III, I was
sitting at your bar
Guilty eyed disguised
as shooting stars
Act IV, you stab me in the back
Dirty rat, how dare
you live like that?
I'm dumb and in luv
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in luv
I'm dumb and in luv
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in luv
I'm dumb
So dumb
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in luv
I'm dumb, so dumb
Dumb, dumb, dumb and--
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in--
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in luv.
D-U-M-B L-U-V
L-U-V D-U-M-B
D-U-M-B
L-U-V
Does she know the
truth about me?
Well, I'm dumb and in luv
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in luv
I'm dumb in luv
Dumb, dumb, dumb in luv
Well, dumb, so dumb
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in luv
Well, I'm dumb
How dumb?
So dumb
That's luv
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in--
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in--
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in--
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in--
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in--
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in--
Dumb, dumb, dumb and in--
Dumb and in luv